#we were fr literally yelling each other at the end of the day

[gojoest]

Sukugo college au drives me me crazy 😭 and all of them are about enemies to LOVERS is it my fav trope? Not my fav but top 5 but it’s my top 1 for sukugo think about them fighting for us then you know how men put their foreheads together before fighting right???? They start to kiss aaaaaaaa i would be shocked but in a good shocked I am having so much brainrot about this (I hope you had a good day🫶🫶🫶)

the sexual tension gets the better of them. i like to think they would fight a lot, like actual physical confrontation that they would use as an excuse to feel up each other ksjdbs you can hear the obscenity in their pants and grunts while they tackle. and they both jerk off after the fight is over, knuckles still covered in each other’s blood, it feels like part of them is there, easing them through their high

[thelov3lybookworm]

omg can we please get some more delulu reader x delulu azriel where the whole ic thinks they’re crazy and would absolutely not be s good pair, but they’re delusional and think they’re obsessed w eachother

” look at him just staring at me, it’s so obvious he wants me it makes him look stupid ”

” babes he’s literally glaring at you as if he’s planning to murder you ”

” she just cannot look away can she? god I know she’ll be my girl by the end of tonight ”

” um hello??? she’s literally talking shut about you, I heard her a minute ago?????”

and they walk up to eachother looking like they’ll fight but then they kiss to everyones surprise and leave them all with their jaw dropped. bext morning they see az and reader having breakfast together, and they’re nice to eachother

” alright tell me again how you fell in love with me azzie”

” okay, so it was when you first punched me. I really felt the connection there ( no pun intended )😍😍 “

” ohhh mother above i knew it!!! for me it was when you almost choked me to death w your shadows, true love fr😍😍”

everyone at the table:😟😟😟😟😟😟

Delulu!azzie x delulu!reader (Part 2?)

Summary: The inner circle feels like... they are going insane.

•○●⛦●○•

A/n: hehe i really got nothing to say but i love this looooolll 😂

alsooo... i think this could be read as a part 2 to the previous lil thing i wrote for this prompt, so I'll just link it here if any of you wanted to read it 😉

enjoy, babes 😉

•○🌑○•

Mor's pov.

Mor was seriously concerned for her friend, and it was not something that happened often.

Her friends were usually more sensible than this, and usually didn't call one of the most powerful male in the whole of prythian an ugly bastard and then always walk around nagging them.

But currently, Mor's best friend was glaring daggers at the Spymaster of the night court from across the dance floor, and Mor had never been more scared at the glare on the shadowsinger's face.

It wouldn't have mattered that much if Y/n and Azriel simply hated each other. But the fact that Y/n was so delusional over him and thought that the glares he sent her every waking moment of his day were because he was in love with her, didn't sit right with Mor.

Mor had tried to point it out multiple times to the winter court female, but the female either never paid attention, or she didn't care.

And now, as Mor and Y/n sat in the bar with drinks in their hands, the latter glaring all the way across the dance floor to the booth where the Spymaster was sat with the rest of the inner circle, Mor watched on.

A moment later, Y/n scoffed, turning to Mor.

"Look at him just staring at me, it’s so obvious he wants me. It makes him look stupid."

Mor's jaw was practically on the ground, and she spluttered out the first thing that came to her mind.

"Y/n, he’s literally glaring at you as if he’s planning to murder you." She whisper yelled, incredulous. But Y/n had turned away already, caught again in a staring-and-glaring-holes-in-the-other-person's-skull match with Azriel.

Mor sighed, swirling her drink in her glass before taking a long sip from it.

Even if Mor pretended that the two were really in love, she simply could not imagine them being a great couple. Not saying that she didn't want the two to be happy, but watching the pair constantly be at each other's throat gave her no hope that they could ever be in a loving relationship.

If they could simply sort out their problems with each other, then maybe there was a chance. But if not, Mor was sure she'd find one of their heads lying in the hallways of their home if they ever got together.

•○●⛦●○•

Cassian's pov.

If someone told the Lord of Bloodshed that he'd be scared shitless of his own brother a few months ago, he would have laughed.

But here he was, coiled tight like a spring, ready to jump into action if his brother decided to kill the winter court female right in the middle of the dancing and drinking bodies that filled Rita's.

It was absurd. Ridiculous, really, how much hatred radiated off of Azriel as he sat there, practically breathing flames as he stared at across the dance floor.

To get a reprieve from the constant tension in his shoulders, Cassian stood, stretching before making his way towards the bar, near where Mor was sat with her friend.

"He is such a loser. I swear I've never seen such a big loser in my life. Ever." Cassian overheard Y/n say, and he had to physically stop himself from laughing.

"Y/n-"

Mor began, but Y/n beat her to it.

"He's also such a jerk. Bet he never gets any females because of that shit attitude."

Cassian decided it was enough overhearing for the day and walked back to where Azriel sat, the rest of the inner circle having slowly dispersed.

Cassian handed a glass to Azriel, who never took his eyes off the female that now stood from the stool she was sitting on with Mor, now making her way towards the dance floor.

The general watched as his brother knocked back the drink, slamming the empty glass on the table in front of him.

"She just cannot look away, can she? God, I know she’ll be my girl by the end of tonight."

Cassian very nearly spat out his drink, coughing loudly as he stared at the Spymaster, who glanced at him, unamused.

"Are you okay brother?" Azriel didn't reply, his gaze fixed on the dancing female, her gaze fixed on him. "Hello? Are you listening? She was literally talking shit about you, I heard her, like, a minute ago?"

Cassian was not proud enough to believe he was he smartest of people, and he would admit that he did sometimes get confused over things that needed using his brain. But he would like to blame his dumbness on his brain being closely guarded by his thick skull.

But the things he did not understand? Those things were actually supposed to make sense.

But this? Azriel's weird delusion about how the female from the winter court was obsessed with him? This was not something that was supposed to make sense, and it would leave even the smartest person in Prythian scratching their heads.

But Azriel either didn't hear Cassian, or didn't care, because in the next moment, he stood, ignoring his brother as he made his way onto the dance floor, his steps sure and cocky.

Cassian watched in growing nervousness, then horror and shock, as Azriel stalked up to Y/n, as she stared at him, her eyes sharp.

Cassian watched, as his brother took the face of the winter court female's face in his hands, and promptly slammed his lips onto hers.

Cassian's eyes widened, his jaw unhinging from his face and dropping to the ground. A quick glance to the kissing pair's right told him he was not the only one who was experiencing this onslaught of emotional cocktail.

Mor stared back at Cassian, her eyes as big as Nyx's fists, her mouth opening and closing like a fish's.

The scene was comical, though it didn't erase the shock coursing through Cassian's veins. And all that he could think about was...

What the fuck?

•○🌑○•

"Was I dreaming or did last night really happen?"

Most of the inner circle was seated around the dining table in the house of wind, holding their cup of their preferred beverages or eating their breakfast.

They all glanced up at Cassian as he spoke, but before anyone could reply, in walked Y/n and Azriel.

The sight of the two of them clinging to each other was as jarring as the night before, when the two of them had been filled with lust and clung to each other, kissing until Az winnowed the two of them away.

Well- Cassian thought, that is one way to answer my question.

The two ignored everyone else, as if not aware of their surroundings as they settled down next to each other, one of Y/n's hands clinging tightly around Azriel's bicep as he used the other to pile food onto a plate.

Azriel picked his fork, scooping up some scrambled eggs, holding it up for Y/n, who smiled and opened her mouth for him. He slipped the spoon inside, then took a bite himself.

The inner circle watched in shock, all thought eddying out of their brains as they watched the loving exchange.

"Alright tell me again how you fell in love with me Azzie." Y/n mumbled, laying her head on his shoulder after she finished chewing, hearts in her eyes as she stared at the spymaster.

Azriel seemed to think for a moment, then he smiled down at her as he held up his fork to her mouth again. "Okay, so it was when you first punched me. I really felt the connection there."

Y/n made a face that screamed aww. "So the first time we met?" Azriel nodded, nudging her to open her mouth. "Oh mother above, I knew it! For me it was when you almost choked me to death with your shadows." She sighed dreamily as she watched him take a bite of the food, completely oblivious to the turmoil the inner circle was going through.

Mor rushed to stand, mumbling something about having an important meeting as she hurried away. Rhys and Feyre stood too, saying they needed to check up on Nyx. And before Cassian could point out that Feyre was literally holding the babe, they walked away.

Left alone with the swooning couple, Cassian made eye contact with Nesta, who gagged silently at the love in the air, then inclined her head towards the stairs.

Cassian was all too happy to get out of there, as the moment him and his mate were out of sight, the sounds of clothes hitting the floor sounded, along with declarations of love.

And, honestly, Cassian was not one to judge people or be disgusted by other's love life, but he couldn't help but sympathise with Nesta when she gagged again.

•○🌑○•

Azriel Taglist: @darthdumbasss @foreverrandomwritings

General Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686 @cassie6392

[heeeepot]

Toys.

oneshot 💫

pairing: bf!heeseung x female!reader

includes: smut, fingering, oral (f receiving), angry sex?, overstimulation, dirty talk, unprotected sex (alwaysss use protection!) assertive heeseung — lmk if I missed anything!

story begins under the cut ! minors, dni:)

After a long day of yelling at people who work for you, all you needed was your girlfriend.

Heeseung was tired, setting down the last file in the cabinet before locking it. Getting ready to go home, he thought about you. About how less the time you guys spend together is getting each day, and it was Heeseung's fault.

He found it difficult to make time for you with all the work coming in unexpectedly, and he understood why you would be so upset about it.

Letting out a sigh, he walked to his car, driving back to his home, it wasn't a house. It was a special girl, Y/n.

Heeseung and Y/n have been dating for 3 years now, but they've been friends for 9.

They went through everything together. Since they were in middle school, everyone knew they were going to end up together, they were too oblivious to even see how much chemistry they had growing up.

That was until they were 18 when they realized they were inlove, one was just braver to admit it. And it was not Heeseung.

That's where it all started, everything was perfect, literally perfect. Until they both started working.

They felt like an old married couple who hasn't had as much intimacy anymore. But, that didn't stop them from going on a couple dates and surprising eachother with gifts time to time.

And that was unfortunately not going to happen tonight. Heeseung had come home late, not being able to buy her a gift.

All these thoughts in his head came to an end when he parked the car. Using the keys to unlock the house, surprised to see you still awake.

"Babe? It's nearly 1 am, what's keeping you up?" Heeseung asked, with obvious exhaustion in his voice.

"That's the problem, Heeseung. It's nearly 1. Do you even know how late that is? What can happen to you out there at this time? Did you even know that I texted and called you numerous times? Heeseung we went over this, I'm getting tired." Voice nearly breaking, Y/n almost didn't hold herself together at the few last words that left her lips.

"Y/n, I'm sorry, please. I know you're tired baby and I'm sorry, I probably don't know how you feel but I know that I'm hurting you, I don't want that."

"Ok, Heeseung. 4th time you said that this week." Y/n said bitterly. She was tired with all the excuses that he had.

Walking off to their room, Heeseung follows her, handing out to her wrist.

"Babe let's talk about thi—" Heeseung was cut off, on the bed was a bunch of toys, Y/n's toys.

Y/n's instincts were to run to them and try to hide it. She knew it wouldn't help but what else was she supposed to do anyway?

"Y/n?" Heeseung's voice was suddenly stern.

"What is it now?"

"Were you— possibly using those while I was at work, baby?"

"Me? Those?" Y/n scoffed, she knew he was onto her but she just wanted to see how far she can go with this.

"Who else would use a vibrator and a dildo, baby?" Heeseung's voice is suddenly low, as if he liked it.

"Don't know, maybe your other bitch left it here." Y/n shrugged. This pissed Heeseung off, he was sensitive when it came to mentioning other girls, he only focused on you.

"Oh, yeah?"

"What do you want, Heeseung? Whatever it is, I won't do it for you." Y/n rolled her eyes, this wasn't attitude, she just wants more attention. (y/n just like me fr)

Y/n turned to enter their bathroom. She suddenly felt a force behind her, pushing her into the bathroom, and suddenly placed on the counter.

"What the fuck, Hee?" Y/n was surprised.

"Don't act like you don't want this, Y/n." Eyes dark, his hair falling in front them.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about, Hee." Y/n's abdomen was suddenly warm, it turned her on.

"Then I'll show you what I'm talking about." He says, unbuttoning his black polo shirt while his eyes are still locked to yours.

"H-Hee, what are you doing?" You were suddenly nervous, even though this is what you were always asking for.

"Strip." He commanded, Y/n was frozen, just looking down at his body.

"I said strip or I'll do it for you." Voice deep and low, his adam’s apple going up and down with each word that left his lips.

When Heeseung said that, you felt a little bratty. Like how you always were when it came to situations like these.

"Do it for me, baby." You leaned in, you left a kiss on his weak spot. Right under his ear, just above the collarbone. His groans were audible, hips coming closer to yours.

His hands flew to your waist which he starves for everyday. Grip getting tighter with each kiss that left him wanting more and more. Your kisses alone would make him cum, that’s how weak he is when it comes to you.

"You do me so well, Y/n." He whispered, biting his lip careful to not let out moans.

His hands traveling to your smooth thighs, squeezing them. This made you whimper into his neck.

"I love hearing you, baby." He says, squeezing your thighs more.

Your breasts were now against his bare chest, you wanted to lick every muscle he had.

"Tell me, baby. Who were those toys for?" He asked, now reaching for your ass.

"None of your business, Hee." You backed away from his neck, which now had small redish purple patches from your mouth.

"What's the attitude for?" He was getting irritated, he always found your attitude unnecessary.

"I don't see any attitude." You shrugged, getting off the counter then walking back to the room.

He then carried you over his shoulder, dropping you onto the bed, keeping both of your hands in one of his, holding it above your head.

"Heeseung!" You shrieked, struggling to get out from his grip. He was towering over you, crotch to crotch.

He ties your hands to the bed frame, leaving you helpless, and you liked it. You always liked when he was assertive.

He removes your shorts and underwear in one motion, spreading your legs open. He was met with your pussy, full of slick that he was ready to eat off you.

"Your pussy will always be my favorite late night dinner, baby." He says, his face coming closer to your core.

He licks from your hole to your clit, collecting your slick on the tip of his tongue.

"I missed your taste, I’ll call in sick for work anytime for this." He says going in for another lick.

"Fuck, Hee please be gentle." Your voice came out shaky.

"Can’t promise you that, baby." He starts eating you out full on. Sucking on your clit and fucking your hole with his tongue.

This left your legs shaking, your moans couldn't be held back from the immense pleasure you felt. You then feel him enter two long digits in you, he starts curling his fingers and it made you want his long and thick dick inside you.

"My God, baby. More please, give it to me." You moaned, tears swelling up from the overstimulation.

His tongue hitting your clit repeatedly, his fingers pumping deep inside you. Sucking on your clit, he groaned. The vibration was enough to make you cum all over his fingers.

He brought it up to his lips and licked them clean. You were catching your breath, looking at him as he cleaned his fingers with his tongue.

"I’m not done with you." He says, removing his pants and boxers, his dick springs up and hits his abs, you could never forget how big this man is.

He sticks his dick inside you, groaning and gripping on your legs, he puts it on his shoulders, putting you in his favorite position.

He thrusts without a word, your lewd sounds became louder with each thrust.

His eyes locked with your bouncing boobs which were still clothed. Oh how he missed seeing that sight.

"Fuck H-Heeseung! Feels so good baby." You managed to say.

"You wanna use your stupid little toys while I’m at work, huh baby?" He asks still thrusting his dick inside you with a pace.

“N-No. I’m sorry, please." Your eyes rolled back from the mix of pain and pleasure. You clenched on his dick.

It got a loud moan out of him.

"Your tight little cunt is gonna make me cum soon baby, so fucking good for me." He breathes out, his words adding more lube to his dick.

Within a few more thrusts, you knew you were close.

"Baby, gonna cum soon." You moaned, voice all messy from the motions.

"Cum for me, baby." Those words were enough to make you release, your body shook from the scene.

"That's a good girl, I'm cumming soon baby, keep it tight for me." Hips pounding into your abused cunt, you loved letting him own you.

"Fuck baby, am I not fucking you often anymore? How are you taking my dick in better each time?" His head throws back, showing the marks on his neck, hands on your hips.

He cums inside you, filling you till it was dripping out of your pussy. You moaned at his action, he fucks his cum into you.

"Heeseung! Enough, please!" You pleaded, you could only take so much.

Heeseung let out a small laugh, he loved when you suffered, and it was all because of him. He had you under his control.

He eventually stops, dick pulling out still glazed in your combined liquids.

[eddiegettingshot]

okay but fr bucktmmy shippers could just be like "oh eddie is just the most important person in buck's life and tommy already knows that (see: first kiss scene) so makes sense they would pan to him" instead of making an excuse that makes even less sense "hes next in the roll call" like what. and at the end of the day all that happened was we saw buck looking at tommy get his medal and eddie looking at buck getting his medal and the shots were in direct parallel to each other and people can take from that whatever they want. but genuinely at this point every time I see someone ignore the blatant narrative signs that bucktmmy arent supposed to last, my head is like a MS word art yelling OPEN THE SCHOOLS so these people can learn a teensie tiny bit of media literacy

THE COPE IS LITERALLY CRAZY AT THIS POINT like?! oh yeah they ONLY showed eddie being "next on the roll call" and nobody else 😭 or alternatively they only showed BUCK and eddie being "next on the roll call" and it actually didn't mean anything for tommy at all that buck was watching him 😭😭😭😭 Anyway. the camera panned to eddie

[maymeowmoo]

New episode of Smg4?!?!?!? Well I'm inna writing mood soooooo.... Imma review/analysis and share my thoughts on the new episode >:) ["SMG4:SMG3's BOMB CAFE"] If you're bored feel free to read this overly detailed analysis of a 12:01 minute video! (Actually ~10:30ish)

Analyzing time! ^w^/

Smg3 being so happy abt his lil cafe is very cute. I did not expect Smg4 to be so goddam sassy in this episode but I like that they didn't get rid of their rivalry completely since u know, after so many years it would be odd for it to just disappear even if they have recently been bonding so much u<u

Still I couldn't help but feel a bit odd? Like idk if Four just desperately wanted Three to ask him for help w the coffee or what but DANG was he super into making Smg3's life harder. At 4:49 Smg4 basically goes screw it lets make Three more miserable and invites everyone. Like let bro learn overtime we don't need a Kirby Lunch Rush but with Smg3! Also Four's expressions? Dude is being SILLY on purpose u_u He continues his nuisance charade with 6:22 ("How can you not even have the unicorn frappucino?"). Like dang bro how abt u calm ur sass down and stop provoking Three even more? He does get a clear indication of Smg3's annoyance (8:51-8:52 Smg3 says "Shut up." to Four also stopping him from making another sassy remark) yet still continues. At 9:14 (Smg4:"So you admit you can't run a shop yet?") Four gives his snarky comment and all I can think of is how he intentionally made it harder for Three to run the dang shop. [Note: Tbh even someone who owned a shop would have a hard time with Smg4's Crew lets be fr.] Just like I said at the beginning of this paragraph I am starting to really believe Four wanted to be involved with Three somehow and the only way he knew how is by forcing conflict.

Characterization wise what surprised me is how even after two instances of Three yelling for the others to stop fighting they still continue on. Idk I just feel like they would've listened tbh. They were very... hyperactive I guess? The characters do act kinda like they should but it still felt odd to me for some reason. Eggdog as always has the best characterization tho, man do I like that silly egg thing. Anywho this wasn't the only thing that felt odd continuity wise. I would've thought Smg3 learnt to make proper coffee before he started up a cafe? Especially since he literally lived in a STARBUCKS??? Like I just think he would've idk tried making coffee before opening a cafe even if he didn't make any during his time in the Internet Graveyard. I did make up two explanations for this tho! One is that the dead memes (Specifically the funny lil knuckles) made the coffee during his time in the Internet Graveyard and the other is that he was just too anxiety/adrenaline ridden to make proper coffee. At the end of the day these things aren't huge issues for me but as I said before it did make me feel odd.

Smg4 getting called out for his sass was necessary for me to like this video so imma glad it happened and he doesn't just get away with his behavior. At 9:23 the realization of his silly shenanigans finally catch up to him and that means..... THE SMG34 PART OF THE EPISODE STARTS YEEHAW! Even though Smg4's and 3's confrontation felt just the tiny bit forced to me (probably Four's fault) it was so nice to see them being softer. I also really like how Three doesn't agree to Four's proposal without making some convoluted reasoning as to why this isn't just two pals helping each other out and is actually TOTALLY just a transactional thing. It feels really in character! Oh yeah since I need to put this somewhere at 9:47 Four is like "I want to help" and like... you made it harder and now you want to help? Better now then never tbh ^w^/

Jokes -> The joke at 2:27-2:34 made me chuckle ._. and that makes me somewhat disappointed in myself (You want it? Issa urs my friend is so real). 3:00 is also a joke I liked, it felt very relatable (I struggle with basic human stuff like buttons on a coffee machine also u_u aww man). 3:28-3:32 Decent joke! 4:12 having a Gmod Three bang the coffee machine was good but the sudden Pomni/Smg4 reaction wasn't for me :v (It is good for Au art tho, I've seen the Smg4 as Pomni art hehe ;P ). 5:55-6:05 Nice joke ^v^/ (Smg3 writing '1 jar of poison for Mario' was the cherry on top tbh). 6:29-6:35 just like the joke at three minutes the whole 'operating a coffee machine being like dark magic' is still funny to me. 7:35-7:38 7:45-7:46 the music that plays when the rainbow (acid) coffee is shown is cool. 8:34-8:49 The whole Tari going coo coo joke is honestly pretty unfunny ._. I did not like it :v. 10:44-10:45 'Cleaned up everything!' is such a funny pop up to put here. Joke APPROVED!

Joke wise I think this episode is actually quite solid. The one joke I really didn't like kinda puts it down but ignoring that issa cool ig :D (6,8/10)

Closing statement -> Dude Four on roller skates working at a cafe for Three? THIS IS JUST A FANFIC AT THIS POINT... and I am all for it ;D

[Note: I have no idea why I wrote this but I felt like it sooooo... YEAH! >:3 If you have any thoughts abt this ep I'd love to hear em ;o]

[kuroosdarling]

tag all of your mutuals and put beside it the kind of person they are im really curious :)

oh boy !!! buckle up bc i am ready to pour out my love <33 i love all of my talented moots so i’m just going to say a few things about them and hopefully it answers your question !! hehe they’re all wonderful people and im super glad to know each and every one :’)

i have a lot more newer moots that i’d like to gush about too but i am v shy when it comes to interacting !!! so if we are moots and you’re not here it’s just bc i’m shy about tagging you !! :(<3

@myheroesaretired nesi !! she puts up with all my shit i stg lol she gets so many of my unfiltered thoughts … sry nesi </3 i feel like i’ve known her forever even tho it’s been a couple months pls!! she’s so easy to talk to and i’m v thankful for her support :’) literally think we were twins in a past life tbh !!

@sookisaurus risu !!! one of my first moots hehe risu is so incredibly welcoming and she looks after everyone <3 i love chatting with her any chance i can bc she’s so funny n always has something good to say <3 also whenever we start talkin bout kuroo it’s game over 😵‍💫🤍 we feed into each others brainrots and im always here for it !!

@mattsunkawa echo !! my bubs hehe omg she’s so funny n chill and i love talking to her sm <3 i bug her all the time PLS !! anytime we watch a new anime it’s tradition to yell to each other about it at this point. from aot -> op -> csm + bluelock lol !! i love when we share bits of our writing with each other just to rile the other one up lmfao !!

@oooohno nana <3 literally the sweetest person ever !! anytime we chat or interact i get so so happy!! she’s so kind and literally always tags me in the best stuff 🤧 so incredibly thoughtful to everyone on here <33 she’s sm fun to talk to :) especially when we dive in about our fave characters !

@ohtokki WAH laura !! <3 such a friendly and warm person fr her energy just makes everyone feel at home !!! the type of person i’d love to sit and have some tea with and talk about anything !! (esp video games lol)

@1812p4n K🥺 one of the kindest people on this site!! always spreading love and happiness to everyone on the dash <3 what did we do to deserve her fr 🤍✨

@crescentkaze KAZE !! such a sweetie but also her MIND !! pls anytime i wanna rant about railing fictional characters i run to her immediately !!! we always end up building off each other and idk those convos always make my day :’)

@discordkittenjoestar - kendall pls !! she’s so so funny and i love all of her shitposts sm <3 also super sweet n supportive hehe and im excited to talk to her more O:

@akisbrew SOBS !!! aims !! she is seriously so funny and so down to earth!! such a chill person and incredibly supportive !! she’s someone i would love to sit down and vibe with, chatting bout life and our her mans (jean<3)

@taintedsorrcw milo bby <33 queen of events methinks !!! she always creates beautiful themes, events n masterlists !!! she’s also so so sweet and sm fun to talk to !! :)

@soshiina ina !! SOBS !! so incredibly funny and has such a vibrant energy !! chaotic in the best way possible that makes you wanna just talk to her for hours on end fr !!! <3

@writingbymoonlight luna :)) i always love whenever i get to interact with luna because she is just so sweet !! i feel like she has the best book recs tbh bc anytime i see her post about a new book she got it makes me want to go read it too O:

@satisfactooru bay !! pls !! literally could gush about her all day 🥺 she’s so nice and welcoming !! i feel like she’s good at making others feel heard and appreciated <33 such a kind soul fr hehe

@oomiya anyone that knows haley knows she super sweet 🥺 anytime we interact i feel so warm n fuzzy !! she has a way with words and making everyone feel safe tbh <3

@wakatshi - anytime i think of the word lovely i think of daria hehe she’s so nice and her aesthetic is gorgeous !! (just like her pls!!)

@daiception nini !!! she’s so so gorgeous and i luv her style !! we are newer moots but anytime we interact it brings a big smile to my face <3

@kurootosis lem 🥺 lovely lem !! i always luv seeing her on the dash hehe but i still get shy reaching out to interact sometimes lol !! she has such a cool vibe and she’s someone i would love to sit and talk to at a cozy lil cafe !!

@kurooandkenmasslut nat !! i think we became moots like yesterday lol BUT i love her energy !! she seems like sm fun and im glad we are interacting bc i always need more people to gush over kuroo n kenma <33

[tojikai]

hi so first things first i LOVE the permanent mark series it’s honestly one of the best series i’ve read on here :)

secondly, fuck gojo

if he knew that when he saw rie again that he was gonna catch feelings for her again or looked for her in y/n then he should’ve left y/n alone to spare her from the heartbreak. i feel like deep down even when he was with y/n he still looked for glimpses of rie in her like those feelings for rie never went away. then with him yelling at y/n when she flinched and rie fell back, it was literally a human reaction to flinch (fight or flight response) when someone grabs you out of nowhere LIKE CMON GOJO USE THAT BRAINN

but also, fuck rie. if she knew that gojo was still with y/n or even had a suspicion that they were still together, she should’ve backed up. i will say that i feel like she’s starting to piece everything together and see that gojo still deeply cares for y/n and is in that state of mind where it’s like “i had him first and he chose me but why does he care so much now?” it’s almost like she can feel him starting to slip away little by little. and now that she feels threatened, she’s gonna do what she can to keep gojo with her.

lastly, poor y/n. she doesn’t deserve that pain and heartbreak. like imagine one day the man your in love with says “we need to end things, i didn’t cheat i just need a break” only to find out he did cheat with his high school gf. i would cry my little heart out. like yes she may have been his first love but y/n didn’t deserve all that pain of the breakup only for them to rub it in at the party. she deserves so much better :( I AM JUST PRAYING THAT ONCE SHES ALL BETTER SHE BEATS THE SHIT OUTTA RIE

bring out the boxing ring and let y/n rock ries shit fr cause that rie bitch deserves her ass whooped

the boxing ring sent me LMAOO 😭 that's a whole fight you're planning there, nonnie 😭 but yeah, gojo and rie, i wouldn't say they're 'in love' back in high school, but like they're infatuated with each other, they're young and you know young people. then when they met again, as he said, it got 'stronger'. and you're right, POOR YN. like the girl's been doing her best to try and move on alone. but i had to make things painful and write the story HAHHSHAHAHA jk but yeah, we could only hope that her life gets kinder to her 🥺 n eways THANK YOU SO MUCH, nonnie !! i really appreciate this ~🥺♥️ i hope you're doing great !!!

[rintarous]

s-some hcs for miya twins sister (yn miya gang rise up✊🏻) dating suna👉🏻👈🏻 p-perhaps🥺

wow okay thank u for this now my brain will finally be drippin with big brain juice okay so here i go bois

u can’t tell if suna has a death wish or suna definitely has a death wish

like the twins are literally so protective of you

no opposite sex is allowed within .5 radius with u unless one of them is there

and to think suna had the balls to ask you out

so surprise surprise

y’all be dating in secret

tbh that just made the entire relationship with suna more exciting

so anywho

the twins start to notice how you always want to tag along to their practices n shit

when you used to hate waiting for them but now you literally ask them if they have practice

and at first they were touched and was all like: “awww our wittle sister wants to watch us play <333″

but in ur head ur just like: “bruh u fuckin wish. i’m just there to sit and look pretty while looking at my pretty bf u two dk abt <333″

so then they start noticing suna literally staring at u or sumn shit suna doesnt do on the daily

so they obviously get sus of suna

not u cs they love u and they think their sister is a pure angel

so they sit back and observe suna’s actions whenever you’re around vs when you’re not around

osamu: look at him... he looks so in to the game and he looks at y/n’s direction.. i don’t fuckin like it one bit

atsumu, rolling his sleeve: aight bro u know what it is

they approach their middle blocker bestie with the most intimidating face they could muster

“can i help you..?” suna eyes the twins cautiously

“what’s going on with you and our sister?” atsumu gets straight into the mf point

on the inside suna was in shambles

not that he’d admit it, but he’s lowkey scared of the twins when it comes to you

cs he obviously heard stories abt them u know... scaring the kids who want to ask you out away and shit

suna (in the tiniest voice): who?

but then their little act of being two intimidating big bros got cut off cs u walked towards them

“hi are we having a lil party here?” you asked as you joined their lil group

you and suna exchanged a small glance before messing around with your brothers + suna respectively 

osamu gives suna a look that basically reads: “this isn’t over”

fast forward a couple of days later

the twins surprisingly had plans and left u alone in the house

so u know what that means ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

you invite suna over!!!

the first and probably the only date u two could ever have

(at the moment at least)

suna was a bit sus and wary over the whole thing like,, how and when tf do the twins have plans 

but he still came over anyway

so y’all were in ur room n shit

watching netflix and all that funky shit

no netflix n chill up in here bois ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

just kidding there is netflix and chill

so y’all were kissing up in this bitch right

kiss kiss muah muah

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

then suddenly the front door slams open and cue the twins fighting over stupid shit 

suna is once again.. in shambles

LIKE WHERE TF IS HE GONNA GO 

THIS 6′1 BITCHASS CAN’T HIDE ANYWHERE WITHOUT THE TWINS SNIFFING HIM OUT

im dead

so anyway

“oi y/n we got you something to eat come down here!” osamu would yell 

“coming!” you yell back as you tried to make urself as presentable as possible with suna in the bg just all panicky 

then suna is like “thanks for the memories bae” like he was abt to die

oh yeah he is abt to die 

then atsumu just CASUALLY barges in your room like it was nothing

“why are you taking so long- WHAT THE FUCK” atsumu just loses it

osamu comes running in cs he thinks his baby sister got murdered since atsumu just screamed in bloody murder but nah 

“wha wha wha wha wah what-” - the twins

think of that lipstick in my valentino white bag when they say what

and u were on the brink of crying cs u think the twins dont want suna for u and they abt to force u to break up with him 

and suna being the deadpan person himself just sighs and says: yeah im dating ur sister. so be it

the twins were like: :O like they couldnt say anything

when tbt to the time at the gym where they were ready to cuss him out

so they kinda stare at each other for a bit 

u know,, twin telfatty n shit 

and they suddenly nod their heads and say: “okay. we approve”

a fuckin miracle happend in ur room !! can u believe it ??? 

but they did sit suna down and basically presented a powerpoint presentation on the things they would do if suna ever thinks about hurting you in some shape way or form

“even if we’re bros from another hoe, our sister is literally no exception. we would burn the world for her so you better set your ass straight you slow starter bitchass lying ass i fucking hate you-” atsumu, frantically wiping his tears realizing his little sister is all grown up

osamu, trying to not cry listening to his brother: yeah suna... we fucking hate you

but fr deadass they have a whole list of possibilities on the things they’d do to suna (or anyone in general) who dare and hurt their lil sister: u 

and u were just watching them like: 😬

you love ur bros,, u rlly do

overall,,,, its such a chaotic fun time

like ur a miya, ur life is already fun and chaotic with the twins around as your brothers

and the fact u’re dating suna?? their bestie?? even made it more fun 

the end <3 

[bitchiha]

i need some fluff huhu. can i have naruto with mom reader hc or imagines? thank u 😍

A/N: ive never done anything like this before but I like this idea 10/10

Also special credit / mention to @softnaruto because we talked about some of these ideas but w Iruka not a mother figure lol

✎ Being Narutos Mother Figure *sparkles but they’re on fire bc this is chaotic*

Overall, before I get into the details, I’d say this is a very chaotic task lol. You’re probably half dead after dealing w his ass for so long, but seeing this boy that you thought of as your own son grow up before your eyes is so rewarding. It’s great, so wholesome 100/10.

You and Iruka definitely co-parent

Naruto would be constantly protecting you from Jiraiya. Like he doesn’t want the man near you. Runs over to you whenever Jiraiya is nearby and starts screaming “Missus Y/N, run! Pervy Sage is here, I’m doing you a favour, believe it!” No but in all seriousness, take Narutos advice because I know Pervy Sage is tryna hit it.

You end up having to talk to Jiraiya eventually though because you need to know what’s going on with Naruto and the Akatsuki and what you can do to help. Naruto will watch over the interactions like a hawk. Will whip a chopstick at Jiraiya if he tries anything on you, “Back it up pervy Sage! I said three meters apart, there’s no excuse!” So you’d have to meet eachother in secret because you won’t be able to discuss much when the blondies around.

Also, the amount of times you’ve chased his ass around the village after he got into some major trouble is too many times to count. He’s running as fast as he can away from you because he knows you’re gonna whoop his ass lol. Probably even uses his shadow clones, but you know better than to fall for those stupid tricks. No but fr, it’s a really good workout tbh you probably ran a marathon.

You treat him to ramen whenever he comes back from a mission. Sometimes Iruka comes along as well and you both alternate who pays the bill. Naruto always challenges you to a ramen eating competition. Luckily Iruka is there to hold you two back because he knows neither of you are financially stable enough to endure that damage to your wallets.

Literally everyone; Konoha 11, kakashi, iruka, Jiraiya, Tsunade, etc... always threaten Naruto by saying that they’ll tell y/n he’s not cooperating. It works like a charm everytime. There’s no way he wants to hear you lecture him for a good 2 hours. He’d rather get rasenganed into the face than listen to your horrible attempts at being wise.

You always ruffle Narutos hair when you see him. It’s like your signature sign of affection. You also call him “kid” all the time or “youngster” even though you’re like the same age as Kakashi and therefore not old yourself.

He calls you miss. He sometimes calls you Aunty y/n. Refuses to just call you y/n because he wants to be respectful, he looks up to you as a figure of guidance no matter how much he’ll deny it. So no matter how many times you tell him not to call you miss, he will.

Lots of walks! Like you’ll wait for him with Iruka at the village gate when Narutos supposed to return from a mission. It’s like parents picking up their kid from a field trip aweeee. You’ll pack some snacks for the three of you and he fills you in on his missions. He’ll always be like, “Awe no way! Thanks Missus Y/N. You’re the best!” When you give him all the food you packed.

He always comes to you for advice or to rant to you about Sasuke, Sai, Sakura and literally all the other Konoha 11. Lol, but he will rant about you to Iruka and Jiraiya all the time, little does he know you do the same.

Would purposely set you into mama bear mode on Sai for his own amusement. Like he just gets a kick out of watching you confront Sai about calling Naruto some absurd obscenity and watch poor Sai just stand there like: (°_°) lol what do I do? Naruto is snickering behind a tree because he just made that all up. Yamato probably has to intervene when he sees it. Will have to woodstyle justu you when he realizes you’re in mama bear mode.

Hes such a troublesome rat. You love him though. He’s your troublesome rat-son.

Naruto is used to you being hot headed like Tsunade when he gets into trouble, but if you ever take the disappointed route instead, he will cry lol. Like he hates that you’re actually disappointed with him, he didn’t mean to trick you into yelling at Sai, please forgive him.

All celebrations are done with Kakashi, Iruka, Naruto and yourself. Since you all don’t really have any real family to celebrate with, you’ve made your own. It’s so chaotic tho lol.

These events are always ‘surprises for Naruto’ so the cooking is up to you and Kakashi, but Kakashi is so fast at cooking he doesn’t even let you do anything. You have to physically stop him so you could do some of the work. Meanwhile Iruka sets up decorations for the event and he’s probably singing festive songs LOOL. Plus he can’t sing so it’s an extra headache ontop of you yelling at Kakashi to let you do some work.

Then you all surprise Naruto with your half burnt food (while you were fighting the food most definitely lit on fire) and extremely cheesy decorations. Oddly Iruka even decorated the floor. Like wtf. Anyways, Naruto doesn’t really care about how bad it actually was, he was just happy to have people around him that cared enough to invite him to a celebration.

The food is inedible so you go to Ichirakus instead and somehow persuade Iruka into paying for all four of you <3 this happens every holiday so he ends up just saving his money in preparation for it.

Naruto tries to be a matchmaker for you LMFAO. He tries to get you and Iruka together which ends so awkwardly omg, then he’ll try and get you and kakashi together which was even more awkward and DONT get me started on Yamato omg.. He was so nervous he just stared at you the whole time like a googley eyed tree frog or something. Each time you catch onto Naruros little Cupid schemes you tell him to buzz off and that you’re not interested, but he doesn’t listen.

Your other holiday celebrations may be badly executed, but you actually host the best birthdays for him!! You pair up with Tsunade, Shizune, Kakashi, Iruka and Sakura to throw him really memorable birthdays. They may not make up for all the ones he missed celebrations for already, but you do your best to make these extra memorable.

At the end of the night after every birthday party, you walk him home and pat his shoulder sadly talking about how he’s growing up so fast. You probably end up crying because you're sad the little doofus is maturing somewhat. You tell him that and he laughs. Once you’re at his apartment door he’ll grin tiredly and give you a big hug. “Thanks again, aunty y/n.” You probably cry again on the way home bc he actually hugged you. That’s so sentimental omg. That is roughly about what happens every single birthday.

For your birthdays he treats you to ramen and gets you some weird kitchen gadget or something. Figures you’re an adult and they probably need these things. You don't, but you appreciate the gift anyway. 

He buys you flowers every Mother’s Day. It makes you so emotional. You definitely cry. “Awe missus y/n! Not again. You’re so emotional.” He probably starts crying too though lol.

It breaks his heart to see you cry omg. Poor baby is like a lost puppy when you cry. Like not you’re over exaggerated crying, but your said painful crying. Once, after hearing some distressing news about the Akatsuki, you just break down. Naruto has become a son to you after all and you want to protect him so badly, but how can you do that when you’re up against powerful rouge ninjas? You cried in front of him for the when you two were having your weekly dinners at your place, all the sudden you just burst out crying and it hurt him so much because he knew it was because you were so worried about him.

Honestly, he probably ruffles your hair —like you do to him — in attempt to cheer you up. “It’s okay, Aunty y/n. I’ll take care of it, everything will be okay, believe it!”

Oh yah also, speaking of weekly dinners! You guys definitely get together at least once a month or if it’s a good time, once a week to have dinner. We all know Naruto only survives on ramen, so you try and cook him healthy food, but my god he resists so hard. Then you give him that warning look and he chows down that salad so fast lol.

It would be 10/10 he's a great kid

[alotsgonnachange]

Mystic Messenger Saeran’s AE Thoughts (.......And Prayers..) #Spoilerz

Hello, I just finished Saeran’s after ending and I have a lot of things to say and I am going to write it down while I'm still all keyed up about it.

First of all… Please DO NOT ask me how much money I spent to finish this as fast as I did…. I’m grown but my bank account is certainly going to have a good ole fashioned CHUCKLE at this….. It’s been a long quarantine I deserve a lil happiness as a treat methinks!

I have been playing this absolutely insane game since I think 2016? When I first started playing the deep routes had JUST come out I think? And I was just finishing up high school and am now a college grad...lmao

I’ve played all routes at least once except Jaehee but i’ve seen walkthroughs of her route (I’ve heard it makes you hate Jumin and he’s my favorite so um. hehe). V’s and Saeran’s routes I found to be so emotionally intense and just….a lot and I've been waiting a long ass god damn time for this after ending okay…. I would theorize and make up an ending in my head but i’m no writer so it was hard to figure out lol. I’m a Jumin stan mostly but I love everybody and yeah I should probably play that jumin dlc too but I need like a DAY to recover from Saeran’s AE. Enough about me HERE are my thoughts on it overall

Major Saeran AE Spoilers under da cut!

Can we please discuss V showing up to the C+R conference room with basically chloroform and made everybody Pass Out like??? I was alone in my room at like midnight just SCREAMING at my phone???? And the creepy ass CG ???? It’s like that gif of sarah paulson from ahs being like “I put arsenic in the wine….and the pasta”

Anyway I screamed at V a lot during this process!!

Loved RFA being sweet and kind to saeran (before V fucking drugged them…)

This is such common V behavior “I have to do it all myself...there’s no other way..” GIRL SHUT UPPP You do this every route....

SO many CG’s and I enjoy them a lot

Saeran’s sprite looks a little TOO crisp compared to everyone else but maybe its a glitch??? V next to him is in 480p while saeran is like 1080p

Hearing both Saeran and Saeyoung missing the other brother the whole time??? PAIN. All my homies know is PAIN

BOSS and his V for Vendetta ass guy fawkes mask??? I literally yelled “this game is TERRIBLE!!” several times at my phone

Their dad is so>??????? When he was sitting on the couch with saeyoung in that one CG while simultaneously telling him to kill himself?????????? Maybe chairman han is actually the best dad in this game somehow

When V and Rika were like we’re back together teehee teehee okay pack it up bonnie and clyde ..

When chairman han calls u and says hes jealous of u and saeran…..HUH????? I’m calling HR

When they go to the apartment and see boss and vanderwood and poor saeyoung is sitting there seeing his brother for the first time in years i wanted to D word sooooo bad like PAIN...PAIN….

Can we HAVE A DISCUSSION ABOUT JUMIN HAN BEING THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE GAME AND HE LOST EVERYTHING IN THIS AE……. he just took the blame and moved on jumin what the hell….. I love him so much r we serious? He watched his 2 closest friends betray him in the worst way and found out abt how Rika abused Saeyoung and Saeran???? I felt just AWFUL. Terrible ...Terrible….

Rika’s change in demeanor from Saeran's actual route is certainly a Choice. I find her much more bearable this time around and unfortunately i think I was too nice to her and ended up with a bad end LMFAO

I was happy to see Saeran stand up for himself and become stronger and confident. You go king!

The CG of Yoosung laying in Zen’s lap is everything to me…

HOWEVER YUP I sure did get a bad ending and I was so mad fdsafdskfdhsf ! (I would be happy to clarify how I got the good one the second time.) MAKE SURE To SAVE EARLY in days 2 and 3 bc the branches on day 4 is where the bad end will show up. For me it was the first day 4 chat and then a story mode titled “SAVIOR”.... If you see that RUN FOR THE HILLS!!

I was so mad! But I had saved in day 2 and replayed and MANAGED to get good end

I’m obsessed with everyone calling V and Rika “that psychotic couple” like…..its true its true…

No those two are so toxic… V’s route was torture watching them go on and on about the sun like yo can yall just call each other babe like normal people.

I respect straight people but not V and RIka that shit was just wrong… Straight marriage was a mistake

Oh lord i also FULLY Forgot Rika killed the twins’ mother…. Yeah that scene was um Certainly a lot but it needed to happen eventually

Like it’s good they know but damn that storyline is just so bleak

I think it was satisfying TO A DEGREE….To see Rika understand where she was wrong, why she was wrong, fess up and even APOLOGIZE! I was very surprised.

Saeran and Saeyoung are Certainly twins with the amount that those two self sacrifice in every route MY GOD…..

The scene with Jumin talking to his father and the other scene of him praying oh my god I cannot tell you how happy I was to see him begin to understand and address his own feelings in a route that was not his own. My main problem with Jumin’s route has always been the trapping MC in his penthouse aspect.. This way Jumin understands love and emotions without being overly possessive !!! YAY also loved seeing him be on good terms with his dad who was surprisingly profound

That last Story mode was Really a Lot…. and Strange things occurred which I will get into in just a minute

Jumin becoming a politician is so funny but ngl … i see it.

Yoosung going to france to study pastries ok king I see u! (it made more sense to me than the vet thing anyway)

Lastly Zen FURRY ERA

MY BEEF With the AE

I was happy with how they handled it for the most part. I think Cheritz heard our feedback about V’s after ending and was like okay….let’s try something different

HOWEVER

Saeran…. Sweet kind saeran… IS SO AFFECTIONATE HAHA….

He must have said I love you like 300 times…..very mushy gushy flowery language...and maybe that’s just his personality but for me it was like eating cake with buttercream cake. It means well, but god damn is it sugary and going to cause a stomach ache later.

He was just… SO MUCH! SO forward and ON all the time in his affections. I honestly felt kind of smothered and by day 3 and 4 I was sooooo over all the compliments… King you’ve come a very long way, but ur still putting MC on a pedestal and probably need to see a therapist.

Nextly….Rika and V….. Naw that knock out gas really ...that hurt lol. Coming from “I would do anything to protect RFA” V? Idk like…. EYE felt betrayed reading that. It was just hurtful. I can’t even imagine how the members would have felt as they were passing out. It was just so cruel. I suppose I understand why but like?? Just TERRIBLE

Them being in cahoots with the agency and the prime minister..HUH??? Also too much

V just felt so irresponsible like I do understand that he ended up in a weird web of secrets that’s hard to untangle but he’s so fucking stubborn he’s SO stubborn it makes me insane. Like sir… It seems like in other routes he wanted to try to protect Rika and the RFA.. But in this AE it seems more to me that he was like yeah i’m protecting Rika and That’s It… so fucking hurtful to me. Both of y’all apologize ESPECIALLY to the twins and Jumin..

The forgiveness thing…… Okay so I think some people will not like that Saeran decided to “forgive” the people who hurt him (Rika, V, Saejoong, his mother). I would point out that I actually think this was approached somewhat well. He says at one point that he doesn’t think they’re good or bad, just people. I think he sounded mature and like this was the way for him personally to accomplish his healing process. Would I have loved for Saeran to flip V and Rika off and kick Saejoong off a cliff? Yea I really would. But like…. If that’s what HE needs to do to heal then who am I to judge?

HOWEVER…. Everything Eye just said goes out the window when the scenes at the end with Saejoong come up… I was PERPLEXED. Like why did he HUG his deranged father who just kicked the shit out of him??? Also all the chat options that MC has with him r like blah blah you’re like this because no one loves you were so corny to me LMFAOOOO?

AND WHEN HE WAS IN THE ROOM LATER WITH SAERAN… i’m sorry but if that were me I would have called a nurse to deck his ass. Cool he turned himself in YOU SUCK SOOOO BAD AND I NEVER WANT YOU TO COME NEAR SAEYOUNG AND SAERAN AGAIN THANKS.

*scratches ass* I wish I got to see saeyoung and saeran finally sit down and have that first conversation after a long time and hug CG but the ending was fine I GUESS….. I dont care about ROMANCE I want those boys to be happy brothers together

Anyway that was really emotionally exhausting but I fr think I got it out of my system after literal years… And I can rest in peace knowing the choi twins are happy. THATS ALL I WANTED TO KNOW!!!!

[myblueeyedbuggers]

My Boys

Chapter 10

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14

Pairings: Reader x Steve Rogers (best friend) Reader x Bucky Barnes

Word Count:1843

Warnings: Slow Start, Language.

Summary: After being abandoned by her parents in Brooklyn in 1929, y/n makes a living for herself by working for the Ц��ни лабуд gang until she meets two boys in a back alley and her life slowing begins to change.

Annnddd I’m back! so I know it’s been a while since the last update and I just wanna thank you all for having patience with me while I finished up with college, just a warning this chapter may feel a little awkward to read due to me just getting back into my writing mind so apologises in advance for this one. Anyways I’ll quit blabbering, Enjoy everyone! :)

This was my day of reckoning, my punishment for all the bad deeds I’d done over the past couple of years…I was finally being sent to school. Okay maybe that was a tad dramatic, but can you blame me? I mean who wants to be trapped in a building against their will for 7 hours straight learning about dead guys?! No sane person would willingly agree to that crap!

I’ve tried just about everything to avoid my approaching doom, hell I even went as far as hiding in the basement surrounded by cobwebs to try and get out of this, but as per usual neither Steve or Bucky took mercy on me, hence why in currently trapped between the two. “You are aware I’m perfectly capable of walkin’ by myself aren’t ya? The looping of the arms is not needed boys” I swear down these two are being more annoying than usual, and I didn’t think that was humanly possible cause these two are basically the living embodiment of annoyance. Steve turned and raised his eyebrows at me, shaking his head as he let out a small laugh, “Yeah there’s absolutely no way I’m fallin’ for that again, last time that happened it look me and Buck an hour to get you outta that tree”. Ah crap there goes that plan.

I’m pretty sure the noise I made wasn’t even human, it was a mix between a seal and a possessed monkey “I’m not gonna get outta this am I?” “Nope” and que another frustrated groan. “Is this payback for the time I placed that bucket of flour above your bedroom door and watched the both of you turn into ghosts? If it is then I want you to know I regret nothin’” both of them stopped and glared at me, for some reason they didn’t find that as funny as I did, and I have no idea why. Okay whatever you do y/n don’t laugh, even if Steve’s face looks like a slapped arse don’t laugh! A snicker slipped past my lips and a few seconds later I was full on laughin’.  Goddamn it.

Both of em just let out a bunch of sighs and started draggin’ my butt along the street, wait there’s somethin’ I haven’t tried yet…in hindsight this is completely stupid but screw it. “OH MY GOD LOOK A SPACESHIP!” I’m pretty sure poor Bucky jumped outta his skin, Steve ended up trippin’ up and falling down, I’ll admit that I felt bad about but hey may plan worked! So why am I still standin’ there?… maybe we try this thing called running y/n! I quickly pulled my arm away from Bucky and used my new-found freedom to run in the opposite direction of them, I could hear the shouts of protest from the both of them, so I decided to kindly ignore them and absolutely leg it.  “GODAMMN IT Y/N! THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME THIS MORNIN’!” when were the boys gonna catch on that I didn’t wanna go? Do I need to prepare a firework show and blast it in their faces or somethin’…probably.  

I know I probably shouldn’t be smiling, but the feeling of the wind flowing through my hair as my feet hit the ground made me feel free, after so many years I could finally begin acting my age and enjoy my childhood. I finally felt content with my life, which is probably the opposite of what I should be feeling at this moment in time, considering I was currently making my grand escape. And to completely honest I’ve got no bloody clue as to where I am. I glanced behind me to see where the hell those idiots were, to my surprise Steve was directly behind me, Buck was somewhere in the back holdin’ his knee and I’m guessing the daft sod decked it. Why am I not surprised? Okay maybe I should of kept my mouth shut cause literally a second later my foot tripped over a rock and, you guessed correctly, I landed on my ass for the thousandth time!

“Sh*t! Cr*p! B*lls! That f**king hurt!” and that ladies and gentlemen is my fine command of the queens English, a groan of pain made me loose my train of thought as I turned my head to Steve, to put it simply he was laid flat on his back with his eye closed. Well there’s the rush of guilt I’ve been waiting for, “Sh*t Steve I’m sorry, you okay down there tough guy?” I quickly offered him my hand to help him up, I mean it’s the least I could do. Steve’s hand grabbed mine, a not so quiet grunt of pain made me feel even worse, quick question why am I such an assh*le at times? “Yeah, I’m fine y/n, don’t worry about it you know for a fact I’ve had worse” a quiet sigh left my lips as I brought him in for a hug, which was a tiny bit awkward due to the height difference. Once we pulled away from each other, I couldn’t supress the need to check him for anymore injuries, much to Steve’s embarrassment and Bucky’s amusement, “Jesus I’m gonna have to start wrapping ya up in blankets and pillows, Steve how the hell did you manage to get a bruise on your ear?!”

The sudden gasp behind me pretty much answered the question for me, it’s safe to say barney boy is in trouble…for the first in my life Bucky looks pretty f**king terrified of me, perfect. Slowly I started inching towards him, the glare I was sending him would probably make a demon cry for his mum…so yeah imma go kill the boy. I didn’t even have to say anything, he just started runnin’, “IT’S NOT MY FAULT HE STOLE MY FR**KING PUDDIN’ AND THE PUNK KNOWS I LOVE MY PUDDIN!’” YEP DEFINITELY KILLIN’ HIM “HE IS A SMALL AND GENTLE BOY HOW IN THE NAME OF HELL CAN YOU EVEN THINK OF LAYIN’ A HAND ON ‘IM?!” god this sounds like a bleeding soap opera.

 At this point I wouldn’t be surprised of someone called the cops on us, all everyone woulda seen was a big lad runnin’ for his life as a small lass tried to murder him while a smaller lad ran after the pair yellin’ for em to quit it.  Now that I think about, that’s actually hilarious. Wait, where was I? ah yes the murdering of one James Barnes…okay that is not a normal sentence I am aware. “HE.STOLE.MY.PUDDIN’! THAT A CRIME WORTHY OF DEATH!” oh for f**ksake “HOW THE HELL DO YA KNOW IT WAS HIM?! DID YOU NOT THINK IT COULDA BE BECCA?!” I think he made a sudden realisation, cause the dumbass stopped running and BOOM I was on the freakin’ floor. Again. We both groaned, mine was mostly in annoyance more than anything, but seriously the bloody floor is quickly becoming me best mate! “…. It just dawned on me that that could be a possibility…” if my neck twisted any quicker I’m 100% sure that I’d end up doin’ that weird owl thing “Oh now you realise?! Ya gonna say sorry to Steve or not?” a few seconds of silence gave me my answer. “Don’t give me that look y/n! I ain’t doing s**t till I’ve got some evidence so he’s still under my list of suspects!” oh my Jesus Christ this is gonna be the day I get arrested for murder isn’t it?

“Barnaby…you have exactly five seconds to run for your life so I highly recommend you get your affairs in order and kiss ya ass goodbye” oh hey look at that I didn’t yell at him! Well done me I’m so proud! “could you two quit trying to kill each other for 5 minutes?! We’re already late enough as is it and I ain’t explainin’ to the teacher why Buck’s outta it on the floor!” my f**kin god Steve just yelled! At me! why do I never have a camera when this s**t happens?  “Jeez, alright I’ll murder him later, calm your damn t*ts Rogers” and cue the sound of barely contained frustration in 3,2,1….

“I’m beginning to get the feelin’ that you don’t like me y/n” oh really? I wonder what gave that away “wow you catch on quickly don’t ya Barnaby?” by the looks of things I’m really doing wonders for his ego, buck’s head looks like it’s gotten smaller so the risk of him turning into a hot air balloon’s gone down. The feeling of a pair of eyes glaring at the back of my head once again reminded me that the blonde boy was quickly getting tired of our crap, my worst fears were confirmed once I met Steve’s surprisingly intimidating glare…how he manages to be both adorable and beyond f**king terrifying is a mystery to me. “Okay I’m comin’ just stop staring at me like I just murdered your kitten!” and the little s**t has the nerve to smirk and look pleased with himself, ugh he’s been hanging ‘round me and Bucky too long that’s for sure.

“Ya know Buck and you are gonna be the death of me” right do I be offended or pleased with that statement? “actually, if anything it’s gonna be the pair of you that send me to an early grave cause god knows the both of ya don’t know how to stay outta trouble” two muffled sounds of protest came from my left and from behind me, “what’s that supposed to mean?!” once again the point has been missed “do you really wanna know the answer to that? I’ve got my report and presentation ready on how you two are a pair of numpties”.

Maybe that was a tad harsh…okay wait never mind it seems I’ve learned how to fly again with the assistance of one James Buchannan Barnes. “this is coming from the girl who can’t walk five feet without fallin’ over somethin’?” as much as I hate to admit it the walking embodiment of frustration and annoyance has a point “what you call fallin’ I call floor hugs, now how about you pUT ME DOWN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!” wait when did Steve walk off? See this is what happens when an overgrown ape demands attention. I don’t even have to look at Buck to know he’s givin’ me that look that says, “what the hell?” and “I’m not surprised by this” at the same time, “Nah I don’t think that’s gonna happen doll” the temptation to kick ‘im where the sun doesn’t shine is too much to bare for me at this point. “And you wonder why I love Steve more that you” Buck’s face kinda looked like someone just shoved a whole lemon in his mouth, I’m almost certain that he woulda dropped me on my ass if it wasn’t for the fact that Steve came over and dragged us both through the gates of hell.

This is gonna be so much fun!……said no-one ever.  

Okay…maybe it didn’t suck as much a thought it did, hopefully my skills as a writer will come back for the next couple of chapters XD Thanks for reading ! :)

Rose xxx

[ravenbell-exchange]

Here come the prompts!

These are for all of us to use, so please feel free to peruse, reblog, explore, comment, and be generally delightful. Everyone will be receiving their assigned prompts later today, but remember that we are writing two stories each: one from the assigned prompts, and one from this list. You are free to pick anything apart from stuff you yourself prompted. There haven’t been any Dear Author letters I’ve spotted so far, so I’ve included some additional crossover prompts from people here, just for ease of reference. You absolutely don’t have to pick them - there’s just there in case you want them!

If you didn’t sign up for this challenge, but want to use any of the prompts below to write a fic – go for it! As long as you make sure to credit where you got the prompt from, you are very welcome to play with us.

Now, without further ado:

1.

Url: @autobot

Prompt 1: Sports AU: Bellamy and Raven flirt while their respective teams yell at them to get their head in the game.

Prompt 2: Delinquent Winter: It's snowing, so the delinquents decide to start a snowball fight. Raven and Bellamy really go at each other. Bellamy ends up getting a cut on his lip from an icy snowball, and Raven decides to remedy that with a kiss.

Prompt 3: Season 7: This is pretty vague but just anything with the relationship Bellamy/Raven/Doucette, with Bellamy having had separate relationships with the other two in the past.

Prompt 4 (optional variation on 1): HP AU: Bellamy and Raven flirt while their respective Gryffindor and Ravenclaw Quidditch teams yell at them to get their head in the game.

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: Momma didn't raise no wussy "N/A"

Also: Have seen all 7 seasons.

2.

Url: @growlereish

Prompt 1: post mount weather road trip. monty, miller, lincoln, gina, octavia, harper welcome to come too. maybe they find a bunch of cars and the delinquents take off into the sunset together. maybe it's just bellamy and raven exploring the world together.

Prompt 2: au where they're on a sports team together. any sport, the sport is not important, it's about the Team As Family and the Narratives

Prompt 3: fantasy au or canon + fantasy elements

Prompt 4: relationship negotiation / exploration

Prompt 5: anything from the expansive list of likes on my dear creator letter: https://growlery.dreamwidth.org/11097.html

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: somnophilia; humiliation, especially as a kink; d/s that's about punishment; discussion of diets/nutrition plans/exercise regimens/body maintenance/weight management/etc

Also: Have seen up to + including 3x08

3.

Url: @kinetic-elaboration​

Prompt 1: High school AU: Bellamy and Raven are exes, but Raven is still good friends with Octavia, so they still see each other all the time

Prompt 2: Bellamy/Raven/Gina negotiating/figuring out a poly relationship in Arkadia pre-S3

Prompt 3: Braven + First real, heavy snow on the ground (canon or canon-divergent AU)

Prompt 4: Librarian!Bellamy and Mechanic!Raven

Prompt 5: Modern AU: Bellamy, Raven, and author's choice other delinquents living in a cramped apartment together; Raven and Bellamy are either struggling with UST or in a secret relationship or FWB arrangement

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: pregnancy/kid fic of any sort; side/background Minty, Marper, or Clexa; explicit sex (implied/fade to black/generically described is ok); character bashing of any kind

Also: Have seen season 1-4 (really do not want to write/read anything related to the timeskip on, please!).  I'm not really into the Grounders generally; I love the delinquents; I headcanon Raven as bisexual but Bellamy as straight.

4.

Url: @justbecauseyoubelievesomething​

Prompt 1: Sci-fi/Space AU where Bellamy and Raven serve on the same ship; (fr)enemies to lovers with lots of angst along the way! Time loop/travel or interdimensional travel shenanigans would be appreciated as well!

Prompt 2: Dark Fairytale/Fantasy AU; very dark, stormy, foresty vibes; one of them is some sort of mythical creature, maybe even ruler of other mythical creatures; dark forbidden romance; for lots of bonus angst, one of them can be a magical creature hunter and reveal themselves at the end!

Prompt 3: Canonverse Ark AU; Bellamy and Raven meet as adults on the Ark because they both join the same secret revolutionary group planning to overthrow Alpha Station; other Delinquents can definitely make appearances!

Prompt 4: Modern AU; one of the two is driving through a small town trying to get home for Christmas when their car breaks down and they are forced to take it to the town's only mechanic; they snark at each other before the mechanic invites the stranded party to Christmas dinner; found family; fluff; basically you're typical Hallmark-esque set-up.

Prompt 5: Any setting! Bellamy and Raven are rivals in some sort of extreme sport (or if set in canonverse can be something like spacewalking). They're constantly pushing each other to their limits trying to beat each other, until Raven permanently injures her leg. She becomes very bitter during her recovery until she realizes that Bellamy isn't competing anymore and confronts him. Maybe feelings come out right away or maybe it takes them a while to get around to realizing it, but lots of angst and hurt/comfort during the build-up!

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: Explicit smut; pregnancy/kid fic; incest; student/teacher; character bashing of any other characters

Also: Have seen seasons 1-6 and the first half of season 7.

5.

Url: @ravenbells

Prompt 1: Raven discovering and enjoying the fact that Bellamy is a huge history nerd (can be canon, modern or some kind of fantasy/sci-fi setting).

Prompt 2: Modern AU. Raven is sharing a flat with friends, but one of them has to move out because of Reasons, and Bellamy rents the freed up room. Doesn’t have to be set in the US if you don’t want to, I don’t care that it’s an American show.

Prompt 3: Grounder AU, but set in the past. Bellamy and Raven were children when the nukes that caused the Ark to stay in space for generations went off. Now they are they first generation of survivors who have to build a life in a world without technology.

Prompt 4: Steampunk AU. Can be traditional Victorian-aesthetic steampunk, but if you want to lift your visuals from any other time period, be my guest. I’m going to love anything you do.

Prompt 5: Bellamy and Raven are exes who get back together (can be canon or any AU setting you can imagine).

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: Graphic violence

Also: Have only seen the first 2 seasons, please have mercy. If you want to incorporate the characters playing DnD into any of the stories, be my guest - just putting this in here because I know some people in the group love it (Bellamy would play a paladin, fight me), but if you’re not into this stuff, absolutely don’t feel obliged.

6.

Url: shortitude @ AO3

Prompt 1: Modern coffee-shop AU where they meet because both of them has a Specific Table they like to sit at and usually their schedules do not coincide, but then because of fate (someone's wi-fi broke, there's plumbing work happening at home, etc) they have to go to the coffee shop and their table is taken, as are all the others. Luckily, the traitor who took their Specific Table is willing to share it, just for today. (And then every day after.) Friends to Lovers is preferred over Instant Attraction in this one. Even open-ended works. (Please, no pandemic.)

Prompt 2: Canon-based AU: Give me cottagecore survival to replace the weird plots that happened to this show after s2. The idea of the Delinquents settling in a village, life moving on, peace being brokered, etc etc. In the middle of it all, Bellamy and Raven rely on each other to rebuild, and fall in love. A lot.

Prompt 3: Five times Bellamy tried to show his love for Raven and failed, and one time she finally got the point. Oblivious That People Might Love Her!Raven is my tragic and problematic fave. A bonus: competence kink. Acceptable: any form of AU; I am not a stickler for canon.

Prompt 4 (optional): Pacific Rim AU; veteran Jaeger pilot gets pulled back into action because of a need to pull off a last fight against the apocalypse/alien invasion, drifts unexpectedly with the supermouthy, supersmart, very capable engineer/mechanic. Add as many characters from The 100 as you'd like into this, but I am very much more into the wholesome survival of all of them than I am about everyone except Braven dying.

Things they don’t want to find in the fic you write for them: Bellarke content if the Braven content is just a way for Bellamy to "get over" Clarke, be it failed relationship or unrequited one.

Also: Have seen season 1 and Season 2 in full; vaguely familiar with STUFF about how they ended up in space, and nothing beyond that because I literally don't care.

[riceccakes]

Earth, Wind, and Coffee: Chapter Two Analysis

chapter one analysis

welcome back to another installment !! idk if many people are reading this, but i enjoy analyzing my writing so i’m gonna keep doing it :) let’s get started, shall we?

some fun stuff before we start!

the first scene i wrote for this story was the dock scene

usually, when i write, i kind of just start with whatever is the first thing that comes to mind. i’d had the bulk of the story outline in my head, not written yet, but i knew i wanted this reveal about the red lotus attack. so i started with it and wrote as far as i could before deciding i should start the beginning of the fic. most of the original content is there, with some stuff added on, but i took a turn from my dialogue as it didn’t fit the narrative of the story anymore (well get to this point in a later chapter analysis, don’t worry)

not me being heavily inspired by LOVE WITCH by bisexualyoda

around the time that i started this fic and was really writing for it, i found this story on ao3 and literally read whatever chapters were out at that time in a day. it was a story that also influenced me to write in asami’s pov, as a majority of the story is from hers. (this isn’t the only reason tho, but bisexualyoda is a writing god and what else could i do but try to honor them?) it’s a stellar korrasami fic that you should read if you haven’t yet and if you haven’t yet, what are you doing, please go enjoy that masterpiece

and into the chapter we shall go:

i kinda thought it was cool to play off this idea of a barista who can’t sleep but it’s not because of the coffee like you’d expect. 

now, being a diehard korrasami fan, i knew i wanted to apply this to my girls. and, i knew from the get-go i wanted korrasami to meet as if it were more book four, where korra has gone through something really terrible and asami is a really good friend who’s there for her. so i thought it might be cool to put the two together and korra is a barista who can’t sleep. then it was getting to what exactly the trauma was that korra experienced. i didn’t want anything as severe as what korra went through in the series (our poor girl was wrongfully put through the wringer for four seasons) but i wanted something that would stick with her and still haunt her, even after a period of time. my favorite book is book three and i loved the red lotus antagonists, so i played around with their concept and turned it into what’s in the story. i was really pleased when i came up with this and only made some minor changes (i had originally explicitly given korra insomnia. i decided to change this and keep it more ambiguous because i didn’t want to inaccurately describe insomnia and somehow offend anyone who does experience it, i hate doing that) and then i was set to really start the fic.

more about povs:

so, when i first started writing this fic, the idea of multiple povs was an option. in the end, i chose only asami, for a number of reasons, but mostly for one in particular

just like asami, i wanted you guys to gradually learn about korra’s situation. sure, i could’ve went through korra’s pov and been all secret secret about it, but something about that idea doesn’t sit well with me. i liked the idea of gradual connection and in turn concern. i sprinkled some little stuff here and there, to hint that something’s up, but i feel like that’s the hook for you lil fishies to grasp onto. even in that very dock scene, i don’t give it to you right away; i dance around it, just like korra does by talking about tenzin and the temple and i mention the water and korra’s jacket and anything but the reason why korra’s called asami at 2 in the morning to come see her. this kind of tension, this kind of urgency to know what’s going on, i just don’t think would’ve been achieved had i had alternating povs.

something i really love about this chapter is how the first section and third section ends

Makeshift Boardrooms ends with korra being a complete angel and going above and beyond for asami and this presentation:

Asami is speechless. Inside, the tables and chairs have been set up as if it’s a long boardroom, fit with the donuts in the center of the table no one can ever reach. At the far end, a projector screen is set up and a loading screen is displayed on it. Asami stares at the girl, unsure of how to convey how appreciative she is for the gesture.

“Korra…”

“I know,” she quickly speaks up, her fingers behind her back fidgeting even faster, “it’s a lot, but I thought you should get the best kind of practice! And, we hosted a movie night here a while back, I wasn’t sure if Tenzin left all the equipment here but I found it all in one of the cabinets in his office and I,” she’s looking at the ground now, “is it all right?”

“All right?” Asami questions, truly confused as to how Korra could say such a thing. She reaches out, slowly, gently, placing her hand on Korra. The girl’s hands fall to her sides, Asami’s fingertips slowly linger down from the bundled fabric of Korra’s rolled up sleeve to her forearm.

now, A Turn of Events ends like how we know:

Asami falls back onto the couch, ill prepared for the unexpected burst. Korra continues huffing, gasping for air, clutching at her chest and running a hand through her hair. Asami reaches out again and that’s when Korra flinches again. She starts to sob.

“Korra…”

“Get out!”

Asami sits, staring. She isn’t sure if she heard right or not. Korra begins shaking, sobbing inconsolably. Asami just wants to reach out.

“Get. Out!”

Asami grabs her things and rushes towards the door, taking one final glance behind her shoulder. Korra’s hands cover her face, her body flinches and shakes, her sobs ring loudly in Asami’s ears. 

In between each desperate gasp for air, she can hear Korra whisper, “Please, please, stop, stop, please, stop, please.”

Asami feels her heart sink and she opens the door to leave.

i’ve bolded what i love most. it was actually unintentional, i’d only noticed after i finished the chapter and was reading through to edit, but it’s kind of beautiful, bittersweet even. there are parallels here, some less noticeable than others, but parallels nonetheless. the lingering of korra’s name is direct and the events after are strikingly different but in a way connected. in Makeshift Boardrooms, after the mention of her name, korra is sputtering word after word. in A Turn of Events, after the mention of her name, korra only says two words. it’s two sides of the same coin, showing how korra is unfortunately spiraling out and losing control of what’s going on with her. typing it out is kind of hurting me, seeing how korra’s in pain, but im the author and i know what happens later so i shouldn’t worry too much.

now getting onto asami in this section, still, the lingering of korra’s name is the most noticeable parallel. but, in Makeshift Boardroom, after korra responds, asami reassures the girl with physical touch, she’s able to reach out to her. in A Turn of Events, after korra responds, asami doesn’t react, she doesn’t know how to. korra’s in front of her, clearly in pain, and she just yelled at asami, and still asami just wants to reach out to her. once again, unintentional that this happened, but sometimes it’s the unexpected things that turn out for the best. the diction i have here, in repeating the word reach, i think it just further drives home how heartbreaking this chapter’s turned out to be. (shout out to the section title, cause things really did take a turn here) it had all seemed so good, korra was opening up to asami, they were getting closer, and then all of a sudden BAM korra has a panic attack and in a moment of utter fear, she pushes away asami. i know i put angst in the ao3 tags, but now going over it as the author, i see my angst has really gone above and beyond, but hey, i really liked how this chapter turned out

honorable mentions:

in LOVE WITCH, asami and kuvira are basically besties and i loved the idea of their friendship and i wanted to have a go at it myself! finding kuvira’s place in the story, however, was a lil tough to navigate, but when i came up with the bodyguard idea, i really liked it. i hope you guys do too :))

idk if you guys noticed but outside formal fic/writing settings, i pretty much only type in lowercase. however, i do type in complete sentences and the only abbreviation i really use is idk so don’t mind me lowkey projecting onto korra here. anyways, i know most phones have the default setting for texts to be first word already uppercase. i have mine turned off but figured korra would have hers on cause 1) she prefers it this way and 2) even if she wanted to turn it off, she doesn’t know how to. plus, i liked the idea of her enjoying emoticons better than emojis. i love emojis but i always do a lil sideways smiley ( :) ) and to me it’s super cute and i’m sure korra would see it the same way

the end of this chapter is not what i had first intended! truth be told, i didn’t know what exactly was going to happen at the end of the chapter, but i knew what would happen after it, i just needed a bridge. in my og timeline, i had a couple different options: the one i almost went through with was asami suggesting they move into together (which is admittedly super soon and super fast so like, it would scare off korra), another was something intimate that would still scare korra off (this one wasn’t too elaborated on, perhaps a forehead touch, or super close faces, idk. obviously this doesn’t happen, but it had been in consideration), i’d actually even considered something physical, but that was quickly cut off the list, as that is NOT how i wanted this story to go. anyways, because of how this chapter ended, the whole rest of the story changed and i couldn’t be happier.

anything i would’ve wanted to change?

im still super self conscious about the length but at the same time, also not, idk how to describe it. anyways, i think what i actually would’ve liked is keeping something from the Home Life section i took out. when i first wrote it, asami actually had a desk mate and he was flamboyant and sassy and i loved him. looking back now, i would’ve loved to have kept him and the scene with him, but i took it out cause i was scared the chapter was too long. after reading everyone’s comments though, about how they don’t care how long chapters are/longer chapters are better, i gave myself some more slack with the last chapters. his name was ryuichi, rip ryuichi

surprise epilogue is out now too, so enjoy the rest of the fic! if you have any questions, feel free to ask :)))

[barrysjumpsuit]

blindsided - oc (barry’s sister) x rafe cameron (ch.6)

series masterlist  • series playlist

wc: 3.1k

synposis:  christy is a lifelong resident of the outer banks. after a series of hookups with rafe cameron, kook royalty, she’s smitten. what she doesn’t know is about what her boyfriend and brother are involved in behind her back

warnings: use of guns, cannabis use, verbal/physical abuse and violence, cigarette use

a/n: the last chapter! i might have write up an epilogue if anyone wants one?? this was so fun to write and i don’t have any works in progress so please send me requests!

---

Rafe threw his truck into park, and stumbled out onto the tall grass. He was surprised he made it all the way to the Cut, with his pounding headache and waves of anxiety, panic, and fear that shook his body. The previous night’s events were too fresh on his mind.

He remembered seeing the cop, her gun pointed at his father. Then his father in handcuffs. Then John B was blaming his father for awful, horrible things. For killing his father, for stealing gold. 

Rafe’s brain was already off from withdrawal. That much was obvious to him - he had hit Christy, he had destroyed his bedroom. 

Rafe had destroyed himself.

He hardly realized that he pulled the trigger until it was too late, until Peterkin was laying on the ground, blood pooling around her. Rafe had hardly registered the yells and screams around him, and instead, blindly obeyed his father, telling him to return home, that he would handle it.

From there, he learned his father blamed John B for the whole incident. Rafe had found Topper and then Kelce, caught up in the manhunt, distracting his brain and fueling his rage.

And somehow, someway, here Rafe was, needing to escape his mind.

“Barry,” he called, pulling open the screen door into the living room. “Barry,” he repeated.

Barry was doubled over, doing a line. He sat up as he finished, snorting and wiping his nose before he answered. “Heyyy, what’s up, Country Club?”

“I need cocaine, Barry. I… I need it.”

“Ay, you lied to me, and I don’t like it when people do that. And, that was it right there, brother.”

Rafe could feel his body and mind weaken at Barry’s words. He tore through the trailer, opening cabins, stumbling down the hallway and into Barry’s room, trying to ignore Christy’s bedroom right across the hallway. “That’s bullshit, Barry!” he yelled, throwing open Barry’s closet doors.

“Yo, get out of my room!” Barry said, grabbing Rafe and throwing him back into the hallway.

 He stumbled down onto the floor in the kitchen. “Barry.... Barry, I fucked up.” 

Rafe could hear his labored breaths, and feel himself shaking.

“Hey, you’re good, you’re good, dog,” Barry was saying. “I’m sure you did, Country Club,” Barry continued, his voice almost a purr as he pulled out a chair and sat down in front of him. “But I can assure you, I’ve done worse. But y’know, my sister isn’t very happy with you.”

Rafe grasped at his hair, Barry’s words crushing him even more. He was crying, but didn’t care. “Barry… I did… something, and now I’m fucked, and like... for life, and I can’t get out of it.”

“My sister know about whatever it is you did?” Barry asked, and Rafe shook his head. “Hey, don’t come here telling me there’s no way out, because that’s a lie,” Barry was saying. “What you need to do is you need to nut up, bro. I got a big fuckin’ problem here, Rafe, you see me crying about it?” Barry fake cried, and Rafe glared at him, anger and adrenaline coursing through him. “No. Rafe, I ain’t got no money, them kids took it. But one of them kids got a twenty-five g reward on him. You help me out, I help you out, I can’t get no more product until I get some money.”

“John B,” Rafe whispered. He looked up to Barry; he sat with his forearms leaning on the back of the chair, grinning. 

“That’s the one,” Barry said, leaning forwards towards Rafe. He could smell his breath. “And when they get him, he’s gonna start snitchin’. On me, on you, on your girlfriend, and I don’t want that happening, cause we’ll all be fucked. What about you, Country Club?”

“No…”

“That’s gonna happen unless we get to him first. So how about we go get him?”

---

“What?”

Christy was still on the ground, shaking. She could feel her nose and lip bleeding, the gravel digging into her skin. 

“Someone’s in trouble,” Barry grinned, and Rafe kicked him again.

“Rafe!” Christy screamed, grabbing onto his legs, trying to wrestle him to the ground. 

“Baby, I swear, I didn’t mean to-” Rafe was saying, crying, shutting down. 

“But you did,” she just said, dumbly, in shock. 

It was at that moment that Christy realized she didn’t really know who he was. She had overlooked everything. He was a manipulative, violent drug addict. He had murdered a cop. He had kept so much from her, while she poured her heart out to him, and would have gone to the ends of the earth to help him, to make him happy.

She realized she was still clinging to his leg, and she crawled backwards, repulsed, to end up beside Barry. 

“Rafe… why?”

“She was about to arrest my dad,” he responded, his voice breaking, but she felt no sympathy. 

“So you fucking shot her?” Christy countered back, and she saw his face visibly break.

“I didn’t… I didn’t mean to, I wasn’t myself…” he was saying, breathless. 

“And you knew?” she asked Barry, shoving him roughly. 

“I’m not either of your all’s mother,” he said, raising his hands in surrender. “All I knew is that he needed something to take the edge off, and that I needed my money back from those kids.”

“I can’t fucking believe you two,” she spat, pushing herself away from Barry this time. Some blood came out of her mouth as she spoke. “So what’s your big plan now, huh? Barry, he got away, no reward money for you. Congratulations, Rafe, you’re a fucking murderer. So now what?”

She saw Barry and Rafe exchange a glance. Rafe was visibly shaking from the anger. 

“You’re a little team now? Barry, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

“I own him now,” Barry slurred, grinning.

In that moment, Rafe crouched, picked up his gun, and aimed it back at Barry. Christy reached to grab hers, but Rafe kicked it away, wagging a finger at her. 

“Rafe, if you shoot him, you know what’s going to happen? You’re going to jail.”

“Actually, Christy, I’ll be able to get out of here. You won’t be able to bring yourself to lay a hand on me. And if you rat to the cops, I’m going to rat right back about your operation,” Rafe said. The man in front of Christy was completely foreign, one she had never met before. “It’s your word against mine, and I don’t think your criminal record will help you out.”

He was right. 

“So I can do whatever the fuck I want,” Rafe finished, gripping the gun tighter.

---

Rafe remembered when he sobered up the first time.

It was the hardest thing he’d ever done. 

That was the first time he ran to Christy. There had always been something between them, but he was too scared to admit it to anyone, even himself. Topper would shun him, Kelce would insist he could do better with literally any kook. Rafe knew that Christy wasn’t an ordinary pogue.

They had interacted a few times before. At keggers, when they ran into each other at Barry’s place. He didn’t fail to notice her lingering glances, but she never made a move.

Rafe was drunk the first night they hooked up. They were at a kegger at the Boneyard, Christy slinking throughout the mass of people handing out joints. She wasn’t drinking, just a little stoned, mellowed out and laughing freely. Her dark hair fell in loose waves around her shoulders, the navy blue of her bikini top almost blending in with the dark seawater.

Topper went home with Sarah, and Kelce with his girl, leafing Rafe alone. It was shitty of them, and they knew it. Rafe couldn’t be trusted alone, especially in his current headspace. 

So he made a move. He sought out Christy. So few things brought him pleasure those days, and he knew what he wanted. 

She seemed surprised. She agreed to go home with him. She drove his truck back to his place, because she didn’t think going to her place, with Barry, with the drugs, was a good idea. She made sure he wasn’t going to get sick, she made sure he used protection.

Christy was there for him. Every step of the way. In the morning, he pushed her away, realizing who he had hooked up with. A pogue, his ex drug dealer’s baby sister. 

But still, she came back for him when he needed her. She made him feel good, like he could do anything, without the drugs.

When Rafe was finally clean, out of the “withdrawal” phase, he pushed her away. He had his eyes set on tourons and other kooks. He could get anyone he wanted, without the strings Christy had attached to her. After almost a year, he realized that it was those strings he liked: he liked being with someone totally unlike him, someone whose entire life was dedicated to those she loved, and he liked being someone she loved.

That night at Topper’s house, when Rafe saw her, his heart skipped a beat. He had seen her around since they had hooked up, and he started wanting her back in his life more and more. 

That night at Topper’s house, he knew he had to make the jump.

He watched her all evening. Do her normal thing. Fake flirt just to make a deal. Exaggerate her laughs and her smiles. Rafe could see right through it all, that she just wanted to get out of here. When she wandered away to her two friends, lighting a joint, Rafe knew it was time.

The rest was history.

She poured her heart out to him, and him to her. When Rafe was with Christy, it was like he was living a life he had never lived before. He didn’t have to worry about impressing his father, because to Christy, he was already perfect. 

Rafe knew, deep down, he was using her. Just like when he was using drugs. He just couldn’t bring himself to admit it.

---

“Rafe,” Christy said. She was aware of how weak her voice sounded. “You can’t shoot him. You never would.”

“Shut up!” he yelled, this time, waving the gun towards Christy. “You don’t know me!”

The gun was on her, and she was frozen. It wasn’t the first time she had been in this position, but it was the first time it had been with someone like Rafe. 

“I know you better than you think,” she replied. “Rafe, I know you hate your life, and I know you can’t bring yourself to fucking shoot the two people who work to make your life better. Without Barry, without me, where would you be?”

Suddenly, Rafe grabbed the front of Christy’s t-shirt and pinned her against his truck. Barry yelled something, but Rafe kicked him, and pressed the gun to the bottom of Christy’s jaw.

“Barry, you move, your sister’s dead!” he yelled. Christy met her brother’s frantic eyes before returning to Rafe’s. He leaned his face towards hers, his lips peeled back in a snarl. “You don’t know me.”

A split second was all it took. 

Barry threw himself onto Rafe, the gun firing. Christy dropped to the ground on her stomach, the gravel digging into her stomach, grabbing her discarded gun and levelling it towards Rafe from where she was laying.

Rafe was the only one standing. Barry had a hold of his gun, training it on him, grinning wickedly despite the blood dripping down his other arm, which he held close to his body.

“Rafe, you get the fuck out of here, and our mouths are shut and yours better be too,” Christy said with an unnerving calmness, shooting Barry a look. He glared back at her but didn’t argue. “And I never want to see you again.” 

There was a long period of silence and no movement from anyone. Rafe was visibly evaluating his options. Then, he moved, Barry and Christy’s guns following him until he climbed back in his truck and drove away.

Both Christy and her brother stayed on the ground, stunned. It wasn’t until then that she realized how badly she was shaking, dropping the gun back to the ground in disgust.

“Hey, Chris,” Barry said, pulling her out of her trance. He was sitting ten feet from her, his hand pressed over his bloody arm. 

“You good?” he asked as she looked over at him, and she nodded, but was still unable to move, processing everything that had happened in the past five minutes.

Rafe pulling up. Pulling a gun on Barry. Pointing a gun at her. He hit her, he threatened her, and told her he killed Peterkin, pressed a gun to her head. The look he had in his eye was foreign - it wasn’t the Rafe she knew. She had told herself she would stay with him through his best and through his worst, but she never realized he could stoop so low.

Christy had known, deep down, that Rafe was using her. At least that’s what happened the first time. But when he came back for her, there was something there. She had pushed those thoughts away, but they resurfaced too late.

Barry’s touch finally fully brought her back. She could feel the wetness of blood from his hand on her arm, and she shoved his hand away, looking at his arm. The discharged bullet had ripped through the inner muscle of his bicep.

“Barry…” she said dumbly, going to take off her shirt to press around it or tie it around it or do something to stop the bleeding. Her brother protested, but she shut him up with a quick “let me be the one to take care of you, okay?”

The words came out of her mouth without her even thinking, and Christy realized her ultimate flaw. She cared too much for everyone. Maybe it was from a lack of people truly caring for her, but she knew that a lot of her love for Rafe was due to the fact that he was broken and she was able to fix him.

Temporarily, at least.

You failed, her brain told her, but she pushed the thought away as her fingers were coated in blood from her brother’s arm. Christy knew he had been through worse when he was in the Army, but she didn’t care.

“Come here,” he coaxed as she finished tying the shirt around his arm. He pulled her into a one-armed hug, her face in his chest, and she cried.

---

That night, after walking back home with her brother and making sure his arm was okay, Christy packed a bowl and walked out to the end of the dock to watch the sunset. 

As she smoked, she thought about the constants in her life. There weren’t many. There was Barry, of course. That’s all she came up with at first. But then, she realized she loved where she lived, even if it meant existing on the same island as Rafe Cameron. She liked the sunshine that warmed her skin. She liked the waves she could escape in on her surfboard. She liked the shorebirds, hopping around the beaches terrorizing the tourons.

Those were things that would never go away. While there may be more Rafe Camerons in the future, or maybe someone better than Rafe Cameron.

As Christy laid back on the dock, she remembered her stoned thoughts from a few weeks before. The world is like a snowglobe. Agatha shook everything up. Most people settled, their lives back to normal. Some flakes rested precariously on trees, on houses, on people. They had a new vantage point, but gravity was always trying to suck them back down to the ground.

She remembered that she viewed herself as the snowflake, with Rafe as her pillar of support, but Christy realized that was all wrong. Rafe was the snowflake. Rafe was the one who was unstable, seeing the world as he never had before. With Christy, he was exposed to the rough and tumble life of those who lived on the Cut, packing weed into emptied-out cigarettes, spending nights in stuffy, humid trailers without electricity. Christy was his tree, holding him up, supporting him.

Rafe had fallen hard off that tree. 

He went back to old habits. Nothing had changed about him. He was continuously exploited by his father, wrapped up by the scandals that came with life as a kook, especially as a Cameron. Rafe had pushed her away, surrounding himself with people who lived the same life he did instead.

It was at this realization that Christy understood. She came to peace with herself. 

She stood, walking back across the dock. Barry had built a fire and was sitting in one of the beat-up lawn chairs, watching it. One arm was bandaged. One hand held a beer, several discarded cans laying on the ground beside him.

“The alcohol will thin your blood and make you bleed more,” Christy said flatly, sitting down in the chair next to him.

“You got any weed left on you, then?” he asked, his words slightly slurred. She knew he had an embarrassingly low tolerance, and handed him her pipe and lighter.

“Should still be some in there, I repacked it not long ago,” she said, but he was already coughing out smoke.

“You already over him?” Barry asked after he recovered. 

Christy looked at him through her hooded eyes and smiled, lighting a cigarette now that Barry had her pipe. “There’s nothing I could have done for that boy and nothing he would have done for me. Rafe Cameron is Rafe Cameron. I shouldn’t have been stupid enough to not see that.”

“You live and you learn, baby sister,” Barry said, raising the pipe up in a toast. She lightly hit her cigarette against it, taking a long hit. 

Nights like these were what she had as a constant in her life. People come and go, but Christy was always going to exist. What she realized now is that she could control who to give her love to. She would continue to love her brother, no matter how much he pissed her off. She vowed to continue to love herself, and not let any more toxic people in her life.

As Christy smoked her cigarette, she smiled to herself, knowing that she got something out of her time with Rafe Cameron. In reality, she and him weren’t that different.  Before Rafe, she was lost, just trying to find someone to love before chasing her next high, broken by their pasts.

But now, Christy knew who she was and where she belonged. She was a pogue from the Cut and proud of it.

--

taglist  @stargazingstarkey @letsgofullkook @ims0golden @ampanonyg @hoeforpankow @jjsmentalpolaroids @queenk00k @drewstarkey @obbx-tings @bricksatanakinswindow @sortagaysortahigh @prejudic3   @delinquentstarkey  @rudypankow-whore @drewxxrudy​ @jjmaybcnks

[yououghtaknow]

18 and 20 for the meta asks? also I already commented on clip 3 but fr this clip was so good that was such a good execution of that scene and s5 has been so good and literally brightens my day thank u 💛 i hope you’re doing well

hi, thank you so much!!!!!!!! i hope you’re doing well too <3 <3

i am putting a read more because i am a rambley person, but underneath you will find talks of unused plot points, the parallels between the girl squad and the lad squad, and what taylor swift album(s) i believe each season has the vibe of.

tw for discussion of abuse, mental health problems, addiction and eating disorders

18. Do any of your stories have alternative versions? (plotlines that you abandoned, AUs of your own work, different characterisations?) Tell us about them.

skam brighton has. so many aus. because it itself is an au of an original work. me and two of my great writing friends have written a great numbers of aus including but not limited to riordian-verse, glee, doctor who, rwrb, trc, a murder mystery au, and many aus based on comfort media of mine that i started on never finished (house of anubis, barbie movies, etc.). and many of them are unironically so good???? @fingersmithbysarahwaters and @nightwing642 are incredibly talented screenwriters. but also i did write a screenplay adaptations of the first two books in the raven cycle series and 2/3s of rwrb for no reason other than fun and autism.

as for skam brighton. oh boy. not many plot points have been changed, but some certain scenes/character moments were changed. for example, the scene in season 2 episode 8 where liz has a meltdown at the shopping centre and she has a heart to heart with mary was originally liz having a meltdown and running into al in the sensory room. but i wanted to hold back on revealing al as a main character until season 3. 

also in the og season 3, jake and al didn’t break up. as i was finishing the season, i was getting ideas for how i wanted the series to develop (james’s crush on al namely) so i thought it would be good for both of their developments for them not to end up together. also in season 3 i hadn’t planned for jake to move house originally, so there was a scene in the finale episode of the lad squad hanging out, but it got cut because it just didn’t make sense. 

in season 4, al and bree were a lot meaner to each other originally, because i love it when it gets busy at the brighton and the gay people get mean, but then i thought about it and decided it was out of character for both of them to be downright cruel. al and bree also had a scene in season 4 that was cut due to just not making sense. 

also, in season 5, the “inner white girl” scene originally wasn’t in the show at all, but one day i was listening to the song, and about a week before the episode came out, i wrote it. also, bree wasn’t written to be a she/they until literally the day of putting the clip out because i thought it would be cool. that’s it :)

also the way i write is that i write the full clip out in a google doc and then edit it in ao3 about an hour before i put it out, so a lot of changes happen there. just small things, like making dialogue flow better, changing certain songs because i just want to, and sometimes adding in new sequences that i just thought of.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

oh!!!! there!!!!! is!!!!! 

personally, my favourite thing to write is little symbolic moments that make me happy because i play 4d chess in my head with myself every time i write.

before i go off, i must say, so many hints and clues have been dropped for season six so far. season six has been my favourite season to write and i’m already planning a spin-off project based on it to write, and it’s gonna be starting sooner than you think.

so a piece of writing i’ve been thinking about lately is the parallels between the girl squad and the lad squad. before i begin to go off, these are the characters i think parallel each other the most.

jake - sandy james - bree nick - rori theo - esther al - liz

jake and sandy is quite an obvious parallel to draw - both are football players, both begin the series closeted and having a close relationship with bryan - but their personalities are quite similar. both of them are closer with their mother than their father, both use their relationships as a method of protection, and both are afraid of of societal rejection at the beginning of the series. they also both discovered their sexualities and mental health issues over the course of their seasons, and both of their love interests are more outgoing theatre kids. jake and sandy’s relationship is also so interesting to me - because they start as very awkward friends, and jake tries to help sandy by making bryan break up with her, but outs her in the process, and sandy doesn’t want to forgive him. she takes her time and comes to terms with it on her own and decides to forgive him because sandy’s just a sweetheart - and this also parallels the way jake takes his time to forgive his mother. also, in their friend groups, they’re both the newcomer to them, and we get the introductions to the group dynamics in their seasons, and in the later seasons, they’re both a lot more relaxed as they’re in recovery <3

james and bree are also very similar characters. both have problems with substance abuse, both have promiscuous reputations, both have both mommy and daddy issues. they are both dean girls, to put it in spn terms. they’re both very funny, and use humour to cover up their struggles. both are dealing with a lot of mental illness and, throughout the series, it becomes more and more clear. they’re also both seen as “the hot ones” of their groups, with a lot of the characters canonically having small crushes on them (liz, rori and nick with james; rori, esther and annabell with bree). they’ve also both canonically hooked up with sophie. which i just think is fun. they also played mimi and roger together, which i think shows their parallels as addicts and people (with roger struggling with recovery and depression until the end, when he begins to get help, and mimi living the high life until it all crumbles down around her). they also share a want for independence and both are very sana-esque characters (james being middle eastern and religious, bree being the cool rebel girl in season 1).

nick and rori are both the “fun friend”. they’re both comedic relief in the early seasons, but we do get in depth with them as the show goes on. in grease, they play james and bree’s love interests (which is ironic, as rori and bree get together and nick is in love with james), and in rent, they play angel and maureen, the two main comedic relief characters. both of them struggle to connect their asian identity with their british identity, and both struggle with how the world perceives them (nick with their gender presentation and rori with her eating disorder). they both struggle with toxic masculinity and toxic femininity and use humour to cover up their struggles.

theo and esther are similar in the fact that they’re the squad members we know the least about. they’re both jewish, they’re both the mum friend of their respective groups, they’re both autistic and they’re both quite nerdy. they’re the most grounded member of their respective groups and tend to take charge and help make decisions. they’re also both quite sarcastic and very firm in their opinions. 

al and liz are parallels simply because they are both nooras and vildes. they’r eboth autistic, they’re both the odd one out in their friend groups - liz being a lot more serious than the girl squad, al being a lot more in his own little world than the lad squad. they’re both very blunt and straight forward and say whatever they’re thinking.

also just some of my favourite bits of foreshadowing: nick being bitchy to liz throughout season 2 because they’re in love with james….. al talking about his sister to jake in season 3 and whenever al talks to the girl squad, bree insults him or walks away…… in season 4 episode 1, audrey mentions bree’s cousin is pregnant and then when bree finds out the results of her pregnancy test, oh no by marina plays (i’m now becoming my own self fulfilling prophecy)....... nick and all of his gender stuff throughout the series……. just all of the character stuff with grease and rent….. also just bree and rori’s whole relationship arc because it has everything. queerbaiting. subverting expectations. musical homoeroticism. a little cheating for fun. and they were best friends. honestly bree and rori season 3 is very august by taylor swift…… you weren’t mine to lose…….. 

speaking of, no one asked by here’s each season of skambr and the taylor swift albums they’re most like.

season 1 - debut/fearless

bro sandy is just such a debut/fearless era person. she’s looking for her place in this world!!!!!! she has the teardrops on my guitar energy (quite literally sandy pre-canon voice i bet he’s beautiful that boy she talks about and he has everything that i have to live without about bryan and sophie)..... the fun giggly crush songs that are deeply homoerotic….. esther season 1 voice the entirety of you belong with me. like esther really made a deeper connection with sandy in one month that bryan did in years of knowing her. sandy also is the type of person to stan love story, she just thinks it’s such a fun song and she does yell the key change every time it comes on. 

season 2 - speak now/lover

elizabeth!!!!! liz is the type of person who only liked old taylor and then got internalised misogyny and then got over it and loves taylor again. the story of us is canonically a liz/rori song…. yes i am still a liz/rori subtext warrior….. liz is very never grow up and dear john is a very her and james song in the fact that they both relate to it……. when they bonded over their trauma “don’t you think i was too young”...... also lover is a liz season 2 album because it’s about liz learning that love is the most important thing in the world….. liz voice i want to be defined by the things that i love. also the archer is just a skam brighton song because it is an isaac song. also i’m just gonna say it. i like me! it’s a good song when brendon urie isn’t in it, you all are just afraid of having fun. also though liz in season 5 is very better than revenge because, while her season is about unlearning your internalised prejudices, i believe she deserves to be misogynistic for 3 minutes 37 seconds.

season 3 - red

now this is controversial. this season is about depression, grief and anger, and these feelings are red. literally jake voice so you were never a saint and i loved in shades of wrong we learn to live with the pain mosaic broken hearts….. like treacherous….. holy ground….. the whole country pop vibe….. the bitchy songs mocking people’s perceptions of the singer…..  22 is a lad squad song…. also jake voice i remember it all too well but it’s about his father’s abuse and his mother’s neglect…… like the whole season is just jake getting to the point where he is at “begin again”. also i feel like jake would like red because he spent a lot of time watching taylor swift music videos as a youth both because he liked the music and had crushes on the guys in them, and he feels red is the perfect middle between the country and the pop and the indie and he just really likes being sad.

season 4 - reputation

bree big reputation holland!!!!!!!!! she has it all - the romantic drama, the hatred of men, the fucking homoeroticism. bree stans the reputation tour and they have made the entire holland-fletcher family watch it on their netflix (al fucking loved it because he’s a canon swiftie, audrey had a fun time, patrick was a little confused, but has the spirit). listen bree “i did something bad”. bree “look what you made me do”. bree and rori “new year’s day”. bree voice i swear i don’t love the drama, it loves me!!!!!!!!! like the reason the season has a lot of reputation songs and ends with daylight from lover is a metaphor for bree leaving their reputation era…. also reputation has she/they vibes

season 5 - 1989

1989 my best friend 1989!!!!!!! i am coming out here as a 1989 (deluxe) stan. it’s just a serotonin album for me and it is just so nick. the mocking songs about their reputation…… the genuinely deeply depressing homoerotic songs that have fun upbeat music…… the cars….. also clean is just such a nick song. he is in recovery, he is just so personal to me. also nick voice one night he wakes strange look on his face pauses then says you’re my best friend and you knew what it was he is in love!!!!!!! nick canonically in love with all of their best friends braxton!!!!! also nick feels like a 1989 stan because they just have those fun energies. nick WILL scream the spoken part of shake it off at the top of his lungs. also new romantic is just a skamverse song in general. also just. out of the woods. no reason for me to say it other than it’s one of my favourite songs of all time.

season 6 - folklore/evermore

no evermore is not out yet. yes i am claiming it for season 6. see taylor has said that these albums are all about telling stories/fairy tales and that’s what season 6 is about. i cannot wait until next friday when the main and my plans for the hiatus are revealed…….. genuinely i do not know how anyone perceives skam brighton so i don’t know who people think the next main is, but…… i can only describe the state of me writing this season as the various ambiguous disorder gifs.

[pamphletstoinspire]

September 15 - Today is the feast day of Our Lady of Sorrows.   Ora pro nobis.

Stabat mater dolorosa iuxta crucem lacrimosa, dum pendebat filius.

(At the cross her station keeping, stood the mournful mother weeping, close to Jesus to the last.) Jacopone da Todi (1230-1306)

We pray today to Our Blessed Mother, that through our joining with her sorrows, we may find the joy of eternal salvation with Jesus Christ, Our Lord. We look to Mary as a model of forbearance and endurance, obedience and meekness, love, patience, and joyful suffering.

OUR LADY OF SORROWS Fr. Francis Cuthbert Doyle, 1896

I. One of the Wise Man's most pathetic exhortations is, that a son should never forget the travailing and the sorrows of his mother. In order, therefore, that we may bear in mind the bitter anguish which lacerated our Lady's heart, we must reflect today upon that scene of woe in which her seven-fold sorrow culminated, in which the waters rose up around her, and closed over her head in a sea of anguish, such as never before flooded the heart of mortal man.

Jesus hung on the Cross, the outcast of His nation–a mark at which the vile rabble, and their still viler leaders, hurled their bitter taunts, and aimed their clumsy scorn. A galling wreath of thorns circled His head; His eyes were filled with blood; His hands and feet nailed tightly down to the cruel wood. The wickedness of a sinful world pressed heavily upon Him, and its ponderous weight well-nigh crushed Him Who upholds the universe. During His death agony, men scoffed and jeered at Him, taunting Him with impotence, and blaspheming Him most vilely; and all the while there stood by that death-bed of shame, Mary His Mother! He was Her Child; her blood flowed in His veins; her heart beat in unison with His. Those sacred features, now so sadly bruised and disfigured, were the exact counterpart of her own. That head, now crowned with thorns, had often nestled in her bosom. That tongue which now and then spoke through the darkness, had been taught by her to lisp its first accents. Between Him and her there had passed all that interchange of fond affection and tender love which takes place between a mother and the child of her bosom. Add to this the intense love with which she loved Him as her God, and we may truly say, there never could be love between mortal man and God greater than the love which existed between Jesus and Mary.

If, then, the natural effect of love is union, and if the greater the love the closer the union, we may form some idea of the agony which the sufferings of Jesus caused her heart. The thorns which made His temples throb with acute pain were as a circle of fire upon her brow. The nails which pierced His hands and feet fastened her also to His Cross. The foul language, the revilings, the scoffings, the blasphemies uttered against Him, were as a hail of fire upon her heart. Verily she was filled with His reproaches, and the revilings of them that reproached Him fell upon her. To what shall we compare her, or to what shall we liken the sorrow of this Virgin daughter of Sion? It is great as the sea. Who shall heal it? ‘O! all you that pass by the way, attend and see if there be sorrow like unto her sorrow.'

II. As we look at that ocean of sorrow, the bitter waters of which inundate her soul, we are forced to acknowledge that human words are but faint and inadequate symbols by which to indicate its depth and its breadth. Yet, though we may not be able to do this, we may at least turn our eyes with compassionate tenderness upon her, as she stands beneath the Cross, to see how she bears herself under its crushing weight, that so we also may learn how to suffer.

There are some to whom misfortune deals a blow so terrific that they are stunned and dazed by it. The insensibility which its violence produces, shields them from feeling the poignancy of the pain. It was not so with Mary. Though the magnitude of her grief surpassed all other human sorrows, yet she did not allow it so to master her as to make her swoon away, and thus be unable to feel the keenness of the sword which wounded and tortured her. Her grief, being calm and self-possessed, was on that very account all the more terrible, all the more bitter, because her mind fully adverted to all the circumstances which aggravated and brought it home more closely to her heart. Not one circumstance of those three cruel hours, during which the Saviour of the world slowly died before her eyes upon His Cross of shame, escaped her notice. Her chalice was indeed a deep and bitter one, but she drained it to the very dregs. She stood beneath that Cross!

Yet she was neither hard nor insensible. She sighed and wept, and would not be comforted; but her grief did not overwhelm her. Strong men had fled away from that spectacle. Some had turned away their eyes, that they might not witness the terrible anguish which that mutilated Victim endured. But Mary stood by Him to the end, and her tearful eyes looked up into His pallid face as it sank in death upon His breast.

O broken-hearted Mother! by the grief which then wrung thy maternal heart, by the fidelity which made thee stand by the Cross of Jesus, and bravely associate thyself with Him in His hour of ignominy and of pain, pray for us to God, that our hearts may be torn with true contrition for our sins. Mayest thou stand by us in the last hour of our life, and give us courage to pass through the portals of death to the feet of Our Judge.

III. From the sorrows of the most holy Mother of God, learn that all sorrow is the effect of sin. The first tears that ever dropped from the eyes of man were wrung from him by the bitter loss which he sustained on account of sin; and every tear that has since fallen, and gone to swell the tide of human woe, has had its origin in sin. Mary had never been guilty of sin. But sin seized upon and murdered her only Child; and therefore sin made her weep, we might almost say, tears of blood, upon the place dyed with the blood which she had given to Jesus Christ.

Look back at your life, and call to mind the numberless times in which you have sinned against your Lord. Each of these sins had its share in causing Mary's bitter tears. They helped to strike down that thorny wreath upon the brow of Jesus; to wield the cruel scourge; to dig through the delicate hands and feet; to murder Him upon the Cross. They gave nerve to the executioner's arm, and malice to the hypocritical Scribe, and words of scorn to the rabble that screamed and yelled around the Cross.

When, therefore, you contemplate the sorrows of our dearest Mother, fall upon your knees before her, look up into the face of your Saviour, smite your breast, ask pardon for having been the cause of His and of her sufferings; and promise that by resisting evil for the future, and by living a holy life, you will endeavour to blot out the evil of the past. If the merciful but just hand of God should chastise you for your sins by sending you sorrow to wring your heart with anguish, and to draw bitter tears from your eyes–Oh! lift up those eyes to the Cross on which Jesus hangs, beneath which Mary stands, and learn patiently to bear the trial. Weep with her over the work which your hands have done. Those tears are a sweet balsam to the wounds of Jesus; they are a consolation to the heart of His Mother; they are a health-giving fountain which will wash away the filth of sin, ‘and heal the stroke of its wound.' 

The Seven Dolours

Different sorrows of Mary have been honored in the Church’s history, but since the 14th century these seven have commonly been regarded as the seven dolours (sorrows) of the Blessed Virgin Mary:

The prophecy of Simeon The flight into Egypt The loss of the child Jesus for three days Meeting Jesus on the way to Calvary The crucifixion and death of Jesus Jesus being taken down from the cross Jesus being laid in the tomb. Manual of Devotions Translated by Fr. Ambrose St. John , 1861

Devotion to the Sorrows of our Blessed Lady dates from Calvary. The Apostolic Church clung round her whom Jesus had given to be its Mother, and ever remembered that it was amid the pains, the Blood, and the agonies of the Passion, that it had become the child of Mary–literally “the child of her Sorrows.” The chief characteristic, then, of the Church's first love to our Lady was a deep, tender, loving, and child-like devotion to her Sorrows, and the Apostolic age bequeathed this exquisite feeling to succeeding times. But it was reserved for the thirteenth century, in many respects the grandest period in the history of religion, to develop this intuitive aflection, by giving it, as it were, a form, and uniting those most attached to this devotion in a confraternity, strongly recommended by the Church, and richly endowed with indulgences, and other favours by the Supreme Pontiffs.

It was in the year 1234. that seven holy men of Florence, retiring from that city into the cloister founded a religious Order, under the name of the Servites, or Servants of Mary, whose especial object was to honour the Sorrows of the Blessed Virgin; nor was it long before Heaven miraculously proved that our Blessed Lord, the Man of Sorrows, was well pleased with this afifectionate devotion to her who had the most nearly and bitterly shared in His Passion.

This tender sympathy, and the consequent graces richly bestowed by Jesus and Mary, were however not to be confined to the cloister. A lay affiliation of the Servites of Mary was soon established; the habit, or scapular of our Lady of Sorrows, enriched with numerous indulgences, was eagerly sought after by thousands of all ranks. The Crown or Rosary of the “Sorrows” began to emulate the Dominican Rosary; in short, the Confraternity of the “Sorrows,” like the great Society of Mount Carmel, spread through Christendom, was in like manner encouraged by holy Popes, and in like manner drew down the favours of God, and the blessings of Mary, on untold thousands of rich and poor.

The great object of this Society is to nourish a loving sympathy with our Blessed Mother in her sufferings, and with her, and through her, to unite ourselves with Jesus bleeding and dying for us.

Those who wish to practise this devotion may be divided into two classes:

1st–Those who wear the black Scapular and receive her Crown or Rosary, and join from time to time in the Offices and devotions of her Sorrows.

2nd–Those who, in addition to the above, become enrolled members of the confraternity, with a good intention of regularly observing its rules.

It is with sincere pleasure, and heartfelt gratitude, that we have seen this beautiful devotion established in this country. It has lately been regularly organized as a canonical Confraternity at St. Patrick's, Soho, London, where the first Feast of the Seven Sorrows has been solemnly kept. Of this we are certain, that in proportion as we, the Servants of Mary, compassionate her sufferings and meditate on her great Sorrows, while thus our love for her grows daily “more and more,” so also will our love for Jesus crucified still more continually increase. Private devotions will multiply, public Offices will be more regularly and more devoutly attended, and, as we confidently believe, Mary will show us a grateful love, and, with her own most marvellous blessing, will bless those who, by compassionating her Sorrows, show themselves the most truly to be her children, and give the sweetest consolation to her afilicted heart.