#we stan alfred

[sanctumsfw-blog]

DC GIVE US BACK OUR ALFRED

DC = "disregard canon" 😒

Prev tags: #i need that it would boost my morale #bruce moodily snatched it back #mumbling that they messed up the fur #alfred would be appalled at that and their language #bruce secretly loves it and keeps it in his room for when he has nightmares #bruce is cheering with them on the inside #he’s like ‘holy shit alfred teddyworth’ #he brings it home and puts it next to the batcomputer #the batkids go buck fuckin’ wild for alfred teddyworth #the entire JLA adopted alfred when they met him #they love him so much #j’onn you are such a sweetheart never change #build-a-bear alfred #he is the new leader of the JLA #he has a place of honor at the meeting table and it’s never explained to newbies #emotional support teddyworth #100% would become the JL mascot #like one of them comes into the watchtower in a bad way and someone will go ‘do you need alfred?’ and they’ll sit and cuddle the bear #the young justice (having finally gotten to the watchtower) find alfred teddyworth in a display case saying ‘break glass in emergency’ #batman refuses to hug teddyworth because everytime he’s slightly broodier than usual the JL shove the bear his way #kal is cheering because there’s finally a form of alfred that can’t/won’t kick his ass... hopefully #(let’s be real the bear would also kick his ass) #alfred fuckin’ teddyworth makes time for hugs and also justice

This isn't even a goof it's just a cute thing

[byclairs]

i just think that if you truly believe barely any bylers dislike/vilify el then you’re just turning a blind eye and being naive on purpose

[smutinlove]

SSTOP WE KNOW YOUR ALFIE. IT'S YOU!!!!

I'm not him, dude. I swear. Okay..

[calimera62]

I literally can't trust anyone who dislike Alfred.

[mcnjushcge]

I don't hate canada, but I can't believe that aph china is less popular than him. Some fanfics portray canada as having more power than china 😬

PLEASE……..whichever one of you mayo monkeys is coming up with this shit and shamelessly publishing it I need you take off the stan goggles and ASK YOURSELVES…….does canada matter

[tinybubblesyay]

Oh it's not just you ghoulies, i saw no way home in theaters and the first scene with him on the highway, i was like: 'why's the octo-man kinda...'

As soon as i was able, i watched spiderman 2 and loved every second of it. Top 10 favorite movies. He's the most beautiful man ever, in my opinion.

Chappel Roan is right btw, asking random people for photos and hugs is not normal, and it is absolutely not normal to get angry if said random person tells you no. Can't believe people are arguing about that, touch grass and look at a tree or something

[righteousruin]

today’s bane appreciation hours go to that think in knightfall in which this man can mask his whole presence from both robin and batman but is instinctively aware of the moment the bat takes his mantle back from prison a city over 

[moonlightcycle571]

All the Batkids have their own favourite Superhero (that’s not Batman), but it comes as a surprise when Damian says his favourite is Captain Marvel.

Captain Marvel, after being put on ‘Robin Watch’ after Batman had to disappear in the Watchtower for whatever reason: so … what do you like to do?

Damian, who vividly remembers Dick telling him to play nice or he’ll tell Batman about the 364 cats he’s fostered with Selina: I … like Cats

Captain Marvel, who has no idea what normal kids do: Oh, me too! My best friend is a talking cat!

Damian, intrigued: … elaborate

Captain Marvel, already showing Damian pictures of Tawny: This is Tawky Tawny, he’s a magic tiger that sometimes live in the Zoo! He’s also my best friend 🥰💕😍💕😍💖💗💗💗💗😍😊🎉😊😍😍

Damian, already calling Selina: I would like to meet this Tawky Tawny.

Later, Batman would start to panic when he couldn’t find Robin, but then would be shown a picture from Instagram of Robin, Catwoman and Captain Marvel in Fawcette Zoo, specifically the tiger cage hugging a massive Bengal Tiger, captioned “the most civilised tiger you will ever meet”. The next picture is a picture with the three of them having tea with said Tiger in a suit.

Bonus

Dick, Superman’s Number 1 fan: Oh please, he’s obviously the most like me! Captain Marvel and Superman look like they can be BROTHERS

Jason, forever a Wonder Woman Stan: HA, I heard that he WAS Wonder Woman’s Brother

Tim, hiding all his Cap merch: Oh yeah, he’s nothing like Red Tornado, so I’m good

Steph: why wasn’t I invited to the tea party …

Barbara and Alfred, tracking Captain down: Don’t worry, we’ll be invited to the next one

Cass, sensing something is off: … new … brother????

If you see Batman sulking in the corner, you saw wrong. If Batman sulks harder when he realises Barbara and Alfred figured out Captain Marvels identity before him and refuse to share… you’re a fucking liar.

Bonus

Flash: …

Captain Marvel: …

Flash: so when do we get to hug the magic kitty

Captain Marvel: FOR THE LOVE OF-

Tawny, not even a week later: ✨I’m so popular✨

[enviedear]

Could you imagine just... life with Jason? You're considering buying a home so you snuggle up on the couch and watch House Hunters to learn about each other's taste in homes. Judging the outdated bathrooms and the layout of the furniture together. Of course Jason would want to give you anything, but baby, he is not maintaining a pool for you. You guys go furniture and you're sure the couch you want will fit. "It'll fit. I *measured*" "Babe, we live in a home that is at least 100 years old. Measuring means nothing." "It'll fit. - At home - "Okay, so it doesn't fit..." "I told you."

When a pipe is leaking and Jason is there assuring you he can fix it, but it has been weeks and he is ticked off because the leak keeps migrating and no matter what he does it KEEPS LEAKING, but he refuses to call someone for help. So you're forced to smuggle a plummer in the odd hours he isn't home and be like "dude. You gotta make this quick. My boyfriend can never know you were here." Then give Jason a kiss because yay! He fixed the leaking pipe! You need just a few items at the store. A quick in-and-out situation and Jason tags along lost minute. You're skeptical that he won't slow you down but so far you've made good time. He can reach the top shelve so you don't look silly climbing on the shelves which helps... until you stupidly walk near the book section and now you know you're never leaving. Maybe one time he gets really mad on a call or had a rough patrol and snaps (not at you) and just punches the wall. So now you have a random picture frame on the wall that does not fit the rest of your home, but it was the only one that covered the weird sized dent. Or his blood stained the floor so now there is an awkward rug in the hallway, but you don't want to have to explain the blood to your guests. Or when you're pregnant with your first child and your cravings at 3AM are bringing you to tears. Jason has literally looked everywhere in Gotham, but can't find the special edition ice-cream flavor you crave and he's freaking out a little bit. He has to go to Alfred and hope he can re-create it. (he can because I believe Alfred and do anything) I dunno. I like daydreaming and imagining what it would be like with Jason as I go through my day and watch other people. >///<

omg nonnie this was all so beautiful thank you thank you for sending this in!!

You're considering buying a home so you snuggle up on the couch and watch House Hunters to learn about each other's taste in homes. Judging the outdated bathrooms and the layout of the furniture together. Of course Jason would want to give you anything, but baby, he is not maintaining a pool for you.

STOPPPP!!! watching hgtv and all the shows—do we think he's a chip and joanna gaines stan? he can be a proponent for no pool but idc...mama wants her pool.

When a pipe is leaking and Jason is there assuring you he can fix it, but it has been weeks and he is ticked off because the leak keeps migrating and no matter what he does it KEEPS LEAKING, but he refuses to call someone for help. So you're forced to smuggle a plummer in the odd hours he isn't home and be like "dude. You gotta make this quick. My boyfriend can never know you were here." Then give Jason a kiss because yay! He fixed the leaking pipe!

YUPP! and then winter hits and a pipe bursts—you're snowed in with him and his aggravation toward your home's pipes. and the whole time he's muttering, "this worked last time..."

Or when you're pregnant with your first child and your cravings at 3AM are bringing you to tears. Jason has literally looked everywhere in Gotham, but can't find the special edition ice-cream flavor you crave and he's freaking out a little bit. He has to go to Alfred and hope he can re-create it. (he can because I believe Alfred and do anything)

this is so real because as a girl with a favorite ice cream flavor that was discontinued (jeni's lemon buttermilk) but truly—jason would just be such a sweet and dependable lover. he's not a perfect person, but i do think it'd be easy to build a perfect life with him <3

[dairy-farmer]

I admit it, I have been converted to a Beta Tim stan😔. So now, how about oblivious Tim not realizing he's being courted because why would alphas and omegas want to court a beta??

~~~~~~

Beta Tim being courted by his brothers and not noticing because even though he knows how Alphas and Omegas flirt and court, he's only ever seen it aimed at other Alphas and Omegas. Obviously none of them would be interested in a normal Beta.

Dick comes over to the Nest and starts cleaning up, doing dishes and laundry, and Tim just thinks it's his big brother being nice and helping him out... Even though it's a common way for Omega's to show interest in someone by tidying up that person's home, because it shows that they are interested in living there as well.

Jason is constantly checking in on him and offering to tend his injuries, and cooking for him. How nice that Jason is starting to act like a good brother and taking an interest in his health and well-being! All while Jason is doing a normal Omega thing of making sure their potential mate is kept healthy and fighting fit.

Damian keeps coming around and gifting him food and trinkets and little things that 'made me think of you', and offering to patrol with him. Tim, after he's done being suspicious, is touched that Damian is finally trying to bond with him! On the other side we have Damian indulging in his Alpha instincts and showing Tim that he's capable of providing for him with food and material goods, and protecting him from danger.

Bruce and Alfred are in the background making bets about when or if Tim's actually going to catch on before one of the boys breaks and just jumps him.

Maybe even a fun scene where all three of the boys show up at Tim's apartment at the same time and have a Spider-Man meme moment. Tim walks in and is like 'oh cool, family movie night?'. Dick suggests a random movie and Tim is completely oblivious to the glaring/shoving match going on behind his back as they try to figure out who gets to sit beside Tim. Everything is going well, if a little tense, until Tim points out how obvious it is that the Alpha and Omega in the movie are into each other, because they're doing such obvious courting rituals... The exact same things that Dick, Jason, and Damian have been doing for him.

Que a three-way incredulous glance, before a moment of realization that Tim really is that oblivious and all three of them nod together and pounce on Tim.

When all four of them stroll into the manor a few days later, with Tim covered in aggressive bite marks and still looking faintly dazed, Bruce just sighs and hands a smug Alfred a $20.

~❤️🦇

!!!! i love this!!!!! the subtle ways they show interest and the world building associated- like the concept of an omega tidying up your space to show interest because it means they'd like to live there as well is so good!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[seekingxanadu]

On the issue of Alfred being a bad dad to Bruce, of Alfred enabling Bruce's bad behaviors:

I think the problem is modern Batman writers made the mistake of making Alfred a father figure to Bruce. An elderly employee can call his much younger perhaps-about-to-die employer "son" but that doesn't make them father and son. So when they get cute with the "aw Alfred is Bruce's papa" narrative, they end up making Alfred's character worse. Alfred's most consistent take has been that he is an employee and it is most visible with or around his interactions with Dick. Alfred seems to think of Dick as Bruce's employee. Again, it is a mentality from the 30s-40s when it was very natural for rich men to collect strays - I'll give you room and board, you will earn your keep by working in my land/business; to Alfred, Dick becoming Robin was to support Bruce's Batman in the field.

But modern Batman writers have woobified Bruce. He's not just the 35-40 year old wealthy businessman, scion of an old wealthy family, who has collected vulnerable youngsters around him and offered them a safe place. In the 30s and 40s, a 35-40 year old man was expected to be mature and a familyman. In the 90s and after, a 35-40 year old wealthy man isn't expected to be that anymore. Then again, it was the period that started to de-age Bruce. Because Dick, his first ward, was already an adult now.

So DC needed to make Batman younger and at least, deflect the idea of Bruce being a parental figure to a 20 year old man. So we started getting Alfred being Papa to Bruce, of Bruce and Alfred forming a family unit blurring lines of parent and employee. BUT Bruce was also the vanity projection of these Batman writers - they don't listen to their papas, so why would Bruce. Bruce was not Alfred's son, Alfred should know his place as employee. So we get Alfred written as just loyal employee who looks at Batman's allies as people serving Bruce. If Jason gets "a good soldier" plaque, Tim and Damian got Robin suits to just go backup Master Bruce already. And Dick?

Dick is a curious case with Alfred. Alfred clearly cares for Dick like a son. There is more familial closeness between Dick and Alfred than between Jason, Tim, and Alfred. Alfred has known Dick since he came to the manor as an 8 year old. It's a boy Alfred can claim to have raised- or at least, fed, cleaned, housed, medicated. Alfred knows Dick has Master Bruce's back in the field. In this regard, Dick is Alfred's extension. Alfred serves Master Bruce in his civilian life, Dick serves Master Bruce in the field. To be clear, I am assuming Alfred's thought process. Not Bruce's or Dick's. Sometimes, it feels like Alfred considers Dick another Wayne servant, equal to Alfred's rank.

All this rambling to say, I think Alfred is used as excuse to limit any blame that Bruce deserves for his bad decisions.

Just like some writers and stans make Dick apologise for Bruce's violence against him; we are now using Alfred as smokescreen to excuse Bruce's actions.

I am, by no stretch, saying Alfred is blameless. But Alfred is an employee, an old man probably very possessive of the Wayne scion who had only Alfred along during his growing years, and he is standoffish as any butler.

This is also why the idea of Bat "family" is so flawed. They are not a family. They are a clan of allies. They are a disparate set of individuals operating under the Wayne umbrella. Alfred is not Bruce's papa. Dick and Jason are not brothers. Their time in Wayne manor did not even overlap. Same with Damian and Jason, Damian and Tim. Damian and Dick mirror Dick and Bruce of 20 years ago and those two dynamics are that of a familial unit (though Bruce breaks the tie with Dick multiple times).

[not-another-robin]

Next up on my quest to ship Alfred with every old person in the dc canon: Arnold Wesker no I'm not joking

[emo-batboy]

i'd like the chart thanks!

Also, there's another person who wants to rp Leo, can they?

Okay a few people are asking for the chart so here’s the current chart!! (I took out some characters that are still not as fleshed out. That includes Nathan, Ria, Nina, Ashley, Zoe, Ray, Maggie, and the hater and Metropolis characters, but they’re all filler characters rn)

A Wild Battinson Character Lore Continuity

- Felicity

- Oldest of the bunch, right between Millennial and Gen Z

- Works at an office, besties with everyone there. Corporate girlie (does use the term girlboss)

- Like if a Gothamite/Bruce Wayne fan was swiftie-coded?

- She has a pet pitbull, you know that kind of white girl

- Tatum

- Goth U, Comp Sci major

- Keeps everyone he knows online at arms length so we don’t know much, has a small close knit friend group irl but he’s also mutuals with everybody on twitter because he’s that kinda guy yk?

- But they’re slowly convincing him. He’s getting there

- Marzia

- Oh god poor Marzia

- Italian, born in Northern Italy, English is her second language but you wouldn’t be able to tell if it weren’t for her slight accent

- Biggest Bruce Wayne stan, will go feral, but only gets replies from him at the worst moments possible

- *snorts like cocaine* “Please don’t do cocaine” is my personal favorite

- Goth U, she gives art major vibes but tacked on a double major in psychology last minute so now she’s staying a fifth year

- Reads smut, writes smut, part of the poetry club, def on booktok, you know the type

- Alejandro

- Runs an ice cream stand in the park on the weekends when it’s warm enough

- Bi, Dating Leo (pfp is them holding hands because he’s a whipped son of a bitch)

- He’s like if that normal-looking kind of athletic guy who always wore sweatshirts and basketball shorts to class just suddenly mentioned he had a boyfriend one day.

- He’s straight-coded but more specifically “the straight guy that gay guys have crushes on against their better judgement”-coded

- Knew the whole time he was bi but never REALLY liked a guy until Leo 🥺. whenever he looks at Leo, he’s got those madly in love eyes

- Thinks Batman is hot and suffers constant torment from Leo (who has a crush on Bruce) because of it

- Ale just wants to be bench pressed is that too much to ask? But It’s his fault he’s a twunk dating a twink so—

- Goth U, Really interested in tech stuff but he’s actually a sports medicine major. He wants to be a physical therapist for athletes

- Cannot hold his liquor

- Smile Watch

- Who knows

- It’s a mystery

- Lela

- Goth Girl

- BFF’s with Nico (goth girl, e-boy solidarity)

- Also good friends with Natalie, they lined up all their gen Ed’s together

- Chill in a Morticia Addams kinda way. She is Morticia Addams actually

- Mom owns a convenience store, she helps out after classes a lot

- Studied for the MCAT, did pretty well, she wants to be a doctor (probably neurosurgeon but it depends on what internship she gets)

- Currently completing the undergrad to grad program at Goth University with a masters in public health

- Natalie

- Former intern, now ASSISTANT at Wayne Press

- Got the job because she impressed Bruce with her good reporting skills, now works mostly on organizing press releases and maintaining Bruce’s public image

- Great at her job because she knows social media and Bruce Wayne Stans the best (she is one obv)

- (Babysits Bruce when Alfred is busy, how did this happen, why is this her job now? She’s tired of his shit lol)

- Still technically working part-time because she hasn’t gotten her degree yet, but she’s set to work full time after she graduates Goth U in May

- Sometimes while sitting at her desk she just gets that perspective shift where she’s like “how did I get here” Bruce Wayne Stans’ dreams do come true

- Caleb 🤡

- Literally 18/19 but aging faster than humanly possible with the stress he’s under

- Used to work at Bat Burger, left because the babysitting gig required more time

- Lives with his aunt who’s already retired (used to live alone, she never had kids or a husband so she’s loaded) He’s staying cuz his parents are super busy and travel for work :) and guess what crime-filled alley their window overlooks? I’ll give you one guess

- Babysits Tim, used to be a less serious gig but his parents have been out of town a lot lately (just vacationing without their child 🙄) and thankfully Caleb lives right across from their swanky apartment so he’s practically a nanny now (read: older sibling/third parent)

- Took a ton of childcare courses for this job and now he’s kind of interested in working at a daycare maybe? If Tim doesn’t kill him in his sleep first

- Recently graduated Goth High, now takes online classes at Goth Community College while deciding what to do with his life

- Jarod

- Recently graduated Goth High, now taking a gap year before starting GothU in the fall. Him and Caleb were always in the same classes so they’re super close (they’re the youngest)

- Future Comp Sci/English major (he wants to be a video game writer)

- Has a younger sister, and technically the oldest child but spiritually he’s the middle child.

- His parents and Priyanka’s parents are close friends so he kind of grew up seeing Priyanka as an older sister. That’s why they’re Like That.

- Literally so fed up with Priyanka, it’s not even funny (yes it is) but the second you’re rude to Priyanka, he will deck you, watch yourself

- Katie (Sweater Thief)

- ER Nurse at Gotham General Hospital, mostly does night shifts

- Gives chronically online energy when she’s online, but everyone in real life wouldn’t suspect a thing because she’s so good at having her life together (the code switch will give you whiplash)

- Surprisingly older than most of the others despite being Like That.

- Literally graduated with a 4.2 GPA how tf?

- BFF’s with Leo then became BFF’s with Ale too after they started dating (she is slowly corrupting Ale and I think that’s beautiful)

- Creator of the Babygirl Bruce Wayne Agenda and PROUD

- Priyanka

- Works at coffee shop owned by her mom called Caffe Mood. She plans to run it one day. Currently a barista

- Goth U, business major (accounting)

- Bilingual, knows Hindi

- LESBIAN QUEEN

- Despite being gay, She is allowed to think Bruce Wayne is hot, that is her Right

- Mad fucking crush on Georgia, calls her Georgie. Intends to never tell a soul. Will fail miserably

- Dead fucking set on the idea that Batman’s a vampire

- But she thinks everyone’s a vampire so—

- Her parents and Jarod’s parents are close friends so she kind of grew up seeing Jarod as a younger brother. That’s why they’re Like That

- Jarod is constantly on her nerves, wtf Jarod (but be mean to him and she’ll kill you)

- Leo

- Works at bookstore called Gotham City Bookstore

- Gay, Dating Alejandro

- Twink (derogatory)

- Swears his gaydar is the most accurate there is (always wrong)

- Made being gay his entire personality because he had an identity crisis in middle school and proceeded to have a massive crush on some straight guy all of high school (that guy was Ale, Leo’s gaydar is so off)

- BFF’s with Katie despite being a few years younger. They were in a high school production of Sweeney Todd together and the rest was history

- Calls every single celebrity gay as a joke, Ale reigns him in if he’s getting too out of hand

- Used to have a mad celebrity crush on Bruce, still kinda (definitely) does

- Attends GothU, undecided for a while but ultimately settled on mathematics because it’s ironically his best subject

- One of those mf’s that needs to be held back at all costs, god help Ale

- Rose 🌹

- Works a tailoring job full time

- Good friends with Felicity, she’s like the black cat to Felicity’s golden retriever

- 70% super nice and chill, 30% wild card party girl

- Gets drinks with friends a lot, tweets when drunk but no one can tell the difference. It’s amazing

- Does not seem horny, is horny. But like normal about it? If that’s a thing

- Nico

- Kinda plays the straight man of the group if the straight man was emo

- BFF’s with Lela (e-boy, goth girl solidarity)

- KING of twitter roasts. He makes memes to end lives.

- Pansexual, single, and probably writing bad poetry in his diary about it but don’t tell anyone

- Goth U, actually dunno the major. Probs public health with Lela but doesn’t want to be a doctor. More like research parallel to social sciences

- Has a 8/9yo sister named Madelaine whom he would die for despite not expecting to be an older brother so late in the game (what were his parents thinking)

- Has tea parties with her and all that jazz. She steals his eyeliner and chain accessories all the time, also she’s friends with Dick and Barbie (yes, Barbara Gordon) so sometimes he watches over their play dates

- He’s a “tough emo boy” so he totally doesn’t laugh at Madelaine’s puns. He’s a bitch ass liar

- Kellyanne

- GothU, marine biology. Transferred from GCCC with an associates degree to save money but now she’s got a full ride cuz of the WE higher education fund

- More recent Bruce Stan

- Pretty poor upbringing, that’s how she met Bruce Wayne. He bought her whole family groceries one night after her card declined at the convenience store trying to buy dinner

- Now she’s in it for the long haul :)

- Lia

- GothU, fashion merchandising

- A GIRL’S GIRL

- Older sister also attends Goth U, but she’s in med school

- More recent Bruce Wayne stan, still not particularly in with the culture and jokes but getting there

- Friends with Georgia and Elizabeth irl. Elizabeth was in the same sorority before graduating first. Got to know Georgia after Lia found her dog with Bruce at the park outside GothU. They party together now

- Elizabeth

- Graduated GothU last May and worked an internship at LexCorp, immediately regretted it but snagged a job at WE (thank god)

- Now works as a research assistant at Wayne Tech in the R&D department for commercial products

- Didn’t really get the whole Bruce Wayne Stan thing until Bruce Wayne personally wished her a happy birthday?? The man is so sweet?

- Absolutely loves her job but still screams at rubber ducks over faulty code in her little cubicle, but that’s the industry she chose so it’s a give and take

- Met Natalie through Stan twitter and now they DM each other about working at Wayne Enterprises

- Doesn’t post much on twitter but follows the main Bruce Stan accounts, irl friends with Lia and Georgia

- Georgia

- Has a dog named Bean

- GothU, majoring in like three languages, polyglot (including Hindi 😏)

- Works at a retail home decor kinda store (home goods?)

- So lesbian-coded, but does not know it yet. Priyanka is her gay awakening. She is now a regular at Caffe Mood (She thinks she just likes the coffee (yeah right))

- Works at Goth U’s admissions department over the summer too

- Once got drunk and locked herself onto a roof by accident, ended up hanging out with Batman (he offered to break into her apartment for her but she said “nah”)

- Jane

- Works at Wayne Enterprises

- Runs bring your kid to work day (idk what her actual job is but she’s an Essential Worker, okay?)

- Very sweet, 10/10, looks on the bright side but never in a toxic positivity way

- Super social too, became work friends with Bruce because she’s nice but not draining to his social battery? They have lunch on occasion

- Watched the Graysons die with Bruce, call that trauma bonding

- Watched her toxic ex’s car burn to a crisp after a joker spree and took a selfie with it (she can have a little revenge, as a treat)

[idyllcy]

and baby, if you knew

word count: 2.1k || pt2 of saying we're just friends

warnings: mentions of the night before (?), morning after, hickies (?)

summary: oh the horrors of getting caught the morning after

You stare at yourself in the mirror, blinking incredulously. (Partially out of pure shock, partially because sleeping with your contacts on was NOT a smart decision on your end)

Holy fuck, Tim got mouthy with you.

You tilt your neck to brush your fingers over the hickeys, gawking at the way it trails down your neck and collar to your chest, the purple popping on your skin. Sure, you weren't half as pale as Tim was, but hello? You didn't even bring concealer. You weren't expecting him to take you to the Wayne Manor. 

"Tim." You swallow, grimacing.

Tim raises a brow, shirt pulled halfway over his head.

"How many hickeys did you give me? Do you have a whisk? Do you have ice? Are you secretly a vampire???"

"One question at a time, lovely." he mumbles. "Seven. There's a whisk and ice downstairs. I am not secretly a vampire, although I can see why you'd guess that."

You blink at him. "Do you have a collared shirt?"

"Just settle for one of my shirts for now." He pulls the shirt over his head, tossing you the other one in the bed. 

"Please tell me it's not sheer."

"It's not."

"Thank GOD you're rich." You mumble. "It's a blessing to have non-sheer white shirts."

"Yeah, I get that." He mumbles. "Come on. Alfred called us for breakfast a little ago."

"Which one of your siblings are here?"

"We'll see." Tim hums, shutting the door to his room. (All of them are downstairs, likely. They were probably having a post-valentine debriefing like they usually do. Bruce was not spared from it.)

You duck behind Tim when you notice everyone having breakfast.

"You said we'll see! Are none of them staying with the people they were out with last night?!"

"It happens every year." Tim hums, holding his hand out for you. "Come on. Don't do the walk of shame."

"Seriously. I run a stan account for you and live in my dorm. I'm practically a hermit." You deadpan. "I am NOT cut out to be meeting your family this early in the morning."

"Master Tim, young miss. Are you ready for breakfast? We are having pancakes."

"Just kidding I would kill for pancakes right now." You mumble, following behind Tim as he sits you next to him.

All eyes are on you as you adjust the collar of your shirt, the tag scratching against your skin, the hickeys on your neck visible. You thank Alfred as he places a plate before you, and you start at the chocolate chip pancakes. Holy shit, fuck the eyes on you, this was heaven.

"Alfred, do you have a recipe book?" You blink at him, eyes wide in admiration. 

"Which recipe would you like, young miss?"

"Oh, all of them if possible. I'd love to be able to cook half as well as you can." You hum, taking another bite of your food. "Do you have a digital copy?"

"Unfortunately, all of it is on paper or in here." He smiles, tapping his brain. "But I am more than willing to provide you with any recipes you may like."

"Mm!" You shove the last piece of the pancake into your mouth, swallowing as you get up. "Tim, do you have a laptop? I want to type a couple recipes down and transcribe what's on paper—"

"Pull open the drawer to your left." He hums.

You pull it open, blinking at him.

"There's a false bottom in it. One of my spare laptops is in it. The password is a combination of letters." He hums.

"With significance?"

"Yes."

"Oh, then I know an approximation, then." You hum, working your finger into the side as you prop it open, pulling his laptop out. "Is it our birthdays?"

"Wait, how did she–" Dick's cut off when you manage to open it on your first try.

"Alright. I'm gonna go! I'll be with Alfred if you need anything." You smile.

"She just?" Duke blinks incredulously. "Did she just hack open your laptop on her first try? Is she in compsci like you?"

"English." Tim grabs a couple pancakes, cutting off a piece of butter. "Creative writing, technically."

"Oh, is she making her own major?"

"Yes." Tim hums. "I don't actually know how she guessed that it would be our birthdays since I only changed it a little while ago. It'd be easier to open if it was just our birthdays combined. Maybe she was stalking me."

"Or, maybe all the years of running a Robin Twitter account finally paid off." Jason shrugs. "She's quite a big writer on the internet too, you know?"

"Yeah." Tim hums. "She's quite the character. Have you read her works?"

"I have." Damian speaks up. "Her writing resembles poetry, pulling on the strings of your heart and snapping them at moments you least expect."

"You've read her works?!" Tim raises a brow at Damian. "That's surprising."

"She resembles the poets."

"She'd love to hear that come out of your mouth for sure." Tim mumbles. "Anything else I should know?"

"She covered me for change once while I went to buy cup noodles." Cass mumbles.

"I'm mutuals with her on Twitter?" Steph points.

"Okay, that's not the point. Timmy." Dick deadpans. "Did you sleep with her last night?"

"Sex or just plain sleeping? Because we did both—"

"I DIDN'T GET TO GIVE YOU THE SHOVEL TALK!" Dick cries. "Okay, when a man and a—"

"Dick, I'm well over into the ages of a legal adult." Tim sighs. "Besides, I'm like seventy percent sure that you gave me the shovel talk when you first found out I was dating Ari in high school. Also, I got one from my dad and Bruce, so I think I'm good."

"Oh, right." Dick mumbles. "But still."

Steph pauses. "Does she want a whisk?"

"She was asking for one earlier." Tim hums.

"We'll go help." Cass mumbles, getting out of the seat, dragging Steph.

"Okay, Tim. Is she the one who was making you all red and blushy during Christmas?" Dick slides closer to him, throwing an arm around his shoulder.

"Yes." Tim sighs, batting Dick's hand away. "She was."

"How'd you ask her out?"

"Told her if she had nothing to do on Valentine's, then she could stick with me and I could plan a date." Tim reaches for another pancake.

"And she agreed?" Jason snorts. "Wow. She's way out of your league."

"Yeah, but at least I got B's absolutely insane ability to pull." He mumbles. "Pulled way out of my league, for sure."

"If you fumble her I fear the things that will happen to you, Drake." Damian clicks his tongue.

"Do I... know her?"

"Duke," Damian sighs. "You're smarter than this."

"He's messing with you right now." Jason pours himself another cup of coffee. 

"What's your relationship with her." Tim deadpans.

"She used to peer review my poems." He hums. "It didn't click until Damian showed me her information this morning, though."

"You just let them go through my girlfriend's personal information?!" Tim finally looks at Bruce, who only gives him a shrug.

"No harm in knowing a little more about your girlfriend."

"I swear, if you bring her in on the vigilantism—"

"That's not happening. I can promise that." Bruce glances at his almost empty mug. "Does she know?"

"She called me out for being Red Robin last night in the car." Tim sighs. "Besides, it'd be strange if she didn't notice immediately how similar Red Robin and I's voices are."

"She's been running your account for how long... now?" Bruce motions for Jason to pass him the coffee.

"Since middle school, so like..." Tim pauses. "Give or take seven years."

"That's a long time." Dick mumbles. "My longest-running fanpage is only six-ish years." 

"If you count the Gotham Gazette, then I've been running for the longest." Bruce snorts. "Is she the one?"

"I think she is." Tim smiles. "And if she's not..."

"Then I will personally see the end of your life, Drake." Damian grumbles. "I shall have mother adopt her and have her write poetry for me in exchange for a living space and food. She shall be the equivalent of a court poet except to mother and I."

"I honestly think she wouldn't turn that down." Tim grimaces. 

"Is she that desperate?"

"She's joked about sleeping with a millionaire to make some money." Tim grimaces. "Something something desperate situations call for desperate measures."

"She would love it in mother's mansion, then." Damian hums, sipping on his tea. "I shall have her write a poem for your death. It shall be my last mercy."

Tim grimaces. "What if she breaks up with me?"

"Then you're in the fault, obviously." Jason mumbles, looking at his phone. 

"So it's my fault regardless of what happens?"

"Listen, her tweets are unhinged. You can't say you like crazy girls and then get annoyed when you date one and she acts insane." Jason grumbles.

"He's got a point, Timmers." Dick hums. "I hope it works out for the best, regardless of the ending."

"Twenty bucks they are endgame." Damian mumbles.

"Alfred bet ten that Tim would pop the ring."

"Ugh, come on. You know no one out-bets Alfred." Dick groans. "Did he set up the jar?"

"He did. This morning." Duke hums. "I put my bet in too."

"Come on–"

"You can't say shit when you bet on all of our relationships and pretty much came out unscathed in all of them." Jason glares. "Shut it."

Tim rolls his eyes, surrendering himself to the idea that his relationship would get bet on. 

"Tim, can I marry your sisters?" You come out of the kitchen, eyes sparkling.

"We're dating." He sighs. "Pretty bird—"

"EWWWWWWW" A mixture of faked hurls and gags are heard in unison as Tim rolls his eyes. 

"Ignore them. Why do you want my sisters?"

"The hickeys are all," You pull your shirt down too to show your cleavage, the hickeys no longer visible, "gone! Your sisters are really good at this."

"Yeah..." Tim sighs, reaching to pull your shirt back up. "Steph isn't my sister, by the way."

"Oh, yes, I know." You smile. "After all, if she was, it'd be strange that you've dated her before." 

Tim chokes on the air at your statement.

"Besides, she's my mutual." You hum. "I also got Alfred's recipes, by the way." You hum, smile on your face. "I also got his chocolate chip cookie recipe, though I need to figure out what the secret ingredient is."

"A dash of vanilla extract." Tim lowers his voice. "Don't tell the rest of the family."

"Got it." You give him a thumbs up. 

"Do you cook?" Damian speaks up.

"I do! Mainly ethnic foods, since there isn't much of that here in Gotham." You mumble. "Got any good Chinese places?"

"Oh, there's this place on Seventh Ave and Jester." Bruce speaks up. "I used to get dim sum there. It's only open from eight to twelve, and you need to get in via reservation. Feel free to borrow my name whenever. Just make sure to invite me."

"Uncle Dan's, right?" You beam. "I went there a while back with another friend, but I miss like... the dim sum that's messy and chaotic in the morning."

"Oh, then try the one on Lightbeam." Dick pauses. "Ah, what was the other street?"

"Oh, that one's good." Duke agrees. "Sam Woo's Dim Sum and BBQ."

"I've had that too!" You smile. "They're good, just quite a while from the university."

"If you really want something good," Cass speaks up from behind you, "try Jin."

"Jin?"

"It's smaller, but it's family-run, and it's been doing business in Gotham for three generations already." Cass hums. "They're called Jin, but the Chinese character for gold. They're right by Gotham U too. On the corner by Circle K."

"The sketchy looking alley??" You blink.

"Yes, but their dumplings are to die for." She pauses. "And they sell in bulk if you want to boil any in your dorm."

"Tim, I want your sister."

"Pretty bird, we just started going out." He clicks his tongue. 

"Tim, if you break her heart, I will date her." Cass blinks.

"You can visit her when she stays in mother's mansion."

"Hm?" You turn to blink at Damian.

"Ignore him—"

"Should you and Drake break up, I have already arranged your living arrangements, should you agree to it."

"And what might they be?" You hand the laptop to Tim, pointing at the document you shared with yourself.

"With my mother. Your only job shall be to write poems and short stories to entertain her."

"Living and writing for the Talia Al Ghul? Count me in." You sigh dreamily. 

"Alright." Tim shuts the laptop after changing the password. "We're going to get going before her roommate calls the cops on her."

"Oh, right!" You mumble. "It was a pleasure meeting you all! I hope to see you again sometime?"

"Tim, send her number in the chat later!" Dick calls as Tim pulls you out.

"Sorry, they're quite embarrassing." Tim mumbles.

"They're warm." You smile. "I like it."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." 

Tim sighs in relief at the look of fondness on your face. Right.

You'll be fine.

[zeynyukine3011]

Some Tim stans are acting like Damian fans are just mad Damian messed up and are insisting it is fine for a character to mess up. But Damian isn't messing up for his own character. This isn't for Damian to learn or grow. It doesn't even align with how Damian would reasonably mess up. This 'mess up' is most likely to sideline Damian for Tim. This is really obvious. Damian shouldn't have in character trusted Zur but he did so Tim can be the good Robin.

EXACTLY!!!!! I've seen several posts about how Damian wasn't OOC and he was "just a child who wanted his father's approval"

People who say this apparently didn't understand Damian's character.

Damian is the child who found his father's identity from a crowd without knowing anything about him. He understood that imposter Insomnia wasn't his father and immediately stabbed him with a sword.

Damian is clever, smart and cunning. In Batman and Robin (2011) he tricked both Batman and Nobody. And neither of them suspected anything until Damian revealed it himself.

But in Zur arc, Damian is just there to look dumb so he can show how "smart" and "perfect" Tim is. Beacuse Chip Zdarsky is basically screaming about his fanboying Tim.

As you just said, this is not something Damian would do. This is not a "mistake" that Damian can have. This incident does not, under any circumstance, add anything to Damian's character development. We have seen, since 2016, that Damian's development he had over the years were thrown to trash. All DC wants to do with him is to be villain.

I was actually starting to gain hope with Batman and Robin (2023) since Damian is not a villainized there (But I don't like how Williamson writes Damian either but at least he is better than Zdarsky. But that's another story.). Unfortunately, however, Damian is still contiuned to be used as a villain, a demon child who always makes stupid mistakes and causes disasters in return.

Like I said in my previous post, Damian will have to apologise for "the things he have done". And, once again, he will be shown as a dumbass who doesn't understand obvious things, and doesn't think the consequences of his actions.

If Damian was written in character, Damian would've notice the moment he laid his eyes on Failsafe, that it wasn't his father. Damian would've become a double agent. He would've secretly make plans to defeat Zur from inside.

Yet, with this writer, we will have a heroic Tim while down grading Damian.

Damian is only there so that Zur can have an evil sidekick and thus, DC can have their "Good B&R vs Evil B&R" fight.

I used to like Tim, actually. I thought he was cool and had potential and could be good brothers with Damian. But in last years, writers always downgrade and badmouth other Robins (particularly Damian) to shine the spotlights to Tim. And while Tim has awesome moments with Bruce, while he saves him, Damian has a horrible relationship with his father. Bruce tells him that even though he loves him, he doesn't like Damian, or just how brash and cruel Damian is, or blaming Damian for Alfred's death etc.

Tim can be written as a good Robin, and for this, DC doesn't need to sweep the floor with the other Robins.

[ashboy-3]

So just got done reading a Nightwing Annual comic and I think I’m in love! Specifical about the relationship between Jason and Dick but the whole comic was good!

Comic panels below all taken from Nightwing Annual 2021

The pure idea that Jason is being framed and Dick agreed with him straight up was amazing!

I love this flashback so much! Like they bonded and Alfred’s proud smile as he hides behind the penny is just so amazing! Like I love him and them and all of them!

Just Dick making fun of Jason gives me life. I’m going to start quoting this it is amazing!

Look at these two! Jason doesn’t try and take the keys! He’s such a younger brother just “can I drive this time?” And Dick straight up just shoots him down like no I’m the older brother I’ll drive.

I have nothing for this I just love this evasion panel. Like look Dick clearly showed Jason some shot here and he still uses it!!!! I love them!

Bru Jason over here is just amazing! “You have badly misread my unresolved issues” like we stan a man who admits he needs therapy!

Look at how worried my baby boy is in this panel! Like he truly cares for Jason and my heart just!

Jason finally gets to drive and this is what he does to the car! I love him! Baby boy you are never going to be allowed to drive again!

My heart stopped when Dick called him Robin! Like I was not expecting it! Red hood didn’t work so his go to was Robin!

Just the full circle her gets me! I love it when stories come full circle and look at Jason here he’s such a middle child. “Sure we don’t have to own up it” like babygirl is gonna straight gas light his father and I’m all for it!