the-multiverse-and-me - Tumblr blog

[the-multiverse-and-me]

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Will they ever find out who is this mysterious biker?

[the-multiverse-and-me]

It's funny when Tumblr screenshots circulate other websites or you show one to someone who's not super online and they think they're supposed to pay attention to the usernames as a part of it so they get really hung up on the fact that a comment comes from a handle like "SloppyMuppetBalls" or "werewolf-smegma-collector." No not that part. That's the normal part. Don't laugh at our dear friend ClownHoleSlurper I'm trying to show you their insightful takes on economics

[the-multiverse-and-me]

I'm curious. Reblog this if you know how to cook

I don’t even care if it’s macaroni, ramen or those little bowls you stick in the microwave. Please, I need reassurance that most of the population on tumblr WOULDN’T STARVE TO DEATH if their parents couldn’t fix them food or they couldn’t go out to eat. 

[the-multiverse-and-me]

I’m actually obsessed with this person. more cis (“cis”) people should be doing this who gaf

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Two corndogs are better than one ~

Inspired by the Q&A livestream.

Become a member of my Patreon to get extra goodies not shared here.

[the-multiverse-and-me]

[the-multiverse-and-me]

“our teeth and ambitions are bared” is a zeugma

and it’s a zeugma where one of the words is literal and one is metaphorical which is the BEST KIND

[the-multiverse-and-me]

we do need to revisit the wording of "you can't have your cake and eat it too" because i don't think it clearly enough conveys that it's more that you can't simultaneously retain a cake and also get to consume it (which would render you cakeless). for years i was like But why not....it's my cake....?

[the-multiverse-and-me]

I see this disconnect between east and west coast a lot in people who hike with dogs, too. When I mention that hikes around me aren't dog friendly, not by rules but by terrain, there tends to be a mixture of confusion and disbelief.

Some of the trails near me are so rough that you have to choose between using shoes and helping your dog, as they'll be sliding constantly on steep rocks without using their nails for grip, or NOT using shoes, in which case most dogs end up shredding their paws and in a significant amount of pain. Every year, despite warnings and signs, rescue teams will have to go help half a dozen or so hiking parties who got halfway through a trail, only to realize that not only was their dog badly injured and unable to walk, but that they were not strong enough to carry the dog out safely. Most of the dogs aren't in bad shape, either.

hiking trails on the west coast: Begin climbing on a soft earthen trail through beautiful douglas fir-western hemlock forest for 2.5 miles along a series of switchbacks, then break from the tree cover for 1 mile of straight even trail through a stunning wildflower meadow just below the ridgeline, after which the trail makes a sharp right and continues to the summit with a further 2 miles of switchbacks. Enjoy beautiful views of the nearest dormant stratovolcano and also at least two waterfalls and a crystal-clear alpine lake along the way. Round trip: 11 miles, 3,000ft elevation gain. Difficulty: moderate :)

hiking trails on the east coast: Go 1.5 miles up. Yes, straight up. Switchbacks? What are you, a baby? Are you a little child? Fuck you. Go up. [Seasonal note: first half of trail is a running stream during mud season and a multipitch ice climbing route during winter.] Round trip: 3 miles, 1,200ft elevation gain. Difficulty: jesus christ

[the-multiverse-and-me]

you: suck my dick me, an intellectual: inhale my richard

[the-multiverse-and-me]

*Chanting* Wizard lizard! Wizard lizard! Wizard lizard!

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Concept: Depressing dystopian factory where everything is gray and samey and the workers are called by their employee numbers by an ominous deep voice.

But it's a really great place to work with high salaries, excellent benefits, and a flexible working schedule with plenty of paid leave. They just like the dystopian aesthetic.

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Parts of the country where self-service gas pumping is illegal.

[the-multiverse-and-me]

As someone who has actually studied the English language there's a common phrase about English that kinda annoys me because while it makes for a funny haha line it's such a gross oversimplification that it actually ceases to be funny. It's the one that goes "The English language is just three languages stacked on top of each other wearing a trenchcoat" or something to that effect.

I'm not going to go into detail as to why that sentence is inaccurate, just take my word for it as a person with a master's in English. I suggest we withdraw this expression from usage and replace it with the much more accurate "The English language is a dirty little slut that loves it when other languages cum big loads in it"

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Had a dream that tumblr came up with a new creature called Greachur and it looked like this

[the-multiverse-and-me]

Had a dream that tumblr came up with a new creature called Greachur and it looked like this