#why are we always on the same wavelength when it comes to this pathetic lil guy lmao

[chichirichick]

SoMa Week Day 4: Apologize

I did it!!!! Day 4 is up and running! And just a warning (that any fandom person probably already knows), obviously an apology between Soul and Maka doesn't go easily... Check it out on ff.net, ao3, or after the cut!

Maka had spent their morning classes as storm clouds on the horizon- grey and black with impending doom, threatening thunder and lightning just from the look of them. Soul was working double-time to maintain the cool guy exterior but internally, it was a bit of a shit-show. Nothing-- repeat, nothing-- fruitful had come from his analysis of breakfast which was when he first noticed the potential monsoon coming his way as Maka spent more time stirring her cereal than eating it.

Did I leave my towel on the floor again?

Nope.

Was it my turn to empty the dishwasher?

He checked Maka's annoyance-inducing chore chart and found it was not.

Did I somehow sleepwalk last night and go on some tirade that now means I can never be forgiven?

Welp, anything at this point was a possibility since no matter how much Soul searched his mind, there was no answer to the category-5 that was Maka Albarn today.

So, our master of strategy, the man-- boy no longer fit here, or at least he hoped so-- who always tried to balance his meister's ability to jump headfirst into any problem without a lick of thought first, planned to hide.

Technically, it had worked too. Maybe a little too well as Soul then started to have rainclouds of his own to pull around. I miss her. Yes, he was such a pathetic sap that an afternoon without Ms. Sunshine herself to bust through his own grumpiness left him sore. Heart sore. Soul sore. Since now it felt like if they weren't wrapped together, if her soul wasn't pieced in perfect with his, something was missing. What a pathetic sap.

That was definitely the resounding conclusion in his head especially after the two of them passed the evening in separate spaces. With the sun down and both his body and soul tired, Soul's mind kept him awake, preoccupied with creating the perfect apology. All the years with her were an absolute help in the construction of such a thing since he had to be exceptionally sorry for the myriad of idiot things he'd done over their time together. One might even go so far as to say that he was actually talented at their creation, since, thankfully, there had yet to be a moment where one had not won him Maka's forgiveness.

Who knows, though, today could be the day!

Soul pressed a painful groan into his pillow as he began the chore of suffocating in the fabric and making a detailed plea for her forgiveness.

It was then that this door opened without an announcement or a knock.

He rolled over, trying not to gulp for air even though his lungs were screaming for it since Maka was standing in the doorway, arms crossed tightly against her chest.

"Hey?" That wasn't meant to be a question but between his voice cracking and the panic, his octave had wavered enough to make it one.

"I'm sorry!" It was just as much an accusation as an apology.

Soul stared wide-eyed.

"I know you've been avoiding me all day-"

Soul raised his eyebrows and managed a "wha-?"

"All morning you were just doing that stare-and-think, so I know you were upset and I just couldn't- I still can't figure out what I did, and I don't know what else to say other than I'm sorry even though I know that doesn't make it any better!" The words were scrambling for supremacy, all of them almost blurring together at the end as a few tears ran loose down her cheeks.

He sat up the rest of the way, watching as his movement made her flinch, made her consider running, but that didn't discourage the rest. Soul stood, ready to sprint if she did, but Maka simply teetered foot to foot in her discomfort. Once he was close enough, he reached for her, getting a handle on one of her elbows to keep her in place. "Whaddya think you did?"

"I don't know," she pressed back.

"If you think you did somethin' wrong you prolly have a guess." His other hand grasped her other arm, getting her to fumble a step closer. "Don't think you'd apologize unless you think you actually did somethin'."

She huffed. "I-" There was that sway again and her eyes trailed away to the floor. "I've been ignoring you."

Soul sighed. "You think so?"

"I know so," Maka warbled tearfully. "I just- I-" She pulled one elbow out of his grasp so she could use her hand to clear away the tears, breaking her hard stance just as her resolve started to falter. "Soul, I don't know how to tell you, and I'm sorry."

"Though we always knew how to talk to each other." Soul couldn't stop the stutter of his own voice, but even without a second breath he continued, "Friends- partners do that."

With each one of those monikers, her wavelength pulsed.

"You don't think we're that?" he offered shakily.

"We are, but-" Another desperate fractured cry sparked between them.

Soul tightened his grip on her. "There ain't a but, Maka. I'm your friend. I'm your partner. If there's something else, it ain't a but." He heaved another sigh, his fingers trembling as he weakly shook their connection. "I thought you were mad at me, but that ain't it, huh? There's somethin'... somethin' wrong. Maybe has been for a lil' while. Makes me scared that there's somethin' else. So don't tell me there's a but, Maka, please."

She felt the fear explode from him, the tightly positioned mask slipping and letting that inky darkness that he always held at bay leak between them. "I'm sorry," she murmured again as she searched his face.

"Please, stop sayin' that," he pleaded back as another sickly wave of fear lapped between them.

"No, I'm sorry, I forgot…" Maka let her voice drift off as her hand lifted with a purpose, pressing firmly to his chest. The echo was clear, that moment that she'd promised in her heart to be braver, to make sure she never let him get hurt for her sake again. This time, she could look him in the eyes; this time she could make him a better promise. "There is a but- and it was only because I was afraid, except I can't let my fear hurt you. Which means…" She swallowed all of it- the terror, any bit of pride- and jumped like she always did. "I'm your friend, I'm your partner, but I'm also not going to ignore that I have feelings beyond that. I… was avoiding you because I was avoiding them. Looking at you, being with you, just makes me want more and I'm terrified that you don't want the same thing or that it hurts you. I can't really decide which would be worse."

While Soul's eyebrows were furrowed in thought, his soul was playing out a completely different song. "Then I gotta apologize."

For all her courage, Maka couldn't utter another word, just staring at his searching eyes and trying to decipher why his internal melody sounded so beautiful at that moment.

"'Cause I thought I was makin' it pretty obvious." His lean was slow, easing forward until their foreheads touched. It wasn't the first time they'd been this close, but it was the first time that his hands drifted cautiously towards her back, tipping her into him in a closeness that wasn't necessarily for comfort. "Friend, partner, and if there's more than that, it ain't a but. It's an and."

"Friend, partner, and…" The tilt of her chin came achingly slow, but the reward made their weeks, months, years of waiting worth it. After all, their first kiss definitely wasn't something to apologize for.

[crystarium-rose]

                      CRYSTARIUM-ROSE 700+ FOLLOW 

I guess it is time to make one of these for the people I love right? Yeah. I guess so.Thank you to all 700 of you for follow this blog. I’ve been around for quite some time now (I think it’s been 5 years now?) And I have to say that the people I have come across are by far the best people I have come to interact with. Yes my activity sucks, yes I should be quicker to reply to you all and yes, I should be around more too. But to some of you, time isn’t a issue and when I decide to come back to this blog, you are always there waiting for me with open arms.

I could not have done it without the people I call family. Yes. Family. There are the people that I know if I haven't been here for over a year and they are around, I can just pop into their inbox and shout at them like Lightning always does. I love you guys. Thank you for always being there for me. You guys deserve a special shout out.

My Crystarium: @phylxrchus​ - My partner in crime. My go 2. my 3rd right hand. You have been with me since YOU started on this blog. And when I saw you appear on my dash, I told Tifa AKA lockedfigther "I NEED THIS NOCTIS RPer IN MY LIFE. HE NEEDS TO ROLE PLAY WITH ME." Now look at us. We are partners. Maybe not the best partners, but we are pretty good ones too. Outside of RP, you are just amazing. You always send me a text out of no where that just makes my day 10000 times better. You are always keeping my spirits up and you're just a sweet individual that EVERYONE needs to get to know and love just like I did. Like I said, you're one of my best friends and nothing will change that (hopefully). @lockedfighter​ - GIRL. You're the reason why I am writing this follow forever right now. YOU are the main reason to all of this. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have met my family and we wouldn't be who we are today. You're literally my light for this muse and all of my other ones too. You're the reason why I role play. You're the reason why all these people follow me. You did this. For both of us. We have known each other for 6 years now. And these 6 years have been amazing. You are my sister, my girl, My bubbles whatever you want me to call you. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be writing this all down and making these pretty banners. You did this. And I cannot thank you. I wish you all the best in your role playing experience and I wish for more adventures and fun with you soon. I love you baby girl, keep smiling. @immortalguardian - OH MAN. You and lockedfighter go hand in hand here. I met you on my other blog (brexthoftheplxnet) and I cannot be happier that I still know you til this day. You are my best bro. You've heard me laugh, cry, yell, scream, throw things, snore etc etc. You've seen it all. And I cannot be happier. With you back on here, roleplaying with everyone, it really makes me happy. Everything is right in this world. My circle is complete. I know what you're thinking. "When are you getting on Mercy so we can ship?" Soon my darling. Soon. I promise you that. I love you my guardian. Protect me when this next flood of 700 come in okay? @boop-the-planet​ - Hello my Sombra. Welcome to the FF Universe. You have snuck in but idgaf about that. You met me when I was on my FFVII blog (FinalFantasyVIIForever), I didn't know who you were, vice versa for me and now look at us. 7 years later and here we are. My nickname for you is "My Right Cheek" and people just look at us like "..She's your what now?" and you and I laugh. Most of the time we are N'sync (get it? good) and I just think that is insane. We are a million miles away yet, we are on the same wavelengths. We don't roleplay much (which is pretty pathetic) but hopefully that will change once I get Mercy rolling. Anyways, I love you to the moon and back. Stick around for a while. Enjoy the view ;) @howitzerximpact - OH JUSTIN, MY JUSTIN. You have make and abandoned so many blogs that I have lost track of them. I think this is your 6th blog now. Anyways, hey! Welcome back to my RP life with me again. Don't worry, im not going to ask you to marry me here too okay (wink wonk). Just like lockedfighter, boop-the-planet & immortalguardian, you've been through it all. The good times and bad, the better and for worse. You seen all sides of me and you still stuck around. Hopefully this muse sticks with you and we can interact on here as well. I love you this much (insert the size of Canada here). And don't you forget it. @jjillekkot​ - LAST BUT NEVER LEAST, My Darling white rose. MY Ninabean. My goodness, has time has flown. You, lockedfighter and I have known each other for far too long. And even though you and I don't talk as much as the others do, you're always on my mind. I am always thinking about you and how you are. Our lives have been so crazy since day one. Both of us graduated at the same time, we had our first jobs together, and now we are in our careers together. You're basically a sister to me man. it's fucking crazy just how much time we have known each other. But you're Yuffie has know Lightning for just as long too. Sure I haven't had her for as long at the blog has been up. But I told you first about Lightning and I have plotted about here before creating her on Tumblr. Anyways. You're my lil princess and I adore you babe. Stay strong, young one.

These are the people who make my experience so much more enjoyable on this site and hope to have many more adventures with you all.

The Army of Ones: @asouldivided @firixn @dragooniv @sanguinesaint​ @notavampirehere​ @aizstavis @darkprinceofjustice @lionseed @heavenscloudx @sanguinepeccatorum @gongagan-soldier @grxvidus @livandi@shockwavepulsars @caiiius @riotxblade @ablackwing @badassbarmaid @timidhero @papa-guna @adelicatefleur @goddess-of-glacians @triggerxhappy @aitaiiyo @runexxknight @adventurouswind @persuadedbyboko @blazeburning @lazuliss

Don’t feel disencouraged that you are not on my list. These are just people who has been with me through out my journey. Just send em a IM or a shout on the ask box and I will happily roleplay with you

Again, Thank you for making my time on here great, Here’s to the next 700 followers

-Jen.