#which is. NOT a good thing to do i am aware
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"Will you overthinking this?" He asked as we were walking hand in hand in the park.
Me, fully aware I have already started overthinking the moment he mentioned that her friend broke off her relationship: "....... juuup"
"What are you overthinking about? Lets discuss it together, let me help"... I explained how, maybe, now that she is single, she might try to get over a guy by getting under another one. Or maybe, since you guys tall about problems and are pretty close, she turns to flirting now that she is single. "Okay and? Why would I get into that while I have my girlfriend at home? I would say no thank you. Also, I don't think she is the person to do that. I have met her before she was in a relationship, and she also wasn't like this then". Okay, well, .. maybe she will have heard bad things about me and will not like me or she will think I am not good enough for you, or too much, and tell you to break up with me. I mean, I'm in a relationship with you, not with her, but ja, well... He put his arms around me and stopped us from walking on, hugging me from behind. "Sometimes I forget how insecure you can be. Do you really think I'll just break up with you because someone tells me to? And besides, I think you should meet her. She is really kind and everytime I mentioned something, she was always more on the reassuring side." Well, I also thought your other friend was kind.. "..... true. ..... I don't have an argument against that."
"So... if she were to still be in a relationship, would it be okay? .. meh, I feel like that's a bad excuse. "Yeah she is in a relationship anyway" , as if that changes anything. Doesn't that sound like a bad thing to you?" Hmm. Well. Honestly, I felt better when she was in a relationship, assuming it wasn't an u know who typa relationship. It's always a 2 people's decision. And that way, I am at least sure that one side is on the no side (as I said it out loud, I realized how fuckedup it sounded.) "Shouldn't you trust me to already be on the no side?" .... I should, yes. I just don't know what to make of the fact that you told me that you can't promise me that it won't happen again. "That was a year ago" .... "back then I wasn't super sure, and before that I was def not sure. Also, I did not want to force you to trust me (def different exact words from his, buthey, u get the point.). It's been a year." Would you get back to it and say something different now then? "Yes. I am sure that it will never happen again".
And there it was. I know he is a firm believer in actions over words, but sometimes I need words to be sure. He told me that he tells me the truth, and I know he does. Thus, if he tells me, I believe him. So. Maybe this is what I needed to truly get to trusting him again. His word. It's not a signed contract, I know. I can't sue him if his words turn out to be false. Though, I needed this. I needed his faith in himself to make sure it won't happen again. Fuck damn hey. I needed him to believe in himself. If he doesn't believe he will stop it the next time, who am I to believe so? Well well well. Before he left, if our roommate wasn't sitting right next to me, I would've said after he asked me if I'm still okay (for like, the 3th time): "if you say it won't happen again, I trust you." Fuck. And I'd mean it. I feel like I have entered a new reality. One in which it is safe for me to have faith in him. In which, sure, maybe a girl will flirt with him, but I can laugh about it. I can be proud to be with that hotstuff that she can't help but talk to. I can make jokes about it and raise my eyebrows up and down. I can do it all, and enjoy the situation, knowing. Truly knowing. That it doesn't matter at all if the other party is on the "yes-boat". He isn't, and he won't get onto it either. Even if a chance presents itself, he won't even see it as one. He has the set in stone plan to come back home to me. Even if she would get him drunk and touch him all over, ... he will say no. Even if it scares me more with booze, he is still himself. He doesn't get into a crazy trans and turns into a different person with different values. He is still the same person who held my hand as we walked in the autumn colored park, and said that it would never happen again.
It feels like something in me has been freed. As if trust was a fluffy creature within me, which was tied down. His words freed it. It still can't believe that the tiny trust guy is free. That it's safe to stand up now and run and smile and truly trust. It's astonished, grasping for those words that set it free. Wanting to hold them and craving for them to invade its veins with its lightning energy and brightness. May it no longer feel the need to stay on the ground; the ties have been undone. Fuck.
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“please don’t make me say it if you aren’t going to say it back” with a desperately in love with joel reader would hit so much…
weaved around your finger like yarn
a/n: me writing for joel again?? this has sat in my inbox for over a year and i never meant to actually take this long with it. but i finally figured out how to write this concept. and now i am actually obsessed with the small world of softness i created for these two. this is yes jackson joel, but nothing bad happens ever to him because why would it? it's all fine right?
summary: he never made space in his life for love in the aftermath of destruction. the after of his life he once thought would extend past decades of gray hair, smile lines carved in around his mouth now set in frowns and sneers. but snowfall and alcohol blur the lines for both of you when winter comes to jackson.
word count: 1.6k+
pairing: joel miller x reader
warnings: not explicit, love confessions, heavy makeout sessions, alcohol consumption, tipsy joel, sad joel, laughter at the end of the world, hope.
He can't remember laughing until his stomach hurt. The ache that spilled into his chest, warming his insides with a sun like quality that left him shivering. He can't recall the feel of his cheeks pulled so wide the sensation became a phantom pain seconds after. He knows it happened. He can distinctly recall the jokes, the joy. But the laughter lingers like a ghost at the back of his mind—translucent and gray and distorted enough to feel false.
Alcohol simmers in his stomach with a rueful intent. A malignant aftermath that would hit him in a few hours after two months of attempted sobriety. Ellie insisted, he accepted. Easy enough to say. Difficult to follow through with.
He had his days where whiskey sounded better than the flavor of bacon Tommy would bring him in the early mornings. But the dismay in your eyes helped him hold off, regain his awareness of a world not yet shattered. For once in quite a long time...he finally lived. For you, for Ellie, for Sarah.
He lived to see his hair grow longer and the grays appear more frequently. To drink coffee in the mornings on a porch you were already settled on. To help you fix small things here and there in your cabin next door. He lived for your smile, the light in your eyes. The curve of your lips as they pulled up into bolstering peals of laughter—the furrow in your brow as you frowned from endless frustrations on long hard days.
Joel Miller lived to love you.
He existed to dig his heels in and wait shit out—it's what he was good at, what he knew how to do. But for you he relented quicker than ice on a hot asphalt driveway back home in Texas. His mind became sand that slipped through your giving hands—heart a fluttering mess that sang a tune he could never get right on the guitar stashed in his living room.
Days bloomed into weeks which grew into months. Eventually a year passed and what used to be difficult and awkward to be around people again, felt like breathing the fresh winter air. The jackets he managed to find hung on hooks by the door, a pair of heavy boots beside the small table Tommy crafted him.
The mornings were nice. When hot water hit ground coffee and the aroma plagued his kitchen for hours at a time. The evenings called you towards him—simple cooking skills shared in the confines of a home he pined for you to reside in.
Life was a sliver of peace he never imagined he'd get again. But the hole in his heart never faded, the pain still rang out sharp enough to have him clamping down on the inside of his cheek. And your smile made his stomach ache with a longing deep enough to scar.
Tommy told him to buck up and do something. Ellie called him a fucking idiot.
You...gave no indication you felt the same way. So silent and reserved he would remain.
Your feet slid on icy, fingers gripping tightly to his jacket with a yelp in a quick attempt to save yourself from slamming to the ground. Joel snickered loud and brash and a wash of embarrassment burned under frozen cheeks. Dragging you up, his arm looped tightly around your waist—hand pressed harsh and insistent to the small of your back. You swallowed the butterflies at the sight of his face flushed red—eyes shining from the effect of too much whiskey.
"We were bad tonight," you muttered, breath forming a cloud between your faces.
He grinned—skin buzzing at the close proximity of your form. "Only a little bit."
"You're not supposed to drink Joel."
Leaning in he traded his smile like a secret; you tucked it into your chest with a sharp breath. "I won't tell if you don't, darlin'."
"Joel..."
"C'mon. No one's gettin' in trouble here."
A blade pierced your heart brutally—spilling crimson along pale white snow. Even as Joel remained entirely unaware of how you clung to him. How your body called his name—your mind plagued with thoughts of his being, with images of his smile, with the sound of his raspy voice. He'd never know the way you cherished each moment with him. The mornings tucked away from an unruly world—the nights shared between friends who might one day be more.
Your teeth scraped along the cracked skin of your bottom lip, eyes cast up to the curl of his lips. The words sprang forth faster than you could drag them back. Your chest of secrets unlocked and bared to the man who drowned you in his small flecks of joy. Later you'd blame the alcohol. When the headache ravaged your head and an ache lingered between your thighs.
Later you'd comb over every small glance and breathy word.
"I like spending time with you Joel," you breathed, fingers toying with the front of his leather coat. "I like...um..."
The breath caught in his throat, gaze desperate to catch yours. "Yeah sugar?"
"It's a hard thing to say." Another cloud of your whiskey tinged breath filled the air.
"You can tell me anythin'. You know that right?" Even as hope flared bright and scorching through the width of his chest. "I'll listen."
Hesitation spilled into the night, your voice a soft whisper he barely caught. "Please don't make me say it if you aren't going to say it back."
Oh didn't you know?
Did you not see how his gaze dug beneath the layers of flesh and bone, of tendons and veins that clung to your form? Did you not understand he would take a bullet for you? That he'd bear the wound of a warrior's death to keep you alive? How could you not know that his love stuck to his tongue with a saccharine bitterness he swallowed down like the drugs he once took to numb his mind?
You healed pieces of his soul you never broke. A marred and fucked puzzle that was meant to find a home six feet underground. By his own hand no less. He was destined to die—born to suffer—yet you swathed him wool with the promise of a peaceful life.
A future etched by the hands of love.
"Say it," he pleaded, frozen hand cupping your cheek.
"It's more than just that." The breath you took shot adrenaline down his spine. "I like our mornings. I like our dinners and conversation. And even when you come into town with me. But I...I love..."
The glossy nature of your eyes created by unshed tears that pooled at your waterline dug the knife deep enough to meld it within his heart. You didn't know. You couldn't have. His silence, his hesitation, swallowed every emotion he might have told you—every secret uttered in the shadows of night that told only half his story.
He told you about Sarah. About their life together, about her smile. That in itself felt like a proclamation of love—a key to the heart he thought stopped beating long ago.
"I knew it would freak you out," you muttered, pulling away from his hold.
Only for him to panic. His hand gripped the back of your jacket, pushing you towards him hard enough for your feet to slip again. But your gasp was swallowed by the cold press of his mouth to yours. Lips chapped by the winter air slid against your parted mouth as you froze against his chest. Your hands hung listlessly at your sides. He kissed you tenderly, attempting to wake you from the spell of shock, but to no avail did it bring you back.
"'M sorry." His words were muffled against your chin, forehead pressed to yours and eyes squeezed shut. "I shouldn't have–"
The press of your fingers into his cheeks jolted him back—eyes wide as you dragged him back with a stifled moan. Your mouth found his tongue hot and wet along his bottom lip in a pleading motion he complied to instantly. Stepping forward he fell into you with a deep groan. One that echoed and vibrated right down to your stomach—one you savored with a lick along his back teeth.
Hands cupped your ass with an insistent need to mold you closer, fingers digging into the plush flesh he longed to bite and taste. You tasted like whiskey. You smelled like him. It made him dizzy with want, anxious to lead you back to his porch—to seat you on his kitchen counter in the mornings while the coffee went cold.
"Fuck I wanna take ya home sugar," he grunted, biting at your lower lip with a grin.
Your breathless reply made the hair stand on the back of his neck. "You can."
"No." He shook his head, stealing another kiss with a gritty moan. "Not tonight. 'M gonna do this proper."
"Proper," you smiled, tugging on the longer curls you refused to let him cut. "You're such an old man Miller."
The large breadth of his hand cupped your chin, pushing the cheeks he lightly bit into together. "Won't be sayin' that tomorrow when I ain't got all this fuckin' alcohol in me."
"Yeah?" The droop of your eyelids—the darkened iris now filled with lust—set his teeth on edge. His body hummed with a new buzz he craved since meeting you. "Prove it."
"Oh I will." He grinned sharply, licking his teeth like a wolf waiting to pounce. "Don't you worry 'bout that."
A glimmer in your eyes caught his attention, the grip on your face loosening. "You know I love you right darlin'?"
You smiled—big and bright—and Joel felt another piece of his soul set back into place. "I love you too Joel."
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller fic#joel miller#pedrostories#my writing
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My thing about Veth potentially venturing into polyamory is that I do think everyone involved would be perfectly fine with it and happy to help her experiment, and I think that no matter how they do it, it would not fix her. This isn't to say that she wouldn't get any benefit out of trying! It's just to say that it's not a solution to her actual problem, because I genuinely don't think the problem is that she's lacking any one thing that would make her life complete.
Fundamentally, I think Veth struggles with the idea that there will come a point at which she has to settle. Not in a bad way, just in the sense that she is one person with one life and she will have to live within those bounds. Because the thing is, I don't really think her issue ends at struggling to "have it all"; to an extent she does! She is a good parent, even if her kid is a little rebellious; her marriage is supportive (and has fun sex); she gets to go off to save the world with Yeza's blessing on occasion, when the world needs saving. She doesn't have all of these things all the time, but... that's not really a flaw, that's just a fact of life.
But she started out her adult life settling to an extent—even if she loved Yeza and loved being Luc's mom, she did the safe thing that was expected of her. The goblin attack and everything that transpired after shoved her out of that life, but in retrospect, to an extent it likely feels that that pushed her to find something more that she wouldn't have had otherwise. Being pushed to her limit under the worst conditions made her better, stronger, braver, and at the end of it she found that she could have both her original life and much of her new life—so why wouldn't she then wonder if further experiences of that ilk could do the same?
Crucially, she has not actually run up against a hard limit yet, and as such she hasn't had reason to believe that there is a point at which she has to stop and recognize that there isn't more for her to find. When she was drinking more heavily during missions, even when it caused the death of herself or others, there were no long-term consequences. And the thing is, I'm not saying that she should face that kind of major consequence, but she seems as though she is scared to accept that maybe she could be happy if she stopped before she does.
I'm also not suggesting that she should stop experimenting or trying new things—the Luxon knows I am not one to talk in that realm—but I do think she is searching for novelty not because that would make her happy, but because she doesn't believe that she has the capacity to know what would make her happy. She was unaware that polyamory was even an option, so think of what else she might not be aware of! She doesn't have perfect knowledge of the world, after all, so how can she trust that she's found what she really wants? So yeah, she could fuck someone else, and it might even be an enjoyable experience that she didn't know was missing! But that only prolongs the question of what else she might be missing.
I think that deep down, she's terrified that if she doesn't keep pushing until that external hard limit, she will end up with regrets later, and simultaneously she is resentful that her friends all seem to have reached a point where they are largely content with what they have, because she wants them to have everything. She wants herself to have everything. And she has not yet allowed herself to come to terms with the fact that only she can determine when the everything of what she already has is enough, and anything else is the cherry on top.
#but also she should still try polyamory. because it'd be very funny.#I just think she should corner essek with a knife after sleeping with caleb like 'SURELY YOU WEREN'T ACTUALLY OKAY WITH THAT YOU LIAR'#(because she still feels guilty and unsatisfied and she couldn't possibly be the one keeping herself from being content. nosiree lmao.)#but in all seriousness hilariously I think she should talk to essek about it cuz I think he would actually relate most lmao#and he does seem to be doing well with it! like he's living within the bounds of what will keep him alive sure#but he's also doing so in such a way that's like#I can't have my cake and eat it too but I can be content eating the cake#like look. as an essek girlie. do you think I do not relate lmao. BUT the important point is that it really is up to you#you can do what you want forever! but you also have to live with that.#critical role#cr spoilers#cr meta#veth brenatto
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Shifting Success ♡
Last night before going to bed I did a meditation on youtube and felt pretty good about it. I had tried it once the night before and it gave me crazy dreams which I associate positively with shifting. Last night I had another crazy dream. At some point during the dream I became lucid, however because the dream was so scary I didn't want to try to shift through it so I just woke up instead.
Scary dreams tend to stay in my mind, but lucid dreams always make me feel really powerful so after lucid dreaming I decided I would shift. I was sort of half asleep at the time but felt very confident that I could do it, so I just decided I would, said so, and went back to sleep.
The bad thing is that I didn't really decide where I wanted to shift to and instead because I had been thinking about that bizzare dream I had just before I wound up becoming aware of this strange reality that was like sort of related to the dream that I had just had.
Because I had lucid dreamt just before shifting I can say with complete certainty that they are entirely different things. They felt so so different, my dreams can get pretty realistic too but it's not like actual living. However shifting very much is actually living. It was such an odd experience honestly.
I woke up and I knew that I was like actually awake and not just in a dream again. I was in a bedroom that I knew distinctly was mine but was nothing like my cr room. Two of my siblings were in the room and they were the same age as me which was super weird since in my cr we are all pretty scattered age wise.
Some of the things that really confirmed it for me were my memories, comfort, and perspective. When I looked around the room I remembered random things about the items in there just like I would in my cr. The best example was when I was talking to my siblings and gathering clothes to change out of my pajamas and I distinctly remember looking through the underwear drawer of all places and looking for one of those pairs with like the day of the week on it of all things.
The fact that I not only knew that I had those without ever seeing them but also that while I was looking my mind wandered to a memory of when I went shopping with my friends and we all thought it would be funny to buy those and so we did. My mind wandering like that is something that happens to me a lot in my cr but never in my dreams.
Another thing that really struck me was the perspective. Real life as we know it is lived through first person on a day to day basis. Often in my dreams the perspective will shift rather like a tv show or movie. I can't remember a dream that I have ever had, lucid or not, where the perspective didn't shift or things didn't distort oddly. But that didn't happen to me at all, it was all real and tangible and first person the whole time.
Anyway this is getting way too long but I hope it's helped someone. After almost five years of trying (i know crazy right) I have shifted. Was it to where I wanted? no. Did I decide to come back as soon as I recognized what was going on cause I got scared? yes! but I still did it. And now I know that I am capable, and that's all I really need.
#shiftblr#reality shifting#shifting community#shifting blog#shifters#desired reality#reality shifter#anti shifters dni#shifting motivation#shifting success#shifting realities#im so happy#this is so long#i hope this is motivating to others cause it is super motivating to me#after this i am permashifting out of here#not in a rush tho now that i know i can do it#ill go tonight I think#i did not reread this so i am sorry if its a mess lol#also i love the wiz omg
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If you'd allow me to be critical of arcane s2 for a bit, my biggest issue with the final battle is that if you analyze how things ended up the way they did you realize it's literally all Piltover's fault. Why did Ambessa manage to gain power within the city? Because Piltover eagerly embraced fascism rather than reckon with the oppression that caused Jinx and Zaun to strike back. Why did Ambessa team up with Singed? Because Piltover unjustly arrested half of Zaun which caused Singed to call on Warwick, alerting her to their existence. Why did Ambessa team up with Viktor and his army of robots? Because Piltover and Caitlyn led her right to them.
Piltover did everything wrong. Literally none of this is Zaun's fault and yet they're expected to 'be the bigger person' and team up with their oppressors against a common enemy-- who is only a threat because Piltover is so stupid and discriminatory that they fell into her trap.
Despite this, the Zaunites don't get the independence or liberation they craved. I wouldnt mind if this was commentary on how lower classes can do everything right and still get nothing. But it isn't because they don't even get scenes showing how they feel about any of these developments. They're not allowed to express thoughts or show agency.
The most egregious example is how Sevika ends up on the council. We know this is antithetical to her character since she despises Zaunites who roll over for Piltover, which is why she betrayed Vander to join Silco in the first place. I'm actually not opposed to this from a plot perspective because you can do something interesting with it. Was she backed into a corner or did she change her mind on how to achieve Zaunite liberation? Did Zaunites ask her to do it or did she volunteer herself? We never know because she doesn't even get a voiceline, not even a silent scene of her interacting with them. You can say "show don't tell" all you want, but they don't even show it.
I am aware that expecting the company behind League of Legends to be good at class commentary and sociopolitics is like losing chess to a dog. My expectations were low to begin with. However I didn't expect it to be this bad.
#the sevika treatment was just terrible im so sorry they did this to you beloved#arcane critical#my post#sevika arcane#arcane sevika
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i am about to say something that i am AWARE sounds insane and i don’t necessarily think it’s a good thing but i am genuinely starting to think it’s what’s happening. i’m pretty sure that what they used to replace the fact that katherine and bianca are women and obviously fadel and bison are not… is the assassin plot
like i’m losing my mind as i type this because it just fucking hit me but that’s. that’s exactly what it is. because fadel and bison are assassins, it gives kant and style free reign to kind of act however they want in order to win them over without facing consequences for lying or doing anything crazy to them because what does it matter, they’re murderers anyways? whereas in the play, petruchio’s misogyny was allowed because at the time women were treated like property and even lucentio tends to treat bianca like a prop that’s meant to be won so that behavior gets excused.
the thing that made me realize this specifically was style’s courtship of fadel this episode, which i planned to make a separate post about but i might as well say it all here cause they’re very closely related. fadel parallels katherine very closely in that while you would think given who they are (for him an assassin, for katherine a shrew), they wouldn’t care as much about social norms or being embarrassed by other people, but that is exactly what is used to court them. in the play, petruchio uses humiliation on several occasions in order to widdle katherine down and to force her into submission. and we see style do the EXACT SAME THING! he yells at fadel in the grocery market to get him to help clean the veggies, he calls fadel’s name over the speakers to get his attention, he makes fadel let him deliver the food to the restaurant by using the excuse that it’ll be rude not to. because as much as fadel is an assassin and katherine a shrew, they both have a sense of pride that makes them do whatever their suitor wants to try and get him to stop embarrassing them in public
the fucking subbed in assassinphobia for misogyny. i’m in a state of shock
#i cant believe this. hello?? is anyone listening HELLO???#the heart killers#the taming of the shrew#fadelstyle#katherine x petruchio#my analysis#mine#tusersilence
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Cobra Kai has a tone-deaf problem.
Now, I am a Black woman so all of my observations are through the lenses of that. You can critique my words all you want, but don't be disrespectful because I will be equally as disrespectful in the replies.
I have this phenomenon that I've noticed for a lot of shows I have watched called The Leo Dooley effect, inspired by character from Lab Rats, where the main character, a POC who set the tone for the whole story, is surrounded by a white ensemble cast that slowly but surely pushes that character aside to serve their purpose.
Cobra Kai does the same thing with Miguel Diaz, as he seems to be the sole reason why any of these things on the show are happening (for better or for worse) and gets one of the worst character driven storylines throughout the series post-coma (I rewrote his story on my blog. Go find it under the Miguel or Xolo hashtags) to further make the show The Robby Show (we'll get into the tone-deaf writing of his character this past season in a minute). He becomes a shell of a character, empty, boring, and in the sidelines all up until the final season, where the writers seem to remember *snaps fingers* oh shit, Miguel's one of our protagonists, and writes an okay story for him. Better than his s5 plot, but not as good as the stuff we got in s1, 2, and the last half of 3 and 4.
Now, s6 has him in his true prime (not in the way people claimed he was in the past seasons). He's got a clear mind, he's goals-oriented, you wouldn't even be able to tell that this kid was paralyzed from the waist down a year ago (in-universe time). However, he's out-performing everyone, was single-handedly saving his team, and it wasn't even enough for Johnny. It was very interesting to watch as People of Color, especially Black and Brown people, tend to have to go above and beyond to prove that we're the shit, but it'll never amount to anything if our white associates (minus Devon in this case - more on her later) aren't doing anything. But the second they do, everyone is getting praised. Miguel knocked his opponent out in forty seconds. FORTY SECONDS. But because the team wasn't doing good overall, he got no attention. I know that feeling all too well and it sucks.
As much as I thought Johnny's "Miguel is our anchor" line was powerful, it also didn't at the same time. The Magical Negro is such an annoying stereotype, as well as the Strong Black Woman/Man, and the Brown and Asian variations that come with it.
Miguel is the Brown equivalent of the Magical Negro, trying to tell the white Johnny what's right and wrong. Teaching him what's okay to say and what's not, despite Johnny being grown enough to probably understand shit on his own. He basically is teaching Johnny in a sense despite the fact that it should be the other way around. And I know that's a typical mentor/mentee thing trope but with how the show goes out of its way to show how self aware of modern problems it is, it's hella tone-deaf.
In terms of the Strong Black Man trope (or in this case Brown), Miguel isn't always strong. He breaks down and cries pretty often but it's viewed by the fandom as annoying, weak, and pathetic, as well as not manly which pisses me all the way off because every time he gets emotional, it's with valid reason. Losing his girlfriend (both times), finding out he's paralyzed, apologizing for running away, his mom possibly dying, not getting into Stanford (tho this would've had more of a punch if Stanford actually mattered but it doesn't whatever). Also, he's a 16/17 year old Brown kid in poverty who was embarrassingly bullied MULTIPLE TIMES. You're telling me you didn't cry as a kid? But when Robby cries every once in a while (which is also equally as valid because he was also a kid in poverty who was bullied), everyone holds his hand and says "it's okay."
"He's our anchor." It just sounds so off to me. Like has to be the one to help everyone else, when you have two Captains who can do the exact same thing. We as POCs have to be the ones to hold down the fort and keep things steady on our backs while white people can settle for mediocrity and not have to do to much because "hey, the POCs got us." It's just like that "if you're in danger, find a Black woman" thing. Because we're expected to be the ones to save y'all when y'all are in trouble. But when the roles reverse, we're expected to save ourselves because we're strong. Y'all don't like it when Miguel isn't emotionally or physically tough because y'all expect him to push through since he's the main character, but it also feels like he's expected to push through because he's a Brown boy in poverty so he's been through enough.
Tory's "we have to fight to get a spot in life" speech was well performed by Peyton List but it felt strange to see a white woman explain privilege to a Brown boy who has less privilege in comparison to her. I have always had a problem with that scene and I never won't have an issue with it.
Moving on to Kenny. Kenny is the only Black character of current time to be in the ensemble. Aisha was on the show but left ofc. Kenny, like Miguel was brutally picked on, primarily by white kids, especially by white rich boy Anthony LaRusso. In the fandom Anthony tends to be the more favored overall. Kenny is primarily favored on the Black side of the fandom (much like Miguel). Similar to Miguel, there was a moment in s6 part two that may have not been intentional but in my eyes, felt very racially targeted.
Hawk and Demetri were very skeptical towards Kenny because they assumed that he was working with Silver despite the fact that Kenny didn't even want to do the Sekai Tekai to begin with after he became publicly bullied again. During a round of tag-teamed fighting, the boys refused to let Kenny in, causing them to lose the round due to Robby not being prepared to be tagged in (he thought they were gonna tag Kenny). Kenny gets mad, rightfully so but the boys didn't back down on their theory (the only reason this theory was even a thing was because they say Kenny and Silver talking and assumed the worst). It took the team's "anchor" to give Robby a pep talk to lead and the others will follow (you know, something a Captain should already know) for Kenny to get the attention he deserves. And then Hawk and Demetri finally accept Kenny. All because the white guy said "hey, we should tag him in."
That sounds so off in so many ways.
It wasn't intentional, I know. But the fact that this was something that happened and the boys didn't even apologize to Kenny after for the assumptions they made only furthers my point on how tone deaf this show can get. Amanda, Miguel, and Robby are literally the only people who see Kenny as more than just a Silver puppet and it sucks because Hawk and Demetri were in the same spot as Kenny once upon a time.
And then there's Devon, the overworking, overwhelmed Asian girlie who tries her hardest to seek validation and gets overlooked. Similar to Miguel in this new part, Devon got ignored badly in the first part. It was so bad that she cheated to get into the Sekai Tekai and got her ass handed to her. And like Miguel, it takes her to have to explain to her white sensei that she's being ignored for him for her to be taken seriously. She's not the best fighter by any means but I thought we were done with this Asian stereotype years ago. And the way Sam talked to her after literally celebrating her victory with all smiles and everything in the first part??? Like it felt so fake as hell.
Finally, Robby. Robby is written well, we all know that. But this shit that they did to him in the second part pissed me off, especially since it's not gonna get addressed apparently. So Robby gets drunk at a bar and basically follows Zara back to her hotel room. Next time we see them, he's disoriented, and she's kissing him. I'm sorry, but that's sexual assault, yes? Robby was drunk and didn't remember anything. So that's her taking advantage of him, yes? Well the creator apparently doesn't think so and is saying that Robby made a mistake and that the interaction won't be talked about next part.
Bitch, Robby is a VICTIM.
Zara sexually assaulted him. Just because he's a man doesn't change the fact that the man got taken advantage of by Zara.
Like did we watch the same scene?
This show has so many problems and I feel like since it's a show about fighting no one cares. But as a Black woman, I see this shit and in between the lines, there's so many issues that won't even get fixed because the show is over.
#xolo maridueña#tanner buchanan#dallas dupree young#oona obrien#cobra kai season 6#cobra kai#miguel diaz#robby keene#kenny payne#devon lee ck
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#glad other christians are catching the odd statements about hell#idylls denies the eternity of hell as it is warned about and it inevitably bled into the post#keep in mind that Jesus spoke more about hell than He did about heaven as it has very real consequences#christianity#be mindful of what you read
@mav-milonn
Hi. Firsts things first my name is Kaleb, not Idylls which might be a stupid thing to be upset about but you would know my name if you knew me, which you do not. And as such you really should be more mindful about what you say.
I am well aware of all the people mentioning what they think are my views on hell and I have ignored all except 1. Idrc what a bunch of strangers think; I am following @/greater than the sword tho and tho I disagree with her on a lot I would prefer she think well of me.
You, however, are just rude. I am not a hell denier. Actually talk to me for five seconds about my thoughts on divine justice and you would know that. After reading my essay — if indeed you did read it — do you really think I am unaware that of the theology of hell? I have been a conservative Christian all my life and grew up in a conservative southern Baptist premillennialist young earth creationist church. I assure you, I know about hell 🙄.
That said I also know many other things. Like Gehenna — either 1) the Valley of [the Son of] Hinnom or 2) the Valley of Wailing — being a trash heap in southwest Jerusalem where kings would slaughter their children and so Yahweh declared he would slaughter them in the valley. I know that translating Gehenna as hell is pretty unhelpful. I know that the hope of the Christian faith is not life after death (heaven) but life after life after death (resurrection after heaven). I know that the hope of the Christian faith is the rebirth of the universe and the marriage of heaven and earth. I know that Christians do not die because they are united to Christ and Christ is forever alive and we are forever alive in him. I know that the ancient hebrews lacked belief in an immaterial soul. I know that God is not a sadistic tyrant who needs his pound of flesh. I know that God hates hell. I know they God is an eternal community of other centered life giving love from the Father to the Son (and extension to his body the church) communicated by the Spirit. I know that I do not sing forever the praises of thd God who didn’t kill me, but rather I am willing to die at the hands of evil in the name of the God who liberated me from slavery to sin and death by dying the death of a slave tho he knew no sin. I know that the Orthodox believe that heaven and hell are one play and that your experience depends on theosis. I know (some?) Roman Catholics believe that hell is not burning fire but deprivation from God who is source of all goodness and beauty. I know that annihilationalists believe that since God is Life, to reject God is to reject Life thus choosing death. I know that C.S Lewis believed hell is an autonomous choice and God’s respect to human dignity where the doors are locked on the inside.
I mentioned in the post that “some Christians idea of hell has developed past “God mad. Punish sinner.” And into a more temporary condition and even autonomous choice on the individual.” I meant to say “or” not “and”. That is 100% my mistake. Those are 2 completely separate views.
It is also a mistake I cleared up in the tags of a reblog so if you cared they deeply you could’ve found it.
The view that hell is basically a purgatory and all will eventually be saved is called purgatorial universalism.
I am not a purgatorial universalist and think that while valid it is still wrong. Universalism is just diet-Calvinism (which I disagree with) dunked in sugar and candy and icing. (Me and a friend haves talked about both at length in dms)
Even if I was a purgatorial universalist, it would not warrant your response because it is not a denial of hell, even if it denies the eternity of hell. It is a denial of your conception of hell, if your conception of hell is just burning torture for eternity. That said, many many many conservative Christians from Nondenominational Evangelical to Eastern Orthodox would disagree with that conception.
As for what my conception of hell actually is, it’s that you shouldn’t be rude by accusing people of being hell deniers. I am literally some random teenager on the internet like come on.
Goodness. Is this what Tim Mackie feels like when he’s called a hell denier? As for the people in the reblogs calling TBP hell deniers: just admit you don’t understand their conception of hell. Just say you disagree or don’t understand but for the love of Christ don’t say they (or I) are hell deniers. We’re not. Chill out.
Also hell is mentioned twice in this entire post. Like. Maybe focus on the actual topic which is the sovereignty of God over life and death, his abounding faithfulness and loyal love, and the justice he will bring on his own people if they do evil towards others.
insane for parents to read the story of isaac and abraham to their kids like ok so would you also kill me if god asked you to, dad?
#this is probably incoherent#and possibly mean#if anything is rude please forgive me#(I haven’t eaten all day 😭)#if anyone does want to know what I think of he’ll feel free to ask#just don’t throw accusations at literal strangers
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Inchie we need your words of reason again 🙏 Newer fans have bled over from other hockey rpf and keep crossing lines 🫥
babe idk how wise I am ?? at all but I'm a firm believer in using common sense about rpf. and I haven't personally seen the stuff you're alluding to but! I've seen posts referring to it and I heard smth about another ship suffering a containment breach… so can't hurt to throw my 2c in as well ?? idk?
tl;dr that landoscar is NOT the ship for you if you 're going to try and force it to be "real" in a l*rry way*. this ship adores the real life friendship without having it compete with the guys' other many friendships - and we do NOT hate women and women partners or pretend they're beards/fakes/conveniently open relationship. and we absolutely do NOT push rpf outside of fandom. you'll get blocked/reported if you do. this is NOT the space for you to find your next "omg what if they're actually fcking" ship. Lily and Oscar are basically forever, Lando is rightfully loving his life sharing his beautiful body with people, and the fan fiction for the ship is staggeringly amazing so we're very very happy w the status quo <3
and we do NOT share rpf content with Lando, Oscar, anyone in F1, the families - basically if they're not someone you know solely in fandom, you don't share rpf with them. again, you will not find support for that here.
I "officially" joined landoscar fandom around Silverstone 2023 and these have been the hard lines taken for as long as I can remember and from all of the OG people in this fandom. esp from people who've been here since Oscar's Alpine tweet bc landoscar is unique in not having led with a PR image and we've all gotten to see every nervous, stumbling and authentic progression of their partnership and friendship along the way - at no point feeling the need to cross the boundary between fic and reality. it truly is charming and intriguing and rewarding as it exists in reality!
as far as the 'why' essay I'll drop all that where it can be ignored easily aslfgjalgf
like I said - landoscar has always been the exception of no one ever slipping over into trying to "make it real" in large part bc Lando and Oscar don't do the PR bromance/fake gay/fan service stuff which !reminder! is content in other ships I absolutely eat up and is 100% targeted to me but !! I'm also aware is connected to a lot of inappropriate fan behavior from ppl who blur the lines between amusing PR content and reality. trust me, I had to basically abandon carland0 which was my very first f1 ship bc to this day - fully out in the open - I see casual misogyny thrown around about Rebecca and ppl truly loudly thinking Lando and Carlos - who have always referred to each other as brothers and who laugh at the "gay" stuff they do precisely bc it's not real - genuinely fcked and/or dated. I will never care enough about an rpf ship to willingly encounter that shit on a regular basis. I know there's a lot of good ppl in the ship who don't engage in that stuff but I have such a hard line about wag hate that it's not worth it for me.
ironically or maybe because of, Lando and Oscar are the only drivers to NOT engage in playing gay for laughs BUT also who hit multiple progressive bullet points in things like discussing romance and dating in gender neutral terms and not making a big deal out of consuming or discussing queer media etc. they actually walk the walk in not pushing gender identity or sexual orientation on hypotheticals or on each other. they also don't do any macho/tradmasc behavior with each other or even bro-ey stuff like rough-housing or loud, aggressive humor (nothing wrong with loud bro stuff tho as long as it doesn't veer into toxic territory! I come from hockeyblr originally so it can be really sweet!)
and landoscar is also the exception in that we all ADORE Lily and have zero interest in trying to erase her let alone anyone be hostile toward her. in straight people culture they're basically already married and that's how they were when landoscar started as a ship! a lot of us have regularly made posts similar to this for newer fans to remind them that Lily (and whoever Lando ends up with as a steady partner) are NOT pawns in an rpf game. Lily is a real human woman with a real life relationship with Oscar and while no one is obliged to engage w wag content, respecting her existence is the bare minimum expected.
the last point I should make is that there's a very clear difference for instance on my blog where I see fanservice ship content about say charl0s or frand0 or n0rtrell and lose my mind over it and love it etc. but then there's Alex or Rebecca or Pietra on my blog! bc I can have fun without erasing women or losing common sense!!
whereas whenever I post stuff about a friendship that rly does make me Feel Things and write my insane essays, it's bc of what the relationships verifiably are and not what they aren't. Max F truly has a complexity and level of depth in his relationship with Lando that is unique and special to each other's lives. in the same way, Lando and Oscar truly do have a particular charm and fondness for each other that's made them approach each other unusually tentatively and slowly - while also having such intense blushing fondness as well as a uniquely intriguing maturity to their professional partnership. this stuff is fascinating and those two examples in particular swim around into all kinds of social/emotional territory.
in ways that do not require conspiracies and fan theories of them fcking or dating to make them compelling.
(and tbh the fact that Lando has some form of "crush" on a lot of handsome men and subconsciously/consciously "flirts" is absolutely fine to enjoy... as long as none of it gets outside of fandom.)
and the fan fiction for landoscar is truly TRULY staggeringly prolific and immensely talented so that's where we go for imagining them in any other type of reality <3
*do not get mad or whatever abt this - if you did or still do just want to ship l*rry privately then whatever but that's the like terrible gold standard for horrific real life repercussions of taking rpf seriously and why fandoms should never ever allow that to happen. there's no debate about that.
#inchreplies#landoscar#mctwinks#twinklaren#using all the tags bc if this is genuinely a problem then we gotta root it out#as someone who makes content about this one ship I am not saying I'm like a major blog or anything#just that with a certain amount of followers it's definitely smth I should weigh in on if that makes sense#wank adjacent#pinned post
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finally speaking up regarding the final words vi said, her whole character arc this season and how things went for her in the final act and same goes with caitlyn.
to be honest, i have been struggling to enjoy the representation because personally, my wow, representation! can either apply on the piltover’s finest finally being canon on screen and being oppressed as a zaunite for me. if caitlyn becoming a dictator scared me during the first act, vi saying “i am the dirt under your nails, cupcake. nothing’s gonna clean me out.” surely left me devastated.
for me, this wasn’t vi assuring caitlyn that no matter what she does again, no matter how dirty her hands get again, vi will always be there for her—or maybe it also is. in the show, no one is there physically and mentally holding back vi anymore, the only person left and she believes who knows her deeply here now is caitlyn. her only family died in that ‘explosion.’
unfortunately, given their different classes, vi still looks at herself as something that caitlyn shouldn’t be proud to have. it makes me sad that she genuinely believes she is nothing but a dirt, an oil, a nuisance, a zaunite, or a lower class—way beneath than caitlyn’s tiled floors on her house in piltover even if she climbs back up to her actual title in the game which is becoming an enforcer. it wasn’t a sweet promise, it was ‘self-awareness’.
even if she stands in the land of piltover, the fact that she knows she truly belongs nowhere boggles my mind. they never gave her character depth in this season, either. if you see vi, she’s either with jinx, with caitlyn, or struggling to breathe normally without thinking about the both of them.
what happened to her when she was imprisoned for how many years? surely, not only her fighting skills were enhanced in that place. did we see how she was struggling to accept how every single one of them changed? powder, ekko, and now caitlyn. no matter how things got progressively worse between the two seasons, she remained the same? vander was still clearly a threat at the end of the battle, there was not a single percent of chance of getting to save him from his state, but she still kneeled beside him and believed that he could go back like she once did. it was devastating to see her resort to becoming a pitfighter, but it was more devastating to see that her worst rock bottom was only compiled in a montage. not much was given for her character to be explored once again. how can we ever throw a perfect opportunity for a character’s story like vi’s to be understood?
“you’ve got a good heart, don’t ever try to lose it. no matter how hard the world tries to break you.”
but perhaps, this truly was the whole point of vi’s character. she has been really selfless, it doesn’t matter what kind of chaos the narrative is going to bring to the table. she has been taught to fight well and she will always use the same tactic for it. if her visible bruises doesn’t seem to bother her throughout the whole show, it must be saying the same thing about how she’s been actually doing. she would only beg to differ once it includes the people she cares for. if that’s the case, the show really showed that to me, but.... man, i want to give her a hug.
#arcane#caitvi#violyn#caitlyn x vi#vi x caitlyn#piltover’s finest#arcane vi#vi arcane#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn arcane#league of legends#league of legends vi#league of legends caitlyn#. . . val’s rants! 🥊🧁
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Base Yandere ADULT Billy Loomis Headcanons: Do No Wrong (Scream)
[Hello, My Sexy Muffins! I am finally here with the base headcanons of Billy Loomis! I hope that you all had a great spooky season as it is coming to a close and I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving now let's do this!
(Disclaimer: This is Billy Loomis when he is 18 or 19 because I do not know if he is 17 or under in the show, in this he is a young adult! Thank you!!
Disclaimer: Billy Loomis is not yandere in canon! This is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! Simping for fictional characters and yanderes is fine! Just do not be illegal or gross about it! You know who you are! You Dirty, Flaky, Bisucits! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have in real life! Also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon thank you! Disclaimer: Slashers and Villains are fine to simp for, just do not condone or support what they do in real life, and do not justify what they do. It is fine to simp for the bad guy as long as no real people get hurt! Again remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon! Thank you!)
Enjoy this chapter!]
-Base Yandere Headcanons With Billy Loomise Aka Ghostface From Scream-
.Billy had a normal life and normal family and normal mental health.
.That was until his father cheated and that is when everything went to hell.
.He bloomed into a psychotic version of himself but he was not chaotic like some. Instead he could play the long game.
.Like Dating Sidney just so he could have the chance to kill her.
.He never loved Sideny and instead, he loved you, you were the love of his life and the person that he wanted the most.
.He is a very possessive man who would kill anyone and everyone for you, but he does not do it impulsively.
.Instead, he plans out each of his kills and even gets an accomplice he can trust to do them!
.He got someone to work with him that he could trust around you and that was a hard sell but not impossible.
.He had the plan to kill Sidney and make you his and his alone.
.He needed to keep you in the dark about his plans though as he did not want you to get hurt or be a loose end that would need to be tied up.
.He would deal with rivals in a few ways, one of the main ones adding them to his list of victims but killing them at random so that no one expected that it was because of you that they were being killed.
.The other less gruesome ways he would do it, is by planting evidence on them that got you to steer clear of them, or ending up with the police dealing with them.
.Before that he made sure everyone stayed away from you by being your "friend" and saying no one was good enough for his best friend.
.He is the type of yandere to be protective but slightly bit unstable.
.In which if you were aware of his interest in you, you would notice the way he stares at you when no one is looking.
.Or that he lingers by your side longer than he should.
.Or even the times he broke into your home and watched you sleep. Hiding under your bed when you woke up so he could sneak out after.
.Not to mention how he knew all your favorite things, the things you disliked, and so on and so forth.
.That he knows a creepy amount about you.
.If you were aware of his feelings you would have noticed it, but you were not, no one was, because once again he is good at playing the long game.
.How he would confess to you?
.It could be a few ways, ending with a few results.
.The first way is he could not wait any longer and broke up with Sideny, confessing his love to you.
.If you accepted his love he would be over the men and may even not need to kill Sideny as he got his happily ever after.
.If you rejected this love confession he would know you out and kidnap you, to make sure that you stayed safe and stayed with him.
.He was keeping you safe after all, everything he has done he did almost solely for you!
.Of course, really it was all for him, his selfish needs to own you and have you as his and his alone.
.His selfish needs to get revenge on Sidney and her father when they had nothing to do with it!
.To him what he was doing was justice and he was the fine hand of it, that Sidney and her father had it coming.
.And that all the people he killed for you had It coming because they tried to steal you away from him and that was unforgivable.
.Now the other way he would confess to you is the night he tried to kill Sideny, but this time he did succeed and you saw him kill Sidney.
.He would have held your face with his bloody hands and told you he did it all for you.
.If you accept his love (Which you most likely did because you did not want to die!) he would kiss you and take you away with him.
.He cannot trust you to not leave him and tell the police what really happened. Not until he was one hundred percent sure you were truly loyal to him and him alone.
.If you reject his love he will stab you in the stomach and run off with you, leaving evidence that Sidney's dad had killed you and hid your body.
.He then has you taken care of far away as a jane doe. Then he takes you from that hospital and runs off with you.
.No one would ever see you again, but everyone would remember the story of Ghostface, and how every few years he kills again.
.The people that he does kill across the country are people who tried to help you escape or who he thought had got too close to you, and of course, Stu keeping up the Ghostface slasher legend.
.Billy's love for you would go down in history the same way the Ghostface serial killer slasher did.
.Side not do not try and escape too much, or he will break your leg, in a way that it would not heal right and that you can never ever physically run again.
.Other than that he takes good care of you and would have gaslit and manipulated you into accepting his love.
.Or you had accepted his love for your own safety and sanity.
.Either way, you are always on edge with Billy and wondering who will he kill next because of you, and if he ever will kill you.
.He would never kill you, because he is the type of yandere that blames everyone else for it.
.Even if you slept with Stu, he would blame Stu and attack him before blaming you the love of his life, his darling.
.In his eyes you can never do anything wrong.
[YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS finally got this one done! I hope you all enjoyed this, and stay sexy, all of my sexy muffins!]
#yandere#yandere billy loomis#yandere ghostface#yandere scream#yandere headcanons#headcanon#scream#scream ghostface#scream billy loomis#ghostface#ghostface billy#youtube#billy loomis#billy loomis x reader#reader#gender neutral reader#ghostface x reader
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(agent grayson 2014-2016 issue #5)
i finally got to reading this issue, which i have been dreading. mainly because it is written by a writer who notoriously cannot write anybody but especially women. also because of the plot.
the start of this issue as far as i am aware offers no correlation to how midnighter ended up on the same plane as dick and helena. it doesn't even visually show us, just tells us. in the frame of storytelling, it is quite dreadful. where is the buildup?
also, how the fuck did 'the heart' get into a baby who wasn't born yet? why wasn't it instead in the mother? i don't know why i'm asking these questions when tom sure as hell did not.
they're made to cross the desert and somehow, only helena was injured by the crash. there's no mention or showing of the absolutely fucking brutal sunburns i know they should've received from walking the desert from sunrise to sundown for more than a week.
then there's the part that somehow pissed me off even more. the part that is the panel i've shown above. fuck you, tom king. i'll leave pebbles in all of your fucking shoes. i'll purchase every last one of your favorite beverages and pour it down the fucking drain. i will leave your toilet seat up in the middle of the night so you fall in.
he wrote it that midnighter would suggest taking the newborn child and remove the heart she has aka a meta bio-weapon in order to get them (himself, dick, and helena) to safety. he is right about spyral, though. they will do the same thing he is saying he will do.
midnighter, though? he would not fucking say or do that to a child. especially not to a newborn.
though dc made good on erasing not only his marriage or even dating apollo, they did even more on erasing their child, jenny quantum. yes. all of you who only know midnighter from this series? he has a child. but why tell you why he wouldn't do this when i can show you? before i get to that however, i'll tell you how i would've written this.
after the events of the crash and since mine is a midnighter that is a result of a wildstorm to dc transfer, he would maintain his original state but just shoved in this new world. with that in mind, he would've called a door.
no, not the shitty one they gave him in dc. a door connected to the carrier. argus taking down all communications wouldn't have the same effect on a sentient shiftship's ability to provide a door.
now does dick and helena being on the carrier provide issues? yes, but midnighter is taking a risk for the sake of a child. if anyone (especially spyral) wants to fucking try them, they can try.
why would midnighter bring them on the carrier besides to get them out of the desert? so the engineer and doctor can check over the baby and make sure the heart is working correctly. not only that, but making sure that they can make the baby impossible to track by argus and spyral alike.
also, the mother (who i have survive because fuck tom king) would get the medical attention she needed and they'd have her and her baby stay there until she can leave with her daughter through a door to go home to her loved ones.
i'd have it that both dick and helena had injuries from the crash which the engineer and doctor would very much check and treat them for injuries. however, they'd make them promise to tell their superiors they lost the heart. that they were picked up and got medical treatment after being stranded in the desert.
congratulations to argus and spyral though, you're now on a semi-retired authority's radar. anyone who knows this team of freaky bastards will tell you that this is a no good very bad thing. you're better off with batman being after you.
here is visual proof from existing comic panels that midnighter would not fucking say or do that to the baby in this issue of agent grayson:
sources:
the authority 1999-2002 issue #17
the authority: prime 2007-2008 issue #1
#dc#dc comics#wildstorm#the authority#midnighter#dick grayson#nightwing#agent grayson#buds.txt#he willingly throws himself into danger to protect kids. especially his and apollo's daughter aka jenny quantum.#so keep your fucking mouth shut and your pens unsharpened tomass.#where's the rest of the authority during this? avoiding being on the carrier.#they don't want someone from the batfamily knowing more than they already do. or anybody really.#look they maybe semi-retired and have public identities but they don't want people bothering them.#also when i tell you i could've used a plethora of panels for the end of the post.. i could've used a ton. midnighter is just like that.
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Evangeline could sense this hero was being genuine, but she couldn’t go with him. Not now. Evangeline shook her head. “I can’t go with you. See this place, this is where the others have been trapped like I was. I need to free them now before Drake and Myra do something horrible to them.” Tristan raised an eyebrow in confusion and surprise. “Myra? Drake? Are you referring to Matthew’s mother and uncle? I’m afraid what you have said is impossible. Myra is likely dead now and so is Drake. I know since Matthew admitted he killed Drake.” Tristan explained. Evangeline looked shocked. “Drake..is dead?” She spoke with a stunned voice. Tristan nodded. Evangeline looked down as she tried to process what Tristan said. It was clear to her that he knew Matthew as well, but what he said, it shouldn’t be accurate. “That’s…that’s impossible.” Evangeline uttered. “Drake and Myra can’t be killed! Matthew shouldn’t have been able to kill Drake..unless.” A strange, hopeful expression appeared on Evangeline’s face which further confused Tristan. ‘What is she talking about? Why does she think Drake and Myra couldn’t be killed?’ Evangeline looked at Wordman with a hopeful expression. “Listen, I was originally planning on storming this place and save as many lives as I can. But what you just said is true, then that means Matthew is the key to freeing all those hostages left. I didn’t want to drag him into this mess, but he may be the only one who can help. I need you to take me to him, please.” Evangeline pleaded. Tristan frowned. “I do plan on taking you to a place where we can talk, but I agreed that Matthew would not have to be near you, nor his family. I am aware of what you have done under Drake’s command.” Tristan growled. Evangeline frowned, looking guilty and ashamed. “I know. I can’t begin to make up for the horrible things that happened to him. Matthew didn’t deserve the torment he went through. Still, if I’m right about what Matthew might be, then he could be a threat to Myra and her allies. It would also explain why Myra and Drake kicked him out after Sebastian was killed. Please. You have to trust me.” Gene wasn’t sure what to expect when the door to his home opened. He hoped Tristan returned safely once again. He didn’t expect to see Hugh carrying Patricia who was missing a leg. He definitely didn’t expect Archie to carry what looked like a zombie dog who was holding Patricia’s leg. Matthew let out a fearful yelp and hugged Carl tightly when he saw the decaying dog. “Why is there a zombie dog here?” Matthew exclaimed fearfully. “It’s not a zombie dog. He’s a Church Grimm. The reason why he’s here is because he won’t let go of my leg.” Patricia exclaimed in a slightly frustrated tone. Gene blinked as he tried to process what he was seeing and hearing. The dog was still holding Patricia’s leg and seemed to be growling at the woman. “Um…why did the Church Grimm steal your leg?” Gene asked hesitantly. “Hey, this little guy was just doing his job. A very good job I must admit. You see, Church Grimms are the dead spirits of animals buried in graveyards. Their job is to protect the souls and bodies buried in cemeteries. I believe he’s upset because I’m technically undead and not laid to rest. He’s trying to drag me back to whatever grave I’m supposed to be buried in.” Patricia turned to the dog. “I’m sorry boy, I’m still alive also.” The woman cooed. The decaying dog ruffed at her, not looking happy. Patricia then frowned. “Though I am confused as to why a Church Grimm is in America. His species are found in Northern Europe mainly.” @dualnaturedscientist
"Hold on a minute, some weird guy is staring at me. Probably some bum trying to get change off of me." Comments like that had ensured he would absolutely be relieved of guilt for what was to happen next. A smile spreads across the figure's facial features, revealing inhumanly sharp teeth glinting in the street lights. A hand quickly shot out, taking a hold of the rather obnoxious man. "What the hell are you doing-" A scream soon pierced the quietness of the night. It quickly became a horrendous gurgling noise. The cellphone in the man's hand had fallen in the process. Leaving the person on the other end to become worried and confused about what was happening to the man. It didn't take very long for the man to become completely still. The figure allows him to finally fall to the cement below, licking at his blood stained lips in satisfaction. "The night, it is still so young. I don't think I shall waste another minute on you." Like a ghost in the night, he had vanished. As if he were never there. Leaving only the grotesque mess he had made for others to find. Unknown to him, there was a witness to this who had seen the whole thing. Watching in complete and utter fear. The figure grinned, it was as if he were seeing the world through different eyes. The opportunities that awaited him. It sent a shiver of excitement up his spine. His thirst might have satiated but he wasn't satisfied with only that. Oh no. There was so much more he had in mind for this city. Just wait till morning until they discover his little surprise for all to see. It wasn't until hours later did he finally return to the house. Feeling pleased with himself. Carl shot up in bed, heart racing so fast within his chest. Calming down once realizing he was in bed with Matthew. It took the retired scientist to recognize his surroundings. "That's right.. we're at Gene's place." The dream he had woken up from was already fading from his memory. It was rather absurd, recalling what he could. He could've sworn the dream was incredibly vivid and felt so real. But the little bits of the dream that he did remember became fuzzy and distant in his mind. Carl wasn't as quiet as he thought. Matthew had woken up. "Love, are you okay?" His voice had brought Carl from his thoughts. "Matthew, dearest. I hadn't meant to wake you up." He frowned, feeling guilty as he wanted his husband to get as much rest as needed. "It's alright, I needed to get up early anyway. Don't feel bad, my darling. I'm worried about you, though.” He gave Matthew a smile. “It was just a dream. I was just startled from a dream. I don't even remember what happened in it anymore. I'll be fine.” Matthew pulled the other into his arms, holding him in such a comforting manner. Placing a loving kiss to Carl's forehead. “Even so, I've still got you.” The former scientist blushed. Matthew still had such an effect on him even after all this time. “Thank you, my love.” They had stayed like that for a good while. It wasn't until Carl noticed the time that he forced Matthew to get out of bed and to get ready for his community service. Though there was something that had been bothering Carl since waking up. He had not remembered going back to bed after his conversation with Gene last night. No matter how much he tried to, it just kept coming up blank to him. Carl sighed, he must've been that tired that he didn't remember. He was getting up there in age. “I could stay back. Margaret won't be very happy about it but I don't want to leave you if you're not okay.” Carl smiled once more. “I'm not going to be responsible for what she'd do if you tried. You're also expecting a new face there, aren't you?” Matthew looked surprised at that. He had completely forgotten about that. And Carl did make a point. Wincing at the thought of what Margaret might do if he actually did skip out on it. Though for Carl, it would've been absolutely worth it. Whatever punishment she'd dole out, he'd endure for his dearest husband. “Go get dressed now.” Matthew chuckled at that before doing as he said. Leaving Carl to this thoughts.
Carl still felt unsettled by the dream, it was like he was walking through a mist. Yet at the same time it was like someone or something was controlling his body and actions. The dream was scary, but also ludicrous. At one point Carl thought he saw someone who looked like his old narcissus ex boyfriend who he never thought about again until now. Carl just let out a sigh and shook his head. 'It was just a nightmare.' Carl reassured himself. He remembered how reading how the mind and senses can trick the body into thinking something is real when it isn't. His strange dream was just one of those cases. Carl decided to get out of bed and go downstairs. He was going to try and help his son and other son-in-law deal with this strange and frightening case of kidnapping. Carl pushed away the issue of the nightmare and headed downstairs, ignoring the feeling of dread in the back of his mind. Carl also did not pay attention to that fact that his mouth was no longer dry and that there was no glass cup on the nightstand when he got up that morning. Atomic Steele surveyed the area with caution and an intense gaze. He was going over the area looking for something out of the ordinary. Something that had bothered his friend and teammate Electric Blur. Something in this seemingly abandoned area affected Blur's powers. "I wasn't sure what just happened. It felt like I was suddenly communicating emotionally with a strange energy wave that was being transmitted from there. I felt uneasy and scared...but also sad for some reason." That is what Blur told Atomic when she came back to their hideout looking shaken and worried. She told him she never felt anything like that before, not even from the fallen B.E.A.W labs. Atomic Steele offered to check it out for her as the young heroine wasn't keen on returning to the spot. While Electric Blur was being comforted by her other teammates, Atomic followed the directions the heroine had given him to the location where she felt the strange and unsettling energy. What Atomic Steele found when he got there was a large but abandoned warehouse surrounded by an empty field. The area was surrounded by a rusted, wired fence. The place looked like it hadn't been used for years. Still, the normally brave yet brash young hero couldn't help but feel a child go up his spine. His gut and instincts telling him there is something dangerous here, something evil. Atomic Steele walked up to the doors of the warehouse. He grabbed at a rusted handle and tried opening it. To the hero's surprise and growing caution, the door easily unlocked. Atomic Steele took a deep breath and steadied his nerves. He then proceeded inside the warehouse in a slow pace, ready to discover what laid inside. "Oh hello there Matthew. Cutting it a bit close are we." Miss Dewey lightly teased the former villain as he just came into the library to start his community service. "Sorry about that Miss Dewey. I had some problems this morning but I'm here now." Matthew replied, feeling a bit embarrassed about cutting things close. He really didn't want to leave Carl and Gene alone during the family crisis that was happening but at the same time he really didn't want to test the limits of his second chance at freedom from prison. Miss Dewey gave the man a look of sympathy and concern. "You know, if there is a serious problem going on at home, I wouldn't mind helping you fill out some forms to request a temporary leave from your community service." The librarian offered. Matthew smiled in appreciation at her kind gesture. "Thank you Miss Dewey but I'll be alright." Matthew responded. "So has the new service worker arrived yet?", the former villain asked. Miss Dewey smiled and nodded. "Yes he is here. Matthew, allow me to introduce you to Frank Leigh." Matthew glanced over to the man Miss Dewey introduced. He looked to be a few years older than Victor but still younger than Matthew and Carl. He had dark hair and light, blueish gray eyes. The man gave a friendly wave to Matthew. "Hi nice to meet you." Frank spoke in a kind tone. @dualnaturedscientist
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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Ravenous is Haunted
Within the lore of Ravenous, eating people causes you to “absorb [their] spirit,” but what does that mean in practice?
Ives mentions that eating someone brave gives you a surge of bravery, which is exactly how Boyd goes from too scared to move to single-handedly capturing the enemy command. The spirit of his fellow soldiers and specifically his commanding officer compel him to do it. But we know that this personality shift is not permanent, it abates. However, I believe that there are other more subtle influences that remain.
There’s a whole collection of things Boyd, Ives, and Hart do and say that mirror the actions and words of the people they’ve eaten…
The protectiveness that Boyd shows towards the Fort Spencer crew after Ives arrives as colonel is a new trait for him and highly reminiscent of Reich’s protectiveness towards Toffler. From the moment he’s stuck with Ives at the fort, Boyd also immediately decides to murder him, the thing that Reich died furious at him for not doing, and never strays from this mission at all. Boyd and Ives both headbutt each other in their final fight, a Knox fighting move, and Boyd also attempts to strangle Ives at one point, which is Reich’s. Another example that I like is when Hart says to the chickens he’s feeding “run away! run for your lives!” which is what Toffler died doing. These are all small moments in isolation, but together they form a compelling picture.
For another thing, you have Boyd mentioning to Hart near the end the “nightmares” he’s “still” having about Reich, Cleaves, and Knox. These aren’t just random trauma nightmares, they are specifically about the three people of the Fort Spencer crew that he’s eaten. And, considering how strongly Hart reacts to the mention of this, he is likely experiencing the same thing. Since it is canon that they have actually ABSORBED these people by eating them, I don’t think it’s a stretch at all to call this a haunting.
Put these together and you have the people who have been eaten haunting the cannibal characters at night and maintaining at least some sway over them by day, often without them even realizing it… Fun stuff!
As far as Ives goes, I think that he is less affected by this phenomenon than Boyd and Hart are. He’s been eating people for much longer than they have, he has no moral compass whatsoever, and he has a very strong personality, so he’s not gonna let a little haunting get to him. That being said, who knows what quirks of his personality we might be able to attribute to people he’s eaten in the past if we knew more about them? I also think that his assumption that he is unaffected by the people he eats is a part of his downfall, and I’ll explain that in a moment.
The last thing I want to talk about is the bell because that’s what REALLY gets me mmmmmmmmmmm… SO! During Boyd’s fight with Ives, there’s a moment where Ives has fled the room they were fighting in and Boyd doesn’t know where he is, so he’s checking behind all these random doors and not finding him when he hears a bell ringing in the courtyard. He goes out and sees the ringing bell but no one near it. Instead of going towards it where he knows Ives is likely waiting for him though, he walks towards the barn, as if in a daze. When he enters, he sees the bear trap and gets an “Aha!” look on his face.
Now, who do we know who is associated with both that bell and a bear trap? It’s Reich! He is the only person we ever see ring that bell and (in a deleted scene) he uses bear traps as target practice, shooting at them to snap them shut while Boyd watches. So, at the very least, we can say that Reich indirectly inspires Boyd in that course of action.
BUT, because I am me, I’d like to take it a step further by proposing that, since Reich is haunting both Boyd AND Ives, he influences Ives to ring the bell (with Ives not consciously thinking anything more of about than “this will surely get Boyd’s attention >:)”) and then influences Boyd to walk over to the barn instead of immediately continuing the fight so he can show him how to end it once and for all. Boyd asked Reich to “tell me what to do,” and Reich answered him!
I did also write a fic about this concept a few years ago if anyone is interested!
#ravenous 1999#hopefully this will reach everyone who expressed interest in this idea!#i am TRULY obsessed with it… this is my exclusive reading of the film now#i’m not claiming it’s 100% canon - but it’s also not subjective to me#Ravenous Ghosts REAL!!!!!!!#i also do like the idea that the eaten people can manifest in people’s nightmares individually or come all together to Yell At Them#depending on the circumstances… depending on the vibes…#but yeah tldr: Reich’s ghost rang the bell… to me…#oh ALSO if you’re gonna read the fic - please watch the deleted scenes first#it does NOT make sense without them#particularly without the extended Slauson scenes which i still think should have been in the final film#which imply that Slauson absolutely knows that Boyd Did A Survival Cannibalism#and very possibly believes that the rest of the Fort Spencer crew WERE murdered#but pressures Boyd to cover it all up for the sake of the economy (which is also to Slauson’s own benefit)#and uses the cannibalism thing to blackmail him#it’s sooooooooo good#but yeah… honestly leave it to me to publish a fic that makes zero sense unless you’ve seen four deleted scenes#AND are aware of my highly specific Ghost Analysis…#iconic - truly
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stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!
wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end
#yeah im too sleepy to revise this. UNFILTERED posting wooahh#some may b shocked but i do actually read thru most of my posts several times to make sure i didnt accidentally write mein kampfe 2#recently ive come to the realization that i am in fact not an incredibly chill person#and that the constant paranoia and fear in which i live my life is actually PROBABLY a symptom of severe anxiety#like damn. ive always known that im pretty prone to depression but ive preetty much always been aware of that#my mom is a chronic depressive so i know the symptoms i know the signs i have a pretty good arsenal of healthy coping mechanisms#UNFORTUNATELY mommy's mental health problems did not help her not abuse me as a child#so i ended up being a terribly anxious kid who was constantly being screamed at and told i was overreacting (because i was. because i had#a severe anxiety problem that was making me react irrationally.) to everything all the time#which is you know. it is VERY difficult to deal with a mental health problem when you arent aware you have a problem!#its incredible how much. better. my life has gotten since i figured this out and started actively trying to work out what triggers it#and being able to like. realize 'oookay. there is an Issue here and it needs to be overcome'#instead of just beating on myself constantly for not being able to do things without feeling sick or getting breathing problems!#anyways. trauma dumping in tags is over now!#house md#hilson#greg house#james wilson#stacy warner
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