the-shredded-cheese-wizard

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

uhhh sorry guys cringe moment 🧑‍🤝‍🧑

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

2 Fallout 2 Dashboard: Fallout New Vegas Dashboard Simulator 2

💥fat-woman

one jalapeño pepper would probably kill a pre war child tbh

🧟‍♀️ ghoulerthanyou

They used to televise executions of Canadian resistance fighters and serve radioactive Nuka Cola to pre-war children. I think they’d be ok.

💥fat-woman

no offense but how would you even know

🧟‍♀️ ghoulerthanyou

I was there.

💀 smoothskin-bullshit

Jalapeños existed before the war?

240 notes

#ghoulblr

🛑crimson-caravan-official

honestly that new reprogrammed protectron at the atomic wrangler can get it… like what that drill do bby

🛑crimson-caravan-official

WRONG BLOG WRONG BLOG FUCK I DIDNT MEAN TO PUT IT HERE FUCK

🛑crimson-caravan-official

GUYS STOP REBLOGGING THIS IM GONNA GET FIRED

4939 notes

🏜️mojavepolls

🤠bigirononhisdick

65 notes

🃏lucky-69

GUYS HOLY FUCK SOMEONE JUST SHOT PRESIDENT KIMBALL

🌵barrelcactusfruity

WAIT OMG WHAT?!

🌵barrelcactusfruity

what do you MEAN they just got his ear?

18 notes

🎲kingofswing

TWO THIRDS JUNK FOOD ONE THIRD CLOUD

MIXED IN TIN, NO GLASS ALLOWED

GOES DOWN HARSH, ITS JUST NOT GOOD

MAKES YOU FEEL YOU’RE MADE OF WOOD

🎲kingofswing

SIERRA MADRE MARTINI IT MAKES YOU STRONG

BUT DRINKING IT FEELS VERY WRONG

8 notes

💀 smoothskin-bullshit

When you’re a ghoul and you want to select a different option on the poll but you’re forced to choose the “I’m bald” option every time 😔💔

10 notes

⚙️steel-ur-girl

lmao check it out i absolutely bashed this lakelurk’s head in earlier. i love punching things :D

🏛️crapitu-petat-LXIX

A woman has no place in battle. Their sole duties are to provide progeny and support the home front while we fight on the front lines. Women are not, and will never be, as strong or as dominant as men, and anyone who encourages this perversion of nature is a degenerate.

⚙️steel-ur-girl

hey buddy your likes are public

1940 notes

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

💀 reliable down-to-earth-nerd-deactivated

This table in artifact storage is kinda bonkers actually

👁️ jonathon-sims-official

OP any updates?

👁️ jonathon-sims-official

OP?!

🔎 therealsasha

Still here, new account lol! Turned out to be nothing

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

Fallout New Vegas Dashboard Simulator:

🐄 brahmingirl-dick

it’s nothing that a nap and a fresh apple and a super stimpak and a box of fancy lads snack cakes and 10 beers and a nuka cola and some dirty water and a trip to gommorah and some jet and a cazador sting and killing myself can’t fix

2077 notes

🤠prospect-deez-nuts

just found this cool new container near clark field while prospecting! i’m gonna open it up and update you guys on what’s inside!

🤠prospect-deez-nuts

hoptal

5 notes

👨‍⚕️followeroftheapocalypse

Bored at work again and my courier friend won’t stop taking photos of me on her Codac R9000.

🌈confirmed-bachelor

i think i hauve radiation poisoning

23 notes

🃏lucky-69

honestly if you think the NCR is going to do any good for the wasteland if they win at hoover dam unfollow me right now.

🐻thebearbitesback

No. Just no.

Anyone who says that President Kimball is just as bad as Mr. House or Caesar isn’t paying attention. If you don’t vote for President Kimball, then you’re giving your vote to Caesar, plain and simple. I hope when you’re all enslaved or murdered you can find solace in your “moral purity.”

Vote NCR no matter where you are!

🃏lucky-69

girl i’m a freeside local 😭 i couldn’t vote even if i wanted to

🐻thebearbitesback

Of-fucking-course you’re from Freeside. No wonder your town is a warzone, people like you have no initiative to do anything about your situation and just mope around instead. Bunch of junkie degenerates.

🏛️ crepitu-petat-LXIX

All of you are degenerates. I can’t wait to watch as your filthy cities fall and all you profligates are hung from crosses or enslaved as you deserve.

🤖securitron-38392919

HO&T SINGLES LO4OKING TO #%FUCK NASTY xSEE PUSSY CL$$Ick NOW

♣️bigirononhisdick

anyone in this thread huff jet

2281 notes

🏜️wastelandwandering

everybody’s a big, tough wastelander until i ask for someone to come to quarry junction with me then all of a sudden it’s “the last guy who went got torn in half” and “deathclaw eggs aren’t even worth that many caps” 🙄

🦂deathclaw-fucker

i would go with you!

🏜️wastelandwandering

…no thank you

13 notes

🌵barrelcactusfruity

“cannabalism as a metaphor for love is trite and overdone” ok but do you even understand what it means. to me.

🌵barrelcactusfruity

hello???

🌵barrelcactusfruity

oh my god

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

🧝eldritch-blarst Follow

you're a mage but are you normal about invocations? do you support pacts? can you have a normal conversation with a warlock without bringing up Faust?

🧙 flarning-sphere Follow

nepo baby

🧝 eldritch-blarst Follow

this is exactly what I'm talking about this is the kind of harassment warlocks deal with EVERY DAY. you're not any better just because you went to college

🧝 eldritch-blarst Follow

reblog this version you cowards

🧌 doctor-glump Follow

doctor glump

🧝 eldritch-blarst Follow

typical fighter trying to make a post about a VERY serious issue into a joke

🧑‍🌾 bugbearhugemeat Follow

was anybody gonna tell me op was arrested for sacrificing a satyr in a blood ritual or was I supposed to find that out myself

🧙 flarning-sphere Follow

she WHAT

🧟 gabaghee-gabaghoul Follow

god forbid women do anything

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

types of guns rated by their names

machine gun- 0/10. all guns are

shotgun- 0/10. all guns do

revolver- 10/10 fuck it sure is

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

One time when I was a kid I had to leave a zombie survival forum because it became all too clear that I was the only one there for whom the zombie apocalypse was a fun hypothetical thought exercise and not a very real imminent apocalypse, like, people there were in the process of actually purchasing bunkers. I think of this because recently on discord I saw a man throw a straight-up tantrum because his idea to use caltrops on zombies wasn’t being taken seriously

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

can i make a confession

i love voyager

it's my favorite star trek ship

it's perfect, to me

it's sleek, it's pretty, it's got that pointed shape that makes it feel like it cuts through space

i love that you can see exactly where the bridge and the cafeteria are (they're the bump on top and the window on the front above the logo) i love that the shuttle bay is visible from the back

I love that the deflector looks like a smiley face

i love that the warp nacelles bend upwards into a v shape when the ship goes to warp

i love voyager. it's perfect. to me

i was watching that lower decks episode where to go to voyager and i couldn't stop geeking out about it.

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

whats the most masc way to drink a strawberry frappe i posited this question to a group of trans ppl yesterday and they said to mix it until the whipped cream dissolved and to chug without the straw

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

hey dude check out this new strain. it's called duckweed. it floats on or just below the surface of still or slow-moving bodies of water and wetlands

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

I WAS SEARCHING FOR A SU CLIP BUT THIS IS SO MUCH MORE FUNNIER THAN WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

Fag strong together. Don’t forget.

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

I beg my kidnappers for a phone, swearing not to make any calls or texts, and they stare over my shoulder, holding a gun to my head as I use my newly-freed hand to post, "So do like, dudes just buy ropes and baklavas from the same store or what lmfao like a specialty Crime Store"

One of the kidnappers says "balaclavas" but it's muffled under the fabric. I ask them to repeat and they do, their voice raspy from disuse. "You wrote baklava, that's a pastry." The other kidnapper goes "stfu" and then after a pause goes "Why would you buy from a crime store"

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

I TRIED TO CONVERT A NON-FUNCTIONING VIDEO IN VEGAS AND IT FUCKED UP

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

Working on a dataset of roadkill reports. state agency personnel CANNOT spell

[the-shredded-cheese-wizard]

an actual guide to british slang for foreign marauders writers.

because i am sick of seeing

a) people using american english eg. mom, sneakers

b) people overusing "mate" and "innit"

alright? = a greeting, like hello.

everyday words

ain't = haven't

scran = food, or to describe eating

swear down = promise

"swear down, I didn't do nothing,"

bloody = can be used in any sentence at any time

"bloody hell" "its bloody pissing it down out there" "i was bloody wankered"

bloke = a man

innit = isn't it?

mate = equivalent of calling someone bro

bruv, lad, my son = bro, dude, etc

fags, rollies, ciggies, (NOT A SPLIFF) = cigarettes

trust = trust me

"trust, ill tell you later"

chatting (what you chatting about?) = what are you on about?

quid = pound

proper buzzing = really excited

good

sound = good

bangin' = really good

lush = good

"that scran was lush"

jokes = a laugh, funny

bare = a lot of

fit = physically attractive

"he's well fit, isn't he?"

pissed = drunk

dodgy/dodge = questionable

bad

are you taking the piss? = are you having a laugh?

thats peak = thats bad

not being funny, but... = no offense but...

gordon bennett! = surprise, shock, disbelief

slag off = talk badly about someone

"she was slagging her off to anyone who'd listen"

minging, rank = disgusting

bloody nora = expression of surprise, irritation

bollocks = nonsense, something bad

"stop talking bollocks, mate"

skint = broke

prat, git = an idiot

insults

a melt = a pathetic person

clapped = ugly

"he's fucking clapped..."

sket = a promiscuous woman

slag = ^^

minger = an unattractive person

plonker = calling someone silly, not offensive

"don't be a plonker..."

cunt = VERY OFFENSIVE!

wanker, tosser = a general insult

bender, poof = a gay man, used insultingly