#yes this post is about astarion

[vgeta]

ya know the feel when you call a man pushing 40 your wife

[chaotic-illusion]

One of the really great things about having loved ones--friends, family, spiritual leaders, etc.-- is that when you're going through a crisis and get tunnel vision from all the fear and anger life's challenges throw at you, they can be a source of strength and comfort. They can talk you off the ledge. They can guide you towards a better, healthier path. A path where growth and healing are possible. And it isn't manipulation, it isn't denying you free will. It's help, a clearer perspective, an act of love, and a belief that you are better than the terrible decisions we are all susceptible to making when the shit hits the fan.

[cheekylittlepupp]

listen this is very random but...I used to think people edit his eyes brighter in this scene but lord...

[shr3ktiddies]

who decided to give bg3 men bodybuilder bodies and abs

GALE WOULD NOT HAVE ABS this man is the stereotypical NERD! he would DIE after jogging for 5 minutes his body would be SOFT and his knees would CRACK

AND HALSIN?? THAT MAN WOULD ABSOLUTELY HAVE A HEALTHY LAYER OF FAT COVERING HIS MUSCLES!! INNER ABS AND DAD BOD ON THE OUTSIDE!!

ASTARION WOULD HAVE A SKINNY AND DELICATE BODY TYPE!! WHO DECIDED TO GIVE HIM A SIX PACKS LOOK AT HIS STRENGTH STATS MAN

[utterdrip]

i have so many feelings about this conversation. the grief and guilt for the lives he took. how he’s able to sympathize with the gur and acknowledge what he’s done to them as well as what they did to him.

[squipdop]

okay i know we're all still recovering from the wink but. what did they mean by this. what did they MEAN by this. the baby oil. AGAIN?

[video description: a clip from Baldur's Gate 3 Cast play D&D #1.

neil newbon (astarions VA and player) turns to tim downie (gales VA and player): "you're not going to like this." (laughter)

tim: "oh no"

neil: "so what im thinking-"

tim: "not again"

neil: "im thinking-"

mark hulmes (dungeon master, offscreen): "hes got the baby oil again."

tim: "oh no" (laughter)

neil (starting to rub tims back): "ease the tension darling"

end video description.]

[spaceyqueer]

Mizora sucks ass and she should be treated with the same contempt that Cazador is by both canon and the fandom, but her abuse is minimised because she's a hot gaslight girlboss, not a racist Asian stereotype (remember when Cazador had a moustache?), and her victim is a black man and people's sympathy evaporates when they have to apply it to a black character.

[saremina]

so who else thinks that after the first romance scene (specifically if you get it with high approval before the party) Astarion stays up all night just waiting for something horrible to happen because this is the point where Cazador always takes his partner away so surely that must happen now as well, even if logically he knows nothing is going to happen.

the sun coming up with nothing bad happening must've been such a relief. for the first time in 200 years him sleeping with someone wasn't a death sentence.

no wonder he becomes so fixated with protecting Tav (and Durge especially, considering the whole set of issues that they come with). this is the first person he didn't lead to their death by just sleeping with them. of course he's going to want to do anything and everything in his power to keep them safe because what if the death he always brings to his partners is just a little late this time?

(no wonder he insists on turning Tav into a vampire the moment he ascends because what better way to keep them safe than having complete control over them? dealing with your issues is of course not an option)

[itwasabeautifulwebbing]

baldur’s gate 3 really is the game of all time for the gays who want to celebrate both sad pathetic wet men AND women’s wrongs

[wolfywolfy]

Obsessed with the fact that dnd Elves have canonical Soulmate bonds and almost nobody knows it or utilizes it in Astarion and/or Halsin fics

"red string au" "fated mates au" guess what besties. ur favorite trope is built in!!!!!

The best part is it's dnd so it literally doesn't even matter if ur tav is an Elf or not. U can make Thiramin whatever u want it to be. It can even be a temporary soul bond (bc that is A Thing!!!) to add to angst if u wanted. So much potential!!

[twinktor-frankenstein]

Neil Newbon is so talented, he can go from being my silly little girlfriend to the most annoying motherfucker ever so fast

[mossy-rot]

peak character creation is making a guy that fucks severely but also making him an absolute loser. just a guy serving cunt and failure

[invinciblerodent]

going slightly feral today for characters who don't think of themselves as being "~into~" touch and physical intimacy suddenly discovering that they actually are, in like an embarrassingly huge way

"oh fine, I'll indulge you, but I'll have you know that I'm not exactly cuddly, darling. 🙄" (proceeds to wrap themselves around their partner in their sleep like a boa constrictor) (yes this becomes a regular occurrence)

"no dear, I don't like hugs" (does, in fact, melt into each embrace with a soft sigh and eyes sliding shut, all gooey inside like a person-shaped fudge brownie)

"how juvenile. I'm not ticklish, I'm not a child. 😒" (starts convulsing with stifled laughter if their partner as much as wiggles their fingers in their general direction) (no they are very cool I promise)

"don't touch me 😒" (secretly pouts when their explicit wish is respected. no wait come back i didn't mean don't as in don't, i meant it as try harder. yes i know that's counterintuitive. no you should read my mind exactly. how is that even hard--)

"*makes a longing 🥺 face every time their partner is doing something just out of their reach, wanting to touch them but not wanting to come off as ~needy~*" (scoffs and turns away when asked if they want a hug) ((that means "yes please"))

"ugh, fine, but if you ruin my hair--" (all but tears up at having their scalp gently scratched. finds that they do not give a solitary shit about their hair now, actually.) (yes, they will now regularly plop their head in their partner's lap as a silent request for scritches. they're not cuddly, though.)

will not hold hands. will, however, knock shoulders while walking. (it means try again. it means please never stop trying.)

[y-rhywbeth2]

@leomonae Hmm. Were [judges] always chosen from the ranks of the patriars, even 200 years back?

That's actually a good point that I failed to factor in and just had to go research - the only aspect of it I'd considered prior was the fact that the new money minority amongst the Peers wouldn't count in this equation (whether Astarion would be from a Patriar family, and thus require human ancestry to make sense in the lore) because he died long before they were established. (I was also incorrect about lawyers: barristers are a rare (and insanely expensive to hire) minority within the city, though from what else I've seen on the topic of lawyers in the realms that is a very new evolution. As Astarion says himself though; he was a judge, he made rulings.)

By default the role of judge is performed by the Dukes, when a crime is too serious and under dispute (or a Patriar, or somebody in similar power (*cough*high ranking temple clergy*cough*) wants it taken to court) and can't be settled by officers of the Fist or the Watch. Within the Gate's legal system it's rare for a case to require a magister to rule on it, so there's not much call for judges in the first place. Rule of thumb: you just go straight to jail… or the gallows! Hm, I'm suddenly reminded of Angelo sentencing the party back in BG1: "I am commander of the Flaming Fist. I will be your judge, jury and executioner, pardon the cliché."

In the 15th century the Dukes may delegate to a member of the Parliament of Peers, but that itself raises some questions because the Peers exist because the Patriars saw an opportunity to grab power and took it*, and this power was not delegated… so it's quite possible that when Astarion was alive you had to be a Grand Duke to serve as a judge. Grand Duke Ancunín! The Gate is doomed. (I somehow don't think Astarion was ever a duke, I think that would've come up at some point.)

*"Hand all the power over the nobility". Even before the Peers the Patriars were using their money and influence - Dukes were voted for, and democracy held sway, but the nobility are still happy to try and game the system, though they weren't as successful before they could overrule the Council of Four. Nowadays they're doing it with the Peers, who will have a handful of non-Patriar members that got in by having money and (trades) Guild and Patriar connections. Dalyria, I have always mistrusted you even before finding out you were experimenting on 12 year olds, and I am staring very suspiciously at you right now. What were your connections, doctor? (The part of the systems that aren't rigged by the Patriars are usually rigged by the Flaming Fist.)

However there's nothing concrete about legal systems in the Gate in the late 13th century that I can find, only information for the 15th. So if you don't like the idea of Astarion being a Patriar here's your grounding (Which tbh, I don't necessarily like it. I see him as new money for some reason.) He would need connections and money for one of the city rulers to known him to declare him a proxy judge, if they did that back then (which, again, suggests Patriar), but there's nothing textual here to say anything concrete or say anyone's wrong.

Another tidbit of information: you don't get paid for sitting in as a judge unless you're taking bribes from interested parties. It is not a career, it's an occasional hobby. "I was a magister" = "Sometimes people bribed me to decide who lives and who dies and I probably decided based on the highest bidder and/or who was less likely to shank me for making this ruling."

[voidsp00ks]

Oh to be such a broken monster and yet loved by so so many. Pretty face and pretty words but that's not why you can't help but romance him every damn playthrough.

You love him because he deserves to be loved.

And maybe, as a broken monster, you hope loving him will make it easier as you learn to love yourself.

[swordmaid]

much thoughts about shri’iia only knowing the most basic of common (like yes/no/what/hello) when she gets dropped off in the surface so she ends up learning from the companions mostly gale bc in turn she probably teaches him common drowic and MUCH thoughts about astarion eventually being the one who teaches her bc they spend a lot of time together at night (since they don’t need sleep) and that’s soooooo tangled rapunzel to me sharing a book together and he teaches her basic phrases and how to read common. like shri’iia knowing key words in common like kill or die so he’s like ok here’s how you say kill yourself 🤭 and she parrots it back to him, kys! then he cackles bc he’s teaching her the most diabolical funny shit and she just says it back. but eventually he stops treating it like a game (like after she drew his scar for him) and he teaches her proper. at night when everyone is asleep they read a book together and he tries his best to teach her what it says —I also imagine they mind link often bc if he can’t describe it properly he can at least show her, and she’s like slowly learning how to speak common through him.

that’s also part of the accidentally falling in love 🫵 bit