#rodrick heffley x y/n

[cxsmiclore]

౨ৎ — LOSER RODRICK THOTS

rodrick hefflley x fem!reader | wc: 637

warnings: minors and ageless blogs do not interact! | sfw/nsfw, fluff, mention of jerking off, slight mention of oral ( r rec ), + slight p in v.

notes: nonnie, i hope you like this, very nervous as this is my first fic for roddy my beloved. this is also my first time writing loser bf!character so i hope i did good and will improve as i continue.

— masterlist 𐙚 previous fic 𐙚 taglist

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who loves jerking off to women magazines every night as he's imagining you in his mind wearing the bikinis that the models are wearing.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who has to spend his money on new magazines as the ones he is using is covered with his cum. Sometimes he seems to get carry away when his mind is on you.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who puts off cleaning to the last minute so he have to quickly hide the cum fill magazines under his mattress to avoid you ever finding them but he is not good at hiding all of them.

“Do you want something to drink?” He questions as he got off his bed. “Yes, some juice would be fine, please.”

Rodrick kisses your cheek briefly before running up his stairs, your cheeks heat up as you lay back in his bed onto his pillow which makes a weird crinkling noise causing you to sprint up.

“What was that?” You ask yourself as you inspect the pillow, noticing something is inside the pillowcase. You pull out the magazine from inside it.

Your eyes widen from the state of it especially when your fingers touch a white stain that was on the cover, it was sticky and it seemed fresh too as if he did it before you came over.

The sound of the door opening frightens you a bit as you drop the magazine under the bed, kicking it under so he doesn't know you found it, you lay back onto his bed with your phone in your hand pretending that you have been scrolling through it while he was away.

"Thanks babe," you praise as you reach for the cup, watching how his smile grows and you can’t help but let a smirk play on your lips.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who thinks his flirting is what made you love him so much but in all honesty, his cuteness is what made you fall for him — instead of telling him that, you make him think that it was the flirting to boost his ego.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who has to sneak you into the house late at night after the two of you came from a party in order not to wake his parents up.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who's claiming he will move out but currently loving the freebies he have at his parents house. You carry a love and hate relationship with it as you love the thrill of sneaking in but you hate the fact you have to be super quiet — if the two of you were at your place, you can make all the noise you can with a slight complaint from the neighbors.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who is a noisy whimpering mess in bed as he gets so pussy drunk. It is hot knowing that you could have him putty in your hands just by the sight of her.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who's sloppy at eating pussy that after you come, your juices would be all on his face but he doesn't stop going down at you, slurping up every last drop.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who's still learning how to please you just right as he pounds deep inside of your core, maintaining eye contact with you.

"Roddy... please can you angle yourself a bit," you mewl as you look up at him with half lidded eyes, loving the sounds of his groans that escape his mouth; fixing his angle just as you request, hitting all the right spots.

𖧧 — Loser bf!Rodrick who isn’t perfect at everything but you didn't let that stop you from falling in love with him as you just need to teach him a few things. He is all yours and nothing else matters to you.

comment section: @cherriespopsicle.

꒰ end of video. — all rights reserved © cxsmiclore 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[queerpumpkinnn]

Kinktober 5th: Goldmine

aka hair pulling with Rodrick Heffley

2k words

Summary: Rod learns something new.

Pairing: Rodrick Heffley x reader

Warnings: hair pulling obviously, choking, vaginal fingering, unprotected piv sex (don't do this at home kids), smoking, thigh riding, lots of hickeys/biting, scratching, lots of sweet praise but it's also kinda condescending, this is just porn with very minimal plot, let me know if I missed anything!

While reading, I recommend you listen to the altar is my hips - a Spotify playlist by me!

~

"Y'think I should get a leather jacket?"

Your shoulders shook under the weight of Rodrick's arm as you chuckled. "Why, you get an idea for a costume?"

"Absolutely. Even got the name for it." You could see the familiar smirk he wore even as your eyes remained on the screen. Smoke billowed in your peripheral, the smell of his near-finished cigarette long since clung to your clothes.

"It'd be a cute couples costume too," he continued, "you could be Tina Gray."

You turned to look at him. "Oh could I now?"

"Yup." He grinned as he put his cigarette out. "You've got the bedroom personality for it too."

You swung a pillow at his face, but Rodrick easily caught it and tossed it behind him. You huffed in false annoyance, falling back into your spot curled up under his arm.

His hand fell absentmindedly to your hair, gently twirling strands around his finger. The sensation makes your eyelids heavy, getting sleepy as he continued to soothe you.

Until you felt a sharp tug. Your eyes flew open, and you audibly gasped. Your entire body froze, and you curse yourself when Rodrick turns his head. A soft "oh?" leaves his lips, which are curled up into a curious smile. It had only been playful tug, but that was before he knew you'd react like that.

"That's not how you do it," you breathe, ghost of a grin teasing your lips.

"Yeah?" His voice was a condescending lilt. "How d'you do it?"

Instead of speaking, you take hold of his wrist, pushing it towards the back of your head. His fingers thread into your roots and he takes a fistful, tugging slowly. Your eyes flutter shut and your lips part in a deep sigh.

Before your eyes close, you catch a glimpse of your boyfriend's reaction. His eyes are wide and full of amusement, and he's smirking incredulously. His brows raise, and you can see the gears turning in his brain.

"That's interesting," Rodrick mumbled, almost more to himself. "I wonder..."

He climbs up over you, legs caging in on either side of your hips. His foot kicks the TV remote onto the floor but Elm Street is long forgotten. His hold on your hair returns, the tingling in your scalp pulling a weak noise from your throat.

"Now, what would happen..." Rodrick's thought trails off as his fingers ghost over your throat, touch only featherlight until the pads of his fingers find your pulse points and press. Your breathing is shaky and your vision begins to blur, but your hands still fly to his shoulders. You might have even been a little embarrassed at how your hooded eyes began to cross if not for the fact that it just felt so good.

"Aw, y'like that?" Rodrick lilts, his face pulling closer to yours. Heat creeps up your neck.

"Y-yeah," you attempt to nod, but you aren't given much room for movement.

"I like that too, baby." He murmurs against your mouth before he kisses you slowly, tasting of nicotine and gum. They were gentle, teasing kisses, but quickly gave way to a more desperate rhythm as his tongue glided over your lower lip. He hummed a deep note when you let him in, when you whimpered as he started sucking on your tongue.

You let out a disappointed noise when Rodrick lets go of you, rolling back to sit but it's forgotten when he pats his thigh. You quickly oblige, skin heated and brain frazzled.

As soon as you're sat on his leg, the friction to your clit has you gasping into his mouth. Almost involuntarily, your hips began to roll against him, so slowly but enough to make your head swim and heat boil in your gut.

"Oh, sweetness," Rodrick murmurs in between kisses, "so needy already? I've barely done anything."

He knows he doesn't need to do much. Just a few words- or a tug of the hair- and you'd be turned into a pile of mush. He knows you too well, and he loves having that effect over you.

Even though he's teasing you, you can't be bothered to care, muttering an mhm and rutting your hips faster. Your hands fall from his shoulders to his chest, then trail to his thigh to ground yourself.

"Atta girl, keep goin'." Rodrick murmurs in your ear, licking a stripe down the shell of it, planting soft kisses wherever his lips wandered. "'M right here baby, that's it, yeah, good girl."

Rodrick's encouragement was sweet honey to your ear, and a sickening contrast to the hand that hand re-found purchase at your scalp, tilting your head back so that he could teethe at your neck, soft plucks of skin turning into bruising. Deft hands made work of your top, leaving your chest bare.

Your rutting became increasingly frustrated; your thighs burned and you weren't getting any closer to your high.

"Rod... need..." your words were mumbled and breathless, and your brain was too cloudy to be fully coherent anyway.

"Hm? Couldn't hear you, bunny, say that one more time?"

"Need more," you cried, hands pushing into Rodrick's hair when his tongue laved over your nipple.

"More what, baby?" He lilted, cupping and pinching your other tit lovingly. He groaned when your fingers clutched his hair tighter.

"Need you, Rod please..." you sighed, tugging at his wrist.

Rodrick chuckled. "Baby, I don't think I can do that. Might hurt you if I don't get you nice and prepped, yeah? How about we start with fingers?"

"Anything, please," you babbled, nestling your head into the crook of his shoulder.

"Alright, alright, I got ya. Let's get these off, hm?" He tugged at the belt loop of your pants. They were off in record time, along with your underwear, leaving your entire body bared to him. You felt naked, more than just literally.

Once you were situated on his lap again you tried pulling on the hem of his shirt. "Off," you mumbled. Happily he complied, and you took the opportunity to lean forward and plant loving kisses to his neck, his collarbone.

You didn't realize when you'd risen up off your behind that it gave Rodrick the space to slip a hand between your legs, pulling a squeak out of you, muffled against his jaw.

"Aw, so messy baby. A little hair pulling did all this?"

You knew that it was a few other things, but you were so far gone you gave him a whiny 'yeah' anyway. Rodrick's fingers massaged your entrance, gathering slick and smothering it around your clit, making obscene noises- probably on purpose.

"So fuckin' wet, sweet, y'hear that?" Rodrick presses kisses to your pulse point, up to your jaw, then kisses you deep. Swallowing your moans into his mouth as the kiss turns messy.

"Please, Rod..." you're breathless and your pleas are barely coherent, but Rodrick knows exactly what you're asking for. You keel when you feel a finger glide into you, curling up towards your stomach.

"Yeah, good fuckin' girl." Rodrick's grin widens at your reaction when a second finger joins the first. "Always so eager, hm? That's my girl."

"Yeah, 'm your girl," you pant, hips canting to meet his hand.

"That's right," he coos, thumb tracing wide circles over your clit. "So proud of you, my girl."

"Rod," you whine, "need you."

"Hm?" He hums between nips to your collarbone. "You have me."

You shake your head vigorously. "Need you inside."

This gets Rodrick's attention. His fingers slow, while his free hand moves from your hair to his pants. He makes quick work of his pants, pulling his half-hard cock out from his boxers. You watch as he takes his fingers, soaked from your cunt, and wrap them around himself, stroking slowly. His head falls back against the couch, lips hanging open and you feel the sudden urge to bite them.

Before you get the chance, however, Rodrick is pulling you forward, lining himself up to take you. Slowly, so slowly, he runs the tip of his cock through your folds, smearing your slick around. You jerk when his head catches on your clit, sending electricity shooting up your spine.

"Rod..." you whine against his neck, "please."

"Please what?" You want to slap him for the knowing glint in his eye, but that was for another day.

"Please fuck me."

And who was he to deny you? Guiding your hip, Rodrick eased you down on him, guiding you but letting you set your own pace. The stretch set your loins on fire, but it was heaven.

Your head kicked back, and you let your voice have a mind of its own as you sunk down on him. Long and pornographic, and Rodrick matched it. You felt him throb inside of you.

"Fuck, sound so pretty." Rodrick started rolling his hips into you, and you cried out at the sensation. "Yeah, that's it. Moan like a fuckin' whore for me, c'mon."

And who were you to deny him? You had the house to yourself, and the name alone sent your brain into overdrive. He filled you up so nicely, and the drag of his cock inside of you made your skin tingle with delight.

"Rod, yeah, oh- just like that, ohmygod-" your voice was caught in your throat when Rodrick, with the usual knowing twinkle in his eye, takes a fistful of hair and tugs you forward into a sloppy kiss.

All of the sensations- that Rodrick was giving you- were sending you closer and closer to tumbling headfirst off of that ledge. The sting in your scalp, his tongue sliding against yours, the sounds of wet slaps and your combined moans. The smell of cigarettes and the heat of his skin under your fingers. The head of his cock piledriving into your cervix again and again and again.

"Rod I- oh god, I'm gonna- oh, so close- Rod please," you pant into his mouth, fingers raking down his chest and leaving faint red lines in their wake.

"I gotcha," he grunts, hand snaking between your bodies to press circles over your clit. You can hear it in his voice that he's holding back. You don't want him to. "That's it, baby, come for me. Make a mess on my cock, c'mon."

That extra pleasure is all it takes to have you diving headfirst into a mind-numbing orgasm. Your eyes screw shut, and all you can feel is Rodrick. Shaky hands rest on his shoulders, holding on for dear life as hot pleasure courses through you.

You're acutely aware of the hot spurts hitting your cervix, and the fluids seeping out of you, but your body is still tingling all over. Your voice has long since become scratchy, but that doesn't stop you from whimpering and crying as he coaxes you through it.

"Good girl, did so good for me, yeah?" His grip on your hair is no longer a grip, but gentle, soothing strokes, almost as if to apologize.

You hummed, dropping your forehead against his shoulder as you breathe. The smell of sex had permeated the air around you, and you were suddenly very aware of how sweaty you'd become.

"Think we need a shower, baby, c'mon." Rodrick nudged your head.

You wanted to, you felt sticky, but your body was on fire, this time with a less-than-pleasurable ache. Begrudgingly, you lifted yourself off of his now soft dick, hobbling down to reach for your clothes and then to the nearest bathroom.

The shower was peaceful, and the water was soothing on your muscles. You both worked in a comfortable silence.

"Well, I was right." Rodrick finally said.

"About what, the hair pulling?"

"Nope."

You turned around to face him, head tilted in confusion. His mouth was curled upwards and his eyes were lifted in a smile.

"You do have the bedroom personality of Tina Gray."

~

Rodrick Heffley Masterlist

Kinktober 2023 Masterlist

Miscellaneous Characters List

Main Masterlist

~

[reareaotaku]

No Fun Babysitting

Summary: Greg's mother gets him and Manny a babysitter, because Rodrick is 'too busy' with Band practice, and she wants a reliable sitter while her and Frank go out. Though, Rodrick's plans change when he finds out who the babysitter is. Pairings: Rodrick x Fem! Reader [Since my Rodrick posts always tend to do well, here's another you Rodrick lovers!] God this probably so dumb lol. So sorry if it's bad lol

"A babysitter?" Greg looked at his mother like she was crazy. He was 13, he didn't need a babysitter! Maybe Manny, but certainly not him. "Why do I need a babysitter?"

His mother, Susan, finishes drying off a plate, before turning towards him, "Well, Rodrick," She gestures to Rodrick who was sitting at the dining room table eating a bowl of cereal, "has a gig and I need someone reliable to watch you and Manny while me and your father are out."

"Doesn't Gramma usually watch Manny?" Rodrick asked, since they had never offered to pay HIM to watch the kids.

"She's busy."

"Why can't I watch Manny?"

Susan laughs, causing Greg to frown and roll his eyes.

"Oh, Greg. You have not shown me you are responsible enough to care for a goldfish, much less your little brother. Besides, she's supposed to be really good, her name is Y/n."

Rodrick almost spit out his food when he heard the name of Y/n and he was very quick to clarify, "Y/n? Like Y/n L/n, Y/n?"

Susan hums, before rubbing her chin and nodding, "Yes I believe so."

"She's going to be here?"

"Why do you care?" Greg quick asked, suspicious.

"I don't," Rodrick quickly justifies, trying to cover up his previous excitement. He quickly gets up and heads to his room, completely forgetting about the food.

Susan and Greg watched as he left, while the latter grew suspicious.

---

"Thank you so much for coming at such late notice," Susan hands you Manny, who wiggled in her grasp.

"It's really no problem, Mrs. Heffley. I hope you and your husband have a good night out."

"Me, too," She jokes, before shaking her head, "Our numbers are on the fridge and if we don't answer, there's the number of the restaurant...."

You nod your head, listening as she goes on and on about safety and such. When she finally left, you waved her off before carrying Manny into the living room. "So, what do you like to do, Manny?"

Before he could answer, Rodrick quickly rushes in, his guitar hanging off his back. He was covered in sweat and his hair was dismayed/a mess. He pushes his hand through his hair, before looking at you in feigned confusion.

"Oh, Y/n right? I didn't know you were going to be here."

"What are you talking about? Mom sai-"

Rodrick quickly got his shoe and threw it at Greg, hitting him smack in the face. He [Rodrick] pushes inbetween you and Manny, leaning on his hand, "Hey."

"Hi?" You looked past him, towards Manny, who was pushing on Rodrick's back.

"What.. uh, brings you around?"

"Um... What do you mean?"

He turns to face forward , leaning back on his hands, "Uh, you know, ummm...." He clicks his tongue, before looking back at you, "You like music, right?"

"Everyone likes music."

"Right!" He stands up pointing to you, Manny finally looking relieved that Rodrick had moved from his spot.

Manny gets down from the seat and pulls out a puzzle from under the table. You watch him closely as Rodrick still continues to talk.

"I'm in a band, you should come listen."

"Uhuh... Band?" You now looked at him when registering his words.

"Oh, yeah. We're called the Loaded Diaper [Löded Diper]."

"Loaded Diaper?"

"Yeah."

"When you hear them, you'll understand the name," Greg jokes, before hiding under the table when seeing Rodrick's glare.

You look at Greg, before humming and nodding, "I see. Ummm... What kind of music do you guys play?"

"Rock."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense... Um... Maybe I can come some time."

"Yeah, you should. Just let me know when you're free."

"Yeah, will do."

He walks away from the living room and out the front door, but not before fist bumping, thrilled to have a 'date' kind of.

[crljhnn]

Sleepy kisses

Pairing: Rodrick Heffley x gender-neutral Reader

Summary: You like giving your sleeping boyfriend kisses on the cheek. Your boyfriend likes receiving kisses on the cheek. But then Rodrick gets greedy.

No physical description; No use of y/n

Word count: 1.9k

Warnings: A bit of conflict but no intense angst

[Posted on AO3 as well]

In your opinion, your boyfriend is just the cutest when he is asleep.

There probably aren't a lot of people that would agree with you on that one. However, in your eyes, his slight drooling and open-mouth snores are just adorable.

Maybe this impression could be explained by the fact, that you both were still in the very early stages of your relationship. Having just made things official a few weeks ago.

That's why you couldn't resist giving Rodrick a small kiss on the cheek or the forehead whenever you found him asleep. Which, now that you think about it, has happened a lot more often in the last few weeks than it used to.

Rodrick was taking a nap after school when he made a great, revolutionary discovery.

You two had plans to hang out that day, so after your extracurriculars were done, you went straight over to the Heffleys' house. A difference you noticed that day, was that you weren't greeted at the door by your boyfriend like usual, but by his mother. After exchanging a few quick pleasantries with Susan you made your way up to his room.

Hearing someone come up the stairs Rodrick woke up. Assuming it was his mom he decided to act like he was still asleep, to avoid whatever chore she came up to assign him. So when he felt the bed dip beside him, created by you sitting down, he was surprised to hear your voice, instead of Susans, greeting him.

He was about to 'wake up‘ when he felt you gently placing a small kiss on his forehead, accompanied by a short gush about how cute he was.

And just like that Rodrick was hooked.

Everyone else calling him cute would have probably set him off, but when it came to you, every tiny compliment made butterflies burst in his stomach. You probably weren't even capable of offending him, even if you tried to.

After throughout research (aka fake sleeping a lot in your company) he came to the conclusion, that you just seemed to like to give him small kisses whenever he was dozing off.

Little did he know, that you were just as willing to give him those when he was awake. All he had to do was ask.

However, Rodrick being the dumb, lovesick puppy he was, decided that the most logical way to make use of this new information was to 'sleep‘ every time you entered a room. That way he would get the most kisses possible.

You on the contrary started to get worried. There seemed to be something wrong with your boyfriend lately. He was sleeping a lot more than usual, and that said something if you are talking about a lazy teenage boy, who even before took at least one nap a day.

Maybe it was a medical issue that caused him to get tired all the time. You hardly ever saw him not asleep. Was he not sleeping at night? Did he struggle with night terrors? Is there a way you can help?

When you first noticed his new sleeping habit, his naps were still limited to the first few minutes after you reached his house. The routine usually went something like that: When you arrived he would be asleep, you would gush a bit about him a little and give him a quick smooch. Then he would wake up about 10 minutes later.

But then it really started to pick up.

You would only leave the room for a short amount of time, for example, to use the bathroom or to get some water. Before, Rodrick always used to do things like getting you something to drink, for you. He was constantly jumping at every opportunity to do something nice. But all of a sudden he stopped. Now, after doing the small task yourself, you would return to find your boyfriend asleep.

And then he started to fall asleep with you right next to him. He would put on a movie or some music, then lay down on his bed or couch, and just minutes later he'd be out.

Another realization you have come to is that you didn't get to hear his soft snores anymore, which you used to adore so much. But that was likely because he didn't reach a deeper sleeping phase, right? That must be the reason, right?

Wrong.

One day you were coming over unannounced and that was when you saw it. While climbing up the stairs to Rodricks room you already called out a greeting, alarming your boyfriend of your presence. Like always, he threw himself straight onto his bed, closing his eyes.

What he hadn't realized, was that you were already able to see him from the position you were at.

And at that moment the self-doubt started. Did he not enjoy being around you? Was this his way of getting out of talking to you? Was he going to break things off?

Your thoughts kept spiraling, convincing you of the most horrible things imaginable. You felt hurt and tears were building up in your eyes embarrassingly fast. You had to sit down.

In the end, you came to the conclusion, that he never actually liked you and probably was making fun of you with his friends all along. Or he fell in love with someone new. Or he just decided one day that you were revolting. That must be it.

While you were drowning in self-doubt, Rodrick was getting impatient. Where was his kiss? Well, he knew he was probably pushing the limits a bit, but come on, that was no excuse for you to deprive him of his precious kisses.

Sneakingly opening one eye, he looked over at you, covering up his movements with a blatant fake yawn, trying to figure out what you were waiting for. What he wasn't anticipating, was to find you looking rather distraught, like you just saw a ghost and were about to start bawling at any moment.

Hastily he scrambles up and reaches for you.

"Baby, what's wrong? Oh my god don't cry, please don't cry." He was panicking. Rodrick had no idea how to comfort you. Now awkwardly petting your head. He was not prepared for this. Should he get his mom? She would surely know what to do. He didn't know how to console someone.

During his inner monologue, you were pulling away from him. "Why don't you like me anymore?" You sounded pathetic but were too upset to care about it right now.

Were you overreacting? Probably. But you're allowed to. Rodrick was your first everything. Your first real crush, your first real boyfriend, the first person you held hands with romantically, and your first kiss. You didn't know how to handle a situation like this, making everything quite overwhelming.

"What?" how the hell did you come up with that? He liked you, liked liked you. "Why would I be with you if I didn't like you? Who put this nonsense in your head? Was it Greg? I swear-"

"It was you! You don't like me anymore. What does your brother have to do with that?"

"Me?" What had he done to give you that impression, 'Come on Rodrick, think'.

"Yeah," sniffle "You don't want to spend time with me. And to think I was concerned for you! I was researching all the possible reasons for you to be so tired all the time. All while you were faking the whole time, solely to get out of hanging out with me! Why didn't you just say it outright? You coward!"

"That's not true!" Rodrick was nervous. How was he supposed to explain the real reason behind it all without making a fool out of himself? "We always still hung out after I woke up, so your theory doesn't even make sense. And I was always actually asleep!"

"That's not true. I literally just saw you throw yourself onto your bed the second you heard my voice."

"I was sleepwalking."

"Rodrick!"

"I wanted to scare you?" He was grasping at straws.

"Oh okay, that explains it all, sorry for the misunderstanding."

"Really? Great. So I was thinking we could- hey what are you doing?" Rodrick stopped in the middle of his sentence when he saw you standing up and crossing his room.

"I'm leaving. I can't force you to tell me the truth, but I also won't be sitting here playing 'happy relationship' with you."

You pulling away was the last thing Rodrick wanted, so he had no other option than, to tell the truth.

"No wait, I'm gonna explain. But it's embarrassing."

You cross your arms, still standing at the top of the stairs, ready to leave but again willing to hear him out.

He had no idea how to start.

„I just- how do I say this, look, you were right, I was fake sleeping.“

Honesty it is.

„Oh wow, I would have never been able to come up with this.“ You were indeed able to come up with this.

„But it was an accident, I swear!“

"Rodrick," You looked exhausted. "How the fuck do you fake sleep on accident?"

"It was an accident! At least the first time."

That doesn't explain much to you. The whole situation was still weird and confusing.

"So you just decided to make it a habit? And why were you fake sleeping in the first place?"

"The first time I had just woken up because I heard someone coming up the stairs. And because I was still in a daze from just taking a nap, I forgot our plans or that you were coming over. At least for a second. So when I heard footsteps I assumed it were my mom's and she was coming to bug me. So to avoid that, I acted like I was still asleep. Then I realized it was you, but before I could say something, you-"

"I?"

"You kissed me. And then I thought if you saw me sleeping again, you would also kiss me again, and you did. So I just continued acting asleep around you." Saying it out loud made him feel kind of ridiculous.

"Crazy suggestion, we are literally in a relationship, why didn't you just, I don't know, ask for a kiss?"

"Just ask?" he didn't believe that to be an option.

"Yeah. Like, 'Hey can I have a kiss?'."

"And then you would have kissed me?" It couldn't be that easy.

"Yeah? And you could also have had real kisses, rather than only ones on the cheek or forehead." Why was this so hard for him to grasp?

"Wow." He was still a mixture of skeptical and mindblown.

"So can we agree that from now on you just ask if you want something from me, instead of making me think you have some disease or lost interest in me?"

He nodded, still having a dazed, stupid look on his face.

"Thank you. And sorry getting so worked up over that."

But Rodrick was hardly listening to you, still stuck on the fact that he could just ask you for a kiss. He was pining over you for way too long, so now he had to sometimes remind himself that you were dating now. He had to try it out to believe it.

"Can I have a kiss?"

"Of course."

You lean over to give Rodrick a quick but sweet kiss.

"It worked, you kissed me."

Your boyfriend is an idiot. A cute idiot though.

[sunnysoulzz]

Perv!Rodrick x gn!reader

(This might make some readers uncomfortable, if you aren’t comfortable with some of this, please don’t read it!)

Warnings: rodrick is a bit of a pervert, masturbation (both rodrick and reader), you are rodricks neighbour, rodrick fantasies about you lmao, no mention of readers gender, not proof read sorry, honestly he’s a little ooc in this

Perv!Rodrick who you had lived across from for years. Who had just accidentally seen you getting out of the shower, the way the water clung to your body, the way the towel barely covered what he wanted to see. He couldn’t stop himself from getting hard.

Perv!Rodrick who couldn’t meet your eye in class. He’d stare at you, only to look away, his ears and face flushed, when you looked back at him.

Perv!Rodrick who would watch you get yourself off. He’d take his belt and jeans off, let his aching cock free and match your rhythm. He felt guilty about it.

Perv!Rodrick who you’d hangout with during neighbourhood parties, since no one else your age lived around you. He’d stutter and smiled nervously, his mother knew thought he had a crush on you. He’d try to flirt, but he fumbled over his words and ended up just feeling embarrassed.

Perv!Rodrick who was forced to hangout with you when both of your parents became friends. The both of you would hangout in your room, he’d stand awkwardly by the door, thinking about the things he could do with you right now.

Perv!Rodrick who’d sit on your bed when you went to the bathroom, who’d try to hide his boner as his hands gripped your blanket. He’d be to nervous to actually steal your underwear or something, but he thought about it.

Perv!Rodrick who’d go home and take a long cold shower, fucking his fist as he thought about you.

Perv!Rodrick who you’d hang out with a few more times, who’d always have to excuse himself to the bathroom, or who always had his hand, or a pillow, or anything cover his crotch.

Perv!Rodrick who finally got the chance to properly flirt with you at a party. He’d walk over to you, a smirk on his face as he tried to tell you how pretty he thought you were. Perv!Rodrick who got a boner the second you smiled back at him, leaning towards him as you giggled at his attempt at flirting again. You placed your hand on his making him jump and smile, which was quickly wiped off his face when you walked off to talk to a friend.

Perv!Rodrick who excused himself to the bathroom and jerked off with the hand you touched. He thought about taking you home after this party, shoving you up against the wall as his cock moved in and out of you.

Perv!Rodrick who still can’t look you in the eye but still watches you though the window when he feels needy

[turvi]

Chicks Dig Bad Boys

Rodrick Heffley x Reader

According to Y/n, Rodrick was just another emo boy, a loser, a typical teenage dirtbag. At least, this is what she heard from Heather Hills. Y/n was shocked Heather even chose to talk to her. Not just because Heather is the 'it girl' of Westmore High School.

Y/n had cracked the code to deal with high school, and that was to avoid joining any kind of group and not get noticed by anyone. Even if you somehow develop a crush on someone, keep it a secret. So she was surprised when Heather sat beside her and decided to talk to her. Y/n merely shrugged her shoulder and nodded at appropriate times as she spoke, tuning out the blonde girl.

Of course, you were aware of the crush the boy was harbouring for Heather especially when he made a show of ruining Heather's birthday. Y/n saw it all happen and thought how Rodrick actually had a nice voice and had potential. So when Rodrick happened to sit beside her in the English class she off-handedly complimented his voice.

Y/n had expected him to give her a smug smile or make an inappropriate joke. What she didn't expect was to find a very flushed Rodrick who was trying to find the correct words to say to her. She couldn't believe her eyes. She never saw Rodrick become so flustered.

"Uh..th..thank you...it...it means a lot." Rodrick wanted to slap himself for speaking like forgot how to speak. Yeah sure he got a few claps and hollers when his band played but no one complimented his voice.

"Was that the first time you sang?" now she was intrigued. Rodrick looked up and saw a genuine smile on her face. He took a breath of relief. He had thought she was making fun of him.

"Uh..yeah. I only sing when we perform in my garage. I wanted to do something special for Heather. But clearly, it went wrong." he said as he ran his hand through his hair. Y/n almost extended her hand to fix his unruly hair but dropped her hand when she saw him smile. She felt her heart flutter

Shit

Now she had something to say to Rodrick, but she forgot when she saw him smile like that. Boys like him were not supposed to smile like that. He was not supposed to have such a soft smile. Her trance broke when she saw him smirking.

"I saw you last night...not in a creepy way. I mean... obviously, during all that chaos at Heather's birthday, I saw you." there was that damned smile again. "I didn't know you were friends with her." His tone had a genuine wonder.

Y/n chuckled. "I helped her a few times with assignments..not really a friend, but we know each other, plus free food. Who can say no to that?"

Y/n felt her cheeks warming up under his gaze and tried to hide it under the curtain of her hair when she suddenly felt his fingers against her cheek as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. At that moment, she realised Rodrick actually saw her. She realised Rodrick was more than a teenage dirtbag that the world told her to stay away from.

She cleared her throat "I have heard your band play...when I come to tutor Greg."

Rodrick's hand grew sweaty. He knew how loud his band practice was, mainly to annoy Greg and his best friend Rowley. But he can't help but felt guilty as he realised how much of a nuisance it would have been for her.

"I am so sorry if our practice disturbed you guys"

"Oh no it's ok..I actually don't mind. I like that kind of music. Although it would be nice if the volume is a bit low."

"yeah...yeah absolutely...no big deal we can even practice a bit later."

Rodrick looked ahead trying his best to control a giddy smile. He did not expect his morning to be this good.

"Great...so I will see you in the evening..if you don't mind"

"yeah yeah totally" Rodrick quickly responded with a big smile. He was looking forward to meeting her this evening...after he locked Greg in the basement again.

A/N: Ladies and Gentlemen the boy who got me into bad boys. Rodrick Heffley. I couldn't stop myself from writing for him. I feel like a teen again. REBLOG AND COMMENT if you like this.

[kaicubus]

Dating Rodrick Heffley

₊˚⊹♡ ∘₊ ───────────── ₊˚⊹♡ ∘₊ ─────────────── ₊˚⊹♡ ∘₊

warnings ✩° : fluff headcanons, cursing.

pairing ✩° : rodrick heffley x fem!reader

authors note ✩° : this is so random but i was on tik tok and i saw an edit of him and i was slapped in the face with this idea!! yiPEEEEE!!!! this is the content i intended on posting when everything settled.

────────────────────────────────────────────

Your parents are convinced that Rodrick is a bad influence on you, and they're right. Being with Rodrick has changed you for the worst and for the better, he’s seen you at your lowest and your highest. But he’s proud of you no matter what happens. In fact, he’s your biggest supporter.

Being over after school every day means you bond really well with his family, and they love you since you seem to have a better influence on him than anything else. I mean, ever since you two started dating, he’s actually been doing his homework and his attendance has significantly improved. That being said, you are definitely a celebrity to Rodrick’s little brother and his friend, Greg and Rowley.

Speaking of the two, you're like their saving grace when it comes to shielding them from the teenage angst that is Rodrick—or in their eyes, the biggest bully they've ever encountered.

There have been many times where Greg tries explaining to you just how bad of a brother Rodrick is, but he never gets farther than a few words before Rodrick slams the door in his face or spills some drink he’s holding onto him.

He’s not that open to listening to your kind of music (if it’s drastically different than the kind of stuff he would listen to) but in secret...in secret he kicks his feet and twirls around imagining you doing the same thing to all the lyrics. He’s a cutie patootie when he’s not being a resentful menace.

Despite that, you spend most of your after school days in Rodrick’s bedroom, garage, or his van just talking about things or listening to him play. He plays a kind of music you never thought you’d listen to before, but have grown to like because not only does he have CDs of all his songs burned into them, but plays other music similar to that genre.

He makes multiple efforts to teach you the guitar with you on his lap and the guitar pressing you both together, but all those times Greg comes in because he wants to try and get on your good side.

If you're not there at band practice, like how you normally are, Rodrick makes all these mistakes and fumbles with playing. Since you're the designated band girlfriend, it’s pretty much a necessity for you to be around him when he practices, otherwise he gets nothing done. Sometimes it’s a problem, but for the most part, you’re like his buff.

Rodrick’s banned from your house because he tried sneaking in your room through your window, but he ended up landing on your mom’s patch of freshly bloomed flowers. When she found out, she wasn’t happy, and even though she tried so hard to excuse his looks, his lack of direction, his rebellious nature, she just couldn’t excuse the sad death of her flower children. So she banned him. Now you guys have to meet in secret or at school or his house, just anywhere not near your house.

He still makes an awkward effort to get your parents to like him, but it never really works out. He either shows up late or shows up with half his clothes missing or drenched in strange fluids because of pranks pulled by his little brother on his way out.

“Mrs. and Mr. L/n—”

“Lime green paint...on my white porch. Can you believe it, honey?”

“Just go, kid.”

“Alright!”

He gives you rides to and from school in his janky ass van, but it’s your only form of transportation so you don’t complain. Everything pretty much happens in that van. Everything.

His form of PDA is wrapping an arm around you loosely and just walking with you, not so much holding your hand. He also really likes just resting his arm on your head or squishing your cheeks together to make funny faces even if it pisses you off sometimes, he thinks it’s cute.

Free band dates!! Meaning that, you get free access to Löded Diper gigs, and the best seats watching your boyfriend and his band mates thrash around. You also get free merch...teehehehehe...

Oddly enough, Rodrick ends up turning soft for you and doing things no one in his family would expect out of him. Like taking you out on drive in dates, or getting you flowers, or just smiling more. Not saying he’s emo or edgy, but he is pretty punkish and reluctant to show any sort of affection. It certainly is off putting to Greg at least. 

He asks you to do his eyeliner because you have an unlimited supply of it, and at least he doesn't have to use his mom’s anymore. People can usually tell when you do his eyeliner and when he does it himself; it’s pretty easy to differentiate.

If Rodrick doesn't want to be someplace and is dragged along by his family, the mere mention of you attending the same event makes him suddenly excited to be there. More excited than the planner. He’ll go on tangents about you, and it really doesn’t matter who’s listening. He looks all bad and mean, but as soon as someone talks about you, his face changes completely.

[slut4sugu]

𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐒 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌— RODRICK HEFFLEY X BLACK!READER

ʚ 🍓ɞ including + warnings: rodrick being a nervous boyfriend, black!reader, toothrotting fluff, suggestive themes ʚ 🍓ɞ summary: what it’s like dating Rodrick heffley <33

ʚ 🍓ɞ FIRST WEEKS DATING

HELLA SHYYY, despite putting up a ridiculous cool persona when it comes to being around you and your sweet smile all by himself he crumbles

Is scared to indulge in pda or physical intact with you because he’s afraid of coming off as clingy, but once you sit him down and let him know that you’re just as clingy if not more than he is, he starts to loosen up a little

constantly falls asleep with his head in your shoulder whenever around you and he gets tired

Starts looking out for you first in a crowd and gets visibly upset when he can’t reach you

Walks you to and from class no matter if he misses the bell or if your class is on the opposite side of the school. He values every minute he has with you <33

Thinks about giving you goodbye kisses all the time and almost did it once but chickened out and you thought it was adorable

Sends you hella couple TikTok’s late at night

Loves when you squeeze him when you hug, it makes his heart race

Adores all your protective styles but after you sent him a picture of your hair after wash day he was inlove

Damn near fainted when you called him baby on FaceTime late at night

It was 10pm and you were listening to Rodrick recount his day of tormenting Gregory as usual, you were growing sleepy as you listened to his voice lull you to sleep. “He’s such a little shrimp I swear- are you getting tired?” You shook your head no and said, “I’m still up baby.” You giggled as you saw your boyfriends face grow flushed, “You okay? Babyy?” You always got a kick out of seeing Rodrick lose his cool and this moment was just too precious, “Mhm! Y-yeah I’m great, totally fine.”

When he saw you the next day he was determined to make you just as embarrassed, but despite his best efforts when he called you doll all you did was giggle and call him cute after pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Rodrick once left a shirt at your place when he snuck over one time and saw you in it on FaceTime without a bra on he damn near drooled.

ʚ 🍓ɞ FIRST COUPLE MONTHS

Starts to get more comfy, cuddles with you when you’re alone and rests his head on your chest with his arms wrapped around your torso

Play with his hair and he’s like mush on top of you

Can’t get enough of hearing you sing, he loves it when you hum a song mindlessly in his presence, he thinks it’s the cutest thing ever.

Calls you bunny/bun or pinky pie

Walked in on you in just a bra and shorts one time, you didn’t see him again for another 6 minutes.

Had your first kiss in an empty hallway at school, you kissed him first<33

Whenever you do your makeup he insists on watching especially if you wear eyeliner, he’ll sit on your bed like a lost puppy as he watches his pretty girl in adoration.

Kisses you again at his house after he saw you cry over a Disney movie, he called you pretty and held you close to his chest until you had to leave.

Listens to old school music with you late at night over the phone

Said I love you for the first time out of nowhere on the phone, you were so starstruck he came over to say it to your face. He got in trouble for it later but he didn’t care, hearing you say it back was more important.

You have your first makeout session in your bedroom when you were supposed to be studying, the v neck shirt you were wearing complimented your double d’s and showed off the chain that held Rodrick favorite ring he gifted you. You looked so effortlessly pretty, so when you gave him a kiss for getting a question right he went in for another..and another..until your lipliner was smudged and you sat breathless on his lap.

Surprise bear hugs from behind when he misses you

Kisses your neck and messes with your hands when he wants attention

Your voice, your touch, your smile has Rodrick in a choke hold and hopefully the promise ring he’s saving up for with his mom bucks will show you how much he truly loves you <33

[likedovesinthewindd]

SMILE, YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA !

in search of something, you find Rodrick's old camcorder in his room. | gif credit | fem!reader

"Where is it," you mumbled to yourself as you wearily dug through the piles of clothes and other clutter in Rodrick's permanently messy room. Every attempt you've made at trying to clean it has ended with you giving up after a while or the room returning to its original state in just a few days, so you've decided to give up completely.

"What're you looking for?" Rodrick asked as he busied himself scribbling in his notebook, no doubt some new idea for his bandmates. "My lipgloss," you answered, moving your search to his busted bedside drawer. It was hard to see what you were working with; the only real source of light coming from the ugly lava lamp and whatever other fairy lights or lamps he hoarded. "You're not gonna find it," he said matter-of-factly, looking at you as you stuck your arm as deep into the drawer's end to try and get a feel. "It's probably already—"

His thoughts were interrupted when you let out a small gasp, your eyes widening in excitement as you pulled something out of the drawer. "What is it?" he asked, thinking you might have found one of the magazines his mother had scolded him about, until he saw you pull out the old camcorder he used to terrorize his brother with.

"Do you think it still works?" you asked, searching for the small power button. He shrugged, shuffling towards the end of the bed and resting his back against the iron headboard. To your surprise, it did turn on, the LDC monitor catching the small specks of light all around the room. "It's still got some battery," you said, pointing the lens at your boyfriend. "How's about we make a movie?" you added with a smile, raising your eyebrows playfully.

"Ew," was all he said, and you couldn't help but laugh at the way his eyebrows scrunched at your faux suggestiveness. You placed your eye in the viewfinder and flicked the little 'start' button. The flash of the camera startled the both of you, and you laughed when you saw Rodrick's annoyed expression. "You not gonna crack a smile?" you asked softly. He was still scribbling in his notebook, deadset on not giving you the satisfaction of playing along. You huffed behind the camera, your unoccupied hand reaching out and raising his head by a grip you had on the sides of his face. He surprisingly complied and raised his head looking at you rather than at the camera's lense.

"There he is! My favourite boy! Isn't he the cutest?!" you laid it on thick, taking the hand that still held his face to squeeze his cheeks together, causing him to pout. In an awkward shift, you moved your body to sit right in Rodrick's lap, turning the camera around in your hand so that it was on both of you now. In an over-exaggerated motion, you placed a fat kiss right on the apple of his cheek before ending the recording. Once the bright light was no longer shining in his eyes, he let out a sigh of relief. You rolled your eyes before sparing him another kiss on the opposite cheek. "Big baby," you muttered playfully before moving from his lap to begin your search for the camera's charger, lipgloss long forgotten.

[aziawow]

being in love sucks (rodrick heffley x f!reader) 2.9k words

summary: you're in love with your best friend, but all he can talk about is heather hills.

warnings: language, discussions of loss of virginity of a minor (17), brief self sexualization

notes: she/her pronouns, no use of y/n. reblogs, comments, and likes appreciated! interact with me!

You’ve been friends with Rodrick your entire life. There isn’t a time you can’t remember without him being there. Your parents are lifelong friends and it was only natural that they raised you two together. There’s hundreds of pictures of you both in matching onesies, in the bath, at playdates, in your Halloween costumes, every first day of school, and so much more.

Your lives are so intertwined and have been from the very beginning that it was hard to tell where one began and the other ended. Out of everyone, you and Rodrick knew each other the best because you spent every second together and talked about anything and everything. Sometimes, you didn’t even need to do that to know.

You knew everything about each other.

Mostly everything, at least.

See, there was this thing. This one thing you kept secret from Rodrick for years. The longest you’ve ever kept a secret from him. The secret that could destroy your friendship of almost 18 years.

You’ve known Rodrick all your life and have been in love with him for half of it.

You’re not sure when the “love” part happened, but it hit you suddenly and all at once one day when you were 13.

Rodrick was doing something stupid and Rodrick-like, making you laugh and laugh and laugh until your insides hurt. When you settled down you looked at him. That’s all it took. Just one look. His eyes were dark and shining, a light you’d give everything to see on his face for as long as possible. You noticed his mouth, the way his big, pouty lips curved in the aftermath of a smile. And you knew.

You were totally gone for this boy.

You didn’t want to be the typical girl who fell in love with her boy best friend, but that’s what happened.

You weren’t immune to him and his charm, and no matter how much they pretend otherwise, neither were other girls you went to school with or random ones you saw in gas station lines late at night. Girls either liked him or they didn’t, and you felt like baring your teeth at everyone who crushed on him or flirted with him because jealousy isn’t a feeling you are exempt from, their infatuation is always brief, and they don’t know him—and never will—like you do.

At the same time, you wanted to wax poetic about Rodrick to those who thought he was a weird emo loser who would never get anywhere in life because they couldn’t be more wrong, and how could they not see the amazing guy right in front of them for who he is?

But you kept quiet. You silenced all the contrasting, confusing, and utterly stupid thoughts in your head and tried to move on.

You tried dating, never stuck with a guy for too long because either they hated Rodrick or Rodrick hated them. “You deserve the best kind of love, and he’s not it,” he’d say. And you’d think, “fuck” because he makes it so goddamn difficult not to love him. But he’s not an option, so forward you continue.

You had your firsts, and so did he, and the aches kept coming.

When you lost your virginity a few months ago (a stupid decision with someone you connected with in your history class just to get it over with) he grew quiet. Scarily, worryingly so. He asked a few questions—who was it, how far did you go, did he wear a condom, did you enjoy it, are you going to see him again? You answered his questions tentatively, not liking this mood shift.

The atmosphere in his room where you were (previously studying) was cold and tense, and you hesitated on your answer when he asked if it hurt. This was uncharted territory—how would he react to the truth? But because you promised to only save one secret for yourself, you told him the truth. When it came to Rodrick, lying was never easy.

It did hurt. At first anyway, and it took you a while to adjust to it. There was pain and pleasure and the guy was kind and gentle with you, and after you couldn’t walk for a good while. You were still sore during this conversation.

He was still quiet, though there was a spark of anger behind his eyes. He tried to hide it, but you know him too well for that. He got up and left the room for a few minutes. When he came back, he brought an ice pack, a towel, an extra pillow, and a bottle of ibuprofen. He gave it to you, face burning, and your heart skipped several beats as you were reminded of how sweet he can be.

You never discussed it again, and it’s like that day never happened. No hesitancy, no awkwardness. Just you and Rodrick. Best friends forever.

Now though, his newest obsession was getting on your nerves.

Heather Hills. Heather fucking Hills.

What were you compared to this beautiful prom queen that had Rodrick practically eating out of the palm of her hand? She’s everything Rodrick wants, and what else could you do about that? You tried being supportive of his crush (thinking of Heather being the love of his life made the ache grow stronger, so you chose not to think about it) but it was hard when Heather made it perfectly clear what she thought about Rodrick. But your sweet, naive, lovestruck best friend was too blinded by her shiny blonde hair and skin tight clothes to see the truth.

It was really annoying. Seriously. You’re not narcissistic, but your hair is fucking amazing even on bad days and you’ve been know to rock form fitting and revealing clothes from time to time. You had enough respect for yourself to dress how you like and not for boys, especially for Rodrick, but it would be nice if he noticed you for once.

Like, you didn’t custom make Löded Diper merch on a tight crop top that showed off your asset really well because you love the mispelt words for what happens when babies defecate displayed on your chest. You’re really supportive and just a bit hormonal, okay? Totally normal.

The thing is, you can deal with it when he says he made out with some girl under the bleachers or got a number from someone in his bio class (“How, Rodrick, you don’t even take biology!”) because they mean nothing to him. Just a one off to relieve stress.

Except, Heather Hills? This crush wasn’t going away anytime soon and you struggled to be okay with it.

Currently, you’re in his room, listening to an album of the latest indie band he found when he brought her up yet again. Just as you were really starting to get into the band, too.

“She is so beautiful, don’t you think?” You refuse, refuse, to glance over at him because if you saw the stars in his eyes you’re sure you’d throw up all over the clean laundry Susan had brought up for him a bit ago. You think, slightly vindictive, that at least she stopped folding his clothes for him and that he’s gonna lose his mind with that task later.

You “uh-huh” at him noncommittally and try to listen to the music.

He sighs, disgusting and dream-like. “Like, I know she wears makeup, and I’ve never seen her without it, but I just know her natural face is just as beautiful. Maybe even better. Definitely better, right?”

Jesus Christ.

You hum again.

“She always wears lip gloss, though. It makes her lips so glittery. I wonder what flavor it is. Cherry? Watermelon? Strawberry? I hope it’s strawberry.” You roll your eyes knowing he can’t see but hold in a sigh. You’ve been wearing strawberry lip gloss since you were, like, 10, which he would've known if ever paid any attention to your lips. “God, I want to kiss it off so bad,” he whines, and that, for some reason over all the others, is what breaks you.

“I have to go home,” you blurt and roll off his bed. You reach over to the music player, pop out the CD, and secure it in the case before stuffing it in your bag. You were gonna go home, enjoy the album, and maybe (probably) ((definitely)) have a good cry. What you were not going to do is sit there and listen to the boy you’re in love with declare it oh so passionately for another girl.

“Wait, what?” he asks, shooting to his feet. You make quick work of gathering your stuff and sliding on your shoes, ignoring him.

He follows you out his door and down the stairs, grabbing at you and asking you to slow down. You brush him off and repeat your excuse.

“Hey, wait. C’mon, what’s wrong? You're just gonna take my CD and dip?” He genuinely sounds upset, and you hate that it’s your fault, but you have to look after yourself.

“Yes,” you hiss, and you hear him make a sound so wounded and entirely unlike him that you stop just before reaching for the handle of the front door. You turn and face him, dying a little when you see his wet, confused eyes.

You try to say something, but Susan’s voice cuts in.

“Oh no, are you leaving? I just finished dinner! It’s barbeque chicken wings,” she sing-songs, and shit, it’s your favorite meal that Susan makes. It might even be your favorite meal ever. It has been since you were little and you and Rodrick had a food fight with the sauce. You got in so much trouble, but you wouldn’t give that memory for anything.

It was your favorite and Susan knew that. Rodrick knows that. Even Greg, who you had a good relationship with because you don’t tolerate Rodrick bullying him, and Frank, who couldn't be assed to pay attention to his sons unless they fucked up, knows it’s your favorite. It’s your favorite, but…

“I’m sorry, I have to go home. Next time, though,” you add after seeing the shock on their faces.

“What is wrong with you?”

“Rodrick!” Susan scolds.

“One minute we’re fine then the next you don’t want to be around me,” and no, your heart does not break a little more hearing the crack in his voice, absolutely not. “I’m so lost. What’s wrong?”

Something in you snaps. It’s the something holding back the secret you’ve kept from him for years and all the other tiny secrets buried within that one. It’s the something in you that aches, and you just want it to stop.

“You are!” You practically yell at him. Now it’s out, everything else escapes too, whether you want it too or not. “Heather Hills is! You can’t go five minutes without bringing her up! It’s actually kind of pathetic how gone on her you are. She won’t give you the time of day no matter how hard you try. She doesn’t care about you or your music and she thinks you’re a loser and you know that but you’ve successfully deluded yourself into thinking she sees you as anything more than a walking Hot Topic advertisement. That is, if she even knows you exist.”

The look on Rodrick’s face as you rant turns to shock then to a kind of sadness you’ve never seen on him before. You see in real time as you break his heart, but he broke yours first, so the pain between you is shared like everything else.

He tries to speak but you cut him off. “I know you exist. I care about you and your passions. I am probably one of the only people in this world who believes in your dream of having a music career and supports it.”

“What does that have to do with Heather?” he asks, and you want to scream.

“You once told me that I deserve the best kind of love, do you remember that?” He nods. “So do you. That is something I believe in strongly, and I can’t pretend Heather is what you deserve. She doesn’t know you, she doesn’t see you. I’m not going to go on feeding into this fantasy you have because I can’t watch this thing you have with her anymore.”

He opens and closes his mouth a few times, looking frustratingly cute as he does so. He shakes his head.

“I don’t understand. Why can’t you watch?”

“Because it hurts, Rodrick! It hurts me and I can’t stop it.” You sigh and tear your gaze away from him. You think back on your shared past, the jokes, the situations, the good, the bad. Every memory pours in, and you know you ruined what was left of forever. Tears spring to your eyes.

“I can’t do this,” you say quietly, “I really can’t.”

Rodrick stays frozen in place as you open the door and leave. He stands there even after you’re gone.

“Wow,” says an irritating voice next to him. “You’re an idiot.”

“Greg! Don’t talk about your brother like that, he’s clearly going through something!” Rodrick, who can’t feel much of anything right now, feels a smidge grateful for his scolding mother. Until— “Except, Rodrick, honey. You are being a little bit of an idiot.”

He whirls around, hope for everything completely gone.

“What are you talking about?” he asks, and when the only response he gets is his mom and Greg sharing a look with a meaning Rodrick can’t define, he loses it.

“What just happened? What does she mean ‘I can’t do this’ and why did she bring up Heather a million times? She refused barbeque chicken! She loves barbecue chicken! What is with that!?” he sits at the table and groans. “I’m so confused. Nothing in this world makes sense.”

“Oh my god, Rodrick, are you serious? I know you’re kinda dumb but you can't seriously be that oblivious,” Greg says.

“What,” Rodrick bites.

“I’m gonna tell you this, not because you’re my brother and I love you, but because the best thing about your life just walked out that door and I don’t want to risk her never coming back.”

“Tell me what,” Rodrick grounds out.

Greg sighs, very much put upon and done with stupid teenagers. “Dude, she’s in love with you.”

Rodrick stops. His whole world comes to a standstill. He can’t think, he can’t breathe, he can't be. That’s not true, right? His little brother is just yanking his chain. Pay back for when Rodrick let Greg believe he used his toothbrush to scrub the toilet bowl last week. Just a prank. A joke.

Right?

Because if it’s not…

“How do you know that?” he asks, and hates how small his voice is.

“How do you not?” Greg retorts.

The rest of dinner is spent in silence, only broken occasionally by Manny, but Rodrick doesn't even make it halfway through. He’s too busy thinking about you and what to do. He sat with his thoughts and absentmindedly started to eat a piece of chicken, but found he couldn’t even take a bite without every memory you two shared filling his every sense. He abruptly leaves the table and suspects the only his mom let him skip family dinner is because he had a great fucking excuse.

This, to him, is life changing news. The most important news he’s ever gotten and will probably ever get. This is something he has to consider, and consider very seriously or he’s screwed forever. The decision is so easy to make.

You're in love with him.

Him, though? Christ, of course he loves you back. How can he not? Heather is whatever, a distraction, something fun, but you? You’re his whole world, you’re forever.

Time to get his girl.

***

There’s a tiny clink at your window. You thought you imagined it at first but it happened again. And again. And again. It kept happening until—

“Rodrick!” You whispered-shout, half hanging out your window. You’re on the first floor, and right in his face. Whoops. “Knock it off, you’ll wake my parents up!”

“Sorry!” he whisper-shouts back. He takes in what you look like, rumpled clothes, red eyes, and tear stained cheeks. “Hey, have you been crying?” He decides fuck it, and leans close to you and takes your face in his hands. He’s gentle, so you let him. Distantly, he can hear the stolen CD playing behind you.

He wipes away the tears and crust, and when he’s done, he brings your foreheads together. You close your eyes.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for not seeing it before,” he apologies softly.

You let out a gentle huff. “The only secret I’ve ever kept from you,” you admit. He chuckles lightly, you can feel his breath on your skin and you shiver. Your heart beat is wild, always wild around him. But there’s a sense of calm and peace between you two now, and you don’t feel nervous. With him, you feel safe and content, even now after everything.

He pulls back and you open your eyes.

“God,” he says, breathless. “I’m so fucking in love with you.”

And the way he looks at you right now, in this moment, tells you everything you need to know. He never looked at Heather like this, not at any girl except you. He would never lie to you. Hope and love and longing soar through your entire body.

Your eyes are wet and your heart is full. “I love you too.”

When you kiss, it’s everything.

He pulls back abruptly, eyes wide. “Strawberry?” he asks, voice in awe.

“Shut up,” you say, and pull him in for another kiss.

[bouncybongfairy]

Opposites Attract

Rodrick Heffley x Fem Reader

Summary: One Friday after school, you are trying to practice for an important audition coming up. As you start, you suddenly hear an obnoxiously loud drumming coming from next door. After arguing back and forth for a while, it becomes clear that neither of you is budging. You desperately need this rehearsal time and ask him what it will take to get the peace and quiet you need. He tells you he'll stop if you let him take you on a date tomorrow to the Drive-In tomorrow night.

Word Count: 2k+

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

You were sitting in the last period, trying to get some homework done. It was Friday and you could tell everyone was itching for the weekend to start. Once you noticed that you only had 5 minutes until the bell rang, you started packing your bag up. Unlike most students, you had to stay after school and rehearse for your 1st chair violin position on Monday. You grabbed a tissue and cleaned your glasses, watching the clock as time dragged by. Once the bell rang, you stayed seated until most of your peers exited. You would just be waiting as kinds shoved their way through the small opening. After the doorway was less crowded you made your way to the E-wing where the music room was located. You were close with your orchestra teacher and she would let you stay after class in order to get a little practice in. It was nice to have the entire room to yourself, you took your violin out of the case and started tuning. After you had rosined your bow, you started practicing when you heard an off-rhythm drumming. At first, you were trying to ignore it, unfortunately, you would find yourself focusing on the drumming while counting rests. Eventually, you couldn’t take it so you packed your violin up and tried to find where the music was coming from. 

You went into the theater and saw someone banging away at a drum set that was placed in the middle of the stage. You immediately recognized the drummer as Rodrick Heffley. He had certainly made a reputation for himself this year, getting caught spray painting the side of the school; doing donuts in the parking lot, and of course, you knew he smoked. He was sweating and his shaggy hair was sticking to his forehead. His eyebrows were furrowed because of how much he was exerting himself. He was really lanky but his arms were toned, mostly likely due to how much he plays. He was wearing an Arctic Monkeys t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up and black skinny jeans. His backpack, which was covered in buttons and pins, was sitting next to the drum kit. He reached down to pull a water bottle and took a drink. His head was tilted up and a couple of water droplets were running down his throat. You walked passed the aisle of seats and approached him, when he noticed you he immediately paused. 

“I’m really trying to practice and I can barely hear myself think over your banging,” you said crossing your arms. 

“Well, what do you want me to do about that? I’m trying to practice too, you know,” he said. 

“I have an audition this Monday and I really need to be 100% focused during this practice,” you explained. 

“I have a gig next Friday and also need some quiet time,” he said. 

“If I give you 10 bucks will you please let me practice?” you proposed.

“Actually I have a better idea, what if we went out tomorrow night? We can go see the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie at the Drive-In,” he said. 

“Really? Do you even know my name?” you huffed. 

“Y/N. I would ask you if you know mine but I’m pretty sure you do,” he said, smirking at you.

“Well then, can I give you my number?” you asked. 

“Sure can,” he said. You climbed up on stage and grabbed a pen out of your jacket pocket. You grabbed his hand and wrote your number on his hand. 

He thanked you and then you quickly made your way back to the music room. You continued on with practicing but were now preoccupied with thinking about what you just agreed to. Not having much experience with dating, you felt a little nervous. Rodrick seemed so confident with talking to girls, that was part of the reason you liked him. You just didn’t want to come off as naive or clueless. Eventually, you come to the conclusion that you can no longer focus on the music and have your mom come to pick you up. The entire car ride and even once you got home you couldn’t get your mind off him. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him attractive. He just had that bad-boy vibrato that only certain guys have. Not to mention you two completely and utterly fit the trope of the sweet girl with the bad boy stereotype. Most of your friends, especially the ones that you took orchestra with, always talked down on metal or angsty music. You, on the other hand, felt differently. Music that isn’t your taste isn’t bad music and most people your age couldn’t seem to grasp that. All your friends saw him as a grimy skater boy but what was wrong with that? You even asked them why they would be ashamed to be like the guys their famous idols pretend to be. Getting tired of the anxiety thinking about tomorrow was causing you to wash up and head to bed. 

The next day you start getting ready around 6:30 pm. You were sitting on the floor of your bedroom, in front of a mirror that was propped against the wall. Separating your hair into layers you slowly began flat ironing. You had gotten a text from Rodrick that said he was going to pick you up around 8. Although you still had some anxiety, you were really excited. This was going to be your first date and the fact that it was with someone you were so attracted to made it that much. It took you 10 minutes to get your left lash to stick but you were finally done with your make-up. You changed into a jean skirt, a black v-neck, and a white sweater. By the time you were fully done, he texted you that he was on the way. You practically jumped out of your skin when you read it. You felt like your blood was running hot and cold at the same time. Your mom gave you 20 dollars and a kiss on the cheek before she left. When you walked outside your house, the first thing you noticed was his van. It also smelt like his cologne but not in an overwhelming way. You knew he had a band but you didn’t realize it was named Loaded Diper. Practically skipping down the driveway you climb into the front seat. The first thing you noticed was the A.C. being on blast, you were also surprised by how clean everything was. 

“Hey,” you greeted him. 

“Hi, you look really pretty,” he said, which made you blush. 

“Thanks, so are you excited to see the new TMNT movie? I heard it got really good reviews,” you said. 

“For sure, I’ve been looking forward to it for a while,” he said. 

You drove in comfortable silence up until you got to the Drive-In. You offered to pay but he ignored you and your pleas. Once he found a spot in the back, the two of you made your way to the snack bar. It was a vintage 60’s theme which you thought was cool. There were records hung on the call, all the booths were cherry red and the floor had a checkered pattern. As you waited in line, Rodrick put his arms around your shoulder which made your stomach flip. You were surprised by how much he ordered. Seriously, you hoped he wasn’t expecting help. You helped him carry everything back: nachos, popcorn, fresh chocolate chip cookies, two slurpees, and two hotdogs. When he parked, he turned the van around so that the back doors were facing the screen. He opened the doors and you were actually surprised by how much effort he put into it. There was a thick layer of blankets stacked on the floor of the van. Several pillows lined up against the driver and passenger seats. A small battery-powered lantern was hung from the center of the ceiling. There were stickers all over the interior of the car which made you smile. It looked so cute and cozy. You slipped your shoes off and climbed into the back with him. You were nervous, to the point where your teeth were chattering a little. The trailers that played before the movie were still running; he had already eaten half his nachos. 

“Where do you put all that?” you joked. 

“We’ll never know,” he said. 

“Are you nervous?” he asked, pointing to your legs that were shaking a bit. 

“A little, I’ve never been on a date before,” you admitted, taking a sip from your Slurpee. 

“Since we’re sharing secrets, you’re the first girl that actually said yes when I asked. Even then you only did it to rehearse,” he said, wiping his mouth with a napkin. 

“After I gave you my number, I only practiced for like 15 minutes because it was all I could think about,” you said. 

“Really?” he asked, genuinely surprised.

“What is so unbelievable?” you asked. 

“I don’t know, I guess I just didn’t think I was your type,” he confessed. 

“That’s fair, we don’t necessarily run with the same crowd. I have to admit though, usually all the guys I’m around are scared to get a bit of dirt under their fingernails. It’s not like I seek trouble but I really like you, your style, taste in music, and demeanor you know?” you said. 

He was blushing really hard, looking down so that his hair covered his eyes. You could still see his smirk though, it made you feel giddy knowing you had this effect on him. He pulled a pen out of his pocket, at first you questioned whether he should be smoking when he had to drive home. He reassured you that he had a high tolerance and that the effects would wear off by the time the movie ended. You were really nervous, especially because you’d never smoked before. He took a couple of hits to show you how to properly inhale. He also reassured you that if you didn’t want to or didn’t want him to smoke then it was okay. This warmed your heart, knowing that he didn’t want you to feel pressured. You grabbed his hand, feeling too insecure to hold it yourself. You took a big hit and then coughed it out, the smoke burning your throat. He laughed as you took a huge drink of your Slurpee to help the stinging sensation. After taking one or two more hits, you could feel it kicking in. You couldn’t stop giggling which was amusing to Rodrick.

“Now I understand how you can eat all this food,” you said while taking a big bite of a hotdog. 

“Your eyes are so red,” he laughed. 

“Really?” you asked, grabbing your phone and looking at your appearance. 

“Can we take a selfie together?” you asked, he nodded his head yes. 

You scooted closer to him and took a selfie with your back camera with flash. When you showed Rodrick he was impressed with how well they came out. After that, he started talking to you about what his plans were for his band. You were surprised with how far ahead he had thought into the future; you know, about what type of label he wanted to be signed to and merch that he wanted to design. You told him about how you wanted to make movie scores and he thought it was really cool. It was now completely dark and the movie was starting. You covered your legs with the blanket and turned to face Rodrick. He had just taken a hit and blew the small hit into your face. You playfully inhaled which made him laugh, you then kissed his cheek. He turns and smiles at you before giving you a quick peck on the lips. After you cuddle up to him, resting your head on his shoulder, and start enjoying the movie. o

[moonlit-imagines]

warnings:

a/n:

requested by anonymous

“Dude, can I tell you something? Like, serious shit.” You stopped playing your guitar as you stood in his garage at a one on one band practice. You were just in a great mood from jamming out with your best friend and thought maybe it was time to say something.

“Yeah, go for it.” Rodrick set down his drumsticks and stared at you with a goofy expression, a smile and eyes so wide you knew he was paying attention, it was obvious he cared what you had to say.

“So like, we’ve been friends since, what? Like, the second grade?” You watched Rodrick nod in agreement, waiting for your point. “I love you to death, man.” You said, which wasn’t unnatural. You guys genuinely did love each other. “It’s just like, I really love you. Like, I’ve wanted to be with you for a while, I guess. I just don’t wanna mess up all this.” You lightly strummed your guitar as a joke and his smile had barely changed. He hadn’t said anything and it was making you nervous. That attentive stare felt empty for a few moments, then he laughed out loud and your heart sank.

“Well, duh.” Rodrick stood up from his drum stool and began to walk back and forth for a moment. “I’ve wanted that since forever ago. I also didn’t wanna mess this up.” He tapped one of his drums with his finger a few times and looked over to you. “I’m down for this, always have been. Just say the word.”

taglist: @volturi-stuff // @randomawesomeperson102 // @queen-destenie // @thatwaspossesion // @pappydaddy // @hargreevesz // @emilysprentisss // @ravenmoore14 // @wonderful-writer // @augustvandyne // @summersimmerus // @simsrecs // @xoxobabydolls // @wild-rose-35 // @petersgroupie // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @elenavampire21 //

[mozzarella-stickz]

Lovers Rock: Rodrick Heffley x F! Reader

Author’s Note: Special thanks to @celootaku1 for telling me I should write this :) Hope you enjoy! Sorry it’s like months late though…

Summary: A panic attack in the school cafeteria leads to a chance encounter with none other than Rodrick Heffley.

Warnings: anxiety, panic attacks, probably OOC Rodrick don’t hate me. Otherwise lots of fluff <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were certain this was the worst day of your life.

As soon as you woke up, the impending doom of the day seemed to loom over your head, your brain repeating over and over how bad today was. Your head felt fuzzy and confused, your body shaky and riddled with random jolts of anxiety.

It all came to a climax during lunch time, when the smells, sounds, and godawful fluorescent lights of the cafeteria all become to much for you, and you bolted. You grabbed your lunchbox, excusing yourself from your table, and bolting out to your car in the parking lot. The school was well aware of your condition, and all you had to do was nod and they let you out.

You slammed your door shut, the panic setting in. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. Your breathing cycled over and over, rounds of seconds of holding and exhaling.

Unbeknownst to you, was the guy sitting in the van parked right next to you. Rodrick Heffley had decided he did not want to go so Spanish that day, instead choosing to take a nap in the back of the van. He was rudely awakened however, by slamming doors and the loud beeping of the car’s lock system.

“Jesus Christ,” he groaned, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

Rodrick climbed to the front of the van, looking at his window at the commotion. He noticed you sitting in your front seat, breathing in and out as tears flowed down your cheeks, smearing your mascara down your face. He felt a little bad now, panic attacks were something he’d dealt with a lot in middle school. He took a deep breath, opening his van door, and knocking on your window gently. You jolted up, and he winced. You took another deep breath in, before rolling your window down.

“H-hi?” you said, voice weak and shaky. You were absolutely confused as to why Rodrick Heffley was knocking on your window, much less doing so in a nice way.

“You okay?” he asked, shuffling a little as he leaned down to your window.

“Not really,” you sniffled, wiping your eyes.

“Do you want to talk?”

“There’s really nothing. I had a panic attack over nothing.”

Awkward silence between you both. Rodrick because he wasn’t quite sure what to say, and you because while you appreciated his concern, you really did not feel like talking at that moment.

“I can go if you want…”

“No!”

Rodrick looked at you, slightly puzzled. It didn’t seem like you wanted him to be there, but your outburst was strange.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to yell, I just…”

“Nah, I get it.”

“You can get in if you want.”

Rodrick opened your car door, sliding into the passenger seat. You leaned your head back into your seat, continuing your breathing slowly and gently.

Rodrick sat, watching you. You were always such a fun-loving person, caring and kind, smiling like nothing was ever wrong.

Your heart started to settle down and your head cleared slightly. You checked your phone, seeing a few texts from your friends asking if you were alright. You smiled, but set it down. You would reply later.

“Thanks for sitting here,” you said, turning towards Rodrick. “I really appreciate the concern.”

“Yeah, anytime. You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, just sometimes I wake up with the worst feelings of anxiety for no reason. Today was one of those days. Cafeteria was just too much today.”

“I get it. In middle school, I used to get super anxious all the time. But my way of coping was just to not care, I guess.”

“I wish it was that easy.”

“It was hard, but that’s when I started to drum too. Helped me with the nerves and shit.”

You giggled a little, wiping your eyes. You pulled down your mirror, groaning at the raccoon eyes look you were pulling off right now.

“I’m a mess!”

“Hey, no worries, I have an idea.”

Rodrick bolted, rushing into the front seat of his van for something. After a few minutes of sifting through not done homework and fast food bags, he grabbed a small bag. Sitting back down in the seat, he opened it and pulled out an eyeliner pencil. You cocked your head, looking at him with a “what the fuck” look.

“I wear it for gigs sometimes. I carry it around just in case any pretty girls need it.”

Your heart fluttered at that comment.

“Close your eyes,” he said. You obliged, tilting towards him. He lined it around the top of your eyes, smudging it a little with his fingers.

“Okay, open.”

You did, and then he drew a small line underneath the bottom of the rim of your eye. Taking his pinky, he smudged it, wiping away the flakes of mascara along with it.

“Alright, done.”

You flicked your mirror down, examining his work. You smiled in astonishment, you looked wicked cool and totally smudged on purpose.

“I love it!” You squealed. “I look awesome! Thank you so much!”

“Anytime.”

You sat in silence, examining it. You looked so…not you, and it was so sick. You checked your phone again, seeing it was almost time for lunch to end.

“Crap, I gotta go,” you said, sighing. Instead of pocketing your phone, you handed it to Rodrick in a bold move.

“Can I get your number?” you asked, “Just in case?”

“Huh…oh OH yeah, um of course!”

You giggled again at his shock, handing him your phone as he put his number in. Rodrick handed your phone back, his hands so shaky it was endearing.

“Thanks again, Rodrick. See you soon.”

You exited your car, bolting back inside. Rodrick shut your car, staring at you walking inside. See you soon. His heart fluttered a little, something that hadn’t happened since Heather Hills sat next to him in class several years ago.

Later that evening, Rodrick felt his phone ping in his pocket, picking it up he read a text from your presumed number.

Attachment: 1 image.

He opened it to see a picture of you holding an eyeliner pencil in the makeup section with a smile on your face.

Another text from you that said:

had to get my own since i looked so cool! thanks again <3

His heart fluttered again, this time at an alarming rate. He typed out a response, palms sweaty and hands once again shaking like a leaf in the wind.

of course, pretty girl <3

From the other end of the phone, you felt faint. You set your phone down, letting your brain formulate a response. You typed it down, breathing in and out before sending:

do you want to hang out this weekend?

[reareaotaku]

:00

I saw that you wanted to write for Rodrick Heffley!!

I need to take a peek into ur brain and see what headcanons you have for him plz

I actually have written for him: Here But here's more on him [Imagine if I did the 'Newer' Rodrick]

You caught this man's eye and he's obsessed

He playfully teases you, much to your annoyance, but it's his way of flirting

He cleans the garage before you come over and cleans himself up

"Wow, you put together really nicely, Rodrick"

If he sees you at church or something, he avoids you, because his mother is around and he knows if his mom even THINKS he likes a girl, she'll embarrass him

He's on his best behavior around you and Greg picks up on this and uses it to his advantage

Greg mentions how his mom should invite your family to dinner [He does this, because he knows mom loves having people over]

Rodrick is helping his mom clean the house and their dad, Frank, is very suspicious about what Rodrick is doing

"Don't want them thinking we're slobs, right?"

Frank keeps a close eye on Rodrick, especially since Susan agreed with Rodrick and told Frank to help

Rodrick laughs at all your dad's jokes, even if he doesn't understand them

Everyone gives him a weird look, expect your dad

Your dad officially loves him, which is strange, because your father hated Rodrick, thinking he was a drug dealing satan supporter or something

Your cautious around Rodrick, because he does give you drug dealer vibes

He likes when you wear his shirts; God, you look so good

You make him really giddy and nervous

You change him. Like he'll skip out on parties to be with you

He'll go to your job, using Greg as an excuse to go there

[satansapostle6]

Kids | Rodrick Heffley

Spotify Playlist Link

Rodrick Heffley becomes obsessed when he finally meets his thirty-five year old band mate, Bill Walter’s, younger sister.

Warnings: Mature themes/language. Drug use. Violence. Almost smut. Choking. Semi-public. Knee riding.

“The Angel From My Nightmare”

“10 Things I Hate About You”

“Alright, go have fun. Come get me if you need something,” Sara told her younger brother.

“Do you have to stay?” Connor complained as she and Lauren sat at a table.

“Sorry, kiddo. We gotta have fun too,” she teased. “Go. Have fun. We’ll be all the way over here, you won’t even know we’re here.”

That turned out to be completely wrong.

“It’s super crowded in here… Even Heather Hills and her friends are here tonight,” Lauren observed.

“Ew. She puts the ‘bully’ in bulimic,” Sara muttered.

“Yeah, even I’m not that far in denial,” Lauren agreed, turning as everyone noticed a loud feedback coming off of the DJ’s microphone.

The music stopped, and no one knew what was happening.

“Alright, enough of that,” Rodrick Heffley’s voice blasted over the speakers, replacing the music that had been playing.

Everyone at the roller rink stopped to see that he and the rest of the band had set up near the DJ booth, completely hijacking the music.

“Oh my God,” Lauren whispered, looking to Sara. “Did you know about this?”

“No,” Sara hissed, looking at Rodrick in horror.

“We are Löded Diper, and we’re here to blow your minds,” Bill joined in.

“Oh my fucking God,” Sara murmured, trying her best to blend into the crowd as she scooted as far down the bench as possible.

But she quickly found that anonymity definitely wouldn’t be in the cards for her tonight.

“I’m Rodrick. Rodrick Heffley,” a shaky voice breathed into the mic.

“Hurry up!” someone’s dad yelled, more irritated about not hearing music than the whole music hijacking situation.

“Alright, uh… I’m here to sing one song. It’s a very special song, that goes out to a very special girl. Sara? Sara Walter?” Rodrick desperately searched the crowd for her.

He eventually found her, staring right at her as everyone in the roomed stared, including Heather Hills and the other ‘popular’ girls. Sara’s eyes widened with rage as her little brother and his friends all stared in her direction.

“Sara,” Rodrick stared, his eyes full of fear. “I… I’m sorry. You’re the prettiest, smartest girl in the world.”

Sara’s face went pale as she slowly turned to Lauren with all eyes on her.

“What the fuck?” she mouthed silently.

It seemed no one had anything to offer.

“Sara, I know you’re probably mad at me, and you probably should be. You’re beautiful, and you’re kind, and I don’t deserve you,” he blurted out as everyone watched.

Heather and her friends were now whispering and pointing in disgust.

“Listen, Sara, I get it if you never wanna talk to me again… But I really, really like you,” Rodrick announced in front of the entire building.

“Get on with it already!” another impatient onlooker shouted.

“Right, yeah, here goes,” he continued, rambling as he signaled to the band to start playing. “This song is for you, Sara Walter.”

Bill waved to her excitedly, completely unable to read the room as he tried to make the situation less intense. She watched, completely frozen as the band started playing. It was a bit rocky in the first few seconds, but then, she immediately recognized the song after the first few chords.

Struck by the effort that went into coordinating the entire thing, Sara could hardly control her racing thoughts. She didn’t know whether to be angry at Rodrick for the spectacle, or charmed by the gesture, or creeped out by the entire thing.

“And I’d give up forever to touch you…” the sixteen year old boy sang shakily in front of the crowd, his vocals questionable at best.

“'Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now,”

Some people in the room, namely Heather’s group, laughed and whispered as Rodrick took the stage. Eventually, the teasing throughout the room got to be brutal, but he still persisted, trying his best not to break.

“God, he’s an idiot, but I still feel kinda bad,” Sara murmured.

“Sara. I’m gonna be completely honest with you,” Lauren raised an eyebrow. “You need to go kiss that boy right now.”

“Seriously? I’m just gonna run back into his arms because he made a fool of himself for me?” she reasoned. “That’s his whole brand!”

“Sara,” Lauren reminded her, her approach stern but caring. “Would Jake Anderson ever have performed your favorite slow song for you in a room full of people, even if his singing was pretty dog shit?”

Sara sat in silence for a moment as everyone still looked over at her, trying to gauge her reaction.

“What about Tyler Hayden? Or Lenwood Heath?”

“Okay, I get your point,” Sara said softly.

“I haven’t seen anybody give this much of a fuck for you since you were with Nadine,” Lauren admitted. “And you know how much I liked you guys.”

“Yeah,” Sara thought, considering her options.

“I think he really means what he says. Even if he’s fucking stupid,” Lauren told her.

Sara just sighed, looking up at Rodrick on the platform as he sang for her, never taking his eyes off her even once. It was the only thing keeping him grounded.

“And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am,”

He sang like his life depended on it, which it kind of did. As much as Sara hated to admit it, she saw a look of genuine regret in his eyes that day. All she could think about was how much she really did like Rodrick, all the way until the end of the song.

It ended and a complete silence washed over the room, as just about everyone just stood around waiting for a resolution. Even security had been waiting until the spectacle was over to intervene. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, but it was the first time that yielded any interesting results.

Of course, Heather and her friends wouldn’t stop whispering, but Rodrick refused to pay them any mind. He cleared his throat as the song ended, staring out at Sara with a sad, dopey look in his eyes as he prayed she’d forgive him.

“Fuck it,” Sara muttered to herself, walking out onto the rink.

She marched up to the platform looking both angry and confused. Rodrick didn’t know what to expect, and slowly stepped down in shock. He stood right in front of her, walking up to her as he waited for her to react to him in some way.

“I’m sorry,” he started to apologize, “I didn’t know how to make it up to you—”

“I don’t care,” she said finally, a resolve in her eyes.

“What does that mean?” Rodrick asked, ignoring the girls who were pointing and making fun.

“That means, fuck it, Rodrick Heffley, I’m really starting to like you too.”

Rodrick’s grunt of surprise was muffled into a spontaneous kiss as Sara jumped into his arms, which was met with a mostly positive reaction from their audience. He was hesitant at first, slowly warming up to her again as he scooped her up in his arms, kissing her lips like he’d never get the chance to again.

After a moment, they remembered where they were, and Rodrick awkwardly set her down on the ground with reluctance. He looked up and down nervously, not sure what to say now.

“Can we go?” Sara asked, uncomfortable as she looked around.

“Yes,” he nodded automatically, willing to comply to her every whim, “Yes. We can.”

After being kicked out of the roller rink, again, Rodrick and the rest of the band walked out to the parking lot, reviewing their performance that night.

“You know, I know we’re metal and all, but that was fucking beautiful,” Ben seemed to be teary-eyes.

Rodrick and Sara stepped outside for a moment, as she leaned against the wall in silence, trying to think. Knowing what might comfort her, Rodrick pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, opening it as he offered it to her. Nodding appreciatively at the gesture, Sara took one and held it in her mouth as he lit it for her.

“I’m sorry,” Rodrick blurted out finally, a pained but far away expression on his face, “I, uh… I didn’t know how else to show you I meant what I said. That I really, really like you.

“It’s okay,” Sara sighed, just hoping to move on from the issue, “I understand. Really. We all backtrack. I’m over it.”

“No, really. I don’t want you to think I made a scene just to distract from the way I acted,” he said slowly. “I really meant what I said—”

“Rodrick,” she said, eyes wide open, “It’s fine. It’s done. I’m over it.”

“No, I owe you an explanation,” he sighed, “I… I’ve just never had a real girlfriend before…”

“Dude, this isn’t exactly breaking news,” she looked at him with dead eyes.

“Okay, can you just not be a total fucking asshole for like one second?” Rodrick demanded with laughter.

“Okay, fine,” she threw her hands up in surrender, “I’m listening.”

The look on her face was less than convincing.

“You’re a bitch,” Rodrick laughed, no longer able to take himself seriously, “You’re a fucking bitch,” he pointed at her, his finger less than an inch from her face.

“Oh yeah?” she teased with a light chuckle, cigarette butt dropped to the ground and forgotten.

“Yeah.”

He stood in front of her, trying to remain serious as he leaned against the wall, his hand resting just above her head.

“You’re a fucking bitch,” he repeated playfully, trying to perfect his more serious demeanor.

“Am I a bitch, or are you just a little bitch?” Sara proposed, intentionally provoking him.

“No. You’re just a bitch,” he promised her.

Neither were sure exactly how it happened, but as he got in her face and challenged her, he attempted to jokingly pin her to the wall. At first, this entailed his arm resting on her chest, but then suddenly turned into something else entirely.

Rodrick didn’t intend it at all, but suddenly, the both of them found his hand slipped as he held her by the throat, still grinning.

“You’re such a fucking bitch,” he told her, before coming to and realizing that he was actually choking her.

First, his eyes fluttered as he realized the mistake he’d made, but once he saw he’d reaction, he felt himself giving into it.

“Fuck,” he moaned out loud, his finger pads pressing on her pressure points harder.

She softly sighed in excitement, the contact with the pressure points heightening the experience even more. Rodrick looked at her with pleading eyes as he choked her, admiring her gratuitously.

He leaned in to kiss her, groaning into her mouth as he pressed her against the wall with his large hand wrapped around her neck. She reacted by pulling him in by the collar, making him feel something even more euphoric. She deepens the kiss, tongue slipping into his mouth as he slowly moved his leg up her body, not stopping until his knee trailed down to her center.

For just a moment, he stopped kissing Sara, huffing softly into the warm skin of her neck.

“Is it bad that I kinda wanna see you fuck my knee right now?” he wondered.

“Yeah,” she nodded. “And it’s hot.”

He chuckled happily as he sucked on her neck, roughly biting and sucking. He pushed his knee against her, practically fucking her with it against the wall behind the roller rink. She quietly groaned in frustration as she tried to align herself perfectly on his knee.

“You’re so fucking hot,” he gasped, eyes closed as he kissed all over her neck. “I hope you know you could ask me for anything. I’d do anything for you, or to you.”

“You’re so sexy,” Sara whined.

“I’m serious. If you wanted me to, I’d eat it from the back, and enjoy it,” he said completely deadpan. “All I wanna do is take you home and lay you down and make you come any way I know how.”

“We should probably stop this,” Sara thought intuitively, “Before this wall ends up pregnant.”

“I can’t control myself when I’m around you. And not cuz I think you’re hot,” Rodrick stated. “Honestly. I just see you and I wanna give you everything.”

“You already have,” she confessed, never having seen anyone so willing to risk things for her.

-

A/N: not sure if this is good, wrote it after doing a line

-

[sunnysoulzz]

Hey sunnyyyyy😋can we get the girl next door crush trope with Rodrick heffley headcannons

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS IS BUT FUCK YEAH

(I’m ngl- I’m very uncultured I had to look up what the girl next door trope was) (also this made me realise idk how to make headcanons)

Contains: rodrick Heffley x f!reader, nsfw, reader and rodrick are neighbours and childhood friends lol, more rodrick accidentally perving on reader, smut under the cut!

You and Rodrick had been friends since childhood. you were neighbours. When you were little you used to always play together, he had a habit of being a bully sometimes.

As you grew up you stayed friends, not as close as you were when you were little, but still close. When he’d get mad at his dad or something, he’d come to your house. He’d talk about music, school, girls he had a crush on. You’d just smile and listen.

He never really saw you as ‘dateable’. You were always just his close friend who he’d go to for comfort, and when he needed someone to talk to.

The two of you would drive around in his van, listening to music, or get snacks together. He’d always tell you about songs his band was working on.

He’s the kind to make you a mixtape of your favourite songs, you face felt hot after he handed it to you.

He definitely throws his arm over your shoulder when he’s walking with you

One day one of your neighbours had a party, your family and rodricks family were both invited. You wore a short skirt and a cute top. That was the first time Rodrick really saw you as a woman. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you, he has a goofy smile as he tried to act cool, his ears tinted red.

After that he realised how much he liked you, even before this, when he would adamantly refuse that he liked you, he definitely did. He’d always try to make you laugh, he thought the way you talked was cute, he’d try to impress you when he played drums, and way more embarrassing stuff he doesn’t want to admit.

Rodrick having a crush on you would 100% mean he’d invite you to every practice and the few places that let his band play. He’d call you his personal roadie lol.

He’d sneak out of the house at night to go to yours, he’d say it was because he was pissed off about something, but really he just wanted to see you.

You’d bring him to your room, trying not to wake your parents, even though they were used to rodrick coming over at random times by now. You talked about hearing a song he would’ve liked, humming the song softly. He immediately blushed, not just because he liked hearing your voice, but also because you thought of him.

You loved how dorky he was, even though he tried to act cool, he really wasn’t.

He never planned to confess, he didn’t want to ruin the friendship and was hoping the crush would just die down overtime, it didn’t. He was talking about you to his friends, yet again, when you showed up at his house unannounced and caught him talking about everything he loves about you. He has never been more embarrassed. He tried to pretend he was talking about another girl while he friends just exchanged knowing glances.

He definitely accidentally perved on you on when you were getting out of the shower.

Rodrick thought you were innocent, he hadn’t seen you bring any guys over, at least none he thought you were hooking up with. And since he’s a virgin too, he really wanted his first time to be with you.

He definitely thinks about you whenever he jerks off :]

You know that whole trope of “accidentally looking though a girls window when she’s changing”? That happened. You both stared at eachother for a few seconds before you felt your face grow hot. You quickly covered your chest and closed the curtains. He popped a boner real fast.

—

I’m all out of brain juice 😭 I’m so sorry, I have no idea what this trope is, so I hope this works 🫶🫶 if it doesn’t, I’ll rewrite it fr LOLL but my requests are always open 😼