#who im coming up with increasingly fun ways to torture

[andorerso]

there's ocs I like and then there's ocs who feel like a piece of my soul

[thegeminisage]

star trek update time! I AM BEHIND. tuesday we watched voy's "message in a bottle" and ds9's "who mourns for morn?" thursday we did ds9's "far beyond the stars" and last night we did voy's "hunters" and ds9's "one little ship."

message in a bottle (voy):

THIS ONE WAS SO EXCITING.............

i know vaguely how voyager ends because i have an internet connection but im still like omg omg omg theyre MAKING CONTACT WITH EARTH omg omg

like the whole episode i was so sure something would happen and they would get close but make no progress bc thats been the name of the game so far but THEY DID IT!!!

the emh was great here too. it was fun to see him next to someone who is basically who he used to be. that said, i didn't love who they cast for the other emh...i think it would have been more fun if it had been another zimmerman look alike or. better yet, julian bashir. julian bashir in this episode would have made it PERFECT

seven of nine shocking that guy was amazing. everyone say thank you to seven of nine for finding the communications relay

i get where b'elanna is coming from w seven but like............b'elanna is easily the rudest person on this ship. and i dont hold that against her i know where she is coming from but its hard to see her go damn seven youre rude when she is always snapping at everyone lskdjfgh

that said: Girl Fight

anyway "60k lightyears feels a little closer today" i welled up fr. great job everyone

who mourns for morn? (ds9):

i think i owuld have liked this episode a lot better if it didn't come so close to the magnificent ferengi episode...it's like very typical quark shenanigans and even though he IS my best friend now i don't think this was his best episode. he spent this whole episode just like...trying to do shenanigans and get money which is fine but it's all v surface level stuff. season 3 esque, if you will. the other episode had way more substance to it

that said, i love morn as a like bit character and i love that we found out increasingly improbable and fantastic things about him - cat burglar is almost as good as secret prince

even better when he got back and quark was like DON'T SAY A WORD after we've been talking about how talkative he is all episode and we have not heard him utter a single word in six seasons. incredible

i also like the two aliens who talked really slowly. very fun on-screen presence.

odo giving quark shit in this episode was also pretty good. like he was doing absolutely nothing illegal and odo literally didn't have anything better to do than harass him. E QUARK!

far beyond the stars (ds9):

this episode.

it is such a shame that avery brooks never did anything major outside of ds9. like, a handful of made for tv movies and that's IT?? ik i keep saying this but the man should have been an a-lister. holy fuck. he is SO talented it's insane

i was kinda hoping this guy was sisko's ancestor - that somehow for some reason the prophets were torturing him with visions too? but the fourth wall thing was really good too. and it also freaked me out i love a good fourth wall break <3

outside of the plot of this episode being good, the acting from everybody was phenomenal, but again, ESPECIALLY avery brooks...why can't tng and voyager holodeck episodes be like this?? jesus christ. like this had almost nothing at all to do with ds9 and i still loved it

aside from that, what a treat to see everybody out oft he makeup. some people i recognized ONLY by their voices. we had to pause and rewind several times to focus on what they were actually saying because we were so shocked at how different they looked, and in odo's case, sounded!

anyway, 10/10 episodes. bonus points for the fake jadzia going "oh my gawd she's got a wooorm in her belly" and giggling in disgusted delight <3

hunters (voy):

NEWS FROM HOME THIS IS SO EXCITING!!!!!!!! i SAID everybody say THANK YOU to seven of nine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i was so sure harry wasnt gonna get a letter i was shocked when it finally did come in

tom not getting his letter but knowing one was sent vs b'elanna having no one who loves her enough to send a letter but still learning all her friends are dead...i was glad she gave him a reality check but at the same time...they do kind of work. both of them left behind such shit situations that their lives actually IMPROVED once they got to the delta quadrant and that is Something. semi-reluctantly, i now get it

TUVOK'S A GRANDFATHER......................we've been speculating about his babies and potential grandbabies for 3.5 seasons and now we finally have some ANSWERS!!!!! this is obviously his first grandson but i would still love to know how old the rest of his kids are...i doubt theyre like Babies but young adults? older teens? no one tell me i want to find out on my own

thuh-rilled that janeway finally got dumped by mark. absolutely baffled as to why she and chakotay talked it over like that if they weren't gonna be endgame...when tf did they decide to get him with seven instead? like i don't object because then i don't have to pick between jc and j7 i guess but what the fuck?? it makes no sense. i'm not really Seeing jc7 in my mind palace yet but i'm trying

one little ship (ds9):

this one was so funny. spend an entire episode struck by the lighting bolt from mario kart

o'brien being like saauuur preoccupied with his size also...hilarious. he wanted to kill julian every time he made a pun. don't worry o'brien your wife will understand

that said, really good when julian talked him through those repairs. i think it's easy to forget how fucking smart o'brien is but julian literally did not forget. he solved problems.

"fry every cell in my tiny body" or whatever tf julian said. his tiny, tiny body

when worf was worried about his wife but she came to save him but she was 1cm tall

sisko delaying the repairs was really good...i feel like he meets a jem'hadar and the first thing he tries to do is make them feel a sense of personhood so they can get angry about the injustice of their situation. like, it shows that he has empathy but it's also an incredibly effective tactic - people like as respect sisko as a captain and as someone who fights fairly, honorably, and effectively in battle, so they all hold his opinion in high regard - and the sitch with the jem'hadar is SO skeevy that like of Course they are mad about it. so he can pretty easily manipulate them if he plays his cards right which is? fun and sexy

bonus for kira becoming hysterical at the idea of o'brien and the others becoming that tiny. i think this is when he started to get insecure

edit: i did forget to say initially i really hated the use of "alphas" in this episode. it was very bad and i did not enjoy it any time they said it.

TONIGHT: voy's "prey" and ds9's "honor among thieves."

[bi-robins-club]

jason had just settled onto his couch with a jane austen novel and his favourite peach iced tea when damian crept in through his window. he sighed internally and decided to simply ignore him. he had told damian to use the front door (nevermind the fact that jason rarely used the door) and more importantly? he was freaking comfortable. after a few minutes as jason flipped idly through the book, damian cleared his throat. jason sighed again, outwardly this time and reluctantly dragged his eyes up to his youngest brother. baby bat was shivering slightly from the rain outside and jason simply rasied an eyebrow as he sipped at his tea. scowling, dami stomped over to jasons bathroom to dry off. he rolled his eyes. how dramatic. damian was acting like he sentenced titus and alfred the cat to their deaths instead of how he was actually saving jason from deep cleaning his rain soaked carpet. (he was still going to deep clean the carpet the next time he tidied up but still)

when damian stalked back into the room, looking less like a wet, angry kitten and more like a dry, angry kitten, jason titled his head back and established eye contact.

"so what brings you over to my neck of the woods, demon spawn?"

instead of snapping back like jason expected, damian simply stood there looking extremely uncomfortable. he shuffled his feet, opened his mouth then closed it and sat next to jason on the couch he splurged way too much on.

"i don't know how to tell you this" dami began, hesitant "but i believe harper is experiencing thoughts of suicide"

jason jerked up, almost knocking over his tea (and what a damn waste that would be) before fixing damian with a look. he hadnt noticed anything different in roy lately but he knew more than anyone that depression acted strangely and was hard to pinpoint. his mind raced with thoughts of why roy might be suddenly suicidal, from a sudden relapse to not getting a happy meal toy included in his 3.99 box of clogged arteries. "why do you say that, damian?"

"i have been keeping an eye on his health since he became a close confidant to you and last night he said something worrying that i am still not able to parse the meaning of" jason smiled lightly at that, in damian speak he was basically declaring that he cared for roy- if for nothing else than for how happy he made jason. still he shook it off and asked what roy had said that was worrying dami.

"he was patrolling last night" jason knew that. roy had been picking up his patrols since jason had a nasty leg wound. it was the reason he wasn't out tonight. "and he was on the phone with an unknown person, though i am inclined to believe it was either Starfire or Canary" okay, still not surprising "and then he said that the only place he could die happy was between your thighs" oh hello blue screen. yes jasons mind was in the middle of rebooting but could you hurry it along? he almost missed what damian said next. "not only does he wish for death upon himself, he wishes for you to give it to him!"

"damian" jason managed, frantically trying to figure out a way to explain to his baby brother without including his sex life. "uhh its just an expression"

damians face brightened up slightly. "really? he does not wish to smother himself between your thighs?"

"yeah, its like...like just a way to say... mind your business? mmhmm" he struggled to get out, pulling an explanation out of his ass.

"you have told father to mind his business a thousand times but i dont recal you ever using that one. is it new?"

oh god. jason would rather die again than continue this conversation.

"uhh its only used if you're close to someone" jason didnt know what he didnt wrong but dami's eyes widened in clear worry. "i thought you and father were reconnecting? has something happened? are you fighting again?"

well shit. jason had not thought this one through. fuck roy and fuck his mile wide kink that centered around jasons thighs. he was going to kill him. and he wouldnt even use his thighs. "oh nonono dami we're fine, just not as close as me and roy" he hedged, pleading to gods he didnt believe in to stop this conversation with whatever means necessary. strike him dead if need be but *please*. damians eyes narrowed "and exactly how close are you with harper, jason?" jason stared in disbelief. how had his nice relaxing evening turned into such a shitshow? damian was fine with roy when he and jason were just friends but now that he was (correctly) assuming a relationship, his over protective instincts were kicking in? christ. he remembered how when dick and babs finally started dating (again), damian seemingly lost all respect for her and called her an evil harlot more than once.

thankfully he was saved by answering in the form of the best person jason had ever met aka duke thomas. he announced his presence by awkwardly coughing. jason met his dark eyes and mouthed 'help me' over damians head. duke smiled as if it was getting pulled out of him by torture but nodded.

"hey dames, dick wanted you to join him by the docks when you finished up here" damian scowled "cant you see i am clearly not finished yet"

"hah, well dick was facing up against scarecrow and i think he needed some back up but you know him"

"yes, he wont admit he needs help when he very clearly does" damian sighed "very well, ill go check on dick. you stay and question jason. " and with that damian clambered out the window and after he disappeared from sight, jason threw his head back to stare at his ceiling and groaned. duke laughed at him.

"hey daisy duke?" duke grumbled at the nickname and jason cracked a smile "how did you know i needed back up?" duke winced and ran a hand over his dreads. he made a face and jasons soul was slowly draining out of his body. "oh haha funny story" duke rocked back on his feet and faked laughed "damians com was still connected to the channel" jason froze.

"who was on the channel oh my god" duke smiled thinly and his hand paused on his head. "other than me? everyone." jason buried his head in his hands and let out a high pitched whine. duke consolingly rubbed his shoulder. this is why jason loved him. he hadn't even laughed at jason like tim, dick or steph would or started plotting death like damian started to. he and cass would just offer support. jasons favorite brother and sister right here folks. duke sat down beside him

"listen. i know what it's like to be outed when youre not ready and when i heard damian grilling you about roy, i thought i would help" jason turned and stared at his brother. duke was staring at his hands and avoiding eye contact. "i got caught with a boy when i was 15 in high school. its pretty shitty to be gay and poor in a homophobic neighbourhood but its worse to be gay, poor and black." jason knocked shoulders with him. "if you tell me the name of whatever asshat outed you, I'll shoot him for you." duke let out a waterly laugh. "they kept bullying me for being gay but if they even listened, they would have realised that im pan" he joked "its a completely different thing after all". jason snorted

"that was horrible"

duke winced "yeah, it was wasnt it. im bad at this" it was jasons turn to avoid eye contact now.

"talia once caught me with a league operative. a male operative. i was so paranoid for days until i caught shiva leaving her rooms. i got the courage to tell her i was bi and she just patted my cheek and asked how my training was going."

duke huffed out a laugh. "bruce gives you shit but i for one think your lesbians moms are cool"

jason laughed with him "just wait until you meet Ducra. shes a badass"

"ducra?" he questioned with a weird look. "how many moms do you actually have? i knew about diana and your assassin moms but thats a new name" jason burst into laughter at the expression on dukes face. "its not fair man. steph is the only other one with a mom and you have four! you need to share" jason choked on his laughter and shoved duke.

"first of all, its only *three*. ducra is like my badass abuela"

"dont you already have a badass grandma? have you forgotten about Ma Gunn? she threatened to shoot bruce in the dick last week!"

"yes well excuse you i need strong female role models in my life, fuck you" the two of them continued to joke around for a little while longer before jason caught a flash of black kelvar outside his window and sighed. duke followed his eyes and smiled before patting jasons shoulder and pushing off. "have fun with the one strong male role model in your life. im going to see if cass needs help" both of them knew that cass wouldn't need help but jason accepted the excuse for what it was. "me and steph are still coming over to study tomorrow. college is kicking my ass and i need you to explain this English assignment to me"

jason scoffed "im not writing your essay for you"

"eh worth a try. bye jace" duke gave a two fingered salute and slipped out the window. jason took the brief reprieve to sip his tea and mourned when he discovered the ice had melted and watered down the peach taste. for the third time that night, someone crept into his window. oh well. third times the charm right? jason wasn't going to acknowledge bruce until he said something himself. it was a repeat of damian. jasom read his book as it got increasingly uncomfortable.

"jason."

"bruce" jason drawled, not lifting his eyes from his book. bruce grunted like the neanderthal he was and jason finally huffed out a heaving breath before marking his page and looking up. bruce looked supremely uncomfortable. actually his face looked exceedingly neutral but jason knew how to read bruce and that was the brow furrow of how do i deal with jason without fucking it up? jason was well famailairsed with that one.

"you know i love you" jasons own eyebrows rose. bruce only said 'i love you' like four times a year tops. and he usually never wasted it on jason. bruce deflated at whatever face jason must have made. goddamn it. this was why jason always fought with bruce with his helmet on, he couldnt control his facial expressions for shit. "no you dont know that." bruce smiled thinly and to jasons suprise, quickly crossed the room and knelt, placing his hands on jasons shoulders.

"even if you dont believe it, and its my own fault that you do and i hate that i ever caused you to even doubt my love for you, i swear that i do, jay lad" jason was completely frozen. he had expected bruce to yell at him for letting roy go unchecked on patrol last night and how irresponsible he was yada yada, not this declaration of feelings that he had no clue how to deal with. he couldnt remember the last time bruce called him that. it had to have been when he was still in those scaly green panties and pixie boots. and not the adult verison that jason picked up from a halloween store on a whim just to see roys eyes.

bruce sighed and drew jason into a hug. when bruces shoulder started getting wet, jason was horrified to realise he was crying. "i wanted you to know that i wouldnt love you any less for loving a man. but you have to know that i love you in the first place for that to happen" bruce said self deprecating.

"shut the fuck up" jason said sniffling and gripping his dads back. "i hate you"

bruce laughed softly at him before pressing a kiss to the side of jasons head. "i want you to know that i expect roy-and you- over at dinner on sunday. i need to meet the man that stole my babys heart" he murmured. jason laughed wetly "youve already met roy, you just want to con me into actually coming to family dinner"

bruce smiled "that was before i knew you two were dating. roy needs to know what hes getting into" jason leaned back enough to stare into bruces eyes and weakly punched him in the chest "dont threaten my boyfriend. he refused to look at me for two weeks after t was done with him" bruce sighed longingly "its times like this when i remember what caused me to love talia in the first place."

"bruce!" the aforementioned man laughed and hugged jason tightly before stepping back a few steps. "Sunday dinner. you and roy. 8 pm." on a whim jason reached out and snagged bruces hand. "hey" he started, swallowing "you wanna stay for a while? we could watch a movie or something" bruces eyes softened and he nodded. "let me change out of the suit."

and if roy had crept in after patrol only to see jason napping on his dads chest to a shitty action movie playing in the background and took several pictures, well that bruces fault for not waking up when roy stumbled it. (nevermind the fact that bruce had every single one of those pictures saved on his phone) (nevermind the fact that after roy put his phone away, he was greeted to the sight of batman glaring at him as he twisted a batarang around his fingers. it was sorta ruined by the fact that jasons curls was hiding the lower half of his face but roy was still adequately terrified)

[caracalfeather]

WARNING- Cats and Birds is a mob AU fanfiction of the Arcana game, and is not meant for young audiences and is not meant to offend anyone. Some writing choices were made so characters are out of their canon way of acting and thinking. Please do not be offended by character choices made by the authors and content creators, this story was made for fun and in the way we wanted it to be. The story was not hijacked by any of the authors to make any ships or characters overshadow any other. All content contained in this story has been agreed upon and accepted by all parties in it’s creation.

TW- Cats and Birds contains scenes that may not be suitable with some readers, including themes of violence, smoking/drug use, sex, cursing and various other strong themes. Special warnings for scenes will be posted with chapters. Proceed with caution and Reader’s discretion is advised.

9

The next morning, Rose shivered against ilya, waking up to a cold room. She wrapped herself in the blanket.

Julian stirred awake, he just laid there and didn’t bother to move, the barking had stopped sometime in the night so Julian wasn’t completely sleepless.

Morning darling.” Rose purred and kissed his neck, smiling “You were rough last night.”

“Hmmmm….you think?” He sighed, caressing her face.

“It was good. But that nickname wasnt your best idea. It was cute though.” She sighed

Julian blushed and hid underneath his pillow. Damn her. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?!??” He groaned into his mattress, her haunting was becoming increasingly annoying as long as that goddamned photo wasn’t burned to ash.

“D-did i do something again?” she looked at him, her smile dropping from her face.

Julian sat up in a hurry and cupped Rose’s face. “No! No darling! It’s not you! God it could never be you.” He sighed, “I think I’m being haunted is all.”

“.......” She looked at him, skeptical and stood up “Im...going to shower…” She picked up her clothes and mumbled.

With rage boiling in his blood Julian dug through the waste basket and tore the photo up. “Good riddance to you, you're ruining everything!” He shouted, the pieces fluttering to the floor. He tore the photo in a few big chunks but Julian was more disappointed in himself more than anyone.

As Rose showered, Plume was downstairs making plans for Rose's next trip heist. It would be a little longer than her last.

Julian was on torture that morning, he slipped on his black gloves, and faced the cell. His mind was not in the right place but a job had to be done.

“Alright. Our queen is heading out for a month or two to chicago. She’s going on a supply run and needs a companion.” Plume set down the map of the route as a few guys volunteered. Meanwhile, Rose was toweling off and packing her bags, mumbling to herself and trying to think if she’d done something to upset ilya. She hurt on the inside and wished she could just disappear into her bed.

He opened the cell and was met by two brown eyes. The woman who was handcuffed was big and she looked….really familiar.

The woman looked up, “look….if you’re here to torture me I already told the big fella that it was all a misunderstanding-“ her eyes flashed and she laughed. “Noooooo…..yes? It can’t be???”

Julian looked into the eyes of...Bèatrice.

“Bèa….what the hell are you doing here?” Julian growled.

Bea spat blood into the concrete. “I could say the same to you, you son of a bitch. We all thought you DIED.”

Julian could not handle this today, he rubbed his temples, “but that’s not why you're here.”

“Right…..I’m here because I was looking for Madeve your dog.” She explained, “he’s been getting out a lot recently and I’ve been helping get him home.”

He nodded and Bèa continued.

“What would she say if she knew you were here? Would she ever forgive you-“

Her words were cut short by a bullet to the head. Julian held the gun with shaking hands and stepped out from the cell. He was probably going to get a scolding from Plume, but it was worth not having to deal with this matter anymore.

Plume looked up from the map at the sound and growled “Damn it. Alright everyone, prep the queen and get ilya.”

Like clockwork Ilya was dragged to Plume. Julian with a blood splattered face was so done with everything and everyone.

“Who the fuck did you kill now you usesless dog?” Plume hissed, tossing the map into a bag and glaring at him.

“A trespasser.” Julian hissed crossing his arms over his chest.

“Whatever. Rose is leaving for a few months.” He pushed Julian into a chair “We’re getting her things ready.”

“I take it, I'm going with her.” He sighed, “I am pretty sure I’m the last person she wants to see currently.”

“It's up to you. She’s getting her clothes from your room right now.” He mumbled. Upstairs, rose was bending down to grab her shirt, pausing as she noticed torn pieces of paper on the floor. Carefully she looked at them, her heart sinking slightly as she saw a beautiful face she’d only seen in magazines. Her mind began to wander as she put the paper in her pocket. What was he doing with her torn picture? Was it an infatuation? Maybe it was just remnants of an old magazine…

Julian found Rose in his room. He smiled, wiping some stray blood from his cheek. “Well, I took care of the trespasser.”

“Huh? Oh...thanks.” Rose put her jacket on and fixed her hair, unimpressed.

“Did I piss you off again?” Julian frowned, “Rose, this is becoming a pattern and I would like for it not too.”

“No, I'm just busy and sore...sorry.” She sighed, going to the door, the ripped pieces in her pocket.

Julian sighed and began packing himself, meeting Rose out in the garage when he was done. “So we’re going all the way across the country. For supplies. “

“We? You're coming with me?” She put her bags in the back as plume nodded “Yes. and You two are fetching more artillery from our Chicago pride since we can't ship them anymore.”

“Perfect.” He smiled, tossing his bag in along with Rose’s. “Are we going in disguise this time?” His smile widened into a mischievous grin.

“Yep. Once you're in the city rose will be dressed as Mistress thorne and you” Plume tossed lingerie looking close at him “Will be her collared sub Thomas.” Plume laughed “No one questions the mistress.” It was a joke, but he didn't doubt ilya would play the part anyway.

Julian laughed, “ha! Good thing it’s a long drive it will give me plenty of time to get into character.”

“You'll keep your mouth shut.” Rose mumbled and got into the driver's seat.

“As my Mistress commands.” Julian bowed dramatically and got into the car.

Blasting music, rose took off to the highway, opening the window as they began the trip.

“The city seems strangely quiet today.” Julian sighed staring out the window, “we haven’t gone on a long trip together in a very long time.”

“Yeah… almost a year now.” she mumbled and glanced at him “New york last time.”

Julian chuckled, “That’s Right! That mission was an absolute disaster….but it was fun. And you had fun fucking me into oblivion.”

“Mhm. next time i'll gag and peg you with a strap.” She weaved her way through the streets, listening to an old rock song.

He unbuttoned his shirt slightly, his charismatic smirk on full display. “Just hearing you say that makes me hungry and excited.” He traced a gentle line from her cheek down her neck.

She slapped his hand away and huffed “I'm not touching you until we get to chicago.” Her voice growled “Then I'm going to make sure you submit and learn your place.”

Julian held up his hands in full surrender, shutting up. He instead brought his attention to the passing streets.

The ride was a long 10 hours until they finally stopped at an inn. It was pitch black outside as they got a room, Rose spent another hour nursing a blunt on the balcony. Her mind was full of memories of old lovers. Each had ended up leaving her for Hollywood models and performers, saying they were better than her. They had called her an alley cat, a mangy stray. And after finding that picture, rose was sure ilya was fantasizing about being with a performer. Someone prettier and more talented. She finished smoking and dropped her head, looking at old scars on her arms.

Julian wrapped his arms around her and hummed into her neck. “Someone is in the pits of despair” he chuckled, “ I thought I was going to get punished once we arrived.”

“In chicago. You have 15 more hours.” She looked at him “Cant a girl smoke in the night in peace?” She looked at the dark night.

He let her go, “alright I get it. You're upset I’ll leave you be.” He retreated back into the room. Mulling over what he did this time. Each answer leading to the one thing he had been fighting these past 2 weeks.

“It doesn't feel good, does it?” She whispered and looked at the moon “Gods, my papi would kill me for being this petty.”

Julian heavily sighed, “you think I haven’t been suffering? Your suffering makes me suffer! And aside from that, I’m still just suffering.”

Rose went into the bathroom to shower, sitting on the tiles as warm water hit her back. She got lost in thought, a few tears mixing with the water.

Julian flopped back on the bed. Rubbing his eyes in frustration. He wished that bullet had killed him, it would spare a lot of feelings and memories that were now causing issues.

Rose came back to the bed, laying down with her back to ilya, browsing her phone quietly and yawning.

He looked over at her, “I’m sorry.” He muttered.

“For what?” She mumbled, setting down her phone on the nightstand.

“For everything.” He sighed, “I’m sorry I stumbled upon your branch in Spain, I’m sorry you had to save me while I was bleeding out. I’m sorry I have made life so much worse for you. Rose I love you, but there are things that….haunt me. They have come back and it has affected our relationship, and I’m sorry!!! So so sorry!!”

“....Believe it or not… You're the best thing that's happened to me ilya.” She mumbled, looking at the wall “And i know there's shit that both of us deal with…. But i don't regret saving you. Or falling in love.”

Julian shook his head, “what if I regret being saved?”

“NO.” she sat up and glared at him “You shut the fuck up right now ilya. Don't ever say that.”

“...I CAN’T HELP IT ROSE!” He shouted sitting up. “I have been suppressing so much pain!”

“THEN WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET IT OUT?! IF NOT TO ME THEN TO SOMEONE OR SOMETHING ELSE?!” She got out of bed, her eyes stinging as she went and locked herself in the bathroom.

Julian punched the wall and fell back into the bed. Rubbing his eyes, he tore his eye patch off and rubbed his bad eye. Trying to prevent everything from coming out.

[tfw-no-tennis]

hxh RESUME

back at it again w/the hxh, heres my recap of the last few eps 

ok so i totally forgot to recap that one ep at the end of the hunter exam arc lets see what i remember from like 3 wks ago lollll

i thiiiiink i left off in the middle of ep 21 lol. i really dont remember much tbh so im gonna skim the ep to refresh

exposition time! its so wild that if you lose ur hunter card That It like u cant get another or retake the exam hgabjdfuhasjf Ls 

also the fact that you can sell it is rlly interesting 

leorio & kurapika backing up gon as he confronts illumi again :’) good lil family 

illumi u fool. gon is a shounen protag. he can do anything he sets his mind to

the fact that gon thanks illumi for telling him where killua is....hes literally THAT polite like...what a perfect boy 

hisoka just fuckgin stepping out of the shadows....ok bitch 

the fact that gon fucked up illumis arm that bad with one hand....boi is STRONK 

AUGH AUGH AUGHHHH HISOKA IS SO CREEPY AUGHHH I HATE THIS BIIIITCH 

ok but like is illumi implying that hisoka is a fr p*do bc uhhhhh thats so nasty oh lord. pls stay away from gon, and killua, and like everyone as a matter of fact 

EWWWWWWWWWW I HATE HISOKA HES SO NASTY. PLS STOP MAKING P*RNO FACES IN RELATION TO 12 YR OLD BOYS. 

no but rlly what IS hisoka gonna do now. im assuming he’ll show up p soon (tho probs not in the zoldyc arc like i thought bc its shorter than i thought) 

ok the fact that they have the internet is hilariously wild to me for some reason....it just seems like this would be one of those fantasy shounen worlds with very little tech (a la one piece) but lol nope we can just google shit hvbhjdhjdfks

gon: it was fun when you beat me up for 3 hours and broke my arm! seeya dude!

i love gon he is so chill and doesnt seem to hold grudges except when it really matters (like hisoka and illumi) 

hanzo has.....ninja business cards....thats amazing hvbhsdjkujfnd

dont worry pokkle, leorio was basically carried thru the hunter exam by various people and also won by default. he still deserves his license tho

an exotic game hunter sounds pretty cool! i wonder if we’ll see pokkle again. kinda doubt it? that sounds pretty firmly non-combat based, and therefore probably pretty far from any plot lol

so gons dad is a bigshot huh.....whatever hed be a bigger deal if he didnt abandon his son tbh 

gon swinging his feet on the bench....sooo cute 

so ging could restore a bunch of ruins but he couldnt raise his son...ok

im just gonna be bitter at this guy for abandoning the most perfect boy vhbhjfbsjhdhbfsk sorry dude but being a good hunter doesnt make up for being a shit father 

gon is so precious ;_; 

WHAT WAS SATOTZ GONNA SAY TO GON???

why does it look like theyre googling things on MS paint 

ah yes, padokea, on the continent of Africa But Sideways 

idk if i talked abt it before but the world map is WILD lmao i love how its all the continents/landmasses scrambled around.....im super curious abt that weird island in the top center of the map, thats the only thing that immediately sticks out as not having a real life equivalent 

the music in this show is so charming :’) i love the main theme sm 

gon is sooo precious i literally cant get over it. and his hurry to rescue killua is so sweet....and i love how naturally charming/charismatic gon is....pretty much everyone he meets likes him, especially leorio and kurapika, who basically adopted him after knowing him for like a day, and continue to be completely taken by him

ok wtf is satotz & co talking abt......do they know something abt ging that they arent allowed to tell gon???? shouldnt gon have access to the same info now that hes a hunter? i need ANSWERS

i bet this whole thing abt the hunter exam not rlly being over is a metaphor abt the hunter exam NEVER truly ending bc youre always being tested, or st

ok the ED continues to be So Much like especially the last shot where the 4 main characters look like theyre posing for a JC Penny catalog while the singer goes FULL metal-screamo

ok ruth and i just rewatched the next two eps woohoo

i love that there are tourist busses that take people to the front gates so they can like pose for pics and stuff vhbhjafdsfkj and its like ‘ah yes here are where the local assassins live!’ thats so funny yet it makes so much sense

i love that leorio passed tf out during the bus ride. big big mood 

gon is so cute...hes like ok yes i understand that we’re not supposed to go in but i think they can make an exception for me bc im very polite. 

those 2 dudes r so ugly and so dead god bless

that bigass buster sword....sir please 

ruth and i rlly thot that the old guard guy was gonna turn out to be grandpa zoldyk or st lol

the fact that the dog managed to eat All their flesh but left some clothes....skill 

also the dog is named mike but it sounds like the guy is calling him miku hvbjdfssk

this cant be the first time some morons have been killed here likeeee 

i cant believe nobody has visited the zoldyk estate in 20 years damn they all rlly b havin no friends. depressing 

the whole gates thing is wild. also that part where gon gets the math wrong on the weight.....BIG mood kiddo 

ok the part where gons on the phone w/the butler is soooo good oh man. i love how gon just calmly dials the phone again after hes hung up on the first time and then YELLS....and leorio and kurapikas faces r so good 

also the butler guy unfortunately has a point, it isnt foolproof that gon is here Legit....but he IS let him see his tiny bf :( 

as ruth pointed out, the butler guy is reminiscent of kuro from one piece. same vibes 

maybe if leorio was jacked like he is in the manga/1999 anime he couldve opened the gate that first time around....Ls 

god i love this shows approach to Everything so far,....as ruth put it, half the time its like ‘oh wow they should do [x]/i wish theyd do [x] but ofc they wont cause its a shounen’ but then they DO do [x] and its like damn thats dope 

anyways i love how gon is increasingly approaching situations with his Plucky Shounen Protag Attitude in full swing, and he pretty much gets shot down every time. BUT his general determination to see killua bc killuas his FRIEND and hes gonna RESCUE HIM is still a good and pure motivating force 

like here, when hes climbing over the wall and hes like whatever i dont wanna have to deal w/being tested thats bullshit, i wanna see killua, my intentions are pure, im gonna try my luck with the dog....i was like ok yeah he’ll get over and like tame or defeat the dog and the guard will be suitably impressed bc nobodys ever done That before, and then gon will continue on to get killua 

but NOPE instead the guard calls him down and explains that gon Will Die if he tries that, and then the guard will die too for letting that happen. and gon is like oh shit my actions have consequences for people other than me, wow. 

and THEN the guard takes them in to meet the dog. and hot DAMN that is a scary creature. not even really a dog tbh. they did an excellent job making the dog Legit Scary and not just like, big and flashy looking....those eyes are so soulless, and the proportions are freaky 

and the guard says exactly what i was thinking - that gon would use his Country Boy Woodland Creature Skills to workaround the dog....but then the subversion - this creature is NOTHING like the woodland critters gon is probably used to dealing with. theres no way gon stood a chance here. the guard just saved him from a really unfortunate death 

i love all the Super Heavy Stuff in the servant house that seems so inconvenient vbhjdkfasjfld. also forgot to mention earlier but the guard guy being Absolutely Ripped was wild and kinda funny 

training montage! gon continues to be so cute. and i love so much how leorio and kurapika are like no, you rest, we’ll take care of this. good parents!!!!

and then!!!! they sync up and use the power of gay love to almost open the gate. but then gon uses the power of Improbable Shounen Protag Healing Speed to toss that arm sling off and help out

i feel like leorio was side-eyeing gon like w8 a sec u broke that arm like a few days ago that aint right.....

oh man i almost forgot abt that scene with the zoldyks torturing killua :( :( this poor kid he doesnt deserve that 

also mom zoldyck seems truly awful but i must say her aesthetic does fuck. the victorian-lookin outfit paired with the futuristic cyclops visor thing....excellent. also im betting this face bandages are from killua cutting her face 

this family is so fucked up hvbsjdhjfbakdfn

killua telling his mom that gon is definitely gonna make it there :’) hes got such unshakable faith in his bf thats so good.....

back w/the gang, and immediately they run into more trouble in the form of the young girl butler, whose name i dont know, but i love her....her design is SO good oh man. a non-caricature black person? who also isnt sexualized? in MY anime??????

 i love how gons approach to conflict is currently ‘let more powerful person beat me up for hours straight in hopes that they get tired or something idk bro’ like....i love him lol, is it in an effort to show how determined he is? he doesnt even try to dodge her blows or get around her....id be tryin to hop that fence lol 

oh shit the tiny zoldyk kid from earlier is spying on them....she was w/the mom so im sure thats not good

when he punches the rock part and it breaks....strong boiiii 

oh man that little flashback from when killua first came back and told her that he made a friend ;_; bruh 

i love butler girl :( she wants to let gon but knows it isnt allowed....and as soon as she starts to waver BAM here comes mom zoldyck JFC that was so sudden and jarring....im assuming butler girl isnt dead cause that would be lame and anticlimactic 

also IS THAT NEN??? NEN>>>??? NEN??? HM? NEN????????? 

im so annoying abt nen i need to make one of those ‘is this a pigeon?’ memes w/’is this nen?’ bc thats me anytime anything remotely weird happens lmao

i do think its rlly nen this time tho

anyways shit is wild, cant wait to meet the full zoldyck family 

PREDICTION CORNER: 

as i said above i doubt hisoka will show up now bc this arc is a lot shorter than i anticipated. also im doubting that illumis even gonna show up honestly 

i think we’re gonna have this OP for a while, as the part just at the end shows gon and hisoka fighting in what looks to be an arena, and ik the next arc is the heavens arena arc, which im assuming is the tournament arc....

also i have no idea what that weird building in the OP is but my guess is that its the building w/the heavens arena in it bc its tall and,,,,heaven 

i predict there wont be much fighting in this little arc bc how tf else is it so short. at this point i rlly think gon is just gonna grab killua and go lmao. im super curious abt how thats gonna go down, considering that killua is currently strung up just bc he wont apologize...so i cant imagine his family would just let him leave w/gon. i wonder if killua will fight them, or if gons determination will impress them and then theyll let killua go (doubt it)

thats basically it....we’ll see abt the next few eps holla

[shannaraisles]

Roll For Initiative

A commission piece for @lechatrouge673, who told me to write something that made me happy. So I ran with the DnD idea!

***

"All right, everyone ready? Settled in?"

Erin looked around the table, snorting with laughter at the sight of her brother, Patrick, attempting to steal yet more of Ana's pierogi off her plate, only to earn himself a slap on the hand and a sharp look. Across the table, Brian was finishing off his sandwich hurriedly, and Toby was - of course - going through his dice ritual to decide which ones made the cut for tonight. They were down a couple of players today, and a couple were going to be late, but that wasn't a game killer. What she had in mind for this weekend was adaptable.

"Recap away, noodle," Patrick managed through his last mouthful, wiping his hands as he did so.

"All right, then."

She drew in a slow breath, settling her thoughts, and began.

"Feeble Noobs ... "

Why did I ever let them call themselves that?

"Following a harrowing adventure in search of Andraste's Ashes, you succeeded in passing the Gauntlet of Faith, proving yourselves worthy to take a pinch of the Ashes back to Redcliffe to cure Arl Eamon and restore him to health. In gratitude for what you did, and for saving his son, as well as concern for the future of the country, he agreed to lend his voice in opposition to Teyrn Loghain Mac Tir in the upcoming Landsmeet. However, his plan involves supplanting Queen Anora, and putting Alistair on the throne instead, since your reluctant paladin is the illegitimate son of the former king, Maric."

"Backstory comes to bite me in the arse," Brian muttered with a grin.

"That's what backstory is for," Erin assured him cheerfully. "You returned to Denerim with the arl, setting up base at his estate, and began to explore the city, hoping to make a connection with some of the nobles and win them to your side. You were attacked by the Antivan Crows, lead by a former colleague of your friend Zevran, who wanted to fulfill his contract on the Grey Wardens and take him back with them. Zevran chose to place himself between Darrian and Alistair, and his former colleagues, and after a tough fight, you emerged victorious. You then decided to treat yourselves to a night at The Pearl, Denerim's foremost brothel, which I am never going to forget -"

The laughter at the table was a very clear reminder that allowing her players to have too much fun at her expense was going to turn into a story for all the years to come. Jenny, as Zevran, had insisted on sampling the delights of all the men and women at The Pearl once she'd discovered it was a fade to black situation, just to make Erin describe and play an increasingly odd selection of throwaway NPCs made up on the spot.

"Upon returning to Arl Eamon's estate, you found Erlina, Queen Anora's elven companion, beside herself with worry. Arl Howe, Loghain's right-hand man, had imprisoned the queen in his city estate. Against Eamon's wishes, you decided to rescue her. and with a series of truly stunning stealth rolls, and one very lucky save, you made your way into the Howe estate, where you freed Soris, Darrian's cousin, and discovered a few means by which you can sway some of the nobles to your cause. You were confronted by Howe himself, and managed to take down both him and his elite guard, freeing Queen Anora in the process. However, when you attempted to leave, you were stopped by Ser Cauthrien, Loghain's loyal commander, and a large number of city guards, who demanded that the Grey Wardens surrender and be put under arrest. Rather than risk the queen's presence in your midst being discovered, Darrian and Alistair voluntarily surrendered, allowing the rest of your party to escape back to Eamon's estate with the queen. And that is where we will pick up ..."

"Hey, you missed out me saving Sten's life with my amazing druid healing skills," Patrick objected mischievously.

"You're a dog, shut up," was Erin's response, sticking her tongue out at her brother for a moment before turning to Brian and Toby.

"Alistair and Darrian," she said, "you come to on filthy blankets in a dark, dingy prison. You’re in a cage - one of many that you can see lining the walls - and you can see other prisoners, some of whom have clearly been tortured, some lying very still. Your equipment, your armor, even your clothes have been taken off you as you lay unconscious. There’s a single guard patrolling the floor outside the cages. What do you do?"

"We're naked?" Brian asked in surprise.

"They've left your underpants on you, but everything else is gone," Erin clarified.

"Is there anything in our cell, or in the cells that I can reach through the bars, that I could use to pick the lock?" Toby inquired. He was always first to jump into the action if he possibly could.

"Roll an investigation check."

"While Darrian's grubbing around on the floor, Alistair's going to wrap the blanket around himself like a girl getting out of the shower," Brian interjected over the sound of rolling dice.

"Ha!" Ana grinned at him across the table. "I knew Alistair had a thing for Darrian!"

"No, he's just worried about offending his friend with the indecency of his ... manly nipples," Brian countered, blatantly not believing a word he was saying.

"5, so that's ... 10," Toby piped up.

Erin glanced at her sheet.

"You root around for a while, reaching through the bars to the cells on either side, but you don't come up with anything that could be used as a lock pick," she said. "As you finish your investigation, the guard rounds the corner to walk by your cell."

"I whip my hand back into the cell and turn to Alistair." Toby assumed his chosen accent for Darrian with an ease that made Brian mock glare at him. "What in the Void are you doin'?"

"I look embarrassed and shuffle a bit, tucking my blanket tighter around my manliness," Brian said, taking a moment to find Alistair's voice again before adding, "It's cold in here."

"What, worried y'goin' to poke my eye out with your nips?"

"Well, you do stand very close sometimes." Brian bit down on a laugh that would have destroyed his accent, and went on. "So what do we do?"

"How well armed and armored is the guard?" Toby asked Erin.

"Standard for a prison guard," she mused. "Splint mail, helmet, longsword and dagger."

"Showing any interest in us?"

"Apart from a glance in to make sure you're still there, he doesn't seem interested," she said. "Guard duty's guard duty, and you're all but naked and locked in a cage."

"Okay." Toby slipped back into Darrian as he turned to Brian. "You play sick, and when 'e comes in, I'll jump 'im."

"What with? A handful of ... what is that, poop? Ergh."

"Just do it."

Brian rolled his eyes, grinning, and turned to Erin.

"Alistair is very reluctantly going to fall down in a swoon and start groaning like there's a bear sitting on top of him," he declared cheerfully, already reaching for his dice.

"Darrian will yell for the guard to come and take a look," Toby added.

"All right." Erin considered this briefly. "Alistair, roll me a performance check."

"Performance? Ugh ..."

The dice rattled on the table. Brian took one look at the roll, and thumped his forehead onto the dice tray, holding up a single digit.

"Natural one!"

As the rest of the group burst out laughing, Erin giggled her way through the guard's reaction.

"So, while Alistair's lying on the ground making ridiculous noises, the guard comes to the cell door and looks in, and he just, he's not impressed," she said, lowering her timbre for the guard. "Very nice. D'you do duck impressions too?"

Brian snorted. "Alistair stops groaning and just looks up at the guard, sort of pouting," he said. "You don't think I have a career on the stage then?"

"Mate, you're gonna be dead in the morning, so do what you like," was the guard's response.

"How close is he to the bars?" Toby asked.

"Couple of feet," Erin answered.

"Great. I launch myself at the cell door and try to grab him through the bars."

"This is why we need Darrian," Ana commented to Patrick. "He just does stuff."

"Oh, woof." Patrick nodded sagely in agreement, laughing as she backhanded his shoulder lightly. "What? I'm a dog!"

"You're an idiot," Ana informed him with a smile.

"Roll, um ..." Erin drummed her fingers for a moment. "You know what, just roll a straight dexterity check for me."

"Twenty." Toby shook his head as she opened her mouth. "Not natural."

"Okay, well, while the guard is laughing at Alistair, Darrian rushes the bars and manages to grab him by the collar of his mail," Erin said, ignoring the quiet conversation to her right. "What do you want to do with him?"

"I want to ... yank him hard and try and knock him out against the bars," Toby decided.

"Bear in mind, you're rolling against his AC, and your arm is thrust through a space about six inches wide," she reminded him. "Give me a strength check at disadvantage."

"Oh god, strength is really not my strong suit," Toby muttered, rolling his d20 twice. "Yeah, I'm a weakling. Doesn't happen."

"What did you get?" Patrick asked curiously.

"Rolled a five and a two, so that's three," Toby said with a grin.

"All right, so as you go to yank him toward the bars, the guard pulls backwards, and your grip just isn't enough to hold onto him as he backs up," Erin narrated. "Don't you try that again, y'hear? Bloody Wardens. He scowls at you, but he doesn't come close again, just turns and goes back on his round of the prison floor."

"Can't say you didn't try," Brian said encouragingly. "So what do we do now?"

"I'm out of ideas. S'pose we're waitin' to be rescued now." Toby smirked across the table at the other two. "Over to you, fearless warriors."

"Oh, yeah, this is going to go really well," Ana drawled, glancing at Patrick.

Anyone playing off him tended to have a bit of a rough go of it because of his obtuse character creation. He'd agreed to play the game when his little sister had begged, but his condition had been that he was allowed to create his own unique character. What he had come up with was a druid stuck permanently in dog form, which made for some interesting scenarios.

"All right, so - for the sake of brevity - let's say that you got Anora safely back to Arl Eamon's estate, and it was decided that Sten and ... the dog ... have the best chance of getting the Wardens out safely," Erin said. She knew this group too well to let them have a debate, even when there were only two of them involved in it.

"Sten, Barkspawn ... you approach Fort Drakon. It's a walled, heavily fortified keep, pretty much in the center of the city, named after the Orlesian emperor who founded the Andrastian Chantry. It's the oldest building in Denerim, built out of heavy gray granite, and it kind of squats on the landscape in a series of concentric circles built around a very tall tower in the center. There are two guards on the main gate, but they don't challenge you as you pass through. What do you do?"

Ana straightened her shoulders, channeling her inner Qunari as she dropped her timbre into her character's voice.

"They call this a fort? I thought it would be bigger."

"Woof."

A shared snort of laughter went up from the other side of the table as Ana glared at Patrick. Evidently he wasn't going to make this easy on her, role-play wise. He gave her an innocent smile in answer.

"Stands to reason that the cells would be in the tower," Anna mused, apparently deciding to ignore Patrick's insight for the time being. "So I guess we go to the tower?"

Erin nodded.

"Okay then," she said, checking her notes swiftly. "The tower is easily the tallest building in the city. It's also very wide. I mean, you could fit a couple of dragons in this thing with room to spare. There are more guards in evidence in the courtyard around it, but nobody challenges you as you make your way to the door of the tower itself. However, as you approach this enormous, thick-oak door, the two guards in front of it step forward and bar your way. They are better armored and armed than the guards on the main gate of the outer wall, but they seem kind of weary, kind of bored. Door duty isn't exactly rife with excitement. One of them holds up his hand, and says to you, Sten, What is your business in Fort Drakon?"

"Barkspawn stands up a little straighter, and just looks the guy right in the eye," Patrick piped up. "Staring him down like only a mabari can."

"Sten's doing pretty much the same," Ana agreed. "He looms over the guard. I'm a giant with a war dog. Either I am making a delivery, or I am beseiging your fort. Hope for the former."

Erin chuckled. She loved the way Sten had developed over the last months.

"Okay, make a persuasion check for me."

"Why not deception?" Brian asked out of curiosity.

"Didn't actually tell a lie," she explained, as the dice rolled.

"Oh geez, my persuasion is crap," Ana was muttering, looking up to add, "Nine."

"The guard looks you up and down, and then over to the dog staring at him, and exchanges a look with his fellow guard. They don't seem to be buying this. I wasn't told we were getting a mabari."

"Must I point out the obvious?" Ana tried again, putting a growl into her voice that made Patrick blink in surprise. "I am a large, impatient man with a war dog. Either let us in, or get someone who will."

"Barkspawn growls in agreement with him," Patrick offered hopefully. "Teeth bared, muscles tensed. Looking like he really wants to rip someone's throat out."

"Uh, all right." Laughing, Erin shook her head. "Roll for intimidation, with advantage, since Barkspawn's helping you."

Again, the dice rolled, and Patrick let out a whoop of triumph as Ana grinned.

"I rolled a four, and a natural twenty, so twenty-six," she declared cheerfully, setting Brian and Toby to praising the roll enthusiastically.

"Well, you are a large, impatient man, fully armed, with a war dog, and these guys just don't get paid enough to deal with things like this," Erin told them. "I can't believe that worked ... They look to each other, and back to you, and step away hurriedly. Uh, all right. You, uh ... go inside, and wait in the room on the right there. We'll, um ... The captain'll come and see you. One of them pushes the door open and hurries inside, and the other gestures for you to follow him, while keeping as far away from the two of you as he possibly can while at the same time trying not to look scared. The one who went ahead of you gestures toward an antechamber to the right side, and hurries off to find the captain, leaving you both alone. What do you do?"

There was a moment of pause.

"Sten really doesn't like being kept waiting," Ana mused, eyeing Patrick thoughtfully. "This is pointless. We should go in fighting."

"Barkspawn barks back in agreement," Patrick answered. "I mean, we're inside now. It can't be that difficult to find the cells, right?"

"Oh my god, are you really going to do that?" Toby asked, incredulous disbelief written all over his smiling face. "You're just going to fight your way through a whole fort?"

"Sure, why not?" Ana shrugged, and looked over at Erin. "I draw my sword, and wait by the door for the captain to come in. When he does, I'm gonna swing at him."

"While Sten goes for his body, I'll pounce his legs and try to knock him prone," Patrick said, picking up his dice.

"All right then."

Erin couldn't quite believe that the admittedly bad plan to talk their way in had suddenly become the worse plan of fighting their way in, but that was D&D. Groping for her character stats sheets, she fumbled for the captain.

"You're left waiting for no more than a few minutes, enough time to get into position by the door, and the captain's footsteps make it very obvious when he's coming. You go as soon as he steps in through the doorway?"

"Yep, the second I see him." Ana rolled her dice, checking her own sheet as Patrick did the same. "Twenty-eight to hit?"

"That hits, roll damage. Patrick?"

"Twenty-five."

"Nice rolls - that hits as well." Erin glanced down at her sheet, rolling her own dice quickly to see if her NPC might be able to avoid either of these. "Actually, Barkspawn, roll a dexterity check for me quick to see if you can get him off his feet."

"Sixteen damage," Ana said, leaning forward hopefully.

"So, as the captain of the guard steps in through the doorway, Sten swings his massive greataxe, and it sinks into the captain's shoulder, crunching through plate armor and pressing chain-mail and cloth into quite a significant wound. Blood spurts out as he yells in pain, the sound echoing down the hallway he came from. Patrick, what did you get?"

"I rolled a seventeen on the dex, and a ... three damage." Patrick threw Brian a dirty look across the table as the other man laughed. "What? I only have teeth and claws!"

"Well, he rolled a four on his saving throw," Erin assured him, "so as Sten rips the axe out of this gaping, bleeding wound in the captain's shoulder, Barkspawn charges toward him, gripping one of his ankles in his vicious teeth and pulling hard. The captain staggers, and falls down hard. He is now prone."

"Do I get an attack of opportunity?" Ana asked hopefully. "Since, you know, he's gone from standing in front of me to lying on the floor."

"Technically ... no," Erin began to say, but she knew better than to force a technical point. What was the point of the game if it wasn’t fun? "But in this instance, why not? Roll another attack, with advantage because he's prone."

"Excellent."

"You're so blood-thirsty," Patrick commented over the sound of the dice rolls. "I love it."

"I'm a large, impatient man with a greataxe," Ana answered cheerfully. "Twenty-six again, and fourteen damage."

"As the guard captain falls, Sten takes another swing with his greataxe, and this time the blade sinks into the man's leg, blood flowing freely from this new wound as he screams in pain again. He's hurting, but he's not dead, and you can hear the sounds of other guards rushing toward the sound of his screams."

"I cast Polymorph on him while he's down," Patrick announced, one finger in the air as he scanned his spell sheet.

"What's the save on that?" Erin picked up her dice to roll.

"Uh, that is ... wait for it, wait for it ..." He peered at his sheet, scanning desperately for the appropriate number. "I really need to organize this - oh! Wisdom, fifteen!"

Erin rolled for the saving throw, and snorted with laughter.

"Natural three," she laughed, shaking her head again. "What are you turning him into?"

"A flea," her brother said firmly.

"Seriously?" Ana looked at him in astonishment. "You know he's just gonna bite you to all hell."

"Yeah, but I'm a dog," he pointed out. "What's another flea?"

To the sound of the laughter rising around the table, Erin tried to get control of the narrative again.

"All right. As the sound of the approaching guards gets louder, Barkspawn channels his druidic magic, and suddenly the guard captain is no longer visible. A moment later, you feel a sharp bite on the inside of your ear."

"I scratch that ear." Patrick grinned.

"Fair enough, okay. But as you look up, you see four more guards heading toward you, swords drawn, ready to fight."

Erin looked at Ana and Patrick with a slightly evil grin.

"Roll for initiative."

[snatcherwes]

OCtober 3rd: Feast

OCtober Challenge by @oc-growth-and-development!

Author’s notes: So this ended up being way longer than I intended but I didn’t feel happy with the set up until I fleshed it way out like I did so that’s how we ended up with 2,414 words. I’m actually not super upset with this one either even though I know it’s kinda rushed. I don’t love the ending but I needed to get it done and it’s not completely awful so /shrug. Anyway, here’s another Vitale and Luke piece. It’s much darker than the previous one and has a handful of warnings coming along with it. I take a lot of how I do my vampires from VTMB and Vampyr because they’re two of my all time favorite games so if you’ve played them, some things might seem familiar.

Warnings: There are mentions of blood and semi-detailed torture and death in this. It’s not too bad but it is about a vampire so proceed with caution if you’re easily squeamish!

Word count: 2,414

When Vitale finally came through, it was to a rush of cold water being poured over his head and a throaty chuckle ringing through his ears. He desperately gasped, shaking his head vigorously in an attempt to throw off the wash of cold clinging to him. Doing so gave him an intense bout of vertigo as his head began to throb. When he made the move to push back his sopping wet hair, he found that his arms were secured tightly behind his back with thick, heavy chains. The vampire frantically squirmed, achieving nothing but heavy nausea and throbbing aches. He defeatedly settled, allowing his eyes to finally adjust to the dimly lit view before him.

He was sat on the stone floor of what appeared to be a basement. His bindings were connected to a thick hook that had been drilled into the brick wall behind him. Beside him on either side were vacant sections of wall that served the same purpose as the one keeping him tethered. He tried to see further into the darkness of the basement but his exhaustion and nausea were doing a number on his vision and ability to focus on any more than his immediate surroundings. He could do little more than glance up at the man that he assumed was his captor.

“Wakey wakey, little tick,” the man spat, gripping Vitale by the chin with a calloused hand in order to lift the vampire’s head. “Have a good nap, did ya’?”

The man was somewhere around six feet tall and built like a brick wall. His broad shoulders and wide chest conveyed the strength that he had been using to all but crush Vitale’s jaw. He was littered in scars from head to toe and had appeared to have an improperly healed broken nose at one point in time. His appearance gave little indication as to what his abilities were, appearing outwardly like a human—albeit a strong one. That fact unsettled Vitale for he had no idea what he was up against.

When Vitale didn’t give an answer to the mocking question, the man shoved the vampire’s face down with a snarl, gruffly laughing when his prisoner struggled to right himself.

“C’mon, I know ya’ can speak,” the man said, roughly nudging VItale in the side with a heavy boot. 

Again, the vampire remained quiet, trying to call upon any memories that would shine light on where he was and why. He vaguely remembered gearing up and preparing for something that night, failing to remember what exactly it was. There was an agitating feeling of anxiety attached to a specific factor that he couldn’t quite recall, something he knew he needed to remember above all else. 

With a harsher kick to his side delivered by his captor, Vitale felt a searing pain that traveled up his spine to the nape of his neck, causing him to cry out and double over. 

“Aw, did that hurt?” The man let out another throaty chuckle, kneeling down to mockingly pat Vitale on the shoulder. “Amazing what a silver-tipped stake to the back can do to a little tick like yourself.” Vitale shivered, attempting to right himself once more and squirm away from the man’s heavy hand. Silver-tipped stake? 

With that, his memories began to return. He had been out on what was supposed to be a simple recon mission of a recently developed Resistance outpost. There was supposed to only be a small presence of guards and the surveillance was to be done at a distance. Vitale had positioned himself at the southern side of the outpost, observing a handful of guards file in and out of the building, unloading various supplies from vehicles parked just outside the gate. This went on for almost three hours with no issue whatsoever and he was ready to call it a night, return to base, and begin formulating a future course of action. However, as he stood from his concealed position, he remembered feeling an intensely sharp pain ripping through his spine and a rough hand quickly covering his mouth, silencing his scream. He wished that he had the foresight to bite the hand, but it would not have made much difference considering that the pain had caused him to pass out shortly after. 

Without warning, the man suddenly yanked Vitale to his feet by the chain binding his arms. He appeared to have unhooked the vampire from the fastener on the wall and intended to move him. With a shove, he lead Vitale through the basement and towards a set of stairs, up through a door and out into a yard. He tried to count just how many different guards he passed on his way out, but it became increasingly difficult with each step. 

Being forced to walk led Vitale to realize just how exhausted he was. He had no way to tell how long he’d been held captive; therefore, he had no way to tell just how much time had passed since he last fed. Clearly, it was enough to render him close to useless considering how his eyelids felt impossibly heavy and he needed to be up-righted several times on the journey up the stairs and out to the yard. 

“Since ya’ don’t wanna’ talk and I’ve got little patience tonight,” the man spoke, bringing Vitale around the building to a smaller portion of the yard serving as an alleyway. “I’ve got another idea.”

Vitale vaguely noticed a motionless mass laying in the dirt before him, surrounded by a handful of guards, but before he could figure out just what it was, a swift kick to the back of his knees sent him down onto the dirt. He could do little but lift his head, willing his eyes to focus on the mass before him. 

It looked as though a large, dirty blanket had been draped over the figure’s body, completely stretched out on the sides and pinned into the dirt with spikes. He could faintly hear labored breathing that matched the rhythm of the figure’s visibly shallow breaths. 

It became very clear all too fast just exactly who the figure was when Vitale’s captor gripped the mop of filthy blond hair atop its head and yanked upwards. “Look familiar?” 

Vitale met painfully familiar honey-colored eyes, his focus sharpening immediately as he recognized the figure to be Luke. He was on his stomach, his arms barely visible beneath the blanket. His face was bruised and beat, his left eye swollen and his lips speckled with blood. He looked absolutely filthy, as if he had been left in the dirt for days. A strained whimper fell from Luke’s lips as the hand gripping his hair yanked again before letting his head fall back to the ground. 

“Unlucky for him, he woke up first,” the man explained, standing up and circling the blanket atop Luke. When he began to drive one of the spikes deeper into the dirt, Luke let out a pained shout and Vitale quickly realized that it wasn’t a blanket covering his friend. Those were his wings. 

Vitale started to thrash at the realization, trying and failing to free himself from the chains binding him. Trying to free himself so that he could free Luke. Trying to do anything to make it possible to help his friend. “Stop!”

Turning his head to glance at the vampire, the man laughed. “That wasn’t so hard, was it? And to think, we had to pin this one here like a bug to even get a sound from ‘im.” 

“Please, stop,” Vitale pleaded, keeping his gaze glued to his friend. He could feel desperation swelling up inside of him, his gut burning from having not fed and anger for his tortured friend. His teeth chattered and he swallowed hard, his throat painfully dry as he croaked, “What do you want?”

“Oh, now ya’ wanna’ play, huh?” The man smirked, reaching down to pluck a feather from Luke’s wings. The Shape Shifter flinched as he felt the man’s fingers grip the quill and tug. “I think I’m having more fun with this.”

Again, the man knelt down further to Luke’s level, placing his hand atop the spike he recently pushed deeper. Vitale started to thrash again, struggling even harder to free himself, causing one of the lingering guards to hold the chains secure. 

“Aw, ain’t that cute,” the man snickered, directing the question to Luke as he knelt further to meet his eyes. When Luke responded by weakly spitting blood in his direction, the man growled, straightened up and roughly yanked the spike, causing it to tear further through the wing. 

Luke let out a terrible scream and it was becoming increasingly difficult for the guard restraining Vitale to still him. Their captor took notice, abandoning his torture of Luke to momentarily assist the guard. With a swift kick to the side of his head, Vitale went down hard and stilled completely, appearing to be knocked unconscious by the blow. 

Luke gasped, immediately starting to visibly panic but being able to do little more than weakly flail in the dirt. The man chuckled at his handiwork, turning his attention back to Luke. “Well, that’s that.”

When the fear and panic in Luke’s face was quickly replaced with confusion, the man mirrored it and followed his line of sight back to the vampire. “Still with us then?”

Vitale began to stir and tremble, almost convulsing in the dirt as the man that had been previously holding him readied to grab the chains once more. The vampire’s eyes shot open and there was little time for anyone to react before he snarled loudly, bearing a mouth full of shark-like teeth and snapped the chains binding him with little more than a stretch of his arms. He quickly got to his feet and wasted little time in tearing the terrifyingly sharp claws that once were his hands through the stomach of the man who attempted to restrain him. 

He turned his attention onto the main captor with frightening speed, his previously normal black irises replaced with blood red, the pitch black sclera unsettlingly highlighting them. The number of teeth in his mouth seemed impossible, all sharpened to a dangerous point. The blood of the man writhing at his feet dripped from his claws onto the dirt and the smell of it plus the fear in the air was driving him further into his frenzy.

“You’re fucked,” Luke mumbled with a pained laugh. Before their captor could even bark out a command to his men, Vitale was at his throat, burying his fangs into skin and pinning him still with claws deep in his arms. As he drained the man, Vitale payed little mind to the bullets that began pelting him as the remaining men covered him with panicked gunfire. 

The blood pleasantly coursed through him, and when he could feel the man’s heart settle almost to a complete stop, he tore himself from his throat and watched his unfocused eyes shift into panic as the last of his energy withered away. Dropping the limp body to the dirt, he turned his attention towards the closet guard and repeated the monstrous process.

Vitale tore through the small militia with ease, his heightened senses and drive for blood making him virtually unstoppable. If he was of the mind to laugh, he would have as the remaining guards pumped out bullet after bullet, trying and failing to do as much as slow him down. However, it was impossible. A frenzied vampire was an incredibly fast, extremely strong, and immeasurably dangerous creature, ferocious and merciless. Not only had the lack of blood driven Vitale over the edge, but the fear and helplessness of seeing his friend tortured plus having taken his own beatings eventually awoken the sleeping beast inside him. 

It wasn’t long until the entire yard was littered with the bloodless bodies of numerous Resistance guards. Vitale could feel himself winding down from his ravenous feast, slowly regaining his control as he ripped the throat out of the final guard attempting to stop him. Some had managed to flee the massacre and the outpost entirely and lucky for them, the vampire’s main concern was his still-pinned friend. They could be found later.

“Remind me not to piss you off,” were Luke’s first words to his friend as he knelt down to the first wing. Vitale didn’t respond, quickly meeting Luke’s gaze as he gently gripped the spike. The Shape Shifter nodded and braced himself for the pain, hissing loudly as the metal was pulled free. Instinctively, Luke drew his wing closer to his body, moaning in pain as it refused to fold properly.

“I’m sorry,” Vitale mumbled quietly, dropping the bloodied spike before moving along to the other wing. This one posed a bigger challenge due to how deep it was driven into the dirt but after a moment, the vampire finally tore it free, wincing at Luke’s pained shout. He apologized again as he tried to help fold the wing back. It wouldn’t budge and Luke’s grunts of pain sounded too awful to his ears to continue any further. Instead, Vitale helped Luke to his feet, holding him steady as his torn wings threatened to tilt him over like dead weight. “I’m so sorry for all of this, I—”

“Stop, just...” Luke interrupted, sighing and shaking his head as he trailed off. He then suddenly pulled Vitale into a weak but undeniably emotional hug, not caring about the blood or dirt caking them both. He squeezed the vampire as tight as he could, resting his head on Vitale’s shoulder. “Just get us home, Vitti.”

And that he could do. There was a lot to be said between the two, unnecessary apologies and tears shed over just how worried they had both felt, but all of that would be saved for after they were cleaned and patched up. That didn’t stop the both of them from worrying over each other profusely on the way back, Vitale insisting he carry Luke after having to stop to rest several times along the journey back and Luke declined each time, citing that Vitale had taken a harsh beating himself and needed to keep what little strength he had left. 

“I will have plenty of time to regain my strength once we get back because I can guarantee you that Terion will not let either of us set foot outside the base for at least a month.”

[curspect]

My Tragic Aromantic Romantic Backstory

like I like the *idea of romance I guess but when applied to my own Self it’s like Nah Bruv....,

Ive always been good at making friends. Not to toot my own horn or anything but Toot Toot: I’m funny, im a little weird, I’m good for hanging out with,, etc.

Me in in elementary school not understanding the Crush Drama™️ and people ask me who my crush is and I’m like “I don’t have one.” And it’s funny, because in this stage of my life people actually believed me when I said “I don’t like-like anyone.” And none of my kiddo classmates were worried about me going after their boy/girl and I chilled pretty well with both sides of the gender divide

one time in summer camp this kid got infatuated with me and I liked them but like, as a friend who is fun to talk about Inuyasha with, and play Capture the Flag. but this romance thing was all uncomfortable and like shit bruv. I’ve seen TV and I know what you want this to be but it’s not really my Thing, yunno? I think I broke that kids heart a little that summer

I remember in high school when some kid asked me out and I was like eh.. well he’s fun to hang out with in band class I guess, so we went on a date and he kept sending me messages on Facebook whenever I logged on but like I was not Feeling The Love Tonight and when I told him I’d never really liked anyone before he was like “uh what does that mean” and I’m like “I meant what I said” and we also went to prom together as Friends but this relationship was all around an uneasy feeling of “man I think I’m gonna hurt this person cuz I don’t feel what he feels” so I made good and fucking sure I kept him at arms length and our friendship kind of dissolved because of it

And in college I was vascillating wildly between “not my problem, I don’t care about romance” and “am I going to die alone? am I getting the College Experience™️ if I’m not dating and drinking and fucking?? am I capable of love???” And when college was over and I was moving back home it felt like my heart was shattered from the close friendships I knew would break off.

And like a year after college one of my closest friends who I actually kept in touch with... I like confessed to her because surely this was the love people always talked about? we texted “I love you” to each other every night (even though I felt a twinge if Unease each time) but I was determined. This had to be It. After all, I loved her so much and missed her so much. And when she moved out to come live where I was so we could be together I was like Fuck and .... frankly. It was nightmarish. She was SO in love with me and as time wore on it became increasingly apparent to me that I had been wrong after all. I wasn’t able to return her love the way she wanted it. It was torture. I loved her as much as I’d loved anyone but somehow it was not enough. I couldn’t talk to her about it because she was so In love with me and also the type of person who was always looking for loving affirmation, and even when I tried to be like “I love you as much as I can”, and she tried to accept that, but it was. Bad. I broke up with her and we haven’t talked since.

It fucking sucks that romance is so pervasive it feels like it HAS to be the fundamental truth. I swear tho, if I ever have some kind of relationship again I’m Fully Frontal about my ~broken ass cold ass heart~ so they know what they’re getting into.

But it’s also stupid because I’m full of love and companionship and joy. I’m full of humanity and humor. it shouldn’t be so painful to be who I am

[everythingislegalinsantafe]

Cherry On Top (Poly!Hamilsquad x Reader)

a/n: the ending is cheesy im so sorry 

requests: Poly!Hamilsquad with an insecure s/o who they keep ignoring (exhausted, too busy with work, etc) so s/o just starts going out late and hanging with some questionable people to forget about their loneliness. I need more hamilsquad angst pls

Can you do a poly hamilsquad × reader where the reader is super duper shy and really insecure but then the squad just kind of waltzes into her life and refuses to leave please?

word count: 3,017 words

Being a waiter and being extremely shy made it difficult for you to work sometimes. You’re always afraid to speak up loudly whenever asking people for their orders and would always internally freak out whenever they told you the order is wrong, but other than that you were very good at your job. You never had any bad experiences, except a few awkward ones, until a group of men came barging through the restaurant one day, talking and laughing loudly which caused many looks of distaste to come their way. Each one were gorgeous in their own way, but they were still being very annoying.

The man you first spotted was the tallest of the bunch, with dark curly hair tied up in a bun and a neatly trimmed beard. The next man was slightly shorter than the first but definitely stronger as you noticed his broad shoulders. The third man had curly hair like the tallest man, but it was tied in a ponytail to show off his freckled face. The last man was the shortest and had straight hair slicked back in a ponytail. He also seemed to be ranting about something while the other men looked at him amused.

You were taking orders from a young couple when they decided to walk in and you almost dropped your pen at the sudden noise. You grumbled and kept glaring at them over you shoulder while still trying to maintain a cheerful face for the couple. The hostess at the front desk tried to unsuccessfully calm them down as she led them to their seats which, unfortunately for you, was in your section. This caused a sense of panic to overwhelm you.

Usually when rowdy boys came into the restaurant they almost always either:

a) made fun of the waiter

b) flirt with the waiter

c) ignore the waiter until absolutely necessary

You didn’t mind the last one, but usually they gave little to the no tip stating you weren’t an ‘avid server’.  With this group you were praying for the last one as you cautiously walked up to their table while gripping you pen behind your back. They didn’t notice you yet as they were staring at the menu or laughing with each other.

“H-hi, I’m (Y/N) and I’ll be your server for tonight. Can I g-get you guys anything to drink?” You stammered.

Suddenly all the boys stopped talking as they looked up from the menus to stare at you. You started fidgeting nervously at the silence and you took a deep breath to calm yourself down as you looked down at your shoes.

Finally after what felt like hours of torture, one of them spoke up.

“I’ll have a lemonade.” The tall man said which you quickly noticed his French accent.

“I’ll have a diet coke,” said the stronger looking man. “And he’ll have a water to cool him down.” He pointed with a laugh to the shortest man of the group who seemed red with rage.

You looked at the freckled man, “A-and what are you having?”

He didn’t answer and just stared at you oddly while his head was propped by his elbow and tilted to the side. You shifted and started to shake under his stare.

“Laurens!” One of the men yelled.

“Oh sorry! I’ll have a sprite.” He said with a bright grin and a wink.

You blushed slightly and looked down to write down their orders and quickly walked away. Your face turned even more red as you heard them quietly whispering and you just knew they were talking about you.

You grabbed their drinks, but you tried to take a bit longer than usual so you wouldn’t have to face them yet. You shakily walked up to them as you balanced the drinks in your hand and handed them to each of their owners. You noticed as soon as you walked up their whispering stopped which further confirmed that they were indeed talking about you, or most likely in this case, making fun of you. You took out your pencil and paper to quietly asked if they were ready to order.

Throughout the entire time while you served them, they would always do the same thing.

Whisper once you walked away, stop when you came back, stare at you while asking if they needed anything else, repeat.

You tried to keep it together and not cry or become visibly upset in front of your other tables and the group of gorgeous men who caused the problem, but it was becoming increasingly difficult as the night progressed.

Finally, you gave them the check which meant they were leaving soon and so were you since your shift ends in ten minutes. Afterwards, you clocked out and walked outside to see it was pouring. You ran to your car and sighed as you were enveloped in warmth. You were about to drive away when you heard people arguing outside the restaurant.

You turned and saw it was the group of men from before, arguing about how they should get home. You realized they walked here and would most likely have to walk back in this weather.

You sat in your car and debated with yourself. You wanted to offer them a ride but would they think that’s weird? Would it be awkward in the car? Would they make fun of you if you asked?

You decided to just do it and you took a deep breath as you approached them.

“H-hi, I overheard you saying you would probably have to walk h-home and I wanted to ask if you would like a ride?”

The men stopped and stared at you and you immediately regretted your decision and back pedaled.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t want to seem weird especially since I was just your server but I felt bad for you guys an-an-and I’m sorry.” You blurted out as you covered your face with the sleeves of your jacket.

“Woah it’s ok! We were just surprised!” The short man explained. “We would be so glad if you gave us a ride. Y'see it was drier earlier and we decided to just walk and we didn’t know it was gonna rain and we were so hungry and-”

“Alex, shut up,” The stronger man glared teasingly and then smiled at you. “I’m Hercules, that’s John but we call him Laurens,” He pointed to the freckled man. “That’s Lafayette,” He nodded to the French man. “And this little guy is Alex.” He said as he wrapped the shorter man for a hug as Alex rolled his eyes.

“Your name is (Y/N), right?” John asked.

You nodded and tucked some of your hair behind your ear.

“We can’t thank you enough, mon ami,” Lafayette smiled as you led them to your car. “We will repay the favor somehow.”

You quickly blushed and told him it wasn’t necessary, but all the boys protested.

“C'mon (Y/N) you totally could’ve let us walk home and die in the rain.” John moaned.

You quickly tried to change the subject, “S-so what were you guys doing out and about? Were you just hanging out?”

Alex piped up, “It was date night for us.”

A beat passed when the dots connected in your head that they were all dating each other, “O-oh that’s nice! I h-hope you all had fun.”

They all grinned brightly at you when you didn’t seem disturbed by their relationship.

“It was wonderful, mon ami.” Lafayette grinned at you.

For the rest of the car ride the boys made jokes and asked about you, which you would shyly reply. You were fine with answering them until John asked if you were dating anyone.

You blushed and tried to spit out a reply until you noticed your GPS said you arrived.

“We’re here!” You exclaimed as you parked in front of their apartment building. Luckily on the drive over here, the rain stopped and fell into a light drizzle.

“Thanks (Y/n)! You’re the best!” John yelled as he ran inside hand in hand with Alex. Hercules gave you a wave before he walked inside, not minding the sprinkle of rain too much. You gave him a smile but turned to see Lafayette still in the back seat.

“Ah, (Y/N)! I was wondering if you would like to accompany us to lunch tomorrow? Since you were so kind enough to give us a ride in this terrible weather.” Lafayette asked.

You blushed and started to sputter, “ I t-told you really don’t have to! I-I mean I couldn’t just l-let you guys w-walk in the rain.” You ducked your head down. “It’s ok, Lafayette.”

Lafayette rolled his eyes, “(Y/N), I insist. Please come to lunch with us, we would love to see you again.”

You nodded shyly and gave him your number. He hugged you and gave a kiss on your cheek before he left the car, “See you tomorrow, (Y/N!)”

Ever since after that day the boys have never left you side. You were at their apartment more than your own and you never had a dull moment with them. Being around the boys helped you come out of your shell. You were still shy, but they helped you feel less insecure about yourself since they always gave you the sweetest compliments. There was only one downside to all of this however, you fell in love with not just one or two of them. Oh no, you fell completely in love with all of them.

Each boy was so different and unique and treated you so kindly that you couldn’t help it. They would give you so much attention and love that you felt like you were in their relationship too, but that wasn’t the case.

Lately, however, the boys have been ignoring you. At first you thought it was because they were too busy with their jobs, but they would still go out with each other and not with you. Your movie nights and sleepovers were cancelled over and over again and you couldn’t remember the last time you actually talked to one of them without them sounding disinterested.

You believed they were getting bored of you, which brought back your insecurities and shyness in full force. You never went outside anymore, only if you absolutely had to, and you completely stopped talking to the boys. Ever since you started ignoring them, they tried to contact you anyway possible, which both angered and upset you.

It’s alright if they ignore me but once I do it back it’s not alright? You would think angrily at night. Who do they think they are?

But then your mind would turn back around with a new thought.

They never liked you. They pitied you, idiot. Your brain would yell at you. You were only around for attention and nothing else.

Since you were so shy, the only friends you had were your coworkers and the boys. You never hung out with any of your coworkers, but you got along well with a couple of them and today you decided to stop mourning and go out for once. You were finishing getting ready when you got a text.

jmads: (1:28 PM)

u almost ready? im outside

You quickly slipped on your shoes and grabbed your belongings before locking the door. You waved when you saw James but stopped slightly when you saw another person who you did not know.

“Hey (Y/N), I know we were suppose to get some food together but Thomas here asked if he could tag along.” James asked.

You waved shyly at Thomas and he smirked. He didn’t give you the best vibes, but if James was friends with him he couldn’t be too bad.

The three of you walked down the street and came up to the little café that you always loved. You were about to sit next to James when Thomas wrapped an arm around your shoulder.

“Come sit by me, (Y/N). I don’t bite…much.” He grinned mischievously.

He plopped you down right next to him, a little to close if you were asked, and kept his arm around you. You tried to talk to James more, but he just kept asking you questions to “get to know you better”.

“Y'know,” Thomas said as he scooched closer. “Madison never told me how gorgeous you are.”

You tried to move away but he held you close to his side.

“But I have heard it from Lafayette.”

You head snapped up and froze, “H-how do you know Lafayette?”

“Oh now you wanna talk,” He chuckled. “Me and Lafayette go way back, darlin’ but enough about me. Lafayette used to talk to me all the time about you. How him and his boyfriends love ya to death.”

The more he talked the more you started to fidget. You knew somehow this was leading to something bad.

“Y-yeah, I’m good friends with a-all of them.” You played with the hem of your shirt.

“But they ignore you now don’t they, sweetheart?”

Your eyes went wide and you tensed up, surprised and shocked that he knew such a thing.

“I bet that hurt you. Didn’t it, darlin’? Aren’t you upset with them?” He asked with a fake pout, mocking you.

“Thomas that’s enough, not now.” You heard James warn as he looked over at another table, but Thomas ignored him and kept going.

“I bet you’re looking for someone to patch that hole up. Someone who could make you happy.”

You looked up at him with tears in your eyes and nodded. Thomas got closer and cupped your face.

“I can be that person, (Y/N)”

It looked like he was about to kiss you until…

“(Y/N), what the hell?” Someone yelled and grabbed your arm for you to get away from Thomas.

You looked up and saw Alex glaring at you, red in the face with John behind you looking defeated.

“Why were you with Jefferson? And why was he getting all close to you? How do you know each other?” He yelled at you while you stood frozen on the spot. “Never mind all the we’re going home. Goodbye Jefferson!” Alex taunted.

He barged out of the café while John held onto you. You looked at him confused and wanting answers, but he just shook his head and told you to wait until you got back to their apartment.

You sat in the car in tense silence, with Alex fuming in the driver’s seat while John looked dejected out the window. Nobody spoke all the way to their apartment.

As you walked into the door of their apartment behind Alex and John, the memories of being with them, being left alone, and what just happened all flooded into your mind. You heard Alex yell angrily for Laf and Herc while you were still reminiscing and you soon started to sob.

“(Y/N)? Ma chérie, what happened?” Laf questioned as he came out of the bedroom. He and Hercules were about to hug you when Alex interrupted.

“Don’t hug them! They were getting all cuddly with Jefferson earlier,” Alex screeched. “Plus they’ve been ignoring us!”

You suddenly stopped crying and tensed up. You were ignoring them?  

YOU were ignoring THEM?

Your self control shut down.

“EXCUSE ME?” You yelled as the boys flinched. “Last time I fucking checked you four were ignoring me! I was trying to contact and hang out with you guys and I barely ever got a hello from any of you! I thought at first you were busy with work but then I would see you all getting breakfast or some shit!”

The boys stared at you, frightened, as they never heard you yell that loudly or curse.

“And to put the cherry on the mcfucking top, once I decided to ignore you, next thing I’m getting texts out of nowhere! Asking me to hang out! How fucking hypocritical! I’m not some little toy where you can tell me when you want me and when you don’t!” You were so angry tears started to fall from your eyes as you screamed.

“So,” You whimpered softly, a drastic difference from just a moment ago. “Why were you ignoring me?”

The boys’ faces softened as they saw your tears. They looked at each other before Hercules spoke up.

“We were…trying to plan on how to ask to join our relationship.” He said softly as he stepped closer to you.

“You…what?” You asked as you tried to dry your eyes.

Hercules and Laf enveloped you in a hug, “We really like you, ma chérie. We just couldn’t think of how to ask you and we were so busy that we didn’t even notice that we weren’t paying enough attention to you.” Laf snuggled his face into your hair.

You giggled, “R-really?”

“God (Y/N) we were making it so obvious,” John stepped into the hug. “We absolutely adore you and would do anything for you."

You looked over at Alex, who looked absolutely heartbroken and for once in his life, speechless.

“I-I’m so sorry, (Y/N) I didn’t know you were so lonely and I d-didn’t mean to make you cry it’s just that,” He took a deep breath. “We care about you so so much and we were so afraid to fuck up our friendship with you if we asked you out and t-then you ignored us and it broke our god damn hearts.”

Your heart was breaking at seeing Alex like this. You wanted to pull him into the hug, but you knew he had more to say.

“A-and then I saw you with Jefferson and I just couldn’t take it an-an-and, God we just love you.”

He fell into your embrace as the five of you hugged and you were so happy you started crying again.

“(Y/N), baby, what’s wrong?” John cupped your face.

You shook your head and looked at each of your boys, “I love you all too. And I would be honored to join your relationship.”

All of them cheered as you felt your face become buried in kisses and you knew you would never be ignored again.

[tumblunni]

oreshika: you know who is not the bad guy? the bad guy also oreshika: you know who is actually the secret bad guy? this sweet harmless comic relief man who has done nothing wrong

except like its eight glowing brain levels deeper cos the sweet comic relief man is also a giant obviously evil demon mask that ANYONE could have pinned for “really just possessing this dude” since the very start but then his personality was very non bad and he was all ‘hey buddie why u no smile’ to his host and like I LET MY GUARD DOWN OKAY. I LEARNED TO TRUST AGAIN.

i’m at the final battle and I am so pissed off but also HYPED?? like im relaly mad cos like RIGHT FROM HIS FIRST APPEARANCE I was like ‘dear god please don’t make onigashira the real villain, it would be so fucking obvious’ and then i just got progressively more pissed because he literally did nothing evil in the entire damn plot, he’s just evil because Evil he’s some sort of Magical Evil Mask that was Made To Be Evil and like Unquestionably Is That and no sort of interesting exploration on that plot even though he HASNT ACTED EVIL EVER UNTIL THE LITERAL LAST FIVE MINUTES

and it raises SO MANY questions cos like why was he even cooperating with Seimei then?? why didnt he fully posess seimei at any earlier point?? why didnt he kill nueko at any of the five other mandatory boss fights we had with him?? Seimei at least had an intriguing personality that gave an odd justification for his plot laziness. Cos he’s an anti-villain who weirdly sees you all as friends or a mentor/student thing, and he’s really just pretending to be evil so that you’ll kill him, cos he can’t die and desperately wants to. So it makes sense that he doesnt do any of his evil actions until you arrive, cos the whole damn point was just to taunt you into arriving. And its nicely parodied cos he literally sends you tea party invitations to his latest evil plan and gets pissed off if you miss it XD i’m so sad for seimei plz say (mei) that we adopt him afterwards i wanted to adopt onigashira afterwards back when it looked like he was the not evil one of the pair I AM STILL REALLY SALTY THAT HE’S NOT!!!! HIS DESIGN IS REALLY COOL AND CUTE!!!!! AND HE WAS A COMIC RELIEF OLD MAN DEMON DRAGON DOOD!!! i trusted u

okay but to talk about why i am also HYPE i need to go into some endgame spoilers whoopy doop!

so yeah the twist of ‘evilman is actually just being controlled by his puppet dragon thing’ was WAY OBVIOUS and i was really wishing for it to not happen but they made up for it by having ANOTHER TWIST THAT’S WAY BETTER

random description of something else from the endgame that is cool but i dont really know where to fit it into this conversation lol you actually do get to fight Final Boss Seimei here, its a cool boss rush with him and then Super Onigashira Betrayal Mode but what I really like is that its an OPTIONAL boss rush! the first time you play it you fight seimei with his freaky spider legs superform, and then nueko steals it back cos it was hers first. Can i just say again that I love a sexy mom styled heroine who’s powers are entirely around growing friggin monsters out of her arms and stuff? Seriously way to subvert that fanservice bro! (its still a bit cringey when they show the monster tattoos being drawn on her butt and boobs...) so then you go into the second fight and your health has all been healed and now one party member has a new supermove (I was really pissed cos it didnt restore your MP and TP, so I couldnt use that move!) But then if you lose and come back it actually skips the first fight and has an altered cutscene that’s like ‘oh, you’re back for round two?’ and such. MUCH preferrable to stuff like kingdom hearts where i have to watch a damn ten minute cutscene each time! Tho I do wish there was an option to redo it in boss rush mode, I guess that’s just a reward for people who can get it on the first try. I’m prepared now thooooo... :(

OKAY BACK ON TOPIC

Now for this final arc of the story we’ve been investigating the mystery of the Nameless God, some dude in the past who was apparantly super great and then got erased from history. There’s also the mystery of who exactly was Nueko’s husband and what happened to separate her from Seimei and make him turn evil, tho i mean its PRETTY OBVIOUS his dad was this mystery god lol And even though its not really very much of a twist about his identity, its still really interesting how the whole thing is handled. Him being erased from history means that none of the characters can remember his name or face, but NEITHER CAN THE PLAYER! He appears in the interfaces long before the plot actually talks about him, as a silhouette and a name smudged out by ink.

Now the actually cool twist about him is that like.. we’ve been hearing for AGES about how great he was, and how someone must have put out a hit on him or something. And him being in the interface seems like a spoiler that he’s gonna be unlockable later as a godly husband candidate for your protagonists. And even when we see npc optional boss battle gods hating on him, it’s always the jerkass gods who have some sort of reason to be biased. Or (in retrospect) they’re hating him for entirely the wrong reasons based on other people’s flawed gossip about him. “He was too kind and if he made equality then I wouldn’t be rich!” says genericman mc gee, who is probably eighty times less evil than this man

COS THATS THE TWIST

He was an evil fucker and erased himself from history with essentially an alchemy equivelant of a mad science experiment gone wrong. And what happened with Nueko and Seimei was that evilbad mc trashdad tried to use his damn four year old child as raw materials for this experiment, and she tried and failed to save him. And then she was desperate and her only option left was to kill the kid so he couldnt be tortured like that, and then killed herself too from grief. But it all went horribly wrong because she didn’t know that the reason Seimei was a candidate for this experiment is because he had immortality powers as a half human half god. So the poor kid survived watching his mom stab him and then slit her own throat, and he had no clue it was because his dad was gonna kill him anyway, so he grows up hating her and missing her and being this big ol sad mess that’s easily manipulated by a fucko father...

COS THATS ALSO THE TWIST

ONIGASHIRA WAS DADS

WHAT HOW

DADS

And like if they were gonna reveal his entire funny cute sidekick personality to be completely false then I’m glad at least his real personality was Twisty Wow and Immensely Punchable like i still feel like i could never punch a cute puppet pal but i can surely punch an abusive father pretending to be his own son’s imaginary friend for twenty years and whispering bullshit in his ear just to drive him into his own grave and like POOR SEIMEI WANTED TO DIE JUST NOT LIKE THIS NOT LIKE THIIIIIIIISSSS

i still think that ‘hey i was made to be an evil superweapon demon dragon mask thing but i became sentient and decided to be a happy hugs jokeman’ would have been a really amazing character concept too either that or ‘hey it really is a harmless normal mask and i’m just super seriously angsty seimei doing ventriloquism as a hugs jokeman character because i’m lonely as fuck and please be my friend’ either of those would have been better than this but like if this is what we get then I’m at least glad they gave me good enough reason to feel ‘GAHH I WANNA STAB HIM AND SAVE MY NEW SON’ rather than just ‘oh blah this ending ruined my fave character, and i feel nothing towards anything now’

also his boss fight is really damn fuckin coolio wow like it was a HUGE WHOA MOMENT when the fight starts and his name is blanked out and you just instantly know who he was this whole time and your mind explodes that this guy was evil and then he’s like a giant buddha-esque multi armed dude doing sutra poses with a big ol spoopy demon head and then really fun classic gameplay of ‘him summon the many hands and u has to destroy the hands to get 2 him and then they regenerate after a short amount of time’ but he’s also got super hellish simultaneous buff and debuff powers and all sorts of other nasty tricks AND IM ON THE LOWEST DIFFICULTY GEEZ and like for some reason it really stabbed my heart seeing how just one of the many hands is still human, its like seimei’s still in there and maybe he might still be alive if we defeat this guy fast enough... and then the music is SO FUCKING GOOD and it has like three remixes for all his increasingly frantic stages. like he doenst actually have boss transformations for them, its just moveset changes and stat boosts as his health drops. but also the colours of the battlefield change and you get funky remix time so its still cool!

and then I was SO CLOSE, i had him down to 5% HP before he killed me T_T such a marathon boss and I was almost there... I’m really excited to try again tho! i finally got that damn curse off my inherited weapon from the first generation, and now i’m on generation 87, and now im ready to FUCK SOME SHIT UP! also my current party is all named after types of olives because i ran out of inspiration around character number 300 i am so fucking addicted to this grindy ass game!