#// tho i dunno how much of a vent this is ? 'cos i'm over it now lol

[demonsfate]

Seen Pucca talking about this and I figure it's a good time for me to share my RP server horror story. Pucca's experience reminded me why I don't ever join servers at all anymore. Okay, so I was a part of this DC server (directed toward a specific franchise but y'all probs know what it is if you know my other blog) and my GOD. It was wild. One thing, people weren't all that interested in threading with me. And usually when my muse does get acknowledged, he's either treated like the butt of the joke or for ppl to "put down." (Understandable in a way since the comics themselves do that to the poor guy. But my characterization was a very serious one that I wished people would respect)

My character brags, he gets put down, my character jokes about something, he gets put down, my character gets jealous - feelings don't matter. And it'd be one thing if these were how the characters would realistically react to mine. But then there was one of the mod's characters, and he had very similar traits to mine - arrogant and all that. Except... every muse hyped him up. For some reason when my muse brags, arrogance is bad. But when this muse bragged, arrogance good. Clearly it's a bias for the mod - who was a real big problem themselves but I'll get into that shortly.

Then there was a problem with a guy who was clearly jealous of a ship I had - they tried to do all they can to catch my ship partner's attention and try to "woo them". This eventually lead into a kind polyamorous thing which I didn't want because my muse, being a super jealous type, wouldn't so easily enter one. And again, when he expressed that, he got put down. And tbf, a lotta this arise from a proper lack of plotting with the ship partner, but it still stressed me tf out.

The mod I mentioned before was a huge jerk. They clearly had a lotta money (which is probs another reason why everyone "worshipped" them) and then like a snobby rich person, they put down everyone who buys anything "cheaper". They spend HUNDREDS, sometimes even THOUSANDS, on those ball joint dolls. Then they openly teased (made fun of) me for buying cheaper figures. Even though it's like, my current mental and physical state does not allow me to work rn and also? Even if I could? Not all of us are in a position where we can afford to buy pricey af dolls. Go fuck yourself.

What I'm about to talk about is a little controversial but. A trans woman wanted to play a "gender-bend" version of a male character (but as a female) and basically the cis people gained up on her to tell her how bad she is for that and everything. She gave her reason, that playing male characters makes her dysphoric and whatnot, but then they asking her why she wants to write the character despite the fact she gave her reason over and over again. It basically ended with her apologizing after being bullied for it and saying she won't do it. This one, of course, is a touchy topic but the fact that cis people were talking over a trans person flabbergasted me.

OH YEAH, and after that... somebody wanted to "brighten the mood" so sb @ me to give facts about my character, since I was hyperfixating hard and knew so much about them (y'all know how passionate I get!) and then this other fucking person starts GUILTRIPPING ME???? acting like I'M bad because that person was interested in my muse?? And THEY start going on about how nobody cares about theirs and how I'm ""lucky""?? Despite the fact they had WAY MORE threads than I did at the time??? Like literally wtf!

And finally... the weirdest fucking thing... nude posting. Despite the fact that this is a DC RP SERVER, almost EVERYONE started posting their nudes??? Some even posting videos OF THEM GETTIGN FUCKED BY THEIR SPOUSES?! Like it's so wild, it's almost hard to believe it was real. Like I knew I felt like I was on drugs when I saw what was happening. Eventually that same mod came back and even they were like "uhhh?? guys??? Maybe let's not post our nudes in a server full of STRANGERS?? You never know what weirdos might be here??" and then that's when people stopped. But it was like... holy shit. I just never saw that happened before??? These weren't even ppl with OnlyFans or something. It was just so bizarre. And I'm ok if ppl are fine with showing off their naked bodies and stuff if they wanna. But is a RP group really the appropriate place??? Especially when there's nothing inherently sexual about the server??? Like it felt highly inappropriate to me and just weird.

It got to the point where the original creator of the server (a mutual of mine) told me how nervous the place made them and how they don't feel comfortable going on. They thought it was their fault but then I explained that it is a horrible place full of toxicity and everything. They left the server, and eventually, so did I. This isn't the only reason why I don't join RP servers anymore. There was also another where whenever I spoke about my headcanons for my character, another person who rps that character would get so fucking upset and basically try to change the topic or get me to stop talking. Or straight up say they don't agree. OR when I point out how one of my "headcanons" IS canon, they literally called original writer STUPID! (Therefore calling me stupid too because I abide by that canon???) And one time when we agreed on something they said "omg I can't believe we finally agree on something!!" and made a big deal out of it and I literally told them we didn't have to agree on anything, that our takes are supposed to be unique to oursevles and it's something they shouldn't have to worry about (or get upset about lmao) and I've had other bad experiences, but this server was just the Worst. I think there are more bad moments too, but this is all I can remember rn.