#well the time when this panel happened
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THE OBVIOUS STALEMATE BREAKER, IT'S WHAT THE PEOPLE DESERVE
#doctor doom#shitpost#remember that time doom took over the UN#and the US#which time?#well the time when this panel happened#and then doom and namor had went out to dinner#only doom was like this restaurant sucks and left#bye
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Crazy issues that come up when a character is written a little too well
#yay story time comic nobody asked for#funnily enough i will NEVER play undertale on the computer because of this#my first exposure to undertale was jacksepticeye and i am glad i didn't opt to play the game myself at the time#flowey closing the game and then the broken start up cutscene was bad enough just WATCHING it#and i STILL have to watch that chara thing at the end with a far distance from my screen and the volume down#not because of the scary face but because of the violin noise that sounds like its a repeating tone rather than a loop#and then of course the window hopping around#am also very glad i was spoiled about the spamton mercy win before i tried it myself#am slightly worried about future deltarune chapters but at least now i'm anticipating it#anyway remember when i tagged that one post ''i'm scared of computers and it's a monkey's fault''#now you know :3#i really wanted this done on thursday#and apparently dawn's brain says friday doesn't happen until after i fall asleep#so now i am awake and it is 4:30 and i hear birds chirping so nighty night#((or good morning))#yay comic :D i was right this did help a lot with getting some program familiarity#it's not the greatest paneling in the world but it's good for now#idk if i should really tag him or not#but uh#spamton#deltarune#spamton enjoyers i am so sorry#i am terrified of him only because he does his job in the story very well
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offering three cookies 🍪🍪🍪
(<< part 1)
#kirby just whipping out the big guns right away. let's go on the ~warp star~! he knew this would get her instantly#i think also it's impossible to be sad when you are being cuddled by kirby tbh. bandee too!! what a cute prompt!#i thought i'd combine several of these sorts of asks and comments into one! sorry for not drawing adeleine; another time!#i just thought this worked well as a happy ending here. everything is fine!! they're all good now!! happy tappies and all!! hooray!#and nothing weird or bad happened here at all!! just a little breakdown but it's in the past!! phew. yay! <3#tried something fun with the layouts for this to be half interactive/asks and half comic panels? i think it worked!#not sure this REALLY answers many questions but... i did this for fun when i was supposed to be doing other things!! i hope you'll enjoy!#also i LOVED ALL THESE ASKS i hope this doesn't make anyone feel bad for sending them in. this is just for dramatic effect!!!!#also ALSO this took longer than expect so i'll do those other ask responses tomorrow. thank you for all the well wishes everybody! <3#starstruck dee#bandana waddle dee#kirby#my art#my comics
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Finding Home Leo and @separatedleoau One are getting along great :D
(there will be blood shed)
happy halloween!!
#finding home au#putting them in situations is my favorite past time#seperated council#can i put that? imma put that#this is the best one expression i've ever drawn lol#referring to the last panel#this is what happens when Gali isnt around to supervise FH /hj#also i cant explain how happy i am to share FH shell scar things :D#Splinter is going to be so mentally well when he sees them ^-^#(he absolutely will not)#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt leo#rise leo#rise leonardo#rottmnt leo#rottmnt leonardo
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hiiii this is boobs + thights anon and ive got a couple of questions:
what is your favorite version of erik's boobs + thights? movie/comic/92/97
and do you like charles's boobs + thights? if so what's your favorite version?
i love your art very much ive been thinking about mini skirt charles for all day thank you
hello my friend i love answering A Couple Of Questions
favorite iteration of erik And His Boobs And Thighs uhhhhhhhhhhhh comicverse, specifically this cover by My Icon stefano caselli for Resurrection of Magneto #2
i love it so much i bought the variant issue specifically for it 🤤 anytime caselli draws erik in general .... i need to be taken to the hospital ...
as for charles he isnt as meaty as erik but thats ok i still love him .... any attempt i made to get a screen cap of his green combat outfit from tas has resulted in three pixels so im forced to ask all of you to imagine i put that here. i think he looks Very Nice in that outfit :^)
#snap chats#whats so funny about this ask is that it reminded me of some of my fave erik panels from Inferno and i was like#'yeah who was the artist for that their magneto was gorg...' chat imagine my Not Surprise surprise when caselli also worked on that#hes just so handsome in his style it makes me want to throw up and cry and bite erik#whats so funny bout this erik outfit is that hes usually bald .. lmao ... still handsome but i do love his hair like this...#this is more of a Favorite Outfit post aint it. LMAO#With That In Mind As I Said With Charles Tho he's never really been meaty. or as meaty as erik AND THATS OK#he doesnt have to be for me to be Not Normal about him.... like when he has that combat uniform 😩#it my fave shade of green But Chat the rolled up sleeves and the gloves and black tshirt .... i fear im unwell ...#he is wider in 92- a lil less so in 97 but this does not negate the fact im obsessed#ALSO RUDE THAT I CANT GET ANY REALLY NICE SHOTS OF IT IN 97#i mean i probably can but ive spent more time trying to than i should have I HAVE THINGS TO DO TODAY#like eat. this entire time my stomachs been rumbling and its been annoying so im gonna go eat finally#the days slipped from me what happened ..... it was just 11AM .......#oh well no time to ruminate on that. lunch time :]#THEEEN hopefully i really oughta get some work done..
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On the subject of gotham county line and batman noel and so on and so forth it’s pretty frustrating (from a watsonian pov) that anytime Bruce hallucinates Jason being loving/ caring/helpful/compassionate towards him it’s always as robin and never as his current self
#it's ironic because Jason as robin never got the chance to become as obedient & devoted (malleable) to Bruce as he currently is#which is a result of being abused/manipulated for a more prolonged period of time#“maybe if I try harder and do it right this time he'll finally see the truth”#classic abuse tactic#no matter how well the victim fits the mold set by the abuser they’ll never acknowledge it#rather if they see you trying they’ll push harder and tell you you’re not perfect#the small shreds of affection here and there are important for motivating the victim to keep trying#kelseethe#Jason initiating the hug in rhato 27 after Bruce insinuated that those beatings will be a regular occurence bc he deems it a necessity#continuing to support Bruce even after Ethiopia and sticking around to help get Damian back#eagerly cooperating with Bruce + co in event leviathan then getting surprise pikachu faced/hurt after being betrayed#making a conscious decision to comfort Bruce in gotham war after Bruce fucked him up and left him behind#having undying conern for Bruce's wellbeing while Bruce regularly endangers his life#ex. Bruce's weird habit of committing vehicular assault on Jason whenever they're on the road demonstrated both in tfz and gotham war#point being: Jason was much more psychologically fit to be defiant towards Bruce when he was robin compared to now#he's more of a “good son”™ now than he was as robin Bruce is just too used to thinking whatever he wants and never being satisfied#the only times Jason got mad/upset at Bruce during one issue and continued to stay mad until the next#other than lost days and utrh was batman 410-411 and early in aditf before Bruce helps Jason find Sheila#so much worse has happened since then and all that just magically became water under the bridge off-panel
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Aqukana are so sweet nothing coded and HSJFKFKIFJF IN THIS ESSAY I WILL-
Ok so Kana loves Aqua as he is and really does not want anything in return from Aqua, she doesn't put him in a pedestal or idolizes him intensely. To her he's an idiot and an idiot that she has a crush on. She banters w him, calls him a gloomy narcissist, and asks him to tell her jokes. To Aqua, Kana is that window to normalcy that he has, he's just a teenager w her and he doesn't have to act or walk in eggshells w her. He shines a light on her darkest moments and she is his light. They can be who they are with each other, Kana doesn't have to hold her tongue, Aqua doesn't have to act around her. In fact when Aqua is asked by Kana if he hates her he answers "It's actually the opposite.." like sir who are you fooling🤨🤨
Edit:
Adding smth to this, Kana comes home to Aqua's sweet nothings. Aka Aqua would never demand perfection from Kana. Kana doesn't have to pressure herself to reach Aqua's expectations, she's perfect as she is.
#aqkn#aqukana#aquakana#onk#Spotify#i want to talk abt these two and I WILL#i can see why Aqua is so protective of Kana when she represents that one good thing that happened him and he doesn't want to lose that#well not “one” but Kana seems to be the only girl in the series that's not putting Aqua into some sort of pedestal#she wants her crush to notice her perfectly teen behavior#but she also sees her as just more than a romantic interest#she sees him as a precious friend#he's probably the first friend she's got in years of the industry#not only in one of the panels in the latest arc Kana is seen in Elementary school holding a script alone and not playing w the other kids#so it's safe to assume he's her first friend in a long time#and after losing him once I don't think she'll risk losing the friendship she got back WHICH IS SODJBDJDNDJD#GIVE ME THE FRIENDS TO LOVERS AKA#GIVE ME THE BANTER#THE TENSION#GIVE IT#oshi no ko#oshi no ko manga#oshi no ko manga spoilers
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“The Moon Warrior,” Marvel 85th Anniversary Special (Vol. 1/2024), #1.
Writer and artist: Yuji Kaku; Special thanks to Ken Kunito
#Marvel#Marvel comics#Marvel 85th Anniversary Special#Moon Knight comics#Tsukikage#I can’t believe my inability to read Kanji is haunting me even in Moon Knight comics (not even the first time that’s happened on this blog!#you know and maybe this is just my personal academic/professional background talking#but I find the personal reasonings people come to on why they’re against either totalitarian regimes or extremist ideologies#to be of endless interest#because obviously it’s critical that people come to understand how it’s immoral and consequently detestable#for a government or some other individual/s who hold/s power to abuse their authority and not respect people#based on the latter’s inherit worth as a human being#but when it comes to people actually living under such institutions…opinions can be diverse#sometimes tyrannical regimes get toppled not (only) because they’re being punished for their human rights violations#but also because they transgressed against something else#(like the elite or the military or in this case their citizen’s sense of honor)#it’s imperfect but in this world full of imperfect people it would be truly miraculous to execute a morally perfect revolution#not to make excuses#just making an observation based on what I’ve studied#but anyway here we are again with a Moon Knight unable to die well trying to atone for the crimes of the master he used to serve#(and the ones he committed during his service)#and all this to say#gosh I love that first panel on the last page#VERY much Kaku sensei’s style
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Im not a Bruce fan stop making me defend him tim and dick both would’ve felt terrible about killing somebody and scenes written to make them look cool that are never spoken about in depth again don’t change that yes this is about that council of spiders shit bro
#Im so tired of the stupid ‘tim doesn’t kill? then why blow up bases?’#what did blowing up those bases do to him? like if there’s no meaningful convo on this shift in characterization it really didn’t mean shit#sorry idc#It’s like those ‘how is Bruce calling Jason wrong when he only kills pedophiles’ and that’s never been said in a comic#well not exactly like that adjacent#the audience is putting more weight onto certain actions than the story does#and while this IS valid sometimes bc writers ignore shit all the time#and there’s always biases to account for#saying ‘it didn’t/did happen’ or using one panel as a gotcha in a larger convo is sooooo#like no Im not changing my mind about that moment not counting for shit#Bc it genuinely did not count for shit#it made a lasting impact on you and urs and nobody else#u and urs being white tim Drake fans who’s fave tag is tim Drake needs a hug
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I am so utterly fascinated by “Saki”, the 18-year-running mahjong manga in which you, the reader, become gradually, frog-boilingly aware (over the course of nearly two decades’ worth of mahjong tournaments) that none of these girls are wearing underwear and most of their boobs are slowly expanding.
I need you to understand that I have, like, an anthropological level fascination with this comic. From the perspective of someone who is also a comic artist and writer, two things delight me about it:
the fact that I understand completely how an artist gets from “the fans can have a little hint of skirted asscheek” to “the pussy is completely out on center page” over the course of 18 years; and
the way in which the pussy being out is treated by the characters and diegesis as being utterly unremarkable.
Okay. Point 1. The frog-boiling.
Let me put this in perspective for you. There was already a meme about how the characters in “Saki” don’t wear underwear when I was in middle school. I am thirty now. Okay? And it’s still going.
In the time since, this has stopped being a joke. It is now indisputable canon. This is not because anyone outright says it at any point. It’s because the underwear ran out of places to hide. I’m obsessed with this thought: somewhere in the over 20 volumes of “Saki”, there is a panel in which underwear was objectively deconfirmed. And it would be so hard to figure out where that panel actually is. Maybe the artist didn’t even realize it when she drew it! The frog? Boiling!!
And of course there is also the breast expansion. I don’t know how to put a spin on this. They are just expanding. Like, this happens a lot with artists: you define a character as being, in your mind, “the one with the big boobs”, and over the years you emphasize that trait further and further so that the signal doesn’t get lost in the noise. It’s just that normally—in like a wildly popular manga series about mahjong published by literally Square Enix, for example—normally there would be a point at which the boobs stopped getting bigger. Like, an editor would step in or something. Or you would get to the point where you cannot draw the character in the same panel as her mahjong tiles without her breasts spilling over the tiles, and you’d go, “Well, this is now untenable.”
That did not happen. There is no ceiling. The frog is soup.
Point 2. The complete and utter mundanity of all of this.
It’s like this, okay: there’s no shortage of trashy ecchi manga out there. There’s a million other comics doing wildly bawdier things with wildly more improbable bishoujos.
The vibe with “Saki” is different.
It’s hard to explain this, but it feels like the world of the comic is fundamentally uninterested in the fanservice happening on the page. I cannot describe it as “leering”, because I cannot conceive of a person in the story from whose point of view one would leer. I think the artist is probably into it—I can’t imagine anyone is making her do this—but “Saki” the comic has no opinion on the matter.
There are essentially no male characters in “Saki”. Like, there was one guy? Kind of? At the very beginning? But he is gone now. They put him back in the toybox. He does not exist. It appears to be some level of canonical that in the world of “Saki”, almost all humans are women. Those women are sometimes romantically into each other. According to comments the artist has made on Twitter (which I cannot source), they have lesbian baby technology, so it’s no problem. It’s so much not a problem that the story is about mahjong, instead of any of that.
So, like, the fiction here appears to be this: this is the, like, meta-narrative of the fanservice of “Saki”, right: it’s just normal that they don’t wear underwear and their boobs are arbitrarily big. It’s been normal. It was normal before the story of the manga began. It’s just how things are. Nobody bats an eye about it, and if they do, it’s in sort of a lesbian kind of way so like what’s the problem, we love lesbians here. This is literally normal for girls.
The fanservice simply diffuses into this all-encompassing aura of disembodied, ambient sluttiness. The framing of the panels demands you acknowledge it, and the story demands you already be over it, because it’s mahjong time now, and we’re playing mahjong.
Do you get??? why I’m so fascinated??? Are you not a little enraptured???
Anyway, I have no idea how to end this weird post. I guess the conclusion is that women stay winning????
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I've seen pieces from this extra comic before, but never read the full thing until today. And holy shit does it hammer home just how much the story is about class.
Multiple times, when food comes up in this comic, it’s also in context of money:
I've seen this last panel on the right brought up before in context of like, dungeon meshi's relationship with fat and eating, but in the full context of the comic it really hits how much adventuring directly consumes bodies for money.
As much as this has been part of the story the whole time, showcased as early chapters 19 and 20...
It never fully hit me before how often adventuring comes down to having no other way to make money but to throw yourself into death repeatedly. To be used, whether it’s by individual selfish people (like the resurrection group that is happy to try and get Kabru's group to kill each other to get extra gold from them in chapter 32), or by the greater cog of the Dungeon Economy in general.
Which, to be clear, is all too often how things work in the real world, too. So many jobs burn through the health and lives of workers. Dungeon Meshi just makes it literal in a new way: by making the healing and resurrection, a core part to the adventuring loop, directly use fat, muscle, and energy from the body being healed.
Imagine Amazon, but if you got injured at work, they could literally burn up some of your body to get you back to working sooner. And that was seen as an advantage of the job.
And then you have Laios, thinking about eating monsters:
Not just because he likes monsters a lot. But because it would help. He says something similar in the actual manga too, during the chapter discussing his dream with the Winged Lion
Laios wants to be able to make a home for Falin. He wants to give her a place where she never has to eat alone. And when he gets a party, he wants to give them a way to eat well. And when he runs a country, well…
He wants to ensure that everyone has enough to eat.
Food is political. Food ties into class, and money. What is deemed "proper" to eat, what is a luxury, what is crass… so much of it comes down to money.
Being judged for eating what's available, when what is “proper” isn't affordable, is already a thing that happens. People forced into work that consumes their energy is already a thing that happens.
Dungeon Meshi has a lot of fantastical elements, but boy is its examination of food and class very real.
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#laios touden#dungeon meshi spoilers#the full thing is up on mangadex and I v much recommend giving it a read#dunmeshi analysis
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At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)
I am so normal about these old dorks.
I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.
I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.
Oh, and a little bonus comic:
Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)
Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:
Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)
Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃
In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)
Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#the book of bill#comics#i can't believe gravity falls and billford keep on trending almost three full months after the book of bill's release#this is incredible#maybe i will add more tags later idk#i have to go to WORK now blehhhhhh#oh right: Do Not Repost (good luck anyway lol. this is So Many images and all of them are Big XD)
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Thinking about a certain scene in Dungeon Meshi that completely encapsulates the Autistic experience of making friends as an adult and how hard it is to try and navigate it without ending up getting hurt.
Like IDK about y'all, but this is a common problem ALOT of Autistic Adults face when trying to make friends with other people, because unlike children who aren't good at keeping their opinions to themselves, Adults ARE. In society, we're even encouraged to "keep the peace" "be polite" and etc, which commonly leads to awful scenarios as shown above when Laois finds out his buddy has come to resent who Laois is without actually telling him. All too often the friends that we love to hang out with, people that we're so happy to spend time with, don't feel the same way and in many cases, come to blame us for our social cues or lack thereof.
And when/if we do eventually find out how our friend feels, Dungeon Meshi hits us with another painful panel of how that usually ends up playing out.
It's hard for Adults with Autism to make friends, and even harder to maintain them because alot of the ways Neurotypicals tell other Neurotypicals that they don't like a certain behavior is by quietly disengaging. Whether that involves having one sentence answers, going quiet, or having a certain tone in their voice, all those things signal annoyance or disapproval, but for the Neurodivergents, those subtle cues are completely missed.
And yet when we inevitably discover we DID do something, it is natural to ask "well why didn't you tell me?" because in our minds, it should've been the next step in the equation. However for the Neurotypicals, that's NOT something to bring up. Its important to be SUBTLE about the issue at hand and rely on signals to tell the other person. Blame is placed on us for not noticing the "obvious" signs of disapproval rather than the idea of talking it out as such things are uncomfortable and harder to do. Alot of the time what ends up happening is resentment due to the idea that it was "obvious" and the fact one didn't notice indicates a deliberate ignorance rather than a complete unawareness. It ends up calling into question our quality as a person and our sincerity. We get called "fake" or "malicious" or even "stupid" for failing social cues rather than questioning the decision to be indirect and vague.
For a manga about exploring the dungeon, it seems that the artist would rather explore very real and prevalent dynamics in society with the adventuring premise as a backdrop. I felt VERY seen in these panels, and many others, because it happens so suddenly and dare I say it, plainly. There's no dramatic build-up or spectacle made and in essence, it just Happens.
I think that's what makes the scene hit even harder. It seemingly comes out of nowhere for Laois, like how it always comes out of nowhere for alot of people, and it's never a dramatic twist either. It's always mundane and hurtful. A sudden unforeseen bump in the road that ends up calling into question one's entire friendship with someone and consequent other friendships. It asks "what if other friends feel the same. What if the people that I really like actually hate me and I don't know it?" Or at least that's what I came away with after reading the chapter. I've been where Laois was and the only reason I'm not there now is because I lost the naivete I had and doubt everyone else's sincerity.
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#laois touden#laois dungeon meshi#ryoko kui#dungeon meshi analysis#autistic things#autism#adults with autism#autistic adult#neurodiversity#neurodivergent
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How To Impress a 21st Century Girl.
Pairings: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader
Themes: Rom-Com, Fluff, Mutual Pining(Heavy?), First Date, Flirtation and Playfulness.
Summary: Sam had forced Bucky to use Tinder to solve his abysmal love life. Bucky tells himself that if third time isn't a charm, he will officially give up trying to find a partner.
A/N: I'm a sucker for rom-coms, I hope you guys enjoyed this because I enjoyed writing it.
tags: @hzdhrtss @winterslove1917
It had all been Sam’s idea. "Come on, man. You need to get back out there!" Sam had said, way too enthusiastically, while setting up a Tinder profile for him without even asking. Bucky had resisted at first, arguing that dating apps probably weren't his thing. But Sam was persistent, reminding him that it was 2024, not 1944, and that "no one meets in grocery stores anymore."
Reluctantly, Bucky had gone along with it, figuring it couldn’t hurt to try. What was the worst that could happen?
Well, now he knew.
Bucky was starting to think Tinder was out to get him. His first two dates had been disasters—and not just normal awkwardness, but spectacularly bad. The first girl, Jenny, had brought her ex-boyfriend to the date. Apparently, he was her ride, and they were still "good friends." Bucky had spent two hours third-wheeling a reunion he hadn’t signed up for. The second girl, Alicia, had a collection of ceramic frogs. And when Bucky said “collection,” he meant obsession. The girl spent an entire dinner showing him photos of different frog figurines. It was ribbiting. Literally. One of them even made croaking sounds.
So, now here he was, on date number three, standing outside some trendy café, wondering what fresh nightmare awaited him. This time, though, he’d let you plan the date. Maybe handing over control would be better than having to smile through another amphibian-themed dinner.
You showed up right on time, and Bucky was genuinely relieved to see no ex-boyfriend hovering in the background. You were wearing a paneled knit dress with spaghetti straps that hugged you just right, and your short hair was perfectly tousled. You smiled at him, but the look on your face told him you were just as unsure as he was.
“Hi,” you greeted, and Bucky instantly forgot every single normal response. Holy shit he is TALL.
“Hey, I’m Bucky.” he mumbled back. He was really nailing this whole dating thing.
You walked inside, and the café had that minimalist vibe. A lot of plants. A lot of exposed brick. The kind of place where you’re not sure if you’re supposed to sit or admire the interior design.
As you both sat down, Bucky tried to channel his inner suave. He could do this. He had faced way worse than an awkward date. Like alien invasions. Like that one time he lost his arm again. This was nothing.
Except... why was talking to an attractive woman harder than fighting off super soldiers?
“I, uh, like your dress,” Bucky said, already feeling the heat creep up his neck. Nice, Barnes, real original.
“Thanks,” you replied, with an amused smile playing on your lips. “I like your... jacket.”
Bucky nodded, looking down at his worn leather jacket. “Yeah. It’s... warm.”
Warm? That’s what you’re going with? He mentally slapped himself. This was going well. So well. He tried to change the subject and scanned the menu. “Uh... so, what’s good here?”
“I don’t know, I’ve never been,” you said, fiddling with the edge of your napkin. “The internet said they have good coffee, though.”
“Internet reviews, huh?” Bucky raised an eyebrow. “That’s always a gamble. Could be great... could be a disaster.”
Cue the awkward silence.
The waiter had barely placed the food in front of you both before the quiet tension stretched between you like you were sitting in a library, not a café. Bucky poked at his bagel as if it might come to life at any moment, while you took a delicate sip of your coffee, your eyes darting between him and the wall behind him.
You both chewed in the most nonchalant way possible, each of you hyper-aware of the silence that was growing louder by the second. You were mentally cursing every decision that led to this exact moment, and Bucky, for his part, was questioning whether retiring from the whole Avenger thing had been a mistake.
Say something. Anything, Bucky thought, taking another bite of his bagel, which suddenly felt like chewing rubber. Ask about herr favorite food? No, that’s boring. Comment on the weather? Oh, yeah, nothing like ‘Hey, it’s been cold lately,’ to really sweep her off her feet. Real smooth.
Meanwhile, you were trying to figure out how you managed to forget how to make normal conversation. Maybe ask him about his hobbies? No, that’s basic. Compliment his hair? What are you, in fifth grade? Pull yourself together!
Bucky, still chewing the world’s driest bagel, caught your eye for a split second, and you both did that polite half-smile thing that happens when you’re not sure whether you should talk or continue pretending to enjoy the food.
Did she just smile at me because I’m being awkward, or am I overthinking this? Bucky wondered, immediately breaking eye contact and pretending his coffee was the most fascinating thing on the table.
You, on the other hand, were screaming internally. Oh God, did I smile too weird? Was it the kind of smile that says, ‘I like you,’ or the one that says, ‘I’m trapped in this date and don’t know how to escape’?
You both took another sip of your drinks at the exact same time.
Alright, Barnes, get it together. Say something smart, Bucky told himself, putting his mug down carefully.
“So, uh... how’s your coffee?”
You blinked, your brain scrambling for a response. How’s my coffee? It’s coffee. Just say it’s good. Don’t overthink it.
“It’s... good. How’s your bagel?”
Bucky looked down at the circular piece of bread like it had personally betrayed him. “It’s... round.”
Round? Really? You went with ‘round’? Smooth, real smooth, he chastised himself, nodding like he had just made the most profound statement about bagels ever.
Your lips twitched. Did he just describe his food as ‘round’? Okay, maybe I’m not the only one struggling here.
You took another sip of your coffee, trying to hide your smile. God, this is like watching two middle schoolers on a first date.
You both glanced at each other again. Smile. Look away. Silence.
Bucky ran a hand through his hair. Alright, clearly, she thinks I’m a complete idiot. But it’s fine. I can recover. Just... find a topic. Literally any topic.
You picked at your napkin. Okay, maybe I should mention the escape room next. But what if he hates escape rooms? What if he thinks they’re boring? You cleared your throat slightly, ready to speak, but then—
Bucky cleared his throat at the same time. You both froze, staring at each other like deer caught in headlights.
“You go first,” Bucky said quickly.
“No, no, you first,” you insisted, waving your hand.
Bucky’s brain blanked. He blinked, searching for anything to say. “Uh... did you... park nearby?”
You stared at him, and then a smile slowly spread across your face. Did he really just ask me about parking? You nodded. “No I–um took public transport. Did you?”
Bucky gave a stiff nod. “Yeah. Close. Very close. Super convenient.”
You both stared at each other for a beat, and then, in a miraculous moment, you both cracked up at the exact same time.
“Parking?” you laughed, shaking your head. “That’s the best we’ve got?”
Bucky held up his hands. “Hey, I panicked, okay? The bagel threw me off.”
You wiped a tear from your eye, your shoulders shaking with laughter. “And I thought the frogs were bad.”
Bucky couldn’t help but laugh harder. “Okay, in my defense, this date is way better than ceramic frogs.”
“Glad to be the non-frog date.” You raised your cup in mock salute.
You both chuckled, and for the first time, the awkward tension seemed to melt away. Sure, you were a bit of a mess, but at least you were a mess together.
As you calmed down, you leaned forward, a playful grin on your face. “So, what’s next? You ready for the escape room?”
“I dunno. Should I be worried?” Bucky smirked, feeling a lot lighter.
“Only if you’re bad at puzzles,” you teased.
Bucky crossed his arms, leaning back with a smirk. “Oh, trust me, I think I’ll manage.”
And with that, you both finally stood up to head for the next part of your date, the awkwardness left behind with the round bagel and the overly complicated coffee.
× × × ×
As soon as you stepped into the Asylum escape room, the mood shifted from "awkward first date" to "this might be how I die."
Oh, great. Creepy hospital décor. Perfect first-date vibes. You eyed the flickering lights and eerie medical tools scattered around the room, trying not to let on how much it was creeping you out. At least it’s better than ceramic frogs, you thought, glancing at Bucky.
“This is supposed to be the hardest escape room they have,” you said, glancing at Bucky. “Takes most people at least an hour. You ready for this?”
“Yeah, sure. I mean... it’s puzzles, right? How hard can it be?” Bucky shoved his hands in his pockets, trying to appear calm. I’ve literally fought aliens. How bad could a few puzzles be?
“You’ve never done one of these before, right?” You looked at him, a bit skeptical.
He shook his head. “First time. But, uh... I’m good under pressure.” Under pressure? What am I saying? I sound like I’m about to defuse a bomb, not solve a riddle. Get a grip, Barnes.
“Alright. Let’s do this.” You smiled, trying to hide your own nerves.
The clock started ticking, and immediately, you were plunged into darkness. A loud creak echoed through the room, followed by a voice over the intercom: “Welcome to the Asylum. You have 60 minutes to escape. Good luck... you’ll need it.”
Perfect. Creepy voice? Check. Flickering lights? Check. Yep, I'm doomed. You moved toward a stack of papers, squinting at the dim lighting. “Okay, first thing’s first... we need to find the clues hidden in this room to unlock the door.”
Before you could even start, Bucky was already inspecting a random pipe on the wall. He tugged at it, and it came loose, revealing a hidden key taped to the back. Oh, that was... lucky? Or did I just break something?
You froze mid-step. “Wait. How did you—”
“I... uh... just pulled on it.” Bucky looked just as surprised as you. Did I just accidentally solve this?
“Okay. Lucky guess.” You stared at him.
Bucky shrugged. “Maybe.” Play it cool, Barnes. Don't look like you’re clueless here.
You both moved into the next room, which had even creepier décor. Faint writing on the walls, jars filled with unidentifiable things, and a mannequin in the corner that Bucky immediately side-eyed like it was going to jump out at you. Okay, I don’t trust that mannequin. Why’s it looking at me like that?
You picked up a piece of paper with some cryptic writing on it. “This says something about finding the light within the dark. I think it’s a clue. We need to—”
“Found it,” Bucky called out.
You turned to see him holding up a blacklight. How does he keep doing this?!
“They always hide something with a blacklight, right?” He grinned, flashing the light on the wall, revealing a series of glowing numbers. That’s a thing, right? People hide stuff with these lights all the time... right?
“Oh, you’re just full of ideas now, huh?” You crossed your arms, smirking.
Bucky rubbed the back of his neck, trying to play it cool. “Just... using my instincts.” Yep. Totally knew that.
You worked through the next few puzzles, but by "worked," what you really meant was Bucky accidentally stumbling into the solutions. Every time you tried to figure out a clue, Bucky would casually touch something, pull a lever, or press a random button that—surprise—opened the next door or revealed the next key. At first, you thought he was joking. But as the minutes ticked by, it became clear: Bucky was somehow solving the escape room by sheer dumb luck—or so you thought.
This is starting to freak me out... Am I secretly a genius? Bucky thought.
At one point, you were trying to decipher a complicated code etched into the wall, mumbling to yourself about numerology and patterns, when Bucky—completely oblivious—pulled a book off the shelf, and a hidden door creaked open in the floor.
No. No way. “Are you—” You blinked. “Did you just—”
Bucky glanced at the open trapdoor, confused. “What? Was that not supposed to happen?”
You slapped your forehead. “No! I mean, yes, but—oh my God, Bucky, you’re breaking the game.”
He raised his hands in surrender. “I swear I’m not doing it on purpose!” Seriously, I just touched a book. How is that a thing?
You looked down at the trapdoor, then back at him. “What are you? A puzzle savant? Did you plan this?”
Bucky laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. “Nah, I just thought the book looked weird.” Great, now she thinks I’m some kind of escape room wizard.
You gaped at him. “The book looked weird?” Weird? Dude, I’m starting to think you have X-ray vision.
“I mean... yeah. It was dusty.” It wasn’t even that weird... or was it?
You squinted at him, hands on your hips. “You’re telling me you spotted a dusty book and thought, ‘Aha! Hidden door.’?”
“Isn’t that... what you’re supposed to do in these rooms?” Bucky shrugged, looking genuinely sorry. Please tell me that's how this works.
This man is unbelievable. You stared at him for a long moment before bursting out laughing. “Oh my God. You’re accidentally good at this. You’re just walking around solving stuff like you do this every weekend!”
Bucky chuckled, his shoulders relaxing a little. I have no idea what I’m doing, but I’m glad she’s laughing. “I swear I’ve never done this before.” This isn’t even the weirdest thing that’s happened to me this week.
“I don’t know whether to be impressed or terrified,” you teased, stepping closer to him. “You’re like a walking cheat code.” Sure, Sherlock. Whatever you say.
“Hey, I’m just here to help.” He smiled, clearly enjoying your reaction. At least she’s impressed. That’s something.
I think you might secretly be a robot. You shook your head, grinning. “Alright, escape room prodigy, let’s see if you can crack the last one.”
You entered the final room—a dimly lit chamber with a creepy-looking mannequin in the corner and random medical equipment scattered around. You narrowed your eyes.
“Okay, this is the hardest part. No way you’re going to just... guess your way out of this one.”
“Yeah, this one’s. . . tricky.” Bucky glanced around, clearly trying to look casual. Please don’t let me stumble into the solution again...
Please don’t let him find the solution immediately. Just this once.
You pointed at the mannequin. “We need to find a code hidden somewhere in this room. The clue says it’s ‘locked in the mind.’ So it has to be something mental, right? Like a puzzle?”
Bucky stared at the mannequin for a second, then slowly reached out and twisted its head off. Inside, there was a slip of paper with the code on it. Oh, come on. You’ve got to be kidding me.
“Are you KIDDING me?!” Your jaw dropped.
“I just thought... you know... maybe the head comes off?” Bucky held up the paper, looking sheepish.
Why am I even here?! You threw your hands up in the air. “Of COURSE the head comes off! Because that makes total sense! Sure!”
Bucky bit back a laugh. “Well, it did say ‘locked in the mind.’” Technically, I was right.
You glared at him, then shook your head, laughing despite yourself. “Okay, that’s it. You’re banned from escape rooms. You ruin them.”
“Ruined it?” Bucky asked, grinning. “We escaped, didn’t we?” She’s totally impressed, even if she won’t admit it.
“We escaped in twelve minutes, Bucky! Twelve!” You slapped his arm playfully. “That’s not normal!”
He laughed, ducking his head. “Sorry?” Guess I’m not so bad at this ‘fun date’ thing.
As you both stepped out of the escape room, the staff was standing there, looking like they’d just witnessed the impossible.
“You’re... done?” Pink-haired Girl asked, your eyes wide with disbelief.
Wow. They look like I just told them Santa isn’t real, Bucky thought.
You, just as confused, looked over at Bucky. “Uh. . .yeah, I guess?”
“Looks like it.” Bucky gave a casual shrug. No big deal. Just casually shattering dreams.
Clipboard Guy checked his stopwatch again, his mouth hanging open. “Twelve minutes. No. That’s not possible. People are supposed to break down in there. We’ve had people cry!”
Cry? What is this, an escape room or emotional boot camp? “You want me to go back in and tear up a little? You know, for the full experience?” Bucky raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at his lips.
“People have left that room emotionally damaged. You just... strolled out.” Pink-haired Girl blinked.
You stared at Bucky, still wrapping your head around it. “I didn’t even get through the first clue, and you were already unlocking half the room.”
“You were working hard. I just sped things up a bit.” Bucky chuckled softly, glancing at you with a playful smile. I mean, you were giving it a solid effort...
The Master of Puzzles guy appeared, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “Did you... have the answers beforehand? Because that’s the hardest room we’ve got. We’ve had people rage-quit in there.”
Bucky rubbed the back of his neck, looking amused. “Nah, just good at finding my way out of things.”
“I didn’t even do anything. You solved the whole thing!” You shook your head, still half-laughing, half in disbelief.
“Hey, you were a great moral support.” Bucky smiled at you, nudging you lightly. Seriously, though, it’s good to have someone to watch while I dismantle a room’s dignity.
Clipboard Guy muttered, “We’re gonna have to ban him. He’s banned.”
Oh no, I’ve ruined their sacred puzzle temple.
“He broke the hardest room we’ve got. Who even does that?” Pink-haired Girl nodded, still dumbfounded.
“Well, I’d offer to go back and struggle a bit, but... I don’t think it’d be convincing.” Bucky smirked, leaning casually against the counter. Trust me, I can’t fake being bad at something. Even if I tried.
As you headed for the exit, Bucky held the door open for you, giving the staff one last glance before he leaned over to you, voice low.
“What? You wanted to be stuck in there all night?”
“Honestly? It would’ve been nice to solve at least one puzzle.” You groaned, though you were smiling.
“Next time, I’ll let you have the first clue. Promise.” Bucky chuckled softly. And by let you, I mean I’ll stand far away from everything and try not to accidentally win.
“You better.” You laughed, shaking your head as you both stepped out into the night.
× × × ×
The arcade was buzzing with lights, sounds, and the faint scent of popcorn. It was a complete shift from the eerie asylum escape room, and you were already eyeing the rows of flashing machines and claw games with glee.
Alright, this is more like it. No creepy mannequins here, just good old-fashioned fun.
Bucky, on the other hand, looked around like he had just entered a foreign world. The last time he’d been in an arcade, they didn’t have all this flashing neon or half the games that were here now. What happened to the simple stuff? Pinball machines and jukeboxes. Now I’ve got ten-foot robots staring at me while kids slap buttons like their lives depend on it.
Still, he couldn’t help but smile at how excited you looked. Okay, if she’s this excited, maybe this won’t be so bad.
“Okay, so... how does this place work again?” he asked, watching a kid furiously slap buttons at a nearby game.
You laughed, giving him a gentle nudge. “It’s simple! We just play a bunch of games, earn tickets, and then trade them in for really weird prizes. Easy.”
Bucky nodded, though he still looked a little confused. “So, you win tickets by—?”
“By being amazing at games, obviously,” you said, your eyes already darting toward a nearby basketball shooting game. “Let’s see if you can keep up.”
Bucky followed you, a small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. “Oh, I’ll keep up.” Alright, let’s see if I remember how to be competitive at... basketball?
You started with basketball, and while you had a decent shot, Bucky quickly became the Michael Jordan of arcade basketball. He tossed shot after shot into the hoop with ridiculous ease, barely even looking like he was trying.
Oh, come on. Seriously? Why is he good at everything? You shook your head in disbelief. “Oh, come on. Are you serious right now? Are you even aiming?”
“I dunno. I just... throw.” Bucky shrugged, not missing a single shot.
“This is what I get for going on a date with someone who’s literally built for accuracy.” You playfully narrowed your eyes at him. Why am I pretending like I’m mad? It’s honestly impressive.
He flashed a boyish grin. “You wanted to see if I could keep up.” Oh, I’m keeping up, doll.
You crossed your arms, pretending to pout. “I wasn’t trying to lose in record time.”
When the game ended, Bucky had a ridiculous amount of points, and you had... well, significantly fewer. He collected your combined tickets from the machine, glancing down at you with a playful glint in his eyes.
“Should I carry these, or do you want to hold on to the three tickets you earned?” he teased, raising an eyebrow.
How is he still charming even while teasing me? This is unfair. You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you snatched a couple of tickets from his hand with a grin. “You know what? Fuck you.”
“Careful, doll. You keep talking like that, and I might just take you up on it.” Bucky’s smirk widened, and he leaned in a little closer, lowering his voice just enough to make your pulse quicken.
Okay, that was a little too good. I should not be blushing right now. Your eyes widened for a second, a flush creeping up your neck before you shot him a playful glare. “You wish.”
“You know I don’t have to wish for anything.” He chuckled, stepping back with a wink.
Well, that escalated quickly. You tried to bite back your smile, but it was impossible with the way he was looking at you. “I’m starting to regret bringing you here.”
Bucky held up the stack of tickets, grinning like a kid who just won the lottery. “You’re only regretting it because I’m walking away with all the prizes.” Did I just turn an arcade into a battlefield?
“Yeah, yeah, keep rubbing it in.” You huffed, shaking your head, though the smile on your face said otherwise.
Bucky shot you another wink. “Oh, I plan to.”
This guy is dangerous with that smile. You smirked, leaning in a little. “So... what happened to the awkward guy who pointed out that bagels are round? Because this,” you waved at the arcade tickets, “does not feel like the same guy.”
“What? You weren’t impressed by my bagel observations?” Bucky chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. I was doing my best back then, okay?
You laughed, giving him a playful nudge. “Oh, I was very impressed. I just didn’t know you were hiding this arcade legend behind all that bagel wisdom.”
He grinned, eyes glinting. “I’m full of surprises, doll.” You have no idea.
“Clearly,” you said, still teasing him as you walked toward the next game. “Let’s see how many more surprises you’ve got.”
You dragged him over to the shooting gallery game, where you were met with an array of plastic rifles and paper targets.
“I’m kinda good at this,” you declared, grabbing one of the rifles with renewed determination. “You can’t have a crazy aim for everything.” Finally, something I can win.
Bucky raised an eyebrow, amused. “Okay. Let’s see what you got.”
You aimed and fired... missing every single target. You winced as the targets flipped back and forth, mocking you with their tiny, evil faces. Are you kidding me?
“You’re holding it too tight.” Bucky stepped up beside you, arms crossed, a smirk playing on his lips.
“Oh, great. Here we go. The expert.” You groaned. Of course, I’m holding it too tight. Leave it to Bucky to know everything.
Bucky smiled, but instead of saying anything, he stepped behind you, wrapping his arms around you, his hands gently guiding yours on the plastic gun. You froze, your heart skipping a beat as you felt the warmth of him so close. His breath was soft against your ear as he leaned in to guide your aim, his voice low and steady.
Why does he have to be so good at this? I can barely think straight.
“Relax,” he murmured, his hands adjusting yours gently. “Don’t grip it so hard. Just like this.”
How am I supposed to relax when he’s practically wrapped around me?
Your pulse quickened, your senses suddenly overwhelmed by how close he was. His cologne—woodsy and warm—filled your lungs, making you a little dizzy. You swallowed hard, focusing on anything but the way your back pressed against his chest. “Okay... relax. Right. Got it.”
“You’re not relaxing.” Bucky’s voice was low, almost teasing.
Yeah, no kidding. Not exactly easy when you smell like a lumberjack dream.
“I am relaxed!” you shot back, though your heart was racing so fast you were sure he could hear it.
Bucky chuckled, and the soft rumble of his laugh vibrated against your back. “If you were relaxed, you wouldn’t be holding your breath.”
If she’s holding her breath, I must be doing something right.
You blinked, realizing that yes, you were in fact holding your breath. You exhaled slowly, trying to focus on the targets instead of the fact that Bucky was basically wrapped around you.
“Good,” he said quietly, his hands still steadying yours. “Now, pull the trigger. Nice and easy.”
Yeah, this is totally normal. Just shooting targets, totally not thinking about how close we are.
You followed his lead, squeezing the trigger gently. The shot rang out, and the sound of a hit echoed through the machine. The target flipped backward, signaling a perfect hit.
“I did it!” you exclaimed, your excitement bubbling over as you turned your head to look at him.
Your faces were just inches apart. Bucky’s eyes locked on yours, and for a moment, neither of you moved. The air between you was thick with tension, the good kind—the kind that makes your heart race and your stomach flip.
God, she’s close. Just a little closer...
Your gaze flickered down to his lips, and Bucky swallowed hard, momentarily forgetting where you were or what you were doing. All he could think about was how easy it would be to lean in just a little more, to—
“Uh, sorry!” A kid nearby bumped into the machine, jolting you both out of the moment.
Of course. Great timing, kid.
You quickly stepped out of Bucky’s embrace, your face flushed. “Well, um... thanks for the lesson, Barnes.”
Bucky cleared his throat, his ears a little pink. “Yeah. Anytime.” Anytime? Seriously, Barnes? That’s all you’ve got?
You moved on to a few more games, but the tension between you still lingered, electric and unspoken. After a particularly intense game of air hockey (where you almost won, thanks to Bucky being a little too distracted by you), you found yourselves at the prize counter.
Your eyes scanned the shelves, but one prize in particular caught your attention: an absolutely massive goose plush sitting at the top of the prize display. It was ridiculous, almost comically large, but it made you smile instantly.
“Oh my God,” you muttered, pointing. “That goose is so cute.”
Bucky followed your gaze and raised an eyebrow. A goose? Really? She could pick anything, and it’s that giant bird?
“You like that thing?” he asked, tilting his head slightly.
“I mean, look at it. It’s the size of a couch,” you said, laughing. “No one’s ever gonna win enough tickets for that.”
Bucky looked thoughtful for a second. Then, without saying a word, he handed all of your tickets to the guy at the counter. Challenge accepted, doll.
The kid behind the counter stared at him. “Uh, you know this isn’t enough for the goose, right?”
Bucky nodded. “Yeah, but... what’s it take to win that thing?”
Because clearly, winning giant plush birds is my new priority in life.
The kid blinked. “Like... a thousand tickets.”
Bucky smirked, then turned to you. “Wait here.”
“What are you doing?” You frowned, confused.
Please don’t say you’re going to try and win a thousand tickets... oh my God, he’s going to try and win a thousand tickets.
Bucky said nothing and disappeared into the crowd. A few minutes later, you saw him at one of those old-school, rigged basketball games. His face was calm, determined—like he was about to go to war.
One after the other, Bucky sank shot after shot, racking up points so fast that you had to rub your eyes to believe it. Within minutes, he had earned a mountain of tickets. He moved on to another game, this time skee-ball, and then to another. Every single game, he dominated, earning enough tickets to make the counter kid’s jaw drop when he returned with what looked like a roll of tickets big enough to use as a belt.
“Holy crap,” you muttered, watching as Bucky handed the tickets over, a satisfied smirk on his face. The kid counted them, eyes wide, then slowly reached for the giant goose plush.
The oversized goose was practically half Bucky’s height as he carried it back over to you, grinning.
“Here you go,” he said, handing it to you with a proud look. “You said you liked it, right?”
Who just... casually wins a giant goose plush? How did he do that?
You stared at the giant, fluffy creature, then at him, your heart flipping over itself. “Bucky... this is insane. It’s huge.”
“Well, I couldn’t just leave without winning you something.” He shrugged, his grin boyish and a little shy. Yeah, Barnes, act like you’re not insanely proud of yourself right now.
He’s... adorable. Stop. Focus. “You really didn’t have to... but I love it.” You laughed, hugging the goose to your chest.
“Good.” Bucky’s eyes softened as he watched you smile. Worth every single ticket.
Your heart raced, your face heating up as you looked at him over the massive plush. “You’re full of surprises, Barnes. Who knew you’d be this good at arcades?”
Just trying to impress the girl, no big deal.
“Maybe I just wanted to impress you.” He smiled, a little more reserved this time.
Well, mission accomplished, buddy. You blushed, the air between you crackling again with that familiar tension. “Well, mission accomplished.”
You stood there for a moment, just smiling at each other, the absurdly large goose between you, until you laughed and nudged him with your elbow.
“You know, this might be the best date I’ve ever been on,” you said, your tone light but sincere. Was that too much? Did I just over-share?
Bucky’s smile grew, his eyes softening. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you said softly, holding the goose a little tighter. “Definitely the best.” Okay, that was smooth. Not awkward at all.
You left the arcade with the giant goose plush between you, its goofy face almost mocking the awkwardness that had suddenly crept back into your steps. Bucky walked beside you, hands stuffed into his jacket pockets, trying to figure out what to say.
Do I say something? Or just... keep walking?
The sounds of the city filled the silence around you, but neither of you spoke. The playful energy from the arcade had faded into something quieter, more uncertain.
Why am I so bad at this? Just say something, Barnes.
After a long stretch of quiet, Bucky cleared his throat. “So... is this the end?” Smooth, real smooth.
You blinked and glanced over at him, trying to keep your heart from doing a flip at his words. “Well, that’s all I had planned. Why?”
Bucky hesitated, his jaw tightening slightly as he looked ahead, his mind clearly weighing something. Okay, don’t screw this up. Don’t sound too eager.
For a moment, you thought maybe he was going to say goodbye, that maybe this was the end of your date after all. But then, he spoke quietly, almost as if he was embarrassed to admit it.
“I kind of don’t want to go home yet.” Well, there it is. Now she knows.
You felt a flutter in your chest, your face heating up as a small, shy smile tugged at your lips. You ducked your head, looking down at the sidewalk to hide the blush creeping across your cheeks. The way he said it—so simple but sincere—made your heart skip.
Why does that sound so much cuter than it should? You bit your lip, an idea suddenly coming to you.
“Well...” you started, glancing up at him. “There’s a new building by the riverside with a sky deck. It just opened recently, and it’s supposed to have the best view of the city.”
“Sky deck, huh?” Bucky raised an eyebrow, intrigued. A sky deck? Yeah, that sounds better than awkwardly walking home.
You nodded, a little more excited now. “Yeah. It’s pretty high up, and overlooks the whole city. I haven’t been yet, but I heard it’s amazing at night.”
“Sounds better than going home.” Bucky tilted his head slightly, his lips curving into a soft smile. Thank God. I’m not ready for this to be over yet.
“Then let’s go.” You grinned, feeling your heart race just a little faster.
You shared a quick, almost nervous glance at each other before walking in the direction of the riverside. The awkwardness wasn’t completely gone, but now, it was laced with anticipation, a kind of giddy energy that made your stomach flutter. You hugged the plush goose a little tighter, trying not to let your excitement show too much, but inside, you were buzzing.
× × × ×
The city lights shimmered below you as you lounged on the comfy chairs, drinks in hand. The night air was cool, but it didn’t come close to breaking the warmth buzzing between you and Bucky.
She’s... something else, Bucky thought, leaning back slightly. His gaze kept shifting between the breathtaking skyline and you, but he found himself more captivated by you. How am I supposed to focus on the view when she looks like that?
Noticing the quiet, you smirked. “So, you were really gonna end the night without showing off more of your endless talents?”
Oh, she’s teasing now. Alright, two can play this game. Bucky raised an eyebrow, amused. “What, beating you at arcade games wasn’t enough?”
You laughed, shaking your head. “You’re a walking cheat code, Bucky. But I feel like there’s more you’re holding back.”
His eyes flickered over your face, lingering on your lips for just a little too long. More than you know, doll. “Maybe I am.”
Your breath caught for a second, but you quickly recovered, tilting your head and flashing him a grin. “Oh yeah? Like what? Some secret talent I should know about?”
Keep your cool, Barnes. Don't blow it now.
Bucky leaned in just a fraction, his voice lowering, his eyes never leaving yours. “I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve. But I only show them to people who ask nicely.”
God, does he have to sound that smooth? Your heart flipped at the way he was looking at you, intense, as if he was seeing through every joke and teasing comment. How am I supposed to keep this casual?
“Nicely, huh? And what do I have to do for you to show me?” you asked, your voice quieter now, the playful banter fading into something more charged.
“Keep hanging around,” he said softly.
I’m in deep now. Bucky's eyes dropped to your lips again, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to blur into nothing. Should I kiss her? Maybe I’m reading this wrong...
His eyes dropped to your lips again, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to blur into nothing. It was just him—his voice, his presence, the way he was looking at you like he wanted to kiss you but was holding back.
You swallowed, feeling the tension build like a slow fire. You sipped your drink, trying to cool yourself down, but it did little to shake the feeling that something between you had shifted. Stop overthinking, just go with it.
“I could do that,” you murmured, a small smile playing on your lips. You felt his eyes on you, and the air between you felt electric. You glanced at him, catching him staring at your lips again. Your pulse jumped. He’s really staring... isn’t he?
“You’re staring,” you said, teasing, though your voice had a soft edge to it, your heart thudding in your chest.
Bucky blinked, caught, but instead of pulling away, he smirked. “Am I?”
Yeah, Bucky, play it cool. Like you haven’t been staring for the past five minutes.
“Mhm,” you teased, though your voice was barely steady. Why does that smirk make my heart race? “I mean, I get it. The view’s great and all.”
Bucky’s smirk deepened, his voice dropping lower. “You could say that.”
I can’t believe this is actually happening. You felt your face heat up at the way he was looking at you. The intensity of his gaze made your stomach do wild flips. Why is this so... intense?
“You’re not just talking about the city, are you?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
He chuckled softly, sending shivers down your spine. Just kiss her already. “Maybe not.”
Your breath hitched. “And what are you looking at?”
He leaned in slightly, his gaze locked on yours. “What do you think?”
She knows exactly what I’m looking at.
Your heart raced, the pull between you growing stronger with every passing second. His eyes kept flicking down to your lips, making you wonder if he was going to kiss you. I really shouldn’t wait any longer...
Bucky cleared his throat suddenly, as if shaking off the trance he’d been in, and leaned back into his seat, looking almost embarrassed. Okay, maybe I’m rushing this.
“Sorry... I didn’t mean to—”
“No,” you interrupted quickly, your voice softer, gentler now. God, why did he stop? “Don’t be. I didn’t mind.”
His gaze snapped back to yours, the tension flaring again. She didn’t mind? Well, maybe I didn’t screw up, after all—or I did because you didn’t kiss her you idiot. He opened his mouth to say something, but instead, a soft smile tugged at his lips, and his expression softened.
“So... orthopedic ward, huh?” he said, shifting the conversation, though his eyes were still locked on you. “How do you handle that? All those broken bones?”
Smooth, Barnes. Talk about bones to distract yourself from the fact you were just about to kiss her.
You took a deep breath, relieved for the break in intensity but missing it instantly. Great, now I’m thinking about how close he was... “Well, it’s mostly convincing people not to do dumb things. Like skateboarding down staircases. You wouldn’t believe what people put themselves through.”
Bucky chuckled. Yeah, I believe it. Considering I’ve done dumber things in my time. “I can believe it. I’ve been there.”
You raised an eyebrow. “You’ve skateboarded down staircases?”
“No, but I’ve done some pretty stupid things in my time,” he admitted, leaning in again. Pretty sure falling for you might top the list. “But if I did something dumb, you’d patch me up, right?”
You smirked, your eyes twinkling. He’s flirting again. I can’t take this seriously. “Oh, I’d patch you up. But I’d make sure to remind you how dumb you were the entire time.”
“Fair,” Bucky said, the distance between you shrinking again. Patch me up, lecture me—just keep talking, I don’t care. “But I think I’d be a good patient.”
You shook your head with a grin. Good patient? Doubtful. “I doubt that. You’d probably complain the whole time.”
“I wouldn’t,” he replied, his tone teasing but soft. I’d let her take care of me, no problem. “If you were the one taking care of me, I’d be on my best behavior.”
He’s definitely not just talking about broken bones... Your heart skipped at the way he was looking at you again, his voice dropping to something more intimate. The banter was light, but underneath it all, there was that same intensity. Okay, now I’m thinking about kissing him again...
“You don’t strike me as someone who’s ever on their best behavior,” you teased softly, though your breath caught in your throat.
Bucky smirked, his eyes flicking to your lips again. “Maybe you bring it out in me.”
God, I hope so.
The words hung between you, heavy with meaning. Your pulse raced, and you leaned into the moment, letting the tension simmer between you, unspoken but undeniable. He’s close again…
“I’ll have to see that for myself,” you whispered, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heartbeat.
She’s close, too. Just lean in, Barnes. Bucky’s gaze darkened, his voice low and rough. “You just might.”
A small smile tugged at your lips as the tension between you crackled, thick and electric. You shifted slightly, leaning in with a playful smirk. “So... tell me, you got any other dates lined up after this one?”
Bucky’s eyes flickered with amusement as he leaned back, crossing his arms. Dates? I can barely keep up with this one. “Why? You worried I’ve got someone else lined up?”
You grinned, holding his gaze. “Maybe. Should I be?”
Not a chance. He leaned in closer, the space between you shrinking as his voice dropped lower. “I don’t know... do you have any other dates lined up?”
He’s really turning this on me, huh? You blinked, your heart racing, but you quickly shot back, “Well, maybe... maybe not. Depends on how this one ends.”
Bucky chuckled softly, his eyes dropping to your lips again, the intensity rising. Alright, Barnes, time to end this date right. “Guess I better make sure it ends right, then.”
Before you could respond, Bucky reached out, his fingers gently tilting your chin up. His other hand slid to the back of your neck, his thumb brushing tenderly against your cheek as he leaned in, your lips so close you could feel his breath.
Your heart was pounding, your breath shallow, as his parted lips brushed against yours, soft and slow, his head tilting just slightly. The kiss was gentle at first, his lips locking against yours in a way that made everything around you fade to nothing. He could taste the faint sweetness of your daiquiri on your lips, and with a soft groan, his tongue did a slow, savoring lick against your bottom lip before slipping past, deepening the kiss.
Your hands instinctively moved up, cupping his face as you kissed him back, your fingers sliding along the scruff of his jaw. The warmth of his touch, the way his thumb stroked your cheek, the way his lips moved against yours —everything about it was intoxicating, pulling you under.
Then Bucky pulled back for a quick gasp, his breath mingling with yours , before diving back in, capturing your lips with even more intensity. The kiss deepened, more urgent this time, as though neither of you wanted the moment to end. His hand on your nape tightened slightly, pulling you closer as the kiss intensified, his lips pressing more firmly against yours.
They didn’t stop until they couldn’t breathe anymore, finally pulling apart when the need for air overtook you, both of you breathless and flushed. Their foreheads rested together, the cool night air doing little to cool the heat between you. Bucky’s thumb gently stroked your cheek as he whispered, his voice rough, “Definitely no other dates lined up after this.”
You smiled, your hands still cradling his face, your heart pounding. “Good. Neither do I.”
× × × ×
As Bucky’s motorcycle came to a slow stop outside your house, and glanced up at your front porch. You hopped off the bike, shaking out your hair with a satisfied grin.
That ride was way too short... you thought, glancing at him as you handed Bucky his helmet, which he stubbornly told you to wear instead of him.
Bucky, being the gentleman, didn’t just let you off with a wave. He slid off the bike and stood up straight, dusting his hands like he was about to help carry your groceries.
Alright, Barnes. Play it cool.
"I’ll walk you up," he said casually, like it wasn’t 2024 and people usually just waved from their cars.
You raised an eyebrow, your lips quirking into a smirk. "You’re walking me to my porch?"
Bucky nodded, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. She thinks it’s weird? Hell, I thought that’s what you’re supposed to do.
“Of course. What kind of guy lets a lady walk to her door alone?” he replied, shrugging like this was completely normal.
You tried not to laugh, biting your lip to hold back a smile. He’s serious. Oh my God, he’s really serious. "Wow, okay, Mr. 1940s. What’s next, you gonna tip your hat and call me ‘ma’am’?"
Bucky smirked, taking a step closer. Alright, go with it, Barnes. “I could, if that’s what you’re into.”
You snorted, rolling your eyes but smiling as you walked together toward your porch. He’s ridiculous... and kinda sweet. You couldn’t help but notice how he slowed his pace just a little, like he was savoring the moment, hands tucked into his jacket pockets, casual yet somehow... considerate.
When you reached your porch, Bucky stopped, glancing at your door as if making sure it was safe territory. This is it. Play it smooth.
You turned to him, unable to hold back a laugh this time. "So, do I get a secret code to get into my own house, or...?"
Bucky grinned, leaning casually against the porch railing. “Just making sure you get home safe.”
Alright, Barnes, she’s not buying it. But hey, it worked.
“You know, they invented porch lights for a reason.” You shook your head, amused. He’s seriously acting like my personal bodyguard right now.
“What can I say? Old habits die hard.” Bucky shrugged, leaning in just a little closer, that playful glint in his eye. Please don’t laugh, please don’t laugh.
You looked up at him, crossing your arms with a smirk. “You know, there’s a fine line between being a gentleman and babysitting.”
Bucky chuckled. She’s killing me with that smirk. “Hey, you never know. There could be a rogue bagel out here, just waiting to trip you up.”
Oh, not the bagels again. “Oh my God, not the bagels again!” you burst out laughing, shaking your head.
He raised an eyebrow, his grin widening. “You know they’re round, right?”
This man is unbelievable. You groaned, pressing a hand to your forehead. “I think we’ve officially come full circle.”
“Just like a bagel.” Bucky gave a slow, dramatic nod.
You couldn’t help but laugh again, but you shook your head, standing on your porch with your hands on your hips. Why do I like this guy so much?
“Alright, alright, you’ve escorted me safely to my door. Anything else, or are you going to salute me goodbye?”
Bucky’s grin softened, and with a playful twinkle in his eye, he gave a small, mock salute. She’s gotta be messing with me right now, right? “Goodnight, ma’am.”
“Goodnight, soldier.” You couldn’t stop smiling as you opened your door, turning back to look at him. Don’t walk away, don’t walk away yet...
As you slipped inside, you peeked out one last time, watching as Bucky lingered for a second, that charming smirk still on his face before he finally turned and headed back to his bike. Say something, Barnes. Don’t just leave like a dork.
But then he stopped, halfway to his bike, and turned back around, something flickering in his eyes.
No, I’m not leaving yet. Not without...
Before you could ask what he was doing, Bucky closed the distance between you with a few long strides. Without hesitating, he gently tilted your chin up, his thumb brushing your cheek as he leaned in and kissed you—soft, quick, but just enough to make your heart race. His lips parted against yours, and for a split second, you tasted the warmth of him before he pulled back, just enough to meet your eyes.
That... was... wow.
Your breath caught in your throat, your heart doing a somersault. Did that just happen? You were still processing when Bucky grinned, his voice a little more hushed. “I guess I couldn’t leave without a proper goodbye.”
Smooth, Barnes. Real smooth.
You blinked, trying to find your voice, but all that came out was a soft, “No complaints here.”
Bucky chuckled softly, his hand still lingering at your neck for a moment longer. Then, he cleared his throat, stepping back a bit. “Hey, uh... you got a number I could call sometime?”
He’s asking for my number after that?
You smiled, feeling your heart flutter as you reached into your pocket, grabbing your phone. “Yeah, here—let me put it in.”
As you typed in your number, Bucky watched you, that familiar twinkle back in his eyes. Best decision I’ve made all night.
When you handed his phone back, your fingers brushed his, sending a small jolt up your arm. Yep, I’m done for.
Bucky pocketed the phone, flashing that boyish grin again. “Alright. I’ll call you.”
Yeah, you better. “I’ll hold you to that.”
He took a slow step down from the porch, but not without glancing over his shoulder one more time. “Goodnight... again.”
You stood there, grinning like an idiot. “Goodnight, Bucky.”
As Bucky made his way back to his bike, you slipped inside your house, leaning against the door as your heart raced. Did he really just kiss me? Again? Oh, this is definitely not over.
You peeked out one last time through the crack in the door, watching him as he swung his leg over his bike. Even from your doorway, you could hear him muttering with a smirk, “Just trying to keep the rogue bagels at bay.”
You rolled your eyes, laughing softly as you finally closed the door behind you, your heart racing a little more than you expected. I’m never going to forget this night...
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There are men across the street.
The house (and you use the term generously) that slumps there has been vacant for some time now. Ever since you moved in a couple years ago, actually. It’s an eyesore for sure. Graffiti on the walls, boards on the windows, a basketball-sized hole in the roof. The porch is the worst of it. Sagging in the middle and crumbling on the ends, stripped and moss-encrusted wood.
But today there are men there, stomping up and down the groaning steps in big, steel-toed boots.
You watch for a bit from the safety of your kitchen window, sipping coffee and batting your cat off the counter. They don’t look like a normal construction crew - wearing all black and not so much as a hammer on their belts. Three of them that you can see, one about average height, one tall, and one very tall. The tall one tags after the shortest of them often, gets pushed and shoved and snapped at it seems like.
You lose interest when the coffee runs out and your phone chimes, shooing you off to the grocery store. All three have disappeared inside by the time you saunter out, keys jingling and reusable bags in hand.
Margot says they’re renovating - likely some rich man’s retirement project. The same thing happened just down the street six months before you moved in, and now Joe has solar panels.
She postulates over the situation across the street while taking delicate bites of the cheesecake she brought over. (A test recipe for her niece’s baby shower in a few weeks. You don’t tell her that it’s too sweet and just sip your tea between bites.) She hypothesizes that one of them is this hypothetical rich man’s son, bringing some handy friends around for extra hands to work.
It sounds about as plausible as Agatha’s mutterings that they’re drug lords, so you nod along and watch your calico sneak up on your tuxedo behind her.
The garden is your own little retirement project. (You’re not actually retired, no matter what your sister snipes. But some smart money moves and a successful writing career is virtually the same with no kids and no spouse.) It’s going about as well as the renovations across the street - which is say, better and quicker than expected.
You planted clover in the yard, and are working on wildflowers in the boxes. The clover is already blooming, little flower tufts springing up for bumblebees to perch on. The wildflowers are mixed success so far, but nothing is dead yet.
You mostly just tootle around to be outside - allotted sunshine lest you become the shut in Bertram accused you of your first couple months.
The cats watch you pick at weeds from the window. Or two of them do. The other one is glaring from the fridge, angry that you tossed her back inside when she tried to slip past your ankles. (With any luck, you’ll have another sibling for them soon, but the handsome orange thing that keeps coming by at dawn and dusk is too stupid to be caught.) All three of them shift to look at something over your shoulder.
“Excuse.”
You don’t startle, thankfully. The voice may be unfamiliar, but neighbors stop by consistently enough that you’re not surprised to have your solitude interrupted.
What you are surprised by is the tall (very, very tall) man standing at the edge of your front yard. One of the renovators.
“Hi,” you say, straightening.
He points a gloved finger at you - no, not at you. Past you. At your cats.
“May I see them?” He asks in a thick German accent.
You blink, surprised and confused.
He’s a big man. Not just unusually tall, but broad as well. Muscle tugs at the fabric of his shirt, cargo pants clinging to his thighs. He also hasn’t bothered to take off the heavy duty dust mask, black sunglasses, or jacket hood obscuring his features. Looks like he’s about to rob you, honestly.
But Agatha’s uncharitable muttering about delinquent men rings like a warning toll. You’re at risk of sinking into the judgmental sea of upper-middle class suburbia, and that’s not water you want to tread.
“Sure!” You reply, ignoring his lack of introduction. “One sec.”
The cats see you dart from view and hurry to meet you at the door, meowing and yowling. You crack it open only wide enough to snatch up your precious firstborn, his leggies sticking out in abject bafflement at being airborne. You make guilty eye contact with your other two fiends before swiftly wedging the door shut again.
Then adjust your son, his little paws resting on your shoulder as you turn. Your visitor is standing right where you left him, perks up when he sees the cat bundled in your arms.
“This is Guy.”
You step closer, ignoring that shred of nervousness that being close to any man (especially one so physically intimidating) brings. To his credit, he only shuffles just enough to offer his hand for inspection.
“Guy?” he asks.
“I wasn’t going to adopt him at first, so I just called him Little Guy for so long that he thought that was his name. And then I did adopt him and now he won’t answer to anything else.”
You come by the rambling honestly - an obligate introvert until you moved to this neighborhood. There are few things you ever want to talk about with strangers, but your cats are one of them.
“He is a little guy,” the man muses.
Guy has no reservations about rubbing his fat face on the stranger’s glove, a purr kicking up in his chest. You relax as the man keeps his touch gentle and slow, that little bit of paranoid tension trickling into the soil beneath your feet.
“The other two aren’t as well behaved, I don’t trust them without harnesses on,” you add, nodding at the window.
The man glances up at them. Doesn’t seem to realize that his demise (and yours) is imminent from their glares.
“What are their names?”
You flush. “Rasputin and Shithead. I tell everyone else her name is Susan though.”
A sharp bark of laughter splits the air like a falling ax, cracks right down the middle. It makes you jump a bit - Guy is expectedly unbothered - but still you find yourself gratified. Laughing is good, it means you’re doing things right.
“Sorry,” he says, “but my friend would like that name.”
You gesture at the house across the street. “One of them?”
“Yes, the short one.”
You only just manage not to snort in amusement, but it doesn’t stop him from noticing. The mask moves, you think he might be grinning underneath.
“Does he know you call him that?”
“Not if you don’t tell him.”
You doubt you’ll have the opportunity even if you wanted to.
Someone’s at the door.
You’re only half-dressed, waist deep in laundry you have no excuse for putting off so long. Aren’t expecting company either - it’s Sunday morning, everyone should be at their various churches or visiting relatives. Can’t remember the last time someone knocked before noon on a Sunday.
Still, it was a big solid knock. The kind that makes you think it’s not the usual neighbor come by to impose on your space.
You glance down at the hem of your sweatshirt, determine it’s far enough down your thighs to be acceptable, and pad to the door.
You open it to another of the renovators. The “short” one - though you readjust that measurement quickly. He’s still taller than you, it’s just that most anyone seems diminutive compared to his friend.
“Morning,” you chime.
“We need your driveway.” His voice is low and rough, blunt. A sledgehammer to concrete. Also German-accented, you note.
“Oh,” you reply, “what for?”
He grunts. “Work.”
And you, a longtime observer of politely shaking people down for information by this point, smile without teeth.
“Oh, a work truck? It won’t make a mess will it?”
“No.”
You hum, glance at your stupid little sedan parked in the middle of the driveway.
“Okay, I’ll move — Shithead!”
You scramble to grab at the black and white blur of evil, sweeping her up in your arms as she meows in complaint. One of her back feet catches in the hem of your sweatshirt and starts to pull it up as she kicks. You curl an arm under her butt for support, but mostly she just takes the opportunity to chomp down on the meat of your thumb.
You glance at the man. “Shithead is very interested in the renovations.”
He stares. “So that is actually its name. I thought you were being rude and Konig didn’t realize.”
Ah, so that’s his name. You never did get that introduction.
“No, yeah, this is Shithead, I’m sure you can see why.”
The corner of his mouth twitches as she unlatches from your thumb, only to bite down on your wrist.
“So! The truck - when will it be here?”
“Noon.”
“Great! See you around!” You shut the door in his face without getting a name.
You threaten, not for the first time, to turn her into a pair of mittens. She responds by attacking your foot until Rasputin tackles her. Guy cries at the door, probably missing a man he met for all of two minutes.
The work truck stays through the night. Your cats spend all afternoon watching the men cross the street and back. Every once in a while, Guy puts his little feet up on the glass - Konig must be passing by.
You glance out the kitchen window only once and make hard eye contact with the third of their trio. He’s somehow even more covered up than Konig, and yet you get the distinct impression that your gaze is not welcome.
You blink and abandon the dishes for later.
The next morning, they’re already at it when you shuffle outside for the mail. Konig raises a slow hand in greeting, but visibly brightens when you smile sleepily and wave back.
You pass the work truck - the back panel is already open for them to unload wood beams and heavy-looking buckets. Construction stuff, as expected - and not messy, as promised.
You spot a red and white flag decal on the rear window. Austria, isn’t it?
“Did you just wake up?” a flat voice asks.
You squint a little through the morning sun at the man from the day before. The rude one.
You yawn. “Mhmm.”
He frowns at you, disapproval plain. Agatha will like him, you muse, shoving a hand in your mailbox. They both seem to have strong opinions about your sleep schedule.
“It is late.”
“It’s only 8.” You tug out a sheaf of envelopes and begin idly flipping through them.
“The sun is up.”
“So what?”
He clicks his tongue disdainfully. You absently click back. Then jump as a big body lands right in front of you. The third man, two wooden beams balanced on his shoulder. He makes brief eye contact with you again, then strides across the street.
“Shoo,” the rude one says. “Men at work, yes?”
You grumble. “See if I bring you cookies.”
Konig glances up from the truck bed, eyes shining. “Cookies?”
Well shit.
Rasputin keeps you company while you cook. He’s the only one allowed on the counter for any length of time. Shithead steals anything and everything, or bats at your hands while you work. Guy has the equal parts endearing and infuriating habit of touching everything with his paws.
Rasputin is the only one who will sit quietly to observe, leaning in for the occasional kiss. Today, he’s watching you bake cookies and assemble sandwiches. A dual-purpose welcome and peace offering to the three men across the street.
Is it too much? Maybe. But you’ve got nothing better to do and kindness won’t break your bank, so. Cookies and sandwiches.
You change clothes while the cookies cool on the pan - a sundress for the warm, late-spring weather. They’ve seen you in your pajamas far too much already.
At the door, you hesitate. This house doesn’t feel inhabited yet, but it also doesn’t feel right to just open the door. It’s quiet inside, so no power tools to drown you out. Making a face, you settle for a firm knock. It takes a minute or two - you think you might hear distant shouting. Then the door swings in fast and hard, nearly startling you.
It’s the third of their trio, the one you’ve yet to speak to. He’s covered head to toe, fabric around his head and face, leaving only sharp blue eyes to glare out.
“Hi,” you begin, hands thankfully too full to fidget. “I brought food.”
His eyes flick to the foil-covered platter in your hands. Then he swings the door wide and pivots on his heel.
“The cat comes too.”
Cat?
You glance down. Sure enough, Rasputin is standing by your legs, his remaining half a tail swishing. You sputter at him - didn’t even realize he snuck out - but all you get is his characteristic raspy “mah” noise. Right then.
He politely trots by your side as you enter, not even shy about your curiosity. The place is gutted, stripped walls and scuffed floors. It smells like dust and plaster and shaved wood. All the lights have been ripped out of the ceiling, exposing wires like nerve-endings.
There are two empty rooms to either side upon entry, a den and a dining room probably. The den even seems to be split into two, with one half sunk lower, accessible by a couple steps.
You follow your unexpected host through the “dining room,” which seems to be more of a satellite staging zone at the moment. There are piles of tools, stacks of materials, a little island of canvas bags. As you pass through, you notice a staircase, and even from the ground floor, you can see that it crosses over to the den on the other side.
The kitchen is stationed towards the back of the house. You try not to wince at the state of the counters. Pockmarked, blistered, scratched, burned, cracked laminate.
The floor has already been pried up to reveal smooth concrete. You scan it quickly for anything that could hurt Rasputin’s feet before entering.
Your neighbor gestures for you to set the platter down on an empty patch of counter, so you do, peeling back the foil.
“Cookies and sandwiches,” you explain just to have something to say.
“Why?” he asks.
You shrug. “To be nice.”
He stares. You blink back.
“I mean, you don’t have to eat them,” you add. “It would just be a waste.”
Rasputin chooses that moment to leap onto the counter, taking a moment to steady himself once he’s landed. With only one eye and a crooked leg, he’s not the most acrobatic or graceful of your babies, but he makes do.
To your shock, though, once he’s gained his bearings, he makes like he’s going to eat one of the sandwiches.
“Ras,” you gasp, surprised. “Absolutely not!”
The little shit doesn’t even resist when you nudge him away, just settles on his haunches, staring at your neighbor. And, to your confusion, your neighbor grunts.
“Konig! Krueger!” he barks.
That must be the rude one’s name. Krueger. You file that tidbit away.
“What’s your name?” You ask. “No one’s told me.”
He eyes you - dare you say suspiciously - letting the silence stretch.
“Nikto,” he rasps finally.
You finish introducing yourself just as the other two enter. Konig’s down to just the dust mask today, while Krueger seems to have donned one for himself.
“You,” Krueger says.
You arch your eyebrows back. “Me.”
“What brings you here?” Konig interjects, much friendlier.
“Well, you really seemed to want cookies yesterday, so I thought I’d bring some with lunch as a welcome to the neighborhood.”
He practically shoves Krueger to get to the kitchen. You politely get out of the way so he can indulge in your offering without getting trampled.
“Danke schön,” he says, scooping up a sandwich.
“No problem,” you answer, smiling.
Krueger deigns to sidle closer, inspecting the platter with a keen eye. Still, you think you see a bit of appreciation in them before he snatches up one of the sandwiches. For some (concerning) reason, you’re gratified by that. (You’ll just blame it on your habit of feeding ferals and strays.)
“I also wanted to give you three a little warning…” Three pairs of eyes pin you in place. You try not to grimace. “Everyone on this block is nosy as hell. They will literally peak in your yard and check your mail.”
“The mail?” Konig asks, appalled.
“Yeah, I started using a PO Box,” you sigh. You’ve only got so much sanity before you start taking sniper shots with a water gun.
“We will handle it,” Krueger says.
“I’m sure,” you demure. “Anyway, that was all. You can drop the platter off later - or I can come get it. It’s not like you’re far.”
You start looking for Rasputin, only to find him perched on Nikto’s broad shoulder. The man doesn’t even seem bothered by the claws digging through his shirt, scratching a finger at the calico’s cheek.
“Huh,” you say, surprised.
Nikto glances at you, pauses. “What?”
You snort at the bluntness, but grin. “Usually I’m the only one allowed to pet him.”
That’s three for three. Well, two and a half. Shithead could have been trying or escape or go for the ankles for all you know. But Krueger seemed to like her, so that counts for something.
“C’mon my little tank, let’s go,” you coo, approaching.
Rasputin nuzzles his face against Nikto’s once, gives him a parting mraw, then leaps into your waiting arms.
“Bye, guys!” You call, waving over your shoulder as you head for the door.
Konig is the only one to respond with a polite, “see you!” But you don’t take it to heart.
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#cod#thoughts™️#my writing#fanfiction#reader fic#dark fic#konig#konig x you#konig x reader#nikto x reader#sebastian krueger#krueger x reader#cod nikto#konig cod#neighbor!reader
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Wants and Needs
Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Joel x Reader
Summary: Bills are high; your dad’s boss wants to help. How you pay him stays between you and him—for now.
Warnings: 18+. Protected piv. Explicit power imbalance in an exchange of sex for money, so dubcon, technically. Soft dom!Joel. Sex toys. Squirting. Oral (f!receiving). Overstimulation. Daddy kink. Age gap. Praise kink.
Note: Bohanan’s is a steakhouse in San Antonio, TX.
Word count: 8.4k
You wanted a car. Joel needed to cum.
It wasn’t the arrangement a girl your age should’ve made, but what could you do? Your dad drank half of your college funds away, and your mom was long gone.
The next best thing was Mr. Miller, your father’s boss. He’d understood better than anyone what money could buy. What it might do. For him, it was pleasure. For you, it was a future—or what little remained after bills and loans and exorbitantly-priced car repairs bled you dry.
You took the job at the firm on a whim. You didn’t want to be a lawyer anymore, though your dad and Joel were. You didn’t want to be done with law school, though 3L had already long since ended, and that dreaded so-called ‘minimum competency’ test was drawing close on the horizon. In short, you couldn’t afford to pay for bar prep.
With Joel, you could.
It was true that tax law paid pretty well, but a part-time job would never really be enough when your family was treading water at all times. Your dad liked to gamble and drink, and your brothers got all of their brains from him.
You got the short end of the stick, plus the receiving end of another. Lucky for you, Joel’s felt pretty good going in.
Today you were somewhere south of Austin. Your truck wouldn’t start last week, so you’d agreed to come along on this business trip knowing full well what you planned on asking your boss as soon as you had a moment alone.
“CDP hearing at…9:45.” You checked the itinerary twice.
“Alright.” Joel nodded.
“Lunch with Javier, Ezra, and Dave at twelve.”
“Mhmm.”
“Phone call with Revenue Officer Acacius at 3:30.”
“For the…?”
“Martells.”
“Okay.”
“I finished Lucien Flores’ Form 433-F for your review and left notes—” You stopped to tap your finger on a short white pile of papers between you and Joel on the desk, “—in the margins. Still need bank statements from him.”
“Lovely.”
Joel eyed the stack at first, but his gaze strayed a little.
“You should probably plan to talk strategy with my dad before Mayor Garcia’s audit tomorrow, too. Looks like a couple non-cash contributions are being disputed now.”
For a second, your eyes flitted up to him, too. It was brief.
“Sure. When’s your daddy free?” he said.
You blinked, then scanned the schedule.
“Looks like five…or six, maybe. He’s got a consult with—”
“I wasn’t talking about your father.”
You looked back up. Joel was smirking, of course. His hand had drifted a comfortable, innocent distance past the papers and across the table, to you. The pair of you happened to be in one of the glass-paneled conference rooms nearest the hotel lobby, so he had to be discreet.
He never let his fingers stray too long on yours in public. Presently, his thumb grazed your knuckles extra slow.
Posing a question, maybe.
You didn’t have the time to be tactful now, unfortunately.
“I need $2,700.”
Joel, your boss, your daddy, whatever, had to pause at that. He didn’t move his hand immediately, but he did stare harder. Longer. He searched your face for the joke.
“$2,700?” he repeated.
“Yes sir,” you answered out of habit, wincing only a little, “My truck stopped running last week, and it’s just…a lot.”
The cost. For Joel, it wasn’t even a drop in the bucket, but in your world, it was a make-or-break, fuck-your-whole-budget-for-the-next-six-months kind of bad. Suddenly, your cheeks felt warmer than they did before, and you forced yourself to look away. Peering out across the wide and gently rolling terrain of San Antonio and trying to pretend there was something thrilling to see. You’d almost forgotten how much you hated asking this.
“I can make the deposit tonight—” Joel started.
“No,” you interrupted. You wanted to turn but couldn’t. You just shook your head and kept staring out there, “Not now, I mean…I need to earn it over time, I just…”
You stumbled over the words. It was like your lips, your tongue, and your teeth were all suffering from the same sort of embarrassment pervading the brain, and you couldn’t bring your mouth to form the sentences right.
I’m not asking for a handout. I need to earn the money.
However ‘earning’ may have been grossly misconstrued in the context, it was a labor all the same. You didn’t love it, but you didn’t hate him, either. Joel was nice, albeit old enough to be your father, and it didn’t seem that he was nearly as predatory or perverse as he could’ve been. You’d been working for him for two months now, and the idea had been your own when the cash had gotten tight.
Back in April, you’d explained to him, calmly, that you couldn’t take the bar exam unless you got some extra money quick. That you wouldn’t accept his charity, but you’d pay him back in other ways. Joel had been against it at first—you were the daughter of his best friend, after all—but eventually, his carnal needs won out over his sense, as every other man would’ve done, you guessed.
At first, you’d started slow, but that hadn’t lasted very long. You fucked him regularly now, though never had you asked for an amount of cash this big out of nowhere.
Joel blinked and put a hand on his hip, like he always did when he wasn’t sure what to say. The silver in his soft, dark locks shone more in this light. He’d lost the smirk.
“You’ve done…plenty.” Now sounding sheepish.
You tried to protest again; Joel stopped you.
“I mean it. Hey, look at me,” he said next.
You did, hesitatingly. You turned from the window, and out of instinct, folded your arms over your chest. Joel paced closer to you and then he was watching. Pausing.
Brushing your arm with his and glancing once over your shoulder to make sure no one else was around to see.
He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your temple.
When he pulled away, your skin was practically ablaze.
“Mr. Miller—”
“Joel,” he corrected, quiet, “And you’ve done enough. Let me cover the car just this once, okay? Sweetheart?”
You didn’t realize you were pivoting again. That your gut was doing somersaults and your heart was ready to climb up and out of your throat. Your neck was burning.
It wasn’t even anger you sensed was simmering under the skin until you turned back to him, and your eyes flashed with ire before the words were even spoken.
“I don’t need your pity, Mr. Miller. I said I want to pay.”
“It’s Joel. And I said you’ve done enough, so—”
Ire morphed to something more in a blink.
You didn’t mean to say it, but you did.
“Fine,” you huffed, suddenly exasperated, “If you’re so fucking opposed to me paying my way for this one simple thing, I’ll get another guy. Forget I asked.”
It was a low blow, for sure. Joel knew how badly you’d wanted this to stay between just you and him—and he would never dream of seeing you ‘earning your keep’ with anyone else. His expression said as much as soon as he’d heard your words; his whole face hardened at once.
But then you’d turned to leave. You didn’t care what he wanted to tell you, and if you did, you certainly weren’t brave enough to stick around to hear Joel say it then.
So you left. He had a full, busy day ahead of him anyway.
You woke up wet.
In an effort to avoid your boss, you’d run errands all day. Buried your nose in a sea of Civil Procedure notes as soon as you got a second alone, almost vomited seeing the Erie Doctrine, and went back to your hotel room to try and study there. Once you had, you napped instead.
Now your clothes stuck to your skin; the sheets around you were soaked. You peered over the big white duvet holding your body interred and saw smoke overhead.
Or steam.
Yes, definitely steam. It was drifting from the bathroom, where the door was thrown open. You shifted up to sit.
“Tess!” you yelled, “Shut the goddamn door, I’m boiling.”
As a law clerk, you weren’t afforded the luxury of a suite to yourself, so you shared it with the other new grads on work trips like these. Tess Servopoulos loved long, hot showers and never closed the fucking door. You groaned.
And, feeling depleted of all energy from your studies and the stress and the steam searing every inch of your skin, you flopped back in the bed. You kicked the covers off your legs. You’d just lifted a hand to wipe the sweat from your forehead, when an awful, fresh realization dawned.
You glanced at the clock—3:37.
“Fucking hell,” you hissed.
You were supposed to meet your dad at two to get some paperwork signed. You needed to have that filed with the court by four. He was probably engaged somewhere else by now, whether it be a client, a conference, or a couple white lines in the bathroom of a partners-only club downtown, and you wouldn’t have a hope of reaching him here. You rubbed your face and groaned again.
You’d set an alarm for 1:30—you knew you had.
Where the hell was your phone? Why was it so warm? What if he’d called? Aw fuck, he’s probably blown that thing up to hell and back by now. Maybe he was drunk. He had to be. Where was Tess? Where were your pants?
You’d made it up to your feet, clumsily, and faced a full-length mirror. Your bottoms were gone. You closed your eyes and screamed inside, remembering why they were.
“Glad you’re getting some use out of this.”
The second you heard it, your lids flew open. You turned.
And, standing in the warm yellow glow of the bathroom light—holding the culprit, your vibrator, like a prize—was Joel. Naked as the day he was born, save for one thin towel around his hips, and grinning. Moisture glistened on his chest and pooled about his feet, and his hair was smooth, tamed, and combed back neatly from his face.
He waved your silicone toy in the air, and immediately, you regretted giving him your room key the other day.
“I thought we agreed you’d wait for me—”
“What the hell are you doing here?”
Your voice was thick with sleep. Joel’s own was slow, dulcet, and kind as it always was, even when teasing. When you grit your teeth, he just set the toy aside.
“I’m sorry. Bad timing. I saw your—”
“No.” You threw up both hands at once, suddenly out of breath and fucks to give, “You know what? I don’t care. You need to go. I have to be down at the courthouse—”
In twenty minutes. You cut yourself short and hurried off to find shoes. You could wear other pants. Ask another attorney to sign the forms if you couldn’t reach your dad. Forget that his boss and yours had just caught you with the vibrator he’d bought you last month and try not to feel too humiliated knowing he knew what you’d been doing. It didn’t matter—Joel didn’t matter. You slid on a mismatched pair of slacks and set off toward the door.
Then you had to stop. Joel beat you there, quick as ever.
“Listen. Hey.”
“Will you stop?!”
You pushed at his big and wet, stupidly broad chest. You felt the small grey hairs on his pecs tickle your palms, and for a second, you thought you heard a chuckle.
“You’re gonna make me late—”
“Hey, hey,” Joel said again. Of course it sounded fatherly, “I already signed the POA for Morales, hon, you’re good.”
You’re good.
“You what?” You stared at him in disbelief. How did he even know you needed Frankie’s power of attorney signed in the first place? You figured your dad would’ve mentioned it, but still, it wasn’t really Joel’s form to sign.
“The case is mine now,” he clarified, reading that look, “Wasn’t my first pick, but it is what it is. And your dad—”
Your dad was probably lagging wildly behind on his own caseload, so he’d pushed one off on his friend. Again.
“You can’t keep picking up his slack,” you gritted out, “One of these days it’s gonna bite you both in the ass. You know he shouldn’t be forcing these jobs on you.”
“I offered.”
“You caved.”
“He’s my best friend, what do you expect me to do?”
“Not let him use you! He’s making you feel bad for him.”
“And what if I did? What if I did pity the bastard?”
You scoffed. Then winced, inwardly.
I don’t need your pity, Mr. Miller.
From the look on Joel’s face, he seemed to be remembering the same. He shook his head.
“That’s not…” he trailed off. He rubbed his jaw with his hand and started to move from the door, deflating some.
His other arm extended to you, wordlessly, and already anticipated what was sure to follow. You swatted him off, then walked to the bed. You considered sitting but didn’t. Instead, you crossed your arms like you always did and turned away, facing the window with a cool, flat affect.
By now, Joel knew better than to take that for what it seemed. He crossed the room to you, treading softly.
His voice turned gentle again, like an apology: “Honey…”
But your gaze was already fixed outside. You frowned.
“Darlin’,” Joel continued, undeterred, “Come on.”
And you didn’t need to see his face to hear the rest: ‘Look at me, please,’ with eyes all comfort and warmth.
“Don’t you have a phone call with an R.O. or something?” Briefly, you recalled Acacius and a stream of other items from the checklist you’d covered that morning, and you had to stop yourself then from straying too far. You blinked once, just as Joel was approaching from behind.
“I cancelled,” he said.
You sighed, “Mr. Miller…”
You knew he hated doing that.
“Joel,” he pressed. Adding, “Something came up.”
You wouldn’t even ask. You shouldn’t care. You felt him standing there, fanning hot breaths across the nape of your neck, and you really couldn’t have taken that worse. You visibly tensed, hands balling into fists at your sides, and—hell, he wouldn’t quit moving now, would he?—Joel bent down. He hesitated, as if gauging your reaction in time, then descended further. He kissed your shoulder.
You cracked; it never took much from him.
For all your inane, ancillary plays at feigning indifference, one movement of Joel’s mouth and your resolve was lost. You clung to words, weakly, but all the rest fell away.
“We don’t…want your charity. Me or my dad. Alright?”
“I know.”
Joel kissed your skin again, then pulled at the strap of your blouse. It fell limply away, and his lips reattached.
Exactly when he’d walked you back to the bed, you couldn’t be sure. By the third or fourth kiss, your stomach was tight, knees weak, and your eyes drawing closed; it didn’t matter to you or to him what had passed before. Your bodies found the bed and blended together.
Tangling, in a way. Tearing blindly at clothes and not saying too much apart from Joel’s soft, sweet words:
“That’s it.”
“I know.”
“Good girl.”
Good girl when he kissed you. Good girl when he stripped you bare. Good girl when his hands roamed the broad, naked expanse of your body and let your own do the same to him. Good girl when your fingers hooked the outline of the towel and tugged it away, your vision filled with a sight you’d come to like more and more each day.
“That’s my girl,” Joel murmured. He cradled your head while you gripped his base, “‘S’yours, baby. All yours.”
Yours. Mine. You weren’t sure you had the sense or self-possession to even know what that meant, especially here. Joel wasn’t a boyfriend. He wasn’t a lover, at least not in the traditional sense. He wore dark wool suits like your father and worked from dawn until dusk every day, practicing law for longer than you’d been alive. Still, the smile above you was sweet. It coaxed you gently as you slid your hand up and down his length, like he sensed this was more like a lesson for you. Learning experience.
“Remember, spit a little first,” he instructed. Then, to demonstrate this point, he brought his fingers to his mouth and wet them quickly. He slipped his touch down to yours and met your gaze while he joined you there.
He rubbed and slicked himself up and he did it with ease. You followed his lead and watched his face contort—crow’s feet pinching even tighter at the sides of his eyes as pleasure began to pool in his gut. He looked pretty. You’d never thought to tell him this, but Joel really had an unparalleled face. It was an old and beautiful thing. For this reason, you couldn’t bring yourself to tear your gaze away, maybe to wet your own fingers. Instead, you slipped your hand between your legs, where his hips had come to rest. You worked a slow, light touch against your folds; you were drenched, and it didn’t take long for your fingers to be, too. You moved them back to Joel’s cock.
“Like this?” you ventured.
The man answered with a grunt, at first. Then a grin.
“Yeah. Yeah,” Joel nodded, quiet but emphatic. Trying not to smile too big as he let your touch take over for his, “Just like that, sweet pea. Get it nice an’ wet for daddy.”
You wanted to whimper at that. Something must’ve flashed in your eyes at the intonation of the last word, and the look must’ve suffused your whole expression, because the next thing you knew, Joel was lowering his body to yours. Petting your hair, letting you rub on his shaft as fast as your soft, lithe hands could manage.
“Feel that, baby? Feel how much daddy missed you?”
You did.
Your brow pinched, and you wanted more of that. More from him: those tender, edifying words of praise being mumbled your way while your touch worked him over. Maybe you could’ve helped it, but then again, in this state, maybe you couldn’t—you whimpered for him.
Wriggling your hips against the bed to get your warmth pressed flush with his own, and squeezing him tighter:
“In me, daddy. Please.”
You angled his cock in your trembling grip to plead as much. You knew he liked being the one to push in the first time, so you didn’t move too far with that push, but you begged him with your gaze. You felt him tense a bit.
And just when you sensed he might let you have your way, he moved off. Down. Sliding his torso away from your own, to go lower on the bed, and smirking again.
“I think she needs my tongue first, doesn’t she?”
You wanted to nod. Instead, you flinched. You crawled away from his hold before it could secure itself firmly on either one of your legs, and you had to snag your bottom lip between your teeth to contain that blossoming need. It almost spilled from your mouth in a moan before Joel’s could reach your lower half. Then you scrambled to sit up
“No,” you choked out.
This wasn’t new. While you shook your head, Joel lifted a brow and stood from the bed. He reached behind him.
The night stand.
You closed your eyes.
“This isn’t…supposed to be for me.” you sighed.
In a second, Joel was back where he started, and you didn’t have to steal a glance through your lids to know what he was holding. Slotting himself gently into place.
“Don’t,” he started, sharp, “—say that. I mean it.”
You knew he meant it, but you also knew better than to accept at face value what he said, moving down on you.
This wasn’t part of the deal. Joel’s money was meant to serve his pleasure, not yours. Letting him take you any other way seemed to blur the lines between transaction and affection, and though you’d done this before, it still didn’t feel right. You couldn’t bear having his focus here.
Evidently, though, he could. He’d snatched your vibrator from the night table and lowered his torso to your legs, lips twitching the tiniest bit. ‘Open up. Let me see her.’
Joel was on his stomach, eyes glowing with intrigue.
“Let me see how much she’s missed me, baby.”
The grey matter in your brain might’ve trickled through your ears—the whole thing went to mush at his words. You pushed at his hands, then the top of his head, but clearly, your will was weak. You wanted this. Needed it.
“That’s a good girl. Let daddy have it,” Joel drawled.
You wanted to cry. Or maybe hide. His index and middle fingers prodded at your folds, pulling them apart, and for a moment, you could’ve sworn you’d stopped breathing. Joel kissed the slope of your mound with a quiet kind of reverence. The salt-and-pepper stubble on his chin brushed your clit, and your back arched reflexively. Then, remembering why you’d come to this arrangement in the first place, you felt a wave of guilt supplant that pleasure.
You clawed at his head and shook your own, weakly.
“No. W-wanna make you feel good,” you choked out.
Not me.
Not here.
Just let it—
“Fuck,” you keened through your teeth. Joel’s lips made contact with your slick, drooling cunt and, in a second, sucked your nub in between them. He flicked his tongue.
Joel groaned, then pulled away to meet your gaze.
“Feels plenty good f’me,” he assured you in a murmur. Eyes glossy, “She’s so fuckin’ sweet, honey. So pretty.”
Then, as if to punctuate his point, he slid his tongue down the whole wet mess of your slit, and he moaned. He curled the muscle and invaded your sticky, sensitive, precious warm flesh with vigor and force—maybe a little desperation—and you whined at the feeling. Your toes curled tight. It was doubtlessly a sight to see: Joel’s old and weathered head against your young and supple skin, the wiry greys of his chin rubbing your cunt like no man’s his age should’ve been. He took you gently. Forked his fingers over your folds to hold you open for him and then, over and over and over again, just licking stripes. Squelching noises only seemed to goad him on while he buried his nose and savored your taste without reserve. Your stomach clenched with that pleasure, then swelled.
“That’s my girl—so good for me,” Joel said, as though reminding you, gently, it was okay to relish the feeling.
Once more, he suckled your clit in his mouth, rubbing the tip of his tongue in a quick back-and-forth motion, and the next sensation hit without a breath of warning.
Your belly twisted again, then flushed with hot pleasure.
“My— fuck,” you cried, shuddering with a climax you didn’t know was coming. You held his head and whined.
Joel’s tongue didn’t stop. Your vision blurred. Whatever reprieve you might’ve hoped to find came in the form of his lips drawing back, momentarily, only to sponge little kisses on your still-pulsing heat. Your body jolted back.
“I c— I’m done. I’m done,” you blurted out.
Joel nodded against you. Humming through his kisses:
“I know. Keep going.”
Keep going.
So simple.
Still, you couldn’t breathe. Your sight was inundated with stars. You felt Joel’s stubble on your slit again, only this time, the pleasure was tripled. Your legs trembled, and your hands made fists in his hair. Joel kept on kissing.
And kissed again, again, and again, until your fingers in his locks pulled taut to the roots and your hips were bucking up in his face: ‘Too much, t—oh fuckfuckfuck.’
Then came a buzz. Skirting your legs in a blink, before diving to meet Joel’s mouth on your clit. You shrieked.
“I know, I know,” Joel joined, as though soothing a wound while he maneuvered the vibrator. Lifting his head and then kissing your thigh, “I know. You’re alright.”
You wanted to sob; you felt ready to burst. You trusted Joel’s judgment but had never been subjected to this sort of pleasure. What if it was more than you could take?
“I’m here.”
Joel’s words were slow to crawl off his tongue, but their intent was clear. You writhed once more, and he was kissing your skin, rubbing your thighs, and taking the toy to your clit with a warm, devoted touch. He wasn’t cruel.
He had a glint in his gaze when you met it, like he knew you wouldn’t accept this feeling alone—but he wanted you to. He wanted the indulgence to be your own and an end in itself. There was care in his touch, tender praise with every caress, and you guessed this was intentional. Joel needed you to know this was more than only his.
You felt more naked than you’d ever been: soaking the sheets with your last release, fresh arousal trickling out, Joel’s spit mixing with your nectar and sweat and pressing you down in the bed. And nudging you, gently.
“‘S’okay, baby. You’re alright. That feels nice, doesn’t i—”
“Kiss me.”
It came out faster than you could even try and stop it. You weren’t sure why you said it. The words were acerbic on your tongue—you hated ever sounding needy—but then your mind and your mouth and your worries were all silenced at once when Joel came clambering up for you.
His lips were wet and grinning as he kissed you. He held the vibrator hostage between your legs while his body pressed tight against yours. His movements slowed.
Then, as if he’d crawled in your head and read your mind:
“It’s okay to need me, baby. It’s okay to want this.”
His hips made that assurance even clearer. Joel reached down and took the vibrator again, increasing the friction between your groin and his while he pressed the buzzing toy to your clit. You whined into his mouth at the feeling.
Your eyes rolled back, and the pleasure soared. This morning, you might’ve bristled at the words he’d just spoken, but here, in this bed, it felt okay. It felt safe.
Joel felt safe, for once, and you weren’t sure how to keep that idea from sticking—how to reconcile the notion of swapping sex for cash with a man for months on end, and then this. Your stomach churned. He held your face and kissed you more, and your clit throbbed and ached. Before you could ponder your thoughts a second longer, a white-hot pleasure washed over, and you came again.
“Good girl,” Joel cooed.
Throbbing even more this time.
“That’s a sweet girl. That’s my baby.”
All but aching with desire. Feeling it double.
“Cum for daddy, that’s it. Keep going.”
Feeling it trickle down your legs.
“She’s feelin’ real good, huh?”
You could barely breathe.
You whined. Felt something splinter between your thighs and then more of it, more of you and that slick, oozing pleasure and Joel’s groans, overjoyed—‘Making a fucking mess’a daddy, isn’t she? She feel that good?’—and by ‘that good’ you guessed it was more than normal.
This was more warmth than usual. Somewhere in the midst of your own mind-numbing pleasure, you’d let out a spurt, sticky and wet. It now coated the hairs on Joel’s tummy, and while his skin shone, his eyes were brighter. He flitted a look to you, gaze flaring, and slid down. Low.
Back to where he was before. Moving the buzzing pink bullet aside and letting his mouth assume its place.
Of course, you yelped.
“Joel!”
You winced, both from saying his name and feeling so raw. Joel grinned at the sound and suckled your clit.
It was drenched. You and Joel, too, were doused all over and practically gleaming under the rays of late afternoon sun then pouring through the window. For a second, you cast a look outside like you had before, but it was only to brace your body for the bliss at hand. You stared and felt a crude, carnal shockwave seize you head to toe. It traveled fast and made you release, again, or else just continue the same flow as before—and this time, into Joel’s waiting mouth. He lapped at you feverishly now.
He squeezed your legs and licked you dry. He worked in merciless circles, like his life might have depended on making you stay at this peak. All the while, you were tearing at his hair. Riding his face as your body fell apart.
That was alright. This pleasure was yours for now, but there was still time yet to make it worth his while, you reasoned in a half-intoxicated state. Your legs vibrated as you started to crawl—limp—back up in the bed and, numb with elation and a desperate need to please, you stretched your arm toward the night stand. You huffed.
You reached blindly but got it. The box. Weak fingers found the first plastic strip and tore yourself a square. Then, lifting it to Joel, you ignored the last stabs of pleasure between your legs. This was fun, but still his.
“Go on,” you told him, breathless, “Fuck me.”
Joel quirked a brow. He took the condom, still panting himself. He brought the latex to his tip out of habit, then:
“Yeah? Are you sure?”
“Uh-huh.”
Your head was swimming. Somewhere entrenched in the furthest recesses of your brain you could feel it, that dizzying, self-centered pleasure. You pushed it back.
You suffocated it, and you spread your legs wide for him. You let him lay you down and tug the rubber over his cock, then nudge at your hips to situate himself in just the right way. How he liked it. He seemed to be content, and your heart swelled. In this airy, buoyant state, you felt more at ease to speak, sure that he’d understand.
“This should cover some of it, right?” you panted out.
Joel slowed.
“What?”
You sucked your bottom lip between your teeth, eager to keep going. But you steeled yourself, just barely, then.
“Sex. Now,” you said, “It’ll cover some of my car repairs.”
Instead of nodding like you’d expected, Joel only blinked. Then you opened your mouth to speak again, and his body stopped you cold. He planted a hand beside your head on the pillow and raised his hips; you felt his heat leave with it. You reached for his backside immediately, to try and pull him back into that pre-missionary position he’d held, when Joel brushed you off. His face was hard.
“Money?” he quipped.
“Yeah,” you started, then remembered how you talked outside of the bedroom, when he seemed more serious, “We’ll go again. All week. You can even put it in my—”
Joel balked, like you’d just slapped him across the face.
“No,” he said, sharp.
“No,” he repeated, more to himself this second time. Almost as though he couldn’t believe what you were suggesting—and making him guilty by association.
Joel clenched your pillow like a vice and shook his head.
“You’re not getting paid for this,” he finished, and when your gaze penetrated his, confused, he squeezed harder.
“Thought you wanted it.” Joel added, almost shamefully.
“I do! I do…I just—” you sputtered.
“What? Think you need to offer up a week and a half of fucking to make it worth my time? Is that what this is?”
Well, in a way, maybe.
You weren’t sure what to say. Former dizzying bliss was dwindling fast, and now you were facing him cold. Sober.
Increasingly irritated, again.
“I just need money, Mr. Miller—”
“It’s Joel, hon,” he bit back, for the fourth time that day. His eyes flared with something more, maybe annoyance, but then he was tempering it just as fast. He ran a hand through his damp grey hair and shook his head, pausing, “It’s Joel. I know you need the money, baby, but it’s—”
“It’s what we agreed,” you protested, “What I need—”
“Well it’s not what I want!” Joel barked.
Anger surged again, and this time, evidently, the feeling was harder to keep at bay. He was scarcely able to rein in his features, settling on a grave little scowl instead of a frown, and he sucked in shorter, shallower breaths through his nose. You felt him let your pillow go.
“Forget it—the cash.” Joel grit his teeth even tighter, “Forget these payments and the goddamn allowance I’ve had you on. I can’t do that anymore. It’s not right.”
Your heart sank.
You didn’t know what to say.
Luckily, Joel’s voice resumed on its own.
“Whatever you want, whatever you need, sweetheart…”
He stopped. Silence followed, then stretched on for one full, terrible minute. In that interim, you could see his chest rise and fall fast. He was trying to slow it down.
“Whatever you need paid off, I’ll do it. Anything. You don’t have to touch me again. It was wrong of me to allow that in the first place,” he rejoined, tone cooling.
Sounding guilty, too.
Above you, Joel didn’t seem keen on holding your gaze, so he fixed his stare someplace on the headboard instead. Then he moved off your body, slowly.
In spite of the distance he attempted to give, he was still crowding your space. Looming large and bare and weary as you’d ever seen him, knees shuffling back awkwardly through a mass of cotton sheets while his eyes shifted low. Away. The rest of him filled your lungs with a heady cologne scent and your stomach with a thousand tiny blades—you were hurt that he wasn’t sticking to his end of the bargain. You were mad that he was trying to claim the moral high ground now, after everything you’d done.
Mostly, though, you were just upset that you felt like you were losing someone close. That Joel Miller was more of a confidant, friend, and father figure than your own dad had ever been, and that got all fucked up over money. Your lips pursed, and something stung behind your eyes when you reached for him again. Your throat stung, too.
“The reason I agreed to do this,” Joel went on, and the ache in your head worsened when he winced from your touch, “was ‘cause I didn’t want you getting ‘help’ from anyone else. I was selfish. And that’s not an excuse…”
He started to move off, hand dropping from yours.
“…but it’s the truth. I’m sorry.”
At length, Joel found your gaze, and the eyes said it all over again: I’m sorry. You might’ve believed them, too.
But you were you, and you couldn’t help but press:
“Why?”
Your voice was small. Joel was trying to stand from the bed, but you grabbed at his hand again and made him meet your eyes. Confusion was painted across his own.
Kneeling in front of him, curious, you tried to clarify.
“Why’d it have to be you?”
Judging from Joel’s expression as soon as you did, you got the sense that this question made him feel dumb. He frowned, but he held your stare and answered anyway.
“Because I wanted you first,” he replied, “Before all this.”
Your stomach twisted. He did?
You didn’t need to ask twice to know what that meant. What he’d said, in words and with a look, was enough. Still, it was always in you to know more, to be sure, so you crept a little closer. You let your hands roam up and—
“No,” Joel said, as soon as your fingers reached his side.
You’d just wanted to feel him, maybe prod him further on what he’d just said through acts that didn’t require verbal articulation, but he refused. He backed up in bed.
“This isn’t about—” he started, low.
“Sex. I know,” you answered for him. Then your touch grazed his thigh, and you were dying to have more. To be told in a way you both knew and understood. To touch, “You want me to believe you really…liked me before?”
“More than you know.”
There was that blunt, open pragmatism in the Joel you’d always known. Perhaps guided by natural inclinations, or else your hand on his leg, drawing higher. Moving closer.
Showing skepticism through your eyes and the hint of a playful, disbelieving smile starting to curl at your lips.
“When you met me?” you teased.
You’d known of Joel for years, and had met him a couple times as a teenager at various firm holiday functions. You probably hadn’t exchanged more than ten words altogether before starting law school a few years back.
“Hell no,” Joel answered, fast, “When you started work.”
His gaze was timid again. It was fixed on his thigh where you’d started to slide your index up the warm, muscled expanse of his skin, and though you could tell he was more than hesitant, you wanted to know. Wanted to feel.
It wasn’t so easy convincing a man you’d been working for—and fucking, largely without feeling—to pay bills that you wanted him here and now. But you needed to try.
That maybe, somewhere along the way, you’d come to want him, too. That cash wasn’t the only thing at stake.
You crawled between his legs, then straddled his hips.
Your lips smiling still as you did: “How much?”
Joel blinked back. Dazed.
“What do you m—”
“How much did you like me? When did it start?”
Joel sighed when your heat rubbed his. He tried grabbing ahold of your hips, when you glanced down and saw he’d already discarded the last condom. You couldn’t have that if you wanted to continue this talk.
You reached back and grabbed another.
“Darlin’,” Joel said, strained, “We shouldn’t…”
“Says who?”
You’d already worked the rubber halfway down his length when his heavy-lidded gaze locked with yours. You saw lust there, mixed with worry. Curiosity. You kept going.
“Says your dad, if he ever finds out what I’ve done to his little girl,” Joel replied, closing his eyes at the feeling.
You had the latex worked down to the base of him when you smiled. Felt him seize your hips, lids fluttering open to find you in their soft, glossy stare, and you felt better. Like clockwork, you went together and joined, at last. You felt Joel squeeze your backside and groan when you first sank down to take him whole. You shuddered, too.
But you tried to steady your voice as you spoke.
“Semantics, Miller,” you told him, only faltering a little, “Things you are ‘doing’ to his little girl. Not just ‘done.’”
There, you had a point. Surely your father would have had some choice words for his business partner and best friend if he knew how far Joel’s cock was currently stuffed inside your tight, wet cunt. It might even piss him off, if he weren’t too drunk to receive the news himself.
Joel blinked hard, signaling that he knew this too, and presently watched your body swallow all eight inches at once, after you’d raised yourself up to just the tip and sank back. Your ass fell to his groin with an obscene sort of squelch, and your walls involuntarily clenched. You both let out sounds of pleasure, and held on tighter.
Your hands on his chest for stability, while one of his own held your hip and the other fumbled around for your clit, gliding through the sheen of your arousal on his front. You rocked your hips and felt how much it really was—how you’d drenched his whole abdomen with your last release. You smiled at this and stared, pleased with the pretty, sticky display you’d laid bare all over Joel’s belly.
When Joel wasn’t watching you ride, he stared there too.
“Not so ‘little’ anymore,” he mused quietly. Then he looked up to find your eyes, seeing them as glazed as his, “And I ‘like’ you, hon. Present tense. Not just…‘liked.’”
Alright.
“How much?”
You wanted to say it with some confidence. Nonchalance. Then Joel’s cock nicked a particularly sensitive ridge inside your walls, and that thought was gone as quick as it had come. You gripped the flesh of his upper chest and rolled your hips harder. Let out your breaths in little fractured whimpers while you rode him more. Another sweet feeling twisted low in your gut.
With just a glimpse of that, Joel moved his hand from your heat up past your hips and waist, to squeeze one of your breasts. His fingers were wet. You could feel them, equal parts warmth and wanton yearning as the pads pinched your nipple and gave it a firm tug. He grunted.
Clearly, there was more to it than just the touching and feeling for him—Joel’s eyes drank in the sight of your skin as it glistened with the arousal he’d just smeared. He thumbed at the wet, stiff peak and swallowed. And, just as you were about to adjust the rhythm of your hips bouncing on him, his free hand joined the first and pulled you down. You cried feeling his cock wedge deep; your hands fell to either side of his body when he yanked your face down to his. He fucked up into you from underneath
You squealed, soft, “Joel!”
He kissed your open mouth. Made you lay flat overtop him while he fucked your dripping hole. You whimpered.
“Joel—” Again.
“I like you so much, sweetheart,” he said, in answer to your last question, lips close, “Does she like me too?”
As if to save him the trouble of a swift reply in words, your body told him instead. You squeezed around his cock, and with another desperate cry, bit his shoulder. He hammered your poor, aching pussy with a groan of his own, and he held your body down to his. Grinning.
Kissing the side of your head while he pounded away. Stroking your hair, “Is that a ‘yes’? She like her daddy?”
Drool was bound to slip out of your mouth any second. Your lips were locked in a permanent ‘o’ while he drilled from under you on the bed. Still, you managed to nod.
“Uh-huh—oh, fuck, fuck, da-ddy. Yes, daddy.”
You squeezed your eyes shut as another blistering wave seared your insides. Joel was relentless with his thrusts now, driving himself in and out without stopping or slowing. He must’ve known you were close. He was too, judging by the sounds of his grunts and hushed tone.
“Let daddy take care of her then, baby. All of her. OK?”
His words trickled through your ear as sweet as honey. His cock was less kind, but that was okay—you liked it.
You loved him here. Taking care of you. Her. Everything.
And, in this half-coherent state of fuckdrunk pleasure, you were tempted to give in to whatever he begged.
It would be so easy. Joel cradled your face in his hand, practically beaming with pride while he fucked you over and over, and your legs were spread, walls were stretched, eyes practically rolling back, and you felt more secure than you’d been in ages. Joel could care for you.
He rubbed his thumb over your cheek and hummed.
“Daddy’s got you,” he said, voice all warm assurance.
Nudging you closer and closer to your peak—and perhaps some other form of surrender. Release.
Submission?
Joel wouldn’t be so bad for that.
He could fuck you well and leave you content. Make you forget what it meant to be strapped for cash and saddled with guilt and worry over bills every month. Joel could provide, for now. His eyes said as much; his fingers threaded through your hair and rubbed your scalp. He cupped your face, all fifty-six years in his own looking as handsome as they’d ever been. He felt good. He felt safe.
You were hot. Your legs trembled and ached.
“Is that something you’d want?” he pressed.
And, still holding Joel’s gaze with a heavy-lidded, fucked out look of your own, you surprised yourself by nodding, slowly. Your body was spent, but the curve on your lips, then his, was sincere; Joel nodded back as he grinned.
“Yeah? You mean it, sweetheart?”
He flipped you both over and got on top, never breaking apart. You wound your legs around his back and let him cup your cheeks again, and from this angle, you felt it. You wouldn’t try and fight it now; you just kissed him.
Then you came for a third time, walls clenching and squeezing and gushing again, smearing Joel’s front as he fucked you right through it. His groans were a little more subdued than yours, but in their timbre, you could hear his desperation. He emptied himself inside you, in the condom, and kept holding your face all the while.
You felt a low pulse between your legs. Then another. And another. And another. Joel’s hips began to still, his hefty greying belly bumping lightly against your skin while he drained what was left in his balls, and you swore that his bones might’ve creaked from the sheer force of those final thrusts. He seemed exhausted. Somehow, though, the man looked even better in this state—haggard and worn as he was, the face above your own was soft. Smiling, faintly, and kissing you constantly.
You couldn’t pretend you didn’t enjoy it; you were far too tired and fucked out of your mind to protest right now.
Joel trailed a path with his lips from your chin to your ear. He kissed the hinge of your jaw and sank himself deeper.
“Mr.—” But you caught yourself, shortly, “…Joel.”
He lifted his head, not apologetic in the least.
“Maybe just one more—” he started.
“No,” you finished for him, sharp.
Still smiling, but with your eyes on him in a thinly veiled threat. Joel accepted that and kept his dick where it was.
What followed was gradual but natural enough. A little awkward as you broached that uncharted territory of remaining in the other’s presence after the deed was done, but Joel didn’t seem like he wanted to leave the bed, and you had nowhere else to go until dinner with your dad at eight. There was a moment you wanted to separate your body from Joel’s, if only to slip off to the bathroom by yourself, but the man just held you closer.
“You think your old man will mind if I joined tonight?”
Here the fuck we go.
“He’ll kill you.”
You pushed hard against his hold without getting so much as an inch of give. Joel had to fight back a chuckle.
“Oh, yeah? Why?”
“Because,” you began in a huff. Wriggling with very little success in his arms, while you were pinned in missionary, “I smell like you. You smell like me. My dad’s a drunk, but he can sniff stuff like that out in a heartbeat. Too risky.”
You punctuated those words with a still more serious look, but before you could nudge at his chest again or say something more, you were forced to swallow a scream. Joel’s grip tightened even more, and he moved to stand up from the bed—with you still in his arms and impaled on his cock. He started to walk to the bathroom.
“Great. Shower’s got plenty of room for the two of us.”
“Joel!”
“Glad I don’t have to keep reminding you of my name.”
His voice was smug. Your gaze was hard. Joel was still hard himself, amazingly, and you almost groaned when you felt the head of his cock bump somewhere soft and sensitive inside. He toted you into the big, bright room.
“If not tonight, how ‘bout tomorrow? Just you and me.”
He would never stop this shit. He reached for the faucet.
“Still too dangerous. You know that,” you chided. Your resolve only wavered a little when you felt the hot water start to pelt at your back. Joel closed the glass door, “Besides…I need to focus on figuring my shit out right now. Work and bills and getting myself a rental car soon.”
Joel paused. He turned, still holding you.
Then, just as swiftly as he’d stepped inside, he carried you right back out of the shower. You whined in protest.
He took you over to the bed and set you down. He left to find his wallet and keys. You might’ve been tempted to voice your displeasure in some other way—namely, by marching back to the bathroom, locking the door, and bathing alone—but before you could speak a word, Joel was back. He looked down at you and held out his fist.
“What’s—”
“Your dad and me’ll be up to our eyeballs in bullshit working the Garcia audit tomorrow—and I know you don’t want him seeing us leave together anywhere—so we can meet at Bohanan’s at six. How does that sound?”
You blinked.
“I don’t…have a car.”
Joel opened his hand. Keys dropped out.
In a single glance, you could see they weren’t his.
Joel drove a garish Super Duty F-450, not an Audi. The cogs were quick to turn in your head, but clearly not fast enough, because Joel was closing your fingers over the keys before you could breathe so much as a syllable to him. When you did, it came out more like a stutter. Palpably mad but far too rattled to get much out:
“Joel, I-I can’t—”
“I’ve been meaning to buy one anyw—”
“You’re insane,” you started to push the keys back, and for some reason, your heart was thudding extra hard as you did. You went on, unblinking, “You don’t…need to.”
“I want to.”
Joel’s hands were warm when he pressed both of his palms to secure yours between them. He could probably feel the way it shook a little, but he didn’t seem to care. His gaze was too busy trying to find, and hold, your own while you swallowed and stared and racked your numb brain for any words of defiance. At length, nothing came.
All you could do was meet that look. In the soft brown irises above, you could see it all—the need to comfort, and care, and provide where he could, offer better than the hand you’d been dealt and maybe, interspersed with those feelings somewhere, a simpler need in him to give.
For once, you wanted to believe it.
Fun fact: This fic was inspired by true events‼️💯 My life 😫🤪😤😈 Like reader, my truck is also busted as SHIT and needs $2,700 in repairs!!!! Unlike reader, I will not be sucking and fucking Joel Miller to recoup my losses (not asking for donations, just wanted to give y’all a giggle at my misfortune LOL)
#ENOUGH BULLSHITTING WE NEED MORE GLUCOSE GUARDIAN JOEL ON THE TL NEOWWWWW#🫵🏼😐#i’m begging y’all to write more for this very particular and off-putting dynamic bc i love it dearly#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller tlou#the last of us fic
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