#⁎ || when everything’s made to be broken. i just want you to know who i am. ( visage. )

[qqueenofhades]

There is no law that prevents a convicted felon from running for and becoming president, nor a law that bans someone from being president in prison. Also, if Trump gets incapacitated in someway, many ultra right republicans who equally despise trans people and immigrants and Muslims would happily take his place

And I ask, with all due respect, what is your point?

Do you think I don't know that?

Do you think I am somehow convinced that everything is hunky dory now and we don't have any work left to do?

Are you just determined to be the first of the gloom-and-doomers who show up like clockwork in my inbox, every time some consequence happens to Trump, to morosely insist that no consequences will happen to him? First it was "he'll win re-election." Then it was "the coup will succeed." Then it was "he will never be indicted." Then it was "2022 will be a red wave!" Then it was "he will never be tried." Then it was "he will never be convicted." Now we've moved on, within less than 2 hours of the first US President ever to be convicted of ONE felony, let alone THIRTY-FOUR, "he'll never be sentenced or face a real consequence or lose the election." The goalposts keep moving RIGHT along without even a single pause to acknowledge the difficulty and the value of the progress we have made thus far, and it makes me CRAZY.

Do you people realize how fucking rare it is, both in the world today and historically, for a former (and would-be future) head of state to be held to criminal account by a jury of 12 anonymous ordinary citizens? When that one person, Trump, is the center of the malignant fascist cancer that has spread through this country ever since 2016, and plenty of his cultists are still insisting that it's Trump or nobody for them? When we've actually reached the stage of holding him legally accountable for (some of) his crimes for the first time in his miserable misbegotten life? I suspect that most of you are so deep in the "America is totally broken and the system is useless and we can only Revolute!!!1" rabbit hole that you're bound and determined to argue away every step we take, however slow, as Meaning Nothing TM. Voting? Fake. Fighting to make real progress? Also fake. Everything is fake except our belief that everything is broken and we need the Keyboard Warrior Glorious Revolution!!! As long as you can keep inventing ever more contorted twists of logic to ignore everything else that's happened so far, this makes sense... or something. I guess?

Now we're onto "removing Trump won't matter :(" when a whole lot of people have been fighting day and fucking night to get all the privileged-princess Online Leftists to get off their Che Guevara cosplaying asses and cast a single fucking vote to keep us from full-on-sliding into fascism. A slide into fascism that, again, has been spearheaded and centered around Trump's toxic cult of personality and which is still tied to him in almost every way. Apparently holding him to account (again, which has never happened to him in his life) already doesn't matter because wah wah he won't suffer any consequences. If he loses this election he's probably going to jail for the rest of his life! We would have electorally defeated the greatest threat to the American democratic experiment in 250 years, and frankly a huge part of the fascist far-right hydra that is currently attempting a comeback around the world! This is, yet again:

THE FIRST TIME ANY AMERICAN PRESIDENT, EVER, HAS BEEN CONVICTED OF MULTIPLE FELONY CHARGES IN A COURT OF LAW BY A JURY OF HIS PEERS

and yet we're still hearing that nothing matters and no work has been done and removing him will have no effect???

Come on. Come on. I know it's tiring and it's slow and it doesn't go as fast as we want. But every single damn time the process goes another step, here you people are in my inbox insisting that we're still at zero progress and it means nothing, and lemme tell you, I am Tired of it. Come on. You don't have to jump up and down (my own feeling is glee and vindication but still not relaxation, I will not relax until he loses the fucking election and goes to jail), but you also don't need to keep myopically pretending that all the effort thus far by so many people means nothing. Come on.

[theosmommy1966]

Unfair Love

Your fingers were cramping from how hard you were holding the door. Your eyes mad to be deceiving you, Regulus fucking Black cant be standing in front of you. The guy you loved from the simply age of 5 all the way until the end of school. He had been your best friend, the guy you pined over for years and years while he pushed you aside every time he got a girlfriend. Only to suck you right back in when he got bored. 

“No..” You said moving to close the door to your brother's manor. Tom, Mattheo and You were triplets. Magical beings already formed crazy connections but the three of you could literally feel each other and each other's major feelings. So the shock and pain of seeing Regulus had pulled them from the upstairs living room to the top of the stairs. Leaning against opposite walls, Tom positions so he could see down the stairs easily keeping an eye on you while being positioned in a way to be easily overlooked. 

When Regulus pushed his way in, it took everything in both of them to stay put but your voice stopped them. “Tom is home. If that's not bad enough, so is Mattheo. Do not come any further into my home Regulus.” Regulus paused just inside the door, while he had been friends with both boys in school. He also knew they were fiercely protective of their ‘baby’ sister. They would kill each other if the other hurt her, so they would easily Avada him if he pushed to hard. 

“Y/n.. Dont marry him.” He said in a nonchalant tone. Acting like he wasnt rocking her world and trying to crumble her relationship to pieces. “ Regulus.. Your being a dick.” You said unconsciously stepping towards the stairs and pulling your hands up to your chest. He stepped towards you and smiled in a cocky way that made you want to slap him “Come on y/n/n, you know you its always been me.. Dont marry him.” 

Those words sparked anger in your gut. 

Stepping towards him this time you sneer. “I was second to every single girl that even looked your way in school! You literally asked me to the yule ball and then FORGOT and went with some girl from Ravenclaw! I cant.. I wont.. I.. I..” It felt like a let down to your last name when that spark died and never turned into a fire as you started to almost hyperventilate. Every time he broke your heart played through your head as his eyes flicked above your head. 

You didnt need to turn around to know your brothers were coming down. Mattheo was past you quickly, having moved before your breathing even got uneven. Tom wasnt as familiar with panic and anxiety attacks as you and he were. He didnt stop to comfort you as he grabbed his old friend harshly and jerked him out the door. He didnt slam it on his way out knowing that would just startle you and make it worse. 

Tom had always for some reason been the one you went to for comfort. You thought it was probably just because he was the ‘oldest’. He was the one who retucked you into bed when you had bad dreams even though he was the same age. He had always just carried himself in a way that gave big brother vibes. Every where you went people thought you and Matt were twins and Tom was the older brother. 

He would always have a hard time dealing with others feelings but he always made the most effort for his siblings. When you collapsed onto the stairs and started sobbing he moved the rest of the way to you quickly. He tries to get you to calm your breathing but its like you cant hear him. He does the only thing he knows too, the same thing he use to do when you were children and he couldnt wake you from a nightmare. Pressing his forehead to yours he gently entered your mind. it was easy to find you in panic because when all the thoughts finally formed into a picture you were stood frozen while everything moved around you. 

Him saying your name broke your focus as you turned confused then relieved to see him. “Tommy” You said in a broken whisper as he reached for you, tucking your head against his shoulder and hugging you he looked around. “Lets walk through all this, yeah?” Nodding against his chest “I just feel so much right now.. Im so mad at Regulus. Ive tried my entire life to be what he wants, to be someone he sees but he never did. I was just someone to placate his ego in between relationships.” 

Tom watches as memories of you crying, of Regulus manipulating you and leaving flash around him and he squeezes tighter. “He hasnt spoken t-to me in years and then he just shows up here the night before Im supposed to get married?!” You sob and then suck in a harsh breath “Oh my god. Teddy.. Whats he going to think when he finds out I was crying over another man when im supposed to be relaxing and getting ready to marry him!” 

You pull away and pull out of your head and then away from Tom in the real world. Standing you start to pace and pull at your hair. Tom sighs and stands to try and stop you but the door flies open. Mattheo running in frantically looking for you, only to be shoved out of the way by your tall sandy blond fiancee. “Tesoro” He barley whispers as he rushes to pull you into his arms. Your knees giving out again but he keeps you up. His huge hand cups the back of your head and neck as he shushes you gently. 

Theo swears his heart is breaking as your shoulders rack with sobs. He turns to look at his other best friends, Tom is staring at the door, clearing pissed and trying to stay put. Mattheo is pulling at his own hair when he sees the questions in his friends eyes. Hes struggling because he wants to tell him so he can better comfort you, but he doesnt want to betray your trust. Thankfully he doesnt have to, you can feel his panic and pull away just enough too look up. “Regulus was here.” 

Theos head snaps back to you and he tries to reign in his feelings quickly knowing that they will all play out on his face. His first feeling was worry, he had worked so hard to show you how you should actually be treated. So many dates where he couldnt even hold your hand yet. Regulus had treated you so poorly from day one that his nontoxic love was foreign and unwelcome. 

You had grown up in vastly different environments. Birthing triplets had killed your mother. While your father wasn't horrible or abusive, he was unattentive. He would rather you have a nanny (who he sleeps with before replacing and repeating) then try and raise you alone. While Theo grew up with parents who not only loved him but each other. 

Next was anger at the audacity. Then was worry again but this time for you. Taking a deep breath and taking your cheek in one hand he wipes your tears away. “Ok, tell me why your so upset by that. We have to be on the same page to talk through this. Can we go sit down?” you shake your head and pull him up the stairs, away from your brothers to your room. You let go of his hand and keep walking straight for your bathroom. 

After a few mintues long arms wrapped around you, crossing over and gripping your upper arms. “Im here, Tesoro. Whenever your ready.” You didnt register any measure of time as you stood under the water with him holding you and pressing kisses to your neck and shoulder. “I dont deserve you theo..” you say so quietly he almost doesnt hear. Before he can ask what you mean your already speaking. “Here I am, the night before marrying you, crying over some other guy.. God im so horrible.” 

Before your hands can cover your face, Theo has spun you around and is tilting your face forcing you to look at him. He looks just a little annoyed as he speaks, “Dont say that. Do you remember what Tesoro means?” You sniffle and nod but he raises his eyebrows waiting for you to say it. “It means treasure.” He nods and smiles just a little “So.. My Tesoro couldnt be horrible.. I get it darling.. He was your first love, theres a lot of trauma there. I know your not crying because you miss him, your crying for 17 year old you, for 15 year old you and so on. And thats ok, because thats how we heal.” 

Theos heart warmed as you stare up at him in awe. “I know its difficult for you, my love. That this open communication and understanding isnt something that comes naturally too you. So youll have to give me just a little grace while I continue to learn to navigate you. I promise one day Ill be an expert.” He leans in and kisses your forehead, staying there for just a moment to give you both a second to pull yourselves together. 

When he pulled back the smile he loves was back on your face. He sighs happily and kisses your nose before looking at you. Everything was right in his world again, all he needed to do now, was wait for you to go to sleep. Because Regulus.. Well Theo completely understood where YOU were coming from. But Black? Nah. While tending to lean towards his mothers Hufflepuff nature, sometimes he needs to remind people why he was sorted into Slytherin. Why he became friends with The Dark Lords children. Why he and your brothers trusted him to care for you. And tonight, it would be Regulus` turn to learn. 

[tsukimara]

𝙷𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚑𝚎𝚛?𔓘

➸ "Forever together" Masterlist (Important)

➸ A silent voice / Koe no katachi AU

➸ Warning: Bullying, death wish, overthinking (?), anxiety.

➸ 𐙚PREVIOUS ||𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒|| NEXT 𖹭

➸ Chapter 3

Scaramouche immediately pulled his hand away from her, a small blush on his face. She didn't know why he reacted like that, she just wanted to be friends with him.

"What's your problem?!" — Heizou noticed the small blush on Scaramouche's cheeks and started to laugh quietly at him but got a sharp look from Scaramouche to shut up. He looked at her again and then she saw him take her notebook and throw it into the water nearby.

"Scara, was it really necessary-" — Scaramouche interrupted Kazuha — "Let's just go." — But as they were about to go, they heard the splash of water, and as they turned around, they saw her trying to find her notebook. Scaramouche started laughing at her but she still tried to find her notebook without giving up.

Scaramouche saw nothing wrong with bullying her. After all, it was her fault for ruining the entire atmosphere in the classroom, if it weren't for her, everything would be the same as before. This gave him satisfaction.

Until.

"Class, we would like to discuss something with you that is very important, that's why the principal is here." — Said Mr. Ragnvindr who had his arms crossed which showed he was not in a mood. The principal cleared his throat and began to speak — "This is about [ Name ] [ Last Name ] who, as you can see, is not with us here today. Yesterday we received a call from [ Name ]'s father. [ Name ]'s hearing aids have been broken or gone missing. Hearing aids are very expensive. Her father believes [ Name ] is being bullied." — There was silence in the class — "If any of you have seen [ Name ] being harassed or abused at school, I need you to tell me who is doing it. If no one says anything, unfortunately I will have to call your parents."

Scaramouche moved his leg nervously, he didn't even know why he was reacting like that. He noticed his hand shaking on the desk, he knew he had to tell the truth but was he sure? If he counted all the hearing aids he had destroyed, he knew his mother might even be short of money.

"This is a really serious matter and the school does not accept bullying-" "Raiden!" — The shout of his name brought him back to earth as he quickly stood up. Mr. Ragnvindr frowned at him, he tried to look less nervous but failed miserably.

"Now Megistus, you're sitting right next to him, what have you seen?" — Mona was a bit surprised when the teacher involved her in this, she didn't want to get in trouble, so she cleared her throat nervously — "Well, it's kind of true, he does tease her a little uhh like he makes fun of her." — Scara looked at her in disbelief. It's true what she said, but he didn't think she would say it and she didn't say it either, that she was talking behind her back.

"And Kaedehara?"

Kazuha was Scaramouche's best friend, he didn't want him to get in trouble but he also couldn't lie, what he did to [ Name ] was truly cruel. He felt guilty for not doing anything, so he looked away so as not to meet Scaramouche's gaze, who probably thought he would support him in this matter.

"It's... True."

Scaramouche couldn't believe what he heard — "What? It's not fair! You all made fun of her too! Everyone did it! I swear it's true! Especially Mona and Sucrose!" — When he finished, Sucrose suddenly started crying. She took off her glasses to wipe away the tears that were falling.

"That's mean... I would never do anything like that. How... How could you say something like that...?" — The entire class started whispering and some even looked at Scaramouche with furious expressions for making Sucrose cry. Why was everyone looking at him like that? It wasn't just his fault! Why did everyone blame only him and not the rest?! Why?!

From that day on, his 'friends' turned away from him. Most of them looked at him in disgust for what he had done. That's why he's sitting in dirty water now, because he was pushed in, a soaked school bag with books is lying next to him, some of them even fell completely into the water, and one was on his head. He saw his 'friends' walk away, not wanting to have anything to do with him today. Reluctantly, he started to take his books out of the water when suddenly he saw a notebook, but it wasn't his, and when he opened it, he saw a signature.

6-2 [ Name ] [ Last Name ]

So this was her notebook, huh? He thought she took it out. He started looking through her notebook, the first few pages had many nice words written on them, such as 'good luck' , 'you look nice' and others. Turning to the next pages, he saw that people were no longer writing nice things, on the contrary. They were also annoyed that they had to keep helping her and she only replied 'I'm sorry'. He shook his head, not believing that he had read it, like it or not, he took the notebook and headed towards his house. He was soaked and especially today he wanted to avoid his mother, so he discreetly entered the house, when he thought he had succeeded, he suddenly heard her.

"Kunikuzushi!" — But he completely ignored her as he climbed the stairs — "Come back here! I'm talking to you!" — She followed him, not wanting to leave him alone when the school called her and informed her about everything

"Kunikuzushi. They called from school...wait a minute, why are you so wet?" — Scaramouche had his back to her, but she could see water dripping from him and his school bag.

"Leave me alone. I jumped in the river like always." — He wanted to go to his room and never come out again, but his mother wouldn't leave him alone, continuing the conversation — "Have you been causing trouble at school?"

"No..."

"Then why did I get a call from your teacher this afternoon?"

"Okay fine! It's true!" — Scaramouche couldn't stand it anymore and yelled, looking into her eyes. He saw in her eyes that she was disappointed. He no longer had the strength to explain himself to her.

"Get cleaned up, We're going to [ Last Name ]." — With that, she left and he just tightened his grip on [ Name ] notebook.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Scaramouche sat in the back of the car watching out the window as his mother took the bank's money, he frowned when he noticed how much his mother had taken. Then they arrived at the place where [ Name ]'s father was waiting for them, he didn't look angry but he didn't look calm either. He had long white hair that reached down to his waist, pale skin and dark blue eyes that could kill with just one look, or at least that's what he felt. Leaning against the car, he saw his mother handing money to [ Name ]'s father. Scaramouche couldn't read his expression as to what he was thinking now, it was still the same. His mother waved at him and left with [ Name ]'s father, who frowned as he looked at Scara, making him shiver a little.

He knew it would take some time so he decided to walk around the area. While walking, he noticed a staircase going down so he went down but suddenly stopped when he saw [ Name ]. She was sitting on a bench feeding pigeons with bread, she didn't even realize he was standing there. What was she doing here?! Not wanting to be noticed, he quickly hid behind a column. He wanted to walk behind her, but he accidentally tripped over the uneven sidewalk, causing the pigeons to get scared and fly away.

"What are you looking at?!" — Scaramouche quickly ran towards the steps to the bridge. He didn't expect her here, he thought her father came here without her. Panting, he placed his hands on his knees as he reached the bridge. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her again, but she wasn't alone, but with her father this time. He wanted to say he was sorry but his ego wouldn't let him and why should he be the only one apologizing? Her father looked him up and down.

"What a vulgar face... Just like your mother's." — Her father started to lead her to the car when he said this. She didn't know what he said so she just smiled and Scaramouche clenched his fist when he heard it. They are comparing him to his mother again.

"Let's go home, Kuni." — He scoffed when he heard how she called him but didn't add anything else. This day was hard and exhausting for him, he preferred not to have another argument with his mother. He thought everything would be back to normal tomorrow, but he was wrong.

The next day at school, when he was about to change his shoes, he saw that they had pins in them, just like he did to [ Name ]...

After she came.

His friends changed.

He changed.

They used to get along so well.

He got hit in the head with the ball from his 'friends', just like he did to [ Name ] ...

It's all her fault.

His shoes were thrown into the garbage, just like he did to [ Name ]...

[ Name ] [ Last Name ].

They took his school bag and threw all his stuff on the ground, just like he did to [ Name ]...

He hates her.

He was doused with a garden hose, just like he did to [ Name ]...

HE HATES HER.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by [ Name ] who crouched down next to him and started picking up his things that were scattered around. When she noticed that he was looking at her, she smiled, which irritated him and he sharply grabbed his things from her.

"Get your hands off my stuff! Go away!" — He didn't want HER to help him. He didn't want any of HER help. He didn't want HER to feel sorry for him. He wasn't like HER. She didn't know what to do, so she decided to leave when she saw him herding her with his hand. She just wanted to help him.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

"Gone?!" — Scaramouche whispered to himself when he noticed his shoes were missing. He was furious but chose to ignore it. After all, he wanted this life, right? It's not boring anymore...

Every day something had to happen. He couldn't sit in the classroom because his chair disappeared several times, and while cleaning, others dropped dirt on him, saying it was an accident and his shoes often disappeared.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

"You lost your shoes again?" — Ei asked him as they were eating dinner and his sister was sitting across from him — "Yeah, I lost them in the river."

He noticed his mother frowning, not really believing him, but he didn't want to show that he was weak — "Do you want me to talk to your teacher?" — What did she care anyway? — "About what?"

"About your shoes..." — Scaramouche rolled his eyes and scoffs — " I told you I lost them in the river!" — Ei just sighed and went back to eating. She hoped he really lost his shoes in the river and not because of something else.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

While going to school, he started thinking about the words his teacher once told him. 'Your responsibility...' It kept going through his mind over and over again, and he started to notice that he was walking with his head in the clouds. which hadn't happened to him before. What's happening to him?

After putting on a new pair of shoes, he walked towards his classroom with his hands in his pockets. As he was about to enter the room, he noticed [ Name ] soaking a cloth and wiping the words off her desk? She's still being bullied? Sucks to be her... Wait, no. That was his desk...

Unexpectedly, he moved her away from his desk, which had many things written on it, but what stood out the most was the large "DIE" written in the middle... So they wanted his dead...? He stared blankly at the sign and then his attention was caught by the fresh flowers on the windowsill, which [ Name ] probably brought. Did that mean she came here every morning and erased the writing on his desk?

Stupid girl.

He felt her put a hand on his shoulder but he moved away from her. She's stupid. Why did she do it? Why did she remove them? He treated her badly!

"Get out!" — He exclaimed in her face as she held the cloth she was wiping his desk close to her, he knew she couldn't hear me so he showed her the door with his finger, she just nodded slowly and left the classroom. He was alone now, the silence squeaking uncomfortably in his ears as he rested his hands on his desk. She really pisses him off! He felt his tears wanting to fall so he quickly wiped them away with his sleeve, his stomach turning around from the stress.

[ Name ] [ Last Name ]

He hated her...

➸ 𐙚PREVIOUS ||𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒|| NEXT 𖹭

➸ Sorry it's short, but I'm often busy right now. I think that after June 18, I'll be able to write more often :D

➸ And in the next chapter they will be older.

➸ Umm I don't know why I can't tag two people- (I will try later again)

➸ Have a good night or day! 🫶

(⁠つ⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)⁠つ TAGLIST — @leafyaa , @luvkvni , @sayakaskokofish , @sketcheeee , @featuredtofu , @fallenisded , @skyvella , @mimiemie , @enjisthings , @xxrexx , @ylapsha45 , @shonoko-en , @blacky-rose , @0kauy , @vernith , @riinstar , @sl-vega ,

Red = I can't tag you

[plussizefantasia]

Broken Together

BlackCat!reader x Bucky Barnes

Chapter 5/6 : <Prev/ Next>

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Talks of violence, suggestive language

A/N: okay so I fully planned to do a smut scene but then I chickened out because I've never written one before so.... sorry. ALSO: keep your eyes peeled for the kickoff post of my 300-follower (holy shit) celebration along with chapter 3 of the Fluttering Hearts series, both will be coming out before the end of the day!

You nod a solitary nod and reach for the door handle.

“I love you.”

 That stops you cold in your tracks.

“Don’t say that.”

“That’s not really the reaction I was looking for if I’m honest.”

“Well what did you want me to say James?”

“I don’t know, really anything but don’t say that. I tell you how I’m feeling and you know that I’m not good with that feeling shit and your reaction is to tell me not to say it?”

“Jesus Bucky, I can’t ever tell with you! Two minutes ago you were giving me the silent treatment and being all pissy and now you tell me you love me? What am I supposed to do with that?!”

“I- just… I spent the whole night worrying about you, you were back there in that room all alone with those bastards and I couldn’t get to you. I just had to listen through comms and hope and pray to whatever God there is that you come out the other side.”

“Bucky, I can take care of myself.”

“I know that, really I do. I have never ever doubted that you could handle yourself but that doesn’t make it any less terrifying when you go somewhere I can’t reach you. It’s bad enough I had to watch you hanging off that asshole all night. Watching him touch you in the way I’d wanted to all night.” Bucky’s hands tighten around the wheel. You watch as he swallows something caught in his throat.“I watched and stood there like an idiot while he held you close and made you laugh and did everything I’d been dreaming about. I couldn’t look away though, as much as I wanted to becuase even a glimpse of your smile is enough to make all that shit worth it. But then I hear you being threatened, I watch you walk away with the target and not even five minutes later he pulls a gun on you? It took everyhting in me not to run to you, not to burst in and protect you with all I have.”

“I don’t need your protection-”

“I know that! Goddamn it I know that! I know that your amazing, that’s the only thing that kept me from running in there, knowing how good you are. How good my girl is at her job, she doesn’t need me, but I really fucking wish she did.”

“You’re girl? I’m not your girl James I- you don’t even like me?” 

“What?! Why the hell do you think I don’t like you?”

You scoff, “You give me shit all the time. You call me Fury’s pet and you never fail to let everyone know just how much you don’t trust me.”

“I trust you, I trust you with my whole life, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.” 

“You have a funny fuckign way of showing it.” You cross your arms over your chest, this whole night scratch that day has been a total fucking emotional rollercoaster, you almost died and now here you are. The man who you love to hate and hate to love is spouting all kinds of heartfult shit and you’re reeling, I mean… what are you supposed to say to that?!

Bucky takes your silence harshly, he tries to fill the space with as many words as he can. He knows that he’s not good at this shit. He isn’t James Barnes the ladies man from the forties anymore, he’s too broken for that. But he can tell your broken too, and maybe you can be broken together? 

“When I say that I love you, I mean it. I mean that I can’t stop thinking about you, when youre not next to me it’s like i can’t breathe. When I hear you laugh or see you smile my whole world lights up. God even when you’re yelling at me an throwing pillows and shit I can’t help but feel like a goddamn wire. I don’t know when I realized it was love, if it was months ago or minutes ago but I’m not taking it back. I don’t think I can ever take it back.” Bucky ends his rant with several big breaths. The whole time he was talking, his eyes never left the road, his hands never left the wheel. 

“James, I- God fuck. I’m not a good person. I don’t deserve good things. Anyone i’ve ever been close to has told me the same shit, i’m too broken to be good to anyone.”

“Yeah. You’re broken. You’re a smart-mouth little piece of shit who doesn’t lok after herself and can’t follow a sleep schedule for the life of her and I love you.” He finally looks into your eyes.

“I don’t need a perfect girl, I don’t want a perfect girl, someone to hang off my arm and laugh at my jokes and just stand there looking pretty? I’ve had that and it gets boring really fucking fast. But you? I could spend the rest of my life trying to figure you out and I really really want to.” 

“I’m not easy, and I don’t think I ever will be.”

“I like a challenge.”

“Well,-”

“Jesus, Stop trying to talk me out of this, I want you. I want you and all the messy shit that come’s with that.”

“I’m running out of reasons anyway.”

“What does that mean… for us I guess?” 

“It means that if you can get us back to the hotel within the next five minutes I’m gonna let you see the pretty little number I have on underneath this dress.”

Bucky slammed on the gas.

_____

It took the two of you four minutes to get to the hotel, the entire time people were honking at your car weaving through traffic. You’re really fucking surprised that the two of you didn’t get pulled over. 

Four minutes is a lot of time though, especially when your nervous as hell and have a penchant for self-sabatage. You don’t know how this is going to go. This is brand new territory for you and honestly your shitting bricks right now with how nervous you are.

It’s not like you’ve never been with anyone, but Bucky is the first guy that you’ll genuinely care what happens when it’s over. Most of the guys you’ve been with before have been the type to only want something physical from you, not that you were complaining, you had needs and they were willing to fuffil them. They just didn’t want to date you, and never once had any of them used the L-word. 

You’re still reeling from Bucky’s confession. You have no idea how long he’s felt this way but the more you think about it the more it makes sense. For as long as you’ve known the man he’s been difficult to read, he build walls as easily as you do and he uses them to block out 99.99% of people in his life. 

Now that you’re really thinking about it you’re astonished at how much he told you tonight. You guess having a gun pulled on the person you care about really makes you want to tell them everything you’d been holding back.

You’d be lying if you thought that there wasn’t something you also wanted to tell Bucky when you heard the safety click off. You don’t know if love is the right word, not yet but you do know that he means just about the world to you. The only person in your life who really seems to see you and understand what you’re thinking. You’ve always liked working with Barnes, it was easy, but now you think there might be something else to it. 

Bucky pulls into a parking spot right at the front of the building and within seconds he’s by your door opening it and offering you a hand to step out.

“Eager?”

“Very.”

He pulls you out of the car but doesn’t step back, he crowds you in every sense of the word. You see and smell and think nothing but him. This close you notice the little things that you hadn’t before, like the little piece of hair that keeps falling onto his forehead, escaping the gel holding the rest of his locks back. Or the way small scars he has, one above his eyebrow, a line to the right of his lip, a little triangle under his eyes. You could spend hours studying him, he doesn’t give you that long tough,

“Can I kiss you?” He asks, moving closer to your mouth. You don’t answer, just push yourself into him. You practically melt at the little groan that falls past his lips. 

His hands fall to your hips almost instintually, the grab ahold of you firmly not willing to let you move even an inch from his hold.

His mouth moves passionalty against yours, he takes his time really trying to get to feel you, to taste you. The pulls away only enough to get air into his lungs, resting his forehead agaisnt yours. God he could kiss you for a lifetime and even a bit longer than that.

“That was…” you start.

“Yeah.” The corners of his lips turn up into a genuine smile. You love his smile even if you don’t get to see it that often. 

“James?” 

“Yeah Kitty?” He giggles… this grown ass man giggles into you.

“Take me upstairs, these people don’t need a show.” You nod your head at the gathering of people outside, trying and failing to make it look like they weren’t just staring.

“Gladly.” 

[sinner-sunflower]

P.2 HH Lucifer-centric AU 26/?

STORY 1, PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 14.5, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18, PART 19, PART 20, PART 21, PART 22, PART 23, PART 24, PART 25

I wish this was longer but death goes by faster than you think.

------------------------------------------

Lucifer thought it was a myth, you know, the idea that life flashes before your eyes when you're dying.

But as he recalls everything that happened since the beginning beginning, he wonders if he is reliving it all in a loop. Can a memory experience it as well? Can a memory exist within a memory? He doesn't know if he's just a copy of a copy, and that thought terrifies him.

But this feels real. Dying, that is.

Roo: You were always so arrogant.

A voice echoed somewhere. It was Roo, appearing suddenly like she always does.

Arrogant or misunderstood? Lucifer replied internally, voice laced with a hint of weariness.

Roo: Does it matter now? You're dying, fallen. Even you cannot cheat fate.

Oh Father, this is really happening. He's really going to die; just when he found new people to care about, someone to love again, and reconnected with his daughter—he's going to leave them. Leave Alastor. The Sins. God, Charlie.

He wants to spend the rest of eternity making her happy. He wants to tell her more stories of his good times in Heaven and Eden. To teach her how to properly use her powers. To watch her fulfill her dreams. Damn it, he wants to see her get married. To walk her down the aisle. To welcome Vaggie to their family. He wants to be there for every laugh, every tear, every triumph, and every setback. He longs to witness every precious moment of her life unfold.

It'snotfairIt'snotfair!It'snotfairIt'snotfair!It'snotfairIt'snotfair!It'snotfairIt'snotfair!

He wants to spend one more moment with Alastor. To kiss him. To hug him and never let go. He wants to find another stupid Marigold in every corner for him to find. He wants to hear Alastor's voice, to share in his laughter, to feel the warmth of his presence. He wants to be selfish and let Hell be destroyed—just please, 'Dad, please I just want to live one more day!'

He yearns to see Earth's sun rise one more time, to feel its warmth on his face as he sits on it's grassy plains. To share another meal, another conversation, another fleeting second of joy. He wants to hold onto the fragile, beautiful moments that made life now worth living. The thought of leaving now, of abandoning this newfound happiness, is unbearable. He’s desperate, clawing at the very fabric of existence for one more chance, one more breath, one more heartbeat.

How will Alastor learn to love again? How will the Sins cope with losing the person who raised them, who gave them their everything? How will Charlie-

How will Michael and the others...

But it's not them who he calls out to. Because he's also once a child. And like a child in their time of need, he calls out to his father.

'Father! Please! I need you! Don't let them take me yet, DAD PLEASE!'

Lucifer wants to scream it all out, but he only spits out blood as the sword of his older brother impales him right in his heart. For a moment, he thinks it is Michael holding the sword—that he has betrayed him again.

The relief he feels when he realizes it is the exorcist who just stabbed him almost makes him forget what's happening.

Almost.

Lute pushes the sword further into him and twists it. Shit! It hurts like a bitch. He could probably destroy her now, but he's honestly too shocked to do anything. He's frozen in place, but his entire body is shaking.

Roo: This is it, fallen.

The battlefield is chaos and screams, but he can't hear any of it—only a dark, broken laugh from Lute.

Roo: Make them pay for it.

Her eyes are pure black now, and Lucifer knows that there's only a sliver of sanity left in her. They are both dying here today.

One way or another.

They don't move and it feels like an eternity before he finds the strength to speak without coughing blood.

Lucifer: Exorcist.

Lute: What? Here to say your last words?

He ignores her taunts and keeps his voice calm.

Lucifer: Tell me again. What is your name?

She digs the weapon deeper and gets all up in his face. If she had more control of her mind, she would not answer and would spit in the devil's face. But she's losing it.

So she answers.

Lute: I am Lute. Leader of the exorcists. The first man's former lieutenant. The angel who just rid the world of the devil.

It's funny, really. Getting killed by Michael's sword wielded by an angel named Lute. Guess that part about "the instrument of Heaven will be the Devil's slayer" bullshit in the prophecy was spot on.

It's funny so he laughs.

He feels himself slipping away and Roo clawing her way up. There's a distinct sound of cracking, and he sees that it's his skin breaking apart like he's a porcelain doll. But he pays it no mind.

Lucifer: I have to congratulate you, Lute.

Lute: Oh yeah? Why's that?

His laughter fades, replaced by a somber tone.

Lucifer: See. I may have damned humanity.

Her eyes narrow, suspicion mingling with her fading sanity.

Lucifer: But you. Ohhhhh you.

He continues, a dark smile tugging at his lips.

Lucifer: You've just damned Heaven.

Then.

Then, the light fades from Lucifer's eyes as life slips away, and his body slumps against his brother's blade.

He's glad to have at least something familiar for comfort.

Someone calls the angel's name that made her pull the sword out of him and jump back.

The devil falls to the ground, motionless. And for a moment, everything is quiet, and then—

'Finally. I can sleep.'

What happens after is a cautionary tale.

------------------------------------------

So.

I'm sorry?

This was always how this was going to go.

Also one more update before this is done!

Please let me know what you guys think! I'd love to hear your comments <3

Do you guys think this is entire AU was just Luci's life flashing before him?

[stephsbridgerton]

Confessions

My take on how the Lady Whistledown reveal between Pen and Colin could go in s3p2!

TW: Angst

Let me know if you want a second (smutty) chapter in the comments!

Thanks to @barbiewritesstuff for betaing!

Check this story out on Ao3!

Pen was breathless by the time they made it to what she assumed was Colin’s room. Her panic did not allow for her to take much of it in as she turned to face him in the soft light of the moon.

“Colin,” she said, her voice breaking on a sob,”I-”

His eyes were icy and his voice hard, as he cut her off,  “How could you? How could you expose Eloise? Marina?” 

Penelope closed her eyes, taking a breath, her answer surprised even herself, “Because I love you, I’ve loved you from the first day we met. You fell off your horse and even though you were covered in mud, you laughed. You showed me kindness when others would have been cruel.” 

“Pen-” he started, confusion and shock painted his features. 

“Please,” she replied, her voice rough and broken, her eyes pleading with him to let her explain. 

At his silence she continued speaking, “Marina was using you, when my mother found out she was pregnant they decided to trick a young man into marriage and hoped that he wouldn’t notice when the baby came early. I tried - I did everything I could think of. I - I couldn’t let them use you Colin…” she trailed off as she broke down in sobs, hugging her arms to her chest. 

Warm arms enveloped her in a tight hug, “Shhhh,” he breathed into the top of her head, “It’s okay Pen, I-” Colin let out a shuddering breath, “I didn’t realize how far her scheming went.” 

Taking a deep, gasping breath, Pen nodded, trying to calm herself enough to continue, once she had quieted her crying, Colin prompted her again, “What about Eloise? Does this have to do with your apparent falling out?”

A lone tear fell on to her reddened cheek, her heart breaking as she continued to lay her sins bare to him, “She had drawn the attention of the Queen. She thought El was Whistledown, she threatened to ruin your family. I knew that if what El was doing was printed, the Queen would leave your family alone. I didn’t want to publish it, and I published a tame version of the events at that, but I did it to protect your family.”

With that she stayed silent, the occasional hiccuping breath escaping the confines of her lips as a steady stream of tears flowed down her face. She couldn’t bring herself to look up at him, especially with the next statement that left her lips, her voice nothing but a pained whisper, “I would understand if you felt differently now. If you travel for a year I’m sure the scandal would die off, I won’t pose a threat to your future.”

She felt his grip loosen as he pulled away from her slightly, “Pen,” he whispered, as he lifted her chin with a finger, their gaze connecting as he made a confession of his own, “I love you, I’m sorry it took me so long to see it, to see you. I would be a fool to let you go. Let me protect you, as you have protected my family and I.”

The shock of his confession found Penelope on the verge of sobbing again, but the quivering of her lip was put to a stop as Colin crashed his mouth down on to hers, their kiss all consuming, sealing their fate together. 

Colin broke away first, “Pen if I had known, I -” 

“Shhh,” she said, placing her finger on his lips to silence him, “It is alright,” she said with a sad smile.

He brought a hand up to pull hers from his mouth, “No, it is the farthest from alright,” he said, his hold on her getting just a bit tighter than before, “God, you were protecting me, and Eloise, and look how we have treated you. Hell, up until ten minutes ago I was ready to dance on Lady Whistledown’s grave.” 

“You didn’t know,” she said, “I couldn’t tell you, I had to protect you, and El, if the Queen finds out who I am, everyone we know will be threatened. Colin, are you certain you still want to marry me?”

Pen’s heart stopped as his look turned almost dark before she felt his hands shift lower, from her waist to her bum, and she let out a surprised squeal as Colin picked her up with ease, her legs wrapping around his trim waist on instinct and her hands clutching at the back of his neck. 

“You are my dearest friend, and fierce protector, there is nothing that will keep me from marrying you now,” he said, his voice deep and heady, “I only wish I had plucked up the courage to tell you I was interested in you as more than just a friend sooner, much sooner” he ended in a whisper, his lips seeking hers out passionately.  

Footsteps in the hallway brought their embrace to a stand still, Colin’s grip on her vice-like as they both held their breath, the footsteps fading down the hall until they were left in silence once again. 

Colin quickly put her down on her own feet once more, “Forgive me Pen, I should not have- You are too precious to me for me to treat you this way, now and in the carriage, I am a gentleman, I should-” 

Pen gripped his collar with her fingers and pulled him down into a softer, slower kiss, “I find I am not sorry in the least,” she said, a smirk finding its way onto her face. 

Puffing out a laugh, Colin’s gaze fell from her lips to her breasts, and on down. She felt his hands shift on her waist, turning her until her back was tucked tightly against his front and she could feel the hard planes of his body against her feminine softness. Penelope’s breath caught in her throat as she saw them standing in the mirror. 

Colin’s hands framing her hips, his lips pink and slightly swollen from their passionate kissing, how tall his frame was in comparison to her own. While Pen wasn’t one to be caught admiring herself in the mirror, she couldn’t keep her eyes from taking in her own flushed cheeks and chest, how her lips looked slightly puffy and darker than usual, and how dark her irises had become in the face of their passion. 

She continued to watch as Colin traced a finger from her ear, down her neck and across her shoulder, to the strap of her dress, the roughness of his voice surprising her, “I do believe we have some unfinished business, Pen.”

[buddie911abc]

Warning. I'm moping.

**I said all this, but then remember how broken Buck and Eddie looked when Chris left. I just can't handle it. The tears.**

I am so gutted about Chris leaving. I've always loved Eddie's dedication and love for his son. It is a big part of his character. This was something special about him that made him stand apart from other characters. I could end the post here because that alone is just devastating.

But I can't leave it alone. I have entered another mopey phase. I was thinking about Eddie the other day. If Buck becomes wrapped up in Tommy, and his new Bobby-approved relationship, then I have to wonder who Eddie is as a character. Who is Eddie now that he might not be part of a super-couple. He was always more than just that. Right? Will Eddie just fade away into a side character? Buck and Eddie will still be friends, but without the Buddie, slow-burn-undercurrent of tension, the friendship hits different. Even when they were with other people, scenes were written that made them gravitate back to each other. (Buddie did not come into existence just because two hot guys were friends. We were seeing content written with multiple interpretations, but there was something in direction, acting, idk. that made it more) I'm not sure we're getting that anymore.

Buck and Eddie hung out all the time. Buck cooked for Eddie and Chris. Buck watched Chris while Eddie did different things, and the two of them had moments they wouldn't have had if Buck hadn't already been present due to Chris. If Buck prepared a meal just for him and Eddie, that would be dating, and they've made it clear they aren't going that route. Eddie has also been framed as a bad@$$ ex-military guy. It once made him unique in the show, but he shares that with Tommy now and Tommy is also a pilot. Eddie was a great father to a child with different needs. That has been taken away as well.

In one of Ryan's interviews, he talked about learning to love himself. I think there is potential, but for the life of me, I can't imagine what kind of story arc you would put with that. He has no foil. He has nothing to push against, and I'm just not in a place where I can see them introducing a character I would appreciate as a love interest. They could still do a new love interest, but that defeats the purpose of learning to love yourself first.

I wanted the season to leave me on the hopeful side of Buddie. I wanted some sort of canon confirmation that makes the audience aware that something is there for Buddie even if the story on screen hasn't reached it yet. I wanted something substantial that isn't us reading a scene with multiple interpretations. Something clear. Some of you may recall I have been vacillating between worrying about Buddie being erased and being hopeful that it would be canon.

As the situation stands, the Will was not mentioned. Chris is gone so co-parenting is now over. They are still friends, but now the writers are putting them together in scenes differently. Buck's reaction to Eddie being shot. That was love. Whenever they had scenes together, there was an undercurrent. That doesn't seem to be present. The scenes from tonight were close, but they were driven by the wider intimacy of their connection to Chris. That chosen family, and again, at the end, Chris was gone.

Say what you will about Tommy. The fact that he was written as the place Buck went to after everything went down with Chris and Bobby, indicates a huge shift in the writing. A lot of people hate Tommy, but he's written to be likable. The hate is mostly unfair. There are a few legitimate complaints, but nothing to account for hate. Even though there hasn't been a lot written so far, time is going to fix how much content we see on Tommy. Until they write him unlikable he's going to gain traction. I'm not ready for that either. And you know Tommy hinting that he wants to be "Daddy" with Buck is going to hit right for a lot of people. (I don't get into the whole Daddy vibe but I respect that a lot of people dig it.)

Anywayz, I ramble. With no new content coming up. I'll have to see if my hope will bounce back again. Maybe I'll see an interview to sway me back to hope.

Wait. I do have one hope. I hope I haven't brought the mood down for the rest of my fellow Buddie shippers. I rely on you guys. I need you to believe in Buddie in the moments I can't.

[zorosq]

obsession ; black leg sanji

↻ stalking, established relationship, umm... its unsettling?, a bit violence?, grammatical error

↻ pairing ↬ sanji x fem!reader!

a/n i like the idea of sanji being overly obsessed with his lover. also havent write anything in a long time and i got an idea from reading the book "the obsession"

the day that you had met sanji was the day that your life brightens. you had just broken up with your boyfriend that day and got kicked out of the apartment that you had bought.

and you were practically disowned by your family for dating your now ex-boyfriend.

it was a rainy day. you had sat patiently under the bus stop, not particularly waiting for a bus to show up but just for a shelter. you hadn't managed to actually get anything. just your personal belongings and a few bunch of clothes. it was the day that sanji had met you and fell for you.

he was a chef. a very damn good chef. he couldn't ignore the hungry look on your face across the street. the restaurant that he was working in was just across the bus stop. how much of a destiny could any of this be?

like the gentleman he is, he get himself to cooking and packed it up in his lunch box. it was an unpaid meal like always. though his father, zeff, was too tired of telling him the same thing.

with an umbrella in hand, sanji walked acrossed the street and sat down with a good distance between you two. like a shy cat asking for attention, he slowly pushed the lunch box towards you, not saying a single word until you take notice.

"eat up. you need energy if you're going to wait for the bus in this weather. they always shows up late because of some excuses," sanji rambled on.

from afar, he hadn't got a good look on your face. but when he finally turns to get a look at you, he was baffled. you were so so ethereal in his eyes. a beauty who had just cried her eyes out possibly due to hunger. there was just no way that anyone would hurt you. there would be no way. he was sure of it.

"i'm not- not waiting for a bus," you cracked a small smiled. that made his heart skipped a beat. sanji had saved you that day. in your eyes, he was your savior.

.

sanji had made it his job that he would help you make decisions for everything. you were so dependant on him. it makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

even when you were a trembling mess in front of him, scared of his very existence. he relish in your fear. "please, i just want to take a break with you," you begged, your voice coming out pathetically higher. "you know i can't do that sweetheart," he caressed your cheek. it made you flinched from the way he was doing it.

his eyes had a crazed look. you don't understand why it took you so long to realize that your boyfriend is a fucking psychopath.

his hands cupped your cheeks and he pressed his forehead against yours. "we can't do that. we're meant to be together," he smiled at you. "n-no. please, i just want a break. not a breakup," you shook your head.

"what if your feelings change? we can't have that, love," his hand trailed down to your neck.

.

you didn't mean to go through his stuff. but you were so curious of him. sanji had never told you about himself and he would always forbid you from entering that one room by the end of the hallway.

in the beginning, you didn't feel curious at all. but you had seen him going in and out of the room too many times a day that it piqued your interest. you had tried asking him what was in the room. but he just shrugged and said that it was work stuff.

it was weird since he was working as a chef. not an office worker or anything that he would need an office.

so when he went out to buy groceries, you decided to went inside the room. you knew that sanji didn't lock the door. he never did because he trusts you. or maybe he wanted you to see what was inside the room after you saw the content inside.

your eyes moved around the room quickly, scanning every picture that was hanged, every notes about your daily life. even a few notes about your personality. it was everything about you.

the room had overwhelmed you with how much... of you are in there.

you stumbled back, only to be met with sanji.

"sweetheart, didn't i tell you not to enter this room?" his hand rests on your shoulder, giving it a light squeeze.

[armed-with-a-waffle-iron]

Feeling so fucking emotional about Tim/Steph today, I can’t explain it.😭 I wholly blame Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls!

[vivitalks]

iris by the goo goo dolls said "you bleed just to know you're alive" and we were all just okay with that huh

[folklaurr]

I think every time Ao3 goes down their error page should start playing Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls automatically

[the-halfling-prince]

Wirt would absolutely be one of those bitches who loses his mind every time he hears Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls.

[thepavementsings]

listening to iris by the googoo dolls thinking about the horrors of suzuka last year...

[brightlotusmoon]

IRIS - Goo Goo Dolls (Rock cover by Jonathan Young)

Not to be an overly emotional Xennial but

[the-teddy-bear-butch]

Heeeeeey, so we’ve all sobbed in the car to Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls, right? (If you haven’t, I’m judging you. Harshly.)

What if I said that’s a Robin Blorbley song—

I don’t think I have to explain but I’m going to because no one can stop me <33

First of all, the pure pining of this fucking song and Robin pining over Miss Nancy Wheeler??? Hello???

We’ll skip to the chorus first because i enjoy hurting myself <33

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

Robin Buckley, who has come out to one (1) person because she is so scared of what will happen. Of COURSE the world won’t understand, her world is 80’s Hawkins, Indiana, and she’s watched people be awful to other queer people her whole life. But I’m thinking it’s deeper than that too. You can’t tell me that Robin doesn’t have some serious internalized homophobia. Growing up where she did, heating the awful things people said about homosexuality, being told that gay people are dirty and perverted, there’s no way she didn’t internalize that at least a little. There’s more to not wanting to be seen than just fear of homophobia. It’s fear of her dirty little secret being out, of people knowing she’s “wrong.”

She feels fragile—made to be broken. And every evil word breaks her a little.

But then she meets Nancy Wheeler. Nancy Wheeler who played chicken against a speeding car with nothing but a pistol. Nancy Wheeler with guns in her closet. Nancy Wheeler who sawed they end off a shotgun and blasted Vecna to bits. Nancy Wheeler who stands up against assholes who try to put her down, no matter how powerful—and it makes Robin feel brave. She’s drawn to this powerful, incredible woman, who gives her comfort in small moments, holding her hand, offers reassurance, all in the same five minutes as killing monsters. She wants to be brave, and she wants to be vulnerable. There’s just something about the metaphor of cracking open her rib cage and offering her heart to Nancy—she wants Nancy to know who she is, deeply and truly, not just the mask she puts on (like in ST3).

And I'd give up forever to touch you

'Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment

And all I can breathe is your life

And sooner or later, it's over

I just don't wanna miss you tonight

Does this not sound like Robin pining over Nancy? Powerful, incredible Nancy? Werewolf Robin’s very own Angel of Death? The closest to heaven—and hell—that she’ll ever be?

Being lost in the little moments. That tiny hand hold in the Upside-Down. Laughing in Nancy’s car as they make their getaway from the asylum. The little high five after convincing that guy to let them in. She thinks about those moments, and she realizes she’s made a home in Nancy Wheeler—maybe it’s not intentional, but it’s happened. She doesn’t want to go back to her frankly probably neglectful parents, an empty home—she wants to go home to Nancy’s arms. She’d give up her life for that chance. And she doesn’t want to, because she knows there’s no way Nancy loves her the same way—she’s straight, right? She hates it, she hates the way she misses Nancy—she doesn’t want to.

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming

Or the moment of truth in your lies

When everything feels like the movies

Yeah, you bleed just to know, you're alive

I think Nancy lies. She lies in telling people that she’s okay, she’s fine, she can take care of herself—but Robin has heard this before, hell, she’s said all the same. But she sees the truth, because as much as Nancy puts up that mask and builds up her barriers—everything is made to be broken, including the walls between them, and Robin sees through the cracks, stares into Nancy’s eyes and knows she’s lying—knows there’s something deeper, sees the truth, sees “I need help too, but I don’t know how to ask for it” and so she provides it. And it hurts, but hey, the pain means she’s alive, right?

Also obligatory reference to the Movies one shot and Robin being a sucker for cheesy movie romances—she can’t help thinking this feels like a movie.

Then we return to the chorus, but there’s a note of hope to it, because she’s beginning to learn that Nancy is keeping things hidden too. They’re breaking each other down to build each other back up, learning each other’s darkest secrets in the middle of the night, holding each other through the nightmares and their darkest moments. Robin feels it bubbling up in her, growing with the bassline, until it’s spilling from her lips, and then Nancy knows. Nancy knows her dirty little secret, and Robin has to hold her breath, watching, waiting, hoping, because god she just wants to be known—

And Nancy just offers her hand, a soft smile, and tells Robin that she knows her. Nancy knows the messy, rambling mess that is Robin. She knows the intelligent mind, the heart of gold, the way she’s willing to give every bit of herself for the people she loves—and that matters more than anything so small minded as to think Robin is dirty for loving in a different way. And it’d be hypocritical wouldn’t it? And oh, Nancy’s eyes are wide and watering, impossibly deep—Robin swears she sees right to Nancy’s bared soul, sees the mirror—Nancy wants to be known too—and Robin realizes, oh

She isn’t alone. This whole time, she’s been known, because Nancy has felt the same way, this whole time.

[telamons]

does anyone has any book recs with one of the mc having the same personality as astarion??? (preferably fantasy)