#but my writing feels bleh rn

[greasydumbfuck]

also just for the record. no matter how much utterly stupid shit i say or draw about him, frank actually makes me so deeply sad. this old man should be picking up his grandkids but he cant. i think about him too much and im so sad

[tmnt-on-the-mind]

raph!! :)

[taegularities]

hi hi. uhm small thing regarding cmi. if you're a reader, do lmk what you think please 🤍

[quatregats]

Honestly the worst part of all of this is that I'm going straight to India tomorrow night, which is a lose-lose situation because (1) I know that I'm not going to have any time to rest if I'm going from being sleep-deprived from finals and being sleep-deprived from traveling with a 10 1/2 hour time difference and also basically being in transit for like 5 days straight, making me really not feel motivated to put in the extra push and get these essays over with, and (2) I really wanted this India visit to be a good trip, like I want to take pictures of my family house and brush up on Malayalam and just in general go in with intentionality and get the most out of it, because it's the first time I'm going back in >10 years and also it might well be the last time I get to go to Kerala (at least in a family capacity), but everything is shaking up for this to be a fever dream in which I am mostly just miserable and sleep deprived and if I'm lucky I'll come out of it remembering anything at all. Like I don't even have the post-finals hit of relief that you're done, and even worse, I don't even get a good trip to India. Plus on top of that I'm missing Christmas at home entirely, which is really not helping.

[alphacrone]

it’s very discouraging to be feeling burnt out after not doing very much

[lunarheslwt]

How dare Louis sing "the friends we make, the love it takes, it's worth the pain" as if it doesn't make me want to sit down and breakdown at the sheer poetry, emotion, and sentiment to it. How dare he. Because he's RIGHT. It's what makes the world go round. It reminds me of the 'with freedom, flowers, books and the moon, who could not be perfectly happy?' quote by Oscar Wilde.

It really is about the little things and human experiences.

[mooodyblue]

i don't want to open up requests but i want to write but i don't know what to write and its like i forgot how to have a single thought about anything 🧍🏼

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[buckymcbuckbarnes]

What is it with nightshift break rooms and being so fucking awkward with the silences, like all I hear is munching and slurping and I swear to god I will winter soldier these people if they don't stop.

How am I supposed to read fanfiction WITH GOOD OL BORIS ON THE OTHER END OF THE ROOM SLURPING HIS SANDWICH HUH?!?!

All I wanna do is curl up in bed and read bucky x reader is that so hard to ask. Why must we slave away under capitalism. I wanna be a silly little goose doing silly goose things.

[laughinglynx]

.

[blurglesmurfklaine]

I will not be annoying on main I will not be annoying on main I will NOT be annoyi—

[ouiouimochi]

happy super belated birthday to bbgurl abyss ( I deffo didn't just learn it and decided to write rn-)

I've had this prompt in my brain for a while so at least hey it's gonna be out now

warnings: a bit long (would need part 2), not fully proofread, and poopy writing. a bit messy. not everything I put in here is canon compliant since there's a lot of things I'm unsure of, like if he was born into only a normal commoner household or what— for the sake of plot, he's from a noble family

apologies in advance since it's been a very long while since I last wrote anything past prompts

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

synopsis : you met abyss at a masquerade ball after a small stunt you pulled and basically dragged him into it. so you promise to make it up to him the next time you meet

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

• abyss was wondering why his parents decided to drag him to a masquerade ball for high society all of a sudden when they don't even treat him as normal person at all

• they reasoned that they have to keep up with appearances of being a harmonious family even after how they treated him all this time

• they also strictly instructed— more of commanded— that he never take his mask of in fear that people would judge and criticize their family

• so here he was, in a completely unfamiliar environment

• despite being surrounded by people who wore masks like himself, he felt out of place

• not belonging in the event, never in society

• that's why he's alone in the peaceful back garden of the venue, basking under the blanket of stars as the bustle can be faintly heard in the background

• the boy walks around near the balcony of where the ballroom was, hoping to witness a semblance of lost belonging from hearing and observing the event from a distance

• clicking of heels quickly approached the end of the balcony overlooking the garden

• “my lady, please cooperate just this once!!” a panicked and exhausted voice of an adult exclaimed from the further side of the terrace from abyss

• “bleh!”

• it happened so fast that abyss barely reacted in time

• he never expected that the owner of the heeled footsteps earlier would recklessly jump down from the balcony

• while the girl was mid air, the two made eye contact— well it was obvious they were looking at each other even with their masks on

Surprise was evident on both of your countenances— your and abyss’ masks doing nothing to hide it. You actually had a spell prepared to smoothen your landing but you really didn't expect your escape route to have a person, so you kind of just forgot about the spell. Before both of you knew it, you directly flew— well landed on the poor boy as he barely managed to at least catch you before you both can get seriously hurt.

However, due to the abruptness, Abyss loses balance and you both land on the floor as the boy groans in pain.

“My lady!!!!” The same voice from earlier cries as footsteps quickly approached the railings of the balcony.

You panicked a bit at that and swiftly pulled the blue haired boy into the thick shrubbery

Abyss was a bit startled, almost releasing a yelp but you immediately covered his mouth up just in time. Right above where you two were hidden, your attendant cries to herself— muttering something about being dead meat if your father finds out.

Then the sounds of hurried footsteps faded away from your earshot, your attendant leaving to search for you, opting for a safer route.

You let a few seconds pass by before allowing yourself to conclude that the coast was clear. Releasing the unknowingly tight grip you had on the poor light blue haired boy’s mouth.

You breathe out a sigh of relief. Feeling a sense of accomplishment from a successful(?) escape once again.

You face the unsuspecting victim of your little stunt, quickly making an observation. He was quite tall and lean with long, light-blue hair pulled up into a high ponytail. Your eyes then quickly scan his face and immediately mentally comment on how pretty he is. He also seemed to be around your age.

He looked stunned— understandably so. Who in their right mind would jump off the second floor balcony just like that and pull a random bystander to hide with them?

Apparently, you would. Maybe not even in the right mind.

You laugh a bit, finding the situation a bit funny in the moment. You did feel bad for accidentally dragging him into your shenanigans though.

Picking up the fallen objects on the ground before standing up, you then offer the boy a hand which he wordlessly accepts as he stands up as well. Both of you dust yourselves off.

You were running out of time, so you also had to make the interaction quick.

You belatedly introduce yourself like how nobility would as he returned the greeting with his own name as well— albeit barely managing to stammer it out.

“Abyss, huh? I'd really want to apologize for dragging you into this since I only acted on impulse. You must have been surprised.”

Surprise was a huge understatement, to say the least, but Abyss nodded. It was the best he could do, having no experience interacting with people other than his parents, much less a girl.

You bring out a pocket watch and bit your lip upon checking the time. You really had to leave if you wanted to catch up to the auction being held nearby.

You look at Abyss, “I'd like to apologize once again, but I really have to leave. I promise to make it up to the next time we meet.”

You quickly hand him his mask that you picked up earlier from the ground then pulled out a cloak seemingly from nowhere. You then summoned a portal big enough for yourself from the ground.

You turn back to the light-blue haired boy as you put the cloak on, “‘til next time, pretty boy!” before jumping into the portal you made. It disappeared the moment the top of your hood got inside.

Meanwhile, the silence and isolation might've been serving Abyss better than earlier as he was completely red in the face.

First, he was angry at himself for having his ugly feature be seen by a noble lady due to him not noticing that his mask fell off. Then next, she hurries in leaving and complimented him— making him embarrassed. Lastly, he realises it's the first time someone directly saw his cursed Evil Eye and not even as much as bat an eye or comment on it.

He went through multiple emotions in such a short while that he was having whiplash.

Abyss didn't hate the experience at all. If anything, he might've been holding on to the hope that they'd meet someday and he can have someone who'll treat him like a normal person.

He stared at the mask in his hands before looking up at the sky, wanting for his hope and wish to come true even if it would take a while. He'd be willing to wait for that moment to come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 2 - Part 3

[popquizhot-shot]

Hi feel free to ignore this I've just found your Dad Miguel O'Hara x reader stuff and I love it so much and I saw you comparing them to Dracula and Mavis and it just so happens I'm also obsessed with the hotel transylvania movies rn so I was wondering if you could write something on that?

OMG SUFHIUGBLAWIUBG YES I'D LOVE TO

-yk how drac has all these friends who are all protective of mavis as well right?

-yeah thats jess and peter b (if im being honest peter gives such murray energy sometimes) and jess gives wayne energy.

-the overprotectiveness, the frustration all of that YES FUCKING-

-okay, imma be coherent rn.

-mig is very protective. he's not losing another daughter, especially when you're on a mission, the way drac lowkey stalked mavis in the first movie when she went to the fake town, yeah thats mig. but here he has live of you on missions.

-obviously when you get injured he's all mama hen and fussing over you, scolding you gently.

-ykw what i think about often? for your birthday, miguel literally somehow creates an exact replica of your childhood bedroom.

-you make the cute little eyes and cry

-THE BLEH BLEH BLEH THING

"MIGUEL!"

"Yeah, Peter?" he look at you and Peter, who is holding Mayday

"Mayday said her first word!"

"HUH??"

Mayday stares at him, giggles and says, "Bleh bleh bleh.""

-Mig doesn't talk to you until you coax him with food

i have an exam tm so im so srry my thoughts are all over the place :"D tysm for this it made my day

[johnslittlespoon]

also little (ok not so little. at all) personal thing as a way of mass–apologizing in advance to friends/moots for being slow with replies/not super interactive for a bit (possibly? always hard to predict) but pls god feel free to ignore this <3

i hate talking ab not–fun personal stuff on here (if it's not hidden deep in tags LOL), but i feel so so guilty for being so slow at replying to messages here/on discord and i would never want any friends to feel ignored or like i'm not enthusiastic to chat bc i genuinely have the most fun yapping together in the wota server and it's been such a joy making more friends here and getting closer with some ppl 🥺 it's just eating me up even tho ik i don't have to apologize/explain myself and i'd never hold it against someone else if the roles were flipped!! it's just to put my mind at ease so i can feel less guilt/pressure :')) and i am Uncomfortable talking about bleh emotions so it's easier to just plop it here and not have to explain myself one on one lmaoo tbf i may delete this in a few hrs bc just typing this up might give my brain some relief anyway and then i won't feel like this is necessary!

but sam lore the quick of it is i have # bipolar and i've been in an originally manic, then hypomanic episode essentially since around the time i started this account? it's the longest 'up' episode i've had but it's also the first one i've been off bp meds for so that might be why (long story dw i see my dr monthly <3 sorting life out rn) and i think starting stimulants back in may prolonged it a bit bc yk. meth LMAO but it finally petered off a few weeks ago and now i am entering the Big D (and not the fun kind) so some days i just do not have any energy for anything other than survival mode and when i'm suddenly super chatty or active, 99% of the time it's bc i just took my adhd meds and downed an iced coffee lmaoo genuinely so grateful i have those meds to keep me from fully sinking deep into a bad episode for now at least. so tldr; not trying to be antisocial or ignore anyone, just tryina truck thru :-)

i'm so thankful for all the cool ass friends i've met thru mota and i have been rly scared since i felt myself swinging to the other side of the bp spectrum last month bc i've been very up since i joined tumblr and i don't want a sudden change in vibes to be taken personally or for it to seem like i've lost interest in fandom!! i also get scared i'll just be dull and boring to friends now who have only known me while i'm manic which is understandable bc it's a big switch up but i think over text it shouldn't be as jarring bc yk i have time to think ab my words more and all. i am a little surprised actually that if anything, my motivation for writing has only intensified in the past month, but i think it's the first time i've had a healthy form of escapism in an episode and my brain has definitely latched onto it to get me thru that and a lot of shit stuff that's been happening irl this summer, so i'm unbelievably thankful that this fandom dragged me back into fic writing as hard as it did <3

but as sometimes happens with depression as i'm sure most of us have experienced, motivation/energy loss can hit even our biggest passions and i'm Terrified and hoping so very hard that it doesn't, but if fic updates do abruptly slow down as i ride this episode out, that's likely the reason. can't see myself losing interest in mota anytime soon but ik that if someone's usual writing pace suddenly slows down, ppl often jump to that conclusion (myself included lol) and i just want to make it clear i will Not be abandoning my fics and as of now, i'm still plowing ahead on all of them. AND THAT'S ALL FR BACK TO MY GOOGLE DOCS fuck do i think this is a journal?? jesus christ my bad

[not-a-space-alien]

K&J x MMSS 4: Valen & Jim Part 12

Part twelve of the fourth crossover with @whumpsday!

Call me a silverware drawer the way I have all these spoons for writing rn

K&J masterlist

MMSS masterlist

K&J x MMSS crossover masterlist

To be added to the taglist, contact @whumpsday

Warnings: Aftermath of torture

In this chapter:

Valen checks what time it is when they wake up.  Close to morning, and sunrise.   He slips back into bed and plants light kisses up Jim's neck.  "Good morning, sleepy peepy."

Jim jolts almost violently at the feeling of a mouth on his neck, then relaxes when he realizes it's just Valen.

"Shit. Sorry." He's been able to enjoy neck kisses from Valen for the last couple years without issue, but he's been extra jumpy lately with Kane's return. He kisses Valen on the cheek. "Just got a little startled." He's definitely not a sleepy peepy anymore.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking."  He runs his fingers through Jim's hair.  "How's your hangover?"

"Bleh. I've had worse, though." He snuggles against Valen. "You're going tonight?"

"Yes, I missed my window to go last night, but we should be fine to wait.  What about you, are you still going to the shops?"

"Yeah, I am." Jim's stomach turns at the thought of being left alone with Kane again, even with their positions reversed. His fingers brush over the side of Valen's neck. "Just, just make sure you come back okay. Like always."

"I will.  I'll go straight there and come right back."  He stretches and yawns.  "Kane is locked in the basement if you'd like to check in on him.  Want me to start breakfast for you?"  Valen occasionally tries to cook human food, and he enjoys doing it, and it inevitably comes out tasting very weird each time.  He's not as bad at cooking as he is at driving, but it's close.

Jim likes Valen's weird cooking even when it sucks. It's the thought that counts. He's sometimes better than Liz, though that's not saying much. And besides, interacting with Kane without Valen always there is something he'll have to get used to if they're living together again.

"Yeah, thanks, that'd be great. Surprise me." Jim gives Valen a kiss before getting out of bed to let Kane up.

Valen goes to the kitchen and starts making an omelet.  He cracks a few eggs into the pan, but then can't quite remember what all goes in an omelet.  Try as he might, no matter how many times he watches Jim cook, he just can't remember which ingredients go together.  Cooking seems to require an innate sense of human taste that he just does not have.  He would have thought that just through sheer rote memorization he would have been able to do it, and yet...

He puts in a bell pepper (stem and seeds and all), some cheese, and some bacon in with the eggs.  He's fairly certain about those ones, as well as garlic and black pepper, which seem to go on everything.  He then gets some bread, before remembering the bread just gets heated up and served on the side of eggs, not in them.  He pops two slices in the microwave.  What else?  Pickles and condiments go on sandwiches sometimes, so he throws the pickles in the pan, folds the omelet closed, and then squirts ketchup and mustard on top before putting it on a plate.  He then takes the bread out of the microwave, which is at this point slightly soggy and limp and steaming, and puts it next to the eggs.  There, it has protein, carbohydrates, fiber.  That seems like a good mix.  He puts an orange on the plate as well, then sets it on the kitchen table.  "All right, Jim, you can come eat when you're ready!"

Jim comes up with Kane shuffling behind. Kane's starting to get a little less scared: while he's still having trouble wrapping his mind around the idea that Jim wouldn't want revenge, he hasn't been hurt so far, and Valen seems willing to protect him. Kane also looks a lot better, hardly a sign of injury left on him. He smiles at Valen when he sees him, sitting at the kitchen table. "Good morning."

Jim sits too, examining the omelet. He takes a bite. It's interesting, weird but not that bad. "Thanks, I love it."

Valen beams, clapping his hands.  "Wonderful, I'm so glad.  Kane, you look well this morning.  Have you ever cooked human food before?  It's one of the trickier things I've done.  I would have thought my background in the sciences would aid me, but it appears relatively useless."

"Oh god." Jim comments. He does not think Kane would do very well at it.

"I haven't. You made that? And it's good?" Kane asks. He would like to feed Jim. It feels... appropriate. "Can I learn?"

"Well, I can't speak for Jim, but I can show you how I do it.  Which is probably not exactly correct, but appears close enough."  His eyes flick over to Jim as the human bites into a piece of omelet that has bell pepper stem in it.  "It's probably about as passable as human food as the blood I make is as passable as blood."  He smirks.  "Given the right equipment, I can manufacture substandard yet sufficient meals for either a human or vampire.  I should be featured on some sort of cooking program!"

Jim laughs through his mouthful. "That would be amazing. You're so right." He spits the stem out like an olive pit. "Kane, you could use a cookbook before you start experimenting, if you really wanna learn. Prolly best to get the basics down first."  Jim finishes his omelet and orange happily, and his bread with a little less enthusiasm.

"Alright. Kane, I'm gonna grab you some clothes, a toothbrush, basic stuff. Anything specific you need?" Jim asks.

"No, that's, that's great. Thank you."

"Okay, later." Jim gives Valen a kiss on the cheek before heading out.  Before Jim leaves, Valen pulls him aside and politely tells him that although Kane loathes to ask for anything out of fear, Valen has noticed that he seems to prefer long-sleeves and long pants, to cover his skin up.

Once they’re finally alone, Kane tentatively asks, "You're really... together? With a human?"

Valen smiles at the question, blushing.  "Yes, I am.  Most vampires already consider me a sexual deviant, so I figure, might as well go all in."

"Huh." The concept is still a little odd to Kane, though not as odd as he supposes it should seem. "I suppose there's a little hope for us all, then. If a vampire and a human can fall in love."

Valen smiles so, so wide.  That's such a romantic notion, and Valen didn't even have to say it himself and then be embarrassed about it.  "I suppose so.  Have you ever fallen in love?"

"No, I'm not the romantic type." It's better this way. No one would ever possibly like him back, he'd only experience heartbreak if he were to fall in love with someone. "What's it like?"

Valen's eyes go distant, his expression warm, his mind fuzzy and elsewhere.  "It feels warm.  It's difficult to describe without resorting to meaningless fluffy metaphors, but it feels like someone is finally on your side.  Like you've discovered something rare and precious and all you can think about is how to keep it safe for as long as you can, and how lucky you are that the stars aligned in such a way that you get to enjoy a little corner of life that you've made for a while, in the huge vastness of the cosmos.  It's on your mind all the time, like a worry, but it makes you feel better instead of worse."

"It sounds beautiful. I'm glad you've found that with him. As long as you can." Kane says softly. Valen has to be aware of humans' short lifespans. He's probably thought about it a lot. There is no spending your life together with a human. He's a ticking time bomb to heartbreak. Jim has to be, what, a third of the way through his life? More? He can't help but pity Valen.

Valen nods.  "Yes, for however long it lasts.  I'm quite reminded of how heartbroken I was when my first cat died.  It will surely be painful in the end, but that doesn't make the happiness and love we share while we have it worth less.  I'm sure love is not so rare that Jim is the only person I can experience it with, nor me with him.'

"Yes, I'm sure." Kane decides to change the bleak subject, picking absentmindedly at the padding on his cuffs. "You're going to vampire territory tonight?"  He's glad there will be more blood available, but nervous to be away from Valen's protection.

"Yes, I'm planning on going straight there and back. I'm going to advise Jim to simply keep you in the basement unbothered until I return, as I think that will be safest for all of us."

"Yes, that, that sounds good." Kane can't fuck up if he's just left alone. In his wonderful blanket nest in the nice, sunless basement. His new favorite place on earth.

Valen can just go home, back to vampire territory, anytime he wants. It's strange to be captive in the presence of a free vampire.

Jim comes home with a week's worth of clothes, all long sleeves and pants that Kane can use to cover himself, and a few other basic items. Kane is overwhelmed by the gift, clutching the bag to his chest.

It's so nice here. If Kane could live like this forever, he could be happy, captive or not. He's fed and unhurt. That's all he needs.

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I know it's still... undecided, what the two of you would like to do with me. Um, I would do anything to stay here. Anything. Please."

Valen looks unsurely to Jim. "Well," he says hesitantly. "I don't think Jim has plans to send you away or anything.  We're not going to let you go, on account of the risk, no matter how small....and we're certainly not going to give you back to those dreadful hunters. I'd count myself lucky if none of us ever saw them again."

Kane is immensely relieved by Valen's words. He looks to Jim for confirmation.

"Yeah. You're staying. And no matter what, never going back there."

Kane puts his face in his hands. "Thank you. I don't know how I could ever repay you."

"Just keep bein' nice is all." Jim says.

"What they did to you was wrong," Valen says firmly. "To be clear. It would have been wrong no matter who you were. Under no circumstances would it be right to leave you there, knowing what they were doing to you. Even if you weren't 'nice.' It's nice of you to want to 'repay' us, but it's just basic decency. Same as how I had to save Jim, when he was out alone and vulnerable."

"Exactly. Even if you started being a shithead again, we wouldn't send you back there." Jim agrees.

Kane doesn't really get it. He did deserve it, didn't he? They're just kind enough to save him anyway.

"Yes. Decency." he agrees.  Maybe he'll understand one day.

***

@barebarb

@cc1010foxy

@emcscared-whumps

@gt-daboss

@hurtpluscomfort

@jakersdaboss

@lolrpop

@melancholy-in-the-morning

@pigeonwhumps

@secretwhumplair

@some-thrilling-heroics

@starfields08000

@t0rture-me

@thecyrulik

@thejinglingcourtjester

@vehan-tikkun-olam-and-stuff

@whuarri

@whump-cravings

@whump-my-heart-away

@whumpycries

@wolfeyedwitch

@whump-addict

@why-not-ask-me-a-better-question

[foreverisntenough]

Can I vent for a moment… as a fic writer but also just as a girlie?

Ngl… starting to get a little discouraged by engagement on my works. I’m considering maybe just like wrapping or like just idk it’s a weird feeling. This is 100% not intended to be sympathy seeking but more so an inquiry... I just don’t know if I should keep on writing if it’s not being read if that makes sense?

Is this common for fic writers?

Are ‘You’re Mine’ and ‘Ours’ just not the vibe? I’m trying to figure out what to do.

I didn’t start this blog with the soul purpose of driving engagement. I write because I like to and because I am in love with a footballer but engagement or just any interaction at all with my work helps me know someone has actually read it, liked it or possibly didn’t! but any of it makes me want to keep writing otherwise I feel like I’m just kind of wasting energy, putting thousands of words out there I’ve put so much passion into that aren’t even being looked at. I’m definitely not above admitting that the work might not deserve engagement either just feeling disheartened.

I’m getting a little bummed out more and more each chapter I post because of the decline. To see the drop off makes it feel a little like it all wasn’t good ( which again, I’m able to realize that the writing or plot might not be all that great and that’s fine I’m just trying to understand ) I really try hard to put so much love behind these works and hours and hours of my time so I’m just having a hard time figuring out what to do here.

To anyone that had or does message or like, comment etc I really and genuinely appreciate it every single one. Please know this post is not meant to disrespect or disregard any of the lovely support or comments you’ve ever given to me. Insecurity is getting the better of me rn but every time I get a message it literally makes me day honest. This decline though has me feeling a little bleh.

Again want to be clear this is not a ‘boo hoo me’ I just don’t know what to do and I’m a long winded way I’m asking!

Also, sorry for the long rant I’m just relatively new to the fic game I only started a few months ago and I’m trying to figure it out.