#we really were just kids growing up trying to convince each other to keep living. i hope we are doing okay now. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

auspicioustidings · 1 year ago

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The Revelation

Summary: You are pretty happy with the cult you have made for yourself, but when two newcomers show up you can't help but think how far you could go with this.

(this is a one-shot, I stg if your only comment on this is to say 'part 2' I will feed you to the tomato plants! If you like it and have brain worms about it by all means send those to me and we can bounce ideas around)

Words: 6.6k

CWs: Cult shit, dubcon (everyone is manipulating each other here), light petplay (hope you're proud of yourself Bo I am incapable of writing Ghoap without Johnny being a puppy now), smut, murder, slight allusion to cannibalism (in a round about way, just putting it here for safety), Catholicism

The Death of God happened on a gloomy Thursday afternoon. One moment he had been mowing the lawn and the next thing he had an epiphany about hating his suburban life, hating his suburban wife, hating the 2 kids and hating the lawnmower he had spent his last bonus on.

The Revelation happened on a sunny Friday morning when you had popped up on his tiktok feed and told him that you understood him, that you were there for him. He had made his way to the commune, telling his wife it was just a visit to find himself. And he did. Which of course meant he never came home.

Truly you would consider yourself some what of a miracle working taking in this portly, charisma void of a businessman and turning him into some semblance of interesting. Well as interesting as anyone in this little slice of heaven. He had a fascination with growing tomatoes now. Good for him.

The hundreds of little deaths of God had been great for business. When someone had a crisis, when someone thought they were broken, when someone just couldn't fucking take it anymore, that's when they were so desperate to believe in something that you could make them happy with a smile and a kind word every so often. You could keep them happy (well, what they believed was happy and wasn't that all that mattered?) by keeping them a little tired, a little hungry and occasionally a little high. Good for the soul really, that's what you always said.

Surely you deserved to live on a steady diet of champagne, strawberries and decadence for all the good work you did. They all understood how difficult it was to be you. And despite your trials weren't you still so lovely to them? Even when they acted out you were gentle in your reminders that they needed fixing, that you were only ever there to help, that their friends and families would try and convince them otherwise because they didn't understand what it was to be broken. You opened your arms to them always, it was in their nature to err and in yours to forgive.

Honestly you could keep this up for the rest of your life. A small group of people devoted to you, happy in their worship and happy in their toil. No violence needed to keep them compliant, just a soft touch and the occasional psychological torture as necessary. You had no aspirations to go beyond this, you had it good. No need for a death cult or to make yourself an actual God to them. You already had your champagne and strawberries after all, life was good.

–

They were big, these two new men to your little oasis. It would be a tricky thing to half starve them you thought, but then it would also be a shame to have them lose all that bulk that you found you quite enjoyed looking at. Still, it was important for enlightenment and all that.

So you gave them a steady supply of soft smiles and reassuring touches, a diet of “yes this is an eco-living commune!” and “oh I never thought anyone would want to join me out here, I just got very lucky that so many wonderful people share the same morals.” They went easy of course, ex-military, used to structure and relying on someone above them to do the thinking. Perfect for you really, just two attack dogs that were impeccably trained.

They neglected to tell you that they hadn't been regular military, that they had been high ranked special operators in an elite task force. That would have made you suspicious after all and it was better you thought them stupid. Johnny had seen you on tiktok and wanted you and Simon never denied his boy anything, so here they were, playing you completely into their hands.

First it was getting themselves special privileges, unlimited access to food, a home right next to yours, full evenings of rest. Hadn't been hard to make you think it was your idea.

“Och it's alright lass, I ken we're naw military anymore. Dinnae need tae be a lean, mean, killing machine oot here.”

“Of course not Johnny, I'd hope you think you're very safe here.”

“Aye, feel safe with you. Ye look after us. Wish ye would let us look after you more!”

“I don't need anymore than I already have, but it's so wonderful of you to say, truly.”

Then a few days later when there had been time for that little declaration to settle in.

“Simon! How are you, I didn't see you yesterday.”

“Sorry, pulled my shoulder something awful. Felt like a right git not being able to do work properly.”

“Oh that's terrible, how did you pull it?”

“Ah just lack of training is all. Too used to being strong, retirement doesn't really lend itself to that.”

“You're still plenty strong!”

“I hope so. Some of the things I hear about what people's families think of you… if it ever came down to it, I want you to know I'd protect you with my life. Both me and Johnny would, strong or not.”

You had really been given an absolute gift here. That was something that had been making you a little paranoid. If family members escalated to violence there was really nothing you could do. You were a lover (here meaning awful con artist but that was just semantics) not a fighter. And now there was a solution right in your lap.

“How would you and Johnny feel about being security then? I'd hate to think we'd ever need it of course, but it would make people feel safer. Some of their families are terrible people I'm afraid, I don't want anyone to get hurt because someone tries something violent” you said gently, of course concerned for these innocent people being viciously abused by their awful families (these brainwashed people being taken by their loved ones to recover and live meaningful lives again, lives which did not involved maintaining your champagne and strawberry habit).

“If you ask us of course we'd never say no, it's just… would it be ok to have an hour a day to train? It's such an honour to protect this place, not looking to half arse it.”

“Of course! Come to my house with Johnny after supper and we can discuss some accommodations for your new roles.”

–

“How does that sound?” you asked, soft as silk.

You knew how it sounded, it sounded like you were the damn second coming. Giving them unrestricted food and sleep, telling them you'd have a house for them built right by your side? You knew it was working by how Johnny's eyes had went big and wet, projecting puppy-like adoration. And Simon? Oh that big, delicious man stood and walked over to you so he could kneel at your feet. Fuck you had never felt better about yourself.

“We don't deserve so much of your consideration. I-” he said, the first time you had heard him struggle to get words out through his emotion. “I want to thank you properly.”

He said it like it was a revelation and it peaked your interest. You could have squealed with delight when his cheek leant against your knee, your dress pushed by his face to let skin meet skin, eyes locked with yours as he turned to kiss your flesh. You hadn't fucked any of your followers, too messy. But these weren't regular followers anymore right? No, these were special followers. And it had been so long and he was looking at you like he was desperate to give you any pleasure he could.

Oh Simon was desperate all right, had been thinking about getting you sloppy and pathetic for him since Johnny had excitedly shown him that bloody video of you acting like an innocent little lamb. He wanted to just barrel in, bend you over and claim you right away. It was Johnny who insisted it would be more fun to trick you, who had whined like a bitch about it until he got his way. Bloody MacTavish. He really needed to train those puppy dog eyes right out of the boy. Those had got him to indulge in all sort of risks already. Nearly fucked the whole plan right up when you had come dangerously close to catching him balls deep in Johnny in your bed, absolutely ruining him as per his own puppy dog eyed request.

For his part Johnny was positively giddy. He might give away the game if he really got to watch Simon taste you. Would he play gently with you? Oh my God would he pretend he was inexperienced to make you feel superior? Let you think you were guiding him? That might kill him dead. He tried to not fucking salivate and start panting at the thought of it.

“Then thank me properly.”

Fuck the way his eyes lit up at that. This gorgeous man wanted you, he wanted to please you. As a hand squeezed your calf and he started to drag his mouth up your bare leg you felt the sick thrill of wondering how far they would go for you. Already people had given up families, friends, wealth. You had never pushed it beyond, horrified whenever you thought about how delicious it would be if they would die for you, kill for you and so shoving those dark thoughts to the back of your mind.

But you didn't want Simon to die for you. You did want to see how far you could push, how deep his devotion ran. To that end you wove fingers through his hair and pulled him off of your thigh, his eyes flickering from your wet panties sticking to your cunt up to your own eyes in question.

“I want you to kiss Johnny.”

You said it like a woman possessed. Fuck. That's exactly what you wanted. You wanted these big masculine men to fuck against their own desires but do it for you. They were dumb jocks really, probably had never fumbled around with another man before. They'd find it hard, find it wrong. You didn't really consider yourself a bad person before this moment, just a clever one. This was straying into something else, some monstrous part of you that was salivating with the thought of finally being released.

“Will you do that for me?”

You heard a choked sort of noise and looked over to see Johnny hiding his face in his hands. Of course, big Scottish man must be scared of doing such a thing. Or rather having such a thing done to him. You imagined it would be some attack to his sense of self to have a bigger man press a kiss onto him. Fuck maybe he would tear up. Maybe he would fully cry if Simon pushed inside of him. You hoped that God really was dead because if not you were sure They'd have some stern words for you after this.

“Oh I've never…”

Fuuuuuck. Simon's vulnerable eyes darting from Johnny to you were liable to make you cum on the fucking spot. You smiled indulgently down on him, running a hand over his face is a caress.

“You know I only ever do what's best for you don't you? I wouldn't ever ask you to do anything that isn't for the greater good. Do you believe in me Simon?” you said, the years of practice infusing your tone with a cloying sweetness.

“Yes” he replied, barely a breathy whisper of affirmation.

His glazed eyes looked at you with such adoration before he nuzzled his face into your hand and left a kiss there before making his way across to where Johnny was sitting on the sofa, face still hidden in his hands. He went over on his knees, crawled. You pressed your fingers against your throbbing clit, cupping yourself to try and tell your body to calm down because there was so much more to come.

Simon crawled between Johnny’s legs, going up on his knees and grabbing Johnny’s nape to drag his face down. He was whispering something in his ear, maybe trying to settle him, trying to assure him this was what they needed to do for you. Of course had you been aware Simon was hissing at Johnny to keep it together, to stop laughing about how easily you were falling for this, then the whole thing would really have been ruined. Luckily Johnny was still a soldier, Simon still his LT, so when he was ordered to put his game face on he did it. And luckily Johnny was still a good boy, Simon was still his master, so he knew that squeezing at his pup's nape always got that furrow in his brow to relax, got him eager to please and ready to tear up at the first little tease or overstimulation.

It was really destiny that you would be this level of power hungry, this eager to push and see what you could make people do. He had been training Johnny to put all his eager to please energy to good use for years, had turned a feral mutt into a feral mutt with impeccable training. The chance to turn a corrupt fox into a corrupt fox whose only desire was to be stroked and pampered was making him painfully hard. Johnny had been right, tricking you was far more delicious than just forcing you into it.

When he moved Johnny’s hands from his face it was to reveal a man looking ruined, looking liquid eyed and flushed. Simon mouthed a good boy to him before pressing a kiss to his lips. It was calculatedly shy and tentative and he kept a steadying hand on Johnny’s knee, squeezing when he felt he might lose control and start panting and licking his way into his mouth as he usually tried to do. Simon couldn’t very well punish him right now without giving the game away, so he just had to use the suggestion of a future punishment.

After the first peck you watched a slow and decadent slide into forbidden desire. They got a little bolder with each press of lips, seemed to squirm a bit more with the struggle of it feeling good but wrong. When Simon pulled away and Johnny whined despite himself you slid your hand past your waistband, needing to touch yourself or you’d die.

“You’d like it if Simon used his tongue wouldn’t you Johnny? Would be nice to feel it against yours. It’s important that you two are close isn’t it? To do your jobs well that is.”

Johnny would have agreed with full enthusiasm and pounced Simon to get them both on the floor so he could rut his hips down into the cock he was desperate for, but the hand at his bad knee squeezed again and the spark of pain reminded him of the mission. So instead he looked at you, teary and unsure.

“H-his tongue? I… I’m naw…”

“You’re not what Johnny?”

“It’s wrong.”

“Who told you that?”

You watched him play with the thin chain around his neck, the crucifix falling out of his shirt. Catholic. Oh this must be even more torturous for him. No matter, you had killed plenty of Gods already, you could kill his. Watch guilt eat and eat and eat at him until finally he gave in to the desire. Gave in to you. Let any other divine figure die in favour of a new God.

“Oh Johnny, do you think I would lead you into temptation? It’s ok, I would never make you. If you don’t like it that’s fine, you can both call it a night hm? Security is a tough job, I would never think less of you for not being up to the task. My fault really, I must have mistaken the potential I saw in you.”

He surged forward and shoved his tongue past Simon’s teeth and you moaned deeply, fingers so slippery that getting proper friction on your clit was a challenge now. You did not think you had ever been so wet in your life, feeling slick trickle out of you as they clumsily seemed to fight for dominance, saliva dripping down Johnny’s chin from how much he was trying to follow your instructions, how deep he was trying to pull Simon’s tongue with his into his mouth.

When they next pulled away they both seemed dazed, like they couldn't believe they had just done that. Poor Simon turned to look at your pleadingly, legs widening so you could see he was straining against his pants. He was rock solid from making out with Johnny and you were cumming all at once, hips rolling in time with your fingers as you breathed out instructions with your cunt still clenching in waves.

“Good, so good for me. Want you both to cum, get all of that tension out. Wouldn't ever leave you wanting would I?”

They both looked needy, but the fact that they quietly waited for instructions on how to cum was possibly the most erotic thing you had ever seen.

“It's OK, you can help each other. That's what it's all about here isn't it? Helping those in need in the community, and you're both in need. Jerk your cocks together, it'll be bonding for you to cum together like that.”

They fucking did it. Simon shoved his pants down enough to free the absolute monster of a cock he had and dragged Johnny only his lap on the floor. Johnny's cock was thick as anything and just as hard. Fuck the image of Johnny taking Simon’s cock, taking every hard inch of him in his ass. Crying about how it wouldn't fit, how it was wrong. Clutching his crucifix. You needed to make it happen soon. Maybe you could make Johnny wear a plug, say it was part of training. Get him ready to be fucked by his friend and once superior without him ever realising that's what you were doing.

Their precum was already making the slide of it easier as Simon took the lead, big hand wrapping around both of them and slowly pumping, staring at it in fascination. You were slowly overstimulating your clit, feeling that tension start growing again already.

“Spit on it Johnny.”

He did it without hesitation, his saliva making Simon’s jerking squelch. It didn't take long until Johnny was begging, needing to cum. You didn't even register that it wasn't you he was looking at as he begged, you were too lost in sensation, eyes locked on their cocks rubbing together.

“Go on, cum. Both of you.”

Simon sped his hand and his low grunt (the ‘s’ok pup, cum’ so low you hadn’t heard it over your pleasure) combined with Johnny's drooling and panting sent you spiralling over the edge again as they both shot ropes of sticky cum all over each other.

Fuck. What else could you make people do?

–

Over the next few weeks life got even easier for you. Simon and Johnny were excellent right hands, earning respect from all of your followers and taking on almost all of the tasks you had (which you had made sure were as minimal as possible already, the whole point of this endeavour was to live an easy life).

Simon was careful to make sure to be seen with you, start planting the seeds in people's minds that they were an extension of you. Johnny was rapidly losing patience which made him incredibly satisfying to fuck because he got to beat every single complaint out of him. It was him that wanted to go this route so he was going to finish what he started. It had been a long time since he had seen Johnny get so worked up over anything and he forgot how much he enjoyed him when he was like this, biting at every little bit of bait that Simon left with the express purpose of having an excuse to punish him later for it.

Johnny needed putting down when he got this wound up, at this point Simon had taken him over his knee at least once a day, collared and leashed him most nights, fucked him silly so much that he was constantly aching and plugged to keep ready for a quickie when he needed it. Which right now was inhumanly often and with them still in the bunkhouse they were having to get very creative with the venue. Johnny was going especially feral given that you had only been alone with them once more since you had promoted them and you had acted like last time had never happened. Clever actually, Simon had to hand it to you, you were very good at playing with people. He could see the little glimmer in your eye, the delight at seeing how Johnny seemed to be vibrating with anticipation of something that never came. You were setting him up to beg, making sure that when he gave in and went directly against his God that it would be him pleading for you to let him do so.

It wasn’t like you had ever been close enough to tell, but that little cross around Johnny’s neck had SR carved into the back of it. Simon had corrupted the Roman Catholic out of this pup years ago, the cross only came out on special occasions when Johnny wanted to play coy and innocent or when Simon wanted to remind him who he belonged to (because it certainly wasn’t a God, it was his fucking lieutenant). Well and now, when they both knew the sight of it would give you such a power trip that you’d fall right into their trap.

“I was thinking about your house” you said, the three of you standing where the foundations were already being put down.

“Aye?”

“It just seems such a waste when I have extra bedrooms in my home.”

“It would be such an honour to stay in any of them. Would we not be intruding?”

“Of course not Simon, you are my right hand men now. It makes sense for you to stay close to me. To one another.”

You swore you could see Johnny’s ears perk up, a phantom tail flicking quickly behind him in rapt attention at that. Of course their minds would go there, just like you wanted them to. It hadn’t been too difficult for you to be patient, to play with them so that you didn’t push too far too fast. It was something you were very good at.

“Would you… still let us build something here?”

“Oh?”

“I think a temple of sorts would be nice. Somewhere for you to relax. You work so hard for all of us and if you are taking us into your space I’d hate for you to have nowhere to go to meditate alone.”

It only took a few days to wear you down. You had no idea how much influence they already had with your followers, how easy it was for them to plant that idea there and have them be the ones appealing to you to please allow them to do this for you. And while that shred of morality you had left was screaming at you not to do this, not to actually Deify yourself lest it go too far, the adoration inflated your ego and drowned your conscience out.

So they started to build your temple.

–

“Ah! Like that. That’s it, that’s what I need” you moaned out, Simon in between your legs worshipping.

You had moved them into your home, the large house comfortable and spacious in comparison to the bunkhouse the other followers stayed in, and that night Simon had come to your room and gotten on his knees for you. How could you say no to him?

The adoration of your followers was nothing compared to this. They loved you yes, but fuck Simon was reverant, tongue swirling around your cunt so there was more holy water for him to glut himself on. This was decadent, languid on your bed with him focusing entirely on your pleasure, expecting nothing in return. This man who was spending his days by your side, overlooking the building of a temple in your honour. You could not decide in this moment if you wanted him to fuck you on the altar when it was done or if you wanted to fuck him.

It was a good conundrum to have because you felt that you could simply have both. You could have whatever the fuck you wanted with this man by your side. Who could stand against him and Johnny? And who would ever worship you more? You had never actually bought your own bullshit before, but if he kept this up maybe you were some sort of God because how else could you be living this deliciously?

You tugged his hair sharply to get him off of you and pushed at him until he was on his back. You would take what you wanted from him because it was your right to do so. He did not complain as you settled your cunt on his face and rode him, if anything his clever tongue worked harder to please you. You held his head and used him, and he drank you down and thanked you for the privilege after, vanishing out of your room as silently as he had arrived.

–

It only took another few weeks for Johnny to break and oh he broke so perfectly. Simon came to your room every night to pray, and Johnny must know, must have heard how Simon spilled thank yous against your cunt even as you pushed down to deprive him of oxygen, even as you smeared your slick all over his face, moving exactly as you liked with no consideration of him. You never touched him in any way meant for his pleasure, only to use him for yours.

It was not Simon who knocked lightly on the door. Simon didn’t knock at all, he always just let himself in.

“Come in Johnny.”

He was nervous, that much was clear. You did enjoy the sight of him in only his boxers and crucifix, moonlight doing wonders in making him look incredibly edible. You wanted to knead his pecs like they were tits, wanted to sink your teeth into the meat of his neck until you tasted blood and he cried out your name instead of his God’s.

“I want…”

“Hm? You want?”

“Will ye let me please ye? I ken Si… I’m naw good enough for ye, but I want tae be. It’s just, I’ve never uh… I’m a quick study.”

And with perfect timing, in walked Simon. Couldn’t have planned it better yourself (well, actually Johnny had planned it, Simon had laughed and ruffled his hair at how eager he had been to act the part of the blushing virgin before unhooking the leash and getting him out of his collar and into his crucifix).

“Good evening Simon” you purred.

The man didn’t really acknowledge that Johnny was in the room, instead going to his place by the foot of your bed and kneeling. It was always where you started, with him lapping at you until you ordered him onto the bed or the floor so you could take what you needed. Only you pushed him away with your foot when he tried to pull at your shorts, holding him at leg length and looking at Johnny.

“Come sit will you?”

He nervously shuffled over, sitting next to you on the bed with his eyes darting uncomfortably down to Simon kneeling pretty, your foot still holding him away from you. He swallowed and you thought it sweet how he held your gaze to avoid watching as you motioned for Simon to move and he did so without hesitation. Johnny still didn’t look at him even as you put a hand to his knee to make him spread his legs enough for Simon’s broad shoulders to fit between them.

“If you want to learn I’d never stop you Johnny, I want you to be the best at the things you’d like. And I’m sure Simon makes a wonderful teacher.”

Simon didn’t need prompting, obedient and perfect boy that he was. He started licking up Johnny’s thick thigh the same way he would have if you were sitting there. Johnny, bless him, gripped onto your leg like it was a lifeline, fingers digging into the plush flesh hard enough that you imagined it may leave marks. You swallowed his loud whine with your mouth when Simon slipped his boxers down and took his hard cock right to the root. It almost made you laugh, if you tried to take that in your throat you would certainly be gagging and crying.

When you pulled away Johnny was a whining mess, one hand fisted in the sheets and the other still dug into the fat of your thigh. You wondered if he had ever gotten head. Certainly not from another man. Oh wouldn’t his priest be so disappointed in him. You could imagine a severe man in the robes of God, looking with disgust at the whore before him. But you were a kinder creature, letting him indulge in pleasure without telling him he couldn’t.

Well, to a point. You pushed Simon to stop with the frankly immaculate looking blow job when it was clear from Johnny’s hips rutting that he was close. Then you swung your leg around, straddling Johnny and squeezing yourself to him, stopping him from trying to get friction from you.

“Not yet Johnny, you need to be patient hm? Simon, open him up. Tongue first, then fingers.”

Johnny was tearing up, looking at you like he didn’t understand why you were doing this while feeling horribly guilty that he liked it. He howled when Simon’s tongue started playing at his rim, his hands gripping at your hips to try and make you move against him. You put a hand to his throat and squeezed lightly.

“It’s ok, you can take it can’t you?”

“I-I cannae, please bonnie, I’m naw- I dinnae-” he whined before he choked on nothing, eyes blown wide, “h-his tongue is, fuck it’s inside.”

“I know Johnny, I know. Is it too much then? Should I tell him to stop? If you can’t take it, then at least you tried” you said, sweet as anything but putting a tiny edge of disappointment into your tone.

“I can take it! Please, I can! Dinnae make him stop, I can take whatever ye gie me!”

“Good boy.”

Oh, the reaction to those two words was worth exploring. It was like he changed from a man to some pathetic animal, eyes watery and begging, hands pawing at your hips while his own desperately tried to buck up. You felt how he froze, heard how he choked when Simon pressed a finger into him.

“Hmm that’s it, take what you’re given, you’ll be good and hold off for me hm?” you cooed, moving a hand to run fingers under his chain, all the way around until you were behind his neck and could yank, have that crucifix choking him. “Looks better like this Johnny, almost like a pretty collar for you.”

Jackpot. Even with you clamping down to give him as little room for friction as possible you felt the hot gush of his cum, him getting there from being choked, being compared to a dog to be collared. Well if he was going to be a mutt that came without your permission, the permission of his master, then he needed to learn his place no?

“Fuck pet, told you to be patient.”

“Sorry, m’sorry bonnie. Ah! M-make him stop, s’too much!”

“Make him stop? But he’s been good for me, followed everything I’ve asked, You went ahead and finished without permission. Wouldn’t make sense to punish him and reward you, I need to be fair pet.”

He was clearly overstimulated, his hips trying to rut even as he gasped at every bit of friction he got. Oh you wanted to see him fucked out and ruined. You wanted his heart on a fucking platter.

“More Simon. Johnny here is going to let you fuck him tonight, so you need to open him up properly.”

“I-I-” Johnny stuttered, bottom lip quivering and eyes wide and wet. If you weren't so high on the decadence of having these two men at your mercy you’d have questioned just how practised that was.

“Tell me Johnny. Tell me what it is you want.”

Tell me what it is I want to hear that you want. Be a good boy, don’t disappoint me. You’d hate to disappoint me after all I’ve done for you.

“I want Simon tae fuck me tonight.”

“Good boy” you said, hammering that final nail in God’s coffin as you yanked again at the chain so hard it snapped, taking your trophy and tossing it onto your desk without ever having examined it closely.

You watched Simon ruin him at your command. You drank their praise like champagne, bit into their gratitude like strawberries bursting their juice on your chin. You were greedy in how many times you used them for your pleasure, their fingers, their tongues, the sight of them overcome with hedonistic abandon.

You felt like a God.

–

The temple was beautiful, no effort or expense spared. The first floor was a space for everyone, for the brand new community gatherings that you occasionally led but had mostly been letting Simon and Johnny lead. Above that was two glorious floors of space only for you. The only other people permitted to set foot in here were your two right hands. It was something else, being in the luxuriant bed drinking champagne and watching the two of them play with each other for your benefit.

You could not stop thinking about the way Johnny had writhed at the mention of a collar when you had taken his crucifix for yourself (it still sat on the desk right where you had left it). You could not stop imagining how such a thing would look around his thick neck, how your other followers would look at it and be jealous that he got to be so visibly claimed by you.

As always your wish was their command. Simon had presented you with a gorgeous necklace of sorts, almost a choker, the pendant a symbol you didn’t recognise.

“This doesn’t look like a collar for you.”

“It’s for you. The symbol is from the cult of Venus, we thought… well we thought if you could wear it, show people, then when we wore it…”

“You want them to know you are wearing it for me.”

Perfect fucking boys weren’t they. They didn’t just want to show up in a collar, they wanted to show up in a symbol associated with you. It was pretty enough what they had chosen, delicate and clearly made with care and devotion. You turned and lifted your hair so he could put it on you and the very next community gathering was Johnny eagerly explaining the symbol to your followers. It was etched into the temple walls soon after.

–

The realisation happened all at once. You only attended community gatherings for special occasions now and when you did they were all looking at you like you were their God made flesh. Your followers had become something else, something well beyond a little eco-living commune. That had not been your doing.

The door was locked. You could not leave your space in the Temple. Your hand flew to the back of your necklace, realising with a startle that you couldn’t take it off. Simon and Johnny never did have collars made. Why would they? You were rapidly realising they had never intended to. You looked in the mirror, tried to find a clue. The pendant… it was only when you drew it over and over again that you figured it out. This wasn’t some symbol of an old Goddess, it was the letters S R J M twisted around to make a pretty symbol. You sat and stewed, waiting for them to get back. When they did you were sat on the bed, glowering at them.

“Aww ye figure us out bonnie?”

“You played me.”

“Like a fucking violin sweetheart” Simon cooed, walking over to flick the pendant.

You huffed up at him. Everything was completely fucked now. You had all but ordered your followers to treat these two as your spokesmen. You had been slowly vanishing from public life, ingraining in their minds that you were a God who lived in a temple and only graced them with your presence when they had really earned it. All this after years of breaking them down so they thought nothing they ever did was good enough, so of course they would never think they had earned it.

And you had never used violence for anything, you were soft and lived on champagne and strawberries for fuck sake, it wasn’t like you could brute force your way out of this. You were enough of a schemer to know when you had been outplayed.

“So the little shy virginal act?”

Johnny laughed and came over to nuzzle into your hair.

“Ye’d naw believe how many times Si has been in my arse hen, this isnae even the first house of God he’s bent me over in.”

You scowled and pushed his head away, but his eyes only sparkled with excitement as he bullied it right back into nuzzling you like a fucking dog.

“Pup has been so excited about you finally figuring it out. You’ve been teasing him for months now, don’t think it’s time to give him a treat for how well behaved he’s been for you?”

It’s not like you were against the idea, it had been delicious being the dominant one all this time but there was something interesting about the idea of letting Simon take control, letting him get Johnny to fuck you the way you had let him fuck Johnny. Because that would be the case you knew now. It was so obvious knowing what you knew, you really should have figured out way sooner that Simon had always been in control. All the things you had done since he got here that you had thought your ideas weren’t yours at all, he had put them in your head.

“So that’s it then? You keep me here and take over?”

Simon was looking at you with something deranged behind those eyes. It was dreadfully exciting.

“You're coming to tonight's community gathering. You can decide if puppy gets a treat after that.”

–

The Birth of God happened on that brilliant Friday evening. One moment you had been fighting against your conscience, and the next you had let go. You had walked forward, no floated, and pressed a holy kiss to his head. Watching one of your followers plunge a knife into the heart of another on your altar, both with a smile on their faces, was fucking beautiful.

The Revelation happened about the same time. You dipped your fingers in the blood (the same colour as those tomatoes he so loved, the tomatoes that his body would feed and your followers would eat) and marked his murderer with your symbol, the initials of the men that had made you God.

Puppy had more than earned his treat.

#mhairiwrites #cod #fanfic #ghoap x reader #simon riley x reader #john mactavish x reader #simon riley x john mactavish #please read the cws #also please let me exist on champagne and strawberries because I am OVER IT #if I was not a depressed little mess and could actually write smut right now you would have gotten reader getting railed on a bloody altar #would have been great

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wheelsupin-azarathmetrionzinthos · 1 year ago

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Lucy needed a friend in S4

Whenever I think about episode 4x17 and Chris singing Dream A Little Dream of Me in front of Lucy like it was a normal thing to do or a normal mistake to make. I question like the rest of us “why didn’t she break up with him?” We could assume that it was the show itself minimizing her trauma or keeping Chris around for drama reasons. But ignoring that type of meta analysis, in character I think it all comes back to the fact that in season 4, Lucy doesn’t have the friends and support she had before. Yes I know she had Tim but we’ll get to that. Losing Jackson lost Lucy a very important person in her life, because yes they were best friends but they were also peers. They went to each other about everything. Like we saw with Vanessa Chen, Jackson was willing to go scorched earth for Lucy against her own mother, even while Lucy would’ve just suffered in silence about her parents’ disapproval. Unlike her friendships with Nyla, Angela or Tim, Jackson was a peer, they went through the academy together, they were in a very similar stage of life. He was her sounding board in a way Nolan wasn’t or Rachel used to be before she moved. Lucy in season 4 also became Tamara’s primary caretaker, she got a little sister to care about and protect. Lucy absolutely wouldn’t want to burden her with any of the emotional uncertainty or trauma she was working through. As previously demonstrated with Rachel, Lucy works through her issues by talking through them with someone. Her best ability to introspect is talking through her feelings, and having someone point out the lack of logic, or being able to point out her own logic. She can’t do that with Tamara, she’s not burdening this kid. She can’t really do this with Nyla and Angela, because while they are her friends they also outrank her, and are further in their careers and lives. Thorsen is still a rookie and isn’t quite at that level yet. That leaves Tim, but at this point, I think something would prevent Lucy from really discussing her relationship with Tim. They both can’t really admit to each other that there are problems in their relationships because well...that would require them to address their deal. THe only reason Lucy intervened with Ashley is that Ashley called *her* about Kojo So anyway back to 4x17. Chris sings the song, Lucy spirals, and then she decides to watch the video, she decides not to testify, and then she’s fine? She goes to dinner with Chris? But let’s look at that scene. Even on one of her most vulnerable days, Lucy sees that Tamara is interested in lawyer intern Austin. So she makes it easy on Tamara. She knows if she��s not perfectly okay, Tamara will feel bad and it’ll ruin her evening. Lucy cares so much, even at the detriment of her own feelings. Lucy takes care of Tamara by going to dinner with Chris and convincing herself that yeah this is fine and that being with a man who belittles her career, and doesn’t listen to her, and is moving too fast is okay. It’s okay because the two people who could clock that she’s not okay, are Tim (distracted by trying to not have feelings for Lucy, and also Lucy will always want him to be proud of her which means not being vulnerable about things she’s supposed to be “over”) and Jackson (who is dead). If Jackson had been around, Lucy could’ve let herself fall apart over the SUPER TRAUMATIC DAY, and he would’ve called her on her stubbornness in needing to make Chris work. Jackson was her safeplace, in the way that Angela was Tim’s and Nyla had become Nolan’s. S4 left her unmoored which left with the ability to grow in her relationship with Tim, but it also hindered her when things came up that she couldn’t talk to Tim about, like issues with Chris, or kissing Tim in her apartment. S4 Lucy needed her friend Jackson a whole bunch, and nothing shows that more then 4x17, because Jackson would have protected her from herself.

#lucy chen #jackson west #tim bradford #Chenford #Chris Sanford #the rookie #tldr: if jackson was still alive Chris would not have lasted as long as he had #for many reasons #primarily calling lucy on her own bullshit #affectionately but you know

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mostofthingsmostofthetime · 6 months ago

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Omg just watched episode 2 of Distant Lands & I'm screaming.

Now, don't get me wrong, I definitely shipped Bubbleline before, but this episode had me INVESTED!!!!

Ahhr, I don't even know where to start?

The glass kingdom is so beautiful. I don't care how impractical it'd be, I wanna live there.

Marceline's old look was so awesome!!!!!! like, don't get me wrong, she always looks good, but I know WLW were being fed this episode, lol. As for me, I want Bubblegum's wardrobe STAT as not only is it a pastel lover's dream come true, but all the clothes look so soft (which I don't know how they manage to convey in 2D but they did).

Domestic Bubbleline has my entire heart forever, bye!!!!

Am I correct in seeing the friendship between glass boy & See Through princess as a parallel to Finn & Bubblegum's early friendship? Like tall, beautiful royal that's bogged down by her duty vs small, younger(?), disabled (which Finn later ends up becoming), blue boy who starts feeling dismissed/not taken seriously by his older(?) friend & wants to help/be a hero despite not having any powers (ok, so Finn has lightning amuinty, but that didn't come till much later)? Plus, there's the whole fire monster trying to kill him only for it to turn out to not be so bad, like when flame princess was introduced, & turning into (what looks to me like) some kind of a butterfly at the end, which we know was one of the things Finn was reincarnated as in a past life.

Those royal helpers (or whatever they're called) suck ass.

Simon, I love you!!!! Also, Ignore those monsters. Wear that moomoo & crown if it helps you cope.

They bubble wrapped him!!!! I'm crying, that's the sweetest, funniest & most practical way to go about it though like dude, you're litrually made of glass & already have a cracked face. You need to be way more careful about your obvious fragility.

I'm sorry, Bonnie, but the song does slap.

This is the major Bubblegum betrayal that I've been hearing about? Omg you have to be kidding. Like, I'm not saying you HAVE to love her as a character, but you really had me scared she was gonna do something absolutely twisted & it turned out to be.....this? Like, don't get me wrong, her reasoning wasn't the best & it was definitely bad of her to keep it from Marcleline, but do we really want characters without flaws & why are some fans seemingly convinced that Bubblegum is the sole AT character (especially out of her & Marcleline) that has any? Like the episode litrually gives us serval scenes from both of their POV's to show us that they each have good & bad qualities, streaths & weaknesses, baggage/insecurities & don't always handle everything the best way (especially in the past) but that they clearly love each other & are now in a much better place. Where they are willing to learn & grow & be vunrable by actually talking things out & apologising if they do something that hurts the other. Also wasn't, overcoming past hurts that are impacting your current, hard earned happiness by realising that you can't always be right/win all the time & that it's not always worth it if it means loosing what really matters to you, a huge part of the theme of the episode?

Mama Marcleline, we finally get more of your backstory & god dose it hurt. RIP queen, you did the best you could (am still scared to find out how you ended up pregnant though coz like, Hunson's a freak LMFAO!). Also, baby Marcy, I wanna hug you so bad 💔😭.

Ok, that song is so fucking cute that it makes me wanna bite my own cheeks off & eat them, and no, I don't care that that doesn't make sense.

That's how she got the band shirt? Omg, shoot me dead!

Oh, Simon, you know those banana guards can't do shit lol.

Omg Finn!!!!! Ok, so I kind of already saw that visual (being online, you can only avoid spoilers for so long), but still. My man, looking good. No prostetic? That's probably nice for amputees to see. The Jake Tattoo makes me both happy & sad because, on the one hand, it shows how much they love each other, but on the other, he probably got it because Jake is dead in this time period (I'm assuming).

Omg, grown-up Bronwyn is so cute 🥰!!!!!!!!

All the other cracks being revealed in others was a lovely touch. Thinking about the cracks as flaws or imperfections (or truma like the "damage" people accuire through being alive) & how society demonises that to the point where people feel like they have to hide them & then lash out at others who can't or refuse to hide theirs. Also, love the princess getting pants, lol. The angry monster secretly having a cracked face the whole time got me ok . Like, no wonder it hated the palace for how they acted towards glass boy. When it first saw him, it was probably so happy to know that someone like it existed & then was so hurt that Glass Boy was trying to change himself to be like everyone else.

Yes, Glass boy, kill those assholes!!!!! I hate hypocrites. It's sadly realistic, though. Sometimes, it really is the people with the most flaws who wanna condemn people the most.

#adventure time #adventure time distant lands #distant lands #bubbleline #princess bubblegum #marceline #marceline the vampire queen #distant lands episode 2 #adventure time distant lands episode 2 #adventure time: distant lands #didn't bother posting about the first episode because while it was cute & i love bmo it wasn’t a paticularly intresting episode to me #also please no hate about my bubblegum opinions #you're allowed to dislike her #but I'm allowed to like her #yes she's got issues but so does pretty much every character in the show & I happen to think it makes her intresting #can't believe finn flashed a kingdom #& PB wasn't empressed at all lol #no spoilers for the rest of DL or F&C please

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countrymusiclover · 1 year ago

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19 - Growling up too Fast

Part 20

The Texas Tire Family

Tags just ask - @supernaturalgirl31 @bvbwestfall @bubble-blu @patriciaplictisita @liesanddreams @bethanymccauley

Aurora’s age is 12

Evelyn’s age is 11

Montana is 2

Slumping down on the bed in our bedroom I sighed covering my face with my hands. “Georgie. Would you stop freaking out. It’s not really a date.” Aurora had asked us if the boy she was talking with from the mall could come bowling with us.

2 Years Later

“She’s too young, Y/n. I don’t even like her talking to any boys.” He threw his hands up from his sides coming home from work. The kids were in the living room watching cartoons while we talked this over.

Dropping my hands beside me on the bed I sighed heavily. I loved my husband truly but he was being a little ridiculous over this. “Georgie, she’s not 13 yet. So it’s just her asking if a friend can come bowling with our family. It ain’t that big of a deal.”

“But it is that big of a deal honey. Her and boys are too weird right now. So I say no. I don’t want her even talking to a boy.” He rolled his eyes going to the closet , shrugging his work shirt off and finding one of his dark green ones he wore when he was home.

Getting up from the bed I slapped my hands on the pockets of my jeans. “Look, you're making this a bigger deal than it really is. And if you think about it, she's not doing anything as reckless as we did.”

“Maybe you’re right honey…” He walked over to me once pulling the shirt all the way on. He wrapped his arms around me hugging me like we always did when he got back from work. “I just don’t want her to get hurt.”

Wrapping my arms around his neck I snuggled into his embrace. “We’re just going bowling, Georgie. I promise you it’s nothing as serious as our date with Missy was. Now let’s go tell the kids we’re going.” Tugging him towards the door he opened it and let me leave the room first with him following behind me.

Georgie and I were laying on his bed in his bedroom playing some music through his player. Laying on my stomach he was laying on his back with us just staring at each other. My foot was tapping in the air to the song until someone knocked on his door. “Hey, can I ask you guys something?” Missy came into the room shutting the door behind her.

“What’s up?” Georgie hit pause on the player sitting upright on the bed.

Missy locked the door where I could tell she was trying to keep whatever she was asking us a secret. “Think you could drop me off at the movies Saturday night. Cause I was kind of hoping to go with Marcus. But I don’t want mom to know otherwise she will make it weird.”

“Ah, so you're trying to go on a secret date.” Georgie tilted his head to the side with a light smirk that changed into a disgusting look. “I don’t know how I feel about this.”

Sitting up on the bed with my legs crossed I smiled at Missy when she sighed putting her hands on her hips. “Come on, it's just a movie. You and Y/n go out together all the time.”

“But our parents know we’re together, Missy.” I put my hands in my lap smiling at her.

“Have you been out with him before?” Georgie began questioning.

His sister replied. “Never alone.”

“How old is this boy?” He asked again.

She knits her brows. “13.”

“Do his parents know about it?” Georgie pressed on with a third question.

She rolled her eyes at her brother. “What are you mom now? Come on Y/n can you convince him to help me. He always listens to you.”

“I don’t really like your growing up either, Mis. It means I am getting older when I just want to stay a kid like you.” I pointed out shrugging my shoulders at her sending her a kind smile knowing she really did like the young boy.

Georgie put his headphones around his neck putting his hands together with a confused look towards her. “You’re my sister, you and boys is weird. We’ll take you but Y/n and I are going.”

“Thank you, thank you.” Missy hugged us both running out of the room. When six o’clock came around we were driving to the movies where she asked from the backseat. “What do you think is going to happen?”

Georgie glanced out the rear view mirror raising a brow at her. “You thought that I was going to let you go to the movies alone with him? And besides, nothing is going to happen cause I’m there.”

“Missy, we’re just looking out for you.” I shifted and turned around in the passenger seat looking back at her. Reaching for her hand she put her hand in mine giving me a half smile. “So how serious is it with this boy Marcus?”

She smiled, listing off her other hand. “Well we’ve held hands, hugged once, we haven’t kissed but we did share a straw.”

“It ain’t that serious though. They haven’t even been on a date yet.” Georgie shrugged his shoulders, stopping at a red light.

Sending him a smirk I lightly blushed at my boyfriend when he gripped the steering wheel. “We had our first kiss before we went on a date. So basically we got pretty serious afterwards.”

“Cool it with that. And you never said you were against us not going on a date later. Even though we had kissed before ever having a date. So I knew you enjoyed it just as much as I did.” Georgie cleared his throat blushing while we went through the green light and turned into the movie theater.

“Oh I know that. He wouldn’t stop talking about kissing you when you went home.” Missy squealed from the backseat. Georgie rolled his eyes before we stopped at Marcus’s house.

Eve held up a bowling ball throwing it down the lane and it hit six pins on the first try. I smiled getting to my feet while Georgie was getting ready for his round. “That’s a good job, Eve.”

Connie was watching Montana for us since we just wanted it to be a family night but he was crying a lot which reminded me of Aurora when she was growing up. “Mommy, why is Rora sitting alone with that boy?”

“What now?” Georgie threw his bowling ball where it went in the gutter whipping his head around watching that his eldest daughter was sitting at the other table we had. She was sitting with the boy and they were eating cheese fries where they almost touched hands. “No touching!”

Aurora jumped away blushing. “Dad!”

Crossing my arms over my chest I walked over to him calling to our daughter and the boy. “It’s fine honey. Enjoy your food ... .now I thought we talked about this.”

“I don’t care for it, Y/n.” My husband mumbles under his breath while I throw my bowling ball, hitting an almost perfect game.

Tilting my head to the side I shook my head at him. “Georgie, seriously don’t make a scene here. We can’t help her growing up. We just have to accept that she isn’t going to stay five years old anymore.”

“I don’t want that to happen. Can't they just stay the same age forever." He shrugs his shoulders in defeat.

Putting my hands on his shoulders I met his gaze softly. "Look at it this way. We have two other kids after her. Evelyn is a year younger yes but she isn't looking at boys. And then we have baby Montana who won't be growing up for years."

"Mom, can we go to the Mexican restaurant after this?" Aurora asked, walking up to us with the boy following her.

Georgie sent me a glare until I elbow him lightly in the ribs. "Sure. Let's just pay here and we can go." The two ran off and Evelyn was finishing up her round while I intertwined my hand in his. "Hey, look at me Georgie. It will always be you and me."

He squeezed my hand, raising my hand up and kissing it gently. "You're right, darling. It's you and me always."

Comments really appreciated ❤️

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dent-de-leon · 11 months ago

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Once again, throwing my Molly thoughts upon you.

Sometimes I think about the times Molly is like extra soft with kids. Like Toya and that little firbolg child. I know there was a little bit of contention with how distant he was from Kiri, but I think it made sense because he and the Nein are a travelling adventuring group sent out on a dangerous task for the Gentleman, and like that is not safe for a growing baby Kenku, no, sir.

And sometimes I think that if he were to reconcile with Aldreda and meet his niece and step-nephew, he be so fucking great with them.

Yes!! I can't get over how compassionate Mollymauk really is ;; I think a lot about how Molly tries to hide the sight of Kylre's body from Toya, to shield her from the worst of it all...

When Molly was lost and all alone in the world, it was Toya who first saved him; he followed her song back to the carnival. To his new home. Toya reminisces fondly on how they both found their voice together, were able to really connect and anchor each other.

"The newest people we've had are Mollymauk and Yasha...He came after I did. We both found our voice together. I was very scared, and he wasn't talking--and together, we helped each other learn to have fun again."

Molly only lived a very short two years. In some ways, I imagine he still feels a bit childlike--and wouldn't be surprised if Toya still thought of herself as Molly's protector as much as he was hers. After all, she's the one who first takes him in, who tries to convince the rest of the circus he should stay. When Molly stumbles into their camp naked and shivering, looking so desperately lost and all alone? She wants the circus to keep him like a stray kitten, to make him a part of their little family.

I think Molly is able to connect so well with kids because it wasn't too long ago that he was so young and vulnerable and new to the world himself. He admits to Beau, "Oh! I just realized--I never had a childhood," and seems to agonize a bit over that loss. He recalls of his early life at the circus that, "I was a bit out of it. It's hard to remember. I wasn't speaking really. Do you have...memories, from your childhood?...It felt like that. It was all bright and more meaningful than it should be. There was just nothing. I was practically catatonic; I was barely speaking."

So it's easier for Molly to understand kids I think, because he still feels like his own childhood was just two years ago, because he's still finding his way in the world--still the Fool at the beginning of his journey.

I think about how Molly and Toya always had each other's backs. How Toya first brought him home, and then Molly picked her up in his arms and carried her away from Kylre's body. Promising her that everything would be okay. "I'm scared." "I know. It's going to be a bit rough, but it was for the best. I'm so sorry. Some people just turn. I'm so sorry...He got sick. There was something inside him. Something that made him do bad things, but it had to be taken care of. You're going to be alright."

He's gentle with her, comforting. When Jester reveals Kryle's head, Matt describes Toya as, "sobbing into your arms at this point. You feel her body shaking against her grasp." And Molly does his best to just hold on and reassure her. "I'm going to take her to the front of the boat and keep her far away from all that." Whenever Molly's being soft with Toya, I can't help but imagine it was exactly the same for Lucien with Aldreda.

As for the firbolg child, that always just breaks my heart; if this were any sort of scripted show, Molly being the one to comfort them and try to make them smile after everything, this moment of such compassion right before Mollymauk sacrifices himself...that would be a death flag if I've ever seen one. Mollymauk performing a little magic tragic to cheer up a child whose just lost everything? Completely fumbling it, but still being so earnest and warm, it made the kid happy all the same? Gifting him one of his own little trinkets, like a good luck charm?

The way Molly made sure to prioritize their comfort first, to check that he wouldn't scare them--because god, Molly's used to people only ever looking at him with fear. A devil, a demon, an outcast. But for just a moment, he's back at the circus putting on a show again, bringing a bit of joy to another lonely child? It's such a tiny thing, but it's another reminder of how much Molly's "choir practice" really means to him, how he really did try to leave every place better than he found it--

And the thing about Kiri is...even though Taliesin admitted Molly avoided ever getting too close to Kiri because he thought they were going to lose her, it's also very much because of Molly that she even survived to begin with.

In the swamp, Jester hears a desperate cry, and runs to help. Everyone else in the Nein try to tell her that it's a lost cause; they're not going to make it, it's too late, it's too much of a risk. Jester worries over what she should do, whether her chance to save them is already long gone.

And Molly? He's the one who makes a snap decision, who chooses then and there to go with Jester's instinct and try to protect this little creature in need. When he casts Enthrall, he ensures that they stay in the fight--and that Kiri isn't devoured right away. "Are we doing this? Well, we're doing this." It really feels like the deciding factor in whether or not Kiri was going to make it.

Molly is just...so soft hearted, and we see that side of him a bit in Lucien too. Especially with children or someone in need, Molly's always had this fierce protectiveness about him. I think a lot of it maybe stems from Lucien's own childhood--how he always tried so hard to shield his little sister from their parents, did everything he could to give her a better life. How he tended to his older brother's wounds after what their father did to him.

I want so badly for King to get the chance to reunite with Aldreda and his niece one day, I really do think he'd still be very good with kids, and very protective of the family he has left.

It just...breaks my whole heart that Lucien ached so terribly to be a part of their life, dreamed of it every day in the Claret Orders. Always imagined he'd get to come home one day and they'd be a family again. And even as Aldreda can't stand the very sight of him, wants absolutely nothing to do with him--it makes it hurt all the more that her other child clearly wants to know Lucien. He looks so excited to meet someone who looks just like his mom!! He gives Lucien a little wave before Aldreda sends him away! It just...really hurts to think that even though Aldreda herself turned him away, at least one of her children still wanted Lucien in their lives.

I can see Lucien's little niece and nephew maybe finding King one day, really wanting to get to know him--even though Aldreda wanted to burn that bridge. I don't think it'd ever stop them from being curious, from wondering why they've never met anyone from their mother's family or past. But when they're older, I can see them wanting to reach out to Kingsley, to reconnect. Especially if their mother is still as unhappy as she seemed that day.

I genuinely think the most tender moment we ever see of Lucien is when he tries to reach out to his niece for the first time. When he sees this baby tiefling that looks so much like his dear sister, the tiny bumps of her horns, her little round face...you can tell he's trying to be so very gentle and ginger with her, but the very moment he reaches for her, Aldreda reels back in disgust.

And it's his scars that make her react like that. The blood hunter scars from all the times he let himself get hurt chasing the desperate hope that he could ever see his sister again. That's just haunting. Of all things, it's Lucien's own pain and trauma that terrifies and reviles his sister the most. The final straw that makes him unworthy of being family to her. It's Aldreda seeing him as nothing but a stranger, a monster, another reminder of the horrific nightmare she always tried to forget.

"And what could you do for me? For us? You've been ignoring me for years, and at first it hurt, but then I came to realize it could be for the best. I could forget our family, leave the nightmares behind, make something good of my own...I don't recognize you anymore. Who knows what kind of danger you've brought to our doorstep just by coming!...You can't even tell me what you are now or what you've become!...It's too late, Lucien. It's too late. Maybe years ago, I don't know...I can't think properly. Just looking at you stirs up such evil feelings in me. It isn't fair, I know, but it's true. I look at you and I hear distant screams, I see again our brother's face leering, bloated with unnatural life."

Aldreda stabs him in the heart with every confession, every admission that her own brother terrifies her. That he just feels like some other terror of the past come back to haunt her. Lucien gave everything to try and spare his sister from their cruel parents and a bloodthirsty hag, but it still wasn't enough. It was never enough. He isolated himself, risked his life again and again, did whatever he thought was necessary to keep his sister safe--baring the scars of it all alone for years, trying to shoulder all that pain himself--and still. In the end...he's alone.

I think about Aldreda demanding, "How? How could we be a family again? I don't even know you." And Lucien's heartbroken promise that, "But you will know me. You could." And what hurts even more? I could see that same exact conversation playing out years later, between her and King. I want them both to have that kind of closure so bad. I want a oneshot where we get to see King meet his family again for the first time. A world where Aldreda would let her brother hold her child. A time where they can finally reunite and start to understand each other--

#mollymauk is just...so soft and has such a bleeding heart and it makes me so weak--#thinking forever about how kyvir wanted to talk to lucien and smiled and waved at him #thinking of marii doing the same if she ever met king in rexxentrum #thinking of a world where king's sister would finally welcome him home after everything #where they would both be willing to try and reach out and connect. be a part of each other's lives--

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sesamestreep · 1 year ago

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Din Djarin, 30

30. was it worth it? (from this list) further adventures in that modern au with anti-social baseball cap wearing single dad din djarin because i have no idea what's happening on the show anymore, let's doooo this

Once Din pulls into the driveway, he cuts the engine and sends up a tentative prayer to the universe that the sound is not enough to wake Grogu up. The kid is zonked out in his booster seat in the back, clutching the stuffed animal Din had won him at the fair—at the booth where you shoot a target with a water pistol to make it move, of course, because his aim is still worth writing home about after all these years—and seemingly unbothered by the sudden quiet. Din breathes a sigh of relief and then shifts his focus to the daunting task of trying to get this kid out of his seat, up two flights of stairs, and into the apartment without somehow waking him. It's not going to be easy.

With another sigh, Din opens the door and keeps it there with his foot as he digs around in the center console for his phone and his wallet before pulling the keys out of the ignition. Belatedly, he sees the golden light pouring from the open garage door and realizes Cal must be working in there still. Before Din can properly catch up, Cal is already outside and on his way over.

"I'll uh," Din says, as he gets out, gesturing back at the car, "I'll get this out of your way in a few, I just gotta get the kid upstairs first."

Cal shakes his head, already smiling. "No rush," he says, easily. "We're not going anywhere. And besides, you're always up early anyway. Do it in the morning."

"I don't want to block you all in, if you need to—"

"Like I said, we're not going anywhere. It's fine."

"Well—”

"I'll ask Merrin, if it'll make you feel better! But she will definitely also say it's fine."

Merrin is Cal's—well, Din isn't sure if they're married or not. Cal doesn't wear a ring and Merrin wears dozens, so it's hard to tell. They're definitely a couple, because they do that seamless first person plural thing all the time when they talk about each other, but if they happen to refer to each other in the third person, they just use each other's names, rather than “my spouse” or “my partner”, except for the time Cal—perhaps accidentally—referred to her as "my Merrin" and she made a face and mimed punching him in the stomach for it. They live on the first floor and generally manage the property because they know the owner, which means Cal has all of his tools and his work bench in the garage for his various projects and Merrin tends to the garden out back, which grows a bunch of vegetables and strange plants that Din isn't convinced should be able to survive in this climate. He suspects she has a way with these things but has never bothered to ask about it.

"I'll take your word for it," Din says, reluctantly. "And I appreciate it."

"No problem," Cal replies. "Need any help?"

Din opens the door and starts unbuckling Grogu from his seat. "Uh, I think I'm alright, but thanks."

Cal leans slightly back, so as not to be in the way when Din gently lifts Grogu out of the car and tucks him over his shoulder. "Wow, you really tuckered him out, huh?"

"Yeah. We went to the fair, the, uh, Apple and Trout something or other...?"

Cal laughs. "Peach and Chowder Festival," he corrects. "I know it well."

"This is a strange town."

"I know that too. Looks like you did alright, though."

"Yeah," Din says, gingerly lifting the tail of the stuffed shark in acknowledgement. Another parent at the booth had claimed it was a knockoff of some famous trademarked shark but Din doesn't know about all that. He only knows it was the next best thing in Grogu's mind when there were no frog or lizard plushes to be won. "He's happy, at least."

Cal tips his head to the side, curiously. "You didn't enjoy yourself?"

"Ah, well, you know...crowds and lots of noise and kids all hopped up on sugar...that's not really my thing. But it's not about me, it's about him, so..."

"Yeah," Cal says, with a small smile. He puts a hand gently on Grogu's back. "Bet that makes it all worth it, huh?"

Din suddenly feels very stupid for never bothering to ask Cal or Merrin if they have kids. He’s never been great at that stuff, asking the right questions to really get to know people, and so he can only guess what their situation is. He thinks they're about his age, give or take a few years, and that means they're young enough that, if they had any children, he expects they'd still be living together, but he's not sure about that. They could have kids old enough to be living on their own, he supposes. And they've always been kind to Grogu, never once making a snide comment about him not talking much or needing his space sometimes, the way some other folks do. Sometimes, Cal will even let the kid hang out in the garage to watch him work, waving away Din's concerns about him being too much trouble by pointing to Beady, the cat that's almost always curled up around his neck or perched on his shoulder.

"If I can work with this one around," Cal's fond of saying, "your son's no bother."

Still, Din's not sure how exactly to ask that politely—if they have children of their own or not—especially if the answer is more complicated than a simple yes or no. And there is something complicated and sad about what Cal's expression is doing right now.

"Anyway," he says, cheerfully after a moment, and the expression is gone, tucked away somewhere. "I'll get out of your hair. Just wanted to offer some help if you needed it."

Din clears his throat, thinking about how his therapist is always talking about how he should get better at accepting the kindness other people offer him and also something about how his upbringing had convinced him there's some nobility in suffering needlessly. He probably can get Grogu inside and into bed without any assistance, but it would be easier with help. There had also been a discussion in therapy about depriving people of the satisfaction of showing their love for him by turning down their offers to be of service.

"Actually," he says, feeling foolishly nervous about something so small and seemingly easy, "if you could grab the door for me, that would be a huge help."

"Of course," Cal says, with an easy smile. "Happy to."

"And let’s just, uh, make sure we don't lose the shark,” Din says, as they make their way up the steps. “I don’t think I have it in me to win another one.”

#what is thisssss??? WHO KNOWS???#honestly I’m just trying to capture the energy of the one prompt Phil did where quigon was a Montessori teacher #I might have the details wrong but still #she said what if the Jedi all got to grow old and hang out and be crunchy middle aged weirdos together #and I thought that was great #I just started playing Fallen Order and I love Cal so much I just wanted to write him #I haven’t even met Merrin yet but I love her already I can’t wait for her to destroy me #according to my actual research cal and merrin would be pretty close in age to Din during the Mandalorian??#which is wild???#so here you go #middle aged merrical very good for the soul #cal loves everybody and he just wants to help he’d be such a good neighbor he’s shaped like a FRIEND #okay anyway I added a tag to all my other modern AU Mandalorian prompts on my blog #so you can read them all together if you want #But definitely not necessary to follow anything here #they just do all happen in the same universe #a modern universe if you will #that tag is >>>#single dad green baby #please enjoy #because the chances of me putting any of them on ao3 is slim #taylor swift song prompts #ask #firstelevens #din djarin #grogu #i am not dealing with a new naming convention for him I’m too tired #cal kestis #nightsister merrin #merrical

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unhonestlymirror · 11 months ago

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Some of Trans Rights fighters so often remind me of smoker patients in the Pulmonology department.

You tell a person, "You have bronchiectasis and/or COPD, you should stop smoking because it slowly kills your lungs" - but such patients are really hard to terrify, to convince to drop off their obsession. They genuinely believe nothing bad will happen if they secretly smoke one cigarette, and they can be pretty aggressive about that. They usually die the next year from cancer. At first, you throw all your strength to help the poor, to save them from such a terrible fate - but the more and more patients you have, the little by little lose your desire because you realise: such people actually don't need your help. Such people realise how deep in shit they are only when it's too late, and not a single living soul can prevent that. Such people often don't even realise that till death.

Doctors are also people, and we often want to use the George Carlin's language: Stop smoking, you idiot, or you will fucking die. You will die! Some of us, of course, understand that the habit can be only replaced with another habit and the ban will lead to nothing, and the doctor's goal is to convince the patient, "You and only you are responsible for your body" - but it's so exhausting. It's so exhausting - and the only thing you want to say is eventually, "You know, what? Keep killing yourself, I don't care." But you can't say so because you're a doctor.

Returning to the trans topic: when you see all those clinics who prescribe mastectomy and hormones to children and teens - children and teens, it's normal for them to be insecure in their own bodies, they are growing up and they have monstrously sharp changes in hormones and they have growing tissues, growing bones, growing bones hurt really fucking much, if only all adults remembered how it feels to have a growing body - you realise that first of all, such kids and teens, both trans and cis, need psychological support, someone who allows them to cry and scream and complain a lot because that's what their bodies scream for. Not hormones who will just make it worse, and not the mastectomy. But you can't say that because otherwise you're a transphobe and a terf, and even if you try to explain that, they throw you links on pseudoscientifical articles which often contradict each other.

And then, you want to say, "Yk what? Keep going, I don't care." And it's only a matter of time when people who were screaming of the holy properties of hormones/antidepressants/drugs for mental disorders and other stuff which any adequate pharmacist will prescribe only with lab results and only after all possible therapies have been tried and have had no effect - yes, it's only a matter of time when the collective silence appears with rare interspersed regrets and complaints about side effects of such treatment. Fortunately and not, most of humanity just needs the most hard-to-get medicine - the improved quality of life - more sleep, less social media, more good food, more physical activity, fresh air, more light, more water, more social interactions with people who make you feel good, more money - not the drugs. In fact, it's already happening. Maybe it explains why pseudofighters for trans rights are so aggressive.

Btw, when most people can't get themselves improved life quality, then we have wars. The more time people try to get themselves such medicine and fail - the more brutal wars we have. A restart mechanism that can not be avoided.

#just some thoughts

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pekkhum · 6 months ago

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This is partially an agreement, but also an extension, with my own story:

I managed to repress my nature for 37 years, partially because there were a few outlets for that energy. I hit my low when my marriage fell apart (not really a surprise, now that we each know what we were going through) and I nearly acted to stop there. Ultimately, I realized this would leave my daughter seeing that neither parent had chosen to stay with her and I wasn't having any of that, but in that decision, I never actually decided to live.

I went most of a decade in this state, basically trying to die without technically doing it, very Intentionally making choices that lead me into ever growing states of risk and legitimately daydreaming about ways to handle dangerous situations that would risk everything in a reasonable way, while making sure my kid had whatever she needed. It isn't like I never seemed to have fun, after all I wouldn't have been a good parent that way, I just made sure that I had good life insurance and correctly selected beneficiaries at all times, while slowly destroying my body.

Thanks to COVID, I wound up at home all of the time. My hair grew long and I got a thrill and the feeling of it brushing across my back, or the weight of it in the shower. My nails got longer and I decided to shape them, instead of trimming them. I had always enjoyed stopping to look at gorgeous or cute dresses, but I suddenly was struck by a sadness, knowing that the way I had treated my body, I'd never be able to wear the ones I loved... Not that I wanted to, or anything, you understand, I'm just starting to work out and eat better so that I could, okay?

It was around this stage of denial and discovery that r/egg_irl content started to hit the front page, because of a few particularly good memes, I loved them and interacted a bit, so the algorithm decided to keep sprinkling them into my feed. When they scrolled by, I would giggle and upvote and feel happy for a few moments.

Eventually, I subscribed and spent more and more time reading those, r/traaa, r/mtf, etc. and one day, I just couldn't resist responding to a comment that resonated with me. Before I knew it I was talking about my trans experience and joking and picking a name.

It was three days later that the understanding sunk from my surface thoughts and actually hit home. I had been reading on what it is to be transgender and everything kept hitting home, hard, but what finally broke down that wall was reading about internalized transphobia. Every line was familiar. Each effect was my experience. Finally, I broke down and cried wailing about how I didn't want to be trans (who wants to be hated and hunted), but once I was done, I finally felt better.

From that day forward, it has been like a future actually exists. There is a life that I actually want to live out there and I am heading toward it, in spite of the fear my society imposes on me. I actually want to live to see it!

In my case, the knowledge that transition exists did save my life and does so in a continuing manner. Not only am I finally truly alive, but I'm no longer carefully trying to accidentally die.

But, the habits aren't gone. I still barely live, much of the time, I still fear troubling others, I still fail to reach out. I still cut myself off and try to disappear into the background.

I literally discussed keeping in touch with a lovely freshly omnigendered person that I met because we got along so well and you know what: neither of us has reached out. I fear that xir likely also thinking of what a bother they must be and how she can't initiate, in case the other is just being nice. I know that's what I'm thinking.

I am getting a little better at accepting that I'm allowed to want things for myself and every now and then I convince myself that I can "waste" the money on me. It is usually clothes that manage this, unsurprisingly, but everything else tends to just fill my bookmarks.

But, I have yet to accept the idea that I deserve to exist. I'm something wrong, something unwelcome, something unlovable. It isn't that any of this is true, logically, it is that I believe it at such a deep level that my logic can't touch it. I struggle to accept an invitation to help or to shared time, because I'm clearly just a burden to the person who offered it. I wouldn't want to trouble them by taking their outstretched hand,,,

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation. the goal, for them, was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-deprivation that so many of us learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

#I probably needed this #judging by the crying #sorry for the long post

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countless-potr · 1 year ago

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I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters, it was a full house. Wasn't easy to get all of us spending quality time together. There's a couple moments that really stick out in my brain though. Trying to watch the Grinch while the volume was out on the living room tv and eventually using the power of our combined puppy dog eyes to convince our mom to let us watch it on the working tv in her room all piled up in the bed with her.

Climbing the tree in the back yard we weren't supposed to climb while our mom and dad screamed at each other in the house. All of us got up there. 5 kids one tree, I'd always try and climb the highest. There was a little valley behind our house. Maybe more like a storm drain then anything. And we'd just stare out into it and talk. My big brother would always talk about how he was going to get away from here and one day he'd come back for us all. (He did get away but he never came back. I didn't expect him to. He was never any kind of a hero.) Just up in a tree for an hour daydreaming out loud about going somewhere where there where no spankings, screaming parents, or bugs, and taking care of ourselves.

A much happier memory though was Mom reading to us. All of us at once, ages 15 to 5. I don't imagine it was easy to find a good book for that but one day she borrowed a book from my brother from his school library and it was perfect. Fantasy, adventure, pretty simple for the younger kids, not to simple for the older ones, and it started with a boy just like me. Wearing dirty hand me down clothes, being locked away, scared, hungry, miserable, and escaping into a good and magical place. I think we all wanted to escape like that even Mom. My uncle came and took us all to see the first movie in theaters before Mom finished the first book for us. That was so special. We never got to go out like that.

I think it was less then a year later that someone called social services. It wasn't the first time but it was going to be the last. All the dreams of getting away don't really prepare you for what's on the other side. You don't get to keep all the people you love and there wasn't new better parents waiting. Just a series of guardians who would care for me for about a year before deciding they "weren't a good fit" and sending me on my way. The world changed around me constantly, I figured out how to cope, how to mask, how to recenter myself with the shows loved and the books I reread over and over. You don't get to keep a lot of stuff with you. Finding out you're moving the week before or even the day of meant a lot of shoving things in trash bags and misplaced possessions. But every school has a library, you map it out and you're set.

I kept up with every new book in that series my mom would read. They'd take so long to come to the school libraries but I'd wait, happy and excited for more. They got darker and it felt like they were growing up with me. The 3rd was my favorite, I didn't like the 5th but the last book was the first time I remember being truly disappointed with the series. I was in highschool and probably to old to not notice the series' flaws. But at the time I kinda felt like an outsider to the love the rest of my family still had for it.

Growing up I still saw my siblings and parents on the weekends and we all stayed attached to these books, talking with my mom about the newest one, and getting excited when my little brother finally caught up with the me so we could debate theories. But then the last one came out and I was alone disliking it. What a weird emotion that was. To feel lonely because of a bad book.

I am gender fluid, my gender depends on the hour, sometimes it's this thing, or that thing, or many things, or nothing. I took a long time to figure it out but while I thought I was cis and heterosexual (also not that) I was learning all I could about the queer community on tumblr. Not the best place to do that. But I was in a group home at the time and then I was unbelievably broke. It's hard to go out like that. While there I kept seeing stories of one of my favorite childhood authors giving all her money to charities, supporting women's rights and the LGBT community. She made a beloved kids character gay! That seemed very cool to me. Didn't matter that it wasn't in the book. The only gay characters I had ever seen in fiction were in fanfiction.

I'm almost 30 now. Things have changed. I'm living with my parents, isn't that weird. Dad's gotten old, Moms losing her hearing, we're all still poor. I haven't forgiven them but I still love them and there's no point being angry now. The world's gone to shit. I'm sure you've noticed the constant bad news, like remember that author I told you about? The one that seemed amazing and open minded about the LGBT community? Yeah, turns out she's a monster. A paranoid powerful woman trying to use her money and influence to destroy the people she's scared of. And she's scared of me. A rat poor living with their parents 29 year old, how pathetic is she. I know compassion can be hard when you're scared but there is never a good reason to be cruel. I hope she deletes her socials, retired to the country and spends the rest of her days sitting on her porch alone saying hateful things to the air where no one can hear her and no one cares.

She's trying to take something from me. Something far more horrible then a few mediocre kids books, but I think I'm going to keep this one little thing. Just this one, the first one. I got rid of the rest. I've had this for over 20 years and its mine now. It's a memory. A little dream. Like a painting in a childhood bedroom. You didn't ever need or want to know the political views of the artist and it doesn't really matter if it's good or not it's just yours.

Trans Lives Matter

#personal #trans lives matter #transphobia #rambling #jk rowling #harry potter #wasnt going to tag them because this is about me #not the books or the author and certainly not about the discourse #this isnt a statement about morals #or right and wrong #its just a late night flow of thoughts about my complicated emotional relationship with the books #“these books ment a lot to me growing up” isnt an excuse to give a hateful person more of your money as an adult #but that meaning doesnt go away #and those feelings can be hard to deal with #especially when everyone acts like hating this thing is a sign of righteousness #abuse tw

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what-if-rpg · 1 year ago

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Welcome to the family, MAR! Your application to BLAINE ANDERSON was accepted. We’re really happy to have you around! Make sure to read the beginners checklist, and remember, have fun! We can’t wait to roleplay with you! Have fun!

IN CHARACTER

CHARACTER NAME: Blaine Devon Anderson CHARACTER AGE & DATE OF BIRTH: 28, April 5th OCCUPATION: Broadway actor and singer-songwriter FACE CLAIM: Darren Criss HOMETOWN & CITY WHERE LIVES NOW: Westerville, OH & New York City, NY SEXUAL ORIENTATION & GENDER: Gay, cis male RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Married to Kurt Hummel POSITIVE TRAITS: Driven, passionate, supportive NEGATIVE TRAITS: Dramatic, impulsive, vulnerable CHARACTER QUOTE/LYRIC: Sometimes if you want to make change, you’ve got to make a little noise.

HEADCANONS

Growing up with two parents who have busy jobs, and a brother who seems to be perfect at everything he does and is always the centre of attention, isn’t always easy. As a kid, Blaine idolized his big brother. He admired Cooper’s talent and confidence and wanted to be just like him, but Cooper always seemed to do everything better. No matter how hard Blaine tried to keep up with him despite their age difference, Cooper didn’t always seem to know, or care, that Blaine being ten years younger meant he didn’t have as much experience as Cooper himself, and he was extremely critical of his little brother. Cooper had no issues with pushing Blaine into the background — both literally and figuratively. But the harder Cooper pushed, the harder Blaine tried to live up to his expectations. And Cooper wasn’t the only one who had high expectations of Blaine — his father did too. There always seemed to be an underlying tension in the Anderson home, and Blaine often felt like he had to compete with Cooper for their father’s attention. Blaine worked hard on his talents and made sure to get good grades, and to always be polite and charming, hoping to earn his father’s affection that way. Trying to live up to his father and brother’s incredibly high expectations is one of the reasons Blaine is the perfectionist he is today.

When Blaine came out of the age of thirteen, his father’s reaction wasn’t exactly what Blaine had been hoping for. There wasn’t much of a reaction at all, really, and the fact that his father almost seemed to pretend like it had never happened made things even more strained between them than they already were. Blaine would often feel like his father hoped that rebuilding a car with him or taking him to a football game might make him straight. Rationally, Blaine knew his dad loved him, but sometimes he couldn’t help but feel like he had to tone down his personality, to try to fit in more, and that being gay was something to do quietly in their house. There were times when they would barely speak to each other, one of them being after hiss father tried to convince him to choose a more reliable career path when Blaine announced he wanted to apply for NYADA, which resulted in many fights.

At school, things weren’t exactly easier when Blaine came out. A long year of bullying escalated at a Sadie Hawkins dance, and after ending up in the hospital and some long talks with his parents, Blaine ended up transferring to Dalton Academy. It was easy to blend in at his new school, the uniform and anti-bullying policy offering a feeling of safety Blaine hadn't felt in a long time. But sometimes he couldn’t help but feel like he was playing a role instead of truly being himself, and part of him regretted running from his bullies.

While the performing arts, theatre and music have always been Blaine’s main interests and biggest passions, that doesn’t mean that it’s all he’s ever been interested in. As a kid, his parents let him pursue every interest his young self could think of, from piano, singing, dancing and acting to fencing, tennis and football. He climbed trees with other kids, read books at an impressive speed, learned how to bake and joined many clubs, much like he did in his senior year at McKinley. That doesn’t mean he was good at everything he tried, but that never stopped him from being open to trying new things. And he never stopped having a wide array of interests and hobbies — his taste in music is still all over the place, he still loves anything superheroes-related, still boxes, does yoga and attends aerobics classes, loves watching sports games and plays quite a few instruments.

When Kurt and Blaine moved back to New York after getting married, Blaine was offered a second chance at NYADA. After graduating with honours, he starred in Hairspray, West Side Story, Little Shop of Horrors, the very first LGBTQ production of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf (alongside his husband) and, most recently, in Grease as Danny Zuko for which he has won a Tony. Performing on Broadway isn’t the only thing Blaine has been doing career-wise, though. When Audrey was born, Blaine took a break from the stage and started to focus more on writing music, and he can now proudly call himself a Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter. His last performance as Danny Zuko is in just a few days, and he plans to take a little break again, to be able to spend more time with Audrey and to write new music. Blaine is also an advocate for protecting LGBTQ+ youth and anti-bullying. He speaks at schools and performs at charity benefits, and tries to volunteer as much as he can. Blaine is grateful for every opportunity he gets, and he knows that no matter what, he will always find ways to make art and help people.

CONNECTIONS

PAM & ANTONIO ANDERSON (Parents): Blaine has always been much closer to his mother than to his father, especially after his coming out. Although his mother can be a little intense sometimes, she has always been very supportive of Blaine and is still his biggest fan. While his father is still much more emotionally distant, and Blaine still talks to his mother a lot more than he does to his father, he and Blaine have worked hard on improving their relationship. It’s still far from perfect, but things are much better between them now. COOPER ANDERSON (Half-brother): While there are still times when Blaine feels overshadowed by his brother, and they still bicker sometimes, their relationship is much better than it used to be. He knows that at the end of the day, Cooper has his back and tries his best to support him in his own way. KURT HUMMEL (Husband): They’ve certainly had their ups and downs in the past, but things are going better than ever between Kurt and Blaine. They’ve gotten much better at communicating, which is something Blaine continues to work on, and there is no one he would rather spend the rest of his life with or raise their daughter with. AUDREY HUMMEL-ANDERSON (Daughter): Blaine had always known that he wanted to have kids some day, and he absolutely adores being a father. He sings her to sleep every night, happily lets her paint his nails and is always up for a tea party or dance party. While he tries not to spoil her too much, he often can’t resist her pleading eyes and finds himself giving in to her requests more often than not. SAM EVANS & TINA COHEN-CHANG (Best friends): When Blaine felt lost at McKinley, Sam was the one who was there for him and stopped him from running away to Dalton, and Blaine will always be grateful for the way Sam helped him through that rough time. Together with Tina, they formed an inseparable trio during their senior year, and his friendship with both of them is still as strong as ever. RACHEL BERRY (Best friend): Blaine has admired Rachel’s talent and ambition from the very first time he’d met her, and while he already considered her a friend when they were both in high school, the two of them truly became close when they both found themselves back in Ohio. Their bond became even stronger when Rachel agreed to be their surrogate and he considers her one of his best friends.

#Blaine Anderson #Darren Criss #Accepted #RP #RPG #Glee RP #Glee RPG #Glee

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cagenewman · 2 months ago

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I'd say that it's pretty safe to assume that I'm crazy about you girls when I say that I don't mind pulling your hair out of the drain or the one million bottles of shampoo in the shower, Rosalyn wanting to paint my toe nails, making me try out her new lip gloss… I'm pretty in love with you guys. Yeah, see? Besides, the keeping you warm part is fun for me, anyway, so I don't mind. I'd be happy to wrap you up and smother you with kisses or rub your back or whatever it is that's going to keep you from turning into a Cordelia-shaped popsicle. I know, I'm dreading the day that she comes home from school and tells me that a boy chased her around the playground and tugged at her hair, because you know that I'm going to be thinking about chasing you around the playground and what that meant for us long term. I… guess you're right about that, yeah. That's one thing we don't have to worry about with our kids, they're growing up and living in a house where their parents have lived a normal, healthy, loving relationship. And not every kid can say that. So that does make me feel a little bit better. It's a weird feeling, isn't it? When Colton's mom sent me the paper work for all of that, when she signed over all rights to him, gave up on being his mom, it was such a surreal feeling, just realizing that I loved him with my whole heart and she didn't love him at all. Or at least it felt like that. I'm sure you kind of felt the same way with Rosalyn, right? No, I think -- as much as I wish we could say, hey, I'm your dad, that's it, I think it's her right to know. Her right to decide what to do with that information, I would never want to take that away from her. I am interested. There's really no part of you that I'm not interested in learning about, you know? Including what you look like with a baby bump. I don't want to just make sure that you're healthy, I want to make sure that I am, too. I know we talk a lot about your biological clock, and I know it's different for men and women, but if we're very serious about this, then I want to cut out drinking except for the occasional beer here and there, glass of wine with dinner. And the smokes. I'll admit that I've been hitting those a little harder than I probably should lately. No, that makes sense -- and so does tracking everything, I just … feel like a little bit of a hypocrite if I'm lecturing my son about safe sex and then playing Russian roulette with my boys and your eggs. Just saying.

That's true, I have patronized my own brother's muffin stand, and I'm pretty sure that he would just give them to me for free if I asked, but we're going to have blueberry muffins for breakfast every day this week. Although with schools being closed tomorrow, I kind of figured that we could spend the rest of Creek Fest just enjoying everything we can? I should probably work a shift or two at the shop, but if you wanted to come in with me, we can do husband-and-wife tag team and convince people to buy all my things. I… don't know what Kellan's into? I know it sounds cliche, but I genuinely think that he's more into personality than he is looks, you know? Good people, humble people, down to earth people who aren't after is money or blueberry fortune. I know, I know, I do, but we had also known each other since we were kids and I just… don't know where his head is at. I knew where my head was at, I knew that I loved you, I knew that I was ready, and more importantly, I knew that you were ready. I'm actually pretty sure that you were ready before I was. I think that's what bothers me, is that he went behind our backs. Which I get, he's a teenager, he's going to do that, but it stung, you know? I think talking to him together is a good idea. He's still grounded, though. Another week after Creek Fest. Bribing might work… but again, teenaged boy, do you really think that's going to stop him from doing anything?

No, you haven't, but I'm just saying that you can't start now. Too late, not that I think you're going to, but figured it's kind of one of those -- let me point out the obvious. Wait till you have to pull out more blonde hair out of the drain because Rosalyn's hair is getting longer and it's just as blonde as mine. Maybe every once and a while I could get along with going outside and letting you keep me warm in between since I don't see us taking long to grill the steaks. Mainly because we'd be grilling a burger or hot dog for Rosalyn since she's not quite up to chomping on a whole steak yet. She likes a few bites but that's about it, nor is it enough to keep her belly filled. It's only a matter of time before crushes are going to happen, even at a young age. She likes dancing, a lot, she also really enjoys gymnastics, and that will keep her busy if she's always doing that. Men are assholes, but not all men, but it's something we're inevitably going to have to deal with when she comes home and says she likes a boy from kindergarten and then says she loves a boy, even though she won't have a clue what that means, but will be going off of seeing us in a healthy relationship. It'll be cute, and you will not be attempting to strike the fear into a five year old when that time comes. Nor sending her older brother to do just that either. You don't have to worry about that, he signed his rights away all too easily, he has no plans on coming back for her, and you don't have to worry about coming up against walls that will suddenly make everything harder. It's selfish that I wish I could just legally put you on the birth certificate and let you be the father, but given later in life, depending on health she has a right to know, I know that we will have to be honest. You haven't, and honestly, I loved being pregnant with her. Okay, I grumbled but I was on my feet working two jobs, I was tired, but it went really well. I have ultrasounds and photos I can show you if you're interested. Aside from needing the epidural everything went smoothly, so I'm not really worried about pregnancy other than how difficult it might be getting pregnant the older I get. You'll always make sure I'm safe and healthy, but you also have to be calm. We may only get one shot at this and I want you to enjoy this, ever moment of it. When it happens. I can talk to my doctor, see what she says about coming off birth control, I don't want to do it this near the wedding in case it could mess with hormones without discussing it with her first. I mean.. not necessarily, there are techniques of taking temperatures and tracking cycles to make sure you're not having sex when you're likely to get pregnant. It's a natural form of birth control, apparently. Something I can talk to the doctor about, I will make an appointment this upcoming week or next.

Kellan will survive it's not like he doesn't end up baking the blueberries into delicious muffins to sell, so he can't be that heartbroken! Is that what he's into blondes? Because I have a few friends who are blonde. Or is he a brunette? Red head? I'm just saying I have friends of all kinds. I would like to enjoy our honeymoon, and I can get a leave from school due to it, but I want to celebrate Colton so I'm figuring after the fact. I get it, but kids at this age feel like they're much more grown up then they are. I mean, I hate to be the one to point it out but I was fifteen when we -- you know... decided we were ready for those adult steps. I'm not saying we should encourage it, of course, but we need to be more level headed because it's not something you want to traumatize him with or embarrass him. Think talking to him together might be good, or I can talk to him first and then you come in and we talk together, set some ground rules. Mainly because I get there's always chances it could happen, but in our house, there's rules to be respected. If he's watching his sister there's no sneaking off with the girlfriend to get handsy, Rosalyn's safety comes first. There's also just general respect for his body and her body. So maybe, going at it from that way and it will hold him off for awhile longer. If not, thinking bribing will work? No sex until after eighteen and you'll get so much money for a car or something? Maybe not the best idea but I'm thinking off the top of my head here.

#talking with cordelia

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cynettic · 3 years ago

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hi, i hope i'm not bothering you, but i can order a Scaramouche × Kitsune reader, the two met before the vision hunt (and before he was a fatui if you want) the reader was always in the same place, sometimes having a conversation , the good old routine, but with the hunting of visions the reader disappeared not wanting to give up his own vision, and years later a reunion, SFW or NSFW is by your will, thank you, I really admire your work

Summary - Scaramouche met you as a child, growing up with the constant assurance that you would be right there, sitting at your spot where he could meet you with every visit. He isn't happy when you suddenly disappear.

Pairing - Kitsune!Reader x Yan!Scaramouche

Warning - Slight Yandere warnings?

Penpal - Ahhh- hope this is what you were looking for. I couldn't find a spot to put much nsfw unless I considered writing more for the series ( I could, just put a request in if thats what you’re looking for ). But I hope you liked it!! You're not bothering me at all and I'm glad you like my work!

A/N - Alright- so considering that with the 2.1 update with Scaramouche coming in, I just wanna state beforehand that I wrote this prior so I dont know if we learn about his backstory or anything!!

Link for Part 2

Stay With Me

Scaramouche was used to the routine he’d found himself going along with every visit to Inazuma. As a child he’d pass through the wild fields that stretched just beside his hometown, adventurous and curious with all the tenacity of a child.

And of course you, a kitsune that sat perched on the ground awaiting the Kitsune Saiguu, was bound to notice him. Unlike the other earth kitsune statues, you hadnt turned to stone during your wait. Instead, staying in the same place did you interact with travellers and the locals, which included Scaramouche.

“Fox person!” The little boy chanted, pulling at the hems of your clothing. Bright blue eyes bore into your own, and you slowly shifted your head to pay attention to the boy who was on the verge of bouncing on you.

Humming in reply to his excitement, the little boy paused, both of his small hands still tightly clasping the fabric of your clothes. Soft matted hair brushed past his face in a messy manner, calling out the boy for his boundless running and rebellious urge to keep his hair messy despite his parents wishes.

“Play with me!”

Staring at the boy only a moment longer, you simply chuckled at his antics. “I’m afraid I cannot move from the spot in which I dwell~ Perhaps I’ll be able to entertain you if you bring cards?”

But the young boy had made up his mind at the statement to which you couldn't move. A pitiful frown enfluged his face as he cast you the nastiest glare a five year old could muster. “Boring!” He shouted into the distance of the fields, dramatically turning on his heels and bouncing up into a sprint away. You watched his small figure fade away into the background, absentmindedly sighing and returning to your mindless thoughts.

As a child, Scaramouche would pass by you fairly often. Frequent when he asked you to play with him, and storming away with the same expression when you denied him. Nothing out of the ordinary, you’d lived for an exceptional amount of time, and even though grumpy children were not your specialty, you’d grown accustomed to their behaviour.

Growing up, Scaramouche got no better. You soon noticed his violent tendencies before they became an issue, the way the children shied away from him when playing Temari. Hiding in front of a tough exterior, he scared them away and laughed, approaching you later with tearful sob.

“Will you play with me?” He asked again, trying to hide the fact that he still wept when the other children pushed him away.

But your answer stayed the same, helping him wipe his tears and coaxing him into your arms. Not the first time you’d made contact with a human, but the first time you held them in such an affectionate manner.

It was clear Scaramouche was beginning to see you as some sort of pillar of reassurance when he began running away from home to simply ask to be held. You always welcomed him with open arms, urging him to head back to his household and sort things out. There was no harm in simply providing love and comfort for a child who received none was there?

“Now now, hurry back home little one. Your parents must be growing awfully worried if you’re out by this time at night.”

“My parents dont care about me!”

Darkness slowly pooled into the fields, an obscure shade covering the two of you from the tree you were under. Biting back form your normal emotionless statements, you pondered for something to soothe and convince the boy. Misunderstandings and hardships were normal from what youd seen with children, and you could only offer your hand on his shoulder, a promise. “Go back, I promise to stay here if anything further happens. But you shold give them another chance dont you think?”

And so he’d sprint back to his hometown, and you wouldnt hear from him again till he ran up right up to you a few days later. Begging you to play a game with him. The normal you supposed, and with a grin that seemed to stretch wider with every day, you told him the same thing you told him every single time.

“You cant move?!” Scaramouche nearly yelled one time, tiny fists curling at his side. “Thats… thats stupid!”

“It is isnt it?” You only smiled in response.

Unsatisfied with your response, he clawed your arm, pulling you with all his might. Strong, you realized with surprise that he was much stronger than most children his age. Easy enough to tug away from, but strong enough to take you off guard.

Snapping your hand back to your side, you narrowed your eyes. You weren't angry… no, you hadnt felt strong feelings like that after the disappearance of the Kitsune Saiguu. “Do not attempt to move me,” was your curt response, said in the most stern voice you’d used with the boy.

He’d looked at you only a few seconds longer before bursting into tears, turning away and running. You didn't feel regretful for defending yourself, only turning once more with a tired sigh to stare at the distance.

But just as you stayed ageless, Scaramouche grew older. Still, crossing each others pass was inevitable when you sat in the plains, just alongside the path that lead to his hometown.

With a permanent scowl that seemed to stain his face, he still seemed to have mature a tad bit. Maybe hadnt improved in the social department, because he now scared children and adults and alike, but more mature…

“Hm? Whats this?”

Once again, sitting criss cross under the large tree that provided the perfect shade on sunny days, you stared at the boy expectantly. His hands hesitated at your question, but he resumed shuffling. “Cards,” he simply said in response.

A small featherlike feeling flitted across your chest, making you feel lighter and… almost ticklish. A small smile crossed your face, and you recognized the emotion to be one of adoration. For him to have remembered words you’d spoken years ago, it gave you a warmth you’d sorely missed. A warmth akin to watching him and the other children grow up.

“Ew, dont smile like that, its creepy.”

Swatting at his head, he frowned further when you laughed. “You’re more mature,” you pointed out, lazily leaning back. “You need to work on your people skills though, as someone who hasnt moved in years, thats pitiful that I know more than you.”

“Shut it!”

But as he grew up, you hardly got to see much of him. He’d reached your height and then fully disappeared, leaving no goodbye. And much as you hated to admit it, you hardly noticed, not when days passed in a flurry. You were used to being by yourself, entertaining the kids and greeting the people that passed by.

Sometimes, there’d be the reminder of the warmth he’d given you. But it was quickly overshadowed by your duty to remain seated in wait for the Kitsune Saiguu. A dedication kept in its earnest, but beginning to dwindle.

Inazuma was beginning to change.

“The vision decree…” you repeated, staring at the traveller who’d mentioned it to you. “Care to elaborate?”

The new archon threatenening to take away visions from every inhabitant of Inazuma. It was preposterous, so much that you didnt move. Your vision meant the world to you, but so did the Kitsune Saiguu. You werent sure just how you weighed the two till you saw civilians passing by you, ones you recognized, ones that didnt recognize themselves.

It was snowing, cold snowflakes melting into your skin while your hair soaked in the water. Unflinching, you hummed to a little tune, awaiting someone to pass you so that you could attempt to strike a conversation of somesort. The unnatural weather distanced all who entered the field though, and you simply waited. For the Kitsune Saiguu, for someone, or for some form of entertainment, you didnt know. You Slowly closing your eyes, you decided not to care.

“Im gone for five years and you’re still sitting here like a dumbass.”

Eyes snapping open, you find yourself face to face with a complete stranger. Dark purple hair with dark blue eyes, piercing and dangerous in a way you dont recognize at all. Fancy clothing that you cant identify or put a name on.

The boy took a step towards you, crouching down to stare at you directly. His eyes scanned over your figure briefly, and he brushed the snow out of your hair and ears with one flick of his hand. In the next, he was offering a coat to you. “Take it, you’re probably getting cold.”

You leaned forward, ignoring the coat he offered you. Gently, you raised your hand to brush the hair from his eyes, centred on the way his pupils widened. Offering a small moment of surprise and one glimpse into the small childlike blue eyed wonder he was. “Kiddo,” you breathed, pulling your hand back and scanning him once again. “You’ve grown.”

“And you havent.”

Snickering at his comment, you took the coat. You didnt need it, but he looked like he didnt either. He was already wearing clothing that kept him warm, and with careful observation and an untouched coat, you settled on the fact that he’d brought it here. Brought the coat here for you.

“Still havent improved with those social skills of yours have you?”

He scoffed, letting himself fall back till he was sitting fully. “I dont want to hear it from someone who refuses to move an inch for years. Lazy ass.”

You open your mouth to retort, but instead laugh at his comment, shaking your head. “Gained some humour on your journeys have you? Bad words too it seems. Anyways...” He had sat down, which meant that he meant fully well to sit, chat, and catch up. That familiar warmth filled your chest, a contrast between the cold snow. “Welcome back.”

It wasnt often that Scaramouche visited Inazuma, but when he did, he was sure to visit you. The two of you would sit down for hours, talking about the most trivial topics. He never mentioned what he did in his time away, and you never asked.

But things began to go downhill when news of the vision decree finally took action.

“Its no joke anymore! The Raiden Shogun has taken custody of almost a hundred visions!”

In that moment you made your decision, weighing your vision over the Kitsune Saiguu. Awfully selfish you knew, but you’d spent decades sitting there in wait.

And for the first time you sat up from your position on the ground, clumsily stumbling upright but gaining balance. It takes a few steps until you’re back to normal, and you begin your journey in order to escape the Raiden Shogun’s vision hunt decree.

_-_-_-_

You didnt expect to see him again.

Long grass tickled at the skin of your legs, making you adjust your footing to no avail. Sun slowly descending past the mountains to mark the start of an evening and the soon approaching night. A normal day of exploring the mountains and islands of Inazuma, observing the constant changing situation, and running away from the vision decree like a favourite past-time.

With the exception of a firm grip on your wrist.

Dark purple like hair, same hate brimmed eyes and lavish clothing. You recognized Scaramouche the moment he had appeared, looking just as surprised as you were. That being before he snatched your wrist and snarled, “You.”

You wouldve considered it pure luck to find him, an unexpected reunion with someone you actually remembered. But no, his tone had some predatorial edge to it that had you cringing. Hard. “Yes, its me.” You answered back with a frown, trying to loosen his hold. “Nice to see you too, is something the matter?”

He only seemed confused at your words, pulling you closer.

“Something the matter?” He asked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Well, to start, you’re not sitting at your damn spot.”

Taken aback for a moment, you wondered if that sole fact was what drove the boy to such lengths. Surely he couldn't be so troubled over the fact that you moved… “The vision hunt decree, I'm sure I mentioned that I was sticking around in wait for the Kitsune Saiguu. I decided to wander around and avoid the conflict until I could settle back.”

“You could’ve waited for me,” he stated almost instantly. “I could have protected you.”

You felt your brows furrow quizzically. “Wait for you? Why in the world would I-”

“Why wouldn't I?” He pushed you closer till he could fully grab both wrists, taking a step closer as if his words would resonate clearer in your head. “You took care of me as a child, it would only be fair for me to repay the favour.” But he only seemed to be looking for excuses. “And besides, you can't just up and leave… I didn't know.”

Before you could interject with the obvious answer that he didn't need to know, you stopped. You’d lived decades, nearly centuries if you’d kept count, and you had learned to read people's expressions even when you’d stayed away from them for so long. He didn't know. It hit you in the most unpleasant way that he wasn't aware that it was none of his concern. To him, you were just another thing he needed to keep track of, something he had control over. His face basically screamed, ‘I depended on you to stay in that place.’

Deep breath in and out. You’d lived long, longer than him, you could deal with a child throwing a tantrum.

“Don't worry,” you gestured to the vision ta your side. “I'm strong enough to protect myself, I appreciate your concern, but I’ll be back when the vision decree ends.”

Unconvinced, he pulled you closer, just until your faces were mere inches away from each other. “No,” he said in a stern voice. “I’d rather you by my side, where I can protect you. I hate to question what you’re capable of, but you’ve been sitting down for as long as I’ve known you for.”

“I’ve lived decades more than you,” a simple reply, hopefully enough to get by him. You snatched your hands back with ease, ears flinching slightly when a cold breeze swept past you. But you stayed firm, not wanting to look vulnerable against the imposing air he had around him.

Still unconvinced. “You’re coming with me.”

“No I’m not.”

You’d known him as a kid, watched him grow up along with all the other small ones in his hometown. And maybe you admit you cared a smudge bit about the warmth he gave you when settling down to play cards, but he was different. He had changed in the worst way and you weren't about to deal with it.

“So you’re not coming with me voluntarily?” He asked softly, taking a small step to which you responded by stepping back. He had his hands up, as if telling you he wouldn't hurt you. But the way he said voluntarily sent shivers up your spine.

“No.” Hand on your vision, you held your own hand up threateningly.

He took his time when tilting his head, taking a deep breath in, and then appearing in front of you in just a short stride. Too quick to react, you hesitated before you could attack him. You didn't want to hurt him, he was still a child in your eyes, and you paid the consequences for that. He slid his hand just along your neck, and a jolt of electricity seemed to thrum inside you just as you collapsed in his arms.

Scaramouche was quick to catch you, hoisting you up into his arms dearly. “I do hope you’ll come to understand,” he said softly, cradling your unconscious form in his arms. Making sure not to crush your tail when carrying your legs, he looked past the mountains, sigh resting on his lips.

Because Scaramouche liked to have control of the things he held dear. Like keeping all your valuables neat and tidy in a closet, he was happy knowing you were safe and stable in that spot you always sat on.

And he couldn't have you moving could he?

#genshin impact #genshin headcanons #genshin oneshot #genshin fanfic #genshin scaramouche #genshin scaramouche x reader #scaramouche x reader #genshin impact x reader #cynshealthysfw #genshin fluff

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mysticmeena · 2 years ago

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How about Platonic Yandere! Rezef and Cayena Hill with their little half sister in the og story who's plotting to escape? Have a nice day!

��ᴇᴇɴᴀ ɴᴏᴛᴇs : you have a nice day/night too, nonnie! thank you for the request! since we don't know much of the of story, i'm just gonna try to base it off from fl!cayena memories of og!cayena and the novel. and after reading the manhwa, my hatred for the emperor grew even more so let me make him more worse <3

THE BACKGROUND

❥ after the empress died, the officials attempted to convince him to take in a noble last of their suggestion as the queen that the internal affairs of the palace will be taken care of as well as the princess and the prince's wellbeing. especially with the archduke's position threatening them.

❥ though the emperor tried to fight back he was outnumbered his subjects and their logic and begrudgingly took in a high ranked noble lady as his queen, your birth mother. at least she was able to bring in her close friend, her maid. wassheyourmothersecretlover?yesshewasbecausethesepairings>>>

❥ though the palace life wasn't pretty as it was made out to be. your mother was isolated as the only interactions were the maids and servants and she had taken the reins of the internal affairs of the palace. and every month, the emperor would visit her one night. it was dull life really and they clearly weren't both happy with each other.

❥ and during those nights, you were conceived. your mother's health wasn't so good as she had dealt with poisoning attempts after the empress's death. she wanted to keep you safe so she did all she can. with her maid's help, she concealed the pregnancy successfully for six months before the emperor found out.

❥ unfortunately, the emperor thought your mother had ill intentions and decided to sentence her to death after she gave birth to you. your mother was horrified at that and began to plan an escape with her maid help. like hell, she was gonna die and not see her child grow up.

❥ three months later, the pair decided it was the perfect time to escape and manage to take care of the guards on duty. however, the emperor heard of the plan and confronted them both just as they reached the castle borders. of course, making people's lives worse was a hobby of his, he killed the queen maid lover which resulted your mother to give birth to you due to the shock.

❥ and true to his word, the emperor killed off your mother after long labors of giving birth to you. you wouldn't know till years later in the future that your mother died the day you were born because of miscommunication and misjudgment. and you loathed him even more then.

❥ to be honest, the emperor didn't care much for you. you had inherited the eyes of your father and the hair of your mother but that day, the emperor made a decree that although you may be a legitimate heir, you won't be able to have the rights to succeed to the throne. but at least he made sure you had your title as a second princess and its benefits.

❥ growing up in the castle was lonely. the dull and obedient maids and servants, the harsh tutors, and cold instructors to make sure you were perfect, and don't forget the nobles you get to meet once in a while. they smile and throw some compliments but you knew they laughed and schemed behind your back. and it was lonely with no one to actually connect yourself too.

❥ until you met your half-siblings. you were warned to stay away from them but it wasn't like you intentionally tried to meet them. the sounds of kids laughing and clothes rustling were something you already were drawn to. and as you shyly peeked from behind the tree, you noticed two blonde children playing. they both seem a couple of years older than you.

❥ it was rezef who noticed you first and cayena who called out to you afterward to join them. and so you did, curious about the game they were playing. after explaining you and running around, cayena demanded that all of you should sit down since she wanted to teach you something. and that day you learn how to make flower crowns with your sister and brother.

❥ and you three always met at the same time every day, save for the rainy or cold days. slowly days turns weeks, weeks into months, and months to years. you learned so much about them and so did they. bonding over how bad the emperor was and losing the people they love. eventually, the day you turned ten, you 'officially' met your siblings properly. and you were so happy you could meet them openly now. they were first people you could actually connect to you.

❥ cayena and rezef, on the other hand, were obsessed with you. even during the first few meetings, they knew you were the link to connect them all. like the missing puzzle piece that slotted between them perfectly. you were exactly what they needed. and don't ever think they'll let go of you.

❥ your older sister, cayena, spoils you lavishly with glamorous jewels, pretty shoes, extravagant dresses, and only the best for her little sister. as much as she wants to show you off to the empire, she's afraid something or someone would attempt to steal you away. hence, she dresses up more and advises you to dress modestly whenever you were at a party or an outing. she wants to keep these beautiful sights all to herself. why should some insignificant person dare to see her sister at her peak?

❥ your older brother, rezef, adores being affectionate with you privately and publicly. a hand holding on to yours, an arm wrapped around your arm, a short but sweet hug shared before you or him leave the other. unlike cayena, he wants the world to see that you are his beloved younger sister, and how he treasures you so. but it was also because he was barely raised with any affection other than his sisters showing it to him. a reminder that he isn't alone in the castle.

❥ oh and those who mocks up openly or behind your back. pfft, your big siblings took care of that already. cayena can destroy anyone social reputation and image with just a few rumors spread her and there so they may be shunned in society. and your brother always has his shadows knights to take care of garbage properly after cayena finishes them.

❥ these siblings are absolutely obsessive and possessive with you. you have to do as they say and follow them as a good little sister should. make one wrong move, it will affect the people's lives around you. as much as rezef wanted to isolate you, your older sister gently explained how much easier it would be the control you when innocent people are around. and it was easier to control you subtly.

❥ remember how obsessed cayena was with raphael and rezef with olivia? it's still there but it's not quite strong as it was since it's directed to you now. and by this time, you would notice how...unhealthy their relationship is with you. and you had to act fast. successfully getting the duke and lady olivia's help as you explained your current situation, you were able to plan a escape.

❥ however, you forget one small detail. everyone in your palace and around you served for rezef and cayena. how could you hide such a massive detail from these workers? and on the day you plan to leave, you woke up to rezef and cayena in your special cell. time time, their expressions were cold and indifferent which slightly scared you.

❥ rezef went on and on about how ungrateful you were being, that he should expect better from you since you should've learned your lesson the last time, and to you should be thankful that they were protecting you like this. he was able to make you feel so guilty that you couldn't help but let out some tears, though some in anger than sadness. all while cayena held but it wasn't the warm embrace she would give like before but a embrace that you cannot find a way to free yourself.

❥ and you didn't ruin just this for yourself. but for the others around you. the maids and knights all either killed or never to find work again, especially those with families. but it wasn't just them. because the duke and the lady were roped into this, they weren't punished with their title being stripped or death. lady olivia was to become the next empress after rezef killed your father and raphael become the unwilling husband of cayena.

❥ and it was the hopelessness that you felt as rezef forbid you from leaving the palace walls with amped up security. the only time you would see your sister, the duchess now, was when she decided to meet you which was often. you weren't even allowed to go to parties anymore, as you were stuck in the palace. the only interactions you had was with cayena and rezef. and no matter what you did, you always had someone's life ruined one way or another.

#the villainess is a marionette #yandere the villainess is a marionette #yandere rezef hill x reader #yandere cayena hill x reader #platonic yandere #yandere cayena hill #yandere rezef hill #— meena writes

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buckyownsmylife · 4 years ago

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Follow you - Chris Evans smut

The one where Chris becomes your roomate and finds out he has a domesticity kink... and more

Warnings: Smut, breeding kink, domesticity kink, friends to lovers, rommates au, pandemic mention, hair-pulling kink, daddy kink, cockwarming, kind of allusion to an age gap, but can be read as reader being into teasing chris

Word count: 4.1k

A/N: Thanks to @mollygetssherlockcoffee for reading this over and helping me make it better! You’re the sweetest person ever! this is for my own birthday celebration challenge! Like I explained here, I’m going to try to fill every single AU I listed with the characters I picked for the challenge, and since the deadline if May 27, these fics will be posted randomly, as I finish them. Hope you guys like it!

Chris’ P.O.V.

“C’mon, sweetheart,” I’d been trying to convince her to close her laptop for the last two hours, unfortunately without any luck. She just glanced at me before returning to her document, and I groaned as I left the living room in search of what I knew we needed.

“Close the laptop and I’ll give you a sip.” This time when she looked up, she found me holding a bottle of my most expensive whiskey, the one she’d been dying to try ever since she first got invited to my place.

It was a tense moment of evaluation while she took in my offer and her workload, her head turning from her computer to me and then back to the device again, and I found himself growing anxious because of how desperately I wanted her company that night.

“Please?” I tried to convince her, even going so far as to pout - which at least earned me a giggle. I considered it a win, especially with the way it made my chest warm up. “C’mon, we deserve it! After the week we had?”

She frowned when she thought back on the stresses we had confided in each other for the last couple of days, and I watched with glee when she slowly closed her laptop, prompting me to wave my arms around in victory. “We?” She teased, getting up to stand before me with her arms crossed in front of her body, making me laugh.

“Alright, so maybe just you.” I couldn’t really deny that my work “problems” paled in comparison to hers. “Listen, I’m only trying to help.” She narrowed her eyes at me, reaching out for the bottle and unscrewing it before taking the sip I’d promised.

“Shit, this really is good.” A smug smile took over my face as I wrapped my arms around her, walking us back to the couch before making us fall over it.

“Only the best for you, babe.” I watched her roll her eyes at the pet name, snickering at how it affected her. I knew it made her giddy and she hated it, it’s why I insisted on doing it - or so I told myself.

Something deep inside of me whispered differently, though. I tried to ignore it. She was my best friend and we were going to be living together for the foreseeable future. No one knew when this pandemic would let up.

And lord knows that nothing positive had ever come out of my investments in romantic relationships. So every rational thought in my mind was begging me not to overcomplicate this. I couldn’t stand to lose her friendship, anyway. That’s why I had invited her to spend lockdown with me - my need to know she was okay, and be able to have her around whenever I needed to vent.

She was the only one outside my family who got my anxiety well enough to help me work through it when I was feeling bad, and she had even been able to prevent me from having panic attacks more than once.

I just couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone other than her. I simply hadn’t anticipated how fucking horny this period of forced sexual privation would make me, and I never expected her to become a willing victim to my needs.

But boy, once the liquor hit and she ended up over my lap, shivering as she rode my thigh without a care in the world, was I glad that she did.

“Is this what you like?” I asked, looking up at her with my mouth hanging open, unbelieving of how fucking sexy she looked as she used my body for her pleasure. I didn’t even care that my cock was straining against my jeans, begging me to move her on top of it. As long as I could keep enjoying the show, being a part of it, I was satisfied.

“I wanna learn it,” I pressed, moving my hands to hold her ass, squeezing it the way I’d always wanted to do but never allowed myself to dream about. “I wanna learn how to please you.” She made me feel something I hadn’t felt before, in any of my past relationships. There was attraction, of course, but there was also this deep, familiar feeling that made me feel at home. It made me feel safe, and with the help of alcohol, I was desperate to explore it.

“Ugh,” she groaned, letting her head fall back, drawing my attention to her breasts, the way they bounced in front of my eyes, unfortunately still covered. My mouth watered at the sight of it, wanting nothing much than to strip her bare and wrap my lips around one of her nipples.

“Don’t say stuff like that, Evans.” The comment threw me off, making me frown as I took a hold of the hair on the back of her head and yanked her to me, devouring her lips. They were soft - so much softer than I’d ever allowed myself to imagine.

“Why not?” I panted against her mouth once I was forced to separate from her taste of whiskey to search for some oxygen. She kept moving, her eyes hazy and glossed over, and it sent a pang of lust straight down my body when I realized it wasn’t completely due to the drinks we shared. There was also desire in there.

“You want to learn?” She asked, hands bunching up my shirt as she used her hold to grind against me faster. “Then fuck me, Chris.” She molded her body to mine, engulfing my lips once more as I laid her down on the couch, excited to have her underneath me - excited to see her naked body, explore it, get to know every little thing that made her tick.

I knew it would be a moment I’d forever remember, regardless of the amount of bourbon in my blood. I just never expected it to become something I was so eager to relive over and over and over again.

It was supposed to be a one time thing. When I woke up in the morning, I was ready to go back to being roommates. We were good at that. She was a morning person, by the time I woke up every morning, she already had breakfast ready for me, and then we’d go out to the backyard to let Dodger out together.

We’d sit and talk and then I’d go for a run - she’d have done her yoga already, while I was still asleep - I’d answer some e-mails, she’d work on her laptop by my side and the silence was just as comfortable as all of our late night conversations.

She’d sneak out to the kitchen and come back with a few sandwiches for our lunch, and then the rest of the day would go by with us doing whatever mundane task we had in mind, together even if we were doing separate things, and I didn’t feel suffocated.

I didn’t even run out of things to say. By the time dinner rolled around and I followed her back to the kitchen, cleaning up the dishes while she fixed us dinner - I wasn’t allowed to cook in my own stove, mostly because she was terrified of my food but hid it under the excuse of that one time when I started a fire - then we’d eat together, watch a movie together, talk until we fell asleep - always together.

I was shocked. It’d never been this way in any of my previous relationships. In fact, I was certain it was the reason why they had never worked. I’d given up on any realistic expectation of settling down precisely because of this: I just never expected to find anyone with whom a day-to-day life wouldn’t eventually grow boring.

It’d been three months and I still loved to wake up to her coffee. We still fell asleep every night side by side, too tired to move into different beds because we had laughed our asses off after skyping Scott.

And now that sex came into play in our relationship? I just knew there was no way I’d ever go back to being nothing but friends - or living in a place where she wasn’t the first person I saw when I woke up.

It sucked that it took a pandemic and a night of alcohol to make me realize that, but damn, was I grateful that I decided to open a bottle of whiskey that evening.

I kept waiting for the catch, the moment it would all go to shit, but it never came. Our lives resumed to how they used to be, only now I had this ongoing inner battle to not just bend her over the nearest piece of furniture when we were busy, and the ability to do exactly that whenever there was nothing else to do.

And for a while it was bliss. There wasn’t a nagging voice inside my head questioning this arrangement because it was theoretically perfect. I had a best friend, a roommate and a fuck buddy, all wrapped into one single person that I adored.

Life couldn’t possibly get better - until I realized that I wanted more. Talks of lockdown being over started and she had plans of going back to her place, of course, but I couldn’t stand the thought of being away from her.

I wanted to see my family too, but I wanted to take her with me. Introduce her to my mom, see her get along with my sisters. Witness how she’d be with my nephews and nieces - I knew how much she loved kids. And that’s when it hit me.

I’d given my heart to her. Somewhere between the morning coffees and afternoon runs, the nights where I’d rant about all of my silly problems and she actually listened to them - really listened, never making me feel bad about what could only be described as rich people problems.

All the innocent little gestures, and the not so innocent ones - when I discovered she was exactly the nasty slut I’d always dreamed of, the way she would randomly drop to her knees and suck me off, even while I was on the phone. Most times she didn’t even let me repay the favor. She just genuinely liked to blow me.

She also liked to play with me randomly, like when we were watching a movie and she mindlessly reached for my crotch, rubbing me until I got hard. It almost always ended in sex, and I just loved it.

I loved it, and I loved her, and the idea of her ever sharing this idyllic lifestyle with anyone else made me irrationally jealous.

And that’s how I knew it. I didn’t want to mess it up. But how could I not fuck this up?

Xxx

“Chris…” Her sweet voice called out to me, reaching my ears while I was hiding in my office, trying to get my thoughts in order so I wouldn’t just randomly blurt out what I was feeling for my best friend to my best friend.

To her credit, she didn’t try to force me to keep her company - but that only made me fall even deeper for her, leaving me a complete and utter mess while she went about her day as if nothing was wrong in the world.

“Yes?” I looked up to see her by the threshold, clearly reticent about invading my privacy. It made me smile, thinking back on all of the times my exes hadn’t been as understanding, even after I let them clearly know what I was needing.

“I made cupcakes, do you want me to bring you one?” The thought of her in the kitchen, baking a sweet treat just for me had my cock twitching in my pants. Biting my lips, I pushed away from my desk to finally get up and stretch my legs, taking advantage of the monitor to hide my hard-on.

“No, I’ll come eat them downstairs with you.” She smiled before leaving, and I soon trailed after her, walking into the kitchen to find the most delicious-looking little treats, just waiting to be devoured.

Much like her, I supposed.

I was reaching for one of them, already licking my lips in anticipation when something caught my eye, prompting me to raise my gaze and look at her again, but really look at her this time.

She was wearing an apron.

There was nothing inherently sexual about the damn thing, but the way she looked with it, going about her business in my kitchen like she owned the place… It just felt right, seeing her there.

And suddenly I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Y/N…” I started, leaving the cupcake back on the counter and brushing off the crumbs as I circled the kitchen island to go stand in front of her. She hummed before turning to meet me, smiling slightly to signal that she was listening to what I had to say.

But I didn’t know how to say it. So we just stood there, staring at each other until eventually her smile became a frown. “Chris, what’s going on?” I still couldn’t speak. Much to my absolute surprise though, she just sighed, wiping her hands on the apron while shaking her head, a knowing smile on her face.

“You’re stressed, aren’t you? You’ve been working so much, that’s why I thought the cupcakes would be a good idea,” she explained nodding towards the tray where her sweet treats laid. “They’re a reward and a break all wrapped in one delicious cake.”

The comment was like a punch to the stomach - or a scalding wave of desire rushing through my body, straight to my groin. The idea of her thinking about my needs and catering (quite literally) to them just did something to me, and I didn’t know how to explain it - I don’t think I understood it myself.

“But since they didn’t work…” she continued, blissfully unaware of the conundrum she had put me into. “I know something else that will definitely work.” And just like that, the woman dropped to her knees in front of me, reaching for my sweatpants before I could find a way to close the mouth that was hanging open.

“I guess I’ll grab a sweet treat for myself.” She looked so devious, small hand encircling my already pathetically engorged member, that all I could do was whisper an, “Oh, shit,” when she immediately wrapped her lips around it, starting to suck me off without any preamble.

My fingers were white as I held onto the counter behind me to keep myself up. She looked so good, staring up at me with her lips wrapped around my dick, I felt like I was about to blow already.

Why did she have to be such a fucking tease?

“Oh, God,” I moaned when she managed to engulf the entirety of my member inside her throat, the choking noises getting to my head. My hand instinctively laced with her hair, first to hold her lips close to my navel, then to pry her completely off of my member.

“What’s wrong?” She questioned once she was able to speak, surprise written all over her features while I was still staring down at her slightly teary face and trying to find my voice.

“I-I have a problem.” There. I said it. I had finally made some progress in my goal to let her know what was going through my head. Only instead of curiosity, what I got was a confused expression from the woman still holding my dick, her eyes darting from my own to the member throbbing between her fingers.

“No, you don’t!” It would have been funny if I wasn’t so fucking frustrated. Yanking her by the hair, I complained, “Not that kind of problem!” pulling her to the living room so I could throw her on the couch, trying to ignore her moans of pleasure in the process.

I’d figured out pretty early on that she had a pretty serious hair-pulling kink, and if my plans of sitting down and having a level-headed conversation were ever in motion, they surely went out of the window the second she pulled my body down to cover hers and adjusted my cock so it would easily fill her.

“Son of a…” I groaned, letting my head fall down against her chest as the little vixen gleefully giggled underneath me, legs wrapped around my torso as she tried to thrust up and tempt me to move.

“Just wait a second,” I managed to reason, but she just shook her head.

“Fuck away your problem, Chris. Use me. I want you to.” Motherfucker. I really couldn’t catch a break with her. Just as she started to make me move again, my hand instinctively wrapped around her neck, lightly squeezing it just enough to get her to shut up.

“I wanna start a family with you,” I finally spilled, looking deep into her eyes as I tried to ignore that I was still balls deep inside of her. Her eyes widened, and now her mouth was the one hanging open.

I couldn’t really relish in it because she looked absolutely delicious and she felt stupidly heavenly to my throbbing dick.

A few seconds went by without as much of a reaction from her and I was about to pull out - despite still being achingly hard - but her legs held me tighter, stopping my plans of leaving her tight haven.

“You know…” She started to speak, a little out of breath, catching my attention as I finally gathered the courage to look her in the eye again. “When I first met you, I thought you were the epitome of a fuckboy.”

The unexpected sentence had me snorting, and then I just couldn’t stop laughing. Finally pulling away from her, she fixed her hair when she sat up and I did the same, shaking my head slightly as I rubbed my eyes.

Our own relative nakedness - well… mine, she was wearing her usual dress with no underwear under the damn apron - didn’t affect anything when I pondered over her words, until I decided to break the silence.

“I mean… I think I was?” She chewed on her bottom lip as she took in my response, analyzing it, weighing its validity in that gorgeous head of hers. I was nervous, but she hadn’t blew me off yet. And quite honestly? I’d do anything for that little hope that was growing inside of me.

“What changed?” Was her question, so unexpected I couldn’t help but question, “Huh?”

“What made you change?” It wasn’t an unwelcome inquiry, especially when the response became clear to me, lighting up my brain and warming my chest, spreading all over my body until I had no choice but to voice it.

“I realized I could have a future with you.” My smile was vulnerable but honest, and in her eyes, I could see that she knew that. When she threw one leg over my lap, straddling my hips, I allowed myself to breathe deeply again, leaning on the soft cushion while taking a hold of her ass.

“So, how are we gonna do this?” She non-nonchalantly asked, slowly rubbing herself against my still half-hard member. I groaned when I realized the implication of her words, knowing that the meaning paired with the feeling of her wet lips dragging along my cock would get it back up in no time at all. “You wanna do me right now?”

The brashness of the question made my eyes light up, as weird as it may sound. In that moment, it became clear just how perfect for me she really was, giving me what I needed exactly in the way I didn’t know how to ask for it.

“See? This is why I’m in love with you.” She rolled her eyes at that, making me laugh. I’d anticipated the gesture, I knew it’d take her longer to say it, but it was alright. The fact that she was willing me to give me a child was more than enough proof of her feelings for me, if her entire behavior ever since she moved in wasn’t already.

“Shut up and fuck me, Evans.” Throwing her back against the couch, she yelped in surprise when I took off my shirt and slapped the inside of her thigh, assuming my usual position of hovering over her smaller frame.

“Spread your fucking legs, darling. I’m gonna fuck you real good.” The way she bit her lip as I slowly penetrated her again showed me just how excited the prospect got her, and as I started to make good on my promise, her moans told me just as much.

“Holy fuck,” she commented as I pounded her ruthlessly, weeks of frustration and the rush of anticipation getting the best of me, and I was glad for the feeling of her nails biting into my skin because otherwise, I’d probably run over the edge of not even caring about her own pleasure as I chased mine.

“You gonna cum inside of me, honey? Make me a mom? Finally fulfill your dream of becoming a daddy?” Her words detracted me from my task of sucking bruises on the skin that was now mine to bruise, mine. I threw my head back, yelling a, “fuck yes,” as my hips sped up, desperate to fill her up, but I was determined to get her to cum before me.

“Say it,” she ordered, small hand circling my throat as best as she could, a throwback to what I’d done only moments prior. It wasn’t enough to choke me, but it did catch my attention. “I wanna hear you say it.”

Tears escaped the corners of my eyes as I blinked, the intensity of the moment overwhelming in the best of ways. “God, you are such a fucking tease…” She chuckled underneath me, giving my throat a squeeze before she raised up on her elbows to kiss my jaw.

“Better get used to it… daddy.” And just like that, I realized that I had yet another kink I hadn’t known about before her. Or maybe it was just her, and I was obsessed with the damn woman, painfully turned on by every little thing that she did.

“I’m gonna cum deep inside your little pussy, sweetheart,” I finally gathered myself enough to do as she asked me to. “You’re gonna belong to me forever now. Give me kids, make me happy. How do you like that?”

The mischievous grin she gave me told me everything. “I love it.” I knew this was her way of saying what she couldn’t yet voice, and I’d take it. I’d take anything she gave me, any chance I got to love this wonderful woman.

We came together, both riding our highs in deep ecstasy. I moaned when I felt myself empty all of my seed inside of her, incredibly excited about the prospect of starting our future together right then.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” I cradled her face in my hands as I struggled to catch my breath, but she turned it to the side and pressed a kiss to my palm and I was breathless all over again. It was such a simple action, why did it get to me so much?

“You’re not too bad yourself, Chris.” I didn’t want to part with her warmth, so I just adjusted us on the sofa in a way that kept me inside of her, sighing contently as I realized I’d never have to sleep away from her again.

“I’m gonna stay right here all night.” I adjusted myself so I was resting my face on her boobs, perfectly happy to do just so, but by the tone of her voice, I knew she had a teasing smile when she called me an, “Old man.”

“And here I was, thinking you’d be able to go again.” Warmth filled my chest at the realization of just how badly she wanted me - just as much as I wanted her too. I was so damn ecstatic. Not even her pokes at my age would be able to affect me.

“Oh, darling… better get ready,” I warned as I adjusted myself to hover over her again, taking notice of the excited glint in her eyes, the way she bit her lip as she stared back at me. “I’m never gonna get enough of you.”

The next morning, I added a new kink to the list of random bits of information that were driving me slowly insane as I felt the overwhelming need to bend the woman that I now got to call ‘mine’ over the nearest piece of furniture and rail her until I had cummed deep inside her pussy: seeing her in my shirt while cooking breakfast.

Yeah, I was going to live a happy life by her side.

#my 2k challenge #chris evans smut #my fics #chris evans #smut #roommates au #friends to lovers #chris evans x reader #chris evans reader #chris evans reader insert #chris evans reader inserts #RPF #chris evans fanfiction

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