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read-write-thrive · 3 months ago

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Hospitals had never been the favorite location of either of the Dead Boy Detectives, and they usually refrained from even approaching the premises when at all possible. In the early days of the agency, it was too risky— too many dying or newly dead individuals meant Death was nearly impossible to escape, after all. Even now, with an expanded agency under the influence of the Night Nurse, and as such without immediate risk of hell if they strayed too close to Death, they still tried to avoid hospitals out of habit and for the comfort of all involved—the boys never knew when someone might see them (and it never stopped stinging when someone suddenly did) and it wasn’t exactly easy for the girls to just walk into a hospital without rousing suspicion. It was easier in some ways, these years later, now that the girls were adults and less likely to be seen as truants, but that newfound freedom did not bring with it any sudden desire to see what they were missing behind hospital doors.

All this caution and hesitation was ignored when Charles tapped on the mirror to check on his parents and was met with an unexpected chaos. A heart attack, from what the paramedics were saying as they wheeled the old man out on a stretcher, Charles’s mother and their neighbor following behind in her car. Charles didn’t witness the incident itself, pure luck on the timing, but the aftermath was a flurry of commotion that left him reeling.

He wandered back to the main space of their headquarters (a bigger place than what it once was, courtesy of the girls’ tiring of the boys being unreachable during a crisis or two and deciding to go all in on a shared flat) in a daze. Charles didn’t hide his checking in on his parents anymore, but still preferred to do it alone. Thankfully, his friends were kind, wonderful people who were happy to leave him to it. Said wonderful friends, however, were also quick to notice something wrong.

“Charles?” Edwin, naturally, was the first to notice Charles’s return and immediately put his book aside.

The girls, engrossed in a new show on the other side of their living room, snapped up in their own ways.

“What’s wrong?”

“What happened?”

Charles swallowed down the mixture of emotions threatening to drown him, “It’s my dad, he’s had a heart attack.” He screwed his face up in an attempt to stop the tears that threatened to spill out. Why was he crying? The bastard made his life miserable—

“Good.” Crystal was the first to comment. Niko slapped at her arm. Crystal put her hands up, “What? He was awful!”

“It’s still his dad!” Niko protested, “You can’t just say that!”

Charles tuned out their bickering. Everything felt a little tuned out, actually. And then Edwin was in front of him, hands on his shoulders.

“-love? Charles?”

“Hmm?” Charles tried to silence his whirring emotions.

“Are you alright?”

The Charles of even several years ago would have been quick to brush it all off with a smile. But he’d grown since then.

“Honestly? Not sure. Is that bad? Crystal’s right, he was a dick.”

“And Niko makes a very good point as well. He’s still your father.”

The tears were back again. Edwin pulled him in for a hug before Charles could say another word.

The girls had also quieted, alternating between watching the exchange and speaking through meaningful glances.

Niko was the one to break it, “Did you want to see him?”

The very idea shocked Charles, going rigid in Edwin’s arms.

“He might not even be dying, and going to a hospital is recipe for trouble—“ Charles responded slowly, as if waiting for someone to agree with him and take the weight of the decision off of him.

“I mean, a heart attack is probably close enough to death even if it doesn’t get him.” Crystal contributed.

“And our avoidance of hospitals doesn’t matter if you’d like to go see him. The Night Nurse’s lone positive trait is her protection from Death’s clutches, after all.” Edwin said into Charles’s curls.

“I-“ Charles gave himself a breath, “I wouldn’t even know what to say.”

“We don’t have to.” Crystal said softly.

“Yeah, we can just have our movie night and distract you, or if you want to talk to us but not go see him…” Niko backed her girlfriend up, trailing off into the silence.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Edwin echoed, sighing, “But I don’t want you to regret anything, either.”

“That’s true, it might be good for closure…” Niko chimes in once again, positive in the face of it all and determined to see Charles cheered up as well.

“Fuck that. You don’t owe him closure. If you don’t want to go, then don’t go.” Crystal’s anger was not what it once was, but she had her moments, particularly when abusers were the topic of discussion. Thankfully she seemed determined to keep her composure.

“Your call, Charles.” Edwin said, pulling away from the embrace but not letting Charles go just yet. He obviously had more to say, if the turn of his mouth was any indication, but he was all softness regardless.

“Could be my last chance, innit?” Charles said lowly, obviously not thrilled at the prospect, “If the bastard goes…”

Edwin’s face shifted, and Charles knew he’d guessed Edwin’s unspoken comment correctly. Still, Edwin’s tone and posture were the same, “No one expects it of you. And we’ll support you regardless of what you decide.”

Charles had a distant feeling of pride that Edwin had gotten better at this sort of thing. He’d tell him that another time. Once this was all over and the world made sense again.

After a moment of reflection, Charles sighed, “I think I’d like to go. Might help me heal or closure or whatever, yeah?”

The girls were up, pulling on their coats and shoes without a second thought. Charles felt monumentally lucky to have them.

Including the boy who held him still, voice low and meeting his eyes, “Do you want all of us with you? We can stay behind if you’d rather do this alone.”

Charles shook his head with his same sad smile, “I don’t want to think what might happen if I do all this alone, mate. Though you’ll have to forgive me if I lose my cool.”

Edwin clearly saw through the attempt at a joking diversion but smiled regardless, “Very well. Do you know which hospital we’re visiting?”

“I’m not sure, but it’s probably closest to their place, yeah?” Charles guessed, scrambling his thoughts trying to remember which hospital he’d been taken to when he’d broken his arm as a kid. It was so long ago, and so much had happened since…

Edwin once again shook him out of his thoughts, “Some investigation is in order, then. Niko? Crystal?”

“On it!” Niko chirped, already deep into her phone, Crystal close behind.

After some internet sleuthing, the girls had acquired the address of the nearest hospital to the Rowland family home and were taking the long way there while the boys readied themselves in front of the mirror.

“Are you ready?” Edwin double checked, hand outstretched.

Charles shook himself, “Not sure I’d ever be, love, but let’s get on with it.”

Edwin pulled him in for a quick kiss on the cheek, a sincere smile, and then through the mirror they went.

—-

They stepped out of a mirror in one of the many bathrooms in the hospital complex, disoriented by the amount of beings (alive and dead alike) as they tried to navigate the halls. The A&E department was the worst, with traumatic deaths creating a perpetual plethora of ghosts. Of course, this was also the first place they needed to check.

The boys held hands tightly as they went, both wound tight by the noise and the blood and the general atmosphere of the place. It was far from the most dangerous place they’d been in their decades together, but that brought little comfort in the face of it all.

Phasing through the various doors and curtains, it was ultimately clear that if Charles’s father was in this hospital, he’d been moved elsewhere. They split momentarily, with Edwin going to find a map of the hospital while Charles waited at the nurse’s station to see if he could get any leads on his family.

It soon became clear that there was simply too much going on for Charles to glean any real information, and he was ready to give up and find Edwin when the next phone call to the desk came from a familiar phone number and gave way to a familiar voice. Niko’s voice was clear on the other end, and just loud enough for Charles to overhear. The nurse gave the information with little questioning, informing all involved that Mr. Rowland had just been moved to a private room on a different floor. Charles didn’t stick around to listen to what exact department the man was in, or what the prognosis was—as soon as he knew the number he was off to find Edwin.

It was quieter in this department. Less urgent. Which meant something significant that Charles was pointedly not thinking about, less that send him into another tailspin. Thankfully Edwin’s presence was grounding beside him.

A nurse left the room as they found it, giving a glimpse through the doorway. Charles’s mother sat at his father’s bedside, accompanying neighbor at her side. They couldn’t see his father (or his father’s ghost for that matter) from their vantage point.

Edwin gave one last squeeze of Charles’s hand to get his attention, “I can give you a moment alone if you’d like.”

“Don’t you dare.” Charles tried to joke, but his voice didn’t seem to cooperate. Edwin’s eyes saddened, but he gave a firm nod and gestured for Charles to take the lead.

The man of the hour looked frail against the white sheets. He was awake, but by the look of his eyes he was definitely on his way out. There was a bulky mask over his nose and mouth, IV in his arm, heart monitor dragging along beside him. Charles's mother sat quietly, holding his hand between two frail ones of her own.

Charles didn't think his emotions could get any more complicated, and then his father's eyes found him. Then Edwin. Then back to him. He rasped behind the mask, Charles's mother shushing him gently.

"Hi dad." Charles sighed more than said, standing awkwardly at the foot of his bed and gripping Edwin's hand so hard he wouldn't be surprised if he managed to hurt him despite all the ghost technicalities.

Another rasp, this time accompanied by a frail hand gesturing towards the boys. Charles nearly slumped in relief when his mother glanced their way but returned to murmuring to her husband rather than reel back in shock. She had some time left, at least. His father, however, continued to try to speak.

Seeing his mother's distress, Charles felt himself snap into his protective mindset without thought, snarking, "Just give it up, mate. They can't see us—you're the only one dying here, so only you get the honour. Trust me, I'd rather talk to mum than you any day, but I cant say I'm too torn up about you going first. Maybe she'll get to have some happy years without you."

The man thankfully stopped his rasping, but his eyes emoted enough that Charles knew he heard him. It gave him the confidence to keep going, never quite sure what his next word was going to be but glad to say it anyway.

"Not that you asked, but I've been having a great time these last thirty, forty years. Yeah my death was awful, don't get me wrong. Kinda wish you got even a taste of that, for all the shit you put me through… Actually, do heart attacks hurt?" He turned his question towards Edwin, who had such a complicated expression that Charles immediately decided that the question wasn't that important, "Doesn't matter now, I guess. But yeah, my afterlife has honestly been better than my life ever was. Not only do I not have to deal with your bullshit, but I've also found people who actually care about me.

"Like this, right here, is Edwin," Charles swung their held hands upwards in an attempt at a wave, earning a slightly hysterical chuckle from Edwin, "He found me dying in that attic, showed me kindness as I died, and I've been by his side ever since. He's the best thing that ever happened to me—"

Charles took a breath as his voice cracked, Edwin's hand squeezing his in silent support. Charles didn't look over to try and keep it together a bit longer.

"He's the love of my—well, love of my afterlife. And I know you’d hate that, or at least hated all that when I was alive. I remember your rants about how all those people dying deserved it. Shouting at the telly like they personally offended you just by existing. Do you still think like that, all these years later? Hell, now here you are, dying on a hospital bed while your queer son laughs at you. What a twist!" Charles laughs, but it doesn't sound right even to himself. He, once again, pointedly doesn't look at Edwin. Looking at Edwin means dropping the brave face, and he's got a few more things to say first.

“You know, you’ll think this is weak or whatever, but I checked in on you and mum over the years. Neither of you could see me, and I never stuck around long, but I wanted—no, I needed to see. If I was the only one you beat, if you’d turn to mum now that I was gone. If you felt any remorse when I died. I’m not sure what I would’ve done if I’d seen you raise your hand to her. Probably taken up Edwin here’s offer to haunt the shit out of you.”

“I never—“

“Not in those words, love, I know, I know. But you meant it like that and you know it. Anyway, thankfully I never saw it. And she didn’t cower like I did, or hide any bruises, so I figured you were safe there. As for remorse, well, never really saw that either. I was bitter and angry those first few years over that. Thankfully Edwin here kept me busy. And now I can’t really be arsed, especially now that you’re dying and I can’t find much remorse either. Angry it took you so long, maybe.”

Charles once again looked at his mother, at the tears on her cheeks and her face turned in silent prayer.

“Even if you never beat her, I still wish you’d given her more time without you. Did you ever visit her family? You shot it down every time she even hinted at it when I was alive. And she’d smile and move on like it didn’t hurt her to hear that the man she married hated her family that much. You know, I used to promise her that I would take her to see them again. I’d tell her that once I was grown up we’d run away and live in India where you wouldn’t care enough to chase after us. She’d swat me for that. Disrespecting you. It always came back to you. Which is just how you wanted it, right? The whole world revolving around you? So fucking glad I got out of there. I shouldn’t have had to die for that, but whatever. It let me live free of you. And soon enough I won’t have to worry about you at all.”

Shoes squeaked obnoxiously right outside the door. Charles glanced up just in time to see Niko giving him a thumbs up as Crystal pulled her away from the glass. Turning back, he was glad to see his mother hadn’t turned away from her husband. No need to confuse her or get the girls in trouble.

Charles sighed and turned back to his father, “Not really sure what else to say here. Edwin? Any ideas?”

Edwin thankfully took the playful question as seriously as Charles meant it, “Hmm. You could tell him about hell if you’d like to be especially vindictive. Or take the moral high ground and forgive him for all he did to you. Crystal and I would also be happy to curse him for all he did if you’d like. Literally or figuratively.”

Charles genuinely laughed at how his father’s eyes widened, “While that sounds tempting, he’s already on his way out. All we’d do is freak out my mum.”

Edwin gave him a soft smile, “Of course. Just a suggestion.”

He returned the smile and squeezed his hand in thanks before turning back to his father, “Right. Well dad, I’m glad I caught you before Death did. I won’t speak to hell or anything, don’t want to jinx it, but I hope you get what you deserve. I’m not going to stick around to find out. And I won’t forgive you, either. You were a right bastard and I still struggle with getting you out of my head even after literally dying. So you don’t deserve my forgiveness, honestly. I’ll keep an eye on mum, but that’s for her and my sake, not for yours. Probably won’t go to your funeral or any of that, either. I’ll be a little mad if they bury you next to me, but those are just bones by now so I guess it doesn’t really matter. Yeah. I think that’s it. No forgiveness, no love, just hope you get what you deserve and that I never have to see you again. That about sums it up.”

Edwin squeezed his hand again, drawing his attention, and speaking softly, “Does that mean you’d like to go? We can wait if you want to be sure.”

Charles once again felt overwhelmed with it all, particularly with how lucky he was to have Edwin. He didn’t want to start crying here, so he just nodded and pulled Edwin with him out of the room.

“How’d it go?” Crystal asked from her seat in the hall chair, Niko nodding next to her.

“He’s dying alright. Gave him a piece of my mind. But I’m ready to never think about him again, honestly.” Charles tried to make light of it, but it was clear none of them bought it. He blinked up towards the ceiling to keep the tears away just a bit longer.

“Once we get back to the apartment, expect plenty of hugs from us.” Niko informed him, eyes glancing down the hall at the others down the way.

Charles smiled, “Noted. Sorry to make you come all the way out here, guys.”

“Nope, none of that—“ Crystal started, but was cut off by nurses suddenly rushing towards the room, obvious some alarm or something had been pulled. The girls stood in a rush to get out of the way.

“We’ll see you back at the apartment!” Niko called back to the boys as they took their leave.

Edwin held his arm out, the way he did when he wanted Charles to feel especially cherished, “Shall we?”

Charles turned very purposefully away from the door and took the offered arm with a thankful smile. He would need to have a proper cry and rant and rave about all of this later, he was sure. He’d come to learn that all those complicated emotions don’t just go away when you ignore them. But, for now, he was happy to hold onto his partner and get the bloody hell out of this hospital.

EDIT: now with part 2 !!

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dyne-osaur · 6 months ago

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might be rambling this might mean nothing but omg has anyone thought about how a huge thing™ in dead boy detectives is how women were wronged ?? (and also not just women who were wronged but boys who were shitty assholes but in this essay i am focusing on how women were wronged) am i looking too much into it.. (this is prob not intentional and i am overthinking as per usual but like)

spoilers duh

also this got really long i apologize

so in episode 1 we meet crystal who is basically like the catalyst for everything happening right and this is kinda obvious but like the whole kinda happens because her toxic demon ex bf stole her memories (fuck you david) and like? that was a horrible thing to happen to her and he sucks boo >:( and also throughout the whole show she has to deal with his shittiness and whatnot

and also in episode 1 we obviously see becky aspen who is like a child (specifically a little girl) who was kidnapped by esther (who also only goes after girls like hello?) and about to be fed to her giant snake which like ?? hey now,,, and they have to go in and save her and i feel like it's kinda important esp with the last episode ("she killed hundreds of little girls to stay young; who gets justice for them?" or smth) like it's built on the backbone of women who were wronged

in episode 2 with the dandelion sprites we have niko who lost her dad and her mom wants her to just be better and the sprites literally like infected(?) her while she was trying to feel better or smth (prob a bit of a stretch ngl) so we don't rly see much of this in episode 2

in episode 3 the most obvious thing of all is that the devlin guy murdered his entire family (his wife and two daughters) because he was a bitch and hated that they wanted to leave him which like ?? okay fragile male ego (as crystal so eloquently puts it) like these girls felt haunted by him in life and even in death they were stuck in a loop getting killed by him over and over and over because of his fear they would leave them. he was controlling and abusive and a creep and in the end he killed them. (obviously this episode has other important themes like how charles' trauma is reflected in this and his emotional response to devlin and the horror of controlling/abusive family members but i feel like there's smth to be said with how women keep getting wronged in this show idk)

in episode 4 we get crystal who is still dealing with the effects of her lost memories and her desperation to find her mom (we all know how that turned out) and importantly we get the stuff in the gift shop (specifically lillith and ig the washer woman)

the washer woman is washing away the blood of humanity yadda yadda (she's a rly interesting character i love her) and like when she and crystal are left alone crystal is desperately trying to find how she can have her lost memories and past back and the washer woman gives her that riddle to help her smth smth (basically crystal's memories)

lillith is more introduced here as the goddess of wronged women (and blood magic) (this is self-explanatory i hope)

in episode 5 (this one i feel is also obvious) we get those charming-but-actually-really-shitty jocks who died because maren (brad's gf) murdered them because they were being really horrible. we get shelby who killed herself because they drugged her and ruined her entire life and her future and everything and even in death the boys (though i love them, this was a fault of theirs) were skeptical because the jocks were just so charming

and then we get maren who invites crystal over because of her fear that she would get caught when she was trying to protect herself and she made a(n albeit huge) mistake. brad sent her nudes to his bff richie and they never thought they were in the wrong like hello? i was like wtf but anyways they practically ruined the lives of these girls (maybe not maren because they never fully got out but they could've and either way she ended up turning herself in from her guilt and stuff)

(also note: crystal says "we all lost our lives to boys who went too far" and like.. a big thing™ from my perspective is also how men/boys go too far e.g. the schoolboys (edwin and charlies) and david (crystal) and also the jocks and devlin and later esther's husband and arguably the cat king (don't come at me i actually love him towards the end but for more info check out this post i love their take on him) etc. there's probably more i just can't think of them atm)

in this episode we also meet maxine for like a second(?) time (first being devlin murders in ep 3) where she obviously wronged jenny by stalking her and she doesn't see what's wrong with what she did when she literally tried to murder her, she stalked her, she's apparently done this MULTIPLE times (smth ab this happening "again" which ? oml) and jenny feels horrible about this because she put herself out there for once and she got hurt. and at the end of this episode we see them all hang out and of course david comes back because crystal can't catch a break but back to the topic jenny was almost killed by maxine who did a horrible thing to her

episode 6 we finally hear tragic mick's story. sedna was literally a girl who got sacrificed by her dad because he thought it would help. she was a woman wronged out of the many women wronged on this show and she became a goddess for her trauma yay?? but at the core of that backstory was sedna who was a woman wronged by her father. (and ofc tragic mick and how he became human POOR GUY)

we also have crystal who finally has a way to get david out of her head (did anyone notice it doesn't break till she says "i just wish i could be normal" or smth which is prob kinda why she lost her powers?) all of this has been culminating since the beginning and then later he comes back and he's taunting her and yelling at her for giving up "the one thing that made you special" (come on man :|) she does get her powers back later though yippie (and sees her badass ancestors)

and jenny who is still dealing with the trauma is obviously upset throughout the episode because yk maxine was crazy

episode 7 we have the boys in hell but to keep in theme we have crystal who feels horrible that charles won't let her help and she just goes out to get david to open a gate and jenny follows. jenny then gets violated as david literally possesses her and we get kinda the climax and then the resolution of david and crystal as she realizes her power and takes her memories back and buries him because he was a horrible horrible person to her (and also the comments he made were so creepy like "i want to get back inside you" "let me back in" WHAT THE HELL no way that wasn't intentionally creepy)

and then jenny (poor jenny) has to deal with the fact that she has now been possessed and has to deal with all this creepy shit like can homegirl catch a break goddamn (and speaking of jenny we see maxine on the stairs still clueless to what she did wrong MAXINE OPEN YOUR EYES)

crystal eats her memories

episode 8 she finds out she was a horrible person and her past was not as great as she thought it would be. she treated her friends and strangers badly and she wakes up and she feels horrid. and she thinks it will get better and she calls her mom and her parents did her dirty. they neglected her (didn't even REALIZE she was MISSING) and didn't do shit for her and she probably acted out for attention (in horrible ways i am in no way defending what she did btw but she can be a horrible person and changed as a person crystal they could never make me hate you) and she swallows the rest of her memories and finds out that she was not the person she wanted to be

in episode 8 we also find out esther's backstory. the big bad of it all and i think a huge point in the story is how at the core of it all was a woman who was wronged and turned horrible for it. her husband cheated on her and she killed him but then she couldn't get enough and just wow. just to me the fact that at the core of the story is a woman who was horribly treated and as a result turned into a horrible person (and kind of parallel to crystal who was horribly treated (by her parents and by david) and she finds she can still turn things around and be good) and esther is too far gone as she yk decides to continue being evil

in episode 8, the end of it all, we see that turning point where crystal goes into esther's head and summons lillith. the goddess of wronged women. we see her as crystal yells that esther has been tormenting girls, WRONGING WOMEN, for decades (centuries?). we see the rage in lillith's face as she turns her stare on esther for skewing the gift that lillith gave to a woman scorned. we see lillith drag esther out of the house screaming and AGH i love that so much idk

but yeah those are my thoughts on the amount of women i just saw wronged and this could all mean nothing and i could be very insane and crazy but ! whatever !

#hello i'm back with a new obsession and it's dbda #dbda #dead boy detectives #dead boy detective agency #i love them sm #crystal palace #esther finch #lillith dbda #themes question mark #the crazed ramblings of a mad man #the mad man is me #this could mean nothing #LONG text post #this is one of my current obsessions btw #these women deserved better

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