#wild to remember i first played it in 2014. that's so long ago...

[serendertothesquad]

The Ultimate Serendipity-Odd Squad Lore Post

Because you people keep asking for my entire story.

No, no, not my life story. Christ sakes, we'd be here until Gen Z'ers died off if I had to reiterate my whole life story.

No, I'm talking about my entire Odd Squad story. You know, how I got here to begin with, how I rose to fame, and how I am objectively still a god without a religion, a cult, or a religious cult. That story. You all want to hear that story.

If you're an oldie, you've probably already heard my tale at least once. If you're new here to the funny kids STEM show fandom, then damn boy howdy are you in for a wild ride.

Get a snack and a drink, pop below the break, and let's begin.

Allow me to take you back to the year 2014. I was the ripe young age of 15, finishing up my sophomore year of high school, and suffering from undiagnosed depression of the "I'm trapped in my own home" variety. We didn't have cable, and so stuff like PBS Kids, NBC Kids, and 4Kids were the only things I watched on a regular basis. In the online space, I was largely chronline to the tenth degree (and note the "largely", because, y'know...school). The Internet, and spaces like Tumblr, served as escapism, and I spent a lot of time particularly in the Wild Kratts side of things.

I had first heard of Odd Squad through PBS's own upfront, the PBS Annual Meeting, that was held in May (though the show was, as I would find out much later, officially announced back in January at that year's TCA Winter Press Tour). It was the network's first live-action show since The Electric Company reboot in 2009 that got swiftly cancelled, which was already enough to get me interested because PBS hadn't taken a chance on live-action stuff since. The premise, as well, was charming and incredibly interesting -- a secret organization that solves problems using math sounded a little saccharine and thus perfect for PBS Kids, but since it was live-action, I figured it could bring a little spice to the network in a way that not other kids shows of the modern network era (read: 2013 onwards, past the network redesign) did. The fact that PBS was willing to go all-in on the show, up to teasers, previews, even having two new games available for fans to play before its premiere, was practically the cherry on top.

Fast-forward to around September. By this point, teasers and promos were already coming out for the show that showcased Olive, Otto, Oprah and Oscar in action. And by this point, I was absolutely invested. On a whim, I decided to take my Sony camera and record a reaction video of me watching it. Was it weird? Yes, but I had no money for a laptop that wasn't a decade old and didn't run about as well as a computer from the days of yore. You make do with what you have.

Needless to say, when the first episode "Zero Effect" premiered, I was having a whale of a time. That's...pretty much all I remember. Aside from the swearing. Lots and lots of swearing.

(...Look, it was 10 years ago. My brain can only go on a decline after being fully developed. And the depression has been eating away at me for that long. When astrophysicists perfect the art of the time machine, call me.)

I uploaded it to my YouTube channel the day after the show premiered. No editing, just a straight-cut video of my reactions laid on the table. I figured, "Okay, so this would be nice to look back on and laugh, maybe."

And then, a month later, I got a PM from Joshua Kilimnik, the actor who plays Season 1's big bad Odd Todd.

Before I get into that, though, a bit of backstory for my channel is necessary.

I had made my channel in 2011, when Wild Kratts premiered. At the time, it was mostly hosting Wild Kratts content, mainly Top 10 countdowns of fan videos I stumbled across on Tumblr or elsewhere as well as Sparta Remix-related stuff. (Yeah, remember that old meme? That isn't as dead as you think it is? Yeeeeeeah.) Around the middle of 2015, it unfortunately got struck down pretty hard when PBS began to go Nintendo on it, viewed fanworks as threats to their IPs, and decided to rip down my videos from the 'Net in three easy strikes -- and with it, my entire channel. It stung, to see my relatively hard work go down the drain. I'd be lying if I said I had wanted the channel to stay up just so I can look back on it in 5 years and cringe at how juvenile it was. Christ sakes, I even had MLP stuff up there at one point. Why? Don't ask me. I wasn't even watching the show at the time. I truly got into it when Season 5 began airing.

But back to the PM. You know, back when YouTube gave you the option to PM people.

Getting the PM from Joshua, I was, naturally, suspect. Celebrity impersonators are all too common, and as I would later come to find out, Odd Squad was not exempt. I had to laugh, because an autistic nobody like me getting a PM from a child actor who was in the industry long before Odd Squad was like Ariana Grande up and inviting me to have dinner with her because I made a few comments about her diction. It's a miracle, people. Miracles that only happen to those with life-threatening illnesses or those who have done good for the community. I had neither of those. Unless you count me going to high school as doing the community a service, in which case I have one of those things.

I read the PM again. And again. And again. And something in me thought, "Maybe...just maybe...this guy is actually legitimate. Maybe he's telling the truth about the entire Season 1 cast and the show's crew members, creators included, seeing my video. I mean it's 2014, what creator wouldn't look to the Internet for first reactions on their show?"

Fuck it. iBalled. I went for it. I reached out to Joshua.

And by God's oddness-laden utopia, am I so happy I did.

We immediately hit it off, taking our conversation from YouTube DMs to Twitter DMs (no, my current Twitter is not that ancient -- my time on birdsite-now-saltyman-hellhole is a whole different story) and discussing our hobbies and what we did. Joshua confided in me that he helped disabled kids, which, honestly, is a green flag in my book off the bat as someone who is, in fact, disabled. I told him about my animal shelter work and how I loved the show.

At the same time, I had posted on Tumblr about the show. Don't ask me what the post was about -- I honestly couldn't tell you, and combing through the tag is something I'd need a hell of a lot of motivation for -- but it somehow, by some astronomical means, took off. People came in like a small trickle. It was small, but over time, we built a strong community. I didn't exactly know how big my impact on people was until I read "how I got into Odd Squad" stories and saw my name pop up enough times to the point where I could safely say I was an inspiration to more than one person.

At some point in 2015, I had created a Wiki for the show. Fandom -- or Wikia, as it was called back then -- wasn't exactly new territory for me, as I had visited other show Wikis before. However, my Odd Squad Wiki didn't take off, and someone else ended up making another one that became far more successful.

...Yeah, you're surprised, aren't you? Figures. But not even I can lay claim to everything.

When the other Wiki took off, Joshua decided to dive right into the fire and engage with the fandom directly. Now, for any big-name fandom, this is everyday normalcy. The My Little Pony fandom has fans directly engage with cast and crew members who answer their questions, for example. But for small fandoms of niche IPs -- and oh believe you me, Odd Squad was incredibly niche back then -- a cast member interacting with fans was a huge deal. The hype only increased when Joshua was named an administrator, along with a few others, myself included.

Needless to say, Joshua being involved boosted the fandom's activity exponentially, and not just due to his spectacular acting on the show. Fanfics, fanart, fan videos...it was a bustling time of fan content. I can recall some of the most notable works just off the top of my head. The fandom got to be so busy that I made a news blog just to cover every bit of news, shifting away from my Wild Kratts news coverage to focus on a different show instead. I enlisted a few old friends to help me out, converted them to be oddballs (which, I will say, was a stroke of luck), and put them on the "staff team". My aim was to create something akin to Equestria Daily, but on a smaller scale. We did editorials, episode followups, and scoured the Internet for any and every bit of Odd Squad news we could find. It became a reliable source for many, especially considering PBS's horrible track record with even the most basic of news -- cancellations, renewals, and other such announcements. Not to brag, but I like to think I did a better job than them at actually giving news to fans who deserve it. (Hell, I still do. My hunger for even small crumbs of news is very strong indeed.)

I can easily recall when Season 2 was announced. Me and my friends were ecstatic. For me, I never thought Odd Squad would get a Season 2, and the Season 1 finale -- affectionately named OINFO (don't confuse it with "O is Not For Old", that's a different rodeo; this is "O is Not For Over") -- made sure of that. Originally, it was set to air in May, before it got shifted to June to coincide with Season 2's premiere.

And even long before that, the movie being announced blew our minds. I genuinely couldn't believe this niche little IP, birthed only several months ago, was getting a movie. And not even one of those specials that PBS markets as a movie as a ratings stunt. No, no, this was a full-blown theatrical movie. With A-listers to boot! And it was a damn good movie!

(...Okay, unrelated, but man, I'm reading through all my old posts and comments on the Wiki and cringing. God, did I really type like a 10-year-old back then when I was in high school? Egh gross cringe. The "let her say fuck" was strong with me back then.)

Of course, as most actors do, Joshua largely moved on from the show as the years went on. Most long-timer fans stuck around until the end of Season 2 before either other interests caught their eye or real life just got in the way too much. A majority of these fans dropped off the face of the Earth like an introvert who suddenly disappears mid-conversation, though they still popped into the Discord server a few times and I reconnected with one or two on Twitter. Hell, some of them even made a "hey, I'm back, and here's what's up" post on Fandom that made me ask if their accounts got hacked.

As a result, when Season 3 premiered, the fandom had slowed down to a crawl. Anyone who's bore witness to it, whether an episode or a nugget of criticism, can probably guess why. (And anyone who hasn't can feel the wrath of my "trust me bro" card, thank you.) It was like I willingly leapt off of the boat, it sped away without me, and I was trapped in the middle of fuck-all nowhere with sharks. So, you know, like Open Water if it was actually good. But the point stands in that I was pretty much all alone. I couldn't crawl to anyone for the sweet release of death after seeing just how hard S&P tried to avoid The Shadow's very obvious murder attempt by way of hacking into a car to make it fall into a lake of green goo. All I could do was scream and cry into a mic, edit, upload to YouTube, and let all the unsupervised kids looking for free episodes come to me in droves.

Oh, and post to Odd News. Until I accidentally deleted the account.

By that point in time, my old friends had all left due to real life commitments, and only one, Angelica, remained. But even she drifted away, and I was stuck running it all alone. So, I made the difficult decision to let it rot, and frankly...I haven't touched it since. Largely because I left Tumblr entirely and only just now came back. On the news front, I expanded my coverage to PBS Kids as a whole network, just as I do on Twitter.

It wasn't until the back half of Season 3 premiered that the fandom slowly but surely began to grow from planted roots, and I could connect with people again. Seeing people flood the Discord server and Tumblr, sharing art and news and theories, was amazing. Not for Season 3, though -- it was because of the past two seasons. Honestly, to say there's been more talk about Otis and Odd Todd than about any other character in the entire franchise is a hell of an understatement, because it dominated pretty much 98% of the fandom.

From there, new fanworks, fanart, and other pieces of fan-created media were created, and many still continue to be created to this day. Though hyperfixations can be yoted off the cliff and die in an instant (with deepest apologies to Shroom), it's great to see a burst of activity in such a small fandom. Hell, it even got big enough to where we had a Secret Valentine's exchange a couple months back, which was a real joy because it gave me a chance to flex my writing chops even if it did leave me on the verge of a third panic attack. And...the fandom being revived did land me a solid interview for a college assignment. Which, to me, is my own equivalent of getting a dedicated panel at a convention.

But this isn't a whole entire story about fandom lore. It's a story about me.

And honestly...I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little tired with Odd Squad myself.

Between the choking responsibilities of adult life (yay work), the state of my mental and physical health (yay depression and anxiety), and the franchise being fucked over sideways to Pluto and back by numerous entities (yay TV industry), I really can't just focus on Odd Squad anymore. Now, I'll give a fair warning to you and tell you to make no mistake -- my enjoyment of the franchise will die with me and my entire bloodline if the franchise itself doesn't die first. But I've found other special interests and hyperfixations that have grabbed me more than the funny kid agent franchise has. I derive more joy from binging the 90s Frasier series, Pretty Cure, and Neighborhood Wars than I do with the funny kid agent franchise.

Now, does this mean I'm leaving the fandom? God no. To do it on the verge of the franchise's 10th anniversary would be utter blasphemy. And I do plan on weaponizing this blog for more Seren's Studies, including episode reviews and character analyses I can't do with the limited resources I have. But the drive for Odd Squad is just...no longer there for me. I did not, unfortunately, get the "Odd Squad forever" autism. I got the "childhood is hell, but okay, sure, I'll make you a functioning competent adult to a certain degree" autism.

Maybe one of these days, amidst the countless new pieces of media that keep releasing, I'll be able to rewatch Odd Squad. It's worn out its welcome nostalgia-wise, but I find it to be a pretty enjoyable view when I take off those glasses and put on the "my God is an awesome God and that's why I try to attend church every Sunday" ones. I'm still making crossover fan projects to other IPs like MLP, Super Monkey Ball, and Precure. And of course, I'll be seated for Odd Squad UK to see if it's good or not -- I'm more than happy to take the bullet for people who don't want to see it for whatever reason, just as I did for the back half of Season 3. But for now, the drive is pretty much gone.

I will admit, I'm likely missing some stuff. My memory is absolutely terrible, and I had to go fishing for a lot of stuff to refresh it (one of the reasons why this took so long to release in the first place). But this is what I can dredge up.

I'm honestly proud of the little fandom I birthed. I could work a hundred jobs in my lifetime and still say that founding the Odd Squad fandom is by far my greatest accomplishment. I've met so many amazing people, seen so many amazing things, and really, I'm hoping to see more people in the years to come. If the aim is to introduce Odd Squad to new generations of kids, teens, young adults, and adults alike, then I'm all for it. Expose them to goodness. None of that Cocomelon shit.

Thank you for reading, and to all of the people in the fandom both old and new, thank you for touching my life in ways I never thought of. If you've got any further questions about my story, send 'em my way; I'll be glad to answer 'em.

See you all in the next Seren's Studies, whenever that may be.

[bexism]

Hi! This is going to come 100% out of nowhere and going to be super long and maybe a bit awkward but I just felt like I should tell you this lol. I feel like we never really get to know with the internet how we effect other people...so here we are.

So I can't remember how I first found your videos like 12 years ago on Youtube but I was absolutely obsessed. I think I watched pretty much anything you posted for Sherlock/Supernatural and followed you on Tumblr. I was going through a really tough time, and your videos/posts helped me! It was around then that you started to post about something called Roosterteeth. I didn't care too much, but noticed it. Then at some point in like 2013, I remember thinking 'I'm going to look into this thing. If the person I follow that also likes SPN/Sherlock/Your Beautiful/etc also likes this...maybe I'll like it.' Thats not something I do, like ever. But since I was so into your videos, I decided to give this thing I had no idea about a chance. I didn't play video games, didn't even know what Minecraft is, so I took such a big chance and started from the beginning. I went down that rabbit hole fast.

Flash forward next summer, I'm a Guardian at RTX in Austin for the first time. My first time ever travelling 100% alone, and to another country! I had the absolute best time. I continued to be a Guardian from 2014-2019, made amazing memories, tired things I never thought I was capable of and made lifetime friends. I also, to bring it all around, was drunk in Austin after RTX and wandered into Jensen Ackles lol. I would have thought it was a hallucination except others saw him too.

When I first started as a Guardian at RTX I was a VERY shy nerd lol, but RTX really helped pull me out of my shell, to the point that I became a manager of sorts there with entire teams working under me. This confidence stuck with me until now, where I am comfortable doing things I never would of been before. I'm comfortable in crowds, in parties, on stage, etc. I like video games now, which I didn't really before. It's completely changed my life. Not just that, but being a Guardian at RTX helped me pull through a severely traumatic few years of my life.

I don't know what would have happened without RTX. I don't know what would have happened if I didn't decide to follow you on tumblr like 12 years ago. I don't know what would have happened if I didnt take a random chance on your interests being similar to mine. But, my life would be very different.

Anyways, I'm done now. I don't know if you'll ever read this, and thats okay! I just saw you again on Tumblr and wanted to let you know that even though it was completely unintentional, and maybe a bit coincidental, you have changed some random girls life :) For that, I really hope you have an amazing life too!

holy crap i just woke up and i'm really emotional, thank you so so much for telling me this. i never knew making silly little vids on the internet could have such an impact, i'm so proud of you for getting out there, doing RTX and growing from it and i'm SO glad my videos led you to that journey. roosterteeth helped me a lot back in the day and to think i'm the reason someone else found them and they helped them too. thank you for taking the time out of your day to tell me this, you've made me feel incredibly special 🥹 ❤️ (also BUMPED INTO JENSEN ACKLES?? that's absolutely wild)

[alexsfictionaddiction]

Review: Last Seen Online by Lauren James

There is something about thrillers with an online element that I find really intriguing. With the internet being as wild as it is, it often feels like anything is possible here -even things you previously thought unbelievable. Add the insane energy that fandoms contain and it's the perfect mix for a twisty, shocking thriller.

Aspiring, young actress Delilah has a nightmare audition for her school play but it sees her paired up with Sawyer, whose mother starred in a very popular TV show decades before. A show that ended when one co-star apparently murdered the other. But Delilah has come across some mysterious blog posts from back then, written by an online persona called gottiewrites, who appears to know things about the actors' personal lives. Before long, Delilah is immersed in a world of conspiracy, obsession and the fact that the truth of what happened may still be hidden.

From the very first paragraph, we are clearly supposed to think of Delilah as relatable and 'just a normal girl'. She worries about the same minor imperfections that we do and so, it's obvious that she is us in the story. Having a character who serves as the reader's eyes in the story is a really great device but I'm not sure I should have been able to 'see' the workings of this in the writing. I probably would have liked Delilah just as much as I did without being immediately told that she worries about bad breath or her period showing.

I really liked how the story was told in various forms of media and that we were introduced to the scandal as it unfolded in the press. It meant that we were given evidence to come to our own conclusions as Delilah was piecing things together and that made for a really satisfying read. I also felt like I got to know the show, despite it never being an actual show. I don't know whether Lauren James has any experience with the makings of a TV show but it felt very well researched.

Of course, we also get gottiewrites' blog posts to read through. I really believed in gottiewrites as an obsessed online fan but sometimes some of the choice of words made me think 'hmm, was this how we spoke in 2014?'. As someone who was heavily involved in online communities in 2014 and before, some of the language that gottie and their commenters use felt far too contemporary. For example, I don't remember us talking about 'receipts' 10 years ago. It's a minor thing that I know some readers won't even notice but it did take me out of things temporarily.

The way the comments spiral was really well done and read really authentically. I could believe that these were copied and pasted from a real Tumblr post. I could almost hear all the different voices chiming in with their thoughts and I definitely forgot that James wrote all of these bits too. It's a real art to come up with all of these tiny character appearances, so I really commend them for that.

Delilah's characterisation as an obsessive friend also felt really authentic. She displays more than a few neurodiverse traits and I'd believe it if the author confirmed that she's undiagnosed but certainly autistic. Her intensity frightens her friend Nida and this is something that many autistic people come up against. I've not seen it displayed quite as explicitly as James does it here, so I really appreciated that.

Last Seen Online is definitely a page-turner. The nature of the format (the blog and comments make up quite a lot of words) slows down the pacing but the fact that I wanted to keep reading it means that it is worth diving into. I can see how some readers might find the plot convoluted but as I said at the start of this post, it's believeable if you know anything about the craziness of online fandoms. If you like YA stories that explore celebrity culture, scandals and fandom investigations, you'll love it.

[hmel78]

In conversation with Petter Carlsen ...

Earlier in the year, you may remember that we caught up with ‘Long Distance Calling’, and discovered that they had recently asked one of Norway’s finest vocalists to join them as lead singer on their new album, and tour of Europe.  When we went along to a show, we also discovered that Petter was the opening act each night - at which point, it seemed like a great chance to grab him for a chat! Born in Alta, not so many years ago, Petter Carlsen has spent much of his life creating beautifully personal and atmospheric music, reflecting the cold, dark and wild surroundings of northern Norway. His debut album  “You Go Bird” was released in 2009 and turned on many Norwegian ears. His second album “Clocks Don’t Count” was released to incredible reviews in 2011 in Europe, through UK indie label Function Records. Subsequently Petter really began to gain ground as an artist, and has picked up fans all over the world whilst touring as special guest with UK band Anathema, Danish artist Tim Christensen and throughout clubs and festivals in Europe, September 2014 saw the release of his third album “Sirens”; produced by Wetle Holte (Eivind Aarset, Anja Garbarek) and mixed by Christer A. Cederberg (Anathema). With all of these musical achievements, and long distance touring, it would seem that Petter has travelled far in life -and with much more travelling on the horizon, we were curious to know, how he got from there, to the here and now ...

HR - What first interested you in music? 

PC - I became very fascinated by a lot of music at an early age, but the band that made me want to learn how to play the guitar was Metallica.  The first time I heard ‘Fade to Black’ I was blown to Pluto and back (via Jupiter). Then I had to put together a two week intense promo campaign towards my mother to get her to invest in a guitar and amp. She did.

HR - Who taught you to play?

PC  - James Hetfield! haha. Some friends of mine had a head start, and I learned a few chords from them. But mostly I listened to music and tried to play the songs with the help from my ears and hands and some tabs. However I early started exploring how to write my own songs. That was the main aim all the way. My first band was called ‘Burger Heads’ and our inspirations was Metallica and Paradise Lost + other heavy bands.

HR - Is there a lively music scene in Alta?

PC - Yes, and It’s growing. There are a lot of youngsters that are eager up there, more now than before I think. There are more songwriters now and less cover bands. It’s a small town, but there is something going on. We have a very nice festival in the summer called Aronnesrocken which was founded on the idea of creating a scene for the up and coming. We also have a place called ‘Huset’ which translates ‘The House’ where there are lots of creative and hungry souls making music, and dance and other forms of art.

HR - Blackmoon Magazine is sold in ‘Puska’s Music’, and we have heard a lot about it - how much of your youth did you spend in the Alta store? And as an adult too?!!! ;)

PC -The legend’s original name is Gunnar Schwaiger, but everybody calls him Puskas. The store was quite big in the ninetees, and I was there very often - always exploring new bands , trying to find gold. I did. I remember quite a few times sitting down by the bar with headphones on and being blown away by Metallica, Paradise Lost,  TNT, Seigmen etc. I got a fulltime job there in ’99 and quit school (university). I don’t regret it. I enjoyed working there very much.

The store is still going strong despite that Puskas lost his beloved wife and partner for the last years.

May it last forever!

HR - Given the wealth of music you had the opportunity to listen to - Who have been your biggest influences?

PC - Anathema. I discovered the ‘Eternity’ album at Puskas too :) In recent years we have become friends and we have worked together for many occasions. They are very generous. It’s family.

HR - And what about Norwegian musical heroes?

PC - Åge Aleksandersen, Kari Bremnes, Kvelertak, Wetle Holte, Aleksander Kostopoulos, Motorpsycho, Seigmen, Jaga Jazzist and a lot of people I’ve been so fortunate to work with!

HR - Living so far north, in Alta, did you feel distant from the opportunities that may exist in the music industry?

PC - No , I didn’t. Ignorance is bliss haha. However I was quite young when I moved to Oslo, and I was 25 when I went ‘all in’as a musician.  I didn’t dare at first. So I worked as a sound engineer for a long time before I was ready to give it a shot with my own music.

I have to mention that I don’t think coming from the outskirts is any set back, quite the contrary. I’ve had a tremendous support from people in my hometown.

I have always been back and forth between Alta and Oslo. I have a lot of contacts both here and there.  I found my musical companions in Oslo , but I also have quite a few in Alta. Besides that, I am really happy to travel outside Norway and do gigs.

HR - What do you feel was your first real success?

PC - hmmm. Going to the next round in UKM with ‘Burger Heads’ in ’96. UKM is a cultural event for young artists.

HR - That’s pretty impressive! You have another project ‘Pil and Bue’ - how is that going?  How did the partnership with Aleksander happen?

PC - Pil & Bue is going very well. We are both very excited about it and at the moment we are doing festival shows in Norway. We have done two albums so far and are starting to work on the next this autumn.

The reason we met was because I needed a stand in drummer on a couple of shows for my solo project. At last his name came up and he was free and keen on doing the gigs. At a shabby hotel room in Amsterdam we talked about how we began playing music. It was quite similar for us, we started out with heavier and more aggressive music. His first band was called ‘Sinnsyk Ugle’ (Insane Owl) and was a hardcore band. We decided then and there that we should start a rock band. A few weeks after we returned to Norway he called me to let me know that he’d bought a new Gretsch drum kit, perfect for our plan. And as we felt that we didn’t need any more members, the band was up and running in no time. It felt good going back to the roots, and it still does. I’m happy that we met, cause the collaboration is very good.

HR - You’re about to tour Norway too - how does it make you feel to play to your home town?

PC - It’s always a little different than other shows. For a long time I didn’t enjoy those shows as much as others, but I think that’s over. Now I am more relaxed about it. I feel that I have a lot of fans and supportive people there, making it a pleasure.

HR - How did you meet up with ‘Long Distance Calling’? 

PC - Zoetemeer, the Netherlands, October 2010. I was supporting Anathema on their entire european tour, and LDC joined in for some shows in NL and in Germany. We hit it off straight away and have been friends ever since.

HR - on tour you are both vocalist for them, and opening act with your solo material - Do you enjoy the experience as a whole?

PC - Yes, I do! We have a very good time on the road - even though I don’t speak german haha. The initial plan was to bring Pil & Bue as a support act but illness in Aleksander’s family made that impossible. How fragile we are. It was a bit challenging to do the solo support when people were expecting a rock show, but all in all it went well. I learned a lot on tour I think.

HR - Do you feel like you have to be two different people - to be able to perform as a solo artist, and as part of a band on the same bill?

PC - Good question. It’s two very different set-ups but I’m the one who’s singing, and singing both my own stuff and LDC’s stuff comes natural to me. Takes a lot of focusing though, but I enjoy the challenge. So I guess the answer is no.

HR - Will you be involved with their future projects?

PC - I don’t know at the moment. We talked about writing together ... Let’s see what happens. Would like to give it a go. I know that we’ll be doing a new tour early next year for the ‘Trips’ album.

HR - And as a solo artist, and also Pil & Bue - what’s next?

PC - On the solo side I am making a new record. It’s gonna be a little different this time. The plan is to release it next spring.

Pil & Bue is the main ship as of now. We are two people and we have a certain responsibility for each other. The solo part is easier to initiate when it’s a little quiet in the P&B camp.

HR - Which of your compositions are you most proud of - solo or with a band?

PC - Impossible to say. I have to say I’m proud of them all. That’s a good feeling.

HR - And If you hadn’t become a musician, what would you have done?

PC - There was no other option!

[ms-hells-bells]

20 years later, someone wrote a poignant letter to another guyana paper, in regards to how poorly the girls were treated, with so little celebration and news in regards to their survival, and even worse, all the support they were promised after their rescue, like over $50,000 to the eldest when she turned 18, and helping her into nursing school, never materialised.

Dear Editor,

Really time does fly, I couldn’t believe that it’s almost 20 years since those two sisters were lost in our dense jungle. I’m sure that I speak for many when I say it was completely blotted out from my mind until Stabroek News’ Gaulbert Sutherland took us back in time: “Girl lost in jungle 19 years ago recalls ordeal” S.N. Oct 6th, 2014.

Reading the story about Bertina and Bernadette Domingo was definitely not a “Cinderella” kind fairy-tale stuff, and if there is anyone who reads it and thinks so I beg of you to share your views perhaps it may help me to see it from a different and positive perspective.

I can remember so well their humility and respect which they exhibited upon reaching some miners at a camp-site after such an ordeal even as young as they were then, the first set of words they uttered were “good afternoon”, such impassive response befitting philosophers. Few grown adults under such condition would have been able to maintain their composure.

But after reading what Gaulbert Sutherland reported, the permutations of thoughts that flooded my mind left me in quandary: Just why should I be worried, bemoaning over the affairs of others? This is the way of Society, these things will go on and on forever, just who do you think you are? Who is listening?

Who cares? Why keep writing words that no one hears? Then for a moment a thought – why allow yourself to become like them, what good does it bring?

And by the way I think these kind of stories should be compiled into a book, we have so many poignant, heart-rending human interest stories that would sure make wonderful readings – they need chronicling.

But definitely there are some worrying things that were mentioned: the promise made to the sisters by the then late President, $65,500 they were to uplift upon attaining the age of 18 years; Bertina said she lost all of her documents when she took ill – bank slip, medal awarded, plaque etc.

She had wanted to become a nurse, was she assisted in any way in realising her life’s ambition? She never got a chance to write exams, form two was the highest class then in that community – what now!?

Also mentioned was the difficulty getting items to those remote areas; that her 11-year-old daughter would soon be sent to Secondary school at Annai and would be boarding there, the money promised to her and sister would certainly be welcome. I will play the positive card here and assume that Bernadette the younger sister is doing well in Brazil, so let that be.

Editor, in light of all the above it behoves one to ask; just where was/are the representative of the community? Government officials, Toshaos and other personnel?

For a very long time I was under the impression that special attention was being paid to those two sisters, they were our young heroines. I remember two American pilots who were lost somewhere in the desert for two weeks, their plane was shot down/crashed and they were decorated and honoured as heroes. They made headlines all over magazines, tabloids etc. And they were grown men, soldiers with sturdy constitutions trained in survival skills as compared with our two young women-virtually babies – 9 and 13 years old and had to battle with a formidable and treacherous jungle infested with wild ferocious beasts and dangerous reptiles empty handed – except for a cutlass – starving and being stalked by a jaguar which they endured and survived for about six weeks! You know it’s so disheartening, one hears and reads so much about the big brouhaha being made, the rapid and radical positive changes being made in these remote far-reaching hinterland regions, yet now reading this story after twenty years, it seems such an illusion, sad indeed.

Bertina and Bernadette, though now 32 and 28 years old respectively, together have 11 children six and five; and while that is nothing unusual, upon reflection and examining the present I don’t think we would want to classify the outcome of events, since their ordeal as a form of achievement where we can be proud. With six children to take care of, Bertina does farming and fishing in the jungle surrounding her remote village Apoteri, while her eldest son who is 15 years old works in the gold field.

In the inner recesses of our minds our conscience speaks.

Yet I sensed that she does exhibit heroine qualities, for though she has not been able to become a nurse, she does possess the strength, resilience and determination nursing six children – a nurse in her own right, as mothers are in spite of broken promises, disappointments and lost medals. But she deserves more than a medal at this stage. I wish the sister the grace and fullness of life and I hope that somehow she would be able to see this letter.

in reading more about the colombian children that survived the plane crash and jungle, i stumbled upon this story. there is almost no english news about it, largely only an AP article from 1996 about it, there's not even a wikipedia page, but i found a translated page of a guyana newspaper with the story.

THE gripping, inspiring survival experience of two young girls lost in Guyana’s jungles is the stuff epic films are made of.

Bertina and Bernadette Domingo of the Wapishiana tribe, Apoteri Village in the Rupununi began travelling from 7th April 1995 with their uncle up the Essequibo River; an uncle who had been instructed by the father of the girls to take them direct to the family farm.

Instead he diverted in the opposite direction with them, paddling for ninety-five miles in a canoe, then forcing them to trek through the jungle, threatening to kill the terrified girls when they cried.

At Pakani Falls they watched in fear as their uncle died of malaria – an uncle whose motives for his actions are shrouded in secret, lost forever in the hinterland landscape that had been the undoing of men from a time even preceding the Spanish Conquistadors.

If that uncle meant harm to his innocent, trusting nieces, as his actions indicated he did, because terrible pictures come to mind of child and female trafficking, he paid a terrible price for his heinous betrayal of his brother and nieces.

But that was no real consolation to the two young girls, who were left alone and defenceless to fend for themselves in the dense, dark rainforest, with merely a cutlass, a hammock, and their traditional tribal skills to keep them alive.

They were forced to undertake a journey that would test all their survival skills, their resilience, their character, and their survival instincts if they were to live.

The older Bertina, at thirteen, would have to become the leader, transmitting her unshakeable faith that they would survive their ordeal to her frightened nine-yr-old sister. In turn, the response of the younger girl, and the faith she reposed in her older sibling, would bolster Bertina’s spirit and inspire and encourage her to greater feats of endurance.

Before their journey ended they would have traversed over 200 miles of virgin rainforest, at the mercy of the elements, with all the inherent dangers of the deep rainforests – from the remote reaches of Essequibo to approximately 190 miles up the Berbice River – a mile away from the Lindo tributary.

They ate what they could, but their knowledge of the land and basic survival skills, inculcated from birth by the traditions of their aboriginal tribe, came to their rescue, resulting in their finding the “haiwa” wood to produce the most crucial requirement for their protection at night – light.

The girls staved off hunger by eating berries, peppers and fish caught by the traditional method. They remembered their tribe’s ancient skill of lighting an area of water with the “haiwa” wood to entice fish to the surface, then spearing them with a spear – in their instance with a cutlass.

The girls also had a miraculous escape from the claws and jaws of a jaguar and were forced to keep their terror at bay when they encountered the large snakes, crocodiles, and other large and dangerous denizens that proliferate in Guyana’s rainforests.

At one point they thought that they were about to be rescued. Hearing the sound of an engine their hopes soared as they walked quickly toward the sound and what they hoped would have been the end of their ordeal.

But as fast as they walked it was not enough and the frightening sounds of the rainforest enclosed them once again.

Rescue seemed near at hand once more when they stumbled upon a porknocker’s camp, but the camp had long been abandoned and was empty of any human presence. At nights they slung their hammock high in the trees to protect themselves from the many ever-existent perils threatening their survival every minute, with every step they took, and even in their sleep.

Many nights Bertina stayed awake for hours watching protectively as the exhausted Bernadetta slept the sleep of the innocent.

Meanwhile the girls’ parents were frantically looking for them and search parties were organized. The parents, accompanied by members of one search party went as far as Kurupukari – 60 miles from the Potaro River, but had to give up, not knowing what direction to take in the vast, dense rainforest.

Frantic messages were sent to relatives living in Georgetown in attempts to locate the uncle and girls, but to no avail.

Finally, at 5.50 p.m. on the third day of May, 31 days after they had left home, covered with mosquito bites and weak with hunger, Bertina and Bernadetta stumbled into a porknocker’s camp.

The astonished miners fed the girls and then took them into the city, where officialdom took over, affording them medical and other care.

Their rescuer, a miner named Gonsalves, said that the area in which they were found was so remote that hardly anyone ventured there.

The indomitable will to survive, their stoic resilience in the face of betrayal and overwhelming dangers, and the epic journey of these two fragile little ones is the stuff of which legends are made.

This was triumph of the human spirit against all odds. These two little girls were imaginative, resourceful, determined, tenacious, and, above all, courageous beyond the parameters of normal human endurance of body and mind.

To honour their resilience and courage in the face of danger and adversity, the Domingo sisters were deservedly conferred with a special award for courage during the 1996 investiture ceremony by then Executive President of Guyana, Dr. Cheddi Jagan.

They had also been awarded with a plaque saluting their bravery by the South Ruimveldt Policing Group.

Bertina and Bernadetta Domingo represent the best of the indigenous peoples of this land.

[orcelito]

Oh a whim, I loaded up my psp... just to see. p3p was already in the thing, so I looked at my save files, and... 🥺

Never did finish the minako game but I got further than I thought, considering I'd been suffering by missing minato So bad. Stopped playing I think bc I got into smt iv apocalypse late 2016, then tales of xillia (1 and 2), then fire emblem echoes, THEN persona 5 came out & consumed my life for several months.

God, it's so retro. I vaguely remember starting a ng+ in 2018, but since it's been so long I think I'm just gonna start a whole new one. Experience the game from the start again :')

[cyndavilachase]

I’m Looking Forward Now 💖Thank you and good bye

So, it’s been a little over a week since Steven Universe Future ended… 

I’ve been hesitant to write this, honestly, but I’m tired of holding myself back from properly expressing myself in fear of appearing overly invested in the media I consume, even in private. Writing helps me organize my thoughts and feelings, and I feel like these thoughts in particular may resonate with many, so I want to share them. I want to talk about what Steven Universe has done for me personally, both as an artist, and as a person.

I’ve been around since the day the first episode of the original series aired. I actually remember when Steven Universe was just a logo on Wikipedia’s “List of Upcoming Cartoon Network Shows” list, back when I was a freshman in high school. It piqued my interest, but when commercials finally dropped for it, I thought it was going to be bad because of the way marketing handled introducing Steven as a likeable character. There was still something about it that made me want to give it a chance though, so I went online and watched the pilot before the first episode's release. I was hooked immediately. I knew I was going to love it, and I did. I fell so absolutely in love with Steven as a character, and the world that he and the gems lived in. I became obsessed. I was always so excited for new episodes to come out. Little did I know what else it would do for me as I went through my adolescence alongside it.

As the show progressed, it was evident that what I wanted out of a western animated childrens’ cartoon was finally coming into fruition: this show was becoming serialized. There was continuity, there was plot, there was character development-- it was getting deep. It was pushing the groundwork that Adventure Time laid out even further (thank you, Adventure Time).  

I will give credit where credit is due: earlier western childrens’ cartoons I grew up with like Hey Arnold, and Rugrats, among others, also touched on heavy topics, but Steven Universe was able to take similar ideas (and even more complex ones, concerning mental health and relationships) and expand on them outside of contained episodes and/or short arcs. These themes, which were a part of the show’s overarching story, spanned across its entirety. Continuity was rampant. 

What did this mean? It meant kids cartoons didn’t have to be silly and fun all the time and characters weren’t just actors playing a part in 11-minute skits. Steven and the gems would remember things that happened to them, and it affected them and how they would function and play a part in their story. This was a huge deal to me as a teenager. I always wanted the cartoons I grew up with featuring kid characters to feel more. In my own work, I often felt discouraged when combining a fun, cutesy western art style with themes as dark or layered as anime would cover. I always thought it had to be one or the other because an audience wouldn’t take a combination of the two seriously enough, based on discussions I had with classmates, friends, and online analysis I read at the time. Steven Universe proved to me otherwise. This show was opening the door for future cartoons exploring in-depth, adult concepts. I felt so seen as a kid, and was inspired to stick with what I love doing.

I was actually very worried about the show’s survival. It was in fact immensely underrated and the fandom was miniscule. Then in 2014, JailBreak dropped, and it’s popularity exploded. Part of it was because of the complex plot and the themes it was covering like I mentioned, but also because of its representation. 

I remember when fandom theorized that Garnet was a fusion due to grand, tragic reasons. Turns out, she’s simply a metaphor for a very loving w|w relationship. This was huge. I cannot stress how important it is that we continue to normalize healthy canon queer relationships in childens’ media, and Steven Universe finally was the first to do that proper. Introducing these themes offers the chance for a kid to sit there and ask themselves, “Why is this demonized by so many people?” I asked myself exactly that. Ruby and Sapphire were my cartoon LGBT rep. They were the first LGBT couple I ever ecstatically drew fanart of. I was dealing with a lot of internalized homophobia at the time, and they showed me that I was allowed to love women and feel normal about it. The process of overcoming this was a long one, but they played a part in my very first steps into becoming comfortable with my sexuality. I could go on and on about it’s representation in general-- how it breaks the mold when it comes to showcasing a diverse set of characters in design, in casting, and in breaking gender roles. It’s focus on love and empathy. Steven himself is a big boy, but he's the protagonist, and the show never once makes fun of his weight, or any other bigger characters for that matter. It wasn’t hard to see why the fandom had grown so large.

Fandom was always a joy for me. It was a hobby I picked up when I was in middle school, like many of us here did. I would always cater my experience to fun, and fun only. I only started getting more deeply involved in SU’s fandom when I had just turned into an adult. During the summer of 2016, between my first and second year of college, I drew for the show almost every day non-stop when the Summer of Steven event was going on and posted them online. This was a form of practice for me in order to become not just more comfortable with experimenting with my art, but also to meet new artists, make new friends, and learn to interact with strangers without fear. I dealt with a ton of anxiety when I was in high school. When I was a senior applying to art school for animation, I decided I was going to overcome that anxiety. I made plans to take baby steps to improve myself over the course of my 4 years of college. Joining the fandom, while unforeseen, was definitely a part of that process. I started feeling more confident in sharing my ideas, even if they were fan-made. I fell in love with storyboarding after that summer, when I took my first storyboarding class, and genuinely felt like I was actually getting somewhere with all of this. I remember finally coming to a point in my classes where I could pitch and not feel hopelessly insecure about it. I was opening up more to my friends and peers. 

But this process, unfortunately, came to a screeching halt. 

My life completely, utterly crumbled under me in the Fall of 2017 due to a series of blows in my personal life that happened in the span of just a couple weeks. My mental health and sense of identity were completely destroyed. All of that confidence I had worked for-- completely ruined. I was alone. I nearly died. My stay at college was extended to 4 and half years, instead of the 4 I had intended. I lost my love for animation-- making it, and watching it. I could no longer watch Steven Universe with the same love I had for it beforehand. It’s a terrible thing, trying to give your attention to something you don’t love anymore, and wanting so desperately to love again. I dropped so many things I loved in my life, including the fandom.

Healing was a long and complicated road. I continued to watch the show all the way up until Change Your Mind aired in the beginning of 2019, and while I still felt empty, that was definitely a turning point for me with it’s encapsulation of self-love. I was hoping James Baxter would get to work on Steven Universe since he guest-animated on Adventure Time, and it was incredible seeing that wish actually come true. The movie came out and while I enjoyed it and thought highly of it, I was still having issues letting myself genuinely love things again, old and new. It was especially difficult because cartoons were my solace as a kid, when things got rough at home. I remember feeling sad because the show ended, and not getting the chance to love it again like I used to while it was still going.

By the time Steven Universe Future was announced, I was finally coming around. I was genuinely starting to feel excitement for art and animation again. I wasn’t expecting there to be a whole new epilogue series, but happily ever after, there we were! Prickly Pear aired, and the implications it left in terms of where the story was going did it. I was finally ready to let myself take the dive back into fandom in January of this year. My art blew up, something I wasn’t expecting considering my 2-year hiatus. Following this, I was invited into a discord server containing some of the biggest writers, artists, editors, and analysts in the fandom. I had no idea there were so many talented people in the fandom, some already with degrees, some getting their degrees-- creating stuff for it on the side just for fun. The amount of passion and productivity level here is insane, and so is the amount of discussion that has come out of it.

I didn’t realize it at first, but it was actually helping me gain back the courage to share ideas. I lost my confidence in pitching while I was taking the time to heal, and graduating meant there would no longer be a classroom setting I could practice in. This group helped immensely. 

I have made so many friends through this wonderful series, and I have so many fond memories talking to like-minded creatives, getting feedback and a myriad of sources for inspiration, as well as all of the memes and jokes and weekly theorizations that came about as we all waited on the edges of our seats for episodes to air. I needed this so badly, I needed to get back in touch with my roots, when I would go absolutely hog-wild over a cartoon I loved with people who loved it as much I did. Future has been a blessing for me in this way. I graduated feeling like I was back at square-one, but now I feel like I’m on my way again.

It’s 2020 and while I’m doing great right now, I am honestly still recovering from the total exhaustion that followed after graduating a few months ago, and finally leaving the campus where my life fell apart behind. Needless to say, watching Future was like looking into a mirror. Watching one of my favorite characters of all time-- one that grew up with me-- go through so many of the same things I went through not too long ago was absolutely insane to watch unfold. It’s such an important thing too, to show a character go through the process of breaking down over trauma and all the nasty things that come with it, and to have them go on the road to healing. Steven got that therapy. He wasn’t blamed. The gems were called out. The finale was everything I could have ever hoped for. The catharsis I experienced watching it was out of this world.

As I continue my own healing journey, I will always look up to the storyboard artists, revisionists, and designers that I have been following over these past 7 years, as well as the new ones introduced in Future. It's been such a joy watching these artists release their promo art for episodes, talk about their experiences working on the show, and post the work they've done for it alongside episodes airing.

Thank you Rebecca Sugar, the Crewniverse, and the fans, for making this such a truly wonderful and unique experience. Thank you for reminding me that I am, and always will be, an artist, a cartoonist, and a fan. Thank you, my followers, for the overwhelmingly positive response to my artwork. I have had so much fun interacting and discussing the show with you all again over these past few months. Steven Universe and it’s fandom will always have a special place in my heart, and it will always be a classic that I will return to for comfort and inspiration for decades to come. I am sad that the cartoon renaissance is over, but so many doors have been opened thanks to this show. I am so, so excited to see what this show will inspire in the future, and I hope one day I get the opportunity to be a part of that. 

Goodbye Steven, thank you for everything. I wish you healing, and I wish Rebecca and the team a well-deserved rest. ♥️

-Cynthia D.

[90363462]

Everybody Loves Tyler James Williams

November 2, 2022

Tyler James Williams somehow looks different than he did a few years ago. Now that he’s starring in ABC’s hit series Abbott Elementary as the strict but charming schoolteacher Gregory Eddie, millions of viewers have fallen in love with him. But Williams has been around long enough to know when it’s real.

“That’s the downside of what’s happening currently. People don’t see me. They see Gregory,” the 30-year-old says. Some fans might be firing off thirst tweets, but Williams hasn’t forgotten the comments that were much less kind. “I remember in the early Twitter days, there were whole threads about how ugly and unattractive I was.” (Those unflattering tweets date back to 2012 when he was 20, and social media was roasting him for battle rapping in a Disney movie.) “Now, when I’m so shockingly attractive, people talk about it.” He laughs. It’s cool, though. “In a few years, it’s going to flip back.”

It’s a day of multiple talk show tapings around Manhattan for Williams. He’s just wrapped a photo shoot for this piece, and we’re chatting over carnitas tacos at a nearby restaurant. (“Not usually the best interview food, but let’s wild out,” he says.) He’s wearing an outfit that could have been thrifted from the set of Saturday Night Fever: houndstooth flare-leg pants and a white top unbuttoned to mid-chest — both custom-made. It’s flashier than anything Gregory would wear, but then again, he isn’t Greg.

When Abbott Elementary premiered in December 2021, its mockumentary format appealed instantly to viewers still in withdrawal over defunct workplace comedies like The Office. And similar to Parks and Recreation, Abbottinhabits a unique space as a sitcom with a moral core that’s, in this case, centered around a community of predominantly Black students — proxies of the kids often neglected by the education system in real life. Weeks before Season 2 premiered in September 2022 with quadruple the ratings, creator Quinta Brunsonearned her first Emmy for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series — the second Black woman to do so — while co-star Sheryl Lee Ralph won Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series for her role as the battle-tested teacher Barbara.

Williams picked up a Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series nomination for his performance as Greg. And though he didn’t take home an Emmy that night, his character’s Halpertian stares at the camera have become the audience’s surrogate, giving an otherwise upbeat show an irreverent edge. Then there’s what talk show host Tamron Hall calls the “swoon factor”: his slow burn will-they-won’t-they relationship with Brunson’s character, Janine. “This show leans into the fact that less is so much more, and he’s adept at doing less,” Ralph says of Williams. “There are so many subtleties to his performance.”

Ever since landing his breakout role as a young Chris Rock on the sitcom Everybody Hates Chris at age 12, Williams has been keenly aware of the connections audiences draw between himself and his characters. After shouldering the legacy of a comedic legend for four seasons, he shuffled through cameos and supporting parts: playing zombie apocalypse survivor Noah in Season 5 of The Walking Dead and gay Ivy Leaguer Lionel in 2014’s Dear White People. He first collaborated with Brunson in 2019 for a Romeo & Juliet spoof on HBO’s A Black Lady Sketch Show, where the two played star-crossed stans — he was a Barb; she was part of the Bardigang.

Abbott’s giving me room to breathe and feel safe again. I feel much more in control than I have with anything else.

A year later, at the height of the pandemic in early 2020, Brunson DM’d Williams about her pilot for Abbott Elementary. He’d been avoiding a return to network TV for years, but with Abbott, he knew he could trust Brunson to keep the material and his character honest. “Quinta protects Gregory as much as I do, and that’s something you don’t often find in network TV, where it’s a ratings game,” he says. “People will throw a character under the bus for a joke in a heartbeat. Abbott’s giving me room to breathe and feel safe again. I feel much more in control than I have with anything else.”

A sense of control is significant to a former child actor accustomed to being told what to do. Williams booked his first gig as a regular on Sesame Street and appeared on the children’s program from age 4 through 10. His most notable role, Everybody Hates Chris, was on a set dominated by stand-up comics, who, as Williams recalls, “are known to be rather abrasive.” With Abbott, he says, “Quinta wants to build a good working atmosphere that people want to stay in and around for.”

Williams himself lends his decades of experience to his castmates, who see him as a tenured teacher of the game. “He’s been in this industry practically his whole life, and he’s really paid attention to how it works,” says Ralph. “He lets you know about the numbers, what it means, how streaming affects the Big Five, how the industry is changing. I love that he’s got that kind of knowledge.”

Talking to a former child actor is much like asking a war vet about their time in the service — it’s a group few people belong to, and even fewer survive unscathed. But Williams no longer finds it weird to reflect. “The more I talk about it, the better I feel,” he says. “For a long time, I tried to outrun it, and it made things worse.”

Growing up in Yonkers, New York, Williams attended public school until sixth grade before being home-schooled. His father, Leroy Williams, worked as an NYPD sergeant, and his mother, Angela Williams, was a gospel singer and minister who oversaw the careers of Tyler and his younger brothers, Tyrel and Tylen. At 4, Tyler told his mom he wanted to act after watching Will Smith in Men in Black with her on home video. He would ask her to rewatch the movie every day, and they made a routine of analyzing films together.

Soon after, he started auditioning for roles; within six months, he landed his first commercial for the cold and allergy medicine Dimetapp. Unlike his mother, who herself had auditioned for commercials as a child and disliked the experience, Tyler was committed to acting. Raising Tyler and his brothers while navigating the stresses of the entertainment world inspired Angela to write a book guiding other parents through the process. In My Child is Going to Be Rich and Famous: How to Successfully Balance Family, Parenting, and Entertainment, she describes Tyler as a “dry-witted, observant” kid who was wise beyond his years and “selectively social.” Like many child actors, he had trouble finding friends who could relate to him.

Years later, people still ask Williams how he’s so well-adjusted. “We’re not as chaotic as I think most child actors get the [reputation for] being, but that doesn’t necessarily mean we adjusted well,” he says of himself and his brothers. “We had a lot to work through, and a lot of therapists got a lot of money from me.” He laughs. “That was the uphill fight and what feels like the fight of my career and life. Because [acting] is the only thing that I love like this. I lost 6 inches of my intestines to that.”

At 23 and between gigs, Williams’ Crohn’s disease flare-ups hindered his ability to work and kept him hospitalized; his surgeon attributed part of his physical distress to anxiety. Williams was just making the transition into adult roles and had become obsessed with constantly working to evade the fall from grace that struck many of his child-star peers. It only stoked his anxiety that he’d briefly shared a manager with Lindsay Lohan, the industry’s textbook example of a child actor who spiraled upon hitting adulthood. “I had the stories. I knew what to attempt to avoid,” he says. “But it's kind of like telling somebody there's a bunch of land mines outside, and here’s how you avoid them.”

I knew I could fall into this trap of child actors, and I was hyperaware of that. I think I overcompensated. I was really calculated in everything I did.

Finally, he hired a therapist to help confront his fears. “As a child, it’s really weird when your audience tells you that you did such a good job at something that they don’t want you to do anything else,” he says. “I knew I could fall into this trap of child actors and [be] known for one thing and never work again and just be a nostalgia artist, and I was hyperaware of that. I think I overcompensated. I was really calculated in everything I did.”

These days, Williams knows the business better and has used that awareness to reclaim control of his career. “At first, I was coasting on raw talent and seeing what would happen,” he says. “Now, my game is refined. I know what I’m doing.”

TV is full of stories about assholes and anti-heroes, but it’s hard to resist a sitcom that genuinely makes you smile. Williams points out that creator Shonda Rhimes once said her soapy political thriller Scandal could only have thrived during the Obama years. On the opposite end, Abbott is warmth in an age of darkness. Williams asks me if I feel good after watching an episode. Yes.

“I hope so,” he says. “I was looking at a bunch of pilots at the time and was like, these are heady, and mmm, that’s smart. But it had no heart to it. And this inherently did.”

Brunson wrote Gregory with Williams in mind from the start. “He’s someone who really embodies the everyday guy I wanted Gregory to be, and also I knew he had the sense of humor to pull off certain quirks,” Brunson explains. “We both approach comedy in a similar way. For the Janine and Gregory aspect, that makes them a bit more playful than most on-screen potential love interests.”

The surplus of streaming platforms has inched Black television content closer to a percentage that reflects our daily lives. But Hollywood has always struggled to sustain and nurture a consistent number of Black stories. Williams gets backhanded compliments about Abbott all the time. “People come up to me and say, ‘The main cast is Black, but it doesn’t feel like a Black show.’ And I’m like, well, what does that mean exactly?” he says. “Usually, when people say it’s a Black show, it has to be outside of awards contention and made for a niche market. For me, it’s good TV, regardless.”

A lot has and hasn’t changed in the time between Everybody Hates Chris and Abbott Elementary — both of which feature predominantly Black actors. “Shit, you saw with Everybody Hates Chris. We got nominated for the Golden Globe with Season 1, but we were ‘the Black show’ that was nominated. We weren’t [considered] one of the elite shows at the time. We suffered after the fact because of that,” says Williams. “Sheryl’s [Emmy] win [for Abbott] validates that in a way. It’s not this old-school mentality where there’s this stuff, and then there’s your stuff. It’s all good stuff. It just so happens to have a predominantly Black cast.”

To celebrate his 30th birthday in October, Williams attended a Bad Bunny concert in Los Angeles with his brothers and friends who also work in TV and film. Over the years, he’d been so overly cautious of his image that it felt good to let loose. “I spent so much of my 20s digging my way out of that child actor hole,” he says. “I don’t speak fluent Spanish, but I was in there hollering all the lyrics like I’m Puerto Rican. We got a box, and we partied.”

Williams lives with his brother Tylen in LA and is looking for a second place in New York. He’s single and opting for meet-cutes mainly on the exclusive, celebrity-populated dating app Raya. (“We can’t move via DM. Everything is being watched,” he says.) He was FaceTiming with a woman one day when his uncle walked into the room and, after the call, asked Williams if she would have talked to him if they met on the D train.

“I highly value people who look at me, and I’ve been able to tell since I was a child,” says Williams. “So that’s my criteria. Can you actually see me, or is this because it’s trendy?”

Top Image Credits: Tommy Hilfiger X Richard Quinn jacket and pants, Buck Mason T-shirt

Talent Bookings: Special Projects

Photo Director: Alex Pollack

SVP Fashion: Tiffany Reid

SVP Creative: Karen Hibbert

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

For Caldyn

🌙 What are some of your OC’s favourites? Favourite food, colour, season, stuff like that! Give some general simple facts that tend to get overlooked!

💧 What is something from your OC’s past they’re the most ashamed of and why? What is something they’re really proud of? And lastly what is something in their past that could make them shake with dread?

💗 Ramble a bit about this character!

Ty for the ask <3 From this ask game.

🌙 What are some of your OC’s favourites? Favourite food, colour, season, stuff like that! Give some general simple facts that tend to get overlooked!

He really likes non-sweet baked things. He’ll be a big fan of garlic bread once he gets his hands on it, and bread in general.

He always loved to sit near water, rivers, lakes, waterfalls. He likes water a lot.

He also prefers water over flavored drinks most of the time.

He enjoys natural materials for his sleeping place; dried moss and leaves and grass. He’s not a big fan of blankets and the like, he doesn’t find the feeling of it on his leaves very pleasant. He can appreciate a good pillow, though!

There are no seasons where he lives.

💧 What is something from your OC’s past they’re the most ashamed of and why? What is something they’re really proud of? And lastly what is something in their past that could make them shake with dread?

He’s not really ashamed of anything. A bit embarrassed perhaps about a thing or two, but nothing major.

He’s a bit proud that he got an invitation to be a healer in the blue healers’ house (which has this name because it’s blue.. d’oh) soon after he finished class. Only the best healers work there. He declined, though, to live in the outskirts instead. (Which probably is for the better, because I don’t think our soft boy would have lasted long there :( It’s where they brought him, too.)

Yea, well, that would be those last 18 days! :D There is nothing else in his past that comes close.

💗 Ramble a bit about this character!

Wellll where do I start. I’m not quite sure anymore what all my thoughts 2014 were, but I am pretty sure even back then there was the question: Can I write a whole novel story from the point of view of a blind char? I had a roleplaying char who was blind many years ago (it was in a game that was wild, so having an elderly blind hobbit (no trauma there... well not blindness related, lots of others. I swear that whole game was whumpers in disguise) among arch demons, vampires, witches and whatnot was super funny lol) and I kinda missed it? I hope that doesn’t sound too weird or insensitive now. 

As a live role play (not live action, it was chat based!) there wasn’t really time to plan anything, so it all came down to really, at every moment, know what she could know, and how. There is no going back and editing out “oops, guess she couldn’t have seen that.”

I probably saw writing related questions like “how could that ever work, there would be no descriptions” and thought “well of course it works”, and I grabbed Caldyn, and it did.

I was also trying to balance what he can use his magic for - feeling things that are alive - with not falling into the good old “give them magic that fully negates their blindness” trope. I do think I managed, but I know some people will still hate it, guess that’s life *shrug*

It also was super fun to find a solution for every time I wanted to describe something and had to decide: Does he remember? Does someone describe it to him? Who and why? For example, to kinda introduce Seyonna, she talks him out of a panic attack by babbling about the first thing that comes to her mind, which is her glow, and her color.

In the end, I’m having so much fun with him, that I’ve been neglecting the next project I wanted to write since November, because I just want to write more about him 😅

[iwanthermidnightz]

Hey IWHM! I'm sorry. This is so long and you might not share it--but I had to share it anyway.

Has anyone discussed this little "invisible string" with Kaylor. It is literally fucking crazy TBH.

Remember in 2014 when Taylor had that Scholastic Kids sit down interview? In that interview she told the kids that her favorite book growing up was Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli because "it's about a girl who is very different than everybody else in her school. People call her weird, but no matter how much they make fun of her, she continues to be herself, and pretty soon, that individuality starts to rub off on everyone else, and they all want to be like her."

Okay. The strings!

What goes on in the story?

"Stargirl, who up till now has been homeschooled, starts school at Mica High as a 10th grader, where LEO is starting his 11th grade year. Stargirl's entrance to school is a big deal for all the students in this small ARIZONA town. She immediately starts stir with her qack outfits and even more wacky behavior."

STARgirl = Taylor (💫)

LEO and 11th = KK the "magnetic force of a man." (🦁)

ARIZONA = Where rep tour started and of course 🌵🍊 (👀)

And there is more...

"The prologue wastes no time telling us that the narrator, Leo Borlock, is attracted to the unusual in our world. This becomes clear when he tells us about his love of porcupine ties. Through this seemingly small detail about him, a whole series of spectacular events is placed in motion. Leo's mother places a birthday announcement in the paper for him when he turns fourteen that tells of his penchant for the porcupines. Little did he know till much, much later that Stargirl Caraway, a most unusual and fascinating young lady, would read this and send an unsigned gift to him. This is the first of many mysteries that Stargirl brings to Leo's life and to the lives of all the other people lucky enough to be around her."

"She does all sorts of stuff that students at Mica High just don't get. Most importantly, she's friendly all the time, even though no one seems friendly back."

Oh... a very familiar Taylor feeling. 🤔

"a few things fall together for Stargirl, and after a very entertaining incident at a football game, she joins the cheerleading squad. Bingo. She's in. Suddenly, she's popular, and Leo's thoughts become more and more consumed with her."

Wow... just wow... 💫💫

But the dream can't last forever, folks. Her enthusiastic cheerleading, which made her popular in the first place, eventually leads to Stargirl's downfall. She cheers for everyone, in every situation, not just her home team. And while the students are happy with her upbeat kindness when it's aimed at them, they totally turn on her when her kindness extends to a member of the opposing team. Her fall from popularity is fast and ruthless. Everyone stops talking to her with the exception of two people: her one loyal friend, Dori Dilson, and Leo, who is too dizzy in love to see what's really going on."

👀 Say what now!?? LEO IS "DIZZY IN LOVE." 🤣🤣

When Leo emerges a bit from his foggy love-haze, he realizes the full extent of the shunning and also realizes that he is a target, too. Yikes. This thrusts him smack-dab in the middle of an internal conflict that continues for much of the rest of the novel. 👀

He continues to stand by her side, but breaks down one day and tells her how bummed he is now that everyone hates him. He tells her that she has to change in order for them to stay together. Stargirl cries, and then just like that, she disappears

Literally Karlie's real life situation played out! STOP it!! 🤯

This book was written 20 years ago guys. Why is so relatable to Karlie and Taylor 20 years later.

I mean, the Leo in love with the Star and it risked his reputation standing by her. 😭

Can't make this shit up. It's So wild that this was Taylor's favorite book as a child and she talks about it during the 1989 era, and her life kind of paralleled Stargirl's. Blew my mind.

This book was published August 8th, 2000--👀 funny. 20 years ago. 🤣 Out of all the months to be published and on the 8th--20 years later, 8th album she puts out during Leo Season!

"Have in known you 20 seconds or 20 years..."

Invisible Strings folks...💫🤷🏽‍♀️

[cadecaptain]

The Post Everyone Has Been Waiting For: Cade’s Top 10 Albums of All Time

Honorable Mentions:

The Beastie Boys Paul’s Boutique (1989)

A few years ago this album would have definitely cracked my top 10, and it is still so solid. The production on this thing is out of this world, and if you ever have a day to kill, listening to this Spotify playlist that has all of the samples Paul’s Boutique holds is an adventure, and truly shows what a labor of love this album is. 

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/59FdNgdN0lHFNdr3ZsTTPa

Best Song: High Plains Drifter

The Rolling Stones Exile on Main St. (1972) 

As a general rule of thumb, I don’t like long albums. Blame it on my short attention span, but it is hard for me to believe any album over 11-12 songs couldn’t have anything cut. This album is one I can easily have on repeat, despite its 18 song tracklist. Truly the best of the Stones. 

Best Song: Tumbling Dice

10. The Black Crowes The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion (1992)

Bringing 70′s rock back to the 90′s, this is one of the first albums I remember loving as a kid. It is the epitome of Dad Rock, and each song has the entire band firing on all cylinders. Chris Robinson’s vocals on each and every track gives me chills, as he wears his heart on his sleeve with an emotional and powerful delivery with each lyric. Every time I listen to this record I come away with a new favorite track. 

Best Song: Thorn in My Pride

9. Only Real Jerk at the End of the Line (2015) 

Every time I tell someone about this album I always say “This is what Ed Sheeran would sound like if he was actually good”. He has the British, fast speaking, break-up sound down to a science, with each track feeling like it was meticulously crafted both lyrically and production-wise. This album had such an impact on me in high school that it is hard not to have it higher. If Only Real dropped a new album, y’all wouldn’t hear from me for a few days. 

Best Song: Cadillac Girl 

8. Alvvays Self Titled (2014) 

So up until about a year and a half ago, I swore up and down that the newest Alvvays record, Antisocialities, was better than this one, their first, self-titled LP. I have been fully converted by my girlfriend (@peppermoths​) that this is the superior album. This album feels like a gloomy summer night in the best way possible, and has a diverse tracklist of songs that make me feel sad, happy, and like riding a bike.

Best Song: Next of Kin 

7. Billy Idol Rebel Yell (1983)

This is the album I have based my personality on this summer. This, to me, is the quintessential album of the 80′s, with every track feeling like it could be playing in the background of The Lost Boys. I love everything about it. Every time I listen to this album, I realize how similar it is to David Bowie’s Let’s Dance both in length and general 80′s feel. 

Best Song: Eyes Without a Face

6. Camp Lo Uptown Saturday Night (1997)

It is impossible to not have fun listening to this record. One of (if not THE) most slept on 90′s hip-hop albums. It is a shame there aren’t more 90′s Camp Lo projects, but at the same time, this album is so flawless to me that I would be worried it would make their image less cool. USN has every kind of song you need off a 90′s album, and it always makes me want to boogie. 

Best Song: Tied: Sparkle & Killin’ Em Softly 

5. Parliament Mothership Connection (1975)

What is there to say about any George Clinton project that doesn’t include: AHEAD OF ITS TIME. Mothership Connection is the epitome of this. I have always claimed that this is the album that got me out of my emo music phase, as my cousin played it for me once and I fell in love and ditched Fall Out Boy. This album is short but it doesn’t feel like it, and every song will make you get up out of your chair. (Also, if this was a list of best album covers of all time, this would probably be #1). 

Best Song: Handcuffs 

4. David Bowie Young Americans (1975)

I’ll die on the hill that this is objectively the best Bowie project. This album is stacked without a single skip, and is the perfect length at a meaty 8 songs. From beginning to end, Bowie is able to construct an album that is as diverse as it can get while still feeling the most consistent out of any of his albums. You can tell that Young Americans had a lot of work put into it, and it paid off. 

Best Song: Right 

3. Grapetooth Self Titled (2018)

Do you ever hear a song and think...wow...I wish I had wrote that? That’s how I feel with every track on the Grapetooth self titled. If you are a Twin Peaks fan, you should hear a familiar voice gracing the tracklist, and the iconic sound of Clay Frankel’s voice is put on full display on an album straight out of 1985. There isn’t a song on this LP that ever stops growing on you.

Best Song: Tied: Violent & Hangover Sq. 

2. Bruce Springsteen The Wild, The Innocent, & the E Street Shuffle (1973)

This is an album that requires about 10-20 listens to fully appreciate. The tracklist is short, at only 7 songs, but the average length of a song on Springsteen’s sophomore LP is around 6-7 minutes, so it is still about a 50 minute listen. I heard in a Bruce documentary that this album was considered a flop because of this exact reason; they couldn’t play these weird, long songs on the radio. However, I genuinely think this is Bruce at his finest, spinning a complex lyrical web that makes you feel like you are 17 and on the boardwalk. This was the album right before Born to Run, so it is often overshadowed, but don’t tell me listening to Rosalita (Come Out Tonight) doesn’t make you want to speed down the highway. Also, Bruce looks very sexy on the cover. 

Best Song: Rosalita (Come Out Tonight) 

1. The Sundays Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic (1990)

I don’t even know how to do this album justice with words. I have never found an album with as much lyrical depth, ear-worm, jangly, timeless instrumentals, and repeat value as this one. Everything that this album is is sold by lead singer Harriet Wheeler leaving nothing to be desired with a perfect vocal performance on every single track. I could listen to this album for a week straight and never get tired of it. I have pretty much done that all summer, and I’m still not sick of it. Please go listen to this album if you haven’t yet.

Best Song: I could not choose one if I tried. Literally all of them. 

[doomedandstoned]

Gangrened Conjure Dizzying Atmosphere in ‘Deadly Algorithm’

~Review by Billy Goate~

Before us lies an enigma called 'Deadly Algorithm' (2021) by Finnish band GANGRENED, whom we've introduced you to before, when they dropped that wonderfully dreary doomer 'We Are Nothing' (2014). Let me share with you the diary of my thoughts as I immersed myself in their recently released full-length.

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

Deadly Algorithm starts with gentle, quiet picking that echoes faintly, but already surrounds us with a strange, if inviting, airspace. A melodic line develops as "Harrbåda" gains volume, building it seems towards a crescendo -- then suddenly stopping as a drumroll interrupts. The atmosphere returns to quirks and quarks, increasingly distorted notes, spikes of reverberating rhythm. All the while, the same short impermanent melodic motif makes its statement, until it flitters away into the void.

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

"Triptaani" makes a strong entrance, this time with galled vocal attack and a slow, but strong, guitar lead girded by the fuzz-sparked gears of bass and drum languidly moving this machine along. A hail of shredding follows, with cymbals crashing to a throbbing beat, leading to one ardent chord laid upon another. Eventually the pace slows to a crawl, with dissonant harmonies, and a wild solo from Jon Imbernon that's almost overcome by the industrial crunch of Lassi Männikkö's dumming, Joakim Udd's vile spew of noise, Mikko Mannistö's declamatory singing.

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

"Hologrammi" features more familiar doom pacing with a searing riffage, a slow burn flow of bass and drums, and clean (but pissed off) crooning. It's surrounded by a mesmerizing jumble of pedal effects, noise, downtuned instrumental buzz, and crackling amps -- of which make its climactic moment of vocal delivery emphatic and powerful.

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

Intricate guitar trilling action introduces “Kuningatar” and it sounds almost like temelos dancing upon its appointed harmonic scale in those opening moments. By the time the rest of the crew sounds off, it turns into a frightening ensemble, indeed. I imagine this would be quite chilling to experience in a live setting. While the vocals feel swallowed up in the great reverberating wall of sound, it seems to add to the mystique of the whole dim sound environment. Psychedelic noodling returns six minutes and if you listen carefully you can hear a seething malediction pronounced sternly beneath the fray of scattered noise, synth, and pedal effects. Great doom returns to ground us to reality and the band improvises a swirl of activity that makes me think of the wandering spirits released from the Ark of the Covenant in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

”Triangeli” grabs hold of us with a rumbling bass line that establishes the song’s basic theme, soon to be reinforced by guitar. Meanwhile, words are spoken with accented cymbals and hypnotic drumming. The song ends with whispered lyrics uttered over a soundgarden of riffage, soft cymbals, omnipotent bass rumble, and the cycling sounds of amp feedback. I don't know the words, and the singer refuses to share them, so that means what he's singing is left up to your fertile imagination. Or you can just enjoy the vocal aesthetic and what it contributes to this dense, dark atmosphere.

A cathartic journey, indeed, which I ventured on while I was in an especially discouraged and pissed off mood. Even though I understood not its words, I felt its sentiment and it was in some way cleansing. Available digitally, on vinyl and compact disc as an independent release (order here).

Interviewing Gangrened Guitarist Jon Imbernon

By Billy Goate

You've been a band for quite a while. I understand you are one of the founding members, too. How did Gangrened form to begin with?

Well, we were a bunch of guys living in the same area around ostrobotnia, between kokkola and new karleby, here in the center west coast of finland. so few of us had the idea to do the band so we asked the others, but none of those guys except me are still in the band. high level of mobility because studies in this area of small towns, to bigger cities of Finland.

It sounds like there are challenges keeping a band together in Ostrobotnia? I imagine it makes it ver5y challenging to get new band members to replace the old. Is there much of a music scene to speak of?

Yeah, actually I'm not from here myself. I'm Basque/Spanish and in the specific area I live, like around 110 kilometers or so, there's no real bands or scene, but if you go forward you reach Oulu in the north or Seinajoki, bigger cities with more bands and such. And yes, from the exact spot I live now, I have needed to look more than 100 kms to find new members. I'm moving in a near future to Tampere, so that should help in strengthening the line-up.

So how long has the most recent crew of Gangrened been together?

Since May of 2015, just after some dates we played with Bongzilla in Finland, the entire line-up shifted.

Gangrened basically means "gangrene" right?

It's like "corrupted," you know? Yes, the name comes from the illness.

My grandfather's big toe got infected from a cut because he didn't treat it properly. When he finally went to a doctor, they told him he would have to amputate his foot to live. He refused, stating he wanted to die with both of his feet on. So he officially died of gangrene!

Ouch! Okay...

Did you pick Gangrened for any special reason, like the corruption of society or something like that?

Yeah, that kind of reason. I wanted some grimmy name, but actually now it's getting a bit inappropriate, as we are not so typically doom sludge anymore.

How would you describe/characterize your sound now?

Well, I would say it is deep and varied. Actually, I think this record is like transitional, just because, for example, one song "Hologrammi" is an old song we included. But newer stuff goes beyond what has been previously recorded, take songs like "Triangeli" or "Kuningatar."

Deadly Algorithm by Gangrened

We reviewed 'We Are Nothing' back in 2014, and at the time we described your sound in terms of: "Slow, behemoth sized riffs. Excessive feedback. Fuzz worship." What would you say has changed or is different now, as your sound, style, and general musical approach has evolved?

Well, at some point, just as an exercise of abstraction to what we were doing, how it was turning out with songs like "Triangeli" or "Kuningatar" I decided to look into my whole musical background, and keep on adding elements from it. Also I got bored of the regular sludge-doom thing. So I considered it more interesting, and more comfortable to me, to keep an essence of slow and heavy music, and atmospheric at times, but not so defined inside the regular sludge-doom thing. The atmosphere feels very trippy, even psychedelic at times.

Let's talk about the new album. Why is it called 'Deadly Algorithm'? I think about 10 years ago, I never used the word "algorithm," but now it's a common word that most people at least understand in concept.

Well, I'm studying now in the university again, engineering in information technology, and at same time i'm a person a lot with strong progressive values, so through my studies and also digging on related topics like online privacy or the evolution and development of the new technologies I found alarming how the new technologies are going and its implications.

There are several key things that many people do not think about: smart phones have like six sensors on average to spot your location, plus no company gives services for free. If so, it's because the product is the user of the service. There's no other reason for that. So beginning with these facts, there are a lot of things going on that everyone should be aware of, and the album theme is all about that. Nowadays, data algorithms are making more and more decisions in our lives that no more take into account true needs as humans.

It seems like we have created our own virtual prison, without even realizing it.

Yes, but the thing is who runs the prison? not ourselves at all.

Getting into the songs themselves, are they all sung in Finnish?

Yes. At first some were in english but then the singer decided to sing all songs in Finnish.

Starting with the first song, can you tell us what each title means and what themes you explore?

The first song ("Harrbåda") is simply the name of a coastal area around here. The second ("Triptaani") is a medicine for headaches. The third song ("Hologrammi") is named obviously after a hologram. The fourth ("Kuningatar") means "Queen" and the last ("Triangeli") is "triangle."

Is there any conceptual, thematic, or spiritual relationship between these tracks?

It's quite a personal thing to the singer, he wrote the lyrics and I can't exactly tell you their meaning because Mikko Mannistö is a bit secretive about it. But personal things, yes. Personal matters to him.

Tell us a little bit about the recording process. Where did you record, with whom, and are there any memories that stand out from that time?

Well, we started recording the record in june 2018, with a friend of the singer, at some big rooms in a youth center house. We did most of the recordings with him until February of 2019. At that time, we asked a few people to mix, master, and finish the process. but nothing worked and there was some time wasted waiting for answers.

I decided moving forward we would go with someone who is recording records all the time and known by us, so we asked Tom Brooke, an English guy who lives close to Jyväskylä, runs a studio, and is the live sound technician for Oranssi Pazuzu. So we finished the record, a few more guitar tracks, mixing, and mastering with him.

I remember there was a long time between sessions, so new ideas were constantly coming to us to add to the songs for the next session. That’s why some guitar tracks were added for mixing just the day before starting to mix.

I'm sure you were relieved once all the recording, mixing, and mastering was finally done!

Yeah ! like this is the record and now its totally defined and wrapped up. As a guitarist, what can you tell us about the guitar writing on the new album? Anything that you are especially proud of or that you think the listener should pay special attention to?

The intro is all played by me, and then the weirdest stuff, noisy guitar here and there, and the first half of riffs of triptaani , i'm quite proud of the first two or three riffs, and I used to be proud about some riffs in the middle of "hologrammi." The noisiest and more psyched out guitars of kuningatar.

Tell us about what you, as a guitarist, used in the studio while recording 'Deadly Algorithm'

Well, so I used three guitars to record the album: one Gibson SG Standard from the late '90s, another SG Standard from 1980, and a Gibson Les Paul Classic from around 1991. The SG from the late '90s was ultra-modded -- I changed the finish, pickups, electronics, tuners, but in the end sold it and now it's owned by David from Slomatics. The 1980 I just bought for the recording, so it was all stock. Later, I changed the pickups. The Gibson Les Paul also had all replaced tuners, circuit pickups, and so. It's my main guitar and I used it in most of the songs. The SGs I just used for "Triangeli," the last song.

About effects, I use a Big Muff Fuzz mainly, but also a custom Dunwich Amps FuzzThrone for the ultra heavy parts, like at the end of "Kuningatar." Other effects I used were the Dunlop Echoplex pedal and the Strymon Capistan. I love tape echo sounds and these pedals emulate it. Also, another effect I really like and couldn't live without is the Earthquaker Devices Transmisser. I used it in three of the songs.

Amps used included an '80s Laney AOR Pro Tube and Orange OR120 from 1975 and a late '70s Matamp GT120. Every rhythm guitar track was recorded with two of them at same time, mainly the Matamp and the Laney. That probably is the main sound of the album, but I think "Hologrami" I recorded with the Orange and the Matamp. About cabs, I used two Orange cabs -- one with Eminence speakers the other with WGS speakers.

Have you had a chance to play live at all since the pandemic?

Nope, we haven't been rehearsing either.

If you had your choice to tour with any five bands and play in any five places, what would they be and why?

We are keeping it for when there's no risk of cancellations, we have some date plans and so on, but it sucks to cancel things so we are just waiting. I would play with Unsane in New York for example then some bands I have liked recently, even if some are inactive at this moment. Belzebong, Nightslug, Domkraft, Follakzoid, and the body also.

That would be a sick line-up!

What parts of the world would you like to travel to?

Well, I've never been to America or Asia. I have been to Europe, the UK, and Russia only.

Okay, yeah it would be cool to have you come over here and play for us sometime.

Yeah, would be nice

Lastly, did you all wear your heart on the opposite sides of your head for this photo to give the illusion that your heads are on backwards? Or was it digitally manipulated to make it look like your heads were on the wrong way? I love the concept!

I made that pic myself. I took two photographs, one of us in front and another in the backs. So then I took the heads of the back picture and put on our front bodies pic, with Photoshop. David lynch-ish vibes!

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[duallygirl178]

Dearest O'Malley Introduction

Introduction

"My life had started on a conveyer belt at a Chevrolet manufacture in 1967. I was white as a cloud but glossy with shine. It was all at a factory in Arlington Texas united states. There are two Chevrolet factories located in the USA; one in Texas and the other in Bowling Green Kentucky. There is also one in Ingersoll Ontario, Canada and another in South Korea in current use. Usually Chevrolet Malibu cars were made in Hamtramck, Michigan and in Detroit as my ancestry goes back, but I was proudly born and raised in Texas. My mother came from Detroit and my father came from the longhorn state in Texas where the longhorn cattle roamed and nestled and also where the football team played in the kick-off at the stadium. When I was 12 months old, I was weaned, sold, and transported to Farmington New Mexico. There in that town, were some parts that reminded me of Texas...since I was born there that reminded me of my home that Farmington had so I didn't get homesick. I had one sister, and three older brothers that were shipped into different states of America that I never saw again. My lucky brother; Edgar ended up on Route 66, close to my mother's home state and he was living like a king. As again, I was rowdy and wild outside, but kind-hearted inside for a young stud from Texas. I sure didn't have the accent, but I fought like one and if they got fresh with a Texan, they'd better watch out. They were tough and bared no mercy on the sinners making fun of them.

My story had a unique pattern where it starts as fiction-like back-story and plays onto historical events and comes back to fiction again. Now, I know it sounds like an unusual autobiography, but I heard stories that were like that just like Eleanor Roosevelt before she met her husband or like President John F. Kennedy, but with a true story that it just had some parts missing and covered up because it was unbearable to put in the textbooks. it was so classified that even historians took it out so the teachers wouldn't tell their students about what those parts happened that got covered up like the happening where John was invited to an extraterrestrial space craft and the real assassination on him for sharing alien information that wasn't suppose to know. Right now, I'll lay out a summery of what's ahead in my story. First I'll start by coming from an abusive husband that would kick me, then going home to Gladas Kennedy to Joe Popplewell, to be driven around a while by Jan and Randy to bonding with Nathan and to making a match for him by meeting Natalie. There was a lot in my life that happened. I had many moments where I got attention from people in town that I was a nice car and it delighted me to see people interested in legends like myself to be out and rolling, unlike the cars made today that are made out of plastic and look nothing like the original cars like the chargers and the newest Malibu designs. When people passed me by, some of them would laugh, which could only mean one thing; they were blind and had no taste. I didn't usually give a care on the insult and I just drop it and walk away not caring to look into the bother. I did things years ago that I enjoyed and never looked back at because it was long gone that happened in the years, put behind me such as trouble with the law and moon shining in the woods and getting familiarized with marijuana laws in states that allow it like in Colorado. They call it medicine when it can make you high for days. Now, New Mexico was working on getting it legalized because hey, Colorado spreads the word that it can help cure and reduce pain. Durango had a lot of stoners that say they were impressed and why in the world does New Mexico need more tweekers? In the 60s, marijuana was a gateway into serenity rather if you were a hippie or just horsing around. It still was a thing then and will be now. There is a lot of advantages of growing up in the 1960s like dating, diners road racing, moon shining, cruising, groovy television shows that weren't terrible and the swap meets that weren't bad. I even got to see my first movie at the drive in with a female on a date called "American Graffiti" and I kissed in the back while settled in "park" so I could get a far away seat. My eyesight was far sighted and felt comfortable I the back. The love of my life which was a 67 impala treated me out for our second month anniversary of our relationship. I had remembered when I first met her at a random club where I was singing about my life just for her in 1968.

When the 1970s arrived, my friend; Impa went missing, Gonzo; my best friend, went AWOL Texas-ape crazy and we had the cops search the entire woods...nothing was found except Impa's keychain. So they gave up and I never saw Impa again but I wondered what happened to him. I went to my second home and my owner; Gladas drove me around to work, grocery stores, and church. I met some pretty bad and rotten eggs that needed the "Texas-boy treatment" and to be taught a lesson at Gladas's work which I took the honors of beating them up.

Then, I came to my third home in the 1980s where I met Joe and Carol; the grandparents of Nathan in whom I didn't meet Nathan until later right after Gladas stopped driving me. Joe took the charge of caring for me when I needed something. I'd start right up for him. I met Ian, a blue Buick under the carport which was my stall mate. Carol didn't like him, but Carol liked me because I was so big. I also had met Randy and Jan in a reunion and at the time, Jan was carrying a little bundle of joy when she came to see Joe. Unfortunately, I've never been a father because I've never met the right female that wanted ankle biters running around. When 1992 had come, Nathan was born and to get to know each other, Jan and Randy would take Nathan for a ride in me while Nathan was seated in the backseat. Jan thought I was a scary ride, but Randy thought I was pretty cool. Randy and I got along like beans and cornbread. For being borrowed until Jan got a new car, I enjoyed being the only car to be driven. So I was driven once again to work in and to the grocery stores.

When 2014 hit, Nathan was already handing out with girls. There was a basic one named Shay I didn't like her because she didn't appreciate classic cars as much as Nathan or Natalie did. She weighed 240 pounds and it was like carrying a giant boulder. I think she wasn't worth hanging around because she'd ditch Nathan to go hang out with Jerome. I had to do something to keep Nathan supported and so I kept my eyes on him. When shay was out of the picture, I had my picture taken in 2014 at a car show and again in 2015. Seeing the same brunette girl made me realize that she would be perfect for Nathan, but she seemed so shy. A few years later. I parked in the carport again and nowadays I had wished Nathan would open up and meet people like the one they used to in my day. However, it was all online. When Natalie came along, she changed everything in Nathan’s life forever. He didn't used to like watching movies, but now he does. I had never seen him so happy and it was all thanks to me who opened the door to make them a couple

Therefore, here's how my life started out as the way it is

[burkymakar]

Hi! I was wondering if you could post the Athletic's Olympic roster predictions please?!

ok here’s a lot under the cut, i’ve included men and womens for both Canada and USA. 

Canada Mens

Remember how the 2018 Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang unfolded? Canada won a hard-earned bronze medal playing a stingy brand of defence under coach Willie Desjardins and lost only a single game in regulation – to Germany in the semifinals – before defeating the Czech Republic to earn a place on the podium.

Just one thing was missing: NHL players. Hockey’s crème de la crème. Three years ago, the NHL decided not to participate in the Winter Olympics for a lot of reasons that made little sense to the hockey world which made the Games look a little like the Spengler Cup.

Thankfully, as part of the collective bargaining extension signed last summer, the NHL is returning to compete in the 2022 Winter Olympics in Beijing — assuming the logistical details can be ironed out among the league, the IIHF and the IOC and that the pandemic is under some sort of control.

With apologies to all the players who competed so hard for Canada in 2018, the selection process this time around will be far more difficult because of the staggering depth of the talent pool.

One thing Canada never lacks at the highest level of hockey is oodles of options at both forward and defence. The players who don’t make the grade for Canada would fill out a ‘B’ team that would contend for gold.

How might Team Canada 2022 look? Thought you’d never ask. In our eternal quest to be helpful to the managerial powers-that-be, here are our projections for a 25-player roster, which is what the IOC permitted for Sochi in 2014.

As always, remember that in Canada, for an exercise such as this one, there really aren’t many bad options. Just too many good ones.

The last time men’s hockey had a best-on-best tournament was back in 2016 and if that World Cup taught us anything, it is that the younger generation of players dominating the game today had no stage fright whatsoever when they were got a chance to play together as North America’s 23-and-under team. They were fun to watch and unlucky not to advance to the medal round.

In previous Olympics, sometimes Canada’s management team would opt for veteran players over young up-and-comers because of a fear that they might be overwhelmed by the moment. Team Canada’s biggest Olympic bobble in the NHL era came in 2006 and you wonder what might have happened if they’d injected the youth and vigour of Sidney Crosby onto a team that seemed slow and plodding on the big ice of Turin.

By contrast, the decision to go with the 20-year-old Drew Doughty in Vancouver proved quite prescient – he was one of the key contributors that year and then again in 2014 in Sochi, as Canada won back-to-back golds.

Nowadays, Doughty is one of the more polarizing players in the game. He still plays a ton of minutes for the Los Angeles Kings and oozes confidence. On a blue line that features a whole lot of next-gen talent – from Cale Makar and Shea Theodore to Thomas Chabot and Morgan Rielly — chances are they’ll opt for one or two steadying veterans on the blue line. We’ve selected Alex Pietrangelo and Doughty to fill out what is otherwise a talented but relatively green defence corps that’ll get the puck up to the forwards, with great dispatch and accuracy.

Canada’s 2014 gold-medal team won with a stingy brand of hockey and timely saves from Carey Price, whenever he was called upon. That can be a challenge sometimes – playing goal on a team that surrenders few Grade-A opportunities and tests your level of focus and concentration because there will be the occasional breakdown that you will need to be in a position to respond to.

Long-term, Carter Hart will likely take over from Price as Canada’s go-to starter in goal, but there are still some inconsistencies in his game that drops him down to the No. 2 position. One wild card I considered here was the Devils’ Mackenzie Blackwood, who had an excellent rookie season last year and was off to a good start this year as well. Chances are if Blues’ GM Doug Armstrong has the final say, Jordan Binnington would likely be the third goalie on this roster.

All of which leads us to the hardest, most controversial decisions which involve the forward group. There’s the usual problem of having too many natural centres on the roster and so someone will have to switch to the right wing. Among the elite-level centres in Canada, both Nathan MacKinnon and Mark Scheifele are right-handed shots and could swing over to the wing. One likely will have to and in this scenario, it’s Scheifele, if only so that MacKinnon and Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, who developed some familiarity playing for Team North America in the World Cup, can play together.

That creates some flexibility if the coach – we’re picking Barry Trotz – ultimately wants to shift Nugent-Hopkins up to Connor McDavid’s line.

Splitting Crosby and Brad Marchand may also just be temporary. In 2016, those two along with Patrice Bergeron were the clear top line for Canada, and scored all the important goal. But Bergeron will be 36 by the time the Olympics roll around, and thus, didn’t make the final group here. You could theoretically put Marchand, Crosby and MacKinnon (playing right wing) together on an all-Nova Scotia line and the chemistry could be magical.

The beauty of Canada’s roster is the versatility of so many of the better forwards – Ryan O’Reilly, Sean Couturier, Brayden Point and Bo Horvat could all play the wing as well as down the middle. Chances are, every line that Canada rolls out will include two natural centres making face-off match-ups easier for the coaching staff, if they can fit both a right- and a left-hand centre onto each line.

The bottom line: With a player pool so deep, Canada has incredible talent and flexibility. Talent enough to get the go-ahead goal in a tight game.

Flexibility enough to juggle lines as needed and get the defensive match-ups as required. The greatest coaching challenge is usually selling a one-for-all and all-for-one vision. If a star player is forced to adopt a secondary role, he’ll need to handle it with maturity and grace and cannot start pouting because he isn’t the first option on the PP or the PK the way he might be on his club team.

Managing egos is as big a part of the job for the coaching staff as setting lines and spooling out ice time. — Eric Duhatschek

I’m going to keep this very simple.

Hockey Canada has a formula. It involves a few key rules that have helped Team Canada dominate best-on-best competition to an unprecedented degree over the past decade:

1) Everyone plays on their strong side.

2) Wherever possible, bring pairs of players that play together in the NHL so you have an immediate chemistry advantage in a short tournament.

3) Bring extra centres and just have them play on the wall.

4) Experience and tenure matter. If you were on the last team and are still elite, you have an edge in the event all other factors are equal.

Now, Hockey Canada has also opted to play grinding, low event hockey over the past decade. It’s cynical, it’s ruthless and it delivers gold.

However, this approach stinks. It shows a certain ruthless focus, which I appreciate, but it actually lacks any grander ambition.

Hockey Canada could aspire for more. They should aspire for greatness.

They should aspir for a national men’s team with the purpose of articulating a national vision of a beautiful, skillful and yet still assertive and physical two-way brand of hockey. Canada’s men’s team could play hockey beautifully if Canada decided to play hockey beautifully, and that’s what this team is going to do — within the framework of Hockey Canada’s otherwise winning formula.

Right off the top, I’ve built the fastest first line in the history of the sport. McDavid moves to the wing mostly for handedness reasons. A top line of McDavid, MacKinnon and Mathew Barzal are going to test the limits of what’s possible to accomplish in hockey playing at the highest possible speed.

Until one of Marchand, Crosby and Bergeron fall off and aren’t among the NHL’s best individually, they’re a set line for Hockey Canada. This is the easiest choice there is. They have chemistry, experience, swagger as a group, and they bring the DNA of Hockey Canada’s decade-of-dominance to this forward group.

The third line is where things get interesting, particularly because this is where the toughest omission from my team — Jonathan Huberdeau — kicks in. Ultimately I’m going to make a decision to prefer John Tavares’ experience, ability to cover in the event of a centre injury and his chemistry with Mitch Marner over Huberdeau’s electricity.

I’m not bringing Rob Zamuner or Kris Draper to fill a role or anything, but my fourth-line definitely has the identity of the highest-end possible version of an energy line. Honestly, in some matchups, this trio may well end up being Hockey Canada’s matchup line ahead of the Crosby line, since it’s just a collection of the countries most willful two-way players.

I’m bringing Steven Stamkos and Couturier as extra forwards, basically two centremen — a lefty and a righty — which means snubbing Bo Horvat and Claude Giroux, my toughest omissions besides Huberdeau.

We weren’t asked to name coaches, but I should add that I’ve named Pete DeBoer and Jared Bednar as assistant coaches, partly because they’re deserving and partly so that my top-four can get reps together throughout the NHL season leading up to the 2022 Games.

There’s a factor in the international game that I still don’t think Hockey Canada has fully incorporated into their player selection process, but they really should: Puck-moving defenders are everything.

Which is why Samuel Girard — probably my most surprising selection — is a slam dunk no brainer for this team and is likely to play a prominent role. Thanks to Bednar’s colluding with me to win a gold medal, he’ll spend more time with Makar in the season leading up to the Olympics (although they’ve spent 200 5-on-5 minutes together the past two seasons, so they’re not exactly strangers). Same goes for Pietrangelo and Shea Theodore, who have played together a bit at 5-on-5 in the early going for Vegas (about 35 minutes so far), but will become the Golden Knight’s fixture top pair in 2021-22 for the purposes of Olympic preparation.

Doughty makes the team because he’s still performing at a high enough level that his status as the most important Hockey Canada veteran defender matters. And Morgan Rielly will be his partner on a mobile third pair, narrowly edging out Giordano.

Ryan Ellis is custom made for the international game and my Hockey Canada will have zero reservation bumping him up the lineup if injuries call for it.

In net, Price and Hart are coming to represent the past and the future while Jordan Binnington gets the nod to round out my trio of netminders. I’m comfortable enough with all three goaltenders that whoever is performing the best ahead of the tournament will go into the round-robin as my defacto starter. — Thomas Drance

Canada Womens

Picking a Canadian roster a year ahead of an Olympics is never easy.

And this time around, looking ahead to Beijing 2022, might be harder than ever, as the years since the 2018 Games have been unlike any other post-Olympic period for Team Canada.

First of all, Canada is coming off a silver medal finish at the last games in Pyeongchang — the first time that’s happened in two decades. If that wasn’t difficult enough, on the eve of the 2019 world championships, the Canadian Women’s Hockey League announced it would fold after nearly 12 years in operation, taking away most Canadians’ daily training environments. Canada ultimately lost in the semifinal of the tournament and took home a bronze medal, the first time Team Canada hasn’t won’t at least silver at a world championship. Then, the 2019 4 Nations Cup was cancelled due to contract disputes between the Swedish Ice Hockey Association and the Swedish women’s team.

On top of all of that, there have been further complications brought by a global pandemic, which led to the cancellation of the 2020 4 Nations Cup and the 2020 women’s world championships.

Essentially, the women’s hockey calendar through the first three years of the Olympic quad cycle has been almost entirely wiped out.

“This quad had been a huge challenge, not only for our program but certainly for women’s hockey globally,” said Gina Kingsbury, the manager of the senior women’s national team. “We’re sitting at Year 3 of our quad with a very little amount of critical experience that we were able to share across our athlete pool to be able to evaluate them and be able to prepare them for an Olympic Games.”

The last time Team Canada played at an international event was 660 days ago at the 2019 worlds. Since then, they’ve relied on games against the U.S. national team and mini-camps throughout the season hosted by Hockey Canada, but even those have been largely put on hold due to the pandemic.

Still, with all that being said, as part of The Athletic’s one year out from the Olympics package, we are going to try our best to project the 2022 Team Canada women’s Olympic roster.

Guided by 2018

To start, let’s take a brief comparative look at who played for Canada in 2018 and who would make the team today. Players selected for the 2022 team are highlighted in red.

FORWARDDEFENCEGOAL

Meghan AgostaRenata FastShannon Szabados

Bailey BramLaura FortinoAnn-Renée Desbiens

Emily ClarkBrigette LacquetteGeneviève Lacasse

Mélodie DaoustJocelyne Larocque

Haley IrwinMeaghan Mikkelson

Brianne JennerLauriane Rougeau

Rebecca Johnston

Sarah Nurse

Marie-Philip Poulin

Jill Saulnier

Natalie Spooner

Laura Stacey

Blayre Turnbull

Jennifer Wakefield

From 2018 to 2022, we’re projecting 15 returnees among the 23 roster spots. Nine up front, four on the blue line, and two in goal. It’s not a ton of turnover between the four years, but there are still several spots for younger players to break onto the senior national team and for others to make their Olympic debuts.

Now, let’s look at the projection.

How did I arrive at these names with so few evaluation opportunities?

Well, despite the cancellation, Hockey Canada still named its 23-player roster for the 2020 world championships.

And, in early January, 47 players were invited to a training camp at Hockey Canada’s home base in Calgary. Thirty-five athletes attended the two-week camp — players such as Rebecca Johnston and Sarah Nurse were invited but unable to attend — and were split into two teams for scrimmages, with the line rushes and defence pairings posted daily.

It’s not a huge sample size, but using the previous Olympic and World Championship rosters, and taking stock of the two-week camp, which ended on Friday, you can get a pretty good idea of where things stand one year out from Beijing 2022.

As mentioned above, this roster consists of 15 returnees from the 2018 Games. And 22 of the 23 players projected here were named to Canada’s roster for the cancelled 2020 Women’s World Championship. Brigette Lacquette is the only player on my roster who didn’t make the World Championship roster, as she was unable to play.

These lines and pairings certainly aren’t set in stone, but they were consistently used at last week’s camp, except for Nurse on the line with Emily Clark and Blayre Turnbull, as Nurse did not attend camp.

To start, there are some names on this roster that should be no-brainers.

Marie-Philip Poulin, 29, is now over a decade into her international career and is arguably the greatest player of all-time in the women’s game. She’s Canada’s captain and scored the game-winning goal in the gold medal games of her first two Olympic appearances (2010 and 2014). A knee injury kept her mostly out of the 2019 world championships, but she’s healthy now. And it would take something completely unforeseen for Poulin to not be in Beijing.

Her frequent winger for club (the now-defunct CWHL Les Canadiennes) and country, Mélodie Daoust, is also a natural choice. With three goals and seven points in five games, she led Canada in scoring at the last Olympics. And scored one of the most impressive shootout goals in the gold medal game.

Natalie Spooner and Brianne Jenner have been consistent staples for Team Canada in the last two Olympic Games, with Spooner making her World Championship debut in 2011, and Jenner in 2012. The duo ranked No. 1 and 2 in scoring for Canada at the 2019 world championships. Spooner scored six goals and 10 points in seven games, only one goal behind Hilary Knight, who led the tournament with 11 points. Jenner wasn’t far behind with nine points.

Lauriane Rougeau and Jocelyne Larocque are also steady veterans, albeit on the blue line, who have the 2014 and 2018 Olympics under their belts. While, Nurse and Clark, who played together at the University of Wisconsin, both made their Olympic debuts in 2018 and should be natural choices to return in 2022. Similarly, Fast made her debut in 2018 and has established herself as one of the top defenders in the women’s game.

Youth vs. experience

I wanted to strike a balance on this roster with returning players, veterans and young players, or those making their Olympic debut. Because according to Kingsbury, as much as you want to win a gold medal, you have to keep an eye to the future.

“Often you tend to lean on what you know, and the unknowns of the young players obviously is a little scary, but I do think we’re at a point in our program that we do have to sometimes take calculated risks,” she explained. “We’re aiming at winning a gold medal in Beijing, but we’re also making sure that we’ve got a sustainable success here down the road as well and that we’re looking ahead in the future of our program.”

With that front of mind, there are some obvious omissions on this projected roster.

Both Johnston and Laura Fortino, who played in 2018, were among the final cuts for the 2020 world championships. I left them off this roster.

Shannon Szabados was a steady presence in Canada’s crease from her Olympic debut in 2010 until 2019. She recently had her first child and is currently not playing. She could certainly decide to come back but will be 35 by the next games and 39 by 2026.

So, this feels like a natural time for a passing of the torch in the crease to younger goalies like Ann-Renée Desbiens, 26, and Emerance Maschmeyer, 26, who have been given a lot of the net over the last two and a half years, along with Geneviève Lacasse, 31.

Similarly, Meaghan Mikkelson, a three-time Olympian, was one of the most experienced players at last week’s camp, with just under 50 games for Canada at the Olympics (14) and world championships (35) over the last decade. She last played in 2017-18, taking a leave after the birth of her second child. This will be her second comeback to the national team.

This was one of the more difficult decisions for my projected blue line, and I assume this will be the same for the real decision-makers at Hockey Canada. Mikkelson will be 37 when the Games begin. If she can re-elevate her game, she can be a force on the ice. But could, say, Claire Thompson, 23, have a similar impact?

If we assume Rougeau, 30, and Larocque, 31, make this team, with two other returning blueliners in Fast and Lacquette, the Canadian blue line isn’t going to be inexperienced. So bringing Thompson to Beijing over Mikkelson could be one of those “looking ahead in the future” decisions.

There could be a similar decision in looking at a player like Erin Ambrose, who was the most difficult omission for me. Ambrose was one of the last cuts for the 2018 Olympics, but played her way onto the 2019 and 2020 World Championship rosters. She could realistically do the same for Beijing. But again, how much does Hockey Canada want to look forward to the future?

Admittedly, Ambrose, Mikkelson and even Meghan Agosta — a four-time Olympian who is a full-time Vancouver police officer who hasn’t play for Canada since 2017-18 — could be the ultimate wild cards for 2022. However, for this exercise, I decided that if I was undecided between a player on the way up and an older player, I erred on the side of the former.

This brings us to the Olympic rookies, projected to be: Jamie Lee Rattray, Victoria Bach, Sarah Fillier, Loren Gabel, Jaime Bourbonnais, Micah Zandee-Hart, and the aforementioned Maschmeyer and Thompson.

All eight of these rookies were named to the 2020 World Championship roster, and they were all featured in the 2019 world championships except for Bach and Fillier, who were among the final cuts. Rattray, 28,  has been in the Hockey Canada program for a while now and has seemed to solidify a place within the core group. Bach was set to make her international tournament debut at the world championships, and while that debut has been delayed, her standing on the team remains.

There are two young stars to watch for here, too, in Gabel and Fillier.

Gabel, 23, made her senior team debut at the 2018 4 Nations Cup and won the Patty Kazmaier Award — the biggest individual honour in women’s college hockey — in 2019 after scoring 40 goals and 69 points in 38 games, including 11 game-winning goals for Clarkson University. She graduated that year as the all-time leading scorer with 213 points on 116 goals and 97 assists through 160 games.

Fillier, 20, was nominated for the Patty Kazmaier as a rookie at Princeton in 2018-19 after she put up nearly two points per game (1.97) to lead NCAA women’s hockey. Fillier, a centre, also led her team in scoring (22 goals and 57 points in 29 games) and was named the National Rookie of the Year. Like Gabel, Fillier made her senior team debut at the 2018 4 Nations Cup.

These two have been on the rise and should certainly crack the 2021 World Championship and 2022 Olympics rosters.

Bourbonnais, Thompson and Zandee-Hart further make up the young up and coming core of Hockey Canada’s roster, specifically on the blue line.

As mentioned, all of the above players were named to the 2020 World Championship roster, which shows a lot of trust from the decision-makers to put them into best-on-best competition. The world championships is often a dress rehearsal for the Olympics, too. That they were all chosen over veterans like Johnston and Fortino means a lot.

Finally, there are some other young players in Hockey Canada’s talent pool to be highlighted here, such as Élizabeth Giguère, Emma Maltais and Daryl Watts.

Giguère won the Patty Kazmaier last season, while Watts currently leads the nation with 11 goals and 21 points through 10 games to start the NCAA season. There are some key complications impacting their Olympic chances.

None of the three were at the recent camp, a key evaluator for the 2021 world championships. Kingsbury said “it was impossible” to bring any U.S.-based athletes to camp due to COVID-19 travel restrictions. (Fillier decided to take the year off from Princeton with the questions around if Ivy League schools would have a season and the Olympic considerations in mind.)

“Having our college players not here is definitely another challenge,” she said. “You’re trying to scout online, and it’s hard to see what they do in college and try to figure out if that’s going to have an impact at the international level.”

So while they are talented, without camps and potentially cracking the 2021 World Championship roster, it will be hard to jump into the 2022 Olympics. Especially if they are trying to take spots from returning players such as Turnbull, Jill Saulnier and Laura Stacey, who have all shown they can be reliable forwards who can play up and down the lineup.

For everything laid out here, all it takes is a really good tournament or training camp by one or two players to change my entire roster. Every year before the Olympics, Hockey Canada invites its Olympic hopefuls to Calgary for a six-to-seven month “centralized” camp before the Games.

Typically, there are some surprises on the roster, as Kingsbury said some players come in “like sponges” and elevate their game.

Such is the difficulty in this exercise. Anything can happen once we officially get into the final year of the Olympic quad. But regardless, Canada is going to have a deep talent pool to chose from when it comes time for Beijing 2022.

USA Mens

I remember covering the 2010 United States Olympic men’s hockey team — that came within a Sidney Crosby overtime goal of winning a gold medal — and before the tournament wondering: How the hell are they going to fill out this roster?

Ten years later, there has been a seismic change in the hockey landscape at the highest levels in the United States. Depth is no longer an issue for the U.S.

We often joke Canada could enter two teams in these best-on-best tournaments and both would be gold-medal worthy. The U.S. is not so far behind that and it’s illustrated by the difficult decisions we’ve made with this lineup and the hard decisions that await whoever builds the 2022 version of Team USA. There will be no shortage of heated debate about those tabbed to wear the red, white and blue and, of course, those whose names do not end up on the 25-man roster.

In starting to narrow down our roster here, we hearkened back to that scrappy 2010 team built by Brian Burke and David Poile and coached by Ron Wilson and looked for clues as to how to build not just the most talented team but the team most likely to win gold. What was it that allowed that group to defy projections and push a superstar-laden Canadian team to overtime?

Conversely, what was it that led a talented American roster to fall short of a medal in Sochi four years later and to flame out spectacularly in the 2016 World Cup? You will hear over and over that this version of Team USA will be the most talented ever iced in a best-on-best tournament. Maybe. But we focused in this exercise on building not just the most talented American roster but a team that can overcome disappointment, obstacles and the unexpected en route to what would be the first American gold medal in men’s hockey since the Miracle on Ice in 1980.

Let the shame-talking begin. Yes. No room on this roster for Johnny Gaudreau, Zach Parise or Paul Stastny. No room for 2019 first overall pick Jack Hughes. Sorry.

This is as good a team down the middle as any Team USA has iced, starting with Auston Matthews and Jack Eichel. A little bit of everything from this group of centers including solid leadership, ability to play shutdown hockey and, of course, create offense. That meant excluding worthy pivots like Kevin Hayes and Hughes even though one former coach and executive we spoke to felt Hughes would continue to evolve and push his way onto the roster before the end of 2021.

As for the wingers, there is so much to like from this group including the size and speed of Blake Wheeler, Jake Guentzel and Anders Lee and the offensive creativity of J.T. Miller and Kyle Connor. And of course, who will every team in the tournament love to hate from the word go? Matthew Tkachuk.

We kept Stanley Cup champion and Olympic shootout hero T.J. Oshie (T.J. Sochi as he is known after his exploits in 2014) given his experience. If you wanted more speed on the right side, you could go with Bryan Rust and/or one of our favorite emerging players, Conor Garland. We love the natural connection between usual Winnipeg linemates Connor and Wheeler and we wanted Stanley Cup champion Blake Coleman on this roster for his versatility and his ability to play both ends of the ice.

At one point, we had Gaudreau as one of our extra forwards in place of Max Pacioretty but the experts we spoke to felt Pacioretty needed to be on the roster and the fact that Gaudreau has struggled to produce in the playoffs we went with Pacioretty. Both the coach and former player we spoke to suggested two Brocks, Nelson and Boeser, and Columbus captain Nick Foligno should be considered. Another dark horse forward in the former player’s view is Alex Iafallo.

There will be no more critical decisions for Team USA’s management team than the ones made on the blue line.

The Beijing Games will be played on North American-sized ice so it will be critical to include not only those defenders who can skate fluidly and make good, quick decisions with the puck but who can defend vigorously. Team USA’s entry in the World Cup in 2016 is a good illustration of why you should never build a team with the notion of facing one particular opponent. But given Canada is in the same round-robin pool as the U.S., the ability to defend a physical, skilled team like Canada will be paramount.

As in all things, the balance will be crucial. This group is split evenly right shot/left shot and does have a good mix of youthful zest and solid experience. Some may quibble with leaving a guy like Zach Werenski off the roster, especially given his familiarity with Seth Jones. Fair enough. But a number of NHL sources we spoke to felt Torey Krug needed to be on this team.

Jeff Petry has established himself as one of the most effective defensemen in the game excelling in all situations and playing more often than not against opposing teams’ top talent. Jaccob Slavin, who is the motor that drives the talented Carolina blue line, must be on this roster. Charlie McAvoy has emerged from the shadows of Zdeno Chara to become the Bruins’ undisputed number one defender and he will be a key part of this blue line.

So having to leave Werenski off the list of eight is difficult but a function of the breadth and depth of options that will be available. Others who were on the radar included young John Marino, who has been so impressive in Pittsburgh, and the venerable Ryan Suter, who is a perennial participant in these best-on-best tournaments.

Goaltending is probably the most clearly established position for Team USA. Connor Hellebuyck is the defending Vezina Trophy winner. He’s an elite netminder who has endured his own share of ups and downs en route to his current lofty status.

John Gibson, playing behind a rebuilding Ducks team, won’t have the gaudy numbers that other top NHL netminders boast but he is recognized around the hockey world as an elite netminder and he will push Hellebuyck for the starter’s role in Beijing.

Ben Bishop’s lingering health issues excuse him from our list but if the multiple time Vezina Trophy finalist went on a roll later this season or to start the 2021-22 season he could play his way into the picture. Two-time Stanley Cup winner Jonathan Quick is Hall of Fame worthy but past his prime so we went younger with Thatcher Demko, who was stellar in the bubble playoffs for Vancouver.

We’ll admit one former NHL coach and executive with whom we shared our roster felt unequivocally Bishop should be on the team ahead of Demko. And one longtime netminder and analyst felt that the Kings’ Cal Petersen in Los Angeles might actually jump over Gibson by the time the Olympics roll around. — Scott Burnside

Let’s start with the fourth line. I was chatting with Blackhawks director of amateur scouting Mark Kelley for another story on the way about Team USA and he suggested this one. We were debating the merits of Jack Hughes on the Olympic team and he said, if he were to do it, he’d throw him out there with the two Tkachuks.

“No one will get near him,” Kelley said of Hughes. “It’ll be like he’s walking his two pit bulls.”

To pull it off, we’re probably costing a guy like Jake Guentzel a deserving spot, but it’s fun. I like the idea of T.J. Oshie as an option for shootouts but just couldn’t squeeze him in. I’d also like to find a spot for Joe Pavelski, who is averaging like three goals per game this season, but am skewing younger because we’re a year out. This team is loaded.

Quinn Hughes has gone from a guy knocking on the door to make the roster to the top pair over the last year. Just think of how good he’ll be a year from now. Zach Werenski could be penciled in to play in the place of Ryan Suter but it would be great to have Suter’s Olympic experience available in the top six. It’s also possible we’re suffering from some recency bias following Werenski’s slow start. Adam Fox, Neal Pionk and Matt Grzelcyk all have to be on a watch list this season.

The debate in goal will be about who starts between Gibson and Hellebuyck but the most interesting slot might be No. 3. Chances are, that goalie isn’t playing, so I’m bringing the future of American goaltending — world junior gold medalist Spencer Knight — to get experience on the big stage and soak in the experience much like a young Jonathan Quick did in 2010. — Craig Custance

Team USA is due in best-on-best hockey.

They lost the bronze medal game at the Sochi Olympics in 2014. They were embarrassed at the 2016 World Cup.

Now they’ve got a whole new generation of stars ready to bring USA Hockey back to gold-medal contention.

The difficulty in this exercise of selecting the roster for the Beijing Olympics is proof of how things got to another level for USA Hockey over the past decade.

It’s probably a crime to leave off T.J. Sochi but there’s plenty of time for me to change my mind before next year. Anders Lee, Jake Guentzel, Blake Coleman, Bryan Rust, Chris Kreider and James van Riemsdyk are among other names I passed over for now. It speaks to the elite U.S. depth. I’m probably one of the few who has young Brady Tkachuk on this roster this far out but, believe me, when we get closer to the final roster picks next December/January, he will have worked his way on to a lot of people’s lists.

I may also be one of the few to select Kevin Hayes but I wanted the extra center on the roster and given the fact the tournament will be played on North American-sized ice, I like his big body as a factor.

Four lefties and four righties, talk about balance in this defense group. I do worry I put too much offense on here but I’ve got my penalty-killing units in Slavin-Jones and McDonagh-Petry. Obviously, it’s tough to leave off a quality veteran like Suter and no doubt USA Hockey may not. Zach Werenski and Cam Fowler are other names to monitor over the year. But I really like the balance in those eight I put down.

Not much to debate in goal as Hellebuyck-Gibson is pretty much locked in at this point as the 1-2 punch. Now, I went with youth as the No. 3 with Demko but obviously, a healthy Ben Bishop or a resurgent Jonathan Quick would force USA Hockey’s hand. — Pierre LeBrun

USA Womens

It’s been nearly three years since USA Hockey forward Jocelyne Lamoureux-Davidson unleashed her gold-medal winning shootout goal at the 2018 Winter Olympics. The “Oops I Did it Again“ move shook Canadian netminder Shannon Szabados right out of her pads and sent the United States back home with their first goal medal since 1998.

Much has changed in the women’s hockey landscape since the national team was paraded around the United States media circuit. From “Ellen” to “The Tonight Show” to some players visiting the White House, we seemed on track to see the best leadup to the next Olympics ever.

However, the U.S. women’s team hasn’t competed in an official tournament since the April 2019 women’s worlds in Finland and has had very few competitive games since. It’s been a rocky road that has been only further complicated by the pandemic. The last official roster we got from USA Hockey was ahead of the cancelled 2020 world championships.

The 2022 Winter Olympics are officially one year away and soon we can expect USA Hockey to name a roster for the 2021 worlds and enter residency in the fall ahead of selecting the roster for the Beijing Games. Here is a look at all that has happened since the Pyeongchang Games and what we predict the final U.S. Olympic roster will look like.

The rundown

The Canadian Women’s Hockey League folded as Team USA traveled to Finland for the 2019 world championship — their last official tournament. New head coach Bob Corkum made some noticeable roster adjustments for that tournament, including bringing back the final cuts from the 2018 Olympic roster: Alex Carpenter and Megan Bozek. Kelly Pannek, Annie Pankowski and the return of 2014 Olympian Michelle Picard were other notable additions.

As Team USA was competing on the ice, they were also paving a future for professional women’s sports off the ice. Players made a bold statement with the #ForTheGame movement, vowing not to play for an existing professional league in North America. That was a loud and clear message to then-NWHL commissioner Dani Rylan. The movement has since evolved into the Professional Women’s Hockey Players Association and the #DreamGap tour.

Games were already sparse when the Swedish national team held its own boycott for better conditions. Unlike what unfolded after the U.S. held out of the 2017 worlds, Sweden and its players did not reach an agreement and the 4 Nations Cup was canceled.

In lieu of 4 Nations, USA Hockey and Hockey Canada held a joint training camp in Pennsylvania. Canada opted for a young roster for the training camp, while the U.S. went with the usual suspects.

The next scheduled official tournament was the 2020 worlds. However, the pandemic shut that down and we haven’t seen USA Hockey in competition since. COVID-19 also greatly affected the PWHPA’s second year. Some players hit the ice last month in Tampa, but the organization has not yet been able to activate all of its five hub cities.

The 2020 world championship roster was announced and likely gives us the best glimpse at what USA Hockey will roll with as we approach the one year mark from the 2022 Olympics.

2020 world championship rosterFORWARDSDEFENDERSGOALIES

Brianna DeckerLee SteckleinAlex Cavallini

Hannah BrandtCayla BarnesMaddie Rooney

Hayley ScamurraMegan KellerAerin Frankel

Hilary KnightEmily Matheson

Kelly PannekMegan Bozek

Dani CameranesiKacey Bellamy

Kendall Coyne-SchofieldSavannah Harmon

Amanda Kessel

Jesse Compher

Alex Carpenter

Britta Curl

Grace Zumwinkle

Abby Roque

Roster changes

Notably missing from this roster compared to the 2018 Olympic team are Meghan Duggan, Jocelyne Lamoureux-Davidson, and Monique Lamoureaux-Morando. Duggan has since retired and it is unclear if USA Hockey is permanently moving on from the Lamoureux twins, who both returned to the team in November 2019 after each giving birth to their first child.

Defender Emily Matheson has announced she is expecting a baby boy in June 2021. Shelly Picard, who returned for the 2019 worlds, has also effectively retired and now serves as the deputy commissioner of the NWHL.

In goal, it would appear Nicole Hensley is on the outside looking in. Katie Burt and Aerin Frankel might be the two netminders Corkum brings in to join Maddie Rooney and Alex Cavallini. Overall, Corkum has shown he isn’t afraid to mix in some new faces with those synonymous with USA Hockey, such as Hilary Knight, Kacey Bellamy and new captain Kendall Coyne Schofield.

Annie Pankowski had a great world championship in 2019 but did not land on the 2020 roster. She was also missing from the 53-player roster tapped for an evaluation camp in October 2020, while younger players like Jincy Dunne, Natalie Snodgrass and Britta Curl were present.

Corkum emphasized in October the importance of bringing in new players and facilitating internal competition.

“We have a nice blend of youth and veteran talent here and the young players are certainly pushing the older players. And the older players aren’t ready to give it up,” Corkum said in a USA Hockey video recap.

Predictions

It is always difficult to make Olympic predictions, especially when USA Hockey hasn’t hit the ice in so long. I get the impression, though, that Corkum and USA Hockey are ready to shake things up. The roster for the 2021 worlds won’t be a complete youth movement, but it will feature some rising stars who have proven themselves in the 2019-20 Rivalry Series and in the NCAA. Here is my best guess at the 2022 Olympic Roster:

The 2020 world championship roster is the best indicator we have right now and I think we’ll see that team begin to take form as the go-to roster. I came up with line pairings based on the 2018 Olympics, 2019 worlds, and the 2019-20 Rivalry Series.

Alex Carpenter and Megan Bozek should make the next Olympics, though I’m more confident in Bozek than Carpenter.

Both are extremely skilled and are two of the few players currently getting in competitive games overseas. That said, there are a lot of good, young forwards coming up in the USA Hockey system. Abby Roque and Jesse Compher, for example, showed they are ready to play with Olympians in the 2019-20 Rivalry Series.

Roque, the 2020 Bob Allen USA Hockey Player of the Year, is an elite center and all signs point to her having a stellar international career. She scored two impressive goals in the Rivalry Series and injected some much-needed energy into USA Hockey coming off the lackluster performance at the 2019 November camp.

Last year would have marked the second consecutive world championship for Boston University product Jesse Compher. An injury kept her away from the Rivalry Series, but expect her to be back in the rotation. She has a great combination of size and skill for a USA Hockey team that is equal parts fast and furious on the ice.

Making the USA Hockey roster as a defender is tough, but ultimately, I think Matheson will need more time to return. I predict Savannah Harmon and Jincy Dunne will be the two vying for a spot this year, while Matheson will go for hers in 2022. I give the edge to the youth.

In net, Cavanelli and Rooney seem to be the mainstays for Corkum. Hensley attended the October evaluation camp, while Katie Burt did not. Frankel making the worlds roster indicates to me that she is being prepared for international competition.

As a journalist very fond of the eye test, this exercise was difficult, but here is to hoping we get to see players hit the ice for the red, white, and blue sooner rather than later.

[theethicalgirl]

Top 5 moments/experiences that changed your life.

Go get your coffee mug (I know you don’t like tea!), this is going to be a long answer.

1. When I was 11, I was staying at a farm with my parents for the weekend (I’ve always loved animals, so a weekend surrounded with animals and nature was a dream!) While our parents were resting, me and my brother went outside to explore. After wandering for a while, we saw a field full of lambs. They were so cute and I really wanted to pet them. So one of the farmers went to get one of them and I got so excited. I thought he was bringing the lamb to us so me and my brother could play with them. I bet by now you know where this is going…The farmer grabbed a knife and slit that baby’s throat right in front of me. I remember standing there, in shock, watching the lamb dying. I watched as they struggled, and as their movements got slower, and I watched the fear and the pain in their eyes. I remember we were in some sort of a hill, and so the blood flowed down like a dark red river. I was horrified, and those images stuck with me forever. I cried the whole weekend and, it was at that moment that I realized that eating meat is wrong.Now, I wouldn’t go vegetarian right away. In fact, it took me a few years until I finally decided to cut meat from my life for good. But still, in that moment, everything changed for me. It was horrible, but I’m glad I had that experience - otherwise I probably would never have faced the consequences of our food choices. If I hadn’t watched that baby die, I wouldn’t be the same person as I am today.

2. In 2014, I, Carolina, started college (!). It was a wild ride and it would change me forever, for the better and for the worse (and by worse I mean, I probably wouldn’t be such a mess if college hadn’t slaughtered my mental health :) ). We both met at that very first day, and I’ve told you several times how much of an impact you had on me. It was incredible meeting someone that actually understood why ethics were important enough for me to change my lifestyle! It was such a relief to be able to talk to someone who got it, and eventually, we taught each other. I would have never thought about where our clothes come from if it wasn’t for you, and that lead me to discover so many other important things about the world… I am a better person because of you. I don’t think there is anyone in this world that understands me like you do, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life. Thank you.

3. When I went vegan, I started watching a LOT of youtube. I stumbled upon a channel called A Privileged Vegan, and it changed my life. Up until then, I was only a vegan girl that cared about ethical fashion. A Privileged Vegan’s videos connected the dots. I already considered myself a feminist, but she introduced me to social justice and to intersectionality, she made me realize just how privileged I am and why it’s important that I take that into consideration in my activism. She taught me why capitalism in inherently unethical, and about how veganism is not just a lifestyle - it’s a political stance. Later, her podcast with Mexie, The Vegan Vanguard, would get me thinking more about anarchy, revolution and other fun stuff…!

4. A few years ago, I went dolphin watching for the first time. It was very emotional for me to watch such beautiful, intelligent animals how they’re supposed to be: In their natural habitats; Free. I had been vegan for a couple of years, and I never doubted it - I knew it was the right choice from the start. But I never felt so at peace until that moment. I really can’t describe the emotional connection I felt, not only with them and nature itself, but mostly with my actions and my values. At that moment I remember thinking “This is why I’m vegan. And I’m so glad I am”.

5. In October 2018, I learned that there were vegan activism groups in Lisbon. I spent years being the only vegan I knew, and I really wanted to make vegan friends, but street activism was scary for me. I didn’t want to be that stereotypical angry vegan screaming at people passing by, shaming them for their actions (and making them think all vegans are crazy!) So I reached out to the activism groups, very reluctantly. The first one I reached was The Save Movement, and they had a vigil just a few days from then.

So I was like, you know what, I’m going!

The vigil was at night. I didn’t have a car to go to the slaughterhouse, so I had to get a ride from a stranger. And the activist I was talking to through the Lisbon Animal Save page - well, at some point I realized he was an older man. For some reason, I had assumed I was talking to a girl, so realizing he was a man was scary. I’m a girl in my early twenties, and I want to trust my fellow vegans but there are so many dangerous people out there…So I asked “Are there going to be other girls in the car?”. I was so scared asking this question, thinking maybe it was rude - and I think most women will understand this fear. Because even though the world is so dangerous to us, some men still get offended when we don’t immediately trust them.I asked anyway, and I’m so glad I did. The man immediately called me, super understanding, and he said yes, there were going to be other girls in the car, and in fact the person who would be driving would be a girl close to my age, and he didn’t judge me for my distrust, quite the opposite. He totally got it. Honestly, his attitude was so comforting, and made me feel safe. We are often so scared to offend the “nice guys” by not trusting them, but if a guy doesn’t understand how dangerous it is for us and why we need to be careful, then he doesn’t deserve our trust anyway. So, I went to the vigil, and even though it’s such a heavy setting (it was a slaughterhouse after all), meeting other like minded people was so heartwarming. I started going to other events with other kinds of activism, and now I’ve been an activist for over a year and it changed my life. It taught me so much about myself, and brought so many wonderful people to my life and so many happy moments. I had a lot of deep, meaningful conversations, and also light, dumb and insanely fun ones in which I laughed like I hadn’t laughed in a long time. So yes, I’m really glad I went to that very first vigil!

If you read all of this, wow! I wish I had a prize for you. Thank you so much for caring. And thank you @we-pay-for-everything for the ask and for being such an incredible person and I love you very much! 🌺

[purplesurveys]

1051

Are you between the ages of 30 & 40? I still have to get through nearly another decade to get to that decade.

What was your favorite Saturday morning cartoon growing up? My favorites were The Wild Thornberrys and Little Bill, both on Nickelodeon. My sister and I also enjoyed this wacky show called The Upside Down Show but it wasn’t a cartoon.

What was your favorite toy as a child? I liked any toy that had a lot of buttons or features within it - dollhouses, kitchen sets, cash registers, toy phones, anything that could make me test how much it could do.

In High School did you wear acid washed jeans? No. It’s not a style I would be drawn to, then and now.

How much was a gallon of gasoline when you first started driving? I don’t know; I never paid much attention to gas prices, honestly.

What was your first car? It’s a 2014 (or 2015?) Mitsubishi Mirage I’m still using today, though it was my dad who paid for it and he’s the one who takes it out for oil changes and stuff.

Who taught you how to drive? My dad taught me a few times around the neighborhood, but he also enrolled me for like three classes in a driving school so that I got to learn how to drive in a highway.

What was your high school mascot? Both of my schools didn’t have any. My university does have a nickname for our varsity teams, but we’re simply just ‘Maroons’ and not an animal like what I usually see.

Did you go to your Senior Prom? We had a junior prom, nothing for senior year. I was invited to go to the senior ball in another school by Mike, though. That feels like ages ago; everything is so different now.

What did you do after graduation? After my high school graduation I went straight to college like most kids here. After graduating college, I immediately started looking for jobs; I landed an internship after a month and got absorbed into the company two months after.

What was your first job? I’m currently working as an associate at a public relations agency. This is my first job and for now, I’m content in staying in this career. This is where I set out to be when I was in college and I don’t feel the need to change paths any time soon.

What did you want to be when you grew up? I wanted to be an astronaut more than anything else, but I remember also wanting to be a firefighter or a vet.

Any posters on your bedroom walls growing up? I had a handful of wrestling posters that my mom was never a fan of. It was never her business since it’s my room, but she always made it the case.

Do you remember the first time you drank a beer? It may have been at Marielle’s debut, five Julys ago. She served beer at the afterparty of her 18th birthday party, and I think I had taken my first sip then.

Did you ever try cigarettes? Yeah, I started this year actually. I’m about to reach my first anniversary of trying my first cigarette :/ I don’t have a lot of them though and I haven’t smoked since like February or March, I think.

How did you spend your summers growing up? At home. My parents were always busy with work, so I had no choice but to myself occupied at home. Luckily I had siblings and cousins, so we were always playing with each other. My summers were never productive until I was in college, when I started making the effort to go out more.

If you could change anything from your teenage years, would you? Ahh idk man I wish I wouldn’t have spent as much time by the computer as I did, and maybe hang out with friends or something instead. < Yeah this hits the bullseye pretty much. I was a very introverted teenager. Not to mention the internet and social media started to blow up during my tween/early teenage years, so I was hooked to my laptop and kept people away as a result. I didn’t start feeling like a teenager until I was 16, when I gained friends and got invited to more stuff.

Do you remember your first time? Yeah, it was during one of my 18th birthday celebrations and she was around.

Ever look back and wish some things were still the same? I do it a lot these days. I do try to stop, because I don’t know what I can gain out of doing so anymore, and because there’s always the danger of being left behind from looking back too much; but most days I can’t help it.

After high school - straight to college or straight to work? University, because you kinda need that credential where I live. It’s unfair, but it’s our reality.

How much did you make per hour at your first job? We don’t really calculate that here...I’ll try to do math for y’all lmao aka Google it, which says I make $2.34 an hour. Wow when you put it that way, it really does not sound high :/ I’m honestly okay with my pay though. I live with my parents so I contribute to the bills and stuff now, but even then there’s more than enough left for me. Favorite home-cooked meal growing up? My grandma’s kare-kare. It was/is always reserved for special occasions; and out of all her grandchildren I was also the one who got attached to the dish especially as I got older, so eventually kare-kare also became the family’s ‘Robyn is coming over so we better prepare this’ dish. I think I’m her only grandchild that she has an allotted dish for, so that makes me feel special :)

Favorite place to eat out growing up? The local Burger King, back when it had a play place for kids. 

Did your parents live in a different country before you were born?: No, they have always lived in the Philippines. My mom has always wanted to migrate but my dad shoots it down every time.

Do you have a preferred coffee brand?: When it comes to coffee, no. I wanna try out everything. But when it comes to coffee shop ambience, Starbucks all the way.

Have you ever dated someone who was terrible with money?: No. I remember Gab as always being very cautious, responsible, and conscious about money. Her parents sustained her debit card and I’m pretty sure they always gave her a little bit extra, but she never took more than her weekly allowance from the ATM.

If so, how did it affect the relationship?: Money was never an issue, mostly because the money we received during the course of our relationship wasn’t even ours lol; we both received set allowances from our parents. If one of us was running out of cash, we never hesitated to cover for each other first, and we never pressured one another to pay back immediately.

How often do you paint your nails?: Never. 

Do you know anyone who's related to a current or former world leader?: Yeah, I went to high school with a relative of Duterte. She’s super secretive about it, which is pretty understandable. I’m friends with/went to classes with people who are grandchildren of senators and other politicians as well.

Do you do your own taxes, or do you hire a professional?: ...I have no idea how to do that...I always just assumed it’s already taken care of when a part of my salary is deducted lol. I may have to ask my parents about this, whoops.

What is something you don't have any natural talent for?: Anything to do with music. Reading it, playing it, singing, writing songs, etc. Also art and anything to do with creativity.

Did you watch this year's Eurovision?: Ah, my favorite time of the year to mute all my overseas mutuals on Twitter at one point lmao. No, I never caugtht up with it.

Have there been any periods in your life that could be described as being chaotic?: Senior year was a big chaotic war zone. The death of my grandpa and my first breakup coincided with all the crucial college entrance exams. Speaking of college, it was also a period of a lot of heavy decision-making due to me having to make choices of what course I wanted to take in every school I applied to. I barely cried during those few months and it still shocks me to this day how I did it. That was the most I’ve been on autopilot.

What is something you frequently forget?: Where I place my car keys and/or glasses last.

If I looked in your fridge right now, what would I find?: Bread, eggs, a bunch of condiments, butter cheese, vegetables, leftovers, and the grazing box I received from my workplace yesterday. I’m sure there’s more, but I haven’t really stopped and stared at our fridge for a while now.

How do you feel about your body?: I used to feel fairly confident about it; like it was never an issue with me. But truthfully, after being dumped, I’ve started to feel insecure over everything about me.

Who is someone you would like to get to know better?: My teammates at work, Bea and Ysa. They both seem like cool and funny people both in and out of work, and I’d love to get to hang out with them.

If you had to move to a new city, where would you move?: Idk, just somewhere with a lot of opportunities to try new things and meet new people.

Have you ever traveled on a double-decker train?: Nope. I’ve never been on anything double-decker, if I remember correctly.

What's your opinion on assisted suicide?: [trigger warning] I’ve looked into it, but it’s a dead end where I live. That’s all I’ll say, as I don’t want to give others ideas.

At what point do you consider a relationship to be 'long-term?': Fuck if I know anymore. We reached six years and it was a point where I was comfortable and didn’t feel the need to doubt anymore; everything turned out to be a lie in the end. I don’t know anymore. I don’t think about these things anymore.

What jobs did your parents have when you were growing up?: My dad has always been a chef, so he went through all the ranks throughout my childhood until he finally got an executive position when I was in high school. I remember my mom being a receptionist.

Do they still have these jobs? Or different jobs? Or have they retired?: My dad is still in that career path but he doesn’t cook in the kitchen anymore, or at least as much as he used to. He does all the menu planning, evaluating, etc. My mom has shifted to becoming an executive secretary, but she’s still in the hotel industry.

Do you own any winter sports equipment?: I don’t. There’s no reason for me to have any.

Do you have a cell contract plan, or are you on a pre-paid plan?: Prepaid.

Would your parents be okay with you dating someone of another race? I can definitely see my mom reacting, but I know she knows I won’t let her get away with saying anything mildly offensive. My dad would just go on with his life and will care more about the fact that I’m seeing someone, lol.

Do you like when friends stop by unexpectedly? No. Schedule it ahead and let me know. I’m not always mentally okay and them showing up as a surprise might just make me more stressed than grateful.

Where are the following people and what are they doing: mom, dad, sibling(s), best friend, significant other, ex, and last person you kissed? My entire family is under the same roof in their bedrooms, either sleeping or having just woken up. Angela is in Parañaque, probably at a cousin’s place; no significant other; I have no idea where my ex, and also the last person I kissed, is. She doesn’t really have anything to do with me anymore.

How strong are your feelings for the last person you kissed? They’re there. I’d still take a bullet for them if it comes down to it, the usual shit. Let’s move on.

What was the last thing someone else bought for you? My workplace gave me a grazing box as the company Christmas gift.

If your parents looked in your purse/book bag would they find anything you don’t want them to see? What about your bedroom? Do you have anything hidden in there? My vape pens. I came home from Starbucks last weekend and my mom thought my breath smelled like cigarettes and she almost got super pissed until I was able to convince her the only thing I put in my mouth was coffee, so I know my 22 year old, employed, self-earning ass would for sure still get in trouble if I was discovered to be vaping.

How close are you to the last person you hung out with? Can you be your complete self around them? It was the first time I met them and they are also my bosses, so I can’t exactly be my complete self around them yet. I had to act super reserved and to essentially make a good impression first before I start whipping out my jokes or whatever.

If you decided to call your ex right now, do you think he/she would answer? How would the conversation go? No, she’d reject it and tell me to text instead. If she was feeling snappy she would also tell me I’m no longer in the place to contact her that way. Sigh. Who is she anymore and why is she so different from the person I was with?

Are you attracted to the last person you exchanged numbers with? No.

Is music a daily part of your life? It’s not. Videos, more like.

Yellow nail polish: yes or no? Bright or neon yellow is a no, but I suppose more muted shades like mustard yellow can work for me.

What do you think of country music? Eh, not a fan. I would skip it in a second, and I never think about it.

Have you ever ended a relationship but wish you could’ve kept it a little longer? I’ve never ended a relationship.

Did you go to your high school’s graduation? Yes...that’s not an event I would’ve wanted to miss out on lol. That was a nice day. My grandparents came to watch me, and we had dinner at a revolving restaurant after.

If you could live the last three months over again, is there anything you’d change? Everything went to shit exactly three months ago, so this hits home very hard for me. Yes, I would change a lot of things for life not to have gone the way it has.

Who was the last person to message you on Facebook? What would you do if that person told you they have feelings for you? My mom. I would be creeped out and tell my dad immediately.

How did you feel when you woke up today? Melancholic.

Who was the first person you talked to today? What did you talk about? I haven’t talked to anyone yet today. I was thinking of replying to Aliyah’s comment on my Facebook post, but in the end I didn’t think a response was necessary.

When you apply your make-up, do you do it in a specific order? I don’t wear makeup.

Did you do anything sexual last night? No.

Do you think the last person you Facebook messaged is a virgin? She has three children, me included.

Did any of your friends lose their virginity before they were 16? If so, did you feel pressured to do the same? I don’t think my friends did, but I probably know other people who did. My baby asexual ass definitely didn’t feel the pressure. I was even scared shitless for my first kiss when it came time for it and I had kept putting it off that night.

Has someone of the opposite sex made you smile today? No.

Does it matter to you if your significant other smokes? With my previous relationship, it did in the beginning; eventually I just stopped caring.

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? I think it may have been Andrew.

Do you like where you are in life right now? No. I don’t know if a new year would make it better, or if it would help give me a healthier mindset. I just have to wait and see.

Do you hate it when there is a fly around you? Very much.

Is your mom overbearing? She can be.

Is there snow where you live? Never.