#yeah i know this is the 'how dare you say we piss on the poor' website what did i expect

[one-winged-dreams]

I'm just so fucking tired of it all

[casiavium]

[seventhdoctor]

#also to be fair he was a kid when he did it

Okay I wasn't going to comment on the original reply because 1) Yubel's crimes aren't even the point of this post* and 2) that user doesn't seem to like me in particular (given they have an "anti" tag that's just posts of mine they've commented on) and I've blocked them to save us both some headache, but before this risks breaking containment too hard I want to point out the original tags here:

Note that the person who made these comments chose to omit the last tag, which on top of phrases like "never 4get" is intended to communicate that I am attempting to be funny on the Internet and roasting a character I'm fond of, rather than seriously attacking his character. On a joke post, about Yugioh characters saying skill issue.

* And before someone tries to take this out of context again, I shouldn't even have to say this but this skill issue joke post is not intended to be a post where I discuss my opinions of Yubel's crimes and it never was.

Edit: I realize this post is a bit cranky so here's an additional joke now that I've had to comment on the original reply anyway:

Check for comprehension (in the style of reading-comp-posting):

What meme is the original post referencing?

Are the speakers of the shown quotes taken seriously? Are lines like "while you were wasting time being dead" intended to be interpreted as reasonable judgements of others' circumstances?

Is it likely that the tags are taking described offenses seriously? Out of the three shown quotes, why are OP's tags referencing one speaker specifically? What do phrases like "the most guy ever" convey about OP's opinion of that character?

How does user janestvalentine interpret the quoted tags? Given your answer to #3, is this a reasonable interpretation?

Of the original tags, which ones does user janestvalentine include or exclude in their quote? Is any information lost from excluded tags?

OP posted a screenshot edit attributing user janestvalentine's comments to a particular character. Discuss with a mutual familiar with GX: is this a usual comment that character would make? Given your answers to #2 and #5, why might OP have chosen to make this comparison?

Yugioh characters simply have no patience for your skill issues.

[some-other-number]

you have 'be gay do crime' in your bio but are you normal about poor people, especially poor people who have a different environment to you, doing things you deem unethical because that is the only available option

[taylorranhome]

tumblr users learn the difference between profit and income challenge

[oblique-lane]

Spy tf2 and his identity

Character analysis (or at least my vision on him, if you believe my reasoning)

What do we know about Spy? He's a disguise mastermind. He can pretend to be anyone in order to infiltrate into the scene to do his job - quite literally, stab people on the back. But when he's not in the battle, what is he to his teammates? A suave Frenchman, a gentleman with taste, somewhat a leader.

At least, that's the persona he prefers to show. But is he really..?

What if I tell you that this person never drops his disguise?

For a man who always wears a mask and who's identity being secret is a sacred part of his role in this job, isn't this persona too much to show if it is real? Frenchman, rich, ladykiller... Wouldn't it be too easy to decipher his identity with so much clues provided? Wouldn't it be dangerous?

While Miss Pauling and the Administrator definitely know Spy's real identity, hiding it is a major thing for whatever reason. One could assume it might be because of Scout (obvious guess) but I doubt he's a sole reason. Spy very much enjoys being the Spy all by himself. Do what's the deal?

Let's start from the beginning.

Why did Spy join Mann Co. in the first place?

Let's take this assumption as a fact: people come here out of desperation. They are professionals in their field, yet in their past/casual life there is a pattern of them having difficulties that push them into joining this service. I don't see why Spy would be an exception.

The reason for joining is usually money. Some people question why Spy, a wealthy man from higher society, would join Mann Co. if he has it all already.

Well, probably because he really does not.

Have you ever met an aristocrat? Wealthy people don't get so protective about their expensive suits, they can afford cleaning or a new one. Regardless, rich people don't usually get stingy about material goods, especially if they're mass produced.

At least, not those who were born into wealth.

Spy's defensiveness about his "wealthy stuff", his pomp-ness, disgust and arrogance towards "plebs" gives off a man who knows what it means to live in poverty and who doesn't want to be associated with it ever again.

(Not even talking about his own filthy habits such as not washing his mask and pissing on walls? Jesus Christ)

Dare I even guess that he might be not French at all? His French is so broken. (Although, so is Medic's German, but at least he uses his language much more frequently and in more complex sentences, while Spy only uses French to say some basic expressions, occasionally confusing them with other languages). Definitely not a native.

If anything, he's not giving "rich man" at all, he's giving con man. And that fits my picture perfectly.

So, poor upbringing. How old is Spy? If he's Scout's father (and he was young when he was conceived), I'd say he's no less than 20 years older than him. I'd give him a few more years actually. So, approximately Spy is around 50 at the events of the game (1968-1972). Let's assume he was born somewhere in the 1910s.

Even if he's not French, I still agree that he's probably European. Hmm, what was happening in Europe at the time Spy was a kid?

Oh yeah. The Great Depression.

See my picture: imagine, a child from a lower class family during the Great Depression, his parents were most likely to not take good care about him (both because of the economical situation AND as an echo to Spy's struggles with his own fatherhood). He has to run away from home early and start to make money. Any way possible.

Unavoidably, it leads to crime.

Petty theft, blackmail, scams. Changing identities. Selling low quality products and services. Changing identities again. When older, seducing rich women to stay at their homes overnight, be fed and supported. Running away from the police. Walking into a trap of the mafia, and then joining them as their goon.

In this nightmare of a life he just had to keep pretending to be someone else, someone better and stronger, in order to his ego to not completely shutter. He had to imagine he was an invincible mastermind trickster of some sort, not just a poor boo-hoo victim of poverty who has never knew normal life and care.

And if you pretend for long enough, you become your role eventually... Right?

His true self was long lost forgotten under many layers of new identities. Worse, his true self was never known. And he didn't want it to be known in its ugly and disgusting vulnerability. Narcissism became his lifeline.

It's so much better to be Spy. To be rich and elegant and respected. His ego rebuilt.

[satorusugurugurl]

If this request makes you uncomfortable or isn’t something you want to write, I apologize and please ignore my request!

Heyy! I was wondering if I could request a satoru x reader x Suguru smut? With like, some bdsm mixed in yk. Tying reader up, satoru is a tease, and likes to make her squirm and ask questions he know she can’t answer because Suguru is fucking her throat. But Suguru is mean. Mean and tougher than satoru. He tells satoru to stop being so gentle with you, that not only do you deserve rough treatment but you like it. And satoru listens to him, of course. I just want them to run through me like a train😞

Also same mean geto anon (again lol) I’m gonna just sign off w an emoji now :3 -🍭

Hi Anon!

This isn't my cup of tea, it's my FUCKING jam!!

Summary: Gojo and Geto had been on a two-week-long mission, which hadn't gone as smoothly as Suguru wanted. He was pent-up and frustrated. So, of course, Gojo called you to warn you it might not be a good idea to come over. You, of course, did not heed his warning. The second you get home, you realize that you were screwed.

Word Count: 3,706

Warnings: BDSM, rough sex, oral sex, so much sex, degradation, teasing, the smuttiest of smut

A/N: Good God, Satoru x Reader x Suguru is my weakness!! I put my whole heart into this. Geto Suguru, teacher AU, is my kryptonite!

Part Two

She Likes it Like That

“Y/N babe,” Gojo said in a hushed whisper, “you probably shouldn't come home tonight.”

You cocked an eyebrow, looking away from the first year's training. “I'm sorry, did you just tell me not to come home. . .to our apartment?” The world ‘our’ came out like acid.

Gojo sighed overdramatically. “Don't say it like that. I'm trying to save you! Suguru is in such a bad mood.” You listened to him walking around. “I sighed out loud when I noticed the last of my mochi was gone. Fuck you for that, by the way, and do you know what he said to me?” You pinched at the bridge of your nose, waiting for the rant to continue. “He told me to shut the fuck up! For sighing!”

“What did you do to piss him off? Oh, and just an FYI, I bought you more mochi, asshole.”

“Oh—” silence, “thank you-I’m sorry, please don't return it.”

“Satoru! Forget about the mochi. What happened to Sugu?”

The mission your partners were sent on did not go as planned. Their hotel had flooded; it was not like they had time to consider sleeping. The higher-ups sent them to an abandoned mountainside village full of cursed spirits. Poor Suguru had to swallow dozens for nearly two weeks. Gojo had enough; he couldn't stand the pained expression on his face as he gagged the last spirit down. So he decided to Hollow-Purpled the entire village.

The second they got back, the higher-ups scolded the hell out of them. Chastising them, complaining that they didn't do a good enough job. After all their hard work, the time they spent away from home, from you. Those bastards dared to complain about their hard work. It sent Suguru into a terrible mood, one that was bound to end with either a fight or someone getting fucked into the mattress.

One thing about Suguru was that when he was pissy, things felt out of his control. He needed to take control back. Which meant he wanted to have sex. He would be rough, really rough, tying either you or Satoru up, not letting you go until he had calmed down. Or if one of you was fucked too stupid to continue, his eyes focused on the other that wasn't tied up.

“So please, just stay with Ieiri tonight. I'm going to lock myself in my room. Last time he was this pissed off, the both of us were so sore we couldn't move.”

“Ugh, fuckin’ whatever.” This whole situation wasn't fair. You hated how your boyfriends were mistreated.

“Yeah, just stay the—oh, hi Suguru.” There was a shuffling in the background. “No, I wasn't talking shit.” Satoru nervously laughed. “Look, Sugu—no, put down the rope—”

“Toru?” Panic for your boyfriend sank into your stomach.

“Hey! Wait a second—Sugu—”

Before any other indication of what was happening came through the receiver, the other line cut off. So you quickly yelled to the students you had to leave and took off. By the time you made it, you were breathless from running and realized that in your panic, you left your keys at work.

You picked up the spare key hidden under the doormat. Just as you were about to unlock the door, it flew open. You slowly blinked, looking up at a very irritated Suguru. The man radiated gloom and tension. He was in his sweatpants, and his hair was tied in a messy bun, and, dear God, he looked pent up.

“Why the fuck are you using the spare key?”

“I-I uh—”

“Ooooh~ there she is~!” a hand gently rested against Suguru’s shoulder as Satoru peered down at you from behind your dark-haired boyfriend. “There's our girl!”

It only took a moment to see that Satoru mirrored Suguru’s frustration and anger. Oh fuck. The key fell from your hand as you took a step back. Suguru was demanding and rough when he was pent up. Satoru, on the other hand, was a tease. He liked pushing you, making you cry. Both of them being in a pissy mood simultaneously, this was a nightmare for you.

“Y-You, I thought you were in trouble!”

“Oh yeah, no.” Suguru’s soured face slowly twisted into a smirk as Satoru licked his lip. “But you~?” Suguru’s hand darted out, grabbing you by the front of your shirt, preventing you from moving further back. “You're royally fucked.” Before you even had a chance to respond, Suguru and Satoru grabbed you, yanking you inside.

“Awe~” Satoru hummed as he trailed his kiss up the bare thighs he lay between. “Look at you~ trying to clamp your thighs shut.” Gojo’s fingers were buried deep inside of you. Finger fucking you to the edge of yet another orgasm he would deny. “But you can't, can you~? Suguru’s got you all tied to the bed, spread out for us to use you.” A muffled moan escaped you. “Huh? What was that princess? You gotta use your big girl words.” Satoru tilted his head, cupping his free hand around the back of his ear. “Oooh! That's right, you can't talk when getting your throat fucked.”

You gagged as Suguru's cock hit the back of your throat. He was quiet, his eyes shut in concentration. He looked so fucking hot, so focused on the feeling of your mouth. Sweat was beading on his forehead as he pulled in and out of your mouth, grunting softly as you hollowed your cheeks. But the more Satoru spoke, the more Suguru knitted his eyebrows.

“I bet you want me to stuff your pussy, too, don't you~? You want to be spit-roasted between your two boyfriends?” Your pussy twitched at his words. “Oooh~!! Your cunt just twitched. Is that what our sweet girl wants—”

“Satoru,” Suguru snarled, “shut the fuck up.”

“Well, excuse the fuck out of me. Y/N likes it when I tease her.”

Suguru tsked, pulling his thick cock out of your mouth. You gasped and coughed, spit and precum coating your chin. Between your pants and the gasps for air, Suguru went to what you thought would be a head pat. Instead, his fingers tangled in your air with a hard yank, pulling you up to look down at Satoru. His face was flushed, cerulean eyes wide as he looked between his two partners.

“Look at the fucking slutty face she's making.” The grip on your hair tightened. “You think she looks like this because of your pitiful teasing?” A shaky moan escaped you as he tightened his grip harder. “No, she looks like this because this little slut likes it rough.”

Fuck, you wanted more, to run your hands over Suguru’s arms, to grip his cock, urging him to keep fucking your throat. You were desperate to trap Satoru's head firmly between your thighs, forcing him to kiss and lick your clit. Instead, you weakly tugged at the purple restraints tied to both your wrists and ankles. Suguru had set up the rigging underneath the mattress, making it impossible for you to move. Meaning if you wanted his cock back in your mouth or Satoru’s tongue inside of you, you had to wait for them.

What made it more frustrating was the fact that you were completely bare. Not allowing you to hide the way your body reacted to Suguru’s dirty words. He was telling the truth. And the truth was behind your body's reactions. Gojo could see it in the way your tight entrance clenched around his fingers. He could feel your pussy drip around him, your wetness running down his knuckles. Suguru was right; you did like it; no, like wasn't the right word.

You fucking loved it.

Suguru could see the wheels turning in Satoru’s head as his eyes glittered with lust and excitement. “Satoru~ do you finally see it?~” The way Suguru purred his name had Satoru’s cock throbbing. “You see why she came home, even though she knew she’d get fucked?”

“Yeah, yeah, she's a fucking slut.”

“Yeah, she is.” A sharp tug on your head made you yelp. Suguru grinned, cocking an eyebrow at you. “You want it rough? Want me to fuck your throat so hard you cry, pretty girl?”

“Y-Yes, please.”

Gripping his cock at the base, Suguru slapped his thick meat against your cheek. “That's a good girl. Now open up.” slowly, you opened your mouth to him. Watching your tongue slip out had his tip angry, throbbing red. “Now,” he smeared the beading precum over your bottom lip, “say ah~.”

“Ahh~” The second that sound left your pretty mouth Suguru shoved his cock in your mouth. Your eyes stung as tears filled your eyes.

Satoru’s fingers had stopped their slow movements inside of you. His mouth was dry as he gulped. Suguru had been rough before, but this was a whole new level. His thick fingers wrapped around your Y/H/C hair, holding your head in place. His hips pull back before slamming forward, his ass clenching with the force of each thrust. Blue eyes slowly trailed over to your face. Your eyes were red, big tears slowly down your cheeks, and your throat was fucked. Satoru swore he could see Suguru’s tip bulging in your slender neck.

This was fucking hot. Suguru’s bare back glittered in the low light of the bedroom, a sheen of sweat beaded over his toned muscles. It was like watching a god fuck a mortal Suguru radiated a dominating power as he watched their girlfriend choke and gag on his cock. Satoru’s cock was so hard it fucking hurt. Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around his throbbing shaft, jerking it slowly as he leaned down, kissing and nipping at your inner thighs.

The gentle kisses had you sighing contently around Suguru’s cock. Looking over his shoulder, Suguru sighed as he watched Satoru. His pink tongue was stuck out, gently teasing your damp folds. The sensation had you sighing around his dick, and that was not what he needed right this fucking second. Suguru wanted more; he needed it to relieve the tension in his shoulder. But that relief, the release he needed, wouldn’t happen, with Satoru teasing you like he loved to do.

“Satoru,” Suguru's voice was rough, “I just told you Y/N likes it rough.”

“Uh-huh~” Satoru’s voice was muffled as his face buried in your pussy, making you whine around the cock buried in your mouth.

“You’re not being rough enough.” Satoru pulled back, making you whine in protest. “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you want to come down here and eat Y/N’s pussy while I get my dick sucked?”

“No.” The cocky smile that was beginning to form on Satoru’s face was suddenly gone as Suguru reached his free hand down, wrapping his fingers in soft white hair. “I want you to fucking eat her cunt out like you fucking hate her.” Your eyes rolled back as Satoru was slammed back down into your pussy. The moan that left his mouth vibrated just right against our clit, making you cry out. “Ah~ fuck yes.” Your cries vibrated around Suguru’s cock, just the way he wanted. “That’s it, Satoru, keep it up.”

“Mmmmph.” Finally, having a picture of how Suguru wanted him to act, Satoru found himself motivated. Again, it might be because his boyfriend was tugging and pulling at his sensitive hairline. Yeah, that was motivating him. Fuck you like he hated you, he could do that. He was just as pent-up as Suguru was.

Fingers slammed inside your pussy, fucking in and out of your tight hole with a force and speed that had you crying out in pleasure. Your moans felt so fucking good, and the more you opened your mouth to cry, the deeper Suguru fucked your throat. He hit the back over and over again, his hand pressing firmly against Satoru’s head, pushing him harder against your clit. The two of you moaned while your mouths were being used; the sounds of whimpers, squelches, and gagging were like a symphony to Suguru’s ears.

Out of all the ways for him to relieve his stress, this was by far his favorite.

“Hah—fuck keep that up, Satoru, bring her right to the edge, then stop. I want her cumming with both of us inside of her. Fucking her so rough she has to call out of work tomorrow and Friday.” The thought of that had you pulling on your restraints. “Oooh oh, you like that? You like knowing the two of us will make sure you can’t walk or talk tomorrow?” Your muffled moans were quickly molded into gags as Suguru roughly fucked your face. “Yeah, you fucking do, you nasty little slut.”

Your mind was spinning as you felt yourself climbing closer and closer to your orgasm. The room was so hot and reeked of sex. It was all you could do not to allow yourself to cum right then and there. Satoru could feel it, the way your little swollen clit throbbed against his tongue, how your walls clamped down on his fingers. He wanted to send you over the edge. He was close to following you as he fucked his hips helplessly into the mattress, wishing it was your wet pussy instead.

One orgasm wouldn’t hurt, would it? You had been so good to them, allowing the duo to drag you into the house, strip you in the entryway, and tie you to the bed. Plus, on top of all that, they had left you alone for two weeks. You had to rely on that stupid vibrator Suguru insisted on allowing you to keep. That stupid toy was nothing compared to his tongue. Which was probably why he was bringing you to a mind-blowing orgasm in under three minutes.

Yeah, he was going to let you cum.

Curling his fingers up into your g-spot, Satoru fucked you as fast as his wrist would allow. Suguru instantly knew what was happening. From the way your eyes shut to how loud you were moaning around him, you were seconds away from cumming. If he was in a better mood, he might have allowed it to happen. Unfortunately, he wasn’t done with you yet.

“Stop.” Suguru scolded, pulling Satoru away from your dripping sex.

Both you and Satoru made disapproving groans as your orgasm slowly faded out of sight. “Doesn’t she deserve a treat? She’s been so good!” Satoru whined, licking your juices off his lips.

“I agree. Y/N does deserve a reward. But you need to give it to her in the roughest way that you can.” Suguru pulled his cock out of your mouth, allowing you to catch your breath. “Look at it this way. We get to blow off the steam while we make up for making her play with herself for two weeks.”

“Huh?” Those words struck a different chord in Satoru, and his cock twitched.

“Y/N, sweetheart, how often would you say you played with yourself when we were gone.”

You swallowed at the air greedily. “I don’t know, seven, maybe eight times.” Both your boyfriends shuddered, hearing the hoarseness of your voice.

“And out of all of those times, did you cum as hard as you do with us.”

“Not at all. They were all baby orgasms.”

Suguru shut his eyes, nodding his head. “See, Satoru, not only does our little slut like us rough and demanding, but we have to make up for those eight little orgasms.” When the dark-haired man looked back at Satoru, he saw a flash of white before your scream of shock and please bounced off the walls.

Suguru’s eyes were slightly wide as his brain tried to catch up with what his eyes had just witnessed. What he saw was Satoru balls deep inside of you. His thrusts were sloppy and needy, and fuck you looked as stunned as Suguru. One second you had been empty, pussy craving a cock deep inside of it from the denied orgasm. In the blink of an eye, Satoru was fucking into you more brutal than he’d ever fucked you before.

“I fucking told you, that toy was nothing compared to us.” Satoru snarled against the crook of your neck, digging his teeth into the sensitive skin. “Fucking stupid toy, not pleasing my girl.”

“Oh my—fuck, holy fuck!” You cried out, mouth wide open. Giving Suguru the perfect opportunity to get back to fucking your throat. The bittersweet taste of pre-cum had your mouth watering. He returned to the brutal pace he was in several minutes again.

“She needs that Satoru. What if we get sent on another long mission? She’s just supposed to suffer?” The thought of that had Suguru tilting his head, bangs falling in front of his eye. “You know what, I think you might be on to something. If we take her toy away, then we’d have to fuck her even harder the next time we get home.”

Satoru’s teeth sank harder into your neck as the tip of his cock slammed almost too hard into your cervix, making you scream around Suguru. “Exactly. Let me use reversal red on it, Y/N, please, baby.” You started to shake your head in a desperate plea to let you keep it. But Suguru’s cock in your throat made it impossible to do so. “What was that? Oh, right, you have your mouth full.” His lips moved against your pulse as his fingers dug into your hips. “Guess we’ll just have to say the way your clamping down on my cock is a yes in our book.” Your eyes darted up to Suguru, who had bought you the toy, for help.

“Mhmm fuck, yeah, I’m pretty sure she just hummed an ‘uh-huh’ around my cock.”

You wanted to argue, to fight against this rash decision, but you felt so good it was almost impossible to care. You were screaming around Suguru’s cock. Tears streaming down your face, leaving behind trails of mascara. They were both being so mean and rough. God, it was so fucking good. Who cared about a clit sucker when your throat and pussy were being fucked into next week.

“She’s close.” Satoru cried out, his balls slapping against your ass. “Oh fuck she’s hugging my cock so tight I’m going to explode Suguru.”

With blurry eyes, you glanced up at Suguru. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes shut tight. “I know, oh fuck I know, I’m so close, Satoru, don’t fuckin’ stop, make her cum, make her cum so hard.” Both his hands grabbed your face fucking your throat roughly as Satoru cried out, his hand pressing roughly on your clit, rubbing it in fast circles.

That was all that you needed. You cried out, squirting all over Satoru’s crotch, abdomen, and the mattress. Your orgasm set a domino effect between your boyfriends. Suguru followed behind you, his body hunched over you, his hands gently squeezing your head as he filled your mouth full of his thick cum. You weakly tried swallowing all of it, but that was somewhat difficult as Satoru extended your orgasm.

His thumb continues to rub your clit until his face scrunch up, mouth open in a feral growl. Satoru's orgasm hit him like a punch in the gut. He fucked all three of you harder, closer to oblivion. The headboard slamming against the wall as the restraint dug into your wrists was the only thing grounding you to remain on Earth. Satoru didn’t let up on the rough thrusts until he felt his cum dripping around his cock onto the bed.

The throbbing pain in the back of your throat, deep inside of your pussy was all the confirmation you needed that your boyfriends had fulfilled their promise. Never in your life had you been fucked so roughly. But it was a pain that you warmly welcomed.

After coming down, Suguru was the first to move gently. The rough hands that had been holding you in a vice gently held you as he pulled his softening cock out of your mouth. “Lay down.” His gruff, gentle voice whispered as he helped rest you against a pillow.

“Oh fuck—“ Satoru lifted his head off your shoulder, “I haven’t cum that hard in a while.” He was so slow, pulling out of you, grimacing as you cried out. “Sorry, fuck I’m sorry, baby.”

You shut your eyes, listening to Satoru getting out of bed. You could hear water running in the bathroom as gentle fingers began undoing your restraints. “You did such a good job, Y/N,” Suguru whispered. “Such a good girl for us.” His praise had you humming happily as he made quick work of the rest of the ropes.

“Suguru, let’s order in, yeah?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

The next half hour was a blur of warm happiness. Satoru helped wash your body in a bubble bath before Suguru joined you, kneeling next to the tub, lovingly stroking your face and hair. After you were cleaned up, your hair brushed, and pajamas on. You crawled into your bed with fresh sheets and relaxed. Satoru and Suguru fluffed your pillows and brought you a cup of tea for your raw throat. When your dinner arrived, the three of you sat in bed together to eat as a B-grade horror movie played on the television.

After eating, Satoru left to throw out the take-out containers. “Mmm, thank you for letting us do all that,” Suguru said as he crawled into bed after his shower. “That mission, it was rough.”

“I’m always happy to help.” Your voice cracked, making Suguru frown. “Stop frowning,” you flicked his forehead. “I like it rough.”

The bed dipped, and Satoru wrapped his arms around your waist. “Y/N can handle it. She is dating the two strongest, after all.” Both you and Suguru scoffed, relaxing in the growing silence. “Oh, by the way, Y/N.”

“Yeah?” You yawned, snuggling into Suguru’s chest as he turned the bedside lamp off.

“Did you bring home my mochi?”

In the dark of the room, you heard a thump and Satoru’s whine before Suguru pulled the three of you closer to him. “Satoru shut the fuck up about the mochi.”

[have-you-seen-my-sanity]

Hi! Can you write a fic where Steven and Marc are jealous of each other about who loves the reader more and who's better in bed? Maybe they could confront reader too

pls make it smutty if you're okay with that

Hello!! <3

Let's see who's better

Steven Grant & Marc Spector x fem!reader

Warnings: Jealousy, p in v, soft dom Steven, oral fem!receiving, smut, nsfw, happy ending.

Steven just got out of the bathroom after a refreshing shower, your sleeping form caught his attention.

"She looks so beautiful asleep. Love her so much." Steven smiled.

Meanwhile Marc felt the need to take part.

*Me too, buddy.*

Steven turned to look in the mirror, seeing indeed Marc with a cheeky smile on his face.

"I love her more."

*No I do.*

"Not a chance mate."

*I met her first.*

"Bloody hell, Marc."

Marc just gave an arrogant smirk.

"If you think that, then let's just ask her."

*You challenging me now, buddy?*

"You bloody bet I did, mate."

*Did you bump your head?*

"No, of course not! Did you?"

Marc and Steven were so into arguing, they didn't notice you waking up.

"Boys? What are you yapping about?"

*Great, you just woke her up.*

"You're the worst." Steven scoffed, returning to the bedroom. "Sorry love, Marc and I were just uh, making bets..."

You raised your eyebrow "Sounded like a sudden deep hatred."

Steven shrugged. "You know how we can get sometimes."

"Yeah, sometimes you two are acting like an old couple." You chuckled.

"Are we that bad?" Steven fiddled with his fingers, making a nervous expression.

"No! You're simply too innocent, Stevy!" You laughed, getting out of the bed and hugging him.

Steven was actually surprised, but he loved the affection from you. While you hugged him, he turned to look back at the mirror to see Marc's face.

Marc's mouth was opened in a surprised manner, he raised a finger as if he wanted to say something, but for once he couldn't come up with anything.

Steven shot Marc an arrogant smile, Marc's jaw clenched and he crossed his arms, looking offended.

Steven couldn't help but laugh a bit.

You nudged his foot with yours. "What's so funny?" you asked with amusement.

"Marc's offended like a child because I emptied all of his aftershave." Steven lied but played it cool.

You snorted before bursting out in laughter. "Wait what?" you gently pulled away. "Poor guy, but he will get over it." you chuckled.

"You're right, he will get over it." Steven said, his tone was laced with pure amusement and arrogance. He glanced back to the mirror, seeing Marc narrowing his eyes dangerously and scowling back at Steven.

"Is he pissed now?" You asked.

"Not even Khonshu would dare mess with him now, pissed is not even close." He lied.

"I never expected you to be so cruel Steven, maybe you should make it up to him." You smiled before heading over to Gus to feed him.

*Yeah you heard her. Make it up to me. Give me the body.* Marc said in their shared headspace.

Steven saw you heading to the couch, flopping down. He took the opportunity to get back to the bathroom again.

"No, I'll stay with her."

*I'm the main. I get to choose.*

"Not now."

*Fuck, who did something to you?*

"You did."

Marc scoffed.

"Steven!? You pissing off Marc again?" They heard you call out.

Steven just left the bathroom and sat down next to you on the couch.

You raised an eyebrow. "Damn, what's up with you two today? Who did you kill?"

"No one." Steven replied a bit nervous.

"Stevennn! Speak with me, what's wrong?" You straightened, turned to face him and crossed your legs.

Steven took a deep breath. "Which one of us do you like more?" he asked carefully.

You tilted your head, giving him a confused look. "Are you kidding me?"

"Nope, houndred percent real."

"Not gonna answer that. I love you both."

"Let's say you have to save one of us, who would it be?"

"You two are one body, it's a two in one, that means I'll save both of you." You shrugged. "Now spill it, what's happening between you two?"

"Alright. Marc and I were arguing on which one of us loves you more." Steven sighed.

"And you two really thought I'd only love one of you?" You asked.

*Hold on. Steven ask her who's better in bed. This way she can't come up with the one body excuse.* Marc told Steven, who looked back in the direction of the bathroom.

"Oh my god..."

You figured Marc must have said something to Steven "What did he say?"

"Well, he uh... he asked who's better in bed.." Steven stammered.

You shot a flabbergasted look. "For the protocol..." you squinted your eyes and raised one finger, "you two wanted to know which one I love more. Now it looks like you finally accepted and made peace knowing I love both of you," you paused "and now you want to know which one fucks better?"

Steven nodded.

"Hell no, I'm not gonna answer that."

"Because that one body argument you made doesn't count for sexy time, right love?" Steven smiled teasingly.

"You are unfair. Both of you." You wagged with your finger.

*We got her. Now we have to see who's better.*

"Don't be shy love. Speak." Steven grinned.

"Fine. But I will make it fair. So don't even think about being upset."

"Alright." Steven agreed.

"Marc when I had a rough day, you when it's a normal day."

*Interesting...*

"Really?" Steven teased.

"Happy now?"

"Think you're able to choose?" Steven scooted a bit close.

"Nuh-uh, don't you fucking dare." You uncrossed your legs, scooting back.

"I bet this will make you rethink." Steven gently grabbed your ankles, pulling you close to him, hooking his fingers under your sleeping pants and pulled them down along with your panties.

"Steven?"

"No no, don't think, just focus on me, yeah?" Steven spreaded your legs and leaned down between your legs.

"W-wait not- o-oohh fuck..." Steven didn't even let you finish, he dipped right in, lapping at your pussy, licking and sucking like a starved man about to die.

Steven was licking so intense, your thighs snapped shut around his head.

"Feels good yeah? Wait till I fuck this cunt." Steven moaned against you, his tongue thrusting into your hole as deep as possible.

"What's gotten into you, Steven?" You slured out, already feeling your orgasm building up.

"You. Just you." He smiled, his hand coming up to rub your clit.

"Oh fuck! Steven you're so good!" You're already seeing stars, Steven's demonstrations on you we're almost too much.

"Can feel you getting tight around my tongue." Steven's hand came up, rubbing your clit, determined to bring you over the edge.

"Shit! Steven I'm about to cum!" You cried out in pleasure, your eyes rolling back as you couldn't take it any longer, gushing your juices into Steven's mouth.

"Yeah that's it, love." Steven's greedy mouth slurped every last drop of your orgasm up. He got up, licking the remains of your juices from his lips.

"Ready for another one?" He asked teasingly, kneeling between your legs, you could already see his hard cock straining.

"You're driving us mad, y'know that?" He reached down, pulling his raging cock out and positioned himself on top of you.

"And I bet you like it right?" Steven grabbed and lined his cock at your swollen pussy.

"Wait so you two are just kidding?" You asked, still slightly out of breath.

"No, that's real. But you like seeing us jealous, hm?" Steven pushed inside you, already setting quite a fast pace.

You let out a gasp at the overstimulation. "You're starting to get as dirty as Marc." you chuckled.

"Yeah? Good." Steven teased, he slowed down a bit, aiming for deep and hard thrusts.

"Oh god, Steven..." Your eyes fluttered shut, Steven hit your spots with each thrust.

"Told you, love." He teased, rolling his hips just right to make your mind go cockdrunk. Steven continued to switch between slow and deep thrusts and hard and fast ones.

You felt your peak build up once again, tightening around Steven's cock. He felt it and sped up, hitting all your sweetspots as he felt himself getting close too.

"Stevennn!" It wasn't long before you clenched around him and drowned his dick in your juices.

"Fuck, feels so good.." Steven moaned, releasing himself into you before stopping his movements.

"Are you happy now?" You chuckled.

"Only if you say I am the best." He teased.

"Fine, have it." You spoke without thinking before your eyes widened and you remembered Marc as your mind came back to it's senses. "Shit."

"Good answer, thanks love." Steven smiled. "Marc, better accept it."

*Nope. I didn't even had my chance yet...* Marc spoke lowly in the headspace.

You got up, put only your panties back in and made your way to the bathroom to clean up. You didn't know where Steven went, but as left the bathroom and were about to pass the bed you heard a voice.

"Honeeyy." Marc's voice hit your ears sharp. As you turned around, he was already there.

"Hi." You played it cool.

"Hey there." Marc gave a dirty smile.

"Let me guess, you want your piece of the cake now?"

"Yeah. After that we'll see who's better." He stopped infront of you, leaning in close. "And now, get on the bed, spread your legs and let me fuck you stupid."

You obeyed, laying down on the bed, slipped off your panties and opened your legs.

"You two are the worst when you're jealous at eachother."

Marc stepped between your legs, reaching down to run two fingers along your folds, making you whimper. "Means your pussy's getting spoiled."

"Funny."

"Yeah." He joked.

Marc was already hard, he couldn't wait any longer, freeing himself and positioned his cock at your hole, nudging you with his tip. He entered slowly, making you gasp. "O-ooh fuck, Marc..."

"Mhh-mm.." He hummed, slowly starting to roll his hips. The pleasure came back, causing your head to fall back.

He grabbed your hips for leverage, slamming his cock in and out of you. "Can you feel yourself getting cockdrunk, hm?"

"Can't help it." You slured with half your mind drifting off into numbness.

"That's my girl." Marc praised, pulling his cock almost all the way out and slamming right back into your depths.

"Ohh my ggod!" You moaned, arching your back.

Marc leaned down "Honey, I want you to say I'm better in bed if you wanna cum." He demanded, using your current state of mind for his advantage.

You couldn't say anything, the only thing you could do, was moaning.

He chuckled. "Can't think straight, huh?"

You shook your head, getting louder as Marc set a fast pace, hitting the spots deep inside. You gripped the sheets, biting your lip as you tried to say what he wanted in order for him to make you cum.

"You're b-better M-Marc..." You moaned, feeling desperate to cum.

"I'm better?" He increased his pace, feeling his orgasm approach.

Your pussy tightened around Marc's cock. "Yess, please let me cum!"

Marc grinned. "Such a good girl for me. Now cum on my cock."

As if on command, your pussy clamped down on his cock, squeezing tight.

"There you go, baby." He groaned, releasing his cum into you.

Marc stayed inside you while catching his breath, and then pulled out of you. "Fuck... now you may take a shower." he chuckled.

You panted, taking your time to catch your own breath. "I earned that shower."

"Looks like you did." He nodded, tucking himself back in and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Made up your mind yet?" He ruffled your hair, smirking down at you.

"You share. Get used to it, you and Steven. I'm not a fan of choosing." You sat up on the bed.

Marc let out a breath, looking at the mirror in the bathroom. "Fine. Steven wanna quit this shit and just accept it? Boss lady demands it."

*Yeah, let's get this over with. But hey, we spoiled her.* Steven chuckled.

"You're right." Marc grinned.

You just raised an eyebrow. "Hey you two, what are you talking about."

Marc looked at you, his hands moved to gently pull you up. "Nothing, we agreed we will be friends again. No more fooling around. Now go get your shower." He gently ushered you before he softly smacked your ass.

You, amused, shook your head at them, making your way into the bathroom for your well deserved shower for the day.

[popponn]

call you later; 1.

notes: what if you didn't pick up their call? they left a voicemail, in their own ways. characters: isagi yoichi, itoshi sae, seishirou nagi. [ part 2 : rin, bachira ]

isagi yoichi

Probably felt a little bit sad you didn’t pick up. You are probably his first crush—and only, for a long time, maybe, and this boy is committed with capital C when he is into something—so don’t be too hard on him. Like, hey, his #2 after the soccer itself didn’t pick up his phone? Poor guy.

But like the considerate boy off the pitch he is, Yoichi will immediately give you a brief of what he wanted to tell you before leaving the classic note of ‘i will call you again later’. It won’t be overly long, as he prefers to talk to you rather than to the empty void of a voicemail. Or at least he intends so to seem polite and proper, until he stutters and tripped all over his words a little bit. It’s cute though.

All in all, probably one of the most normal guy from Blue Lock, as usual, and whatever sad feelings he had from getting his call not being picked up will be gone the moment he got the chance to talk to you. A little advice, just make sure to actually call him later—knowing you reach out to him as soon as you can will make Mr. Egoist pretty happy.

“Uh, so… are you busy? Wait—you are not picking up of course you are busy…” Yoichi trailed off with a nervous laugh. “But, so, anyway, about our promise to walk around Saitama, I was wondering if your schedule is free this Sunday? I got two weeks off Blue Lock but I kinda want to make sure we can do it as soon as we can, so if anything comes up—ah, but I didn’t mean it in a bad way!”

It took Yoichi a few seconds to gather his composure before he continued, “I mean, uh, yeah, I just want to do it with you soon. I will call you again so we can talk about it later! Work hard, or have a good time! See you!”

itoshi sae

First of all, how dare you. He is famous and probably have people lining up for his number while you get him punching your number and didn’t pick up. Just for that, Sae might throw a tantrum, albeit a silent one.

On a more serious note, he will raise an eyebrow honestly, especially if you are the type to usually answer. But he is pretty independent most of the time, so he will only left a few words on the voice mail. In some occasions, though, when he just calls for the sake of listening to you, he will feel a little bit down. You can cheer him up later—you should, actually. Sometimes talking with Sae requires advanced mind reading technique and when he is a little bit down or pissed you really have to use that skill. Because boy, this guy is pretty constipated emotionally.

So, end notes, just call him real soon, okay? He might act cold and tough but he is also someone whose favorite show is Chibi Maruko-chan. He won’t say much in the voicemail or act like it afterwards, but he might really wait for you to call back, especially if he didn’t hear anything from or about you for a day. Though, honestly, just call him back or answer his next call before five seconds so everyone could be saved from his scathing vocabularies.

“What do you want for dinner? I’m picking you up later,” Sae said without wasting a second. “Hurry up and decide, then call me soon, got it? And in case you are thinking of anything funny, finish whatever you are working on first, then call me as soon as possible.”

For a moment, it was as if he was done. Then, a few beats of silence passed and he continued, “…and honestly… nevermind. Just call me soon.”

nagi seishirou

Yeah, let’s be real—he won’t leave a note and just give up. He willed out energy to call you first and you asked more from him? Wow. The fucking audacity.

But, let’s say, he really really wants to talk to you at the time and is in a really really really good mood—it will be long, if only for the long pauses. He will speaks sparsely, like the personification of bullet notes, as he doesn’t really see the point in talking if you are not really there to begin with. But, at the same time, Nagi Seishirou is also a Blue Lock egoist and he thinks having you listen to his voice note for a long time is not exactly a bad thought.

In the end, though, he really just want to hear your voice, actually. So, sooner or later, he will end the note with a ‘call me soon’ and plays a few games while waiting for you. The guy really need to recharge whatever small battery he has with you, so you really better call back if you don’t want to deal with a pouty Nagi holding a petty grudge for three minutes. And come on, do it for Reo, dude has way too much on his plate already.

“Eh, why are you not picking up?” Seishirou started with a complain, before immediately staying silent for a long time. Clearly on purpose, rather than for trying to remember something. “…I want to talk to you, so call me later, ‘kay?” he continued, in the end. “Choki also misses you by the way. You love Choki, right? So you really better call me back.”

Then, as an afterthought, he added, “Oh, I also have something I want to show you. So, let’s meet up next week. That’s all. Later.”

[rosakuma]

DRDT EP 14 Thoughts(spoilers of course 😋)

I’m about to go insane

Okay for starters…..I’d like to apologize to the Hu nation and the Eden!cultprit truthers. To be fair, she was very sus before we clarified Nico’s murder attempt. To which damn Nico, I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt only because it was strange how you held that wire, but it makes sense now knowing the reason. Man I feel awful for a lot of people here in this episode. Nico regrets trying to kill Ace even if they dislike him because he reminded them of the people who hurt Nico before(peers, teachers, and their father OOF). And now they gotta live with having “Almost murder” stuck to their name while also losing a potential friendship with Rose(we NicoRose shippers lost dang it). Poor Rose feeling guilty of her memory being out of shape(the poor girl is traumatized by remembering the clear deaths, I don’t blame her) and getting blames for it. But thank goodness my goat/best girl Teruko with some good old character development came in and reassured Rose that she is useful and it’s not her fault(Us TerukoXRoss shippers fricken WON!). David while still being an ass that I hate(albeit now feel more sympathetic towards) I feel bad for witnessing Arei’s body first….god no wonder why he’s so mad at the killer, I’m pissed at them too. And then there’s Ace….this episode turn me into the 1# Ace Markey defender. My poor man has been suffering this chapter and things keep getting worse for him. He pushes everyone away thanks to his paranoia, has a eating disorder no one notices which is hurting him, was ALMOST MURDERED with no one worried about him(hell Hu fricken defended his potential murder rather than reprimanding them!), and worse of all, the one person he thought who cared about him in this terrible place admitted he doesn’t care if he lives or dies….oh and now he’s being accused of killing Arei. F*ck Ace’s life is so tragic. Oh yeah speaking of the killer. EDEN HOW DARE YOU, I BELIEVED IN YOU!! She is 100% the murder and it makes me so sad and sick seeing how well she’s able to make Teruko take her side. She even hugged her like Min did(I am going to be sick). I will say, Arei would respect the hustle and manipulation though. Well done Eden, you impressed your would’ve been bestie. I might make another post about why Ace can’t be the killer unless someone beats me to it, but yeah it’s Eden. No way Ace is the killer and it sucks how David despite revealing his true colors is still able to manipulate everyone(bro gonna out do Kokichi Ouma man).

[yournewlodger]

I think the self-built criminal empire "drag yourself up by the bootstraps" ification of Oswald Cobblepot is indicative of a larger problem with Batman that refuses to address that hey, maybe billionaire politicians who hoard all the wealth with a refusal to relate to or in any way help the less fortunate, are bad maybe. Like of course the Penguin is a self-made criminal immigrant mob boss, because these days you can only be a Batman villain if you are 1.) Mentally Ill or 2.) An Immigrant. And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with characters being immigrants. Before you say "how dare you piss on the poor" please understand I'm talking about intent when you see these characters always presented as villains.

And I'm all for reimagining characters for the modern lens, and I fully understand the inherent problematic nature of a character like The Penguin, and maybe I will be Bobo the Fool when The Penguin (the show) comes out, but I think reframing the Penguin as something out of The Godfather severely misses the point. Not only because never more have I wanted superhero media to critique billionaire criminal politicians running for public office (historically, the Penguin's whole bit), but because we don't need the Penguin to be something out of The Godfather. We have someone for that already. And clearly they know that. Because his name is Carmine Falcone.

I think that this notion that the only crime in Gotham City has to be drugs, prostitution, human trafficking, and domestic terrorism severely misunderstands the inherent whimsical nature of superheroes, and historically the Penguin. I mean we are circlejerking into infinity a self-hatred in superhero media. His name isn't even Oswald Cobblepot anymore. When's the last time the Penguin had an umbrella?

And here's the thing. I like Gotham (2014 - 2019). I do. But that universe at least understood that the Penguin is aesthetically ridiculous. Try as they may to present him as a threat, but he will always be a guy who calls himself Penguin.

I do think this problem started with Batman Returns. I'm not here explicitly to critique that version of the Penguin, but I do think it's where we began to lose the plot. Because once again the Penguin is presented as an underdog, a minority, an outcast. And again I ask you to think about intent when the Penguin is a villain and Batman is not. But that movie had Max Shreck to balance it out. What do we have now?

They are so, so allergic to presenting the rich as villains, because they'd be calling themselves out. Because calling the Penguin what he is, a cartoonish portrayal of a wealthy Gilded Age capitalist who preys on the less fortunate to further and further elevate his own wealth, doesn't align with their messaging, which is "billionaires are so awesome, and more importantly, infallible." The Penguin is meant to be an antithesis to Bruce Wayne, who is also generationally wealthy, but most importantly a philanthropist. Bruce Wayne is supposed to be someone who dedicates all he has to making Gotham City a better place, which also includes helping reform Gotham’s villains. But these days we see a man who more and more seems less like a hero, and more like a Penguin. Because if Bruce Wayne cared about Gotham City, really cared, beating every one of his villains to a pulp, just shy of his "no kill" quota, would be less of his focus. I mean how does a man with near unlimited resources allow institutions like Arkham Asylum to exist, let alone send his bad guys there?

And yeah, I know. The answer is the Batman mythos has turned it into The Good Place. His world is too complicated to do any real good. And yes, I know, it mirrors our world too. But why is it that the people who are pointing out that corruption, these We Live In A Society types, the villains? Why are they always the one presented as "insane" for pointing out what's right in front of them? And when's the last time Bruce Wayne did charity work, anyway? Tell me, who are we supposed to be rooting for in the end?

Anyway, the summary is this: The Penguin isn't a Capitalist anymore. The Penguin isn't even a Cobblepot anymore. Who is he? Because he isn't the Fine Feathered Fink I know. And we all know why. And personally, I'm sick of it.

[canirove]

My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 12

Author's note: Sorry about these chapters being so short btw 🙈 I could put two together, but then the story would be shorter, and what is going to be happening next makes more sense the way it is divided right now. So... yeah. Sorry 🫣

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"Merry Christmas, neighbour."

"Merry Christmas, Rúben" I smiled.

"Did you check if I'm under your tree?" 

"Haven't gone downstairs yet, but that doesn't look like my grandma's living room" I said, squinting my eyes at my phone's screen. "And who said you were what I asked Father Christmas for?"

"Oh, yes. Why ask for something that already is yours" he said with that smirk of his. Thank God it was still dark in my room and he couldn't properly see how badly I was blushing. "Any news about your parents?"

"Nope, nothing. Only that my uncle and his family will come later to say hello."

"Are they team dad too?"

"They are team I don't want to get in trouble. But what about you? How did the night go?"

"It was ok, just the four of us."

"Any plans for today?"

"My mum is cooking, so that will definitely cheer us all. And I'll stop by Lucy's place to give Julia her present."

"What did you get her?"

"A new Elsa costume with a wig and heels."

"Oh, she's gonna love it. And drive us all crazy with the noise those heels are gonna make."

"Well, the one living downstairs is Mrs. Jones, so I don't feel sorry for her."

"Rúben!" I laughed. "Poor woman, she's just alone and wants some attention from a hot young man."

"Did you just call me hot?" 

"I... My grandma is calling me."

"Yeah, sure" he chuckled.

"It's true." And as if hearing me, she opened my room's door, turning on the light.

"Sorry to interrupt, sweetie, I heard you laughing" she said. "Are you ready for breakfast?"

"One minute."

"Say hello to your grandma" Rúben said.

"Who is that? Are you talking with a man?" grandma asked, her eyes going wide.

"It's just an Instagram video."

"And why did I hear the word grandma? Who is he?"

"No one."

"Then why is your face so red?" 

"Grandma, it is no one" I insisted.

"Ok... I'll see you downstairs" she said, closing the door.

"Thank you for that, Rúben."

"I was just being polite" he said with an innocent smile.

"Don't you dare smile at me like that" I said, trying to sound pissed. "She's not gonna let it go, you know? She's probably telling my grandad downstairs already."

"And?"

"Yesterday they spent hours trying to find me a boyfriend among the Arsenal players. If they find out I’m talking with a man…"

"You were talking with a friend that happens to be a man. I don't know why you can't tell them that" he shrugged.

"Because they won't believe me. In case you haven't noticed, the colour of my face gives it all away."

"So they'll know you fancy me."

"I don't..."

"You don't like me? C'mon. You've said it yourself, your face gives it all away. And if you didn't like me, you wouldn't have kissed me back. You wouldn't have let me kiss you at all."

“I just… I…”

“You like me. Say it. Make it my Christmas present.”

“What?”

“Repeat after me: I like you, Rúben.”

“I…”

“Yes?” he said while arching an eyebrow, that smirk of his starting to show.

“Fine. I like you, Rúben” I said, covering my face with my free hand the moment those words left my mouth.

“You are so cute” he laughed. “Thank you for making my Christmas morning ten times better.” 

“Yeah, sure” I chuckled, still avoiding to look at him on my screen.

“You did. Anyway, I gotta go check on Ivan. Keep me updated about your day, ok?”

“You too.”

“Merry Christmas, neigbour.”

“Merry Christmas, Rúben.”

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“So, who is he?” grandad asked the moment I sat down to have breakfast.

“Who is… Grandma!”

“We have no secrets, sweetie” she shrugged. “And to be honest, your smile right now would have told us something happened, and you know you are the worst at keeping secrets.”

“He is just a friend who happens to be a man, nothing else” I said, repeating what Rúben had told me earlier.

“I’ve never seen you smile like that after speaking with any of your other friends, boys or girls” grandma said. “He must be special.”

“I’m smiling because he made a joke and I was still thinking about it, not because I fancy him.”

“What’s his name?” grandad asked.

“Does it matter?”

“We’ll call him Mr. X, then.”

“Please don’t” I quickly said. “It sounds…”

“Like the name of someone who does movies for adults” grandma giggled.

“Ok, fine. Then at least tell us the first letter of his name.”

“R.”

“Mr. R? Nah, that sounds weird. Richard. Let’s call him Richard. Rich. Richy.”

“Ricky, like Ricky Martin” grandma said. “Is he as attractive as Ricky Martin?”

“The poor girl probably doesn’t know who Ricky Martin is, love” grandad said. “She is too young.”

“I know who he is. But we can call him Richy.” The idea of calling someone the size of Rúben, Richy, was too funny. “And he isn’t ugly.”

“Oh, she is finally telling us something! How did you meet?” grandma asked.

“He is our neighbour.”

“So he is attractive and posh.”

“He isn’t posh.”

“Attractive and rich. He is a catch” grandma winked. “What does he do for a living?”

“He…” I couldn’t say that he was a football player. They would go nuts. “He works for Manchester City.” Which wasn’t a lie. 

“Is he a football player?” grandad asked, raising his voice. “Which players do I know whose name starts with an R?”

“I said that he works for them, not that he is a player.”

“What does he do, then? Work office? If he is living in that building, he must have one of the big and important jobs” grandma said.

“Something like that, yes. I don’t know the details.”

“Rodri?” grandad asked.

“Who?”

“That’s the only City player I know whose name starts with an R. Is he your neighbour? He is Spanish, so is Lucy, and you speak Spanish. It makes sense.”

“She was speaking with him in English, not Spanish. And besides, she said he isn’t a player, he does office work” grandma pointed out.

“Shame. He doesn’t look like a bad lad. Though Ramsdale is way better, you’ll see” grandad said, back to eating his breakfast.

And that’s where the conversation ended, with him going back to talking about tomorrow's game and how excited he was about me meeting Ramsdale. 

[11queensupreme11]

Queen how does it feel to be a genius?

Girl, I'm here, reading and being so 😈

(Queen, I almost made this anonymous cause... I'm really horny? And I didn't know!?)

Cause you know I'm a Poseidon's bitch but also uncle Hades you're doing a pretty good job with my girl you the reason she forgets about blondes

Like, having sex (that was sex, no matter if you say it wasn't) without penetration cause he knows he'd keep doing it, no matter what the consequences are?

*horny grip*

(Hades, making Percy cum with his finger the moment Poseidon enters... He doesn't stop and Percy is just squirting while telling Poseidon to not see...)

My girl would be having the time of her life with them, good for her

Now, in my mind, Hades makes a party and invites Poseidon, just to have his child distracting him meanwhile he's licking Percy in the other room

Now, Percy sleeping in Poseidon and Hades tits? Girl, leave some for the rest

Also, is the knowledge SHE IS STILL WET WHILE HER FATHER TAKES HER TO HOME

Percy just prays that nothing comes down her cause she doesn't have panty (cue to Hades masturbating to them) and Poseidon being 🤨 cause he knows his brother's niece kink but like, he wouldn't dare... Right?

Now, if I was writing fanfiction about your fic? Poseidon would sit her down on his dick and "teach" her about being pure and not letting lost herself to lust

Poor Percy ends trembling and crying to the end of it

But I'm not (?) So I'm just giggling at your work and encouraging Poseidon to make SOMETHING!

I knew it was going to be good, but no do good, you throw me back to my Wattpad era

Also, Loki panicking cause he lost her and what if she ends up participating in the orgy? That would be karma right there

Loki: fortunately, you didn't do anything that day, right?:D

Percy: haha yes nothing happens... At the party

Loki: why are you so specific?🤨

Now I'm wondering how they are going to be? He's a crazy bitch, and we know he doesn't care about her opinion, so I'm picturing him fighting her and kissing her until she really wants something

But also, right now he's in the friendzone™ (a Chad somewhere had a chill), he's her best friend (kinda)

He could enter to her changing her clothes and just found that she's pissed about him no knocking (like her asking if he saw her piss? Girl, your priorities are kinda a mess, kick him out and then ask) he needs to fight for her to see him something different

(Thor is laughing internally cause it is karma)

The fight scene was so funny, Percy really said: you look like shit, let me treat you like one

Loki's crush on her cause she is just as chaotic as him, her just has the world around her finger and isn't afraid of using it

I heard him fall when she was "I know how to count :D" he was loving her gremlin era

I love all the yandere but Loki is dear to me (never as dear as Poseidon but close) cause he's so funny and just makes Percy to be herself again and loving it

Queen, loving your work as always thanks so much for the update and remember we love Nico :D

YEAH HADES WAS DOING ALL THAT HE COULD TO HOLD HIMSELF BACK CUZ HE KNEW THE SECOND HIS DICK GOES IN HER, HE'S GONNA LOSE IT 🥵

also.... i can see how much you like loki from this ask..... unfortunately, there's something you need to be warned about: loki is not what he seems so be careful 😔😔😔

[number1jazzsimp]

You hoes honestly have to stop babying Mammon , yes his sin is greed but you wanna know what he also is? A fucking Demon, yes sometimes the other brothers go a little too far with the insults and the fighting and the name calling but that’s literally what almost every pair of siblings do and for the record he does fuck up a lot of shit for people, for example he almost got us killed when he took Beel’s food and forced us to eat it, which quite literally DESTROYED OUR ROOM. Please stop acting like he’s innocent 99% of the time, it’s fucking annoying. 😭💀

How dare you say we should piss on the poor!! No but like, did you read this bit : "Now I'm not dismissing that, or saying he doesn't deserve any consequences" Did you? Because it feels like you didn't.

I honestly wasn't even going to answer this at first, but I feel like I should get my stance on the matter out there in a way people can understand, even if nobody reads it, so thanks for the opportunity to do that.

First, I want to say that I have siblings. I know what playful insulta and fights look like and feel like. I also know what the genuinely hurtful shit is, stuff said with the intention of making you cry if you upset whoever says it too much.

And yeah, they definitely do that to him. It is definitely not all fun and games especially considering that they have canonically made him cry and his very concerning response to the MC comforting him.

I agree with you that hes not always innocent, in fact, he is guilty half the time, but one hundred percent of the time when he is involved in something bad his brothers are absolutely terrible about it.

And about the thing with Beel, I went back and replayed the story segment you were talking about and, yeah it is partially Mammon's fault. In fact, I would even go as far as to say mostly at fault because he was fucking with Beel's sin BUT his brothers fuck with his sin all the time with little to no consequence and earlier that day (at least, I'm assuming that's the timeframe) Beel stole Mammon's food and showed zero remorse.

Now, Mammon is expected to control his sin. If he doesn't, he gets punished. Makes sense, right? Except the punishments are far too harsh and none of his brothers are held to the same standard as him, despite being much more impulsive regarding acts of violence when they're set off.

As far as I remember (though I may be wrong) Mammon is the only brother who didn't try to literally kill MC. And nearly every other brother tried to kill MC because of lack of control over their sins.

I'm not upset over the fact that he gets punished for doing stupid or dangerous or bad things, I'm upset the punishments are so drastic and that he seems to be the only one receiving them. If anybody read this far, thanks for listening!

[hacash]

I know you’re a huge Nate supporter and love to talk about all the microagressions against him, and one I noticed when rewatching is that in 2x3, when ted tells Jamie he’s starting on the reserve, he’s immediately playful with Will (“Mr. Kitman! Hit me!”) and it got me thinking how badly Nate must have felt seeing the ringleader of his bullies come back and immediately be nice to his replacement. Sort of like, “oh so you were capable of being a decent human being to the kitman this whole time but you just chose not to”

I think there’s such nuance in the way the the team getting nicer grates on Nate, who put up with their bullshit for years, especially since no one ever offers him a real apology. I think he’s definitely crossed lines, but when you look at it from his perspective, it’s easy to see how he got there. Anyway I just appreciate your nuanced takes on Nate and I can’t wait to see nick mohammed pull off another stellar performance in season 3!

Absolutely!

To be fair, I think Nate's aggression from Will stems a lot from power going to his head and being a perfectionist in his work; I'm a big fan of Nate but my God, the man is flawed. However I also think Will is a walking, talking reminder of how the team used to treat Nate, simply by dint of how they don't treat Will. He comes to Richmond and immediately gets handfuls of cash from them at Christmas, he's included in their little bonding rituals, he's part of the gang...whereas we all know the treatment Nate got whenever he tried to help the team.

(And that only finished after a particularly brutal show of strength from Roy. Which, uh, certainly gives Nate an interesting impression of what tactics do and don't work with the footballers.)

So yeah, from Nate's incredibly damaged perspective, having poor Will around must be unbelievably frustrating. He's pissed, and though he handles it badly, it's obvious why he's pissed. It's the moment when Eleanor in The Good Place, seeing her emotionally abusive mum parenting a new daughter, tearfully says that if her mum was capable of parenting the little girl then she was capable of parenting Eleanor but just chose not too. It's the moment in How I Met Your Mother when Barney screams at his absent dad 'well, if you were going to be some lame suburban dad, why couldn't you be one for me?!' - because clearly the team were capable, they were willing to be nice, they just didn't want to be nice to Nate, it must be about him, how they see him, he needs to change to earn their respect, he needs to perform those shows of strength....

...Of course, an outside perspective would tell you that the team's change of attitude from Nate to Will has absolutely nothing to do with Nate, and everything to do with how Ted's philosophy has impacted the team. (If Will had joined Richmond at the beginning of S1 I've no doubt that pre-reformation Isaac, Colin and Jamie would have eaten the poor boy alive, and the rest of the team would have been egging them on or wouldn't have dared stop it.) But Nate's not in the right place to see that. And considering all the history between him and the team, I don't think he should have to just 'man up' and accept that; he deserves that acknowledgement and those apologies. Which I am very much hoping we get this season.

[plagueybirb]

Because I love causing misery to characters, I'd like to offer two scenarios.

Scenario Number One! Master Kohga is the mask. All he needs is a new host every now and then and bam, he's back in business like he never stopped. BUT. No one knows.

At first.

For whatever reason, Yiga Clan has assembled. Maybe it's just after Astor's betrayal, or during when they've allied with Hyrule, or maybe it's after and there's a new threat that's not Calamity Ganon. Point is, Master Kohga is there and fighting or whatever it is he's doing. Sooga might be there too if you want.

Anyway, the worst thing happens. Master Kohga gets hit, mask goes flying, and he just. Doesn't get up again. He sorta just slumps, like a marionette with its strings cut. Crumples like a wet tissue. Goes down like a ton of bricks.

No one really registers it at first, but when they do, OH BOY.

Someone's picked up the mask in all the confusion and horror, perhaps Sooga, perhaps not. If Sooga does pick it up, maybe he passes it to the nearest unlucky fellow to check on the body. If he doesn't? Whoops. :)

Anyway, any poor unlucky fellow (or perhaps lucky, depending on how you see it) who holds it gets the weird urge to wear it. Nothing concrete, just the general feeling that Master Kohga would be REALLY happy if they put it on. You know. In his honor. :)

The transformation could be instant, just the flip of a switch. The original body evaporates (or melts if you really want body horror) and the new host just changes in an instant. And Master Kohga is back, no worse for wear, just a little pissed about getting launched into the dirt at Mach speed. OR. The change isn't instant at all. It's slow, painful, and takes minutes. The new host's bones break and rearrange, flesh twists and melts and resettles, fabric morphs to accommodate the form Master Kohga prefers to take. The one we all know.

And being a mask, he might not even remember anything when he doesn't have a physical host. He doesn't remember anything from getting catapulted from one host to another, and the hosts are already gone from the moment they put on the mask. It's only Master Kohga in there.

Also yeah, pretty terrifying to see out in broad daylight and not in the confines of probably some super secret ceremony that happens probably once a century.

And of course, extra terrifying if sayyyy, Master Kohga were to notice that a certain best lackey of his was. You know. Mysteriously missing :)

ANYWAY! Scenario Number Two!

The Twilight Realm starts to poke through the realities again. Who know where it begins, but wherever it begins, people go missing.

And oh no! What's this? A strange, shadowy beast with a mask for a face and curly shadow tendrils is terrorizing the desert during twilight hours! It's big, it's fast, dare I say, even acrobatic!

No one can really catch it, it's got this strange ability to simply teleport away, as well as teleport things to it to launch at whatever provoked its anger.

Mysteriously, it doesn't seem hostile unless provoked or in the presence of a certain couple of blondes or other monsters. In fact, it mostly just naps in dark places during the day. Perhaps it has a couple much smaller buddies with it, (or even maybe one that's nearly double its size and built like a brick wall) and as everyone knows, it only takes one to revive all the fallen shadow beasts.

The Yiga Clan is strangely safe from it. It and it's buddies even seem to like the Yiga Clan.

But hmmmmmmm. There seem to be members of the Yiga Clan missing.

No one's seen Kohga or Sooga in a while. How mysterious! :)