#walks over to my bed and trips on the way falling asleep on the floor

[jlheon]

𝓢𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐓 ୨୧ 𝐏𝐒𝐇

(𝓹airing) ── psh x fmr ꣑୧ 𝓬lassmates to lovers ; fluff, kissing, & nonsexual shower 𝔀ordcount ( 1600 ) 𝓹eng's note. my kiss scenes suck! they move too fast i reckon! 𝓫ookshelf

𝓼ynopsis. while patroling at night on a class field trip, you catch sunghoon swimming fully clothed past curfew

unlike the rest of your peers, you hate going on school trips, especially overnight ones.

it was tiring to patrol the hotel late at night when everyone was supposed to be in their rooms at curfew. you were exhausted from being in charge of making sure everyone had a room once arriving.

and now you had to do one extra lap around the whole building before you could knock out on your bed.

but that was just your job as class president, you loved it, but you must admit sometimes you wish your vice president was given some of your tasks.

luckily for you, as you finished your lap around the floor everyone was staying, nothing seemed out of place.

you sighed in relief as you unlocked your room with your keycard, about to fall asleep in the same clothes you arrived in due to so much fatigue until you heard a huge splash coming from your balcony.

you groan as you walk up to the curtain and push them aside, only to reveal park sunghoon fully clothed swimming around the pool.

angry and tired, you quickly slide open the glass door leading to your balcony and lean over the railing to shout. “sunghoon! get inside! curfew was an hour ago!”

the boy looks up at you on your balcony and smirks, getting further into the deep end.

he goes below the water's surface and when he emerges his hair is dripping wet. shaking the wet strands out of his face. his white shirt sticking to his skin, giving you a glimpse at his toned chest.

“park sunghoon i will come down there and drag you out myself,” you huff, glaring at him.

“i’ll be waiting,” he teases, diving back under the water.

you aggressively shut the glass door and slip your slippers back on. sprinting towards the elevator and getting down the ground level, not wanting to waste any more time that could be used for sleeping.

when you enter the lobby it’s not empty, families and couples still wandering about, but thankfully none of your classmates were up but sunghoon whom you knew of.

“how long is the pool open for?” you ask the front desk.

“for another hour,” the woman behind the desk tells you, “do you need any towels?”

“one please,” you say, watching park sunghoon swimming around from the window.

you make your way out to the pool deck after thanking the woman, pushing the door open to see his head bob up from the water to stare at you.

“i brought you a towel,” you inch closer to the pool, “go to your room.”

“that’s sweet of you ms. president,” sunghoon coos, “but i’m not done swimming yet.”

“seriously, go to bed,” you pinch the bridge of your nose in annoyance.

“the pool doesn’t close for another hour,” he reminds you, “if you join me i’ll go inside.”

“it’s cold and it’s late,” you cross your arms.

“i guess i’m not going inside then,” he shrugs, getting ready to dive under the water again.

you groan in defeat, setting the towel on the closest pool chair and slipping off your slippers. walking towards the pool stairs and dipping your toes in. cursing at the temperature, you walk a couple of steps down just so the water touches below your shorts.

“are you happy now,” you roll your eyes as his drenched figure approaches you.

“come deeper,” sunghoon extends his hand.

you reluctantly place your hand in his and let him pull you deeper into the pool. the water seeping through your thin shirt and shorts.

sunghoon notices you shivering and pulls you closer by your waist.

“can we go now?” you say quietly, placing your hands on his chest.

“you just got in,” he fakes a pout, tightening his grip on your waist so you can't retreat now.

if someone told you this morning that you would be waist-deep in the hotel pool at eleven at night hugging park sunghoon, you would have punched them in the face.

your head leaning on his shoulder as you stand in the middle of the water.

you’ve never been this close to sunghoon, though you’ve talked to him many times. he was your deskmate in freshman year in biology and you two had gotten considerably close.

though that faded when you had no classes together in sophomore and now junior year, but it’s not like you two were strangers.

but you would never expect to be practically molded to him instead of getting the well-needed rest required for the activities you and the council had planned tomorrow.

sunghoon notices the chattering of your teeth as you cling to him in search of any heat. your lips quivering as you hug him close.

“you still cold?” he softly asks, his wet hand running through your hair.

“mhm,” you hum, staring at the blue water surrounding you two.

“want me to warm you up?” sunghoon says teasingly, lifting your chin with the tip of his finger.

you tilt your head at him in confusion before he leans down and presses his lips on your cold ones.

the kiss is slow yet deep as he places a hand on your neck to tilt you at just the right angle. your hands find his nape and thread your fingers through the wet hair.

you break away to catch your breath and collect your thoughts when sunghoon gives you no time to recover.

his lips smashing against yours once again in a more passionate kiss. filled with desire as he gently nibbles on your bottom lip, silently begging for entrance.

you obliged, parting your lips so his tongue could slip inside. exploring your mouth as you stand there unmoving.

when sunghoon finally breaks free for air your cheeks are flushed and you are embarrassed by your lack of kissing experience.

“that was my first kiss,” you blurt out as sunghoon’s chest heaved up and down.

“what?” sunghoon says a little stunned, not that he’s complaining, he’s glad to be your first kiss. but how has nobody ever kissed you before?

“yeah,” you uncomfortably giggle, “sorry if i was bad or anything, you were good though!”

“you were good,” sunghoon pats your head, pecking your cheek.

you bury your head in sunghoon’s neck as your cheeks continue to heat up. he can’t help but smile to himself at your adorable antics.

a minute later one of the hotel staff walks out to inform you two that the pool is now closed. sunghoon splashes you as you run away from him to exit the pool. wrapping yourself in the towel you had brought.

“i only brought one towel.”

sunghoon chuckles before unwrapping the fabric from around you and fixing it to cover both of your cold bodies.

you both rush into the elevator, pressing the button to your floor. sunghoon walks you to your room before kissing you goodnight.

though minutes later when you’re sat on your floor trying to process whatever just happened, there’s a knock at your door.

sunghoon is back with his phone and a change of clothes, still dripping onto your carpet.

“sunghoon?” you look at him confused.

“thought we could spend some more time together.”

you find yourself under the warm shower head with sunghoon behind you, gently shampooing your hair.

your drenched clothes are now laid on your balcony to dry.

the warm water hits your back as you wash his hair. steam engulfs the whole bathroom, fogging up the glass door, and the mirror.

the body wash you both lather on diminishing the scent of chlorine that followed you from the pool now replaced with strawberry and coconut.

it’s weird to think you and sunghoon are in such an intimate position after not talking for nearly a year and a half but it feels right.

the way he kisses you between rinsing his body makes an uncontrollable amount of butterflies erupt in your stomach.

you both get out of the shower, sunghoon shaking his hair like a wet dog, droplets of water hitting your face.

sunghoon gets changed into the clothes he brought from his room while you find something to wear in your suitcase.

he brushed your hair and blow-dried it for you as you did your skincare in the bathroom mirror. you spin around to apply some of your moisturizer to his pretty face.

you both finally crash onto your bed at a quarter to one in the morning. a time not ideal for your set alarm of six that will go off in a mere five hours. but that doesn’t seem to matter to you when you have your head rested on park sunghoon’s chest as his arms are around you, lips brushing against yours in one final kiss before the both of you fall into a deep sleep.

in the morning you realize you’ve hit snooze too many times when there's a loud pattern of knocks on your door. startling both you and sunghoon.

you instruct sunghoon to stay in bed while you answer the door.

your annoyed vice president is the one outside your door, storming past you and into your room only to notice sunghoon asleep on your bed.

“you spent the night with sunghoon?” jungwon gasps.

“shut up!” you shove him, “he’s still sleeping!”

“well, you need to get him back to his room before we head out to the city,” jungwon argues.

“oh my god! can you just cover for me for once?” you plead with the underclassmen, “just give me like an extra hour of sleep and we’ll meet you there!”

“fine, but if mrs. kim catches sunghoon in your room it’s all on you,” jungwon sighs, exiting your hotel room.

you let out a breath of relief as you climb back into bed with sunghoon. setting another alarm before slipping under the duvet and back into his strong arms.

you pray that nobody notices the two of you showing up late to the café for breakfast at the same time, with park sunghoon smelling like your signature scent of strawberries and coconut.

[wintfleur]

thinking about Daryl Dixon dating a book worm girly . . . they would meet on the Greene farm. She was a good friend of Hershel’s son Shawn, and stayed and lived with the family when the outbreak started. She would spend most of her time with Hershel and Beth or with her face in a book . . . she would like to be alone a lot, having her own spot on the farm away from the house where she could peacefully read and not have to worry about interacting with anyone, a spot that used to be her and Shawn’s . . . also a spot where Daryl decides to set up his own small camp away from everyone . . . well everyone but her. He would be hesitant at first to approach her when he gets back from another search for Sofia, seeing her leaning up against a tree with a thick book in her lap. He’d seen her around a few times in the short amount of time he’s been at the farm, only with Beth or Hershel. He’d ask her what she wants, assuming that she was waiting for him. She’d apologize, saying that she just wanted to be away from everyone, and surprising the both of them he said with a grunt she could stay as long as she didn’t touch his shit or start reading aloud. And for the first time he sees a small smile on her lips . . . but it was quickly covered when she lifted her book up from her lap.

Time-skip to after the farm falls and before they find the prison. They would become closer . . . well as close as two antisocial and closed off people could get. It was more like they found comfort in each other’s silent presence. She was so good at being quiet and finding her way around in the woods that she would often join daryl tracking/hunting. The first time daryl sees her smile since the farm is when he gives her a book he found in the trunk of an abandoned car. Since she couldn’t carry a bunch of books since they were traveling, every time she was done with a book he’d try and search for another to switch it with . . . would let her quietly mumble about the book she was reading when she couldn’t sleep and he was on watch. Would walk next to her as she walks n reads, making sure she wouldn’t trip.

When they make it to the prison, he’d bring her back multiple books whenever he goes out looking for supplies, and over time the small desk she had in her cell was cluttered with books . . . all from daryl. He would let her ramble about her books whenever they were on watch in the watch tower, him standing up and looking out while she comfortably sat on the floor with her book. He’d realize his feelings for her at the strange and unfamiliar feeling he felt in his chest as he watched her read a book to Carl and Beth who was holding Judith.

Time-skip to when they are now together, he would come back late from his shift at the look out tower in the prison and would check on her in there cell, expecting to see her sleeping since it was late . . . Instead she was curled up in her bed, technically now there bed, reading with a lit candle next to her. Not wanting to sleep without him by her side . . . and wanting to also finish another chapter. Whenever daryl would wake up from a nightmare she would quietly read to him, taking him out of his tortured mind and into the lovely world of her book. Whenever she was too focused on a book he’d surprise her with a kiss on her cheek or lips . . . completely stealing her attention. All she would have to do is bat her eyelashes and say please and daryl would fold . . . reading to her when she’s to tired to read herself, she feels so safe and warm when she’s in his arms as she listens to him read to her . . . he always kisses her forehead when he notices she fell asleep, tucking her bookmark a few pages back, knowing that she probably wouldn’t remember the last few pages he read to her.

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( take this as my application to write for twd !!! I wrote this in 20 minutes at 1am, soo it’s probably not the best I just couldn’t sleep without getting this written down. Please let me know if I should continue writing for twd . . . I’m currently rewatching the show and my love for daryl just grows stronger !!! Again please let me know what you guys think, don’t be a silent reader <333 )

main masterlist twd masterlist

[kitashousewife]

“yes, rintaro?”

“hi-jesus, a warning next time would be nice,”

“you called me,” you huff, picking at the now dried mask on your face in the small reflection of the facetime. “what do you want, rin?”

suna is outside, walking rather quickly as the background is blurred around him. he lets out an airy laugh before looking at the screen.

“i’m drunk;” he smirks, continuing to walk but tripping a little, shaking the camera. you raise your eyebrows at him to continue. he sniffs. “and i’m coming over.”

“is your house broken or something?”

he giggles, then shakes his head. “nah, yours is closer though.”

you sigh and accept defeat. you knew your best friend was in the neighborhood from his social media posts, so it’s no surprise he’s deciding to drop in. it’s late though, well past midnight. you shuffle into your bathroom to rinse off the mask, setting your phone on the counter.

“when will you be here?”

he clears his throat and swallows. “i’m walking up the stairs, so 2 min-fuck-minutes,” he trips up the steps and groans.

“what? okay give me a minute, i’ll be right there,” you wash off your mask quickly and run to the door, realizing too late as you slide on your socked feet that you’re only in a t shirt, suna’s t shirt. you open the door to find a very intoxicated suna, leaning against your with heavy eyes and a smile, which turns to a frown when he sees you.

“hey, that’s mine,” he taps the collar of your shirt before pushing past you, slipping off his shoes and throwing his coat on the floor.

“you reek, rin. god, where were you?”

he smirks. now making himself comfy on the couch despite your protesting glares.

“the club a few blocks away, it was packed and-“ he hiccups. “y-yeah it was just busy. aran was there,”

“don’t fall asleep on my couch,” you tap his leg as you walk past, tidying up a little. he opens his eyes and sits up, slumped into the cushions. “how do you feel?”

suna doesn’t answer. he scrolls on his phone at full volume, completely ignoring you while chuckling at the different videos he comes across.

one of the worst things about your best friend was how stubborn he is normally, but that stubbornness triples when he’s had enough to drink.

you stand in front of him with your arms crossed for a few more seconds before you clear your throat. he finally looks up and waves.

“rin, why don’t you-“

“so yeah, aran was there and-“ he laughs at something on his phone, losing his train of thought.

“how about you take a shower?”

“no,” he pouts again. “why don’t you take a shower?”

you huff. “i’m calling aran to get y-“

“i think i’m going to take a shower,” he grunts, standing up and following you to the bathroom while you grab towels for him. when you finish turning the water, he begins to lift up his shirt.

“uh-uh,” you laugh to yourself and slip out the door, pulling it shut. “you can do that in private. take your time, i’m going to bed.”

“but what if i wanted you to see?”

you stutter. “y-you’re drunk, rin. just shower, please.”

you hear him clamber into the shower soon after and retreat to your bed. as you settle in, suna’s comment continues to nag at you. sure, he jokes around and has his fun with you. but in the many years being his best friend, he’s never made any sort of effort to make a move on you.

you feel dizzy, suddenly picturing suna in a way you had never before. it felt like jumping off the high dive and into water all at once.

“what am i supposed to wear?” a very wet suna waltzes into your room with a towel on his waist, and you wish you could jump into that pool right now. you can’t take your eyes off his torso, eyeing the defined muscle as they flex with every step.

“there’s s-some of your clothes here from last time, they’re clean i just forgot to give them to you,” you jump out of bed and rummage through your closet before handing him his belongings.

“oh cool,” he walks back to the bathroom, bumping into the wall on the way. you slink back to bed without another word.

just as you’re drifting off to sleep, your mattress dips.

“hi,” suna breathes, getting under your covers with you.

“what are you doing?” you hiss, voice a whisper. he stares back at you with an irritated look.

“painting a picture, what does it look like? i’m going to bed,” he huffs, pulling your covers over him and leaving your legs exposed to the cold air.

“rintaro,” you pull the covers back over you and he groans. “i don’t want to hear it! if you’re going to sleep in my bed at least share.”

he remains quiet, making himself comfortable on the other side of the bed. meanwhile, your heart is racing and your mind is fighting between being bothered and pining over your best friend.

“did you use my shampoo?”

“of course i did,” suna’s voice is tired as he finally settles in. “the extra stuff you gave me sucks. and you smell good so thought i’d use it,”

your heart skips a beat. you don’t say anything, though.

your eyes get a little heavy, mind finally relaxing as the heavy sounds of suna’s breathing lull you to sleep.

the next morning you wake up next to your best friend, blinking a few times before you get a good look at him. he’s resting against the pillow, your blanket pulled up to his bare chest while he scrolls on his phone.

“good morning rin,” you mumble, yawning and sitting up. “did you sleep okay? are you feeling today today?”

“slept great,” he mumbles, eyes not leaving his screen. “i feel okay. head hurts,”

you nod, handing him your water bottle and an aspirin from your bedside table which he happily takes.

“thanks for letting me stay here by he way,”

“of course,” you watch as he sits up, blankets falling to his hips and showcasing his muscles once more.

“i feel bad that you had to deal with me,” he looks you in your eyes and for some reason, it feels different from normal. you shrug.

“i don’t mind.”

he smirks and gets comfortable once more, but begins typing on his phone with a giggle.

“what’s so funny?”

“nothing,” he smirks at the screen. “i just told aran we slept together, though.

“rintaro!”

[urrockstar-xe]

math test - p.parker x fem!reader

posted jan 27th, 2024 3:28 pm

came up with this cutesy idea the other day, hope u enjoy :)

summary: Peter's tired of allowing Spider-Man to be a shitty boyfriend, so he makes up for it the only way he can think of that wouldn't get you in trouble.

masterlist

not proofread

wordcount: 0.8k

It was nearing 2 in the morning when Peter slowly lifted his window open from the outside, not so gracefully falling inside once it was a wide enough gap, followed by him stumbling several times as he tried to close his window while simultaneously trying to take off the red and blue spandex suit that so badly needs a wash.

The sound of his old bed frame creaking caught Peter’s attention once he finally pulled on some sweatpants. 

He whipped around, his gaze immediately falling to your half-asleep figure in his bed, a familiar sight now, one Peter had adored. Your half-opened eyes tried to focus on his silhouette. 

“Shit, hey sweetheart I didn’t mean to wake you” Peter’s whispered apology was laced with a soft muffled tone as he pulled a hoodie over his head, not bothering to fix his hair as he made his way towards his bed. “Didn’t know you were sleepin’ over tonight” He said with a tired smile playing on his lips, the bags under his eyes failing to distract you from the beauty that was your sleep-deprived boyfriend as you merely scooted over for him to join you. 

“Supposed to help me study for that test” you mumbled, no malice in your voice, no hints of irritation, not even a slight sadness to your voice at the thought of him forgetting about your plans. All you cared about at this moment was your boyfriend cuddling with you, using all your energy to open your arms for him to slide into. 

Peter stopped dead in his tracks, looking down by the nightstand and seeing your backpack on the floor, a math book sitting on the floor beside it next to a few pens. So that’s what he tripped on when he came in.

“Oh, man. I’m sorry, doll. We can work on it first thing in the morning, swear.” Peter promised, giving into what you wanted and sliding in bed next to you, wasting no time in wrapping you in his arms. 

“It’s due tomorrow, and I have to leave early for that dumb field trip.” You mumbled into his shoulder, not meaning to but making Peter feel all the worse for forgetting as he softly smoothed his hand up and down your back.

~

By the time Peter woke up the next morning you had already left, leaving behind a note on his desk.

”don’t think too hard about that test, I’ll just ask if I can have extended time on it. I’m just happy you got home safe” 

The little hearts surrounding your name at the bottom and the emphasis on him getting back at all seemed to have the opposite effect on Peter than you had intended. 

As now, he just seemed more determined to fix this problem he had made.

~

You laughed as your friend lifted her arms into the air, taking in a big deep breath as you both finally got off the bus, “freedom!” she exclaimed. 

“We have that test in like 30 minutes” You reminded her with a smile, earning a glare in response. “Buzzkill”

You chuckled this time, before watching her lift her finger and point behind you, turning as you followed where she was pointing, “that’s geek charming, what’s he doin’ here?” she asked quietly, expecting you to have an answer as you watched your boyfriend hurry over to you, green folder in his hand. 

“No clue, I’ll meet you inside” You smiled at her, watching her nod and smile back in response, walking backward towards the school while she obnoxiously waves and says “Hi, Peter!” 

Peter waved back, finally in front of you as he turned his gaze to see you already looking at him, with a soft smile. 

“Hey,” Peter matched your smile, holding out the folder to you before you could respond. “For your test, you forgot your math stuff in my room, so” 

You smiled, taking it gratefully, “Thanks, Petey. Although I don’t know how much help it’ll be-” Peter cut you off, “I mapped out in your notebook exactly how you can find any answers for the test and explained it in notes how I knew you’d be able to understand” You looked at him in awe as he rambled, watching as he took off his backpack and fumbled with it before pulling out your math notebook and handing it to you. “Peter-” “I almost wish I could take the test for you, I’ve just had so much to do lately as you know who and that’s no excuse for ditching my best girl when she needed my help so I figured this was the least I could do” Peter continued, taking a breath once he had finished. 

You set the folder and notebook down on the grass, pulling Peter into a tight embrace. “This is nice” he mumbled into your shoulder, squeezing your waist ever so slightly. “I love you, Peter Parker” You mumbled back, pulling back just enough to set a soft kiss to his lips. 

“I love you more, now go pass your test and make me proud, you can do that, can’t you, sweetheart?” Peter smiled at you, chuckling as you placed one, two, three more kisses on his mouth before pulling away and grabbing your stuff. 

“When I pass, you’re buying me dinner, baby!” You said, beginning to walk away.

“Whatever you want, doll!”

[chillian-murphy]

Let Your Big Brother Take Care of You

SUMMARY: While visiting your stepbrother at college, you have a hard time falling asleep after some drunken mishaps. He helps you out.

WORD COUNT: 2.7k

WARNINGS/ADDITIONAL INFO: Smut 🔞, dubcon, stepcest, intoxication, fingering, comfort sex kinda??, gratuitous mention of Taco Bell

Beta read by @sasybanana

Actually visiting with your step-brother had been the last thing on your mind when you told your parents that you would be visiting him this weekend. Sure, you got along fine, but you barely knew each other and it felt like he was moving out for college as soon as your families joined. Instead, you were hellbent on finding the best partying and hooking up opportunities his film school had to offer. Framing it as a sisterly visit and a chance to learn about campus life was purely an excuse to convince your parents to let you travel on your own, which they seemed to buy as you were headed off to school yourself next year. Besides, Neil had an off campus apartment you could crash at, which would be cheaper than a hotel.

He greeted you with a hug as you entered and set your stuff down, instantly being assaulted by the scent of unwashed laundry and old weed smoke. Still, it was comfortable enough, and was a nice taste of freedom from your mom’s house.

“So, my baby sister wants to visit me for the weekend, for reasons not at all related to my school’s reputation as a party campus?” He smirked as you situated yourself.

“Of course! Just like how my big brother spends all the money he gets from our parents on textbooks and tuition.” you shot back.

“Touché. Well, whatever trouble you’re determined to get into, fuck, I dunno, be smart about it. Use condoms, don’t get drugged. Don’t drink so much that you puke, or at least, try to puke somewhere other than carpet.”

“Wow… so caring.” you rolled your eyes as you headed to the bathroom to get ready for the evening. You snatched a flyer off of a phone pole for a house party, and the directions you got off google said it was only a few blocks away. As soon as you had your heels and your lashes on, you were off.

**********************************************************************************

Stumbling back to Neil’s apartment with your heels in your hand, the night had been a bust. You finished too many mystery drinks too fast and ended up puking in the lap of the one guy who was interested in you, locked yourself in the bathroom to cry for the better part of an hour, and bolted for the door as soon as you pulled yourself together. Thank fuck Neil had the first apartment on the first floor, otherwise you might not have been able to find it in your impaired state.

The door was unlocked, and Neil hadn’t moved from his place on the couch in the hours that you had been gone, presumably wrapped up in whatever it is that he does in his spare time (Watch movies? Play video games? Jerk off? You really didn’t know). This was fine, you really didn’t need him noticing you at the moment. You tried to enter quietly, but tripped over yourself as you moved.

“Holy shit, are you okay?”

Neil rushed over to you to make sure you weren’t hurt. Unable to form words, you started crying again when you met his gaze, big fat mascara tears rolling down your cheeks. Even as he helped you to stand, you wobbled on your way up and had to lean on him for support.

“How much did you have to drink?”

“Dunno… a lot.” It was true, you had chugged whatever you were handed and helped yourself to a variety of half-finished cups that were abandoned by their owners. You had never drank this much before, and had no idea how much was too much until it was too late.

“Shit, um, let’s get you to the bed. The room is yours tonight, don’t worry about it. Do you think you can walk that far?” There was genuine concern in his tone, even if he was a bit panicked and clueless. He looped an arm around your waist and guided you as best he could to the tiny room. Your flop onto the twin bed wasn’t exactly graceful, but landing on a mattress was about a thousand times more comfortable than landing on the floor.

As soon as Neil turned to leave, you began fighting your way out of your tight, itchy dress. Unfortunately, the zipper was stuck (damn cheap clothing) and the garment was too fitted to pull over your head. Refusing to spend any more time stuck in scratchy fabric hell (Seriously, Forever 21, who sells unlined sequined dresses?), you continued wrestling with the zipper and wiggling to find a better angle until you rolled off the bed and landed with a thud. Not knowing what else to do, you shouted for your stepbrother.

The worried look on his face quickly turned into an eye roll as he entered the room and saw you on the floor again.

“So are you like… determined to spend the whole night down there? Undeniably attracted to shitty carpeting? Horny for the floor?” Having a laugh at your drunken expense might not have been the nicest thing for Neil to do, but you were being such a handful tonight.

“I can’t get my dress off,” you sheepishly mumbled as you avoided his gaze. “The zipper’s stuck and I need your help.”

“Hey, hey, it’s fine.” Neil soothed as he knelt down to meet you on the floor. “If anything, I’m flattered… Usually I have to buy a girl dinner before she even thinks of asking me to undress her.”

You shot him an unamused glare, but nonetheless turned and leaned towards him so he could reach the zipper. His touch was warm and gentle as he fiddled with the impossibly tiny hook-and-eye clasp atop the zipper, one hand gently pressed against your upper back to steady you while the other went to work. Before you knew it, the dress slackened and you were able to free yourself from its confines, modesty be damned.

“A tiny little dress and no bra? You really were planning to have fun tonight.” You were still turned away from Neil and couldn’t see his face, but you could hear the grin in his voice.

“It has built-in cups, pervert!” you huffed as you rushed to cover yourself. You groped around for a t-shirt or something before remembering that you were in an unfamiliar room and not at home. “Get out, I just wanna sleep.”

“That doesn’t explain the little lacy panties, though.” Neil let his eyes trail over you before tossing you one of his own shirts. It was true, you had gone out partying with the hope of hooking up as quickly and anonymously as possible, but you weren’t going to admit that. All you wanted was to gain a little sexual experience of your own before heading out to college, but now the only boy to see you naked was your weird stepbrother. “And I’m not leaving you alone tonight. You can’t even stand and I’ve had to help you up twice. You’re too much of a mess to be alone.”

He helped you onto the bed again, only this time he climbed in behind you after hitting the light. The bed was small enough that there was almost no choice but to snuggle up to him, using his shoulder as a pillow. As weird as the whole situation was, it felt nice having him there, like a grounding tether against the spinning sensation in your head.

“For what it’s worth, I thought you looked really cute tonight. Before all the puking and crying and falling, I mean.” He chuckled softly and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. As sweet as the gesture was, you couldn’t ignore the growing gurgle in your stomach.

“Neil… I want Taco Bell.”

“I’ll buy you all the Taco Bell in the world tomorrow if you settle down and go to sleep.”

“Okay…” you buried your face into the crook between Neil’s neck and shoulder as he pulled you closer and idly rubbed your back. You couldn’t help but moan softly at the sensation, which Neil tried his hardest to ignore.

Had you been a little more awake or a little more sober, you might’ve noticed the hitch in Neil’s breath as his hand trailed up and down your back, or the way his hand soon opened into a flat palm and started exploring lower, dangerously close to the waistband of your panties. Instead, you continued to lay silently, dozing off as his hand inched lower.

Eventually, his hand made its way to your ass and cupped the supple flesh. Feeling emboldened by your lack of response, Neil began to squeeze and knead. This made you squirm away, but in doing so, you were met with the perfect amount of friction as your clothed pussy rubbed against Neil’s thigh. Neither of you had realized just how closely you were snuggled together until now, when it dawned on you both what was happening.

Part of you panicked, part of you realizing that this was wrong through your drunken haze, but another part of you only cared that you were being touched, and it felt pleasurable. That was the whole reason you made this trip, right? you rationalized to yourself as you attempted to grind against your stepbrother’s thigh a second time. 

Instead of being met with the delicious friction, you felt Neil shift beneath you. Did you fuck this up? Were you just imagining his hand on your ass? But before you could worry any further, he was rolling you onto your back with his thick, firm leg pressing between your thighs and spreading them, and the unmistakable poking of his erection against the spot where your hip met your belly. He pushed his thigh against you, inviting you to grind it.

“Is this what my horny little sister needs? Can’t fall asleep without coming?” His voice was low and husky, in equal parts from being half asleep and his obvious arousal. You were starting to transition from drunk to hungover, feeling more drowsy and dizzy than anything else, and the most you could answer with was a pathetic little whimper as he nudged you.

You rubbed yourself against him as best you could, unable to find just the right angle from the new position you were placed in. In a fit of frustration, you tried pushing Neil off of you so you could rub yourself with your hand, but he was deceptively strong and had you pinned.

“Neeeeeeeeeiiiillllll” you whined, once again wondering if this was all a mistake, maybe you should just try to fall asleep and forget this ever happened. Forget the whole night ever happened. Change your name, move across the country, and never talk to anyone who witnessed tonight ever again.

“Shhhh, it’s alright, just lie there and let your big brother take care of you.”

Just lying there was about all you could do as Neil snaked one of arms between your legs, stroking your folds through your panties a bit aimlessly before gathering the courage to reach beneath the cloth and explore further. After a bit of awkward poking around, he found your clit and began circling it gently with his fingertips, eliciting another whimper, this time of pleasure.

“See? I know exactly what you need. M’gonna play with your little pussy until you relax and fall asleep, like a good girl.” His fingers began teasing your slit, tracing up and down its length without daring to breach inside. It never would have occurred to you that Neil would know his way around pussy, he never brought any girls home when he lived with you. He must’ve gotten a lot of practice after moving out, because the way his fingers were just barely ghosting over you was driving you crazy in a way you couldn’t understand. You wanted him to stop, you wanted him to continue exactly what he was doing, you wanted him to start giving you more. All you knew was that you wanted him, and for him to keep touching you.

As if he could read your mind, he spread your innermost lips and plunged two of his fingers inside. The stretch was sudden, but not at all unwelcome. You were wet enough for him to thrust his fingers in and out of you easily, spreading your slick wherever he touched. As soon as he began alternating between fucking you on his fingers and roughly toying with your clit, you started seeing stars.

“You like that? You like me finger fucking your tight little pussy? I wish I could see it, I bet it's all pink and cute, like your nipples. I bet you’ve never even taken a cock before."

Too drunk, too horny, and too tired to form words, the most you could do was shyly squeak in affirmation.

“Next time I’ll have you bounce on my cock so I can watch your face as you come. Or maybe I’ll eat you out so I can really get to see how cute your pussy is. Or maybe you’ll just want to pay back the favor I’m doing you now and suck me off.”

Next time? You hadn’t considered something like this happening again, or even the fact that you’d have to see him again. In mixed company. With your parents around. Would he fuck you in your childhood bedroom while everyone else was downstairs cooking dinner? Or would he keep your liaisons a dirty little secret that only happened away from home?

You didn’t care. You were coming from your stepbrother’s touch, in your stepbrother’s bed, far away from anyone else you knew. You felt your stomach tighten and your toes involuntarily curl, much stronger than you ever felt sneakily rubbing yourself in the shower. Thank fuck you were in a dark room, because you swore you could feel your face going all stupid.

You must not have realized how much you were panting and clenching around his fingers, because Neil seemed to know exactly how close you were and began whispering in your ear, encouraging you to come. You could barely register what he was saying, you were so lost in the sensation of his breath on your neck and his hand on your cunt.

Your orgasm finally took hold, and you could hear yourself babbling in pleasure but had no idea what you were saying, if you were even forming coherent words, as the pleasure ripped through your body like an electric shock. After the initial burst, you felt your body relax in a way you didn’t know was possible, releasing tension you didn’t even know you were holding. You swore you could feel yourself melting through the mattress before realizing that no, that was just sweat.

Noticing that you were lying there like a limp noodle and no longer squirming and moaning, Neil rolled off of you, withdrawing his hand from your panties. His fingers were completely soaked with your wetness, and while his initial instinct was to wipe them off on his shirt, roll over, and go to sleep, he couldn’t ignore the fact that he was rock hard. In a stroke of genius that would soon lead to literal stroking, he realized he had the perfect lube on hand.

He shoved his drenched hand down his boxers and began tugging his desperate member, softly grunting in rhythm with his pumping fist. Part of you felt bad that you weren’t helping, you had kinda forgotten that Neil was a complete person with desires of his own and not just a machine to get you off, but you were cozy and half asleep and he seemed to be handling the situation well enough on his own. At least, well enough that he was coming all over the front of his shirt.

He carefully pulled his soiled shirt over his head and wiped off his hand and what was left of his mess before tossing it on the floor and reaching for the blanket that had been kicked to the bottom of the bed amidst all the excitement. You felt yourself being tucked in as you gently dozed off, snuggling into Neil’s side as soon as he laid down beside you.

Yeah, you were going to visit your step brother a lot more often now.

[st44rgirlxo]

clubbing with katsuki is always fun

as you add the finishing touches to your makeup. katsuki walks into your shared room. he leans against the door frame watching you.

“are you almost done you’ve been doing your makeup for hours, we need to leave” he growls

“ok ok geez im almost done hold on”

“your not even changed yet, your still have my shirt on”

ignoring him you get up and pick up the clothes laid down on your bed and head to the bathroom.

after a few minutes you walk out in a black mini skirt and a dark red halter top. grabbing your keys and purse you walk out to the living room.

katsuki is sitting on the couch with his phone in his hands mindlessly scrolling on his phone.

“fuck you look good ma”

you smile and kiss him. his hands make their way to your waist. the kiss starts to get heated but you pull away before it goes any further.

“babe we need to go cmon”’

“tch, we don’t even have to go let’s just stay here”

“we can’t and you know that kats”

he grumbles and gets up anyway. as he grabs his car keys he grabs his coat.

“bring a sweater your gonna get cold”

“no i don’t need one beside it would ruin my outfit and my tits look so good in this top”

“whatever don’t come crying to me when your freezing”

you both walk out the door and get in katsukis car. once you get in you start touching up your makeup in the car mirror. he bought you one that lights up.

his hands make his way to rest on your thigh. occasionally squeezing it. you hold his hand and caress it with his thumb.

as your arrive to the nightclub you spotted your friends walking in. you both get out of the car and instantly the cool wind hits you.

the second you walk up to your friends shots are immediately handed to you and katsuki “fuckkk yeah” you pour a shot in your mouth like it’s water

just by the looks of it katsuki knew he was going to have to be taking extra care of you tonight.

he was almost in awe becuase of how you took drink after drink, but he knew he was gonna have to stop you soon before your threw up or somthing.

“that’s enough y/n.”

“whattt your no fun katsuki” you say as your slurring your words

“I LOVE THIS SONG!!” “here hold my heels kats”

you quickly take off your heels and run barefoot to the dance floor, tripping multiple times.

he watches as you dance with all your friends but something was off, the look on your face looked like you were about to throw up.

“we’re leaving now”

he slides a hand around your waist and sits you down to put your heels on. as you walk out of the club he rubs your back in a reassuring way

“you need to learn to pace yourself”

“yeahyeah whatever” you say leaning against him

he opens the car door for you, helping you sit down, and shutting it after you get it.

you fall asleep in the car ride home

you look so beautiful katsuki couldn’t help but smile at your sleeping figure

he drapes his sweater he brought just for you over you

“i love you”

idk if I like this 😟😟 but should I lowkey do a hangover part??

requests are opennnn🙌🙌

[awritesthings1]

All The Things We Don't Say

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Female Reader

Summary: An anthology of your life with Tommy, from friends to strangers to lovers, and all the little moments in between.

Warnings: 18+, implied DV, substance abuse, childhood trauma, ptsd, overprotective tommy, swearing, brief smut, longfic oneshot, feminist themes (motherhood & being a wife in the 1920s).

ao3 link

-

Smash!

“Pick it up!”

Your daddy was a drunk. You remembered the fact since you could walk. He stayed home while the working men left for the factories, then disappeared in the late hours of the morning until his eventual return when the slam of the front door woke the household up. Mother used to hold you at night as she curled up in your bed. She was sick a lot. Always sniffing into the back of your neck when you were asleep. Sometimes the sleeve of your nightgown would get soaked while she muffled her hiccups.

She looked sad, too. In the morning, she kept the curtains drawn and stayed away from the outside world. She told you it was to keep nosey Mrs. Gretel away from her family affairs. But Mrs. Gretel had left Birmingham two months prior.

By seven years old, you were the 'man' of the house. You had gone to sleep one night, and when you awoke, your mother had vaporized into the air like a rabbit in a hat.

“She left because of you,” your father slurred at you.

You hated him.

She left behind her long-sleeve dresses, scarves, and wicker hats that covered nearly every inch of her skin. They were far too big for you then, but when your father came home at the end of the week with a stack of cash, you ran to your mother’s closet, which had remained untouched until then, to find only cobwebs. Gone. Every single one of her dresses. You looked out at the moon in those early hours of the morning and swore to it that when you were bigger, you would get him back so much worse.

And so you were left to clean up his smashed glass bottles and scrub the alcohol out of the gritty carpet. Your little hands struggled to pluck the glass from the floorboards. In a year’s time, they were covered in little scars.

On your tenth birthday, you decided you were grown enough to take matters into your own hands. When he was passed out on the floor from whatever he managed to fill his pipe with, you grabbed the small bottles he hid under a loose floorboard and poured them into the gutter at the back of your house.

You turned to run back to the door when the contents of the bottle were empty, but a ball almost tripped you over. You gripped your tattered skirt before you could lose your footing and snapped your head around with a fierce pout.

“That’s my ball,” pointed a young Thomas Shelby.

You put your small hands on your smaller hips. “You kicked it my way on purpose!”

You weren’t entirely sure, but you suspected it.

“Maybe I thought you were pretty,” he grinned.

You noticed his two front teeth were missing.

“Ewwww! I would never go out with you!” You squawked.

At ten years old, you knew better than that.

Seemingly unaffected by your distaste, he continued. “Do you live there?” He nodded to the house whose roof was falling apart.

“What’s it to you?” You frowned stubbornly, not wanting to admit that, yes, that was your house.

“The curtains are always drawn,” he answered, walking over to pick up his ball from your feet. He was the same height as you were at the time. “My brother Arthur said it’s haunted. He saw a ghost in the window once. He said it was a woman and that she starved to death.”

Your nose scrunched up. "Well, he’s a phony!”

You ran inside said house and slammed the door shut.

He kissed you down by the docks that winter. It was your first kiss, and a clumsy one at that, so you didn’t remember much of it.

By thirteen, you had given in and sold the rest of your mother’s belongings to support yourself. You hated yourself for it, and that nagging voice inside your head told you that you were no better than your father. Oh, and your father? Your father lost vision in his left eye from a bar fight. Too bad it wasn’t both.

Sometime later, a boy two years older than you saw your wandering hand in someone’s bag at the fair and threatened to teach you some manners ‘the hard way’. You bit anxiously on your nails and pleaded with him because he was bigger than most boys his age, when Tommy’s brother Arthur (who you’d seen hanging around the Garrison) came passing by and threatened to ‘toss him about’. The other boy, not all believing in Arthur’s temper, rushed forward, and the two ended up rolling in the dirt, but by then you were gone with a stolen pocket watch in your fist. Nearly two legs and an arm deep in poverty, some quick cash, or a hero complex? You’d take the penny.

At fourteen, a lady knocked on your door. It was a lady of the night who had come to inform your father that he had fathered a son with her. You were glad it was a boy. A girl wouldn’t have stood a chance in the slums of Birmingham. Life was hard, but Birmingham was harder. Your father had refused to listen to the young woman and shooed her off. You never saw her teary-eyed face again.

At fifteen, your father attempted to wash his hands of you by marrying you off to the highest bidder. There was no real auction, but just about anyone who suggested a handsome sum of money did the trick.

“His name is William,” you exhaled, kicking your legs over the edge of the dock.

Tommy laughed. “You won’t marry him.”

“What choice do I have, Tom?”

Your finances were getting tight, and the gloomy pressure to take up working at night like many young ladies was beginning to loom closer and closer. You hated being a woman. Boys would never have to worry about selling themselves to survive.

“I’ll put a gypsy curse on him,” he decided, squinting his eyes from the bright reflection dancing across the water.

You hit his shoulder.

“No, you won't, because then you’ll be cursing me.”

The severity of your situation began to dawn on Tommy. No amount of pestering Polly for change to spare would relieve you of your burden any longer.

“That’s it, then?” He gulped, shifting his glassy eyes to the harbor.

You sighed and followed his gaze.

“Maybe it won’t be so bad. I’ll never have to see dad again, and William promised to take care of me.”

Tommy scoffed.

You frowned at him. “What?”

He shook his head.

“What! Tom—”

“Don’t marry him.”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh, here we go, why?”

“You know why.”

You were engaged to William on the eve of your seventeenth birthday. He was a very proper man and never dared to go any further than hooking an arm around yours on formal occasions. You were never attracted to his thin mustache nor the thick lenses he wore. In fact, he was incredibly awkward at social occasions, always checking his pocket watch and avoiding eye contact with whichever circle he stood in.

Tommy began to fade out of your life around that time. Margaret—a lady who had taken you on to help with the sewing of her family’s tailoring business—told you that Tommy was spotted arm in arm with another girl that week. You expected to feel jealous, but you felt nothing. You knew love would never be your right. Love was for the more fortunate.

You spent that year learning how to be a wife. Surprisingly, it wasn’t too different from what you did as a child—cooking and cleaning up like you did when your father came home, that is. It was comforting to have a routine in place. It meant finality—no one walking in and out of your life as they pleased, and certainly no more growling stomachs. Perhaps being a wife was a skill your mother never learned. You were grateful for William’s mother, who seemed to be more than enthusiastic to show you the reigns.

After a year-long engagement, you caught your fiancé, William, locked in a compromising position with another man.

��Oh,” was all you got out before leaving his house.

You lacked the special ingredient that marriages needed: love.

You sat down at the fountain across the street. William and his lover’s silhouette were visible behind the blinds he had drawn on the second floor, which peered over the sidewalk. You watched their shadows fluster their feathers around the room like headless geese, and for a moment your head surfaced above water and laughter frothed out between your sealed lips. Perhaps Birmingham made you a little mad.

You didn’t go through with the marriage. You suspected William was relieved.

That week, your father left. You never knew whether he left on his own accord or just never made it home one night. Either way, you never really cared to find out.

With nothing left to lose, you knocked on the Shelby family’s door at Watery Lane. Finn appeared around the other side of the door a moment later.

“Is Tommy home?”

Finn nodded, spinning on his heel to alert his brother. When Tommy did appear, his shoulders were tensed. Disheveled hair never looked so stylish on him. When you saw his suspenders (which were hastily thrown on), you wanted to ask who he expected to be at the door that he planned to answer dressed in such fashion but then thought better of it. He peered down at you, then checked over his shoulder before ushering you inside and up to his bedroom.

“It’s… smaller than I thought,” you landed on, taking in his room.

After all these years, you had never stepped foot into the Shelby home. You weren’t the type of person to come door-knocking.

You turned around to face Tommy after hearing him click the lock on his door.

“Are you hurt?" were the first words he had spoken to you in a year.

“No.” You pressed your lips together, eyeing everything from the bed to the view out the window.

Silence followed closely after.

“Then why are you here?” Tommy sighed.

Your vision began to blur then. “I don’t know,” you said honestly, trying to stop your bottom lip from trembling.

Desperately, you pushed your hair back and straightened up, attempting to hold yourself together. You must have looked like a puppet being held together by a string, given how poor you looked.

Tommy’s boots pad across the wooden floor. “You love me?”

Did that word truly exist? How could you answer if you never knew what it meant to love?

You don’t meet his eyes. He licked his lips, pushing your head up to meet his with his thumb. His eyebrows rose expectantly.

“I don’t know what to do, Tom,” you breathed, avoiding his question. “I’m all alone now. No William, no father…”

His lips parted, and you watched with fascination as the cogs turned in his head. “Yes… that is a problem." His breath fanned over your face.

You gagged, a reaction you yourself had not expected, before rushing to his door, only to remember that, yes, he had locked it, before turning to the nearest silver bucket in the corner to empty your guts.

The first thing you heard when you caught your breath was, “are you pregnant?”

No, but when you stand so close to me and I can smell the cigarettes you smoke and your freshly washed skin, I can imagine a future where we are married, and I see your face growing more disappointed as we age together because you married a woman who never knew how to be a mother to your children nor a wife who knew to tend to you with affection by your bedside when you’re ill.

“No,” you choked, spitting out the vile taste in your mouth. “We never did anything.”

You wanted him to know that. You wanted him to think that you never let William touch you because you never loved him, not because William wasn’t interested in girls.

A moment later, Tommy sat beside you on the floor and quietly combed your hair away from your wobbling lips.

“So, if you’re not pregnant and you don’t love me, why are you here?”

You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand. How were you supposed to answer that? After letting your guts loose in his room, you thought he would surely have booted you out the door.

A knock came on the door: “Tommy?”

“A minute, Finn!” Tommy growled at the door, refusing to back away from your trembling frame.

You were so hungry. Margaret had to cut back your hours ever since her husband fell ill. She spent more time by his bedside than keeping the store open, which meant you were making less than usual. The imminent closing of the store hung over your head like a taunting crow, gouging your insides like you were Prometheus. Birmingham your chains, a woman your fate, and the bird your punishment for thinking you deserved more.

“I should go.” You shivered at the draft inching towards your skin from the open window.

Tommy’s intense gaze stuttered, falling to your lap, where you picked at the dead skin around your nails. He cleared his throat, fishing out the key from his pocket. Although it was dull and muted from the years, it gleaned brightly in your eyes as if it were the reward you came for. Flushed, you grabbed it out of his hands without sparing a glance. Electricity sparked in those precious seconds, igniting a deadly fire in your belly.

“You’re cold." Tommy flinched at your touch.

You retreated as soon as the key slid into the hole and unlocked with a click. In your haste, you left the most valuable thing you owned there in his room.

Your heart.

The months went by, and summer arrived. The stories your mother told you left you expecting a bright gleam of air that would wash over the streets and paint each tree and every patch of grass a frighteningly bright green that would even encourage grumpy Mrs. Gretel to come out to preen her stubborn roses that would just not grow. Birmingham left less to be desired. The summer days never came, and that persisting bitter bog thickened, albeit with slightly less rain. There were gray clouds, smoke from the factories, and a shivering north westerly, which pushed said clouds at breakneck speed as if they had somewhere to be. You looked to the sky one day and said a prayer for blue breezes and sweltering sun, but the sky was empty.

Sometime later, men marched the streets armed with guns in their ‘dashing’ uniforms. A war, they said, a great one. Queues lined the street for the post offices and grocers. Rain rivaled the bustle of the city. What did it feel like to love someone so much as to stand in the pouring rain next to the gutter? You wanted that kind of love. Not the love you could only give yourself because even you didn’t want your own love.

One of the soldiers decorated in medals stood on a crate at the port, yelling something supposedly inspiring that captured the attention of many young men. The words honorable and patriotic were tossed in there like a delectable salad, enticing them in the way farmers held a carrot to a pig’s snout.

You pitied their mothers. Their daughters were married off, and then their sons were swooning over the idea of dying. Birmingham was filthy, rotting, and disgusting. You needed to leave.

You kissed Margaret goodbye on the cheek one Tuesday morning. Ever since your pockets turned out empty, you had been working as a bedside nurse for her ill-stricken husband. They were good to you, and they were probably the only people you could consider family.

She patted your cheek and said, "you're doing good to serve this country.”

You hadn’t had the heart to tell her you were leaving because the city was marring your flesh, so you slipped her the sugarcoated lie of wanting to join the war effort so that you might help others who were bedridden, just like her husband.

At the train station, you stood with your suitcases held tightly in both arms. You had to set one down to hold onto your hat as a train full of men waving their caps out the window pulled into the station. Some children weaved between the crowd, wagging a newspaper above their heads, hoping to make a quick penny. To your side, women wept for their brothers, husbands, and lovers.

“Who are you wishing off?” asked an elderly woman who was clutching her cane.

“Oh, I’m not. I’m boarding the next train.”

She laughed, and you wondered how old your mother would be now. Would she have grown wrinkles and settled into a deeper laugh like this woman?

“My dear, you have a bright imagination if you think they will let a woman on any of these trains.”

A sudden anger filled your blood. “Why not?”

“These men are heading straight for London, where they will be shipped away to France to fight,” the woman explained as if it were any other day.

“I’ll catch the next train then.”

She shook her head, and her frail hand curled tighter around her cane. “They’ve stopped the trains so they can transport soldiers to London.”

You frowned. “Then how will I leave Birmingham?”

You’ll never forget her dismissive laughter.

“My dear, you won’t.”

Men boarded the train, clapping each other on the back with a wink and a laugh. When a line of men on the platform thinned, the train whistled, and you looked over just in time to see Polly, Ada, and little Finn standing with their hands crossed over their hearts as they waved to the train.

No. It wasn’t possible.

But it was because you caught the gleam of the razors sewn into their peaky caps. Tommy, Arthur, and John all stood aboard the train, sticking their heads out and waving to Polly and Ada with a grin that wrung your stomach like a wet cloth.

Those countless daydreams you spun, the intricate webs you wove, began breaking down to thin fibers. In one pathway, you stayed there in his room and told him the truth you always denied yourself. You loved him. In another, you stood next to Polly, close to tears, as you begged him to come home safely. There was a resounding click in that moment as your breath stuttered. You had been the person who wiped away those futures, thinking it was nothing but an annoying spiderweb. Oh, how wrong you were!

“Tommy!” You left your suitcases behind and stepped around the old woman as you ducked under hugs and tearful goodbyes.

“Tommy!” You cried again with the gusto of someone who certainly shouldn’t be as concerned as they were considering you left him in his room that day.

Thankfully, his eyes eventually found yours as you pushed through the last line of people. You stood there and stomached all your regrets head-on. It was funny how, up until that moment, you managed to squash every seed of doubt. Why was it that you only realized what you had when it was slipping out of reach?

He never called your name back. He just stared at you blankly as the train pulled away, unlike you, who clung to the image of his frame even as the train disappeared from sight and the crowd began to disperse. You stood there unblinking, hoping to soak up the last of him before you forgot the intensity of his eyes or the humming rumble of his voice. Because the idea of something you held dearly becoming a memory meant that it could as easily be forgotten, and that terrified you. Your eyes were watering now, against your best wishes.

You overheard Polly ushering Finn and Ada off. Finn rushed home without protest, but Ada stopped in her tracks when she saw you hunched over your knees in tears. She smiled weakly before chasing Finn home. It was then that Polly’s shadow approached your huddled frame. She didn’t say anything, and for a moment, you weren’t sure if she expected you to stand and apologize for being such a mess. That’s when a penny clattered to the ground beside you. She squeezed your shoulder once before disappearing.

You kissed that penny as if Tommy would feel the power of it across the country, then ran back to Margaret’s, having forgotten your suitcases.

“Oh…” She exclaimed, slapping her tea towel on the counter when you walked into the kitchen. “You missed your train?”

Dread made your stomach tender and your breath short.

“I’m enrolling in the Red Cross.”

-

Throughout the war, you thought of Tommy every day until your stomach lurched. Would it have worked if you had stayed? Would you both have grown old together instead of subjecting yourself to the spray of dirt when a bomb went off nearby?

A day ago, your supply rations never came. It wasn’t like hunger was anything new, but when your mind was too focused on surviving the perilous weather, it was hard to save other lives. You made work with what little supplies you had left. The morphine went stint within hours of its arrival, and the cries of pained soldiers filled the medical tent all night. You did what you could, wiped sweat from their foreheads, and wrote letters to their mothers and lovers with what supplies you could scavenge. Some were written on cardboard from shell packaging, others on torn pages from the bibles they kept over their hearts. Pens were useless—the ink ran in the rain—so you scribbled everything down in pencil.

Before you left for France, you were warned of the bullets. No one ever warned you about the shrapnel, nor the bombs or grenades. They shattered soldiers’ bones beyond repair and left bodies unrecognizable. There wasn’t much you could do when most of their flesh was missing.

Keeping faith became an impossible task. Supplies were depleted, and nurses were dejected. Sally, who had been writing home for news of her brother, recently had her letters returned with the black stamp. Death—return to sender. She spent only an hour sitting on a trunk, letting her tears fall, before she got back to work. Grief privileged those with time, something no one could afford in these conditions.

Then it came—the day Arthur Shelby was carried in on a stretcher. You were making your rounds around the beds when a truckload of yelling men pooled through the entrance of the tent.

“Nurse!” They all yelled, some limping, others setting down stretchers of men on the dirt between the filled beds.

You and two other nurses dropped everything and ran over to attend to the wounded. They were all covered head to toe in dirt, groaning and clutching limbs that were twisted the wrong way. One in particular coughed and huffed while he fought against hands, which were fruitlessly pushing him back down on the stretcher.

“Let me go!” He yelled, wrestling against an older nurse.

“It’s alright, Mary. I’ll handle this one,” you patted her shoulder as you swapped places.

You dunked a washcloth into a bucket of water to wipe away the dirt in his eyes. “Calm down; you're safe here,” you said, starting your usual script of reassurances.

When the striking blue eyes squinted up at you, your blood ran cold. You froze before taking his head in both your hands, despite his protests. “Arthur? Arthur, it’s me!”

He loosened his grip on your wrist. “Huh?”

“It’s me! Where’s Tommy and John?”

He spat blood and gritted his teeth. “Fucking hell, where’s the whiskey?”

You laughed despite the smell of blood encompassing the tent. You quickly fetched the alcohol you had been using to clean wounds and pressed it to his lips. You weren’t sure if it was whiskey or not, but you reasoned he was in too much pain to be able to tell. He drank it with a groan of pleasure. You didn’t try to snatch the bottle away as he emptied it down his palette; you just sat and grinned at the way he suckled it like a newborn baby while you cleaned away his cuts.

“I’ve never been happier to see you, Arthur.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbled, his lips still wrapped around the bottle.

You tried to stay by his side for as long as you could before the second wave of patients came tumbling through the flaps of the tent. One of them lost their grip on the stretcher, and the patient went sliding into the dirt headfirst.

“Fuck!” They all swore, abandoning the stretcher to drag the limp man further into the makeshift hospital.

You rushed to help when a hand gripped the back of your neck. You yelped in pain as your hair got caught in a fingernail when they turned you to face them.

And there he was: Tommy Shelby, covered in a thick layer of dirt, heaving for air.

“Nurse! Nurse!” Voices cried for you, but between the ringing in your ears and the wrath in Tommy’s blue eyes, you were frozen in place.

“The fuck are you doing here, eh?” He yelled over the anguished men.

You suddenly felt stupid standing there in your Red Cross uniform.

“I was looking for you, I—”

His dirty hands cupped your cheeks—something you were painfully aware of from the uncomfortable itch from the mud on your flushed skin—and pulled your forehead to his.

“You think this is some fantasy?” He squinted. “You think there’s any fucking moonlight to kiss under here, eh?” He spat.

His eyes held that haunted look you had seen on many soldiers that passed through the medical tent. Your eyes watered. Perhaps it was from the humidity and dirt being kicked up as nurses and patients scuffled around, not because you could hardly recognize the man in front of you. The blood smeared above his eyebrow worried you, so you reasoned that he was mad because it had been leaking into his eyes. Dutifully, you reached to wipe it with the back of your hand. He grabbed your wrist harshly, bringing it down to your side. He was in shock; you scolded yourself.

“Where’s John and Arthur?” Tommy swallowed, flexing his hands.

You led him to Arthur, who had been left in his corner while the nurses attended to more serious cases. It hurt watching the brothers reunite after their ordeal, so you left them alone no matter how much you feared them being discharged before your return. After all, everything you ever wanted sat in that corner, but it would be selfish to coddle Tommy all to yourself. Still, you couldn’t help sparing a glance when you walked up and down the tent, attending to patients.

Later that night, he came to you under the candlelight of your tent. He cleared his throat upon entry. You were lying face-up on your cot when he cleared his throat and peeled back the entrance to enter. The candlelight painted the mountain peaks of his face in a dull amber and the valleys in a frightening shadow. You sat up, pulling the thick cover over your shift.

Tommy kneeled next to you, resting on the heels of his boots. He licked his chapped lips and itched his nose. “You don’t belong here.”

Your grip on the cover loosened. “Huh?”

Nothing prepared you for when he swung his brooding stare towards you. He exhaled loudly before running a hand over his face.

“You should have stayed in Birmingham.” He said it like a warning.

“And done what?”

Vulnerability never looked good on Tommy. His head hung and his fingers itched at the back of his head—a tick you used to love; now you weren’t so sure. Because your Tommy was never afraid, but this man in front of you was alarmingly tense despite the clear efforts to mask it.

What have they done to you, Tom?

Under the dim light of your tent, you barely recognized him. A stranger’s eyes were blown wide in a frightening state of shock, something most soldiers mirrored. War washed out the sweet blue pair you knew, refitting them for a steely weapon. You hated seeing him like this, so still, so unsteady, cocooned into the corner as if afraid to take up space.

You feared you looked no better. Having worked till the point of exhaustion, you usually found yourself awakening against a wooden crate or trunk to the cries of patients who demanded your attention despite your body not having the strength to stand. Today you had been lucky and found yourself crawling distance to your private tent when your knees started wobbling and your head lulling.

The wooden reinforcing of your private tent fought in vain to shelter your bodies from the elements; it still flapped and whipped about, sometimes rocking your cot. Yet Tommy remained still like those life-size stone statues you’d find outside an important building, brooding at the dirt and locked in an internal battle. You shifted to the edge of your makeshift bed and leaned close enough that you saw how the top buttons of his dirtied uniform were missing and most of his clothes were torn.

His arm, which was breaking out in goosebumps, lay heavily across his knee so that he could rest his forehead there limply. He looked in a bad enough condition that you feared the possibility of him succumbing to the wasteland threatening him outside your tent. You wrapped your arms around the scruff of his hair and pulled his face into your stomach, where he could hide from the terrible world. On instinct, his arms wound around your waist, and you felt his warm exhale against your skin through the thin fabric of your slip.

His tin water bottle clanged against the satchel he wore, which made you wonder if he had any time to rest at all if he still had all his equipment tied to his uniform.

“I didn’t…” His voice was muffled by your slip. He cleared his throat again, shaking his head.

When he dropped the thought, you spoke up. “Have you eaten?”

He slapped your thigh haphazardly. “No, do you have a cigarette?”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes, instead gently pushing him away so you could kneel beneath your bed and fish a cigarette from your satchel. You pinched one from its tin case, then thought better of it and tossed it on Tommy’s lap. Gratefully, he collected one from the case and lit it with a nearby candle. You watched his chest rise and fall as he took an especially deep drag. His eyes shut as the nicotine rushed to his head.

“Fuck, that’s good,” he muttered under his breath.

“How are you here, Tommy? One of the night nurses should’ve been on watch.”

“Oh,” smoke puffed out of his mouth, and he raised his eyebrows, “there is.”

“Then how—”

“I had to see you.”

The butterflies in your stomach dove. The blue in his eyes appeared translucent as they hazed over like a ghost. His shoulders were slumped dejectedly, and he had a hand pushing through his greasy, unwashed hair to relieve his neck from the weight of his thoughts.

He pointed to you then, with the cigarette nursed between his fingers. “I need to know why you changed your mind.”

“About what, Thomas?”

His voice slurred and slipped into a deeper register from the lack of sleep. "Why you came back. Why you came to France.” Tommy shook his head lazily. “You expect me to believe you had a sudden change of heart? What? You a patriot now?” An amused exhale curled out while he took another drag. “Well I don’t believe it.”

You began shivering despite the way your body flushed.

“How’s Arthur?” You tried to avert the conversation.

“Bloody drunk off his ass.”

“And you?”

Tommy held your stare and swallowed dryly. “Trying.”

“You can go join him if you wish.”

He looked at the entrance of your tent as if he were weighing his options, then shook his head and took another drag before clearing his throat. “It’s different now.”

Naïvely, you sank to the ground beside him and rested a hand on his shoulder. “It doesn’t have to be.”

He sighed.

“I wish that were true.”

-

The next time you saw Tommy, you were working a shift at the hospital. After the war, you received a medal for your efforts, which easily got you a job in Birmingham. You pleaded with them to send you to any other hospital—London, Manchester, Liverpool—you didn’t care. Anywhere but Birmingham.

“You should be honored to work for me!” Exclaimed the head nurse at Birmingham Hospital, who didn’t seem too pleased with your distaste for the city.

You thought the job would be the final nail in the coffin, but you surprisingly got along well with the head nurse once you had put your animosity aside. So much so, she offered to lease you a room upstairs from hers.

Then came that dreaded night where you were finishing the filing of some documents when a patient was being rushed in. Your ears perked up, and you looked through the blinds of the office to see a man being rushed by. Something small and round had fallen off the stretcher while the nurses paid no attention, pushing him around the corner and down towards the operating theater. Curious, you exited the office.

And there on the ground was one of those peaky caps Tommy and his brothers used to wear. You knew this because you picked it up and nearly cut yourself on the blade that was sewn into the seam. You spent the next hour gnawing on your nails. Your imagination sparked ideas about the beaten man who was lying in an operating room two doors down in surgery. Was it Tommy? Arthur? John? The shadows under your eyes darkened at the thought. No, it was probably some other Peaky Blinder. The Shelby brothers were too careful. Still, you knocked over your coffee in a mad dash to the bathroom, where you heaved up your dinner.

You volunteered to stay until the morning, but the head nurse on duty for the night refused and sent you home. You didn’t sleep at all that night.

The next morning, you arrived early and made a beeline for the emergency ward. You grabbed the admission form and scanned the patient list. There were only two emergency patients who were listed under the final hour of your shift, a woman and a man, which made it easier to narrow it down to the man who was admitted at quarter to midnight in ward four, room seven.

When you peaked through the crack in the door, you knew you had been worried for a reason. Tommy lay under the covers, battered and bruised, with a swollen eye and a nasty scar where he had reportedly received surgery for trauma to the head.

You slipped inside quietly and closed the door. Tommy’s eyes were closed, and his mouth hung open, stealing miniscule amounts of air into his lungs. He looked as good as a ghost.

“Tommy…” You clutched his peaky cap (which you meant to return) between your fingers.

He didn’t move an inch, so you set the cap down by his bedside table, carefully watching the rise and fall of his chest.

What have they done to you, Tom?

On the second week, he woke up while you were cleaning the windowsill. He coughed, and you whipped around in shock.

“Nurse?” He asked hoarsely, blinking away the blinding light.

You rushed to his side, tears bursting like the fountain you passed on your way to work.

“Don’t move,” you urged when he tried to sit up.

“I have to get to London,” he slurred, only half awake.

You weren’t upset that he didn’t recognize you. You weren’t upset that he didn’t recognize you.

“Tommy… it’s me.”

He shrugged your hand off his shoulder with a hiss. “Fucking hell.”

Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“Please don’t move; I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” You couldn’t hide the way your voice broke.

He looked up at you, then, through bloodshot blue eyes. You wished you knew what was going through his head. Happy or sad?

“Am I dead?”

“No,” you smiled weakly as a tear fell.

“Can I have a smoke then?”

-

“I don’t know how to love, Tommy!”

“Yeah? Yeah? That’s bullshit! Why do you keep coming back then?” He pinched your chin, glaring furiously into your eyes. “Eh?”

He stood so close that he blocked the light from the chandelier, which mournfully hung from the ceiling. You shivered in his shadow.

“I shouldn’t have come tonight.”

“But you did!” He accused, pointing in your face.

“It was a mista—”

“You fucking did!”

“Tommy!”

“I’ve had it! If you want to leave, then fucking leave; otherwise, don’t stand there all righteous waving empty threats over my head because I know you won’t leave.” He shook his head with a wild look in his eye. “No… You won’t leave. You won’t leave because you love me. You keep coming back,” he pointed matter-of-factly.

Tommy’s eyebrows danced between being terribly furrowed and alarmingly raised during his passionate monologue. It was rare for him to emit so much emotion these days. The war changed men, and Tommy was no exception. A chilling stillness framed his presence, which even you weren’t excused from. No more laughter, no more dreams of working with horses, because he was above all that now, wasn’t he? It was ambition that ground his teeth together and hollowed his eyes. Still, you couldn’t forget that the anger came from vulnerability, because it took a lot for someone to get under Thomas Shelby’s skin.

You moved to grab your purse, to make good on his word, but he halted your movement by grabbing your shoulders, roughly at first, before loosening his grip. You softened at his frantic demeanor. He was scared—oh,  so afraid of you walking out that door again. But how could you ever explain it to him? You were never born for love. You would never know how to love him properly the way wives were supposed to because what you felt for Tommy was sickeningly deep. So much so that the mere impression of him sealed off your ribcage and ruined any chance of your heart beating for any other soul, so much so that you carried the weight of him in your bones because you could never shake him off.

When you looked back at life, all you saw was the absence of love. You used to imagine yourself growing up and falling in love with a handsome stranger, then getting married in a proper white dress to go live in your proper house. But when you looked in the mirror, you saw a ghost. The pathway of your life was laid out before your eyes once, and what you saw didn’t match the reflection. The man you were supposed to marry couldn’t even look at you, even if you cleaned and cleaned and cleaned until your fingerprints turned white and pasty.

Because what it all came down to was simple. You never got to become the person you envisioned. Instead, you were cursed to live as a blank slate and be consistently reminded of what you were supposed to be and of who you were: no one.

Tommy exhaled in a quick huff, pressing his forehead to yours so that he saw you clearer, without all the tension and bullshit in the way.

“Here it comes, Tommy.” You took a shaky breath. “I love you, but I could never be the perfect wife to you, and I would be a terrible mother.”

There, in all its ugly colors and shades, you hung yourself with the truth.

He shook his head as if he too couldn’t believe your words.

“Fuck’s sake! Forget about all that." His eyes watered out of frustration, but he was still puffing in anger. “I need you. You. Not some whore.”

You bit your lip to muffle the god-forsaken cry ready to erupt from the volcanoes you suddenly found roaring in your stomach. An earthquake overtook your hands the more you fought the inevitable eruption. You grabbed both his hands to stop yours from shaking.

“I have to be cursed; there’s no other way!”

“No!”

“My life slips through my fingers like grains of sand—”

“You’re not cursed!”

“And I can’t stop it, Tommy!”

“You’re not fucking cursed, and I’ll tell you why." Tommy cut you off. He leaned in, licking his lips, which had turned dry from all the shouting, and squeezed your hands. “Because my ancestors charmed dogs with their magic, they didn’t scare little girls with curses,” he paused. “But you… You waved a hand over my head, and now I’m no better than a dog.”

He closed the space between you, pressing his forehead against yours, and stroked both your cheeks, wiping at your tears. You held him there in a meek attempt at reciprocation.

You wished the world were ending so then you could grab Tommy’s hand and say, ‘I’m ready, Tom. The world is ending, so let’s kiss and love each other under the flames without any fear because the world is ending.’

But you were never good at expressing yourself with words, so you sealed it with a kiss, hoping he could taste the unspoken words on your lips the same way you tasted the tears. He responded in earnest, gripping you roughly by the scruff of your neck to seal the promise laden between your lips; no more running.

-

It was just your luck that you would bump into your ex-fiancé, William, while visiting a bar in London with Ada. You were buzzing from the warmth of three sweet liquors and whatever else Ada insisted you try, and everything was starting to seem a little funny by the time he approached you.

He engaged in pleasantries, swishing his wine around the glass and sniffing it occasionally, like many pompous older men tended to do. There was only so much smiling you could afford before you caught your reflection in the freshly wiped bar and realized how poorly your acting skills were. Ada was no help, muttering something about finding a phonebooth and then slipping into the belated and boozed crowd. It was then that the supposed nectar in your glass began to taste like the cleaning products—that nose-scrunching stench. Thankfully, William was too involved in some tangent to notice you muffle a gag into your palm.

The dazzling hum in your ears muffled out all his words. In your drunken state, William appeared to be more confident than what you remembered, but you were unable to decipher whether it was from a change of heart or if he was trying to fall back in your good graces. Otherwise, you were blinded by the roaring bustle of the bar and the delicious swell of music that seemed to reverberate across your being.

Growing a little bored with William’s story, your attention wandered over his shoulder, still being sure to nod every now and then as if you were deeply pondering his words. Not far away from his side, a man seemed to linger—a man who was careful not to reach your eye. You must have laughed a little harder than usual because William turned sharply to the man at his side, gave him a quick once-over, then returned his attention to you, but by then it was too late, and you knew exactly what William’s relationship was with this man and where William’s confidence had come from.

“You’ll make a fine wife and a finer mother someday,” William quickly added.

You cursed the witch inside you, who laughed from her stomach and used his shoulder to steady herself. Once upon a time, that was all you longed to hear, but now, with a half-spilt martini in hand, you couldn’t care less. Both of you had found happiness despite your unconventional circumstances, and there was no more to it. You could close that chapter without any loose threads.

A little drunk, you thanked him, disappeared, and never thought of him again.

-

“I can’t do it, Ada,” you stressed, beginning to feel uncomfortable with the baby in your arms.

Motherhood came rumbling into your life like a rusty engine spitting out oil. ‘Instinctual’, the mothers down the lane from Arrow House had said, ‘it’s like your body has been preparing for it your whole life.’ How awful, you thought, and by the time one of them finished speaking about their experience with their first, your nose was so scrunched in disgust that you would need an iron to flatten out the wrinkles. It wasn’t until now that you longed to be in their shoes, because nothing came naturally to you.

“He’ll latch eventually; he’s just a little fussy,” Ada reassured.

“Is it supposed to hurt?”

“It’s perfectly normal.”

Then, after an hour of rubbing your sons back on the verge of tears, he finally began feeding from you. Ada soothed your back the whole time and cooed softly to calm both you and your unruly boy. Sometimes she brought Karl. He would obediently sit on her lap, playing with his wooden horse, while your little Charles fussed.

One time in the early morning, when you were up attempting to feed Charles, Tommy rushed in alert with disheveled hair and sunken eyes.

“Sorry,” you mouthed, deflated your hardworking husband had been disturbed from his sleep.

He ran his hands over his face and sighed. You mistook his action for frustration and desperately tried to hush your baby. Tommy moved over to the rocking chair where you sat, trying to feed little Charles in your arms.

“Don’t be sorry,” he whispered into the crook of your neck. “How is he?”

You flushed under the moonlight, suddenly embarrassed that your husband had caught you in this vulnerable position with the top of your slip peeled down. Your exposed skin hissed when he pressed a kiss against your pulse.

“I don’t think he likes me very much.”

Tommy inhaled sharply against your neck before resting his chin on your shoulder to peer down at Charles. Charles had settled since Tommy walked into the room, acutely aware of his father as his little hands made a grabbing motion for him. Diligently, Tommy relieved your arms of Charles and cradled him close to his chest. Within minutes, the little baby was gurgling happily and blinking in a way that suggested sleep was on the horizon after all.

Your husband didn’t dare make any sudden noise as he gently set Charles in his cradle. Once he was surely asleep, Tommy guided you up from the rocking chair and into your shared bedroom.

“See?” you hissed, still maintaining a soft voice, “he only wants you.”

Tommy wouldn’t hear any of it, pulling you into his arms as he sat on the edge of the mattress. Your slip was still pooled around your hips, so he took the opportunity to plant a kiss above your breasts, where your heart was.

“He loves you,” he drawled in that husky voice of his. “I know he does because I do.”

Your head ached, but you couldn’t help the way your body reacted to his words and touch. Tommy’s wandering hands teased the silk fabric that clung to your hips as you felt his nose trail down to your breast, where he kissed one of your aching nipples delicately. Suddenly hot, you hummed in delight, the back of his shorn scalp pleasant beneath your nails. A grunt, bathed in that musk of his devours your senses. Inhaling sharply, he took the bud between his full lips, sucking, licking, and nibbling gently while his hands explored further down. Your head lulled back from the pleasure, gasping and withering under his skilled tongue.

The next thing you knew, Tommy was tugging the rest of your silk slip off and reminding you of just how much he loved you.

-

“Charles! Come here!” Tommy called.

Your little boy loved to play in the backyard of Arrow House. Much like his father, Charles adored horses. Big ones, small ones, black ones, white ones—but most of all, he favored his Shetland pony. Tommy had brought it for Charles before he could even walk. He said something about it being important for his son to be raised around horses from a young age. And while you didn’t necessarily disagree, it still stressed you out to hold your baby so close to such a large, muscular animal. You knew the Arabian breeds spooked easily, so you steered clear of them and were able to keep Tommy and Charles happy.

But now he had grown up so fast and was able to run around on his own two legs, climb trees, and bruise his knees on the way down. The sun beat lovingly on the apples of his cheeks as he dirtied his trousers, kneeling by the fence to feed his Shetland (affectionately named Biscuit) hand-picked grass through the gaps.

“Charles! We’re leaving!” You called when he ignored his father.

Stubbornly, Charles spun around to pout his lip and cross his arms. He glared at you as threateningly as a five-year-old could. You bit your lip to hide your smile because he really did look like a little Tommy with those big blue eyes. It would only be a matter of time before he perfected his father’s stare. With a sigh, you shifted your daughter into Tommy’s arms before approaching Charles, who was picking angrily at the grass.

You reached a hand out toward him, "let's go.”

“No!”

“All right,” you said decisively, spinning around, “Ruby will have all the fun then.”

“No!” cried your little boy.

You stuck a hand up in surrender and started walking back to Tommy. “No, it’s all right.”

“No, no no no!” Came his protest, chasing behind you as the gravel crunched beneath his boots.

You paid no attention to him, keeping your eyes trained ahead, silently relieved that your ploy worked. Tommy watched on in amusement while Ruby suckled on her thumb, curiously watching her brother storm closer.

“You hear that, Ruby? We’re going to spoil you,” a short smile played on Tommy’s face as he adjusted her so that she sat comfortably on his hip.

“And me!” Charles added and gave his best pout.

“No, Charles, you said you didn’t want to go,” you reminded him, raising your eyebrows.

“I do! I do!”

“Hmm,” you thought aloud, and held a finger to your chin while looking to the sky in exaggerated contemplation. “Very well, but only if you get in daddy’s car right this instant.”

He climbed into the backseat of the Bentley without further fuss.

When all the bags were neatly packed in the back for the day’s festivities, Tommy came around your side to sit Ruby on your lap. Quickly, he leaned in to kiss you and pinch your cheek, which swelled into a glowing grin.

He smiled back and whispered low enough for only you to hear, “got him wrapped around your finger, eh?”

You laughed. “Him and a few other Shelby’s I know of.”

-

The thundering sound of music could be heard from outside the theater on the corner of Old Pauls. Inside, patrons mused between champagne, dancing, and making a display of their wealth by bidding on little trinkets. It was one of the many charity galas Tommy had to attend because of his new move into politics. Usually, you enjoyed dressing for those sorts of things, but tonight you simply weren’t feeling up to it. Maybe it was the drape of your dress not sitting right or the new leather shoes that still needed breaking in.

Your shimmering smile faded into the crowd as you snuck through the back door in your satin bordeaux dress. Old Pauls sat perched above the cemetery it was named after. Conveniently across the street from the buzz of the theater, it was airily quiet and stuck out from the rest of industrial Birmingham. Your heels clacked across the pavement as you wandered up and down the garden, glimpsing at stone angels and silver plaques. All you had to light your path were the streetlights and the moon.

Your diamond wedding ring twinkled under the stars as you stopped to trace a name. It was the same as your mother's, but with a different last name. Still, you always wondered what happened to her. Had she gotten married to another man and taken his name? You expected to shiver at the idea, but you found that thinking of her no longer unnerved you. She packed up the title of mother when she left you all alone in that cramped house.

Light spilled out onto the pavement across the street when the entrance to the theater swung open. A few men flew down the steps and split off in different directions. Thinking it odd, you remained crouched until they disappeared around their respective corners. That’s when you saw Tommy exit through the same doors, throwing a cigarette and wiping at his brow while he looked up and down the street. Quickly, you stood and waved your arm to get his attention. When he noticed, he stormed down the steps and stalked across the street and through the gates of Old Pauls over to you.

“I needed some air,” you spoke up before he could get a word in.

His eyes wildly flickered back and forth from yours in a frenzy. Under the moonlight, they looked almost translucent, and, save for a ghost of blue, his pupils were wide.

“Why the bloody hell are you out here, eh?” He demanded, gently shaking your head between his hands for emphasis while his eyebrows rose expectantly.

“It’s quieter.”

When he tilted his head to the sky and exhaled, your stomach dropped at the sight of blood. Your ears, which had been tuning out the music, flinched when a shrill cry from a woman rang out the theater doors. The music was gone, now replaced with screams as all the patrons rushed out, tripping over each other like it were a race. You turned back to Tommy, now as worried as the others.

“What the hell happened? Are you hurt?” You urged, gripping his white collar, now red, to inspect where the blood was coming from.

“Not mine,” he cleared his throat, grabbing the hand on his collar to tug you down the street.

The frame of your world stretched a little wider, like light pouring in through open shutters. Car doors slammed, and drivers honked at the agitated crowd who ran this way and that across the road.

“Where’s the fucking ambulance?” Shouted a man who took no care to avoid bumping into you.

You stumbled back, your hand slipping from Tommy’s on impact. Rage flickered across his features briefly, having noticed the man push through you, but he reconnected your hands and continued walking fast. When he reached the Bentley, he urged you inside, holding your hand the whole way until you were seated in the passenger seat.

“What the hell happened, Tommy?” You repeated as he slid into the driver’s seat.

“Someone got shot.”

Your eyes widened. “Are Polly and—”

“They’re fine.”

You sank back into your seat as the engine roared to life. Peaky Blinder’s followed the frenzied crowd, moving together like a pack of wolves onto the streets. They only parted to let Tommy’s Bentley through. Out the window, people were fighting and throwing fists as they all tried to escape the mayhem.

“Why aren’t they letting people through?” You asked after witnessing a Peaky Blinder block the road and refuse to let a car pass.

“Doesn’t matter.”

He never told you anything when it came to business. And although you suspected this was much more than the doing of the Shelby brothers, Tommy’s face never betrayed him. Simply put, if he didn’t want you to know, you wouldn’t.

“Would anyone want to follow us?”

“No.” He exhaled deeply, cleared his throat, and then reached to give your thigh a squeeze.

You knew it was a lie when his eyebrows rose. He only did that when he was worried. Your tongue remained pressed to the back of your teeth the entire ride home.

-

The howl of the wind whistled down into the valley of the gypsy camp Tommy had brought you and the children to.

“Pack your things,” he had said one night after storming through the front door of Arrow House, “we’re going on a trip.”

Charles and Ruby cheered, but you suspected something sinister beneath his intentions.

So, there you were, picking at the grass by your feet while you perched on the bottom step of the gypsy wagon Tommy parked beneath a tree for shade. He kept quiet for most of the ride, absorbed in leading the horse around loose gravel and stones, or rather, he led you to believe he was lost in concentration. Because, when it came down to it, you knew Tommy better than to assume nothing was wrong.

The past week, he had been acting different, jumpy even. He ran into the nursery during the early hours of the morning on edge, as if expecting something to be amiss. You tried interrogating him, but he brushed it off, insisting things were fine. Fine—you began detesting that word. Fine this, fine that, but if things were really fine, then why was he on edge?

Then came the bloodshot eyes and the slamming of his desk drawer when you entered the office. Only this time he couldn’t deny the unmistakable jingle of a bullet, which rattled in the wooden compartment like some sort of airy death chime.

A black hand. One for each Shelby. And since you were now one too, that meant neither you nor the children were subjected to any special treatment. A week, he said, a week for his family to clear up the business while he stayed here watching over you like a shepherd to his flock.

And watched he did, standing next to where you sat, he found peace observing Charles and Ruby as they chased each other around the overgrown field. There he remained for an hour or so, frighteningly still, the only motion being his sharp jaw chewing on a mint leaf, somewhat reminiscent of the soldier in your tent all those years ago. Next to him, tied to the tree, the black steed filled the silence with snorts and grazed favorably on the loose roots and grass patches.

“Ruby was crying this morning. She’s scared, Tom." You sighed.

Tommy hadn’t been there when you woke up that morning in the caravan. He returned shortly after, ominous as ever, just as Ruby had begun to settle.

He tossed the stalk of his mint leaf into the grass and offered you his hand. You looked up at him in question for a moment, slightly suspicious of his intentions. Nevertheless, you slid your hand into his, and he stood you up, sat down on the higher step, and pulled you between his legs to sit on the lower step. He hugged you from behind as he slouched to rest his head on your shoulder, then exhaled deeply.

“We will be home soon,” he whispered in your ear, brushing your knuckles tenderly.

“For how long? Until we get another bullet in the post?”

Tommy’s throbbing forehead found solace in the warmth of your neck.

“You’ve never been one to run,” you continued, “what’s bothering you? We took a vow that we would share everything.”

He nuzzled his nose deeper into your pulse.

Frustrated, you tried to get up, but he held you firmly against his chest.

“Italians.”

“Italians?”

“Italians sent the black hands.”

You waited in silence for more information, but more did not come.

“Speak to me, Thomas.”

“I don’t want you any more involved than you are.”

“They’ve sent death knocking on our door; how more involved could I be?”

Tommy moved methodically, licking his lips and clearing his throat. He squinted his eyes up at the glaring sun.

“It’s nothing you should be concerned about. I’ll keep us safe.”

“Nothing I should be concerned over, Thomas? Just how many people are we at war with?”

He didn’t answer, so you turned your head away from him. Charles and Ruby had since settled by a patch of flowers. Charles was crouched over, helping his sister gather all the yellow flowers for her yellow dress.

The tension broke the surface then.

“Why are you still fighting, Tom? Is this,” you nod to your children and breathe in the fresh air, “not enough?”

You pictured Arrow House and its lavish garden, one to compete with all the wealthy families down the lane. You thought of Arthur, John, Polly, Ada, and all his family that lived to see his success. Everything, from the thoroughbreds in the stable to the fancy cars. The money itself was a testimony to his drive. What more could the gangster of Birmingham want when he already had everything?

You had gone and worked yourself up now because the world seemed blurrier than before.

Tommy, still on his guard, guided your chin to your shoulder so he could kiss the tears away. “It is enough.”

“Then make it enough. You’re respectable now, so stop the fighting.” Your voice broke at the end.

He hung his forehead on your shoulder. Like a flower sheltered away from the sun, Tommy wilted when he was away from his business. Usually, you were a strong enough light to keep him going, but whatever business he had gotten himself into was poisoning him, and ever the addicted flower, he kept running out to the fields, continuing to drink in the sunlight until it was too much and turned his leaves brow. Because business was what occupied his mind day and night, he was unable to turn the cogs of the engine off and let the air out of the tires.

A hand brushes your hair away to kiss the spot beneath your ear, airing out the destructive thoughts.

God, you loved him anyway. An overpowering feeling that ruled over calculating minds like Tommy’s and faint hearts like yours. You were no better than him—both addicted to a little sunlight.

-

The framed photographs on the wall shook as your third-eldest slammed the door to her room closed.

“I hate you!” She cried from the other side.

Your husband, Tommy, sighed to the ceiling, then stalked past you to his study, no longer interested in anything your daughter had to say. They had been at it for the last ten minutes arguing over some boy she was seeing, and your ears were just about ringing having witnessed it from the sidelines. You were left there in the hallway, an unwilling participant in the unspoken feud between father and daughter, and you understood that whoever you went to console would take it that you were siding with them, even though you just wanted to keep your family together.

Going to your daughter was the instinctive answer, but you knew she needed time to cool off. Tommy was the only reasonable choice.

You knocked on the door to his office before letting yourself in.

“Come to lick my wounds, eh?” He mused while smoking a cigarette.

Your lips wormed into a thin line. “This needs to stop, Tom.”

“Yeah,” he said, tapping the ash into his tray, “it will fucking stop.” He points with his cigarette, “I’ll make it fucking stop.”

You sighed. “You know that’s not what I meant.”

The chair screeched as he stood. “I’m her father, and if I say she can’t see that boy, she can’t. It’s only a childish fling; she’ll get over it.”

He poured a whiskey and downed it by the time you walked around his desk so that you were face-to-face with him.

“They’re in love, Tommy.”

“Yeah?” He scoffed. “Well, that can be undone.”

You held his glare, a challenge lighting in your own. “So easily, you think?”

He paused mid-drag, catching onto the underlying meaning in your words. “No,” he said, setting the cigarette down in the ash tray and grabbing your shoulders. “Don’t act like that.”

“Act like what?”

“Like you’re threatening our love over some fucking boy that’s charmed our daughter. They’re too young.”

“He’s sweet.”

“Oh, sweet and nice, I’m sure. But he’ll have no place in this house.”

“Why?”

“Why? Because I fucking said so!” He spat.

“Don’t yell at me.”

“Or what? You’ll leave me?” He huffed in amusement. “You won't; you love me too much.”

“You’re so certain?”

He paused for a moment and stared at you as if he couldn’t believe what you had said.

“Yeah, because we still fuck like two people who love each other, eh? And you’ve not told me no before, so if the day comes and your body no longer wants mine, then I’ll be worried. But until then, don’t test me with empty threats." His face hardened.

He knew you like the back of his hand. All bark, no bite. You loved him inexplicably, even after all these years, gray hairs and all. His face, body, and soul nourished you until you were satiated and full. And even if his eyebrows furrowed at times, you were willing to bet that it was for aesthetic, a shapely shadow gathered over the years from being the stoic leader the Peaky Blinders and Shelby family needed. How could you fault him for it?

Because, at the end of the day, you were a team. Even if he played the role of an overprotective father a bit too convincingly, he only ever wanted what was good for your daughter. Everything he worked for, ultimately, was for his family. A family man. And that came with its virtues and vices because, despite what Tommy thought, he wasn’t perfect; no one was.

Shrinking under his hands, you breathed a sigh and appeased him. “End this feud, Tom. Find peace with her. I don’t care what you do, but by the end of it, I expect to be able to sit down at the dinner table without having to beg my husband and daughter to look up from their plates.” You stroked his hands, which held your shoulders, and finally blinked up at him.

A haze of softness swept across his glare and melted the glaciers to a thin sheen of blue. The seams of exhaustion frayed one by one through his muscles. He nodded, licked his lips, and leaned down for a kiss of absolution. Not entirely prepared to surrender, you tilted your head so that he found the corner of your mouth instead.

“It will be done, love.” He brushed the apples of your cheeks tenderly. “And by tonight,” his voice lowered, “I promise you’ll forget all about it.”

Only then did you accept his kiss, eager to put the grievance to rest. Tommy, on the other hand, had other plans and stepped forward so that you were pinned between his desk and hips. He quickly began to gather your skirts above your waist, but you pulled away just as fast at the hiss of air against your exposed skin. An unsolicited gasp escaped his mouth when your knee brushed him there, and you sucked your bottom lip between your teeth, looking deep into his eyes.

“Promise me you won’t break her heart. She might not be old enough now, but I don’t want you to put her off love forever,” you caressed his jaw.

“No,” he agreed, breathier than usual, flexing the hands that were still caught up in the fabric of your skirt.

“And our Daisy may never say it, but I know she loves you dearly. So please, Tom, be gentle with her. I don’t want her to grow up despising you. Tell her you love her, kiss her forehead, hug her.”

He deflated, and you watched him swallow his pride. Cogs turned against the sweltering lust, threatening to deplete the clever thoughts in that powerful head of his in favor of your careful touch. Please, please, please, you begged without uttering a word; agree with me on this, Tom.

Tommy leaned back down to rest his forehead on yours; his face gave nothing away. You were sure he had found something to say, which would make you feel like a fool for asking. However, when you embraced those faint subtleties of emotion flickering across his face like candlelight, so miniscule you might blink and miss it, you found nothing of the sort to suggest any hostile nature. Because Tommy loved you.

“I will.”

-

A/N: Tried doing a long one shot, what does everyone think? Yay or nay? Comment to be added to the tag list!

Taglist: @maliceofwonderland , @fairytale07 , @goblinjnr , @ilovepeoplesdads , @multidimensionalslut

[wtfsteveharrington]

my pretty little brain has been…. focused on cockwarming with carmy lately.

afab!reader, unprotected sex, fingering, cockwarming (obviously). basically you love your boyfriend & he loves every inch of you too.

carmy coming home after a long morning of doing interviews (which he hates frankly but he was forced into it for the sake of publicity for the bear) and he finds you in the bed. you were 'asleep' - aka you heard him come in and purposely pulled the blanket down your body, leaving your back exposed to your boyfriend. typically he'd shower, change, and be curled up behind you within 20 minutes of coming home. it had become an easy routine to settle into.

while sure you had chores to do, errands to run, but the sun was shining in through your windows and made the bed look so warm, so inviting. you told yourself just twenty minutes of napping before getting back to your tasks but here you are over an hour later and carmy certainly isn't complaining.

instead you hear his dress shoes being kicked off and scattering across the floor, the heavy sound of his pants and belt hitting the ground next. you're groggy but slowly waking up to the change in environment. he should shower - he should. but he walks around the bed to face you, clad in just a pair of tight briefs that have you half convinced this is a wet dream and drops to his knees. elbows on the edge of the bed, fingers tracing along your cheekbones. "you 'wake?" to which you just groan but bring your hand up to cup the backside of his hand on your face. "can be if you need me to."

to which carmy beams at you. being loved by you was the greatest joy he's gotten from life so far. he presses a kiss to your head and quickly makes his way to the bathroom to wash off the morning. you had chastised him one too many times for getting stains on the sheets or making the bed smell like whatever the tasting menu was that week for him to hop right in.

he's good at learning.

and the shower is quick. he takes time to scrub his scalp clean and wash his hair well because he knows how much you like to play with it. he wants it to feel clean and soft for you. they put some gel in it for the news that made it feel too stiff - he knows you'd hate it.

it doesn't take long before he's back in the bedroom and throwing the towel that was around his waist into the overloaded laundry basket in the corner. you're still sunk into the bed but this time flat on your back. your own hands rubbing at your legs, the oversized and cliche shirt you got on your last vacation with carmy pooling at your hips as your knees come up for him. you knew what he was after by waking you up. "wanted to get up and put on something prettier for you, carmy. couldn't do it."

he laughs. tries to keep it soft to not disrupt you but there's only so much he can hold back. there you laid in this cliche “cheese curd capital of the world” shirt he picked out as a joke while you guys drove through wisconsin on your aforementioned road trip. he loved it, loved the memories associated with it.

"look gorgeous, baby. you alway look gorgeous." the bed's dipping at your feet as carmen kneels on it, his lips coming down to start trailing kisses along one of your calves while one of his hands cups the back of your other. rough hands that have such a tender touch when it comes to you. your knees are falling open further under his warmth, drops of water landing on your skin from his still damp hair. "you're gonna get the pillows all wet."

he lets out a breathy laugh once again, this time the sound quieted against your skin. "i'll wash the sheets before we go to bed. just need you now." you hum as his lips work their way up to your inner thigh, carmen alternating between kissing and sucking at your delicate skin. "thought about you all day. kept answering the same damn questions over and over and all i could think about between ‘em was how much i’d rather be right here."

you let your head roll back against the soft pillow, grabbing fistfuls of the sheets under you when you feel carmen's breath even higher on your thigh. he’s taking his time while you’re losing your mind. "y'already woke me back up, don't tease me too please." he's humming against your skin, "not teasing, just savoring."

the drag of the sheets along his length is giving him just enough friction to keep him stimulated as he kisses the cotton covering your core. your hands finally tangle into his wet hair, keeping him in place as he licks the material. his eyes are heavy with the exhaustion of the day but he just needs you. the facade he had to wear during press wore him down.

there's fingers hooking into the waistband of your underwear as he drags them off of your body, tossing them into the pile of his long forgotten work clothes. a problem for later tonight as well. carmen leans back, eyes dragging along your form. you can’t help but admire him too - your boyfriend kneeling between your legs. he smells like your body wash and you giggle to yourself knowing he must have mixed them up in the haste to get to you. his toned figure, the tattoos you’ve memorized covering his skin. the way his eyes look when he stares at you and his wet curls against his forehead. “look so pretty, carmy.”

carmen’s blushing from the attention. giving you a smile the pushes his cheeks up to his eyes. “thank you.” taking your compliment, letting it soak in. you feel two fingers drag along your folds, a thumb pressed to your clit as he slips one in shortly after the other. "just wanna be buried in you and go to sleep. you okay with that? promise i'll fuck you real well tonight." which has you nodding pathetically, hands clutching at his forearm.

he's slowly dragging his fingers out of you, keeping them crooked to take as much of your wetness as he can to glide along his length. carmen’s shuffling closer to you while pumping into his own fist, whimpering as the head of his cock bumps into your core. he lines up the length of himself between your folds, rutting against you. “carmen.” a warning.

the bed squeaks below the two of you as carmen leans over your body. his elbow next to your head, lips capturing yours in a kiss as he lines himself up. your legs go tight around his waist with your hands coming around his torso, fingertips pressing into the muscles while carmen slides inch by inch into you.

you’re both moaning into the kiss while you arch your hips up to encourage him to sink in faster. you discovered this awhile ago - carmen getting lost in you to help his mind turn off. it was almost embarrassing the first time you two woke up after a nap still connected, both still aroused. now it happened regularly. both of you love feeling needed.

he’s pulling away to kiss down your jaw before nuzzling your neck, “feels so fuckin’ good. hate being away from you, ‘specially like this.” pulling your body up against his as he carefully rolls the two of you to the side. it’s not graceful to stay connected but you two make it work.

pressed chest to chest, your leg hooked around his waist while he stays buried inside of you. his lips are working your jaw again, his eyelashes fluttering against your cheek. your eyes are getting heavy again. the sensation of being so full and so loved lulling you back into a comfortable headspace. “love you, carm.”

carmen kisses you on the lips again, “love you so much more.” he’s reaching behind his back to pull the forgotten blankets around your combined bodies. making sure the two of you were tucked in and comfortable before pulling you as close as possible and letting his mind finally relax enough to drift off to sleep.

[stevenose]

wax and wane (18+)

an interlude

contains: gender unspecified reader; reader with a vagina; shy!reader; pining; handjobs; fingering

your costume is inoffensive. you were only going to robin’s, anyway, with the promise of horror movies and candy and takeout and a sleepover. but you feel steve’s eyes on you, the way your white silken shirt shows off your neck.

“an angel?” eddie had laughed when you walked in. you’d already felt hot, catching steve’s eyes across the kitchen.

now your legs are crossed neatly and politely under your white pleated skirt. the fabric of robin’s couch digs into your thighs and you shift uncomfortably. you also shift at steve’s attention, sitting across from you on the floor. he’s dressed as some guy from a movie you’ve never seen, but he looks incredible. a black blazer hugs his biceps, sunglasses sitting pretty on the bridge of his nose while everyone scoffs at him to take them off. they’re all the way down at the tip of his nose, though, watching you rather than the tv screen.

you catch steve’s hand trailing down to rest on his lap. you look away before anyone notices. a minute later, you can’t help yourself, and you take another glance at him.

the heel of his palm presses into his crotch. the screen darkens, shading his face, and you feel your heart beating in your throat as his eyes don’t leave yours. you have to force your gaze away again, feeling hot, squeezing your thighs together.

he excuses himself not long after, heading towards the bathroom. you’re not sure if you’re supposed to follow, but you don’t. your ass stays glued to the couch and you try so hard to listen to eddie’s quips and nancy’s shushes and not about steve jerking himself off.

the party - if you can even call it that - ends at one, despite eddie’s protests. you’re exhausted, pulling your clothes off in robin’s bedroom while she changes into her pajamas behind you.

“hey, did you notice anything about steve?”

your brows furrow and your stomach drops. “what?”

“didn’t he seem weird to you?”

you lick your lips and grab your pajamas, trying to stay nonchalant as you slip the cotton over your head. “i didn’t really notice.”

“he was quiet,” she says to herself. “whatever. i’ll talk to him tomorrow.”

you turn to face her, pajama bottoms in your clammy palms. “isn’t he sleeping with you tonight?” he usually does.

robin snorts, almost tripping while struggling to put her shorts on. “we’re all sleeping in the living room. that’s why it’s a sleepover.”

you’re never getting away from his prying eyes. you gnaw on your lip and turn away again. “oh.”

“do you want my bed?” she asks. “i know there’s not a lot of space out there.”

“no,” you say, absentminded. “there’s two couches and a recliner, right? we just have to get to them before the boys do.”

and you do, somehow, fall asleep, head resting on a pillow on the same scratchy couch you sat on earlier. you sleep until four, waking up with sleepy eyes and a full bladder. it’s a minefield walking through the living room, trying to be quiet and not step on someone, including steve. he rests sweetly, an angel in his own right, soft brown hair falling over his freckled forehead.

you stay in the bathroom a while. sleepovers were never your strong suit. and you can’t stop thinking about steve, about his hand wrapped around his cock in this bathroom, while you sat helpless just a few feet away from him. sweat beads at your hairline and you wipe it away. with a sigh, you turn off the light and open the door, nearly shouting at steve’s presence on the other side.

“sorry,” he rushes, lifting his hands. “i didn’t know —“

“it’s okay,” you whisper. your heartbeat doesn’t slow. “are you okay?”

“yeah,” he whispers. his voice his deep with sleep. “just - checking on you.”

“oh,” you say dumbly.

neither of you move. your eyes adjust to the dark, the dim nightlight in the bathroom aiding your vision. he’s so beautiful when he’s rested, so soft.

his hands find your arms and he gently pushes you back into the bathroom, making sure to quietly shut the door and lock it before pressing his lips to yours. you squeak, both in relief and surprise - surprise that he touches you like this, his friends in the other room, while you’re all unkempt. still, you seize it, wrapping your fingers through his hair while he tugs you closer.

“miss you,” he breathes. he always says that, like he can’t do anything about it.

“missed you, too.”

he grins against your mouth. “you just saying that?”

you shake your head. his lips kiss down your neck and you shiver, hands grasping at his old hawkins high tee. “what were - what were you d-doing earlier?”

steve’s tongue laves against your skin. “when?”

it takes you a moment to remember what you were saying. “in the living room, when - your - you were, you know.”

his teeth gently bite you. “can’t help myself anymore.”

you moan, breathless. your hands clutch his shirt harder. “don’t.”

he pulls away, eyes soft, apologetic. “i’m sorry.”

you shake your head. “don’t - when you say stuff like that i get all….”

he smiles softly. “i drive you crazy.”

you laugh. “yeah.”

“you drive me crazy, too.”

his fingers tickle when they make their way up your thigh. “you looked so pretty tonight. did you do that for me?”

“maybe,” you whisper, his hands trailing higher.

he chuckles, his hand finding your ass and groping it. you gasp, pushing into him, feeling how hard he is in his gym shorts.

“for the record, i didn’t touch myself,” he whispers against your lips. “just had to wait it out for a little, that’s all.”

“okay.”

steve pulls away a little and bites his cheek. “should i have?”

you shake your head, hands shaking. “i want to help.”

he sighs dreamily. “wanna help you, too.”

steve helps you sit on the counter, helps you get off your pants and underwear before his thumb finds your clit. you gasp loudly and he tsks.

“you gotta be quiet for me, okay? it’d be rude to wake everyone up.”

it’s an impossible task, but you’ll try for him. your hand moves down to palm at his cock while he works on you, and you see his eyes roll back.

“jesus.”

“be quiet,” you repeat.

“don’t get smart with me, baby.”

he’s joking but it makes you tense up and he feels it. he doesn’t get to bask it in for long, your hand gently gripping his erection. he groans softly. “here, let me—“

and his cock is free, heavy and soft and leaking in your palm. you’re not sure what you’re doing, but you know it hurts if he’s dry. you bring your hand to your mouth and spit, watching him for any disgust. his breath gets heavier instead, so you slowly move your hand down to his cock, gently jerking him off.

“oh my god,” steve huffs, his forehead pressed against yours. “oh my god.”

kindly, his fingers work harder on your clit, applying pressure and evening his pace. he matches yours, nice and slow, easy.

“you’re so wet.”

“have been,” you whisper. “all night.”

“sh-shoulda told me. could’ve helped. christ, angel, forgot how tight you are.”

his finger dips towards your cunt and you gasp as he pushes the tip of it in. distracted, your hand moves faster, and steve bites down on your shoulder to stop himself from shouting.

“jesus christ, sp-spit again, honey, need it.”

so you do, twice, making sure it’s enough before continuing. steve shudders and you groan as he presses his finger in slowly, one hand flat on the counter beside you.

you watch him with wide eyed amazement. he’s so gorgeous with his eyes shut tight, the veins in his neck gently flexing, throat bobbing as he swallows. you’re lost in it, in the fullness of his finger sinking in deep, his thumb swiping lazily across your clit.

“oh my god,” you whisper.

steve slips his finger out and bring it to his lips, sucking your wetness off of it.

“oh my god,” you repeat, and in your haze you’ve brought him in closer, hand moving fast on his swollen dick, his hips fucking into your fist — and then the head of it kisses your clit.

you both gasp. you’ve never felt that before, and steve hasn’t, either. never didn’t use a condom. you pull back and freeze, eyes wide and locked on each other.

“i’m sorry,” he finally says, voice hoarse.

“i did it,” you rush out. “i’m sorry, i - i got distracted.”

but it felt good. so good, so dirty, and steve doesn’t move away, just stares at you. so you swipe his cock against your clit again and this time, you don’t stop.

steve groans again, both hands on the counter, knuckles white. he presses his forehead against yours. “shit, oh — we — have t-to be careful-!”

“are you going to cum?”

“holy shit,” he gasps, rutting his hips. “say that again.”

“a-are you going to cum?”

he breathes through his teeth, big hands coming to rest on your spread thighs. he grips them tight, bruising. “oh, god, yes — i have - have to-“

he suddenly reaches past you, grabbing a washcloth and pulling away from you. he moves to jerk himself off, but you swat his hand away and continue, looking up at him with shiny eyes until he cums into the cloth, biting his knuckle, legs shaking.

steve has to grab your wrist to make you stop, overstimulated and spent. sweat drips from his forehead as his chest heaves. you look at him expectantly, scared you’ve crossed a boundary. if those even exist anymore.

“your turn,” he finally pants, kneeling. “been waiting to taste you again.”

your head falls back in ecstasy, hands tangling in his hair once again as his tongue flicks eagerly against your clit. it doesn’t take long before you unravel, fueled by the depravity of it all. you gasp and moan into your palm, but steve’s louder, even muffled by your cunt. he continues until you’re shaking and whimpering before standing again on his own wobbly legs.

“oh my god,” you whisper, smoothing his shirt down.

“i missed you,” he says again.

you repeat it, pushing his hair away from his face.

“um,” he finally says. “you can - clean up first.”

“okay,” you say, entranced by him. you don’t want to let him go.

he grins. “okay.”

face hot, you let him leave, and slip past him again on your way back to the couch. you’ve never slept harder.

[writeonwhiskey]

the skz house: ch 23 (chan pov)

a/n: thank you @bahablastplz for editing! i really loved writing from chan's pov. i hope you all enjoy this one!!

[ read chapter 22 here ]

Chapter Twenty-Three: Of You

You haven’t spoken to me in days.

A few months ago, this wouldn’t have bothered me at all. I would have been fine with it. I would have preferred it. Here I am now, silently pleading with you at the table to look at me. But you don’t. And it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said those things to you the other night. I shouldn’t have fucked you like that.

Seeing you hurt as a direct result of my actions has never been easy to accept. In the beginning I brushed it off as being necessary. After you bulldozed through the walls I had up, though, it felt impossible to reassemble them. I’m Humpty fucking Dumpty over here.  

Should I have sent you away when you showed up at our house? Lee Know was in charge of the applicants, so I was floored seeing you walk in behind Seungmin that day. If I’d seen you amongst the candidates beforehand, I would have rejected it...maybe. I would have at least been able to spare you of the bullshit I put you through then, and again now. It’s unfair to you. I know it is.

But once you were here, I didn’t want you to leave. I pushed you away because I needed you to make the choice to go—I’m too selfish when it comes to you, I learned that quickly. I’ve never felt this way about anything before and I honestly don’t know how to cope with it. I feel whole when I’m with you in general, I feel invincible when I’m fucking you…how can this possibly be wrong?

Now I’m left hanging on to the tiniest of threads that connect us and I’m trying not to cling too hard for fear that it will snap from all the weight I bear in this. The thought of losing you terrifies me. And I know it’s inevitable.

I attempt to talk to you after dinner when I see you in the hallway. I want to apologize for my actions, but you cut me off.

“Don’t be. You’re right. We should want to do this and I’m going to give it a try.”

I feel consumed with rage at your words. I want to lash out and scream or punch a hole through the goddamn wall. But I don’t. I let you go.

I have to let you go.  

On Sunday when you come to my room to grab your sheets, you don’t say anything. I deserve it though, don’t I? If I hadn’t taken that trip with you my father wouldn’t have grown suspicious. I wouldn’t have to give you up for the next two weeks when I already have so little time left with you. If I hadn’t opened up to you, this wouldn’t be so hard on both of us. And on top of all that, I’m the one who told you we should be open to this first. I’m reaping what I’ve sown.

Allie comes in a little while later to put her sheets on your bed. The sight of them there doesn’t look right. Neither does she.

I watch as she moves around my room, oblivious to my mood and making small talk. I’m responsive…I think.  I will myself to feel some kind of emotion while looking at her—even if it’s just lust. She’s pretty, I could be attracted to her. If I call her over to my bed right now, she’d come. I could fuck her…but I don’t want to.

My ears perk up when she says she wants to spend the first night with me. As much as I want to object, I don’t. I can’t, really.

After dinner, I quickly shower and get into my own bed with the lights off before she returns. I can’t fall asleep, though. I’m thinking about you. Who are you staying with tonight? Are you sleeping in their bed?

I’m still wide awake when she comes back in, wearing just a towel. I can’t even be bothered to take a gander.

It disturbs me.

She shouldn’t be here. 

“Chan? Are you asleep?” she calls out into the darkness.

I remain silent and still. I hear her change into her pajamas and climb in her—your—bed, and finally feel relaxed enough to actually try falling asleep.

She stays with Hyunjin for the next three days and it feels like a relief. I’d rather be alone. But…being alone, with my thoughts does little to help me. I can’t stop thinking about you. What are you doing? Is Seungmin being good to you?

As fucked up as my mental and emotional state are, on Jeongin’s birthday I can’t keep being a recluse. He’ll be offended if I don’t show up for a little while, at least. So, I join the others in the basement for drinks and karaoke. Drinking to drown my sorrows is not something I enjoy, but tonight I want to. Especially since Allie will be in my room. I don’t want to do anything I might regret—but have you?

I’m one drink deep by the time you come in with Changbin. You seem happy. He offers to get you a drink, which I don’t mind. Then he calls you his girl. Which I do mind.

At that, I finish what’s left in my cup and give myself another heavy-handed pour of whiskey to replenish it. Have you fucked him? I wonder. The thought makes me feel sick to my stomach. I can’t help but feel selfish. In this fucked up situation, I know none of these guys would do anything to intentionally harm you. I know you’re in good hands, but…fuck. I don’t want anyone else on this entire planet to have you.

As the night carries on, everyone’s having a good time and I’m sulking in the corner like a toddler that’s been forced to share his favorite toy. I don’t know how else to feel right now. I am used to seeing you be flirtatious with Hyunjin. Seeing you cuddled up to Changbin on the couch, though, makes me want to snatch you away from him and claim you in front of everyone. But I can’t.

I can’t even be mad at him. He means well. And when he gets up to perform, I’m left smiling at his antics. I couldn’t seriously hate any of them, even if you are involved. I’ve known them for too long. These are my brothers. At the end of everything, they’re the ones who will be with me the rest of my life. Not you.

“Chan-hyung!”

I’m ripped form my confuddled thoughts when Jeongin says my name. I immediately shake my head—I’m not in the mood.

“For my birthday,” he adds. “Stop being boring and old.”

I frown at that.

Then Lee Know is marching towards me, grabbing me by the arm, and pulling me to the other room. I don’t put up too much of a fight—I’m old and boring, after all.

“For your birthday,” I look pointedly at Jeongin to which he beams back at me. “What do you wanna hear?”

“That new song you were finishing up last week,” he says.

“No, not that,” I shake my head.

For my music production minor, I’ve been spending more time in the studio than usual. There’s no better way to get my feelings and frustrations out than through music. Tortured artist and all that.

“Yes, that. It’s my birthday.”

He’s really milking this birthday thing. He connects his phone to the speaker, and I silently curse myself for having sent him the song. Everything I’ve done lately has come back to slap me in the face.

The melody starts to play, and I let out a sigh, trying to shake my troublesome thoughts and get into performance mode. I turn to face the TV; I can’t look at you while I sing this.

“Got so many questions, you seek information. No need to be desperate, we’re just getting started.”

I started writing this song before we even took our trip, but only just booked the studio time to record it. The lyrics cut deeper now than when I originally wrote them. They reveal the way I’ve felt about you. The way I still feel about you.

This is bad, isn’t it?

Do you hate it?

Are you repulsed after the way I treated you?

As I continue singing, I turn around to face everyone. My eyes find you first. You seem taken aback—it’s understandable.

“Locked in sight, we’re in trouble. A lock and a key making rumbles. I know you want me, don’t crumble.”

I avert my gaze before the next lyrics. Looking at you and singing them will make me crumble. But I mean every single word. I never thought I’d meet someone that feels so perfect for me. Why did it have to be like this?

When the song is over, I pass the mic to Rhiannon and retreat back to the bar. You’re performing now. You’re smiling and happy…all the things I wish I could make you. But I can’t. I’m not allowed to. Not for real anyways.

My eyes are so focused on you that I don’t notice Allie until she’s snapping her fingers in front of my face.

“Earth to Chan—you okay?” she places a hand on my shoulder.

“I’m good,” I say, sitting up straight and drinking from my cup.

She’s standing between my legs. Again, I will myself to feel something…anything. Maybe not unbridled attraction, but at least a desire to fuck her. It doesn’t happen. I raise a hand to her waist to test it out, but it doesn’t feel right. I could kiss her right now, get it over with.

“I have class at 8 so I’m gonna head up. You coming?”

I shrug, dropping my hand from her waist.

“Come on,” she says, sliding her hand down my arm to my wrist.

I let her pull me off the chair and up the stairs with her. I guess I could go to my room with her. I probably should.

So, I do. I follow her up the steps, her hand still holding my wrist. We get to my room, and she shuts the door behind us.

“I’m gonna shower first,” I say, in hopes the steam will clear my mind up.

She releases my wrist and I retreat to my bathroom.

I should fuck her. I really should. Even though I don’t feel physically attracted to her, I can think of you to make my dick hard. Then I can fuck her and get you out of my head. I can end this turmoil.

The shower does little to make me feel better. Nothing can make me feel better.

Except you.

I spend far longer than necessary in there and when I get out, I’ve lost all conviction to sleep with her. As I re-enter my room, I’m hoping and praying that she has fallen asleep.

She hasn’t.

“Get some rest…I’m gonna go make a snack.”

“I can make you something,” she offers, pushing the sheets back.

“No, it’s okay—thank you, though. Go to sleep.”

She nods and pulls the blankets back over her.

Downstairs, I sit down on the couch and turn the TV on. I’m not even hungry. I just didn’t want to be in my room with her. I’ve never felt so hung up on someone before, it leaves me at a loss of what to do. If I fuck her, it would only be to help myself move on from you. I’m just not convinced it would work. And I’d hate myself after for it. But have you already moved on? The thought keeps plaguing me.

I remain in place, rooted to the couch, as the others start to file out of the basement. First Han and Charlotte, then Lee Know, then comes Changbin…and you.

He’s drunk. He has one arm slung over your shoulder, and both of yours are wrapped around his waist to support him. You help him up the stairs without so much as a glance in my direction. What are you going to do up there? I want to go up there after you, but I can’t.

The sounds coming from the TV start to annoy me. I mute it and stare blankly at the moving images. I don’t know how much time passes in silence. My attention is drawn to the stairs at the sound of footsteps coming down.

It’s you.

You immediately look away from me and proceed into the kitchen. I shouldn’t follow you. But I’m up and off the couch before I can stop myself. I’m drawn to wherever you are. I’m a magnet and you’re my true north.

With every step I take towards you the voice in my head—my father’s voice—is telling me to stop and turn around and I hate it. I hate that voice. I hate that it wants to steal the one piece of unadulterated happiness I’ve felt in years. You feel like bliss. You feel like hope.

He threatened to make you leave. I swear to God I nearly fucking broke right then and there. He can yell and berate me all he wants, but to threaten to take you away before our time is up? Out of the question. I put up a front, acted nonchalant about you.

‘She doesn’t mean anything, Appa.’

 Lie.

You mean everything.

When I enter the kitchen, you’re grabbing water bottles from the pantry. I don’t have a plan, but I know I need to be near you, so I walk over to the pantry and wait for you to turn around.

The second your eyes land on me, all traces of feeling confused and lost leave my body. I’m found. My body is filled with the purest warmth, and I have to touch you to get more of it. I have to have you. You avert your eyes to the water bottles in your hand and I feel a pain in my chest.

“Why are you doing this to me?” I ask, placing a hand on your waist and pulling you towards me.

It’s an unfair question. You don’t know this inward battle I’ve been fighting since you showed up here. But I don’t know what else to say. It’s less of a question and more of a plea, really.

“I’m not doing anything,” you say softly. “I’m just…existing.”

“That’s all it takes, honestly,” I reply.  

“Chan,” you whisper, shaking your head, eyes still on the water bottles.

You won’t look up at me. Why won’t you look at me? I need you to look at me.

I take a few steps back from the pantry and bring you with me. This is the most I’ve touched you in a week. I’m not letting you go. I hold your waist with one hand and use the other to grab the water bottles, two by two, from your hand and set them on the counter before returning my attention to you.

“I feel like I’m in shambles when I’m away from you,” I admit, hooking a finger under your chin, forcing you to look up at me.

“You’re drunk,” you say, trying to push me away.

I hold on to you tighter, standing my ground.

“I miss you.”

You close your eyes and sigh, shaking your head again. You don’t believe me?

“You can’t.”

“But I do.” I say, bending down to nuzzle my face into your neck.

If you push me away again, I’ll take that as a sign. If you’ve made up your mind, I’ll have to live with it.

I wait for it, but it doesn’t happen.

Instead, you wrap your arms around my neck and pull me closer to you. I take in a deep breath and feel the stars align as the familiar smell of your skin ensnares my senses.

My hand leaves your waist and trails up your back, into your hair. I grab a handful of it and tug back on it. You look up at me with those soft fucking doe eyes that make my insides melt. The complete and utter trust you have in me. I can see it.

I smash my lips against yours, maybe too hard, but I don’t care. I want you. I fucking miss you.

You don’t hesitate to kiss me back, just as passionately. Do you miss me too?

I grab you by the waist and hoist you up on the counter as we kiss. My hands fumble at the waistband of your pajama bottoms. I want you so bad. Why am I nervous? And then, you’re helping me, leaning back and lifting your hips to push them down. I pull them off and toss them on the floor beside us. I scoot you to the edge of the counter and lower myself to my knees.

You tangle your hands in my hair as I rub my nose along your slit, inhaling my favorite scent. You smell so good, baby girl. I use my tongue on you next, needing to have you with all my senses. You throw your head back and let out a quiet whimper as I continue to fill myself with what I’ve been deprived of. What I don’t want to go without.

You.

My hands grip your thighs and as I’m licking, lapping, fucking you with my tongue, the emotions I so desperately willed myself to experience earlier surface. And I know then. I know I’m done for. How can I willingly give this up?

I stand from my knees and pull you off the counter, covering your mouth with mine again.

Do you like the way you taste on me? Your moan says yes.

“My cock throbs every time I see you, y/n,” I tell you, breaking the kiss as I turn you around, groping your breasts over your t-shirt. Your head falls back against my shoulder and litter the side of your neck with kisses. I pull you against me and press my hips against yours. I want you to feel how hard I am. How hard you make me. I could come in my pants right now, without even fucking you.

I’m helpless when it comes to you. Can’t you see that?

“Tell me to stop,” I plead, resting my cheek on yours and thrusting my hips against you again.

You shake your head and lean over on the counter, poking your ass out at me. You’re such a good fucking girl. I slap your ass with the palm of my hand, watching as it jiggles in the dimly lit kitchen. I grab a hand full of it, squeezing tightly.

I push my shorts and boxers down and grab my cock with one hand, holding your hips steady with the other. I rub my cock up and down your slit, groaning at how wet you are. Your pussy is always so wet and ready for me. Do you need me just as much as I need you?

“Every time before I fuck you,” I say, teasing your opening as you moan, “I tell myself I can live without it.”

I ease myself inside of you and we both let out the biggest sigh of relief at the same time.

“But I can’t,” I continue, slowly withdrawing. “I fucking can’t.”

I thrust myself back inside of you with as much force as I can and all hell breaks loose.

I realize the precarious situation we’re in. In the kitchen. But I could not care any less. My cock is home inside of you. This is where I’m supposed to be. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.  

I keep thrusting into you and you fuck me back. You want me just as much as I want you, don’t you? But do you need me like I need you? I can’t ask you that, so I just fuck you harder instead. It’s not healthy to communicate this way, but I can’t bring myself to say these desperate words to you. You take each thrust of my hips without running away and I love it. I fucking love—

No. No. I can’t.

The sound of your hushed moans, combined with the knowledge that we could be caught at any second, have all of my nerves standing at attention. You grip the edges of the counter as I grip your waist, pulling you back against me as hard as I can.

Mine.

Right now, I don’t care if you’ve fucked Seungmin or Changbin or both. They can’t hold a candle to what we have when we’re together like this. That much I’m certain of.

You’re mine, y/n.

You stand on your tiptoes and arch your back. I grit my teeth, and squeeze my eyes shut, trying to shake off my release. I need more. But even with my eyes closed, I can picture how you look in front of me. I have every curve of your body memorized; do you know that? The dimples on your back that I love pressing my thumbs into when I grip your hips. The thought makes me growl as I pummel into you harder and faster.

You’re perfect. I need you to know that. With every thrust, every grunt, every moan. I need you to know.

“Chan,” I hear you say and my eyes snap open.

I see your hand buried between your legs, rubbing your clit and working yourself to an orgasm.

Yes. Please, baby girl. Come on my cock.

I feel your pussy, my pussy, clench around my cock as your legs start to shake and I let myself go too; thrusting into you with reckless abandon as I come.

I’m convinced there’s no better feeling in the world.

I’m glad you stayed.

I’m glad I didn’t see your name on the list before you showed up.

Your legs continue to quiver as I lay myself across your back, leaving my cock inside of you.

I don’t want to move.

I don’t want you to leave me.

[ read chapter 24 here ]

a/n: HOW ARE WE FEELING, MY LOVES? poor baby chan is stuck between a rock and a (constantly) hard place. i am so so so excited to hear your thoughts.

[roostersbby69]

Fresh starts

Summary: After leaving your abusive ex husband with your two kids. Tackling motherhood by yourself is a challenge. Getting to know a certain neighbor might lift some of the weight off of your shoulders.

Warnings: Swearing, drinking

Masterlist | Next part

“Mommy,” A tiny voice echoed in your head as you were still drugged by sleep, “Mommy, wake up.” Tiny hands pushed at your shoulders causing you to come to. Your eyes opened finally and your body jolted when your son’s face was inches away from yours. “Weston,” you blinked as you checked your phone. The light made your eyes water as you read the time on the screen, “It’s four in the morning. What’s wrong baby?”

His little, sleepy eyes blinked slowly at you as his lip pouted. “I had a scary dream. I sleep with you, mommy?” Sighing in sympathy, you nodded softly and helped him under the covers. He snuggled into your pillow and pushed his stuffed dinosaur onto his plump cheek.

The boys shared a room currently. After going through a rough patch with your ex husband, you decided to move houses and not even a week in the boys slept on a mattress beside their boxed up bed frame. You felt helpless and terrible for not being prepared for them. Things just were so sudden, but you would figure it out.

Staring down at your sleeping son, you rubbed your finger along the back of his head. He slowly began to fall asleep. Eventually, so did you.

-

“Charlie, where is your coat?” You called through the house as you checked in the dryer for your other son’s lost coat. “It’s in my book bag!” He called from the bathroom as he brushed his teeth. You pursed your lips and walked to check his book bag which was on the table. The jacket was in fact not there. You sighed and grabbed a jacket from the dryer. You folded it into his bag before then zipped it up, again. A honk came from outside the front door and you hurried Charlie from the bathroom and handed him his lunch before slipping his backpack on his arms. “Have a wonderful day, sweetie.” You kissed his cheek and smiled as he groaned in embarrassment. He waved as he ran to the bus before the door shut. You waited until the bus drove off before slipping back inside your warm house.

“Come on, honey, let’s get you up.” you cooed as you rubbed Westons belly to wake him. He whined and stretched his legs out as you removed the sheets from his body. His face was red from warmth and his little eyes blinked open. When he saw your face he smiled and reached for you to grab him.

“Good morning, sweet boy.” You held him and kissed his cheek as you carried him into the bathroom. Currently you were trying to potty train him, but it wasn't very successful. “Weston, please just try to go.” You begged him as he sat on the toilet without trying to go. “No.” His little voice argued as he crossed his arms over his chest. You shoved your face in your hands and gave up. “Okay, let’s go get you ready for daycare.”

-

“Damn it.” You mumbled as you struggled to remove the showerhead from the boys bathroom. “Shit!” You cried out as your arms got tired and the screwdriver you were trying to pry the shower head off went flying across the bathroom. You groaned loudly and slumped against the shitty bathtub. You were never going to get the damn thing to work.

The doorbell rang causing you to sigh and slowly stand up from your spot on the floor. You made your way to the door and smoothed your hair down before opening the screen door to see your ex husband with Weston in his arms. “Hi, honeybunch.” You smiled and took him from his dad’s arms. “Conner.” You side eyed him. “Y/n,” he grumbled back, “Look, i’ve got a business trip this weekend so you’re going to have to keep them.”

Your face dropped as you stared at him stunned, “You had a trip last weekend, Conner, the kids want to see you.” Weston whined in your arms as you readjusted him on your hip. “You’re the mother, Y/n, figure it out. I can’t help that I’m good at my job.” he scoffed as he walked off towards his car.

“Piece of shit.” You mumbled as you walked into the house and slammed it closed.

You set Weston down on his play mat with some of his toys as you made your way into the bathroom again to tackle the shower head again. You walked inside to get sprayed in the face by water spewing out of the head. “Fuck!” You screamed as you noticed the walls and tile were soaked with the water. You ran to turn it off while squinting your eyes from the aggressive water that spewed out of the faucets. It finally turned off and you sat on your knees with a loud groan. Your hair and clothes were now soaked, great, just what you needed to end your day.

Stirring the green beans on the stove, you listened to Charlie go on about his day at school. “And then, Bella fell off the swing so we had to call her parents and she went home.” He explained.

“Oh no, I hope she’s okay.” You scrunched your eyebrows as you check on the cornbread in the oven. Taking it out with a rag, you set it on the stove to let it cool and grabbed a couple of plates from a cardboard box along with a couple of forks and cups.

“Here you go, baby.” You handed your kids their plates. They thanked you and started eating their food as you smiled and watched them, satisfied. Tonight was a simple dinner, green beans with cornbread and baked chicken. Something simple for the first week in the house. The kids seemed to enjoy it, so you weren't complaining.

Bath time was always a hassle. Charlie was now at the age where he took showers by himself and Weston was still little, so you bathed him. After a bath, you put the kids to bed and gave them each a kiss on the cheek.

“Mama,” Charlie whispered through his comforter. “Yes, baby?” You smoothed his wet hair down and smiled at him. “Are you and dad mad at each other?” This broke your heart, you told yourself you would try your hardest to not bring them into what was happening between you and their dad. You shook your head softly, “No, me and dad just don’t agree on the same things. And that happens a lot with grown ups. It isn’t your fault, baby.” You reassured him. He nodded. “Don’t worry about it, get some sleep, honey.” You kissed him one last time before cutting on their night light and heading out of the room quietly.

Sinking down into the steaming water, you sighed and felt your muscles relaxing. A nice bath is what everyone needs after a long day. Especially the one you’ve had. You loved your kids, but it’s hard taking care of two boys on your own. Finally relaxing, you suddenly heard loud music and shouting coming from outside. Fearing your children would wake up, you sprang out of the bath and wrapped a towel on your soaking body. You ran out of the house, barefoot and turned your head into the direction of the noise. Two houses down, a house with the lights on at 11:00 at night was blaring music. On the back patio there were people laughing and drinking just having a grand time.

Quickly, you ran to the house and beat on the door multiple times until someone answered. “Hey, hey, Shit!” A voice yelled as the door swung open. A tall man with a mustache answered the door with a beer in his hand. “Is there a problem, officer?” He teased. He saw your soaking frame that was dripping on his front porch and your hair that was tied up into a bun on top of your hair.

“Yes, there is. I would appreciate it if you turned the music down a little bit. There are people trying to sleep.” You pulled the towel up further on your chest, angrily.

He took a swig of his beer, not being able to hold back his smirk, “Looks like you aren’t one of them.”

This made your face redden, maybe a mixture of anger and embarrassment as you had stormed out of your bath practically naked in front of a stranger. “Turn it down, please.” You rolled your eyes before turning around and making your way down the street.

“Yeah I’ll turn it down! Just as soon as you tell me your name!” He called as he chased after you.

“My name?” You raised an eyebrow at him in disgust.

“Yeah, like your name. Betty, Lucy?”

You scoffed, “What are those the names of girls you’ve fucked in the last week?”

“No. I was just starting off.” He chuckled.

“Okay,” you nodded your head in amusement, “I've got names coming off the top of my head. Y/n is my name. Charlie is my oldest son’s name. Weston is my youngest son’s name. Conner is my ex-husband's name. And Zach is the sheriff i'll be calling if you don’t keep it the fuck down.” You turned around once again and began walking back towards your house.

Bradley smirked and Watched your ass in the towel as you walked away, “That’s a beautiful name!” He called out to you. “Y/n.” He whispered under his breath as he watched you walk into a house before he turned around back to his own.

“Brad! Where ‘ya been?” Hangman asked with a smile as he threw his arm over his friend’s shoulder.

“You’ll never believe it. A chick in a towel just showed up at the door.” He nudged a thumb back to the front door.

Hangman’s eyes widened like a teenage boy as he ran to the window to take a look. “Bull shit, you liar.” He turned around in defeat, wanting to see the so-called ‘chick in towel’.

“If I’m a liar then I’m dead, because I just saw an angel.” Bradley shook his head dreamily before taking a sip of his beer again.

—————————————————————

[pablitogavii]

Gavi wanting yn to play with his hair please

There for you always

I could never understand why he needed to hate me so much. Ever since Aurora introduced us, Pablo found a reason to mock and tease me about every little thing.

During the festival in Sevilla, I was the only girl he didn't compliment and say my dress is beautiful. I felt like an outsider whenever he was there..

During Aurora's birthday, it was no different. He greeted all of her friends but when it came to me he just said underneath his breath "you again" and moved away. I want to know what I did to deserve him treating me this way.

"Ignore him amiga! He probably has a secret crush on you!" Aurora once said to me long ago and I felt my heart skip a beat..what hurt the most is the fact that I liked Pablo..a lot..and with time I think I began loving him too.

Gavira family asked me to look after their family home in Barcelona while they are away on a trip to United States and I agreed making sure their plants are watered and their house stays clean.

Pablo didn't know I was staying there, so when he showed up one night unannounced finding me in the living room curled up in a ball he sighed carrying me to bed.

I woke up in a guest room confused only to find him in the kitchen making breakfast for himself before his practice.

"P..Pablo? Did..did you carry me to bed?" I asked shyly but he was having the same stern face as always.

"You should learn to lock the door before falling asleep, enana" he said and I sighed nodding my head and walking to make myself a cup of morning coffee. Something in my stomach was fluttering thinking of Pablo carrying me to bed..it wasn't the first time he showed his sweet side to me.

One time when I came to watch his game with Aurora and the rest of her friends, he noticed goosebumps on my arms putting his jacket over my shoulders without a word..when I said thank you, he told me to start carrying my own jackets. Somehow he always needed to ruin the moment with his rudeness.

I accidentally ran into him thinking about it spilling some coffee on the floor and making him groan loudly.

"Dios! You're so clumsy! And all over all the damn time!" he sounded angry and I felt my heart hurt.

He didn't want me here and it was his house..I apologized starting to clean the floor but he placed his hand on mine taking the towel and cleaning it himself asking if I got burnt. I said no.

"Good. Just sit and I'll make you coffee. You can have some breakfast if you want too" he said and I smiled nodding and taking a bit of his toast while he finished it all up.

"Thank you Pablo.." I said when he sat down and he started eating his eggs while being on his phone. It didn't matter that he was cold when he gave me at least some of his warmth..it's all I needed.

"Are you going to uni today?" he asked after packing and getting ready to leave for training.

"I don't have classes this week, so I'll be here if you want me to make some lunch?" I wanted to be nice feeling my cheeks blush at the thought of having this "domestic" life with Pablo.

"No, I'm good. Bye" he said and I nodded knowing that would be the answer.

"Bye Pablo. Have a good training." I said and he left to his black Audi outside as I watched him leave from the window not knowing that he was thinking similar thoughts as me in that moment..us two..living together..like a real life couple.

It was barely evening when Aurora called me and I put my book away.

"Hey, amiga! How is US?" I asked but her voice was nervous and scared.

"Y/n! Thank God you answered! Could you get Pablo home from training? He's not feeling well, they said it's a high fever?" she said and I felt panicked jumping up and calling an uber to the sport center.

"I'm here to pick up Pablo Gavi..I'm his.." I said to the man at the front door being interrupted by Pablo's tired voice as he tossed his keys to me.

"Try not to crash my car! Let's go." he said and I nodded seeing that he was very pale and there was wet sweat on his forehead.

"I can give you some pain medication when we get home.." I spoke seeing him hold onto his head as he leaned on the door while I drove with rain pouring all around us.

" I don't need your help! You're not my damn girlfriend!" he said bitterly and I swallowed nodding my head and staying silent for the rest of the night. He was right..I am nobody to him..so I just left him alone for the rest of the night when we got home.

When I was about to go to bed, I secretly checked on Pablo who seemed to be sleeping in his room. Just as I was about to fall deep sleep, I heart him yelling in pain from his room.

I ran to him opening the door seeing him tossing and turning and holding onto his head. His hair was all wet from seat and he was shaking. I sat on the bed shaking him awake.

"Pablo! Please, wake up" I said and he opened his eyes breathing heavily and staring at my eyes deeply.

"Y/n..it..hurts" he said and I nodded touching his face which to my surprise he let me scared of how hot he was underneath my touch. His fever wasn't breaking!

"Pablo, you're burning up! Let me get you cold compress" I was about to move away but he wouldn't let me grabbing my hand rather roughly and pulling me back.

"Don't go..please don't leave me..I'm scared y/n..and I need you" he said and I felt my heart beating fast at those words..I wanted him to say them for so long and now he did..he needs me and doesn't want me to go.

"I'm not going to leave you Pabs..I promise..I'm just going to bring you some more medicine and something to help lower your fever okay?" I said touching his face again and he looked at me as a scared child nodding his head.

"Promise me you'll come back to me?" he said and I smiled. Never did Pablo ask for reassurance before..it was special.

"I promise.." I said and he smiled letting me rush downstairs to grab everything. When I returned, I helped him take another pill before touching his face with cold compress towel. He was shaking violently and I added blanket on top of him.

"it should start working soon Pabs.." I said gently removing the cold compress and he sighed.

"I'm so cold.." he said and I looked around but there was no more blankets in his room.

"Do you want me to go grab my blanket?" I said and he shook his head reaching for me pulling my waist closer as I was reaching over him hearing him whisper to me.

"Come here...please..only you can warm me up" he spoke and I felt. a-shiver move down my spine in that moment..he wanted me to lay down next to him?

"Pabs I don't.." I started but his arms held on tighter pulling me until I was on top of him our face inches apart.

"Please.." he spoke his hot breath fanning over my face making me blush bright red.

"Okay..okay I'm right here" I said laying next him underneath the covers while he quickly got on top of me laying his head on my chest moving until he got comfortable and I tried to control my heart from beating too fast in that moment.

"You're okay..I'm here" I said feeling him shaking so I started playing with his hair which seemed to calm him down a bit as he rested comfortably on top of my chest. When I thought he was sleeping, I stopped but quickly he looked up eyes watery and cheeks red from his fever..he looked so adorable in that moment.

"Y/n.." his lips were grazing mine and I froze "don't stop playing with my hair..please" he said looking at my lips but not daring to kiss them.

"Okay.."I said continuing to play with his curls but this time he just kept looking slowly moving to nuzzle his face into neck which made me shiver. He smelled my skin leaving a few wet kisses and I just let him laying back with my eyes closed. He doesn't know what he is doing..he's in delirium.

"You smell so good enana..and your skin is so soft on my lips..I wanted to taste you for so long.." he spoke and I couldn't believe his words in this moment..this couldn't be real.

"Pablo..I'm not your girlfriend" I said reminding him of his own words and his hold tightened like he was afraid of losing me.

"Are you someone's girlfriend?" he said and I felt my cheeks blushing. Was he really jealous right now??

"No..but.." I said but couldn't finish as he started kissing down towards my chest touching them and coming as far as kissing my stomach looking up into my eyes.

"Be mine enana..please forgive me for being rude to you, but I couldn't say that I like you" he spoke closing his eyes and kissing my hard nipples which made me moan lightly.

"Why..not?" I said and he looked up returning to my neck and leaving a few marks before touching my face and staring into my eyes.

"Because I'm an idiot..but I want you...need you" he said resting his sweaty forehead against mine and I blushed smiling which made him lean down and finally place his hungry lips onto mine.

We kissed for long few minutes until I pulled away making him lay back down onto my chest so he can get some well deserved rest. His nose was buried in my neck and his hand holding onto my breast possessively..it was a sight to see.

"Mine.." he would murmur from time to time until he finally fell asleep and I did as well resting my head against his own.

We got woken up by my mobile moving a little but he kept his head on top of my chest. I answered Aurora who started asking about Pablo making me embarrassed and nervous..I couldn't exactly tell her that I was in bed with her brother right now..

"yeah Rora he's fine now..you have a good days" I spoke while Pablo was purposefully kissing my neck pecking my lips from time to time while I gave him a warning glare. The his mom jumped on call making him smirk and start to kiss down my chest again.

"Thank you so much for caring for him, querida! I hope he didn't give you trouble?" Belen asked and Pablo smirked looking up at me while I blushed avoiding his eyes in embarrassment.

"No..he was very nice to me so no worries señora" I answered fighting an urge to moan as Pablo started sucking onto my tit waiting for me to finally hang up and be with him only.

"Tell him to call when he wakes up" she added before we hung up and I touched Pablo's hair making him look up and return to kiss my lips passionately.

"You're crazy!" I said and he smiled nodding his head and cuddling into me.

"How are you feeling?" I asked playing with his hair and he nodded holding me tightly.

"Much better..with my girl playing with my hair..and not leaving me when I needed her" he said and I smiled kissing the top of his head.

"I will never leave you Pabs..I promise" I said and he nodded closing his eyes wanting to get some more rest never feeling safer than in my arms.

This was real...I was his girl now<3

[voxsmistress]

Mama Didn't Raise No Bimbo - Part Sixteen!

Hello my gorgeous little demons - I am so sorry this took so long to post! These past few weeks have been hell at work! But never fear, I will always get to writing when I can!

Now ... we've had Voxie's turn, it's Valentino's now ;)

Part One / Part Two / Part Three / Part Four / Part Five / Part Six / Part Seven / Part Eight / Part Nine / Part Ten / Part Eleven / Part Twelve / Part Thirteen / Part Fourteen / Part Fifteen / Part Sixteen Trigger Warnings: Sexual themes, no under 18's allowed, sexual shenanigans, second time writing smut (be kind), Val being his usual sarcastic self!

A few days had passed since your little tryst with Vox, and you were slightly embarrassed that the next day after you basically had to spend it all in bed to recover after your late evening with the Overlord. Even more embarrassed when Velvette came to check up on you and ended up laughing her head off when she realised what was going on. Valentino was a little nicer – and by a little you meant he didn’t laugh … straight away.

Anyway, after that one day of recovering you were then back to work, focusing on your social media and the upcoming catwalk for Velvette. Your songs were chosen, outfits being made and all that was left was practicing where and when you were going to sing, prance and walk. And by practice you meant again, and again and again until you had to tell Velvette if she kept making you sing over and over your voice would be in tatters for the show. Did you think she was going to give you a break after that? Your voice, yes. Your body, nope. You were made to walk up and down that catwalk, pose in various (idiotic) poses and dance your way back down the catwalk. Safe to say you were absolutely shattered.

Which is why you were currently lying down on the pink chaise lounge in Velvette’s studio; going over paperwork, the last few outfit designs for the other demons and whether any song choices would work better than the ones you had. Velvette was sat beside you, one hand tapping away on her phone and the other one running her fingers through your hair, tugging on the few tangles that were there making sure you were paying attention and not falling asleep which you were apt to do. What could you say, you loved people playing with your hair.

A grumble and a huff from her stopped you from adjusting the one outfit design and instead to look up at her to see a pissed off look on her face. What has happened now?

“You okay there, babe?” Checking on her, you sit up properly as she shakes her phone annoyed.

“That stupid piss baby is blowing up all our phones having a tantrum, like we have time to deal with his dramatics. Vox is busy which means I am going to have to deal with him and I have a hundred different things to do and I just- “ Turning her phone while she ranted so you can see the masses of messages from Valentino you hold back a sigh. He’d been so good recently it was easy to forget that he was the most dramatic out of the three of them (which if you considered how dramatic they all are is an achievement in itself!)

“Sweets don’t worry, I’ll go and chat with him you keep working on what you need to do” you stand from your seat stretching your back which was aching from being laid funny for so long. Vel argued for a few moments before relenting and passing you your phone from the table, popping a quick kiss on her cheek as you walk round her you wiggle your fingers in a goodbye gesture. Entering the elevator you pressed the button for Valentino’s floor. A quick scroll on your phone you see the various messages from Valentino progressively getting more pissed off when no one was replying. Oops. Piss baby indeed.

A sharp ping distracted you from the messages, shoving your phone into your pocket you enter Valentino’s studio. Up till now you had only made a few trips to his studio, preferring the calmness of Vox’s office, or focusing on the clothes in Velvette’s – Val’s had a completely different vibe which sometimes put you on edge. A few steps into the room you could feel the energy was chaotic already. A Valentino shouting at the two pornstars on the stage was the reason why. Sighing under your breath you could easily see he wasn’t exactly as calm as you would have hoped. Well. Here goes nothing.

Walking towards the Overlord, you nod to a few of the demons who recognised you from around the tower and glared at the ones who give you a bit of attitude who obviously don’t realise who you were. They soon would. Coming to a stop at a ranting Val’s side you watch him snap a few directions at the actors with comments on how they could (should) improve. Before he could yell action, you link an arm through his while whispering up into his ear: “is that how you are going to direct me in bed?” His head twists round so fast his glasses nearly fly off, catching them you grin up at the shocked Overlord. Shocked is definitely better than shouting.

“My amorcito (little love), what are you doing here?” Slipping his glasses properly back on his face, you can’t help but chuckle at his question.

“You ask as if you weren’t blowing up all of our phones continuously for the past hour – I’ve come to check up on you”, as you explain one of his arms wraps around your waist to drag you around the side of his chair, so now you were in front of him.

“You came to check on little ol’ me? I am touched!” His other hand was cupping your face, fingers squeezing your cheeks a little harder than normal reminding you of his festering anger. Your own hand came up to rest on his wrist as you nod, his hand controlling how much movement you had which sent a small tingle up your spine. Okay you had definitely been spending way too much time with the Vee’s because when did you get that sort of kink?

He must have seen something in your expression as his own darkened with a sinister grin, his gold tooth flashing at you. Bringing another hand to your waist he hoisted you onto his lap like you weighed nothing, squeaking at the sudden movement you placed your hands on his arms to steady yourself. He had made sure to place you with your back against his chest and two of his arms stayed wrapped around your waist pressing you closer to him.

“If you want to keep me calm little one, I suggest you stay there and stay quiet, yes?” Agreeing you rested against his chest as he shouted at the actors to start again. Sitting there you kept quiet, but with how Valentino was sat you had the full show of what the actors were doing on the stage. Adverting your gaze, a flush started to raise up your neck to your cheeks more so when you couldn’t help but take a cheeky glance. How on hell do they stay in those positions without breaking a sweat? After a few minutes of that position, Val shouted for them to change. His hands rubbing up and down your waist as well as the scene in front of you was making the jeans you were wearing mighty uncomfortable.

Doing your best to ignore the urge the relieve the pressure, you hesitated before shifting on Valentino’s lap to try and stop the seam of your jeans pressing against your clit. Moving a bit too quick, a gasp escaped your lips as small burst of pleasure flashed through your body. A chuckle against your ear made the blush grow even more. Busted.

“Comfortable Princessa?” His hushed words into your ear made a shiver run down your spine. Another chuckle from him caused you to roll your eyes. Of course he was loving this. Ready to shove his arms away from your waist and storm out, a pair of red wings encasing your body stopped you in your tracks. You hadn’t seen his wings before.

“Now sit still and keep that pretty mouth of yours shut while daddy finishes his work”, you are ready to give him some sarcastic and harsh words, but a quick hand sneaked down the front of your jeans and underwear. Slipping a finger in between your wet lips gathering the wetness up and pressing harshly against your clit made any words you wanted to say to stay stuck in your throat. Gulping back the moan that wanted to escape, you clench your thighs together to try stop him from moving his fingers.

Tutting quietly into your ear, two hands easily push your thighs apart and hold them open while the hand that was down your jeans was alternating between circling your clit and dipping into your tight hole. “Now mi carño, that bratty attitude might work with Voxie, but not with me you understand?” Your concentration was gone with the fingers that were pushing you closer and closer to the edge making you whine under your breath when they came to a stop. Blinking up at him, his free hand wrapped around your neck harshly before giving you a small shake. “Are you that starved for attention little one that you have become dumb as soon as I touch you? I asked you a question!” He snarls down at you, swallowing a groan you try to rack your brains at what he asked you before. It was so hard to think while his fingers were working you so well and that hand around your neck was just helping push you closer to that edge. Bratty. Bratty attitude that was what he asked you.

“I understand Papi” you whisper, hiding your smirk at the dark expression he gave you. A finger driving deeper into you was your retribution for the snarky comment. Worth it. He yanked your body closer to his chest by the hand on your throat, keeping you plastered against him as his other hands kept your legs open and driving you higher and higher.

“Does it turn you on that we are doing this where anyone could see us Y/n? All it takes is for me to move my wings and anyone can see you unravel on my fingers” licking up your neck making a small moan escapes your lips.

“It does, but do you really want others to see me in that position? To see me fall apart at your hands when my reactions should only be reserved for you three Vee’s?” You turn your head to stare into his lensed glare. You knew you were playing with fire. Valentino was the most jealous and possessive of the three, but he was also the most unpredictable. A thrill ran through your body as he growled into your shoulder, biting down on it hard making you groan. Shit that hurt! Removing his teeth, you see his possessive bite mark on your shoulder. The sound he let out was almost a purr as he ran his tongue over the mark, his fingers moving quicker on your clit causing you to slam your head back into his chest and hold back the moans so only a few whimpers fell from your lips.

He laughed at you, shouting a few more orders and commands at the actors being completely at ease while you were falling apart at the seams. So close to the edge you dug your fingers into his arms, whimpers and moans escaping you more often now but you had stopped caring if the other demons could hear. You were so focused on the feeling coursing through your veins you couldn’t give a fuck if the rest of the room heard you scream.

Val did some sort of voodoo move with his fingers that had you cuming without even realising that you had not just hit the edge but had flown off it. The hand that was around your throat was now across your mouth muffling all the moans and shouts as Valentino shouted cut and for everyone to fuck off out of the room.

Twitching and twisting away from his fingers that continued moving, you shook your head at Val. It was too much. Too much. You tried to get your hands down your jeans to stop him, but they were caught by his own.

“My little chulito, you didn’t think I was finished with you yet, did you?”

Fuck!

Taglist:

@tasha-1994 @azullynxx @reath-solia @leathesimp @klorinda

@the-maladaptivedaydreamer @songbrita @midge7838 @joumi13 @wonderlandangelsposts @th3rizzler

@ace-spades-1 @iamferalfordilfs

@justgiulia @kittycatkrissa @qu1cks1lversb1tch @martinys-world @superwholatacohunters @mysticvoide

@rosiethevoxobesser

@skullhorn59 @sarcastic-sourwolf

@samanthastarss @hazbinz-vixxie

@shinynewboots

[hwaflms]

𐙚˙⋆.˚ nct 127 as 1d songs!

‧₊˚ 💭 ✩彡 , , 0.69k, fluff + slight suggestive + slight angst, just lil snippets of you and 127 with one direction songs, not my usual writing style, TELL ME UR FAV 1D TRACKS

♡ taeil . . . last first kiss

rainy days, soft smiles and soft kisses, nicknames, casual dates, putting away groceries, taking photos of things to show each other later, promises, painting dates, secret handshakes, prolonged stares, drawing each other, approving photos to post, kisses on the top of your head, karaoke nights, trying street food together, song recommendations, deep questions, laughing over some soju, denial and hesitation, splashing each other with wet hands

♡ taeyong . . . little things

LONG showers, buying clothes for you, matching jewellery, folders in your galleries for each other, perfume, long talks over tea, words of affirmation, flowers, crying in front of each other, wine nights, slow dancing, sending you reminders to eat, falling asleep over call, learning ukulele together, staying-in days, holding hands 99.99999% of the time, corny jokes, bike rides, playing video games, cutting fruit for each other, naps while it's raining outside

♡ johnny . . . she's not afraid

secret movie dates, drive-thru mcdonald’s, tight dresses, tousled hair, long video calls, subtle lock screens, orange-scented soap, sneaking out at night, drunken confessions, the two of you together in the background of every photo, watching scary shows, kissing in the dark, running, texting while in the same room, lying in his arms, windy nights, knowing each others favourite songs, screenshots, hushed whispers, road trips, dancing in the kitchen

♡ yuta . . . perfect

parties at 1 am, hailing taxis, long sloppy kisses, tucking hair behind each others ears, red bull cans, blasting music in the car, ice cream runs, eye contact, skinny dipping, cheap hotels, playing pool, texting late at night, beach walks, wind blowing in your face, meeting in secret, italian restaurants, thin cigarettes, messy sheets and hair, windows all the way down, knowing smiles, wearing his shirt at home, soft gasps, motel pools, cherry lip balm, getting tattoos together, getting kicked out of parties

♡ doyoung . . . half a heart

soft sweaters, missed calls, buying his detergent, matching rings, soft wispy clouds, two different kinds of juices in your fridge, puddles, picnic dates, mixed up socks, never deleting photos, the first text after an argument, books with notes in them, walks by the river, watching a show together, conversations in the dark, spontaneous coffee meet-ups, naming plants, museum visits, drives in the rain, saving memes about each other, empty lockets

♡ jaehyun . . . no control

stargazing, drinking on rooftops, meeting at parties, red cups, pool nights, lipstick stains, the smell of his perfume, oversized clothing, driving fast when the roads are empty, voice messages, morning kisses, private playlists, tinted taxis, looking for each other in a room, holding your hair back, strong coffee, silk pillowcases, clothes on the floor, selfies on each others phones, muffled moans, drunk tattoos, pinching his cheeks

♡ jungwoo . . . 18

amusement park dates, walks at night, letters on beige paper, photo booth pictures, ugly keychains, playing on the seesaw when the playgrounds empty, passing notes, keeping said notes, bracelets, having each other as your lock screen, messy beds, lists of baby names, knowing each other's favourite songs, extra toothbrushes, shampoo bottles, yearbook cutouts, shoebox filled with letters and trinkets, holding pinkies, random texts throughout the day, talking to his mom on the phone, long calls

♡ mark . . . i want to write you a song

pure innocent love, cafe dates, warm hugs, board games and hot chocolate, writing songs for you, sharing clothes, pecks while smiling, cookie recipes, said cookies ending up burnt, karaoke nights, acoustic guitars, writing desks, cheek kisses, grocery shopping, badly taken polaroids, long walks, late night conversations, photo albums, beanies when it's cold, holding hands under the table, wearing his glasses, breakfast in bed, bouquets, scarfs, walks along the sand

♡ haechan . . . temporary fix

stolen glances, smokey rooms, making out in the back of a taxi, moonlight, hair flying in the wind, playing footsie under the table, jealousy, talking on the phone late at night, eyes meeting across the room, drunken kisses, sitting on his lap, lots of 'are you awake?' texts, vodka sours, mirrored lense sunglasses, dyeing each other's hair, locking doors, lips on your neck, avoiding questions, stupid contact names, waking up in his clothes, empty wine bottles, bright sunsets, 10+ tiktoks and memes every morning, voice notes of him singing

[ilovebuckers5]

⁺˚⋆｡°✩needy✩°｡⋆˚⁺

kate martin x fem!reader

themes :

-fluff (if you squint your eyes)

-smut☺️

warnings :

-sexual content

-18+

it was the night that kate and her team would come back from the away game they had two days ago. me and kate weren't always in touch 24/7 while she was away which was actual hell for the both of us. we would only call once or twice a day and could only text a little bit throughout the trip. i spent most of my time taking care of our dog, macy. going on walks more than usual, going to dog parks things like that. since i didn't have my human version of a golden retriever i spent most of my time with our border collie.

every time i got a call from kate i would drop everything to answer. i would jump into my bed and kick my feet while she rambled on about how good she did and i of course would praise her since i watch all the games on tv. words can't even describe how much i need to hear her voice.

this away game was to indiana and kate claimed that there weren't many views she found enticing but she still sent me as many sky pictures as she could. she always try's to share wherever she's going with me. she's caring like that.

i got a call from kate this morning saying that she's finishing her packing. she even facetimed so that she could show me how organized her suitcase was. (it was not organized at all.) we called all the way until she had to get back on the road to get to the airport. the second she got in the car i heard taylor swift playing from the car speakers. enchanted to be specific.

"is that my favorite?" i squeal as i here the beginning of my favorite song ever.

"i forced them to play it baby" kate whispered back into her phone. "alright hun we are headed to the airport now i'll text you once i'm on the plane. i love you"

"i love you too" the words leave my mouth while an immediate feeling of loneliness lingered on my tongue. i hung up the phone and rolled over to see macy sitting next to me with her tongue out. she quickly got riled up as i poked at her floppy tongue.

we played around the apartment for a little while before i sat down to catch my breath. the amount of times i picked up my phone to check if kate texted or called was uncountable. i set my phone down after seeing that she hadn't reached out yet.

my eyes began to get heavier and as i was about to fall asleep i heard macy whining from across the apartment. without hesitation, i stood up and rushed over to where macy was which happened to be in me and kate's room. there my dog was rummaging through a small pile of kate's sweatshirts. i crouched down to the floor to pick up one of the jackets. i remembered that before kate left she asked me to wash this exact pile so thank you macy for reminding me.

after washing the sweatshirts i couldn't help but slip on one of them. it was my favorite after all. a tan-ish fleece sweater that felt perfect around my body. once the laundry was done i took the sweater and began hanging the others up in kate's closet.

------------------------------------------------------------

a couple hours had passed and kate already sent me a couple texts letting me know where she was and how she's doing. i was still in the sweater, cuddled up on the couch watching friends with macys head under my elbow. it honestly seemed like macy was more interested in the show than i was. i couldn't get kate out of my head. everytime my phone vibrated i would jump up to grab it off of my charger and see if my girlfriend texted me.

most away games are somewhat like this but this one felt different. as if the girls were out of state for more than a couple days. this felt like weeks without my girl. and let's just say that my attachment issues have gotten worse and worse everytime kate left.

after a couple more episodes of friends i finally got a text from kate saying that she was getting off the plane in 1 hour then it would be a 2 hour drive. that meant that it was time to make dinner. before kate even left i decided on making lobster bisque for the first time. it just felt right.

before i started cooking i obviously had to play music so i turned my cooking playlist which is literally just taylor swift songs but who cares. i threw on a pale yellow apron and began to get my ingredients out.

the actual time it took to cook the meal was only around a hour but i had to run to the store to get heavy cream. along with the bisque i made some asparagus and prepared a couple drinks.

by the time i finsihed setting everything up on our table, i got the text from kate saying she was only 15 minutes away. for finishing touches i lit a candle and put on noah kahan to play in the backround.

just before kate pulled into the drive way i rushed to my room and switched into some light blue lingerie. i put my shorts on along with that same tan sweater. i came out of the room just in time to catch kate as she walked in.

the first thing i saw when my girlfriend walked through the door was the largest smile ever. my body immediately latched onto kate's chest wrapping my legs around her hips and wrapping my arms around her back. the sound of her laughter in real life was like the biggest breath of fresh air going through my lungs.

i dug my nose into the crook between her neck and shoulder. her chin rested on my back and i felt her laughs run down my spine sending even more serotonin through my veins.

"i missed you so much" my voice was muffled under her skin but by her squeezing me tighter i knew she still heard me.

"i did too princess" kate's hands moved down to under my thighs to lift me off of her.

i flailed my hand to the right to show her the dinner i had set up for us. her hands went over her mouth to cover her absolute awe. she giggled against her palm and pulled me into another hug placing a sloppy kiss on my lips.

"you did this for me?" she said as she made her way to the dining table. i nodded back eagerly while swaying my hips back and forth.

there were so many things we talked about during dinner it's hard to list it all. half of the conversations were me telling her how good she did during her game and that i was thinking about her the entire time she was gone. i noticed her beginning to blush when the lace bra strap peeked through her own sweater.

"i just noticed are you....wearing my sweater?" laughed followed out of her mouth after she swallowed a spoonful of the food.

"yes. yes i am" i said confidently while holding my chin in the air.

------------------------------------------------------------

after dinner was finished we decided to go back to our room to watch a movie. we decided on watching my favorite, lady bird. once the movie started playing i could feel kates hand wandering up my shorts closer and closer to my panties. before anything else happened she lifted my leg on top of hers and left it to rest there for almost halfway through the movie.

throughout the movie i could still feel her fingers teasing with the hem of my (her) sweater and pulling at the drawstring of my shorts. small whines left my mouth everytime i felt her warm hands against my bare skin. a soft shudder left my mouth when her hand finally wrapped around the back of my hips, pulling me ontop of her lap. the movie was out of the picture now.

kate leaned against the headboard as i straddled her hips. her hands had a strong grip on my waist once i found a good position to sit in. without speaking i inched my lips closer towards kate's and gently pressed a few kisses against her lips.

the kiss began to deepen as kate's hands moved between my ass and thighs. i felt her fingernails dig into my soft skin causing me to gasp against her mouth. she slowly shoved her tongue through my lips and intertwined it with my own tongue.

as the kiss got sloppier i began to grind my hips against kate's jeans. the rough material peeked through my thin shorts just enough to send soft moans up my throat. kate's grip on my waist for tighter ad she moved me at a faster pace against her.

i moved my lips down to her jawline, taking my time to kiss every inch of her. my lips left a trail of saliva as i made my way down to the collar of her jacket.

"take this off for me baby" i whispered to kate, letting my lips graze over her ear.

without hesitation she tore her jacket off along with the tank top underneath, leaving her in a just a black nika sports bra and her jeans.

i continued kissing down to her chest, leaving dark marks across her collarbones and neck. kate let out a whine once i began to suck on the sweet spot at her chest.

"baby please...." kate groaned out.

her voice became louder as i made my way down to her abs still making sure to leave kisses in as many places as i could.

once i reached her belt i didn't wait any longer. i couldn't. i unbuckled her belt while kissing around her hips. kate lifted her hips up enough for me to slide her jeans off and toss them to the floor. i pushed myself back up to her lips, placing kisses on and around her lips as i slowly took of her boxers. one last kiss was pressed against her lips before i moved back down to her thighs.

i got a grip on her lower thighs and pulled her to the edge of the bed so that she was sitting up. just to tease her, i left a trail of kisses all the way from her knees to her bare pussy.

as i got closer i used one of my hands to gently spread her legs enough for me to fit my mouth against her cunt. i slowly circled my tongue around her clit, taking my time just how kate likes.

her hands quickly were tangled in my hair as i sped up my pace. my lips molded around kate's clit, sucking in all of her. eventually i felt kates hips buck against my face making a smirk grow on my lips.

"fuck" she tried to stay quiet but covering her mouth with her hand or a pillow.

my tongue lapped through her folds quickly causing kate to let out groans that couldn't be muffled. i continued sucking around her pussy until her thighs were wrapped around my ears making it harder to hear her beautiful voice. i didn't mind though.

"fuck right there" i heard her moan out.

kate's heels slightly lifted up off of the floor once i forced my tongue deeper in her. i finally curled my tongue in just the right place to make her cum on my lips. her thighs loosened their grip revealing her screaming my name.

i pulled my mouth off of her cunt and moved back up her lips. kate's hands were still entangled in my hair but eventually moved back to my hips. i crawled ontop of kate's lap back into a straddling position. our lips continued to melt together while i gently began grinding down on her hips again. she pulled away for a second to push her self back against the headboard again.

once we were back at our first position, kate wrapped her hand around my back scooting my closet to her chest. i felt her fingers fiddling with the sweater that i had on. without saying a word i took of the sweater revealing the light blue bra i had put on for her before she got here.

her hands immediately gravitated to my tits massaging them in a circular motion through the lace. she surprisingly did not ask to take my bra off so she began to move her hands closer to my thighs that were still covered in a pair of shorts.

"may i?" kate teased at the edge of my shorts.

i nodded enough for her to slip off my shorts and throw them in a pile across the room. now that i was left in only my matching bra and panties kate placed her hand right against my clothed pussy. she used three of her fingers to apply pressure against my entire cunt.

a loud whine left my mouth followed by strings of curse words. kate took this as a sign to slip off my soaked panties and toss them away from us.

"my turn then right?" kate cocked her head to the side right before dipping two fingers in my sopping wet entrance. her fingers began pumping in and out at a slower pace. it just wasn't enough for me. i started to move my hips enough to ride her fingers sending an electric feeling through my skin.

my head tilted back at kate hit my g spot. a couple tears began to fall down my face now that kate started speeding up her fingers. she slowly inserted a third finger causing my back to arch.

i tried my best to not look into kate's eyes knowing that she was probably smirking at how much noise i was making.

soon enough kate drove her fingers deep enough to make me cum for the first time. i road out my orgasm and began to work at my next one. i looked into kate's eyes for a split second triggering her to press her lips against mine. since her hands were busy fucking me and holding moving my hips at a steady pace, i moved my hands up to her jawline twisting her head to fit her nose right next to mine. like a puzzle piece.

fuck i missed this.

[m4vestu]

Gingerbread Man - C. Sturniolo

-blurb sortaᥫ᭡

a/n: I've had this little idea for days now and I kinda hate it now but I wanted to put something cute out soon so enjoy!!

warning: not proofread

You had spent many Christmas Eves in the Sturniolo household, but this year was the first as Chris's girlfriend.

"Ma, wake up." You'd been fast asleep in Chris's room for hours before he barged in. "if you don't get up I'm gonna get trev in here to... pee on you." Chris was joking but he at least thought it would be enough to trick his girlfriend into waking up.

"what do you want Christopher" you managed to giggle out, being half asleep and all.

"Matt, Nick, and I are doing a last-minute gingerbread house-making challenge, and I want my baby on my team," Chris said that last part in hopes of persuading you to get up. You opened your eyes a bit more to see him walking over with Trevor in hand. He placed the dog on the bed in front of you and gave him a little nudge. "on the count of three, trev, just like we practiced."

You looked at them both in confusion, unknowing to what was to come.

"three...two... ONE!" Chris and Trevor both sent kisses all around your face until you were a giggling mess. "OK OK, -I'M UP, GUYS -STOP IT."

Chris pulls away and twirls out of the bedroom happy his little plan worked. You get up, throw on one of Chris's hoodies that lied on the floor, fixed your hair a bit and the mirror, scooped up Trevor off the bed, and made your way into the kitchen with the boys.

____________

"Chris!! the roof is slipping oh my god!" It was a battle between you and Chris versus Matt and Nick to see who could make the best-looking gingerbread house while one member of each team was blindfolded.

"It a little hard to keep the roof up when I can't see, baby" Chris tried over and over to glue everything and keep it together without falling before the timer runs out.

"okay we wont have a lot of time, so let's just decorate the outside." you handed Chris the piping bag with the pink icing inside and guide his hand to start drawing windows on the side of the house.

"I just have a feeling yours and Chris's house looks like shit right now" Nick yelled from the other side of the counter.

"I actually CAN see and let me just say you and Matt aren't looking so hot right now" You were quick to throw an insult back as this was natural to you after all these years.

"Bro what are you talking about right now, chris got y'all house lookin' like something diseased."

Before you could respond back to Matt's remark, Chris slathered a large swipe of icing across your face. You stand there in utter shock at what Chris had just done. He and Matt burst out in uncontrollable laughter, not seeing it coming.

"STOP what did I miss guys, I cannot stand both of you" Nick shouts unaware as to what's happening.

"no fucking way." you grab the other piping bag off the table and get ready to pour it all over Chris. Just as you are about to get him back, Chris throws his blindfold off and runs down to the living room.

You start running after him "I'm gonna fucking kill you" you say, ready for revenge.

"cant catch me ma, I'm the gingerbread man," he says now running circles around the coffee table while you tried to nag him.

Just after saying this, he tripped over one of trevors toys and right onto the couch. You took this as your chance and straddled his waist to assure he doesn't get back up.

Now that you've got him right where you want him, you pour icing all over his face out of revenge and spite. he reaches out to your sides and starts tickling mercilessly. Unable to keep in your laughter, you surrender and Chris wipes the icing off his face with his shirt.

With you still on top of him, he can't help but pull you into a kiss. You grab his face and deepen into the kiss, still giggling into his lips.

"You're a shit gingerbread man Chris," you say before going right back into the kiss.

He pulls away ready to say his snark remark before a pillow hits you both. You both turn in the direction the pillow seemed to come, seeing Matt and Nick looking back in disgust

"Can you freaks get up so we can finish the video please"

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