#where some random person just scrolling through the notes of a popular post snapped at me and started making posts like they were reading
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girl help my tag rant got cut off short
please know that it was almost finished anyway but i had a few more potshots to take at my 4th-grade teacher who loved to use "you should know better" at the drop of a hat whether the children in her care actually knew better or not, for i will bash her "teaching" at the drop of a hat
A kind person whose social justice vocabulary is outdated or inadequate for the concepts they’re trying to communicate is a better person than anyone who’d rip them down as a bigot for not keeping up with the euphemism treadmill. Morality is measured by how you treat people, not how well you’ve memorized a continuously evolving set of shibboleths.
#person who uses incorrect vocab out of unwilling ignorance but is supportive and willing to learn >>>>> people who shit on them & mock them#for the crime of Not Having Been Told This Stuff Yet#like. ok#i try to be aware of my biases#for example: i am more aware of aphobia when i see it than i am of racism when i see it#i am aroace. i am also the pastiest white person i have ever seen#and there is an interaction that will always live in my head#where some random person just scrolling through the notes of a popular post snapped at me and started making posts like they were reading#through my blog and laughing at how 'its a white girl of fucking course'#(note: this happened before i realized i was cisn't)#in retrospect. yeah! the reblog i made that they were upset about was honestly...kinda racist! i may not have intended for it to be but uhh#it was#anyway none of their mocking actually. yknow. told me what i'd done wrong#i only realized 'oh...wait...i may have been thinking of a white person i know but my first thoughts aren't everybody's' years later#and every time i see someone trip up in that same way about something that I'M a part of#queerphobia or ableism (mental illness edition) or the like#i can't stop myself from thinking 'is this malicious? or are they like i was and still am? unaware but trying to do the right thing?'#this is also fresh in my head again from dealing with that one anon who got on my case for my flashing header#but. yeah. i'd rather be told where i fuck up instead of just mocked for it without explanation#and no 'you should know better' doesn't count as an explanation unto itself#that just makes me mentally lump you in with the 4th-grade teacher who told 8th-grade me that mickey mouse clubhouse was age-appropriate#for me at that specific age and was condescending about it the whole time#bc guess what she would say whenever i said 'gosh' or 'darn' or 'dang' or 'geez'#or when i asked what the word 'penis' was in 4th grade & legitimately didnt know why she was dragging me to the back of the room by my ear#sometimes...people who don't know things...aren't in the wrong for not knowing them#now IF THEY'VE BEEN TOLD THINGS AND HAVE REFUSED TO CHANGE IN SPITE OF THAT#THAT'S a whole different story#but ignorance does not mean malice by default#for further evidence as to why punishment without explanation doesnt work out in the long run:#4th grade teacher once said 'NO BUTS' and i was too terrified to ask if she meant 'buts' or 'butts'
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