#which!!! the sex stuff IS a Fucked Up Thing i will need to unpack later!!!! but its so beautiful i get to explore it on my own now!!!!!!!

[cocoa-coated-fish]

life is made in the little things. I'm being so serious. It's having a clean house, it's doing the dishes even when you're sad. It's eating 3 meals a day when you don't want to. It's heating up leftovers and knowing you cooked that to nurture your mind and body. It's buying a sleeper sofa so your friend can be comfortable when she comes to visit.

Six years ago, I didn't know if I would be here.

Two months ago, I wouldn't have been able to do all these things that give me great peace.

Just...things are good.

[sixx-writes]

                             Mother III

Final Form/Perfect Cell x Reader

Word Count: 4,277

cw: slight noncon, rough sex, blood, creampie, cum eating, face fucking

AO3 Version | Masterlist

Summary: AU where reader finds Cell’s egg in the woods and he’s just an alien instead of an android. (AKA my idea for Cell if he used a particular human as a surrogate ‘mother’ instead of eating people to reach his other forms). Meant to be scary/creepy so heed the tags for stuff you’re not comfy with but it is Cell after all so I hope I do it justice :D (chapters are in the same order as Cell’s forms.)

Pt. 1 | 2 | 3

18+ ONLY NSFW BELOW THE CUT

  Four Months Later

You had remained on the edge for the last week of the month following Cell's visit  expecting him to reappear like clockwork and have his way with you again. It was something that left you in a state of horrible anticipation and dread. You'd only realized how much you'd wanted to see him again when he didn't show up. Not even when the next month was halfway over or the month after that did he make his appearance. The whole experience had faded into a repressed area of your brain while life went on and the rest of humanity had no idea that some alien fucking monster had used you as a vending machine.

You had considered telling someone a few times about the encounters with Cell but you had no real evidence that any of it had ever occurred. You would just end up being sent away to a shrink for evaluation which was the last thing you needed. You had certainly learned your lesson on defying Cell's orders to stay put and wait for him so that's just what you did.

Your daily life had turned into a slow pull of the band aid when all you wanted was to tear it off and get it over with.

You twirled a strand of your hair not understanding the letters on the screen of your pc. A single paragraph was all you had written and the deadline was tomorrow morning.

Thank God it was Friday.

"Fucking hell," you muttered trying to rub the tiredness out of your eyes.

To hell with this, you thought, I'm going on a picnic this weekend.

With that in mind you let out a heavy sigh and resumed typing.

Almost half a year later and you were back where it all started. Your most peaceful spot next to the lake with your snacks unpacked on the blanket next to you. You stared out across the water letting your eyes unfocus and mind go blank feeling yourself relax almost completely for the first time in recent memory. Just for these next two days your weekend would be only for you.

Or so you thought.

You couldn't stop your eyes from wandering to the spot where Cell's egg had appeared and you were beginning to get the unnerving feeling that you were being watched just like back then. You could feel something that you couldn't put into words exactly. Like a pressure at the edges of your mind or a flicker of movement that was just outside your peripheral vision. It was energy radiating like a small sun that signified there was another in the woods with you.

You had the same feeling occasionally from your coworkers and people you passed on the sidewalk or at the grocery. It was as if you could feel people's auras even before you knew they were near although you had no idea if that was the right term for whatever it was. It was a lingering side effect of Cell's venom that, as far as you knew, was permanent this time.

You let out a shuddering breath you didn't know you'd been holding allowing your eyes to drift shut.

"How nice if you to come to me this time."

It isn't surprising to you, you're long past that, when you open your eyes to find Cell standing a few yards away. He was something far beyond what you could have ever imagined compared to that first night when he'd been born in your kitchen. Sculpted as if he were an ethereal forest spirit, maybe he was you had no idea, his features were entirely human now. It was a disturbing contrast to the rest of him which remained similar to that of an insect right down to his wings reappearing.

"What do you want?" you asked softly.

"A little late to be asking that isn't it?"

"Sorry I was a little busy the last few times I saw you."

He snorted, "And if I said I intended to reduce your little world to atoms just because I can? That you had eagerly helped me to attain the power to achieve such a thing, what then? Hm? Could you handle the responsibility of damning your entire race to oblivion in your final moments?"

You narrowed your eyes, "I don't believe you."

"Is that so?" Cell took a step closer, "Then what do you think I want?"

"I-I don't know. I don't even know what you are."

"I'm an amalgamation of different races passed on through previous generations determined by what type of surrogate they chose to complete their metamorphosis. In short, I'm an alien," he drawled out the last part at your blank expression.

"How did you get here? On earth I mean? You have to start from somewhere, right? You were an egg when I found you."

"Are you asking me how babies are made?" Cell's smile was pure evil as he intentionally ignored the rest of your question.

The questions kept pouring out of you like a flood afraid that at any moment Cell's accommodating mood would shift. Yet, he answered them all without anything worse than the occasional sarcastic remark. Cell didn't know how he'd ended up on earth but he believed that he'd been in stasis for a long time before you had discovered him. Possibly decades if not centuries buried in the soil only surfacing once his genetic match was born and matured enough for him to 'harvest' as he put it.

Cell explained that nearly every living thing gave off something called 'Ki' and that he had sensed yours one day around the time he had gained awareness. You hadn't believed him when he'd told you that he had only ended up in the forest entirely by chance where you liked to have your picnics but since he was being so open about everything else there was no reason for him to lie. It was a strange mixture of fate and his own biology that had brought you together on that day and it left your mind reeling.

It seemed that he also gained the knowledge of his surrogate race and that was why he had such a comprehensive understanding of your language and culture. That extended to your memories because Cell wasted no expense in teasing you about how many times you'd thought about him fucking you in the absence between his first and second forms during that part of his explanation.

"So this is your final form? You don't need to.. do that anymore," your face must have been dark red.

"Why? Could it be that you're disappointed?"

By then the sun was setting, it's oranges and pinks reflecting within Cell's eyes making him appear even more demonic, a single sharp canine poking out from his curled lip.

You hesitated a little too long without answering and the alien cackled at your expense, "You are. Fret not, little human. I still have a purpose for you. I did mean what I said before. About fucking you that is. I want to test out this form to it's full extent. I'm having many interesting new urges that I don't fully understand."

"You are?"

You gulped.

"I dreamed of you often while I was beneath the earth," Cell was close enough that you were looking up to meet his eyes while he spoke, "Before you were merely a means to an end but now I find you to be quite distracting as you take up a great deal of my thoughts. Even now just the scent of your skin is making me restless."

Cell lowered himself to one knee on the blanket resting his arm across it in a way that reminded you of a prince kneeling before his princess right before he confesses his love to her. This was certainly a fucked up fairy tale you'd landed yourself in.

 He's so handsome it isn't fair.

You wanted to touch him, rest your fingers along his jaw, and run your thumb over his plush lower lip. Instead you bit the inside if your cheek trying to hold onto your reason left paralyzed by your indecision to fight back or give in. You didn't protest when he reached for a strand of your hair that had fallen loose from it's ponytail taking it between his fingers. Vulnerable wasn't the right word for the way Cell was behaving. Nothing about him was vulnerable from his tall muscular form to his cold eyes that would always make you feel like prey. It was the way that he was too human in his mannerisms, it felt wrong somehow, like a doppelganger mimicking unfamiliar behavior.

Cell was never gentle with you before, he didn't give a shit about your limitations, and had just openly admitted you were a means to an end, so it should have been easy to hate him. It was also easy for you to close the distance and press your lips to his just to remind yourself of what he was. The last kiss you'd shared was a vulgar imitation of his tongue violating you with no interest in your enjoyment; a mockery of your own weakness towards him.

So why then, when you timidly pressed the tip of your tongue against the unyielding seam of Cell's lips, did he allow you access as naturally as any lover you'd had before. He didn't grab you and force himself on you this time, instead, slowly deepened the kiss to the point that if you'd been standing, your knees would be weak. When you pulled away breathlessly he didn't try to stop you remaining motionless as a statue.

"Why?" you whispered.

 Why won't you fuck me, use me, and leave me alone already?

"Do you still not understand?" Cell asked, "You're a match for me just as much as I am to you. That is the nature of the bond we share, girl. Whatever I am now is what you desire in a mate. My Perfect form is decided by your predispositions just as much as my lineage to ensure that my species will continue."

Your eyes widened as his words sank in.

"You want this too. There's no point in playing coy. It's obvious from your accelerated heart rate and how much you're leaking between your legs. You find me attractive, yes, but it excites you that we're alone and I could do anything I wanted to you. Whether you want me to or not."

It was appalling just how right he was.

The bond you shared with Cell was a violation that you'd never asked for, the deepest parts of yourself had been exposed, entirely without your knowledge or consent. It was worse than rape. It was unfathomable to imagine and it made you dizzy at the implications that he was practically grown for you. Because of you. This thing knew more about you than any human ever possibly could.

"Is that it then," you said, your lower lip trembling dangerously, bordering on hysterics, "I'm just some fucking alien incubator from now on? I quit my job and stay at home laying eggs for the rest of my life?"

"No. You would have a normal pregnancy for the first stage and then the child would develop a chrysalis after some time had passed. It would go through the same process as I did and not become aware unless it's genetic match were alive at the end of it's development."

That was a relief to hear when all your mind's eye could conjure up involved wriggling larvae covered in slime and it made you feel ill. Not that the idea of inflicting what you'd gone through on someone else was anymore appealing. You were responsible for furthering a race of parasites.

"What do I tell the people I work with.. oh fuck, my mom."

You could imagine the horrified expression she would give you if you turned up with a fat belly and no father in sight.

"I should also mention that the child will be quite small and would be barely noticeable if that's your concern. There could be a slight weight gain but nothing to draw attention. This wouldn't be ideal for me either. If too many people started asking questions I would be forced to act."

"Forced to..? What are you saying?"

"I would kill them, naturally."

You gasped in shock, "What the fuck."

Cell gave you the most simultaneously handsome yet evil smile, "That's enough talking. I've waited long enough to have you, y/n."

The sudden use of your actual name for the first time caught you off guard enough that cell easily had you pinned beneath him on the blanket with a single fluid movement. He was still smiling when you met his eyes nervously, "I thought you were letting me decide."

"I changed my mind."

Your complaint turned into a whine from Cell's suggestive grind against your clothed groin, the protective chitin there borderline painful, but you couldn't control your breathing after a few more movements like that against your increasingly soaked core.

"Fuck, Cell.."

"Hmm?"

You hated how composed he was. Outwardly unaffected while you were left squirming and on the verge of a heart attack.

 Does he ever fucking blink?

You don't see, but rather feel it happen, when Cell opens up between your legs and something big and heavy slaps against you. The most impressively terrifying organ had revealed itself from within Cell's body and you can't stop yourself from staring. With it's many ridges and bumps it was enough to make even the most seasoned Bad Dragon employee blush.

Cell let out a low rumbling chuckle at your approval, "See? You want this too," he gripped your pants and underwear in one hand dragging them down slowly, while keeping both of your wrists pinned above your head, "Even knowing what it means for you, you're already this wet for me, wanting me to fill you with my offspring."

"No," you said, the end of the word trailing into a moan when Cell's fingers circled your clit slipping lower and collecting your wetness before bringing them up close to your face.

"What's this?" he accused, as if you were a disobedient dog that had pissed on the carpet and he'd caught you in the act. Your eyes had barely focused on the transparent strands before he shoved those fingers into your mouth. You tasted clean and salty as he rolled the digits across your tongue in an unspoken demand for you to suck. So you did, not having much choice, not stopping until there was nothing left and his fingers were thoroughly coated in your saliva.

Cell immediately slid them all the way inside your swollen folds, circling and stroking against your most sensitive spot, preparing you for his cock. Satisfied that you wouldn't try to escape he let go of your wrists and dragged up your shirt, your nipples pebbling in the chilly night air, bringing a hungry look to Cell's unrelenting gaze at the sight of your exposed breasts.

You couldn't control how your body clenched around him remembering how you'd felt during his feedings, and his motions inside you grew rougher, forcing your tightening muscles apart. You mewled and bucked your hips against his hand trying to reach your climax faster only for Cell to pull out of you altogether. You practically sobbed from being left empty when you were so close but your disappointment was short lived.

Cell took his cock in hand lining up the sharply flared head with your entrance and your legs spread apart automatically just needing him inside you.

There was no wait or letting you adjust, just every ridge and bump splitting you apart all at once with a single press of his hips, turning everything inside your head white. Your orgasm was immediate from the sheer size of him and the over-abundance of texture stimulating every inch of your walls to the point of pain. Your mouth was open but no sound came out as your body violently fluttered and tensed.

Cell didn't allow you to recover, already starting to move, and it took every ounce of your willpower just to tolerate it.

Your mind was numb to everything but the feeling of Cell's cock brutally fucking into you, thinking back to the times before they were nothing compared to this. If you could think which was proving to be impossible aside from desperate pleas for Cell to fuck you harder, more, yes, yes, yes.

"Tell me you want me to breed you," Cell's grip was on your chin forcing you to meet his intense glare.

"Yes, fuck, I'm going to come again, please. Don't stop."

"Say it," he hissed bringing his thrusts down to short unsatisfying stabs that reminded you beneath the pleasure you were actually really sore already.

"Please, Cell, come inside me. I want you t-to breed me."

You screamed when he grabbed your legs and pulled you all the way down onto his length before filling your cunt to the brim with his release. It left a milky ring tinged with pink around the base of his cock that inspired him to violently use your limp body a second time, spurred on by animalistic instincts, flooding your insides to the point of it leaking down your ass and all over the blanket.

Cell stayed inside you for several seconds trapping his come to ensure the highest chances of putting a baby in you before he pulled out, still hard, and lifted your head up by the hair. The pain was already starting to set in and it made you feel sick to your stomach from the deep rooted throbbing low in your abdomen. Cell's cock bobbed in front of your face and you didn't even think about it, just set to work licking his come, cleaning him thoroughly while barely registering the metallic under-taste.

"Open," he ordered you, aroused by the sight of your little pink tongue working so diligently, he wanted to have your mouth next.

You thought your jaw would dislocate when he forced the head past your teeth while you struggled to sheathe them behind your lips. You hated to think what might happen if you accidentally bit him but he didn't seem to care. Not when your teeth scraped him or when your throat constricted trying to force him out. He just rocked his hips continuing to open you up to him until drool was hanging in thick strands from your chin and splattering your breasts.

Each time you gagged you felt more of Cell's come being forced out from below and it made you feel dirtier. You were handling him as best you could until he pushed in harder than before blocking off your throat and your air. You began to panic finding no mercy in Cell's face when you begged him with your tear soaked eyes to let you breathe. It was then that he came again inside your throat, leaving you no choice but to swallow it all or suffocate, feeling some of it come out of your nose.

It was idiotic to think that he would be gentle with you this time as you shoved back off of his hips coughing and choking on the remnants of his come.

You shot Cell an annoyed glare made ineffective by the come dribbling out of your nose and you angrily wiped it away.

"What's with that look?" he drawled, amused, "This is what you want. Anything I do to you is entirely your fault. You're quite perverse for someone so outwardly average I have to say."

 Asshole.

 Why did he always have to be right?

                                                             ⛧

It's been almost one year since that day in the woods and true to his word, despite being very near to giving birth, there are barely any signs that you're pregnant. You told yourself that you wouldn't become attached, this wasn't a situation of your choosing after all, you were just giving Cell what he wanted so he wouldn't eat your head or something.

You hadn't already thought of a name if it was a girl (or boy). You hadn't developed the recent habit of talking to your stomach in a ridiculous voice throughout the day when you were alone about whatever you were doing at the time. And most importantly you didn't find yourself drifting through the maternity section when you went to the market looking at baby clothes and furniture with a sickening longing.

"Do you think we should have potatoes or beets with dinner, tonight? I think both would be good, don't you?" you started to dig for the peeler in the drawer, "Dam-, I mean, dang it. Where is this thing. I swear I see it everywhere when I don't actually need it.."

"What are you doing?"

You screeched grabbing a wooden spoon and turning with it raised in front of you only to find Cell in the middle of your kitchen, arms crossed, giving you The Look. The one he always gave when he wasn't impressed with something you'd done which was pretty much most of the time. Since getting pregnant Cell had developed the annoying habit of appearing inside your house randomly.

"Jesus Chr-," you coughed, "I told you to stop doing that."

"You did," he said, not moving or caring.

It was strange to think that you were practically used to having Cell around by now, not at all unnerved with him being this close to you, as you put the spoon away and returned to preparing dinner.

"How are you feeling?" he asked eventually, "Any pain?"

"No. I'm fine just like yesterday and the day before. You know I can tell that you're close by right? I can sense your Ki or whatever you call it. If something goes wrong you'll know."

Cell hummed noncommittally, studying you without your knowing, gauging how close you were to giving birth. Judging from the activity of the baby he would assume another day at most.

"You know if you're just going to stand there the least you could do is help out," you turned finding that Cell had already disappeared leaving you to scowl at the empty space on the tile, "Of course, now, you leave."

 What does he even do when he isn't here anyway.

You felt a light flutter in your lower abdomen as the baby moved inside you as if it were agreeing and you smiled fondly resting a hand over it.

After dinner you followed the usual routine, shower, brush your teeth, and then stay up for at least an hour later than you should reading a story off of your phone out loud. You could tell that it liked when you did this, it always moved alot during the interesting parts, showing that it was listening. You wondered if Cell's mother was like this and why he'd ended up in the forest on earth as you drifted off to sleep.

You awoke before the sun was up upon hearing a strange noise, flipping on the bedroom lamp expecting Cell, instead discovering a tiny creature curled into the blankets next to you.

You stared.

And stared.

 Oh my God.

When it's eyelids fluttered and it looked at you for the first time with familiar pale pink eyes you knew.

"Hi," you whispered lightly touching one of it's chubby hands barely bigger than one of your fingers. It was a girl with much softer features than Cell, although she had the same chitinous body, she was mostly humanoid with a skin tone that matched your own. At the sound of your voice she gave you the most adorable smile, grasping at your fingertip, and your heart melted. Your daughter was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen and just for those precious moments you forgot about aliens and all the weird shit you'd gone through in the past year and a half.

You only had three days as it turned out until the baby's transformation began and on the morning when you went to check on her finding that familiar purple chrysalis in her place you locked yourself in the bathroom and cried for an hour.

Through all of this Cell didn't appear until you returned to the tree in the woods with a shovel in hand starting to dig in the same spot where you'd found his own chrysalis. You tried not to cry in front of him and failed miserably while you flung dirt a little harder than necessary in his direction. He said nothing to mock you as you buried your child in the earth, cheeks wet, and heart aching as if some deep rooted part of yourself had been torn out instead.

"Three years," Cell said, as you passed him heading back to your car, wordlessly.

"What?"

"It takes three years for the first stage of development to complete. If the surrogate is here and viable you may see her again in three years."

"Really?" you sounded pitiful, broken.

Cell was gone when you turned leaving nothing but the freshly disturbed soil and the sounds of the ducks on the water behind. Truthfully, you didn't want to see his face right now, he was the one who had inflicted this pain on you. You needed something to blame for what you were feeling and he understood this too. Of course he did.

 Always fucking right.

If it was three years you could wait.

You softly whispered her name and said your goodbye before getting back into your car and leaving the forest.

                                                                                                         ~Fin~

[the-masked-ram]

Blurred Lines- Chapter Two

CW: NSFW, College AU, Roommate AU, Dom/Sub Undertones, Gambling, Friends with Benefits, Enemies to friends, Hate sex, Impact play, Mild Breath play, Drugs, Alcohol, afab! reader

---

Chapter Two: Ground Rules

The apartment was amazing honestly. It definitely needed cleaning; it looked like an upscale bachelor pad. There were old food containers, dirty clothes lying around, and you didn’t want to know when he last dusted. But it wasn’t too much for you. You’d roomed with people, paid for places that were far more of a dump than this. You could see everything waiting for you underneath the mess.

The visit to the apartment made you eager to sign the lease. You couldn’t figure out why Touya seemed so happy with it. If he could afford a place like this, couldn’t he afford a maid service? But you wouldn’t question it anymore. You couldn’t afford to. This was your golden ticket to surviving college.

Two weeks later, after signing your lease, you were moving in. Heavy boxes weighed your arms as you climbed the stairs over and over. Your new roommate was nowhere to be seen after letting you inside, doing no more than pressing your shiny new key into your hand and walking off into the depths of the apartment. A glare found its way onto your face quickly. The only hope you had of moving the larger items was that Bakugou and Kirishima had offered to help.

You couldn’t let them help any more than that, despite their offers to help you finish. Your peace of mind would have forced you to thank them by buying food or paying them for their time, neither of which you could do right now. So, with a tight smile you waved them away as they reluctantly loaded up and you finished moving the boxes up far too many flights of stairs yourself.

By the end you were exhausted. Sweating badly despite the shorts and thin tank top you wore. However, all you could think of was how you were now moved into your new place, you were home. You had a key of your own, and the boxes filling your new room gave you a sense of renewal. Like this was a fresh start. With a deep breath you started the slow process of unloading your clothes. So right now, it was just you and some music to keep you company as you put stuff away until it was time for work. It wasn’t until an hour had likely passed, and you were far into unpacking, singing at the top of your lungs and still relatively poorly dressed in those cheeky shorts and that small tank top, that you heard the clearing of his throat. You started, blinking as you glanced over to Touya leaning lazily against your doorframe. His eyes lingering on your legs.

His gaze didn’t move, though he had to notice your attention on him. It lingered like a burning flame, stroking across your exposed skin. It caused goosebumps to rise and your stomach to squirm. Your bare foot hooked around your ankle as you tried to catch his attention another way. You cleared your throat and slowly, so achingly slow, his blue gaze flickered up your body, you duck your head nervously and murmured, “Ah, Todoroki. Sorry, was I loud?”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Alright, first thing, call me Touya, I fucking hate my family name.” He shoved off the frame and stalked into your room, you immediately stepped back as he said, “Next thing, we should go over some house rules and a schedule for when you can and can’t do things.”

He didn’t answer your question, but you wondered if perhaps the fact your music had been cranked up to an ungodly level had been exactly what prompted his desire for the ‘rules’ talk. You shivered in front of him, but it wasn’t from fear, it was from the way his eyes wouldn’t leave you. It was from the way they seemed to be snagging your soul and ripping it out through your chest. He was too much to look at like this. You couldn’t be this close to him. It felt like all the air was taken from the room. Like he was taking up the entire space. So, you did the only thing you could do, you nodded desperately, eyes wide, unable to glance away from him for a second. Unable to even blink. “Fucking cute,” he mumbled with an appreciative smirk curling his pierced lips.

He turned on his heel and left, only stopping long enough to glance back over his shoulder at you and tap his knuckle on the doorway. Once he was gone it was like a crushing weight on your chest was swept away too. You gasped in air greedily. Geeze, what was it about that man? Touya seemed to exert this oppressive pressure whenever he was in the room. You were never able to look away nor directly at him, or get near him, and he liked to push your boundaries in the most delicious way.

A way that had your thighs squeezing and your walls fluttering. Slick lined your panties, and you hated it, hated that somehow knew just how much you lusted for his gaze despite the way it made you nearly turn inside out. You also dreaded the fact that you now needed to face him after making such a fool of yourself. He was sitting on a recliner when you walked into the living room, one foot brushing the floor while the other was flung lazily over the arm. Scrolling through his phone with a look of disinterest, he glanced up once you entered, but took his time giving you his full attention, as he started typing something. You weren’t as irked as when he hadn’t been there to help unload. Though you weren’t sure if you had the right to be upset about that. He had never said he would do that. Perhaps you should feel more upset now, especially since he’d called you out here to talk to you. But also, this gave you a moment to observe him. It gave you a moment to get used to his presence without feeling suffocated.

So, you perched on the edge of the couch, waiting for him to finish, and glancing around at the sparse living room.

“You look like you’re about to take off at any time, like you might break. Like a little porcelain doll,” he let that word sit and roll over your spine, until you finally chanced a momentary glance at him. “Relax, babe. Nothing bad is gonna happen.” You scoffed and rolled your eyes, but avoided looking at him directly for too long, which only made his grin turn into a lopsided smirk. He knew just like you did that your moment of bravery was a bluff. His eyes raked your form with languid heat, his tongue slipping out to roll over his lip ring. You wondered how that tongue would taste? Immediately balking at how eagerly your lust laden thoughts had turn salacious. “Alright, little thing, you said you work Monday for six hours and then another ten hours the rest of the week spread out. Otherwise, it’s just your night classes?” the way his tone turned sharp and business-like had you snapping to attention, focusing on his words intently. You nodded, “Yeah, and I can cook your dinner ahead of time on nights I may be gone, to you know have some homemade pre-frozen meals, in case you didn’t want to order.” Your hand rubbed across the flesh of your thigh over and over, dimpling the flesh. Touya’s eyes drifted downward to follow the movement with a lazy intensity you didn’t think was possible. Your fingers curled into your palm and your nervous tick stopped almost instantaneously. He chuckled before turning back to the matter at hand. “Well, aren’t you helpful?” he patronized. “That’s very sweet. But I figured you’d make me lunch for every day of the week, and then three to five nights a week you could do dinner based on your schedule. I don’t eat breakfast.” Your eyes darted to the side only to then slide towards him under lowered lashes, hoping to shield yourself from the way he was staring at you, and nodded, “Ok. And I’ll do your laundry and keep this place spotless.” His grin stretched, “Don’t promise things that are impossible, babe.” Sighing, he leaned his head back on his shoulders before fixing you with a harsh and serious gaze. His relaxed posture changed, everything in him stiffened and he narrowed his eyes at you. There was something in him that changed from a relaxed predator to a dangerous beast. He was vicious right now, whatever he said next, he wouldn’t accept no as an answer. “W-what?” you asked, fidgeting. “Now to go over the rules. These are blanket rules and will affect both of us. Always knock-on bedroom doors and bathroom doors before entering, first one up makes the coffee, label your food if you don’t want it eaten, if you break it you replace it. This one is my personal rule for you, don’t come out of your room when I have a party,” he nearly snarled the last one and you saw a glimmer of how dangerous Touya could be if you crossed the line. You blinked, your jaw working around silent words trying to find an answer but unable to at the finality of his tone and the restrictions it put on you. “Why?” you asked. You didn’t argue, you just wanted a reason. You couldn’t argue with the way he stared at you, his blue gaze squinting, and his lip curled in a sneer. “I will give you a day’s notice before I hold a party at least, and if you need something all you have to do is text me,” he said, completely ignoring the question.

But you knew he heard it, had seen the way his jaw flexed at the single word. He didn’t like being questioned when it came to this. All you could do was swallow, the cool way he led the conversation had you nodding in agreement. His pleased expression made you realized what you had just agreed to. He’d have complete control over the household if you kept acting like a meek little mouse. “I knew you were perfect for this. Perfect to be here with me,” he murmured, the smirk pulling at his lips again. His eyes swept over you once more, lingering in places that only lover’s should indulge in. Once again, the stiffness left his muscles, and he was back to reminding you of a lazy cat. A big one though, like a lion out in the sun just waiting for it to cool off before it hunted. Before it became an issue and made a meal of you. Touya was dangerous, you just didn’t know why. Embarrassment flooded through you, nerves took over, and quickly rushed from the room. He cackled behind you and the sound followed you all the way to your room. Just who was Touya? Maybe it was time to keep an eye open on campus.

-Taglist- @arvandus

---- If you want to read up to chapter 4 of Blurred Lines (before it's all rewritten), want to get early access, or want some special original content check out my patreon! Link

[occult-roommates]

Congratulation, it’s a girl

After putting it off for months, Akva had to cave in, she had to get pre-natal care. Whether she likes it or not, a baby is going to be there in a few months, so better not neglect its health on purpose...And like, pregnancy is also really hard on the mother too, so better make sure everything is ok for her too. Jay was also with her, as he was spending the rest of the summer in San Myshuno in his family, mostly cause his 20th birthday was approaching in late July and he wanted to be with his folks. He would only return to Oregon around a month after that.

Ultrasound tech: Do you want to know the sex? Akva: No, not reall- Jay: Yes! Ultrasound tech: It’s a girl. Akva: I said I didn’t...Why do you even care Jay? That child is not for us, it’s for Paisley and Damian. Jay: I’m a curious bitch! Ultrasound tech: Could you please resolve your relationship issues elsewhere? Anyway, congratulation, your little girl is a perfectly healthy mermaid.

While it’s impossible to tell what another occults a child might be with an ultrasound, mermaids are pretty easy. A mermaid’s fish tail grows when they come into contact with water, and being in contact with water is pretty much all a fetus in the womb does all day. 

A little bit later, Akva needed to get some fresh air, so Jay brought her for a walk in a park near his childhood home, where the two had spent countless hours as teenagers.

Jay: You know Akva, I’m worried about you. I knew you were a mess before, but it’s gotten worse. Like, you used to be a track star and wanted to go to college and to do stuff with your life. Now you work a shitty minimum wage retail job and live with a bunch of losers in one of the worst district in the entire city! What happened to you? Akva: Losers?! You mean my friends?! And you fucking know what happened to me, you were there.  Jay: You’re just making me sad now. Like, just look at you. You didn’t want to be a lesbian, so you lied to yourself and tried dating guys and it backfired twice. Like one time left you pregnant and the other left you disabled while Khaled fucking died. And now you don’t want to be either of those things so you just do whatever that’s not recommended during your pregnancy while you just let yourself rot as if you died too. Akva: I can no longer run and I can barely swim. My entire life before that night were centered around those two things. If I can’t do either, what’s the point. Jay: Unlike Khaled you have the privilege to still be alive, so use it! Yes, sometime life doesn’t go your way ok! Maybe I didn’t want for my parents to get divorced when I was a kid, maybe I wanted to have clear skin, maybe I wanted to be born a gi-...greater...son...a greater son! Life doesn’t always go your way!!

And Akva started crying, as if she didn’t felt enough guilt already regarding the death of Khaled. She had literally bribed June during her vacation so she wouldn’t bring him up. This caused Jay to go into damage control, especially considering another thing he almost said. Which ironically is also something about himself he can’t accept.

Jay: You know, since you complained earlier that this tank top is the only shirt you have left that fit you, but can’t bring yourself to buy actual pregnancy clothes. Like, my sister had a baby two years ago and you seem to be the same size I think. I could ask her if she doesn’t mind borrowing them to you, which I don’t think she will considering she said my nephew is going to be her only baby. Akva: Are you crazy? I said I don’t want either of our family to find out! Jay: Ok then, I can tell her it’s for me. She caught me trying on her jeans once...In my defense I was just curious how women jeans feel like ok, don’t judge me. I thought she wasn’t home that day. Akva: There is so much things to unpack here I don’t even know where to start. Jay: You know, I think it’s ironic I’m the last person you dated before realizing you like women instead. Akva: Why? Jay: I-I don’t know.

Since the mood was starting to improve again, Akva decided to be a little bit nice and offer Jay to feel the baby. As he did, he started thinking about when the ultrasound technician revealed the gender of the future kid. “It’s a girl”. Why couldn’t it have been what Mister and Misses Ramdeen heard twenty or so years ago.

...Why couldn’t it have been her...

Prev - Next

[bunnyluvs-blog]

It has to be You. (Donnie x reader NSFW)

Elloooo my lovess, so this is a NSFW chapter add-on for the series "My Experiment" i did, this is 5 years into the future and you and Donnie are still together, hes 19 and you are 18. this is also made for females so the words girlfriend will be used, enjoyyy

You were away for a week in upper New York. You made some friends at your collage and they invited you to go with them for a week. You lived in a dorm for the past year, which, it was nice to have your own space but you weren't with your family all the time. The turtles, april, and Spliter were your everything but you also needed your own time. When you told Donnie that you werent going to live with him anymore, he understood but was a little upset that he couldnt wake to you every day anymore. You were coming back home today and you planned on surprising Donnie with you being there when he came back from a mission tonight. You planned and told his brothers about this so they wouldnt get over excited. You got back home and put your stuff down and unpacked from the trip and started to pack for the night you werr about to spend at your boyfriends place.

It was late, you were already back and so was Leo and ralph. Mikey and Donnie did a solo thing so they wouldnt be back till later. Ralph was asleep by the time they got home, while you and Leo were just talking. "WE'REE HOMEEEEE" you could hear Mikey yell as him and Donnie walked in. You smiled when you and Donnie looked at eachother. But, he didnt say anything? You were more surprised that he didnt comes hug you or get in his knees crying because your back home like they do in the movies. Instead he just grabbed you and took you too his room. No talking just dragging. Once you got there he sat you on the bed as he took off his battle shell. You sat there confused until he kissed you, hard. It wasnt anything like any of y'alls kisses before. It was hot, passionate, breathy, and fast. He didnt stop. He just kept on kissing you deeper and deeper. His hands found their way to your waist as he pulled you closer.

"You're fucking mine tonight. I had the worst mission ever, and then i come home too see my perfect hot as fuck girlfriend sitting in the couch just staring at me. Do you know how much this week has sucked. I couldnt see you after your classes, or the weekend. But tonight that all changes, your going to be all mine. But i would be able to hold back." Donnie said in the most scratchy voice youve ever heard from him. You nodded and pulled him in for more kisses, now you were needy. He started to slowly kiss and suck on your neck. Small bites here and there for fun. He ended up marking 7 different spots just on your neck and collarbone. You felt his hand slowly go uo ur back, pulling off your shirt, his finger draging along your spine making you shiver. Now you have to remember that this is your boyfriend and that he is incapable of doing small things, like undoing your bra, which you did for him. As soon as it fell off of you he started biting, kissing, sucking all over your chest. Small praises left his mouth everytime you made a small noise. "Your so cute, the way your chest move everything you let out a cute little moan just does something to me." This wasnt the first time yall have had sex, but this would be the one to remeber the most. Then just like that, your pants were off. Donnie kissed down ur tummy to meet in the center of your legs. Leaving hickeys all over your thighs as you squirmed around. Making sure every last bit of them were going to be covered in purple hickeys by the end of the night. He slowly moved your panties to the side and looked up at you for approval to start eating you. You nodded as his tongue started licking your clit. It was the first time he's did this. Youve gave him head before but you were always to worried about him taking you like this. But lord, you didnt have time to worry. His tongue going up and down at a semi fast paste made your eyes roll back. He put two fingers inside to get you even more ready, and you needed to get ready. Curling his fingers to hit right where you feel best. And he just kept in doing it. In and out in and out. Your moans filling up the room until you finished. Release waved over you as you pant, then you heard the sound of a ziper. You both were naked as he sat in the bed, telling you to come over and sit in his lap. You hovered over his cock, has he put his hands on your waist again and kissed your head. "I love you, fuck..i love you i love you i love you" and said as he slowly put himself inside of you. His dick reaching parts of you you didnt even knew you had. You felt amazing. Donnie waited until u told him to move. He might talk a big game but he's the softest dom you know. You told him you were ready, he stsrted slow, long, thrust into you. Both of your moans filled the room and ur arched your back, wiggling for him to go faster. He slowly started to go faster, filling your insides with his cock. Oh how you wanted this, how he wanted you. "Oh fuck your so perfect, your body is so fucking cute, your tummy..fuck.. its so soft and smooth, and your thighs and fucking delicious." He said with breathy moans inbetween of the praise. He started going faster, and hitting harder. Your build up was about to come undone and you wanted him so badly. "Donnie, im close" You said softly, almost like a whimper as he went faster and faster and faster. Until the knot came undone and you finish, as Donnie pulled out and finished aswell. You both sat there for a bit until Donnie got up to clean you both up. After cleaning you both laid down together. You snuggled into his arms and his arm holding you close. "Hmm, tomorrow we're staying in and spending all day together" You both enjoyed lazy days with one another so it was perfect. His fingers ran through your hair and he hummed. "That sounds amazing darling" You looked up at his and kissed him before saying good night and drifting off to bed, Donnie stayed up and bit just looking at you. "i love you so much my dear" he kissed you head and drifted to sleep

[thatblackravenclaw]

You're The Best Thing

Masterlist

author note: YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG I'VE BEEN WANTING TO WRITE THIS!!!! My excitement for this is beyond compare. I really really hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Sam Wilson x fem!reader

word count: 2.7k (my longest one yet)

song: Never Knew I Needed -Ne-Yo

warning(s): cursing, SMUT!!!!!, p in v, fingering, protected sex, oral (fem receiving), fluff

background info: everyone is alive, Steve didn't go back in time and stay there with Peggy, but still chose to retire and pass the shield to Sam.

For the way you changed my plans

“Sam, I would like you to show the new recruit around.” Tony says to me as he walks into the kitchen.

“Why me? You know that I have more stuff to do now that I’m Captain America, right?”

“Which is why you’re perfect to show her around. Now get to it rocket man. She’s coming up the elevator right now.”

I sigh before turning back to Bucky.

“Can’t believe I’m stuck giving the newbie a tour.”

“Maybe she’s cute.”

“Maybe she’s a child. You know how Tony does recruits. Look at the spider.”

Right as Bucky opens his mouth to respond, I hear the most heavenly voice I’ve ever heard.

“I’m actually 29, but at least I’m not a bitter old man like you.”

I turn around to see her full lips turn into a smirk at me before walking towards us. I have never seen someone so gorgeous in my life. I mean Nat is gorgeous, but this girl is gorgeous.

Her hips sway as she walks towards the kitchen and I can’t help, but to stare. Good Lord.

I shake myself out of the trance I’m in. I must stay focused. I was able to fuck around a bit as Falcon, but just from the one sentence she has said to me, she has me wanting to change my plans up a bit.

“So, Captain America, too busy being you or can you show this child around?”

“I don’t know. Is it okay for this bitter old man to show you around?”

“If you continue to be bitter then maybe I should just explore on my own.”

She’s even able to match my banter.

“Come on. I’ll even let you have one of my juice boxes Stark packed with my lunch today.” She says to me before I can respond to her.

Showing her around wasn’t half bad. She’s amazing. She’s from New Orleans, which is only a bit over 2 hours from Delacroix, her power is being able to multiply herself, she helped take down the Red Room with Nat, and her favorite food is seafood, more specifically, Crawfish.

I tell her about Sarah, my nephews, make fun of Bucky for a bit and then I show her where her room is.

Her bags and boxes are in the room, so I decide to leave her to unpack.

“Tired of babysitting?”

“No, just got Captain America things to do.”

“Mm, well, you know where to find me.”

“That I do.”

For being the perfect distraction

1 month later

“I know it’s a whole team of us, but Steve never talked about how hard it is to be him”

I see y/n roll her eyes before she beckons me over.

“Alright come here old sport. Sounds like you need a music break.”

“I can’t. I need to get the paperwork ready-“

“No. You need to get your ass over here and take a music break with me, because you’re gonna die from stress and I will be the last person to have been with you if you do and I will get blamed for your death, so come here.”

I roll my eyes and begrudgingly walk around the couch to the middle of the living room. A slow song starts to play, but that doesn’t seem to stop her. It’s actually one of our favorite songs, A Sunday Kind of Love by Etta James.

I wrap my arms around her waist, and she wraps hers around my shoulders. She was right, I really did need this. Being in her arms calms me down so much it’s ridiculous. I’m really starting to like her which was not a part of my plans. I was supposed to do the Captain America thing without romance. Steve was able to do it. I needed to focus on being a role model to people like me. I needed to show Isaiah that what I did was not a mistake, but she just came in here and took the idea that I had and of everything that I wanted to have and made me see that there was something missing. Fun, Laughter, Friends, Family, Love.

For the way you’re something that I’d never choose

But at the same time something I don’t want to lose

3 months later on a yet another life threatening mission

“Sam, if I multiply I could go in and save those people!” I hear y/n say through my earpiece

“okay, but the fire is quickly spreading, and you could die.”

I wait to hear a response.

“y/n, do you copy? Do not go in until I give you the all clear.”

Static, then boom, explosion from the 4th floor. Where the victims are.

Please don’t let her be up there. Please let her have listened to me for once.

I feel Pietro run by me. I look over to the direction he was headed and see the people I think y/n was talking about.

I run over there and make sure everyone is okay before I turn to Pietro.

“Where’s y/n?”

“She was right behind me.”

I turn to look in the direction of where he came from and see her. As I start to run over there she disappears in thin air.

She multiplied.  

How could she be so reckless? Why couldn’t she just listen to me just this once?

I hurry up and fly to the 4th floor. I make it through the fire as best as I can before looking around for her. I search for about five minutes before I see her lifeless body on the ground.

No. No. I refuse.

I pick her up and fly to the ground. I hear everyone’s voices, but my only concern is her.

She’s still alive, but her pulse is slow.

I quickly bring her over to the medic and they put an oxygen mask on her.

I don’t want to leave her, but I still have a job to do. I check on everyone else and make sure that there were no casualties. Thankfully everyone is safe. I tell the other Avengers to go to the compound and I’ll stay with y/n.

Once her pulse raises back up to normal I see her eyes flutter open. She looks around confused for a bit before reaching over to take off her mask.

“Told you I could do it.”

The way you smile and how you comfort me (with your laughter)

I must admit you were not a part of my book

But now if you open it I may take a look

You’re the beginning and the end of every chapter

2 weeks later

“Okay, but think about it, if there’s two of me having sex with someone then its technically a threesome because there are three people present.” She says to me.

“It’s just you though. It’s not like your twin or something. It’s literally just you multiplied, so no.” I reply while throwing back another beer.

I honestly don’t know how she came up with this topic. I just came into her room to vent about how I upset I was to find not only Bucky with my sister, but Bucky on a DATE with my sister when y/n decided that she just HAD to ask me this question.

Hearing y/n laugh right now is really the only thing holding me together. It’s so contagious that you can’t help but laugh with her. Everyone else feels the exact same way about her, but I think I’m falling in love with her.

You’re the best thing I never knew I needed

2 more weeks later

She’s out on a solo mission. I have never missed someone so much in my life. Life around the compound is so boring when she’s not around. I don’t even remember what it was like around here before she showed up. She turned everything upside down in the best possible way.

I told Tony that I felt like this mission was too dangerous for her to do. She should have at least brought Nat with her. Not that y/n isn’t capable of doing things on her own I would just feel better if she wasn’t alone.

A week later

She’s on her way back. The mission went successful and she’s on her way back. I need to tell her how I feel. I had no idea how deep my feelings for her were until I had to learn to live my daily life without her.

“Your girlfriend is back.” I hear Tony say to me as he walks past.

“She’s not my girlfriend.” I respond before picking up my pace and running outside to the landing strip.

As soon as she steps foot on the ground I start running at full speed toward her. Once I get to her I hug her while picking her up. I don’t let go for a good minute. Her scent was so overwhelming (in the best way) and something I missed after two weeks of being without.

Who knew that I could be

So unexpectedly

Undeniably happier

I put her down and interlock our fingers while walking into the compound. I don’t let her stop to talk to anyone because if I do I would lose my nerve.

I decide to take us to her room since it’s closer than mine.

I sit her down on the bed and stare at her for a bit.

“Okay, you got me here. Now what? Gonna have your way with me Cap?” she asks me while wiggling her eyebrows suggestively and letting out a short giggle. I know she’s teasing, but some part of me wishes she wasn’t.

“I love you. You were not a part of my plans at all. I was going to focus on my job and just get shit done, but you came here and flipped my world upside down. You’re always around driving me crazy, and I like it.”

I pause to take a breath.

“When you were gone all I could think about was you. I hate being without you. I fought off my feelings for so long. You are not someone I thought I would fall for, but I did and now it’s so clear, I need you here, with me, always.”

There’s a pregnant pause before she starts talking.

“I’ve loved you since the moment I first talked to you Sam.”

Words I never thought I would hear come out of her mouth. I sit down next to her and kiss her. I quickly learn that her kisses are as addicting as her personality. I gently lean her back and continue kissing her without parting from her lips. I could do this all day.

I feel her hands creep under my shirt which I take as a sign and reluctantly part from her. I take off my shirt and reach to take off hers. I start kissing around to find her sweet spot and whenever I find it I suck a hickey on her while her moans are egging me on.

Once I get down to her cleavage I unzip her bra from the front. Her nipples looked like they were begging to be sucked on, so I did, and it was probably one of the best ideas I’ve ever done. She let out little whimpers and I felt her try to gain friction from anything under me.

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll make sure to give you everything you need.” I say while pulling away from her nipple and moving over to the other. I reach down to her bottoms and take them off and feel the pretty panties she’s wearing underneath.

I palm over her clothed pussy while sucking on her nipple for one more minute before moving stopping my hand movement and moving my mouth down past her navel. Once I get her panties off I’m faced with quite possibly the prettiest cunt I’ve ever seen. She’s wet, but I can get her wetter.

“Sam, please. Please don’t tease me. I need you.” I hear her say exasperatedly.

“I gotta get you warmed up for me baby.”

I kitten lick her clit and feel her hips buck up towards me when I move my tongue away from her. I continue licking her clit until I swipe my finger through her lips, and I feel she has gotten more wet. Once I’m satisfied with how turned on I’ve gotten her I ease a finger inside of her.

I stroke my finger in her slowly while continuing the stimulation on her clit. Her moans have gotten a bit louder now and I refuse to tell her to keep it down. I want everyone to hear how I’m making her feel.

Her hips buck up against my mouth and her moans get quicker, signaling she was close, so I start to suck on her clit while pumping my finger faster.

She lets out the most beautiful moan I’ve ever heard while shuddering through her orgasm. I place a small kiss to her clit and stand up.

While giving her time to recover, I grab a condom out of her top dresser and finish undressing. Her blissed out look and the way the shade the light coming from her lamp makes her look ethereal has my dick is brick hard and I can’t wait any longer to be inside of her.

I stroke myself while looking at her. Her pussy all sick from my mouth and her cum and her hands holding on to her tits. A sight for sore eyes.

I tap the head of my cock against her clit and watch her jerk from the overstimulation.

She looks up at me and nods her head to give me permission.

“I need words, honey.”

“Please, fuck me.”

And that’s all I need to hear before I slowly slide inside of her. I hear her let out a low “fuck” as I do so. Once I bottom out a stay there for a bit to get her used to my size. She feels so nice wrapped around me. The throbbing of her pussy making me want to cum right then and there.

She tells me I can continue, and I slowly start to thrust. She lets out quiet whimpers with each stroke.

I pick up the speed after a minute and with each thrust I feel her sucking me back in. She has her legs wrapped around my waist bringing me closer to her which in turns lets me hear her moans in my ear that she’s been trying to keep down.

Her moaning my name is so sweet that it motivates me to move faster. I lift off a bit so I can put some distance between us and rub light, quick circles on her clit before I hear her scream my name and squirt all over me.

Now that was a sight for sore eyes.

Once I feel her relax I move and sit on the end of the bed and have her to sit on my lap facing me and ease back inside of her. I lean back on my elbow while holding her waist with my other hand and start pounding into her.

It’s not long before I feel my impending orgasm.

“Sam, please give me your cum.” I hear her say while looking down at me.

“Fuck” I say with a rasp. I speed up a bit before I hear her talk again.

“Cum in me baby.”

And before I knew it I felt myself tense up and cum inside of her. I try ease her off of me, but she puts her arms around me, holding me tight.

“Stay inside me for a bit longer? Please?”

I chuckle at how flustered she looks and tell her that I need to throw away the condom before it leaks, and she needs to pee before she gets a UTI. She sighs knowing I’m right and we get up to go do what we need to do. About 3 minutes later we come back to her bed, and she lays in my arms.

“You know that wasn’t it, right?”

[folkloreguk]

Moving Antics (M)

A/N: This was requested a while ago and I hope you will enjoy it! I always welcome feedback of any kind! Have a good day x

genre: smut, optional bias (m) x reader (f), oral (m receiving), unprotected sex, overstimulation (a tiny bit), dom!bias, very lowkey roleplaying??, reader wears a maid outfit (not in a degrading way)

words: ~ 5.4 k

tag list: @mochi-ficz (let me know if you wanna be tagged when I post new fics!)

People had told you over and over. Moving is a stressful, exhausting process. It would take a while for you to settle in. Until everything had found its perfect place, weeks could pass. At least that’s what everybody said. What they all failed to understand, though, was that being in love could make the most tiring experience fun. Was it stressful? Sometimes. Exhausting? Why don’t you ask yourself that, when you fell into bed like a walking corpse at night? But all it took was a glimpse at your boyfriend as he carried inside the box that said ‘anniversary gifts’ and it was all worth it. You were confident in one thing at least. In the settling in department you were both ranking foremost.

You had lived in the apartment for only a week, and you couldn’t have been more all-over-each-other. Somehow there seemed to be an unspoken challenge you had both taken on. Maybe you two could set a record for most surfaces in a flat someone could have sex on. Or perhaps you should have started marking the rooms and spaces you hadn’t been able to add to your list yet. There wouldn’t have been many left. At the moment, there was only one downside to being so head-over-heels in love. A lot of the boxes in the apartment had been left unattended, as if you only waited long enough, the things would start flying out of the cartons and miraculously sort themselves out while you could stay there, in bed with your lover between your legs.

But this wasn’t Hogwarts and you weren’t some magician. And so one rainy Saturday noon you decided it would be thatday. The day you finally put away all the things that were still in the boxes. Not that the day had been successful so far. It was 12 pm and you were in bed. The shower was running in the bathroom next door, and you wondered how you would convince your boyfriend and yourself that getting things done would be a worthwhile pastime. Telling yourself you would come up with a tactic with your eyes closed, you tricked yourself into daydreaming for a little while longer, cuddled in the blankets that still smelled like him.

When you heard footsteps approach, your mind snapped back to reality. He strut through the door like a nude model, searching for some clothes to wear. His smirk when he saw you eye him was prominent and made your stomach flip. It took every last will of yours to not ask him to come back into bed with you, forget all your earlier plans and live like you were the last people on earth.

“Do you want breakfast?” he asked, finishing his outfit by pulling a shirt over his head. “I’ll make you some.”

You hummed, starry-eyed at his perfection. “Thank you,” you said. Quickly, he kissed your forehead and then walked off, presumably in the direction of the kitchen. Twenty minutes later, at the kitchen table, you finally brought up your wonderful idea.

“I think we really should unpack some more stuff today,” you said, “Don’t you think?”

“You’re right,” he said, “We’ve really been procrastinating.”

“You can say that again,” you laughed.

“Although I wouldn’t describe our scientific research of the last few days as completely pointless.”

“Our what?” you asked. You were getting up to put away the plates of your late breakfast.

“Us testing which room of the house is the most fun to have sex in,” he stated, matter of fact. “I vote for the bathroom.”

“You just love the mirrors,” you grinned, and he mirrored it.

“I do,” he said. His arms snuck around your waist from behind. “Almost as much as I love you.”

“I love you too, babe,” you said, “You know, there’s one room we haven’t tried yet.”

“The office,” he said. You turned your head and you kissed him deeply. In agreement you hummed, your arms wrapping around him. He pulled you closer, hands ghosting over the back of your thighs and up to your hips. You felt like jumping onto the counter and having him there, again, just like you had done it two days ago. But then you remembered you had other projects for the day. If you gave in to him now, you’d end up back in bed for the rest of the day, probably. Guilt was already setting in at the mere thought.

“Wait,” you pulled away and said, “We have things to get done.”

His nod was dilatory but then he seemed to recall his own determination from around two minutes ago. You wished you could have motivated him otherwise, but you were already struggling to spur on yourself to be productive. Then, you suddenly remembered something. Your eyes must have widened in surprise because he furrowed his brows at you.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Stay here,” you announced, “I’ll make sure we get through with this today.”

And you were off to your bedroom. You pulled the box out from the far back of your closet. Memories flashed your mind, of when you and your boyfriend had been watching a show together. One of the characters had been wearing a provocative maid outfit, and you still thought about the way he had grinned at it, or how he had said he found it cute, which you believed translated to sexy, but he had been a little shy back then.

Long story short you bought one. And what better occasion to put it to use than now? You went all out, stockings and heels as well as your attempt at fixing your hair quickly, which you knew didn’t really matter, since you would want it out of the way if you were really going to be emptying boxes. You strut down the hall, catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. The black and white costume just about covered your ass, and on your chest was a cutout in the shape of a cat’s head. The ruffles of the material bounced as you walked, excited to see your boyfriend’s reaction.

“Close your eyes!” you shouted. “No cheating!”

“I never cheat,” he said. You rolled your eyes, remembering his video game antics from the past.

“Before you say anything…this is supposed to be a motivation for us to empty the boxes. If we do that, we can have our reward,” you said.

“What reward?” he asked, eyes still shut.

“Open your eyes and you’ll know,” you said. Oh, how dearly you whished you could have captured his face on camera.

“Babe…,” he said. Then his mouth just stayed agape, as he ogled at you shamelessly. Just because he could. Because he was just thatlucky to have you.

“Do you like it?” you asked.

“Yes. Of course I do,” he said. His tone was emotionless because he was way too busy sorting out his own thoughts in his head. “But do you really think this is a good idea? How am I supposed to focus on anything but you?”

“We’ll figure it out,” you said. “Don’t you want to feel accomplished at the end of it all? If we don’t start working now, we’ll just end up feeling guilty. Again. Come on, let’s do this.”

“Alright,” he said. “Let me have one kiss.”

You laughed and granted him that one wish. His lips lingered on yours for a while. You knew he didn’t want to pull away. Neither did you. But at last, he had enough control to remove himself from you. It was the office that still needed the most work to be done. Cardboard boxes were piled on top of each other, labelled with some sort of theme or room of belonging on the outside. When you looked his way, he was only eyeing your legs. But then you grabbed the closest box to you and handed it to your boyfriend, and he snapped out of his trance.

Believe it or not, there were up- and downsides to the maid costume in this situation. The pros included feeling unnecessarily sexy whilst doing an unbelievably humane task, not getting too warm since you were already wearing little clothing and having your boyfriend virtually drooling over your appearance. The downsides were mostly reduced to one word: heels. Climbing a ladder and balancing three boxes on top of each other in your arms was an arduous task to begin with. Now add the possibility of twisting your ankle on the top step of a ladder and crashing to the floor, probably breaking your back or worse. You really couldn’t endanger the prospect of the fun you were planning on having later by taking that risk.

That’s why you chose to abandon the heels somewhere on the floor about half an hour into the process. And you came to the conclusion that finally getting over and done with what you had been procrastinating for the last week wasn’t all that bad. You were a whirlwind, running from room to room to make sure everything had its place. At some point he had turned some music on, and it was making everything even better. After all this time, you finally had your own place to decorate however you desired. As you admired how nicely things were coming together, you hummed to yourself quietly.

You weren’t sure whether he was having as much fun as you were. Especially not when you walked past him in the doorframe, carrying four pillows. Your ass – maybe not all that accidentally – brushed against his front as you entered the room. Innocence and feigned ignorance were on your face but you noticed exactly the way his eyes dwelled on you for a little longer until he got back to work.

But everything you could do he could do just as well. Fifteen minutes later, you were occupied with stacking books onto a shelf. Wanting them to stand in a very specific order turned out to be more time-consuming than you had anticipated. You heard his steps behind you, assuming he was going to walk past you. Suddenly his lips brushed against your exposed neck.

“Remember this song?” he asked. You hadn’t been focused on the music for a while now, but of course you remembered. “Remember when I fucked you to the beat of this? Because I do.”

“Babe,” you said. There was a little part in your brain that had the glorious idea of him having you right there, against the bookshelf. You wouldn’t even need to remove your clothes. With him, it took nothing but a few magic words and you felt like giving him all of you. No. It’s not time for that yet. Your rationality vanquished that little avid thought and pushed it away, back into your unconscious where it had come from. It wasn’t gone yet, only not so urgent anymore.

“You’re right,” he said. “We’ll save that for later. Just wanted to remind you of how much of a good time we can have.”

You only shook your head and grinned as he walked off, pretending to be blissfully unbothered. What goes around, comes around, after all. And you deserved that for pushing up against him earlier. It took a minute and you got back to sorting your book titles. Time passed surprisingly fast when you were being productive. Box after box emptied itself, almost as if your wish for magic powers had become reality. But it was just two people, who were so excited about their reward that they forgot to even take a proper break in between the chaos. And soon you were down to the last cardboard box. It was full of decorations you didn’t need for the current season.

Just a few more climbs up and down the ladder to the very top of the closet and you were done. He stood next to the ladder, handing you the things so you didn’t have to go all the way down each time.

“Last one,” he said, giving you a box with holiday lights. Successfully, you placed it in its new spot. When you finally made eye contact with him, he was already staring at you like you were the only thing in the room worth looking at. To be fair, from where he stood, there wasn’t much left up to his imagination. With your stockings on display, his eyes could probably go all the way up to your garter belt.

“Is this angle too revealing?” you asked.

“Absolutely,” he said, making you laugh. Smirking, he took your hand as you stepped off the ladder. You stumbled into his body as you grinned at each other. You both had the same thing on your mind, without a doubt. It was like a little inside joke you had made up just now, making you flirt through looks and small touches. His hand rubbed the small of your back as he bent to your ear.

“My pretty maid, haven’t you worked enough for the day?” he asked. “All that teasing you did today must have been soexhausting.”

You nodded overly seriously, as if riling up your horny boyfriend was physically tiring work. “I hope I did a good job. Did I?”

“No one else could have done it better,” he said. “Now let me treat you, baby.”

You hummed with your mouth already too close to his to say anything. Then your lips finally crashed onto his. It was a little ridiculous how much you missed his touch after only hours of being without it. People had told you you’d get tired of being with each other all the time. But it had been years and you still wished you could have cuffed his wrist to yours because you loved him just that much.

Your tongues fought playfully as you pushed him against the closet front. Small noises came from both of your mouths, quietly agreeing that this was what you had been waiting for – more or less patiently. Your hands became busy with the buttons of his flannel. When you came across his bare skin underneath instead of a shirt, you smiled into the kiss. Every layer less to remove meant you were one step closer to what you wanted.

“We’ve never done it in here,” you muttered against his hungry lips. “That table looks nice, doesn’t it?”

He grinned. Your hands had already messed up his hair, but nothing came close to his dark eyes in moments like these. His look never failed to make your heart skip a beat while you wondered how you had ended up with the most handsome guy in the world.

“Will you think of us, if you ever sit there and work in the future?” he asked, leading you over to the office table. He dropped his flannel on the ground on the way.

“I always think about us,” you said. “But you can make sure this one stays especially prominent in my memory.”

“There’s nothing I’d rather do,” he said, and kissed you again. Your ass was backed against the edge of the table and one of his legs pushed between your thighs. It made you whimper quietly in anticipation. He touched the little part on your thighs that was bare, playing with your garters. With your eyes closed, his tongue on yours and his hands being so close but so far from where you needed him, your head spun with dizziness. He was like a drug, like alcohol dripping straight from his lips and the more you kissed him, the less control you had over yourself. His attention gave you loose lips and the impulse to be risky, all whilst feeling so high up in the clouds you weren’t sure you’d ever find your way back down. You hissed when he pressed his fingers against your underwear.

“You’ll keep the dress on,” he said. “Will you?”

“Of course,” you obliged. “If that’s what you want.”

“Good girl,” he said, and he pulled aside your panties to slide his finger over the slickness that had formed between your thighs. As if on command, your hips moved closer to his hand as you whimpered at the too gentle friction. All afternoon you had been thinking of his hands on you. When you had watched him peel away the tape from the boxes, when he was taking your hand to help you down from the ladder and when he had run his fingers through his hair absentmindedly – all you could think about was how much you wanted those hands to grab your hips and for him to have his way with you.

“Take these off,” he ordered. His stern but gentle voice turned your insides into mush. It made you behave almost like a robot, no ifs ands or buts. When you usually liked to tease him, you knew not to test your limits when he spoke in this tone. Your underwear dropped to the floor and you kicked it a few meters away. Again, his hands ghosted under your dress and found your center. You felt like your knees would buckle from the way he rubbed small circles on your clit. Moaning quietly, you wrapped your arms around his neck for support, leaning your forehead against his chest for a moment. You let out small huffs and whimpers against his skin and nuzzled especially close to him when he touched that one special spot for a few seconds.

“Look at me.” He watched intently as your eyelids fluttered like your eyes were going to roll to the back of your head. You tried your best.

“Put your hands on the table by your sides,” he said. You hummed in disapproval but didn’t dare say so. After all, he could have also told you to put them on your back. And holding on to a wooden edge was still better than not holding on to anything, when you felt like a child standing on its feet for the first time. When he hooked his free hand under your thigh, lifting up your leg a little, your grip on the table tightened. You swore under your breath when he plunged two of his fingers into you. He curled them, pushing hard against your sweet spot and you curled your back in response.

All day you had gone without any sort of attention, when your head had been so full of things you knew you could do with him. The most release you had gotten – which was basically no release at all – was from pushing your legs together tightly when the dirty thoughts had become too much for your brain to handle. You knew it was your own fault for setting yourself up with this challenge. But now with your chest heaving and your head feeling like a tsunami of emotions was raging inside of it, you didn’t regret it as much as you thought you would two hours ago. Maybe you should play this waiting game more often, instead of jumping onto each other any chance you got.

“You look so hot like this,” he said. At the sound of his voice your eyes opened. Those eyes. While they usually held loyalty and playfulness, they now only spoke of authority. He used his thumb to rub your clit whilst his fingers were still inside of you, making you feel like floating. You were his favorite sight, by far. Above all times he watched you, from waking up in the morning to falling asleep in his arms at night, right now was the most mesmerizing. Your parted lips were the entrance to heaven and the glow in your teary, desperate eyes was putting the evening sun to shame.

“I’m so close,” you moaned. Your chest was alternating between short puffs and not breathing at all. Maybe your brain was too focused on the bliss you were chasing to care about breathing for now. You couldn’t blame yourself.

“Don’t make a mess, baby,” he said.

“No, I won’t,” you said. “Can I touch you when I come, please?”

You gave him your most entreating eyes, knowing that even though he liked telling you what to do in the bedroom, not even the strictest boyfriend was immune to your puppy eyes. You suspected that if he had declined, you might have held on to him anyways. Too overpowering was the clamor inside your head that was telling you to be close to him.

“Only when you’re coming,” he said. “Not a second earlier.”

You nodded obediently as your eyes shut again. Good thing you were mere moments away from just that. His fingers moved quickly, now that he knew how close you were to your high. It robbed your breath all at once. And it did the job, after a short while. You whined and arched your back, your hands flinging around his shoulders. Your little noises came out muffled against his skin as you closed your legs around his hand. He barely moved his fingers anymore, but kept the pressure on your most sensitive spots, making sure you could relish in every last second of your orgasm. Only after a while your grip on him loosened, and you realized how your nails had been digging into his skin.

“Sorry,” you said, rubbing over the moon-shaped marks on his shoulder. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, baby,” he said. When he removed his hand, you shuddered one last time, but missed his touch already. His magic was always working on you. Even when he had just made you come, the mere sight of the bulge in his pants, ready to spring free, made you want to pull him right into your body again.

“You came so fast today,” he said. Softly, he kissed you, but you noticed the hint of hunger that he must had been feeling as you were coming down from your high.

“That’s what you do to me,” you admitted. “Do you think you’re the only one who felt tortured all day long? It was driving me crazy, too.”

“You seemed to have a lot of fun, messing with my head,” he said, smirking.

“You’ll find that it was worth it, after this,” you said. He raised his eyebrows in question. You were already stepping forward, dropping to your knees in front of him. Like a child on Christmas morning, his eyes lit up at the sight of you.

“Aren’t you the prettiest maid?” he asked, the question obviously rhetorical. To him, you were the prettiest person in the whole universe. You tugged on his pants and pulled them down, along with his underwear. Your mouth watered at the sight of his member, hard and red from all the waiting he’d had to endure. The way he looked at you from above made you feel small, but he stroked your hair out of your face gently and you knew this was exactly where you wanted to be right now, and any other day.

“Hands behind your back,” he said. You smiled and did as he said, holding your right wrist with your left hand on your back. He caught on to your reaction right away.

“You don’t even mind, right?” he said. You were already sitting straight, mouth open, your tongue protruding slightly. “You like it when I make it more difficult for you, don’t you?”

You only nodded and hummed a small yes, then he placed the tip of his dick on your tongue. At first, you only closed your mouth around it, not taking more of him. Your tongue licked over the swollen tip almost shyly. He groaned as he watched you test the waters. After all, he was the one who could control what you did to him. For now, however, he seemed to leave you your freedom to do what you felt like. You pressed your tongue flat against the underside of his cock, licking over the tip ever so slowly. Then, you sunk your mouth further onto his length, taking as much as you could. It was so quiet you only noticed his uneven breathing as he eyed you from above.

“Shit, you’re so good for me,” he said. “Now stop with the teasing, will you? You know what happens if you don’t.”

You knew exactly. And so you shifted from your slow movements to quicker ones. You made sure to keep your tongue on him, especially when you moved your head away, swirling it around the tip now and then. His moans were music to your ears and only motivated you further. You had always loved his voice, when you sang to the song on the car radio or hummed his latest favorite song under the shower. But nothing compared to the way his voice sounded when you sucked him off. He seemed to be the most unrestrained then, not caring who heard him because he was way to obsessed with you sitting by his feet. The way he looked at you then made your stomach turn in pleasure. He didn’t even need to say anything or touch you. His overseeing eyes alone made you want him more than anything else.

His fingers in your hair curled, pushing your head further down on him. You focused on not gagging, your eyes closing. Tears brimmed behind your eyelids, but you were determined not to let them fall. Instead, you opened your lips a little wider and stuck your tongue out to make it easier for him to use your mouth however he desired.

“That’s a good girl,” he said, sighing in relief. You were awaiting treatment a lot rougher than the one he gave you, though. He thrusted into your mouth rather slowly, giving you enough of a break to remember to breathe. When you looked up at him with your sweetest eyes possible, his expression was a mix of strain and pleasure. You suspected he was trying not to overdo it just yet.

“Baby…can I fuck you or is that too much for you?” he asked. You perked up at his request. When you started humming around his length, he pulled away to let you speak.

“Please,” you said. “Fuck me. On the table.”

“Alright, my baby’s making the rules now, is she?” he said. “Come here.”

“I thought that’s where you wanted me to remember you, wasn’t it?” you asked, getting up.

“You’re right,” he said. You sat down on the edge of the office table with your legs parted for him to stand between them. Just once he kissed you. You wanted him to hurry, so you linked your heels behind his back, pulling him closer.

“Take me like a good girl.” He ran his cock over your slick folds, and he groaned when he felt your warmth on him. In response you nodded willingly, unable to wait a second more for him. Luckily, he didn’t plan on dragging out the anticipation any longer. With ease he slid into you, finding a familiar rhythm right away. As if you hadn’t just come ten minutes ago, you whimpered pathetically at the satisfaction. You leaned your weight onto your hands behind you, watching his cock enter you over and over. There was no limit to how many times you could have him inside of you. Every time it felt the same. Like he was completing you, all whilst simultaneously ruining you. His thrusts were sharp and as you raised your legs and changed the angle slightly, your eyes rolled back for a moment.

“Harder,” you asked, even though you were already overwhelmed.

“You want more?” he asked. You hummed a yes and nodded quickly. His grip on your waist tightened as he pulled you closer to the edge of the table. He didn’t disappoint. He never did. Swiftly, he pushed your legs further open and pounded into you, making your body shake every time his hips slapped against yours. It drove you borderline mad. A part of your brain urged you to praise him, to let him know what he was doing to you. But then, those unspoken words between you were inconsequential. You didn’t need to tell him how good he was. He could read it in every part of your body. He saw it in the arch of your back, in your curled toes and in your lip that was captured between your teeth. He heard it in the way you moaned and said his name like he was your savior.

Plus, you would tell him all about it afterward. But that wasn’t what your mind was focused on momentarily. It was the way he hit your sweet spot every time and you could barely breathe normally amidst your whimpers. You hadn’t even introduced yourself to all your neighbors yet, but they most certainly had taken notice of your arrival in the new apartment.

“Can you use your hands for me?” he asked. “Show me touching yourself, baby.”

His words and the look of dominance in his eyes was all it took, and without second thought your hands went to your center. You sucked in a breath at the added pleasure. It was almost too much at first, but then you let it all in. Like a wave was crashing over you, your eyes closed, and you hummed from the intensity.

“That’s it. Make yourself come again,” he said. “You can do it again.”

“Yes,” you said, almost breathed with the weakest voice. Your body had other things to focus on at that moment, letting your vocal chords do whatever they felt like. You clenched your walls around him and the knot in your stomach tightened with every little circle you drew on your clit. His usually tender eyes were everything but that as he watched you revel in the pleasure.

“So fucking hot,” he groaned. You tried hard to uphold eye-contact through fluttering eyelids and furrowed brows. “Good girl, keep going. Tell me when you’re coming.”

You hummed a yes as one of his hands cupped the side of your neck, the other remaining on your hips so he could push your body against his own with every thrust. After all this time of being with him you knew what it meant when his moans became higher pitched and he seemed to not realize his mean grip on your skin – not that you minded. You loved seeing the marks he left on you, especially when you had nowhere to be the next days. It always made him hungry, when he saw the dark spots on your skin, like a fading memory of what you had done.

A curse fell from his perfect lips and his thrusts turned sloppy as he came inside of you. His face, all twisted in bliss and from exhaustion, was all you needed.

“Stay inside of me. Just for a little while, please,” you plead, fingers on your clit rubbing at the quickest speed you could muster. “I’ll come if you stay.”

“I’m right here,” he said, slowing his actions until he was just filling you up, but now moving anymore. “It’s okay. Come for me.”

Just having him there, stretching out your walls and making you feel so close to him was all you really needed. And his words of affirmation sent you over the edge in no time. It was a toe-curling, mind-bending surge that overcame you at your release. Stars danced delightfully behind your closed eyelids while you tried to process all of it. He gripped your hand that was touching your clit and pressed it down, urging you to go on for a little while longer. You whined in sensitivity, feeling like your legs would give in, even though you were already sitting down. For just another while, he dragged out your orgasm as you struggled to control your overwhelmed senses. He distracted you by bending forward and letting his lips graze yours.

“You did so good,” he said. “My pretty maid.”

You whimpered and then sighed when he finally lifted your hand away from between your legs. Only then you could scrape together some words.

“We both did good today,” you grinned. “And I mean not only the last half hour.”

“Agreed,” he said. “Tomorrow we could tackle those last boxes in the kitchen. What do you think?”

“Can the maid outfit make another appearance?” you asked.

“I was hoping it might,” he said, kissing you softly. Your tired limbs and mind welcomed his gentleness as your hands went to his hair. You could already guess how the next day would go, then. But truth be told, you didn’t mind it one bit.

[keanureevesisbae]

Ever After Boutique - chapter 10

Summary: Frankee regrets her decision.

CEO!Henry Cavill x Frankee Newhouse

Wordcount: 1.6k

Warnings: some mentions of flashing and groping. Some nakedness

Masterlist // Ever After Boutique Masterlist // Previous chapter

The work is fucking terrible. I have never hated a workplace this much. The fact I’m being groped on a daily basis by perverted old men, have one co-worker who is moronic and doesn’t understand a single thing I tell him and that combined with the fact customers are dirty assholes as well thinking I'm the one for sale, makes me realize mister Burke is a sleazy old man. I fear that if I were to work here a day longer, he might flashes his dick. He seems like the type of pervert to do that and not taking any chances, I decide to quit.

After four agonizing weeks.

And I realize I only took this job to never ever face Henry again, but in all honesty, I loved working there. Ever After Boutique was the family I o so miss right now.

After I mindlessly strolled through New York City for a while, I somehow end in front of Ever After Boutique. I could do it… I have been texting the girls every once in a while, of course never telling them about the dumpster fire I worked at. No, according to the texts, working as an assistant manager was amazing.

I push open the door, only to discover it’s pretty in the boutique. The girls are working their asses off, running around to make sure the customers are being helped, but Vivvi and Chrissy drop their boxes and rush over to me once they see me.

‘Oh my, we missed you so much,’ Chrissy says, clinging onto me.

‘You look so tired,’ Vivvi says. ‘Have you been eating well?’

I missed them so much. Vivvi’s comment and Chrissy’s hug almost make me tear up. ‘I’m fine. You just seem so busy here, I’ll come back later.’

Right before they can say something along the lines of that I need to stay, Leona exits the backroom and smiles widely when she sees me. ‘Newhouse, with me,’ she says. ‘Chrissy, Vivvi, make sure the boxes are unpacked, there is someone behind the counter and the dressing rooms are clean.’

‘Done!’ The two of them spread out over the store and I walk over to Leona.

‘I was just wondering how you guys were, but you’re busy,’ I say. ‘I don’t want to slow you down.’

‘We are indeed very busy,’ Leona says, ‘and that’s why we need you. No one can fold clothes as fast as you can. Come on, with me.’ Like I’m some sort of puppy, I walk behind her and like that, we are secluded from the hectic back in the boutique. ‘The job isn’t treating you well,’ she says. ‘You look drained.’

‘Mhm.’

‘I know why you took that job,’ she then says.

That takes me by surprise. ‘What?’

‘I saw it coming, with the way you and Henry were. Normally, he’d fire someone like you in a heartbeat, however you stuck around way too long, a clear sign he was pretty into you. Fold that.’

As I’m folding the pile of clothes, Leona continues.

‘You taking another job, seemed weird, especially because Henry had been telling me about expanding the place. Opening another location, or literally expanding this place, by buying the floor above, so we could sell men and children’s clothes. He told me he wanted to make you assistant manager if not manager, because you could handle it. But then he didn’t show up anymore and on your last day here, I saw you two kissing near his car.’

Oh my gosh…

‘So when you were gone, I confronted him and he kinda spilled the beans on what happened. The stuff you did here—I heard you and him both deep cleaned the place, for which I’m forever grateful—the day after that, when you made him open up and how that all scared him.’

My cheeks are burning up, because my boss knows I had sex with the bigger boss in this particular room. I clear my throat. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Why?’ Leona asks. ‘For falling in love? Honey, it’s okay.’

‘No, I’m sorry for quitting.’ I stop folding the pieces, as I look to the side to Leona. ‘I shouldn’t have taken the other job. The place I worked at fucking stunk. It was terrible. I should’ve been more mature and confronted my problems, not go out of my way to avoid dealing with them.’

Leona sighs. ‘It was that bad there?’

‘Bad isn’t even enough to describe it. When I call it horrendous, it’s an understatement. I even quit today.’

She nods. ‘Well, normally I’d say that once you quit, you quit forever, but I can see this choice of yours was made purely out of fear and slight ignorance. Besides, you are the best employee we’ve ever had here.’

Oh dear… ‘Is this what I think it is?’ I ask, slightly hopeful.

‘You want your job back?’ Leona asks with a smile. ‘The offer stands for the next minute.’

The easiest choice I have ever made. ‘Of course, of course! I’ll take it,’ I say.

‘On one condition.’

‘Anything!’

‘After you finished here, you go talk to Henry. Clear the air.’

✰ ✰ ✰

Godfrey was happy to see me, because he hugged me tightly when he saw me on the doorstep, however I’m not too sure if Henry is gonna share that same enthusiasm as his butler. I end up in the private pool and I hate the fact Henry has this, including a sauna, inside his house. How on earth did he think he was the loser of the family? In my family, he would be considered the absolute champ.

I see him swimming a lap and I walk towards the edge of the pool. His back is strong, I can see every muscle as he swims. Gosh, this man. He stops near the same edge I’m standing at and he looks up. ‘Miss Newhouse,’ he says, not fazed at all, which either means Leona called him to tell him about me going here or he just does an excellent job hiding it. Weirdly enough, I suspect it's the latter. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘Telling you I quit my other job and I’m working at Ever After again.’

He gets out of the pool and I try not to get distracted by the fact Henry is shirtless, wearing some pretty tight trunks. ‘I see,’ he says. ‘Eyes up here, miss.’

Oh dear, I am totally staring, which is rude and incredibly perverted. Maybe I should’ve stayed at the other boutique. Would fit right in.

‘I’m sorry.’

‘For what?’

‘For staring, for leaving, for not talking to you like a real mature woman would do. I am so terribly sorry, Henry. The real reason I left was because I was scared. Scared you didn’t want me anymore. Scared of facing you and… Despite the fact I mostly throw sarcasm and some borderline mean stuff towards you and vice versa, I realized that not seeing you wasn’t an option anymore.’

Henry sighs deeply, before he makes eye contact with me. ‘Join me in the sauna,’ he says. ‘We’ll talk there.’

Okay, that’s a good sign. I think? I watch him walk towards the sauna and as he opens the door, like the real tease he is, he steps out of his trunks right before he gets in. I’m almost one hundred percent sure this is a positive sign.

I strip out of my clothes, neatly folding them up, before I walk towards the sauna. I open the door and I spot him on the wooden bench, taking a whole lot of space. I close the door behind me, leaning against it. ‘Are we good?’ I ask him.

He nods. ‘More than good,’ he says. ‘I’m so sorry for not being mature enough to face you,’ he says. It’s soft, almost like he doesn’t want me to hear it. ‘I shouldn’t have avoided you like I did. After I told you about the things I haven’t thought about in years, I felt this vulnerability. I felt exposed. Facing you meant facing the stuff from my past.’

‘I understand.’

‘So for that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for every shitty thing I have done to you.’

I bite my bottom lip, walking over to him. I stand in between his thick legs, placing my hands on his shoulders. ‘I am sorry for leaving and all the other shitty things I have done to you, because I know it’s quite a lot.’

He chuckles and it even reaches his eyes, making him look a lot less like crap. ‘Yeah, that’s true. For starters, you hitting me with your umbrella.’

‘I apologized for that,’ I exclaim. ‘Over and over again. You on the other hand have never apologized for stealing my cab.’ When I see him laughing, his shoulders shaking as he leans his head back against the wall, I let out a snicker too. ‘So, we’re all good?’

‘We’re good,’ he confirms. ‘Just promise me you’re not gonna leave Ever After again. Don’t know if I can handle that.’

‘I promise, as long as you promise to not shut me out again.’

‘Promise.’

‘And a little birdie told me you were thinking about expanding the boutique and make me assistant manager. Just so you already know, I’d love that job, so please don’t hesitate to offer me that job.’

‘Leona…’ he groans. ‘She seriously told you that?’

‘Yes, but please, don’t feel obligated to offer me right now. I was just joking.’

He smiles. ‘Come on, sit,’ he says, his tone soft and deep.

I straddle his thighs and wrap my arms securely around his shoulders.

‘What’s going on inside your pretty head?’

‘Nothing,’ I whisper. ‘Just that I missed you a whole lot. That’s all.’

‘I missed you too,’ he admits. ‘You got anywhere to be at tomorrow?’

I shake my head. ‘No, I start on Monday again. Why?’

Henry squeezes my bottom. ‘Because you know… You misbehaved.’

‘You’re gonna regret that,’ I chuckle, so not meaning it, because with the way my heart rate is going, I am already waiting for what comes next.

He smiles, before he kisses my lips. ‘I don’t think I will.’

✰ ✰ ✰

Ever After Boutique taglist: @diegos-butt // @thelastsock // @crazybutconfidentaf // @chaiwithchrisevans // @nothingbettertosay81 // @funfickgirl22 // @oddsnendsfanfics // @omgkatinka // @myloveforhenrycavill // @lyrarodriguez // @enchantedbytomandhenry // @a-little-counter-esperanto // @liecastillo // @sofiebstar // @sunshine96love // @abschaffer2 // @greensleeves888 // @thereisa8ella // @islacharlotte // @toomanystoriessolittletime // @needmorereading // @aami98 // @pterodactylterrace // @summersong69 // @gearhead66

[hanjizung]

♡ Dreamy Welcome. ♡

Lee Minho x Reader.

Word count:  4.4K

♡ Warnings ♡: SMUT; (mentions of) orgasm control, fingering, masturbation, (a bit of) exhibitionism, creampie, breeding kink, basically just love making, pet names.

Hello! im back with another request from when i reblogged this promp list ! [8) “If you’re going to act like a little brat then I’m going to treat you like a little brat.”] hope you enjoy!

You had been missing Minho a lot since he went on tour, missed everything about him; his voice, his laugh, his smile, the way he called your name, how he hugged you and kissed you on the forehead after teasing you… His whole absence felt weird, it wasn’t killing you but you missed him a lot, you needed him back as soon as possible.

There was an unwritten list of things you wanted to do with him once he was back; first you had to hug him, tell him how much you had missed him while kissing his face and making him feel a little shy from all the affection you were giving him in front of his members, then you would steal him and take him to your house for a movie night where the only thing you would actually focus on is going to be take care of him, massage him if he wants, play with his hair and cuddle with him on your couch until he fell asleep, and the last thing on your list was to make him fuck you senseless.

Of course the two of you had the occasional phone sex, it was mostly him hiding in the bathroom between practices and telling you to touch yourself for him, moaning his name but never cumming, because he said that he wanted you to cum on his cock, he wanted to be the one to give you an orgasm that would have you seeing stars.

That was the promise he made during one of those calls late at night that had you feeling needy and in not a very good mood for the next day, it made you feel frustrated that you stayed always at the edge, but you were equally proud that you hadn’t broken his one rule.

The day he called you and told you with a happy voice that his last concert was in 3 more nights and that in two days after that you would be able to see him, you exploded. When you went to work you got asked multiple times what had happened that you couldn't stop smiling, making you laugh and lie to them that you were just excited for something that happened to one of your cousins or something like that.

It was a more contrastive mood than how you behaved last week, bags under your eyes, eyes semi closed from how tired you were and not so happy because your beautiful boyfriend required a session of self love where he got to edge you multiple times. Twice, to be more precise, the sudden change surprised everyone at your workplace. You seemed more energetic and focused, you did all your work with a smile on your face and you sang during your break when you ate.

You asked your boss if you could leave earlier one day, and seeing how competent you were behaving he accepted, wishing you good luck and telling you that he expected you to stay working as efficiently as possible and that he was happy with your work pace. You simply nodded, not hearing much of his speech because everything that was in your mind was your beautiful boyfriend.

Days passed quickly and you found yourself showering at 4 am to be able to go and receive your boyfriend and the rest of your friends in time. You would be done getting ready at 5, then had to get a taxi to the airport and then you would be able to spend the day with all of them, just like you wanted.

The early morning was cold, and you were thankful that you decided to wear an appropriate coat to protect yourself from the weather. You placed your hands together out of nervousness, anticipating the moment that all of them would arrive, walking through their fans and following the staff to where their vans were parked.

True… you couldn't run to Minho and wrap your arms around him. You had to keep the black mask above your nose and the dark glasses to avoid raising suspicion and pretend to be another staff member. Your relationship was a secret…

Sighing, a plane finally landed and the giant bodyguards that you sometimes brought candies to started walking towards it, you running not too far from them and breathing in to try and control your excitement, failing momentarily when you saw a group of men walk out followed by some other people close behind them. You recognized each one of your friends as soon as they walked out, they wore comfortable clothes and they seemed to be needing some more rest.

The real staff instructed them to go to the previously prepared cars, and you rushed to find your dance machine boyfriend.

You waited for Changbin, Jisung and Seungmin to get inside the car, Minho noticed you and he got in, waiting for you to close the door after you hopped in to hug you and pull you close to him in a loving manner. In the front seats, there was one of the bodyguards and the designated driver. You snuggled closer to Minho, he whispered "I missed you a lot" for you to hear only and he kissed your forehead gently, making you feel incredibly happy.

Not even 10 minutes inside the car, and soft snores could be heard, Minho's weight felt heavy in your side, but you didn't care, you were happy knowing that from that day he would get to rest for a long period of time, and you expected to spend a lot of time with him.

The stillness of the car made you open your eyes, rubbing them to get accustomed to the sun rays filters through the clear front window and you realized that you had finally arrived at the dorms. The bodyguard opened the door for you, giving you his hand to help you out. You shook Minho gently to help him wake up, yawning when he looked at you with disoriented eyes, and then you took the waiting hand to wait for them outside.

When all of them were outside the car, you helped them walk to their corresponding dorm, helping Minho walk with closed eyes because he wasn't fully awake, and when you finally got to your destination, the door was unlocked and there was a mountain of baggage and bags ready to unpack, but that would be a problem for later. In the kitchen, sitting with his laptop in front of him was Chan, he gave a low "good mornin" when he saw who had arrived, continuing to do whatever it was that he had on display in the screen in front of him. You nodded, silently greeting him and then walked to Minho's shared room. He plopped down on his bed, moving and patting the side next to him for you to lay down next to him, and you did.

"I missed you" you whispered, burying your face in his chest and hugging him tightly, making him chuckle quietly.

"I missed you too, hot stuff" he whispered back, looking down at you and patting your back gently.

The two of you stayed like that, there was no need to speak any more words, you were finally holding him, you were finally in his arms and you felt so loved. This was your safe place.

With those thoughts in your head, you dozed off again, your breathing almost syncing with Minho's steady one.

You had a beautiful dream with him, it started with you sitting on the porch of your childhood home observing the street until a younger looking Minho appeared and took your hand. He guided you to the insides of the place that used to be your home. He kissed you playfully at first, then he took your face with his hand and held you in place as the heat of the kiss increased and moments later he was eating you out in the kitchen aisle.

You were enjoying the dream probably a little too much, because you were woken up suddenly by your boyfriend's hands on your shoulder, moving you gently to bring you back to the real world.

"Seems like you had an interesting dream, didn't you?" he said. You blushed, hitting him gently on his chest and groaning.

"Maybe I wouldn't dream such things if someone," you shoot him a glare "didn't get me all worked up and then didn't allow me to cum" you complained, making him laugh. You were daring him, and you knew that, but you needed to know how much he would wait until he finally gave you what you wanted and fucked you hard like he'd done before he left.

"Oh, really, baby? It's my fault, then?" he asked. You pouted and nodded, looking at him with needy eyes. "Then I must do something to reward you for being so good, right?" his hand snaked on your tummy, getting to the edge of your shirt and going under it until it reached your breast.

His hand squeezed you, gaining a sigh from you. Two of his fingers played with your nub moment later, he shifted so he would be on his side and able to play with you, his lips finding a home in your neck and kissing you lazily, the caress of his lips against your skin and the sensation of him teasing your nipoles felt amazing, it was enough for you to start getting wet and your breathing to turn irregular, but all that ended when Jisung shamelessly opened the door.

"Hey guys, who's awake already? Does anyone wanna watch a movie?" he asked no one in particular, Minho's movement stopped and his arm quickly moved to wrap around your waist, his head fell against his pillow and you closed your eyes again to pretend to still be asleep. It was almost as if nothing between the two of you had happened, which would actually seem like it were true if both your hearts weren't racing from almost being caught.

You heard movement from the other side of the room, you recognized Hyunjin's steps passing through the door accompanied with a humm and later Seungmin's voice was heard, answering Jisung who was still standing by the entrance.

"I'm kinda hungry. I'll join if we order something to eat" he said, the sound of feet against the floor letting you know he was ready to leave the room.

"Sure, let's try to convince Chan to pay," Jisung responded, waiting for Seungmin to walk with him to the living room, but when Seungmin reached him, Jisung didn't move. "Shouldn't we wake Minho and ask him if he wants something as well?"

"Nah, he stayed up the whole flight I think, and besides, he's with Y/N. Let's order something for them and let them sleep," Seungmin said, his tired voice making it clear that he didn't want to deal with trying to wake Minho up.

The answer seemed to be enough for Jisung, and the two of them left, closing the door behind them. Just then, you allowed yourself to sigh in relief.

Next to you, Minho rolled on his side, his back now at you making you confused. "What are you doing?" you asked.

"You heard them, they think we're asleep, so we might go back to sleep again, don't you think?" he responded, his tone still low. You whined, hugging his whole body as best as you could, your mouth reaching his ear to whisper to him:

"But I'm so wet… are you really going back to sleep and leave me like this?" you cried to him, you knew he could feel you putting on the tone of voice you decided to use, but he didn't say anything, so you tried your luck again.

"Please, if you're not going to fuck me at least finger me, I've missed you so much… I've been waiting for you to use me for so long" you continued, begging with a low voice and pressing your lips against the shell of his ear, starting a trail of kisses down all the uncovered skin you could see, high diving yourself in your mind when you felt him shiver under your touch.

Minho finally sighed, giving in and turning so now he would be facing you, your eyes almost shone when his right hand went to your hip and his face got closer to yours to steal a passionate kiss that you now would end up making you feel like the world was spinning.

You couldn't help the giggle that escaped your lips when both of you tried to recuperate your normal breathing, drawing a raised eyebrow from your boyfriend. You simply took his face with both of your hands and started kissing him again, suddenly one of your hands leaving his cheek to guide the hand resting on your hip to where you needed him most. If he noticed, he had been nice enough to not say anything.

Or that's what you thought, because then he broke the kiss and growled quietly, his fingers playing with the button of your jeans until he was able to open them and he wasted no more time, his slender digit slipping past your underwear and feeling all the wetness between your legs.

"Oh, Y/N, you're so fucking wet, kitten" he muttered. His hand moved away from where you wanted it to be, making you complain and furrow your eyebrows while he showed you his glistening finger before guiding it to your lips for you to lick it clean yourself. Minho rolled his eyes when you grabbed his hand and made it touch you again, you didn't care how needy you seemed, everything you could think of was how much you'd love for him to rail you.

His fingers started working on you, slowly caressing your clit and gathering your essence before he entered you, making you sigh. He was staring at you, silently admiring your features that showed just how good he was making you feel. You weren't looking at him, your eyes closed as you tried to focus on the way he was making you feel, but you didn't need to see him to know how much he was grinning, proud to have you biting your lip to not moan too loud. At some point your breathing got heavier and your legs started to tremble, the last signal meaning that you were close was when your walls embraced his fingers, your mouth opened as you found home in the ecstasy-like sensation, Minho tried to prolong it by over stimulating you.

After a moment, he finally removed his fingers from your inside and licked it clean from your juices while you recovered.

"Was that better?" he asked, gaining a humming from you as an answer.

"It was good, but I still want you to fuck me" you finally said, pouting. He opened his eyes wide, as if he was actually surprised, and said:

"You're so greedy, my needy baby wants something else besides my fingers, huh? Go clean yourself and let's go to your house then. I'll give you the best welcome back fuck of your life" he kissed your forehead, waiting for you to stand up after you heard what he said.

"Really?" you asked, full of hope. He nodded, and you almost jumped from the bed to run to the bathroom, standing in front of the door fixing your jeans before walking out the room, remembering that you weren't alone.

You made your way silently to the bathroom, saving your hand at Jeongin who apparently had gone to his room for something and happened to find you on his journey to go back to the living room. He seemed tired, as if he hadn't fully tested, but his memory worked just fine because before you entered the bathroom he told you that they were going to watch a movie and had called for some takeout food for everyone. You thanked him and got inside to do what you had to do.

An hour later, you found yourself cuddling Mingo on the only individual couch after eating and watching a comedy with the rest of the members. Some were on their phone, some still eating and others were cuddling just like you were. It was a relaxed night, and you were having a good time, but the words Minho had told you earlier resonated in your head and your pussy was louder than your heart, screaming at you to act out and make Minho take you home to complete his promise.

Covered with a blanket, your hand snaked down his form and entered his joggers, feeling up his cock. You weren't looking at him to know his reaction, but he quickly squeezed you as a warning to not continue your devilish plans.

You didn't care, continuing to tease him until he got hard enough and that's when you pressed yourself against him. He sighed, but pushed himself against you almost as if encouraging you to keep going.

"Stop, Y/N. We'll leave after the movie is over" he whispered, trying to get you to reason with him.

The answer he got was you pulling his joggers and boxers down with one hand carefully, freeing his hardened cock from its prison and wrapping your hand around him, making him hiss. One of his hands went to your neck, pulling your head back to tell you one last thing.

“Kitten, if you’re going to act like a little brat then I’m going to treat you like a little brat when we get to your house" he murmured, quiet enough for you to listen to his words only.

If you were going to be punished, you might as well continue what you started.

Minho's hold on you tightened when he realized that you had set your mind on torturing him, you knew the risk of possibly getting caught was high and that it made everything way more exciting, but all your tries at being subtle and not drag any attention to the both of you were affecting him horribly. He hated how you ceased all movement when someone shifted or how you tensed when everyone stopped talking was like pure hell for Minho.

His cock twitched, and he faked a yawn to hide the noise that came out of him. You took advantage of it, and played along with it.

"Oh, you're still tired? We should go back to your room so you can sleep, don't you think?" you whispered, long enough for the rest of the members to hear.

Minho caught up with what you were doing, faking another yawn and hugging your body as if you were a plushie. He nodded, and you fixed his clothes quickly so the two of you could stand up.

Minho had other plans, and stood up with you in his arms, the blanket covering his boner. Everyone's eyes were on you two, so you said goodnight and entered the shared room again. Once inside, he didn't even turn the light on, walking straight to the bed after closing the door and dropping you there.

"I can't believe you're making me break Chan's 'no fucking in the dorms' rule" he said, taking his shirt off. You laughed, starting to undress as well.

"As if you really cared about rules" you said, opening your arms for him when you and him were finally fully naked.

"You're right, I only care about you and fucking you. You'll get your punishment later" he replied, hovering over you and positioning his member at your entrance, pressing your foreheads together as he slowly entered you. He kissed you before he started slamming into you, trying to maintain your moans to a minimum so the whole 'going to sleep' act could still be believable to your friends.

With your arms thrown around his neck and your legs hugging his waist, you felt the happiest, like you were in heaven. Finally, Minho was filling you with his cock, making you feel like he was the missing piece in your life that left a hole in your constant day to day with his sole absence, but now he was back, fucking you, kissing you; loving you, and it made your head and your heart swim with happiness, because he was back and you would have him like before he left.

He was thrusting you carefully, slowly but not too much to make you feel bored or annoy you, it was almost the right speed to make the moment last longer, a try to be more passionate with you. Minho's grunts and your heavy breathing were all you cared about, you forgot about everything outside the door, but the way your reasonable side made you moan quietly still brought a sense of reality to you, you whimpered and opened your mouth to exhale, his own breathing on your face making you open your eyes to look at him while he kept working, rocking his hips against yours and trying to make you cum for the second time of the day.

"I love you" you told him quietly, looking up at his sweaty face and pulling him in by his neck to kiss him lovingly like you meant to do when you saw him coming out of the plane.

Minho smiled against your lips, allowing his weight to fall on you and support himself on his left elbow, using his right hand to caress your cheek and move a strand of your hair that had gotten on your face so he could admire you better. When he finished the kiss, you thought he would return to the old position, supporting himself with both arms, but he didn't and instead he started kissing your whole face, making you giggle and close your eyes, with each kiss he left on your face you could say he tried to speed up to finally make you reach your well deserved orgasm, everything in that moment felt so intimate, and the addition of the kisses on your face and him gently cupping your cheek let you know this wasn't simple fucking anymore.

You would make a disgusted face at how cheesy it sounded, but in that very moment you couldn't describe the intimate activity as anything else than love making.

It wouldn't be the first time that Minho treats you as gentle as this, but something… felt different. You couldn't quite tell what it was, maybe because it had been months since you were with him, or because you missed him so much, but the ambient felt more mature in the aspect that you knew that his sweet whispers praising you and reminding you that he loved you as well and that you meant so much to him were not just words.

You wanted to cry, but you knew this wasn't the moment, your quiet moans mixed with giggles and adoring smiles disappeared when the new hard thrusting made your walls tighten around Minho's cock, and without any advice you came. You knew that there was a high percentage that the boys already knew what the two of you were up to thanks to the cracking of the bed and the specific noise of skin slapping sounds, but you still wanted to try and drown your moans to simulate that you were sleeping.

"Ah, baby…" Minho grunted, his face hiding in the crook of your neck to then whisper to you "I'm gonna cum…" followed by the twitching of his cock inside you.

"C-cum inside me, fill me up" you said back, your broken voice and tucked out features when he moved to see you being all he needed to release his seed inside you.

The warm sensation of his semen flowing in you made you smile, and your panting boyfriend pulled out of you to take the tissues box he hid under his bed for all occasions.

You looked at him when he kneeled in front of you to clean you, knowing how tired he actually was by the way his eyes were closing, and you appreciated how he still worried to clean you and not let you all sticky, very sweet of him.

The two of you dressed up lazily, this time laying in bed to sleep like you had said that you would do some time ago.

"I'm so happy you're back, I really missed you" you whispered, your hand resting flat on his chest as you listened to his heart beating under you.

"I'm glad to be back as well, kitten. I thought I would go crazy if I spent more days without seeing you" he joked, patting your head with his hand.

"Let's not think about it now, I had a hard time without cumming when you weren't here" he laughed at your words responding by squeezing you a bit.

"Well, if you're going to be this needy every time I come back, I don't mind leaving you as much" he said back, tone so serious that it scared you.

"You're not being serious, right?" you moved, looking at his face. He had his eyes closed, but the faint shadow of a smile creeping on his lips. He opened them to look at you before he answered you.

"Of course not, kitten. The last thing I want is to be away from you, it's so hard to be far from you when I love you this much" he finally said, making you sigh in relief and your heart throb inside your chest.

"It's not my fault that you love me so much, you're only guilty for making me love you so bad" you smiled, going back to resting on his chest.

"Shhh, you know, that I'm the best that's happened in your life, but we can talk about how awesome I am later, now sleep. I promise I'll be here when you wake up" he moved, shifting to press a kiss on your forehead.

"I hope so, you promised me the fuck of my life when we go to my house and I can't wait for that" you laughed, poking his side.

"We'll see when tomorrow comes, but sleep first. Good night, baby, I love you."

[baya-ni]

SHADOW’s Queer Coding

I first started exploring this idea of Sk8′s implicit queer rep (as in stuff other than explicit same sex intimacy) in this post.

I know we like to joke that Hiromi is the Token Straight of the protag gang, but I argue that he’s as much an example of queer rep as any of our main characters, albeit in a less conventional and fanservicey way.

So that’s what this post is gonna be, an analysis of Hiromi/SHADOW as a queer figure, how his character fits the Jekyll/Hyde archetype as a metaphor for queerness and The Closet, the similarities between SHADOW as a skatesona and early drag, and how his character represents a larger problem of exclusion within queer fandom spaces.

The 1886 Gothic novella The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson is the origin of the phrase “Jekyll and Hyde”. What I’m calling the Jekyll/Hyde archetype, refers to the same thing; it refers to duality, to a character who is “outwardly good but sometimes shockingly evil” (as described from the novella’s wiki page).

And the Jekyll/Hyde dynamic has also long been associated with Queerness. The antagonism between Jekyll and Hyde as two sides of the same person resonates with many people as similar to the experience being in the closet, and many many scholars have written about this queer reading of Jekyll and Hyde. Do a quick google search if you don’t believe me.

Hiromi experiences his own Jekyll/Hyde duality through his SHADOW persona, which seems to entirely contradict with Hiromi’s day to day personality.

Whilst Hiromi is sweet, romantic, and generally very cutesy, SHADOW is mean-spirited, sadistic, described as “the anti-hero of the S community.”  And though these two personalities seem entirely at odds, SHADOW doesn’t exist in a vacuum, he’s very much a part of Hiromi. In the show, this manifests as SHADOW’s sabotage moves being all flower themed, as Hiromi works in a flower shop, and how he’ll “step out” of character when playing babysitter to the kids.

Below is passage from an essay titled, “The Homoerotic Architectures of Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” which reminds me a lot of Hiromi’s character, such that I think his character arc can be read as an allegory for coming out and self acceptance.

The closet, here, is a space not only for secrecy and repression, but also for becoming; it is the space in which queer identities build themselves up from “disused pieces” and attempt to discover the strength needed for presentation to the world. The closet is both a space of profound fear and profound courage—of potentiality and actualization. (Prologue)

Unlike the kid/teen characters, the show’s adult characters all lead double lives. When they aren’t skating, they have day jobs. Kaoru is a calligrapher, Kojiro is a restaurant owner, Ainosuke is a politician/businessman (but tbh his job is just being some rich dude), and Hiromi works in a flower shop.

But of the adult protagonists (so not Ainosuke), Hiromi compartmentalizes the most.

Kojiro leaves his face totally exposed such that he can be recognized both on and off the skate scene. Kaoru at least covers his face, but his trademark pink hair and constant use of Carla doesn’t make it very hard to connect the dots between him and CHERRY. He’s also always with Kojiro in the evenings, so if you don’t recognize him as CHERRY when he’s on his own, you certainly will when you see him interacting with Kojiro/JOE.

Next to these two, Hiromi seems the more adamant at separating his Work from Play.

Even when he’s been clearly found it, he still tries to deny that he and SHADOW are the same person. Miya even uses this to coerce Hiromi into helping him and the boys:

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that the separation between Hiromi and SHADOW can be interpreted as a metaphor for being in The Closet. As SHADOW, he leads a secret life, one characterized by an tight-knit underground community with a vibrant night scene, where he behaves in ways typically frowned upon by larger society. He worries about being found out and judged by the people close to him.

But in Ep 4, the walls of his Closet begins to come down, or in this case is literally imposed upon by other members of his community, by its younger members, who don’t feel the same need to hide their passion for skateboarding or lead the same kind of double life.

We then see the line between Hiromi and SHADOW begin to blur.

He becomes less of an antagonist, and instead the audience sees him become a mentor and “mother hen” figure for the younger skaters. Later on in Ep 4, we see him casually interacting with the other protags in full SHADOW mode, not as an “anti-hero” but as a friend.  In Ep 6, he acts as a babysitter for the kids, and we see him totally comfortable appearing both in an out of his SHADOW persona throughout their vacation.

And I think that this gradual convergence of Hiromi and SHADOW will culminate in this tournament arc.

There’s something more personal that’s driving SHADOW to do well in this tournament. It’s not just for bragging rights or his pride as a skater, but the results of this tournament is going to have some kind of greater impact on Hiromi’s personal life. Personally, my theory is that Hiromi is using this tournament to prove to himself that he’s worthy enough to ask his manager out on a date.

Hiromi is no longer compartmentalizing, his two lives are overlapping and influencing each other. Recall the essay quote I cited earlier:

The closet... is the space in which queer identities build themselves up from “disused pieces” and attempt to discover the strength needed for presentation to the world... of potentiality and actualization.

This is exactly the case for Hiromi. Through skating, he is piecing together the disparate parts of him such that he can present himself to the world as a more unified and confident being.

And the show presents the very skating community that Hiromi has been working so hard to keep separated from his personal life- Reki, Langa, Miya, Kaoru, and Kojiro- as the catalyst for that becoming.

That, my dear readers, is queer coding if I ever saw it.

But there’s probably gonna be people claiming something along the lines of “But SHADOW can’t be queer rep because he’s Straight!” And I assume that’s because he shows romantic interest in his female manager.

First of all, Bisexuality. Also Ace/aro-spec people. And second of all, SHADOW is Hiromi’s drag persona.

And before anyone can say anything about how Hiromi can’t do drag because he’s straight (assumption) and cis (also an assumption) uhhhh no, fuck you.

Drag didn’t start with RuPaul’s Drag Race, that’s just how it got mainstream. And it’s also how it got so gentrified and transphobic. You heard me. But anyway.

Drag is, and has always been, first and foremost about exaggerated, and oftentimes satirical, gender presentation and performance. It’s about playing with gender norms through artistic dress and theater, not so much to do with sexuality or gender identity.

Literally, what’s the difference here?

SHADOW is a persona of exaggerated masculinity with a punk aesthetic. Regardless of his sexuality or gender identity, Hiromi’s gender performance as SHADOW is drag- that makes him queer representation, change my fucking mind.

Queerness is more than same-sex romance, and by extension, good queer representation is not limited to canonized gay ships. The very word Queer, in it’s ambiguity, is meant to encompass the richly unique experiences of everyone within the LGBTQ+ community.

In my opinion, Queer =/= Gay. I mean, they’re colloquially the same yes and even I use them interchangeably. But for the purpose of this post, they’re not the same, and that’s to argue that Hiromi/SHADOW’s lack of acknowledgement as queer rep illustrates a larger issue of exclusion within fandom.

I mean, this is something we all kinda been knew, but in the case of Sk8 specifically, there are a two main reasons why I think Hiromi is rarely acknowledged as queer rep.

1. He’s not shippable with another male character

Fandom favors mlm ships when it comes to what’s considered good queer rep. And the ultimate mark of good queer rep is explicit acts of romance or intimacy between two male characters. Unlike with any of the other characters in the show, we can’t point to Hiromi and automatically clock him as gay, especially because he expresses romantic interest in a woman.

So by default, he’s less popular, because “Ew Straight People” amirite /s.

2. He’s not attractive

This is really interesting, because like JOE, Hiromi is a beefcake.

But fans don’t thirst over him the same way they do over JOE. Granted, the show really plays up JOE’s muscles in a very strip-teasey way that literally encourages viewers to find him attractive. By contrast, Hiromi is pretty much covered head to toe and he paints his face in theatrical makeup- the point is to look scary, not attractive.

In essence, even though Hiromi engages in “queer behavior” through his SHADOW persona, his queerness isn’t palatable.

But I also think there’s some pretty insidious undercurrents of fetishization going on here, of both Asian people AND gay men. Which is... a whole other thing I really don’t have the capacity to unpack completely.

But basically, Hiromi doesn’t fit into any of the popular BL archetypes so he’s less likely to recognized as Queer. Relatedly, he’s also less often subjected to a fetishistic gaze as other characters. I mean...

So again, fans just don’t find him as appealing. Attractive characters are always more popular than ugly ones.

And I’m sure there are a lot of people who just don’t care for Hiromi’s personality, that’s fine, he does act like an asshole sometimes. But this post is meant to illustrate that queer rep takes multiple forms, and unfortunately I think a lot of media just tends to fall back on stereotypical portrayals of queer people for the sake of broader appeal. And by consequence, the fandom’s idea of what constitutes queer rep narrows to same-sex romance, usually between two cis gay men.

With the release of Ep 9, I know a lot of people queer people are going to find representation in the Kojiro’s whole “unrequited love” thing. But personally, I feel more represented by Hiromi, his journey of self-acceptance and subversive relationship with gender- that’s what resonates with me as a trans person.

And I think it’s important to see that kind of less palatable type of queer representation more acknowledged in fandom, and in Sk8′s fandom especially, because I know the demographics of this fandom lean heavily queer.

But that’s all for now, lemme know what you guys think :)

[firelxdykatara]

Katara hated Zuko. It was a plot point. Sokka never did--and their "friendship" in the show was close to becoming something more--so they were on equal footing and had hinted romance. Zutara is misogynistic--why are you forcing Katara into a relationship with someone she hates? Choose Toph or Suki if you really believe Zuko isn't gay.

there’s so much to unpack here, and i know i should really throw out the whole suitcase, but i just can’t help myself

and please, i beg of you, picture someone laughing so hard that tears are streaming down their face because that’s me right now, reading this ask. i about choked on my eggnog, so thanks for that!

point the first: sokka hated zuko every bit as much as katara did in the first two books. it was a plot point. sokka wanted to leave zuko to die because saving him wouldn’t have been worth the trouble--he was pragmatic and deeply distrustful of anyone who wasn’t in his immediate circle, and that went especially hard for anyone from the fire nation. including the birds!

point the first part two: sokka’s easy acceptance of zuko into the gaang had less to do with any budding friendship or caring for him (since there was none to speak of until the boiling rock episodes), and more to do with a lack of any personal grudge. aka: there was no tension there. nothing to really dig into--no true development of feelings. because aang needed a firebending teacher, zuko was around and willing to take on that role, and also he was a prime roasting target, so sokka was happy enough to let bygones be after he helped them take down combustion man.

which, of course, isn’t to say shipping them isn’t valid. there are plenty of ships that have little to no canon basis but a lot of fandom support, and that’s usually fine....until the fans start getting uppity about it and insisting that there Is Canon Basis Really, and then insisting that the ‘rival’ ship is misogynistic when their alleged ‘canon basis’ requires stripping everything meaningful from the girl’s relationship to the boy and giving it to her brother instead. which is exactly what you’re doing here, but i digress.

point the second: how on earth was sokka and zuko’s ‘friendship’ in the show (and why the scare quotes? were they not actually friends? are you really sitting in my inbox right now devaluing their platonic relationship because you don’t think it exists outside of your belief that they really wanted to fuck the whole time, despite sokka being in a happy relationship with someone else?) ‘close to becoming something more’? when did they ever have a single, solitary conversation that hinted at any ��deeper’ feelings? sokka spent most of their buddy cop adventure to boiling rock mooning over his girlfriend (heh, get it? mooning? because he- oh, you get the point), to the point where he had literal hearteyes the instant he saw her--and zuko’s purpose there wasn’t to deepen his relationship with sokka so much as it was to reunite sokka and katara with their father, and to see an example of what a healthy paternal relationship actually looks like.

(one of my favorite shots in the show is zuko’s soft smile when sokka and katara are hugging hakoda)

so already your claim that they ‘had hinted romance’ falls incredibly flat, because there was absolutely nothing in the show that was ‘hinting’ they had romantic feelings for one another--in universe or out of it. sokka was happily in love with suki, and even the one scene that i can imagine might make shippers scream--when zuko popped into sokka’s tent late at night--sokka was about to have sex with his girlfriend, and when he asked zuko ‘what’s on your mind’, the first words out of his mouth were your sister.

(and then, as soon as zuko left, sokka was calling for suki again. the next morning, he was making a flower necklace--or a lei. because he got lei’d. it’s amazing the things you pick up when you rewatch the show as an adult lmfao.)

point the third (and this one is really where your argument blows up in your face): your insistence that zutara requires ‘forcing katara into a relationship with someone she hates’ reveals your own ignorance, because it’s demonstrably not true--unless you’re trying to argue that katara hated zuko all the way through to the end of the show, which??? i suppose makes it make more sense that you think zuko and sokka had a hinted romance in the text, because viewing comprehension clearly isn’t your strongsuit.

why are yall so quick to dismiss katara’s own feelings in the name of calling a fictional, noncanon ship ‘misogynistic’? because katara said, in the text, ‘but I am ready to forgive you’--and then she hugged zuko, called him into a group hug with the gaang later, joked (and even flirted) with him on ember island, helped talk him through his anxiety about facing his uncle, and happily agreed to go with him to face his sister, where she saved his life after watching him take a literal bolt of lightning to save hers.

if any of that had happened with sokka, yall would be calling it demonstrable evidence that zuko and sokka are in love. and yet when we use that canonical buildup and the deep bond of friendship and trust zuko and katara have by the end of the series to imagine them getting into a romantic relationship because of feelings developed during these events......you call us misogynistic? really? because we’re ‘forcing’ her into a relationship with someone she ‘hates’....except she didn’t hate him by the end of the series, they were very close friends and had gotten over and had closure from their personal baggage, and that’s the kind of stuff that provides excellent fuel for envisioning a romantic relationship developing!

so what was your argument again?

ETA: i was so busy deconstructing the bulk of your argument that i forgot to address that laughable last line--toph or suki? who had much, MUCH less relationship development with zuko than katara did?? ‘if you really believe zuko isn’t gay’???? im sorry that you can’t recognize a whole bisexual when you see one, but as a bi myself, i know that zuko’s dual-wielding ass couldn’t ‘pick a side’ if his life depended on it. and he had more romantic coding with both jet and katara than he ever had with sokka--that’s just a fact. sorry if the truth hurts, anon!

[writing-gifts]

both sides of the viewfinder chp. 4

adult film star!bruno x afab!reader  (they are also gn)

18+ content!!

chapter 1 || chapter 2 || chapter 3 || chapter 4

——–

A/N: i was not quicker with the next update lol, but im tired of reading over it so gonna just throw it out there now since im mostly happy with it!

anyways, resort time babeyyy 😎

------

You try not to show it but you're filled with excitement. You've never been to a resort and Bruno had offered to pay for your expenses. Of course you were only willing to let him pay half (which was the lowest you could get him to go).

The two of you had been playing a game of sorts ever since your little session in the dressing room. Even though the both of you wanted to finish what you started, you had wordlessly decided to see how long the other would last before giving in. You couldn't really call it romantic but you did know there was lust involved--a lot.

The game had honestly made you quite bold and taught you some patience. Of course you still had some close calls though, and filming Bruno at work had made it that much harder for you. It wasn't fair and you made sure to let the man know this, but he just coyly smiled and told you he was ready to go whenever you were.

You drop your luggage in front of the bed you and Bruno would be sharing for the next week. At first, you assumed you would both be in separate rooms since you weren't an actual item, but Bruno wasn't having any of it which you were glad for. You wanted to get as much alone time as you could with him during this vacation.

You get closer to the sliding glass doors that lead to the balcony. The location was perfect and you had a nice view of the beach from here. You had never seen such blue water or white sand. And you could already feel yourself sprawled out on a towel next to a shirtless Bruno.

"Like the view?" Bruno asks, pulling you from your thoughts.

You nod. "This is great! Thank you again for inviting me."

"Of course. I didn't want to go a whole week without seeing you."

You try to force down the smile that appears on your face in response but it's obvious and you know Bruno already saw it.

He smiles, reaches out and places a gentle hand on your cheek. However, you close your eyes to avoid his very intense and persuading gaze.

"Gonna have to try harder than that," you say under breath as you turn back to the balcony.

"...I didn't expect you to last this long. You've definitely proved me wrong."

"And I'm going to win too." You stick out your tongue.

Bruno smirks but says nothing more before going to unpack his luggage. You eventually pull yourself away from the view to do the same.

-----

You lay on your back, sunglasses on your face as you let the sun warm you. You were still pretty full from brunch and any moment now you expected to fall asleep. 'Til then, you watch Irene, Eli and Jocelyn goofing off in the water and sand.

The group decided to start the day together off at the beach. Which was perfect because today was going to be about relaxation, at least for you anyways. You all had time to get rowdy later if you wanted to anyways.

"____?"

You turn your head to look at Bruno who currently lays on his front. His sun hat sits on the back of his head to keep that part of him shaded.

"If you don't mind, can you put sunscreen on me? It's been awhile since I last did."

"Sure," you say. You should probably put some on too when you're done.

You walk on your knees to grab the bottle out of Bruno's bag and then crawl your way over to him.

You couldn't help but take a moment to admire his tanned back. The muscles along it were a lovely sight and of course being the horny bastard that you are, your eyes drift down towards his ass. He had a cute butt that you had seen many times but still weren't tired of.

You suddenly remember a scene where Bruno was getting railed and need to take a moment to calm down.

Maybe one day…

"Hello?" Bruno pulls you from your inappropriate imaginings.

"Right, right--sunscreen."

You scooch up next to him and move to place your knees on either side of his hips so you can sit on his upper thighs.

Bruno looks over his shoulder at you with a raised brow, causing his hat to fall off, but you smile innocently.

"Relax," you say.

He squints but lays his head back on his arms.

Once you squeeze and rub the cool, sweet smelling cream on your hands you bring them to his shoulders. You spread the cream following the lines of his muscles on his upper back before sliding lower.

You spend a little more time on his lower back then you should, and the dimples that rest above his ass get special attention.

The man's hips shift oh so slightly and you look up and see that his eye is closed and his brow furrowed.

You scoot up and lean forward. "I could do your front too," you whisper in his ear.

"We are in public."

You jolt at the gruff voice a small distance away. Sitting up, you see Abbacchio scowling at the two of you from the giant parasol he's sitting under.

You sigh but move off Bruno before the goth kills you with his glare.

"You're right. Sorry," Bruno says.

You weren't sorry but nod anyways. It's not like you two were doing anything that obvious. Just some teasing. And there was barely anyone outside your friend group out here!

"Just keep it out of my sight." Abbacchio taps the airpods in his ear before returning his attention to the ocean.

After you all get your fill of the beach, which goes well into the evening, it's time to get ready for dinner.

Since it was the first official day of your vacation you all want something more casual but still on the expensive side. So you all eventually decide on Korean BBQ.

"I'm just glad you two didn't try to fuck each other on the beach," Irene says. "Even if it would have been fun to watch…"

Okay so maybe you weren't as discrete as you thought. Abbacchio throws an unimpressed look directly at you and Bruno, but you choose to ignore it.

"I was just putting sunscreen on him I swear…"

Eli smirks at you. "This picture says otherwise."

Your brows raise when they show you and Bruno the image on their phone.

Your cheeks go hot and you look down at your plate. "Why did you even take a picture of that?"

"Memories!"

Jocelyn barks out a laugh. "You have a weird taste in memories cause that's the last thing I'd want to remember!"

You roll your eyes but you know it was in good fun. Bruno seems mildly amused anyways.

Not willing to entertain the topic any further, you pick up a piece of grilled pork from your plate. As you bring it to your mouth, you feel Bruno's leg brush against yours.

You peak over at him but he seems to be completely invested in a conversation with Abbacchio.

You assume it's an accident until you feel him do it again along with resting his hand on your upper leg. His fingers gently squeeze your inner thigh before rubbing the area with his thumb.

You continue eating your food as if it has no affect on you. It takes a lot of will power though as he continues his caresses throughout the whole dinner.

Afterwards, the group splits off. Jocelyn and Irene head to a club, Eli to the casino (Jocelyn made sure to put a limit on the money they could blow) and Abbacchio to the bar. You and Bruno decide to head to your room, obviously not in the mood to go anywhere else tonight.

When you reach your room, you both get ready for bed acting as if you don't want to fuck each other.

You crawl next to Bruno on the bed once you're done with the bathroom.

"I'm not tired yet…" you say

"Me neither."

"I guess we could watch a movie or show. There has to be something we both like on Netflix."

You pick up the remote for the TV and make your way to Netflix and start scrolling through the options on the front page.

"What type of stuff do you like to watch anyways?" you ask.

"Romance works."

"You probably watch the explicit type of romance," you joke.

Bruno's eyes widen slightly and you surmise that you guessed right. Either that or he was weirded out by your statement and that seemed very unlikely.

You smile amused. "Well I guess we could watch something like that then!"

Once you both finally settle on something, you get comfortable and lean against Bruno.

The movie wasn't really that great and every sex scene that happened made you cringe but it was at least kind of entertaining. Still, you were starting to get bored and were still horny from all the nonsense you and Bruno had been up to the last several days.

So in a moment of weakness you place your hand on Bruno's thigh. He looks at you expectantly but you do nothing more.

You want to look at him properly to see his expression but you need 100% focus or you would break. So you keep your eyes on the TV as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. If you were lucky this would somehow bring your game to a close and the two of you could do something more exciting.

Bruno says your name under his breath, but you simply hum. Enduring that dinner was proof of your will and you believe you could keep this up all night if needed. (But that was the last thing you were hoping for.)

Suddenly, you feel a warm hand on top of yours.

Bruno guides your hand further up his thigh. "Please…"

"Huh?" You fake the confusion in your voice.

"Let's end this game."

"Oh...so that means I win?"

"Yes you win, just please touch me."

You smirk and move to kneel a small distance in front of him. "That was so easy!" You were thoroughly going to enjoy this.

When he sees you're not getting closer it prompts him to scooch forward on the bed, but before he can touch you, you push him down on his back and crawl on top. There's a slightly stunned look on his face but it quickly changes to one of anticipation.

You line your chest with Bruno's and lean down for a kiss which he returns enthusiastically.

"I never thought I'd enjoy losing this much...." he murmurs against your lips.

You smirk and continue your kisses down his cheek. Your hands find their way under his shirt and slowly explore the span of his abdomen and chest. He softly sighs when you begin sucking at the skin between his neck and shoulder and your hands squeeze him in response.

When you hear Bruno's breathing become slightly heavier you sit up and remove his shirt. You'd seen his body many times in all sorts of positions but you still take a second to appreciate his toned torso.

You press kisses to his chest and let your hands run down his sides enjoying how he just barely reacts under your fingertips. You stop at his hips, and your thumbs trace back and forth along his hip bones. Your tongue brushes against Bruno's nipple, and you feel him tense under your hands.

You move back to sit on his pelvis and immediately feel his cock through his pants. Bruno gently rocks his hips against your ass, and you entertain the motion by pressing down yourself.

His hands grab your hips, but before he can get too carried away you pull your ass off him. He ends up humping the air and lets out a sigh of frustration. His tune changes quickly though when he sees you move down between his legs.

"I'm not really feeling like I lost anything…"

You gently rub at his hard bulge through his pajama pants. "Well guess I'm just that generous. But at the same time I feel like I'm going too easy on you now."

"Please don't make me wait any longer ____."

You look up and the man's cheeks are flushed and he seems a little dazed, but he doesn't take his eyes off you. Seeing the usually controlled actor look at you this way has your stomach flipping.

"I didn't expect you to be so impatient," you say.

"I suppose you just have this effect on me..."

Smiling to yourself, you pull his pants down and are surprised by a pair of fancy panties.

You raise a brow at him. "...You already knew how tonight was going to end, huh?"

You carefully pull the satin fabric down before licking a slow stripe up his cock. The smug look on Bruno's face is immediately wiped away.

You wrap your hand around his twitching member and press your lips against the tip. He lets out a low hum, and your tongue licks against the slit before your mouth wraps around his sensitive head.

Whenever Bruno tries to move his hips you force them down and continue with your teasing touches along his cock. But eventually you decide to stop messing with him and fully take him into your mouth.

His eyes flutter shut. "Hmm, that feels amazing amore."

Even though he was finally in your mouth you move achingly slow and you can tell he wants you to go faster. And he makes it quite clear.

You let up a bit but mostly keep at driving him crazy. Your hand starts to knead at his balls and you immediately feel him twitching in your mouth.

"____. You're--"

You pull off.

Once Bruno realizes what just happened he deadpans at you. You laugh at his expression and he sits up with a sigh.

"Okay you had your fun, time to lay back."

You raise a brow at him.

Bruno begins stripping himself completely of his clothes. "You're the winner, right? Let me treat you."

Perhaps he had a point, and you didn't really have a problem with letting him takeover. This time.

Before you can think of taking your own clothes off, Bruno's doing it for you. His thumbs hook in the band of your pants and pull them down for you.

"...No underwear?" he asks.

You shrug and remove your shirt in an attempt to prevent yourself from laughing. "Guess you weren't the only one planning on ending this tonight."

Once you're done, you lay down and Bruno settles next to you. He places his hand on your lower stomach and brings his face close to yours. You immediately get caught in his blue eyes. It's not fair that he gets to be so handsome.

His finger easily pushes past your wet entrance while his thumb rubs gentle circles against your clit. Another finger is soon added and he begins to thrust his fingers slowly into you. When he crooks them against your walls you have a hard time holding back the noises you want to make.

"A-Are you gonna get me back for teasing you?" you ask. It would be deserved, but you hope he didn't. You hadn't realized how worked up you were until Bruno started touching you.

"Another time. I don't want to wait any longer."

He removes his fingers and gets himself situated on top of you. Once his hips are comfortably between your legs, you drag a finger along his cock before grabbing and lining it with your entrance. Finally after all the games you could both get some relief.

The moment Bruno feels himself against your entrance he presses in letting you take him slowly, inch by inch. When he's fully in, you sigh and slightly wiggle your hips. One of your legs hook around his waist and you place your arms around his neck. He keeps his eyes on yours as he pulls back before pressing in again and starting a nice and comfortable rhythm.

Your hand plays at the soft hairs at the nape of his neck before properly tangling into his locks. You pull and his lips part, a perfect moan falling from them. His hips thrust against you particularly hard forcing a groan out of you.

You smirk a bit. "Never get tired of that…"

Your fingers massage his scalp before you guide his face close to yours. Your lips join and he quickly presses his tongue into your mouth.

Just as you're really enjoying the kiss, he ends it. But before you can pout he pulls you close against him. His thrusts begin to speed up and his moans are muffled by the side of your face.

You always loved Bruno's moans when you were filming him but something about his current ones were different--so desperate and wanting. They had you clenching on his cock.

His hand snakes down between you two and your eyes fall shut as he rubs your clit. Your breath hitches when you feel him nip your ear.

Bruno hums. "You feel amazing...I feel like I could do this for hours."

You mumble something unintelligible under your breath in reply, not even sure what it you said until you start moaning out Bruno's name. Your back arches and your legs tighten around his waist to keep his hips in place as you come.

Bruno nuzzles against your neck and once your legs relax he continues thrusting.

"You came on my cock so well...ah, just a little more--"

His hips begin to stutter and he calls out your name. You press your lips to his temple and move your hips to help him along. His body tenses before he pulls out and comes onto your stomach.

Bruno's hips rock against you as he comes down and soon his body relaxes against yours. He doesn't seem to mind the mess he's making. His nose brushes against your cheek before you feel a kiss.

After some silence you yawn."...We should do this more often."

He stops peppering kisses on your neck and places an arm over your torso. "Agreed. In fact, we can start again in 5 minutes after I clean us off."

You gawk a bit at him. "Don't you get tired?"

"I do, that's why I said 5 minutes."

You scoff but end up grinning instead. "Well...it's not like we're going anywhere for awhile."

[the-modernmary]

my best habit || aaron hotchner x reader (ch. 5)

Chapter summary: Aaron and the rest of the BAU finally make an arrest on their case, and you spend the weekend at Aaron’s.

Warnings: SMUT, oral (f receiving), multiple orgasms

prev. chapter || masterlist || read on ao3

I had a few, got drunk on you, and now I’m wasted

And when I sleep I’m gonna dream of how you tasted

- Harry Styles, “Medicine”

 ~~~~~~~

The investigation was slow going, and every day when you got off the metro to get to your internship, you would see the undercover van that you knew had BAU members cramped inside, sitting and waiting for somebody, anybody , to slip up and say something incriminating. 

  It was weird being at work knowing that it was bugged, but it did wonders for your productivity. Whenever Chris or another one of your friends at the office started to ask you about your personal life, you were able to deflect it with a quick “Sorry, I’m in the zone right now, and I’ve really got to focus!” Usually, you had no problem sharing, but you really didn’t want the FBI to have audio evidence of your retelling of you double fisting vodka Sprites the night before until you passed out in your bathtub. 

  You also hadn’t seen Aaron since that first night together, which was almost a week ago now. The two of you had been texting back and forth pretty consistently, but you quickly found that there was a variable that wasn’t there two years ago - Jack.

You should have realized that, of course , Jack would be living with Aaron now, but it never crossed your mind. Jack used to live with Haley, and Aaron rarely brought him up to you. Now that Jack lived with Aaron, it made things a little more complicated. It also meant that you couldn’t just show up at Aaron’s doorstep whenever you were feeling lonely, or vice versa. After a long and awkward phone call, Aaron and you had both agreed that it was best that Jack just didn’t meet you, just in case he got attached.

  “For now, at least,” Aaron had added at the end, and holy shit, you did not have the time to unpack whatever the fuck that meant.

  Especially not with Chris throwing a crumpled piece of paper at you like the two of you were in middle school and passing notes.

  You held up the ball of paper with a raised eyebrow. “Seriously? You have the desk across from me, you could have just said my name.”

  “What are you doing tonight?” he asked you, pointedly ignoring your question. “Nina just got the Catan expansion pack and she wants us all to come over.”

  You pursed your lips as you thought about the offer. You did love game nights with your friends, but it was Friday night and you were still holding out on the possibility of Aaron maybe being free and inviting you over. It was almost pitiful how touch starved you were after just a few days of not being with Aaron.

  “I’m not sure whether or not I’m busy tonight,” you admitted, maybe speaking a little too loudly in the direction of the listening devices, just in case Aaron was listening in. 

  Chris gave you a knowing smirk. “Oh, are you waiting to hear from your secret lover?”

  “Okay, don’t use the word ‘lover’ again,” you groaned. “And what makes you think that it was anything more than a one night stand?”

  “Because when you’re not actively texting, you’ve been checking your phone every 20 minutes.”

  Your face turned red as you sunk into your seat, trying and failing to hide yourself. Maybe if you willed it hard enough, the ground would open up and swallow you whole, just to save you from the embarrassment. You hadn’t realized you were checking your phone so often, but you also didn’t doubt it. 

  “Fine,” you grumbled, deciding that coming clean to your friends was going to be much easier than having to deal with them bringing it up at every moment possible. Besides, you didn’t have to give them all the details. “I will tell everybody all about him, but later . Not now.”

  Chris smirked as he leaned back in his chair, obviously proud of himself. You turned back to your work, mindlessly doing edits as you came up with a cover story in your head.

  Ran into an old friend, you could say. We got drinks, and then one thing led to another. That could work, except you came to the realization that you didn’t have any photos of Aaron, which would be suspicious if he was an old friend. You would have to look him up, which you were sure would just lead to a slew of FBI ID photos and news articles, which would mean that they’d just do some major googling of their own. You had avoided looking up Aaron, maybe in fear of what fucked up cases he had been involved in, but your friends would not hesitate.

  You could come up with something so ridiculous that they would just laugh about it. Yeah, I got a sugar daddy and he made me sign a nondisclosure agreement, sorry! You giggled to yourself just thinking about it. Aaron would probably be mortified at the thought. Although, he did wear a Rolex, so you guessed that anything was possible.

  “Holy shit, Y/N,” Chris mumbled, and you just gave a lazy hum as a reply, not really paying attention. “The FBI is here.”

  Your head snapped up at that . You whipped your head around so that you could face the entrance, and sure enough, the entire BAU team was walking in like they owned the place, with Aaron in the lead. They all had their FBI vests on, a sight which was way more attractive than it should have been. JJ and Reid stayed at the entrance to make sure nobody got out.

  “Everybody, please stay calm,” JJ called out, putting her hands up non threateningly. “Everything is okay, but we need you all to stay sitting exactly where you are.”

  A commotion came from the conference room and against your better judgment, you turned your head to watch what was going on. It wasn’t just one person getting arrested, it was every partner. You watched as Aaron spun Julian DuPont around by the wrist and pushed his face down on the conference table and oh, the FBI vest was nothing compared to watching Aaron arrest somebody.

  If anybody asked you if you got turned on during an FBI raid, you would vehemently deny it, but watching Aaron take out his handcuffs made your mind flash back to all those times you were in that same position, cuffed and bent over, completely at Aaron’s mercy. 

  Just as quickly as they came in, the BAU made their arrests and made their way back out. As Aaron passed your desk, his eyes met yours for a brief second and the corner of his mouth quirked up smugly. It was so subtle and quick that even you barely caught it, but you knew that look.

  At least you weren’t the only one in this situation with your mind in the gutter.

  Once the rest of the BAU was out of the building, JJ and Reid started the process of getting everybody else out of the office so that CSI could come in and finish looking around. When you passed by them, both agents greeted you with a warm smile, like the three of you were old friends.

  “Y/N, we’re going to need to get your statement before you go home,” Reid told you as you walked by, and you just nodded in confirmation.

  Once you got outside, you were immediately greeted by some agent named Anderson. He needed to get your statement on the work you did with the team, and you quickly gave him the PG version of the story. Your mind, however, was more focused on finding Aaron, who you knew had to be somewhere in the crowd. God, how long did it take to write down a simple statement?

  “I’ll take it from here, Anderson. Thank you.” 

  Aaron’s voice sent shivers down your spine and you spun around to look at him. You brought your bottom lip in between your teeth. “Nice arrest, although I’m surprised. Mr. DuPont doesn’t even drive himself to work, I can’t imagine him waiting out to kill somebody.”

  “That’s because he hired hitmen,” Aaron explained. “The victims were all bribing judges to get their cases dismissed, and all of those dismissed cases looked really bad for his prosecuting record.”

  You shrugged, placing your hands on his hips. “Probably not as bad as prison, though.”

  That actually got a laugh out of Aaron, but he quickly composed himself as another agent walked past the two of you. “Yeah, he’s not going to be practicing law ever again.” 

  You opened your mouth to say something - maybe to invite him over? You weren’t totally sure - when one of the CSI’s came over to ask Aaron something.

  Aaron waved him off, telling him that he would be there in a moment, before turning back to you. “My house will be empty all weekend,” he whispered, looking around to make sure nobody was watching. “Pack a bag, come over.”

  Before you could even answer him, Aaron had already taken off. You made your way towards the metro so that you could run home before heading to Aaron’s. You had to fight the smile that was growing on your face when Aaron mentioned packing a bag. Not only was it an unspoken promise of a weekend full of sex, it also meant that he was planning on making room for you to keep some of your stuff at his house. The two of you were quickly falling back into your old routines, and it was weirdly comforting.

  When you got to your house, you made a split second decision to change out of your work clothes into a more casual outfit, although it didn’t matter much what you were wearing. It’s not like it was going to stay on for very long. As you packed your bag, you ordered an Uber, knowing it would get you to Aaron’s place faster than the metro. 

  Sure, you were a little impatient, but it had been so long since you had spent the night at Aaron’s place. It always intrigued you how different it was at his house than it was at yours. You were just staying in a shoebox apartment while you were in college - something liveable and temporary until after you graduated and got a job where you could put actual roots down. Your decor was fairly minimum, an assortment of knick-knacks and photos of your friends.

  Aaron’s place was different. It was a certifiable, adult house with framed art and random decorative bowls scattered around. All of his kitchenware was a part of a matching set and his living room looked like all the pieces were picked out by an interior designer. In a weird way, being at Aaron’s house gave you a glimpse of the life you could have in just a few years. Sometimes, it was easy to imagine that you were a part of his world.

  You couldn’t think like that, though. Especially not when he greeted you at his door with an eager kiss, pulling you in so that you were pressed against him.

  “I’m going to use this entire weekend,” Aaron mumbled against your lips in between kisses. His hands slid up your sides, pulling your shirt off almost immediately. “To thoroughly and completely ruin you, until you can only say my name.” 

  Your fingers tangled in his hair as you smiled into the kiss, your fingers already working on the buttons of his shirt. A soft moan escaped your lips, which only encouraged him to deepen the kiss.

  The two of you stumbled towards Aaron’s bedroom, only detaching your lips when absolutely necessary and leaving a trail of clothes behind you. You needed to be naked, to feel your bare skin pressed against his. His hands were impossibly everywhere all at once - running up your thighs, cupping your breasts, and gripping your hips so hard that it was bound to leave bruises. Your body burned everywhere he touched and soon all you could think about was him and how badly you wanted him to touch you where it mattered.

  Once you got to his bedroom, Aaron pressed you against the wall. You tried to grind against him, but he moved one of his hands onto your hips so that he could hold you in place. His lips moved from your mouth to your neck, sucking just enough to make your back arch. “You have no idea how often I thought of you this week. How hard it was to listen to you and not think about how you sound when you’re begging for me. How badly I needed you.”

  Your nail scratched down his back lightly, just enough to elicit a soft hiss from him. “Desperation is unbecoming on you, Aaron,” you teased, knowing that would get a reaction out of him.

  It worked. One of his hands stayed on your hip, pressing you firmly against the wall, while his other hand tangled itself in your hair, pulling your head back so that your face was lifted up towards him. He kept you at an arm's distance as his eyes raked your body up and down hungrily.

  “I’m desperate?” he said scornfully. “Coming from the girl who is so needy that she couldn’t stay away from her phone for more than a few minutes, just waiting for me to want you. I could have called you at any time, and you would have dropped everything just to let me use you, isn’t that right? You’d let me do anything to you, just like the filthy slut you are.”

  You visibility gulped at his statement but you nodded obediently, which earned you a sharp tug of your hair.

  “Yes, Aaron, fuck ,” you gasped out. “I would have let you do anything at any time, just please…”

  Aaron gave you a predatory grin as the hand on your hip slowly made its way up your stomach until it cupped your right breast, thumbing lightly over your nipple. It wasn’t enough to get any real pleasure, but it made you moan all the same.

   “You did such a good job this week,” he murmured, looking at you almost worshipfully like he wanted to commit you to memory.  “I was going to give you whatever you wanted tonight. But maybe that would make me too desperate .”

  You tried to wiggle out of his grasp, but it was no use. “I- I-” you stuttered out. You couldn’t think straight.

  “I- I-,” Aaron mocked. “I thought you were a lot more intelligent than that. Come on, Y/N, whatever you want. Use your words. Unless pleasure’s turned you into a stupid whore.” He punctuated the last word with a light spank to your clit, which made you cry out and your legs instinctively try to close.

  “I want you to use your mouth,” you begged, arching your back in a pitiful attempt to create some form of contact. Your shoulders pressed against the wall was the only thing keeping you upright.

  “Where?” he asked all too casually.

  Your breathing was still shaky at best, but you forced yourself to make eye contact with Aaron. He looked back at you expectantly, waiting patiently for your answer.

  You slowly raised your hand to point to your left breast, which so far had been woefully ignored. “Here,” you said hesitantly, not sure whether or not he was going to tease you. While Aaron always gave you what you asked for eventually, that didn’t mean he wouldn’t make you beg for it first.

  To his credit, however, Aaron immediately bent down and attached his mouth to your nipple, his teeth gently scraping over the sensitive flesh. His eyes never left yours, he wanted to watch your reaction. 

  Feeling more confident, you cupped the sides of his face and pulled him off you, and the sound it made was obscene. “I want you to eat me out,” you whispered, blushing as you said it. “I want to feel myself cum on your face, please .”

  Aaron smirked as he slid down to his knees, kissing all the way down your stomach. “Good girl, you asked so nicely,” he mumbled against your skin and it sent shivers up your spine. He hooked one of your legs over his shoulder, giving him a perfect few of your pussy, slick with your arousal. “Look at you, dripping down your thighs before I’ve even started. Desperation is unbecoming on you, Y/N,” he mocked. He was using your words against you, and you didn’t even care. You just wanted him to do something, anything.

  Aaron ran a finger through your folds, ghosting over your clit. You hips bucked, desperate for more contact, but his finger was already gone. “Look at me,” he ordered, and as soon as you did, you were greeted with the image of Aaron admiring the wetness that was covering his finger. Then he stuck the finger in his mouth, smirking as he did, and you moaned out at the sight. “You taste so good, Y/N.”

  “Please, Aaron, I need you to- oh! ” you begged, but you were cut off by Aaron licking a strip up your center, still avoiding your clit.

  His hands came around and grabbed onto your ass as he got to work, lapping through your folds. You tangled your hands in his hair, rocking your hips against his mouth, craving more . His tongue teased at your clit, humming every once in a while in a way that sent vibrations throughout you. Without warning, he pushed two fingers into you curling them in just the right spot.

  As Aaron’s fingers pumped in and out of you, his lips focused solely on your clit. He flicked it once with his tongue before sucking, relishing in the way you moaned out his name. You tightened your grip in Aaron’s hair as your first orgasm hit you, your whole body shaking and a string of expletives leaving your mouth. But that didn’t stop Aaron.

  He added a third finger and replaced his mouth with his thumb on your clit. “You’re going to give me another one,” he practically growled. “And then I’m going to fuck you until you’re a whining mess. This is what you asked for isn’t it?”

  When you didn’t answer right away, he turned his head to the side and bit down on the sensitive flesh of your inner thigh, causing you to cry out. He sucked on that same spot for a little before dragging his tongue over the newly formed bruise.

  “Yes, I want that, Aaron,” you cried out. “I want you .”

  He reattached his lips to your folds with newfound vigor, making tight circles around your clit. His free hand snaked up your sides to your breast, pinching and twisting at your nipple. You continued to beg, although you weren’t sure what you were begging for exactly. All you knew was that you were so full of want , want for your second orgasm, and want for Aaron.

  Aaron fucked you with his fingers with ease, as if he had all the time in the world. You ground down on him again, chasing your orgasm the best you could. Your eyes were squeezed shut in pleasure, but you needed more. You opened your eyes, only to be met with Aaron’s blown pupils, eyes full of desire. You could almost feel his smirk as he wrapped his lips around your clit and pulled .

  The heel of your foot dug into his back as you cried out, your second orgasm twice as intense as your first one. Aaron’s fingers kept pumping into you lazily, and even your panting couldn’t cover the filthy sounds it was making. You could feel yourself dripping down your thighs.

  Aaron slowly removed his fingers from you and lightly swiped them over your clit once more as he stood up, which almost made you completely lose your balance, a sob tearing from your mouth.

  He held his glistening fingers in front of your mouth and you opened obediently, moaning as you tasted yourself on him. Your tongue swirled around his fingers, making sure to clean every trace of you off him.

  Aaron removed his fingers from your mouth. “Do you have one more in you?” he asked, and it was softer than you were used to. “It’s okay if you don’t. We have all weekend.”

  “I need your dick in me,” you said in lieu of an answer. “Please, please fuck me.”

  Aaron pulled you to his bed and you all but collapsed onto your back, your legs still shaking from your back to back orgasms. Aaron crawled on top of you, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake, all the way from your stomach to your mouth.

  “You’re so beautiful when you come for me,” he whispered, teasing your entrance with the head of his cock. All of his movements were gentle, bordering on caring. “Yelling out my name so that everybody can hear that you’re mine .”

  He pressed into you slowly, his first few thrusts shallow, and you could see that it was taking all of his willpower to keep teasing you like this. You dragged your nails down his back, not caring if it left marks on him.

  “Aaron,” you whimpered, bucking your hips to try and get more movement. “Please fuck me. I need more.”

  Aaron was always good at giving you what you wanted.

  His hips snapped into you harshly, and you had to attach your lips to his shoulder to keep from screaming out. Aaron thrusted into you hard and fast, wanting to feel every inch of you. He stretched you in all the best ways and your back arched off the bed. You were holding on to Aaron like a lifeline, and all he could do was grunt out your name over and over, repeating it like a prayer. 

  Your third orgasm came fast, spreading through your body like a wildfire, and you could feel the tears prick at the corners of your eyes at the overstimulation. Aaron’s thrusts became more desperate and harsher as he felt you squeeze around him. He dropped his head to your shoulder, his breathing ragged and you could tell that he was so close-

  “Cum for me… Fill me up,” you purred into Aaron’s ear, and that’s all it took for him to finish, holding himself deep inside you as his warmth filled you. The two of you stayed like that for a moment, both trying to catch your breath. You brought your head up to kiss Aaron, slowly and deliberately and filled with… something . You couldn’t figure out what it was yet.

  Aaron pulled out of you slowly and flopped onto the bed next to you, but he reached over and held your hand. The two of you laid like that for several moments, giving yourselves time to come back down to reality. Finally, Aaron rolled on his side to check on you. You admired the flush on his body, especially as it rose to his cheeks and made him look like he was practically glowing.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, his thumb rubbing lazy circles on your hand. “Can I do anything?” 

  You turned your head to smile at him, giving his hand a squeeze, before sitting up. Aaron was always so careful about aftercare, which you were immensely appreciative of. “Oh, I’m fine, I’m just going to go to the bathroom. A UTI might ruin the mood,” you joked.

  When you returned, Aaron was already in a pair of pajama pants and sitting in bed. He had also laid out one of his shirts for you, which caused your stomach to do flips. Despite the fact that you actually did pack pajamas, you chose to wear his shirt. You could feel his eyes watching your every movement as you made your way back into bed, leaning back against the headboard.

  Aaron placed an arm around your shoulders and you leaned into him, catching his lips in another kiss, this one soft and sensual. You placed your hand on his bare chest as the kiss deepened, and Aaron’s fingers ghosting over your skin sent shivers down your spine.

  “So,” you murmured against his lips. “What are your plans for me this weekend?” It was partially a joke, but you wanted to be as prepared as possible for just how sore you were going to be on Monday after an entire three days of being thoroughly wrecked by Aaron.

  Aaron’s lips curved up into a smile as he dropped a kiss on the top of your head, letting his lips linger for just a second too long. “Hm, we can play it by ear. Although, I was thinking Indian for dinner tomorrow night?”

  You were too old to get butterflies, but there was something so soft and so sincere in his reply that it made your stomach do flips. Aaron yawned, probably not even giving a second thought to his reply, and pulled you in closer to him. 

  “Yeah,” you conceded, closing your eyes. “Indian sounds good.” You could deal with the butterflies later.

[13uswntimagines]

Baby Mamas Don’t Lift Boxes (Christen Press x Reader)

Request: Reader and christen are going to have a baby and they need to tell the team Plus christen making a nursery for their baby

For the record, you would like the jury to know that spending the team’s only day off unloading packages was not your idea. You would have much rather spent the day cuddled up on the couch next to your amazing wife, rubbing her belly and talking to the little thumper inside her belly. 

But no. Christen was dead set on finishing the nursery before she was past the 4-month mark of pregnancy, and she insisted that forcing your teammates to help would be the perfect way to tell them all that the two of you were expecting. You had been outvoted (she claimed the kid was on her side), so here you were, opening the door for your very frustrated teammates. 

“How many fucking boxes did you order?” Kelley grunted, carrying a very large package through the door, nodding her head to your 20 other teammates who were carrying objects similar to her. 

You opened your mouth to reply, only to be cut off by your wife. 

“Definitely not enough” She smiled, gesturing for the team to come inside and trapping her arms around your middle. You sighed. It was easier to let her take control and to follow her lead than to fight with her. You didn’t want to add any stress to your already complicated lives. Plus, she was hot when she took control. 

“What are you renovating, your entire house?” Tobin grunted as she attempted to cart a very large box up your porch steps on her own. That box had to be the crib. 

“No, just the spare bedroom” You shook your head, stepping in and grabbing the other end of the very large package and heaving it up in your arms. The weight was astounding. What the fuck was this thing made of? Steal? What kind of baby needed a ten thousand pound crib? 

“What, you need an extra room for all your sex equipment?” Kelley joked, jumping in and supporting the middle of the box, grunting when she realized just how heavy this thing was. 

“What are you talking about Kelley? What sex equipment?” You grumbled, slowly maneuvering, as to not scratch the paint in your entranceway, and trying not to drop the freaking Boulder Chris had ordered. 

“You’re making a sex dungeon, aren’t you? Like, who needs that many unmarked boxes for anything not sex-related?” She rolled her eyes, helping you get the thing through the bedroom door without dinging it. 

“What the fuck do you think we’re into?” You asked exasperatedly, dumping the stupid box and tapping it lightly with your foot for good measure. You knew plenty about odd sexual proclivities from your teammates, but you and Chris weren’t really into that stuff. Well, not hardcore into that stuff. A girl can experiment. 

“I can’t help it, you’ve been calling pressie mama for months,” Kelley said, rolling her eyes again and making a face of feigned disgust, before teasingly bumping your shoulder as you descended the stairs. You started at the back of her head in shock. 

“That’s not… we’re not…”  You sputtered, unsure how to get the words -Christen’s pregnant- to come out of your mouth. Thankfully, you didn’t have to. Your wife wrapped herself around you, glaring at your best friend. 

“What she means is that you misheard, Kelley.” 

You scratched the back of your neck, coughing lightly at your wife’s dominant voice, and Kelley’s jaw-dropped expression, hiding your laugh. 

“Let’s get to work, these boxes aren’t going to get upstairs by themselves,” Megan interrupted, pointing to the huge pile of boxes by the couch. You scrunched your eyes. You knew she was going to go overboard designing the nursery, but you didn’t think it’d be this overboard. 

Kelley and Tobin groaned, throwing their heads back. You sighed, kissing your wife’s cheek and patting their arms. You grabbed a box and headed back up the stairs, Kelley not far behind you

“What Chris, not gonna help us?” Tobin asked from the bottom step, and you stopped, Turing to her with a smirk, the sarcastic comment on the tip of your tongue. But your wife beat you to it. 

“And miss the show? I’ll be providing the snacks,” She smirked, gesturing to you, and your tank top. There was nothing quite like you showing off your muscles. 

“No pickles in the ice cream please?” You called out, with an eye roll, beginning to ascend the stairs again. These boxes weren’t going to move themselves. 

“That was once,” She huffed indignantly, crossing her arms and jutting her lip out. 

“You do whatever you want babe,” You shouted back over your shoulder, ignoring the whipping sounds your fellow teammates were making. 

“Thanks babe! Maybe peanut butter, Or do I want fudge, Hey Alex, which sounds better, pickles with chocolate or peanut butter?” Her conversation with Alex getting quieter as you got closer to your destination. You glanced at the box in your arms and placed it with the other ones that were in the same category. It would help when you had to unpack them all later. 

“Your so fucking whipped dude, like you’re seriously going to let her sit on the couch with Alex, ruining our snacks?” Kelley laughed as she Willy-Nilly set down the box she was carrying. 

“Absolutely. Baby mamas don’t lift boxes, you should know that. You have Charlie after all” You nodded, blurting out the news. If anyone deserved to know, it was totally the women dealing with your wife’s spending spree. Their jaws dropped in shock, and their eyes widened, at least now they knew why you were so doting. 

“Press is pregnant!?”

[myhockeyworld87]

Ruined - Jamie Benn - Part 2

Word Count: 5,716

POV: Jamie

Warnings: Language, Smut, NSFW, talks about losing virginity

Notes: Here is the next part right away. Hope you guys enjoy this. Happy Reading!!!

Ruined Masterlist

Throwing on some shorts and a t-shirt, you headed down to the kitchen to whip up a quick protein shake before Tyler got there for your morning workout. With the season just around the corner, you’d pushed training into high gear, Tyler coming to your place every morning before you’d head off and workout with your trainer. In just a few short weeks training camp would be in full swing and you wanted to be in your best shape to make a run for the cup. But the Stanley Cup wasn’t on your mind as you turned the blender on, the grinding sound echoing through the empty house. Empty was the keyword there. You were tired of being alone, tired of going out to the clubs, ending the night with some mindless hookup. Maybe it was the fact that Jordie had finally popped the question to his long-time girlfriend Jess and the two seemed blissfully happy, that was making you want to settle down, or maybe it was seeing your sister with her little girl and longing for a family of your own. Whatever it was, you wished that you could just meet the perfect woman and fall madly in love. 

 The problem was you were too picky. They were either too tall or too blonde or maybe it was not blonde enough, then there were the ones that didn’t talk or were too chatty. You seemed to find something wrong with each and every woman you dated. Hell, your longest relationship only lasted six months and you’d only kept her around that long for appearance sake. You wanted a meaningful relationship with the girl of your dreams. It didn’t seem like much to ask for.

 “Hey, I see you're getting new neighbors.” Tyler’s voice brought you out of your musings and you glanced at him as he walked into your kitchen. “Well not neighbors exactly, since it’s like two houses up, but the woman who’s moving in is hot as hell.”

 “Do you mean in Doc Lundin’s place?” Dr. Lundin had been the team doctor for the Stars for the last several years and had finally decided to retire. You’d heard his practice had been looking at a young and upcoming doctor to take his place but didn’t know that they’d hired anyone. 

 “Yep,” Tyler finally answered. “Must be the new doctor’s hot wife. It’s a shame she’s married because, DAMN!” He gave a low whistle of approval. “I’m telling you, I’d be all over that.”

 “Don’t you have a girlfriend?”

 “We’re in an open relationship.” All you could do was roll your eyes, for all Tyler’s relationships were open, at least on his end. “But hey, if you wanted a crack at her, I’d give you first dibs, since it’s been a while.”

 “Gee thanks,” your sarcasm was not lost on your best friend.

 “I’m just saying it’s been a bit since you’ve gone out with anyone.” This you already knew and were just contemplating moments ago. “Maybe we should go for a run while she’s still out directing the movers.”

 “Why don’t we leave the new doc’s wife in peace at least for a day or so.”

 “You’re no fun.” Tyler downed half your drink but luckily, you’d made enough for another glass, before you headed out to your pool house that had now been turned into a gym. The two of you spent the morning and afternoon training before Tyler headed back to his house.

 It was just after dinner when you decided to go for a run, now that the sun was setting and the Dallas heat wouldn’t make your shoes melt to the pavement. You thought you’d head up to see Jordie and Jess, who only lived about six blocks away. It would be a short little run, but still, a way to get some exercise in. As you stepped out of your house, it was still a bit steamy, so you tossed your shirt off, and flipped your cap backward before heading up the street. The moving truck seemed to be gone, so you guess whoever it was that captured Tyler’s attention was busy inside unpacking. You were so absorbed in checking out the house you didn’t realize that someone was coming around the corner at you until your bodies collided. Your hands immediately went to her hips to steady her. “I’m so sorry. I wasn’t watching…” you started to say while she was apologizing to you at the same time. It wasn’t until you looked at her face that recognition hit, then all words died on the tip of your tongue. “(Y/N), is that you?” She didn’t need to answer for you to know that it was her. This was your (Y/N), the first girl you ever kissed, the first girl you ever slept with, and the only girl you ever loved. Though you’d ruined all that. Standing there, you took in all of her features and you were reminded of how much you’d loved her back then. How much that first and only time with her had meant to you. 

 You’d been so nervous driving all the way to Vancouver with (Y/N), but she was more nervous. So, you took her hand and held it the whole way, occasionally dropping kisses here and there. The foot that wasn’t driving, bounced uncontrollably up and down with anticipation of the night to come. You were pretty sure you were wearing a hole in the flooring of the car. It had to be the longest car ride you’d ever had. “Did you maybe want to get something to eat before we head to the house?” You asked (Y/N) hoping to break some of the silence that was filled only by the stereo in the car. 

 “Yeah, we could do that.” She glanced over at you and gave you a weak smile.

 “(Y/N), we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.” You totally meant the words you’d just spoken, for you in no way wanted her to feel pressured about having sex with you. This should be something you both wanted.

 “No, I want to. Don’t you?” Her voice picked up a little bit, the sound more reassuring than the smile she gave only moments ago.

 “I want to, too.” God, you sounded like an idiot. “I went to the pharmacy and got protection, so you don’t have to worry.”

 “Oh, you didn’t have to.” This time it was your turn to look over at her, trying to see if you misunderstood her statement before scanning the road again. “I’m on the pill, have been for a while.” She said by way of explanation. “My mom thought it would be best, once she found out I was actually dating someone, but we can use the condoms too if you want.”

 “I mean…uh…” were you really having a conversation about birth control methods? You supposed it was the adult thing to do. “If you think we should, we can.”

 (Y/N) turned in the seat to fully look at you then. “Ok, so this will probably sound stupid.” Your head bobbed back and forth between the road and the girl you were in love with.

 “(Y/N), nothing you say is stupid. You’re the smartest person I know.”

 She leaned over and kissed your cheek. “Thanks,” she took a deep breath. “Anyhow, I kind of don’t want to use a condom if we don’t have to, at least this time.” You weren’t quite following her thinking so you remained silent for her to explain. “Like, it’s both our first times, so there’s not a chance of us getting a sexually transmitted disease or anything. We just really have to worry about getting pregnant. Which since I’m on the pill, and before you say anything, I take it the same time every day, so no worries there. I think we’re safe on that account.” You nodded your agreement, for it was just like (Y/N) to be so precise about something. “But the real reason I don’t want you to use it is…” she hesitated, almost as if she was embarrassed to tell you why. She certainly had to know that there was nothing to be ashamed of, especially with what the two of you were about to do. 

 “Just tell me (Y/N). I promise I won’t laugh or make fun of you or anything.” You squeezed her hand giving her a little added courage.

 “I just want to feel you.” Her face started to turn a combination of pink and red, which looked totally adorable on her. “You know nothing in between us. I just really want to know what it feels like.” Fuck, you wanted that too. 

 “Yeah, that does sound nice.” You tried to downplay it though inside you were a jumble of nerves now, and thinking about what it would feel like to be inside her only made those magnify. What if you spent the moment your cock dipped inside her pussy? What if she didn’t cum? There were so many thoughts whirling around in your head, that you were ready to explode, and in more ways than one. 

 “So, then you agree? No condom.” (Y/N) asked you, drawing you back to the present.

 “Yeah, no condom.” The car grew silent again and you could feel your hand sweating as it held (Y/N)’s. There was only about another half-hour left in the drive. “So, where were you thinking to get something to eat.” You changed the subject hoping to take both of your minds off what would happen later. You stopped off at a little burger joint that (Y/N)’s family always went to when they were in town. You couldn’t stop grinning at each other all through the meal. It was really quite ridiculous. 

 Afterward, you headed over to the house. You carried both your bags in. “Umm…where should I put these?”

 “Oh, I don’t really have a bedroom here. I just sleep in one of the guest rooms, so we can just use one of them. They’re upstairs.” You followed her up the stairs, as she led the way to the bedroom. Inside was a massive four-poster king-size bed that had curtains draping down from it. Both of you just sort of stared at it for a full minute, letting the weight of what was about to happen sink in. “You can just put our stuff over there.” She pointed to the window that had two chairs sitting by it.

 It was late in the afternoon and you weren’t really sure if you should wait until dark to do this or start now. Everything felt too planned out, except for the exact timing. “Did you want to…” you trailed off, unable to put your thoughts into words. 

 “Oh…umm…yeah,” (Y/N) answered and you took a step closer to her. Your hands went to her waist, as you pulled her closer to you, before dipping your head down to kiss her lips. It was awkward, just like it had been the first time you kissed, but then your tongue slipped inside her mouth and you felt her melt into you. She pulled back though suddenly. “Oh, I almost forgot.” She stepped over to her bag, rifling around inside. “I brought these.” She pulled out a couple of glass candles. “I thought…well I don’t know what I thought, but you know, they always have them lit in the movies.”

 You smiled over at her, taking a couple of them and setting them on the nightstand and dresser. “Do you have something to light them with?”

 “Oh, one sec.” She took off downstairs and you could hear her rummaging around the empty house. You gazed at the bed. Should you turn the covers down? Maybe take some of the pillows off? You were contemplating what to do when (Y/N) came back in. “I found a couple more, and this.” She held out a pack of matches and you took them, lighting the candles that she’d placed throughout the room. She pulled the blinds down on the windows and it cast the room in a romantic glow, which reminded you of the item you brought to add to the romance.

 You pulled your mp3 player out of your bag and found the love song list you’d created for tonight and turned it on. You prayed that (Y/N) wouldn’t think that it was cheesy. When you finally turned around, she had the most adorable smile on her face. As you took the couple steps to close the distance between the two of you, she took a step back, and suddenly all those nerves from the car ride were back. “There’s just one more thing.” This time she grabbed her bag and headed into the bathroom. 

 While she was in there, you shucked off your shoes, then decided to get rid of your socks as well, since it would just be awkward to have them on. Grabbing the small bottle of Listerine, you had packed, you swished it around in your mouth then looked around for someplace to spit it out. There wasn’t any, so you just swallowed the small amount, coughing as you did. Lastly, you threw off the sweatshirt you had on. The fewer clothes you had to take off the better was your thought. You were tugging down the plain black t-shirt you had on, when (Y/N) stepped back into the bedroom, clad in a short silk robe. Your mouth went dry. Thoughts of what was underneath or what wasn’t filled your brain, both the one in your head and down below. Fuck, you needed to think of something else or this was going to end before it even started. You tamped down the lust that was threatening to boil over and walked towards (Y/N). “You look,” you shook your head trying to come up with the right word but there was only one. “Beautiful.”

 “Thanks,” she mumbled back as a blush stained her cheeks. “I’m nervous.”

 “Me too,” you admitted and you wiped your palms off before reaching for her. They slid around her waist then up her back as you looked her in the eyes. “Are you sure?”

 “Yeah,” she breathed out knowing that you were asking if she still wanted to have sex. You kissed her then like you had so many times in the past. Her arms slid up around your neck and you deepened the kiss. When you heard her moan, you let your hands roam to the belt of her robe, which came easily undone. Your hands roamed up her sides where you felt her lace bra. You were dying to know what she looked like in it. All the times that you and (Y/N) had done anything sexual together, she’d never been completely naked nor had you. It was always something hurried in the back of your car or on the couch when no one was home. Now though, you could drink your fill of her as you were alone with nothing and no one to interrupt you. 

 Gently, you pulled back from the kiss so you could gaze at her. Her body was covered in white lace, and you wondered if she had done it on purpose; sort of a nod to giving her virginity away to you. Unconsciously, you licked your lips as you took in the swell of her breasts and the curve of her hips. She was sheer perfection. “Damn,” you hissed out. “How did I get so lucky?” She giggled at your comment then let the robe slide off her shoulders; the view now even better than a second ago and you were finding it hard to breathe. 

 You felt yourself get hard just standing there staring at her. “Jame,” she said breaking you out of the spell. 

 “Yeah…uh…sorry.” You blinked hard, then took her hand and led her over to the bed, where you kissed her again. Slowly, you leaned her back onto the mattress, as your body hovered over hers. This part was nothing new, you’d made out with (Y/N) hundreds of times. It was what came next you were unsure of. Her hands slid under your shirt, and she bunched it up so that you could climb out of it. It fell to the ground somewhere in the bedroom. She then reached for the button on your jeans, but you knew if she took them off now, you’d be done. So, you rolled her to her side and followed her, unclasping her bra the minute her back was free. Your legs tangled with hers and you felt her hips gently rock into your thigh. She wanted this just as much as you did but you needed to make it good.

 Last night, you’d pulled Jordie aside and told him of your plans, purely so you could ask his advice. He’d chirped you, of course, for not having done the deed with (Y/N) sooner. But when you threatened to just leave, he stopped. He gave you a ton of information, go down on her first to help her relax, make sure she was wet before you even tried to stick your dick in her, go slow because it will probably hurt her, and the last bit was, make sure you didn’t bust your load too soon. The last part was the one you were truly worried about.

 (Y/N)’s bra now forgotten, you focused your attention there as you twisted both of your bodies so that she was now lying flat on her back. Kissing your way down her neck, you first took one nipple and then the other into your mouth. She moaned and it went straight to your groin. Thank god you still had your jeans on or you’d had spent right then and there. There were times you’d spend a good hour, just toying with breast but tonight was not going to be one of them. Working your way down her stomach, you kissed her right above where her panties were. The cute little white lace panties barely covered her pussy, and your mouth salivated just thinking about tasting her. You hooked your fingers around the elastic at the side, then started to shimmy them over her hips. (Y/N) rose up to help you rid herself of the flimsy garment.

 Setting back on your heels, you drank in the sight of her bare body. You’d never seen her totally naked before, so you took a moment to just drink in the sight of her. One leg slightly bent, her arms off to the sides, but fidgeting as you gazed at her. “Jamie?” Her voice wobbled slightly and you could tell you were making her somewhat nervous, yet you couldn’t take your eyes off her.

 “Sorry,” you said a blush coming to your cheeks. “You’re just…perfect.” She smiled, then sat up, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for a kiss that had you wanting more. “Lie back,” you told her after kissing her breathless. She did and you took your hands and glided them from her ankles to her inner thighs; spreading her legs wide, so you could settle in between what you knew was your own little piece of heaven on earth. You grinned up at her before laying your tongue flat against her sweet little pussy, then licking between her folds. Her hips bucked forward even at the first contact. Your smile growing wider knowing that you were turning her on. You couldn’t help looking up at her as you flicked your tongue back and forth over her clit. Her hands fisted into the sheets and she moaned out something that you couldn’t quite hear. 

 Spreading her pussy lips with your fingers, you dipped your tongue inside her. “Jamie,” she cried out, and then you felt her hands threading through your hair urging you to continue. She tasted so sweet as you licked up and down her slit then flicked her clit. When she was wet and wanting more, you slid a finger inside her, mimicking what you wanted to do with your cock. Just the thought of being able to slide it into her warm and wet pussy had your cock hardening to granite. Fuck, you needed to get her off, so that you could feel her wrap around your dick before you lost your load. You made that come-hither motion, finding that spongy little spot up inside her. “Oh God,” she moaned out and you felt her legs start to tremble, as your hands kept them from clamping down on your head. Your tongue worked tirelessly on her little nub, alternating between flicking and sucking on it, as you fingered her. “I’m gonna…cum.” (Y/N) barely got the last word out and you felt her pussy spasm around your finger while her whole body bucked upwards. You felt a rush of wetness hit your lips and as much as you wanted to lick up every bit of her essence; you didn’t. 

 She slowly came back to reality with you, as you moved back up the length of her body until your lips were locked with hers. This time when her hands went to your waist you didn’t stop her as she undid first the button then the zipper. (Y/N) tried to help you shimmy out of your jeans but it was no use, so you rolled off her and wiggled out of them yourself. Her giggle went straight to your groin. “We have time, Jame.” You knew she was right but this was a moment you’d been waiting for, for a while now. You tossed the jeans and then your boxer briefs to the floor, before rolling on your side to face (Y/N).

 “I know…it’s just…” you couldn’t quite put it into words, but she nodded her understanding, bringing her hand to your cheek and slowly kissing you. Your hand roamed up her bare back, pressing her close against your skin. She felt so soft and supple in your hands, and you rolled her onto her back, your body looming over hers as your lips and tongues molded together. She moaned into your mouth, and you broke the kiss looking down at her. There was a questioning look in her eyes at your actions. “Are you sure you want to do this? You can tell me no right now and we’ll stop.” It would kill you, but all (Y/N) had to do was say the word.

 “I want this Jamie. I want you.” She cupped your face and brought it down to mere inches above hers. “I love you.”

 Your lips spread into the widest smile that ever graced your face and it had nothing to do with her saying yes to sex. “I love you too, (Y/N),” you told her and although they were only five words, they were the truest thing you’d ever spoken in your life. This wasn’t some fleeting crush that a sixteen-year-old boy had on a girl. This was true love in every sense of the word. You’d known your feelings for her the first time you’d met, now they were just intensified and what would happen next would bind you two together. 

 Her legs fell open, letting you work your way between them. Taking your cock in your hand, you slid it in between her damp pussy lips. She gasped, breaking the kiss and allowing you to stare into her eyes. “Let me know if I’m hurting you,” you hissed out as you nudged forward just an inch. Her walls surrounded your cock and it felt like heaven. Jordie was right, you just wanted to push all the way into her and shoot your load, but you couldn’t or wouldn’t do that to (Y/N). This had to be good for her too. She bit her lip, which made you wonder if she was in pain or if it felt as wonderful for her as it did for you. Another inch forward and you felt a barrier in your way. You knew enough about the female anatomy to know what it was and that going forward would change everything, not only for (Y/N) but you too. You leaned down and gave her another kiss, hoping to ease some of the tension that you could feel coursing through her body. When you felt her relax a bit into the kiss, you pressed all the way forward burying yourself deep inside her. (Y/N) froze and you pulled your head back to look at her, as all the blood in your body went directly to your penis. It took every ounce of your being, not to move. Sweat beading across your forehead as you asked, “Are you ok?” You couldn’t tell if she was breathing or not. She had to be, right? 

 Finally, she inhaled deeply and it was as if you were taking a breath with her as the two of you were finally joined as one. “I think so…I...just need a second.” God, you weren’t sure you could last that long. Her breathing started to even out, as yours became irregular trying to keep your body in check. “I think…” she wiggled and you hissed in a breath. “Yeah…I’m ok…maybe if you…” she didn’t finish what she was saying as your hips moved of their own accord, just a thrust in and out.

 “Fuck.” You were cursing more at yourself for moving than anything else, but damn if she didn’t feel good. 

 “It’s ok,” (Y/N) moaned out, her arms reaching around to your back urging you on. “Keep doing that.” Those words were like music to your ears and you found yourself surging forward back into the warm cavernous heat of her pussy, then pulling back out. 

 “God you feel so…” Good, just didn’t seem like the right word, but at the same time, your brain wasn’t exactly looking for another one. Your cock started to twitch, your balls getting that familiar tightening. You couldn’t cum, not yet, you’d only been inside her for a few minutes. You wanted this to last longer; wanted her to cum too, but there was no more fighting it. “I think I’m…”

 “Yes, Jame, cum inside me.” That’s all it took and you thrust one last time before shooting your load in her as she reached up and kissed your neck. Stars clouded your vision, as your climax hit you. A strangled groan leaving your lips. You’d never came that hard in your life, as you collapsed on top of her.

 It took a second for you to basically regain consciousness. “Shit, I’m sorry. I’m probably crushing you.”

 (Y/N) laughed. “Actually, I kind of like it.” Your laughter joined hers until you started to wonder if it was appropriate for sex. You could feel your cock softening inside her, so slid it out of her as you rolled to your side. She whimpered slightly.

 “Fuck, baby, did I hurt you?”

 “No, I mean…it was a little uncomfortable at first but…then it felt so good.” She was on her side now gazing at you.

 You brushed a stray lock of hair off her face. “Sorry, I couldn’t last longer, so you could…well you know.” It still felt awkward talking about getting off, even after what the two of you had just done.

 “Don’t be. It felt good, Jame…really good….and maybe,” she ducked her head down into your chest, suddenly shy and mumbled something incoherent.

 “Babe,” you said, lifting her chin with your thumb and index finger. “I can’t hear what you said.”

 There was the cutest blush on her cheeks. “I just thought…maybe we could do it again. Like later tonight and well maybe tomorrow before we leave.” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, her words were like a dream come true. Damn right, you wanted to do it again; as many times as she’d let you.

 “Yeah, baby. I definitely want that.” Your lips connected with her, and after what the two of you had just shared, (Y/N) not only stole your heart, but your soul. That night you made love to her again, only then you made sure she came with you, just like you did in the morning before you left. Those twenty-four hours would forever be embedded in your brain and your heart, and as you dropped her off at her friend's house, so she could maintain her cover you knew that you would love only (Y/N) for the rest of your life.

 Now, here she was fourteen long years later back in your arms. You shook yourself making sure that you weren’t dreaming. She still looked the same, only better; all hips and curves and things that made men lay awake dreaming about at night. As you took in her features, it struck you then. All those other women the ones you’d found something wrong with all the time; didn’t have anything wrong at all. It was just, they weren’t (Y/N). They were only filling a void from the time that you’d ruined everything until now. She was the woman that everyone else had to measure up to, only now she was someone else’s. Fuck, the thought made your head spin. Had it truly taken fourteen years to get her back only to lose her?

 “Hello, Jamie,” she finally spoke and her voice washed over you taking you back to that day and the way she’d called out your name when you were inside her. Your cock hardened instantaneously. She was pressed close to your body and you wondered if she could feel it. 

 “It’s so good to see you.” They were the first words out of your mouth that made sense but they were also the most truthful. It was just too bad that the look on her face didn’t reflect the same. “Sorry, I’m just in shock seeing you is all.”

 “No, I get it.” She replied. “Do you live around here?”

 “Uh…Yeah, I’m the white house right there.”

 “Oh,” she seemed to be taken back by this knowledge, which was probably understandable. Especially given the fact that her husband was going to be your new team doctor. Nothing like having your ex be your new neighbor. 

 “What about you? What are you doing in Dallas?” Though you knew the answer, you needed to hear the words come out of her mouth as confirmation, for until you did; you held out that small hope that there was a chance to make things right again.

 “Um…well.” It was then that she stepped out of your embrace. You hadn’t realized how naturally she fit back in your hands and that of their own accord they didn’t seem to want to let go. “I just moved here.”

 “Kind of got that with the moving truck and all,” you replied, your hand going to the back of your neck at your awkward comment, though she did smile at your words. 

 “Yeah, I suppose that did give it away.” She shifted her weight from one foot to another. It was a nervous habit of hers that you remember from back in the day.

 “It was hard to miss, but I knew the old owner quite well since he was our team doctor. In fact, I heard our new doc was moving in. I guess I’ll be seeing you and your husband around more.” There you’d finally said it. It was like ripping a bandaid off. Sure, it hurt and all but once it was off the sting started to fade, only this time it didn’t, as a look of confusion crossed her face.

 “Husband?”

 “Oh sorry, my bad. I just assumed you were married. Fiancé then?” Either way, it was going to be awkward as hell seeing her at games and functions, let alone out in their yard. Maybe you’d need to look for a different place. Tyler had just moved recently, you’d have to get the name of his realtor.

 A look crossed her face, and you remembered seeing it once before. It was when you’d tried to talk to her after the whole gossip fiasco. She was angry and you had no clue what you said to make her that way, but this was not how you wanted the conversation to go. “I’m not married or engaged, for that matter.” So it must be a boyfriend then, though that didn’t explain her displeasure with you at the moment. 

 “Geez, (Y/N), I’m really sorry. I just assumed that for you to move all the way here you’d be engaged or married to the guy.”

 “There is no guy Jamie. I’m the new doctor.” A look of shock crossed over your face. Why hadn’t anyone told you she’d gone to study medicine? The obvious answer being you tended not to ask about her when you were back home, only because it hurt too much to think about her being with someone else. Though she wasn’t with someone else, it was just her, and she was now your team doctor, who you’d see almost every day. “I can’t believe that you’d think the only reason I’d move her was for a guy. Incredible! You haven’t changed one bit have you?” 

 “It wasn’t…I didn’t…” She started walking away, just like before when you’d tried to explain what had actually happened. “I just assumed…”

 “Yeah, Jame, you just assumed! That what, I couldn’t be smart enough to earn the MD after my name, or that I’m still only good enough for a quick roll in the hay.” You went to answer but she held up her hand and took a deep breath. “Save it, Jamie. I’m a professional and that’s what I’ll be when I see you at the arena or out, but other than that…we have nothing to say.” With that, she left you standing there speechless as she jogged back up her driveway and into the house. And here you thought you had a second chance, that things weren’t totally ruined between you two. Maybe they weren’t. If anything, her position on the team, meant that you’d be seeing a lot of each other, something you were definitely ok with. You might have messed up all those years ago, and somewhat today, but now you had a chance to turn everything around. Maybe things weren’t quite ruined….yet.

[ao3-sucks]

An Archive of Someone’s Own: my experiences being groomed in fandom circles on AO3

TW: Childhood sexual abuse, grooming, mentions of incest and rape.

I used to be a big writer of fanfiction. It was the logical choice for me. I loved to write and create bold and immersive worlds, and I craved an audience who would enjoy my work as much as I did. Since my writing wasn’t actually good, I needed a community of other amateurs who wouldn’t mind that, and by tweaking my characters and settings into ones from canonical media, I got the audience I so craved.

I started writing fanfiction online when I was 14, posting initially on FanFiction.net and then moving to AO3 a few months later. As I got back into writing original fiction towards the end of high school, I lost interest in this community, and it’s been a long time since I posted anything much on AO3.

I’ve always struggled with the fact I display a lot of symptoms of CSA, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out why. Throughout my teen years, I refused to get changed or bathe when anyone was even vaguely nearby, constantly paranoid about being spied on; I developed a severe touch phobia, and would have frequent panic attacks from something as small as brushing arms with a passerby; I resolutely identified as asexual and refused to get into anything resembling a relationship with others because the very concept disgusted and repulsed me.

Weird, considering I had grown up pretty normal and all of these symptoms had started around my early teens. It was only when I told my friends about my friendship with a 30 year old I had met online that the pieces started falling into place for me.

Child grooming is usually discussed in the context of one adult going out of their way to befriend a child with the goal of lowering their resistance to sexual abuse, through normalisation and friendliness. I’d like to talk about how that worked on the fanfiction website AO3. Since it’s an open website and most communication takes place between anonymous users or accounts in the comments section of a work, there is very little delineation between spaces for adults to discuss whatever dark topics they like and spaces for kids to do the same.

This frequently leads to pretty inappropriate conversations between people of widely varying ages and life experiences, which is how I ended up talking sex as a fourteen year old with people ranging from a couple of years older than me, who were generally okay, to more than twice my age. The 30 year old in question listed on her profile how many pedophilic ships she loved, and she knew my age but pushed me to keep discussing sexual topics with her. Sounds like a red flag, yeah? Well. I was 14, and very stupid.

This 30 year old woman, who I will call Aku (because it’s similar to her screen name and because it’s funny to name her after the bad guy from Samurai Jack) would start conversations with me whenever I posted anything to AO3 and would refuse to take no for an answer when I tried to back out of conversations with her, and since these conversations were public and occurring within comments, I didn’t want to be rude to her since this was taking place on content I was trying to promote.

I told her my age multiple times and she would either pretend she forgot from last time (saying her memory is super bad) or continue as though it was just trivia about me and not a sign she shouldn’t have been pushing me. My primary objection to what she would say to me (since most of it was just her being annoying) was her insistence on sexualising everything I wrote, and her determination to push me into writing pornographic content, which I eventually gave in to.

Yes, she was a terrible person. She emailed me using her personal email address, so I know her full name and place of residence, because she’s an idiot. These emails also contain sexually explicit materials. Nothing much ever happened between us except for these very creepy interactions and the fact we remained online friends for a few years. But here’s the thing: she wasn’t the only person pushing me into creating sexual content. Lots of people would comment on my writing demanding that I show explicit sexual content when I really didn’t want to.

After a while it felt like I couldn’t write a longer, romantic fanfiction without including explicit sexual content. Like my work wasn’t valid without it. Other, more popular writers were usually sexual in their content, and I wanted to be like them and bring in the views, right? So, when I look at my back catalog of works, I can see how my content moved from completely non-sexual to featuring sexual content over time, and the views usually came with. In this way, I was in an environment that was encouraging me on many levels to sexualise my own work, which impacted the way I thought about my creative process.

Here’s another example I remember. When I was a young sprout, I remember reading down someone’s list of fanfiction recommendations and seeing a work called Hug Therapy, which I promptly read. While the work is marked as explicit and containing the Loki/Thor pairing, the use of relationship and rating tags on AO3 is so poorly regulated that it didn’t really mean anything to me to see either of those. People tag hardcore material as non-explicit and tag friendships as relationships, because there’s no motivation to tag properly. Plus, someone I followed here on Tumblr had recommended it to me.

Now, you wouldn’t know from the listing, but while this piece starts out as comedy, it turns out in the end to include rape, incest, and BDSM in very explicit terms. The fact it was tagged as being explicit didn’t slow me down, because the liberal use of these tags could mean that an explicit tag was just there because sexual content was implied or mentioned, which I thought would be the case based on the rest of the listing. Out of curiosity, I recently tried to report this work to the moderators for containing no warnings about incest or rape, and I got this in response:

“Selecting “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings” satisfies a creator’s obligation under the warnings policy. Users who wish to avoid specific elements entirely should not access fanworks marked with “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings”. Our Terms of Service note: “You understand that using the Archive may expose you to material that is offensive, triggering, erroneous, sexually explicit, indecent, blasphemous, objectionable, grammatically incorrect, or badly spelled. ….. This decision is in accordance with our policy of maximum inclusiveness; we have therefore closed this case and will not be investigating further.”

Which, yeah, I guess. The frustration comes from how ‘Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings’ is an extremely commonly used tag, and most things that it’s used on are totally harmless.

This fanfiction, which I was recommended by a friend, is hugely popular, in the top 60 most read fanfictions in the entire fandom. You wanna hear the kicker? The author, Astolat, is one of the founders of AO3. They’re not just some random author who isn’t following the rules. They’re a creator of the whole website, and they made the rules. This is pretty telling about how seriously the website actually takes protecting their users.

My final example I want to give is one of fetish content. People in fetish communities generally (not always) say that fetishes are probably something one should work up to after the onset of sexual activity, especially potentially harmful stuff like BDSM. In the circles I was running in, if you weren’t sporting a fetish or two (no matter your age) you were a boring bitch.

Maybe this isn’t true of everywhere in the fanfiction community, but I used to feel that bizarre pressure until I got out. Bear in mind that my main time in this community was from ages 14 to 17. I never made my age a secret, either. I told people outright I was that age, I was in high school, I was playing hockey and studying The Great Gatsby when I wasn’t online.

Since I was in the Avengers fandom and I liked Loki and the Asgardians, I was frequently exposed to incestuous content between Loki and Thor, and a lot of it came out of nowhere or was poorly tagged. This was considered the norm, and while I at first felt completely horrified and repulsed, within a year or two I no longer gave a shit. It’s only in the last few years as I’ve begun to unpack everything that I’ve started to get that strong revulsion reaction to incestuous content.

In the circles I was in, it was relentlessly normal. Normal to the point that people who disliked it were usually shouted down. Even to this day, debate rages on in fandom spaces about whether or not content like this normalises this kind of abuse. In my own personal experience, which I don’t usually like to talk about, it absolutely does.

In real life, this normalisation started to have serious consequences for my mental health and interpersonal relationships. In fanfiction, any occasion when you are alone with someone could become sexual, any familial relationship is possibly sexual, and it doesn’t matter if you like it or not. I became incredibly anxious around male family members for fear of being sexually assaulted, and my OCD, which I had been developing since I was a child, turned from thoughts of physical violence to thoughts of graphically sexually assaulted by anyone and everyone around me.

My fear of being touched got to the point where I would have panic attacks if anyone came anywhere close to touching me. I quit sports, fucked up my romantic relationships, and didn’t hug anyone, not even members of my family, for years. All the while, I had bought my first laptop and was consuming more fanfiction than ever before. I struggled with my sexuality growing up, as I am bisexual, and while fanfiction provided LGBT content to help me, the content was frequently so disturbing that I viewed any expression of sexuality as something evil and predatory.

The community on AO3, whether you like it or not, is often sexual, and provides no barriers between the casual user looking for content and extremely intense fetish material. It’s sometimes called the Pornhub of fanfiction, but considering the wide range of people who use it, it’s more like if you opened Youtube and saw niche hardcore fetish videos just on the front page, recommended and trending.

Sure, you have to click a little button to confirm you’re 18 before you can actually read a story, but the tags and descriptions of readily available works can be extremely explicit. Fanfiction also brings you into close contact with fellow readers and the author, and encourages you to become a content creator, which in some ways makes it more dangerous.

I was affected much more strongly by what I saw than most people would be, because I was already treading shaky ground. But I’m also not the only person out there who has been hurt in this way. Most of my friends who grew up in fandom can report the impact that fanfiction culture had on them. One of my friends from high school knew a panoply of porn terms at age 14 or so due to reading fanfiction, and another of my other friends at high school almost exclusively read rape porn because it was her favourite. I didn’t have friends who watched porn; I had friends who read fanfiction. These are just as troubling to me as any other accounts of young people consuming visual porn from a very early age.

It’s frequently cited that fanfiction gives minority groups the opportunity for creative outlet. It was a great place for me to cut my teeth as a content creator, and a source of acceptance and kindness when times were tough. Fanfiction communities have historically been the domain of women and minorities, and create a space for these people to tell their own stories.

It’s largely because of this that fanfiction communities fear censorship and strict moderation, as they have been attacked in the past on homophobic or misogynistic grounds, resulting in mass deletions of works or the shutdown of websites. But there must be some middle ground between total censorship and the kind of free rein that puts vulnerable people in danger, and I strongly encourage the board of AO3 to seek this middle ground out.

But it’s the community itself that needs to shape up; AO3 is, after all, a community-led website built by fans for fans, so the fact that this website has such issues is a reflection of the issues that run deeply within the people who created it. Aku didn’t talk to me with the intention of doing me harm, or so I believe at this time, and she didn’t pursue me as a lone wolf or in isolation.

She was simply a particularly brazen member of a community that was used to having inappropriate conversations with young people and sexualising everything they did. Even people my own age were jokingly pushing me into discussing and consuming extremely sexual content. It was just normal. That’s what I want to say here. Inside the world of fandom on AO3, the grooming of children with sexual content is normal. And that’s scary.

- Mod Daft