#what happened in dc
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Dick, holding Wally’s hand while they lie in bed: God I love this bed. God I love this house. And you. Especially you.
Voice: How domestic.
Wally: God?
Damian in his Robin suit, holding his bleeding side: No. It’s me. May one of you please direct me to the nearest medical kit.
[Frantic scrambling]
#Dick fixing Damian up gently: what happened? will you be okay? sleep here tonight we’ll get a room ready#Damian: tt I do not need your worry#I am perfectly capable of handling this on my own#Dick: that’s too bad baby bird because I’m gonna worry and I’m gonna help you anyway#batman#dc comics#batfam#batfamily#robin#nightwing#damian wayne#dick grayson#wally west#birdflash#incorrect quotes#mine
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Sleepy King
The Justice League Dark caught wind of a cult trying to summon the Ghost King. A being with power so terrible and great, that all of the chaotic Infinite Realms feared him. A true tyrant. Long ago it took the effort of ghosts equal to gods to seal him away into a permeant slumber.
And now this cult wishes to wake him and bring him to the living realm. It was a race against the clock to find the ritual site and all members were called on board, magic or not. Even Constantine looked stressed.
They did find the site.
But it was too late, the ritual was completed. The entire inner circle of runes glowed before being swallowed in a column of green light. The air filled with static and a ringing that made Supergirl crumble to the ground.
The light dissipated, but there was no great figure or being of pure evil. Instead there was a boy, a teenager. He laid on the ground curled up in his sleep. He was a ghost no doubt, dressed in regal clothing.
Despite this when he stirred, everyone froze. It seemed the cold hard ground woke him up. He got up slowly and yawned, revealing his sharp fangs. Once sat up he opened his bleary eyes to look around. He looked confused and tired, really tired.
"Where am I?" He mumbled. "I was trying to get some sleep." Constantine internally screaming, latches onto that last sentence. He glances over to Batman. He caught that last part too. Batman approaches calmly and crouches down in front of the boy king. Hardening his resolve, Batman takes on a gentle tone.
"Hey kiddo, sorry we woke you. Lets get you back to bed yeah?" The boy nodded in agreement. He pulled himself to his feet before looking around in a circle. "Where did my blanket go?" He asked rather sadly. Batman is quick to shed his own cape and drape it over him. "You can borrow my cape until we get you a new one." He nodded again, pulling the black fabric around himself.
John quickly summoned a portal door, while Batman led the King through it. John threw looks around at everyone. Everyone could tell he was mouthing the words. 'Find me a fucking blanket now'
Running on the logic of getting the king away from Earth, away from graves and the undead, that could give him power. The portal led to the Watch Tower.
Batman took advantage of the King's bleary state to send a base wide alert for all noncritical members to evacuate immediately. With a priority that death adjacent members leave first. "The stars are pretty." Bruce looked at the boy staring out the window in wonder. He almost looked like a normal kid, almost.
"Yeah they are, it's pretty late so we should get you back to bed." He nodded, going along with Batman's gentle coaxing.
He takes the boy to an unused bedroom. Making sure the room isn't dusty and that lights are dimmed. He glances back to see about a dozen different leaguers all holding blankets, one thought to bring extra pillows. The bed was pretty barren with only a single pillow and a thin bedsheet. So Bruce took a thick duvet, one of the fluffier blankets and a second pillow from his team before shooing them away.
The boy ended up keeping his cape, mumbling how it was warm. He tucked the boy in, before quietly exiting the room and turning off the light. He was pretty sure the King fell back to sleep before he even reached the light switch.
After the door shut, he made direct eye contact with John. "Constantine." They needed to figure out what the hell was going on.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#dp x dc#dc x dp#sleep deprived danny#All the heroes with super speed were circling the world to find the site and Supergirl found it first.#Danny assumed Pariah's title so when Pariah gets summon he ends up answering#He gets a new outfit for it too#Danny doesn't know either of those things though#He's too tired to question anything though#JLD has no idea what's happening and John is scrambling to find out#There are a bunch of theories being around#Batman is battling his urge to adopt#That's an immortal and all powerful undead ruler Bruce!
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tim: mr red hood, i know you’re about to kill me, but can you just proof read my essay on macbeth before you mutilate my body with bullet holes?
jason: kid, do i look like someone who did well in school?
tim: …
jason, 4.0 gpa teachers pet, whose built like a tank and looks like an escaped convict: shut up, don’t answer that, and hand me your shitty essay
#dc#robin#tim drake#red robin#jason todd#red hood#titans#titans 29#i read of crime lords and literature if you couldn’t tell and this is basically what happens
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Cryptid!Alfred, who is actually immortal. Like, he cannot die for forever - he did once, during the war, and after that... for some reason, he kept coming back, completely without any additional magical help. He sometimes dies again, and then mysteriously comes back on the next morning, as if nothing happened. Bruce used to it at some point, so instead of asking questions (Alfred has no answers, anyway) he just pretends that it is normal. He gaslights kids to think the same. Like, what do you mean he died, Damian? No, he is alrightish. Look in the kitchen, he is making us breakfast. It probably was just a bad dream.
So, when Jason dies and gets back? Oh, Alfred knows his grandson has the same curse/blessing. Because it wasn't the Lazarus Pit that brought Jason back after all, but some strange, unexplainable force. Perhaps, both of them are just bound to end up as guardians, as warriors and protectors - that's why they keep coming back.
...Nevertheless, it doesn't make their family less... anxious about the whole thing. These two from the other side? Oh, they absolutely enjoy their immortal hang-out hours.
Jason: What was your funniest death?
Alfred: I am going to say... that one time, when I was teaching young master Bruce using a hunting rifle, and he accidentally shot me. I came back in fifteen minutes, and, of course, a poor thing was sobbing, but afterwards he was doing all chores for a month. Wonderful days.
Jason: Damn, poor Brucie... My funniest gotta be that one time, when Roy and I got drunk, and I legit jumped off the building because I thought I can fly. Roy had never got sober that quick.
(The first time Jason dies on the family's watch)
Dick, sobbing: Alfred... Alfred... He died! His neck was snapped! How can I live-
Alfred, casually leaning to snap Jason's neck again: Wake up, my boy.
Jason, dramatically gasping for air: Damn, who made me a massage, while I was sleeping?
Tim: What. The. Fuck.
#little Dick was living in the strange horror when he was little#like wdym our butler respawns I literally saw him dying on the FOOTAGE#after moving out he gaslights himself to believe that it had never happened.#he starts ignoring all strange instances as Bruce after that#then Jason joins A's club. and Dick feels like he is a side char in horror again WHAT THE FUCK#Tim has a record of their deaths and just uses it as a project#Damian doesn't understand the hype. isn't it normal for families? his own do that all the time#(secretly thinks it is cool that A & J doesn't need the Lazarus Pit for that)#Bruce pretends to be nonchalant but he is in the verge of tears every time Alfred and Jason die again#also don't write me about the super punch that somehow brought Jason back alive I assure you it was Gotham (the city) bringing him back /hj#jason todd#red hood#dcu comics#dc universe#dcu#batman#bruce wayne#batfamily#batfam#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#tim drake
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been thinking about jason being petty towards bruce. like, oh, you spend time with your other kids, but not me? tire privileges revoked! it would be over stupid shit too.
like there’s one time bruce decides to take damien to the movies, and jason is just beside himself.
like the conversation would be like:
JASON: So, let me get this straight—you took Damian to a movie.
BRUCE: He asked.
JASON: Oh, and I wouldn’t have wanted to see Kung Fu Panda 4 with you?!
BRUCE: You were busy.
JASON: Busy taking down a cartel. Which, by the way, I learned from you. I deserve quality time!
BRUCE: Jason—
JASON: No. No excuses. You’ll learn.
Jason storms off. Five minutes later, an alert pops up on the Batcomputer.
BATCOMPUTER: Warning: Batmobile rear tires have been removed.
BRUCE: …Jason.
Cut to Jason outside, rolling two Batmobile tires away, cackling.
#this isn’t the last time jason steals the tires#bruce keeps doing stuff with the other batkids#and Jason is like look at this opportunity#like imagining if tim gets arrested for something bc i mean come on tims a menace#then bruce just bails tim out and just the week before jason was arrested and bruce let him sit in jail for like two days#jason blew up something so like bad jason#either way jason is like i warned you batbitch and he steals the tires from the batmobile again and then who knows what happens to the tires#unfortunately it gets worse#bc bruce then takes dick to a fancy ass dinner#and it’s to one of Jason’s favorite stakehouses#Like it was the only fancy food place he could stand#good steak is good steak#and jason’s like this is crossing a line#so instead of stealing the tires again#he just takes the entire batmobile#how? no one knows#no one sees the batmobile again or the tires#at least until Batman gets a call from various members of the JL asking him why pieces of the batmobile have been popping up in the city#however it’s about the car itself#no one knows where the tires are still#jason calling Oliver up and saying like i don’t like you man but like we both don’t like batman want his tires?#jason todd#bruce wayne#dick grayson#tim drake#dc universe#batman#batfamily#batfam#damian wayne
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need more fics where Jason is told by one of the batfam that they're "Happy he's alive" and he either stares blankly at them or his eyes well with tears he can't control and before he can stop himself he's like "What?" and it sounds like a whisper, like he's positive he misheard. and the family member repeats themselves, feeling suddenly like they've stepped onto a landmine. and then-
"no one's said that to me. since i've been back." and Jason doesn't mean to say it, but he hadn't really realized it himself until that moment and it feels like his chest is cracking open where he stands, and his eyelashes feel clumpy, and his throat has a stone pushing up against his vocal chords.
Some subconscious part of him has always felt it-- has been aware he's never been told directly that anyone is happy he's alive and back... but now it's out there in the world, and he realizes he's been waiting on it for years. He's been waiting to be told that someone is happy he's alive. He wonders, briefly, if those words might have fixed everything in the early days. If he had just felt like Bruce wanted him back, if he had just felt that Bruce didn't see him as some cosmic mistake wearing the face of his dead son... would it have changed anything? He doesn't know. doesn't know if he wants to know.
because it didn't happen. the words were never said.
until now.
"no one?" the family member asks in dawning horror.
and the silence that follows is deafening.
#bonus points if this happens in front of multiple members of the family#and they all realize how bad they fucked up#like no wonder Jason says he's not part of the family#what have they done#Jason todd#batfam#angst#fic idea#dc comics#batfamily#dick grayson#Tim drake#Damian wayne#Stephanie brown#alfred pennyworth#Bruce wayne
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This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.
"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.
"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.
I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.
#I didn't watch Teen Wolf but I know this happened to that Stiles character#I'm not active in any DC fandom but it looks like this happened to Tim Drake and to a lesser extent Dick and Jason#In prequels-era Star Wars it seems to be Obi-Wan; he's the spark/focus of this post here; bring back his flaws I like that he kind of sucks#sometimes a Fandom's Darling comes out of an Author's Darling! usually Fandom's are vessels to fuck the “hottest guy” available though#I will probably turn reblogs off if this spreads too far because I really don't care if people write Mary Sue fanfic; can't cast that stone#squinting at every “intersex” tag like Inigo Montoya: “I don't think that means what you think it means.”#honestly the fantasy intersex thing is a separate & more serious post; but the fandom usage is a red/yellow flag for me when searching#tossawary fandom#fandom's darling
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DPxDC Idea
Danny working at Wayne Enterprises as some sort of engineer, uses the in-house app for all his blueprints and stuff
He starts getting notes from a coworker in-app, and assumes its this annoying older guy in his department who constantly undermines him because of his age, despite his education and past achievements (i feel like in this AU the Fentons react well to the reveal and they work together on a number of non-lethal ecto inventions that have Danny's name attached to them)
Except one day his coworker mentions never using the app, and Danny suddenly realizes there's only one other TD he could've been arguing with in the notes of the app
#dp x dc prompt#dpxdc#danny phantom#danny fenton#batman#tim drake#red robin#i have no ideas what happens beyond danny realizing it's been tim the whole time#and having a 'fuck ive been arguing with the big boss' moment#cause of course when he thinks its some asshole from his own department hes snarky as hell#but the ceo??#should he stop with the sarcastic explanations behind his designs?#or will tim think its weird if his tone changes#in my head this does end up being dead tired somehow#just because i love the idea of these two bonding over snarkiness and engineering#and i feel like tim would simultaneously love and hate danny's notes#but also is that actually in character? cause the only batman thing i've read is rhe webtoon#and i know some vague things about canon#but thats it#haven's writing
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Part 7! Next part with more of Bruce, Ollie, and more's reactions will be out soon!
Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next
#twitter au#btw I'm making it so Jasons about 25 in this au and Roy's about 28 and they had about 2 interactions before Jason's death/resurrection#dc batfam#jason todd#batfam#batfamily twitter au#dc#richard grayson#tim drake#stephanie brown#social media au#timothy drake#batfamily#roy harper#oliver queen#green arrow#speedy#ollie queen#batman#bruce wayne#duke thomas#cassandra cain#jayroy#what happens in vegas#bruollie
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tim and bruce have an odd relationship to the rest of the family. they don’t act like father and son but it seems like they have a “deeper” bond than the others
bruce seems to take tim’s advice more seriously, bruce actually takes a break if tim tells him, tim still gets benched but not nearly as much as he should, and most confusingly, tim benched bruce once. not alfred benching bruce, TIM.
normally bruce has to be forced to take a break, and normally by alfred, but if tim says “you’re benched for a week” bruce? listens?
they have no idea why. some of them ask dick if he knows since he was there but he’s just as confused
and then despite all that there’s also such a strain between them? it’s really on the line of a professional relationship and almost a care taker. it’s very confusing. and then the times bruce gives tim a present or anything like that and tim stops and stares at him for a second, like he’s dissecting bruce. no one is able to fully figure it. until bruce is de-aged to tim’s robin era.
tim is very adamant about most of them, but especially jason and damian, do not reveal their names to him. for the time being they have a strictly professional relationship with their father who doesn’t know them.
they finally get some of the picture when they see tim start acting as bruce’s caretaker. tim switches between being gentle “hey, you need to sleep” to screaming at bruce. it always works. tim knows exactly which version bruce needs and it scares the team cause that has to require some practice
they’re then also thrown for a loop when they hear bruce call out jason’s name in a shocked voice, which makes sense cause he doesn’t know jason is alive but jason still has his helmet on so what? and then they hear a voice none of them have heard. except dick goes pale and jason’s breath hitches. and suddenly tim is responding to jason’s name and acting weird, almost like what some of dicks stories described jason as. and it’s so fucked up when they’re watching time act like someone else and bruce going along with it
the dynamic they’re getting is also fucked up once again when, during one of bruce’s really bad days, tim straight up acts like bruce’s parent. and bruce reacts well.
they’re all horrified by this. the realization that tim and bruce’s relationship has so many layers and that they do act like father and son sometimes. except bruce isn’t the father and tim isn’t the son
#tim drake#batfamily#bruce wayne#damian wayne#jason todd#parentified tim drake#i think that’s the term#anyway#tim doing better with bruce like this than the bruce they have now#bruce gets hit with a gas and calls tim dad and tim goes with it like it’s not the first time it happened#bruce gets turned back to normal at some point and having to deal with everyone seeing how fucked his relationship with tim is#also. NOT BRUCE X TIM. THIS IS NOT BATCEST. IF I EVER POST BATCEST IVE BEEN REPLACED#anyway. jason seeing how bad bruce got after his death. realizing that tim didn’t actually want to replace him#dick seeing what he just ignored. realizing that oh shit i could’ve stopped this#dc stands for disregard canon#again not canon
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Occasionally I picture Nightwing calling Red Hood "little wing" in front of others and people looking between this huge, 6'0 feet tall man with growing white hair, and then Nightwing, a shorter man who has flawless skin, probably around his 20's, and a fit but not too buff build and they just- don't know what's happening. Is it some kind of inside joke they aren't aware of? Why is Nightwing acting as if he's years older than Red-fucking jacked-Hood?
Nightwing: Little wing, you actually were decent in that fight! I'm impressed.
Hero, who was helping during this fight as well, listening in to the conversation: little...?
Red Hood: Wow, feeling very appreciated right now. Got any other backhanded compliments in there?
Hero: Wait, excuse me-
Nightwing: As a matter of fact-
Red Hood: Nope! I'm outta here. Screw you!
Nightwing: You know you love me!
Red Hood: In your dreams, dickhead!
Nightwing: Hey! We don't use that-
Red Hood: Not listening!
Nightwing: Jeez, kids these days...
Red Hood: I'm an adult and fuck you too!
Nightwing: What? Thought you weren't-
Red Hood: See you never, I'm out.
Hero: ...
Hero: what the actual fuck?
#Dick Grayson is a big brother#and that means he gets to be an asshole sometimes#he lives up to his name#and this random hero is just having to witness these idiots bickering#and be very confused about it#when your brother looks older than you but you still call him cute nicknames#“that's a grown ass man”#Nightwing: and that grown ass man happens to be my little brother#Nightwing: deal with it#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#batfam#batfamily#probably ooc#but that's what happens when you want these two to have a decent relationship#sorry canon#dc comics#hc dick has a permanent 20 yo look#meanwhile jason looks like he's on his 30's#tbf he's had a pretty stressful life#and death doesn't do any favors#having that in mind don't ask how dick grayson still looks good#might be his secret superpower
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Ok but Bruce’s “batglare” except it has specific stages that mean you’re in varying degrees of trouble. Allow me to elaborate:
Level 1: isn’t even really considered a glare in Bruce-speak, more of a suspicious squinting
Level 2: standard Disappointed Dad look, the most you’re gonna get is a reprimand
Level 3: resting Bitch face. Less of a glare and more of a sharp look that WILL follow you around and creep you out
Level 4: worried batglare, features aren’t as sharp as with the standard batglare. Usually smooths out when his kids/teammates stop being idiots and putting themselves in danger
Level 5: standard batglare, regular criminals are usually at the end of it, most of the kids have gotten pretty used to it
Level 6: You’ve Fucked Up. Expect a screaming match or a lecture of at least 30 minutes. Also you’re grounded
Level 7: full batglare on steroids, makes grown men piss their pants, usually reserved for the joker. Most of the kids have received it only once and that was MORE than enough for them to never want to receive it again
Level 8: Alfred.
#I could go on but I think 8 is pretty standard#the batkids have a whole code surrounding The Bathglare#sometimes it’s even specific to a person#like if Jason has fucked smth up Bruce’s mouth twists in a certain way that just doesn’t happen with other glares#dick is so fluent in Bruce-speak he can tell exactly who fucked up and to what degree based just by looking at Bruce for 5 seconds#batman#dc comics#batfam#dcu#batfamily#dc robin#bruce wayne#jason todd#dick grayson#nightwing#red hood
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FUNNIEST fucking shit that comes with making Danny eleven years old when he had his accident in "late at night, when the nightingale sings" is the implication following, that everything that happened in the show did too. And I fully intend on (mostly) keeping it like that. There'll be some changes (of which I need to figure out) but for the most part??? Yeah relatively the same.
Like I FULLY intend on keeping Dark Danny occurring 6 months post accident. Do you know how fucking HILARIOUS that is??? That Dan got his ass kicked by a goddamn FIFTH-SIXTH GRADER?? I'd never show my face ever again. Homeboy spent the last ten years being a one-man mass extinction event, only to get his ass beat by a kid who hasn't even lost his last baby tooth. That's hysterical. I'm losing my mind just thinking about it.
AND PARIAH DARK TOO. Imagine being an eons old tyrant capable of dragging whole towns down into your dimension, and you get singehandedly shoved back into your coffin in less than 48 hours by a kid whose bedtime is still 8:30. You didn't even have the time to expand your army! You were still trying to take over the city the kid came from!
And he just!!! Shoves you back in!! Insane! This kid hasn't even been dead for a full year yet! He's still growing in his ghost fangs! And he just knocked you flat on your ass in an oversized mech suit. What the fuck! It's like looking down and seeing a four week old kitten meowing very indignantly at you and trying to bite your feet, except that kitten is also actually a black-footed cat and they have a 60% kill success rate, and oops! Now you're dead. You took too long laughing at the kitten trying to attack you that it clawed up your pant leg and ripped out your throat.
COULD I, realistically, span these episodes out over the course of 2.5 years prior to Danny's family dying?? Yes I could! Do I think it's hilarious (and horribly traumatizing, which makes it twice as fun) to shove all of this into the span of (roughly) a year instead?? Yes. Because the show has such a skewed timeline that I've always just assumed that at the end of the show, Danny was starting his sophomore year in high school. So fuck it, lets go for it!
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#blood blossom au#my fic#danny fenton#danny phantom#if i REALLY want to get into it i'll have to look at the show's episode synopsis and pick and choose which episodes happen when in the year#maybe pull a scarlet lady and have some of the season 1 episodes happen further down the line instead. but i can do that later. for now#come laugh with me at the mental image of teeny 11 year old danny curbstomping ghosts twice is size and thrice his weight.#bruce is watching old footage from the phantom fights in amity and going 'HNN' in increasing concern. he's got his hands folded and his#chin in his hands and he's going (ಠ_ಠ) with his face and he has SO many questions and concerns. for many. many different reasons#first of all he's incredibly upset that danny had to go through this at all in the first place. like no kid should've gone thru this alone#but he. is also. very very softly. going *'what the fuck...'*
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Today I am thinking about Jason, who is fresh out of his coffin, catatonic and non-verbal. His mind is in a haze and in a constant terror most of the time, and when it isn't - when he manages to ground himself, to stop imagining Joker's laughter and the phantom screech of the crowbar - he can't bring himself to speak, because there is... smoke in his lungs. A fucking soot. Rare sounds and words that escape his mouth sound like a painful, inhuman shriek.
He vividly remembers screaming his lungs out in the coffin, though, as he woke up to realise that he was buried six feet under, locked away from the rest of the world. So, maybe it was the last drop - a last attempt to use his voice.
His next tries are too painful. And when his desperate cry for Bruce - for someone to call his dad - is getting ignored, pushed aside, Jason doesn't even want to try any more. What use it would be? No one listens to him anyway.
He is as good as dead.
Oh.
He is dead.
#it takes months after the Pit to make Jason actually speak on the full-time#firstly because he is unused to speaking at that time#but also because he is afraid (of both feeling the soot again and of getting ignored)#Jason who gets non-verbal every time when he is triggered#he is always so vocal so loud about what he feels#and then his argument w Bruce once gets too much and he is triggered and his voice is just... gone#at first others think that he is playing a silent treatment game#but he is not#“how long it will take others to notice that i am not speaking?” quote but Jason physically can't bring himself to speak like this#...it is up to you if batarang incident still happens in this one btw#jason todd#red hood#dcu comics#dc universe#dcu#batman
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Red Robin!Tim: Can’t stop shaking.
Red Hood!Jason: Probably Parkinson’s.
Tim: Not helping.
Jason: Wasn’t trying to.
[Freeze frame]
Narrator: The shaking was in fact caused by the 15 red bulls Tim had decided to consume before patrol. He promptly proceeded to declare he “had a meeting with the lord” before steeling Red Hoods motorbike and high tailing it outa there. He was found on a random farm in North Carolina the next day with no recollection of what happened.
#Tim knows what happened but for the sake of everybody else he pretends not to#dc comics#dc#batfam#batfamily#batman#tim drake#red robin#jason todd#red hood#incorrect quotes#mine
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Bernard: i lied. i don’t like sex. put your clothes back on babe and watch my power point presentation about What The Fuck Is Going On Between Batman And Twoface
Tim: …
#timbern#heartbreaking your boyfriend tricked you with the promise of sex now he’s giving a Presentation about your dad and his ex#timber#bernard dowd#tim drake#robin#red robin#Tim in complete and utter disbelief: :O#this happenes routinely#Bernard: and this is my presentation on WTF Is Going On With Batman And Green Lantern#Bernard: also Wonder Woman Superman and-#Bernard: and that’s the end of my tedtalk#Tim: :\#Bernard: what did you think? :)#Tim: it was… so great babe.. very detailed… you must’ve done a lot of research :)#Tim and Bernard making out: *bernard reach’s over and pulls a sheet off of his bedside table revealing a projector*#Tim in his mind: NOOOOO NOT AGAIN NOOOOOO | Tim on the outside :)#robin iii#incorrect quotes#kinda#batman#dc#detective comics
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