#you learn to move on and its all fine dandy

[albaake]

So...lil update on this eh heh. Imma be a little blunt, no one really participated, which I should preference that it's okay! I'm not upset about it at all! I tried something, but things didn't go as plan, it happens ^^;; . Doing art for a good bit made me learn not to take things to heart and that it doesn't reflect you as an artist

At the end of the day, I still really like this piece, so it wasn't a fail, in my opinion! So here's what I'm gonna do:

Instead of a raffle, anyone who participates, I'll draw a small colored doodle. It'll be a lil thank you for taking part in a silly idea that didn't exact pan out lol. There won't be definitive deadline so don't feel pressure!

Anyways, that's the update! Have a good night ya'll!

THANK YOU FOR 1k (Insta) and 1.5k (Tumblr)!!

I said I was gonna post this on the 1st but I finished it earlier than expected and hey it fits the spooky season~ (It's the 1st somewhere in the world so let's go with that lol). I thought it would make the most sense the subject of my first DTIYS would be my boi Crowne being the guy that he is~

Those who participate will be put into a raffle for a free full-body illustration drawn by me! The deadline will be till the end of November so no stress about time!

I kinda went a little ham on this piece unintentionally so no pressure to draw exactly, just do what the most comfortable ^^

I'll have the clip, psd, and lineart file of the BG that you can use if re-drawing the BG is too intimidating! Link to files here!

[lxvvie]

Phillip Graves who's obsessed with you.

You caught his eye long before you even knew who he was.

There's something about you, darlin', something that draws him in and he wants to know more. While he's bidding his time, he'll gather all the intel he needs.

Thank god for Shadow Company. His boys are the best at what they do and it's nothing to reward 'em for a job well done. Everything about you, from what you had for dinner last night up to your favorite coffee blend is his for the keeping.

Graves makes it a point to learn your mannerisms, too. He takes notice of the way your nose slightly scrunches and your eyes flick to the right when you're thinking about what to say next to your friend you met for drinks at one of the local bars. He drinks in the way your middle and index finger run over your lips as you contemplate which drink you're trying to order at your favorite coffee shop. You'd never know he did it, either. Thank goodness for plain clothes and baseball caps, eh, darlin'?

But when Graves does make his presence known, he does so in small doses. Your favorite bakery? Oh, what a coincidence, darlin'. They make good sourdough bread. You favorite deli? Oh, darlin', have you had their chicken club sandwich before? The bar you're at? Him and the boys come here all the time to decompress, sweetheart. Their craft beer is fuckin' amazing, too. It's enough to keep your suspicions to a minimum if they even exist. To you, he's just the friendly, well-meaning resident with similar tastes.

And then he finds out you're dating, or, well, you're trying your hand at dating. Same friend you met for drinks was playing matchmaker. The boys did their homework. Your date was a simple fellow, accountant or human resources or some shit, white collar kid with the looks but not the self-esteem to go with them. Regular hobbies not worth mentioning. A boring sumbitch if Graves ever saw one. He's not bad. He's not good for you, either, darlin'. Not like Graves himself is.

And when the time comes, you'd be left wondering what the hell happened. Knowing you, you were dressed to the nines, ready to chow down on some good food, and... he bailed on you. A short text. Nothing more, nothing less. Everything was probably just fine and dandy a couple hours ago. Phillip counts on it, and he thanks his lucky stars that he predicted correctly as he sees you at your favorite dive, nursing the craft beer he recommended. And he makes his move.

By his estimation, it's been about 30 to 45 minutes since he came and sat next to you and helped make your would-be date seem like a bad, faraway memory. Graves has you embroiled in conversation, has you laughing, replacing what would've been a boring ass date with his charm and wit, and before you know it, Graves drops the coup de grâce on your love life. "A bit starving here, darlin'. How about we grab a bite on me?" And shit, you couldn't turn that down. Not when he turned what would've been a bad night on its head. You beamed, accepted without hesitation, and off you two went. For a boring bastard, the kid's got good taste in food.

And when Graves sees the poor bastard again, he'll thank him. For stepping aside, for the dinner reservations, y'know, a friendly conversation between men. And as for his boys, well, Graves figures a bonus is due. After all, he got his. Why not spread his joy around?

[aethersea]

I've always wanted to learn bookbinding, ever since I was a wee little nerd, but there are a lot of things I've always wanted to learn, and this one has both a daunting upfront materials cost and a daunting upfront research cost. however, my sister is a jewel among siblings and gave me for christmas last year a handy dandy bookbinding manual, a block of good paper, and a little bag of tools.

but I still didn't have a suitable workspace, nor any of the many important tools and materials that she didn't include in her gift. so I just read the manual and pined. until maybe a month ago I got fed up with pining, flattened a cardboard box for a cutting mat, and went to town.

and I'm real proud of myself, so here's me rambling, plus photos!

I went to the thrift store and got glue + some fabric to bind the cover, went to Michaels for a paintbrush (and later went back for a metal ruler lmao it's amazing how useful it is to have a straightedge for cutting the paper), and...could not find material for the cover boards. so I went home and pined some more. but the urges were too strong, so after a couple hours of moping I got a stack of printer paper at the grocery store (I could not bring myself to use the good paper for my first, inevitably weak attempts, I just couldn't do it) and started making a little booklet. which was a great idea, it turned out, since it makes for good practice with cutting the paper, measuring things, punching holes in the signatures, etc.

I have a big box of greeting cards from Michaels, which I used for the covers. it didn't feel like I was making a Real Book, so I got some colored paper from the stationery store and used that for end papers.

so fancy~

galvanized by this success, I ordered a stack of chipboard online to use for cover boards; and once I was confident that I could cut paper without making it look too stupid (getting that straightedge ruler sure helped lol), I made signatures out of the good paper, left them under some heavy books overnight since I don't have a book press, and then punched holes in them! (huzzah for this nice video on getting the holes right)

my sister's gift included good linen thread. it's unwaxed, but after some poking around on r/bookbinding it looks like that just means I'll have to be more careful to avoid tangles and keep good tension. I am fine with this. I can be extra attentive. (I considered just running it over a beeswax candle, but one commenter said if your wax has paraffin in it, it could melt in a hot car, ruining the spine. I can't guarantee my candle is 100% beeswax, I didn't make it, so maybe we just move on.)

I don't have good linen fabric to use for the tapes, but the important part there is that the fabric be thin, sturdy, and not stretchy. the probably-cotton I got from the thrift store fits the bill, so it'll do!

this is a french link stitch, which I got from this exceedingly good tutorial. apparently it's strong enough on its own that for a book of this size, I don't actually need tapes, but I'd already cut the things so eh here we are. and tapes plus french link will make it a stronger binding still (according to a friendly redditor on r/bookbinding), so we carry on.

specifically we carry on to the gluing step. now as I mentioned, I do not have a book press, and you....kinda need one for this step. you need to hold the book block in place with the signatures facing upwards, pressed together hard enough that the glue won't run down between them and stick the pages together (though you do want the glue to get between them just a little, just for like a 16th of an inch). you at least need some clamps and a couple boards to sandwich the book block with.

but you know what? I'm not a professional, this is my first ever book, if it's a little bit off it'll be fine. so we grab all the heaviest books off the bookshelf and improvise.

it's fine! I'm sure it's fine! and just in case it's not, I've tucked a bit of cardboard underneath to catch any glue that drips down so it won't land on the floor. see? I'm prepared! I'm acing this.

and actually, it really was fine. I used clear elmer's glue, applied with a flat paintbrush from the art supplies aisle at Michael's, and frankly I liked the way the flat paintbrush let me slip glue in between the signatures. I did poke around on a couple bookbinding sites to see what kind of glue I should use, and the gist is that although there are better options than this, elmer's glue is perfectly serviceable, and the main downside is it's not archival grade. but I don't need my first bookbinding attempts to last 200 years, that's fine.

the next step is to add the mull. mull is a specific type of fabric – extremely loose-weave linen – and the idea is to paste it down over the spine to essentially hold the tapes and signatures all in place in relation to each other.

but I don't have mull! so I'm using more of the thrift store probably-cotton, because it's thin enough and not really stretchy at all. I'm sure this will be fine too. I painted a layer of glue onto the spine, then left it to dry a bit while I measured and cut the fabric, then painted a generous stripe of glue down the center, where it'll affix onto the spine. then I added a bit more glue to the spine, just to be sure, and pressed the mull into place, rubbing it thoroughly to make sure it's firmly affixed to every signature, with no creases in the fabric or air bubbles beneath it.

honestly I might have overdone it on the glue. I've never done this before, I don't know! I think it's okay, though – I tried not to ever let it become a thick layer, just a slight coating, since the danger of too much glue is that it might crack once dry and weaken the spine.

and now we leave it in the press overnight to dry, and pick up the next step in the morning!

[moonstruckme]

obsessed with the idea of driving lessons with Steve or Eddie<3 in Stevie’s car orrr in Eddie’s van! reader being a terrible driver and steve or eddie being to nice to call it out :’)

Thanks for requesting!

Eddie Munson x fem!reader ♡ 1k words

You think you’d feel a bit better if Eddie didn’t keep squeezing his eyes shut. He’d been the one to make the call that you were ready for the highway, promising you a million times that it’d be fine despite your apprehension, but as soon as you’d gotten on the entrance ramp his confidence had seemed to flee him—which isn’t ideal, because he was the only one of you that had any to begin with. 

“Eddie.” Your voice pitches, knuckles white on the steering wheel. “The car behind me is getting really close.” 

“He’ll go around us,” your boyfriend says without opening his eyes. He takes a breath, cracks an eyelid. “You’ve got it, you’re good. We’re all good. Everything is fine and dandy.” 

You wonder how much of this is for you. 

You stay there for a while, eyes volleying between your mirrors and the speedometer, until you come upon a car in front of you that can’t be going more than forty. You take your foot off the gas, coasting down to its speed.  

“Go around him,” Eddie instructs.

You glance into the next lane, just as a car whooshes past your window. “I can’t,” you say, voice going high. 

“You can do it,” he says, though his hand curls around the handlebar above his window. “Just look for an opening, speed up, and change lanes.” 

You take a few quick breaths before pushing down on the gas, head whipping around to check your blind spot before you signal and move over. Another car tries to switch lanes at the same time, blaring their horn at you, and you shriek and swerve back into your lane, slamming on the brakes to avoid rear-ending the slow car in front of you. 

“Jesus Hendrix Christ,” Eddie hisses. Then, with more pep, “Doing great, baby!” 

“I can’t do this!” 

“You don’t really have a choice at this point!” 

“What?” 

“I mean, yeah you can!” Your boyfriend’s nearly wheezing, head on a swivel as he keeps track of the cars around you. “You’re doing awesome.”

“I almost hit someone!” you remind him, voice starting to waver as panicked tears clog your throat. 

“Not your fault.” His hand wraps around your thigh, squeezing so the cool metal of his rings bites into your skin. “He didn’t see you either, he was just being a dick about it. You acted fast, which—which is the best thing you could’ve done.” 

Your lip wobbles. “Are you sure?” 

“I’m sure as shit, baby. Take a breath, okay? Panicking makes you a bad driver.” 

“Pretty sure I already am a bad driver,” you say, but do your best to fill your lungs anyway. 

“Nah, you’re the best I know.” Eddie’s hand rubs your thigh soothingly, at odds with the tension in his voice. “Not including myself, obviously. But it’s fine, you’re learning.” 

You want desperately to take his hand but can’t risk taking one off the wheel. You glance in your rear view mirror, watching cars go around you and the clunker barely trudging along in front of you. 

You chew your lip. “Can we be done? I want to get off.” 

You think you hear a relieved sigh. “Sure, if that’s what you want,” he says. “Take this next exit.” 

Eddie talks you through decelerating back onto the frontage road, helping you change lanes until you start to slow down in the shoulder. 

“Don’t pull over here,” he tells you. “There’s a parking lot just after this light.” 

You shake your head. “Nope, I’m done. I’m pulling over.” 

“But you can’t just—wait, you’ve gotta—” Eddie grimaces as the car tilts, one wheel going up onto the curb. “Okay. Okay, good job.” 

“Fuck.” You heave a sigh and move the gearshift while your boyfriend bends to kiss the dashboard, murmuring apologies to his van. “I think I need to start driving in something else, Eds. This van is too hard to learn in.” 

“Hey, don’t talk about her like that.” He caresses the dashboard lovingly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, you were…you had a learning experience. Plus, once you can drive her, you can drive anything.” 

“I don’t know.” You lift your foot from the brake, moving to hug your knee to your chest. “I think maybe—” 

“Shit,” Eddie says as the van starts to roll backward. “Shit, shit, baby, the gearshift!” 

You gasp, setting your foot back on the brake so Eddie can shift the van into park. 

“Oh my god.” You drop your head into your hands, breathing heavily. “I can’t even park!” 

“It’s—” Eddie’s voice is high, but he clears his throat. “It’s okay, that could happen to anyone. Reverse is, like, right next to park, so…it’s an easy mistake, I guess.” 

“I don’t want to drive anymore,” you groan. 

“Hey,” he says. “Hey, come here.” 

He reaches over and starts to grab for you, but you stop him, lifting your foot from the brake hesitantly. Eddie does you the courtesy of not making fun of you, and when the van doesn’t move you clamber into his lap, setting your chin on his shoulder while his big palms rove your back. 

“You’re not so bad,” he says, hair tickling your face as he tilts his head to accommodate you. “It just takes practice. Same for everybody. You want to be able to drive yourself around someday, right?” 

You make a noncommittal sound. “Maybe you can just take me wherever I need to go.” 

Eddie laughs, hand sliding down your back to pinch your waist. “I’m not available for a cab service at the moment, sweet thing.” 

“Mean.” 

“You like it when I’m mean to you,” he reminds you. 

You wonder if he can feel your cheek heating against his neck. “Only sometimes.” 

He huffs amusedly. Wraps a hand around either side of your rib cage, easing you back until he can see you. “You’ll get there,” he says. “We’ve just gotta keep practicing.” 

You gnaw on your lip, exhaling through your nose. “Yeah, okay. But can we stay on the ground for now? I don’t think I’m ready for the highway.” 

The humor saps from Eddie’s expression. “Yeah,” he agrees, “no more highways for a while.”

[finalgwen]

I'm going to go on a little ramble about representation in Doctor Who because tonight they managed to make me feel a way I haven't felt since 18 June 2005.

So let's start there, with the last time we got to see the Doctor and a male character have a romantic kiss. On family tv in 2005, with kids across the country watching. Two years before that, it was literally illegal to mention LGBTQ+ people in a positive sense in UK schools. Section 28's shadow lingered for a long time, I don't think there was any palpable change to the curriculum in those two years. But RTD gave us Captain Jack and that kiss, and he did so explicitly for the purpose of representation, saying 'It’s time you introduce bisexuals properly into mainstream television'.

Then after that kiss, Jack dies. Tale as old as time for queer characters. But then... He doesn't. He comes back to life, and refuses to die from that point on. A writer that saw too many brilliant gay and bi men disappear from his life (as It's A Sin brings into stark contrast) gave us a queer hero whose power was that he couldn't die, and I still marvel at the power of that.

(... And then sadly the elephant in the room, John Barrowman refused to learn about what's appropriate on set and kept doubling down on why his behaviour was actually just fine and dandy, and so we'll likely never see the character again, which sucks given how much he meant to bi kids growing up in that era.)

So anyway, Doctor Who moves on as it always does. We get Torchwood and a gloriously bi team there, but safely away in the adult television space. RTD era Who keeps on mentioning queer characters but we never get anyone quite as in your face or central to the plot as Jack. River Song briefly mentions flirting with everyone in the same 51st century way, but then stays mostly focused on the Doctor on screen.

Then Moffat era Who comes about and Season 5 doesn't feature a single queer character except River's reappearance. Even Moffat realised how much he'd fucked up here and course corrected. So things get slightly better with Vastra and Jenny (two prominent lesbian characters, only one of whom gets non-consensually kissed by the very male Doctor, yay) and eventually Clara, a canonically bi companion. It's only mentioned in little side snippets about kissing Jane Austen in unseen stories, but it's there? You can't deny she's bi, even if it never really informs her story. And then Bill, who's actually genuinely handled pretty well as a lesbian character, I think Moffat tried and things like getting a gay date interrupted by the pope are genuinely funny gags. Wish we got more of an actual dynamic between her and Heather though.

Then we get the Chibnall era and we do get queer characters here and there, The Witchfinders casting of Alan Cumming as James I is very good, and Praxeus has a quite sweet central gay relationship. But then there's Yaz.

See, Yaz is in love with the Doctor, apparently anyway, it's never mentioned before Revolution Of The Daleks when they became aware of the fan headcanon, and after using Jack to point to the similiarities between them in his last appearance, they kinda kept it on the backburner after that, so it's all very hastily resolved in one conversation in Legend Of The Sea Devils and they never kiss or get to display much affection.

So really we've had two eras where the main character representation has been piecemeal, there's certainly stuff there for queer fans to cling onto, in the same way that we've torn apart the classic era for hints of gayness. But Nyssa and Tegan weren't really for us, and neither is most of this. Even at its best it feels like straight writers realising it's a thing they should include but without any real passion for it.

And along comes Rogue and we get a full fledged romance, a dashing hero stepping into the Doctor's world and them instantly clicking and flirting, the chemistry palpable, all leading to a heartbreaking conclusion where they actually get to kiss before the end, and the chance of more to come in the future. No little one liner where Rogue says 'I like guys btw but anyway moving onto the important stuff'. No nods and winks and jokes about long tongues. Actual text, more development in an episode than Yaz and the Doctor managed across an entire run.

The writers of this episode are Kate Herron and Briony Redman who used to work on Loki, the one with the one side conversation about bisexuality that's a nice nod but never really builds to anything, that RTD famously called a 'craven, feeble gesture'. So they came in without the shackles of the MCU and did it right, and I love them for it. They tried to give us what representation they could, and with a producer that wants the same, we got something authentic.

Authenticity matters when it comes to representation, it can't just be to tick a box, and it really feels like this was for us. Something that might lead to the same brain explosion in a queer kid watching Doctor Who that Parting Of The Ways did in 2005 for me.

[cels-not-so-secret-love-affair]

falling to the music pt. 2 (jily)

a/n: part 2 to my band au jily noodles arrives! featuring coffee, more of mary and a slight misunderstanding…

previous | next

Lily goes four whole days with no new messages. Okay, fine, her friends text her, and she gets some emails from university about upcoming assignments, and her Waterstones app cheerily supplies to her the hottest novels of the month in a push notification, but she doesn’t get a text from James, which means none of that counts. And Lily is not bothered about this in the slightest. She’s fine about it, dandy even. Her friends have not complained about the new habit she’s developed of checking her iMessages every spare moment she has. Only, maybe they have. Once. Or twice. Or thrice. It’s just she thought it had gone so well. She had flirted, hadn’t she? And he had been interested, or so she’d thought. He’d gone to get her a pen, for fuck’s sake. She’d written her number on his skin. She’d basically temporary tattooed him, it was a Sharpie and everything. But she hears not a peep from him, so apparently he’s just a typical guy-in-an-indie-rock-band who flirts with girls and never follows up. Which is fine, honestly - that’s his prerogative. All it means now is she’s got to learn to quell the incessant and unrelenting desire to see him again. Easier said than done, though.

It’s a Saturday when she decides to ring Mary up and meet her for a coffee. This is what I need, she thinks. I just need to let it all out in one sitting and then move the fuck on. I only bloody met him once. So she dresses up. She picks out that nice skirt she got in a charity shop in York and her pair of sixties style boots and douses herself in perfume, and goes marching out to enjoy a good old rant and a latte. She’s determined to have a nice morning, and to have everything go her way for once. And she almost gets that. Almost.

The coffee shop, to its credit, is exactly as she wanted it to be. An independent joint on a pretty street corner, it’s perfect for people watching, and decorated quite pleasantly with all sorts of vintage knickknacks. She likes it. It’s unknown enough that it doesn’t get too busy, and not so awfully pretentious that it doesn’t have any proper seating. Seriously, why does no one seem to want to let you sit down anymore? Settling herself comfortably in a gorgeous green armchair by the window, Lily sets her phone face down firmly on the table. She vows silently and fervently to herself that she will not check it until she has left the building. Then, she pulls out her novel, Emma - which is in every aspect the perfect comfort book - and contents herself to caring solely about what’s going on in Highbury. So far, so good.

Mary turns up about ten or so minutes late, despite her optimistic suggestion over the phone earlier that this time it might only be five. This is not an issue though because Lily knows her best friend like the back of her hand, and thus knows better than to believe that she might arrive on time. Things are still as they ought to be.

‘Right then, Lils,’ Mary says after having brought over their drinks. ‘I have it on good authority that we’re pissed off today, is that correct?’

‘However did you guess?’ Lily deadpans.

‘Oh, I think the scowling at your mobile whilst I was in the queue may have tipped me off. It’s about that guitarist of yours, isn’t it?’

‘Obviously, yeah. Him, and the fact that men are the root of all evil.’ At this, Mary throws her hands up as if in worship, closing her eyes and humming appreciatively.

‘Too damn right, babe. Although I will say, dating girls can still be tricky.’

‘Yeah, but I reckon I’d probably feel like less of a fool if I was this hung up on a pretty girl. Instead I’m here whining about not getting the attention of a good-for-nothing, piece of shit, stupid fucking man. Christ.’ She reaches forward to take a sip of her coffee, looking somewhat defeated.

‘He still hasn’t texted you I take it?’

‘Not once. I don’t know what I did wrong, Mary. I thought he liked me. You saw him, you saw how Sirius introduced me. Didn’t he like me?’

‘I mean yeah, it looked like it. I’m sure you didn’t do anything wrong, so don’t go blaming yourself for it. Guys fall at their feet for you. Maybe he does want to text you, but can’t. Maybe there was an emergency so he’s been too busy to think about dating, or maybe he’s a flustered coward who can’t work up the courage to ask you out, or maybe he’s driven off to the Welsh countryside on a lads trip to fuck about with his mates and didn’t realise he wouldn’t have any service. Or maybe it’s none of those things, and he isn’t interested at all. Whatever it is, you can’t start losing all your marbles ‘cause you’re waiting for a text.’ Mary puts both her hands down on the table palms up, and waits for Lily to take them. When their hands are slotted properly together, she gives a gentle squeeze and continues.

‘You, Lils, are a wonderful woman. And you have a wonderful woman’s life full of all sorts of wonderful things. Don’t waste it fretting over some bloke in a band.’ Lily takes a deep breath.

‘You’re right,’ she sighs. ‘You always are.’

‘I know,’ Mary answers with a smile.

‘Thanks. For putting up with all this, I mean. I promise I’ll be back to my usual self now. Nice, normal, non-boy-obsessed Lily.’

The phone that had been set face down on the table about twenty minutes ago chooses this moment as the perfect opportunity to buzz. The vibration sends it inching closer to the boundary between the safe, charted territory of antique mahogany wood, and the sheer drop down to the floor as if it, too, aches for the sweet release of death. Fuck me.

‘Fancy checking that?’ Mary asks sweetly.

‘Nope. No. No can do. Not going to check it.’

‘You can if you want to. We’ve all been there, I won’t judge.’

‘I have more resolve than that. I just said I’m back to normal. I don’t care if it’s him or not, I’m not going to look.’ Mary just stares at her. It’s not in any way critical, nor condemnatory. If anything, it just looks like she’s waiting it out. Lily counts about ten seconds of pained eye contact before-

‘I’m so sorry, I have to look.’ She snatches her phone from where it’s ended up suicidally near the edge of the table, taps it to light it up and of fucking course. There it is.

iMessages: Unknown Number

hii :) it’s james. is this lily?

‘Is it him?’ Mary has one eyebrow raised.

‘Fucking- yeah, it’s him.’

Lily wants so desperately to ignore the message. Here is a man who’s made her feel so incredibly pathetic, so incredibly angry, and he’s just waltzed on into her notifications without a care in the world. She shouldn’t dignify him with a response. And yet.

Lily: Lily Evans speaking.

James: oh, yay! okay perfect. well, hopefully you know who i am then. i’m the guitarist from the gig, like four days ago? you wrote your number on my arm.

Lily: Mhmm.

James: listen, i’m really sorry i didn’t get in contact sooner

James: you remember how when we were chatting that night i told you i was a dunce?

Lily: I do recall.

James: that is the truest thing i have ever said in my whole life. i am a dunce. i am stupid to the point of being unsalvageable. i am, you might say, a total buffoon.

Lily: And all this to say, what?

James: i dropped my phone :((

Lily: That’s why you haven’t texted me for four days? You dropped your sodding phone?

James: down an entire flight of stairs!

James: completely killed it

James: basically shot it dead and then broke both its legs for good measure

Lily: Right.

James: so then i was going to text you on sirius’ phone, but sirius is awful for pranks, and i didn’t want him to do something dickish or pretend that i died or something just to mess with you

James: he’s my best mate and i love him half to death, but he’s a bit of a knob sometimes

James: you don’t deserve that

James: and then remus is a fossil who still carries around a fucking nokia brick looking thing that i don’t even know how to use like he’s someone’s grandpa

James: no luck there

James: and peter was away with his girlfriend for their anniversary

James: so i had to wait till i got a new phone sorted to be able to message you

James: i’m really sorry :(

Mary takes a sip of her hot chocolate and looks somewhat disdainfully at Lily’s phone.

‘Chatty, isn’t he?’ Lily pulls an apologetic face.

‘I promise I won’t text him forever, I’m just… processing. Give me two minutes and I’m with you.’

Lily: I’m out with a friend right now so I can’t chat. But fine, I accept your apology. I’ll call you later and we can talk properly.

James: okay! absolutely no worries. talk to you soon?

Lily: Yes. Talk to you soon. But I’m still angry at you, so you’d better be on your best behaviour.

James: yes ma’am.

Lily clicks her phone shut, and pinches the bridge of her nose.

‘What did he say?’

‘He couldn’t text me because he chucked his phone down the stairs.’

‘Oh?’

‘And I hate to say it but… I buy it. It’s something he’d do.’ Mary humphs, unimpressed.

‘You still want to see him, then?’

‘I- yeah, yeah I do. He’s really… he’s really nice.’

‘Well then. Let’s see how Mr Nice keeps up.’

[strwberri-milk]

could you maybe write kaeya with a trad or romantic goth s/o? if you’ve already written this, i’m so sorry for asking!

if i need to be more specific, please tell me, or if you need to know more about the topic, feel free to respond to this ask with some questions! i really love how you characterise kaeya you just make him so ashshahgrrggrbsjakkajejd, yknow? makes me want to tear him apart limb by limb or smth sweet like gnawing his skin to the bones ���🤭🤭

i love romantic anything ngl but i think ive also seen some people who do a mix between. trad and romantic goth whichi think seems cool. im not gonna be too specific as to if its trad or romantic :D ALSO the ask preview made me think it was asking for a trad wife reader which is fine and dandy if you arent a bigot @ the same time. I'm also so glad you like my characterissation of him!! ive been learning how i see him and ive been pretty okay w how i see him rn :D

Of course the first thing he noticed about you was the extravagant way you did your makeup and clothes you wore. He's fascinated by how you dress, observing you before walking over and introducing himself to ask you a little more.

He loves watching you get ready for the day. The methodical way that you get all your things together and every step of your routine was one of the most alluring mysteries he loved to unravel. When the two of you moved in together he loved to wake up just to watch you dress and see how your whole look gets together.

Not only that, but is also very intrigued with the whole culture. Again, for him he's never really come into contact with others who were a part of the same subculture as you which means you get to answer any questions he has.

His natural curiosity means he's learned a lot and he's determined to put that knowledge to use. Whenever he sees you're running low on some makeup or sees you glancing at a piece of clothing that you like he makes a mental note of it to buy for you. Sometimes, he'll even buy you something new to try out, making sure that it's just as useful to you as your current things are.

He gets it in his mind to buy you this gorgeous set of clothes and try to personalize it for you. The set sat in his office for a month or two, Kaeya working on it in between his work for the Knights and innocently asking you questions about what you wear. He was aiming to make this both perfect for your aesthetic and comfort.

When he gave it to you you saw just how much of a labour of love it was for him. He's not exactly a tailor so he had someone come in and do the modifications he attempted to design, also giving you all the concept sketches he did so you could try and piece together his process.

It was beautiful, and definitely a piece that you wear for occasions, Kaeya smiling brightly with pride at the reminder that he somehow made the perfect thing for you to wear, and even tries to match it subtly to avoid outshining you.

[thgfanfictionlibrary]

General Rated Fics Masterlist (7)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 /

Created: March 12th, 2024

Last Checked: —-

As Real As Real Can Be-albinokittens300 (ao3) Summary: During the nights on the train, Katniss comes to accept how deeply she feels about Peeta. And when they have to be married for the Capitol, she decides to do something for them. Even if it's only them who knows. Classroom Announcements-deinde_prandium (ao3) Summary: Peeta loves the fact that his girlfriend has gotten a job working at his school. What he doesn't love so much is that he has to keep their relationship a secret...that is, until Katniss suggests making an announcement to their students. Color My Life-daydreamsandcaffeine (ao3) Summary: It all started when they were 5 - an interaction at daycare over crayons and carbs. Dandy Lion-DandelionSunset (ao3) Summary: Peeta tries to find his courage before going on stage to play his role of the Cowardly Lion in a third grade play of Wizard Of Oz. (Based on the Sever universe, but makes sense without having read it) Dinner Invitations.-albinokittens300 (ao3) Summary: Katniss has been letting herself fall for Peeta Mellark for a while since they both aged out of the reaping and now, must introduce him to her sister and mother. She doesn't wear nervous well. Employee Training-Abagail_Snow (ao3) Summary: During orientation for a new job, Katniss learns to lighten up with another new hire. Everlark/THG Drabble Buffet!-albinokittens300 (ao3) Summary: Place for all my loose Everlark/The Hunger Games Drabbles (fics with anything from 100-500 words that don't fit into another fic). All of them are not directly connected but take place in canon unless explicitly said otherwise. Mostly fluffy, but can be anything and is perpetually open to suggestions. Can't promise everything, but will say it never hurts to tell me any ideas that you have! Fashion Dough-daydreamsandcaffeine (ao3) Summary: The combination of working non-stop and moving is taking its toll on Katniss, and Peeta is on a mission to cheer her up. (In which Peeta gets crafty with carbs.) Flowers in the Window-Deinde_prandium (ao3) Summary: "And now we’re here and now it’s fine-So far away from there and there is time, time, time-To plant these seeds and watch them grow-So there’ll be flowers in the window when we go” One sleepless night, Peeta ponders the idea of having kids with Katniss. Post-MJ, Pre-epilogue. Based on the song “Flowers in the Window” by Travis. Written for Prompts in Panem Round 5, Day 4: Hyacinth (Fertility). For Real…-Alliswell (ao3) Summary: Peeta and Katniss reach and agreement... this time for real.

[tordenvejr]

Hello, I was wondering if you maybe have any advice on something. Basically to me it often feels like when I’m doing badly it’s because “the universe” is punishing me for something or rather that I’m meant to learn some kind of lesson. But at the same time it’s been like this for so long and the times where good things do happen seem random and arbitrary to me, so I don’t understand why I deserve this while other people are doing just fine. I guess maybe I need to take more agency over my life but I feel like I try so hard every day like comforting parts of me that are scared etc. Also kind of in the same vein I had a rough abusive childhood and sometimes I don’t understand how any loving universe or spirit guides could’ve just watched that happen

i've struggled with this too 💛

i think it's quite common to transfer the experience of being punished or abused and project it onto the universe - or your spirit guides, the archangels, other beings, etc. this is such a complex discussion because for example with deity work, or when divining you want to use discernment to gauge the essence of what or who you're connecting with. just like with people, "dead doesn't mean wise" and powerful doesn't mean it's a power that resonates with and is suitable for you, and so on. but specifically with source, the seed and heart of everything that is, it's my belief that it is in entirety pure, loving and kind. i believe this because i sense it and because in essence all life wants to live, to expand, to blossom, flourish, and these are not expressions of life that are compatible or supported by destruction or repression.

so while pain, grief, suffering can define to us and to all of life what we dont want -> what we do want ("contrast" in law of attraction) i believe there can be more to it, and again that discernment is needed. for example the law of attraction is one out of twelve spiritual laws or truths (one, vibration, correspondence, inspired action, transmutation, cause and effect, compensation, relativity, polarity, rhytm, balance) right away there's more to it. i also believe different souls and lifetimes are affected to varying degrees of these. and that it plays a role what soul plan you have coming in (though i believe you can alter and change it) this can also depend on past lives in the sense of if you came in with the intention of healing past wounds or gain more insight, a soul could seek to aid the planet - that does not always mean it's pleasant and comfortable, sometimes death is a part of that plan, and sometimes horrible things happen for no other reason than that this is earth, it's dense and we have a lot of polarity and contrast. in any case we bring it down, ground it in, and do our best to move through our own suffering and ease that of others'. it's a similar story with bodily symptoms or conditions, sometimes it's a repressed trauma (of this or another life) expressing itself, sometimes its a spiritual law, sometimes there's a soul perspective intention behind it, and sometimes we are alive in human bodies and things just happen. discernment! and again we ground it in, we be present, if healing is needed we heal and lean as much into relief as possible, and we aid, bring as much relief and support for others as possible. head in the clouds and two feet on the ground, we navigate our world, and i always think it best to do that with compassion, understanding and not forcing your perspective or your own unique life experience onto others because you just don't know how their cocktail of life has been put together. and it doesn't matter. because in any case they are souls just like you, and deserve love, or aid, or care, or safety just like you.

and lastly on childhood abuse, sometimes you touch so deeply on such painful elements of life so early because your soul knows you are capable of reaching for the very opposite much faster, with much greater precision and insight than if your childhood was handy dandy. so do i believe that we can learn in love and joy? yes. do i believe a traumatic childhood is the only way to understanding and spiritual development? absolutely not. we take different paths. this was mine, maybe it was yours. discernment.

i've been interested in spirituality as long as i can remember and i've been aware of the connection to source almost as long, if not, to some extent, always. a couple of years ago i had an increase in bodily symptoms and in symptoms of ocd, this followed grief and stress. and i started to experience it being less easy to differentiate between anxiety and intuition, and it was very, very hard for me because of how important my spirituality is to me. and i took more than a year of not really touching on the spiritual much at all, i directly told my guides, i cannot connect now i need to focus on healing. and i did, and i was scared that connection would never have a place again, but towards the end of last year and this it came back even stronger.

all this to give nuance, but my most important piece of advice in this is to look into whether you may have religious anxiety or religious ocd, and if it resonates, i highly advice you take a break from considering, engaging with or seeking out spirituality. work on the wounds that cause distortion ideally in therapy, and when that persception is clear, come back to it when it's time provided you feel called to.

it was my experience that my guides held space for me at that time.

having discernment and feeling the difference between anxiety and spirituality requires even more grounding, healing, patience and gentleness with anxiety, and that's okay, it's doable, but one thing at a time. first you heal

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Consider Downey eventually getting his doctorate, Vetinari has the city so everything stopped being so much on fire for five minutes, he has some money, he could go on his own field trip - not the Grand Sneer, mind you, just to, you know, explore, see different cultures, collect exotic rare poisonous plants, see what delightful alcohol is made over there.

Of course, when he comes back, nobody believes that he made it to the Counterweight continent, that's bullshit, it's walled-off (yeah, but assassins don't see walls as obstacles), and sure he's made friends, but why don't they never write? (Maybe because communication to and from is very limited? Downey offers, but yes, it'd be nice to exchange letters here and there.)

But after the Silver Horde gets the hold of Agatean Empire and letters and later clacks become regular, Downey gets in touch with all those people he's made friends with and who were honestly pretty thrilled about that one time he got painted as a tiger (because tigers are awesome!).

And it's all fine and dandy until one of the friends sends Downey a copy of a book he's working on, and Downey who can speak Agatean but not read (because the pictograms are even worse with way more wiggly lines) takes it to Vetinari, because Vetinari can read agatean (gods know why he learned), and Vetinari has a Very Difficult Time to keep his face neutral because he's just gotten into his hands the Discworld Art of War and Downey had apparently seen its author more hungover than sober most of the time.

I love that today is the day for "what if" asks with my peak favourite characters. This delights me to no end.

Downey would take himself on the most decadent, obscenely lush Tour that ever happened. He'd show Vetinari the itinerary and Vetinari is like 'I feel that at some point this is going to kill you, however you are so incredibly pleased with yourself about the entire situation I shan't infringe.'

yeah, but assassins don't see walls as obstacles

Especially not Downey. Who sees anything that involves Rule Breaking as a Fun Challenge. Something to pass the time. He likes puzzles - not the wordy kind Vetinari is so keen on - but the practical physical kind.

Downey is the sort of person to be faced with the riddle "there's a fork in the road and two angels guard the paths forward. One path will lead to death, the other to life. One angel always tells the truth, the other one lies. They know which they are. They know where the two paths go. You may ask one yes or no question. What do you ask to determine which path leads to freedom?" with like "well, I poison both and then send people I don't like down each path and take the option that didn't result in the horrific death of one of the participants."

Vetinari: that's not the solution, Downey.

Downey: it's A solution.

Vetinari: you're supposed to ask a question.

Downey: I ask them: would you like some tea?

Vetinari:

Vetinari: I hate that you followed the rule that it's a yes/no question.

Downey: if they say no, I just stab them.

--

Tigers *are* awesome!

(Vetinari: I am aware of this)

--

I love the idea that Downey speaks Agatean but can't read it and Vetinari can read it but can't speak it. I love that between them, they one whole person who is fluent. It's so very them and I think it beautiful.

Downey is like, 'wow this takes my dyslexia to whole new levels' and his friend Discworld!Sun Tzu is like, 'you know, it's fine. I'll just read everything to you.'

(Vetinari learned Agatean because he was bored one summer and that's just the sort of man he is.)

Vetinari gets really into the Art of War mostly because it's things like: The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. And Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.

--

I love this entire thing as a premise and have accepted it into my head as canon.

In other news, you should maaaaaybe write?? it??

<3 <3 <3

[crescendeyes]

I am grateful for

As we enter the month of July-Aug, I felt like I should really analyse what I am thankful for and count my blessings a little.

I know being critical of yourself is embedded in our DNA to humble ourselves from delusion. There is a beauty in delusion - its either things are SUPER DUPER BAD or FINE AND DANDY.

Being extremely fearful avoidant, I find myself constantly confusing people and myself on the decisions that I make. It is a constant push and pull that I struggle with all my life with a lack of awareness of it's existence.

People with a fearful-avoidant attachment style distrust others and withdraw from relationships in order to avoid rejection. This leads people with a fearful-avoidant attachment to avoid the very relationships they crave.

Struggling to manage this part of my life, I managed to fall into the traps of despair every time I make a decision. They were either too reckless or too careful - never anything in between.

So, in order to re-evaluate the quarter of my life, before I turn 30, I won't be a list of things I want to achieve. Instead, I want to count my blessings and start showing gratitude to myself and my life, including the people who made it possible for these little celebrations.

Set boundaries and realise what my dealbreakers are in a relationship.

Let me explain - in the past, I would fight for a relationship and continue to work on it till there was nothing left behind except resentment. MAYBE, just MAYBE, if Aaron and I didn't breakup the first time around and I didn't have to grow up after the string of bad luck in 2022, I could tolerate and continue to work on relationships like I used to. So, being able to set boundaries and be honest with myself what I want to keep vs don't was the biggest step I took to self love and actualisation.

2. Love someone twice

Some might find this very toxic but if you never try, you'll never know. Hence, no. 1.

3. Performed for a huge festival in the second time of my life

Yes, I performed at Peakstorm Festival to open for Joji. While it may not seem like a feat for most musicians and artist, but it was once in a life time opportunity that I will forever be grateful for.

4. Moved out

I finally did it. There is no way I can describe how lucky I feel to get a place that I only dreamt of getting back in 2020 - and it took 3 years to rent this place. Although, rent is expensive and I am looking for opportunities to move to a new place that would be more affordable. 2024 is a time I wanna focus on growing my wealth and saving money.

5. Travelling with Aaron, meeting each others family, a sense of stability....

It is difficult for me to find stability cause I've never known it all my life. But even for that short period of time, visiting his family and travelling to Taiwan & Phuket, I felt like this is it. He is my forever, and his family and friends LOVE me. Unfortunately, no. 1 was the path I decided to take.

6. Dad

Dad is better now and we are planning to travel to Copenhagen and London together as a family.

7. Mum

Mum is open to the idea of counselling and started to see a therapist after hearing me out. In a way, I'm lucky she was even open to it for assistance. I love her.

8. Miso

Miso was with me since 6 June 2023, she has lived with me for 17 days and she will forever be the best emotional support kitty in my life. I have never had a cat with me before so it was an amazing experience. I will miss her so so dearly <3

9. Fixed my relationship with Cel & Cam

10. I'm travelling again

11. I am not chasing relationships anymore

12. I am in a good stable career

13. I have a manager that trust me and doesn't micro manage me - plus, he kinda has a thing for me or something idk.

14. I got a new tattoo this year so yay

15. Aaron is making tiktok videos of me while I am seemingly unbothered by it

16. I now know Hoeden is not my real friends.

17. I am learning how to swim.

18. I attended Harpreet & Nicole's wedding this year.

19. I ACTUALLY became friends with Aaron Chan? Wow. lol. The universe is weird.

20. I have great friends and made more this year.

21. People LOVE my apartment and they often compliment it hehe

22. Renewed my insurance policy because I can afford it bitches.

So there will be more blessings and I can't count but I always do my best to remember them whole heartedly.

If you read it this far, thank you. I hope this brings you peace.

[zwei-rhunen]

i got to be a teacher/dungeon mentor today uwu i didnt know this day would come so early pls i’m still so lost in dungeons how did it end up being ME-

there was 1 first-timer, and i’m guessing two others that haven’t touched this dungeon in a long time

anyway that was all cool and fine and dandy and everyone was great and the run was a lil romp thru the park but we got to the end and i got to lvl 49

but also lmao

at the beginning of most dungeons, i’ve gotten into the habit of quickly glancing at everyone’s info just to see who’s new whenever i’m a healer/tank, and also bc i’m nosy asf, and now i just do it all the time regardless of the job i’m in

so at the start of this dungeon, tank says they’re new to tanking, healer has one other job leveled, and the other dps has a few jobs scattered around. so it’s like okay cool, someone else knows what they’re doing because 99% of the time i sure as hell dont LMAO

quickly realize we dont know what we’re doing. first room tank doesn’t realize to pull the second wave of mobs. i wanted to pull, i really, really wanted to pull for them, but i’m black mage and very squishy and i didnt want to be That player, but then i think he started running towards the dungeon start line and i was like “okay maybe i’ll just pull” but then i think they saw the mobs and pulled.

they went through the cavern levels of the dungeon, went down one of the false hallways, but i figured they wanted the loot so its all good, i just waited by the intersection and watched the 3 blue dots get to the end of that dungeon, pause, move around for a sec and then kinda uncertainly run back out.

and in that moment i realized “oh no, i’m the experienced one in the group D:” which is BAD because do you know how lost i get in dungeons? i get very lost. i rarely run pugs. the only saving grace is because i’d already run this particular dungeon like 3 times bc of roulette so the mechanics were refreshed for me. but like everytime i get Cutter’s Cry i cringe on the inside because i have like horrible memories of this dungeon, trying to do it by myself with the FC squadron and having a bad time b/c i didnt know how to get to the next level bc of all the shifting sands nonsense and the sandworm boss and also squadrons being... squadrons.

the first two bosses go fine, then we get to the third boss and i’m over here thinking like okay, i’m probably the most experienced here, i should probably just shoot a short message about the mechanics for this Chimera boss rq bc its a bitch to figure out independently lmao” b/c i’ve been silent the whole time b/c honestly the run has been going fine (ignoring the first 3 minutes of it), its a little slow but its not any slower than squadrons and theyre learning, and i’m learning black mage anyway and all the other runs have been gogogo so i didnt mind dawdling around /shrug

but then also social anxiety kicked in bc this means i have to SPEAK UP and TALK and DIRECT people but im like well whatever, if they know the mechanics and are annoyed at me then i’ll just take the ratio+L bc i’d rather not sit here and do this boss 300 times sooo -typetypetype send-

and they were super appreciative and i almost died during the second attempt of that fight bc i was trying to type and/or too focused on rotation so i’d miss the violet/blue calls and get scathed but it ended well and i got 3 comms and it seems like theyre all friends bc same FC so i hope they have a good day

[mr-voorhees-husband]

I loved your hc and fic so much, Could I request a short fic of Tssm!Quentin and the reader going on a lil date :D

YES YESYEYSYSEYS

yes. 100% 1000%

Partially for myself because I wanna be Quentin's gossip partner but I can re-write it to be more romantic if you so desire my friend (also this was written on mobile too, so it will be properly formatted later i promise)

Warnings: a lil body horror in Quentin's story?, Reader + Quentin go on a cute date and do.. idk date things (man I'm aroace idk how dates work)

Reader - Mostly gender neutral but Quentin uses masc compliments

"What happened to 'hanging low'?"

Quentin scoffed at your question, dismissing it with one of his signature smirks. For someone who had the smartest person in the city as his bestfriend, he didn't make the smartest decsions sometimes. His ego wouldn't let him and he was lucky you liked that about him. If you didn't, Quentin would be minus a partner. "Please, Mysterio never hides, especially not when it comes to bringing his handsome partner on a date, my love."

"Mhm," You hummed, taking a sip of the expensive champagne he'd bought, "and what will the wonderful Mysterio do if Spider-man happens to crash our date?"

"Ah-" Quentin got a look on his face, an odd flurry of panic and concern. He'd obviously not thought of it, and it had you biting back a smile from the otherside of the table. It'd been his idea, or rather, his insisting that ended you two in this high end restaurant. It really was nice, expensive as all hell, but nice nonetheless. You were lucky you talked him out of going to another one down the street, a semi-formal dress code was much more appealing than a black-tie one. "Well- he'd beat him, and take his date to a much better restaurant."

"You mean like how you beat him last night?" You were teasing, of course. Quentin could tell from a mile away when you had that glint in your eyes that you didn't mean harm. He flushed with a pout, before clearing his throat and sitting up straighter.

"That was Shocker's fault, he shot at me." You nodded at his words, deciding against pointing out how it was in fact Quentin who got in the way of the blast. "Oh- did I tell you about what happened before the fight?"

That was another thing you adored about you villainous actor, he gossiped. So much it wasn't funny, but oh, it was more than just a little entertaining. Being his partner meant you were told everything he knew... which meant you basically knew everything about the Sinister Eleven.

It'd probably be best if you didn't meet them at this point, anyway. You don't think you could look Sandman in the eyes after learning how his clothes work...

"So, Flint, O'hirn, Adrian, and Mason are all in the like.. living room area?" You raised an eyebrow and he waved his hand, something, you learned, he did often. "Not important, anyway. You know how Rhino can take off the chest and pelvis piece, right?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah, you told me." You had to think about it for a moment, but he most definitely had told you at some point.

"He'd taken off his chest piece because he needed to cool down, so he's laying on his and Ox's designated area, cooling down." Quentin was in it now, hands moving as he talked. You'd have to start making a list of all the things you liked about him, you realized. How animated he was would definitely be one of the top 5. "Sandman goes over, and says something along the lines of 'do you think i can fit in the rest of the armor?' So of course Alex wants to see if he can."

"Oh god."

"It gets worse." Quentin's smile was on the edge of being sadistic, eyes lit up as if this was the funniest thing in the world. "Sandman slips into the armor, and its all fine and dandy. Until he realizing, he, for some reason, is moving."

"No. Please don't tell me he-?"

"It took them two hours to sort him out of Rhino's tissue." You cringed, the little details given being enough to give you the full picture. Quentin giggled like an insane person, and you couldn't help but chuckle in response. "I mean- why would they even thing that was a good idea?"

"Aren't these the same two guys that Spidey used to beat on a daily basis back before Mysterio?" His nod had you shaking your head in disbelief. "Jesus you'd expect them to know better."

"Exactly!" Quentin's sudden raise in volume had people looking your direction, but you just glared in response. So your boyfriend was loud, so he could be a bit chaotic. So what? That didn't mean they could say anything, especially not while you were here.

A blissful sigh had you looking back at him, your eyes finding his in a stare that had you blushing. Another thing you liked about him, you noted, was how he looked at you. Like you were some kind of deity. It was equal parts embarrassing and adorable. "What?"

"I like it when you get angry for me." Quentin reached over, smirking like the little stuck-up idiot (affectionate) he was, and picking you hand up in his own. "It makes me happy I found someone to brag about."

"Wow," you flushed, chuckling, "that's a hell of a change of pace."

Quentin smiled, pressing a kiss to your knuckles as he downright purred his next words. "Its why you love me."

With a roll of your eyes, despite how your heart was fluttering and your face rivaled the color of a peach, you scoffed.

"That and a couple 100 other reasons," You pulled his own hand to you, flipping the script as you kissed the ring finger knuckle, "my love."

[adventures-on-foster-island]

Orange looks the way the fruit tastes, but if it was warm. Turquoise looks like a cool swim on a hot day. Lavender looks like a gentle breeze in the early morning. There are lots of humans who can't experience those colors and many others.

Standing on two legs is fine and dandy, but you loose balance and speed in exchange for the height, and I'm pretty sure even on four legs you're taller than a lot of humans. A lot of humans can't stand at all, on two or four legs. Im willing to bet there's a gadget that could help you get up an escalator, but those are kinda scary anyway. Some humans are too scared to even try to use an escalator.

You may not be able to ride on roller coasters, but you can experience your very own amusement ride by flying, which is what ferris wheels are trying to imitate any way. Most humans would give up almost anything to be able to fly like you, and I think that's why you get a lot of hate; humans are jealous.

Not all humans have great dexterity with their hands. In fact your vines can do a lot more than some humans can do with their hands. There's probably another gadget that can help you play video games, since some humans with certain disabilities can play video games with just their eyes.

Lots of humans and other Pokémon are lactose intolerant and can't have dairy, but there are so many alternatives! Soy, almond, and oat milk, cheese made from nuts and yeast, pudding made from acorns, the list goes on.

I'm sorry the world isn't very accessible to someone of your stature, but there are humans who suffer from that as well. Humans who are so tall they have to duck through doors or old buildings, humans who have to have clothes specially made for them, humans who need mobility aides that are too big for some places.

A lot of humans are allergic to fragrances, and some "super smeller" humans with an especially strong sense of smell. For those people, a lot of things smell too strongly for them to be anywhere near. There are also humans with vision problems that impact their depth perception. Whether they are missing an eye, are partially blind, or their brain doesn't perceive things the way most humans do, they struggle to tell how far away something is. Even more commonly, a lot of humans are either "near sighted" or "far sighted" meaning they have an easier time seeing things closer or farther away respectively.

Snow is pretty overrated. If I never see it again it'll be too soon, which is why I moved to a tropical climate. Its just cold and wet, and there are a lot of humans who struggle to maintain their own body temperature due to things like anemia. Some humans will never experience snow or cold due to the climate they live in.

Humans do not have universal experiences. All of the things you've described are things that some or many humans deal with on a daily basis. They are difficulties that we all must fight through everyday, and that in of itself is the most human thing you can do. To keep going, keep learning and growing and changing, that is what it means to be human. Less important is your species, more important is your mindset. You are deserving of the same respect and basic rights as any human, as any creature, in any world.

I highly encourage you to come visit Foster Island. The entire place is accessible to humans and Pokémon of all sizes and abilities, and you can see how our Pokémon staff members are treated with equal respect to their human counterparts. It may help you come to terms with the way you are, help you get through what I would say is probably some pretty heavy dysphoria, and make some friends.

I've been thinking about how I'll never truly be able to experience life like a human does.

I can't see the same colors humans can. There's lots of super cool sounding colors, like orange and turquoise and lavender that I'll never be able to know what they look like.

I can't stand on two legs. My body isn't built for it, I'm meant to be a quadruped. There's lots of human things that need only two legs for it that I'll never be able to experience, like escalators.

I'm super heavy compared to humans, so there's lots of stuff I can't go on or I'll break it, like that Ferris Wheel in Nimbasa.

I don't have hands, and even though my vines are super dexterous, I can't do as much with them as humans can with hands. I've seen game controllers with lots and lots of buttons that I just don't have enough vines to use.

I can't eat some of the same stuff as humans. My diet is mostly fruit, leaves, and sunlight, and I need to eat dirt and rocks to help me digest things. Stuff like pizza is super yummy, but milk isn't very good for me, so I can't have a lot of it. And icy treats are too cold for me to eat without hurting.

My wings and torso and neck are super big, so I can't fit in a lot of places. I have to fold up my wings to fit through doorways, and even then there's a lot of doors I can't fit through, even though humans can go through them super easily.

I smell things super strongly compared to humans, so smells that are fine to them are super overwhelming to me. I met a human once who put on something called "perfume", and it was so strong it hurt to smell.

I don't have good "depth perception". My eyes aren't like a human's, they have eyes on the front of their heads instead of on the sides. I can't tell how far away things are as good as a human can.

I'm "cold-blooded", so I can't heat up myself like a human can. I can't go into cold places safely, and I can't play in snow and do all the fun snow stuff I've heard humans do.

I don't even think like a human. I've seen some stuff about human instincts, like "fight or flight" or adrenaline, and I don't have any of that.

Even if I could magically become a human, I still wouldn't be able to truly experience life like one. I haven't had the same experiences as a human, it wouldn't be the same as a human who was born human. And I don't know if being human in body would be comfortable for me or not.

It's a lot.

[simonsnowichooseyou]

This excellent essay was posted by @goodbyedandelion and reposted on Instagram—however their account sadly seems gone now. But it is in rememberence of their Tumblr spirit that I post a continuation to their essay!

EVEN MORE Reasons Why Carry On is so groundbreaking as a YA Fantasy/Romance

Misconceptions/Character Complexity

A large topic in YA Contemporary is gossip, but I feel like fantasy doesn’t touch on this as much. Think of how others perceive one another in Carry On. Early on we learn that Simon, for example, saw Penny as different because of her race. But of course, we quickly know this isn’t true.

But what about Agatha? In Harry Potter, for example, Lavender Brown and other feminine characters are often looked down upon because of their femininity. We often as a culture perceive beauty as overcompensation for what’s inside. Sometimes Agatha is looked at in the same light in Carry On, but when we see things from her POV, we realize that Agatha is perhaps the smartest one there. Maybe she’s not Penny Bunce-smart, but she has the survival instincts that Penny lacks.

Agatha isn’t the only one. Baz looks cold and unfeeling from others’ POVs, but we quickly learn that he is a boy with a soft heart that’s been hardened by his past. Everyone thinks he cares about nothing but we know he cares about his mother and how she’d feel about him; his father and step-mother and siblings; Simon, of course; Bunce, in his own way; he even cares about flowered suits and dramatic entrances! We think Bunce is nerdy and perhaps annoying, but we learn she’s very sweet and like a mother to Simon. And the mage. Ugh, the mage. We think he cares about Simon but we learn that for every bit he cares about Simon, he cares about the war more.

Rowell doesn’t allow any character to be simple, stereotypical, or as they appear. My sister, for example, was saying that Baz sounded like a stereotypical gay man in the media. But he’s not, is he? He might love fashion but Rowell does not make him simple or stereotypical. Everyone is so complex, and she uses the multi-POV to not just show us their complexity but also the complexity of how they are viewed by others.

Woman on Woman Drama/Anger

For years and years, only one woman was allowed to have a true seat at the table in films. Take Indiana Jones, the original Avengers, and Star Wars for example. This woman was often made to be the sex appeal or romantic interest, but I’ll save that for another day. Because of there only being one spot, it set a precedent that women in media needed to fight with each other to take that spot, thus depriving us of women getting along!

At first, I was worried Rowell had fallen into this trap. Bunce thinks Agatha is simple and too feminine, Agatha thinks Bunce is a major pain in the ass. Their dislike for one another is complicated in that they’re essentially two different types of feminism battling it out, and half of their fight was about Simon and their roles in his life.

But in the end, Penny and Agatha create a relationship that exists outside of their relationship with Simon. Penny sees Agatha’s strength and resilience; Agatha recognizes Penny’s harsh exterior for what is is. When Agatha moves away, they text without his even knowing. Penny is the one that decides they need to check on and save her. In the end, penny and Agatha fight alongside one another.

Rowell didn’t just give us a feminine friendship—she showed us what we’ve been doing, and how to get from Point A to point B. I think it’s the most underrated part of the series.

True Friendship

It might sound bad, but I truly believe a lot of today’s media ruins the idea of friendship. I just feel like none of the portrayals are realistic. Friends are either joined at the hip and have never fought (toxic) or never get along (also toxic). The fact that Baz and Penny and Simon and Penny and Agatha and Penny can get into fights but still continue to love one another platonically is really heartwarming to me.

Trauma/Mental Illness

I remember getting to the end of Harry Potter and thinking “he went through all of that and we’re just supposed to leave him now?” We see some remnants in the most cursed play ever: The Cursed Child. But more than trauma we see someone who looks back on the days they risked their life everyday with *longing.* While that’s about the most Harry Potter thing Harry Potter has ever done (and the most canonical part of that play) it’s so unrealistic. You’re telling me Harry grew up with nothing and was an amazing father—minus a few spats with his son. You’re telling me Harry was able to hold it together emotionally after fighting for his life from ages 11-18 without a therapists help? You’re telling me Harry lost two father figures in the ministry of magic AND spent 7 years going through what amounted to a lesson titled “the government is corrupt” just to be a part of that government!?

Wayward son isn’t like that. Wayward Son shows us what happened to Simon afterwards, and it’s not peaches and cream. He had therapy, he quit therapy. A lot of us have been Simon on that couch, and we all needed the Baz in our life to drag us across a metaphorical America. Wayward Son is hands-down my favorite book. Realistic depictions of mental illness, check. Subverting our expectations of after the end, check. Reading it feels like taking a road trip, check.

As OP mentioned, Simon is a beloved chosen one because he’s just so wrong for the role. He’s not levelheaded where he should be, he’s bold in all the wrong places, he couldn’t possibly maintain a professional relationship with the coven. Meanwhile his super-hot enemy Baz was the absolute perfect choice to be chosen, but he was completely passed over. And part of this chalks up to how Simon became so powerful—fate isn’t twisting its whims this way and that. Simon is only chosen because he was a Petri dish experiment-gone-wrong baby. When Simon asks the fates why, really he should be asking the mage. There’s something delightful about the fact that Simon was made. The chosen one was made, and in the same process, so was the greatest threat.

De-escalation

I think it’s clear by now that Carry On is a great book, Simon Snow is an amazing series, and Rainbow Rowell sure can write. But I feel the need to point out that the end of Carry On wasn’t well-received by everyone. I recommend the series to everyone I know and some people are really disappointed you don’t get a big magical battle at the end. Some people think Simon filling in the humdrum was a cop out. But I disagree. I felt it was thrilling to witness a book where war was as stupid in fantasy land as it can be in real life. This is the first fantasy I’ve ever read where they find a better way to handle conflict than senseless fighting. It’s emotionally rewarding, to me, to see de-escalation. To see conflicts fixed before they start to be huge problems. It was a risky choice for an end, you have to admit. But Rowell pulls it off amazingly.

Nothing is Wrapped in a Bow

A day will never go by without me thinking about the fact that Simon Snow Salisbury doesn’t know who his parents are. Or how Baz will never know what exactly happened with his mother—whether she really ended herself to avoid vampirism and whether she would’ve done it to her too. We’ll never even quite understand the mage’s plan behind fix the humdrum and get an all powerful boy wizard on his side. Rowell doesn’t wrap everything up. She gives you closure as often as she gives you something to ponder. The ending of Harry Potter was so controversial, I think, because it spelled out so clearly much of what was happening. And what you didn’t learn in that epilogue, Rowling released later through Pottermore and interviews. That’s fine and dandy—but there’s something to be said for ending Simon Snow’s books with questions. Not infuriating questions but rather things that I’ll always ponder—that will shed new light on different situations depending on how I look at them. Rowell sets a precedent that you can fill in Simon’s world with your imagination while also reminding us that life doesn’t have endings. Not really, the way books to. Rowell is one of the few writers of today’s fantasy, I’d argue, who’s okay letting things go unanswered. There’s always a thread of fantasy and magic going. It’s something that will keep Simon alive in my heart for many, many years to come.

So yeah, that’s what I think about when I think about Simon Snow. It’s not nearly as coherent as the original post but I hope you enjoy it.

[photobombingcryptid]

“Can you repeat the whole thing again.”

The library is a mix of modern, Cybertronian design with elements typically found in organic culture with its ornamental features. Darker colors, like browns and red, dominate the palette. The light that lits up the room is akin to candles with warmer, orange tones making for a relaxed atmosphere. The middle of the room has various seating areas, with a few pressed right against the tall windows which provide additonal natural light.

The sun on planet Salus is just setting down, painting the room in hazy, autumn overlay.

Celeste covers his mouth with servo to cover up an amused chuckle, bringing his legs up onto the couch. Formalities how one should and should not sit were thrown out the window. Separated by a coffee table with plenty of energon cubes and drinks to indulge in, Meme is sat at the couch across. With him sitting at the edge of the seat, it’s as if he wanted to jump out from the sofa and strangle Celeste.

He really wants to act upon his more violent impulses.

But he knows better with the security standing just outside the library.

“My apologies,” Celeste sighs with a smile on his face, “but if you insist, I will go through the whole thing again. I can imagine taking it all in on the first go must have been quite overwhelming, er... What was the name? You run by so many nicknames, it’s hard to keep track of...”

“We agreed you’d call me Blaze.”

“Right, Blaze. Let’s start from the beginning, before the incident. You were a pivotal courier supplying Ether-2 with valuable supplies — everything from importing and exporting resources to supplying us with Ether-2 would struggle to secure due to the location of the solar system and its neighbors. In your words: it’s smack-dab beyond the dead-end zone where one wrong mis-step will have you swarmed by space pirates and much worse. You were among the few mechs skilled and willing enough to put your life at risk just to complete a job.”

“It was worth the money.” Meme— Blaze — nods, still at the edge of the seat, “it was all fine and dandy until you guys decided it was a ripe time to drive a dagger in my backside. Real smooth.” Heavy tones of sarcasm detected. “How did you know I was an outlier the entire time? When I killed those fraggers in that church — you are very much welcome, by the way — I secured some documents that would have only been able to be secured only if someone had worked at the Jhiaxus Academy.”

“That was me. I worked there.”

Blaze’s vents hitch for a second before quickly finding the right words. “... And you are a Functionalist. You worked at a place that was a safe space for outliers: a group of people ostracized for existing. Functionalists hated them. Us. Me.”

“I understand your outrage, but believe me when I tell you that I have different beliefs of what Funtionalism should have always been like. There was nothing I could do about that at that time and I kept my beliefs to myself so I could work in peace.”

“How come I don’t recognize you from the academy? What was your position there?”

“I was in the IT sector. Server maintenance, security, data storage. Only a very few people have seen me; most of the time, I’ve spent crawling in the underbelly of the academy where all the servers were installed. Word about the students would still reach us since my fellow collegues were professors teaching students sometimes. This is how I got to learn about you and I became quite infatuated by your powers.”

“Not the first or last one. Go on.”

“Being in the IT sector, I did have an unrestricted access to your...” A cheeky shrug. “Everything. Everything about your powers. Unfortunately, the day the academy burnt down destroyed a lot of data, including yours. What I’ve managed to salvage was heavily corrupted and restoring that data took me years.”

“So, all this time, I’ve had a secret admirer. Lovely. Let’s move back onto the more recent history. You told me you’ve started to work in the politics on Salus and other surrounding colonies, you’ve risen to power to get to the very top and you are, in a surprising twist, very happy I killed those people at Ether-2. Why?”

“It should be obvious Salus, Ether-2 and the rest of the colonies have heavy influence in their religious beliefs, especially in Primus and other original Cybertronian gods. Functionalism could be considered the core of our politics, albeit with a different message than the predecessor. The colonies have always been more independent but in recent years we’ve started the process of unifying them under a singular system.”

“Something like a federation?”

“Yes. Ether-2 had been growing out of Salus’ control for quite a while. Their practises were getting out of hand and something needed to be done about those individuals. That’s where you come in.”

“Yea, right. I did the dirty job for you. I’ll repeat myself again: you are very welcome.”

“And I am very grateful for that. And I also agree that the near-death experience was absolutely uncalled when the overly-ambituous sadists took away your outlier abilities. However, people still want justice; after all, what you did was a crime, wasn’t it? Here, instead of putting you through months and years of prolonged trials, consider my offer — your verdict — as a better alternative. Community service, if you will.”

“You want me to use my outlier powers.”

“Correct...”

“To help you with the population crisis.”

“Correct!”

“You are insane.”