#i think wild and rule are good friends and sometimes wild would forget his adventure didn't know about wolfie yet

[switchinspirals]

Shaping Desires: Tanner's Seductive Journey into Conformity

Tanner's 30th birthday had arrived with a bang – quite literally, considering the wild party he'd thrown at his Austin apartment. His friends cheered, clinked glasses, and danced the night away as if they could forget about the relentless march of time. Tanner reveled in the attention, a showman at heart. He'd always been the life of the party, the one who pushed boundaries and broke rules, unapologetically living life on his own terms.

As the music thumped in the background and colorful lights painted the room, Tanner stole a moment of solitude. He found himself staring out at the city lights through his apartment window, a pensive look on his face. The noise of the party seemed distant as his thoughts swirled.

"Troy," he said, turning to his more reserved friend, who had been quietly observing the festivities. "I've been thinking, man. I'm 30 now, and I feel like I'm stuck in some endless loop of fun and chaos. Is this all there is to life?"

Troy, a 32-year-old with a conservative disposition, gave Tanner a thoughtful glance. He'd been there for Tanner through every wild escapade and every daring adventure, but he'd always held onto his own beliefs and values.

"I get where you're coming from, Tanner," Troy replied, sipping his drink. "Life's about more than just parties and thrills. It's about finding purpose and meaning, too. Maybe it's time you explored some new avenues, more traditional ones."

Tanner raised an eyebrow, curious but slightly skeptical. "What do you mean, Troy?"

Troy chose his words carefully, knowing that this conversation might lead down an unconventional path. "Sometimes, change can be a good thing. Maybe there are aspects of a more traditional, conservative lifestyle that could bring you fulfillment. It's not about losing yourself, but about finding different facets of who you are."

Tanner pondered Troy's words as the party raged on around them. He couldn't shake the feeling that there might be more to life than the endless pursuit of excitement. Little did he know that his friend Troy had ideas of his own, ideas that would soon begin to subtly reshape Tanner's life. ***

A few weeks after his birthday bash, Tanner found himself driving out of the bustling city of Austin towards the tranquil suburbs. He hadn't visited Troy's place in a while, and he was looking forward to catching up with his friend. The chaos of his recent party had left him feeling a bit drained, and he longed for the calm that always seemed to envelop Troy's home.

Pulling up to the neat, well-kept house, Tanner couldn't help but notice how different it was from his own apartment. There were no blaring music and flashing lights here, just a serene quiet that seemed to stretch out into the horizon. He stepped out of his car and walked up to the front door, ringing the doorbell.

Troy greeted him with a warm smile, dressed in casual, conservative attire. It was a stark contrast to Tanner's usual party attire.

"Hey, Tanner! Come on in," Troy said, ushering his friend inside. The house was tastefully decorated with family photos and artwork, exuding an air of comfort and tradition.

As they settled into the cozy living room, sipping on coffee instead of the usual cocktails, Troy continued the conversation they'd started at Tanner's party.

"Tanner, you know, I've been thinking more about what we discussed that night," Troy said, his tone calm and measured. "Sometimes, people need a little guidance to discover new aspects of themselves."

Tanner glanced at his friend, curiosity piqued. "What are you getting at, Troy?"

Troy leaned in slightly, his eyes locked onto Tanner's. "I've been exploring some techniques that can help people find their true selves, their deeper purpose. It's not about changing who you are, but about unlocking hidden potentials."

Tanner felt a strange sensation wash over him as Troy spoke, a subtle shift in his perception. He nodded, suddenly more receptive to what his friend was saying.

"Tell me more," Tanner urged, his interest growing.

Troy's voice took on a soothing quality, his words wrapping around Tanner's mind like a gentle embrace. "Close your eyes, Tanner, and take a deep breath. Imagine a place of tranquility, a place where you can truly be yourself."

Tanner obeyed, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply. He pictured a serene, peaceful setting in his mind, a stark contrast to his usual frenetic lifestyle.

"In this place," Troy continued, "you can find balance, purpose, and a sense of fulfillment. Embrace it, Tanner. Let it guide you towards the man you've always been deep down."

As Tanner continued to listen to Troy's words, a profound sense of calm and clarity washed over him. It was as if a weight had been lifted, and he began to see the value in Troy's perspective.

Troy's soothing voice continued to weave its influence over Tanner's thoughts as they sat in the peaceful living room.

"In this place of tranquility," Troy murmured, "you can find clarity and purpose. It's a place where values like tradition and faith hold meaning, where the path you walk is guided by your own beliefs."

Tanner felt himself drawn into the mental image he had conjured, a place that seemed far removed from his usual whirlwind of parties and revelry. He couldn't help but be captivated by Troy's words, finding a certain comfort in the prospect of change.

"Tanner," Troy's voice persisted, gentle and persuasive, "imagine yourself embracing a more conservative approach to life, one where family, stability, and strong values are at the core of your existence."

Tanner's mind began to absorb these suggestions, and he felt a subtle transformation taking root. The party-loving, rebellious spirit within him seemed to quiet down, making space for thoughts and ideas he had never truly considered before.

Little did he know that his friend Troy was subtly weaving a web of influence, using the power of suggestion to shape his thoughts and desires, guiding him towards a more conservative, traditional, and masculine path. ***

Two weeks had passed since Tanner's last visit to Troy's suburban home, and the changes in Tanner's life had been subtle yet profound. He found himself thinking more about tradition, faith, and the values that had always been part of Troy's life. It was as if a new perspective had taken root within him, guiding his actions and decisions.

One evening, Tanner decided to visit Troy again. As he stepped into Troy's inviting home, he couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort and belonging in this peaceful haven. Tanner was dressed in conservative attire, reflecting his newfound appreciation for tradition and modesty.

"Hey, Troy," Tanner greeted his friend warmly, taking a seat in the familiar living room.

Troy, dressed similarly in conservative attire, smiled in return. "Tanner, it's good to see you again. I've been looking forward to our talks."

As their conversation unfolded, Tanner experienced a newfound sense of serenity and connection that he hadn't encountered before. The room's ambiance fostered an environment of genuine and candid discussion, amplifying the ongoing transformations within him.

Surprisingly at ease, Tanner decided to remove his shirt and pants, feeling a growing sense of comfort in the presence of his friend. To his astonishment, Troy did the same, and they found themselves both clad in matching undergarments: pristine white tank tops, snug white briefs, and pristine white socks. It was an unexpected coincidence that added a touch of intrigue to the moment, and Tanner couldn't help but find it curiously appropriate, sparking an unexpected sense of excitement within him.

Troy's gaze drifted appreciatively over Tanner's figure as he observed the unexpected mirroring of their attire. His eyes traced the contours of Tanner's body, from the crisp white tank top that hugged his chest to the snug white briefs that accentuated his form. There was a noticeable hint of amusement in Troy's smile as he quipped, "Well, it seems like we're on the same wavelength tonight, Tanner."

Tanner felt a warm flush spread across his cheeks as he met Troy's gaze. It wasn't just the room's temperature that was rising; it was the undeniable chemistry between them, intensified by their shared attire. His heart quickened its pace, and he couldn't help but notice a growing sensation of arousal stirring within him.

He tried to maintain the conversation, but his mind was increasingly preoccupied with the electric tension in the room. The subtle, unexpected matching of their undergarments had triggered something within him, a desire that had been dormant but was now awakening.

Troy's voice took on a softer tone as he continued, "Tanner, these changes in our lives, they can be profound and transformative. They can reveal parts of ourselves we never knew existed."

Tanner found himself drawn to Troy's words, not just for their wisdom but for the magnetic attraction he felt towards his friend. The air seemed charged with an unspoken desire, and he couldn't help but inch closer to Troy, their knees brushing against each other.

Troy's hand reached out, resting gently on Tanner's thigh, sending a jolt of desire through him. "Embracing this journey together," Troy said, his voice huskier now, "can be a beautiful and intimate experience, wouldn't you agree?"

Tanner swallowed hard, his arousal growing undeniable. He nodded, his voice shaky as he replied, "Yes, Troy, it feels...right."

[pocketramblr]

oooo okay writing game - balter, linked universe, whichever character(s) who choose

Balter- to dance gracelessly, but with enjoyment

Ask game

"The others have a lot of musical instruments, don't they." The Champion mused as the two of them explored the caves.

"You mean how the Veteran could supply an entire orchestra twice over?" Link- Traveler, the others called him, but it was so hard to stop thinking of yourself by your own name. He had no idea how the princesses had managed it- snorted.

"Well, that too." The Champion nodded, then stepped out of the way of a large boulder. "But I mean, the Old Man's ocarina, and Sky's harp, and the Pirate's stick thing."

Link considered it. The Captain and Smithy too- did that only leave one? "I don't think I've ever seen the Rancher play."

"Oh, he howls."

Link stopped, and let the Champion take the next Keese.

"He what?"

The Champion looked back at him, brows knitted together. "Oh right, you- you and the Caption weren't there that night. Uh, it's a howling type of singing. They do it in Ordon apparently. It's called yodeling."

He remembered he and the Captain's detour to the Fairy Fountain, and was not quite sad enough to regret missing out on hearing something new.

"Shame. The Captain is probably glad for it though, imagine his poor ears."

The Champion agreed with a laugh.

Link caught his boomerang, and they kept waking on, silence light between them.

He'd miss it, when this journey was over.

"So, do you sing?" The Champion asked, and Link thought maybe he wouldn't miss it that much, actually, as his ears began to burn.

Bless the darkness of the cave hiding their color.

"Ah, not really." Not in this form, not in front of others. "I can carry a tune on my whistle, but that's about it."

"Oh." The Champion seemed almost disappointed with that answer.

Had he said something wrong?

What could it have been?

"Do you sing?" Link tried to keep his confusion from his voice, but it probably bled through anyway.

The Champion snorted. "Definitely not."

The silence returned, almost as light as it was before, until it wasn't.

"I can't play any other music either. I don't remember if I ever could."

Oh.

He wanted to take the whistle from his bag and give it to the other- the same instinct Link had had for years now, to part with a gift whenever he left a child or friend. The Hylian hospitality he'd learned after it saved his life on his first adventure long ago.

But his hands were full, and he could hardly teach the Champion how to play it without a second whistle, and it wasn't really something he knew formally anyway.

Not enough to teach.

A different idea stuck him like an Ache.

"Do you dance?"

"Huh?" The Champion looked like he was the one struck with no warning. "No, why?"

"Well, if the Rancher howling counts as music, I figure dancing does too."

"Oh. Probably, but like I said, no idea how."

"I can teach you." Link offered.

The Champion actually tripped.

Link took out the last bokoblin before it could capitalize on that opening, and sent a wave of fire to clear the last of the monsters in the cave.

"You can dance?" His formerly favorite exploring partner asked.

Like it was the most shocking thing in the world. Like they didn't all know the kinds of things and clothes he kept in his bag.

"I'll have you know I was brought up right, despite my best efforts." He sheathed the magical sword and put his boomerang away. Impa and Zelda Oriana had insisted on that, and learning to dance actually hadn't been so bad.

There were no fancy clothes or faraway nobels here to be the parts that were bad. So why not try?

"Where?"

"Why not here?"

"Now?"

The Champion looked dazed. Link would be worried about a concussion if he didn't know there was no cause for one today.

"Yeah. Here, I can teach you a simple one. You kick on your heal, then the other, the the first," he demonstrated with three kicks, then clapped his hands twice, "and clap. Then you repeat starting with you other foot, and just alternate like that."

The Champion gave him the same look the Old Man sometimes gave the moon- not completely trusting.

Link tried for his most earnest face, the one he made when talking to the Red Sisters about getting a healing potion.

Finally, the other nodded and repeated the meter Link had shown.

They'd make an odd sight, if there were anyone else to see. A sixteen year old Calatian heir to Hyrule, eons after his motherland vanished and his homeland changed forever, clapping his hands and calling steps as a Champion Knight both one year and one century older than him tried to dance along.

Magic brimmed under their skin, he could feel the similar lighting and protection and lift and healing that thrummed in both their veins, pushed as their hearts raced to keep up with their quickening steps.

Apparently, sharing the same hero spirit did not mean they were better at being in time with each other.

Breathing heavy- the Champion panting- he stopped. "Alright, good. So you do that like, eight or nine or ten times," no, it was probably an even number. "Well, eight or ten times."

It wasn't six, right?

The Champion huffed, but Link charitably chalked it up to being out of breath instead of doubting his instructor.

"And then, the next step,"

"There's more?"

"Just one!"

"I thought you said it was easy." He complained.

Link hadn't. "I said it was simpler. So, you take your partners arm like this, and spin while you step in- actually, just spin. Then you turn around and spin the other way. Then you go back to the first step."

They practiced that a fair while, and Link nodded. "Good. Ok, I'll play the tune on my whistle, you keep going!"

The Champion faired well until it was time for the partner step, and Link didn't move to help him.

He stared, waving his arms wildly to ask what he should do.

Link took a moment to wave his hand in a circle, and the Champion correctly read it as being told to figure it out solo.

The little spinning jump he did on his own could not be called graceful, or in time with the music, but it certainly looked fun.

He went back to the first step, and after one more set, Link lowered the whistle. He might not have been dancing, but he was just as out of breath for playing that long.

"Good job." He grinned, and the Champion's beam back was bright enough to light the cave on his own.

Which was useful, because they heard Wolfie barking outside irritably a few minutes later, and had to hurry back through the tunnels before they were dragged out.

[hlcreators]

AUTHOR REC: only_angel_28 / @beau-soleil-louis​

Don’t forget to leave kudos and comment to show some love! ♡

a week and thirteen days (1k)

Harry falls in love with the morning sun. 

I can’t do this alone (sometimes I just need a light) (7.8k)

“Harry,” he says after another contemplative moment, “can I hug you?”

It’s been...well, Harry doesn’t actually know how long it’s been. Less than an hour, probably, but already Louis says his name like it’s safe in his mouth, and now he’s opening his arms like Harry could be safe there too.

“Please,” Harry nearly sobs, and sinks into him the way butter melts on toast. It’s an apt metaphor, really, because what Louis is giving him is as essential and sustaining as a loaf of bread to a starving man. His basic need for physical affection is as vital as his need for sustenance, for sleep, and he can’t believe he’s allowed himself to ignore it for so long.

Or: Harry is having a rough time. Louis is the kind stranger who makes him smile again.

I think I’m falling (I’m falling for you) (6.8k)

Louis is a disaster gay on a skateboard. Harry is a beautiful, quirky stranger on a bicycle. Their first encounter really makes a splash.

Bloom (just for you) (495)

“Do you ever think about boys?”

The words fall from Louis’ lips casually, but they’re fragile like a gossamer thread, a single silken strand from a spider’s web of labyrinthine thoughts. They’re the product of literal months of careful introspection, of soul-searching and agonizing and over-thinking. They’re words that he’s never dared to utter aloud, a mirror of his own swirling inner-turmoil of thoughts. Thoughts he previously held tightly to his chest, locked away in his heart along with all his other feelings regarding his best friend.

*Or the arrival of spring brings a new beginning for Harry and Louis.

dopamine (7.8k)

Louis honestly doesn’t know how he gets himself into these types of situations.

Well, actually, that’s a lie. He’s doing this because he needs the money, and because he’s curious. And, okay, maybe because he might be a little bit lonely too. He has always had what his mother affectionately calls an “adventurous spirit.” Couple that with being a (tragically single) broke grad student and voila! here he is scrawling his signature on a release form provided by the university’s sociology department. Essentially, he is agreeing to snog a stranger on camera for the sake of science.

Shouldn’t be a problem, right? All he has to do is lock lips with a (hopefully) fit bloke, collect his money, and be on his way. Easy peasy. Little does he know, fate has other plans for him in the form of one adorably quirky art student who goes by the name of Harry Styles.

How Would You Feel (If I Told You I Loved You) (81k)

An AU inspired by the music video for Ed Sheeran's song Perfect featuring two idiots who are too thick to see that their friendship is anything but platonic, lots of pining, too many terms of endearment to count, a wedding, slow dancing, a couple of steamy hot tub moments, karaoke, snow, a healthy dose of cuddling, love confessions, and Harry and Louis being quite generous to each other.

*Or the one where Harry has been in love with his best friend for four years, and New Year's Eve at his family's holiday home in Switzerland is perfect for finally telling Louis how he feels.

Breathe Me (13k)

The story of what happens when Harry finds a stranger sleeping inside the car his late grandfather left him.

“Louis?” Harry queries softly, his voice nothing more than a whisper. “Why are you living in my car?”

Louis sighs, and this time it’s laced with a mixture of sadness and exhaustion, the sound of it tugging at Harry’s heartstrings. “Long story,” he says finally with a weak smile.  

“Will you tell me?” Harry prods gently, his demeanor akin to that of someone approaching a wild animal with their arms outstretched in a gesture of submission. “You don’t have to, like—I mean…it’s just, I’m a pretty good listener, and you seem like maybe you could use a friend?”

“What gave me away?” Louis jokes dryly.

*Or the one where Harry has a broken heart, Louis has a broken home, and all it takes is one night together for them to fall in love.

You got that something, I got me an appetite (5.9k)

After years of being forced to hide their relationship, Harry and Louis decide to come out with a bang.

Shape of You (11k)

“Seriously?” Surely, Harry must be joking. Louis arches a skeptical brow and snaps the waistband of Harry’s joggers playfully. “What exactly do you have down there, Styles? I know you’ve got four nipples, d’ya have a couple extra bollocks as well or summat?”

“No!” Harry shrieks, his voice bordering on shrill. “No,” He repeats a little quieter, calmer, “I just—I’m, er, kinda…big, I guess.”

Louis rolls his eyes in fond exasperation. “That’s hardly a problem, curly.”

*Or Harry is insecure about a certain rather large part of his anatomy that is apparently intimidating to the point where it has actually scared off potential shags. When he ends up confessing this to his best friend and roommate, Louis takes it upon himself to prove that Harry’s size doesn't have to be a curse, and decides to help show him just how perfect he is.

Please Be Naked (17k)

Louis starts squirming, desperately needing something to do with his hands. Needing to do anything, really, to distract him from the perfect male specimen standing naked in front of him. In the end, the only thing he can do is strip out of his own jeans and briefs, which he does with trembling, clumsy fingers, his heart beating out a violent, chaotic rhythm in his chest the entire time.

He hears Harry’s sharp intake of breath, and slowly raises his eyes from where he was staring at his own bare feet to meet his gaze.

“So,” Harry says bashfully, his voice gone even deeper somehow. “We’re naked.”

“Yup,” Louis squeaks.

“You okay?”

No!

“Yup,” Louis repeats, sounding just as unstable as he did the first time.

This is the last favor Louis Tomlinson is ever doing for Zayn Malik. (Because, after today, he’ll be dead, but that’s neither here nor there.)

*Or the one where Louis agrees to help out Zayn with one of his art projects and ends up getting much more than he bargained for.

Hey I Heard You Were A Wild One (If I Took You Home It’d Be A Homerun) (12k)

"Are you out?” Louis huffs a long suffering sigh as he studies Harry from the other side of the bar, the neon from the beer signs making his eyes glow an unnatural shade of blue, and causing Harry to question - not for the first time tonight - if he is real or just some fever dream-esque fantasy conjured up by Harry’s alcohol addled brain.

“You’re fucking kidding me right?” Harry laughs incredulously.

Louis is resolute in his posture as he continues to observe Harry, the slight arch of a brow his only acknowledgement of Harry’s question. That’s fine, Harry decides, it was mostly rhetorical anyway.

“A gay cowboy who rides for a living, can you imagine all the Brokeback Mountain jokes I’d have to endure on a daily basis? I don’t really fancy being compared to Jake Gyllenhaal.”

A hint of a smirk tugs at the corners of Louis’ pursed lips. “Now you’re the one who must be joking, because you are so clearly Heath Ledger in that scenario.”

*Or Harry came to the bar to forget. Louis gives him a night to remember.

Your Love Is My Turning Page When Only The Sweetest Words Remain (8.4k)

“Crying already, Styles?” Louis chides him teasingly, unable to contain the smile that’s breaking across his face.

“So what if I am? What are you going to do about it?” Harry sniffs indignantly.

Louis makes a show of pretending to consider this, steepling his fingers in front of his chest and giving Harry a contemplative once-over.

“Marry you.” He decides, smirking at Harry.

“Guess you won’t be able to call me Styles much longer then.” Harry counters, biting down on his own barely-contained grin.

“Guess not.” Louis agrees happily.

Say You Won’t Let Go (5.7k)

Harry hates flying. Louis is the kind stranger who helps him when he gets sick in the airport restroom. The rest, as they say, is history.

Back To You (5.8k)

"Hello?" His voice came out all high and breathy like an anxious school girl, and he cringed internally at how wrecked he sounded already.

"Lou?"

Harry's voice was the same as ever, deeper than the sea and somehow both gravelly and smooth as silk. Harry was full of infuriating little contradictions like that. It drove Louis crazy. He had spent a good portion of his life questioning if Harry Styles was actually even human; on paper he just didn't make sense. He was an enigma, an anomaly, the exception to every rule.

*After dropping his new single, "Back To You" Louis gets a text from Harry inquiring about the true inspiration for the song.

[abizarreyodelingincident]

Our Nightly Confidant 5

Four steps in my shoes

Four feels strongly.

In general, as a rule, but also in this specific situation, where sweat sticks his hair to his forehead and the pegasus boots chaff from constant overuse. From the slight burn of his arm muscles that nonetheless keep swinging the Four Sword.

Amazingly, the emotion at the forefront of his mind cannot be easily and neatly assigned to one facet of him. Annoyance isn't exclusive to any one side of him, quite the contrary. And the 'you can go die!' disdain is a taaaaad too specific as well.

White paws sweep at him and barely miss the top of his head. Would have hit Ezlo, if this had been his first adventure. The pang of nostalgia doesn't help his focus much.

Small bursts of magic and swings of his boomerang sting enough to keep his enemy on the backfoot. Behind him, a few roots twist enough for an opening beneath the trunk. If he can just...

The paw slams inches away from where he was standing a second earlier.

Urgh. It had to happen after they marched all day in search of civilization, didn't it?

Well, nothing to it, Four adjusts his sword and glares back at the slitted eyes trailed on him.

Which is when the loudest, most thunderous bark he ever heard rips the air in half and hammers in his eardrums. The white monster (cat) yowls in fright, fur straight up in horror, back arched, and it sprints right up a tree.

Wolfie is a familiar sight, and a welcome one at that.

But some instinctive part of him that is more Minish than Hylian can't help grip the Four Sword tighter.  From this perspective, Wolfie has more in common with Wild's divine beasts than a regular animal. His claws look about as tall as Four himself. And at the moment, the wolf is displaying a mouth full of fangs that promise a painful death.

He doesn't blame the cat for scampering. He's seen what those fangs can do to a throat. Or a wrist. Or an ankle. Not, really, he thinks the cat shows great wisdom in getting the hell out of Wolfie's range.  

But, because he is a Hero of Courage, he flips the sword in his hands, sheathes it and waves his arms.

“Twilight!”

The shift is instantaneous, and a little amazing to witness. The ears perk up, the posture straightens from its crouch, the teeth all disappear behind the black lips. It's a flip of Pacci's cane, a turn on a rupee, and there's the big beast their group loves.

“You okay there, Smithy?” Twilight asked, sniffing him for signs of injuries.

It's strange, hearing Twilight's voice coming through the sort of mental-bond-language of the Minish. Useful though. He's not certain he currently possesses the patience for some games of charades with a wolf.

“No injuries.” He puts a hand on the damp nose even as a burst of hot air washes over him. “Just a bit out of breath.”

“Right.”

It's not a doubtful tone, but there's some Time-patented exasperation in there.

“I would have been fine, you know?” says the part of Four that is a bit younger. “I dealt with lots of monsters even at this size.”

(Not Wolfie size though, that he thinks might be beyond him when shrunk.)

The flat look he receives makes him want to squirm.

He's too controlled for that.

“Yes, yes, I know.” He waves off the implied question. “I thought the innkeeper's cat was still inside.”

“He was. But after he mewled a bit, his owner let him out. And when I didn't see you... I had a feeling.”

Four wants to hit his head against a tree. Animals always were more aware of the scent of Minish magic. Many eyed him curiously when he walked through town. He should have known the cat would want to stalk after him. Probably thinking he knew where a village was hidden. He's going to have internal arguments about this all night.

“Cats are all bastards.”

To Four's amazement, Twilight's tail curls between his legs, his ears drooping. He rather looks more the guilty dog part than the majestic beast he insists he is.

“... But they're so cuddly.”

“When you're bigger than them, maybe,” Four deadpans. “Sneaky little shits.”

Twilight's whine is absolutely ridiculous and enough to make him snicker.

“Fine, fine. I'm not deaf, I hear what they say. Not as bad as cuccos, though.” Twilight's gaze wanders off to a faraway place. “Nothing is as bad as those psychotic birds.”

They lose a moment reliving their trauma over the feathered fiends.

Twilight shakes it off first. He lies down, his body like a hill of dark fur before Four, and hints at his back. Any protest Four might have had before dies in the face of his aching legs. He can fight off monsters at this size, but it's unreasonably more complicated. And he is not in the mood to stab spiders in the face tonight.

The fur is silky under his fingers, which is comforting but also a bit of a pain. Climbing means parting the coat of dark hairs and finding grip against skin. Sometimes, the body under him flinches or trembles, like Twilight is fighting off the urge to roll over. Four imagines it's quite similar to tickling. So he hurries up and makes his way up to the top of Twilight's head. Between the ears and roughly around the markings on his forehead.

Satisfied, Twilight stands, and the whole world blurs like he's still using his pegasus boots. A few more steps are needed before Four's body adjusts to the speed, and then he can relax. Twilight's safe.

And, he notes, not heading straight for the inn.

“We noticed the looks, you know,” Twilight says, because he's one of those busybodies that can't help mother cucco everyone around him till they are 'right as rain over a spring'.

“So?” he replies, even, practiced.

(Zelda had questions, at first, then orders that were swiftly obeyed, when in her sight. He hasn't told her that yet.)

“... How many of them do that?”

Do what? He wants to ask. The inn's owner had been quite polite, very careful in avoiding certain words around Four. Indeed so careful that Four could feel their syllables get more and more defined by the innkeeper's silence.

“Whisper?” he settles for. “A few. I'm weird, I know. Shorter than some kids, but can lift a hammer to forge. Own my business outside Castle Town, only shows up for groceries, talks to myself sometimes and stares at empty spots on shelves. I don't know, I suppose they expected me to apprentice beforehand, but there was a kingdom to save and what did that matter then?”

He punches the ground next to him before remembering too late it is Twilight's head.

The growl doesn't last. But the first few words he says are a bit more bitten out than the tone implies.

“There's a kid in my village. Younger than you. Couldn't lose the baby fat in his face for the longest time.” Twilight snorts, and his tail wags a bit. “And he's smart, really smart, a lot more mature than his older brother too.”

Four has a feeling that's partially due to the older brother's personality, but holds his tongue.

“People whispered behind his back. 'That boy is so creepy.'”

“Fey-touched,” Four says before he can hold back the red in him.

That one hurt. He's picked up habits from the Minish, he's aware. Little things like leaving keystones lying around for other kids or tiptoeing minish rings in the grass. But for those differences to matter so much, he hadn't expected until the first time the words had been floating around him.

“Ah,” Twilight says, followed by a whole lot of nothing.

Crickets around them sing. He can almost see some Minish putting a collar on the bugs to bring them home for a concert. Moving from behind stalks of grass, praying to the moon and the goddesses.

Then, Twilight says: “That takes me back.”

Four stumbles through the fur, his hands grasping on some new strands, but he can't tell if his unbalance is due a jolt in their steps or to the enormity of the idea. Twilight, the stereotypical rancher, seen as an outsider?

He tries, but all his brain conjures up is a much shorter version of Twilight dragging goats by the horns. That and dancing (badly) to the melody of a grass whistle.

Even from his spot atop Twilight's head, the eye roll is obvious despite being out of sight. “The only Hylian in a village of Humans?” he drawls. “Found as a toddler lost in the woods? Hardly able to speak for a while?”

Oh, Four thinks, that'd do it.

“They don't have the right to say that to you,” Twilight growls. “You're their hero.”

He could bask in the warmth. Lets himself lie down on Twilight and forget all about the events of tonight.

Curiosity wins, or well, violet does. “What did you do?”

“Nothing special? Just stayed the same and let them talk.”

Four's eyes bug out. “That's it? Nothing? How does that change anything?”

“When you're you, Four... When you're a good person regardless of rumors and whispers... Idiots don't stop talking, but the ones that are worth it stop listening.” A wolfish grin breaks out on Twilight's face. “Besides, you should have seen their black eyes after Rusl heard them say it to my face. After that... well, they could have called me the King of Evil and it wouldn't have mattered. Knowing you got someone in your corner's better than hollow praise from idiots.”

Four blushes.

He forgot for a bit, and he'll apologize to Zelda when he sees her, but it's true. Whenever he recalls that moment, the guard's words aren't ever the same. The phrasing lost all its power, outshone by the impassioned defense and the sheer anger wielded by his friend.

His back straightens. And he allows himself some childish pride in having the Princess of Hyrule in his corner. What do they have to beat that?

Twilight rumbles a laugh. “So... yeah, ignore them. Put them in their place if you want, the goddesses know you have the strength to do it, but that won't change their minds about anything. If you want some peace of mind, discard the idiots.”

Companionable silence falls between them. Four doesn't feel the need to speak after that bit of reassurance. They circle the woods, avoiding Hylians late on the road and monsters alike. Twilight's seemingly content just taking him on a ride, and Four's loath to admit he wants the moment to last a little longer.

They're not too far back from their starting point when he decides to ask: “About that kid?”

“Malo?”

“Yeah, him, how does he deal with it?”

Twilight does not answer right away. He first jumps over some large, gnarled roots and growls at a fox that seemed a bit too curious about the smell of Minish magic. Four's grateful for the time to calm his pounding heart.

“Well, Malo just stares at them until they get uncomfortable. Then he asks them what they're looking for. It never seems to affect him too much.” – discomfort hits at that, and Four can't tell why – “But, well, it also happened in front of me, you know? And I take after my Pa. So I might have knocked a couple of heads together in Casle Town. Followed by a strong talking to. Not that Malo appreciated that I ran off some of his customers.” A sigh. “That kid, I swear.”

Four grimaces. That type of 'customers'. Will think they bless his forge with their presence, praise him to all ends, then turn around and whisper. “I'm sure he's grateful inside.”

“Eh, I hope so, but it's his call in the end. Can't live his life for him.” Some muscles roll, and Four gets the impression of a shrug. “Speaking of, what do you want to do, Smithy?”

The question takes him by surprise, and it's silly that he didn't expect it.

He knows that Twilight would spend the night outside with him if he asks. They're no strangers to outdoor camping and the woods of his era are less dangerous than most. Wolfie would intimidate most if not all the creatures that live inside it.

But it would be illogical to sleep in the woods when they have more than enough rupees to pay for some rooms in a local inn.

Four is reasonable. It's one of his trademarks as a Hero. Mature for his age. Calm. Collected. It's how he's taken seriously as an adventurer. Why would he shatter an illusion that useful? Over some mild ostracization?

'Serve it cold,' says one quarter of him.

Another sides with Twilight. Their big brother made a good point. They couldn't be bothered by every single ungrateful person out there. They'd always exist, so let them stew in jealousy and paranoia and fear. He has the favor of the Princess, his best friend. What does he need anger for against a countryside shop owner?

But, the blue in him counters with an hammer-like argument: 'No, the best revenge is both.'

The others would be a little mad, he thinks. A little.

He's usually mature enough not to get in trouble. He's due for some insanity and explosions. Wild would back him up here. And it might be his voice in his head that pushes the words out of his mouth.

“So, not that I haven't listened to a word you said, but, hypothetically, if I needed help knocking heads together...”

“How many heads? Wars mentioned an interesting technique he learned from his sparring with some Sheikah general the other night. Though, if you'd rather, I can say, without boasting, that a lot of grown men weep at this form. It's embarrassing for everyone, I tell you.”

Four snorts, struck by mischief. “We're going to need to find a stump. I might have a plan.”

Yes, Four contemplates, the glint of wolf fangs under the moonlight is just as terrifying as he figured it would be. He can't wait.

                                                        ***

Legend is silently debating with Sky over the right to punch the innkeeper in the face. It's a fierce debate communicated entirely through raised eyebrows, scrunched up nose, muted snarls and meaningful looks.

The others' patience is steadily fraying at the edges. It's especially noticeable with their youngest. There are fireworks going off on Wind's face. The knife cutting his slab of meat to pieces steadily stabs into it every time the innkeeper's mouth opens.

“And where are you fine young men traveling to?” he says with a customer pleaser smile.

'Fine young men'. Ah! There's a thing he didn't say about Four. The fucking nerves of this man.

“Far,” Time replies, his tone even, but his expression thoroughly unimpressed.

“Ah, yes, of course...” the innkeeper says agreeably. “You, huh, you'll be going with the, ahem, with the boy, I imagine?”

How dare he sound hopeful? And 'boy'?! This man's livelihood is owed to the smithy! And he doesn't even have the excuse of mind control!

A hint of shame tickles the back of his mind, when he had first heard the innkeeper talking. He had sounded nothing like the ones from his era, who sometimes refused him entry outright on the basis of old and false accusations.

This current attitude was, technically speaking, a strict improvement over that.

But does the man have to come alive and become so at ease serving them food whilst the Hero of this land take a walk outside? Alone, at night?

Legend grunts into his mug. The rancher left after the smithy, so that ought to solve the 'feelings' question. A bit of a stick-in-the-mud he might be, but Twilight's one of the few he would trust to help navigate difficult feelings. He's got the patience for it, unlike a lot of them who tackle everything the way they do a dungeon, with reckless abandon.

Yet, in the cozy warmth of the fire in the hearth, over the hesitant plucking of the minstrel's chords, a howl suddenly calls to the moon.

They, alone, do not tense.

The howl echoes a second time, much louder. Closer.

The innkeeper shoots them a desperate look, but Legend suddenly realizes that he is blind, and possibly deaf. He has no reason to stand up, much less draw his sword. And, would Farore look at that, his condition is contagious!

The hinges creak as they inch open.

If Legend were not so experienced, he might have been nervous. But he's better than that. He leans back in his seat, places a hand on Hyrule's shoulder, and sips his ale.

There in the doorway, cut in shadows with the moon as backdrop, riding on a large grey wolf, Four raises both arms high in the air.

“Fear my unnatural power,” he says with as ominous a voice he can produce.

Warriors snorts, cheeks reddened by alcohol, and he gives a thumbs-up to their smith, despite the owner's pale complexion.

The mugs left on the table begin to shake. Oh, this is gonna be good.

It starts with a pair of squirrels and a owl, neither obeying their instincts in favor of swooping inside the inn. Followed by a handful of moles, fireflies and stray dogs.

In a flash of white, the inn's cat bolts inside the inn, meowing, till it reaches its owner's legs and climbs onto him. It perches itself on his bald head, seconds before the first deer bounces inside the building.

Epona breaks the first table.

But the three raccoons lunging after his cat are what make the owner scream.

Legend guffaws in his ale.

[creativerogues]

How I Dealt With: Alignment VS Player Actions

So I’m just going to go into it with a recent example of how the Player’s Actions actively contradicted the Alignment of the Character they’re playing.

Hard Hat, the Tortle Wizard and Necromancer, needed to find 5,000 Gold Pieces in 2 Days to give to another Wizard, so that that Wizard can scribe a Spell Scroll that Hard Hat needs.

So rather than asking the rest of the Party, rather than thinking it through in a way that went with his Character, Hard Hat’s Player chose to act in a way that, while not directly, opposed his Character's Alignment as a Neutral Character.

Hard Hat’s Player chose to go out into the Town of Fostin, the Town the group is currently in, and through a combination of Charm Person, Suggestion and Enthrall, force the rather rich townsfolk of the City to give him their money, like he was some kind of wizardly highwayman...

And while I, as the DM of that Session, did allow him to do this, I told him that Hard Hat’s Alignment as a Character has now shifted, from Neutral, to Neutral Evil...

Now for some of you reading this, however you run your D&D Games, it might sound a bit weird that I, as the DM and someone who is not that in control of the actions of the Players, is allowed to change a Player Character’s Alignment on the spot, but there was a reason as to why I did so...

The reason I’m ruling this as a “temporary” alignment change is because the actual Player’s literal justification for these acts is: “Well the ends justify the means, we’re hurting people to help people.”

And as he was already a Neutral Character, a shift that steps him towards the Evil Side for this Section of the Adventure definitely seemed appropriate after this…

After all, no one who calls themselves a Hero would willingly force an innocent person into giving them money.

But why only Neutral Evil? Well not just because his Character was already Neutral, though that did help a lot, but because this was an action that Hard Hat’s Player thought was the only option, despite it not being the only option.

He had two days of downtime to find 5,000 Gold Pieces, and in the mind of Hard Hat’s Player, he thought the only way to get that 5,000 Gold was through nefarious means...

But if he had just conversed with the group a whole, or simply asked for help from the other Players, they might of discovered a much easier way to get that money on time to the Wizard that asked for it.

Hard Hat had a limited time frame to achieve something that Hard Hat’s Player thought was practically impossible. And while Hard Hat did achieve it in the end, the Player themselves had to justify why this needed to be done.

After all: The ends justify the means, don’t they?

There’s also another example I’d like to give where another player in my most recent session proposed something that I thought would directly oppose his ideals and methods.

Nemorith, who has been delightfully nicknamed Nemo, was returning to the Ship the Party had gained. Nemorith had been away from the Party for over two and half months, on his own adventures with Hard Hat the Necromancer during parts of his leave.

Now, Nemo is a Druid, or as I sometimes call him in my Games: a Wild-Man.

Nemo had lived in the mountains of the Himmelblas Region of my World for over a decade, and had grown up to respect nature, while also remaining neutral, and understanding that violent acts do occur in nature, but only for the needs of food and survival.

This gained him the Alignment of Lawful Neutral. He had a Code, an Oath you might say, and he stuck to it as much of possible, even finding some extremely over complicated ways to deal with issues even though the simplest way to deal with them was: Kill the Bad Guy.

But in this Session, Nemo returned to learn that everything had changed...

Kentucky, the Aarockra Barbarian with a Southern Accent, had become Captain of the Ship during Nemo’s leave, and the Crew took to him well over the 2+ Months in-game that Nemo had been gone.

Foot, the Tabaxi Bard had become quite renowned in the City, performing at taverns and gaining quite the gold pile and renown during Nemo’s leave and levelling up to 5th Level while Nemo was gone, gaining some new Spells and Magics...

Whinny, the Kenku Rogue had learnt to write, and even talk in semi-coherent sentences while Nemo was gone. She had learnt to write Common and can write short sentences now and even speak them while almost making sense.

Everyone was slightly different, while Nemorith remained the same, and he didn’t like it.

And so when the Group threw a Party to celebrate Nemo’s return, he hated it.

He wanted to leave the Party, just get on the ship and sail somewhere else and hopefully go back to normal, but that wasn’t happening.

Instead Foot was performing on-stage to a packed bar, Kentucky was lifting beer barrels that weighted more than most of the Party over his head, and Whinny was writing letters and painting banners to saying “Welcome Home”, writing in Common for the first time Nemorith had seen it.

And he actually grew jealous, everyone was suddenly better than him, they knew more magics, became better at their skills. While he and his Tortle Wizard Friend Hard Hat were just... Surviving...

And this caused a conversation between Hard Hat and Nemorith that I didn’t expect, where Nemorith proposed something to Hard Hat that I thought deserved an Alignment Change.

He proposed that Hard Hat cast Modify Memory on Foot, the Tabaxi Bard, so that Foot would forget all the renown and magic he had gained over the past two and half months.

And when Hard Hat refused to do so, Nemorith attacked Hard Hat.

The rest of the Party, who were still celebrating and partying (just on the ship instead of in the tavern), heard Nemo and Hard Hat shouting at each other, and heard a scuffle.

The situation at that point escalated to the point where Nemorith was locked in one of the bedrooms on the ship until he calmed down.

He was locked in there for almost three days...

So why did I change his alignment?

Well, because of what he said, the way he acted and what he did.

A Character that was Lawful Neutral and had a personal code that stopped him from injuring others, was suddenly attacking his own party members because they didn’t do what he said.

And he broke his own code, he wanted to to destroy a fellow party members process by casting Modify Memory to make that Party Member forget all the new magic and experience they’ve earned, and essentially level them back down to Level 4.

This caused me to change Nemorith’s Alignment to Chaotic Neutral, since he no longer seemed to care about his personal code in that moment, just wanted something, and when he was denied it, he lashed out at the Party in anger.

Now, there is a happy ending, Nemorith apologised to the rest of the Party, and the Group had a pretty deep and emotional talk on why they should stick together and what it means to be good.

But during those three days that Nemo was locked in his room, punching and kicking at the walls in anger, Nemorith’s Alignment, at least in my mind, was Chaotic Neutral...

I hope this Post has been helpful to you. I honestly think the DM having partial control over the PC’s Alignments and the ability to shift and change a Character’s Alignments based on the Player’s Actions is Neat and works if both the DM and Player agree that a Character’s actions in a game are deserving of an Alignment Change.

And if you need even more examples, take Vox Machina from Critical Role.

Vex’s Alignment shifted after she stole a Broom of Flying from a fellow Party Member (SPOILERS?) and Pike’s Alignment shifted after she ruthlessly killed a Creature in a way that her Deity didn’t like....

But anyways I hoped you liked this Post, and if you think I should do more Posts like this or more Posts on the topic of Alignment, let me know!

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

Girl you need (G.D.)

Summary: Best friends to lovers don’t always work out in your favor.

Warnings: angst, swearing, implied smut

Word count: 3200

Part 2

What’s that saying? Friends to lovers is the best way to build a lasting relationship? Maybe it’s just what I’ve been saying my whole life in an effort to convince myself the feelings I’ve developed were a start of a fairy tale and not a tragedy.

It seems as if every time I had feelings for a guy, they remained unreciprocated. I’d get the textbook line: you’re too perfect to end up with a guy like me, or the occasional: you deserve the world, but I can’t give it to you. Whichever excuse they used, the end result never changed: I wasn’t good enough.

I was never the girl the guys choose and whether I liked it or not, it started to truly affect me.

Confidence slowly dwindled, my beliefs about love faded and worst of all...I stopped letting people in. I’ve shut my heart inside a treasure chest like a precious gem, locking it and forgetting where the key is. A small part of me knowingly lost the key, because if you don’t let people in you won’t get hurt. And I was tired of the hurt.

But then he came into my life.

I found that every question I had, he became the answer to it. The key to my treasure slowly came out of hiding and he personally dusted it off. Now he holds it in the palm of his hand and I am terrified just as I am excited about the prospect of finally being the one.

Grayson...

He is an ambivert, a social butterfly unlike me. He commands every room he enters, while I’m usually hiding in the corner. His aura attracts people by nature and I’m not even sure he understands how powerful his charisma is.

He is intuitive, but he doesn’t let his mind rule, rather his heart. He likes to listen to his heart instead of logic, which is why he gets hurt more often than he’d like to admit. Wearing his heart on his sleeve has marked him a target for those who have anything but good intentions in mind. I know he suffers for it, but I’m always there to make him laugh. Regardless of what I’m doing, I drop everything and help him nurse his wounds. I’ve always been the type that followed my heart, until I forced my brain to step up to protect the weak muscle inside me. He taught me to listen to my heart again, but to bring my brain along for the ride as well.

Grayson is an open book, pages filled with stories I ache to read and a main character I could never get enough of. He’s the type that inspires, bringing out the best in people. Instead of overthinking he overfeels, he’s determined and passionate, altruistic, but he burns out easily. I’m there to help him heal when that happens, whether it be a movie weekend in or a wild adventure where I’m a 100% sure I’m going to die most of the time.

He’s very determined and passionate about things and people he loves. I’ve felt it first hand. He’s got so much love inside him that it’s bursting out the seams, but most of it goes in vain. I tend to be the one to grab any leftovers and bask in his caring nature.

Grayson and I have a connection that surpasses the physical, a deep emotional tether that I’ve been relying on heavily. While we’ve never been more than good friends, the lines between friendship and love have been blurred for the longest time now and I no longer knew where the scale will end up once its tips over.

Sometimes it’s his arm around me, resting on my shoulders casually or his hand on the small of my back that remains in its spot for so long I feel his touch turn to fire. Other times it’s his fingers trailing up and down my spine as I nestle in his side, my head on his chest and his lips ghosting my forehead as his breath moves a few stray hairs out the way. Maybe it’s about the look in his steadfast brown eyes that seem to soften whenever they rest upon me, or the striking smile his lips spread into whenever I walk into the room. Perhaps it’s the warmth of his touch and how I’ve never felt safer than in his embrace, but most of all, it’s about the way he didn’t pull away when we accidentally kissed.

Both going for a cheek, Grayson and my lips connected and although I felt my brain falter and my heart jump, I was sure he’d step back and rub the back of his neck nervously as an awkward chuckle graced my ears. But he didn’t. He barely even flinched before his lips lustfully captured mine for a deeper kiss and his eyes closed as we got lost in each other. I nibbled on his bottom lip tenderly, dragging it between my teeth to assert dominance and the moment his soft flesh escaped my hold, Grayson made sure I knew he was the dominant one. He gripped my thigh tightly, turning needy and every move I made that resulted in our lips parting was a new groan rolling off his lips. We became a mess of tangled limbs, sweat and heavy breathing, moans I’ve stifled by biting into his shoulder as each of his thrusts made me feel like I’ll unravel. It was perfect.

If I knew what I know now, I’d never let it go down.

“I’m just so tired.” I mumble into the phone, making up an excuse to ditch my nightly outing so I could spend the night with the guys, hoping Grayson and I can talk about what happened that night.

When I woke up the next morning, all I found of him was a note on the pillow where his head used to be, the sheets on his side of the bed cold and empty without him.

Last night was just what I needed. It was perfect.

Not exactly the most romantic thing he’d ever said as I’ve seen and heard him flirt with girls. The note just didn’t sit well with me. Knowing him, I half expected to wake up to banana pancakes and a big cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows. A part of me truly believed this night would make him want to bridge the blurred lines between us and finally try and see if there was something to explore at all.

Before last night, I had never let myself feel anything for him no matter how hard my very soul wanted to give in and love him with every fiber of my being. Last night all my doubts have gone, all contingency plans ruined and my damn key was no longer mine.

But Grayson always says he’s not looking for something serious right now. He keeps saying he’s had too many relationships that poisoned him from start to finish and he needed some fresh air and fun.

Was I that fun? Would he do that to his best friend?

After not hearing from him at all, I decided to drop by and initiate the talk myself. I need to know where we stand.

“He’s not home.” Ethan shrugs, letting me inside and I bite my lower lip.

“Thought he’d be here.” I mumble to myself, wondering where he went. I didn’t have to wonder for long as Ethan had the answer prepared for me.

“He’s out with his girlfriend. Tessa, remember?” Ethan raises a brow in question, looking at me a little more intently than usually. His brown eyes scan what’s most likely a shocked, hurt look in mine and I see his frown form slowly and deeply.

“He, uh. He didn’t say they were official. Or anything really. Thought she was just a friend.” I stumble over my words, unsure what to say when my brain feels as if it’s just been drained of any shred of intelligent thought.

“They’ve been dating for a month, Y/N.” Ethan informs me and I find my serious demeanor change into a hurt, almost panicked, high pitched giggle followed by tears in my eyes.

“You good? Kinda scaring me there.” Ethan takes a step closer, pocketing his phone for the first time since I came in. He’s always on that damn thing. My outburst must have truly scared him. I’m never the one to lose my composure.

“I. I’m fine.” I manage to slip out between the giggles, placing a hand over my chest as a ragged breath comes through to my burning lungs.

What the hell am I supposed to say? I think I’m in love with your brother who is also my best friend but he also never told me he’s official with someone and we had sex last night? I don’t think that’s a good idea.

“If you’re so fine, then why are you crying?” Ethan counters, outstretching both arms, leaving his chest wide open for me to fall back on.

And I do.

His arms wrap around me in a protective way, his chin resting atop my head as he listens to my giggles turning into sobs. The strength he holds me up with is enough for me to feel the uncontrollable trembling inside me had now become evident outside as well.

We moved to his bedroom, lying in bed in embrace as I soaked his shirt and smeared make up all over it. The very make up I put on to look cute for his twin.

He waited patiently for me to run out of tears to cry, slowly until my sobs stopped and my chest hurt with the ragged, sharp, pained intakes of breath that came erratically in comparison to his even breathing. My head hurt, my sniffles forced me to blow my nose multiple times and now I had no more in me to move. So I allowed myself to close my eyes and rest on Ethan’s chest as his hand rubbed my back gently, moving in soothing circles.

The door swung open, startling me into opening my eyes and I quickly sit up and face the source that was blatantly unaware of my presence and blurted out a request before focusing on me with widened eyes and parted lips.

“Ethan, turn up the music cause I’m about to f - Y/N?!” He says my name like it’s the most natural thing in the world, like my eyes aren’t bloodshot and puffy from crying my heart out, like he wasn’t about to just say he’s about to fuck another girl. His girl.

“I’m gonna go.” I wipe the nonexistent tears with the back of my hand and move to stand, finding it hard and disorienting for I stumble forward and almost fall into Grayson.

Ethan jumps after me, trying to stop me from leaving while Grayson reached out to grab me and... I don’t know what he wanted to do...steady me? Stop me and ask me not to tell his girlfriend he cheated on her? Whatever the reason may be, I slapped his hand immediately, on instinct. I couldn’t handle his hands on me right now. The thought of his touch made my physically ill.

“What the fuck is going on between you two?” Ethan whisper shouts, peering over Grayson’s shoulder to make sure we’re alone and he can speak freely.

I wrap my arms around me, avoiding their gaze at all costs as my attempt to bypass Grayson once more fails.

I push him back, growing aggravated with him and the pain I’ve held inside quickly turns into anger.

“Will you stop trying to leave and talk to us like a normal human being?!” Grayson shouts and I flinch, taking a step back in genuine fear. He never yells at me. Never. It’s the first time I haven’t felt safe nor happy around him. The first time I wanted to be as far away as possible. I can’t say I’m afraid he’ll hurt me, because there’s nothing more painful than what he already did, but I’m not good with angry outbursts directed toward me. I’ve never been able to handle people yelling at me and he knows this.

He tries to touch me again, but Ethan steps in this time around as I recoil from his brother like a wounded animal.

“What the fuck did you do, bro?” Even in my state, I could hear Ethan’s voice lower and his tone darken with a looming threat as if he’s speaking through his teeth.

“I - We made a mistake last night, okay?” Grayson whispers, making sure his girlfriend can’t hear as his eyes meet mine with the statement.

“Wow.” I scoff, shaking my head. Ethan turns back to look at me, his confused eyes flickering between us, awaiting an explanation.

“Nice to know that’s what you see me as.” I sneer, allowing the anger to fill me once more and the poison spread through my veins.

“I have a girlfriend.” Grayson insists, pressing his lips into a tight line and I nod to myself, pursing my lips.

“Didn’t seem like she crossed your mind while you were balls deep inside me.” I’m a lot of things, but crude has never been one of them. Until now. Even I’m surprised with the venomous words spilling from my mouth, noticing how Ethan’s jaw dropped to the floor with my statement.

“So why did you do it? Huh? To fuck with me and my feelings? Or is it to sabotage not only what you have with the clueless girl in your bedroom but also whatever the fuck connection we had?” I feel myself growing frustrated with him and the silence that hangs in the air as he looks anywhere but in my eyes. He never avoids eye contact, insisting it’s the proper way to talk to someone. I see his jaw clench and his face twist in an almost pained grimace and I know I struck a chord.

“What was last night to you? What am I to you?” I hit my palm against my chest in affect, not feeling but hearing the thud that comes with it.

“I’m not trying to hurt you Grayson, like you’ve done to me. This isn’t a quid pro quo thing. But after everything you’ve learned about me...after all this time, can you honestly tell me you didn’t do what you did because you actually live for the drama and pain in your life? Is this who you’ve become, because it feels like it is? Your life was doing so well that you felt the need to sabotage it so you can revel in the pain of losing not only me, but possibly the girl you came home with?” I know I’m right. It’s because he’s become who I used to be and who he just turned me into once more.

“Fuck you.” Grayson writhes, rage taking over him as well and I see his arm muscles contract under the pressure of his self-imposed control.

“I want her. I want HER.” He repeats, emphasizing and I chuckle dryly, putting my hands on my hips as the last shred of my heart shatters and I remember why I kept it hidden for so long.

“Ever heard of that saying...Don't leave a girl you need for a girl you want.” I remind him of the word he wrote himself, one that I hoped would be a powerful blow to his heart as it is to mine.

“You know...All my life, I’ve tried so hard. And I’m never the one. I’m always the second choice...third choice even! And you say fuck you....well, someday someone will. I can assure you it won’t be you. Ever again.” I run a hand through my hair, moving toward the door he’s no longer blocking and I find myself locking eyes with him for the first time since we started this talk.

“This...whatever it was..” I gesture vaguely between us.

“It’s over.” I swallow thickly, praying I keep it together for a moment longer.

“I’m so stupid for even allowing myself to think you might be different from all the other guys I had feelings for. I thought you’d realize that last night actually meant something to me. That you’re the only guy that’s ever made me fall in love and open my heart to someone again, but in the end it only made the heartbreak deeper and so much worse than anything I’ve ever felt.” I take a step into the hallway, feeling like my chest is about to cave in as the emptiness inside is now a hollow chasm where the bad outweighs the good and everything I wanted to believe in again is lost in the darkness once more.

“Wait.” Grayson grabs me by the arm, pulling me back and around to face him and I use both hands to stop myself from plummeting into him. Palms pressed against his chest, I push back, but his hold on me grows so much stronger that I’m sure I’ll have a bruise to join last night’s collection with a single, but major difference in its inception - last night was passion and this is desperation.

“You felt something for me?” The incredulous look in his eyes is enough for me to be sure he was blind to it all, like I’ve just opened his eyes to a whole new world of possibilities he could have never anticipated.

“Grayson?” A voice sweet as honey comes from across the hall and I can’t help but turn in its general direction. I follow the voice to a stunning girl whose curly locks fall across her almost bare chest, the rest of her body on display in the skimpy underwear she stripped down to.

I bite the inside of my lips, trying to hold myself together as I turn my head back to Grayson who didn’t move his eyes from me. He’s waiting for my answer, but I already gave him one. He chose the girl he wanted over the girl he needed...he can suffer the consequences for all I care.

Tapping his chest lightly with my right palm, I push away from him again and free myself of his relentless hold. His lips part and his eyes water as I take a couple steps back, my own vision turning blurry with the scene. In this moment, both our hearts broke, I could tell. But once I turned my back on him, there was no room for looking back. Not even when Ethan called after me, begging me to stay and talk through this. Not when I heard a thud as if Grayson’s legs gave out and he fell to the floor. Not when Tessa asked for an explanation, half screaming at Grayson.

I can remember being nothing but fearless and truly happy with him by my side, but we’ve become echoes and echoes, they wither, fade away and die.

Tags: @xalayx @fallinginlove-16 @accalialionheart @heyits-claire @daddygraysonsbitch

[forever-rogue]

Unintended Consequences - Part 9

Summary: Y/N and Ben had been best friends since the day six year old Y/N dropped her ice cream in front of Ben and he had offered her his. The rest is history. Until Ben went to Hollywood and disappeared for five years, before suddenly waltzing back into Y/N’s life with one simple request.

A/N: Hehehe, ya girl is back at it again. I love how passionate you guys get over this story! Please enjoy! Taglists are open! xx

PS - have fun kids!

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Word Count:  5k

Warnings: mentions of death;

MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

Y/N let out a small yawn as she stretched her arms over her head, enjoying the warm feeling running through her bones. The slight popping feeling in her joints was so pleasurable as she rolled over and felt the early morning sunlight that was streaming in through the curtains hit her face. It was a perfect, quiet morning in Los Angeles as the city bustled around them but their small space was peaceful and still. The only sign of life in the room were their warm, entwined bodies, limbs heavy with the remnants of sleep.

Joe was still fast asleep, the lightest of snores emanating from his mouth, a content expression on his face. She reached over and gently touched the light bit of stubble that covered his face, giggling at the light scratching sensation under her fingertips. She studied his features intently, letting a long breath. It almost wasn't fair how good he managed to look, even with his auburn locks all mussed up, mouth slightly agape in only an old shirt and boxers.

"Are you just going to keep staring at me, sugar?" his voice was still thick with sleep as he reached over and grabbed her hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing her palm gently. She hadn't realized he'd been awake and it caused an embarrassed chuckle to flow from her lips. He opened his eyes slowly, hazel orbs still bleary with sleep, "if you want to admire the art, it's going to cost you."

“Did you just go there?” she burst into a bit of laughter at his next level dad joke, as he just gloated, clearly very proud of himself. He really was the biggest dork sometimes. 

“It’s a good joke!” he insisted as she raised her eyebrows at him; they rose so high they almost disappeared into her hairline.

"I'm glad you think so highly of yourself," she let off a small laugh, bringing a smile to his face; it was already one of his favorite sounds in the world. She scooted closer to him, and he instinctively wrapped an arm around her waist, his fingers tracing over the little bits of exposed skin, "tell me, how much does the art cost?"

"A few kisses," he said matter of factly, and she dramatically rolled her eyes, "and a maybe a little more since we're going to be apart for so long."

She decided to oblige him, as if there was even the minute possibility that she wouldn’t, and kissed him slowly, moving in perfect rhythm with him. Even in the mornings he was always tasted a bit sweet, almost like he was constantly meant to be kissing her. After a few moments, she pulled back and stilled.

"I’ll miss you, you know," she admitted with a small sigh. She had tried to push that little fact to back of her mind, but as the day to leave grew closer and closer it had become inevitable. He cut her off with a few more lazy, soft kisses, leaving his lips near hers, "I'm going to miss you. Probably like crazy."

"It'll only be a few weeks till I'm there," he reminded her, but in reality it didn't help alleviate the situation. Joe was hanging back in LA for a bit longer, working on a project while she and Ben took off for New York, "besides, when you're there you can sleep in my bed. It'll be almost like I'm with you."

"I can't do that," she said meekly, sneaking in a few more soft kisses, "it'll be a little suspicious if we get to your house, and I just make myself at home and take over your bedroom, don't you think? Besides, Ben and I’ve reached a point to where we're not yelling at each other every day. I'll take that for now. Don’t need him to completely flip out about finding out about us.”

"To be fair - you barely talk at all..." he interrupted her, a mischievous smirk creeping onto his face. He wasn’t wrong; the two of them had remained cordial, but made it a strict, unspoken rule that no more words needed to be exchanged than necessary. It felt odd when Ben held her hand or kissed her, especially if she had recently been with Joe. Ben still didn’t know; at least she thought he didn’t as he had keep all but silent about what he had seen in the living room, “I want to tell him about us, Y/N....he’s going to find out eventually. I hate keeping secrets from him.”

“Joe-”

“Regardless of what’s happened, he’s still our friend,” he sighed lightly, “and he’s trying, I can see he is. I don’t want him to find out in another way besides us telling me. It might upset him now, but it’ll be better in the long run.”

“Joe,” she sighed and rubbed at her brow, not in the mood to discuss Ben any further. Where things were currently were more than fine with her. It wasn’t by any means the easiest relationship, but at least the lingering dirty looks and backhanded comments were gone. A little tension seemed like nothing compared to that, “soon, I promise. Right now, just tell me more about you, your room, everything. I want to know every little facet of who you are.”

"You know, if you're careful enough...you can always just sneak into my room when he's asleep," Joe suggested in a vain attempt to be helpful. If he was being honest, the thought of her alone in his bed gave him all sorts of wild thoughts, "think of it as a daring adventure."

"You're too much, you know that?" she laughed as she rested her head on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, feeling the vibrations in his chest as he chuckled, "I'll be able to finally snoop on you...see what secrets you're hiding from me."

"Unfortunately, you'll find I'm just as boring as I actually seem," he insisted with a small shrug. He always insisted that he wasn’t that excited and he didn’t see why anyone would spend the time on him, but Y/N always insisted just as fervently that he was incredible. He downplayed himself way too much; he had so much to offer but he seemed to refuse to see it for whatever reason, “no skeletons in the closet, no weird things hidden under the bed. Pretty much nothing odd at all. Unless you count the dinosaur figurines I have weird. But don’t worry, there’s only three of them.”

“Seriously?” she asked a smile spread across her face. He didn’t know if she was shocked in a positive or negative way, so he just chanced a soft nod, burrowing his face further into the soft, plush pillow. She threw back the covers and pulled him into her arms, smothering him in soft kisses as she laid on top of him.

“What?!” he asked in a surprised tone, holding her tightly against his own soft, warm body, “I didn’t realize a grown man with plastic figurines was such a turn on.”

“It’s you, you’re the turn on, you big dork,” she whispered as she rested her head on his chest, “you’re wonderful, Joe, I don’t know why you can’t see how lovely you are.”

“I’m just me-”

“Exactly,” she interrupted him, “that’s what makes you so special. God, I wish you were coming with us now.”

“Two weeks, sugar,” he said as he tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. She hummed softly, closing hers eyes and relishing in his soft touches, “we can make it that long.”

“I’ll try,” she promised, “can I ask you for a favor?“

“Anything.”

“Give me something to remember you by,” she teased quietly, kissing the bit of his exposed chest, letting her lips linger on his warm flesh, “I don’t want to forget a single thing about you.”

Ben made it a point to stare at his phone while the taxi driver loaded their bags into the car. It was the middle of the warm, breezy afternoon, and they were in the midst of getting ready to go to the airport to make their departure. Y/N had spent the morning lazing about in bed with Joe, who, luckily, had helped her with packing the night before. 

It was a harmless thing for friends to help one another with, so Ben hadn’t commented on anything. But he, naturally, overheard Joe’s teasing about all the pretty lace panties and bras Y/N had. Her face had been beet red as she snatched it out of his hands and packed it away quickly.

But that had been the day before and reality had come crashing down hard as she got up in the morning, reluctant to leave and coziness warmness of Joe’s bed. He had an arm slung around her, subconsciously holding onto her, which make things just that much harder. The apartment had been all but silent as the three of them moved about and prepared for their departure.

It had come so much sooner then she had expected, and part of her was ready to go, and part of her wanted to cling onto LA and everything California had to offer. But the chance to explore New York with Joe was also just as thrilling; she couldn’t wait to be by his side again and have him show her all of his haunts.

“All ready?” she asked Ben quietly, not wanting to interrupt him too much, or cause him to feel the need to start a row.

“Yes,” he responded and stuffed his phone into the back pocket of his jeans. He took the last bag from her hand, in a somewhat delicate fashion, almost as though he didn’t want to touch her skin, as if he was ice and she was fire and she would just melt him. She chanced a small smile at him, which for whatever reason, he returned, “well, I guess it’s time then.”

“Onto the next,” she agreed. Ben paused with his hand on the cab’s door, casting a glance at her as she lingered by the door of the lavish apartment building. His grip tightened as he realized what she was waiting for. Joe had made it a point not to come down and bade them farewell, in order to prevent any further awkward interaction. The relationship between the two men had been stunted, a sort of tense tango that suggested both of them knew about the other, but neither of them ever brought it up.

Joe hadn’t wanted to cause Ben any grief by flat out telling him that he and Y/N had start seeing each other, but he knew he should have. There was a little nagging feeling in his stomach that never seemed to go away, and only increased when Ben was around. Joe had a pretty good feeling that Ben knew, he wasn’t an idiot after all.

Ben had much more knowledge of their comings and goings than he let on. There had been several nights when he’d pass by either of their bedrooms and heard them speaking and giggling in hushed tones. But he suppressed his feelings; it was easier to try and ignore them, although they slowly ate away at him, rather than confront them. For now anyways - he had decided to let everything play out organically at the moment.

He wouldn’t intentionally do anything to create a distance between them, but if he got the chance to win her back over, well, he wouldn’t hesitate to do that either. He knew that deep down, but he was slowly trying to ignore it; he didn’t want to fight...just to be happy.

Joe stood inside the lobby of the building, watching the two of them intently. Y/N raised her hand and give him the slightest of waves, a sad little smile on her face. Two weeks she reminded herself two weeks.

Joe lifted his own hand and returned the gesture, only stopping when he saw the look Ben was giving him, somewhere between discontent and indifference. It was almost impossible to read.

“Come on, we’ve got to go, Y/N,” Ben said softly as he beckoned for her to get into the cab. Lowering her hand she gave Joe one last glance before getting into the seat, “alright then?”

“Just fine,” she replied as she chewed on her bottom lip. Ben made a small sound of acknowledgement before he got into the the other side. He focused his attention outside, watching the passing scenery pass by as they headed to LAX. Y/N pulled out her phone and focused her attention on scrolling through her Instagram timeline, not really focusing on thing or another.

As the cab started to drive away, a text popped up. She was glad she had remembered to silence her phone, but a grin appeared on her face as Joe’s name popped up.

Is it too soon to say I miss you already? Cause I miss you already.

Two weeks, she replied, don’t worry. I’ll be taking over your bed soon enough. And I’ll even take good care of your dinosaurs. Promise.

“What?” Ben asked with an amused smirk as he watched Y/N thoughtfully chew her pizza. She had made a big deal of carefully inspecting all the toppings and picking a piece apart before finally eating it. Ben had been to the small pizzeria several times, with both Joe and Gwil, and had just ordered his usual for the two of them, figuring she would like it as well. She shook her head as she continued to chew,  “you don’t like it?”

“I do,” she proclaimed as she swallowed the large piece she had had in her mouth, “it’s delicious. It might even be better than the stuff in LA. It’s just so different. Americans are a bit odd, don’t you think? So many types of pizza, it’s almost excessive!”

“But almost all of it is delicious,” he countered, taking a large bite of his own slice. His heart ached a little bit at the familiarity of the situation; they had been in almost this exact position so many times in the past. He used to adore how Y/N went off on random tangents, how passionate she got over almost everything in her life. She never did things half-hearted that was for sure, “even you have to admit that.”

“Fair enough,” she grinned as she finished the last bite, scooping the little bits that had fallen onto her plate up, “I might like New York a little better so far. LA was great, but everything was too healthy. Have they even heard of sugar over there?”

Ben snorted into his glass, trying his best not to choke on the soda, as he howled with laughter. It was moments like this that warmed his heart, moments were it didn’t matter that who he was, or who she was. Simple times were things were effortless and tender. He had missed them so much more than he had ever wanted to admit; no one had come close to making him feel like she had while during their years apart. It hadn’t been really been until he had met Joe, Gwil, and Rami that he started to feel like himself again.

“Jesus, Ben, calm down over there,” she joked as she passed him a napkin. He gratefully took it from her, his fingers gently grazing over hers, causing a spark to jolt his bones as he quickly pulled back from. Nope he told himself, this is what I’m trying to avoid. Y/N noticed it too, making it a point to stare anywhere but at his face, knowing she’d be done for otherwise. Her heart was thumping erratically as she willed herself to calm down, reminding herself that she didn’t want him. She was just barely friends with him...was the lie she repeated to herself.

“Sorry,” he said, a general statement, not really sure what he was sorry for, but they both kind of knew. She just shook her head at him, an apologetic look on her features. Physical contact with him was something she had been trying to avoid; no matter how much she tried to deny it, the lingering little feeling still sat within her. When the contact was out in public and forced it wasn’t the same, that was all acting, purely for show. This was much more intimate and personal, “can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” she answered almost automatically, wondering what on earth he could be referring to. These types of questions made her more nervous than anything else.

“Are you happy?” the question caught her out of the blue and she inhaled sharply as she turned her eyes to look at his own. They were so bright and clear, almost revealing all of his secrets to her.

“Here? In New York?” she responded lamely, knowing full well that wasn’t what he was referring to. They had been there by themselves for the past week, exploring the city and going to all sorts of events. Joe’s place had been like a home away from home, so calm and tranquil, every aspect of it reminding her of him in some way.

Especially his bed; it was large and soft, and despite the recently washed sheets, his scent lingered all over them. Once she had made Ben had been asleep, she had taking to stealing away and sleeping in his bed by herself. Some nights, she’d hold one of the pillows to her chest, clutching it tightly and wishing it was him. It wasn’t him though and she was still more than ready to see him again.

“No,” he interrupted her train of thought, pulling her back into reality, “I mean in general. Are you happy here and now?”

It took her a moment to think of how to phrase it, but she knew she was. Things had been happening so unlike she had ever imagined, but it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, right now things were okay, very okay, “I’m happy, Benny. I’m very happy right now.”

“Good,” he answered, the fact that she had called him Benny was not lost on him. She didn’t seemed to have noticed her slip up before focusing on grabbing another slice of the pizza. He was about to open his mouth to say something else, but decided against it, instead opting to gaze out the window at the brightly lit evening, where rain was drizzling ever so lightly.

Y/N clutched the steaming mug of hot chocolate tightly between her hands as she sat in the small backyard of Joe’s house. She had thought about lighting the small fire pit, but had determined that there was just too much of a drizzle to bother. Instead she sat under the large outdoor umbrella, wearing one of Joe’s sweaters as she watched the glittering nighttime sky. She had been lost deep in her own thoughts since earlier that evening when Ben had asked her if she was happy.

“Mind if I join you?” Ben asked in a tender tone as he stepped into the backyard, quietly sliding the door shut. She turned to him and shook her head, pointing at the chair next to her. He had a blanket around his shoulders and plopped down next to her, rubbing his tired eyes, “what are you doing out here? It’s after midnight.”

“Couldn’t sleep. Insomnia strikes again,” she admitted as she offered him the mug. He politely declined and followed her eye line, trying to figure out what exactly she was staring at, seeing if there were any identifiable constellations, “besides, it’s a beautiful evening, and I’ve had a lot on my mind today. I feel like there’s always a lot on my mind these days.”

“And it’s your favorite weather too,” he stated matter of factly, remembering all the nights they had snuck out and climbed to the roof of their houses to go and watch the night sky, often not caring if they were getting soaking wet from the English rains, “I remember.”

“Always has been and always will be,” she agreed, pulling her knees up to her chest, and resting her chin on top of them.

“What’s on your mind?” he asked after a few quiet moments. For once the silence that flowed forth between the two of them wasn’t tense or awkward. It was comfortable much as it always should have been, “if you don’t mind my asking...”

“I don’t mind,” she reassured him, glancing at him for just a moment, “my mum’s been on my mind lately. It’s been almost three years since she’s been gone. Next week will make it three.“

“Oh,” it was a soft sound that escaped his lips, “I-I didn’t know.”

“How could you have?” she shrugged lightly, no venom or ill will behind her words, “it’s okay. I’ve leaned to let it go. It still sucks sometimes, you know? There are times I forget and I really want to tell her something, and I’ll get halfway through the process of calling when I realize. I don’t know if that’ll ever change, but it does get easier over time. I know it sounds silly, and you must think I’m a complete loon, but sometimes I go and visit her just to talk. I’m always met with silence, obviously, but it feels like she’s there sometimes, and it’s a way to get things off my chest.”

“I don’t think that’s silly at all,” he reassured her. It pained him a little bit to think about how hard this must have been for her. Her mother had been like a second mother to him when they were growing up and he hadn’t even gotten to say goodbye. He should have...could have, if he hadn’t all but excommunicated them from his life, “I like to think that the people we love the most ever truly leave us. Sounds like a bit of an ironic statement coming from me, doesn’t it? Not sure I have much room to talk..”

“You said it, not me,” she held up her hands in defense, but they shared a small laugh. It was nice to experience this instead of just screaming at each other, “I’m not going to hold it over you anymore, Ben. It won’t change what happened. I wish you had been there, but you weren’t and that’s that. It’s done. Us fighting over it is never going to get anything accomplished, and frankly I don’t have the strength or energy for it anymore. Being petty isn’t in my nature these days, I’m afraid.”

“R-really?” he asked timidly.

“Really,” she promised as she closed her eyes, realizing they were slowly taking a step in the right direction. The part of her that had held onto the anger was slowly dissipating, and realized it wasn’t healthy for her to harbor those feelings forever.

“Can I ask...w-what exactly...happened? To your mum?” her words had sent a sort of relief rushing through his bones. This was the only thing he had wanted all along, “she was so good to me...I wish I could have said goodbye.”

“Hey, let’s not beat ourselves up about anything anymore. It was cancer though,” she answered, “very swift moving lung cancer that spread throughout her body before they even had a chance to do anything. That woman didn’t smoke a day in her life, and that was her downfall. It’s almost cruel, you know? But she didn’t suffer long. It was a quick demise, if that makes it any better. You know...there were days I wished it were me. How unfair that such a kind woman be taken from the world, and a mess like myself left behind.”

“You’re not a mess, Y/N. You deserve to be here, you have a reason for being here,” he insisted, a pang in his chest at the idea that she had ever felt like this, “you are an amazing person and have so much to offer, even if you don’t think so. Your mum would never want you to think like that.”

“I know, I know,” she gave in with small smile, “but I was in a very dark place, and it was hard to get out of it. It felt like I was clawing my way out of hell half the time. But I did, and I’m still here, living and breathing despite all of it.”

“I should have been there-”

“You wouldn’t have been able to do anything,” she said after a few quiet moments, feeling like a small weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. She could sense that this was a sense in the right direction. Even if she was still mad or annoyed, a sense of forgiveness was worth so much more, “no amount of money or anything in the world would have saved her.”

“But I could have…something,” he insisted, suddenly finding the fraying edge of the blanket suddenly extremely interesting.

“Ben,” she pressed up against him lightly, “stop. It’s alright. Honestly, I want to be annoyed or even mad, but why? It’s not going to make anything better or different. I know if you knew…”

“I would have been there in a heartbeat,” he finished for her.

“I know...so don’t stress, Ben,” she reached over and put her hand on his arm, giving it a gentle squeeze. His heart almost stopped at the touch, and it took everything within him to keep from making a soft, small, whimpering sound, “promise me we’ll both let it go?”

“Pinky,” he promised her, sticking out his finger and waiting with bated breath to see if she would take it. She almost laughed at the gesture, something so ingrained in from their childhood -  the familiarity of it almost choked her up. She bit the inside of her cheek for a moment before pulling her sleeve back and hooking her finger around his.

“Pinky,” she said quietly, reluctantly letting go after a few moments. A quiet string of unspoken words hung in the air as she studied him for a few moments. His golden locks glinted in the pale moonlight, his eyes soft as could be, soft skin pale. She wasn’t supposed to be having feelings for him like this anymore. He wasn’t supposed to make her heart race and cause her to feel warm tingles all over. It wasn’t supposed to him anymore.

“Y/N,” he said quietly, that old tone had reserved specifically for her coming through. He somehow had the ability make his low, soft voice very sweet ad gentle. She only ever heard it when he spoke to her. No one else, not even the other girls he had dated in the past ever got to hear this voice. She wished he hadn’t used it; it was her weakness, her downfall every time, even if he had zero clue.

She angled her body so she was facing him, setting the half empty mug onto the table. Her breath was coming out in rapid spurts as they looked at each other silently. Every fiber of her being that had any sense left told her to turn away and head into the house. They could feel what was coming; it was like the universe had set a plan in motion and it was all slowly playing out. It set a buzzing in their bones, that almost drew them together like an unspoken force.

But she wasn’t ready to listen to that little bit of sense that was left in her. No, this was a matter of the heart, not the brain. Suppressing the feelings she still felt lying dormant within her only worked for so long, and so well. She had to know, she had to know if that magic feeling was there. She just had to know.

Ben tentatively reached over and touched her face, running his fingertips against her cheek, before stopping at her jaw. She closed her eyes and leaned in a closer to where she could feel his breath fanning across her face.

Pull back, pull back her mind screamed at her, don’t do this, you’ll regret it.

But she didn’t. She let Ben pull her into his lap, covering her with the big, soft blanket, as his lips met hers. They were still soft, so soft, and felt perfect against hers. They felt like they were meant to be together forever.

A small whimper escaped her lips when they broke apart after what seemed like an eternity. He put his hands on either side of her face and pressed a few more soft kisses to her lips and cheeks, before stopping and resting his forehead against hers.

“Ben,” her voice was barely audible as she rested her forehead against his, hands still resting on his shoulders.

“I’m sorry,” he responded, letting out a shaky breath, “for everything.”

“What?!”

“I’m sorry,” he repeated and this time she knew he was being honest, “I’m sorry for leaving you and forcing you to go through everything on your own. It was meant to be us together, just like I always promised you.”

“I’m so sorry for everything.“

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[cathrynhanel]

WRITEBLR intro

CATHRYNHANEL WRITEBLR INTRO

Hi ! my name is Cathryn, she/her, and I’ve been scouring writeblr for months now. I’m working on my debut novel (the beginning of a trilogy, if I do well). As I’m in the last stages of developmental editing, I thought about finally make an intro to my WIP :) I would, however, like to note that I’m part dyslexic, so apologies for any errors.

WIP INTRO !!!!

xoraa → environmentally eerie, psychological, adventurous.

narration → third person, present tense, multiple points of view (mostly just the protagonist). 

blurb → What lengths will you go to find an answer?

Xoraa was built to cut the last of civilization off from the rest of the world. After centuries of living in an isolated paradise, the only human engagement with the Outside — a seemingly malignant environment surrounding them, where extreme heat has scorched the earth and mysteriously wiped it clean of all signs of past civilization — has been Seekers; people who, despite warnings of what lies out there, have crossed the border and escaped.

In Xoraa, we join the latest assembly of Seekers. The group is made up of seven men and women, also known as P3-61. Sorsha Danno is the groups newly appointed member. As she escapes through malevolent landscapes with distrustful but desperate Seekers, days stretching into weeks, haunted by guilt and hunted by Xoraa's Elite Forces, Sorsha begins to penetrate the secrets of the Outside.

But with each discovery, she must confront disturbing truths about herself and the cruelty of the earth they live on. They head out expecting the unexpected, and the Outside delivers — but it's the past that follows with her across the border and the secrets the Seekers are keeping from one another that change everything.

NOW FOR SOME KEY CHARACTERS.

sorshadanno → 24 (bi), chocolate hair and eyes, a scar from her temple through her brow. 

Sorsha has lived with her grandmother for as long as she can remember, knowing little to nothing about her parents.

Generally, she is the type of person who is rational and consistent in her conclusions, often bottling her thoughts up. Her methods can sometimes be brutal and irrational. But as Niko often points out, she’s not focusing on the whole picture. 

Sorsha has very little patience for the Seeker’s feelings when it comes to whining about how tired they are; as she tells it, she’s teaching them how to fight for their lives, not for fun. But she does feel a low key desire to take care of them.

“Good is a point of view.”

jinx wilde → 33 (pan), tall, bleached coils cut close to her scalp, unblemished dark skin.

Jinx is the leader of the group. She is a closed person. Therefore, none of the Seekers knows anything about her past, other than her late daughter.

Usually, she is calm and composed. She stances tall, elegant, with the posture of an army general. Her movements are always careful and thought-out, not a thing out of place, much like her way of speech: speaking each word clearly. Because of all this, the Seekers look up to her and stand by her side with almost every request.

“One wears a mask for so long, they forget who they were beneath it.”

tychofadely → 26 (het), blond with crooked dimples and silver eyes.

Tycho is sarcastic and quick-witted, but also observant and analytical. He is all about connecting dots, theorising and identifying possibilities. He frequently thinks out loud, energetically or exasperatedly spewing ideas, often with references to pop culture.

He loves to express his feelings to his friends and is usually unnerved if they don’t reciprocate. He might even unintentionally put his feelings out there before he considers or becomes receptive to the feelings of those around him. Still, he cares about his friends and intends to do whatever he can to save them.

“Alright, it’s causing me severe mental anguish to say this, but he’s right.”

nikohorne → 26 (het), muscular hispanic, tall and broad with a haunting gaze.

Niko is restless. He’s always working on something privately, albeit subtly, from behind the scenes. He is aware of the whole of his environment and uses its details to improvise. He obviously enjoys fights and takes joy in wild physical stimuli.

He doesn’t have a well-developed feeling function. It is only shown as something that helps him determine whether it was righteous to go and take revenge on those who were participants in events he dislikes. And he doesn’t care what others think.

“I’ve got to say, I continue to be impressed with your ingenuity. But I think I’m just beginning to understand what kind of person you are.”

mara mccall → 20 (pan), light brown hair and moss eyes, plump pink lips and natural curves.

At first, Mara seems like the typical spoiled girl who knows nothing about the real world. In reality, she is a planner, but also impulsive in desiring immediate action. She can store enormous amounts of information in her mind and recalls facts with total clarity. 

Mara is super organised and efficient, but also very logical. The Seekers credit her with being a "genius". She has a natural instinct to learn anything she puts her mind to, feels a strong drive toward success and pursues the things she cares about most, staying very loyal to her friends.

“Sweetheart, we’ve got about half Xoraa’s Elites on our asses, I think we can handle a sewer.”

jagolekar → 37 (ace), dark-skinned medic, bald with a goatee, only has one eye.

Jago's personality can best be described as kindhearted, but also mysterious, likely due to his past that few of the Seekers know about. He does his best to keep his cards close to the vest, and he never reveals more information than is absolutely necessary. 

Despite his desire to maintain an air of secrecy, he has developed a very close bond with the Seekers. As a result, he does his best to help them as much as he can, while trying his best to come off assimply a surgeon. However, when danger strikes, he proves to be more than capable of protecting himself.

“A short-term solution to a long-term problem. You better make it work.”

terrencebalker → 38 (het), slender ginger who is pale and kind of pasty, wears turtlenecks.

Terrence is the main antagonist and works for Xoraa. A young, ruthless man who has complete confidence in the government's way of ruling, the Elite Force’s training methods and their weapons. His job mainly consists of handling the nation’s Seeker problems.

Most of the time, he has a laid-back demeanour. But he can become violent when others try to test his patience and intensely sadistic. He is on the verge of being a fanatic, but often justifies himself by telling others he does it for Xoraa. 

“Send a pair of scouting parties. Two caravans only. Tell them not to come back until they’re found!”

Thank you for reading :) I’m looking forward to becoming more active on this platform in 2020. The photo is not mine, found on Pinterest; credit to the original photographer.

[pixxyofice]

you know, I should just... write down my thoughts about the timeline of events for the "akira is from inaba" hc/au. Why not? It could help me write it!

.... Warning for long post. I am on Mobile. My thoughts tend to draw on. Apologies!

4-5 years of knowing a group of people is definitely enough to have them considered close friends! So if Akira met one of the Investigation Team, and then was suddenly pulled into their little group (+Nanako), becoming a part of it for 4-5 years? Yeah, Akira would be close to them.

Akira was, at first, a little bit starstruck by Risette and the First Detective Prince being his friends... and then the 4-5 years went by and now its like a side note. "Oh yeah, Rise's Risette. Forgot that through her spicy-ass meals and doting tendencies." "Oh yeah, Naoto's basically like my strict parents who bends the rules sometimes. Forget they're the first Detective Prince."

Nanako is like the little sister Akira never had. So, naturally, Akira is now Souji's little brother in the friend group.

When Akira is put in Tokyo for probation, Akira is supposed to not interact with anyone from his hometown, because they might've been bad influences... but! Souji isn't from Inaba, is he? Hmmm? (Naoto scolds Akira for this... but doesn't tell him to stop contacting them, because everyone knows the trial against Akira was Bogus)

Akira will share cat pictures of Morgana. Souji saves them. "Cat people," sighs the persona groups

"Haha where's the Junes Mascot" "Junes doesn't have a mascot???" "????? what"

When Ann finds out he knows Rise (via him texting her one day about fashion and her looking over his shoulder and seeing a selfie of Rise Herself in some casual gear), she freaks out a bit and also freaks out Ryuji by proxy. Akira has to think for a few moments before going "oh... riiight, duh, friend is also an idol."

Akira, interacting with Akechi: i think the OG Detective Prince not only is smarter, but also cooler in general and is a great friend

Akira, in an act of wanting to share what he does to the people he trusts most and fueled by being Tired As Fuck, asks if anybody knows about Persona. Instead of the reactions he expected ("is that a game?" "Like the psychology theory?" "huh?"), he gets very, very worried messages sent his way and his older friends correctly guessing that he is a phantom thief and their methods are Persona Related. And gets confused by references of TVs from some of them.

Yep, his older friends are Persona users. Explains a lot, he thinks, as he brings up incidents in his head of burning himself on Yukiko's skin (like he has Ann's), of hanging around Chie and Yosuke to cool down (like he has seen Futaba do with Yusuke), and just goes "oh how did i not connect those dots sooner"

He keeps it a secret from his team because they don't need to know there are more persona users other than them (and Akechi).

Naoto does offer to have Rise, Souji, and themself to help out, but Akira insists on doing this journey alone. Souji agrees tentatively, but says "hey, Akira, if you ever feel like you're in over your head, tell us, we can help"

(Akira doesn't take him up on the offer.)

As Futaba joins the team, he recognizes the method in which she got her Persona was actually similar to how his older friends described how they got their Personas. So he guesses that the palace treasure was her shadow right away when the tomb is empty, and bolts as soon as they discover this fact.

Akira now has two younger sisters: Nanako and Futaba. He wants to introduce them when everything is over, they'd get along over Feathermen and other shows of that nature.

"How the hell do you have a signed copy of a pink argus poster?? Most of the signed copies are cities away from here!" "... y'know, good question. I got it from my older... friends... okay gimme a sec I suddenly have to ask them something" And thus Akira found out his older Persona friends were friends with Yukari Takeba personally.

"How... Is it related to Persona stuff?" "yes." "what the fuck?"

Akira doesn't tell them about the velvet room, because surely they havent experienced that. He is wrong, but he's thinking in terms of how he's interacting with it, not in terms of wild card shit doing with the velvet room.

Things go on pretty much normally, except Akira is contacting his older friends every now and then and getting Persona Advice and telling them about how his Persona Adventures are going.

He doesn't tell them about Akechi. That's a Thief Thing, and he doesn't want Akechi to catch onto those other persona users he's interacting with... Just only that they're his friends. (Like with Hifumi and other confidants.)

Persona Q2 is when Akira's knowledge of the other groups of Persona Users gets forced to the front. Luckily, nobody remembers PQ2. Yay!

When Akira hears the name of the second movie, he's like "wait". And then he puts his fake gun to Souji's sword, recognizes Souji, and goes "HEY WAIT" and the phantom thieves are confused as Akira leaps into explaining stuff to his older friends' younger self and also goes "oh yeah we are definitely time traveling in some form"

Shame nobody remembers, Akira and Souji would laugh about wielding a gun as a sword.

After PQ2, Worrying Plan Time. When news gets out that the PThieves leader died, the IT have to actively restrain themselves from going to Tokyo and finding the person who killed him. In the end, Kanji is very close to just deciding "to hell with it, imma run to tokyo," when the group chat pings and it's Akira, saying he's fine but also laying low because his plan worked. Cue 8 worried persona users asking why he didn't ask for their help. Oops.

"Igor doesn't have a deep voice??" "... I should've guessed you were the wild card. Wait. Of course Igor doesn't- what happened to Igor??"

the IT, looking at the sky one xmas eve: hey what the fuck?

After That...

"did you fight a god" "How the hell did you know?" "persona user journey tradition we guess??"

Blah blah getting Akira out of juvie blah blah Akira's back in Inaba now

When the IT are told that, yeah, the cat was a Persona User, they just sigh and go "figures." They then tell him about a dog Persona User, which... Yeah, makes Akira question how that happened. They say they'll explain it later. "When is later?" "When our Persona Friends visit" "h...huh?" "We'll bring you, and if your friends are okay with it, we'll bring them. We're secretive about our meetings."

His friends come over to Inaba to see him, and they get roped into being introduced to Akira's older friends- and, yes, told about them being Persona Users. Chaos and questions ensue.

When someone (probably Rise or Yosuke) mention Mitsuru Kirijo as a really notable (and scary) persona user, things get more crazy. The IT promises to bring the PT to the meeting.

... That's it, I would think!

[a-master-procrastinator]

Too Much Info: Character Interview

Tagged by... no one? Technically, yes, but @vespertine-legacy​ said that i can consider myself tagged, so thanks!

I’m going with Raen (smuggler), maybe we’ll have some laughs.

► Name ➔ “Raen Lette. Ha! Believed my name is really Raen? It’s Raenelit. Now it sounds more stupid”.

► Are you single ➔ “I won’t be if you come to this nice cantina at the Carrick station tonight”. *winks*

► Are you happy ➔ “Well, I have a ship, a crew, a nice outfit, I can do some dumb stuff and get paid for this! What’s not to be happy about?”

► Are you angry ➔ “Mostly no. Of course, there are some ways to make me angry: steal my ship, don’t pay me when it’s time, lecture me about following rules (well, it’s rather making me bored). You know, the usual”.

► Are your parents still married ➔ “Yes”.

NINE FACTS

► Birth Place ➔ “Corellia, the strongest drinks, the most handsome pilots and the fastest ships in the galaxy”.

► Hair Color ➔ She examines her black hair, shrugging: “I think it’s white?”

► Eye Color ➔  “Cold as ice on Hoth. Or as ice on Ilum. What do you think?”

► Birthday ➔ “Nelona 16″. (not sure how to use galactic calendar)

► Mood ➔ “Cheery”.

► Gender ➔ A moment of silence. “Smuggler”. *finger guns*

► Summer or winter ➔ “Summer. Winter is too cold. And boring”.

► Morning or afternoon ➔ “Who in the galaxy picks morning?”. Remembers Shailla(jc). “Well, maybe some nerds like my sis”.

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

► Are you in love ➔ “I ship myself with pizza and mint, does this count?”

► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ “Yes”.

► Who ended your last relationship ➔ “A blaster bolt in his head. Yes, blaster bolt was mine”.

► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ “I dunno. Maybe I have”.

► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ “Think not”.

► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ “I hug my pals every day. Bowdar pretends that he doesn’t like it, but I know he does”.

► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ “I like to think that I just don’t know about them”.

► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ “Nope. Why would I?”

SIX CHOICES

► Love or lust ➔ “Love. Shocking, I know”.

► Lemonade or iced tea ➔ “Lemonade with mint leaf pair”.

► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ “Both. My crew is my besties, but I also have a lot of regular friends. People just can’t resit my charm”.

► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ “In, out, it doesn’t matter. It must be wild night”.

► Day or night ➔ “Night”.

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

► Been caught sneaking out ➔ “Yes, and I’m proud of this”.

► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ “Yes, and I’m not proud of this”.

► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ "Nah. I either get what I want or try to forget about it. Why to hurt yourself?"

► Wanted to disappear ➔ "Nope. Even in the most embarrassing situations. At least I would try to turn them into something laughable".

FOUR PREFERENCES

► Smile or eyes ➔ “Smile”.

► Shorter or Taller ➔ “Taller”.

► Intelligence or Attraction ➔ “Attraction. Intelligence is important, but c’mon, how many people would date someone ugly?”

► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ “Got me there. I kinda prefer both”.

FAMILY

► Do you and your family get along ➔ “Well, we don't live together, but I can't say my relationship with family is bad. Quite opposite. Even with my too good and boring sister".

► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ "No. Remember what I said about being happy?"

► Have you ever ran away from home ➔ "Sometimes. Don’t worry, it wasn't as dramatic as you might imagine. I stole my parents' ship and got into a little adventure. They were impressed. Now this is my ship".

► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ “I’ve been kicked out of cantina once. Well, maybe not once. The owner said that’s because I was buying too many drinks, but I say it’s because the place couldn’t stand my brilliance”.

FRIENDS

► Do you secretly hate one of your friends ➔ “Why be friends with someone you hate?”

► Do you consider all of your friends good friends ➔ “Yep. They all are my besties”.

► Who is your best friend ➔ “I just said all of them are my besties”.

► Who knows everything about you ➔ “I don’t think you can know everything about someone. Though my parents and sister know almost everything about me. Even some things I’d like them to forget”.

I have no idea who to tag. If someone hasn’t done this yet but wants to, consider yourself tagged.

[miguel-manbemel]

Aspects & Fanfics Ep. 24: Bold Bonding Between Brothers

New entry of the “Aspects & Fanfics”, the first one of the year 2020. I hope you enjoy it, and also the new ship that is gonna be featured from now one, starting from the end card in this episode. New year, new ship. I’m not going to say much more and leave you with the story, which as the title suggests will be focused in the relationship between Roman and Remus. I don’t think there’s any need for any kind of label. It’s the normal relation between two brothers that sometimes they love each other and sometimes they hate each other, sometimes both at the same time. The normal siblings relationship, that is.

As usual, if you want to read previous entries of the story, as well as seeing past posts from this vlog, you can find them right here. And I hope you enjoy it. Until next time.

SYNOPSIS: Thomas is entering a literary contest where they ask for scripts for a feature film. The winner will get his script made by a legendary director. The problem is that the asked genre is horror, and Roman is not an expert on the matter, which will make him call Remus for help. But will they be able to work together or will the differences and Remus’ fear make it all blow away?

WARNINGS: Horror is mentioned throughout the story, including some disturbing scenes mentioned by Remus. Romantic Prinxiety is featured as usual but (spoilers) also romantic Logicality will make an entrance in the end card.

EPISODE INDEX

[Thomas is in front of the camera with his New Year hat on and a cup of champagne on his hand]

THOMAS: [singing to the tune of “Auld Lang Syne”]

Should old acquaintance be forgot,

and never brought to mind?

Should old acquaintance be forgot,

and old lang syne?

For auld lang syne, my dear,

for auld lang syne,

we'll take a cup of kindness yet,

for auld lang syne…

[yelling with a wide smile, rising his cup] Happy new year! [he suddenly goes serious as if he was listening to someone] Wait, what do you mean we’re already way into the New Year? [smiling bashfully] Wow… Some parties really go wild, don’t they? [a little concerned] But it’s still 2020, right…? And what are you still doing in my house? The party’s over now! Get out! Shoo, shoo!

[intro sequence]

THOMAS: What is up, everybody!? You see, this morning a friend of mine told me about something that could be fun. It is a contest, a script-writing contest. The winner gets to have his script filmed by prestigious director Steven Spielstokes, director of “Indiana Picani and the Last Cartoon Therapy”! It is a unique opportunity!

ROMAN: [rising up, excited] It is, Thomas! I can’t wait to start on this project!

THOMAS: Right!? I’m pumped up!

ROMAN: Me too! This is the chance you’ve been waiting for! You’ll be able to join the elite of so many prestigious scriptwriters that preceded you. And the Oscar awaits you, Thomas, all shiny and golden and…

LOGAN: [rising up] We get it, Roman. There’s no need to exaggerate. Besides, don’t put your hopes too high before time is due. There will surely be thousands of contestants trying their luck and many of them will be as talented as Thomas or more. We can be the winners, but we must be ready to accept defeat if it comes.

ROMAN: Ugh… here comes professor Wet Necktie, always spoiling the fun…

THOMAS: Roman, nicknames…

ROMAN: Sorry, Logan. And getting back into the stuff that really matters in this conversation, what are the rules? I need to know the limitations I shall have to place into my work, to start planning and all that stuff…

THOMAS: Um, yes… I read them just a couple of minutes ago. It has to be a script of a feature length, between 60 and 80 minutes, written in standard script format, and the topic is…

ROMAN: Romance? Fantasy? Musical? Adventures?

THOMAS: …horror.

ROMAN: [suddenly serious] What? Horror!? [looking at Logan] Well, I hope you’re proud of yourself, Logan. You jinxed it all with your talking about accepting defeat. I know nothing about the horror genre! That’s not my department!

THOMAS: I was afraid of that, never better said. I never made any true horror story, so I didn’t know how well you could perform in this genre. So, I let the contest slide, right?

ROMAN: No, no yet, Thomas. There’s always a first time for everything. If I have to write… [face of disgust] horror, then horror it will be. [smirks] Besides, I’ve got an ace under my sleeve, the best consultant I could ever ask for: my husband.

LOGAN: That’s absurd, Roman, Virgil doesn’t fit into your sleeve.

ROMAN: [singsongy voice] Virg-i-i-i-l!

VIRGIL: [rises up] Please, would you mind not calling me like that again? It makes me feel like a dog called by his owner.

ROMAN: That’s why I call you like that, my cute little puppy!

VIRGIL: And don’t call me like that, please… not in front of the others, at least.

THOMAS: I’ll pretend that I didn’t hear that.

LOGAN: Agreed…

VIRGIL: So what do you want, Roman?

ROMAN: I’m glad that you ask, Virge. I need your help. I have to write a horror story and…

VIRGIL: You do understand that, even if I look like a creepy dark emo, creativity, creepy or otherwise, is not my department, right Ro?

THOMAS: [low voice] …Ro?

VIRGIL: I’d love to be able to help you, but other than with brief inspirations based on Thomas’ real anxious experiences, there’s not much I can do for you. And you don’t want me to make Thomas go through a hell of anxiety to give you story ideas, right?

ROMAN: Well…

THOMAS: [firm voice] No, Roman, you don’t!

ROMAN: [sighs] Fine… Then I don’t know what to do.

VIRGIL: Well, you could ask another Side for help. Another Side that could be really well versed on the matter.

[as he names each one of them, the Sides rise up one by one, not knowing how they got there as if summoned against their will]

ROMAN: Well, Patton wouldn’t be of help. Last time I read him Little Red Riding Hood he got so scared he slept for two weeks with a bottle of purgative in his pajama pocket to use it if some Big Bad Wolf swallowed him while he slumbered, to make him throw up. Deceit… I don’t know. He has trouble remembering lines. He’d forget everything he’s given me and it would be a really incoherent story. Honesty… he is out of the question. He’s too attached to reality to create a work of fiction. He couldn’t even make a single change to his room from the real living room. How could he create a simple story? Logan… he would be great for a horror poem, but people don’t speak in verses unless it is a period stage show. This is a script where characters are not supposed to speak in rhymes, I don’t think he could be good on that either.

LOGAN: I’m here, listening to you belittling me, in case you didn’t notice.

PATTON: What is going on here, kiddos?

LOGAN: Thomas has to write a horror story and Roman’s considering his options for assistance.

PATTON: [unsettled] Ho… horror? What am I doing here, then? I don’t like horror stories.

ROMAN: [to Virgil] See?

HONESTY: It’s okay, Patton, it’s fiction. It’s not real and it can’t hurt you.

DECEIT: [creepy voice] Unless…

[Patton gets scared and Honesty goes to comfort him]

HONESTY: Dee, stop pestering the child!

DECEIT: Sorry, Patton, I was kidding… unless…

[Honesty looks at Deceit with a murderous glance as Patton whines on Honesty’s shoulder and grabs him, terribly scared]

ROMAN: You see how my judgments on each Side were on point? So, as I was saying, I don’t know what Side you really mean, Virgil.

VIRGIL: [beat] You’ve left out the Side I really meant on purpose, right?

ROMAN: [sighs] Yes.

DECEIT: But why? He’s your brother, Roman. They say that the best working relationships, especially in creative works, are the ones composed of siblings. Why not giving him a chance?

ROMAN: For ordinary siblings, maybe, but we’re not ordinary siblings, Dee. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean I don’t want to work with him. I’d love for us to be able to create something together. It’s just I don’t know how I could work with Remus. We’re so different in terms of creativity. I don’t like anything he comes up with and he doesn’t like anything I come up with. And also, I may be a little extra…

LOGAN: A little?

ROMAN: [frowning at Logan] …but in spite of that, I create my works methodically and seriously. And Remus seems to be so chaotic in everything he does. It would be a hell of a working environment.

VIRGIL: And yet, him being the part that takes care of Thomas’ dark creativity, he’s the best Side for the job. You know it, Roman. You need to call him.

ROMAN: Maybe he doesn’t want to work on this.

VIRGIL: You won’t know if you don’t ask him. Call him.

ROMAN: [sighs] Okay… I hope I don’t regret this… Remus! If you hear me, come quick! I need you here!

REMUS: [suddenly appearing with his usual grin, next to Roman, who flinches at his sudden appearance] Wow, Roman, this is new! You are summoning me? You really must be desperate for something, am I right?

ROMAN: Well, I really am, to be honest.

REMUS: Well, what is it? How can this crazy little brother help his fluffy big brother?

ROMAN: I’m not fluffy!

REMUS: Yes, you are. You’ve gained a little weight on your buttocks since the last time we met, bro.

ROMAN: [briefly scared, trying to look at his own buttocks] What!? Really!? [suddenly returning to his previous attitude] Whatever, that doesn’t matter right now. What do you know about horror?

REMUS: [pumped up] Horror? I love horror stories! There are so many ideas I have written in the last few years! Why do you ask?

ROMAN: Well, Thomas needs to write a horror story and…

REMUS: And you have no idea where to start, right? Of course you don’t, all the horrifying creativity stayed with me after the split. But don’t worry, bro, Remus is here to save your butthole!

THOMAS: If only he could avoid using that word in one of every two sentences…

REMUS: What word, “butthole”? It’s not true that I use “butthole” all the time! I used “buttocks” earlier!

[Thomas sighs in frustration]

REMUS: So, what are you thinking on, Thomas?

THOMAS: Well, as I told Roman, this is for a script writing contest, so it has to be a script, of feature length, and the theme is horror.

REMUS: Any specifics? Horror is a broad term, there are so many things we could put into the story.

THOMAS: No, no specifics. Just horror. But I don’t want anything that would be too gruesome or too extreme. [pointing at Patton] Not in front of the kids.

[Patton is wearing headphones and smiles while humming a song. Honesty is with him]

HONESTY: It’s okay, I got it with Patton. He’s distracted with the Spongebob camp song and will be okay… as long as his phone battery lasts, that is.

REMUS: [looking at Patton, then at Roman] And you’re telling me that you didn’t go crazy like me after having to cope with this kind of shenanigans all day? Okay, let’s get cracking. [he cracks his hands while saying this, making Thomas grimace] I would personally go for gruesome, because that’s the most horrifying and fun, but if you say you don’t want too gruesome, let’s stick with that. You’re the master after all, the Light Master to be exact.

ROMAN: Okay, I had thought about the story taking place in a castle…

REMUS: Boring.

ROMAN: You didn’t let me start explaining the story and you already find it boring?

REMUS: Sorry, Rommie, but a horror story taking place in a castle? That’s too cliche. Besides, there’s nothing so special with castles. Believe me, I know.

ROMAN: If you’re saying that with your own castle in mind, our experience on that castle suggests otherwise, I’m just saying.

REMUS: Oh, please, Roman, what I made you go through were just little fancy games. If those silly antics upset you, you should see the castle’s west wing on the way to my chamber of secrets next to my bedroom.

DECEIT: Why does that “chamber of secrets” thing make me shiver in disgust even though I don’t really know what’s in there?

REMUS: Oh, I call it like that for the Harry Potter book, but I’d never have secrets with you, Slimy Boi. If you want to know what’s in there, I have…

ROMAN: Remus, we have work to do, remember? If you really call yourself creativity, please behave like it and start creating.

REMUS: [shrugs] Okay, it’s your loss, anyway. I enjoy myself there all the time.

ROMAN: [sighs] So, you don’t like the castle as a horror topic. Then, what do you suggest?

REMUS: Well, my suggestion is to place horror where ever the viewer would less suspect to find it. This way, throwing it unexpectedly to him would make a bigger impact on them, don’t you think? For instance… a children’s playground in a park, in broad daylight.

THOMAS: It doesn’t look very easy to find something horrifying in a setting like that…

REMUS: That’s what makes it more challenging, Thomas. Imagine this. An invisible creature, some kind of abomination from an antediluvian era, which has been asleep for uncountable centuries, suddenly wakes up and rises to the surface, in the middle of the playground, and it starts snatching kids and… well you said you didn’t want gruesome details… [pumped up] I don’t care, I want to say this! It starts eating them alive in front of their horrified parents! Ugh… I’m so good…

THOMAS: [ironic] Thank you for omitting the gruesome details, Remus.

ROMAN: Couldn’t we use a story where kids don’t have to die?

REMUS: Yeah, we could, but it wouldn’t be as fun.

THOMAS: Roman is right, I have a reputation of working for young audiences. Suddenly releasing something as gory as that, it could damage future working opportunities for me.

REMUS: Said the guy who played J.D. from Heathers, a character who tried to blow up a whole school after murdering several students. You played that character five years ago, and your career survived afterwards. I don’t know how since you never made anything special at all, but it did.

THOMAS: That’s different, I’m an actor, I need to work on all kinds of roles to grow as a performer, and I took care of warning my viewers beforehand of the kind of show that was Heathers. But creating something from scratch, it makes you deeply involved into it. My regular audience would want to watch it and it could create a bad image of me.

REMUS: And what does prevent you from warning your viewers again? I mean, to me, it’s nothing so bad, but if you think it would be traumatizing for your audience, that could work.

LOGAN: I never thought I would ever say this, but I agree with Remus. What you did with Heathers, you can do the same with any type of creative work, Thomas. You can create anything you want and, as long as you keep everybody aware of the type of content you’ve created and that content doesn’t go against any law, you and your viewers will be fine. A creator should be allowed to evolve. They’re not forced to stick with a limited type of works for the rest of their career. You can create adult content whenever you want as long as you label it appropriately.

THOMAS: Okay, you two may have a point. But still, I don’t want children to die in my story. I want to make something I personally like, and I wouldn’t like that. It’s a question of taste, if you like.

REMUS: [groans] More like Patton’s taste, I think… No, Thomas, I don’t like it, but if that’s your final word, so be it. Let’s look for something else.

ROMAN: How about a mansion with a group of people whose members start disappearing one by one and the others get scared about who’s making them disappear?

REMUS: Roman, please, try to be original. That story has been told millions of times. “The House that Screamed”, “House on Haunted Hill”, “Maniac Mansion”… And besides, it’s not even horror, it’s the typical whodunit flick, like one of those boring Agatha Christie’s novels, where only one person dies and the rest of the time it’s just the others, or a pompous detective, going in circles to find the murderer. I mean, if I killed someone, I wouldn’t hide it, I wouldn’t mind the consequences at all.

LOGAN: [offended] Hey, take it easy! Do not besmirch Dame Agatha Christie’s – may she rest in peace – name in my presence! However, you’re right on the rest of your sentence, Remus, except the part of you murdering someone, of course. A whodunit, even though it can have some horrifying elements, is generally classified as part of the thriller or suspense genre. I don’t know if that’s exactly what the contest is asking for. They specifically ask for “horror”.

THOMAS: Yeah, that’s right.

VIRGIL: Is no one going to acknowledge that, out of the three examples Remus named, two were actual horror flicks? I know, I watched them.

REMUS: My advice is that, instead of making people disappear, we see the creatures who are snatching them in all their gruesome detail, with their sharp teeth, their red eyes, their sticky tentacles. I love tentacles, personal preference. Did I mention “Day of the Tentacle” is my favorite video game?

ROMAN: Why do you have to use gruesome creatures? Not every horror story has to be gory, in case you didn’t know.

REMUS: I know, Roman, but designing these creatures gives me more space to develop my creativity. Humanoid dangers are too dull for my taste.

ROMAN: [groans in frustration] Ugh… It’s just as I feared.

REMUS: What?

ROMAN: You and I are like water and oil, Remus. We’ll never mix well. It’s like we’ll never agree on anything at all.

REMUS: Bullsh… [bleep] , Roman. You’re just not trying hard enough.

ROMAN: I’m not trying hard enough? I’m the one pitching all the ideas and you’re the one twisting them, as you always do!

REMUS: Well, if you brought up some interesting input, then I wouldn’t have to fix anything!

ROMAN: If everything you’re gonna do is fixing my works, then I don’t want you nearby!

[Remus shows a face of utter offense and hurt]

THOMAS: Guys…

REMUS: You don’t want me nearby? What do you mean by that?

ROMAN: I mean exactly what you think I mean! Get away from me and let me work in peace!

THOMAS: Guys, please…

REMUS: So, the cat’s out of the bag at last. You recognize that you don’t want me in your life, right!?

ROMAN: [suddenly confused] Wait, what? I…

REMUS: I’m glad that you admit that! At least this time, you’ve been honest and didn’t trick me into jumping on a boat to leave me on a lost island!

ROMAN: [stuttering, not understanding anything] Wait… what is going on here? I…

REMUS: Don’t worry, bro! I’m not gonna make it difficult for you! You can go on living your perfect dreamlike life however you want, and I’ll return back to my crazy lonely life as I’ve always been! Don’t think I will suffer over losing you! I’ve lived 20 years all alone and I can live like that again whenever I want! Despite what your self-aggrandizing ego suggests you, you’re not so important, [mocking voice] your majesty!

[after saying this, Remus sinks down. Everyone stays quiet and confused for a couple of seconds]

THOMAS: What… has just happened here?

ROMAN: I wish I knew, Thomas. I thought we were having a creative discussion. I don’t know where that came from… Did I… Did I do or say something wrong? You guys sometimes call me out for not being nice when I didn’t even realize I wasn’t…

DECEIT: It’s okay, Roman. It’s not your fault. Or Remus’ fault either.

ROMAN: Dee, do you know anything about this that I don’t?

DECEIT: As a matter of fact, I do, but you should talk it out with Remus yourself. This is something between him and you that you two should fix.

ROMAN: Fix? Up to this point, I didn’t even realize there was something broken between us at all. I thought we had fixed all our disagreements these past few weeks. If you know something, please, tell me, cause I’m totally confused.

DECEIT: Okay, I’ll tell you. It’s because you’ve turned back into a Light Side.

ROMAN: What? But I thought that would be a cause of joy for him, not of anger. Now I’m more confused than before…

DECEIT: Of course he’s happy for you, Roman. But he’s also… scared.

ROMAN: Scared? Of what?

DECEIT: He thinks that you bonded with him because you were a Dark Side and had no choice but to get closer to him or being completely lonely. Now that you’re a Light Side and back with us, he thinks you’re not gonna need him anymore and he’s scared to death of losing you again.

ROMAN: But… that’s nonsense. I wouldn’t do that. My feelings for him remain the same. He’s my brother, I wouldn’t dump him out.

DECEIT: That’s what I tried to tell him the other day, to ease his concern. But I guess it didn’t work. It seems that Remus, the embodiment of intrusive thoughts, also has intrusive thoughts of his own torturing him and that thought of you hating him must be recurrent for him. Perhaps if you told him yourself… He would believe it more easily if he heard it from your own lips and your own heart.

ROMAN: I mean… it’s my own fault that he has that thought on a regular basis. After all, I did leave him behind once… but I’m not the same I used to be back then and my feelings for him are not the same as they were either. Of course I’ll go tell him. He’ll probably be in his room, right? I’ll go see him.

THOMAS: Roman, I don’t want to intrude or anything, but if you go, could we use your orb to check that everything’s going okay? I will be terribly worried otherwise.

ROMAN: Okay, seems fair. Remus doesn’t have secrets of any kind, anyway. Or so I thought. Can’t believe he talked about this first to Deceit instead of directly to me.

DECEIT: Don’t worry about that. You know when someone needs to vent, the last person they do it with is the person with whom they have the problem.

ROMAN: You’re right, I guess… [pulls out the orb and gives it to Thomas] Okay, I’ll let you watch, but if things get too personal, I’ll switch it off, okay? [sinking down] See ya in a moment, guys.

PATTON: I really hope he can make amends with him, even if I don’t like Remus’ ideas very much, it’s Roman’s brother. And today’s task is a proof that Thomas needs him just like any other of us.

HONESTY: What? I thought you were listening to your headphones, Patton…

PATTON: Oh, I switched them off long ago.

HONESTY: And the subjects they were talking about didn’t scare you?

PATTON: A bit, but with you next to me as you were, I was less afraid. I can cope with horror as long as I have my friends supporting me.

HONESTY: [flattered and emotional] Awww!

VIRGIL: [smirks] My dad is the pure incarnation of cuteness, he can’t help it.

THOMAS: Guys, the orb is turning on. Let’s see how they’re doing.

[The guys watch the orb. Roman rises up in Remus’ room. He’s nowhere to be seen]

ROMAN: Remus? Remus, where are you? [waits for a couple of seconds] I know you’re here, Remus. Stop hiding. I just want to talk to you.

[Remus pops up, serious]

REMUS: And I just want you to leave me alone, Roman. Is that so hard to ask for?

ROMAN: Not until we have talked this out, Remus.

REMUS: There’s nothing to talk about, Roman. You made it very clear in the living room. You don’t want me with you.

ROMAN: I didn’t say that!

REMUS: Yes, you did! I am a nuisance for you and you don’t want me nearby! You said it!

ROMAN: You misinterpreted me, Remus. It’s true that our working routine is too… bumpy. And I admit that it’s too hard for me to work with you because we’re too different. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to try to make it work out. I was talking out of frustration, I didn’t mean it! And I was only talking about our work, not about our life!

REMUS: Yeah, right. Do you really expect me to believe you? You’re not the most trustworthy individual in the world. I suffered the consequences of your tricks once and I’m not buying them again. I’ll break ties with you and go back to my castle alone before you decide to send me to the trash can again. I don’t want to be abandoned again. I don’t know if I could take it, and I’m scared to death to find out.

ROMAN: Brother, you’re wrong. And me using the word “brother” should already be giving you an indication. I told you many times already. You are my brother. I don’t want you out of my life again and I will never abandon you again. That Roman that hurt you so bad years ago is long gone. I have changed. I promise I’m saying the truth. I already told you these past few weeks and I really meant it.

REMUS: Bullsh… [bleep] You said all of that these past few weeks because you were stuck as a Dark Side and wanted someone to distract you from your boredom. I just happened to be the only one available, an amusement to keep you entertained and distracted from the memories of the people you really wanted to be with. Now that you have those people that you really care for back in your life, you don’t need me anymore. That’s a fact.

ROMAN: No, Remus, that’s a falsehood, as Logan would say. Yes, I missed my friends and I do care about them, but I also care about you. As I also told you, it scared me to get closer to you at first because I feared your rejection. Do you think I would care about that if I didn’t really care about you?

REMUS: Who knows? As far as I know, you’re just as dramatic as I am and you could have been overreacting in regards to that just because. After all, I don’t really know you that much. You didn’t let me, remember? And you don’t get to truly know someone in a few days.

ROMAN: Well, I want to fix that. I want you to know me and I want to know you.

REMUS: I…

ROMAN: Don’t you see that, out of fear of being dumped out, you’re the one who’s in fact dumping me out and that you are forcing to happen what right now is only happening in your mind? Please, don’t do that. It would really hurt me if you do that. And I know it would hurt yourself too, and I don’t want you to get hurt.

REMUS: I don’t want you to get hurt either, and of course I don’t want it to happen. It’s just that… [his voice starts breaking and his eyes fill with tears] I’m so scared… I love you. I’ve always loved you and I’m so scared of losing you again.

ROMAN: Then don’t make that happen for real, Remus, because I love you too, and I’m never gonna leave you again. Let’s be brothers once and for all.

[Roman hugs Remus. Remus hugs Roman back and starts sobbing on his shoulder]

REMUS. I’m sorry, Roman. I’m sorry…

ROMAN: It’s okay… brother. I’m sorry too. Calm down, okay?

[Roman looks right at the camera from the orb with a gesture of apologize, and the orb turns off]

LOGAN: Well, I guess Roman wants some moments of privacy now.

THOMAS: I understand. I’m relieved, though, to see that at least they’re fixing things up. But now, what are we going to do with the contest? I can’t create any horror without Roman and Remus. So what are we going to…

[Suddenly, Romulus rises up in Roman’s place by surprise]

THOMAS: [scared] What!? Romulus!? You’re back? What is going on here!?

ROMAN: It’s okay, Thomas. It’s me, Roman. The original Roman before Remus and I split up.

THOMAS: [frowns] Suspicious… I don’t know if I should trust you. Maybe I should break you up like the last time, just in case…

ROMAN: [scared] Please, don’t do that, Thomas, don’t force us to split again. Last time, you turned me into a Dark Side. Next time, I may not live to see another day.

DECEIT: I think he’s saying the truth, Thomas.

THOMAS: Are you sure, Dee?

DECEIT: You know I can catch a liar from miles away, Thomas, and he’s not lying. It’s Roman.

ROMAN: Thank you, Dee.

THOMAS: Okay, if you say so, Deceit. Well, what happened, Roman?

ROMAN: I’m not entirely sure. When we were hugging, I felt a heartwarming sensation, and suddenly Remus joined into me. And here I am.

THOMAS: It’s weird. I thought you couldn’t join together again, and the result certainly has been a lot different from the last time when that hideous Romulus almost replaced both of you.

LOGAN: I’ve got a theory. Maybe working out your issues has had a beneficial effect, Roman. The last time, you joined because of your mutual unhealthy dependence of each other and the result was a distorted and unstable fusion that eventually became Romulus. Then you lost your capacity of fusion because of the trauma of the abrupt separation, and later, when you recovered, Remus’ fears could have acted as a hindering block, figuratively like one of those deadlock seals from Doctor Who that the sonic screwdriver couldn’t unlock. Now, all hinders are gone and, most importantly, the fusion has been born from your love for each other instead of any kind of dependence, and as such the original Roman came out as a result and not the corrupt Romulus.

PATTON: It’s what I always say, then. Love fixes everything.

THOMAS: But are you sure you’re gonna be okay, Roman? And what about Remus?

ROMAN: That’s worrying me a bit too, Thomas. Logan, now that you’ve mentioned Doctor Who, and since you are our own Doctor on this team…

LOGAN: That’s the biggest compliment you’ve ever given me, Roman, thank you.

ROMAN: …would you mind doing me a medical checkup, please, just to be sure?

LOGAN: Not at all, Roman. Allons-y!

THOMAS: I hope he doesn’t pull out a sonic screwdriver… That would be cool but this is serious business…

PATTON: [happily] Since Logan is the Doctor, can I be his companion, please!?

[Logan blushes for a second, then he clears his throat, approaches Roman and puts his hand on Roman’s chest. Logan starts shaking for a few seconds, then takes his hand off and goes back to his place]

LOGAN: As far as I know, Roman. You’re totally fine. Your form is stable, you’re still a Light Side and if you wanted, you could stay like this permanently. It’s your natural state as you were born, so that shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone.

ROMAN: …but? Because I sense you’re gonna say “but”.

LOGAN: But… if you stay like this for more than a couple of hours a day, Remus will disappear and become part of you, making the fusion irreversible. Also your traditional form as Roman would disappear forever. You’d be stuck as you are right now forever. No more Netflix-Kids-and-Family-Roman. And before you mention it, Thomas, the intrusive thoughts would still be there, only that they would be served by Roman, whether he likes it or not.

ROMAN: No, I don’t like that. And I don’t want my brother gone now that we made amends. But couldn’t I force the split like I did 20 years ago when Remus was born?

LOGAN: You may try, but I doubt it would work now, and besides, some different Sides would appear as a result. It wouldn’t be the same Remus as we know him, and we don’t know how much of the Roman we know would be left. It’s too big of a risk.

ROMAN: You’re right. I’ll split up soon. But first, I think we could take this chance to help Thomas with his contest. In my full form I get all kinds of great ideas for a horror flick.

THOMAS: That sounds cool, if we do it quick. I don’t want you two to get into any risks because of me.

ROMAN: Of course. You said we had around two hours, right? Then let’s get to work right now.

THOMAS: Okay. [to the viewers] Well, we’ve got a lot of work to do and very little time, so, until next time, take it easy, guys, gals and non binary pals. Peace out!

[end card]

[Logan is in his room. Patton rises up]

PATTON: Hi, Logan.

LOGAN: Oh, hello, Patton. How are you?

PATTON: I’m fine. Roman and Thomas are still working on their horror story, so I stepped out.

LOGAN: Yeah, fiction is not my department, so I decided to dedicate some time to catch up on some books I’ve had for some time.

PATTON: Oh, I see you’re reading Roman’s story, the one he gave you for your Secret Santa two years ago.

LOGAN: Yeah, please don’t tell him it took me so long to read it. I’d say I didn’t have a free second to read it until now, and as a matter of fact, I’ve been busy all this time because Thomas has been busy all this time. But, to be honest, I forgot about it until Remus mentioned Agatha Christie in our debate earlier and I remembered Roman wrote me a Sherlock Holmes mystery story just for me that I still hadn’t read. Roman would be really offended if he found out and I don’t want to hurt him.

PATTON: It’s okay, Logan. You always had the intention of reading it someday and that’s what matters. And what do you think about it so far?

LOGAN: The story is very good. Roman really knows me well and what I like most of a fictional story. I’m enjoying it very much. It’s too bad I didn’t read it sooner. I wish he makes me more presents like this in years to come.

PATTON: I’m glad that you mention presents, because… I came here because I have a present for you.

LOGAN: [closing the book] A present? For me? But why? Christmas is long over and my birthday is many months from now.

PATTON: Just because, Logan, like when you gave me this cat hoodie as a present. There was no reason, other than how much we love each other. [pulling out a wrapped box] Platonically, of course.

LOGAN: [blushes] Of course… And what is it?

PATTON: Open it and you’ll find out.

[Patton gives Logan the box. He opens it and takes out the content]

LOGAN: Is this… a sonic screwdriver? Like the one used by the Ninth and Tenth Doctor from Doctor Who?

PATTON: Yep, I loved the idea of you as the Doctor and me as the companion, so I decided to give you this for the occasion. Do you like it?

LOGAN: Like it? It’s… fantastic! Thank you so much, Patton!

PATTON: You’re welcome. It makes me so happy that you like it, Logan.

LOGAN: Patton… I owe you an apology.

PATTON: What? An apology? For what?

LOGAN: For the treatment I have given to you in the past. I have consciously belittled your opinions so many times, and you never held it against me.

PATTON: Oh, don’t worry about that, Logan. I’ve always thought of it as you being grumpy, but I’ve always known you never really meant it.

LOGAN: How could you know that, Patton, when I didn’t know it myself?

PATTON: Well, when you’re an expert on feelings, you become aware of them. Feelings are not just about knowing them, Logan, it’s more about feeling them.

LOGAN: It has no logic… Of course it doesn’t, they’re feelings. Maybe that’s the reason I was such a… a jerk. I didn’t understand feelings, so I rejected them, and since you are the embodiment of Thomas’ feelings, I rejected you too. Will you please forgive me?

PATTON: There’s nothing to forgive, but if it will make you feel better, I forgive you, Logan.

LOGAN: Thank you, Patton, I… I…

[Logan looks at Patton, unable to speak. Before he knows how it happened, he approaches Patton and kisses him on the cheek, next to the corner of the mouth. Patton shows a face of surprise and shock, stroking his cheek where Logan kissed him. Logan gets nervous]

LOGAN: I… I’m sorry, I don’t know where that came from, I…

PATTON: [with a cute smirk, he puts his finger on Logan's mouth to shut him up, then he looks at him with a loving glance] You certainly took your time to confess it, Teach. I love you too, Logan.

LOGAN: I didn’t conf… mmm...

[Logan shows a glance of shock when Patton starts kissing him on the lips, interrupting him mid sentence, then he just closes his eyes as he hugs Patton and kisses him back]

[nadziejastar]

I'm thoroughly enjoying the LeaIsa discourse, especially Isa possibly having been subject X in perhaps another canon. Isa's symbolism's also seem intentionally feminine in nature. I've head-cannoned that the current subject X in game could have somehow had her heart spirited away into Isa's (mirroring Sora and Kairi's situation, except the heart being far more buried in the depth's of Isa's). An unlikely scenario is that Isa was AFAB as a child and even Lea doesn't know about it or remember.

Lea: The Wounded Healer

Thank you! Yeah, everything about Isa’s symbolism is feminine in nature. And very intentionally so, LOL. He’s the Yin to Lea’s Yang; the Moon to his Sun. I love the whole concept, and I wish it wasn’t so taboo to step outside of gender boxes. The mythology is that Twin Flames separate and go through many lifetimes apart, never meeting in person. Over the reincarnation cycle, the two lovers balance their masculine and feminine sides so that they are both perfectly balanced. And I do think Lea is a very balanced character in that regard. I’m sure Isa was, too. During their final lifetime in the reincarnation cycle, Twin Flames finally reunite and change the world with their divine spiritual love. 

I cannot imagine there’s any other explanation than Isa originally being Subject X. It simply makes way too much sense, and all the pieces fit perfectly. Your head canon is interesting. I prefer that over canon where Isa and Lea are apprentices and had NO connection to the experiments on the darkness of the heart. That just makes no sense at all. They could have had another girl involved without taking away from Lea and Isa’s tragic backstory. Another reason I like Isa being Subject X is that he would need healing, and Lea would need to give him a “birth by sleep”. KH3 kinda forgot about that whole concept. But there’s a lot of evidence that it was supposed to be a HUGE aspect of Lea’s character arc. Would have been a lot more rewarding to see than what he did in canon.

Stuff like this is exactly why Lea and Isa are my favorite characters. I can tell the writers had a hard on for them, too. Nomura really loved Axel, after all. Axel has a weapon called Prometheus which incorporates the Sagittarius symbol, and so do the vast majority of Saïx’s weapons. Moreover, the arrow is mainly prominent in Saïx’s Berserk form, which is where I think his captured heart resides. Now, why is this symbol so important? Because Sagittarius is Chiron, the Wounded Healer! He gave up his immortality for Prometheus, and was rewarded with immortality in the stars!

More About Sagittarius

Yen Sid: “I must warn you again–the road will not be easy.”

Lea: “Fine. Let’s jump right in.”

Ruled by Jupiter, the planet of growth and opportunity, the sign of the Archer is an eternal student, looking for enlightenment through new ideas, people, and places. Sagittarius is on the hunt for the biggest, best experiences life has to offer. They have a positive and outgoing personality that makes them the life of any party. With a love of adventure and all things exotic, the worldly Archer just wants to soak it all in. Sagittarius is driven by a constant need to explore and expand its mind, heart, and awareness to the fullest extent. Fiery and free, Sagittarius knows that the only limits are the ones we create ourselves.

Chiron: The Wounded Healer

Naminé: “And if the hurt is too great for you to bear it alone–well, then you turn to a friend close to your heart.”

Wounded healer is a term created by psychologist Carl Jung. The idea states that an analyst is compelled to treat patients because the analyst himself is “wounded”. For Jung, “it is his own hurt that gives a measure of his power to heal. This, and nothing else, is the meaning of the Greek myth of the wounded physician.”

Chiron was in outstanding pain and anguish; there was no medication that would ease the infliction. The fact was, even the gifted physician Chiron couldn’t heal himself. The next problem was that Chiron was in torment but, immortal. Chiron was not able to obtain freedom from the pain with the onset of death. In such a scenario, Chiron volunteered himself as a replacement for Prometheus, who had been penalized by the gods for giving fire to humankind; His punishment was to be enchained to a giant stone. Day-after-day an aquila descended and polished off his liver, which grew once more as it got dark …only to be consumed by the eagle once again.

So in essence, Chiron forfeited his eternal life so man could have use of fire. Hercules had been appealing to Zeus (Jupiter) for help, and Hercules agreed to supply an appropriate replacement for Prometheus, thereby setting him free. Thus, Chiron replaced Prometheus, gave up eternity, and went to Tartarus (the Underworld) in Prometheus’ stead. Zeus witnessed everything that happened and he knew how deplorable his son Hercules felt. Zeus afforded the dear Centaur a resting place in the heavens, as the constellation Sagittarius the Archer, in recognition of his benevolence and perpetuity.

Chiron and Artemis

Axel: “Why do I always get stuck with the icky jobs?”

Saïx has a weapon called Artemis, after the moon goddess. Artemis has a relationship to Chiron. Centaurs were notorious for being wild, lusty, overly indulgent drinkers and carousers, violent when intoxicated, and generally uncultured delinquents. Chiron, by contrast, was intelligent, civilized and kind, because he was not related directly to the other centaurs due to his parentage. Soon after giving birth to Chiron, his mother abandoned him out of shame and disgust. Chiron, effectively orphaned, was later found by the god Apollo, who decided to take him in as his son.

Apollo taught to him the art of music, lyre, archery, medicine and prophecy. Apollo’s twin sister, Artemis taught him more about archery and hunting. Chiron’s uniquely peaceful character, kindness and intelligence is attributed to Apollo and Artemis. Artemis only loved one man, Orion. She killed him by accident after being tricked into thinking the he was a villain who had attacked one of her priestesses. Orion, whilst swimming to escape a giant scorpion, is killed by Artemis’ arrows after the goddess could only see his distant bobbing head and failed to recognize the hunter. Artemis tried to bring Orion back to life, but was unable. It was Artemis’ regret at the loss of her hunting companion which allowed him to become a constellation and gain immortality amongst the stars.

Sagittarius Mythology also figures in the tale of Orion. One Greek mythology tale tells of how Sagittarius the Archer was directed to shoot down Scorpio the Scorpion, which had been sent off to murder Orion. This story gives the reason why the Archer’s arrow is aimed toward the ‘heart of the scorpion’.

Friendship

Ven: “Already?”

Lea: “I’ll see ya when I see ya. After all, we’re friends now. Get it memorized.”

Ven: “Okay, Lea.”

Sagittarius make excellent friends because of their encouraging, positive nature and their kind heart that will do anything to make sure the friend is happy. They do not expect favors in return; their kindness is selfless. They do not interfere with other people’s plans and they are never possessive or jealous. They treat others the way they want to be treated and live life based on a ‘live and let live’ policy, making them very agreeable. They are excellent conversationalists with a good sense of humor. Sometimes their humor is the raw truth, but these people speak their mind and don’t hold anything back. What they say is what they mean. They do not like mind games; they like straightforwardness and expect it in return.

Axel: “C'mon, let’s get some ice cream.”

Roxas: “Why?”

Axel: “Whaddaya mean, why? Because we’re friends.”

Roxas: “So…friends are people who have ice cream together?”

Axel: “Sort of… That, or laugh at stupid stuff that doesn’t make any sense. Like those kids we just saw–they were friends. C'mon, I’ll show you how it works.”

Sagittarius are known for saying the ‘painful truth’. On the other hand, people know that they can trust what they say because they always say what is real. They never hide anything and are very likable people. The only people that might not get along with them are people that live by a daily agenda with a highly structured, organized life. They are likely to always be running late and miss a date, but this is only because they are so forward thinking that they forget about the present. Tolerance is required. They do not do these things on purpose; this is just who they are. If you understand this and accept this, having a Sagittarius in your life will make the sun shine a lot brighter.

Axel: “Best friends are willing to deal with complications.”

Wise and understanding Sagittarius is connected to the Temperance Tarot card. The gentle process of tempering is about finding a perfect middle state, and combining the best of all things to forge something that is stronger than the sum of its parts. By bringing the power of the philosophical world into their physical world, Sagittarius makes itself a source of ultimate truth and awareness.

Both Sagittarius and the Temperance card are constantly striving for a more enlightened state of being. The angel in the Tarot card here demonstrates this by slowly pouring the liquid from one golden cup into another – a process called “tempering” (a slow process of integration that leads to the perfect middle state). Similarly, Sagittarius accomplishes this by exploring the far reaches of both the physical and philosophical world to expand on or “temper” what is already known. The symbols of Temperance mean the following:

Angel: Interacting with the material world while maintaining a sense of spirituality and higher purpose.

Triangle: Interplay of masculine and feminine or spirituality and materiality.

Cups: The fountain of energy between your opposite tendencies, which is flowing and spontaneous yet also balanced and coherent.

Path: Taking your time through life’s twists and turns; being content in the moment or throughout unexpected obstacles.

Water: Groundedness and refreshment through spiritual thinking.

Mountains: The distant journeys awaiting you that will bring you to spiritual fulfillment.

Sun: The sun, also appearing as the angel’s third eye, represents the merging of personal aims with the universe���s plans for you.

Fire Wings: Muscles and strength necessary to maintain composure and reach a higher being state.

The Angel

Axel: “As long as we remember each other, we’ll never be apart. Got it memorized?”

The Angel’s beautiful, red wings represent blood or life, while the triangle on her dress means spirit – also the elemental symbol for fire. And, similar to adventurous Sagittarius, the angel’s feet are also symbolic of the eternal pilgrimage or spiritual journey. By showing one foot in the water and the other on the shore we are reminded that our greatest wisdom lies in the art of balancing. And lastly, the iris flowers are indicative of the Goddess Iris who provides the link between God and humanity. Like Sagittarius, she travels from one end of the world to another – building upon something that is bigger and brighter than herself.

In a general context, the Temperance Tarot card represents coolness in the face of shifting emotional tides. Temperance is the ability to control one’s temper or temperament. In Thailand there is a concept called “cool heart.” In this phrase, cool does not mean cruel and unemotional. Rather, to act with a “cool heart” means that one is not easily stirred or provoked to go off the handle; one does not quickly come to a raging boil but maintains a steady temperature despite shifting external circumstances. Similarly, Temperance stands with one foot in a cool stream and pours water from one cup into another. Temperance knows how to direct the water in a way that maintains homeostasis.

The 7 of Swords

Lea: “And if the darkness gets ya, I promise I’ll bail you out. “Dark Rescue” is my middle name.”

Axel’s weapon “Prometheus” is Lift Gear. This is the same gear that the Temperance Arcana in Luxord’s deck is listed under. Coincidence? I think not. Luxord’s card has the shape of the Minor Arcana, The 7 of Swords. In general, this card is said to be about betrayal and deception. It is sometimes called the ‘Thief’ card. In a general context, it represents deception, lies, trickery, cheating and lack of conscience. This card also signifies mental manipulation, tactics, scheming, cunning, enemies who masquerade as friends and spies in your camp. It represents escaping detection and getting away with something.

On a more positive note, the 7 of Swords points out that you need to be strategic in what you do. It can also represent flexibility, adaptability, sharp wit, and resourcefulness. You know you cannot do everything at once – nor should you. Instead, you must prioritize what’s important to you and direct your focus and attention on the few tasks that will move you closer to your goals. When this card is seen in a reading, the deception is usually short lived. Nobody is able to carry away 7 swords and get away with it. So although the party may feel smug about it at the time, it’s about to blow up in their face.

Sagittarius’ Ruling Planet: Jupiter

Lea: “I want everybody I meet to remember me. Inside people’s memories, I can live forever.”

Isa: “I know I won’t forget you. Believe me, I try all the time.”

Lea: “See, I’m immortal!”

Larger-than-life Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter, the planet of luck and expansion. In Roman mythology, Jupiter was the king of the gods, the biggest and the best. In Astrology Jupiter is known as the “benefic” planet, meaning it is the luckiest, most opportunistic planet of all. This positive energy influences Sagittarius’ optimistic, enlightening, and outgoing nature that shines and spreads through anyone they come into contact with. As the largest planet in our cosmos, Jupiter’s vastness encourages Sagittarius to stretch its mind and heart as far as it can.

Sagittarius’ Symbol: The Archer

Xigbar: “You’re not supposed to be here!”

Lea: “Promises to keep. I’ll always be there to get my friends back. What, bad timing? You had your perfect little script, but you kinda forgot to write the sequel. Now, let’s find out what happens!”

The zodiac sign Sagittarius is associated with the Archer, and its glyph represents an arrow. Always eager to explore new horizons, the Archer sets its sights on a faraway target, then shoots toward it with precision. This focus on learning more, doing more, and seeing more is what Sagittarius is all about.

Ruled by expansive Jupiter, Sagittarius is big-hearted, open, and always looking beyond a checklist. A Sagittarius rarely has a “type.” They are always intrigued by the individual, and don’t make any assumptions about people until they’ve truly met and spoken with them. Sagittarius loves witty back and forth banter. A Sagittarius in love is a sight to behold. Aggressively fun, this sign usually moves full speed ahead once they have their love target ‘locked’.

Selene

Ventus: “I remember dreaming a lot. Of you and Terra. Of Sora and his friends too, I think. And there were some more people I didn’t recognize. Oh, and I saw these weird animal creatures! It’s like…I’ve been part of some big adventure.”

Saïx has a weapon named Selene, after the chaste Greek Moon goddess. It’s shaped like a torch. Selene’s torch has an interesting role in art and history. Selene was taken with Endymion, a beautiful youth who tended his flocks on Mount Latmos. She accompanied Cupid and used the light of the torch to gaze upon the mortal she fell in love with while he slept.  

Girodet’s “The Sleep of Endymion” shows the moment that Cupid parts the trees so the Moon may shine her light down upon her sleeping lover’s face. Only at night when he is asleep does she quietly creep down to him, accompanied by Cupid, whose torch symbolizes burning love.

In a Roman floor mosaic from the third century CE, the scene focuses on the moment when Selene falls in love with the young mortal shepherd. Cupid, in the upper right corner, points down at Endymion as if guiding Selene’s gaze towards him. Selene steps out of her bull-drawn biga that she uses to pull the moon across the sky each night, and raises a lit torch that illuminates Endymion’s face in the darkness. She peers down at him longingly. Endymion is fast asleep and unaware of her presence. She was so in love that she asked Zeus to give Endymion immortal life.

Sagittarius’ Ruling House: 9th House of Expansion

Roxas: “I found out about love on today’s mission–that it’s something powerful.”

Axel: “That’s true. It is. But I’ll never get to experience it.”

As the 9th sign in the zodiac, Sagittarius rules over the 9th House of Expansion. This house reveals how open our minds are, and how much we expand ourselves through education, exploration, and life lessons. From philosophical conversations to book research to world travel, the 9th house encourages you to go further than you’ve ever gone before. Sagittarius’ drive for adventure, growth, and awareness is strongly represented here.

When Venus is in Sagittarius

Axel: “Love is what happens if there’s something really special between two people.”

Saïx’s weapon Horoscope incorporates the Venus and Sagittarius symbols while in its Berserk form. So, the astrological correspondence is Venus in Sagittarius. Venus is the planet of love, self-worth, and all things beautiful. Her style is sweet, cooperative, and peaceful. But when this graceful planet’s energy mixes with the free-spirited sign of Sagittarius, her joyful side comes out to play. Hearts come out of hiding while Venus moves through Sagittarius. The happy and free energy of Sagittarius turns Venus up a few notches, encouraging us to live life to the fullest. This is a time to socialize, to try new things, and to look for love in different places.

Sagittarius is the sign of the adventurer, so when Venus is traveling through this sign, we find ourselves drawn to exotic people, places, and experiences. Old routines and worn-out relationships are at risk of being traded in for something bigger, brighter, and better while Venus is in Sagittarius. We want to expand beyond our usual boundaries, and may give up some of our comfortable patterns of the past to try out new experiences. Love needs to grow during this transit – it will not stand still.

Sagittarius’ Element: Fire

No. VIII AXEL—An assassin who puts his own agenda first, and everything else on the back burner. Wields fire.

The zodiac sign Sagittarius is a Fire sign that lights up our lives with profound questions and exciting ideas. Just like an uncontrollable wildfire, this sign will happily go where the wind takes them to seek new experiences. Sagittarius uses its Fire energy on its lifelong journey of exploration, always ready to jump at the next adventure. The element of Fire continues to fuel Sagittarius’ never ending supply of optimism and inspiration.

The Goddess Hestia: The Keeper of the Flame

Axel: “Well, I think you can be inseparable, even if you’re apart. It’s like, if you feel really close to each other. Like best friends.”

Saïx’s weapons Moonrise and Moonset are shaped like ⚶ the astrological symbol for the asteroid Vesta, also known as Hestia in Greek mythology. Her name means “the essence”, the true nature of things. Hestia was the Greek Goddess of the sacred fire. She was the most influential and widely revered of the goddesses. She was was one of the three ‘virgin’ goddesses, next to Athena and Artemis. Hestia was depicted as a beautiful and bashful woman, usually seated. The living flame of Hestia was tended constantly and never allowed to die out, for it represented the energy of all life.

Hestia was a kind goddess and had a discrete character. She never left her residence, the sacred mountain of Olympus. She never involved herself in the fights and machinations of the other gods and goddesses, somehow managing to stay above the fray. Non-judgmental and forgiving, her unconditional love and calm acceptance inspired the love and trust of others in return. Dependable and caring, she was always there for them and helped them to manage their lives, which were certainly more exciting than her own. These virtues define the goddess Hestia: mild, gentle, forgiving, peaceful, serene, dignified, calm, secure, stable, welcoming, and, above all else, well-centered.

Sagittarius’ Color: Purple

Axel: “You know, I’ve been thinking about something Naminé said. Roxas…are you really sure that you don’t have a heart? Is it possible that we all have one? You, me, her… Or is that just wishful thinking?”

Rich and luscious purple is the color of Sagittarius. Purple is a color of abundance, which encourages Sagittarius’ natural luck and its drive to expand its mind and world. The color purple is also associated with spirituality and enlightenment, empowering Sagittarius’ philosophical explorations and lifelong quest for knowledge.

The Sun

Axel: “Hey, Roxas. Bet you don’t know why the sun sets red. You see, light is made up of lots of colors. And out of all those colors, red is the one that travels the farthest.”

Roxas: “Like I asked! Know-it-all.”

Saïx’s weapons Orbit and Lunar Phase incorporate the Sagittarius symbol with the combined stars of Ishtar and Shamash. There’s also a Recusant’s sigil visible over the Sun symbol. The Sun, the giver of life, represents our conscious mind in astrology. It represents our will to live and our creative life force. Just as the planets revolve around the Sun in our solar system, we derive our life purpose from the Sun in our natal charts. The Sun is our ego. It is the part of us that reasons things out, and makes final decisions. The Sun is our basic identity, and represents self-realization. The Sun also represents our overall vitality. The happiest people on this earth are those who identify with the Sun’s expression.

Sagittarius’ Quality: Mutable

Axel: “Let’s meet again in the next life.”

Roxas: “Yeah. I’ll be waiting.”

As the last sign of autumn, Sagittarius helps us celebrate one last hoorah as fall comes to a close and the season of hibernation begins. Sagittarius, with a love for variety and change, uses its Mutable energy to shake the fiery radiance off the leaves and allow them to fall. As winter approaches, this Fire sign keeps us going by fueling our desire for adventure and fun, and helps us remain optimistic that light and warmth will return again.

[langwrites]

Tag Game: OC Interview

Tagged By: @owlsofstarlight

Rules: Pick a character from your WIP, and have them answer these 15 questions, then tag 15 people!

1. What is your full name?

“Khalil ibn Naviyd al-Fulan! Though I guess if you wanted to be extremely technical and kind of a pedant, you could keep going back through Baba’s family as far as you wanted. Past a certain point, even he loses track.” 

2. What does your full name mean?

”Khalil, son of Naviyd, of the town called Fulan. The town’s name is probably longer, and I kind of left out Jad, but he doesn’t have a Mishik name anymore. Baba says he picked the name ‘Copernicus’ for some reason, but at that point he was already on a ship to go shoot generals in Alanris, so I guess they aren’t talking.”

3. What are your nicknames/other names?

“Nicknames? Well, most people just call me Khalil. I only break out the full name if I want to make a point to someone. Sometimes strangers have already heard of Baba before I ever meet them.

“I honestly think most people think of me more as ‘that one wild Mishik boy’ if they don’t know my name. I’ve also lied a few times and said my name was Sohrab or something, but those only need to work for a few seconds.”

4. Whats your gender?

”I’ve always thought of myself as a boy, or a man once I got older. Mitra said the trick is that I absorbed all the gender stuff in the womb from my twin. Which is her. It’s what makes me so charming.”

“Damn annoying is what it makes you.”

“Pffff, I love you too.”

5. Whats your sexuality?

“I’m into basically everyone equally. But I’m not really into...uh, romance? Kinda can’t stand it. I don’t really want to ‘settle down’ with anybody, ether. I’m kind of a live-and-let-love guy, which pertains to me, too.”

(He’s aromantic pansexual.)

6. Where are you from?

“Gabilan! It’s this city in the mountains way the hell out in the middle of nowhere on the edges of Kaltekan territory. We’ve got magic--magic people, magic sheep, magic holes in the sky that spit out monsters every week--and also plain old everything. And a lake.

“Most people expect Mishik to be from somewhere else--blah blah racism--but my parents went there after the Kaltekan Civil War because it was being put together by Baba’s friend. It didn’t quite work out that way, but hey, nobody ever made a cake without breaking a mountain or two.

“What’s with the funny look?”

7. How old are you?

“Twenty! And I bet you nobody in my old group thought I’d do it with all my fingers. They owe me money now!”

8. What is your magic form/species?

”I’m Mishik, which means I’m a human who’s descended from the people chosen by the gods. Apparently. Baba never really said so, but basically we’re the people who are way more likely to be mages than everybody else. Something like one in four of us, and that counts for anybody who’s even part-Mishik, too.”

“That said, uh. Most mages aren’t exactly like me. I get to have a spirit yelling in my head about responsibility. I’m not sure what it is, exactly, but it’s loud as fuck and definitely has a lot of scales. It’s where my magic comes from.

“A lot of people have Others, but most of them have them there. They’re real and touchable. I just get a nag.”

9. What does your human form look like?

“Can’t you tell? I’m a human person.

“Fine, fine, I’ll give it a spin. I’m five-foot-seven, ish? My skin’s pretty dark, and my hair’s black and curly unless I fix it somehow. Eyes? I have them. Blueish-green and with the Mishik iris rings, since that’s a thing we’re known for, and I’ve got the best smile in town. Any town. Just ask!

“Hmmm. I’ve also got three piercings in each ear. I’d get a nose ring if Baba didn’t already have one, since that makes me look more like him. Therefore: old. And I guess I dress like a Kaltekan, but robes are a pain! If I can’t climb a cliff in it, I’ll hold off until I’m ordered to wear it.

“Unless it’s a party. Then let me break out the everything.”

10. What’s your aesthetic?

”What’s an aesthe--Oh. Hm. You know, that’s a good question. I like plenty of things, but it’s been a while since I had to think about what defines me.”

“I think I’d start with stones. Gemstones, sure, but also sandstone and granite rock faces and things like that. But before you even get out of my magic preferences, we’d have to talk about pretty patterns on silk and in flowers, and absolutely mirrors have to be in there somewhere. Smoke, too. Probably a ton of other things I’m forgetting.”

11. Who’s your best friend?

“It’s a tie! Two of my favorite people in the world are Oceanus and Allie, and they’re sort of like a weird cross between friends and siblings. I make them want to roll their eyes so hard they fall right out of their heads.

“Though nowadays, I like the idea of expanding my friend-circle. Tirane’s a good one for that. Or horizons. I forget which.”

12. Would you ever get a piercing/tattoo?

“Way ahead of you! Ear piercings so far. Navel later, I think. No nose rings ever, unless Baba finally admits he’s past forty and takes his out.”

13. When are you happiest?

“When on an adventure! It’s even better with friends.”

14. What’s your biggest secret?

”...Despite what you’d think, I actually do take some things seriously.”

“And I’m aware enough of my shortcomings to know that’s exactly what my Other wants me to fucking figure out. It’s just...not something I can do right now.

“And that bastard doesn’t deserve to win at anything over me.” 

15. What was your first impression of ______?

“Of Riyaz? Sleepyhead. Turns out he actually has a personality when it’s not two hours past midnight, and that personality is a great one to hang out with if you’re in a lazy mood.

“Tirane’s fun, which I got right the first time we met!

“Oceanus was this half-size feral child who literally bit me once. But we’re friends now, and it’s pretty fun to hang out and fail horribly at fishing while he laughs at me.

“Oh, and I absolutely loved Alena the first time I saw her. She was a shy little girl who literally hid from me behind her aunt. And then it turned out she read better than I do and wanted to fix that problem for me, and then I was the one hiding. It’s quite the reversal!

“And I had to get a second impression of Mitra, because Mother botched the first one. Mitra’s fun to piss off all the time. But I wish we had more time together as kids, you know?

Tagging: @abalisk, @writer-and-artist27, @ezzelbean and anyone else who’d like to do this. :D

[jq37]

sooo.... what’s the tea on the new ep? :)

**spoilers for family in flames**

I have so much to say I’m not drafting this on tumblr lest it crash and I lose a soul-crushing amount of yelling into the void.

And, I gotta say, THIS episode is the reason I haven’t posted my adult rankings list yet. THIS RIGHT HERE. I KNEW some crap was gonna go down and force me to make some HUGE adjustments.

Also, We are feeling vindicated in this house today! But let’s start from the top and work our way down.

“Raise your hands if you really care about your parents.”

Fabian having to be like, “Look, your parents suck but don’t you have siblings?” (Kristen: Ugh, I guess)

Adaine pointing out that she cares about Gorgug’s parents.

Brennan listening to them argue about what to do like he doesn’t know they’re about to be arrested for a whole ass MONTH.

Fig wanting to method act while texting the phone, pretending to be scared.

So is the arcade owner (Frank Dunford) relevant? Brennan had the name on hand. But maybe it was just him being a good worldbuilder and anticipating the question. I feel like it’s probably that because this is late in the game to be introducing new people who are super relevant.

“Gilear’s got a little knife”

I KNEW those arcade prizes were gonna be gear they could pick up! ALWAYS RAID THE ROOM. Some of that stuff might have helped in the fight. I loved the group silently reading the cards and exchanging them to whoever they thought it would help most in the background as Brennan did the ID spell.

“This has been, if I may say so, the *best* use of the identify spell.”

I love that Adaine thanks everyone, including her inanimate spells. She’s just a good person.

OK so this episode addressed a LOT of questions I had about how these literal children were getting away with all of these murders and such. Apparently, the adventuring academy kids traditionally just get away with this stuff because of Arthur’s influence and the nature of adventurers.

Adaine coming in hot with the diplomatic immunity and then remembering, oh wait, we’re at war w/ Falinel.

Fig immediately starting smoking when she gets arrested.

I love the federal agent outsider with perspective coming in and being rightfully horrified by the absolute nonsense that’s been going on the past 15 episodes.

Is Riz’s mom the only competent cop at this station? Is there a one competent adult per location rule?

Bill Seacaster Upon Learning the Bad Kids are In Jail: Did you try to escape?

“How are things going?”/“I mean bad. I’m in jail.”

Fig upon offhandedly and indirectly being called a vigilante by Sklonda: Thank you.

Emily loses it whenever anything happens in Gilear’s orbit.

Wild that Adaine decided to spontaneously call Goldenhoard considering what happened later. Like, it wasn’t a completely out of nowhere decision and it was totally logical but they could have easily overlooked that decision. 

Like, I know things happen later that make this kinda moot but I loved Goldenhoard’s conversation with Adaine in jail. “Don’t to talk to anyone without a lawyer and kill anyone you have to to get out. The school will pay for the rezzes.”/“That’s exactly what our plan was. God, I love this school.”

Although, sidenote, I feel like you can only easily rez someone within a minute? Like, I know there are other D&D spells that let you do it after a longer period of time but with the whole phoenix egg thing and the fact that they haven’t come up so far, I feel like Brennan isn’t using the in this setting for stakes reasons.

Man that whole conversation with Fig and her mom. Emily plays Fig so balls to the wall that I kinda forget sometimes that she’s actually an intelligent adult woman who knows what she’s doing with the character so I really shouldn’t be surprised with how well she stuck the emotional beats of this episode.

Gorthalax man! TyraWeWereAllRootingForYou.gif If he left, like, actually left and isn’t just held up somehow, then that’s gonna be really not great for Fig’s general psyche. 

Kristen COMPLETELY undercutting the moment by point blank asking if they had sex.

No wonder Sandra-Lynn was so worried about Fig. She was totally Fig growing up. Which, lol, she’s not even half tiefling. She was just *like that*

Oh so Gilear has always been super lame. Good to know.

Fig: I think I have mommy issues./The Rest of the Party: You have all the issues.

Fabian: You’re trying to hook up with a 25 year old adult./Fig: What do you mean trying?I’m successfully kissing him once every couple weeks. (Which, lol but also I’m glad that’s as far as it got…you know if it has to go any amount forward).

They just let Bill into the cell?????

Lou when Zac rolls a 1 for perception on Bill Secaster and he knows what’s coming: Don’t fucking do this. (Everyone else: Already trying not to lose it)

Zac’s Gorgug being contemplative and also completely wrong face is so funny to me every time.

“Why would you kill me?”/“Why would you know that?”

Who is more insane? Gorgug for suggesting him and Fabian could be twins (aren’t they different ages????) or Bill for thinking he’s so awesome he could somehow do that?

Kristen trying to help FIg distract Bill by blurting out, “Have you ever had sex?” After the conversation where he said point blank he’s slept with 100s of orc women. 

Fabian yelling at his dad is kinda undercut by continuing to call him papa in the most poncy accent.

I don’t think I’ve articulated this properly before but this episode really drove it home: Fabian and Bill have a *close* relationship but not an entirely healthy one. Like, better than Adaine and her parents by leaps and bounds but he wrestled his son in a jail cell while his friends just watched. Like, who does that?

Imagine if Riz had tried to get between Bill and Fabian. 

Also imagine being the rest of the party just sitting there, watching that go down.

“We’ve spent so much of our lives obsessed with our dads and we’ve completely ignored our moms.”/“You’re just again talking about yourself.”

I can’t believe Fig’s suggestion spell would have worked if head boss in charge fed lady hadn’t been there. Speaking of her, as soon as she showed up I knew they weren’t going to be able to shenanigan their way out of this one (which is literally the word Emily used, hilariously). I don’t think even a nat 20 would have gotten them very far. Remember last week when I said that I was sure there was going to be a prom finale but I was also pretty sure there was still a good chunk of time before prom? As soon as they got arrested and the feds showed up I was like, “Oh they are not getting out until prom for sure.”

Siobhan trying not to laugh while Emily tries a ridiculous plan that might have worked in a different episode honestly.

Ally trying to Pirates of the Carribean her way out of the jail cell.

The cops didn’t even take their stuff in a month!

“I’m glad this is in my head and no one else can hear things like this.”

I love how Fabian rolls his eyes at Adaine for thanking her spells but he always thanks the Hangman.

Realistically the Hangman would have told Fabian the plan before it happened but the way it played out was soooo good.

The return of Mr. Cubby!!!! I was hoping it would be him but man! It was still so awesome to see happen. I wonder if Brennan introduced that family specifically in case the group ever needed to be busted out of jail (a likely need).

“Laws are threats made by the dominant socioeconomic ethnic group of a given nation.”

“You guys wanna make some bacon?”

“That was on fire the whole time? You’re so brave!” Adaine likes adults who aren’t her parents so much.

Riz being like uhhhhh my mom works here.

“To the AV club!”/“It’s been months!”

OK so they took a palimpsest from Bill in this episode. That was there to tip them off that he’s up to something I’m sure, but I feel like that could also turn out to be a Chekov’s gun for next ep. I’m sure the ability to trap someone’s should would be useful in the finale.

S/O to Brennan for his excellent foreshadowing throughout the episode and honestly the whole series.

Siobhan thinking to check the trash folder of his computer was a good move, even if it didn’t end up being the right one.

OK, strap in guys. This is where things get WILD.

Siobhan’s “Oh shit!” when she got halfway down the page of Watches and Wards and then that Harry Potter sounding sting in the background.

(Before I get any further, I love that Adaine’s first thought was well that means my sister isn’t Kal Vaxis because she thinks her sister is the root of all evil).

But WOW. After all the trash talking of the old oracle, it turns out Adaine is the new eleven oracle! And she has been since EPISODE ONE. I almost thought she was gonna be *that* elven oracle because of the questions the cast was asking but nope. It is, as Zac and Siobhan put it, a The Santa Clause situation where the last one dies and someone else gets the job.

Brennan’s faint amusement as they work through that is so good.

You know what’s kinda hilarious in hindsight about that? I said before that, so far, every person Adaine has pegged as trash has ended up being trash of the highest order and an enemy of the party and of course she’s been good at predicting things! She’s the literal oracle.

Am I reading this wrong or is the Religious Studies teacher name Yolanda Badgood?

Also the sheet says “Lunchlad (Official Title)” RIP dude.

Emily low key thinking this is going to be about pay disparity between the races.

Will putting the book back retroactively get rid of anything bad currently cast in school?

Brennan going, “Nothing happens.”/“You see an upside down waste paper basket.” Is such a GM mood. I had a session once where I spent half an hour just saying, “You’re looking at the door,” in various ways.

No one knows what Goldenhoard’s name actually is and it’s the second to last episode.

I feel like Brennan must have gotten forehead/cheek kissed a lot as a child because he’s constantly having NPCs do it. 

Are elves in this setting actually immortal (barring being actually killed) or just long lived? Because Adaine talks like she’s immortal but I wasn’t sure. Anyway, newsflash Adaine. You’ve been mortal this whole campaign! Because apparently, the elven oracle always eventually dies. 

I love that Adaine finally confronted the oracle about sinking on a ship and actually ended up kinda sympathizing with her. I can’t believe this is how that running joke ends.

Fabian at the ghost of the past eleven oracle who’s imparting wisdom on Adaine: Who are you?

Ally: Can I do something weird? (Dude, when do you not?)

Ally mumbling through an inspiring spell as Murph clues in to the paperwork discrepancy that blows the plot twist wide open. And then miming the whole thing in the background as the scene goes on.

“He was mean so I thought that meant he was a good guy.” More stern than mean really but yeah! Same Murph!

You know how you know things are about to get real? When the DM starts letting you do stuff like bust down doors without even rolling for it because there are bigger fish to fry.

The 69 glyphs of binding. Nice.

But in seriousness, Kal Vaxis (apparently it’s spelled Kalvaxus but I can’t be bothered to change that in this post) was apparently trapped by Arthur and bound to work at Aguefort (as Goldenhoard) because…he’s a wildcard I guess. Sidenote, can you imagine what this season might have looked like if Arthur hadn’t died? Or was that always the plan for him to die in some way? Like to resurrect an NPC maybe if the crew hadn’t lost 2 party members.

Man when he said last ep that the girls were going back to school I thought OK that makes sense because it’s the AV computer that Biz used or maybe it’s Penelope. But I totally overlooked teachers.

OK so the binding spell specifically says “as long as I live” and Arthur is dead. So….what does that mean exactly? And this plan seems to have been in motion from before Arthur died. What does that mean? Also, if that wording means he’s freed when Arthur dies, what was Arthur thinking killing himself???? Did he need Kristen to sneak him into heaven so he could talk to Sol and do some scheming or something? AHHHHH I have so many questions.

Also in the binding is a clause about tea. Now, first of all, Arthur, bro. Come on. Second of all, a lawyer really should have looked at that. “I will drink anything you give me”? I work at a law firm. I’m a lowly first year but even I know that’s a terrible thing to put in a contract. I’m sure y'all non lawyers know that too!

Karam-Kajam (the binding spell words) kinda looks like “magic maker” backwards. That doesn’t mean anything. I just wanted y'all to know I was freeze framing every thing that might be a clue.

OK ok ok, so I’ve been saying for a while now (in posts but mainly over chat) that all this bad stuff must be like connected to a central person in service of a central goal but the players were probably all unconnected wild cards acting in self interest. The one thing I couldn’t quite put together was what because these plots have been mainly unconnected. But now, we have it! All the weird things starting a war (by manipulating the harvestmen), getting 7 maidens (by manipulating Biz), and reinstating prom king/queen (by manipulating (?) Penelope and Dayne, also yes! my wild card guess was that prom king/queen was going to be part of a spell or curse or something. Guess it was prophecy but yes! vindication!) are parts of a prophecy on how to bring back Kalvaxis! (Along with him getting his “glittering treasure”?)

But yeah! No wonder it was so hard to put the pieces together! They all connected but only through a prophecy. Good job Bren!

“The sun shall fall from the heavens” is part of the prophecy which makes me think Sol or Helios might be involved in this somehow.

Ally: There are definitely going to be 7 virgins at prom. (That deserved a rim shot).

Good on Murph for making sure none of them were on the virgin list bc that would have been a pain in the ass to find out mid-fight. Also, I KNEW “Where are their bodies” was the question to ask last ep when Biz said they were going back to their bodies.

“Who told you that? An oracle?”

I hope Adaine just uses her oracle status to make sick one liners like, “I predict this is gonna hurt,” before she witchbolts someone. She never does her actual job. 

Adaine who hates her family, righteously indignant: Between our houses and the world, you expect us to choose our houses?

The rest of the group who loves their family: BYEEEEE.

Well, no. Kristen also had reservations before she remembered her brothers existed.

Adaine texting her mom: You should probably leave.

Siobahn and Ally fistbumping over their mutual not caring about their parents.

OK so what’s up with the rat? What’s so important about the rat? And what’s up with Zayne? We still haven’t figured out what’s up with him.

Still not clear on if the crystals trap your physical body or just your spirit and leave your physical body dormant irl.

So that’s how they got rid of the adults for the fight. Nice job again Brennan.

As far as I can tell, Brennan made up this usage of the word palimpsest and I’d never heard of the word before and now I type it so much. Wild.

“I’m calling an Uber. You use the minute to go look at as much shit as you can. Jump in the Uber with me, come to my house. Look Rudolpho will be here in two minutes in a Honda Civic. Use one of those minutes. Go.”

A Knight to Remember. 

They freaking Chitty Chitty Bang Bang to Kristen’s house.

I love how Uber Drivers in this world are still gunning for 5 stars.

OK, time for the most stressful 30 minutes of Fantasy High (so far).

I think the wagering mechanic Brennan used for the fights was brilliant. For each conflict a d20 was rolled. 1-6=epic fail. 7-14=bad but not awful. 15-20=favorable outcome. The twist was that if the person chose to help their family they could give up half their HP and 14 spell levels and he would roll with advantage.

Everyone quickly took that deal except Adaine who truly does not give a damn about her family (and also, reasonably, thought that they wouldn’t even be at home. Idk why they apparently were tbh).

When Emily said, “She’s a complex person and she’s allowed to be,” that was the moment I was like, “Oh yeah. She’s not actually Fig. IRL she knows what’s happening.”

Siobhan uses her divination roll of 18 to save Kristen’s family without having to risk anything but the Ally turns around and decides to take the deal to try and save Adaine’s family WHEN ADAINE DOESN’T EVEN CARE. But it makes sense that Kristen would.

Lou’s monolog as Brennan rolls about how nerve wracking and terrible it is to have no idea what’s going on.

“This is the worst thing I’ve been a part of.”

“I was wondering why my mom visited me and humanized herself and this is exactly why.”

Lou/Fabian: What if my fucking family dies? (F O R E S H A D O W I N G, albeit unknowingly)

Brennan (sagely): It couldn’t have been any other way./Siobhan: It could’ve been!

lol at Adaine trying to trigger that ice cream later wish at their darkest moment (so far). Also, not that I think Brennan ever forgot about it but now I’m for sure it’s gonna come up next ep bc if nothing else that would have reminded him.

OK first up, Fig and her mom.

“Dang they’re already organized with costumes?”

That was so boss, her mom getting revived and then IMMEDIATELY shooting two guys w/ her bow.

Emily LEGIT crying through that scene. The whole room was on an emotional tightrope. You can tell.

Where in the mountains Sandra-Lynn!? I want specifics Sandra-Lynn!!

I love the idea of her jumping out of a window onto a dope griffin’s back. Fig’s mom just bought herself a bunch of spots on my grown-up rankings list.

Ally: THAT WAS NUMBER ONE

Me: SAME.

Next Riz at Strongtower

I knew Sklonda was going to be in the secret room!

I love that apparently Riz can recognize his mom’s gun by hearing it.

I know it was in the promo but Riz’s mom being like, “I was so scared you were gonna ask me to prom” was hysterical.

You just know Sklonda and Agent Angela have been fighting like cats and dogs this past month.

Riz and his mom high fiving. They have the best relationship.

Gorgug and the Thistlesprings

lol, looks like his parents had the easiest time wrecking their intruders.

But based on how it was described as compared to everyone else (bar Fabian–we’re getting there), it sounds like he got pretty dang hurt.

And I guess they have a tank (which they usually use to mow the lawn) and a bomb chest? Wild.

Anyway, if anything had happened to them insert Rosa B99 meme.

“You come to the tree, you better be ready to never fucking leave, you understand?” So boss. (Also, is that a pun?)

Gorgug’s parents launched a satellite while Gorgug was in jail.

Kristen and co.

Kristen’s dad (who is the worst): You think these guys were illegals, what?

Kristen: I’m gonna take the car, byeeee.

Kristen and Adaine bonding over their terrible parents.

I’m Concerned about Kristen’s brothers.

Abernants

They poofed out. Idk why they were still there to begin with.

So the damage they took was supposed to represent the danger the took in their respective fights. Kristen got Adaine’s divination roll meaning her family was fine either way but she did take damage for Adaine’s family. But the fight was already over by the time they got there. So, in story, any injuries sustained must have been from the fight at her house, even though that wasn’t technically the deal.

Anyway, Adaine doesn’t care about her family so let’s not waste any time moving onto

Seacaster manor

Geez

OK, you guys. Let me tell you my buildup to the realization that Bill had to die.

In the first set of episodes, when tone was established, I said to myself, a parent is going to die. I don’t know who, but someone will.

Then, Bill gave them a training montage and I thought, curse of the mentor. He’s going to die. Besides, he’s one of the biggest parental figures and he’s larger than life–perfect for a fall.

Then Sklonda took down the Harvestmen and I briefly shifted my worry to her.

But then Fabian started clashing with Bill. And I remembered all the constant talk of his mortality.

And then, this ep, Brennan made him choose between his mom and dad and I was pretty sure. (sidenote: Fabian yelling at his mom the same ep Adaine said he has a great relationship with his mom. But, like, compared to her, maybe. Also, mean Brennan.)

And then Fabian lost an eye (with a description that still makes me wince) and I KNEW. Once he lost his eye, there was no way Bill could leave the fight alive, thematically.

Honestly, it was a wrap when Fabian played the video from his dad. I was worried he’d die before he got there. 

(It was a low blow, and I credit you that.)

Why were there Harvestmen attacking Fabian’s house and no one elses?

Fabian’s mom just drinking while the house is being raided.

I was so sure the tuxed Harvestman who attacked Fabian was going to turn out to somehow be Daybreak or something. Anyway, it has to come up again. There’s no reason for that level of detail otherwise. And tux sounds like prom attire.

Lou rolls a nat 1 and then rerolls it because he has the lucky trait. What’s funny is just started listening to NADNDPod and Murph (who reminded Lou about the lucky thing) disallowed one of his players from rerolling a nat 1 even w/ the lucky in the last ep I listened to. I don’t remember if the circumstances were different though.

Bill handcuffing himself up to keep fighting. Yikes.

Anyway, ugh that whole death scene. I would write more but this is closing in on 4k words and I’ve been working on this for hours. I just wanna say, that was a perfect way to go out for him. Killing 60 people and then getting stabbed by his son and exploding. So baller (as was Fabian jumping out the window onto his bike and catching Bill’s sword. He has so many cool swords now).

It’s a crime no one does animatics for this show.

We also got a piece of the puzzle. Bill was the one supplying the palimpsests (or at least one of the ones. who was doing it before?) not for an evil reason. Just a chaotic neutral reason of wanting to recapture the glory days. So now we know that.

I mentioned this before but…Fabian is Thor.

“I SHALL LEAP INTO HELL AND KILL THE DEVIL HIMSELF” and Bill Seacaster is dril apparently.

I love Fabian destroying the nice thing Bill said about him to preserve his legacy.

Ally: HE COULD HAVE SURVIVED.

I appreciate so much that Lou knew his character so well that without any hesitation he stabbed Bill and that was the right choice.

Whew, that was a lot.

Also, not that I don’t trust Brennan but it’s wild that Bill, the most thematically appropriate parent to die, was the only one who failed his roll apparently. 

Aww at Zelda’s message to Gorgug. She made him a playlist! So 80’s high school. It gives him a bonus! Also I really wanna know what’s on the list. Like, is it all fantasy rock puns or actual songs? Yay for Brennan giving them cool items for good RPing. 

Live band. Nice.

Emily and Zac both rolled 20’s for initiative for next week’s fight. Hopefully that’s a good omen. We have no way of knowing because THERE’S NO PROMO FOR NEXT WEEK.

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

This isn’t edited. This is more than 4000 words. This is so long my computer is about to die. Thank you and goodnight. 

[blessuswithblogs]

Video Games are a God Damned Mess: Bad Business Practices, Unsustainability, and the Fidelity Plateau

(shoutouts to the anon rando in my inbox for telling me about the read more button you were kind of rude about it but i don’t use this website so i legit didn’t know)

The video game industry has always been a bit wild and wooly compared to its older contemporaries. The emergence of a new medium is always rife with upheaval as paradigms shift and people discover that the old rules don't necessarily apply all of the time. That said, the past three months have been filled with what I can really only describe as catastrophes for many disparate publishers and development studios.

 You may recall I talked a bit about this during my game of the year list and Fallout 76 analysis, but to recap: with Telltale shutting its doors and shafting its workers, the writing was on the wall for the same thing to happen again as the intrinsically unsustainable boom and bust cycle began the less glamorous stage. It turns out I was correct in my predictions but congratulating myself for seeing this coming is not unlike congratulating myself for accurately predicting that tomorrow will be Tuesday. Or. Whatever day it will be when I post this. fuck i dated the lp thread ruined LOOK the point is that this was really obviously going to happen and that nobody felt the need to prepare for it or try to stop it before 10% of Activision-Blizzard's workforce got canned is a major failure of the industry at large.

So let's talk a bit about what's happened since then. There's been a lot, so forgive me if I miss your favorite corporate implosion. First, at Blizzcon, Diablo Immortal was revealed to what actually might have been the most actively hostile reception of a game in history. This has less to do with the more financial aspects of the ongoing Videocon Crisis and more just kind of served as an ill omen and an example of Blizzard's worrying descent into... wherever it is they're going. If gross incompetence was a place, they would be descending into it. On paper, a Diablo mobile game is a money-printing proposition. When all is said and done Immortal will still probably make them gobs of cash. In practice, however, they fucked the landing so hard they probably lost potential sales. The kind of folks who go to Blizzcon and get omegahype for a new diablo game are not the kind of folks who play mobile games. Mobile games have a Stigma among the hardcore crowd, and also the Ethical Business Practices in Video Games crowd (which as of this writing appears to be me, Jim Sterling, and the Warframe devteam). For a lot of braindead gamerbros, mobile games are synonymous with things like Candy Crush and Peggle, which are perfectly fine games honestly but they're For Girls or some shit so mobile games are bad and for casuals. More pertinently, mobile games are also a ferocious jungle of microtransactions, pay2win mechanics, and generally shoddy design. Command and Conquer and Dungeon Keeper, beloved franchises that have been ripe for revisiting for years now, both found mobile games and they were both utterly terrible. These games make a great deal of their money by exploiting "whales", or in actual human being language, vulnerable people with disposable income and difficulties with impulse control or addictive personalities. Or kids who know their mom's creditcard number. Kids play video games. Now that we are no longer kids (theoretically, anyway) it can be easy to forget that. I'm not the pearl-clutching type, but I think that stigmatizing a genre of games that proudly touts an exploitative-of-children business model is probably okay.

So there are lots of reasons to be skeptical of Diablo Immortal right out of the gate, and quite frankly whoever thought that just pushing that out there with literally no other Diablo related news items (like any whispers of the long coveted hd remaster of diablo the second) was either transferred in from another company the day before or had some kind of unspeakable grudge against the scheduled presenters, to whom my heart goes out to. There is also some undeniable precedent that Blizzard-Activision will, in all likelihood, monetize the everloving daylights out of it. Both Hearthstone and Overwatch have more or less become nicely polished vehicles with which to deliver lootboxes to players for a nominal fee. If this hadn't been followed by a seemingly unceasing calvacade of disasters, the whole debacle would have been really funny to point and laugh at. It's still pretty funny to point and laugh at, but it also has some less amusing implications. Blizzard in particular has been up to a lot of no good lately. Let's talk a little bit about their recent one-two punch.

First up, we have the complete and sudden abandonment of competitive support for Heroes of the Storm. Heroes of the Storm was essentially Blizzard's seething regret and resentment for letting Valve snatch up the whole Defense of the Ancients thing put into code and unleashed upon an unwitting populace. It had actually been gaining some renewed interest over the past year or so due to the developers putting in some elbow grease and making the game both more accessible and just. More better. HotS has also had a modest but respectable eSports scene since the game's launch, with a variety of professional players, shoutcasters, tournament organizers and emergency bugfixers employed. Many of them were anxious about their jobs for months in advance with no word from the higher ups about who would still be employed by 2019. Sometimes, companies have to make difficult decisions and let people go to keep operating. Even my communist ass reluctantly accepts this as a reality of the system we live in. However, there is a protocol about this kind of thing. Giving notice. Giving, you know, severance pay. Stuff like that. And of course this presupposes that this sort of cut to the workforce is actually necessary in the first place. Given that AB subsequently reported record profits for the year of 2018, I have some doubts. Completely dropping support for a game out of the blue is a scummy thing to do to your playerbase. When it is also directly impacting the livelihood of hundreds of people in your employ, it goes beyond scummy and turns right into Unacceptable.

But "unacceptable" is Bobby Kotick's favorite word in the English language so while shoving hundred dollar bills from his latest corporate bonus up his butt he and his friends in the boardroom decided that the HotS esports people might get lonely, so they had better go and fire another 10% of the workforce too. Just because. Like literally just because. His company is doing fine - better than fine! They are at record levels of better than fine. But the shareholders demand more and more exponential growth, so to cut costs that really didn't need cutting, away goes 10%. Will game quality suffer because of this? Undoubtedly. More work being piled on fewer people who are also living in mortal fear of losing their jobs Just Because is not a recipe for success. People are mad about this, much like people were/are mad about Fallout 76 - players of games, industry wonks, and iconic voice actresses alike are no longer tolerating this kind of thing in Two Thousand and Nineteen, Common Era. Nor should they!

Elsewhere in the Game-o-sphere, similar developments are brewing. ArenaNet, the folks wot do Guildwars, went through another round of mass layoffs. EA's stocks have plummeted and Battlefield V "failed to meet expectations" because it only sold A Ton and not A Fuckin Shit Ton, and Anthem is not really lighting the world on fire. After Mass Effect Andromeda's... curious debut, Bioware has probably been feeling the heat and a lot of people are concerned that it too will suffer the ultimate fate of all studios acquired by Electronic Arts: joining Visceral Games in a broken heap at the bottom of the garbage chute. Bring back Dead Space you motherfuckers. Bethesda continues to, improbably, suffer through PR disaster after PR disaster with Fallout 76, a game that seemingly cannot stop fucking up. Ubisoft has received some positive attention for vowing to NOT lay off hundreds of employees for no discernible reason, which leads me to believe that our standards for praiseworthy behavior have dropped alarmingly low. Even 2K Games in all of its monolithic glory seems to be feeling a bit of a Stock Price Squeeze. Honestly by the time I get this done and posted it's entirely possible that somebody else will fuck something up. I'm still kind of waiting on the fallout from Randy Pitchford's porn thumbdrive, but I'm also a little bit pleased that Actual Money Crimes are getting more traction in the news cycle.

So, returning to the main point: the industry is in a bad situation of its own making. It's a scene that's almost always been defined by trend-chasing. For a while, that meant that we would just have to suffer through an endless glut of EXTREME SPORTS GAMES SPONSORED BY A DUDE or a barrage of samey console shooters desperately trying to be Halo every once in a while. Unfortunately, the trend-chasing now extends not only to the games themselves, but to the methods by which they are monetized. Ever since DLC became a mainstream thing, the brightest minds of the boardrooms have been working tirelessly to deduce which method of fleecing players will scientifically speaking get them the most money. Inevitably, when some enterprising little weasel develops a new and improved monetization scheme, the rest of the little weasels will immediately latch on to that scheme and that's how you end up with Battlefront 2's ridiculous lootbox grind and Shadow of War's ludicrous inclusion of randomized lootboxes in a singleplayer action-adventure game. While I'm certain that the platonic ideal of the lootbox has existed in some form or another for decades now, I think that we can squarely lay the blame for the Great Lootbox Plague of the Twenty-Tens at the feet of Valve.

Valve has been known for questionable business practices for a while now (albeit in a more lowkey way than We Fired 800 People So Bobby Kotick Could Buy a New Yacht), largely getting away with it because Steam has been more or less unchallenged as the premier digital distribution service for video games. This might be changing soon, as Epic Games is going straight for the jugular with a number of aggressive moves with its own fledgling platform, but historically, Valve has faced very few consequences for just kind of being petulantly antagonistic towards its userbase because said userbase is easily mollified by steam sales and Gaben memes. When people think lootboxes in 2019, they probably think of games like Overwatch or Battlefront 2 or basically any contemporary multiplayer game. I certainly do, but a bit of fact finding allowed me to remember that Valve has been doing this shit since Counterstrike and Team Fortress 2, and Dota 2's byzantine cosmetics market can't be overlooked either. All three of these games are or were at one point genre leaders and made Valve so much money they basically decided that they didn't really need to make games anymore. A reasonable conclusion to draw, given the fact all three of these games are inextricably linked to their history as very popular mods. Valve just outsources a great deal of its labor to dedicated, naive fans and gives them a pittance of the huge mounds of dollars they make from their hard work. It's a good racket, but it has set an alarmingly poor example to the rest of the gaming world.

Games as a service, in concept, is fine for games that lend themselves well to the idea. MMOs have been using a variation of the model for decades now and that genre is actually like, Perplexingly Healthy. Free to play games like League of Legends and Warframe have also had success with a service model. The problem comes from the AAA Game industry's pathological insistence on shoving square pegs into things that don't even have holes to begin with. Shadow of War, or Assassin's Creed, or any other major singleplayer offering, has no business whatsoever being a Live Service. They are finite experiences by design and that's completely fucking fine and normal. Appending microtransactions and lootboxes to them is a transparent attempt to just suck up a little bit more money from players in the most unsustainable way possible. Here is a small hint if some WB Games bigwig stumbles upon this: first of all, I'm building a guillotine, so you better watch your ass. Second, how dare you fucking make Shelob a sexy lady. Third, (this is the one that is probably most relevant): People are willing to pay as they go for cosmetics and timesavers for games that they like and want to support. I've dumped a lot of money into League over the years because there was a period of time where I was playing it nonstop and having a wonderful time for quite literally no cost to myself, so I felt like buying the cute Panda Annie Skin was a good compromise. Regrettably I would later learn that there are aspects of Riot Games I'm not super okay with giving money to but at the time they seemed agreeable and my friends who work there gotta get payed somehow. This whole dynamic of wanting to support a video game goes out the damn window when you are already charging a $60 entry fee, plus whatever highway robbery pricing you put on the inevitable DLC. In this case, the onus is squarely upon the publisher to provide an experience and content one would reasonably expect of the pricetag. Putting in microtransactions for cosmetics is galling. Putting in microtransactions for actual game progression, like in Battlefront 2 or Shadow of War, is outright insulting.

Many will leap to the defense of these publishers and developers, saying that these measures are necessary to make these ludicrously expensive and lavish AAA games that all look suspiciously like one another. For the time being, let's accept this as a true statement. If this is, in fact, the state of affairs in the industry, then the industry needs to change to a more sustainable business model. When playing Destiny 2, during a big space cutscene, the cute pilot lady ferrying me to The Large Molerat Man's Murderboat had beautifully rendered skin where you could see the pores and the little wispy cheek hairs that swayed to the momentum of the space plane's movements. It was very nice but then the next year or so I heard nothing but people pointing out "hey this game has no content you dipshits" or "the devteam is actually scamming people with the experience system to wring more playtime out of them". The cheek hairs affair succeeded in making me want the pilot to buy me dinner and regail me with stories of her space adventures as I batted my lashes at her in romantic admiration, but also: stop it. You do not need to do this. This is strictly unnecessary. The graphics arms race of yesteryear is over. Nobody cares anymore. Fidelity is plateauing harder and harder, to the point where games running properly on console without having to settle for 30FPS is becoming very difficult. There is an Earth B somewhere out there where Bloodborne was not a sony exclusive and got a PC release with 60FPS support and loading times for humans and on Earth B I am still playing that game for the forseeable future because it is the best game ever. We are far past the paradigm where we are making Tremendous Graphical Leaps with each successive generation. Right now, as of this writing, games look jawdroppingly good. Just ludicrously pretty and grandiose. Continuing to push the graphical envelope for Every Damn Annual Release is a waste of resources: monetary resources, labor resources, system resources. As of March, 2019, what people really want is stability and functionality. Something that runs nice and smooth at 60FPS and doesn't turn its characters randomly into nightmare inverse-Rayman beasts. I think the huge success of the Nintendo Switch, a console with relatively modest hardware but superb functionality, portability, and a surprisingly full featured library of both massive first party titles, like Breath of the Wild and Mario Odyssey (which honestly look better than a lot of games on more robust hardware because of wonderful art direction) and smaller indie games, is testament to this line of thinking.

Maybe that's too bold of a statement. Maybe there's this huge swath of the gaming public that is just clamoring for more cheek hairs. If there are I think they're fucking out of their minds but who am I to judge. As long as games like that werewolf game The Order exist, where the universal reaction is "this is so pretty!!! ...wait there's nothing in here." I think that there is a serious responsibility to push back against that because evidently it's bankrupting the game industry and forcing them to violate international gambling laws to stay afloat. Except it's fucking not, actually. Many publishers are claiming record profits, upward trends, and are in a spot to have the raw nerve to say "well this game that sold 7 million copies didn't sell 8 million copies so it failed to meet expectations". They are doing ludicrously well for themselves in terms of generating revenue from sales. Where these highly successful corporations are running into problems is satisfying the almighty Shareholders. Shareholders are sort of like. Imagine if you got a job where you had to keep a large committee of actual babies happy, except the babies don't know shit about fuck about anything and demand that you routinely break all reasonable laws of sustainability and keep bringing in exponentially higher profits or they will take their ball and go home. There is still, evidently, money enough to give newly hired executives million dollar signing bonuses, but when it comes to just making a game that doesn't fall back on exploiting people with gambling addictions, we're suddenly dealing with an outfit of noble, longsuffering churchmice just trying to make ends meet. People are rapidly getting fed up with this blatant hypocrisy and dishonesty. Sales from Hearthstone card packs alone could fund a robust HotS esports scene for eternity if properly apportioned. This money is not properly apportioned. It is thrown into a gigantic incinerator so Kotick can get high on the fumes.

You might be wondering what this girls' deal is with Blizzard. Surely there are more egregious offenders? Firstly, Blizzard is very relevant at the moment because they are one of the highest profile publishers to recently Do A Business Oopsie. Secondly, I live in Irvine, California. Blizzard HQ is a ten minute drive from where I live. It's a local company to me, and it's legitimately kind of hard to see it continue to go down this path because I've had friends and neighbors who have worked there and enthusiastically described the experience right up until the very moment they get canned for no reason. My alma mater, UC Irvine, is one of the leading schools in the nation on adopting eSports into their collegiate athlete program. I understand, to a lot of people, Electronic Sports (please support them) are a big joke silly thing, but to me and my family who work in the UC system, they're actually like a huge and pertinent part of professional life. I'm literally being consulted by my mom's co-workers for advice and insight on how to minimize the abusive and toxic behavior that has become synonymous with streaming and professional gaming because campus now has a huge eSports center with rows on rows of gaming computers for students to use. Games Are Big. They are a powerful cultural and economic force in the lives of millions of people and denying that because of "haha nerds" is the same shortsighted, utterly-lacking-in-self-awareness wanking that resulted in the stupendously destructive "its just the internet, it doesnt matter lol" attitude that has caused the world so much grief. That said Bart Simpson becoming an esports legend sponsored by Riot Games is still pretty lame don't @ me.

What it comes down to is this: the games industry has grown into a hugely influential and powerful institution that affects the lives of more and more people every day. However, the appropriate growth in regulation, oversight, and worker protection has not occurred and has honestly shrunk. People love to talk up Satoru Iwata because when the Wii U was floundering he took a massive pay cut and refused to lay off any staff, reasoning that "it will be very difficult for our teams to create software that will impress the world when they are constantly worrying about losing their jobs." It's a little incredible that The Baseline Reasonable Thing To Do has elicited such effusive praise, but that's the world we live in and Iwata-san was pretty alright so I'm okay with it. Both his conduct and reasoning are both solidly above reproach in this case: it is really hard to be creative when the Sword of Damocles is hanging over your head! That’s 500% true! This goes for game developers, community managers, eSports staff, support staff, literally every part of the process that matters, even the totally unrelated clerks and communications people who are still completely necessary for creating games. The only people who don't suffer are the dipshits on top who don't actually contribute to the creation of games in any way. They're still fine. Better than fine, really. That's why people are mad. That's why people SHOULD be mad. Don't stand for this anymore.

[dayeemah]

A b s e n c e

Pairing Kim Seokjin x reader

Featuring other members of Bts

Warning: Involves angst ! Fluff ! Smut ! And other things. Read at your own risk.

Word count 2k +

Genre: Romance; Angst and fluff

~ This was an inspiration from the beautiful @beautifulloser92.... Credit to her <3

Description: You thought your relationship was perfect and Jin was always going to be there for you and you would be there for him but when he goes on tour, your relationship falls apart and you can’t control it especially with hidden secrets.

You and Seokjin had been friends since before he became a trainee and part of a well known group called Bts. Your relationship seemed to be perfect, however, recently your relationship had been rough but you both managed to get through it. Tours and albums were coming out and Jin spent more time in the studio and on the road then with you. But you were patient with him and his career.

You woke up in the morning, three weeks after Seokjin had left for a two month tour. Sleeping in his big pink sweater had a small affect on you, yet you still missed him but it felt as if he was sleeping in the bed every night. You laid in the bed holding the stuffed teddy bear he brought you before he left making you reminisce about the moments you guys shared on Monday before he had to leave next week.

Monday ~

You woke up cuddled into your boyfriend Seokjin, he was still sleeping so you took this time to admire him. He loved it when you complimented him and the best part was you enjoyed making him feel good about himself.

“Wake up my handsome beautiful prince.” you smiled kissing his cheek.

“Your forgetting something.” Jin groaned, rubbing his eyes as he stared at you in awe.

“Oh i’m sorry.. My beautiful, world wide handsome prince.” you grinned which made him smile satisfied with your answer.

“Oh.” he smiled holding his heart. “you didn’t have to. But since you mentioned it. This beauty is natural no creams.”

You laughed hugging him tightly laying your head on his chest. You were being clingy since this was the last week you will get to be with each other until he has to go away for two months for tours and their Bon Voyage videos.

“Jagiya. I’m going to miss you but don’t you dare think just because we aren’t next to each other you don’t have to call me handsome.. because you do.” Jin pointed out giving you a look.

These small things made you adore him even more. You just nodded smiling staring at him in awe. He leaned down to kiss your forehead and then picked you up swiftly making you squeal as he carried you to the bathroom.

“Oppa.” you laughed, “What has gotten into you my handsome prince?”

He only smiled ruffling your hair handing you your toothbrush with toothpaste already on it.

You held the stuffed animal close to your chest smiling at the flashback you just had. The apartment felt empty without him and you couldn’t wait to have him back. You got up going to the bathroom brushing your teeth staring into the mirror. Your cheeks went red as you reminisced the thoughts of him fucking you on the sink.

Tuesdays adventures were wild and your held on to the sink closing your eyes to imagine every detail and savor every ounce of pleasure you felt that morning.

Tuesday~

“Oppa.” You blushed, as Jins lips began to kiss and suck down your neck creating light hickies.

Seokjins hand dived into your panties rubbing between your lower lips feeling your arousal build up. His soft lips met yours as you melted into him whimpering.Your hands reached up hold his broad delicious shoulders as Jin slid your panties and shorts off letting them fall on the floor. He parted your legs, letting one foot rest on the sink ledge.

Jin pulled you closer to the edge letting your other leg dangle as he sucked his finger before sliding it into your wet sex. You gasped softly biting your lip closing your eyes leaning your head back in awe as his fingers glided between your walls.

“Princess eyes on me.” Seokjin warned, lifting your chin up to look at him as you opened your eyes.

He added a second finger pumping them in your sex at a fast pace, his long slim fingers filling you up so perfectly as you moaned holding his waist tightly. 

“J-Jin.” You whimpered, your nails digging into his skin as he groaned from the feeling.

You gasped cumming on his fingers your thighs shaking steadily. Seokjin smiled satisfied with your body’s reaction then pulling out his fingers from your dripping sex, he sucked them clean giving you an intense stare that made your core heat up again.

“So yummy, now Oppa wants to fill you up... do you want that?” your boyfriend asked, the bulge in his pants very noticeable.

He dropped his pants watching your reaction as you nodded wrapping your hands around his cock, drooling from the sight. You loved how thick and long he was, and whenever he filled you up you enjoy the feeling of his cock pounding deep into your sex.

“Y-yes I want you Oppa.”

Jin nodded taking his shirt off as he reached for your breast massaging them as he slowly eased into your wet sex groaning. You gasped again, holding on to the sink with one hand and holding onto his ass for support. Jin began thrusting into you slowly allowing you to feel all of him. His hard thrusts nearly making you fall off the sink.

You were moaning leaning your head back against the mirror, your breast bouncing up and down against his chest, as he sped up his movements. He pulled out lifting one of your legs on his shoulder as he slid in deeper making you gasp, holding on tightly once more.

Exceptionally close to climaxing, your eyes rolled into your head. With every thrust Jin gave you, made you feel absolute pleasure. The way his thick cock filled you up had you in heaven. Moaning louder, your body shaking as you came on his cock in awe.

It had to be minutes later that he soon filled you up groaning. His brown locks sticking to his forehead as he pulled out leaning down to kiss you sloppily but barely enough to satisfy your lonely lips.

You were finished washing up for the morning when you noticed your stomach tightened and you felt uneasy. You took a deep breath hoping to go drink some water when you found yourself vomiting in the toilet. Your eyes wide as you held your stomach in pain.

After cleaning your face and mouth you wiped the sweat that lingered on your forehead. You continued with your day, doing grocery shopping and making lunch. Thats when you felt the feeling that you felt earlier, uneasiness and sickness. You took a deep breath going to the bathroom only to vomit once more. You knew in your mind maybe you weren’t sick and you were scared to take a home pregnancy test.

You didn’t know what to expect and it scared you. Kids was something that you and Seokjin talked about but just never had time to plan, busy with tours, albums and practice. Then you were busy with work and sometimes wouldn’t get back home till after midnight.

However, the thought of you carrying a life excited you in a strange way. You weren’t objective to kids you just never thought you could or would be a mother so soon.

You turned the t.v on, ironically it was a commercial advertising pampers but showed a pregnant lady and the movement the baby made inside her stomach. You smiled softly your hand rubbing your stomach thinking about what if that was you. You were thinking about picking out baby clothes with your boyfriend and his friends, you even thought about naming the baby and getting to see him or her for the first time.

You tapped your foot against the tiles in the kitchen, waiting for the 5 minutes to be up. You were waiting for the results, not sure if you were going to be relieved or disappointed. You looked down at the test your eyes widened, almost passing out from the two positive test on the counter.

“Oh my god.”

You took a few minutes to let the good news sank in before freaking out a little. Talking to yourself, contemplating if you should call your boyfriend or not to tell him you were pregnant. You were nervous but quite excited to share the news, finally you and Jin had made something beautiful together. 

You texted him telling him you guys needed to talk and when you checked your messages a few hours later you realized he hadn’t replied.

Thinking he was busy you decided to just ring him later on, you weren’t sure what time it was wherever he was and took no responce as a sign he couldn’t talk right now so you left it alone for the rest of the day.

The next few days you blew your friends off to stay home and miss your boyfriend all day. You haven’t heard from him in a while and you didn’t want to get him in trouble or disturb him if he was truly busy so you waited a while longer. A few hours later, you began getting impatient so you dialed his number putting the phone to your ear. Biting your lip nervously as you listened to the phone ring in your ear.

‘Hi you have reached a world wide handsome man, Kim Seokjin, sorry I can’t answer you. Now please leave a message or don’t.. Have a good day. But of course you won’t because you don’t have -

‘Jungkook I swear to god if you don’t put down my damn headphones’ (Yoongi)

‘Can you all shut up I’m trying to record a voicemail... I swear to god I won’t cook any food for either one of you brats for a week’

You groaned rolling your eyes sending another text then began to take a long shower hoping when you come back you’ll see a message from him.

Except there was none.

Disappointment written all over your face. A whole week had passed and you gave up, contacting one of the managers that Hoseok had referred you to if you couldn’t reach them..

You: Hello? Um this is Y/n... Is Jin available ?

Manager: Why? Jin is getting his make up done. Can I help you?

You: Its important... hes not replying to my messages or calls and I-.

Manager: Im sorry. If Jin isn’t answering his cell. I cannot allow him to speak to you, this isn’t my rules... If its that important you can speak to the manager... 

You: Please its really important. Just a few minutes.

Manager: Okay just a few minutes then.. Seokjin the phone is for you..

Jin: Hello? Jin speaking..

You: Jin... i need to tell you something important...

Jin: Are you okay?

You: Yes But we need to talk... 

Jin: Um yeah.. listen I sent you a message but I don’t know if you got it or not.. But yeah 

You: No... did you get mine?

Jin: Yeah I did.. I just haven’t had the time to reply.. But I was hoping you’ll understand.. I want us to break up..

You: What? Jin why? I’m-

Jin: I have to go y/n.. take care..

*Line disconnected*

You weren’t sure what to feel or do. In this moment you were truly frozen and shocked. You never knew you could break up with some one without letting them know why. You stared at your phone finally feeling the water works which soaked your thighs and phone as you covered your face crying. 

How could he do this to you? All those years you stood by him and supported him and he just tosses you to the side and has you looking crazy. You felt bad for yourself, now you were a single mother and refusing to tell your friends because they’ll probably think of you as pathetic now.

Days later you cried yourself to sleep sulking in ice cream and Gogigui until you ran out of food and didn’t bother to go shopping. Your hair was messy and your eyes were red and puffy. You just didn’t have the energy to do anything anymore so with the money Jin and the other members had left you, you scheduled a flight to Australia.

You knew you had to go somewhere he would never run into you at and Australia was the first placed that popped into your head.

And Australia was the start of a new life.

A/N: The start of a new series. I know I'm a bit rusty but I’ve been working on this for a while and depending on how well this fic does, I might rewrite it. So enjoy. Let me know what you think.