#I always kept the FBI agent’s gender vague since they were some faceless government lackey but fuck it

[morganbritton132]

Eddie, posting to Tiktok: Hey guys. Sorry about Steve tinfoil-hatting the background. We overheard someone talking about an NDA at dinner and now he thinks the FBI is going to kill us.

Steve: They were talking about someone breaking an NDA on the phone. Who (1) has an NDA and (2) breaks it? You! All the time.

Eddie: Baby, sweetheart. Steve! They sounded like a lawyer. A bad one in cheap ass shoes.

Steve: You don’t know what lawyers talk about! And did you see them? Bad hair, bad clothes, looks like they’ve never seen the fucking sun? That’s the fucking CIA, man.

Eddie, not winning this one: …Okay. Well. I’m going to put this on the internet. Then if we turn up dead, you can be vindicated.

Steve: That’s actually a good idea. Post it twice.

Their FBI agent watching this video as they come back from lunch: …Oh. Shit.