#yeah you can criticise the writing if you want

[moonlit-orchid]

good evening to everyone except a certain few fucking anons

[alotofpockets]

Hard launch | Florence Pugh x Singer!Reader

Where you and Florence hard launch your relationship and your new album

A/n: faceclaim for this is Florence as Taylor Swift and Reader as Gracie Abrams

Marvel masterlist | Words: 2.6k

-----

Over the past few months you have been all over the world. Your world tour started out in America and after a little break, you had continued to the European leg of the tour. While you loved touring, performing, and spending time with your fans, you craved the feeling of home. 

There were multiple places in the world that you called home. But only one of them was a constant, and you were about to walk into her arms, as you turned the keys to open her front door.

As soon as you opened the door, your girlfriend was in your arms. “Hi baby, I’ve missed you so much.” You whisper into her shoulder as you hold her close. “Why didn’t you say you were coming home today? I would’ve picked you up.” Your girlfriend had been at a couple of your shows, but since she was on set for most of your tour, your schedules didn’t often line up. 

You still had a few shows left in London, but you had the weekend off before you were performing 6 shows at Wembley. “I wanted to surprise you.” You leave your bags at the door as she pulls you into the home. Both your jobs required you to be in different parts of the world often, that’s why you decided that instead of moving into one of your houses, you just moved in together and kept both your places. Meaning that you shared her home in London, and yours in Los Angeles. 

After catching up for a bit, during which you lay cuddled up together on the couch, you told her you had really missed her food, with all the simple and easy meals you had during the tour. “Well, I was planning on filming a Cooking with Flo, so you are in luck, my love.” 

She was getting the ingredients laid out, while you set up her camera for her. You had been there from the start of her Cooking with Flo series, where she would film little videos on her phone and post them to her instagram story. You had been in London for work when covid hit, and you weren’t able to travel back to the US. There weren’t a lot of people that you knew who lived in London, except Florence who you had met a couple weeks prior, you shot her a message and moved in with her the same week.

The difference a couple of years could make. The two of you went from strangers, to roommates, to best friends, and finally to lovers. Florence her cooking show had also expanded. No more wobbly iPhone uploads to her Instagram story, but proper camera setup on a tripod and streaming the show live on YouTube.

“You know how I’ve been having special guests on the show?” You nodded. Even when you were away you kept up with her cooking videos. “Would you want to join me tonight?” The two of you kept your relationship away from the public, though many people had their suspicions, neither one of you had ever spoken out about it. 

That’s why Flo fully expected you to say no to her questions, but you surprised her by saying yes. “Really?” She asked excitedly. “Yes really. We can give them a little teaser for what’s to come, right?”

You had been working on a new album, where you wanted to put focus on what fame had been like for you. The way that everything you did was criticised by the media. That had been one of the reasons that you and Florence kept your relationship away from the public. 

Over the years you have hidden not only your relationship, but also parts of yourself. When you were younger it felt like something you just had to live with now, but you didn’t want to anymore. You wanted to be yourself and not care what people thought, and your next album would be the first step.

“Alright, ready to go whenever you are.” Florence says once she has checked everything over one last time. “Yeah, let me just finish this post and then I’ll be ready.” Your girlfriend walked over and leaned on your shoulders and watched you write the little caption you were giving your post from the last show.

-----

y/n_y/l/n just posted

y/n_y/l/n: Thank you to everyone that came out last night, it was an honour to play in front of a crowd like you! I can't believe we are nearing the end of the European leg, this tour has been amazing so far, and that is all thanks you x

-----

You put your phone away and set up the laptop for the livestream. A little countdown started counting down a minute while Florence got ready behind the kitchen island. You turned on the camera and waited to the side waiting for Florence to introduce you.

The countdown on the screen ticked down and Florence got ready to start. “It’s Cooking with Flo, bitches! Today we’re joined by a very special guest. You’ve been asking for this for a while now, and I have finally convinced her to join me. Please welcome Y/n to the show!”

You stepped up beside her. “Hi everyone! I’m so excited to be here.” You spoke nervously. Florence chuckled lightly, you were used to performing in front of thousands of people, but standing in front of this camera got you nervous. “I am so glad you’ve finally agreed to come on the show. Do you want to tell them what we’re cooking?”

“Yeah, for sure. We are making truffle pasta with one of Florence's own recipes today, and I for one cannot wait to try it.” Florence laughed, “But before we get to that part, we will show you exactly how to make it.”

Florence explained every step to the camera and you followed her lead on what to do. The conversation flowed easily between the two of you, the familiar banter making it feel like it was just another evening at home. A sense of familiarity you’ve been missing so dearly while you have been on tour.

She handed you a whisk and told you to mix up the ingredients you had just put in the bowl to make the sauce. Out of the two of you, Florence was definitely the one cooking most of the time, she was amazing and you were.. Well you were nearly decent. 

“Careful there,” Florence teased, “we don’t want the sauce all over the kitchen.” You laughed at your hand covered with the sauce, because it had definitely gone over the edge of the bowl. “No? I thought you were wanting to redecorate the kitchen. This seems like the perfect colour for the walls.” You joke back.

While your cooking and playful banter went on, the chat was blowing up with comments. Many of them were excited about seeing the two of you together and noting the chemistry that was evident on the screen.

You stayed on the easy tasks while Florence did all the hard work, but neither one of you minded, you were just enjoying the time you were able to spend together. 

With the pasta and the sauce presented on two plates, you thought the dish was done. “It smells so good, I cannot wait to taste it!” You already reached for a fork, but Florence stopped you. “Hold on, it’s not done yet.” She grabbed a truffle and the grater and got to work.

With the most serious expression, Florence delicately shaved the truffle over the pasta, her concentration made you giggle. “What’s so funny?” She asked with a raised eyebrow. “It’s just that you look like you’re performing surgery on that truffle.” You have to try hard to hold back your laughter.

“This is art, okay?” You don’t just throw truffles around.” You burst out laughing, unable to contain it any longer. Her serious tone combined with the silly way of putting on the truffle fully sends you over the edge.

“Hey, this is important stuff!” Florence tried hard to stay in her serious character, but failed as she watched the tears spring in your eyes from your laughter. “Truffles are a very delicate matter!” She got out through her own giggles.

You doubled over, clutching your stomach, and before you knew it, you had collapsed onto the kitchen floor, laughing uncontrollably. “Oh no, we’ve lost her!” Florence exclaimed, setting down the truffles on the counter to check on you. “I think I've broken Y/n.”

Florence always had the ability to make you laugh, but right now she got you so far that you could barely breathe, and the tears were streaming down your face. Florence snapped a quick picture before turning to the camera again. “Don’t worry, I will share that with you later. Now, let’s try this pasta.” 

You stood up as you were wiping your tears. “Wait for me! I wanna try.” Both of you take a bite at the same time. “Oh my god, this is so good!” Florence smiled proudly. “You heard it here first, people, you can even impress mega pop stars with this meal, so try it out at home.” You rolled your eyes playfully, “Food easily impresses me, but you should definitely try this recipe, because this was delicious.”

“And that’s all we have for tonight. We are going to enjoy this meal and soon Y/n will head to Wembley for her final shows of her Europe tour. Thank you for watching, and I’ll see you next time!” You both wave to the camera before it shuts off.

“I’ve missed you so much.” You say as you walk into her arms. “No one can make me laugh as much as you do.” She held you tight while telling you she missed you as well. 

"I can't believe we did that. The fans are going to lose their minds." Florence says as she walks both your plates over to the dining table. You smiled, feeling a warmth in your chest as you looked at her. "I think we just gave them something to remember." Florence smiled and leaned in to kiss your cheek. "And this is just the beginning, my love."

-----

florencepugh just posted

florencepugh: An all new Cooking with Flo out with special guest Y/n Y/l/n! Watch how she takes a break from her tour to spend some time on my floor 😂

Load more comments

y/n_y/l/n: In my defense, the floor was very comfortable

-----

Your next few shows in London were incredible. A sold out Wembley night after night, was something you didn’t even dare to dream of a few years back. But now you were playing your sixth and final sold out Wembley show of this tour.

Nervous was an understatement. You had announced things on tour before, but this, this was something on an entirely different level. While your piano was being set up on the stage you talked with your fans. 

“Most of you have been with me for a very long time, and have stuck with me through the many changes I have gone through as a person and with my music, and that is something I am eternally grateful for. The support I get from each and everyone of you, is what gives me the strength to evolve.” 

While you were still nervous, you also felt a sense of serenity. The fans in the stadium were excited even when they had no clue what was coming.

“Growing up in the spotlight for me came with a lot of negativity. Something I haven’t spoken about often. It has made me hide parts of my life, parts that no one should have to hide.” 

You didn’t think you’d get this emotional, but you had to wipe a tear that had started rolling down your cheek.

“I decided that I no longer want to hide these parts of me to make other people happy. I am the one that should be able to share my happiness, and that is something I’ve been working on this past year. I’ve taken a deep dive into what fame has been like for me, the struggles, and the things that I’ve had to hide away.”

You paused for a moment, taking in the crowd that was listening to your every word. The people that have allowed you to continue to make music. The people that loved you unconditionally, no matter what the media had put out about you. The people that have defended your honour again and again.

“All of that, I’ve put it into something that I am very proud of.” The noise of the crowd grew with anticipation. “And I cannot wait to share it with you… so I won’t! New music coming soon on my next album "The Secret of Us.” 

The screen filled with the announcement and the crowd went insane. You stood there basking in the love the fans were throwing your way. The clapping didn’t stop for minutes. You sat down on the stage, looking up at the audience with tears in your eyes.

You got up again, because you weren’t done yet. “And if you’ll let me, I would love to perform one of the songs from the album for you tonight.” You smiled as they cheered even louder. 

“This song is called Close To You, and it’s one of the most meaningful songs I have ever written. The reason that it is so meaningful is because it’s about someone who means the world to me. This person has been so supportive of me throughout my career, they are a big part of my happiness. The things I want to let you be a part of from now on.”

There really was no turning back anymore, that made you extra nervous, but also excited, you didn’t want to turn back, you only wanted to move forward.

“Performing this song with me tonight, as well as on the album, is my girlfriend Florence Pugh. Please welcome her to the stage!”

You watched as she walked onto the stage in her yellow dress, a big smile on her face as she waved to the crowd who was loudly cheering.

You started playing the first chords to the song as Florence made her way to the microphone stand that was just placed next to your piano for her.

I don't got a single problem with provocative See the bodies, how they burn, it's just the way it is Smoky, dark, crowded room, I need nothing Under pink light in June 

You start singing, while making eye contact with your girlfriend, who started strumming the guitar. 

I was so cool, but then, all of a sudden You saw me look at you Florence joined you in the next verse, like you had practised so many times.

I burn for you And you don't even know my name If you asked me to I'd give up everything To be close to you

The two of you continued singing until the final verse. It was just you singing the final part.

You should be mine for life, I'll be signing Every dotted line Chemical override, ultraviolet You could be mine tonight

The crowd went absolutely crazy and you could not believe that you had just done that and gotten instant support from thousands of fans. Florence looked at you with nothing but pride as she opened her arms for you.

You hug her, “I am so proud of you.” She tells you loud enough for you to hear over the cheering. In response you grab her face and place a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you.” With tears falling down your cheeks you turn to the audience and wave and thank them too.

Florence left the stage again and you continued performing the rest of your set like nothing happened, though internally you felt amazing.

-----

florencepugh just posted

florencepugh: Incredibly proud of you, always. Thank you for letting me be a part of this amazing album, I cannot wait for the world to hear your briliance.

Load more comments

-----

After a couple more songs you closed off the show by thanking the fans over and over again. “You’ve made this tour incredible, I will never forget the memories we’ve made here. Thank you!”

The moment you get backstage, Florence flies into your arms. “You did it, my love!” 

-----

y/n_y/l/n just posted

y/n_y/l/n: What a way to end this leg of the tour. I am incredibly thankful for all of your support, and cannot wait to share my new album with you soon! And Florence, thank you for being my biggest supporter though it all 🫶🏻

Load more comments

florencepugh: So proud of you 🫶🏻

fan1: New music and a new favourite ship? that was not on my bingo card

fan2: The hardest of hard launches

fan3: AAAHHHH

-----

y/n_y/l/n_updates just posted

y/n_y/l/n_updates: Y/n and Florence Pugh after performing their love song from Y/n's upcoming album.

Load more comments

fan1: They are so cute!

fan2: I want what they have

fan3: So happy she finally doesn't care anymore. All the best to them

-----

💗 If you enjoyed this fic, please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging! You can also supporting me by leaving a tip 💗

[famwhy]

Inconsistent

Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse

Hobie Brown X F!Reader

Synopsis: In which, Hobie Brown confuses the shit out of you.

Note: following up on my last post, here is how I would write Hobie's speech patterns.

"What are you doin' up 'ere?"

Your lids fluttered open, eyes flitting to the side.

He stood there, hands stuffed in those ridiculously high pockets you always criticised with a click of your tongue; criticisms he would respond to with a light, airy laugh that never failed to melt your insides and turn you into a pile of mush.

The glow of the billboard lit him up, coating his silhouette in a warm orange that complimented him so well—bringing out his piercing, dark eyes in ways you had only ever dreamt of.

"I just felt like the ground was getting a little boring." You shrugged, forcibly tearing your gaze away from his intoxicating form to bring it back to the twinkling city below you.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Your peripheral caught the sight of those familiar, heavy boots appearing out of nowhere to swing beside your own and, all of a sudden, the bustle of the sparkling street below you was the least of your worries.

Ultimately, you found your eyes trailing back up to his form—breath hitching in your throat as you gazed at him once again.

He was close; much closer than usual. His knees were practically touching your own and the piercings that littered his face glinted under your gaze. Half-lidded eyes stared back at you—a smirk sly enough to make you gulp situated on his handsome face.

"What you sayin'?"

"Hm?" You blinked.

"C'mon, love, I know when some'in's goin' on in that pre'y likkle head of yours." His leg nudged against your own, instantly sending warm tingles through your whole body. "You can chat to me; 'bout anything. You know that."

You almost couldn't help the fond smile that stretched across your lips at his words. "Yeah, I know."

Hobie had always been tender and caring; sweet and kind. He knew exactly what to say, when to say it, and how to put it. It was one of the reasons why your legs turned to jelly when around him; one of the many reasons why he absolutely floored you.

He was just so vocal about everything he believed in—held such strong opinions that he was never afraid of voicing out; that he would yell and scream at the top of his lungs about—you had almost found yourself envious of his confidence.

Even his clothes were loud; bold and so incredibly out there. You couldn't ignore his presence even if you wanted to—

—and to be honest, you never really did want to.

"How's the youngen?"

"He's fine, still on my arse about not needing his big sis to coddle him—" you rolled your eyes, "—how're yours?"

"They're 'opeless," snickered the guy, "man's out 'ere lookin' at 'er like she's the only person in the world and they're still not together."

He threw his hands up in his exasperation and you found yourself giggling slightly—you always did at his antics, no matter how ridiculous.

"...what about you?"

He rose a brow. "What about me?"

"You, uh, you have anyone you're thinking about that way?" A sudden rush of nervousness hit you all at once and you found yourself wondering why exactly you decided to open your damn mouth. "Y'know, like a— a girlfriend or something?"

"I don't believe in labels."

He said it—plain and simple—and your heart felt like it shattered in your chest, pieces of broken shards getting stuck to your insides to sting you even further.

"Oh..."

He didn't believe in labels. You probably weren't even on the list of potential lovers for him. Of course, how could you have let yourself hope for anything more?

"There's this one girl though."

You blinked, the rapidly growing pool of salty water in your eyes being desperately put to a halt. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. She's a nice one—nice personali'y—" he placed one arm against the rough stone of the building, leaning in so close, you could feel the light puffs of his breath against your skin, "—'m thinking of goin' for it."

You wanted to be mad at him, to loathe him for liking another girl while you were so obviously head over heels for him—but in that moment, all you could focus on were his lips and the shockingly short amount of distance between them and your own.

Your heart was beating right out of your chest and you were just so confused. Here he was, talking to you about some girl he was interested in; shattering your heart in a million pieces like some worthless, glass vase—and then he was somehow making the useless shards continue to beat pathetically at just his proximity right after he broke them.

He was just so—

"Mm?!"

Your eyes widened a little, disbelief rendering you unable to move; to respond to the sudden feeling of lips on your own—of his lips on your own.

You. He was talking about you.

Warmth bubbled inside of you—coating your whole form in a lovely sheen of bliss—and soon, your lids fluttered shut as you pushed back against him—reciprocating his passion with your own.

The kiss was sweet and tender, but it soon grew into something more than that. His arm wound around your waist as soon as you kissed back, pulling you flush up against his form and allowing you to feel the heat of his body against your own.

Your fingers made their way to his wild locks, tugging on them as you felt his hands trail down, landing on your arse and pulling you onto his lap—as though just having you right up against him wasn't enough; as though he had to have you closer.

The electricity that ran through your body was enough to coax a smile out of you—one you knew he could feel through the kiss; that you hoped he would reciprocate with just as much love.

And he did, pulling away to rest his forehead against your own—dazed, half-lidded eyes staring straight at you with a mixture between a suggestive smirk and a genuinely joyful smile on his face.

You almost forgot to breathe as you looked at him with just as many pink clouds littered in your gaze—just as much adoration written clearly in your eyes.

"How about it, love?" He asked against your lips, "wanna be mine?"

You giggled dreamily, almost like a little school girl with a crush. "I thought you didn't believe in labels?"

"I don't believe in consistency."

It was official—

—Hobie Brown was the most confusing man you had ever met.

[throwawayhero]

could you give more hcs or a drabble about bakugou with a crush on reader!! pls i feel like ur fics are the closest ive seen to canon... i need more

No problem, and thanks! I try to make them seem canon, but sometimes it's difficult T-T. Just realising now that a few of these sound stalker-y and I'm sorta regretting writing this but oh well. I hope this is satisfactory!! c/w; social media au, buzzfeed, eminem (idek), karaoke, not proof read

!Katsuki who unintentionally catches himself playing with his hair while talking to you. Not in an obvious way (that's what he thinks at least), but more so absentmindedly fiddling with his side burns and such. It's kinda funny when he accidentally curls them and leaves them like that for a while. He also has a habit of playing with his baby hairs on the back of his neck.

!Katsuki who "accidentally" managed to copy your handwriting style down stroke for stroke? He doesn't really know how it happened, to be honest. He just noticed it one day during a group project after Jirou pointed it out to the two of you. You found it funny, but he found it outrageous and claimed that you had been the one to copy his handwriting.

!Katsuki who allowed you to tag along on one of Kirishima's and his study sessions. He beat the shit out of Eijirou and was gentle with you, more or less. He wouldn't hit you of course, but he certainly wasn't scared to yell. At least the first time. The look you gave him made him writhe with guilt, so he shut the fuck up out of embarrassment.

!Katsuki who heard you talking about a band you loved and decided it was his god given right to go through their whole discography and criticise it in his own time. But turns out, you have good taste, so he keeps to himself about it. "Accidentally" bought a spare ticket to their next concert and offered the spot to you. No big deal, right?

!Katsuki who did extensive searching for your socials, scrolling through his friends friends following, mutuals, and genuinely just word of mouth. When he did find your accounts, he stalked the SHIT out of them. When you requested to follow him, he freaked out and accepted straight away. He didn't follow you back until a week later, "just to be safe".

!Katsuki who unironically took one of those "Do I have a crush on my friend?" quizzes when he started to feel things towards you. 100% went down a rabbit hole on buzzfeed. He wanted to call his "crush" ANYTHING other than what it was. Mentioned it to Kirishima once and was left even ore confused than what he had originally been.

Unrelated but he just looks like he would listen to Eminem. Probably gets a good chuckle out of the whole "You gonna cancel me, yeah? Gen Z me brah?!" thing. Don't ask me to explain why I think this, it just makes sense.

!Katsuki who more often than not is watching you out of the corner of his eye. Not in an overly-creepy way, he's just "aware of his surroundings". He says that to anyone that mentions it, which is literally just his paranoia.

!Katsuki who secretly loved the fact that you hung out with him and his friends almost daily. Because then he wouldn't have to initiate hangouts and look as desperate as he really was. It gave him a plausible excuse to absorb every single opinion you uttered. It gave him an excuse to get even closer to you.

!Katsuki who freaked the FUCK out when everyone (besides the two of you) got sick and couldn't do the bi-weekly hangout everyone had played a part in organising. The group had settled on doing karaoke, so you can imagine how it went down with just the two of you there. Although, the two of you did make an amazing duet. (No one was really sick, Mina just mentioned Katsuki's behaviour and put 2 and 2 together. She also wanted to see if he would take initiative for once.)

!Katsuki who went out of his way to make changes to his hero costume that he knew you would like. Small details here and there, for both style and practicality. While it was cold he would use the neck warmer to hide the smirk that creeped onto his face when he saw you checking out his new look. He also started to make himself look nicer in general, indulging in a bit of jewellery (stud earrings, a ring or two, and a silver necklace), nicer shoes, wearing the uniform properly and such.

!Katsuki who has your number pinned in his contacts, as well as giving you your own message & ring tone sound. He has everyone but you, Kirishima, and his parents on silenced. He also has your contact saved as a nickname he assigned you without you knowing with a heart emoji. It's simple, but endearing.

[onlinesuzie]

☆ hamzah vs. watching love island ☆

words: 2.3k

summary: Hamzah has always found Love Island embarrassing an unrealistic but on a warm summers evening spent pouring drinks and binging the show with Martin and Mandy, Hamzah’s disdain for Love Island changes when he has the opportunity to ‘pull you for a chat’.

notes: GUYS I LOVE LOVE ISLAND SO BAD and martin and mandy mentioning it on ooc inspired me to write this!!

♡

It was one of those lazy summer evenings at Mandy’s house, where the air was thick with warmth and your favourite part of the summer was about to begin. You, Mandy, and Martin had gathered in the living room, ready for your weekly tradition of binge watching that week’s episodes of Love Island. The show was a guilty pleasure for the three of you, a chance to unwind and indulge in the drama and romance unfolding on the screen.

You thought it was stupid but some part of you wanted that cheesy romance, the type where you just make out for no reason or just anything. It had been months since you had even kissed someone let alone all the borderline soft porn you laugh at with Mandy and Martin. But regardless of how much action you were getting, alcohol and snacks were scattered across the coffee table, and you were nestled comfortably on the couch next to your friends.

The night was in full swing, and the alcohol kept flowing. The more you drank, the funnier the islanders’ antics appeared. You, Mandy, and Martin were laughing loudly, making bets on who would be kicked off next, and sipping your drinks between comments.

As the opening credits rolled for the Wednesday’s episode, Hamzah wandered into the room, his expression one of mild disdain. “I still don’t understand how you guys can watch this shit,” he remarked, folding his arms and leaning against the doorway.

“Fuck,” you thought. Maybe it was the alcohol or the grossly horny scenes you’d been watching for the past few hours, but Hamzah looked incredible. He looked so good, with his biceps straining against the fabric of his loose shirt and his hair falling casually over his warm brown eyes.

Mandy rolled her eyes playfully. “Oh, come on, Hamzah. It’s fun! Besides, you don’t have to watch it with us, you just like to complain.”

Martin grinned, tossing a piece of popcorn at Hamzah. “Yeah, man, just let us have our fun. You’re always free to join us if you want.”

Hamzah dodged the popcorn with a chuckle, shaking his head. He approached the three of you and leaned against the back of the couch, his arms looking impressively defined in the artificial blue light. You found it hard to focus on the show as you admired how good he looked. “I think I’ll pass,” he said, releasing his grip on the couch and gesturing toward the TV as he made eye contact with Martin. “This whole thing is just so… fake. Who behaves like that when they actually like someone?”

You couldn’t suppress a smile at Hamzah’s typical response. It was a long-standing joke among your group that he was the self-appointed critic of all things reality television. It made sense; the thought of Hamzah behaving like the guys on Love Island was a bit unsettling. You had never seen him with a girl before, and while Martin mentioned that Hamzah had dated in the past, none of those girls had ever made an appearance since you’d known him.

Mandy laughs at him, “You don’t even know what that’s like Hamzah, you don’t even know how to talk to women let alone have the opportunity to pull someone for a chat”

“I could, but whatever, it doesn’t matter cause this isn’t what dating is like” Hamzah criticised.

“Suit yourself,” you teased, glancing over at him. “But you’re missing out on some quality entertainment.”

Hamzah’s eyes met yours, and for a moment, you could see how warm and inviting his eyes were, his thick eyelashes, the deep brown colour. He opened his mouth to say something but seemed to think better of it, shaking his head with a smile. “I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me. Enjoy your show.”

As he walked away, you felt this disappointment of him leaving. Over the months, you couldn’t deny how attracted you were to Hamzah, and maybe it was just the alcohol speaking but he looked gorgeous tonight, and every interaction with him seemed to intensify the emotions you tried so hard to keep in check.

The evening progressed with the usual mix of laughter and commentary, and the frequent refills of your drinks. Mandy and Martin were engrossed in the latest drama between the islanders, while you found your thoughts drifting back to Hamzah. You could hear him moving around in the kitchen, and the low hum of his voice as he hummed a tune. The alcohol in your system made you feel bolder, more aware of your surroundings, and undeniably drawn to Hamzah.

Eventually, a commercial break gave you an excuse to get up and stretch your legs. “I’m going to grab another drink,” you announced, making your way to the kitchen with slightly tipsy movements.

Hamzah looked up as you entered, a teasing smile playing on his lips. “Taking a break from the love triangle drama?”

“Something like that,” you replied, leaning against the counter. “I needed a breather. And maybe some real conversation as you would say.”

He chuckled, passing you a glass of water. “I can definitely offer that. How are you holding up?”

“Good, just the usual work stuff,” you said, taking a sip. “And you? How’s everything going with the channel?”

“Busy as always,” he said, running a hand through his curls. “But I love it. Keeps me distracted.”

As you watched him, you couldn’t help but notice how beautiful he looked tonight. His dark curls framed his face perfectly, and his eyes sparkling with the dim lighting making your heart warm to him more. Was it the alcohol making you see him in this romantic light, or had you always felt this way?

There was a moment of comfortable silence, the kind that often fell between you two. It was in these moments that you felt closest to him, the quiet allowing for an unspoken connection to surface.

“You know,” you began, your voice dropping to a more playful tone, “you’re missing out on all the fun out there. Maybe you should join us and see what all the fuss is about.”

Hamzah looked a little taken aback by your forwardness, his cheeks coloring slightly. “I don’t know if I’d call it fun,” he said, scratching the back of his neck nervously. “But I guess I could sit with you guys for a bit.”

You stepped closer to him, feeling emboldened by the drinks you’d had. “I think you’d enjoy it more than you think,” you said, your voice soft and teasing moving closer to Hamzah.

Hamzah’s eyes widened slightly, and he seemed at a loss for words. “Maybe… maybe I’ll give it a try,” he stammered, his usual confidence momentarily shaken by your proximity.

You smiled, taking another sip of your drink. “Good. It’s always more fun with you around, Hamzah.”

Before he could respond, the sound of Mandy calling your name from the living room broke the moment. “Come on, we’re missing the show!”

You gave Hamzah one last playful look before turning to leave. “Think about it,” you said over your shoulder as you made your way back to the couch.

As you settled back in with Mandy and Martin, you couldn’t help but glance back towards the kitchen, where Hamzah stood, looking a little dazed but undeniably intrigued. The night continued with the usual banter and laughter, but now, there was an unspoken tension between you and Hamzah.

The chatter of Mandy and Martin filled the living room as you huddled on the couch, eyes glued to the chaotic drama of Love Island. The alcohol coursing through your veins loosened your inhibitions and heightened your senses. Each moment spent watching the ridiculous antics on-screen only made you think of Hamzah, who had just slipped into the kitchen for a drink.

You couldn’t help but admire him from afar. The way his dark curls fell effortlessly around his face, the way his shirt clung to his frame just right—it was all mesmerizing. With every laugh that rang out from the room, you felt a flutter of excitement mixed with longing. It was as if the alcohol had amplified everything you felt for him, making him the most attractive person in the room.

Suddenly, Hamzah reappeared in the doorway, leaning casually against the frame. “Hey, can you come here for a second?” His voice broke through your thoughts, and you found yourself looking into his warm, inviting eyes.

“Me?” you asked, slightly surprised but undeniably intrigued. “What’s up?”

“Just something I wanted to show you,” he said, a playful smile tugging at his lips.

Your heart raced at the invitation, and you quickly excused yourself from the couch, making your way to the kitchen. As you stepped inside, the atmosphere shifted. It was just you and Hamzah, and the air was thick with unspoken tension.

“What did you want to show me?” you asked, leaning against the counter, feeling slightly tipsy but more confident by the alcohol.

Without answering, Hamzah closed the distance between you in a heartbeat. His hands found your waist as he pulled you closer, and before you could process what was happening, he leaned in and captured your lips with his. The kiss was sudden and electrifying, igniting a rush of warmth that spread through your body.

You melted against him, surprised at the intensity of his kiss and the urgency behind it. Hamzah’s lips moved against yours with a passionate hunger, his touch igniting every nerve in your body. As you responded, kissing him back, you felt your head spin, the world around you fading into nothingness. The kiss deepened, his hands roaming to the small of your back, pulling you even closer as if he never wanted to let go.

Your heart raced as you leaned into him, savoring the taste of his lips and the warmth radiating from his body. The moment felt electric, charged with all the unspoken feelings you had harbored for so long. Hamzah’s breath mingled with yours, creating a shared rhythm that left you breathless. You could feel the heat rising between you, the chemistry strong as you lost yourself in the kiss.

As the kiss continued, you tangled your fingers in his dark curls, deepening the connection, feeling every rush of adrenaline that came with it. Hamzah responded by pressing you against the counter, his body a reassuring weight against yours, grounding you in the midst of the overwhelming emotions swirling around you.

You pulled back for a moment, breathless, your foreheads resting together as you both gasped for air. The playful glint in his eyes now had a serious undertone, a depth of feeling that sent your heart racing all over again. “Wow,” he breathed, still trying to catch his breath. “I didn’t expect that.”

“Neither did I,” you admitted, feeling a giddy rush of exhilaration wash over you.

He smiled, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch sending shivers down your spine. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

“Really?” you asked, your heart soaring at his confession.

“Yeah,” he said, his gaze steady and sincere. “You’re beautiful, and I’ve been wanting to tell you for a while.”

Just then, the sound of Mandy calling from the living room broke the intimate atmosphere. “Hey! What’s taking so long in there?”

You exchanged a knowing look with Hamzah, both of you unable to suppress the smiles spreading across your faces.

“Guess we should get back before they wonder if we’re plotting something,” you said, reluctantly stepping away from him.

Hamzah nodded but lingered for a moment longer, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “Maybe we are,” he said teasingly, his voice low.

With one last shared smile, you turned and headed back into the living room, feeling the thrill of the kiss linger in the air. You settled back onto the couch next to Mandy and Martin, trying to focus on the screen while your heart raced with the memory of Hamzah’s lips on yours.

As he rejoined the group, Mandy immediately looked at him with a teasing grin. “What took you so long? Did you find the secret stash of snacks or something?”

Hamzah chuckled, glancing between you and your friends. “Just… got distracted,” he said, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment, a knowing smile playing on his lips.

Martin raised an eyebrow, clearly sensing something had shifted in the air. “Distracted, huh? Doing what, exactly?” he probed, a mischievous grin spreading across his face.

“Oh, you know, just talking,” Hamzah replied, his tone casual, but you could see a hint of nervousness in his demeanor.

Mandy smirked, nudging him playfully. “You two were in there long enough for a serious conversation. What happened!”

You felt your cheeks flush at the teasing, but Hamzah simply laughed it off, shrugging his shoulders. “Nothing major. Just catching up. “

As the teasing continued, you settled into the couch, the warmth of the moment still lingering between you and Hamzah. You could feel his presence beside you, the comfort of being near him made you blush. The electricity of your earlier kiss hung in the air, unspoken yet there.

In a bold move, you leaned into him, resting your head against his shoulder. To your delight, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you in closer. The warmth radiating from him made you feel safe and cherished, and you couldn’t help but smile.

Hamzah glanced down at you, his expression softening. “You okay?” he asked quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah,” you replied, looking up at him. “I’m really good, actually.”

He smiled back, his eyes shining with warmth. “Good,” he said softly.

As the episode of Love Island continued, you found yourself stealing glances at Hamzah, who seemed engrossed in the show. Yet, every time your eyes met, a silent understanding passed between you, you are going back to his house tonight.

[finniestoncrane]

OH BOY! How about Office Eddie nsfw headcanons? I love that dweeb at the office with a dark streak and honestly just want anything about him 💚

Dano!Riddler x Fem!Reader Headcanons oooooooooh yeah!! i've started writing a little outline for something like this but longer!! this is a good excuse to test some things out and see what works >:3c 🐀💚 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: voyeurism, pervert eddie, peeping tom, spying, non-consensual stuff, masturbation, unintentional cum swallowing

listen, employment in a nice office isn't all that common in gotham, and you're lucky you're not behind a bar serving sleazy wannabe rogues or hustling for what little money you can get, so you're willing to put up with your shy and quiet and kinda dweeby co-worker

but that's only because you have no idea about all the weird stuff he's up to...

eddie is smitten immediately by you, but he doesn't speak to you at all for the first two weeks you're sharing an office with him

it makes you a little uncomfortable, but he slowly warms up and offers you a hello and a goodbye

when he starts talking to you a bit more, it's about quite dark and deep subjects

it's almost like he's trying to guage your response to decide if you're a good person

or one of the people he goes on about, the undeserving masses

he's nice enough though, and you find that he's very helpful and willing to guide you with the tasks

and you quickly notice that he's far smarter than you, and is willing to hold himself accountable for your training

this seemingly kind gesture isn't selfless, however, it's actually his way of getting closer to you

and to have you depending on him for your job

it's not something you notice at first, if at all, but edward always offers to look your work over before passing it on to the bosses

he's changing it without you knowing though, making sure there are little mistakes that have you reprimanded

eddie delivers that bad news of course, and offers to show you how to fix your errors

you're so grateful that you hug him, or compliment him, and so he can hardly stop doing it

besides, the stupider you feel, the more you'll have to rely on him, and the more you'll view him as smart and wonderful

and in order to keep you thinking that, he'll criticise you sometimes

nothing too mean, not too obvious

but enough that he can see your pupils widening and your skin flushing when he does compliment you

"don't worry, i won't tell the bosses"

gosh, you owe him so much... maybe he'll cash in the favours someday

eddie has the keys to the office and he unlocks it every morning, since he's always there a lot earlier than you

you never question why, but it's so he can set things up

you wouldn't believe how many cameras are hidden in the little space you share

under the desk, in the toilet, in the stationary cupboard

and the work laptop he offered to set up for you?

the webcam is hacked, so he can watch you at home

because at a certain point, he can't stand not to be around you or to know what you're up to when you clock out for the day

and that includes when you leave the room to go to the toilet

he had to drill a hole in the wall of the cupboard between the office and the bathroom, just so he can keep an eye on you

and he finds his behaviour escalating, like an experiment to see how far he can go

it starts with him touching himself under his desk, rubbing his hands over his erection and trying to keep quiet

rubbing against you in the elevator, placing his hands on your shoulders as he stands behind you, staring down your blouse

asking you to reach up high or down low to watch the way your clothes move to expose you

messing with the ac, watching you sweat when it's too hot, watching your nipples harden when it's too cold

then he starts messing with the cables under his desk a lot, something with the wiring you don't understand

but it's an excuse to stare at your legs, trying to get a peek up your skirt

and then before you know it, your sweet coworker is masturbating into your coffee creamer

waiting to see if you can taste the difference, to see if you recognise him on your tongue

[noforkingclue]

Hey there! I’m back again with another request (only if you want to write it though!)

I was looking at the prompts you reblogged and thought that this one: "i know what having a crush feels like and this is nothing close..." "have you considered that it's because this is more than just a crush?" "stop talking." might be one that could work for either Tommy Shelby or Carmy from The Bear — whichever you feel it fits better with!!

I look forward to seeing who you choose! Thanks so much in advance if you choose to write it! 🥰

Of course I want to write this!!! I went with Carmy for this because the prompt gave me a chance to torture him slightly...

I hope you like the fic :)

Title: Misunderstandings

Prompt list: list

Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary, @byebyebreezywrites, @spngingerbread21, @layazul, @lov3vivian, @simonsbluee

“Thanks Syd,” you said as you shrugged on your coat, “I really appreciate this. I owe you one big time.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Syd said rolling her eyes but you could see the smile on your face, “you do owe me one.”

“Oi,” you paused just as you were about to leave, “where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

You looked over your shoulder and grinned at Richie. He gave you an unimpressed loo and tossed you a cloth.

“You going to fucking help us clear up or not?” he asked

“Can’t tonight.”

“I thought we’re a fucking team now?”

“Syd let me leave early as long as I come in early another day.”

You tossed the cloth back at him and Richie caught it onehanded.

“And also when did you actually help with closing?”

“I’m always here.” Richie said

“Sitting down and criticising our work isn’t ‘helping’. Now I’ve really got to be going.”

A chorus of goodbyes came from the others. You briefly made eye contact with Carmy and gave him a small smile. He quickly looked away and disappeared into the back. You felt a pang of sadness course through you. However, you didn’t have time to dwell on it. You were going to be late if you didn’t leave.

“So,” Richie turned to Syd after you had gone, “why the fuck was she allowed to leave early?”

“She didn’t say. Although it could be a date.”

A crash from the kitchen made everyone look over. Carmy stumbled out, face red when he realised that everyone was staring at him. The smirk of Richie’s face seemed to widen at the revelation of why Carmy had been hiding.

“A date,” Richie said, “well she kept that fucking quiet. Doesn’t she trust us?”

“Maybe it’s because it’s none of our fucking business.” Carmy said

“I thought you’d be interested in this, cousin.”

“Why the fuck would you think that?”

“With your massive fucking crush on her? Thought you’d want to know who your competition is.”

“I don’t have a fucking crush on her.”

Richie let out a snort of disbelief and Syd raised her eyebrows. A ripple of laughter rose from the others at Carmy’s denial.

“Nah,” Richie shook his head, “we can all fucking see it.”

“I know what having a crush feels like,” Carmy snapped, “and this is nothing close.”

“Have you considered that it’s because this is more than just a crush?” said Marcus

Carmy’s attention snapped over to Marcus who shrugged in acknowledgement.

“Shut up.” Carmy said but the words came out slightly choked

Immediately the rest of the staff burst out laughing. Richie tossed the cleaning cloth of Carmy and said,

“Then why the fuck don’t you go after her?”

“You think you’re in place to give him relationship advice?” said Tina

“And why the fuck can’t I?”

“She’s going on a date,” said Marcus, “You can’t do that when she’s about to see someone else.”

“She should’ve taken him here,” said Richie, “then you could see what you’re dealing with, cousin.”

“Why the fuck would she bring a date to work? That would be a shit date.” said Syd, “See, this is why we shouldn’t listen to you when it comes to these things.”

“Shut the fuck up!”

Carmy leant against the wall and ran a hand over his face as his staff dissolved into arguing. Was his feelings for you really that obvious? Clearly he hadn’t been doing as good of a job of hiding them as he originally thought.

“Besides, we don’t even know if she’s going on a date.” Syd’s voice echoed above the noise

“Wait, who’s going on a date and why didn’t anyone let me know about the gossip?”

Silence fell and everyone glanced towards the door. Carmy’s felt the blush slowly creep up his neck as the two of you locked gazes.

“Turns out my sister isn’t feeling well so we had to cancel our plans,” you said, “so I came back to pull my weight! So, who’s going to tell me what’s been going on?”

[bugsinshoes]

OKAYOKAYOKAYOAY SOOOOO

i CANNOT stop thinking about musical falls. GENUINELY. it rotted my brain. SO! i've spent a bit of time doodling and coming up with ideas for how BILL would be presented on stage.

firstly, we have 2-D Bill/Pre-Weirdmageddon Bill. the idea i had for this form is that we'd use a spotlight tinted with a yellow gel and on top of that there'd be a gobo (stencil) of Bill's triangular form.

(examples of how that'd look onstage)

pros- spotlights can effortlessly move around stage without physically interfering with actors, also it mirrors how in the show, he's limited to the mindscape and how he doesn't have a physical form yadda yadda yadda (you get my idea)

cons- not much movement/expression. also kind of a disembodied voice? Bill is very expressive so it'd be hard to showcase something like that on a cut out stencil of him.

ANOTHER IDEA (i just had now as i'm writing this): Bill projection !!

so, it'd be a projected image of Bill which would be able to be animated so THAT solves the issue of the previous idea. plus i'm sure there'd be a way to move the projection around the stage if needed.

uhhh anyways !! back to my original ideas !!!!

obviously everything i've just mentioned is for 2-D Bill, but HERE is where it gets exciting. when Bill gains his physical form during Weirdmageddon.

so, when Bill gains a physical form, i had 3 ideas:

IDEA 1- Lin Manuel Miranda as Bill.

now, in my previous post about musical falls, i was kind of /j ing the idea, but i think it'd be genuinely hilarious. imagine this, duing the whole musical, bill is this 2-dimensional projection, kinda eerie. makes you think "how is he gonna look once he gains a physical body?" then BOOM its Lin Manuel Miranda. obviously his costume would be a waistcoat and jacket combo (something similar to how i drew him in my past post) but yeah. that's really the only reason. it'd be funny. idk.

IDEA 2- Puppet Bill.

this Bill would be more canon-accurate, still in his triangle form, except he'd be puppeted by someone. now, this comes with the same problem as gobo-bill. LACK OF EXPRESSION. he's stuck to one emotion/"facial" expression. (also i have no idea how puppets work. if anyone with more knowledge than me wants to add on/constructively criticise, you're welcome to!) i didn't really expand/think too much about this idea either soooo.....

IDEA 3 (my favourite)-

drag. bill.

i really like this idea. now, i'm no costume designer, nor do i do drag (so apologies if i've gotten anything wrong) but i think this would be something really cool to see on stage. the shape language of the costume, alongside a gorgeous makeup look, AS WELL as it being a real person acting, really feels like a good direction to go in, as it would allow full movement, gestures, and expressions !! (hooray!!) also i really need to see an awesome Bill-inspired drag look onstage. it'd be awesome.

ANYWAYS THAT'S IT !! THOSE ARE MY IDEAS !!!

this is all for fun as i KNOW this won't ever become an IRL stage production (probably) but a guy can dream. i just had so much fun coming up with ideas for the heck of it sooo !!!

another MASSIVE thanks to @fordtato for making that video about musical falls. i think i'm obsessed.

AAAA THAT'S ALL !!!! :D

[angelaw-07]

Wish You could see me now Pt 1

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, swearing, arguments, a little smut, includes most BND members, appearance of Zico, exes to lovers, college au, I am not shipping any Kpop idols together.

Summary: As Han Dongmin slowly realises his mistake of losing you, he relishes the idea of going back. your dorm only a hallway away. Dongmin starts to make gentle and subtle gestures towards you and edges somewhat closer, hoping to regain the relationship he ended himself. But just as he thought things were going back to normal, a new guy showed up, cutting ties immediately between you two. Dongmin has to get you back, by fire and smoke.

Author's note: This is my first time writing on Tumblr or on any social website.. so please be lenient and don't criticise. THX.. :)

Fuck this. He noticed her laugh happily, intertwining her fingers with him. What's the point? If she can move on so quickly, why can't I?

Then

Taesan sat near the bathroom door, hearing your choked sobs and cries from inside. His heart clenched. He knew it was his fault, saying things he didn't actually mean. He wished he could embrace you and tell you that he wasn't serious. But the damage had already been done. "Y/n..?" Taesan spoke softly, gently knocking on the door. "Please.. Can you open the door?". After a few deathly hesitant moments, the door clicked open and Taesan slowly pushed the door open. He looking inside the bathroom and noticed the flowing tears spilling over your cheeks. He looked away guiltily, cursing himself for the situation he was in. "A..are you okay?" He winced at his own question, knowing the answer already. You looked over at him before looking away, "I'm fine.." your voice was choked and pained. Taesan wanted to comfort you desperately, but he remembered vividly what he said and stopped himself. "If I knew that you were this insecure about everything, I wouldn't have settled for you, we're better off apart than together!". He knew what he'd done, and it would take a miracle for you to forgive him. He stood up and went to his bedroom, leaving the door open slightly. After a few moments, he could hear the front door open and close abruptly. It was over. And he knew it.

Now

The bustling, lively atmosphere of the bar was almost enough to drown out the incessant sounds coming from your thoughts. The lights, the music, and the laughter from your friends sitting around the table - all were just a few of the distractions. And yet, none of it was enough to keep your mind from wandering towards the one thing you didn't want to think about. You caught yourself gazing off into the distance, the memories of your past relationship resurfacing like an unwelcome companion. Taesan, his name echoed in your head. The sound of laughter drew you back to the present, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of bitterness. It was hard to ignore the way your friends seemed to relish in your single status, even if they didn't mean to.

"You know, you could always just give him a call," one of your closest friends, Hanni, chimed in, nudging you playfully.

"Why on earth would I do that?" You replied, feigning nonchalance, but secretly hoping no one noticed the hint of defensiveness in your voice.Hanni shrugged, taking a sip from her cocktail, "Come on, you know he's been calling you, right?"

You tensed slightly at her words. Of course you knew. You could still vividly remember the countless missed calls, the flood of texts asking for a chat, a chance to give an explanation. But every time, you'd find yourself staring at his name on your phone screen, fingers hovering over the call button, but never quite pressing it. The bitter memory of the argument that had led to your breakup rose to the surface again, and you pushed it back down, trying to put on a casual front. "Yeah, I know," you said quietly, pretending to be more indifferent than you actually felt, "He left me, remember?"

"Yeah, but everyone knows the guy was totally smitten with you," Hanni laughed. "I mean, who wouldn't be?"

Another one of your oldest friends, Mina, chimed in, "Honestly, he was lucky to even be with you in the first place. I still can't believe you're single now."You forced a small smile at their attempts to cheer you up, but their words only seemed to rub salt in the wound. "Yeah, yeah," you muttered, trying to laugh it off. "I'm a catch."

Suddenly, you felt your heart skip a beat as your phone vibrated in your pocket. The caller ID flashed Taesan's name, and a wave of conflicting emotions washed over you. Your friends, noticing the change in your demeanour, leaned in with eager eyes, their curiosity piqued.

"Is that him?" Hanni said, eyebrows raised.

You silently nodded, staring at the screen as the call continued to ring. "Yeah," you mumbled, a mix of anxiety and anticipation building inside you. "It's him."

Taesan calls again, but you ignore it. Your friends let out small groans of disappointment, but the relief that washed over you was undeniable.

"You're really not going to answer?" Yuna questioned, looking at you with a mix of surprise and concern.

You swallowed hard, the sound of your phone ringing again setting your nerves on edge once more. It was like the universe was trying to play tricks on you.

"He's calling again," Yuna pointed out unnecessarily.

You hesitantly pressed the answer button, your heart thundering in your chest. After a few moments of silence, you finally spoke.

"Hello?"

Taesan's voice came through the line, deep and familiar, sending a mixture of emotions coursing through you.

"Hey," he said, a hint of relief in his tone, "Finally, you picked up."

You couldn't help but feel a pang of bittersweet sentiment. His voice sounded like a ghost from the past, reminding you of countless happier memories and arguments.

"What do you want, Taesan?"

There was a brief silence before his next words, as if he was carefully choosing what to say.

"I just... wanted to talk," he said, his voice unusually soft for someone who usually came off as so brusque.

The unexpected change in tone caught you off guard. The Taesan you remembered had been rough, cold, and distant, especially in the days before your breakup. Now, however, he sounded almost... vulnerable.

"Talk about what?" you asked, keeping your voice neutral, although you couldn't help the small flicker of curiosity that had flared up inside you.

"About... us," he responded, his voice slightly tinged with something akin to pain, "About what happened."

The mention of your past relationship was like a stab to the heart. You could almost feel the knot of emotions you'd been trying to push down suddenly tightening, ready to unravel.

"What's there to talk about?" you replied, trying to maintain your composure, "We broke up, that's it."

Taesan exhaled deeply, the sound of it crackling through the phone. "It's not that simple," he insisted, his voice taking on a more firm tone, "I know I messed up. I know I'm the reason we're not together anymore. I just... I want to fix it. Would you mind if you came to my apartment?"

You were taken aback by his request. Going to his apartment meant being in the same space where both your best and worst memories had been made. But despite your reservations, you found yourself asking, "Why do you want me to come there?"

Taesan's response was almost immediate, as if he'd been expecting the question. "I want to talk to you in person," he said, "It's easier to say what I need to say when you're right in front of me."

A part of you wanted to refuse, to tell him that talking on the phone was enough. But there was also a curiosity, a nagging feeling that maybe he really had something important to say.

"Fine," you said, trying to sound nonchalant, "When do you want me to come over?"

"Is now alright?" he asked, a hint of hopefulness in his voice.

You glanced at your friends, who were quietly watching your interaction. Mina raised an eyebrow, and Hanni shrugged, a silent vote of approval.

"Yeah," you replied, a hint of resignation in your tone, "Now is fine."

Taesan's voice softened again. "Thank you," he murmured, the relief evident in his words.

You ended the call, your heart still thudding against your chest. Your friends looked at you expectantly, waiting to hear what you had agreed to.

"I'm going to his apartment," you told your friends, trying to sound casual, but failing somewhat.

Mina's eyes widened, and Hanni raised an eyebrow. "Seriously? You're actually gonna go?"

"He wants to talk," you said, "And... I want to hear what he has to say."

Hanni and Mina shared a meaningful glance, knowing you well enough to sense the turmoil that was brewing within you.

"Be careful," Hanni said, a hint of worry in her voice, "He better not hurt you again."

Mina nodded, a frown on her face. "Yeah, you deserve better than that hothead."

"I'll be fine," you reassured them, though the truth was, you weren't entirely sure yourself.

Mina studied your face for a moment, concern etched in her expression. "You'll text us, right? Just to let us know you're safe."

You chuckled, appreciating their support. "I will, promise."

With that, you collected your belongings, trying to ignore the butterflies fluttering in your stomach as you headed out to Taesan's apartment. You took a taxi to his place, the journey to his apartment was a torturous mix of anticipation and anxiety. You went over countless scenarios in your head, imagining what he might say, how you would react, whether you would forgive him or not. The city outside your taxi window seemed to blur into a stream of colors and lights, mirroring the whirlwind of emotions you were feeling inside. Finally, you arrived at Taesan's apartment complex. It was a familiar sight, the building where you had spent countless nights together, both happy and angry. You took a deep breath, steadying yourself as you paid the taxi driver and stepped out into the cool evening air. You walked up the path to his door, each step feeling heavier than the last. You reached his apartment and stood for a moment, trying to collect yourself. Then, summoning all your courage, you raised your hand and knocked.

There was a moment of silence before you heard footsteps approaching. Then, the door opened, revealing Taesan. He looked nearly the same as you remembered, his tall frame and strong features instantly recognisable. His eyes widened as he saw you, and for a moment, he simply stood there, taking you in.

"I said I would," you replied, trying to sound indifferent, but unable to hide the slight tremble in your voice.

Taesan stepped back, opening the door wider. "Come in," he said quietly, gesturing for you to enter.

You swallowed, taking a step into the apartment. It looked the same as you remembered, the familiar layout and furniture bringing back a wave of memories. You could almost envision yourself and Taesan, laughing and arguing within these walls. Taesan closed the door behind you, the sound echoing through the suddenly quiet apartment. He led you to the living area, gesturing for you to sit down. The tension in the air was almost palpable as you both took a seat on opposite ends of the couch.

A few moments of uncomfortable silence passed before Taesan finally spoke, his gaze fixed on the floor. "I... I don't even know where to start," he admitted, his voice unusually vulnerable.

"How about you start from the beginning?" you suggested, trying to keep your tone neutral.

Taesan looked up, his eyes meeting yours. "The beginning... right." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I guess I should start by saying I'm sorry."

Hearing those words from him, an apology that you had longed to hear for months, brought up a well of emotions within you. You swallowed, trying to push them down as you replied, "Go on."

Taesan shifted in his seat, the guilt in his eyes almost palpable. "I was an idiot, I know that now. I took you for granted, I let the archery team get in the way... and you paid the price."

"You were pretty obsessed with it," you said, a hint of bitterness in your voice. "Did you really think spending hours on end at the archery range was better than spending time with me?"

Taesan winced at your words, his shoulders slumping. "I thought I was making the right choice," he said quietly, "I thought the archery team was my ticket to something great, something bigger than us. I didn't realize... I didn't realize I was sacrificing us in the process."

You crossed your arms, trying to shield yourself from the surge of emotions that his words had stirred up. "And what about the way you spoke to me? The way you'd snap at me for the smallest things?"

Taesan let out a sigh, a mixture of shame and regret filling his gaze. "I don't know what came over me," he confessed, "The more I dedicated myself to archery, the more I realised how much I was losing in the process. But instead of dealing with my own insecurities, I took it out on you, and I'm so sorry for that."

You clenched your fists, the hurt from months of feeling insignificant and unloved suddenly rushing to the surface. "You made me feel worthless, Taesan. Like I was just some afterthought in your life."

Tears welled up in Taesan's eyes, his expression one of genuine remorse. "I never should have made you feel that way. You were the best thing that ever happened to me, and I threw it all away because I was too blind to see what really mattered."

Taesan inched closer to you on the couch, his body so close that you could almost feel the heat radiating from him. His voice trembled as he spoke, "Can I... can I try something?"

Caught off guard by his sudden closeness, you tensed, unsure of what he was planning to do. But with a slight nod, you allowed him to proceed, curiosity mixing with your caution.

Taesan slowly reached out a hand, gently resting it on your arm. The contact was soft, a stark contrast to the roughness of his demeanour before. He spoke softly, his voice sincere. "I know words can't undo what I did, but I want to show you something."

You held your breath, the intimacy of his touch and the earnestness in his voice making your heart flutter even as your mind screamed caution. "Show me what?" you asked, intrigued in spite of yourself.

Taesan's fingers gently slid down your arm, leaving tingles along your skin. His gaze locked onto yours as he continued, his voice a mere whisper, "Close your eyes."

With a mixture of trepidation and anticipation, you followed his direction, closing your eyes. The room was suddenly plunged into darkness, your other senses heightening to compensate for the absence of sight.

You felt Taesan's presence shift as he moved closer, his breath gently washing across your skin. He spoke again, his voice so close that you shivered, "Just relax."

The sound of his voice, low and soothing, sent a wave of calm through you. Despite your reservations, you felt your body begin to loosen up, the tension in your shoulders easing slightly. You took a deep breath, trying to focus on the sensations rather than your thoughts.

Taesan's fingers traced a soft path along your jawline, his touch as light as a feather. It was a different side of him, a tenderness you had only glimpsed before. He spoke once more, his voice a gentle murmur, "Picture us together. Can you do that for me?"

Your mind instantly went back to the good memories - laughing together, cuddling on the couch, sharing quiet moments in his embrace. "I can," you replied softly, the images flooding into your head.

"Good," Taesan praised, his touch still caressing your jawline. "Now remember how I made you feel. Special, wanted, loved."

The memories hit you like a wave, the familiar feelings of warmth and affection rising up within you. "Yes," you whispered, your voice thick with emotion, "I remember."

Taesan's touch moved lower, tracing along your neck, sending shivers down your spine. "Now think of all the things I missed out on," he said quietly, the regret evident in his tone. "Nights we didn't spend together, times I wasn't there for you, moments I took for granted."

The sting of those losses came back to you, the memories of solitary evenings and lonely weekends filling your mind. You let out a shaky breath, the pain still fresh, still raw. "Yeah.. I remember."

His fingers continued their journey, gently trailing across your collarbone. "And now," Taesan murmured, his voice taking on an edge of determination, "Think about how badly I want to make it up to you. To make all those memories I missed out on, and so much more."

Your heart thumped in your chest, the intensity in his words evoking a mixture of hope and fear. "You can't just undo all the hurt," you said, your voice almost quivering, "Even if you want to."

"I know I can't," Taesan agreed, his touch now at the base of your throat. "But I want to try, more than anything. I want to show you how much I regret the way I treated you. How much I..." He hesitated, his fingers pausing.

Your pulse raced as you waited for him to finish his sentence, the implications of unspoken words hanging heavily in the air. "How much you..." you prompted softly, your heart in your throat.

Taesan's touch moved lower, his fingers drifting over your shirt, each contact sending electricity through your veins. He spoke again, his voice barely above a whisper, "How much I still love you."

Those three words, uttered so sincerely, hit you like a freight train. You opened your eyes, looking at him, your heart caught in a whirlwind of emotions. Your breath hitched in your throat, your heart stuttering in your chest. The words you had longed to hear for months, so full of yearning and remorse, were finally spoken. "Taesan..." you murmured, your voice thick with a tangle of emotions.

Taesan's fingers paused at your waist, his touch warm and firm. "I know I messed up," he said, his gaze holding yours, "I know I should have realized how much you meant to me before I lost you. But I promise, from the bottom of my heart, I won't make that mistake again."

You wanted to believe him, you wanted the words to be true, but the hurt and fear still held you back. "How can I trust that?" you asked, the words coming out more pained than you had intended.

Taesan's fingers continued their path up your sides, each touch like a gentle plea for forgiveness. "Because I'll do whatever it takes to prove it to you," he said, his voice earnest. "I won't let anything come between us again. Not archery, not anything."

The conviction in his words hit a nerve, giving credence to the hope that was quietly growing within you. "What about the archery team?" you asked, your voice betraying a hint of hesitation, "It was your dream... your everything."

Taesan's hand reached your face, his thumb gently stroking your cheek. "I was a fool to let it consume me the way it did," he admitted, a hint of bitterness in his voice. "I thought it was my ticket to something bigger, but I was wrong. You... you are what matters, what I should have prioritised all along."

"Only if you say yes"

Authors note:

Sorry for the long wait and very long story (I did add a little Enha reference tho).. this is practically only part one, so others will join this. I plan on making it a large series. Thanks for reading if you got this far! Bye Pooks!

In the meantime as I'm writing pt 2. Plz appreciate this man and take good care of him. He deserves it.

[sequinsmile-x]

Better

Ordinary.

The way her mother says it makes it sound like poison, like something that was infiltrating her life and tearing it apart from the inside out. An awful, ugly thing instead of the beautiful thing that tied her life together like the finest gold thread.

-x-

Hi friends,

If you haven't seen it, I've been getting more anon hate than usual recently, almost entirely around the fact pregnancy/Emily having a family with Aaron is a common them in my fics and how they hate that I write about it. Instead of just...seeing the tags and moving on they've been sending me anons criticising me for it. This culminated in me getting a message yesterday that sent me into orbit saying I was making Emily 'mediocre' by making her a mother like other 'mediocre' women.

(you can read the anon here if you haven't and want to it is WILD)

Now, whatever your feelings are about fanfic or characterisation of Emily, calling someone mediocre for their choices, implying that wanting whatever they want is bad, is ridiculous behaviour.

I've had a lot of feelings about it all day, and ending up writing this to get it out because that is how I process things.

As always, let me know what you think.

-x-

Warnings: Lots and lots of mommy issues

Words: 3k

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

From the moment her mother had suggested it, Emily had wanted to get out of going to lunch. Elizabeth insisted that she came over to the event she was hosting with some of her old friends, claiming the other women hadn’t seen Emily in years and that they wanted to catch up. She’d struggled to come up with a good reason to get out of it, even praying for a case that meant she’d be out of stage, something Aaron had raised an eyebrow at.

“You’re praying someone has killed enough people that the team needs to get involved?” 

She’d rolled her eyes at him and huffed, all too aware that he was right, and she’d kissed his cheek as she left the house just before midday, her gaze lingering on him and the kids as they settled down to play their favourite game. 

Lunch was, overall, boring. It was a reminder of a life she’d left behind, the one she’d been born into where every word was carefully chosen yet most the time people said absolutely nothing at all. Their words meaningless, full of fluff and inflexions that she hated. False interest in each other's lives as they desperately waited for someone to ask about them. 

She barely says anything, slowly eating her salad and humming intermittently so it seems like she’s listening, until one of her mother’s friends, Carol, gets her attention. 

“So, what are you up to these days, Emily? Your Mother says you’re still working for the FBI?” 

Emily nods, “Yeah, I work for the Behavioural Analysis Unit, the BAU. My husband used to as well but he retired when our daughter was born three years ago.” 

It had been Aaron’s decision, a solution he’d come up with when they found out she was pregnant with Hazel. He’d been keen to do it, unmoveable in his insistence, his eyes bright and almost overflowing with desperation, as if this was his second chance to make the right decision for his family. She’d agreed, after some back and forth, a voice in the back of her head telling her she’d be a bad mom if she went back to work when she didn’t strictly need to, something Aaron and her friends had slowly talked her out of over the long nine months of her pregnancy. 

Leaving the FBI herself was something she considered again when she had Oliver only 8 months ago, but once again she’d stayed. Happy with the balance she’d created, the life she’d built around herself that let her be Agent Prentiss, a member of one of the most well respected teams in the FBI, and Emily, a wife and mother. 

“Oh yes,” Carol says, picking up her cup of tea, “You have children.”

“Three,” Emily says, her back straightening at something she picks up in the other woman’s tone, a little too close to judgment for her liking, “Jack, Hazel and Oliver.” 

“Lovely names,” Carol says, “Although I must say I was surprised when Elizabeth told us you’d settled down and had children, it wasn’t that long ago it looked like you’d be following in her footsteps and trailblazing yourself a career.” 

Emily frowns, her teeth clenched as she takes a second to calm herself down, “I do still have a career, I just happen to have children too.” 

“Yes well,” Carol says, waving her hand, “You know what they say - a jack of all trades, a master of none.” 

She scoffs, looking to her mother for support, immediately wondering why she thought she’d find it when Elizabeth avoids eye contact with her, a fake smile painted across her face as she stands up from the dining table, “I’ll go check on dessert.” 

Emily stays behind after the others leave, barely even attempting to be polite as she exchanges goodbyes with them. As soon as it’s just her and her mother she can’t help herself, the question escaping before she can ask herself if she would even get an answer she’d want. 

“Why didn’t you stand up for me when she was saying all those things?” She asks, her arms crossed over her chest as Elizabeth freezes and sighs. 

“I wasn’t going to cause a scene,” she says, standing up to walk over to the small bar cart in the living room, pouring herself a scotch, “And besides, she didn’t say anything rude.” 

Emily laughs, “She didn’t say anything rude? She basically said because I’m working and I’m a mom I’m not doing well at either of those things,” she scoffs and shakes her head, “She may as well have called me mediocre and be done with it.” There’s a pause, a flash of something across her mother’s face that she’s sure she wouldn’t have seen if she wasn’t so good at her job. For a moment, she wishes she wasn’t, that she didn’t feel the drop of her heart into her stomach as her arms fall to her sides, “Wait….do you agree with her?” 

Elizabeth stares at her for a second, as if weighing up her options, and she takes a sip of her drink, “Well, you did love to travel when you were younger, Emily. I always assumed you’d do a job that took you all over the world. It wasn’t until you started dating Aaron I ever thought you’d settle down and have an ordinary life.” 

Ordinary.

The way her mother says it makes it sound like poison, like something that was infiltrating her life and tearing it apart from the inside out. An awful, ugly thing instead of the beautiful thing that tied her life together like the finest gold thread. It was something she never thought she’d have. The house and the husband and the children. The cat that never used the cat flap they had installed, happy to curl up at the end of one of the kid's beds instead of ever venturing outside. The school drop-offs and the PTA meetings and the last-minute rush to the grocery store for ingredients for cooking class when Jack told them about it at the last possible second. It was normal, and ordinary and hers. And it was everything she had fought for. 

It was everything she had died for. 

Emily had let a lot slide over the last few years, let countless comments go about herself and sometimes even Aaron because Elizabeth loved her grandchildren. What she’d lacked in being a mother she made up for as a grandmother. She bought them gifts that they actually liked, she listened to them. On Hazel’s first birthday, she’d crawled into the playhouse they’d bought the little girl, acting so unlike herself that Emily had thought she was seeing things. She was grateful her children had someone else in their lives who loved them, so she put up with the fact her mother had never loved her like that. 

All of that disappears as Elizabeth’s words wash over her. A quiet, almost dull, confession that hangs in the air around them a bitter pill that erases any good nature Emily had for her mother. 

She chuckles humourlessly and shakes her head, turning away to wipe angry tears from her cheeks, “I’ve got to ask, Mother,” she says, turning back to look at her, her hands thrown up in defeat, “Why did you even have me? If you think me having children is so…ordinary, why did you have a kid?” 

Elizabeth sighs, her hands on her hips, “Emily-”

“Was it because it was what was expected? You and Dad weren’t as careful as you should have been? What was it?” She demands, not sure she even wants the answer, the sadness and fury rolling in her gut in a way that makes nausea burn up her throat. The silence they fall into is suffocating. Thick and cloying as it settles in Emily’s lungs, making it hard to breathe. She looks down at the floor, her arms tight over her chest as she presses her lips together, desperately trying to hold herself together, “I have a good life.” 

“I never said you didn’t,” Elizabeth says, “I only said I’d thought you’d make different choices.”

“Do you mean better?” Emily asks, her glare unrelenting, and Elizabeth simply looks away, her silence the only answer Emily needs. 

It seems ridiculous. Absurd in a way that makes her laugh, because she can’t imagine how life could be better. She knows that if she’d made different choices, if she’d taken Clyde up on his offer of a job and a new life she would have enjoyed it. She would have been fulfilled and happy but it would have been different to what she had now. Another life she’d now never know, something she couldn’t compare to the life she did have because it didn’t exist and never had. She had no regrets, could never regret even for a second choosing this over anything else. It was her life. Her beautiful, ordinary, life. 

Anger and sadness and everything in between swell in her gut again, making her stomach roll as she clenches her fists at her sides. The burn of her short nails into her palm is familiar, and for a moment she’s 12 years old standing opposite her mother in her office, her nails digging into her palms as she’s told off for not acting as she should have, for getting grass stains on a skirt that cost more than most people made in a month. She shakes it off, an unsteady breath caught in her chest as she’s brought back to the present, to standing in a room just down the hall from her mother’s office over 30 years older and somehow just as silently crushed as she had been when she was a kid. 

It was a feeling she’d promised herself she’d never inflict on her own children. A mantra that had started years before she had them, when she was just a kid herself with her hand pressed into her lower belly as the medication she’d been given by the doctor started to work. She’d be better. She told herself again and again that one day, when it was right, she’d be a mother and she’d be better. It’s a promise she made Declan when he slept up against her on the nights when Ian wasn’t there, his fear of his father pressed against her neck as he asked her if he was in trouble again. She makes the same promise to Jack when she realises she’s stepped into a maternal role in his life, her relationship with him so tied up in her relationship with Aaron that it feels like it happens overnight. She’d be better. She says it again to Hazel just a few hours after she’s born, and again with Oliver when she holds him for the first time. She’d be better.

She was better. She knew that. Her children ran towards her, not away, when they were sad or hurt or sick. They sought her out, snuck into her embrace at any given moment, slipping under her arm as she sat on the couch and they should already have been in bed. Aaron often joked he could disappear and no one would notice, something she’d always quickly refute, the idea of him not being right by her side enough to make her shudder. 

“Better than what? A man who loves me the way Aaron does? Than my children?” Her voice cracks and she clenches her teeth to try to steady her lower lip, “For the first time my life is normal, Mom. I go to work, I come home. I spend my evenings helping my kids with homework and driving them to recitals. And then I share a glass of wine with my husband because I’m still breastfeeding Ollie and don’t want to risk a whole glass. Then we get into bed and do it all over again the next day. It’s so ordinary it makes me ache sometimes because it’s all I ever wanted when I was growing up,” she growls in frustration when tears slip onto her cheeks and she wipes them away immediately, “My life might be small to you, but to me it’s perfect and I am the happiest I have ever been,” she swallows thickly, pushing down the emotions she refuses to set free until she’s home. Until she’s with her husband - the only person she’d ever truly feel comfortable falling apart in front of. “I’m going home.”

“Emily, there’s no need to be so upset,” Elizabeth says as Emily turns away, an edge of panic in her voice she had only heard a handful of times, “We can talk about this.” 

“No,” she refuses, already turning and walking away, “We can’t. I’m going home.” 

She’s proud of herself for making it to the car before the tears come in earnest, burning hot with fury as they leave what feels like permanent tracks on her skin.

___ 

She can’t bring herself to get out of the car. 

She sits on the driveway, still buckled long after she’s switched off the engine, her hands still tightly gripping the steering wheel. Even though she’s staring straight ahead, her eyes fixed on the porch that she loves, she doesn’t see the front door open and her husband wander outside. It’s only when he lightly raps on the window, making her jump and pulling her out of her trance, that she realises he’s there. She unlocks the door but makes no other effort to move. He pulls it open and crouches down, his face level with hers. 

“Where are the kids?” She asks, her voice tight even to her own ears, any chance she has of insisting she is fine dead and gone before she can even try. 

“Ollie is napping,” he says, waving the baby monitor he has held in his hand, “Good thing we get reception out here. And Jack is showing Hazel how to play MarioKart.” 

She nods, her tongue pressed against the back of her teeth as she tries to hold herself together, her eyes already burning with tears because of his proximity, “Good.” 

They lapse into silence and he watches her carefully, the tightness to her expression extreme even for an afternoon spent with her mother. He places his hand on her knee and squeezes, “I’m guessing because of your general demeanour, and the fact you’ve been sat out here for almost 20 minutes, that lunch went off without a hitch.”

She laughs. It’s wet and painful as it catches on her ribs, the force of it making tears splash down onto her cheeks and she nods, wiping them away, “Something like that.” 

“Want to talk about it?” He asks, always sure to give her the option, and she nods, “Okay, well let's go sit on the porch,” he says, reaching over her to unbuckle her belt, “I don’t think my knees could take crouching like this much longer.” 

She nods and lets him lead her out of the car, passing him the keys so he can lock it. They sit on the top step leading up to the porch, both of them looking out at the neighbourhood they loved, and he waits her out. Let her figure out what he was going to say, his shoulder pressed against hers as she tries to navigate the emotions swirling through her body, making her dizzy even though she was sitting down.

“She called me ordinary.” 

It’s so left of field, so out of nowhere, it takes him a second to react. His eyebrows furrowing as he turns to look at her, his gaze fixed on her side profile as she continues to look straight ahead, “What?” 

“Mother she…” she clears her throat, “Well one of her friends did first. Said she was surprised I’d settled down and had kids. After she left I made the stupid decision to ask Mom why she didn’t defend me,” she laughs mirthlessly at herself, “I don’t know what I was expecting,” she finally turns to look at him, her eyes briefly meeting his before she hugs her knees to her chest and rests her chin on them, “Anyway, turns out she agreed. She thought I’d do more with my life than get married and have kids I guess.”

Angry doesn’t even come close to explaining how he feels. Fury that had once burned the walls of his childhood home, leaving the wallpaper singed and smoke damaged, burning in his lungs. He closes his eyes for a moment, takes in a deep breath, and pushes the anger away for now, knowing it’s not what she needs. 

“She’s wrong.” 

She looks up at him and smiles, shifting so her head is on his shoulder, “I know she’s wrong,” she says, curling her arms around one of his, “I love our life. I love that it’s as normal as it can be with everything we’ve been through. It’s almost extraordinary in how ordinary it is” she sniffs, turning her head to kiss him through his shirt, “If anything, I think I feel bad for her.” 

He frowns, resting his cheek on top of her head, letting her melt into his side, “Oh yeah?”

She hums, “I’m sad she can’t see the beauty in it,” she says, tilting her head to look up at him, “And that she probably never will.” 

He cups her cheek and leans in to kiss her, his forehead against hers as he pulls back, “That’s her loss,” he says, kissing her again, “I’m sorry, baby. It can’t be nice having your own mother say that.” 

She chuckles and shakes her head, swallowing thickly, “No. It isn’t,” she says, blowing out a shaky breath, “But I’ll do better than her. I’ll always think our kids are amazing no matter what they do with their lives,” her lips shake and her eyes close, fresh tears spilling onto her cheeks that he wipes away immediately, “I’ll do better.” 

He’s heard her say it before. A whisper against Jack’s forehead after she’d read him a story until he fell asleep. A promise to a newborn Hazel and then Oliver a few years later. He wraps his arms around her, gathers her against his chest as she sinks into him, his lips against her hairline as he replies. 

“You already are, sweetheart,” he says, “You already are.” 

-x-

Tag List:

@ssa-sparks , @ptrckjcne , @lyds102 , @glockleveledatyourcrotch , @hotchnissenthusiast , @danadeservesadrink , @ssamorganhotchner , @emilyprentissisgod , @notagentprentiss , @freesiasandfics , @emilyshotchniss , @thecharmingart , @paulitalblond , @hancydrewfan , @camille093 , @whitecrossgirl , @moonlight-2-6, @rawr-jess , @florenceremingtonthethird, @jareauswife , @ms-black-a , @beebeelank , @aubreyprc , @zipzapboingg, @psychopath-at-heart , @criminalmindsgonewrong , @fionaloover , @kinqslcys , @prentissinred , @ccmattis-22, @denvivale317, @thrindis, @hotchsguccitie , @cmfouatslota77 , @alexblakegf , @aliensaurusrex, @prentissxhotch , @emobabeyy , @victoiregranger , @stormyweatherth , @wanderingdreamer009 , @ssablackbird , @luhwithah , @lex13cm , @prentiss-theorem, @dont-emily-me , @mrs-ssa-hotch , @jocyycreation, @itsmytimetoodream , @hotchnissgroupie, @controversialpooh, @capsshinyshield , @canuck-eh

Join my tag list here!

[hjemne]

I think a lot of the debates between fanfic writers / intra-community hostility (particularly around how 'accurately' characters are depicted in fic and how dominant explicit fics are becoming) are because the purpose and function of fanfic are fundamentally different for different people, and so fic authors play by very different rules while still using the same label of 'fanfiction' to describe it.

There's a spectrum to the purpose of writing fanfic that I think goes from 'fanfic as a form of literary character analysis' at one end, 'fanfic as smashing barbies together and putting characters in Situations' in the middle, and 'fanfic as a safe and communal space for exploring sexual fantasies' at the other end, which is an approach best summarised by this:

So fanfic writers and readers from the character analysis group might look at the fics written by that last group and go '??? WHY are they writing Mr Blorbo like this? this is so ooc what are they doing?' and the reason is that the fic has an entirely different purpose and is for an entirely different audience. We see so much in-fighting and morality policing over fanfic because people with VERY different expectations, motivations and priorities all share the same space.

A lot of the time when you come across a fic that makes you go 'what the FUCK is this, this is so ooc/fucked up', it makes a LOT more sense when you realise the author is much further towards the 'fanfic as a medium for pornography' side of the spectrum than you are. And when you see people complaining about the prevalence of x reader or explicit dead dove fics, instead of jumping into a pro vs anti 'fiction isn't reality' debate, consider whether they are a 'fanfic as character analysis' person expressing annoyance that it is (often) increasingly hard to find those types of fic.

Both of these uses of fanfic are valid, understandable and important to protect. It's no secret that the fanfic community is dominated by women and queer people, who haven't traditionally been the target audience of erotica/porn, and who absolutely deserve a space to express and explore sexual desires/fantasies. 'Fanfic as pornography' is not above criticism, but I think it's far more helpful to criticise it as you would more mainstream forms of porn.

'Thing X is getting increasingly common in fic and we as an entire community need to step back and consider the implications of X for how it fetishises Y minority group irl' -> yes

'Character A would NOT do [kink scenario]' -> you are missing the point of that fic, I fear

'I think it's frustrating how hard it can be to find fanfic about [theme in original work], everthing on AO3 is all just self-insert or ['''problematic''' ship no. 12457] fics :(' -> this statement is not a moral condemnation of these types of fic. people are allowed to not want to read 'fanfic as porn' fics. we don't need to start fights over this.

Horny fandom please remember you are in a fandom space where people are allowed to want fandom-centric stuff. Fandom-centric people please remember you are interacting with other people, who are allowed to be horny, and that fiction is absolutely the best and safest place to explore 'extreme' kinks. Yeah, it can be annoying that everyone gets crammed into the same spaces when we all have very different ideas of what we want fanfic to be, but this is the way things are, so we need to learn to understand each others perspectives and stop jumping into fights at the slightest perceived criticism of your personal way of doing things

[pinkandpurple360]

Response to your post (since I'm having a glitch on my side of Tumblr I can only ask, like, and reblog):

The crazy thing is, Sarcastic Chorus just goes from being a critic to defending Stolas/his "diehard ship" like nothing ever happened.

I'd also blame Cash Buckzo and the whole circus except for Tilla, Idk about Fizz since we don't have enough flashbacks to see him defend Blitz from the ringmaster, all we do get is Fizz being the golden goose, same with Barbie but it's implied Cash fed her more believable lies to keep her away from Blitz.

Why do both fans and critics not blame Cash enough?! ;-;

I get that what he did to Blitz "doesn't excuse" what he's doing to Moxie at the beginning of S1 but I pass it off as BAD WRITING from the crew, we all forget that Blitz is Brandon's self-insert, not his own character... and while Brandon is better than Viv or Adam, he can't save the show, the only way is to restart S2 entirely.

Yeah he has the same irrational obsessive attachment to a show-ruining “ship” that he has criticised other people for having. He knows how shipping ruins entire franchises, but his fixation on this deeply creepy one, clouds his vision. Stolitz exists mostly for the purpose of 🌽 for women and wish fulfilment for lonely men who hate women and enjoy stories where they are uniquely wholly evil. Both of these things have a euphoric effect on the mind.

While the whole thing is sinking he’s the one saying it’s all fine because at least sad pretty boy got to kiss mean grouchy boy.

Cash and Stolas are both miserably greedy drunks who trade love and affection for favours in return from blitz. Nothing showcases that more than this scene:

blitz is the one who must be psychologically reevaluate himself however. And gaslight himself into thinking gift giving and grand gestures from stolas undermine all the pain and grief he’s constantly caused him.

Follow me and ravish me imp, what if we worked out an exchange- enticing favours for favours, I have a special request I’ll pay you, I have the book itty bitty imp so you have little choice but to join me at the festival, are you alright? Good because If you get in trouble I get in trouble we don’t want that, my daughter isn’t home today so we can get drunk, where am I supposed to find my daughter, I think you should come save me. I’m giving you this gift because I want you to stay here with me because you want to, and I want you to look at me and think “well you’re the only one I want”.

- who is making every last thing about transactions and fulfilling his own wants?

[crazyintheeast]

Chappell Roan is the epitome of why liberals keep failing in USA . She is the most stereotypical internet liberal . Someone who doesn’t understand politics and more importantly someone who absolutely refuses to learn and correct themselves ever . We see people like her all the time online . Liberals who live for the drama , who shout and rage but don’t actually do anything in real life . Sure they might go to a protest because again drama but actually becoming part of their local political landscape ? Run for office ? Volunteer ? Nope . They almost never do. In fact you can barley get them to vote

They see politics through the lenses of movies , where you if you shout long and hard enough and do some frantic gestures the opticians bow down and the good guys win . And as soon as their scenario doesn’t happen they immediately quit and refuse to do anything because in their kinds this will “teach the politicians a lesson . It will hold them accountable “ . We saw it with Obama as they handed control to the senate when he magically didn’t solve their problems , we saw in 2016 when they handed the country and the Supreme Court to Trump because their idol Bernie didn’t get elected . And no we see it again with people like Roan and her kind who think it’s more important to criticise dmeocrsts then then sheer horrifying evil and threat of Trump and Vance

And when you point this fact they always parrot the exact same type of strawmen “OMG YOU WANT US TO WORSHIP THE DEMOCRATS AND BLINDLY FOLLOW THEM ? “ or “I AM HOLDING THE POLITICIANS ACCOUNTABLE. THEY NEED TO EARN MY VOTE “ and then they tend to have a meltdown and get very self righteous .

This is bullshit of course . If they lived in a normal country you could do it. You could vote for a third or fourth partu and then on the second tour of elections the President would be force to make alliance with this party and incorporate them into the government. But USA is not a normal country . Here you have ONLY TWO CHOICES when it comes to President . Horrifying evil or a typical politicians .

And I can practically feel some of your exploding to parrot the accountability line again. . You can hold them accountable . You can do it by writing to your representative, by voting in primaries , by supporting candidates who represent your views . Chappell Roan could have easily done that . She could have supported pro Palestinian candidates who got ahnilated by the Zionist lobbies , she could have constantly told people to write their representatives, she could have hosted benefits for pro Palestinian candidates . Hell she is rich enough she could have hired her own lobby firm to lobby for Palestine . But that would mean actually getting involved into the cruel and deeply boring and dirty world of politics . So instead jsut like all those internet armchair liberals she just complained online , gave some symbolic donations that might help individual Palestinians but do nothing about the political situation and called it a day

And most of you who support her are like this . You want solution to the problems but instead demanding specific actions and doing the hard , very slow and ungrateful job of doing the step by step work you about into the void some vague demands about change , stol genocide etc and act like you are above politics . Yeah that’s not how it works . If you want to be vague and bullshit your way through politics you vote blindly for the lesser evil ( yes evil in the only option in politics . There is not good ) like the sheep you claim to hate or if you want real change you get detailed and world hard

Yes I know the vast majority of tik tok / Twitter liberals and Roan fans won’t actually bother even finishing what I wrote and would just write some dismissive nonsense or parrot some random line they think it’s wittty . And the rest would ignore the entire point and go on about how Roan is a good person who cares missing the entire point . It doesn’t matter if you are a good person or how much you care about the issue . The only thing that matters is whether you help or not . Right now the ONLY way you can help and is to vote like your life depends on it and insist that everyone you know votes as well and about how dangerous Vance and Trump are . The biggest piece of shit who votes and takes a stand against Trump and Vance is doing more to help the world then the most saintly caring liberal who goes on about both sides and does random tik tok world salsa where they threat voting like some annoying chore

And lastly remember. EVRY VOTES MATTERS even if you are in a red state . Bush won by 500 votes

[tibby]

i think it's partly bc of rerecording her albums and having fans love the vault tracks that she now feels she cant leave anything on the cutting room floor just in case

i definitely think that's part of it, but - and i say this as someone who likes a majority of the vault tracks - i think it was a good thing that they were initially left on the cutting room floor. including them originally would have detracted from what the albums were trying to say.

speak now and 1989 are the best examples of this. the point of speak now was two things: taylor wanting to prove she could do it on her own, and each song referencing a specific person or scenario. with the exception of when emma falls in love (the weakest of the lot imo) and castles crumbling (which has a feature), the SNTV vault tracks are more...vague in who/what they're about. and sure, if they'd been released on the original album with the secret messages we might have more context, but that isn't something we can say for certain. speak now is the only album that's about multiple people and we can pinpoint who or what each song is referencing (except maybe sparks fly which was included for the fans, and haunted but that could be because i've never cared enough to investigate if it's about john or joe).

as for 1989, i think the vault tracks are definitely stronger than some of the songs that made the cut (as much as i love WTNY and HYGTG, they're not her best work), but i don't think they would have fit into the story she was trying to tell. whether taylor successfully made an album that is about independence and not love is up for debate, but she claims that was her intention. IION and say don't go aren't great fits for that story, especially since it was one she was trying to tell within the secret messages.

i think red's biggest problem is that it was already too long of an album (which is also part of speak now's problem). i think the red vault tracks fit the theme of all the varying degrees of love, but red TV clocks out at over two hours. it's possible that forever winter in particular was too raw a song to release at the time (has she played it live yet? i haven't kept up with eras tour that much).

and while i love the fearless vault tracks, i do wonder if including them would have earned it less acclaim. they're good songs, but fearless is by far her most polished album imo. even the deluxe tracks, which i also adore, kinda take away from how well rounded the standard album is. it's very possible it's only capped at 13 tracks because cds back then could only hold so much, but i also think that it was a better decision for the marketing of the album itself.

but now, with ttpd and the eight million versions of midnights, it's harder to find the good shit because it's surrounded by so much filler. and yeah, part of it is that some of the songs on those albums are just...not good (bejeweled my deepest enemy), but i think a culling would have greatly benefitted them. ESPECIALLY with ttpd. taylor's always been songwriter who releases stuff that could be diary entries, but at least before it was like...you at least edited this. now it just seems like we're getting every single journal entry as is. and it's tiring. 31 songs is too much. hell, 16 songs for lover was too much.

ultimately i think it comes down to the fact that she no longer gets any push back from the people she works with, and fans are both willing to accept quantity over quality and (for many swifties, but not all) there's just a refusal to criticise her work at all. and i think taylor's desire to constantly release new content (which i think is a combination of a constant need for relevancy combined with the fact she's always writing) combined with being surrounded by yes men and adoring fans is impacting her work negatively. which has been the case since lover if not earlier, but i think midnights/ttpd are her most glaring examples of it.

anyway lmao sorry this got long. sorry for never being on here and then finally showing up to have opinions about taylor swift. do you guys still think i'm hot.

[electric-friend]

listen i know the whole “ed did nothing wrong”/“killing and maiming his his coping mechanism uwu” thing is a super silly joke lol and even i found it funny but it’s kinda just pissing me off.

i just hate that they never really properly resolved ed resorting to violence when he’s upset and that he never really takes accountability for his actions onscreen. and when the side of the fandom that takes no issue at all with the way seeason two was presented makes jokes that show they’re like aware of the vibes they just don’t care bc they hold characters they don’t like and characters they do like to entirely different standards. it’s just annoying lol.

like listen. yeah. ed’s my special little babygirl princess haha i love him. but like. i feel like it’s also ignoring the fact that the violence is actually bad for ed’s mental health and we know this and it’s canonically established.

the same people who make “ed did nothing wrong” jokes literally call people who do the same to izzy bad people. not all of them but like the people aligned with that Side of the fandom.

like first of all we know that canonically though ed’s capable of violence it’s not good for him. that’s a huge part of his character, that he doesn’t want to be Blackbeard. so the jokes ur making leave your favourite character unhappy anyway? and if you’re going to talk like that about ed then why is it a CRIME to do the same about izzy?

i think i’m just kinda annoyed bc people act like if you’re critical of the way the writing failed to give ed a great redemption arc it’s because you’re a racist idiot blind with love for izzy, but in fact, you can remove izzy from the equation entirely and it still sucks because it sucks for ed’s character that his arc was so confusing and we left him in such an uncertain place as a character.

listen, i don’t exactly advertise this bc i feel like people won’t understand, but i’ve been through a lot of trauma, and at times in my life when that’s been a lot fresher for me, i’ve had really serious issues with anger and aggression and lashing out. i think that’s why i connected with izzy and i think it’s why i connected with ed so strongly but also found it so hard to watch the first couple episodes of the second season.

and coming from that place, with that perspective, when i talk about ed being abusive towards izzy and the narrative not being resolved, i am NOT hating on ed and cancelling ed and saying ed is an evil person. what i’m saying is that ofmd s2 took on a really, really complex and serious and intense subject matter, and then the writing failed to carry the weight of that. i love ed, and i feel like his character was let down by us not seeing him clearly express that he’s holding himself accountable for his actions on-screen, or even seeing him healing in relation to his violent impulses that come from his trauma. his killing spree in the finale was really odd in terms of his overall arc and is honestly what threw it all off the most for me. like it’s obvious that scenes regarding ed’s apologies and forgiveness from the crew are supposed to have happened and we maybe just didn’t see all of it, because the season was rushed due to the screen time. but a lot of it is also just poor decisions in the writing and the way ed’s storyline is laid out in the final cut.

to me, saying that ed’s arc was beautiful and perfect and it’s wrong to criticise it or to acknowledge the severity of his mistakes and actions isn’t a form of loving ed. it’s a way of saying you’d rather ed actually not take steps towards healing, just because you want to pretend he didn’t do anything wrong in the first place so you can feel like the better person in the conversation. to me, the people who say ed did no wrong are expressing that they actually don’t love ed.

i mean it’s not that deep, it’s all fictional, but i wish people would look beyond their predisposition to condemning criticism of something they like, and see that there’s a lot of heart, and a lot of really personal experience and real-world context behind the arguments people are making, and that other opinions about the writing in s2 are worth listening to even if they make you uncomfortable at first.

[fandomwritingbit]

One thing, William brat-taming! That it. (AFAB reader)

This man might say he wants a good girl, but that's largely a lie. He wants you to push boundaries just so he has the excuse to punish you, lol.

William Afton and brat-taming headcannons

(smut nsfw below the cut mdni)

He's so the type of bloke to boast about 'taming' you and teaching you how to behave for him, under the threat and use of punishment. What punishments, well...

You run your mouth to him? Maybe call him names, criticise him? Oof, yeah, he's then reminding you what you should be using that mouth for. Whether that be his fingers deep in your mouth while he makes you ride him, or using your throat like his toy to get off, not letting you touch yourself.

He'd so use edging and orgasm denial to remind you who is in charge too. He could tie you up spread-eagle for him and press a vibrator between your legs for the millionth time, feeling zero sympathy when you beg him to let you cum, the whole 'only good girls get to cum' mentality. But tbh he doesn't need to tie you up. The man is so huge he could easily restrain you enough with one hand, pinning yours above your head, so tight you'll be wearing his grip as a bracelet for a few days.

He'd make it clear who calls the shots by making you say his name, driving you so crazy with stimulation 'til it's the only word you can remember. But if you're being really bratty... you're calling him 'sir' or 'Mr Afton' or 'Daddy' Ahem.

But now, onto the cardinal sin, the most punishable offence: making eyes at another man. You want to see him go nought to a hundred within the snap of fingers- that's the way to go about it. He sees you hanging off another man's words and blinking pretty at them, you're getting punished. He could probably play it cool for a while, lull you into faux-security, but the second you're alone with him, the claws are out. He's degrading you calling you a slut, a whore, a slag, all of it. "Do I need to write on your fucking forehead who you belong to, huh?" If you've been bratty enough, that's exactly what he'll do, writting all kinds of obscene stuff all over your skin, fucking you stupid before, during and after. "What's the matter? I thought you wanted attention?"

All that being said, yes, Will wouldn't flinch at the idea of taming you. But good girls get rewarded too, so be nice and do as youre told and youll see the other side.

But as nice as he can be, sometimes it's just fun to be a brat, innit?