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spirit-of-the-void · 5 years

Text

Ebony and Ivory (V x Reader Fanfic) Chapter 20

Author’s Notes: Mmmm let’s keep this shit going, yall. Sorry for the wonky schedule as always, I’m going my best

Chapter 20

(V POV)

Trish was understandably quiet as they walked toward the Qliphoth tree.

V knew she would be, especially after all he had told her about himself. About...everything. The poet couldn’t fathom why he felt the need to do so, and especially her of all people. Maybe he thought she would provide some insight, some guidance of any kind? As much as he was hoping, telling someone didn’t really ease the burden on his shoulders, or the pain of it all. The guilt, despair, and desperation were all still there, clawing its way through his chest to his throat. He felt like he needed to tell someone, but...with you, he knew it would only cause you more pain, more heartbreak. There would be no happy ending to the time he shared with you, and that alone was enough to make him hate every part of his existence.

What was he supposed to do? He couldn’t find the will to tell you. He knew what he needed to do when he reached Urizen, there would be no choice in the matter.

You always had the choice to warn her. But you decided not to, because you are a coward. You don’t want to face her pain now, when it means something to you.

You were the only comfort in his life, and he was going to hurt you like this.

Because later...It will mean nothing, won’t it?

His teeth ground a bit, hand griping his cane tighter as he struggled to keep up with the blond-haired woman. Panting, limping, exhausted. The energy you gave him had faded fast now that he was moving, not wanting to use Shadow to travel because Trish definitely wanted no part of that. It felt...wrong when it wasn’t you. She seemed in no mood to wait up for him either, and he was in no mood to argue it. The goth only wallowed in his own self-loathing, still wishing you were beside him despite how utterly selfish it felt. He was a fool, and a cruel one at best. And acknowledging what he must do to stop this calamity from continuing, to keep himself alive...it only made the pain worse to bear.

But he remained silent, Trish’s words echoing in his head.

I’m not your mommy, V. You’re a big boy—and you need to see this through. Dante’s war.

She was right, of course. He had a duty to see through, it was his mistakes that caused all of this tragedy. The fighting, the death, the blood-stained earth...it was his job to fix, despite his own wants and emotions. Despite what he felt for you. And that was what hurt most of all, the idea that in the end you would become another unfortunate victim of his bad decisions, his greed. Just like every human sacrificed to the Qliphoth tree. The thought made his steps falter a bit, eyes squeezing shut as your expression at the time he started crumbling replayed in his mind. Your shock, your horror...How ironic that now your tears would mix with the blood on his hands, burning his insides until he crumbled into nothingness.

He deserved this suffering. You didn’t.

“Does she know?” Trish said suddenly, making the poet flinch and snap out of his thoughts.

It was the first words she had spoken since they had started walking, her eyes usually forward and mouth firmly shut. V looked at her, the woman now gazing back with a frown planted firmly on her lips.

“...I beg your pardon?” He inquired, voice a little strained and hoarse. He didn’t know why he was asking...he had the feeling of who she meant.

He just didn’t want to answer this question in the first place.

Trish stopped walking, making him pause as well as she stared at a crevice stretching in front of them. The tree was close now, so close V almost gagged at the smell of it. Ash, rotting bodies, blood. So much blood. Trish winced as well, her nose scrunching up as she turned her gaze back to V once more. The woman was luckily dressed now, wearing her usual attired of revealing, tight black leather. Something about it made V heavily uncomfortable, resisting the urge to look away from her serious gaze. Or maybe that was his desire to ignore the question making him not want to stare at her?

“That girl from before,” She replied, crossing her arms over her chest and staring him down with eyes he felt could cut right through him, “Who was she, anyway? I heard enough of what you both were saying to tell she was close to you.”

V felt his body stiffen at the mention of you, that guilt gnawing at him even more now that someone like Trish was calling him out. It felt like she knew exactly what he had been thinking about, like she could sense his innermost turmoil. It was strange though, he neither expected her to notice it, nor for her to speak out. She didn’t know you at all, but her tone sounded heavily displeased. Not that he could blame her. His own actions and mission were displeasing to himself as well, a constant weight on his already aching back.

“We...met her in Redgrave,” He replied slowly, turning to meet her heavy gaze from under his own lashes. They wouldn’t protect him from her sharp glare, that was for certain, “She offered to come along and help us. And...no. She doesn’t know what I am, only... that I am falling apart. And you will not be informing her.”

Trish’s brows touched her hairline at that firm comment near the end, her eyes narrowing a bit on the poet's face. His wording definitely didn’t jive well with the woman, that was plain in her expression.

“Are you using her?” She asked in an annoyed tone, sounding as if she was promising swift violence based on his answer, “Didn’t think you were the type to stoop so low. Might not be my business but it’s cruel to lead a girl on.”

Something about the way she said that made annoyance ripple along his spine. Like petting a cat the wrong way. They were wasting time on this conversation when they should have been heading for the tree, meeting back up with you. V would be lying if he said her words didn’t sting, like daggers cutting into his chest. You were more to him that she could ever understand, so why trying defending himself? He cared about you, craved you, needed you. But...was she wrong? He was using you in a way, using your energy, your kindness, your affections. It was tearing him apart, and Trish could never understand that. But what did it matter?

He was worried about your safety, and he wanted to keep moving.

But...why couldn’t he just let it go? His jade eyes were tired, his tone defensive when he replied, “I wouldn’t dream of leading her on. What I feel for her is genuine, and I don’t have to explain that to you.”

V griped his cane, turning to start walking toward the tree again, but Trish grabbed his arm and stopped him. Why couldn’t she just let the topic drop? He turned, a scowl tilting his full lips as he met her gaze again. The pain and deterioration were making him irritable, even more so now that you weren’t by his side. All the goth wanted was to go, but Trish seemed firmly against it.

“All the more reason why she should know,” Trish made a face, staring at the poet incredulously as she continued, “You fell in love with this girl? Being half a person, crumbling like you are? And she doesn’t know? You’re going to just string her along and then leave her to mourn you?”

So many questions, all the ones he didn’t want to answer.

“Why does it concern you?” He replied, tone harsher than he intended. Closer to a growl, filled with exhaustion as his jade gaze landed on her face. She blinked, probably never seeing such emotion from the poet before, but he couldn’t care, “Does me having emotions jar you so heavily? She is everything...and I am nothing. I know what my actions will do to her, but she deserves to be happy in the time we have. She deserves her hope.”

You deserved more than him. Better than him.

Trish could only stare at the ebony haired man, the breeze sending her blond hair waving gently to the side. He was never good at reading people, and he didn’t know her very long. But there was shock in her gaze, and... disappointment. Like his words had hit a heavy chord with her. Maybe it was due to her being a woman, wanting to look out for you. And how could he blame her? Or Nico and Lady, for that matter? There was a purity to you, that gentle kindness and affection that filled a room. Trish sounded just like the other women just after glancing upon you. A motherly thing. Which seemed far too fitting, hitting him like a fist to the gut. Her expression made him feel glum, scummy. Like was being scolded by his—

Stop.

He gritted his teeth, pulling his arm away and wincing at the flecks of crumbling skin. He said nothing, but then again, he didn’t have to. Trish crossed her arms again, tilting her head to the side as she addressed him. What she spoke made his thoughts freeze in an instant, her tone almost accusatory.

“From what I heard of him... I didn’t think Vergil was capable of love.”

Well now. If hearing that name wasn’t a slap to the face.

V let out a low, bitter laugh, putting a hand to his forehead and leaning over a bit, bracing his weight on the cane. Something about the whole situation was ironic and amusing, in a very dark way. From what she heard of “Vergil”... of course Dante would have told others about his twin brother, why wouldn’t he? His words had been less than kind, obviously not praising his power-hungry sibling. Why did that sting? He had every right to paint a bad image of the man, dealing with all the things he had over the years. And V....he hated himself too, so why should Dante’s hate be any surprise?

You are a fool.

“So easily you forget,” He breathed, a bitter smirk on his lips as he met Trish’s gaze again, “I am his humanity. Contrary to what you have been told, Vergil is capable of emotion, and as for me... I can assure you I feel it heavier than you can imagine.”

V took a few steps closer to her, limping and slow. His memories as Vergil, his memories of you...he knew what Trish was thinking, and he could understand. But she could never comprehend what he was, what he felt, what he craved.

Still, he continued. His gait slow as he gritted out through his teeth, “I feel the self-loathing. The disgust. The pain. The regret.”

He stopped in front of her, panting as he observed her expression, that surprised look in her eyes as he kept his lips moving.

“The disgust you feel for him is nothing compared to my own,” He rasped, voice raw as his hand griped his cane so hard his knuckles were white, “And what I feel for her cannot compare. So, spare me the prattle—I know what Dante thinks of his brother, and he is entitled to those emotions. But neither of you could ever comprehend what she has done for me, the feelings she stirs. I do love her—I love Y/N with every part of my broken, brittle human soul. His human soul. And the idea of hurting her is far more painful than any words you could say to me.”

He turned away from Trish, caring not for the shock on her face as he started walking toward the tree once more. The conversation had exhausted him, drawing out the internal turmoil he already felt like ripping open a wound not yet healed. You were the balm on those wounds, and he had sent you after Dante. He only hoped and prayed Trish would remain silent, and let things happen as they were supposed to. Knowing everything he had hidden would crush you, hurt you, break you. And he couldn't bear to see it. He would suffer through the self-hatred, the despair and the hopelessness alone.

And you...he would give you all the love he could in the time he had, until he could give no more. It was all he could think to do, all he wanted.

Trish opened her mouth, sucking in a breath behind him like she was going to speak. V didn’t particularly care for whatever she was going to say, but the woman never got the chance.

Everything around them started rumbling and shaking.

V gasped, stumbling and slamming his cane into the dirt to try and steady his already wobbly form, looking up at the tree causing the disturbance in shock. What the hell was happening? Trish grunted, stumbling as well when the earth began crumbling away, already on the verge of collapse due to the effects of the roots ripping apart the landscape. Something had happened. Something had happened with Urizen. V couldn’t discern what yet—it could have been Nero, Dante, or the tree--it was bound to reach its peak of blood consumption at any moment.

The idea of it being Dante frightened him, especially considering he had sent you after the demon hunter. He prayed to any being that would listen that you weren’t up in that tree without him, that you were safe.

The same couldn’t be said of him.

The ground underneath him shifted, falling away suddenly and sending him into a dead drop. He let out an alarmed shout, feeling Trish’s hand firmly grab his wrist before he could plummet into the abyss below. This wasn't good, this was definitely not good. He gasped, looking down before darting his gaze up to the straining blond. She was on her stomach, struggling to hold him while the rest of the ground around her began to crack. It was too much weight, both him and Trish combined. He didn’t dare summon Shadow, and Griffon was still gone. What was he supposed to do?

He was going to fall, Trish along with him.

(Your POV)

Faster, you had to go faster.

A feeling of foreboding filled you once you reached the edge of the crevice, traveling alongside it in a desperate rush to reach V.

The ground started rumbling, shaking pieces of debris tumbling down into the abyss. You gasped, gripping onto as much as you could and launching yourself along the gaping hole to avoid falling. You were suspending in midair for a moment, closing your eyes and focusing on everything around you. Body flipping gracefully, senses alert and taking in everything at once. The tree was causing the tremor, sending the edges of cracked earth shattering in places and falling. Unstable, already on the verge of collapse before this whole god damn mess.

What the hell was going on up there? You had only been away from Dante for a few moments, but it seemed like he was up to something up in the Qliphoth.

Chaos was in control now, the dead husks of trees shaking and swaying before splintering to the ground. Your gaze whipped around, searching for anything to grapple onto with the tendrils, anything that would keep you upright. Bad, this was bad. You hopped between falling pieces of debris, heart pounding as you kept your Void gaze activated, searching for the whale oil. It was so close, so much so that it made your energy swirl in your abdomen and chest. V was nearby, but that was a fear in itself.

Everything was collapsing, and you were terrified of him falling into the abyss below without Griffon there to aid him. You had to hurry, propelling yourself along and arcing through a narrow opening between sliding pieces of the Earths plate. This was so dangerous, but you had enough time practicing on floating debris in the Void to be good at it. You wouldn’t be stopped.

It wasn’t until the horizon line was within your sights did you spot the blessed, familiar form of your poet. But even then, the relief would not come.

Your heart nearly stopped at the sight of him dangling over the edge of a cliff, Trish barely holding onto him by one arm. Everything seemed to freeze for a moment, you suspended in air, eyes ever calculated as you watched the cliff Trish was on start to crack. Ready to fall as well. Your brain was working overtime, looking at the distance between you and them, looking at the crumbling earth, looking at the drop below. Feather fall wouldn’t save you all in a drop like that, especially when it was so far down. The land was too unstable to grab onto them both and fling them to safety—there was nowhere to find purchase, no areas to latch in your tendrils. Think, you needed to think.

It was time to do something risky.

Neither V nor Trish noticed you, but that didn’t matter. You needed to be fast. You had extended your limits, and your energy was still pretty high all things considered. This was something you could handle if you timed it right and used your head—V wasn’t going to die here. You saw briefly that he was crumbling again, but you would worry about that later. Focus now. You inhaled as much as you could, letting it settle in your lungs and turn into frost as you propelled yourself over to the two, right as Trish began to fall.

You saw frustration and fear in her face, a silent shout stuck in her throat as she and V tumbled into a flat plummet. Faster, you needed more speed.

You shot several tendrils out, following their path down in an attempt to grab them. You let out the huff of frost, meeting V’s jade gaze. His teeth were grit, eyes wide as he met your stare with a shocked one of his own. You doubted he would be able to process what was happening fast enough to really take it in, but that didn’t really matter in the moment. Saving him and Trish was all that filled your head, brain going into autopilot and power taking over. The seconds passed slower when a few tendrils managed to grab them, still falling and falling into the abyss.

You sucked in another breath, reaching your hands out to grab them even as you snarled in an inhuman tone, “Open the Void’s maw...!”

Your power burst out from your lungs, words filling the air like an invocation of their own. Icy cold, gripping your lungs and organs like clawed fingers as you expended a huge amount of Void power, an ability you hadn’t tried in a long time. The ability to step through the Void, letting it chose where to take you. Risky, difficult to pull off. But the only choice you had.

A crack snapped through the area, filling the surrounding space with the dull howl of the Void. You pulled Trish and V against you in the next instant, barely managing to grind out, “Hold your breath and don’t look...!” before a fissure opened in the open air below you all, swallowing the three of you like the inky caress of a black ocean.

Taking you into the Void.

You breathed in, staring out at the familiar, hollow darkness of your Deity’s home. Wind was blowing like icy fingers over your skin, the familiar sensation making your teeth grind after being away from it for this long. You wrapped your hand over V’s eyes, not wanting him to see the place so very few souls ever had to experience. The sight of it would never leave them. If they breathed in the air here, the chill would stay in their bodies for weeks, unable to be shaken by tea or hot showers. You had long grown used to it, but the few seconds suspended in air would be the only time you allowed Trish and the poet to be there.

You could tell they both listened, holding their breath and eyes shut in the brie moments of transition. You regretted putting them both through the experience, but it was the only ace up your sleeve. Where would the Void put them out? You had no idea, you only hoped it was close to the tree. Anywhere at the base, away from the crumbling. You doubted it would screw up your “mission” so royally by depositing you further away.

But that didn’t matter now. Saving the two with you did.

You saw another fissure open in the Void, ready to move you to a different space away from the place you all had fallen.blessedly, finally. You were counting the seconds but they always felt...too long here. Warped, incorrect. You feared the other two wouldn't be able to hold their breath much longer. Griping them closer, you prepared to exit the Void the way you came. But not before you caught sight of him.

He was watching you.

The Deity stood in the distance, suspended upside down on a piece of floating debris. Your eyes widened, catching his black-eyed gaze as your body froze. You felt like you couldn’t breathe for a moment, like a child caught stealing candy from a store. His eyes were so sharp, his hands clasped behind his back and body so still it was unsettling. But his lips were curved in a bemused smile on his handsome face—was he handsome? You blinked, but the memory of his face never stayed. You couldn’t have even been sure he was smiling. But he had been watching you, that much you were certain of.

Why wouldn’t he say anything? Why had he been so quiet for this mission? Seeing him was both a blessing and a curse, you cared not for his cryptic bullshit. Not now, not when everything was so crushingly hectic.

You wanted to say something, but never got the chance.

You spent ten seconds in the Void before it spat you all out, sending you tumbling out into the real world again onto hard ground. You yelped on impact, trying to cushion V and Trish with your tendrils as best as you could, but it was a hard landing for all. Trish rolled, groaning and gasping for air after holding her breath. V did the same, breathing heavily and laying on his side next to you. Fuck, that could have been bad. But you still weren’t out of the park yet. The transition from cold, hollow air to warm, reeking stench was jarring—you immediately gagged, landing on your hands and knees and momentarily registering that the ground was wet. Fleshy. Where the hell were you?

It didn’t matter in that moment. Making sure the other two were alright was the only important thing.

“V...!” You immediately gasped, pulling the poet up with your tendrils and holding him in your arms. He gave no resistance, his forehead cold and clammy when it rested on the side of your neck, “Are you alright? What about you, Trish?”

You looked at the woman, relieved to see her sitting up on her own and rolling her shoulders. She looked a bit shaken, but not injured as she turned her eyes to look at you.

“I’ve been better,” She grunted, eyeing you warily before looking around, “What the hell just happened back there? How are we in the Qliphoth now?”

You blinked. The Void had deposited you inside the tree? You supposed that was a good thing, since it was the destination to begin with. But it didn’t shake your worry for V, smoothing some of his ebony hair back and sucking in a breath. The cracking had extended further, barely visible spider-webbing now on his face and those lips you adored so much. You hadn’t been gone that long—how had it increased this much? You were running out of time. And worse yet, you were willing to bet there would be plenty of demons in the tree. V wouldn’t hold out much longer, you couldn’t afford to waste time to rest.

V opened his lips before you could speak, letting out a weak chuckle as he replied to Trish, “Isn’t she something incredible? She teleported us into the Qliphoth.”

Your heart thudded at his praise, tendrils wrapping around his body as you replied in a shaken tone, “Void Stepping. I would have done it a lot sooner had I thought I could manage it. I wanted to save my energy for healing you, but I've extended my reach enough to manage both."

Your energy flared again, but you could tell Void stepping had taken a big chunk. More than you could afford in that moment. But you would address that later. For now, you murmured the familiar words of “From the Void, Into You” and pressed as much energy into the poet as you could.

He immediately flinched, a low groan leaving him as the familiar sensation traveled through his body. You pressed your lips to his head, not caring if Trish saw you as you tried to soothe him through it. She was definitely watching, even as she pulled herself to her feet. It clicked momentarily that she was now dressed, the outfit pretty revealing too. You weren’t sure how she found such clothes where you had left her, but that was the least of your worries in that moment.

The crumbling barely left him.

You knew when you had to stop pushing the energy, cutting it off with frantic panic growing inside of you. It bloomed like a poisonous flower, spreading its thorny vines around your heart and squeezing like a vise. Your energy had practically done nothing. He was still crumbling, even on his face. It was only lighter now, but flecks of matter were still drifting lightly from his form. Like falling snow. Like ash.

You put a hand to your lips, trying to push back your panicked breathing as he finally opened his jade eyes again. His gaze met yours, his lips parted as he relaxed in your arms. Fuck, leaving him was the worst idea. There was relief in his expression, crushing relief and guilt as he stared at you. And... adoration.

It took your breath away. You pressed a kiss to his lips, that finally making Trish clear her throat, taking a few steps away to look around the area of the tree you were in. V let out a relieved sigh, his lips feeling dry and a little bit cold as he pressed to your warmth. Like you were water and he was dying of thirst. You mimicked his desperation, but you were at least kind enough to know not to get too invested with Trish there. And with so much at stake...you couldn’t afford to kiss him how you wanted.

“We’re running out of time,” You murmured, pulling away to help him to his feet. The kiss felt far too short after how worried you were, after how dire the situation had become. But V didn’t complain, only letting out a light grunt as you pulled him up, “We should get moving. I don’t know where in the tree we are, but at least we’re here.”

“I’d say we’re almost at the top,” Trish replied to your words, making you and V turn to look at her as she approached you both, “How did you manage to move us so far up?”

If you were already at the top...Urizen couldn’t be very far. Hope buzzed in your skull, making your heart pound so hard you were sure it would burst. There was a chance to stop him, to take back what he had stolen from V. The demon seemed big on taking things--stealing a part of V, ripping off Nero’s arm...so many deaths were on his hands and it needed to be stopped. If you could meet back up with Dante and Nero, a fight could begin and his life could be saved, right?

Not yet. You can’t afford to hope yet.

You instead focused on Trish. Her eyes were sharp, making you a bit nervous as you stammered in reply, “Er...I used my abilities to move us through a space between spaces...it popped us out in an area of its choosing, one that would benefit me most. This...is the area that benefits me most.”

If you had any confidence in your ability not to over exert, you would have done it sooner. You regretted not doing so, but Christ you never imagined you and V would be separated.

Trish put a hand on her hip, staring at you as V griped his cane, leaning on it as he summoned Shadow out again. The mighty cat looked thrilled to see you, letting out a pleased purring sound and rubbing your legs. It was a small comfort amidst the chaos.

The poet let out a low grunt, putting a hand on your shoulder as he told you in that low, honeyed voice, “We need to get moving. Are you close to exerting yet?”

You knew he was going to ask that.

You frowned flexing your fingers a bit as a few of your tendrils wrapped around them, “I’m good for now. I’ll eat while we walk. You should too.”

V shook his head at that, simply offering you a weak smile as he started forward. You lifted your hands, wanting to stop him when Trish put a hand on your shoulder. You blinked turning your gaze to her and feeling a bit...intimidated. She was much taller than you, wearing a revealing bust and black leather pants. A beautiful woman, and definitely not human judging by the aura she gave off. She seemed to be sizing you up, her gaze searching as it met your own stressed, worried expression. You weren’t sure how to read her yet, this new woman who was friends with Dante.

“Leave him be for now,” The woman told you, pulling on your arm to tug you along. Walking and talking, then? You didn’t want to fall behind, so you kept in step with her, wishing you could run to catch up with the poet in question, “You and I haven’t been officially introduced. You know my name is Trish, yes. And I know you’re Y/N.”

You nodded hesitantly, not sure where she was going with the conversation.

She moved her lips closer to you, murmuring in a low tone, “And I can tell you’re not human. So, what are you? Some servant of a god?”

You sighed. Way too many people were wary of that here. But why lie now, when she clearly already partially knew the truth?

“I am,” You replied easily, seeing no point in hiding it as you stared ahead at V, “I’m a priestess. And I want nothing more than to get V to the top of the tree and help him to defeat Urizen. I swear I’m not up to no good, I just want to help the person I care about.”

The words came out almost pleading. Quiet. You saw V look back at you, a bit of worry in his gaze as it flickered between you and the scantily dressed female speaking to you. What was with that look? Trish definitely didn’t miss it, meeting V’s gaze with a challenging one of her own. The two seemed to have a small staring contest, confusing you even further as V paused his steps. What the hell was their problem, and why were they having it now of all moments?

Trish looked like she had something to say, but her eyes wouldn’t waver from V’s as she ground her teeth. The two didn’t seem to like each other, clearly having exchanged words before you met up with them. But you didn’t understand what they could have talked about to make this happen.

But Trish sighed, clicking her tongue and releasing you so she could quickly walk past V, her hair swaying back and forth as she did so. V let out a low, relieved breath, turning his face away from you and down to the ground.

What the hell was that about?

And even more alarming, you heard Trish mutter to V, low enough that she probably thought you wouldn’t hear as she slid past him.

“I’ll keep my mouth shut,” Her tone was displeased, angry as she flung the low murmurs at him like daggers, “But know that anything that happens from this point on is on you.”

What the hell did that mean?

You kept your face blank and confused, not wanting either to know you heard her. But you had, and you wished that wasn’t the case. V was still hiding something, something bad, and Trish knew about it. The knowledge was like a knife to your gut, making pain twist around until it felt like fire burning you from the inside. Foreboding filled you now, that sense of hope gone when you saw that guilty look in V’s eyes again. No...he couldn’t have been lying about his chance at getting better, could he? The very thought made your stomach do painful flips, toiling and rolling. You felt nausea building, threatening to make you retch. When was the last time you felt this stressed? There was no way to tell.

You couldn’t take it. You couldn’t stomach the idea that he was hiding something like this again.

You wanted to confront V, wanted to force the truth. But...that look in his eyes stopped you. That pain, the guilt, the sadness...he looked like hell and then some. How could you make it worse for him? What were you supposed to do? You wanted to cry, wanted to sit on the ground and bawl like a child. But that wasn’t an option. More than anything...you wanted to hug someone, wanted someone to promise you everything would be okay. But that wasn’t going to happen either, and the sensation wouldn’t leave you even as you walked forward, forcing your feet to move so you could catch up to V.

He needs you more than you need the truth.

You faked a smile, taking one of his hands in yours and giving it a squeeze as you tugged him along. You saw surprise in his gaze before you looked away from him, forcing yourself to keep your eyes forward as you walked. No more wasting time, no more waiting. His hand was too cold for your liking, his skin feeling strange now that he was crumbling again. You were so in love with him, achingly so. The fact that there was still something terrible lurking, something threatening his well-being...it made you more anxious than you would care to admit. You wanted to share these fears with V, but god it would only make things worse for you both.

But V still seemed to tell.

“...” He was quiet for a moment while you both followed after Trish, him panting a bit at the incline. He was limping still, but he seemed to be walking alright with the cane. But his tone was breathy, low and concerned as he asked you, “Are...you alright, my sparrow?”

You sucked in a trembling breath, trying to hold back every ounce of emotion. For his sake, as well as your own. You wished he hadn’t asked that.

“I...” You mumbled, tone low and hesitant, “I...I’m just worried. I feel like...something bad is going to happen.”

It wasn’t a lie. But you couldn’t elaborate. You couldn’t tell him you knew there was more to his condition than he was letting on, more to everything. And that was ripping you apart.

V sucked in a sharp breath at your words, his hand squeezing yours as tightly as he was able. You welcomed the physical touch, welcomed him more than anything. You just hoped to the Void and back that you were strong enough to keep V safe, strong enough that whatever he was hiding wouldn’t matter. You had pulled off miracles before—you were willing to break yourself to do it, to save him from this fate. The Void was mysterious and powerful, able to shape reality and time to its will and change fate itself. You might have to give up a piece to access that brilliance, but...what else could you do, in the state you were in?

V leaned closer to you, his breath shaken as he pressed his lips to your hair. Nuzzling to you, getting as close as he could without truly embracing your form with his familiar arms. Your eyes closed at the contact, a whimper born and dying in your throat before it could be released. He was killing you softly, burning you up inside. Your eyes stunned with tears that so desperately wanted to come out, but you couldn’t let them. He was so weak, so desperately weak and breaking. You were willing to hold him together as long as needed, but what if it wasn’t enough? What if you were never enough? The idea slayed you where you stood, making you want to throw up it was so terrifyingly terrible.

V’s words to you pushed the dagger in more, his voice so soft and deep. What he spoke to you was both a blessing and a curse, mingled together in a painful potion that made your throat clench with bottled up cries.

“I love you, sparrow,” He murmured, his lips brushing your forehead and breath brushing your skin. His voice was so raw, painfully so as he added, “And I will keep you safe.”

Your breath hitched, threatened to come out in a broken sob. Fuck. You were coming undone once more, heart breaking into a million lovely, sharp edges.

All that you love, you eventually lose. Destined to taste the fruits of happiness but never have your fill.

It hurt, but you couldn’t show it.

How cruel. How unfair. To finally have someone who loves you and they are dying.

You couldn’t break, not now. He needed you to be strong, right?

A pitiful creature. You truly belong in the Void, don’t you child?

The whispers of the Void were in your ear, so loud and rising in tempo. They wouldn’t stop. They couldn’t stop.

Please stop. You wanted them to stop.

Your eyes teared up, threatening to spill over as you closed them. You leaned closer to him, your cheek resting on his arm as he released your hand, sliding it around so he could hold you closer. Christ, it hurt so beautifully much. It ached in your heart, your soul, every place it was supposed to until it filled you to the brim. Like a glass with water shimmering on the rim’s edge, threatening to spill like the tears on your face. It was too much, and it was not enough—it was more than enough to make you realize just how in deep you were, like you had plunged inside of his jade eyes while he was drowning right beside you. The only problem now was both of you couldn’t seem to find your way up. And that alone threatened to crush you.

God damn it. God damn it.

How could he kill you with the very words you had so desperately wanted to hear?

Read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18136193/chapters/44161798

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Tagged: @silentwhispofhope @slightlylunatic @nightshadow4713 @just-call-me-no-name @efiicitia @raven-huntress

#devil may cry v #devil may cry #dmc v #dmc5 #dmcv #V dmc #V x reader #v x self insert #fanfic #chapter 20 #Ebony and Ivory #ebony and ivory chapter 20

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