#u can all also reblog this post of mine to show your predictions too. I would love to see it! ^^

[cr1ms0n4nd-ac3]

Hello Hello and greetings my friendzies!!

Welcome to my very long post of my new and ever Sleep Token predictions!

Where this post can tell either each of them that may or may not happen before Europe-UK tours, during Europe-UK tours or after the tour is done! Or whatever, could be anything!!

And just to let you know, none of my predictions will ever come true for the ST fandom.

But if it did come true, nor some predictions did managed to finally make it come true- then I suppose I consider this a win—! :D

Now let's get this started!!

New predictions start here!

↓

Okay, let us predict of what new songs are gonna be in the setlist, but I'm not just gonna simply guess in simple words.. I'm gonna guess the new songs in the setlist with my new light color concept!

And some songs too that will soon return! But with new extra light color? Who knows!

Let's find out!

New Song Predictions:

The Apparition -

By in very popular demand, it seems that ST fans wanted the song The Apparition to be in the setlist. But if it's in the setlist..

What will the light color be?

To me, at the beginning of the song. It starts off with simple white light color. While it goes up.. the particle lights being light-greyish. Until it fades as the white color turns to red. And the particles turn from light-greyish to white and red at the same time! And when the "Why are you NEEEEEVVVERR REAAALLLL!?!" happens. Red, Yellow and White lights and White particles shine shine!! And then it slowly makes it to Red at the end of the song..

Cool right?

Are you really Okay?

I'm not sure if this is really by popular demand, but all of us will be very emotional about this song in the setlist lmao- Espera Vocals too!

Now, for AYRO..

The beginning of the song having this yellow-whiteish color. Then the lazer lights show up as white color once again. But when things pick up the pace.. White color and Blue lights! And then the end finally became light-orange-ish white for the "Please don't hurt yourself again". Yeah, you're welcome for being emotionally destroyed-

- Distraction.

Distraction... Oh do I want Distraction to be in the setlist. Yes I do!

And I know just the light color concept to be if it's really on the setlist!

The beginning having the cyan color, while it turns into blue but still repeats the pattern! However, the white light particles are shown too and the lazer lights becoming indigo! But as the part "It's too late for me" happened, it turned into Red at first. But it soon slowly fades to Blue, foreshadowing Descending/the person's descend. The repeat part of "its too late for me" repeatedly turns from Red to Blue, and at the end.. it turned into Blue instead.

And for bonus, Espera Vocals! :))

Descending -

I think we all know that we want Descending to be in the setlist.. so what will the light color be?

During the Beginning, the lights becoming very blue, symbolising its descending deeper into the ocean. And then the light particle and lazer lights had the purple color. It went being the same until the lazer lights turned to cyan. And the end? Lazer lights turn cyan while the particle became red.

Representing that we had finally descended.. down deeper and ever.

Telomeres -

I feel like the song Telomeres having the vibe of blue(beginning), cyan(middle part) and indigo(IV's solo and at the end) will bring me into tears of joy- Because yeah.

TPWBYT is the Ocean/Depression Album after all. Also Espera vocals go yummy YUMMY!!

High Water -

A very very blue and indigo vibe lights here, and then it turns to pink at tge end, by foreshadowing the next last song for Missing Limbs!

The last song's light colors are really beautiful tho..

Drag Me Under -

Green and White lights for the song that first emotionally destroy me. ESPECIALLY THE ESPERA VOCALS AUGHHHHHHHHH...!! <:(((

I remember I watched that live version video on Youtube. And I thought having the color of Green and White will suit this! Also the lazer lights being Red for the near-end! :)

Gods -

This is also by popular demand, so here is my light color concept on this!

Red lights and White/Red particle lights/lazer lights. And I believe that this is gonna be foreshadowing the third last part for TMBTE, and this is what I LIKE TO SEE!!

Give -

Pink lights and Purple spotlights and light particle, the Falsetto vocals for Vessel will so ascend us fr-

Take Aim -

I'm so not ready if this song is gonna be in the setlist, ONE EMOTIONAL THERAPY FOR US HEHE, Now to me for the light color concept..

White(beginning and end, and also the lazer lights, light particles and spotlights having the same color-) Blue(middle part) and Red(near end) colors represents Happiness disguising itself as Hate/Toxicity. Which is why I would love to see this song at Live. What do you all think?

And for the bonus... Calcutta!

Orange at the beginning, the lazer lights appeared as light orange, then the solo part turns to orange yet again before it became Light Orange at the end! With light particles becoming blue..! Hehe,,

Alright! The first part is done, now it's time for the second part..

Songs that'll return again with extra new ones!

But as I said before, I am still gonna guess the new light color concepts. So I hope you're ready for this!

Aqua Regia -

Same purple and white lights! We already seen some live videos about it, so I think it'll be the same!

Vore -

Same green color too! Again, we do see it in live. So I think it'll remain the same.

The Love You Want -

Again, same pink lights and we did see it in live videos! But since Euclid already had the pink color, I think TLYW will have the new light color for purple(beginning), orange(near-end) and blue(end!) Who knows, we'll had to find out!

Fall For Me -

Oh god... That song broke us, and if this song is gonna return. I know just a concept for this:

At first, the beginning having the white color. But when the part "OH GOD I WISH YOU WERE HERE!!!" happens, it slowly turns from white to indigo-blue.. and that's pretty much it-

Mine -

I feel like any of you must have miss this one, I think they'll go off for the blue(beginning), cyan(middle part), and indigo(end)colors while the light particle or lazer lights were white! I really hope this will make a return..

Bloodsport. -

Honestly, we see this at live videos. So I know damn well they're going for the red color lights. The song still brokes me when I cover it with my flute- 🥲

Sugar -

Pink, Red and Blue lights. That's all I can say for this.. And since it is also in popular demand lmao- XDD

And for the bonus.. Nazareth!

Same colors honestly! I think maybe you all will have an light color concept u like to tell me! I hope to hear this again someday!! ^^

Next up, Events!

Events from Europe-UK tours and something else new may or may not happen anytime soon,

So here is mine!

While you reblog to add yours too!

1. The Summoning Shenanigans becoming even more unhinged and more worser than the US tours:

More Chaos? Equals Worse Chaos?Sure! This is getting even more worser than the US tours anyway because we all had a bad but good feeling about this lmao— Just imagine Vessel wanting to play with the new mic once more, which makes III so pissed off! And I think Vessel will pretty much bother IV next in more chaotic and worse ways lol- XDD

2. More Appreciation!

New audience? Equals more appreciation! As long as they don't go too energetic or too wild..

3. New looks? HELL YEAH?!?

Honestly, I don't think we'll get new looks for each band members.. but I think we'll had to see new subtle changes! In either IV, Espera, Vessel or III! We'll had to see then. Also, IV and III having new outfits... the two either bought it for themselves or just got it for no reason- The edits and the aura is gonna be so fire if this really happens!! AAAAA I WANT TO DREAM THIS!! ✨✨

4. Vessel and IV's voice improving.

Imagine the screaming vocals for the two, the growl vocals for the two, even the falsetto vocals for VESSEL.. Damn well I know I want them to take care of themselves.. so I think their voices will improve so much if they really did it! No wonder why all of us wanted a live album- me too! I would listen to it all day like Ghost's RITEHERERIGHTNOW live album. xD

5. New hats?? New outfits?? New sense of style!!

I'm pretty sure I'd seen some posts of them will be getting new hats soon.. I think the same in my opinion! I feel like now I want III to wear wolf ears and II wearing dog ears hehe- oh and the outfits, the new style?? OML I CAN FEEL THE GREATNESS FOR THE BOYS!!! :DD

6. Will Vessel finally talk? Yes, No, Maybe, or probably?

I'm pretty sure I made a post about my dream prediction last night.. honestly, I don't think we'll be seeing him talk again since we last saw him talk.

But imagine the courage he gets, to thank us for the genuine respect and support for what we had shown him! THAT will be sadly emotional for us.

6. III talk in 2024!

More III talk, MORE LOUDNESS!! It'll probably never happen tbh..

7. The Offering Zoomies be like "BARK BARK!!!!"-

Probably we'll see more offering zoomie moments.. specifically the "TAKE A BITE!!!" part at the near end- bro sounds like an aggressive dog too!

8. New pictures from ADAM!!

Oh boy, I can tell the pictures are gonna be awesome as hell!! I mean, the high quality is sooo fitting like- ✌️✌️

9. Lore implication from the other new interludes? Y not?

I mean, surely the new interludes had some different meaning. But if we get the other new interludes WHICH HAS NEW LORE..

It's detective time folks!

10. Either someone in the ST band gave an emotional speech, or idk.... But that will be a great change of pace.

11. New live light colors!! In probably each song or songs that'll return, I already typed a lot from my new songs prediction so y not!!!

12. We are gonna have a Sleep Token ARG if there is some cryptic stuff happening, and it's up to us to solve it!

Done, and also-!

13. NEW LIVE ALBUM, NEW SONG, NEW EP, NEW COVER OR WHATEVER.. GIVE US SOME NEW CONTENT ALREADY RAHHHHHHHH

14. The lights having new details! I really wanna see how this turn out!!

Bonus: A Sleep Token ARG is about to happen soon. ( I am INTENSE as hell rn. )

Okay, in my honesty and my..not-so great predictions inside my head.

I had a very very VERY VERY VERY SO VERY intense feeling that as soon as the Europe-UK tour ends. I feel like we are about to see an ARG happening very soon, so you must know this.

I remember I've seen some 1 year ago posts of anyone trying to find out the Rune Words when TMBTE covers were teased before the official release. It went well but honestly, this year of 2024 tho. Another ARG is gonna happen and I can feel it.

Imagine the teasers, the cryptic posts, the new puzzles, and even cryptic messages on each posts or..whatever! It's gonna be like the TØP lore ARG but THINGS ARE GETTING EVEN MORE CRAZIER!!

And I know it may not happen soon, but still...I can feel it, and i'm getting more tenser than ever...

—

...AND, it seems you had made it to the end! :DD

My god it took like.. not one, but 10 HOURS to type all of it. All because of school, all because of loss of motivation and energy, all because of slight burnouts BUT I DID IT! HAHA LET'S GOOOO!!

And I swear, if some of my predictions were right.. tag me and remind me right now, and I am gonna squeal in happiness.

That is all.

Have a great day/night. ^^

[thethousandyearwitch]

“Tumblr Cultings” another Shitpost fic.

Hisoka is a ~~Tumblr Influencer~~ and decides to start drama. 1334 Words. 

fanfiction.net link

Click. Clack. Click. Hisokas nails tapped quickly against his phone screen. "Tonight it's going down. I have had e-nough of a certain person here, and all of you deserve to know who and why! ~ ♠️ " Post. He didn't have to wait long before the familiar pings and blops of instant messages and questions asked to his blog started.

Anonymous: Who is it?? (≧▽≦) So excited to see you tear someone a new one!! IM from cutiepanther: where do u even get your info from lol?. IM from chaineddown: I Thought You Were Done Creating Drama For Attention. 

Hisoka snickers to himself, lazily grabbing another whiteclaw from the fridge, before retreating to his bedroom desk. He takes a first sip of his drink while opening his laptop, and quickly going on tumblr.com once it has finished setting up. @Bubblegumbitch, 20.879 followers. 7.344 posts. 27 new asks, 7 new IMs. With a satisfied sigh, the popular blogger sets down his can, and cracks his knuckles.

YouTube Influencers make a lot of money through ad-revenue. Instagram influencers hold themselves over water with sponsorships. And though Hisoka did hold a platform on both of these as well, he preferred the more traditional customs of the blogging site. You don't get paid for having a lot of followers, or making popular posts, and sponsorships are almost entirely unheard of.  But he wasn't in it for the money anyway. The drama was far more alluring. Hisoka had made his starts as a "Tumblr influencer" through creating blog layouts, masterposts of custom themes, and the occasional "funny" post, which was usually just him vagueing about someone that pissed him off that day. His first call-out post he wrote at 7k followers, calling out a far bigger blogger than he is for stealing codes for their theme and for kinning a character from a TV show that has generally been frowned upon on Tumblr for being "atrocious and a bad influence". No one likes to admit it, but everyone loves a little drama, don't they? To see someone else's dirty laundry aired out, the relief that it isn't their own, the community effort of shutting someone out of their reigns for one simple post. A satisfied Huff escapes Hisoka as he dwells in this lovely memory. Time to make a new one.

"CALLOUT POST for @spidershead13 I can't believe I would ever have to do this for someone like him, but Chrollo has definitely pushed it too far~. Definitely don't harrass him, just unfollow and block his sorry ass!~ ♣️ ."

Excitiment starts to bubble under Hisokas skin. In truth, of course, Chrollo did nothing horribly wrong, nothing at least that Hisoka could proof. But everyone likes good drama between popular blogs that follow different themes. If this post could rile him up enough to write a callout post for Hisoka in return- Blop. IM from porcelaincat: Hisoka. Oh no, the fun police. Bubblegumbitch: Yeeeees?~ ♥️ Porcelaincat: Are you not too old to start petty fights online? Bubblegumbitch: OUCH. ♠️ Bubblegumbitch: I stay young at heart, dear.~ Porcelaincat: 1) Gross. 2). Who are you bullying this time? Bubblegumbitch: Chrollo @spiderhead13 :o) Porcelaincat: I am surprised, I honestly did not take you for that stupid. My fault.

Ouch. Illumi never cared if he was hurting feelings. Maybe he should write the call-out post about Hisoka. Though Hisoka doesn't have any viable dirt on him, not yet at least, not until he finds that porn blog that hes SURE Illumi has hidden away somewhere. Whatever, fuck that guy and his voice of reason. Hisoka takes another gulp of his whiteclaw, and goes back to typing.

"It has come to my attention, that multiple people have had the same unpleasant experience with Chrollo, something you cannot let slide so easily~." 

(Multiple people meaning one fake blog that he himself created to write himself IM messages "receipts".)

"In the following screenshots, one person tells me about how Chrollo tried to convince them to come visit him in Newyork and joins his 'church'! That's right, the guys a cult leader, trying to lure in more people from here!~ (Blogname in the Screenshots is blacked out for anonymitys sake ofc)."

Was he going too far, trying to convince everyone that Chrollo was a Cult leader probably out to harvest their organs? Or was he not going far enough

"Not sure what everyone was expecting of a goth blog like his, posting all that ~deep~ and ~brooding~ stuff, but pleeaaaseee stay clear of him now, don't let yourselves get pulled into some scary cult bs~ ♦️ .

#callout #calloutpost #internetbloodsports #cult. "

And post. Hisoka spins excitedly in his chair, self satisfied with his own hubris.  Immediately more blops and pings storm in. Anonymous: I knew chrollo was a weirdo, mayor bad vibes ಠωಠ Anonymous: thank you for talking about this, honestly scary!!!!! Spiderslegtostandon: What is your damage? Hisoka chuckles. Now only to wait for- IM from spidershead13: Hello. Chrollos timing was as usual, perfect. Bubblegumbitch: Why hello~~~~ ♠️ Spidershead13: I believe we need to talk about whatever that post was. Hisoka glances at the notes, a steady stream of likes and reblogs flowing in. Damage control is gonna be hard for the opposing side.

Bubblegumbitch: Sorry, I believe I'm just warning the people about you~. Didn't take you for such a dangerous guy :o( Spidershead13: Can you give me the @ of the person sending you those messages? Obviously they must have gotten something wrong. I'd never Invite just anyone to come over here, and I'd also never force my beliefs on anyone. Bubblegumbitch: Sorry, no can do. Who says you're not going to doxx em~. ♠️ I don't want to be responsible for putting someone in danger more than they already are~.

The influencer was now just leaning back in his chair, taking in a cool nights-breeze flowing in from the window. Was Chrollo mad? He's sure he'd want to punch him right now. What will he start Hisokas call-out with? Who would people believe more? It was all so exciting.

Spidershead13: Hisoka, this is nothing to joke about. I don't want to loose the trust of my community. I want to clear my name. Bubblegumbitch: if you can proof that I, or my informant has lied, I won't stop you from trying.~ ♣️ Spidershead13: Is this another childish game to you? Bubblegumbitch: A game? I take public safety extremely serious!~ :o(

No reply for 10 minutes. Hisoka bites his bottomlip, basking in the excitement of the unknown next moves of Chrollo. He was unpredictable, and thats what made him fun to toy with. If he was simply out to ruin someone's blogging experience, he could have cherry picked any one popular blog, dig long enough for dirt, and run them off the site in less than 2 hours. But that's predictable, that's normal, where's the fun in that?

Ping. Anonymous: Where's the Call-out?? Did you bitch out? Huh? Anonymous: did you delete the post? Was about to forward it to some friends who r mutuals with chrollo Pardon? Hisoka check his blog, and behold- The post is gone. Wooshed away, as the site itself would annoyingly proclaim. Did the site glitch out and delete it? Is it simply not displaying the post? 

Spidershead13: So you did fake those screenshots, I assume. The URL in your IMs leads to an empty blog with the same IP address as you Spidershead13: I did not take you for someone who'd stoop that low. Bubblegumbitch: Hahaha what did you DO?~ ♠️  ♠️ ♠️ ♠️ ♠️ Spidershead13: Had a friend of mine 'check' your blog. He was also nice enough to delete the post for you already.

Hisoka blinks. Once. Then twice. He's been hacked. This was going even better than he had anticipated. Quickly he screenshots the conversation, before hitting "New Textpost". " !!!I'VE BEEN HACKED BY @SPIDERSHEAD13!!!! [Screenshot] #callout #callout post #internbloodsports #hacker"

Post.

Ping. Blop. Blop. Blop. Ping. This was going to be a long, delicious night.

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

hey, i don't mind! if u spend like a minute scrolling through the "mine" tag on my blog you will find me replying a LOT to ppl on my posts, bc i genuinely love discussing this show! (and u will also find that it would be very hypocritical for me to be annoyed at ur response for being "too long")

overall tho i agree with what u said! character count is limited in the replies so i was simplifying my stance a lot, and the "bullying" part especially came out wrong. someone actually @'ed me on a separate post abt that part, so i did elaborate on what i meant here. the short version: izzy doesn't bully stede, but he would agree with stede's childhood bullies abt how soft and unmanly stede is. so when steddyhands fic make stede be really nice to izzy with no character growth on izzy's part, not only is it wildly ooc but it also just rubs me the wrong way.

(obviously tho the real reason izzy doesn't like stede is bc stede is stealing ed's attention and ruining the edgy pirate lifestyle izzy's been enjoying for the past several years)

anyway, i said in another post that my take on steddyhands is "not my thing but i respect it," bc i DO see the appeal. im personally a big fan of characters having Difficult Conversations and growing as people, deconstructing toxic thought patterns and learning to get along. but so much steddyhands content... Doesn't Do That!!! they're just indulging in their fanon fantasy of giving izzy nice things, which is fine i guess. but I dislike izzy hands as he behaves in canon, and i don't want him to get nice things without some good old-fashioned character growth. and i LOVE reading or watching or writing that kind of character growth, so even for fans who don't hate izzy as much as i do, i just... don't see the appeal of just pampering him in fic with no actual analysis of his character. imo it feels like such a waste of a very interesting character

but i can at least see a fanfic plotline where the three of them end up together in a way that doesn't have one of the characters acting insanely ooc. (i am actually. writing a reblog on this post. with the synopsis of such a fic). when it is ooc, that's when it really looses any potential appeal for me.

--

(ps. i'm not entirely sure if your prediction for the next season is how i think season 2 will go. for starters, i don't think ed was actually all that "erratic" at the end of the season. from the perspective of the other characters who don't know the whole story, yeah, but all of ed's behavior pretty clearly came in response to the things he was going through. he got left at the dock (essentially getting dumped), so he stayed in his room crying for a full day (several days? the timeline is kinda wonky). lucius encouraged him to open up and let go, so ed came out of hiding and started talking to people and cleaning up his room. izzy threatens to kill ed, makes ed think about all the people who've abandoned him and how this crew might be the same, and ed retreats into Blackbeard again, the version of himself that nobody fucks with. but even at the end of the episode, he's still in control of himself; he's very calm and collected as he goes about intimidating izzy, hiring jim, and getting rid of stede's stuff/crew.

so like, idk how much izzy will be regretting his actions in s2. considering his reaction to the toe thing, i don't think he has a problem with the Kraken. after almost getting thrown overboard by stede's crew, izzy knows he needs ed/blackbeard to stay alive. and izzy needs ed to act like Blackbeard, or else izzy is of no use to ed (like, it's not as if izzy was gonna participate in the talent show, lol). the only thing that could make izzy unhappy next season is if ed decides he doesn't need izzy anymore, and considering that izzy is the one who pushed ed back into being blackbeard, i don't think ed's gonna come to that conclusion on his own.)

once again, cannot stress enough how much steddyhands is not my thing, but i'm once again thinking abt how all the steddyhands content i see just does stede so dirty and it literally. almost makes me want to write my own steddyhands fic just to show y'all how it's done fhjkfhgjdfk

[almaasi]

you have witch powers? i've always been fascinated with "paranormal" stuff, including magic, so i was wondering if u could tell me stuff about it. is magic real? what kind of stuff did ur grandma do? are ghosts and spirits real too? what kinds of spells can witches cast? is it like supernatural? sorry if i'm asking a lot of questions i'm just so fascinated and curious. i didn't even know witches were like, legit until i read ur tags, i just thought that people back then said that so they had 1/2

2/2 a reason to burn a woman they didn’t like. ok now i’m rambling but in short, what can u tell me about witch stuff? i’m just asking cause i’m really curious :)

(about my tags on this)

#whenever phil gets out the tarot cards and pulls something scarily accurate i’m just like…. yes…. good…show us your witch powers…… #(my own experience with tarot? so reassuring. and calming. it’s like asking for a friend’s advice but that friend is your own brain.) #also my great grandmother was a witch by profession and i definitely got some of her magic #i have not yet learned to recognise a feeling when i feel it.. but when stuff happens later i’m like OH THAT WAS MY MYSTERIOUS FEELING #one of our sheep died a week or so ago.. and for two days straight i was outside in the middle of the night staring at the moon #and wondering why i felt death in the air #and the rain made me cry and it felt like release but i didn’t know why #and i immediately started worrying about our sheep but didn’t follow up to see if they were okay #then two days later my mother comes in and tells me one of our sheep died and two days ago had given my mother “the death look” #if you’ve never seen someone or something die… there’s this look they have that’s like a disgraced peacefulness and self-awareness #but basically i knew the sheep was gonna die without any reason for me to think that #and i need to learn to follow up on my instincts because they’re ever-present and i never know when it’s a psychic thing or random anxiety #disclaimer: IS IT ALL BULLSHIT who knows? but science doesn’t know a whole lot about a lot of things and this stuff is natural to me #so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

okay!! i was expecting someone to ask, so here goes. (in case anyone’s wondering, this is a personal post, and no, i’m not making this stuff up.) (feel free to reblog if you want. but it’s so goddamn long aaah)

first off, an opinion: whether or not you believe magic is real in this world is entirely related to whether or not it is real. at least in my books. magic/paramormal stuff can always be observed, but if you don’t believe it’s anything beyond coincidence or skilled trickery, it’s not gonna impact you.

i do believe in ghosts (or djinns, or something else human-like), but in my experience they don’t really do anything except exist in some other realm and occasionally become visible when i’m at my most lucid, at that point between waking and sleeping. most people (myself included) would say it’s just a hallucination. but like…. who’s to say it isn’t real, just in a way we as humans don’t yet understand? y’know?

the most interesting ghost sighting i’ve experienced was when i was fully awake, not hallucinating. i was in a car with my sister, my sister’s friend, and her mother - and we drove over a bridge, and i saw a fritzing semi-translucent black figure walking along the peak. i looked back and it was gone. it wasn’t scary, it was just really cool. i saw that with my own two eyes, i have zero doubt i saw it, and for that moment, it was there.

other times i’ve seen things pass through walls, or felt presences in the room that vanish when i look. i get deja vu maybe once a week. the ability comes and goes in phases, switched on and off whenever i tell someone about it. it’s like that part of my brain gets really shy and goes into hiding when it’s mentioned.

sometimes it can be pretty powerful. there’ve been moments when a deja vu begins, i remember it from a dream, fast-forward through the memory to remember what happens, and i get ahead of present time, so i predict what’s in front of me by about one to three seconds. usually it’s snippets of conversation, or my hands moving to complete an action, or words i’m typing. (let me tell you, it’s so freaking bizarre when you’re consciously typing, thinking about what you’re typing, and simultaneously remembering typing it before, and knowing what you’re about to type despite not yet knowing. and then seeing it happen. i think a lot of people reading this would be like “what?” but i know there’s someone out there who knows exactly what i mean)

for a long time in my teenage years i told people i’d see coloured figures, like auras without physical people, just hanging around out there in the world, but due to health issues a lot of my teenage memories are gone, and the only memory i have of that stuff is the recollection of me telling people about it, and remembering it while telling people. it’s really weird. i sometimes think maybe i made that up?? but i don’t understand why i’d do that when i do actually see other things sometimes.

once, my family visited this old historic building, and i remember seeing a woman in a maid’s outfit duck through a doorway. but she wasn’t actually there. so. idk.

my great-grandmother (or great-great grandmother?) on my mother’s side used to sell love spells to the people in her Indian village. my mother told me about it when i was little. my [great] great grandmother would write a spell on parchment, and the client had to go home and burn it in their fire. and she would curse people, in exchange for payment. that’s all i know about that. but my grandmother (also on my mother’s side) used to have some kind of power, i never got to ask about it while she was still alive. (she was an awesome woman. one of the first women in her country and generation to go to university.)

personally, having been raised as a muslim, i always felt really disconnected from the culture and practices of the religion, even though i believe in the supernatural aspects of it right down to my core. that’s despite my ultimate acknowledgement of facts being deeply rooted in hard science. recently (like, in the past few months) i’ve started to rediscover my faith - directly following on from a quiet interest in the pinterest & instagram aesthetics of paganism and new age magic, which as a concept i was never really sure about. i just really liked how it looked. basically, it clicked in my brain that islamic prayers could, in essence, just be spells. you gotta take everything with a grain of salt. they might not work. but that’s the beauty of it.

a few weeks ago i stumbled across a prayer on tumblr, and read its intended purpose: “Allah will grant whoever recites this seven times in the morning or evening whatever he desires from this world or the next”.

and… i started to think, maybe the purpose is not to actually do that. nothing ought to be a get-out-of-jail-free/do-this-and-your-life-is-made type thing. maybe the purpose is to make you believe nothing can go wrong. and that every bad thing that happens–? it happens so that you can learn from it. and eventually, after many things change, you realise what you desire was not the thing you thought you desired. (idk how to explain that. an example from my life: i really wanted to be a veterinarian growing up. then i got sick, dropped out of school. and now i’m a writer. i want to be a writer more than i ever wanted to be a vet. i had to get sick and my life had to fall apart before i could discover that. writing was never something i’d have considered before.)

my point is, if you believe everything that happens to you will ultimately be a good thing, bad things don’t hurt so much.

and if you take something as a sign, it’s a sign. it’s just your own brain taking hints from the world around you and using them to conjure up a decision. if you wanna believe it’s magic, it is.

personally i like protection prayers/spells and just…generally positive ones. i say prayers for sick friends, people who i see on my tumblr dash who are having a bad time, and if i see or hear about disasters or worldwide events. i’m not expecting it to have a visible impact, but like.. what’s the harm? at the very least it makes me feel like i did something if i don’t have money to give, or i can’t be there with a friend, or the world is falling apart and i’m helpless. praying or saying a spell is just hoping, really, really hard. if some greater being is out there, listening? cool. (but what if god doesn’t wanna do anything? maybe it’s like my cupcake theory. god puts the ingredients in a baking tray, shoves it in the oven, forgets about it. the universe rises as a cupcake. god made it. but the universe is doing its own damn thing.)

regarding tarot cards: again, it’s self-reflection. you can believe answers come from outside influences, but it’s easily just as much about interpreting generic advice and making it mean something to you. but personally i’ve drawn random cards, and known that no other card in the deck would’ve been as relevant at that moment. i’ve used tarot cards to determine the endings for my stories, and coincidentally pulled cards that directly represent my title characters.

one time i was thinking about my fic “The Moonlighter and the Magician” and the card i pulled first was The Magician. and i was like gee thanks tarot cards that’s helpful. (but actually? it meant those cards were on the same wavelength as me. think about it. 78 cards, there’s a one in 78 chance i pull that one on my first try.)

apart from my wonky first-ever tarot readings with the Rider-Waite travel-size tarot deck (which belonged to my mother), i’ve never pulled anything that didn’t eventually make sense. i use The Wild Unknown cards now, i relate to them so much more. plus they’re mine, not borrowed or abandoned for years, which probably helps. (buying those cards was the most money i ever spent on anything. i don’t regret it.)

is any of this like the show ‘supernatural’? not really. the closest i can say my experiences have come to the show would be the episode “faith”. just, the whole episode. it doesn’t matter if it’s the real deal, so long as it works. and boy, does it work for me. and a lot of other people.

like i said, all the spirit-like entities i’ve encountered have been perfectly benign. no monsters, except things i’m pretty sure are nightmares.

but on that note, i take a lot of things to help me sleep. if i didn’t, i’d be waking up screaming night and day (i hit whistle register while screaming, once). i see faces in the dark and creatures in my bedroom, even when my eyes are closed and i’m awake. i sleep with a light on, and i prefer to sleep in the day. i cannot even deal with the presences in my room.

for that matter, my room is definitely the most presence-heavy room in the house. now, although it’s obviously just in a drafty area, i feel the cold spots. all. the. time. i’m feeling one right now as i type this. the door and window are both closed. the heater is always on. the draft comes from the same corner of the ceiling my cat stares at when she’s “staring into space”. there’s definitely something there, but it legit doesn’t bother me. it watches me get dressed sometimes, but it’s not weird about it. like i said, benign.

i feel energy everywhere i go. i can’t stay in my family’s open plan living room comfortably for more than a few minutes, because that room is filled with people and pets coming and going all freaking day, and even when it’s empty, it’s so LOUD. there’s vibrations and voices coming out of the walls, because the house absorbs it all. as a generally tired person, that room exhausts me. i can only stay there if i have social energy. (yes, even an empty room.)

i am so, so sensitive to people’s moods and the energy they let out (to the point where i burst out screaming if i see a negative microexpression during a personal conversation). i find phone calls very difficult, not just because of social anxiety, but because i can’t sense energy as easily as i want to, and is natural for me. skype calls aren’t the same as being there in person. a lot of this could also be autism-related, but nearly everything about me is autism-related, because i’m autistic. go figure.

one time, the day i had my first period, i passed out in a maths exam. all the other times in my life, i’ve seen black or maybe red when i passed out, but this time it was a striking cobalt blue. and i heard SO MANY VOICES, i thought the whole classroom was full of people shouting. my P.E. teacher was observing that exam, she carried me out of the room and lay me on the floor outside. i told her about the voices, she looked at me in confusion and said “there were no voices?? the whole room was silent for the exam.” obviously that was a weird day, but given the amount of times i’ve lost conciousness in my life, before and after that day, i know the warm muggy feeling of slipping away, and i guarantee that one was just a little bit not-normal.

my cat Wilson follows me everywhere. if you’ve ever seen a picture of a witch and her familiar, that’s me and Wilson. she leaves the house if i leave, and she’ll walk down the road beside me to make sure i stay safe. she only lets me leave completely if i go in a car, but even then, she tries to come too. i know what she says when she talks. she speaks in words for me. it translates naturally in my head without a thinking process.

there was this one time when i was about 15 my parents took me to an after-hours medical centre because apparently i was ~speaking in tongues~ or whatever. i don’t remember it, i remember ‘waking up’ with a doctor’s flashlight in my eyes, crying, then holding my sister’s hand as we looked at the fish in the fishtank afterwards. i can’t say how legit that is because i just.. don’t remember it.

one time as a kid, i am absolutely sure i was possessed for about 30 seconds. i was walking down the street on a balmy English afternoon, pine needles scattered underfoot, with my elderly grandmother (paternal), my grandfather, and my sister. i must’ve been 6 or 7? and a streak of evil just bolted through me. and i stuck out my foot and my grandmother fell flat on her face. my grandfather tried to help her up, a car driving by pulled up and asked if they needed help, grandfather said no, and got her back to her feet. i can’t remember if i felt remorse. i think i just knew instinctively that it wasn’t me who did it. but like.. i wasn’t just A Nice Kid, okay, i was The Nicest Kid. i just don’t do things like that. ever. especially not to a kind and generous grandmother who i love so very dearly. i never had before, and i never have since. that’s the single most evil thing i’ve ever done in my life and it came out of nowhere. being more aware now, i think it was a djinn (aka a demon in christian beliefs, i think). they’re known for being mischievous. (my grandmother was fine, by the way. this is the first time i’ve told anyone about this.) now i think about it, i remember cobalt blue behind my eyes then, too.

whoops, this is a really long post now. but uh… basically, i’ve just always been open to feeling these things, and believing in what i sense for myself, without subscribing to whether or not the science has been done yet. in fact, i think i’m open to it because i experienced the same stuff when i was young. the energy i feel is very much real to me, completely tangible. i’ve never been able to see auras, but i feel them on some people. i think just being open to feeling something makes it more likely to come to you. i try not to ignore my instincts (because they’re always right. always.) but i find it’s super hard to distinguish between anxiety (which i feel often) and magical ability (which is far less commonly felt). also sometimes the instinct is so faint it doesn’t even become a passing thought, just a blur of something i half-considered. but in hindsight i realise what it ought to have been, had i paid proper attention.

i can comfortably manage to go outside in bare feet, shut my eyes and let the moonlight do its thing. it has an immensely powerful energy, i always feel cleaner inside when i go back in. (my cat Wilson sometimes asks me to go outside with her when there’s a full moon. almost every night, especially on warm nights, but even freezing ones, we can just stand out there for an hour together. watching the moon set is transcendent. far more so than a sunset.)

right now, due to years of bad health, i have to force some natural abilities away (like the nightmares) because they’re too much for me to handle. i think as i recover, over time it’ll be easier for me to accept that stuff back into my life.

oh, one more thing, regarding my health - i have celiac disease, which has kept me essentially bedridden for the last 7+ years - WHICH BY THE WAY, my family spent literally 9 years trying to diagnose. my doctor kept doing an anaemia test, telling me there was nothing wrong with me and sending me back to school. i saw various specialists, herbalists, a naturopath, physiotherapists, cardiologists, had an MRI scan, saw family counsellors, school counsellors, a hypnotist, etc etc - basically consulted every medical professional under the sun when a simple blood test would’ve done it. stupid misogynistic doctor who thinks all teenage girls fake it to get out of school.

but one thing we did do was visit a psychic, who told me i had something called a candida. my dad, a sceptic and nonbeliever, googled it and said it was “some kind of magical thing in the gut”, and was therefore bullshit, so we continued the search for a diagnosis. years later - years - after a change of doctor (who i chose because i got a good vibe from her picture) we find out it’s celiac disease, a disease of the gut. of the hundreds of people we saw, the only ones to even pinpoint the right body part were the psychics. i googled candida just now and guess what? literally celiac disease. this woman diagnosed me with celiac disease by kneeling at my feet, holding my hand, and shutting her eyes for 30 seconds.

for the record, slightly off topic, i know very few men in real life, and this is what the men in my life have been. my doctor, dismissing me as a liar because i was a teenage girl. and my father, dismissing my declining health as “not trying hard enough”, even now, more than a year after i was diagnosed by a doctor. i think this is why i take refuge with male fictional characters. they’re better. i want them to be soft and understanding like the men i’ve never known.

anyway, this is the part of my life’s story i never really pieced together until right now. it’s a lot, more than i expected. i happily call myself a witch. most of my magic goes into my stories, and i think a lot of people who read them feel it, even if they translate it as passion or love or good vibes or something. the amazing comments i get would speak to that. i love the energy i get from comments, because it does come through in typed words, even if it’s much fainter than seeing people face-to-face. some comments just hit me with waves of goodness, even if the words themselves aren’t so powerful. so i really appreciate that stuff. it’s good stuff.

yep. that’s all. i hope this satisfies your curiosity, anon!!!