#truly never had a dream about having dick before and have never felt like I wanted one | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

oddinary4bts · 1 month ago

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Sweet | ksj

☆request:

Congratulations on the milestone ! Can we get a Drabble of idol Jin coming back from the military and trying to sort out his situationship with the girl he left behind when he went into the military?

☆pairings: idol!Seokjin x female!reader

☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI)

☆genre: idol!au, a bit of angst, fluff and smut

☆warnings: unedited, cursing, explicit content: oral sex (female receiving), fingering, jerking off, protected sex (with mentions of unprotected sex), big dick!Jin

☆word count: 3.5k

☆a/n: i did not expect to write smut in this but here we are haha i hope you guys like this one! i had a lot of fun writing it <3

☆☆☆☆☆

It's so sweet, knowing that you love me Though we don't need to say it to each other, sweet Knowing that I love you, and running my fingers through your hair It's so sweet

Sweet - Cigarettes After Sex

☆☆☆☆☆

Seokjin hasn’t seen you in ages, his military service whisking him away from…

From whatever his relationship with you was. Not quite a relationship, but more than friendship, Seokjin thinks he was too immature a year and a half ago to understand you. But when you sent him a message two days ago to congratulate him for finishing his service, he figured he should see you.

If only so that he can give you the closure he never gave you. Because he practically ghosted you when he started his service, not replying to your messages after his obligatory training where he couldn’t touch his phone anyway.

He felt bad. Horrible even, but the distance seemed necessary after the words you last exchanged.

After you all but confessed your love for him.

It was too much too soon, or maybe he truly was just immature then. Because today, as his car is eating the miles to your apartment, he thinks maybe he was wrong. The heaviness in his chest makes it feel so, as does the rain battering his windshield.

Seokjin parks outside on the street in front of your building, glancing up to see the lights are on in your apartment. His hands turn clammy, and he rubs them on his jeans in a failed attempt to dry them.

It doesn’t work, because the second you’re buzzing him in, they become clammy again and he’s too anxious to even think about drying them again. The anxiety only keeps increasing as he climbs the stairs to the second floor, worrying at some skin on his bottom lip, and it reaches a never-seen-before high as he stops in front of your door.

He takes a deep breath to ease his nerves, thinking about the many times he was here before. That night after your first date - a blind date his friend set up for him - when you told him to come home with him.

He should have known then that it was setting your story in a way that wouldn’t end well for you, to go home with you that night.

Seokjin raises his fist, and he thinks his hand is shaking. He ignores it, pretends he’s as confident as always, and he knocks three times, lowering his hand as he waits for you to open. It doesn’t take you long - he wouldn’t be surprised if you were waiting on the other side of the door.

You’re… beautiful. You were back then, but the months apart have done you good, and Seokjin’s throat dries as he just looks at you, his lips parting on a silent vowel. You just stand there, shining like an angel as a small, shy smile lights your features, your eyes crinkling at the corners.

Seokjin doesn’t believe in love at first sight. Has never believed it, and though today may not be his first sight of you, it surely renders him speechless, his brain emptying until there’s just you.

“Hey,” you greet him, your voice like a melody conjured from a dream.

“Y/n,” he answers, and your name feels right, righter than anything before.

Your smile widens, and you step aside to let him in. He walks in, fully aware of how close your bodies are as you shut the door, but then you move back and he immediately misses your proximity.

What is wrong with him?

“How have you been?” you ask.

“Good,” he replies, swallowing. “Better now.”

He means the words. He means them more than he’s ever meant anything in his life, and he thinks you catch the meaning behind his sentence. Because blush creeps on your cheeks, and your gaze drops to the floor.

“What about you?” he quickly adds, not wanting you to feel embarrassed.

“I’m… good,” you answer, and you let out a small chuckle. “I didn’t think I would ever see you again.”

You’re direct. It’s something he’s always thought was admirable about you, but the revelation hurts, sending a pang through his chest.

“Y/n…” he trails off.

“But you’re here now,” you say, and your smile turns pained, sad.

How many sleepless nights has he caused you?

“I am,” he says, voice small. “I’m sorry.”

“I get it.” You shrug your shoulders. “You were busy with your service, it’s not like it was easy to maintain a…” You never finish the sentence, even though Seokjin waits patiently for you to say it.

For you to acknowledge that it was just a situationship, that maybe you both just played each other.

“I really am sorry, though,” Seokjin insists, looking down at his shoes. “You did not deserve that.”

You nod once, your gaze trailing to the side. “Then, can I ask… Why did you want to see me?”

His heart stops in his chest. He’s still struck by the sight of you, barely unable to form coherent sentences, but you deserve an explanation.

You deserve closure, if that’s what you want.

“I thought…” he trails off, wets his lips before continuing, “I thought you deserved closure.”

You take a deep breath. “I don’t think it’s necessary.”

He thinks you’re dismissing him. It feels like you are, like you’re telling him to leave, but he just stands there, drinking your features in.

Choking on the hurt he knows he’s caused.

“I really apologize, Y/n,” he adds, voice barely above a whisper. “You did not deserve the radio silence. I… I kind of thought it would be better for you, that you deserved better than being stuck with someone that was going to be gone for months.”

“You could have just said so…” you point out.

Seokjin sighs, his gaze dropping to the ground in shame. “I know. I was stupid, and I was immature too. Which is bad considering I’m in my thirties now but… yeah. I’m really sorry.”

You don’t say anything for a time, the silence getting heavier with every second passed. Seokjin meets your gaze, and he wonders if you can tell how guilty he’s been feeling. He thinks you might, because you wet your lips, glancing to the side, and then you say, “You came all the way here to say this?”

He nods. “You deserved better than a text message. When you texted me two days ago, it reminded me of all the good times we’ve spent together.” The truth comes to the surface, and Seokjin whispers it, afraid he’s going to scare you away. “I’ve missed you, Y/n.”

The world must have stopped turning. Time must have stopped, because you just stand there unblinkingly. He’s not sure you’re even breathing. But then slowly, like the first sun rays in the morning, a smile spreads on your lips.

You’re beautiful, too beautiful, and Seokjin can’t believe he got scared last year. He doesn’t think there’s anything scary about the woman standing in front of him.

“And you think I’ll just forgive you like this?” you ask even though you’re smiling.

It’s like a stab to the chest. His heart aches, and Seokjin doesn’t know what to reply. He’s aware he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness, but he wanted to give you his truth.

“I don’t think I deserve it, honestly,” he says. He gulps around a sudden lump in his throat, glancing around your apartment if only so that he can commit it to memory. “But I have missed you. I’ve felt guilty about it for months, but didn’t know how to approach you. Didn’t think you’d want me texting you out of the blue. I just… When you reached out, I just couldn’t let you go without at least having apologized.”

You nod, leaning against the wall as if your legs can’t support you anymore. “Thank you for apologizing.”

He reckons he’s losing you. Not that he really had you to begin with, but Seokjin thinks he’s losing you, and it hurts more than he ever thought it would.

“Of course.”

There’s another silence of lingering heaviness, and then you nod your head. Push up from the wall and walk in your apartment, sitting down on the couch. You offer him a small smile, patting the spot next to you.

“Come in,” you tell him. “Let’s catch up.”

He widens his gaze, not really believing what you just said. But then again, he knows you’re a forgiving person - he’ll make sure you don’t regret your decision.

And he doesn’t think you do. No, you spend the rest of the afternoon chatting, with you telling him all about your work and that annoying coworker that used to get on your nerves last year too. It’s easy, filled with smiles and laughs and reminiscing, and when you invite him for dinner, Seokjin decides to cook for you.

He doesn’t want you to lift a single finger for him, not when he wants to make it up to you. And he thinks he does, to a certain extent. You’re beaming by the time you’ve finished eating, telling him that you missed his food the most, and Seokjin complains that you only like him for his food. You just laugh it off, and then tell him that he’ll have to cook a thousand more meals for you.

Call him crazy, but he knows he will. He’ll cook every meal for you if that means he gets a chance with you again. One that he promises to himself that he won’t fuck up. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t make a move tonight - he tries to respect you, to respect the fact that you might need a bit of distance from him before you want to be with him like that again.

He thinks it was the right decision. He thinks it was worth the weeks of waiting before you kissed him for the first time again, in a different setting this time. At his own apartment, after you’ve had his Jajjangmyeon. You kiss softly, by the door, and Seokjin wonders if you can hear the wild beats of his heart in his chest.

You have to. Because you lay a hand on his chest right above his heart as you pull away from the kiss. You’re smiling, your cheeks slightly flushed as you look between his two eyes. And then you say, “I want you tonight.”

Seokjin doesn’t need to hear more. He cups your cheeks, stealing a languid kiss on your lips as you wrap your arms around his neck. Your fingers brush the strands of hair at the back of his head, and then you tug on them a little.

He grunts, pushing you back towards the door. He lifts you up, and you wrap your legs around his waist, bringing your heat dangerously close to his dick. He’s already getting hard, blood shooting down from his heart to his cock, and he grinds into you, swallowing the soft moan you let out.

A second later, you tease his bottom lip with your tongue, and Seokjin lets you in, getting drunk to the taste of you. He’s so high with the taste of you that his mind is elsewhere - he doesn’t know how you make it to his bed. All he knows is that, ten minutes later, you’re splayed out on his bed like his own personal feast, and the sight of your glistening pussy makes him go feral.

He kneels between your thighs, hooks your legs on his shoulders before leaning closer, lapping your juices up. You make a breathy sound he remembers from every night he couldn’t sleep during his military service, instead thinking about how much he missed you.

You taste good. You taste sweet and salty, a perfect mix to his senses that makes him forget everything else but you. He circles your clit with his tongue, teases the bundle of nerves before he goes back to your entrance, pushing his tongue in once. You moan, one hand finding his hair to tug at the strands, and you instinctively grind in his face. Seokjin flattens his tongue to let you do it, to let you seek friction on the wet muscle, and then he unleashes himself, eats you out like you’re his last meal on this Earth.

You’re panting already, alternating between mewls and moans by the time he pushes a finger inside of you, fighting against your already tightening walls. They relax when he sucks on your clit, and he takes it as an opportunity to push another finger in, curling his digits to hit the right spot inside of you.

After all, he knows he needs to stretch you out before he’ll be able to fuck you. You’re on the smaller side, and he’s… bigger than a lot of guys, so you do need the stretching. And he’s pleased to oblige, circling your clit, flicking it until your walls start spasming on his fingers. Not even a heartbeat later, you’re coming, his name on your lips in a sinful cry as he rides you through the orgasm, going feral with the sounds you make, and mostly with the taste of you.

His chin is covered with your juices by the time he sits back on his heels. He licks his fingers clean as you watch him through half-lidded eyes, and then he grabs his discarded shirt from the side - he barely remembers getting naked - to wipe his face dry.

You’re naked too. A literal goddess sent from above to grace him with your presence. You’re everything he could have ever wished for, and he still can’t understand how stupid he was last year.

To think he could have had you during the rare breaks from his service…

He was stupid. Stupid, foolish and everything in between, but at least he’s here with you now.

“Wow,” you let out, a small chuckle falling from your lips. You’re visibly fucked out, yet you still manage to rock his world as you reach for his dick, giving him a squeeze. “I want you.”

Shit.

“Are you sure?” he asks, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as you start stroking him.

“So big…” He grunts at your crude words. “Yes, I’m sure. I’ve been thinking about sex with you for weeks, Jin.”

He looks around, searching for his pants. They’re over by the door, a lot farther away than he imagined they would be. It feels far, too far, considering he’s already nestled between your legs.

“What?” you let out, and you grip him tighter.

He feels it in his balls. He hasn’t had sex in forever - you being the last one before his service - so obviously he knows he won’t last. He’s so horny he thinks he’d be able to come all over your stomach if you keep jerking him off. But he stops you, gently wrapping his hand around yours to restrain your motions.

“Baby,” he breathes out. “Shit, let me grab a condom.”

“You don’t want to fuck me raw?” you tease, biting at your lower lip. “I haven’t had sex with anyone since you.”

The words please him far more than he thought they would. It feels like, maybe, you were his all this time too.

He says your name like a warning, but you only smirk mischievously.

“Afraid I’ll get pregnant?” you add. “Don’t you think we’d make pretty babies?”

You would. He knows damn well you would and it wouldn’t even be because of him. It’d be all you - your beauty is incomparable.

“As much as I want to get you pregnant one day,” Seokjin replies, moving away from you. He misses your hand on him the second you let go, but it’s for the best. “I don’t think we are there yet,” he continues. “But I promise I’ll fuck babies into you one day.”

You close your thighs instinctively at his words as if you’re still searching for friction.

As if you didn’t come on his tongue just a minute ago.

It doesn’t take Seokjin a long time before he’s put a condom on, discarding the package in the trash can next to your bed. You’ve just been watching him, and he kneels back between your legs, his balls already tightening in anticipation.

He rubs his tip on your folds, collecting the glistening juice. Your mouth falls open on a silent moan, especially as he moves to your clit. One of your legs twitches from oversensitivity, or at least he assumes it’s because of that, and he aligns himself with your entrance.

“Let me know if it hurts,” he tells you.

“Don’t you remember how well I could-”

Your words are cut short as Seokjin pushes in, your walls sucking him in slowly and surely until he bottoms out, some of his dick still sticking out of you. You just look at him, eyebrows furrowed in pleasure, and Seokjin licks his lips, saying, “You were saying?”

“I’ve missed this.”

Your words ring in his mind, on and on, erasing everything that he is to build him anew, to build him in a way that finally allows him to be with you. His heart fills with warmth, exploding like fireworks, and he bends down to capture your lips in a kiss that means more than words ever could.

He doesn’t move for a while, warming his cock in you while he just keeps on kissing you, not even stopping for breathing. It’s like he doesn’t need it - hell, he thinks all he needs is you. And you kiss him back with so much passion he thinks this is it, he’s reached nirvana.

The feeling perseveres as he slowly pulls his hips back, before pushing forward again, the motion making his entire body tingle with pleasure. He swallows your soft moan, grunts in your mouth as your pussy clenches on him. Your hands are on his back, in his hair, and the second you pull on the strands again, he lifts his head, meeting your gaze.

“You feel so good,” you praise, eyes sparkling.

He smiles softly, pecking your forehead, and then he kneels back to take in the sight of you as he slowly fucks into you, spearing you open. The sight of your pussy swallowing his dick is indecent in the best way, and he progressively increases the rhythm, making sure not to hurt you.

He wouldn’t forgive himself if he did. So he fucks you gently, faster and faster but never hard, not until your hands find his thighs, your nails digging into his skin. He grunts then, swearing underneath his breath, and then says, “I really don’t want to hurt you.”

“Jin, it’s okay,” you let out. You smile, wetting your lips. “Just fuck me.”

He lets out what could be considered as a whine, and then his motions grow rougher. He stops himself after a few thrusts, and you meet his gaze, looking slightly annoyed that he stopped.

“You have to tell me if it hurts, okay?” he says as he cups your cheek.

You smile softly, nodding once. “I will, I promise.”

Once the reassurance is finally uttered, Seokjin finally lets himself go, fucking you like his life depends on it. You’re soon moaning loudly, and he has half a thought that his neighbours might hear. But then again it turns him on even more to know he’s the one making you scream like that, and he’s soon moaning with you, praising you as he slowly feels his climax nearing.

But he wants you closer when he comes. Wants to feel you in his arms, to feel his skin on yours. So he leans forward again, caging you between his arms as he keeps fucking you into the mattress. Your nails soon scratch at his back, leaving marks he knows he’ll have to hide but can’t bring himself to care about.

“Fuck, Jin,” you moan, and his head drops in the crook of your neck.

“I’m going to come,” he says, and you wrap your arms around his neck, holding him close as the high finally hits him, and he releases loads and loads of cum in the condom.

He thinks he’s floating. He’s just a leaf floating away on a small lake, unbothered by the world. His whole body feels so light, and the only thing tethering him to the present is your arms around his neck.

He’s never come this hard before.

“You okay?” you ask as you rub his back.

He grunts, trying to lift his head but failing. “Holy shit.”

You laugh lightly, and the crystalline sound is what finally brings him back down to Earth, what has to be minutes later.

“Wow.” He chuckles, pecks your lips. “That was amazing.”

You smile, your fingers drawing idle shapes on his back. “It was.”

Seokjin meets your gaze, taking a moment to observe the feelings swirling behind your irises, deep in the depths of your eyes. The emotions are like northern lights, swishing and shining and more beautiful than anything he’s ever seen before.

This time, Seokjin doesn’t get scared. This time, he takes the emotions in, knowing that they are reflected in his own gaze. And though you haven’t told it to each other, he knows that you love him.

And more than that, he knows that he loves you, too.

☆☆☆☆☆

hope you guys liked it:) let me know what you think about this one shot! love y'all <3

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theemporium · 1 year ago

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[8.3k] the five times you tried to deny it, and the one time you and quinn gave into the bond pulling you together. (smut included)

based off this. smut included but it's not explicit. i may write a more detailed smut one shot in this universe later.

series masterlist

The first time you shared a moment with Quinn Hughes, you truly thought you were out-of-your-mind insane.

You weren’t even five years old when you first met the Hughes family. Your family had just moved, you were new to town and you were just confused why your whole life had to be packed up in boxes (no matter how many times your parents explained it).

And somewhere between the tears of being unable to find your favourite teddy in the cardboard boxes and not giving in to your parents’ bribes that you now had your very own—and fairly big—room in the new house, you had met Luke Hughes.

It was indescribable the way the bond between you and the youngest Hughes boy just snapped, but it was the only way to explain it. One day you were moving to a scary, new place and the next you were attached to the hip with an awkward, little boy who you loved like family.

Where Luke went, you followed.

When you jumped, Luke was right behind you.

You were a package deal, never one without each other. And it had always been the case. You were best friends. You shared something that went deeper than friendship and blood. You were each other’s person, and there was no doubt about that in anybody’s mind.

Your family became Luke’s and, in turn, his became yours. Ellen was a strong, empowering figure in your life that felt like a second mother. Jim was kind and encouraging, guiding you through some of your lowest moments. Even Jack felt like an older brother, someone who teased you and taunted you but defended you if anybody else tried to do the same.

But with Quinn, there was nothing.

For years, you were just his annoying little brother’s annoying little friend. And when you grew up, he was so focused on hockey that your paths rarely crossed, even with the countless amount of time you spent under the Hughes’ roof. You reached high school, he was already off to college. And when you and Luke got into Michigan, Quinn was already settled in Vancouver and playing in the big leagues like he always dreamed of.

He was by no means an asshole or a dick to you, your relationship with the oldest Hughes brother was just…non-existent. He was just there in your life. He was Luke’s oldest brother than you sometimes saw around, and nothing more.

You didn’t think that would ever change over time, let alone in the span of one summer.

There was no question that you would join the Hughes family at their lakehouse in the summer the second you finished up with finals. You had decided to spend some time back home with your parents before you joined the boys at the lakehouse, just as the friends started to fly in and it felt like it would be the same as every other summer.

You were painfully wrong.

Despite only just arriving, you should have known better than thinking the Hughes brothers were capable of a lazy day. The second your bags were dropped in your designated room (just beside Luke’s at the end of the hallway), they had dragged you out onto the boat and demanded to make up for lost time.

You laughed until tears were streaming down your cheeks. You ate until you swore you’d explode if you had another bite. You drank until the beers started to make you feel a little buzzed and settled and content. You sat around the dinner table sharing jokes and stories and random thoughts until, one by one, everyone tapped in for the night.

But not you.

Despite the travelling and the tiring day you had, the exhaustion in your bones wasn’t enough to settle you. You felt restless. You felt wide awake. You didn’t have the heart to lie in your bed and aimlessly stare at the ceiling. So, with the knowledge that Luke was already out like a light with no hope of waking up until the sun rises, you found yourself sitting on one of the chairs outside by the fire pit, the dying embers your only company as you enjoyed the serene silence of the lakehouse.

At least, they were your only company until he followed you outside.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

You turned your head to look away from the slowing fire and towards the lakehouse, where you found the eldest Hughes brother walking towards you. He had changed from the clothes he was wearing earlier, the shirt and shorts now replaced with sweatpants and a hoodie. Your lips twitched upwards when you noticed it was a Devils jersey he probably stole from his brothers, and one he probably wouldn’t dare to wear outside the privacy of the lakehouse.

You shook your head before nodding back towards the house. “What about you? Luke’s snores too much to deal with?”

Quinn breathed out a laugh. “We both got the short end of the stick sharing a wall with him.”

“You can say that again,” you murmured with a snort before you turned to face the fire pit again. “At least it’s peaceful out here.”

“And cold,” Quinn noted.

“I think that hoodie is keeping you warm enough,” you mused as he closed the distance to the firepit, now standing behind your seat. You almost jumped when you felt him place the blanket over your shoulders, not having even noticed he was holding it when he came out here.

“I meant for you,” Quinn stated simply before he took the spot next to you, his shoulders brushing against yours as you both sat there, staring at the dying fire. “You’re not even wearing a jacket.”

“Sorry, dad,” you joked, and maybe it was a trick of the light, but you could have sworn you saw his lips twitch upwards. “It’s fine, I was heading back inside anyways.”

His brows furrowed together as you moved to stand up. “You looked quite settled though.”

“Well yeah,” you started, your cheeks burning as you noticed him nodding for you to continue. “I don’t know, I just thought you wanted to sit out here.”

He blinked. “So you were gonna leave?”

“I’ve had my time. I’m not gonna get in the way of your…silent brooding,” you said with a shrug of your shoulders.

He tilted his head to the side before he spoke. “You don’t have to leave. We can…silently brood together.”

This time it was your brows that furrowed together.

“Unless you don’t want to stay out here with me…” Quinn trailed off, a little awkwardly.

“It’s not that, it’s just—” you started, pausing for a moment before you shrugged again. “We don’t really talk.”

Quinn frowned. “We talk.”

“Quinn, this is the longest conversation we’ve had in six years,” you pointed out to him. He opened his mouth like he was about to counter your statement, but after a few moments it seemed like he realised you were telling the truth.

“Okay, maybe that’s true, but…it doesn’t have to be anymore,” he said as he patted the spot next to him, the spot you were sitting in a few minutes ago. “I mean, you’re like family”

You hesitated for a short moment before you settled in the spot next to him. It took a few more seconds before you finally had the guts to lift the end of the blanket, offering it to him with a sheepish smile. It took every single part of you burning with hope that it was too dark to notice the way your cheeks burned a little as he happily accepted the blanket and wrapped it around himself too.

“Up until junior year in high school, I thought you hated me,” you confessed, blurting the words out before you had a chance to stop yourself.

“What? Really?” He questioned, somewhat incredulously before he frowned. “What changed?”

“I realised you were just like that with everyone,” you admitted. “You all have your roles. Jack is the hyper-active golden retriever brother. Luke is, like, a black cat. Kinda keeps to himself, but he’s clingy when he trusts you.”

Quinn hummed, his eyes focused on the side of your face. “And me?”

“The grumpy cat,” you said as you turned to look at him, your voice a little breathless as you continued. “You look like you hate everyone, but you probably love the hardest. I’ve seen it with Luke. You act like he annoys you but…you probably love him more than anyone else in the world.”

“Other than you,” he noted.

You grinned a little. “Oh please, we aren’t on the same level. I mean, you can try to compete but you’ll lose.”

Quinn snorted, and it took you by surprise. “Yeah, you and my brother have your weird…psychic thing. I don’t think anyone could compare.” He paused for a few moments before he spoke up again. “You know, he threatened me about you once.”

You let out a noise of disbelief. “What?”

“The bond between you,” Quinn laughed.

Your eyes narrowed in suspicion. “When?”

“It was when you broke your arm when you were like seven years old,” Quinn said. “You were bummed that whole summer.”

“It was meant to be the first year me and Luke could go tubing alone,” you murmured as the memories flashed through your mind. You hated every second a camera was pointed at you and the massive cast on your arm.

“I won this massive bag of sour patch kids at that carnival game and I knew they were your favourites,” he continued. “But Luke threw a tantrum. He cried to Dad that I was trying to steal his best friend, that I was bribing you. He said that if I gave you the bag, he would push me off the boat when Dad was going full speed.”

Your lips parted as you let out a surprised laugh. “Oh wow,” you murmured with a shake of your head. “That bastard robbed me out of a huge bag of sour patch kids.”

Quinn laughed, shaking his head. “That’s all you took from that story? Not the fact that he almost killed me?”

“Eh,” you shrugged. “You’re here now, aren’t you? But you know what’s not here? The bag of sour patch kids.”

“It was really good,” Quinn mused playfully as you lightly dug an elbow into his ribs. “Ouch. Kidding.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I’m really not,” he confessed before smiling softly. “I’ll get you another to make up for it.”

You sighed dramatically. “It’s not the same.”

“What? You want me to win it again?” Quinn questioned, though you could hear the amusement in his voice.

You wiggled your eyebrows. “Scared you’ll fail?”

“Absolutely not,” Quinn announced before offering his hand. “Fine. Deal.”

“Deal,” you repeated as you shook his hand.

But neither one of you pulled away. You sat there, huddled under the tartan blanket he had taken from the linen closet on the second floor, staring as you held onto each other’s hand. You could have pulled away. You should have pulled away. But some part of you kind of liked the feeling of his large, warm hand engulfing yours.

“You sure I won’t steal you away from Luke?” Quinn murmured, his eyes watching your face closely.

You smiled softly. “Depends how big the bag is.”

And he laughed, finally pulling his hand away as he turned his attention back to the firepit, and you were left wondering what the fuck just happened between you and Quinn Hughes.

…

You shared many moments with Quinn Hughes after that night, but the second time it really hit you again, you had no doubt that whatever was happening between you both was definitely a mutual feeling.

It was one of the hottest days of the summer, so it only made sense to take the boat out on the lake. With a backpack full of snacks and suncream, along with a cooler packed to the brim with water and beer bottles, you were set to have a good day.

Despite the heat, you had been wearing one of Luke’s old UMICH shirts as an overdress as you sat on the boat, pressed against him as Quinn took charge of driving. For reasons that were beyond your own understanding, you hadn’t opened up to your best friend about the growing friendship between you and his brother. You didn’t know why. You knew it wasn’t really a big deal.

But some part of you wanted to keep the bond bubbling between you and Quinn just for yourself, a secret shared between you two.

“Twenty bucks says Trevor tries to do a backflip before Jack,” Luke murmured to you as you both watched the other two boys, already playfully shoving each other.

“An extra says his heels hit the back of his head when he does it,” you murmured back, your lips twitching when Luke let out a loud, sudden laugh that caught the attention of the other boys.

“Quinn, they are doing it again!” Jack called out.

Luke frowned. “Doing what?”

“Being you,” Jack retorted, causing the youngest Hughes to roll his eyes.

“Stop being jealous, Rowdy,” you teased, flashing him a mocking pout. “Just cause you and Trevor wish you had what we have.”

“What we have is better,” Trevor insisted.

You and Luke shared a look before you both replied, “sure, Jan.”

“God, that is weird,” Cole murmured, sitting on the other side of you and Luke with an oddly curious expression.

“Wait until you see them move in sync,” Alex grumbled, his nose scrunched up. “It’s creepy.”

“I can’t believe we are on a boat with a bunch of jealous bitches,” you mused to your best friend, who only snorted in response.

By the time the boat had been anchored and settled, it took less than three seconds before most of the boys were jumping into the lake. Luke had tried to drag you in with him, but you batted his hands away. You should’ve known better than to think he would give up.

You only had enough time to shriek when Luke lifted you in his arms, not thinking twice before he threw you off the edge before following. By the time you broke through the surface, he was already laughing his ass off with the majority of the other boys.

“Dick!” You laughed at him.

“You still love me!” He called back.

“Unfortunately.”

You made your way towards the boat, kicking your legs to get you away from Luke as quickly as you could. You reached for the small ladder, your hands gripping the metal as you tried to pull yourself back up onto the boat.

“Here, let me help.”

You didn’t get a chance to respond before Quinn’s hands were wrapped around your waist, practically hauling you back onto the boat with ease. Your cheeks burned as you stumbled into him, your hands on his bare chest as you found your footing.

“Sorry,” you flashed him a sheepish smile.

But he didn’t look that bothered. “No worries at all.”

You glanced down at Luke’s shirt you were still wearing when he had thrown you in. It was absolutely soaked, and now laid heavy against your skin as you gently picked at the hem.

“Asshole,” you muttered under your breath. “I didn’t bring anything else.”

“I have a hoodie you can borrow,” Quinn muttered out, far too quickly and, for a moment, you wondered if the pink on his cheeks was a blush or sunburn. “If you want.”

“I—yeah,” you eventually stuttered out. “That would be great.”

It hasn’t even been purposeful. It just made sense to peel the wet shirt over your head, hoping to wring it out and let it dry in the sun while you swim around for another hour or so. You didn’t even think twice when you wiggled out of it. You didn’t think it was a big deal until you lifted your head and found Quinn staring at you, lips parted and hoodie held aimlessly in his hand as he gaped at you.

“You good?” You questioned as though your heart wasn’t racing in your chest at his eyes on you.

“Yeah, no,” Quinn cleared his throat, blinking a few times. “Just…yeah.”

You raised your brows. “Never seen a girl in a bikini before, Hughes?”

“Never seen you in one,” he corrected, and something about his response caught you off guard. Maybe because you weren’t expecting him to admit it. “You’re gorgeous.”

You tilted your head to the side. “You sound surprised by that.”

“What?” His eyes widened slightly. “No! No, I didn’t mean like that—”

“STOP BEING A CHICKEN AND GET BACK IN HERE!”

You glanced over your shoulder, your eyes narrowing down at your best friend. “I’m not a chicken!”

“Prove it then!” Luke called out.

You turned back around to look at Quinn who hadn’t torn his eyes away from you. He looked like he wanted to say something, maybe even finish what he started a few moments ago before he was interrupted. But in the end, he couldn’t find himself able to say a single word.

You didn’t turn to look back at him as you raced back into the water, your stomach churning. Maybe it was the curiosity of wanting to know what he was going to say. Maybe it was the surprise that Quinn of all people couldn’t get his words out. Maybe you were still trying to navigate the weird shift in dynamic between you.

Or maybe it was because Quinn Hughes called you gorgeous and you couldn’t stop thinking about it.

But, for what it was worth, you still slid his hoodie over your head when you got out of the water. Even if the shirt was dried by that point.

And you could’ve sworn you saw him smile when you did.

…

The third time was undeniable. You felt something for Quinn Hughes, and it was reciprocated.

It was another sleepless night. Something in the air felt different, like it had shifted. And now you were left alone in the quietness of the lakehouse somewhere in the early hours of the morning.

The days had started to blur into each other, passing in a happy daze as you basked in a summer spent with some of your closest friends. Today had been no different with made-up tournaments of pool and darts, tanning by the lake and drinks shared that put a hefty dent in the supply from the fridge.

You were buzzed and happy by the time you made your way to the room, finding yourself in Luke’s room before the boy eventually dozed off somewhere between your rambles of who could actively fight a horse-sized duck and the latest season of your favourite show you had been convincing him to watch. You had slid out of his room, heading towards your own room to settle down for the night.

But that restless feeling returned.

Instead, your steps lead you down the stairs and into the kitchen. You had propped yourself on the island, a glass of water sat beside you and your eyes focused on the window above the sink. It was quiet. So quiet. And some part of you resented it, that you were the only one awake right now.

But just like last time, you were quickly disproven of your assumption.

Your head turned when you heard footsteps approaching and, for a second, you thought maybe it was Luke. But the steps didn’t sound heavy enough to be his, and there was nothing in this world that could wake that boy from his slumber.

You shouldn’t have been surprised to find Quinn standing in the doorway instead.

He was dressed like he had just crawled out of bed. With grey sweatpants that laid low on his hips and a white shirt that clung onto every crevice and curve of his torso, he stood in the kitchen doorway with bleary eyes and a small frown on his face.

“Why are you still awake?”

You shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“I’m starting to think you have insomnia or something,” he murmured, running a hand through the messy curls on his head, but it did little to tame them. Your lips twitched at the sight. “Or maybe I’ve just never noticed how shitty your sleep schedule was before.”

“Kick a girl when she’s down,” you mused playfully as you watched him lean against the frame. “Why are you awake right now? You look like you’re seconds from falling asleep.”

Quinn hummed in agreement. “I’m a light sleeper.”

Your brows furrowed together. “So?”

“So, I heard you thumping down the stairs and into the kitchen,” Quinn said, the corners of his lips lifting when he heard the noise that left your lips.

“Thumping?” You repeated with a scoff.

“Thumping,” he nodded in confirmation before pushing himself off the frame, closing the distance between the kitchen entrance and the kitchen counter you were currently sitting on. “You’re very heavy-footed.”

“I’ll be sure to remember that the next time we skate together,” you grumbled, your eyes glued on the oldest Hughes as he sleepily shuffled towards you. Your legs parted almost instantly as he settled between them, his hands on either side of you as he looked up at you with a slight hazed look on his face.

“You’d never catch me,” he murmured softly.

“Is that a challenge?” You retorted.

Quinn shook his head as he breathed out his nose. “Do you have to turn everything into a competition?”

“It makes things more fun,” you told him, painfully aware of how close you were. It wasn’t like the boat, there was no one else in the kitchen. Just you, Quinn and the accompanying silence of the lakehouse. You wondered if you should have felt guilty for enjoying it so much.

“I can think of a million other things that are more fun,” he countered, his head tilting to the side as he lifted his head to look at you.

A beat passed before you replied, “want to show me some?”

You didn’t miss the way his eyes instantly dropped to your lips. You felt something deep in your stomach twist in delight, in satisfaction even. His eyes lingered there for one, two, three seconds before his eyes met yours again. They were darker, a little more awake than they were minutes ago when he shuffled into the kitchen. They made your chest feel tight.

“I can’t,” he murmured, his voice a little breathless and strained. “You’re Luke’s best friend.”

“And you’re Luke’s brother,” you countered. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“I shouldn’t,” he insisted.

You leaned forward a little, your nose brushing against his. “But do you want to?”

There was a pause. It was brief and barely lasted a few seconds, but it felt like a lifetime passed between you both. You sat on the counter, Quinn standing in front of you, and the deafening silence that surrounded you both. It didn’t feel like you were in the kitchen, let alone the lakehouse. You were in your own little bubble, weighing up the consequences of what was about to happen.

And in that little bubble, every single one of them seemed worth it.

A small noise of surprise left you as Quinn leaned forward, his hands moving to cup the back of your head as he pressed his lips against yours. You melted into his embrace embarrassingly quick, your hands resting on his chest as you found your lips moving against his. It was hesitant and a little off-pace, like both of you were trying to figure out what you were doing.

And then he pulled away, just enough to catch a glimpse of your face but it was short-lasting before your hands were fisting his shirt and pulling him in for another kiss.

The kisses became more confident, more sure. His hands dropped from the back of your head, gliding down your back and resting on your hips before he was pulling you towards the edge of the counter. You wrapped your legs around his torso, your arms following suit around his neck and, fuck, who knew kissing Quinn Hughes could be so addictive?

“Shit,” you breathed out, your head falling back as his lips trailed along your jaw and down the column of your neck. His beard scratched against your skin, tickling and teasing and your legs tightened around him. “Quinn.”

“Sound pretty when you say my name,” his words vibrated against your skin, his hands tightening their grip.

“That feels good,” you whined, your body arching into him as his teeth grazed along a sensitive spot on the base of your neck. Your heart was beating against your ribs, the coil in your stomach was tightening as his hands teased the hem of your shirt and the painful realisation that it had been far too long since a guy had touched you made you eager to keep him close.

“Yeah?” You could hear the cockiness in his voice. “I make you feel good, sweetheart?”

“Quinn,” you murmured, your cheeks flushing in embarrassment when he pulled away to look at you.

“Say it,” he said, his fingers squeezing your cheeks together when you tried to turn your head away.

“You make me feel good,” you whispered, a little breathless.

His chest moved with soft pants, his hooded eyes dropping down to your red, swollen lips. “Do you want me to stop?”

You shook your head.

“Words, baby,” he murmured, his fingers squeezing your cheeks again as you stared at him with wide eyes. “I want you to be sure of what you’re doing.”

You rolled your eyes. “I know I wanna fuck you, Quinn, I’m not some stupid little kid anymore.”

“I never once thought you were,” he said simply, and before you even got the chance to reply, his lips were pressed against your again.

You didn’t remember much about the journey to Quinn’s room. All you knew was that he was strong—really fucking strong—which shouldn’t have surprised you for a professional athlete. But when he had the strength and control to pick you up with ease and walk up to his room on nothing but muscle memory as he made you whine and squirm in his grasp, you had to find it more than a little impressive.

Your back bounced against the mattress as you pulled him down, eager to feel the weight of him on top of you. You weren’t exactly what you felt for the oldest Hughes brother. You weren’t even sure if you wanted to know.

But in that moment you wanted him. You wanted him on top of you. You wanted him inside of you. You wanted him in a way you had never wanted Quinn Hughes in your life, and maybe if you weren’t so lost in your own desperation to feel his skin against yours, it would have freaked you out.

But right now, your focus was on him.

Your clothes laid abandoned in a pile on his bedroom floor, right beside his sweatpants and shirt. His hands were all over you, touching you and stroking you and holding you. His lips trailed over your bare skin, desperate to kiss every fucking inch like his life depended on it.

And when you felt his curls tickling your skin, his beard scratching against your inner thighs and his nose nudging against your sensitive clit, your need to feel him inside you was almost unbearable.

“Please,” you cried out, your fists clenching the navy bed sheets beneath you as you squirmed under his grasp. “Quinn, I need—”

“I know what you need, honey,” he murmured, his lips and chin still wet with your arousal as he trailed kisses up your stomach and between your tits before his lips claimed yours. “Gonna give you what you want.”

The noises you let out were muffled by his lips against yours, his tongue teasing along your bottom lip before sliding into your mouth. Whispered pants and soft praises were shared between heavy kisses as Quinn ripped open the foil, his forehead pressed against yours as he whispered how good you were doing before he finally bottomed out inside of you.

Your experience with men in bed wasn’t large or extensive, but no one had ever treated you the way Quinn Hughes did. He was generous and caring. He was attentive and passionate. He was bigger than anyone you had ever slept with before. And even in the quiet hours of the lakehouse and the slow roll of his hips, he had you pressing your face into the pillows to muffle the noises you were making.

And much to your surprise, he held you against his chest when it was all over, rather than letting you slide out of bed and awkwardly scramble to leave the room.

“Quinn,” you started, your head tucked under his chin as his fingers trailed along your bare back.

“Yeah?”

“What are we doing?”

Quinn didn’t say anything for a few moments. “We’re just having fun,” he said eventually as his arms tightened around you. “Let’s just enjoy it, yeah? Don’t think about it too much.”

So, you didn’t. You just kept the million and one questions you had to yourself and enjoyed the feeling of falling asleep in the arms of Quinn Hughes.

…

The fourth time wasn’t even purposeful, it was more like chance—like fate.

The storm had taken you all by surprise. It was by no means a large storm, or particularly concerning. But it left the lake unassailable and most of the roads to the nearest town at risk of being flooded.

The weather warnings had been going off for the last twenty four hours. You could feel the storm approaching, you could feel it in the sticky, humid air that clung onto your skin like a second layer. The little sundress you had been wearing was doing little to combat the heat, especially with the additional fact that you were pretty sure the AC stopped working a few hours ago and the fans the boys had set up around the house were doing nothing but blowing hot air at you.

What wasn’t surprising was the lack of concern for the storm. It would pass in a few days, and none of the boys seemed particularly on edge at the fact the roads would be closed and they would essentially be trapped in the lakehouse for the next week or so.

Nobody but Quinn.

“I’m heading out to the store to stock up for the storm,” he announced as he entered the living room where the rest of the group had been sprawled over the couches, their attention focused on the tv screen displaying the video game they were currently playing. “Any of your assholes wanna help?”

Silence.

Quinn sighed loudly. “Should have seen that one coming.”

“I’ll join,” you said, not thinking twice as you stood up from your spot on the loveseat you were sharing with Luke.

The boy’s attention perked up the second you stood up, his brows furrowed together as he watched you saunter towards his brother. “You’re willingly going to the store with Quinn?”

You paused, your brows furrowed together. “Yeah?”

“It’s over an hour away,” Luke said as you continued to stare blankly at you. “He’s going to bore you to death! He doesn't talk!”

Quinn scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Geez, thanks.”

“I’ll survive,” you assured him, ruffling his hair as you walked past him and towards the front door. “Plus, I’ll talk enough for the both of us.”

You felt like your heart was in your throat as you slipped your shoes on, waiting to hear the sound of Luke following you to the door. You expected to see him running towards you and Quinn, a frown on his lips as he muttered about coming to help because he would feel bad otherwise.

You tried not to think about how badly you didn’t want him to do that.

“We are leaving now!”

“Bye!” Jack called out from the living room.

“You sure you don’t wanna come?”

“Not a chance!” Luke called out this time.

You could barely bite back your grin as you quickly rushed out the house, making your way to the passenger side of Quinn’s truck. He didn’t say a word as he settled into the driver’s seat, key in the ignition and engine roaring to life as he reversed out the driveway and started the hour commute to the nearest grocery store.

“Okay, spill.”

You turned your head to face the boy, your eyebrows furrowing slightly in confusion. “Spill what?”

“What twin telepathy, voodoo magic you pulled back there,” Quinn said with a small snort of laughter. “The dude has been attached to your hip since you both were five. There was no way he just chose to stay back.”

“Maybe he’s finally getting sick of me after all these years,” you teased.

“Yeah, and I heard pigs were flying too,” he deadpanned.

You grinned. “Is there a reason you want to get me alone, Mr Hughes?”

His lips twitched upwards as he cast you a look. “I think it’s the same reason you were begging me to not stop last night in the—”

“Shut up!” Your cheeks burned, though you couldn’t help but laugh a little when he did too.

The journey to the store went smoothly. Despite Quinn’s insistence that he didn’t speed, you reached the grocery store in the next town over less than forty minutes after you left. You each took a trolley before ransacking the aisles, filling both carts up to the brim until you had enough to supply you through the zombie apocalypse.

Quinn swiped his card and you packed the groceries into the back of the truck.

And then, the rain started.

“Shit,” Quinn murmured, a frown on his face as he ducked his head down to watch the rain heavily pour down. “They said it wasn’t gonna start up until tonight.”

“Do you think we’ll be able to get back fine?” You asked, listening to the rain patter against the roof of the truck. “Maybe it will ease up.”

Quinn raised his brows. “It’s the start of the storm. It’s only gonna get worse.”

“You scared of a little rain?” You teased, gently nudging your elbow against his.

“It’s just stupid,” Quinn said with a shrug. “It’s a nuisance.”

“It’s fun if you let it be,” you retorted.

Quinn turned to face you in his seat, a look of amusement on his face as he leaned against the console. “Sweetheart, I think you’ve been around Luke too long. The brain cells are starting diminish as we speak—”

“Fuck off,” you laughed with a shake of your head. “See, this is what I mean. You’re the grumpy cat.”

“And what about me is so grumpy cat right now?” Quinn questioned.

“You’re a rain buzzkiller,” you stated simply.

Quinn tried to fight the grin growing on his face. “And what would someone who’s not a rain buzzkiller be like?”

He waited for your reply. He waited for you to come back with some witty retort that would piss him off and thrill him all at once. He waited for you to say something that made him want to roll his eyes and kiss you all at once.

He waited, but instead he saw your hand reaching for the door handle and his eyes widened in realisation.

“Baby—”

But you were already jumping out of the car.

It was just instinctive for him to jump out and follow. He was soaked in seconds, the rain still heavy and unforgiving and it almost made it difficult to see you, despite only being a few feet in front of him. He opened his mouth, ready to yell at you for being so reckless and to get back into the car, only to stop short when he heard you laugh.

“Come on, Huggy!” You called out to the boy, your arms extended out to the side as you tilted your head back up to the rain. “Don’t be a buzzkill!”

“You’re insane!” He called back.

“Tell me something I don’t know,” you laughed as you reached out for him. “Come on, don’t leave me hanging!”

“We are going to get sick!”

“Oh well!” You laughed, palm facing the sky as you grinned at him through the heavy rain.

Quinn stared at you, a noise of disbelief leaving his own mouth as he took your hand and let you tug him towards you. Your arms seamlessly wrapped around his neck, just as his hands fell to your waist. And as much as he tried, he couldn’t fight the smile that grew on his face as you both began to sway back and forth in the rain.

“Isn’t this fun?”

Quinn shook his head, not bothering to answer as he dipped his head down to press his lips against yours. Your arms tightened around him, a small moan leaving your lips as he pressed your body against his own. You were both soaked to the bone, clothes clinging onto you but that was the least of your concerns.

“I’m taking that as a yes,” you murmured against his lips.

“You take it as whatever you want, baby,” he murmured back before he leaned down for another kiss.

The upcoming storm and truck full of groceries were the last thing on your mind when you were kissing Quinn Hughes in the rain.

…

The fifth time hurt like a bitch.

There was no sugar-coating. There was no exaggerations. There were no molehills made into mountains.

It just fucking hurt and there was no way for you to get around that.

After the storm had gone and passed, the group were eager to get back out into the world they were cut off from for the week. It had been Trevor’s idea to have a night out in the next town over. To have an excuse to dress up and head to one of the bars, enjoy the vibe of live music and chatty bartenders and friendly locals.

And that was exactly what you all had done.

You dressed up. You booked the taxis to the bar. You did a round of shots. You made friends with strangers. You danced and laughed and sang along with the band playing on the small, makeshift stage. You ordered fruity cocktails that you missed during your stay at the lakehouse. You were having fun.

And then you saw it.

Logically, you knew you didn’t have any reason to really be pissed. He wasn’t your boyfriend. You weren’t his girlfriend. There had never really been a talk of exclusivity, but you thought that much had been obvious since you had spent most of your time at the lakehouse. There were no labels, no promises, no rules. You knew that. Of course you fucking knew that.

But it didn’t make the sight hurt any less.

Quinn was leaning against the bar, a wide smile painted on his face as he chatted away to some blonde girl who was all but saddled up next to his side. He was laughing and talking animatedly and just…it hurt.

It hurt because it reminded you that you were in no place to feel hurt. It hurt because you realised nobody else would understand the bitter feelings bubbling in the pit of your stomach. It hurt because the summer had shown you a new side of Quinn Hughes, and now you had lost him before you had even really had him.

“Hey, you good?” Trevor questioned as he threw his arm over you, bringing you close to his side.

“Hm? Yeah, just…think I drank too much,” you said as you dismissively waved your hand. You tore your eyes away from where Quinn stood at the bar and smiled softly up at the blond. “I think I might head back. I’m not feeling it anymore.”

“You sure?” Trevor frowned. “We can get you some water or—”

“I think I just need my bed,” you smiled sheepishly. “It’s fine. I can go by myself.”

“Absolutely not,” Trevor scoffed before his head darted up, his eyes narrowing as he tried to glance around the bar for someone in particular. “Where the fuck is Baby Hughes?”

“Trevor—” You started, but the boy wasn’t having it.

“Huggy! Have you seen your little brother anywhere?” Trevor called out to the oldest Hughes, and you wanted the world to swallow you whole right there and then.

Quinn looked at you and then Trevor. His eyes glanced at the arm still comfortably wrapped around your shoulder, the way you were tucked into his side. For a moment, you thought he was jealous.

“No, why?” He asked, his face remaining mostly blank. “Is something wrong?”

“Lady Hughes wants to head back to the lakehouse,” Trevor informed him.

Your nose scrunched up. “Lady Hughes?”

“You’re a lady and basically a Hughes,” he said with a casual shrug of his shoulders. “It works.”

You snorted.

“Are you okay?” Quinn asked, stepping away from the blonde at the bar as his eyes glanced over you.

“Peachy,” you replied with a strained smile that only made his concern grow. “Look, it’s fine. I’m gonna order an uber and head back to the house. I’ll be fine.”

It should have been fine. You messaged Luke that you were heading back early. You had ordered an uber and Trevor insisted that he would wait outside with you until it arrived. It should have been fine.

Except the boy had the bladder of a squirrel when he was drunk and was running back inside to go to the bathroom, promising he would be quick, and giving the oldest Hughes brother an opening to step outside the bar with you.

Alone.

“What’s really wrong? You hardly drank anything,” Quinn said, his arms crossed over his chest and his worry evident in his voice. And something about it just pissed you off more. Something about his concern for you just made the sight of the blonde under his arm sting a little more, like salt in the wound.

“I’m just not feeling it, okay?” Your response was snappy, and maybe if you weren’t two shots and a cocktail down, you would have felt bad.

“Woah,” Quinn scoffed and shook his head. “Sorry for caring.”

And then the word vomit really started. “Do you really care?”

The defenceman frowned. “What?”

“Do you really care, Quinn? Because it didn’t look like you cared about much inside there other than the blonde you have been chatting up all night,” you commented coldly.

Quinn stared at you in disbelief. “Is this what this is about? You’re going back to the house because you’re jealous I’m not paying attention to you all night?”

You scoffed. “Oh wow.”

“Am I wrong?” He snapped back at you.

“Yes! Deeply so,” you gritted through clenched teeth, and you hated the way your eyes watered with tears of frustration. You didn’t want to cry, and certainly not in front of him. “I just thought—”

“You thought what?” Quinn questioned, his hands now resting on his hips.

“I thought what we had was worth a little more,” you eventually spat out, with every ounce of self-control working to keep your voice from sounding too shaky. “That maybe you’d have a little more decency than to just flirt with some girl right in front of me.”

“We aren’t dating,” was his only response.

“Yeah, I know,” you replied bitterly as the car you ordered pulled up beside you. You reached for the handle, already hating yourself a little more when you felt a tear run down your cheek. “I just made the mistake of thinking you were a decent fucking human though.”

He called out your name but you didn’t give him a chance to respond as you slid into the backseat of the uber car, slamming the car door shut and letting the tears fall as the driver pulled away from the sidewalk where Quinn still stood.

…

The one time you two acknowledged the mess between you was the start of a new chapter in your life, the start of Quinn Hughes playing a predominant and recurring role for the first time ever.

It was the following day after the night at the bar. The boys had returned somewhere after three in the morning, after the bar had presumably closed and they had been kicked out. You heard them coming in, heard their drunken giggles and horribly loud hushed voices. But you didn’t have the energy to do anything but lay in bed and listen as they all scrambled off to their own rooms.

Your sleep had been shit. Your thoughts had been running wild. And by the time the first rays of light were starting to peek through your curtains, you dragged yourself out of bed and downstairs to the kitchen. You found the biggest mug you could find, filled it to the brim with coffee and made your way to the pier outside.

It had been quiet, serene even. The sun was beginning to peak over the horizon, painting the sky in different shades of orange, pink and blue. The birds were chirping, the wind was breezing in the early morning chill and it should have been perfect.

But it wasn’t.

It shouldn’t have surprised you that he followed you out to the pier. Quinn Hughes seemed to have a nab for knowing when you wanted to break the serenity and silence of a moment.

You didn’t say a word to him, you didn’t even turn to look at him as he settled in the spot next to you and stared at calm water in front of you. You stayed locked in the silence, letting the sounds of branches rustling and distant boat motors accompany the quietness between you.

It made you want to scream.

And then, he spoke.

“Nothing happened between me and the blonde.”

You didn’t say anything, but it seemed like Quinn wasn’t waiting to hear your response. Instead, he continued talking. He sounded frazzled, like the words were pouring out of his mouth and he couldn’t stop them.

“It wasn’t—” he paused, shaking his head. “It couldn’t even be like that even if I wanted it to. You asked if I cared yesterday, but do you wanna know the truth?”

You remained silent.

“The truth is that ever since the night at the fire pit, you’ve been stuck in my head. You’ve been stuck in my head and no matter what I do, I can’t fucking seem to make it stop.” He let out a dry, humourless laugh. “You’re my baby brother’s best friend. I shouldn’t be fucking thinking about you like that.”

Quinn shook his head. “But I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t stop watching you. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. And then I kissed you, and I knew I was fucked. Absolutely fucked because now I wanted the one thing I shouldn’t be allowed to have, so I fucking panicked and told you it was nothing because if I told you, then maybe I could trick myself too.”

You finally turned your head to look at the boy, the conflict and doubts clear in your eyes but Quinn seemed to have a knack at reading you better than most people.

“Baby, I couldn’t stop caring about you even if I tried,” he whispered, his voice cracking a little as he flashed you a sad smile. “We aren’t dating. We never were. But maybe it just scared me how much I…wouldn’t mind if we were, or we had, or—” He shook his head. “I was a dickhead yesterday and I’m sorry.”

“You were,” you said and something in his chest eased from just hearing your voice. “But I was a bit of a brat too. I should have—”

“We were both idiots,” Quinn murmured before laughing softly. “Like, really fucking dumb. But I know I care about you. And not just in a ‘we are sleeping together’ kind of way. I care about you more than that.”

You wanted to say you felt the same way. You wanted to tell him the way your stomach flipped whenever he touched you. You wanted to tell him the way your heart stuttered when he smiled at you. You wanted to tell him you were addicted to his touch and obsessed with his kisses.

But all that came out was, “what about Luke?”

Quinn’s brows furrowed together slightly in thought. “We don’t have to tell him. Not yet, at least.” He said, hesitating for a short moment before he extended his hand out to you, palm facing the sky. “How about we just try us for a little bit?”

Your lips twitched upwards. “And what is us?”

“Whatever you want it to be,” he assured you. “Call me whatever you want, baby. Your boyfriend, your boy toy, your sugar daddy—” He laughed when you playfully shoved him. “I mean it.”

“Boyfriend has a nice ring to it,” you admitted in a shy voice, your eyes on the water below your feet.

Quinn grinned. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you grinned back as you finally turned to look at him. You glanced down at his hand before taking it, intertwining your fingers together and squeezing softly. “I want to try us.”

“Then we’ll try us,” he murmured before leaning forward to capture your lips against his.

And somewhere, deep down inside you, you knew it was wrong to keep it hidden from Luke. He was your best friend. He was your person. He was Quinn’s brother. He deserved to know.

But maybe you also deserved to keep a secret or two from Luke. Maybe he didn’t have to know every single detail about your life. Maybe you deserved to have some fun.

Maybe you deserved to give Quinn Hughes a standing chance, just you and him and whatever the fuck ‘us’ would lead to.

#quinn hughes #nhl #vancouver canucks #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes x you #quinn hughes x y/n #quinn hughes fic #quinn hughes one shot #quinn hughes smut #nhl x reader #nhl x you #nhl x y/n #nhl fic #nhl one shot #nhl smut

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aaron-romave · 1 year ago

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My Only Sunshine

It was a quiet night in Gotham, when suddenly the coms crackle to life, with a voice, that seemingly none of the bats recognized. That is all but one. Damians blood ran cold as he heard something that should not be possible. He had never even let himself think about it, because even recalling the mere memory of it would shatter him.

The other night, dear

As I lay sleeping

I dreamed I held you

In my arms

Batman's voice was the first to come over the coms “oracle who is this? Where are they?”

“I’m working on it B.” She crackle back in her slightly mechanical disguised voice.

When I awoke, dear

I was mistaken

So I hung my head and I cried

Oracle may not have known where it was coming from, but he did. He knew it as he knew the heart beating in his chest and the air within his lungs. Without thinking he leapt off the building, grappling across the city that his father loved, but he has never thought of as his true home.

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray

He was vaguely aware as Batman cried out for him, but that didn’t matter. His blood was rushing too quickly through his ears. Any protest or question simply ignored. He had somewhere he needed to be, and he needed to be there now.

You'll never know, dear

How much I love you

Please don't take

My sunshine away

“Oracle location!”

“I’m trying B! But these people are good I can’t work faster than I am!”

Was the last thing that came over the coms before he reached up and muted everyone, everyone but the voice he was focused on. The world had narrowed down to the wind whipping past him, his heartbeat in his ears and the one voice that he had wish to hear again for so long.

I'll always love you and make you happy

And nothing else could come between

His lungs burned as Wayne industries came in to view. Why? Why of all nights was he on the outskirts of the city? He needed to move faster, faster, please be fast enough. He begged to himself, to whatever god was out there be fast enough ….and for him to be there for this not to be some sort of cruel trick.

But if you leave me to love another

I’ll support you as you follow your dreams

It was him. It had to be him. only he knew to sing it that way. His brother quietly singing and holding him as he silently cried. He was never good enough for grandfather, he will never be good enough to be the heir to be excepted never daring, hopeing to be loved, but it was never like that with his brother. His brother loved him more than anything, and he couldn’t stop anything as grandfather ran his sword through the heart of the one person he truly loved. Through the heart of Damien’s one weakness.

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray

Even at the end, when his brother knew grandfather was coming for him, his too kind brother never forced him. Always giving him a choice and he had failed his brother when he was willing to give up everything for someone as weak and pitiful as him. He wasn’t strong enough to run. He wasn’t strong enough to protect the one person who loved him above all else.

You'll never know, dear

How much I love you

Please don't take

My sunshine away

He was so close three minutes out. Almost there the highest spot in the city, the best place to see the stars.

Northstar, I’m so happy you made it out. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there with you.

My Northstar please stop blaming yourself. This was my choice. It was always my choice and I don’t regret a second of it so neither should you. You are without a second of doubt the best thing to have ever happened to me.

Damien felt a pit open up in his stomach. Less than two minutes to Wayne enterprises

You have to let the others in Northstar. Being family to them, loving them it’s not replacing me or dishonoring me. Quite the opposite Northstar it’s keeping me alive; In a different way, but I’m still with you.

Go on brother adventures with Dick, try things that make you uncomfortable, but know that he will keep you safe.

Spend time with Babs in the library, read books that let you travel to fantastical worlds that we could never dream of.

Go to Jason for advice. You two are more alike than you even know, lean on each other, use that.

Try photography with Tim. Take pictures of all those animals that you love.

Less than one minute

Pull pranks with Stephanie. Let yourself be a kid and laugh at stupid and dumb things.

When things get too much go to Cass for quiet and understanding.

Go to Duke and ask him to take you out shopping at a regular store or to go to the mall to buy a toy for yourself. Enjoy the normal quiet moments.

Go to Bruce for comfort, he is Batman but he is also our dad don’t forget that, let him be a dad.

The world went blurry. There is no one on the roof.

Northstar I’m gone. I really am gone. You know how magic is Northstar your big brother had a few tricks up his sleeve, but I’m afraid this used the last of it. In the future in the far, far, far, future when you come join me in the hereafter, I’ll be waiting for you with open arms. I love you, Northstar now let our family love you in my stead.

As his feet made contact with the roof of Wayne enterprises a small, glowing object made it self known in the center of the roof. It appeared that stars itself littered and sprung from the object, beckoning him forward.

He was vaguely aware of the rest of the bats and birds joining him on the roof, but that didn’t matter. All that mattered was that his shaking hand was reaching out to grab the old dog stuffed animal as the last glitters of Stardust left the plush.

A drop of water fell down and landed on the left ear of the love worn dog. Reaching up and touching below the domino he realize that he was crying. When did that happen? When was the last time this happened?

As he clutched the dog plush to his chest, a frivolity that would have never been allowed in the league, but still his brother who he loved most in this world snuck it in for him. Hiding it behind a loose stone in the wall. Bringing it out for him to hold as his big brother comforted him and told him stories of a better life that they could have.

The demons heir, Robin, Damien sobbed, cried for the injustice of the world, for his brother who even waiting for him in the hereafter was still looking out for him.

His body shook as wave after wave of agony and despair ripped through him. Years of repressed grief tore through his body sharper and with more deadly aim than any blade. The floodgates had been opened. His big brother had given him this one last gift.

So when Batman, his father, his dad crouched down in front of him concern showing through his usual stoic expression he does not ignore what his brother has given him and leaps forward, clutching onto his dad and weeping for the brother that he lost and the son his dad will never get to know.

( inspired by this)

youtube

#dp x dc #dc x dp #demon twins au #Sort of #Big brother Danny #so yay my first fic to ever escape the just an idea phase #And it was because I was in a sad mood #So enjoy me somewhat constructively using my sadness for fics #Use this as a prompt if you want to continue the sadness #dp x dc prompt #Using writing as therapy #damian wayne #danny phantom #Danny al ghul reincarnated as Danny Fenton #The timelines match up because of clockwork #And because I said so #Clockwork let’s Danny send one message to Damien #Youtube

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isagrimorie · 10 days ago

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I’ve been watching video reviews praising Agatha All Along, and while I more or less agree with their points, one thing that bothers me is the claim that Agatha remained 100% evil, and she didn't change, and that doesn’t sit right with me.

Agatha didn’t have a redemption arc (or as Schaeffer put it, “This lady did not arc out.”), and I understand why. In fact, I love that about her character. The show doesn’t try to sand down Agatha’s sharp edges. I love that Agatha can feel so deeply while still being unapologetically a dick.

But the reason it bothers me when people claim that Agatha didn’t change is because she did.

To put it into context, for a character who hasn’t changed and remains firmly on a villainous path, the reviewers should look at another comic book show that aired at the same time: The Penguin. While it’s not an exact comparison, there are notable similarities: both main characters love purple (sorry, Oz, I mean plum), have a fascinating, wide-eyed, unhinged brunette antagonist, a teen sidekick, and a ruthless quest for power. But there are key differences between Agatha Harkness and Oswald Cobblepot.

The Penguin is the story of Oswald’s rise to power as Gotham’s crime boss. Agatha, on the other hand, was already at the height of her power and villainy. Over 300 years, she killed fellow witches, schemed, and connived. This all came to an abrupt halt when Wanda trapped her in a hex. With the help of Rio and Billy, Agatha eventually clawed her way free from Wanda’s distorted spell.

Initially, it seemed like nothing had changed for Agatha.

But Agatha did change. The Agatha Harkness of three years ago—the witch killer—wouldn’t have sat around a campfire trading stories and feeling emotional about it. She wouldn’t have felt any remorse for accidentally killing Alice.

(It’s funny how, between Rio and Agatha, Agatha reminded me more of Dream than Rio. Both are capricious and prone to holding grudges. Both were held captive by mystical forces and when freed, they denied they had changed—even though their captivity altered them in both small and profound ways. In the end, both characters die because of their capacity to change and are reborn, metaphorically or literally, wearing white.)

I appreciated that the show didn’t dull Agatha’s sharp edges. She was, and remains, a killer. Even when we get glimpses of Agatha’s tragic backstory with Nicky, the show doesn’t excuse her actions. She was a killer before Nicky, during her time with Nicky, and after Nicky. In fact, she became an even more prolific serial killer after Nicky. Her contempt for fellow witches deepened every time they fell for her road scam.

So, it’s tiring hearing that “Agatha didn’t change.” The ending of Agatha All Along made it clear that while she didn’t change—because such a drastic shift can’t happen in just nine episodes for someone with a 300-year history—there was, as Jac Schaeffer put it, progress.

Agatha never considered the consequences of her actions. For example, when she tried to avoid harming Jennifer Kale back when she was a rootworker and midwife, she inadvertently hurt Jennifer for a century.

Agatha spent her life trying to fill the gnawing black hole inside her, running from pain and avoiding anything resembling personal growth. She finds the Darkhold, and she becomes invisible to Rio, her remaining connection to her life with Nicky.

And, even when the world around her burned, nothing truly touched Agatha Harkness—until she found herself in the Hex, facing off against the Scarlet Witch.

Agatha was overconfident. Armed with her vast knowledge and the Darkhold, she thought she was invincible. But she miscalculated, becoming powerless and losing three years trapped in Agnes the Nosy Neighbor's life.

This disruption in Agatha's pattern is enough that when Agatha was about to restart her Killing Game, it gave Agatha pause. When Alice shows up at her house hoping to visit the Road, only to end up dead in Agatha’s basement.

There was even a moment when Agatha went to recruit Sharon Davis as a replacement backup Green Witch, she had to take a moment to confirm to herself that she could live with killing Mrs. Hart.

Agatha’s story (for this season, at least-- because there will be another season or sequel, dammit) wasn’t a redemption—nine episodes isn’t enough to atone for 300 years of killing. It's a story of moving Agatha into a position to transform. Or, as Jac Schaeffer called it, progress. Redemption may come later, but progress isn’t linear. For someone who is an unrepentant killer and con artist, even the smallest shift is big.

Agatha All Along doesn’t try to make Agatha into a hero, nor does it attempt to soften her sharp edges. Instead, the show offers a nuanced portrait—a reminder that even an unrepentant bad guy can evolve, even if they don’t fully understand or accept it themselves.

Agatha Harkness might not be “redeemed” but she isn’t the same either.

#thinky thoughts #tv: agatha all along #agatha harkness #the story positioned agatha into a path #if she would take it or not is all up to agatha #100% THAT witch

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holybibly · 9 months ago

Note

https://www.tumblr.com/holybibly/742925107577667584/i-will-be-sharing-my-thoughts-with-you-during-a?source=share

I really love reading this 🙈

if it's possible can you tell us about the rest of the members possessiveness

Thank you 🥰⚘️

Hey honey, of course, I'll talk about Wooyoung and Yeosang now, and I'll make a separate post for Jongho, Hongjoong and Yunho.

Wooyoung has always wanted to find true love. He wanted to love and be loved in return, to give himself completely to his beloved, and to devote all of his time to her. Wooyoung could choose any role he wanted just to get what he wanted, and when he saw you, he realised that he had found exactly what he had been looking for. You were sweet, simple, and gentle, and easy to read. You blushed and felt embarrassed under the intense gaze of his fox eyes. You laughed and had fun with him, and you were just such a super cosy and warm home girl.

The perfect girl for his home.

Little by little, he became more and more intrusive and possessive, changing the role of the sweet, cheerful guy to that of a dark seducer who would lure you into his bed and bite you until you were bleeding.

"You look so good with my marks; I want to mark you all over so everyone can see you're mine."

"I'm going to fill you with my cum, and you keep it nice and warm in your little pussy. Wait for me at home like a good girl."

"I never want to let you go; you're so warm and soft around my dick. I want to stay inside you forever."

"Come on, baby, accept my love; let me make you so beautiful and so swollen with my children that you will always be at home with me."

He was so annoyed by your wanting to go somewhere, wanting to see friends, wanting to spend time outside of his bed, that it made him aggressive and rude.

"Can't you be with me, or are your friends more important? Or are you such a whore that you can't live without wanting someone else to look at you?"

"Why can't you just look at me and don't pay attention to someone else? Haven't you already found someone who can fuck your slutty cunt?"

"You don't need anyone but me; I want you to be home all the time. You are all mine.".

Yes, Wooyoung was always in search of true love, one who would be perfect for him and his home. So, my dear, before you let yourself be carried away by the movement of a luxurious fox's tail, think twice about whether you will be able to get out of the dark and deep fox's hole alive.

Yeosang was full of beauty and splendour. He was mesmerising. A flutter of the eyelashes and a sweet smile were enough to kill you instantly. You were no exception. God, Yeosang really was the perfect guy—the kind of guy you always had in your dreams. He was respectful, gentle, caring, and so attentive to you. He always made you feel truly loved. Yeosang was very gentle with his words, and slowly but surely he put the ideas that he wanted into your head.

"Aren't you so lucky to be in a relationship with me?"

"Look, no one else has such a good-looking guy; they might be jealous of you."

"I am always going to take care of you, my love. You don't have a need for anyone, just a need for me."

The further your relationship developed, the more evil appeared in Yeosang. His beauty made him arrogant and rude towards you, constantly hinting that he had condescended to you and that you were just his pretty thing. Yeosang destroyed your self-esteem and lust for life by making you submissive and obedient to all his wishes.

"Can anyone but me want such an insignificant whore like you? You should be grateful for the attention I give you."

"Look at you, whimpering and squealing as I fuck you. Keep quiet and take everything I give you, like an obedient girl."

"You will always belong to me, even with this sad, tear-stained face, because there is no one else who needs you apart from me."

You've heard what they say: True evil is truly seductive. And yes, Yeosang, with his puppy eyes and angelic features hiding an arrogant, cold demon, was the most seductive of all. So be careful when you dream of a cute guy with an ideal appearance. If you bite into a piece of him, you can be sure it will rot.

#ateez smut #kpop smut #atz smut #ateez hard hours #ateez unholy hours #smut #ateez scenarios #ateez au #ateez x reader #yeosang smut #ateez fanfic #kang yeosang smut #wooyoung x reader #wooyoung smut #jung wooyoung smut

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bunnyboyjuice · 10 months ago

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Workplace distractions

Hiromi x black reader, Office Sex, nicknames( Doll and Pretty girl)

Hiromi being obsessed he couldn’t dream of it in love pfft he’s never had time for that. But something about you god, he couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw you. You were the cute new secretary of the office specifically to help with Hirguruma’s wing off the office. He had to get used to you dashing all around the place to help others but your presence was comforting. Always checking in on Hiromi before you went on lunch break to make sure he needs anything or wants anything while you go out for lunch, When your peeked your pretty head through the door of his office to tell him his 9’o clock appointment was here, the way you had a candy bowl on your desk letting people stop by and chat with you about the mundane tasks of work.

Hiromi thought it was ridiculous that you were on his mind so much. You practically had his mind in your clutches his heart fluttering thinking about the way you helped him organize his files, until he bumped into you spilling coffee all over the front of your shirt. “I’m sorry so let me go to the kitchen and go get some paper towels.” He said before jogging over the kitchen he felt like a fool but he had to tear his eyes off of that transparent stain on your shirt exposing your lace bra to him making his ears flush red. “What did the rest of the set like do you have any other set you like to wear?

Those thoughts were racing through Hiromi’s mind as he handed you paper towels to clean yourself up with. “Again I’m truly sorry I should’ve been paying more attention.” His tired voice hit your ears and you felt your knees buckle. “Yea it’s no problem at all Mr. Higuruma.” You say with that sweet smile Hiromi loves. You had no idea the way you were affecting him and vice versa for Hiromi.

That why he had to have you bent over his desk.

Plap! plap! plap!

The sound of skin smacking against skin filled the room as your plump ass smacked against his pelvis. Your plush thighs tremble under the weight of Hiromi’s eager thrust. His dick hitting that spot that made you light headed and see stars. “FuckFuckFuck..Mr. Higuruma!” You whined feeling his cock stir up your insides. “Mmmmgh t-to much!” You manage to garble out feeling Hiromi’s dick sink deeper into your cunt feeling it squeeze around him like a vice. “C’mon pretty girl you can do it you’re already taking this much now.” He chuckles slapping your ass watching your pussy drool all over his dick before slamming right back into you making you moan.

“That’s it Doll keep making all that noise for me.” Hiromi grunts his hips rutting in a sloppy pace as your whines and moans fill the room, rolling your hips back against him greedily “You’ve never felt this good huh princess,doesn’t it feel good?” His voice slurred drunken from lust. “What a nasty fuckin girl you are getting all messy from my cock huh.” He groans loving every second of this. Your pretty manicured nails clawing at the desk trying to get a hold of yourself. You feel a bubbling sensation growing warm in your stomach the heat running rampant over your body.

“Hnngh..I’m close Higuruma!” You squeak your glassy eyes rolling to the back of your head feeling Hiromi snake his fingers between your thighs rubbing them on your clit. “C’mon doll you can do it come f’ me.” He huffs feeling his orgasm on the rise as well. You nod feeling your body growing warmer feeling that warm gush already leaking before you climax. You feel that coil in your stomach growing tighter and tighter the pressure bubbling up inside you, your vision going fuzzy as you squirt soiling the floor beneath you both. You can feel he wasn’t to far behind as he fucked you through your orgasm making you hiccup and whimper while he continued pounding into you feeling your juices soak into his slacks his eyes fluttering feeling you squeezing around him. “That’s it’s Doll..such a messy..hnng..girl!” He groans feeling his impending climax coming as he rolls his hips lazily feeling those spurts of seed filling you up.

You mind feels hazy as you feel him sit you on his desk to clean you up with tissues his had in his drawer. “Sorry Doll I got carried away.” He say wiping at your thighs. “What about dinner on me?” He says fixing your blouse buttoning it back up. “That would be nice but I thought it was the other way around dinner first and you fuck after.” You say with a slight giggle. “I mean I could’ve did that but it wouldn’t have been interesting.” Hiromi muses as he presses a kiss to your forehead.

A/N: Guys I’m so sorry this took so long I’ve been working hard in school but I’ll be back with new fics I promise and my inbox is open so send stuff in

#jjk fanfic #jjk higuruma #higuruma smut #higuruma x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kasien #hiromi jjk #jujutsu kaisen hiromi #higuruma hiromi #hiromi x reader #jujutsu kaisen higuruma #higuruma x you #hiromi higuruma #hiromi smut #kota's brain #jujutsu kaisen fanfic

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breakyourrxles · 2 years ago

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❥hedonism (m)

↳ Spring break with your boyfriend Jisung was supposed to be relaxing, except for the fact that you desperately want to fuck his best friend, Changbin.

han jisung x fem!reader, seo changbin x fem!reader — friends with benefits, drama, porn with plot, explicit sexual content. [10,2k wc] cws: infidelity!! themes of sexual incompatibility, bad decisions, alcohol consumption, penetrative sex (protected), rough sex, dirty talk, praise, Changbin has a Big Dick, play possessiveness.

Jisung was kind.

Kind is enough, isn’t it?

Really, Han Jisung was so much more than the absolute, resounding kindness that he showed you, and everyone else, equally. He was attentive — so interested in you and everything that made you, you. All of your bizarre, niche interests, Jisung was always there to listen. In the early months of the relationship, many late nights were shared together talking about your goals, your futures, your dreams — both individually and in a potential state of togetherness. An almost blind, hopeful optimism that he showed that admittedly; you hadn’t shared, but being with Jisung changed you in small ways. Very particular ways. Ways that you thought made you a better person.

For yourself. For him, maybe?

A man that physically, perhaps strayed a bit from your usual type of interest. Not bad, far from ugly, but not the usual visual appeal that would have piqued your interest in an instant. You considered that this was perhaps a bit of the oil on the proverbial flame of your love for him, and you did love him — quite early on, at that. Only weeks into the relationship, that the L-word was dropped from your lips — holding hands and stargazing one humid, summer night. Jisung reciprocated with what felt like the absence of a second thought about it, as if he had already known long before you had, and still, only weeks into your partnership with him.

Within the throes of the honeymoon stage, everything seems surmountable — if even paid the smallest modicum of acknowledgment to begin with.

But you loved him. You loved the way he smiled at you and was tirelessly into you and all of the quirks that came with. It was easy to discuss the future with him; timelines for marriage, kids, careers…all of the future life goals that would result in the make or break of any relationship. The concept of “insurmountable”, never an issue with Jisung. He was on board with you, with anything that resulted in you.

And in the bliss of new relationship energy, it’s easy to miss the warnings — when someone looks at you with all of their love and adoration, sometimes it’s easy to tell yourself, “we can get past this,” about anything. Everything, even. “We can work through that,” “it’s not a big deal, I can live with that.”

You always want for it to be true, and we’ll do everything to make it such. Everything to compartmentalize our wants, our needs. We tell ourselves that no one will ever, truly, be perfect — that we will always have to give something up for all of the other shining attributes of someone.

Jisung could never make you come.

It wasn’t necessarily inexperience, at least, not based on his tellings. Not a lot of experience, but plenty — and the same for yourself, you knew how to make yourself come, and ultimately, that’s always what it would come down to. In the beginning, hours could be spent in the attempt; a ready and absolutely willing partner, trying to learn the ins and outs of your body and preferences, only to fall flat every time. Multitudes of failure eventually beginning to weigh heavy on him — not by his own admission, but you could tell — sessions began running shorter and shorter, with less emphasis on attempting to reach a place that was seemingly unreachable altogether, for him.

The two of you gave up talking about it, supplemented with toys. Both of you happy enough with the arrangement — but neither thrilled by it.

Spring break rolls around the corner and Jisung tells you that he and seven of his guy friends are renting a large home for two weeks — partying and lounging and other such debauchery to take place, you sigh and smile at him — Jisung’s youthful enjoyment of the world always being such a bright spot to your otherwise regular outlook on the world around you. It’s not that you were negative, or dull — Jisung just shone so brightly in comparison. It was a light that you never wanted to see go out, and to the best of your ability, this was your goal.

And you loved him, as he loved you — what else could there be?

Around the eight month mark of your partnership, Jisung invites you out to dinner with all of the guys he would be sharing a place with for the upcoming weeks. Most of them you had already met in smaller groups or circumstances; Jisung conning them into third wheeling a date of yours that you later had to apologize for, and your wonderful, hopelessly optimistic boyfriend having only realized the error of his ways after the fact. Naturally. It was so Han Jisung of him.

Gripping tightly to his hand as the two of you enter the establishment — a large BBQ joint halfway across town — a bit closer to where the shared home would be, but not far out from your own apartment, either, Jisung strokes your thumb with his own in an effort to share his positivity with you through contact. He pushes the door open and motions for you to enter ahead of him, only whispering “it’ll be fine, don’t worry, you know most everyone already, just be yourself” as you walk by him. Smiling at the words, you catch eyes with one of the friends you are familiar with, and thankfully, the one that you had gotten along with the best, as well.

“Get over here already,” Minho says, quickly standing upon seeing you and shouting across the restaurant, so loudly that it’s almost embarrassing. “We’ve been waiting!”

“You know Jisung takes forever to get anywhere,” you respond when you finally reach the large table, reaching towards the man and hugging him as a hello.

“Hey!” Jisung retorts, but unable to refute the claim. He instead opts for introducing you around the table. “You know most of these dummies already, but the two you haven’t met—” he pauses to point at them, as if you’re incapable of the process of elimination yourself. “Seo Changbin, Kim Seungmin”

“Nice to meet you,” you say, and the two of them allow for the same in response.

Everyone is kind, which you expect. You don’t take Jisung for the type of man who could involve himself with the type of people that weren’t — despite all of the varying personalities present, everyone was more than happy to welcome you — include you, invite you back to the house to show you around. You explain that you have work in the morning and thus can’t, but that you’re sure you’ll be over soon, and everyone begins talking amongst themselves about how to plan for the welcoming party, as if you were moving in, or something. It’s heartwarming, being so welcomed into a group of strangers.

Jisung’s hand moves to your thigh as he sits next to you, laughing with his friends, and squeezes it lightly — affirmation that he’s there and he’s proud of you, that you’re doing great and he always knew you would. It feels nice.

It also feels bad.

You hate to admit it, so you wouldn’t even consider doing such — gun to your head and all — but it’s the man sitting on the other end of the lengthwise table that unfortunately catches your eye a bit more than you had liked. The truth was, that all of Jisung’s friends were good-looking men; in fact, you wondered how he managed to wrangle up so many to begin with, but the thought is fleeting and replaced by the attention served on Changbin. Black t-shirt and short, brown hair, nice lips and even nicer arms. Certainly a man that works out, cares about the way he looks, and wants everyone to notice it.

And you are, much to your guilt.

But you figure — nothing wrong with looking. Everyone looks. A common and damaging misconception within a relationship that ones libido simply dies for all others upon entering a monogamous partnership with another person — that both parties are to never see, experience, acknowledge the existence of another attractive human being ever again; and if you do, that you’re wrong, you’re broken, you’re a bad person. It’s bullshit.

However, suppose it does become a bit trickier when the object of your admiration is one of your partners best friends.

The part that you do allow yourself to experience guilt over, is the subtle wishing in the back of your mind — that maybe Jisung had looked like that. That yes, all things considered, Jisung was the perfect match — and yet, you can’t help but yearn for more.

A starkly human flaw, the innate pursuit of perfection. Of pleasure.

You’ve lost count by now, how many times Jisung has been unable to get you there, without battery powered assistance.

And you want nothing more than for this to be enough, so much so that you’re willing to lie, and pretend — to him, to yourself — that it is, that you’re happy with this, that you’re fulfilled.

When Jisung asks in one particularly low moment, unable to deny himself of the desire to seek the praise that he feels deep down he does not deserve, you cave and grant it to him.

‘Do you miss it?’

The feeling of coming around hands or mouths or other such appendages that were not your own, and in these moments of complete vulnerability, what is one to do but lie?

Are you strong enough to bear the burden of the truth? Be the deliverer of it?

And you believe in the moment, that the both of you are simply agreeing to exist in the fairy tale of satisfaction, because the alternative is far too great to take on.

But you do remember what it’s like — a memory brought closer and closer to the forefront of your mind each and every time that your loving, wonderful, boyfriend fails. Each and every time.

“Hey uhh—” you shout into the front door of the home, seemingly empty despite you having been invited to be there. “Is anyone…home?”

You hear vague sounds akin to a television in the living room and take it upon yourself to enter — you were invited, after all. Kicking your shoes off and dropping your bag, you carefully tiptoe through the hallway entrance towards the sounds of people talking through a speaker — and turning the corner, you’re delighted to find someone, after all.

Not who you’re looking for, however. far from it.

“Oh shit, sorry, I didn’t hear the door,” he says, sitting up from the couch and fumbling for the remote to turn the volume on the television down. “Our door bell is broken, so—”

“It’s fine, sorry for just walking in, Ji—”

“Nah, it’s cool,” he says, waving a hand without a care in the world about who walks into their home, seemingly. “It’s spring break, we figure people are just gonna be coming and going anyways.”

Seo Changbin. He apparently only owns black shirts that fit his figure exquisitely.

You wish that you could be a bit more vague about your carnal interest in the man, however, when he catches the way you watch him. The two of you make eye contact for a moment and you can feel your ears pick up heat. Changbin doesn’t break eye contact first — peculiar — a game to him, perhaps?

You’re not happy about the way this situation is already beginning to get out of hand, either.

“You want a drink?”

Words so sudden, you barely even hear them over the sound of your thoughts of Changbin bending you over the back of the couch he’s currently seated on and turning you out. Guilt. You shouldn’t. You can’t. Stop.

You stutter for a reply, “um, water is fine, yeah,” and watch as Changbin chuckles to himself as he stands — walking towards, and then right by you on his way to the kitchen.

But not before flashing you a knowing raise of his eyebrows as he passes.

“Do you know when Ji will be back?” you ask, tone far more wobbly than you had wanted it to be. Pathetic.

You watch Changbin move through the kitchen, opening numerous cabinets in an attempt to find a glass before eventually locating one and heading into the fridge thereafter. “Probably like, 10-15 minutes? He and Hyunjin ran to the store for alcohol and shit, shouldn’t be long it’s not far.”

Raising the glass as if to inform you of it’s ability to be retrieved, you head over to the kitchen island and take it from his hand, sipping gently from the rim, attempting to ignore the way the man is watching your every move as you do.

“Are you staying the night?”

It shouldn’t be that jarring of a question — in fact, it’s a pretty normal one for a housemate to ask, but your thoughts running rampant in all of the directions that they shouldn’t be has you far more susceptible to the horrors of, well, Changbin saying anything to you at all.

“Yeah, think so,” you reply, sheepishly. Since when are you sheepish, you wonder?

“Cool,” is all he says, grabbing a sweater off one of the swiveling chairs and heading towards the staircase — presumably up to his room. You think for a moment, that you made it out relatively unscathed from this interaction.

“Y'all keep it down then, alright? My room’s right across the hall”

And it’s cheeky, based on his tone. Likely not meaning anything by it, but the thought of Changbin being able to hear Jisung fuck you makes your skin run hot. Would he listen? Would he want to listen? Would he…jerk off to it? Then the thoughts of him touching himself, hand wrapped tightly around himself at the sounds of you…not coming.

A bit of a damper on the impromptu fantasy.

But it’s just in that moment that you hear Hyunjin and your man barreling through the front door, with what seems like twenty bags of assorted alcoholic beverages, bottles and mixers, with more still in the car, as Hyunjin happily informs.

There’s a certain moment that night, when Jisung is grinding into you — lips pressed against your neck and a hand wrapped in your hair — that his pelvis hits just right and you’re so close; so, so, close that you just about resort to begging for him not to stop, to please get you there, please topple this one issue that grows and grows but can’t be spoken about. You think again, about Changbin telling you to keep it down, and in a moment of weakness you cry out louder, and it truly does almost get you there.

Almost, which unfortunately only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades.

Music booming, red solo cups littering the lawn like flowers on a cool autumn day, the nine of you arrive to the home of the party — with no idea who anyone is, including the host. Typical for spring break — almost an alternate reality that plays by completely different rules.

Quickly, everyone ends up off in different directions, the majority off to talk to someone that strikes their fancy, leaving you and Jisung together as the only couple in the “house.”

“Guess it’s just you and me tonight, babe,” Jisung says with a smile, “let’s get drinks.”

Unfortunately, one of the positives of Jisung being such a social butterfly, also tended to ring negatively in scenarios such as this. The type of man to make friends with any and everyone in his immediate proximity, and with alcohol added to the mix, meant that you often found yourself on your own and making due with the time. This wasn’t necessarily a problem — as a woman being entirely capable of taking care of yourself — but it was a tad bit frustrating, heading out into the back yard through the sliding glass doors of the massive home to find a makeshift dance floor, and dozens of people sloppily dancing to house music on the destroyed lawn beneath their feet.

Having not yet had enough to drink, dancing would not be in the cards for you.

…Unless?

“Where’s Ji?”

A familiar voice, not always welcomed.

“Last I saw, he was upstairs with a group of people discussing whether or not the US government has been hiding the knowledge of having found intelligent life on other planets from it’s citizens.”

You watch Changbin pause before raising an eyebrow and giving a sort of assured nod, “yeah, that sounds right.”

“What’re ya drinkin’?” you ask, and you think it’s the alcohol that allows you to play it so cool. Maybe you weren’t even that hot for the man after all, finding yourself perfectly capable of being normal in his presence now.

“Gin, you?”

“Straight?” you ask, stricken with horror. Visibly taken aback.

“Yeah, I’m cultured.”

“You’re insane.”

“I can be both. Want to dance?”

The abruptness of the question takes you aback again, because the two of you were not talking about this so where did it come from? But Changbin just watches you — completely straight faced, waiting for a reply.

“Yeah, I guess.”

You realize shortly after agreeing to this — reaching the dance “floor” and feeling Changbin’s strong hands on your hips, that this was a mistake — and all of that stuff that you thought not all that long ago about being totally fine about this man, were in fact, alcohol-induced psychosis, because you were not fine, and not even a little bit.

Changbin turns you around to face away from him, ass pressed up against his groin, and you know that realistically you can’t feel his dick, but you can feel the natural hardness of the bulge from wearing tight jeans, and you swear it makes you dizzy. Fingers digging into the natural divots of where your hip bones are and strong, tight chest pressed up against your back, you can feel the heat of his breath against the back of your ear — your neck, and your skin burns from the contact — from the closeness.

From how much you shouldn’t be indulging in this right now, because your wonderful, loving boyfriend is just inside.

And he feels you tense beneath his grip, leaning down closer to your ear, “are you alright?”

You consider it confirmation that you should pull away from the man, so you do. You apologize, citing how he did nothing wrong and you just need some fresh air from the crowd and quickly make way from it, nearly running off and to the side of the house — dark, much fewer people — only a handful there to partake in other such party substances not allowed inside of the home: hosts request.

Back up against the wall, and finally a moment to breathe, you gasp for the air that you feel you had been starving yourself of the entire time you were in Changbin’s grip, but it’s only moments later that you find the same familiar visage having followed you, slowly popping from around the corner to find you, but stopping quite distant from your own stature.

“Look,” he says, hands in the air as if surrendering to whatever fate you have in store for him and his misdeeds, “did I do something wrong? I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable—”

“No,” you cut him off, swallowing hard, “but we…we shouldn’t do that.”

“What? Dance?” he asks, surprise lacing his tone as he slowly steps closer to you again. “Is Ji that jealous?”

You don’t know the answer to that question, you don’t really want to have to find out.

“No, that’s not it,” and you pause, because you hadn’t thought the answer to this question through beyond this point, and are now left searching for it in the moment. Not ideal.

“We just shouldn’t.”

Watching Changbin watch you in silent response, you think that you can literally see him come to the obvious conclusion. Finally. Much to your disappointment. You had wanted to get away with this for a little bit longer; only exchanging hurried glances towards the man, his body, his build. Wasn’t thinking about him during sex with your boyfriend punishment enough, and for everyone involved?

And yet, he chooses not to say anything. Breathing heavily through his nose and dropping his head down with a smirk before raising it again only slightly to look up at you in the dark through his eyelashes — you can’t help but think of how unbelievably sexy he looks right now, in this moment. About how none of the other people here know who either of you are — or Jisung — how easy it would be to get away with something, anything. Just to scratch the itch. Just to get it over with. It could be enough, maybe, to never have to deal with this ever again. Would that be so bad? So wrong? To put this to bed…and not even literally.

You hate the way that you want it so badly — him to come to you, press you into the wall and lips into yours. To feel his strong hands on your body again, maybe even a little more. You know, just to get it out of your system, of course.

But Changbin remains firm in his stance, playfully pointing at you and grinning.

“Be good,” he tells you, before turning back from where he came, and leaving you in the darkened shroud of the side of the house, breathless and embarrassingly wet.

A couple of nights later, when the nine of you go to dinner again, it’s not intentional — you ending up sitting across from him, with Jisung to your right, but here you are, regardless.

It’s evident from a lack of change in the overall atmosphere, that Changbin had mentioned nothing to your boyfriend about that night at the party — of which you are thankful, not quite sure how to explain that one away, but your personal, and quite specific atmosphere with him, seems irrevocably different. Slouched in his chair carelessly with arms crossed, it makes him look massive for a man that all-in-all, is not that large in stature — but still, the positioning of his arms over his chest certainly makes aware all of the muscle and veins in his forearms. For your viewing pleasure, but likely not purposefully. 'Be good,' you remember. It echoes in your mind ever since that night. Be good. Be good. Behave.

But it’s the knowing glances that the two of you share over the table, eye contact that lingers a bit longer than it should — than it does with any of Jisung’s other friends — something shared only between the two of you. A secret. A longing, albeit, maybe only one-sided. Changbin knows that you want him, that you desire him. The word “crave” comes to mind, and you’re guilty just at that, with your boyfriend sitting just beside you, a loving hand on your leg — completely unaware of all of the ways that you wish it were Changbin’s hand — splicing together memories from the other night in your thoughts in an attempt to experience what it would feel like if it were him instead.

You tell yourself it’s normal, to desire others. It is. But you worry that everyone has a breaking point, eventually.

“Since you’re part of the group now—”

The words shake you from your fantasies, realizing that you’re being addressed, and your attention turns to the man speaking — Chan — reaching towards you in an effort to get your phone from you, and you recognize the gesture immediately despite having only just been lost in your own mind.

“Might as well add you to the group chat, so you know what’s going on at any given time, yeah?” he finishes, typing into the front of your phone as you watch him. You don’t respond, not much time to before he’s already handing your device back to you and you look at it; indeed, it’s a group chat, and everyone is there.

By phone number.

You want to be better, stronger than this, you think to yourself as you leave the restaurant, heading to your own home this evening with work in the morning. Jisung kisses you goodnight and thanks you for coming out and tells you how happy he is that you get on so well with his friends. How it means so much to him that all of the most important people in his life are good together.

You feel bad, but not bad enough.

Sitting in the drivers seat of your car and watching Jisung head back inside, you pull your phone out and go through the contacts of the group chat, locating Changbin’s number right away. It feels bad, it truly does. You keep reiterating this in your mind — and begin to wonder if you’re trying to convince yourself of the fact, rather than truly experiencing the guilt you once did.

Taking a breath, you open an empty message box with Changbin’s number — it only takes you a moment to think of something to say. Something to lie. It’s pathetic how desperate you are for interaction, for attention from this man, this man who is not your partner.

>hey, I think I left my bag in the restaurant, can you check for me?

Only a few short moments pass before the screen illuminates with the speech bubble to indicate one typing up a reply. Your heart leaps into your throat, and you take the time to contemplate the blurred lines of what constitutes an affair, and how surely they were blurred.

>you didn’t, and you know that, didn’t I tell you to behave?

Humiliating is the only word that comes to mind upon being so easily seen through by this man, this man that you barely know, have barely interacted with.

You find it intriguing, however, that not once has he threatened to tell Jisung. Perhaps there’s nothing to tell, after all. It’s always so easy to convince oneself that there is a perfectly reasonable explanation behind every sinful, wrongdoing.

You don’t respond. figure, that’s enough disgrace for one evening.

Coming down from your own, self-induced orgasmic high, Jisung rolls off of you and to the side, chest heaving and grinning as he looks over at you. You pretend to be as worn out as he seemingly is. You wish you were. He kisses you, lovingly, able to taste all of the adoration he has for you on his tongue and you know it’s times like that and in spite of everything else, this is the man that you love. This is the man that you admire.

But you do not desire him. Is everything else enough? Is lust that heavy and all-consuming?

"I’m gonna run for a drink, do you want anything, babe?” you say, rolling off of the bed and pulling your socks back on. You watch Jisung shake his head slowly, post-orgasmic smile still gracing his features. You loved the way he was so absolutely enthralled by you. You wished you felt the same, but maybe this is enough.

2:37am reading on the clock in the hallway, you tiptoe out of the room and down the stairs towards the kitchen with the only lights on being from the stove top, as to not leave the unfamiliar home completely pitch black in the depths of night. Pulling your over sized hoodie down and a bit over your panty-clad behind despite being in the company of no one and look around for a clean glass among the numerous filthy ones strewn about the counter tops.

"Looking for this?”

the words startle you so much you just about scream, heart dropping into your stomach at the sound of another human being accompanying you, even worse, when you recognize them better than you had hoped.

Changbin stands up from his previous squatting position, handing you an empty cup that he had found rifling through the cupboards where the pots and pans were typically held, another in his other hand.

“No one does dishes,” he laughs, “you might wanna wash that before you use it, though, it was pretty far back there.’

"So it seems,” you respond, normally, turning towards the sink and running water through the item in your hand.

“There’s cold water in the fridge.”

“Tap is fine,” you answer, finally filling it and turning back towards the man, pressing the rim to your lips and taking a sip. You laughed to yourself in silence — about how much the current scene reminded you of the first in this house. The atmosphere, however, had certainly shifted since then.

You allow yourself a moment to gaze upon him during a few of the minutes he spends looking down and at his phone. White tank top hugging his torso paired with gray sweatpants that you found yourself eyeing a little bit too much, you’d have been lying if you said you weren’t curious. Obviously.

He looked unbelievable. Broad, strong, masculine.

“Have fun?”

It takes you a moment to follow the question — what he was inferring, and once you do, absolute horror takes you — visually, physically, mentally. Oh God, he heard? you think to yourself.

You wonder if that’s why he’s awake right now, but it’s the least pressing matter on your mind, surprisingly.

“Oh my God, you heard us?” you gasp into the plastic cup, it echoing your sounds in a somewhat humorous way, and Changbin chuckles under his breath.

He doesn’t answer for a few seconds, finishing up with his phone before dimming it and slipping it back into his pocket. Chewing on his bottom lip, he finally graces you with a response.

You sort of wish he hadn’t, though.

“I heard him, not you.”

It’s a somewhat innocuous statement on the surface level. Jisung isn’t a quiet lover by any means, that much is true, but it’s the implications beyond that, that really pain you — and also ring painfully true. Does he…know?

You swallow hard, the sexual tension building once again, and with how little clothing the both of you are currently wearing, now certainly needs not be the time for these kinds of games. You apologize to him hurriedly, insisting that you’ll be more mindful next time and keep it down and in rush turn towards the refrigerator next to you — half in an attempt to release the strain on the situation, and half because you really fucking need that cold water now. Bending over and reaching in, you seek peace inside the iciness of the container — taking a deep breath of relief inside of it before reaching for what you had intended to retrieve.

But the devil waste no time in doing evil deeds.

Pressing up against you from behind, Changbin reaches into the icy box as well — your entire body stiffening beneath him at the contact, and any relief that the cool air had granted you — be it long gone, now, replaced with fiery hot contact of very few layers of clothing between two people.

You had almost forgot what desire felt like, and it was engrossing.

Changbin feels heavy and hard against you, his body heat immediately engulfing you and setting fire to your skin — the feeling of him on top of you like this, his pelvis pressed firmly into your back side — you think for a moment that you’re absolutely not strong enough for this, that you cannot handle this torture. Your mind races at all of the ways that Changbin could have you right then and there, and you wish that he would. Imagery of being bent over the counter top with panties around your thighs; held down, in place, unable to move or escape or do anything except take him — the thoughts presenting a dull throb between your legs when surely — it’s only been seconds before Changbin is pulling back and away from you with the container of butter in his hand.

“Sorry, needed to grab this.”

The thing about guilt, is that it becomes easier and easier to manage the longer that one is forced to do so. You realize that this rings true as you tell your boyfriend that you don’t feel well, and that you’ll be in the bathroom — you’re hopeful that your completely adoring, attentive boyfriend let’s you be without checking up on you just this one time — as you quickly rub your fingertips into your panties, chasing a high that comes all too quickly for your liking, and given the circumstances. Biting back your moans as to not allow them space to echo while you come, you realize that the only person you hope to hear you, is Seo Changbin.

A pool party, how incredibly frat of them, you think.

But it’s charming, and all in good fun. People from all around the neighborhood come over bringing food and drinks and all sorts of different things for fun — some bring party hats — who knows why, others bring floaty pool toys as if they’re children, and one couple even bring a llama, no one entirely sure what for, but not willing to ask any questions about it, either.

Holding Jisung’s hand as he attempts to light one of the barbecues, you sort of chuckle at his inability to manage such a menial task — watching him huff and puff in discontent at all of the ways the charcoal won’t catch flame for him, he finally pulls his hand from yours to look around the vicinity for something in particular.

“Have you seen the thing for the lighter fluid?” he asks, already flustered and whipping his head about in an attempt to locate it. “It’s like a…uhhh…like a red canister…”

“It should be in the side house,” Minho pipes up from the pool, “that’s where all that shit is kept.”

“I’ll get it, babe,” you assure, kissing him on the mouth before running off towards the direction dictated to you.

Reaching the old, worn down shack, the door inside rests ajar, but you scurry inside all the same.

And it’s becoming comical all of the ways in which you find yourself in this situation.

Changbin looks up and behind him from his squatting position, emptying ice into coolers and placing beer bottles inside of them.

“What’s up?” he asks, and you explain the charcoal debacle.

You’re reminded of his body pressed up against your own again. You think of what the two of you could get away with right here, right now, party guests being none the wiser.

And it must have been obvious, when he stands up, wiping his hands on a nearby towel before turning towards you.

“What’s going on with you and Ji?”

The question just about knocks you on your ass.

“Wh-what—”

“Come on, this isn’t…” and he pauses, thinking through his words perhaps a bit more delicately. “This isn’t…right, so what’s…”

It feels bizarre, the sudden coming to head of the situation at hand. Changbin acknowledging in words that there is, in fact, a this, and that whatever this was, was wrong. Not okay. Well upon it’s way to being extremely fucked up and morally reprehensible — on both of your parts. You’re Jisung’s girlfriend, but Changbin is his friend. There’s no innocent party, there.

Suppose, for the first time in a long time, honesty may be the best policy.

“I love Jiji, I really do—”

“But…”

“But…he doesn’t—” and now you pause, also thinking of how to delicately word this. You don’t want to humiliate your boyfriend, it sounds so pathetic when you try to say the words to someone else. To someone else you want to do all of the things for you that your own man can’t, at that. More salt in the wound.

“He doesn’t get you off?”

You don’t say anything, just a disheartened shrug of the shoulders, and Changbin’s expression Changes from concern to confusion. “He’s selfish? I never would have expected—”

But you cut him off, “No, no! He’s not, it’s not that, it’s just—”

And then his face switches back. Back to concern. “Oh — oh, he can’t.”

“Yeah.”

The two of you stand in silence for what feels like forever, and you laugh internally, thinking about how it’s the first time you’ve been in the presence of this man and not been thinking about all of the ways you want him to fuck you. The irony being, of course, that the conversation topic be about sex.

“I mean, that’s tough,” he starts again, visibly uncomfortable and likely unsure how to help. You think that Changbin might have realized just a bit too late that he was out of his depth with this one. “Sexual compatibility is a big deal in a relationship, y'know?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t think I should tell you to break up with my best friend,” he says, trying to lighten the mood, “but I don’t know…has it gotten better at least? Over time?”

And you’re reminded of that time that Jisung almost made you come — the time you were thinking about Changbin, instead.

“A bit.”

Upon an awkward lull in the conversation, the two of you exit the side house with the items that you had both entered for. Hyunjin walks by at just the same time and makes a passing comment about what were you two doing in there in a joking manner, to which you playfully slap his arm and tell him to shut up. Changbin acknowledges it little, only looking down to you with what you can only deem as sympathy.

But you don’t want to be pitied, you want to be fucked.

After the party and upon returning home, you dig your phone out from your bag to find a notification — a text from Changbin, much to your surprise.

>I won’t rescue you

You know what that means. You also know that dick can’t save you. It doesn’t stop you from wanting it, anyways.

Two hours into your attempted home improvement escapades, with a puddle on the ground in your bathroom and what you can only suspect is something or another missing from this tubing, you decide to call it quits and ask The Men if they can make themselves useful to you.

>do any of you know anything about plumbing or can you only do beer bongs?

Hyunjin: come on that shit was cool

Jeongin: idk if we told you but he puked for like two hours after that btw, it ruled so hard

Hyunjin: dude shut up

Chan: @Changbin knows some shit about plumbing, he’s fixed some stuff for me before

Changbin: yeah whats up, gimmie your address i’ll take a look at it in like, an hour

You send your address and dim your phone, only to receive another notification immediately after, but it’s another text from Changbin — this time, privately.

>this better not be a ploy to get me alone in your apartment, I told you to behave.

And it wasn’t, but now you can’t help but acknowledge the fact.

When Changbin inspects the scene, he apologizes for assuming the worst of you, making a joke that he actually wishes you were just trying to fuck him, because the drainage situation is a disaster. The two of you laugh, but in only about twenty minutes of work, the man has everything under control, your drainage fixed, and even wiped up the floor for you. A true gentleman.

The problem lie in all of the very specific ways that Changbin’s muscles flex beneath his shirt as he work — turning nobs and forcing things back into place — undoing all of the nonsense you had inflicted, you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t sexy. It was incredibly sexy, almost painfully sexy watching him work. You try to ignore it. You have to ignore it.

Changbin stands, behind against the counter and arms crossed as he looks at you, just having finished his handyman work. You think of all of the ways that you could be better, should be better.

All of the ways that you’re not.

It’s accidentally forceful, the way you slam yourself into him and press your mouth against his own — months of pent up, sexual frustration finally snapping and it’s all that you can manage to not immediately reach for his belt and start unbuckling it. You settle for hands against his chest to feel the muscle beneath, the muscle you have been dying to feel this entire time, and it’s every bit enthralling as you knew it would be. Part of you wishes that Changbin had been stronger, strong enough to pull you off of him, to stop you, to not kiss back.

But he’s not.

There’s reluctance at first, you can feel it in the tenseness of his mouth as you kiss at him, before you melt it away and he begins meeting you halfway with equally sloppy, needy presses of his mouth into your own, and you’re surprised that he’s the one that quickly reaches for your pants — unbuttoning, zipping, and roughly pulling them down mid thigh — not even bothering to take your panties with them. Taking you by the arms, Changbin spins you so that the two of you switch places, just as hastily dipping his hand into the already wet fabric and finally getting to feel the effect he’s had on you in such a short amount of time.

It’s embarrassing how wrecked for him you already look, with him only now pressing two fingers inside of you, and you think that nothing has ever felt more heavenly.

Reaching his free hand up and around the back of your neck, he pulls the two of you closer as he settles into a fast pace with his fingers; the drag against your walls already allowing you to build a familiar burning in your abdomen, the muscles of your thighs tightening with the promise of finally getting what you’ve been wanting. He continues kissing you, hard, before dipping down and pressing lips against your neck — slowly dragging up against your ear, the hot breath of his arousal echoing into you. You know he wants it bad, you wonder if it’s just as bad as you do.

There’s something about telling a man that another man can’t make you come. Something primal. Ego.

"I wanna hear you so bad,” he finally groans, the first words spoken since the encounter started despite it only being less than a minute in. You cry out in response, it’s the promise of release that he’s bestowing on you, and that in and of itself is almost enough to tip you over the edge.

“But we can’t do this.”

The words take longer to register than the immediate feeling of emptiness in your core does. Changbin stops, pulling his hand from you and takes a number of steps back from you altogether, leaving you reeling, fucked out, and with a ruined orgasm on top of it all. Figure, you didn’t need to step out of your relationship for this.

That thought makes you feel bad.

Through messy hair you watch the man before you. The way his chest heaves, the way he closes his eyes in an attempt to gather himself. Gather his sanity. Gather his ability to make good choices.

You look down at the tenting in his pants, and you’re so sure you’ve never wanted dick this badly in your life.

If the topic before, prior to now, was ‘what constitutes the blurry lines of an affair?’ you were sure it was crossed now. It doesn't feel as good as you thought it would, but that might be because you didn’t finish.

“I’m gonna wash my hands, and then I’m gonna go,” he says, and it’s non-accusatory, with no particular tone to it at all. As if he is genuinely just informing one of his plans.

Once Changbin leaves, sitting on your couch and scrolling on your phone, you contemplate all of the ways in which you’re terrible, and once you stop scrolling long enough to make a decision, you realize there’s comfort in simply knowing, accepting.

Turning speaker phone on, the line rings a couple of times before there’s a sing-song answer on the other end. He’s always so happy, he really thinks he’s the luckiest guy in the world.

“Hey babe, can you come over?”

You’re a little bit thankful that the next few days are just working and being home, granting you much needed time to recuperate, but with the end of spring break now right around the corner, you knew you had one more house party to attend — held by your very own boys, naturally, it would be necessary that you attend.

And you haven’t seen Changbin since he was at your apartment, but with Jisung not mentioning a single awkward word about it, you can only assume that not a word was spoken in any direction on the matter.

Not one for dressing up, jeans and a t-shirt suit you just fine for this gathering, and it’s only natural that Hyunjin make some snide comment about it upon your entering — playfully, of course, the two of you had become much closer over the two weeks time, but he certainly always had something to say…a blessing and a curse, but mostly a curse.

When 3am rolls around and dozens of party attendees find themselves littered across the living room, dining room, and even kitchen floors — much to your disdain, as someone having planned to stay the night at that home.

Even Jisung — party extraordinaire, passed out early — in his own bed, of course, because he falls asleep to watching Parks & Recreation after three beers.

Slipping down the stairs and finding the scene before you, attempting to reach the kitchen for food or a drink is akin to braving a minefield; bodies thrown about every which way, and it’s only catching movement out of the corner of your eye that pulls your attention away and to the man you had hoped to get through this evening not seeing. You watch as he quietly dips down into a hallway that you’re unfamiliar with, and you question what he’s got hiding down there.

You know it’s a bad idea, maybe he’ll just tell you to fuck off, that would be the best outcome.

“Hey!” you whisper-yell down the hall towards him as he disappears into the doorway, but he hears you, popping his head back out to find out where the sound had come from, and immediately catching eyes with you. You motion a sort of “what are you doing” in sign language that doesn’t exist, and he motions for you to come with him.

So many mistakes begin with good intentions. It’s not about being stronger than your desires, it’s about never being in a position in which you have to be.

Hopping among strung out bodies, you finally make your way to the door that leads to what you now understand to be the basement. Changbin heads down first, turning an old lightbulb hanging from the ceiling along the way to illuminate the path, and the wooden stairs creak with every step taken on them.

“I had no idea this was even down here,” you say in amazement, finally able to gaze around the space once you reach approximately the third to bottom step.

“Yeah, it’s basically a whole other home down here,” he explains, pointing in directions as he does. “Kitchen there, bedroom over there, and a bathroom to your left.”

Changbin pulls ahead as you stop to take the sights in. Despite the stairs showing their age, the rest of the interior appears well taken care of — glossed and polished wood adoring the kitchenette, bar, and majority of the tables in the living space — along with comfortable looking plush couches and an enormous flat screen television on the other end of the room.

“Drink?”

You think it’s amusing the way Changbin likes to pretend nothing has ever happened, no matter the circumstances.

“Sure.”

Standing next to the man, you watch the way his hands work in twisting and shaking items to makeshift bar tend in the moment; how his forearms flex, veins protruding, and you feel bad at the way that you still want him so bad, even after everything. Even after last time. After him walking out on you due to guilt, shame. You still wanted it.

He slows in his movements, looking at you as you watch him, and when you raise your gaze up to meet his eyes — you find something different within them.

Suppose, that’s what broken resolve looks like.

In a flash, Changbin slams everything in his hands down, taking you by the arms again just like he had before, only turning you this time, and pushing you towards the other side of the kitchenette — shorter counter, shorter sink — but he bends you over it all the same.

It happens so fast that your head spins, him having you at his mercy like this — that you barely even have a moment to register his hands on your pants again, ripping your jeans down your legs again, and shoving his hand inside your panties — all just as he had the time previous. Pressing his middle finger flat between your folds but with no intent to penetrate you, he growls at the overwhelming wetness you’ve been harboring for him this whole time, though not much time at all, maybe ten or fifteen minutes between meeting on the staircase and now, and still…soaking for him. Maybe a better man could resist the temptation, but it’s not him.

"God,” he groans into your shoulder, using his body weight to hold you down and in place. “You want it that bad, huh? I get you this wet?”

You don’t answer, still reeling from the motions, feeling his finger against you, and now weak at the way that he’s talking to you — it’s devastating when you feel the loss of his hand from you again, and you think, “not a second time,” unsure if you can even survive being left in such a state again.

But your mind is put to ease, at the sound of his belt buckle clattering throughout the basement, alongside the gentle swoop of the fabric of your undergarment being pulled down your legs.

You feel him adjusting from behind you, going through all of the motions necessary to eventually fuck you, and you’re absolutely beside yourself at the thought of finally having it. Excitement, anticipation, all bubbling in your abdomen — alongside the pulsing ache between your legs of wanting him, you can hear him tear open the package of a condom, and it’s jarring in a particular sense. Not the existence of it, but what the condom entails.

“Did you bring that…for this?” you ask, shaky in voice from desire and also uncertainty of the reply following.

Changbin forgoes answering right away to instead focus on rolling the rubber along himself, carefully beginning to line himself up with you from behind with the tip of his cock gently prodding at your entrance before speaking. “Unfortunately.”

A man worn down. Disappointed, but a slave to desire all the same.

With the answer, his initial push begins. Slow, gentle — you realize in the moment that you’ve never seen his cock, and thus have no idea what you’re “working with” so to speak, but as he pushes deeper, with more force, the stretch of his girth becomes so quickly overwhelming, tears threatening the corners of your eyes, your fingers desperately dig into the metal of the sink in front of you — begging for any kind of purchase at all, before Changbin stills inside of you, buried completely, and presses his mouth against your shoulder. “God you’re—” he begins, needing a moment to collect himself a bit more before finishing his sentence. “Small.”

You don’t know if that’s the case, or the inverse, but either way, you’re sure you’ve never been this full — the way you can feel every pulse and throb of his cock against your walls, you relish in the thought of what it’ll feel like when he comes — you almost wish he hadn’t brought a condom. A heinous thought born of desire, the most wicked trait.

“Are you sure?” he asks, and it’s a little late by now you think, but you nod all the same; desperate, whiny requests for him to move following immediately after, and he’s more than happy to oblige.

Withdrawing almost fully, Changbin pushes back in again, slowly, feeling the drag of his cock against your insides and reveling in the warm wetness. Taking into account how easy the glide is before gaining speed, or force — but it’s easy, the way you’re soaking for him and have been for weeks — almost humiliatingly so, that it’s so easy to take him with how big he is and how there was no foreplay. Your body telling on you with how happy your cunt was to accommodate him, you wish in the moment that you could have feigned at least a tiny bit of disinterest.

Pulling his body off of yours, Changbin settles one hand down onto your waist, the other pressing upward and taking purchase into your shoulder for more leverage to pull you down, on, and against him — it’s then that you finally feel the full force of his drive into you, the first sound of skin against skin that you had been craving for so long, and already — between the painful crave of him leading up to now, the thick drag of his cock, how he pulls at all of your walls and nerves with every drive and withdraw. It’s so fast that you can feel the promise of orgasm bubble up within you, something the man had yet to grant you, and you could only pray that he would be so generous tonight.

“Can I fuck you harder?”

The question sounds stupid to you, but you don’t have it in you to discuss it, only answering in babbling “please's” that sound on the brink of tears and just the sound of it is enough to make his length throb inside of you with want — the scene of a woman so fucked out for his cock that she can barely even speak anymore.

So, Changbin makes the executive decision to stop asking you to. “Jesus, okay,” is all he answers at the sights and sounds before him, driving into you once hard and fast and eliciting the most obscene cry out from you.

Settling into a brutal pace, it’s not long before you feel the promising loom of orgasm approaching — your knees threatening to buckle beneath you — you reach one hand forward in an attempt to hold onto something proper, but Changbin only digs his hands into you harder. “I’ve got you,” he grunts, following with a “fuck,” as he feels the walls of your pussy clamp down around him. Your whimpers get shorter, louder, in almost an instant, and he has no choice but to fuck you through it without so much as a plan of how to help you get there — frankly, because he didn’t think it would be this fast, this easy.

“Already? Fuck, so tight,” he groans, still maintaining his drive against you, and it’s then that he says the words that you’re not sure would ever be spoken of ever again. Words so obscene, so reprehensible, that you didn’t even know Changbin had it in him. The man of relatively good, upstanding, morality. Better than you. Better than this.

“Can’t even tell Jisung’s ever touched you, fuck.”

You wish it weren’t the thing that sends you barreling over the edge, too. The absolute repulsion of it. So incredibly fucked up and unkind to a man that has done nothing deserving of it. Of this.

But nonetheless, you come, and painfully hard, at that. Muscles tightening against one another with such force that it feels stifling, like you can’t breathe. A breathless, almost silent orgasm ripping through your body as the object of your desire fucks you through it, hard and fast — little effort on his part, really.

“Miss it, baby?” Changbin whispers towards you, and you wonder what’s gotten into him now, not that you’re complaining, but the once docile, reluctant man has slowly fallen away for this aggressive, dominant man — a man taking great pleasure in claiming your body for his own cock, instead of your boyfriends. His friends. “Miss coming around a fat cock?”

You whimper out in affirmation, largely due to the fact that the way he’s talking and the relentless stretch of him is getting you close all over again, and at record speed.

Hearing the way your voice breaks, you hear him chuckle from behind you between hard thrusts, “close again?” and you nod. “How can I get you there?”

But you can barely speak, only the sound of ��r-rub-” managing through your lips but thankfully it’s enough to get the message across — pulling his hand down from your waist and snaking it down your front and between your thighs — rubbing sloppy circles in the vague area in which your clit should be; not being familiar enough with your anatomy yet to be able to hone in on right where he need to press, but the effort is enough that your second is quickly approaching, and threatening to tear his first from him as well, his panting and groaning weighing heavier and heavier on your ears with each passing second.

“Close?” and you know he’s asking you because he is, but he wants to get you there first. You nod quickly, biting into your lip, begging for a second release to take you and that he can pull it from you.

And oh, can he.

“God, I want to come into this little cunt,” he growls, still fucking into you hard and fast, the sounds of impact radiating through the basement without a care in the world who could possibly here them. “It’s mine now, anyways, isn’t it?”

The question makes your head spin. Genuinely light-headed at the implications.

“Isn’t it mine? Shouldn’t I be able to come in what’s mine? Whose is it?”

Only a loud whimper escapes you, your orgasm now quickly threatening to rip through you, and you don’t want to say it. You don’t want to answer the question. You don’t want to…

State the obvious.

Changbin repeats the last question again, and with you teetering on the edge of orgasm, your resolve comes crumbling down.

“It’s yours, it’s yours, it’s yours!”

You repeat the chant a handful of more times as you come undone around his dick all over again, and it’s all that he needs to pull the same from him — walls clenching hard around him and stripping him of his release in a loud, throaty, groan. Changbin fucks you through the both of your highs, slowing with each thrust and pulling from you before he gets too soft — tying off and disposing of the condom in quick, record time.

You wonder if it’s because it signals all of his worst choices, in succession.

With so many packed suitcases and other such bags near the door, you find it nearly impossible to locate your shoes, but you’re happy about one thing, and that is the fact that you simply just get to slip your shoes on, and drive home to your comfortable apartment, without having to worry about doing any packing or unpacking.

The guys all crowd around the door to say goodbye, thank you for coming last night and spending so much time around — how much of an absolute pleasure it was to have you around so often. How much they love you.

How much Jisung loves you.

It causes a twinge in your stomach, hearing the words. Jisung pops up from the left side of you and curls his fingers in between your own just before kissing you on the side of your head and thanking you for spending so much time around these “losers” as well.

You can’t help but lay eyes on Changbin; leaned up against the wall, arms crossed, with the rest of the guys — quiet, but not any different than that of typical Seo Changbin. So cool, calm, collected — like nothing ever happened.

Like nothing was ever said.

Pulling you from your thoughts, you hear Chan make some off-hand comment about a girl that Minho had allegedly slept with during the week, and although denying it, Chan simply won’t hear it.

“Dude whatever, I know what I saw,” Chan says, stuffing a pair of basketball shorts in a bag of his, “Changbin was there, he saw it too.”

And Hyunjin laughs from the kitchen, still attempting to pack up left over drinks from the weekend. “Changbin won’t say shit though, that man is like a vault,” he starts, pausing only due to the fact that he just about drops a half full bottle of tequila on the tile floor. “That man is where secrets go to die, never to be heard from again.”

Your eyes pull towards the person in question again, slowly turning back towards you from his gaze at Hyunjin behind him — a smirk on his face, and just the ever so delicate presence of him chewing at the bottom of his lip to make eye contact with you before speaking.

“You have no idea.”

♡ send me your thoughts and feelings in my ask.

—this is a oneshot, there will be no part 2.

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missmarveledsblog · 4 months ago

Text

IF SHE WERE MINE ( BRADLEY BRADSHAW X READER )

summary : when rooster finds reader stupid boyfriend cheating he doesn't mind telling him exactly how stupid he is for hurting a woman like that , a woman he dreams of

warnings: slight angst , fluffy i guess , there will be a smutty part two 😉

Every week , every day and every second Bradley " rooster" Bradshaw was convinced the universe was against him knowing the one woman he truly was in love with was in the arms of another because he was afraid to do anything so he ended up watching her kisses on someone else's lip , her doe love filled glances for him to another . He wanted his happy ending , the one where he got the girl . so now here he was stuck in another bar or club in town jake insisted on bringing him but never said why just he needed to be there , that it was going to be important . just as he was about to leave he watch as the asshole walked in with another girl on arm . Anger wasn't the emotion he could describe what he felt watching the man , the girl he loved so much and this prick was wrapped around another. No bradley was beyond the point of anger , maybe even homicidal . how could this prick take what he already have for granted.

" hey asshole what the fuck " he growled storming across the bar ignoring jakes calls.

" who's this baby" the woman had the nerve asked.

" the best friend of his girlfriend " he snapped not caring the woman flinched at the words.

" hey come on man be cool " .

" be cool , she's at home probably believing whatever lame excuse you gave to be with this trash , how could you pick anyone above Y/N i mean if i was with a girl like that hell all other women would be faceless because a face like hers would drowned out the world . she does so much for you and yet this is how you repay her cheap hook ups with other women in bars not even hangmans that bad" he snapped .

" hey " jake yelled offended.

" you've got the most beautiful version of sunshine back home waiting on you and yet this is what your doing , your lucky she even picked your sorry ass spend time with , a girl like that is one in a million , you don't do anything to fucking mess that up or even risk losing " he ranted and raved .

" sounds like your more in love with her " the woman said softly not taking offence to his words towards her and moving far from the man she came in with .

" i do and i let a low life bastard take her before i couldnt even tell her how i felt " he sighed .

what bradley didn't notice in his verbal crusade was phoenix leading Y/N into the bar to catch the bastard red handed . nat, jake and bob caught him the night before and decided she would need to see it first hand , rooster was suppose to be there for her help pick up the pieces but she should know that jake didn't fill him in on the plans by looks of it . yet Y/N stood listening to her best friend telling her definitely now ex her loved her.

"Y/N shit hey baby " .

" Don't heybaby me what the fuck " she huffed.

" it's not what looks like promise " he scampered towards her .

" really man " the three dagger squad members and the woman he was there with all deadpanned.

" and you did you know he was seeing someone " she turned to the woman .

" no i didn't if i did i would not be here " she glared at the man .

" roo apologise from being mean to this woman " she turned to bradley .

" yeah sorry i didn't actually mean to call you trash " he scratched the back of his neck .

" no it's fine heat of the moment but i can see why you love her " she smiled .

" and you cheating shrimp dick of a man , you can't go around sleeping with multiple women with that thing no wonder the ladies of san diego are depressed , get your shit out of my place or i will throw it on the street as for the spare key leave it or my very big friends here will get it off you " she crossed her arms standing in front of the man .

" i'd go now and lady if you want good time blondey over there isnot too bad " she turned and walked off straight out of the door .

" follow her " nat ,jake and the woman yelled at rooster.

" oh shit yeah " he ran out the door. once he got out he could see her heading for the car park her head still high when she got to the car but the second he could see as her hand touch the door when the emotion of it all hit her .

not a second did he wait running towards her grabbing her into his arms as the sobs wrack through her body .

"i got you darling , i alway got you " he kissed top of her head just letting her get it out of her system .

" can you take me home roo , your home i don't want to be in mine " she sniffled wiping her eyes . god it broke his heart seeing her so broken and hurt but hell he wasn't going to lie he was so proud of how she handled it in the bar .

" course come on we can get your car later " he smiled softly leading her to the bronco .

" it's actually phoenix car i don't know how i was going to get into it " she wiped her eyes . he opened the door for he letting her in before he went to his own side her ex eyes locked on her , like he wanted to say something but when he seen the pissed glare from rooster he quickly changed his mind . while she sat there , her head a jumble mess of emotions from the hurt and heartbroken , down right stupidity of being with a man like her now ex, then the feelings of every word rooster said. a man she had known since she was a little girl , her best friend , the man she truly loved . the irony of it all was just exactly something life would throw at her she couldn't help but laugh.

" hey what's so funny" he smiled .

" i get cheated on by a guy i only gave a chance to because i never thought you'd love me back like more than a bestfriend and it took him to cheat for you to say you love me " she turned to the man her laughs turning to a another wave of sobs .

" oh shit i'm sorry really i wanted to tell you but come on your you , i don't deserve you OWW " He yelped feeling her pinching him .

" hey i will not sit here and listen to you put yourself down ok , your most amazing stupid man i know " she looked up at him , he was smiling brightly down at her . he'd always looked at her like this but this time it finally made sense , how he always looked at her like she hung the moon and star, the pure love she felt for him was reflected back and yet only now she saw it .

" i'm an idiot , i mean i should of known he was cheating and i was oblivious to how you felt even though it been staring at me all this time " she shook her head.

" come on just give your brain a rest tonight we can talk about all this another time " he squeezed her hand before driving off .

"I don't wanna talk roo , I want you and roo "

" thats me " he winked

" take me home or lose me forever " she chuckled.

" show me the way home honey " he kissed her hand .

Part two *

#top gun maverick #top gun fanfiction #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw x female reader #bradley bradshaw x you #top gun fandom #rooster x reader #rooster top gun

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sailorholly · 1 year ago

Text

Strictly Business Pt. 7

Summary: Spencer wants to gain sexual experience before asking out his dream date. You just want a way to release stress. What could go wrong?

Pairing: Spencer Reid × F. BAU Reader

Warnings: Friends with benefits. Smuttish.

W/C: 902

Strictly Business Masterlist

You look around the hotel bathroom as your face is pressed against the glass of the shower door. Spencer has you pinned to it as he thrusts into you from behind. This was your last day helping him practice.

His date with Chloe was in two days, and you would be spending most of tomorrow traveling back home. You collectively decided after Rossi caught you on the jet that you wouldn’t risk doing anything there anymore.

Your most recent case was solved earlier this morning, but it was storming so badly that you couldn’t fly. So you and Spencer had been taking advantage of the down time. You couldn’t keep your hands to yourselves.

You ordered room service looking out the window to see that the storm was still going strong. When your food arrived, you sat on the bed beside Spencer who found a documentary on TV for you to watch.

“Do you think it will be this easy, this comfortable with Chloe?” You swallow the food you were chewing before answering. “Um, yeah. I think any relationship worth pursuing will be effortless. It will be natural, kinda like -“ “Breathing.” He finishes your sentence, looking up at you.

“Don’t be nervous. If she’s the one, everything will work out. You’ve kept in touch with her over texts, and she still seems like she’s so excited to go out with you from the messages you’ve shown me.” He moves a loose curl behind his ear. “What if she wants to have sex on the first date?” He asks timidly.

“Then you dick her down! You have nothing to worry about in that department, Spence. Honestly, you’re incredible. You didn’t even need the practice.” You blush as you admit more than you planned to.

He pulls you in for a kiss, large hands cupping your face as his lips press tenderly against yours. As he deepens it, your legs brush against the food you forgot about. You reluctantly pull away, placing the food out of the way. His lips are on yours as soon as the bed gets cleared.

This time the sex feels different. It’s slower, softer, more tender. He takes his time, deliberately dragging everything out. If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was making love to you. You try to push that thought out of your mind as he whispers sweet nothings in your ear, promises of what could never be.

When it’s over, he pulls you into his arms and holds you. You’re thankful that your back is facing him so you can hide your tears. You don’t want him to go on a date with Chloe. You were jealous and you had no right to be. Rules existed for a reason. And you had broken every one of them. This was supposed to be practice, but you had fallen for him so quickly. Probably the first time he touched you, if you were being honest with yourself.

You were going to lose him in a matter of days. You close your eyes trying to commit everything about this moment to memory. How he felt against you, how his hand engulfed yours as he held it, the sweet sound of his breathing.

You had the next day off to rest since it was late when you got home. You spent the night deep cleaning your apartment trying to keep your mind off Spencer’s upcoming date. You couldn’t help but hope the team would get called away for a case, but that wasn’t fair to Spencer. You truly want his happiness, even if it’s not with you. It will just take some time to get over it.

Spencer sits across the table from Chloe. She is even more beautiful in person. She thanks him for the rose he brought her. He tries to focus on her, but he keeps thinking about how you would’ve ordered something he likes too, so you could share your entrees. It was something you had been doing since almost the start of your friendship. Out to dinner with the team, neither of you could decide between the same two meals, so you each decided to get one and split them.

He noticed how she wouldn’t let him finish his sentences. She would either insert what she thought he was going to say or talk over him. Spencer tried to focus on her face, but yours burned in his mind instead. He kept thinking about how you would smile brightly at his lame attempt at a joke, even if you didn’t get it.

Chloe understood them, but she was condescending, explaining why she didn’t find them funny. By the end of the date, he decided that maybe it wasn’t horrible. First dates are supposed to be awkward after all. Not that he had much experience, but that’s how tv always portrayed them. At least that’s what he kept telling himself.

Chloe was a nice girl, so intelligent and beautiful. They had hit it off over text. Maybe she was one of those people who held better conversations over the phone. Maybe she was behaving strangely since it was their first time meeting in person. She could be nervous.

He wanted to give her another chance to prove herself, this was his dream girl after all. Wasn’t she? So he agreed to a second date. She tried to kiss him on the lips when the date was over, but he left her with a chaste kiss on the cheek instead. He pulled out his phone as he walked away. His mind only on one person, you.

Part Eight

Tags (cont. I’m comments. If you wanna be added let me know!)

@cindylynn @multifandom-worlds @mochie85 @modern-mermaid @analethicia @marimorena06 @ghostheartbeat @clownprincess09 @thebiggestscamislife @whistle1whistle @lockwoods-coat-and-reids-vests @twsssmlmaa @cynbx @padlockedhearts @wheredafandomat @salempoe @emarich7 @itzdarling @anonymously-ominous @vivian-555 @cashtons-wife @regulus-black-223048 @nomajdetective @dazedgye @jesuisbenny @simpingforharryandcevans @misacc08 @wowzabowza69 @spencvrr @the-uncoordinated-house-cat @inthehoneymoonwithconnorrk800 @academiareid @nikkisheep @dephylirium @panhoeofmanyfandoms @its-not-too-late-for-coffee @wildernessflora @mypurplecrocs @idkbubs @ajstarkpetrova

#spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x self insert #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #strictly business

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lucysarah-c · 4 months ago

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heyy could you write something about how really levi would confess his feelings? you write so good about him and i just can’t imagine how the canon levi would confess like with words or gestures.

thank you so muchhh

Hi, dear! How are you?

Awww, thank you for saying that! I hope that I keep writing Levi well enough for your enjoyment.

Ah!! You know, I had this EXACT same issue when I had to write Levi confessing in my long fic Levi x reader! I was like, "nothing felt good enough or in-character enough," and to this day, I am PROUD of that declaration!

So ... I'll copy and paste it. Hope you like it! I'll cut certain parts because you don't need them.

If I was conflicted before, this was the moment I truly lost it all: “I want you,” the first part came out confident, but the following part not so much. “No,” as he frowned at his choice of words. “I like you,” he said, less stoic than the first declaration, but there were no doubts about it. His voice shook slightly as the challenge of opening his heart was enormous for him, making his usual stoic appearance and monotone voice disappear into the dark. Leaving him completely vulnerable under my scrutiny. "No, you don’t,” I refused and cut his speech before he could go any further. “Tch, you will never know what I want if I never say it and neither will I know what you want. So don’t go around assuming shit. No, I don’t want to be your friend, and neither do I want to find someone who fits the spot, force you into this or hear that I don’t know what I feel. I’m old enough to be aware of who I want to get involved with. I’ve no idea what he said to you, but I know what I said and I don’t go around saying that to anyone. I don’t say shit I don’t feel, so cut the reading between the lines because I mean what I say or I don’t fucking say it.” There was a momentary pause before he kept going. “If you don’t feel ready for whatever reason, fine, I don’t mind or care or need an explanation. I also know my limits. Waiting isn’t one of them. I’m patient if it’s needed. But sharing? Sharing isn’t in my fucking dictionary, that’s my limit. I don’t want to go around playing shitty games, questioning myself if you’re interested in me, or your ex or any other fucker. Y/N, I have little to fucking offer compared to your other well-raised bastards and I won’t lie about it. I’m loyal, so I won’t go to another chick because you didn’t suck my dick. I’m honest, sometimes too fucking much from what I’ve been told. And god bless the sucker that lays a finger on you; that person would wish to be dead instead. I don’t have a pot to piss in, nor a last name. But if what I said is enough for you, I’ll wait for what it takes. Only if you want me to wait. If not, I walk you to your room and that’s the end of the fucking deal. No harsh shit, I’m man enough to take a no for an answer” Levi appeared to lose his nonchalant facade as his defeated appearance kicked in because of my silence as if he silently said “got it, it’s a no. I don’t know why I got my hopes up”. “If this is another yes or no question, then my answer is yes,” I replied confidently, yet blushed as a sweet smile appeared on my face slowly as I tried to ease out my nerves. Levi couldn’t hide his surprise as he looked at me. Trying to process my positive reply as if it was real, a joke or he was dreaming. Levi stood there probably thinking ‘… not even in my wildest dreams I conceived the option of it working out’ I was expecting him to do the next move, as I was used to, but he seemed so nervous all of a sudden. As if his entire insouciant, stoic self abandoned his body and left him there as a physical representation of ‘I don’t know, I never thought I’d get this far,’ “Are you…” I began the question, slightly tilting my head to follow his confusion, “are you going to kiss me or…?” That snapped him back into his usual self. His calloused hand grabbed the left side of my face, his fingers wrapped around the back of my neck as it forced to be tilted and with little height difference, he pressed his lips against mine. His rough lips moved skillfully against them and I tried to follow him. It was demanding and possessive, owning and strong. My right hand landed on his chest for support as I shyly moaned in his mouth when he tilted to the side to claim my lips better. His hand grabbed my hip and pushed it against his. My breath was getting taken away, and I thought this was, once more, scaling quickly while I got myself ready to part my lips. But Levi broke the kiss as if that was a normal kiss for him. I, who was used to quick, shy pecks on these occasions; wondered if I would ever get used to this. ‘A man of unambiguous and little words, but passionate kisses,’ I thought.

Hope you like it! <3

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rubysgirl32 · 5 months ago

Text

Behind the Cameras

Ruby Cruz x Fem!reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers (kinda), VERY ANGSTY (reader and Ruby get to a fight), swearing, self hatred thoughts, and inner homophobia from reader

Summary: Reader gets paired with ruby for the press tour, which sucked because ruby seemed to constantly be dick around her.

Author's note: I just re edited this, so its more complete and its in second person pov rather than third, so yeah! enjoy 🤍

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Being casted for the second season of Willow was something you never really expected. The audition in itself felt like a fever dream, but actually getting the role felt like your entire life was falling into place, just as you would dream of as a kid. You grew up with Willow, your brother and you were obsessed with George Lucas, so it was a constant binge between Star Wars, Willow and Howard the Duck. It was truly a dream for you, to get to fly to Wales, to be invited into this magical world and meet everyone, especially Warwick. What wasn’t a dream come true, was her.

“And yeah, this is truly a gift being back to playing a fucking disney princess, its crazy to me” Ruby replies at the interviewer, her brushed hair perfectly in place, and her lips forming a stupid perfect smile in such an effortless way as answers the question.

“And with the new cast, how has it been adding new characters and extending the willow family?” The woman asks, shuffling in her seat as she leans in closer for the answer

Ruby’s smile turned plastic quickly. She looked down at her finger and fiddled with her rings.

“Yeah, it was… fun. I mean with these new characters, the stories go further and are truly more interesting. We truly did welcomed everybody with such open arms-”

You stopped the video and looked back at your brother who stood with his arms folded.

“That lying bitch” You gasp “Open arms? Open arms, seriously? She is one of the coldest people I know- she never even once during filming spoke to me, and then says she welcomed me with open arms?” you huff out pure anger as rolling your eyes passing the phone back to your brother. The rest of the cast did receive you with open arms. Everyone was really lovely, and you quickly became a part of the already tight knight family, but ever since the table reading back in October, Ruby has yet to speak or even present herself to you. She dodges you in corridors, leaves whenever you enter the room and once she even left early from training because of you.

“Just wanted to show it to you before you heard from the rest,” Jack shrugged. He then sat next to you on the couch, turned off his phone and threw it softly til the last cushion. You looked back at your brother with a soft smile. God, you were lucky enough to have him around. You truly didn’t know where you would be without him.

“Thanks” you says softly as you grabs the TV remote “Let’s watch something, i need to get that moment off my head”

“How about Star-” Jack begging to say

“I'm not watching Star Wars again” you cut off like always.

He laughs, rolling his eyes and grabs his drink from the center table. The two of you spent the day watching an X-men marathon, eating whatever was left in the fridge and pantry, just like when you were kids. It was not until noon, on the third film, when the silence was broken. Jack looked over at you and smiled sadly.

“I’m worried,” he confesses “Press tour stars tomorrow, and it’s supposed to be this amazing thing where you guys have fun and get to introduce the world to this new season but… i'm scared its gonna get ruined by Ruby’s stupid comments and bullshit”

You sigh knowing very well what he ment. Last week you got informed that you were sadly paired with Ruby for the interviews. Since you were a brand new character and never actually done a press tour for anything, the producers had decided to pair you with someone who already has experience with interviews, and apparently the universe thought that you and Ruby would make a great pair.

“I’ll survive” you says blankly shoving a cockie into your mouth “Plus, we are spending the day talking with other people, so i hope it won't be that bad”

“If anything happens you call me, okay?” He raises his hand and points up his pinky. This is some stupid thing you use to do when you were kids, but every now and then he would bring it back

“Promise” you link your pinkie with his and tightly squeeze them.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

From the moment you woke up at 7 am, a heavy pressure chest seemed to be placed roughly. Started when you got out of bed and followed along to the moment you got into the tall building where the interviews were being made. Your very strict assistant, Lola, told you the plan for the day as they were shown the small break room, where you had to change and put on the interview outfit. It was a light blue and white dress that looked very 60s, some pearl earrings and a necklace that matched. Sometimes an outfit can change your entire mood, so once you were dressed up, you couldn’t help but feel just a bit better. Then the make up artist came in and started applying some soft natural makeup that consisted of blushy cheeks and a soft eyeliner. But even after that, there was still something tense and heavy on your chest that didn’t seem to want to leave you alone. You walked out of the break room, into the place where you would spend the next 7 hours answering questions. You wave hello to everyone on set as the man starts putting on the mic pack on you and checking if your makeup looks good under the lights. You then sat on the chair and took out your phone from the pocket on the dress to see a message from your brother, Jack.

Annoying older brother: Good luck!!

Annoying older brother: Remember our promise, call me if anything happens

You smile and just type back an eye rolling emoji as a response. You put down her phone once you felt someone sitting next to you, and softly reminded yourself where you were and the way you were supposed to behave. The silence took over the room as you left your phone under your leg. You looked over to your right to see Ruby. She looked nice. She was wearing an oversized red blouse and a white jacket, and her hair was messy.

“Hi” You greets softly with a small wave

Ruby looks at you, nods shortly and looks away.

You tried to take the response in a less personal way, looking away and trying to swallow the anxiety away. But once the young interviewer arrives, and Ruby literally stands up to shake his hand and greet him, it becomes more than personal to you. You stood up too, to shake his hands and greet him as he got ready for the interview. They haven’t even started and you were already fiddling with the hem of your dress nervously, like a child.

“Well Ruby, Y/n, I just want to thank you for giving us another season of Willow. We are truly excited to see not only the adventure you go on now, but the new characters as yourself y/n”

You just smiled and nodded in response.

“Now how does it feel to join such a magical and close family, how have they treated you?” The interviewer asked as he shuffled with his cards

What a perfect question.

“It's truly been a gift” you starts, your voice being slightly weak but you quickly clears your throat and begin again “I grew up huge George Lucas fan and honestly at first I was truly terrified of joining the cast and crew, but they really have received me with… open arms” Your words slightly bitter. You notice how Ruby looked at you from the side, clearly noticing your reference “It’s been such a dream come true, really”

The interviewer nodded and read the next card in hand “Now giving to much away, what can you tell us about this new season”

“Well” Ruby stars, with a hand on her jaw “There’s definitely a lot more action. Me and y/n actually have a lot of scenes together where we had so much fun! And the adventures this season are-”

You could hear Ruby speaking but it was like your mind just stopped listening

“...So much fun!”

Her voice ringed in your head again, as your thoughts ran crazy. You couldn't remember a single time you had “fun” with Ruby on set. Actually, you can clearly remember that every fight scene you had together was actually hell, since Ruby had past training and it seemed so easy for her to just pick up on choreography. Every time you got a move wrong or stumbled on the fight, Ruby would roll her eyes and sigh frustrated. Every single scene together was hell for both of them, and Ruby just said they had “So much fun”?

The anxiety in your chest started to slowly become fury, and the confusion of why would Ruby ever lie in an interview if not needed completely took over your thoughts. Your ears turned warm and you fisted her left hand, digging your white painted nail into your palm.

“Right Y/n?” Ruby looked at you and gave you a tight and clearly fake smile. It was obvious from the stare that you were supposed to follow along with her lie

“Yeah” you nod, trying to smile at the interviewer “So much… fun!”

The guy bought it clearly as he continued with his vague and irrelevant questions. As Ruby answered most of them, you just sat back, thinking about Ruby’s words. Every now and then you would nod your head, agree, or even let out a fake laugh, but never really truly talk much. The interviewer didn’t seem to mind, and so you just stayed silent.

“Maybe I wasn't gonna be as okay as I thought I was gonna be” You thought to herself as you fiddled with the ring on your finger. You wished you could be back in your apartment, with your brother, watching stupid movies and laughing like idiots at the simplest things.

“Last question before I leave,” the man announces as he looks at his watch, checking the time “Yesterday, we interviewed Tony and Erin and they told us of the wrapping party you guys had at your house, Ruby. Do you guys have any funny or just stupid memories of that night?”

You cluelessly, tilt your head and look at Ruby who laughs as she clearly knows what he’s talking about.

“Oh my god! The wrapping party was so much fun!” she claps her hands softly, as you stare completely clueless “So yeah, after almost a year of shooting the second season, I invited the cast and crew to the house i was renting, to have a kind of a goodbye party or something but…a funny memory? Oh yeah! We ordered pizza, but I'm talking about tons of pizza, and we made this… kind of tower? We stackled them up until we literally had to get on top of each other to put on the next, and that was honestly so much fun” she said “or when me, Dempsey, Amar and Tony did like a weird karaoke battle? That was fun too”

Something inside of you started to crack slowly. Your head spinning with bullet-like thoughts that seemed to kill every grasp from reality you held. A wrapping party? With cast and crew? With everybody? When was this? Why weren't you invited? Ruby said it was at the end of filming and that was 6 months ago, and you were finding about this now? And then it hit you like a truck. Of course you weren't invited. You were new. You barely knew the cast, got a year too late to the family, of course they were not gonna invite you. The anxiety inside your chest started to rise, stopping right at your throat.

“Tony mentioned it yesterday!” The man laughs “And you y/n?” he then asks you “any favorite memories of that night?”

Ruby turned to look at you and it felt like her gaze left you under pure pressure. It felt like her blue eyes were burned into your head and made the anxiety get even worse. Your fisted hand grew sweaty as you swallowed roughly.

“I-” the words wouldn’t come out but you just tried again doing your best to look as normal as possible “Yeah… The karaoke battle was crazy fun”

The man behind camera yelled cut, the interviewer then excused himself as in came the assessor to come touch up the makeup, outfits and mics. But before anyone could even get close to you, you marched quickly straight to the small break room where you got ready. You closed the door and ran to the desk filled with water bottles. You took one, twisted it open harshly and started chugging the cold water. You could feel it run down your body, but that didn’t seem to help. You took it off your mouth and breathed heavily and quickly, leaving the water bottle with the rest. The first thing that came into mind was texting your brother, so you looked around the room for your phone, moving the cushions and bags.

Three knocks came from the door and then someone just opened it. Ruby came in looking quite weirded out by the mess you were making. She closed the door, causing you to turn around to see Ruby staring at her.

“Ruby” you stammered “I- I thought you were-”

“The interviewer is late” she said coldly “They gave us a break”

“Yeah sorry, I was just looking for my pho-”

“I don’t care” she snapps back

You just nod and bite your lip harshly trying to push back any stupid emotions. You were an actress for god sake, why couldn’t you just fake your emotions. Why can’t you act as if Ruby’s word didn’t mean a single thing. It was so overwhelming that your face clearly started growing warm and Ruby clearly seemed to notice.

“What’s wrong?” She said as she left her purse on the couch, her voice sounded quite genuine instead of annoyed “why are you crying?”

You turns around towards the dresser with a mirror, to see the soft mascara running down your cheek

“Shit!” you swore under your breath, swiping the tear away leaving the black mascara smeared across your face “Shit! Lola gonna kill me” you then ran towards the small bathroom to grab some toilet paper and placed it under the water tab to start trying to clean it away. Your soft swipes turned harsh as the stain on her face didn’t want to leave. If Lola saw you like this, she would be pissed for screwing up her first ever interview “Fuck!”

“Heyheyhey'' Ruby said, grabbing your wrist and stopping the wet toilet paper from slapping your face. Her touch was probably meant to be sweet, but instead it came out quite harsh since her grip on your wrist was quite strong. "Water's not gonna work, it's probably waterproof, just…” Ruby let’s go of you to pushed her hair back with a sigh “Seat on the toilet, let me get some make up remover”

You let go of the wet toilet paper and left it on the sink. Then you sat down on the toilet seat, as tears started to fall down your face. You pushed your hands into your face, completely ashamed of yourself. Your first interview ever and you ended fucking crying in the bathroom

Ruby walked back into the room with a bottle of make up remover and cottons on her hand.

“Come on” she says coldly “We don’t know when the interviewer is arriving” She then kneels in front of you and starts to place some of the liquid on the cotton ball.

“Why did you say that?” You ask in between the tears. It was clear that Ruby was trying her hardest to look away, avoiding your gaze but before she even think of it, you spoke “Why did you say any of that when you know that shit isn’t fucking true”

“I-” she began

“What did I ever do to you?” Your voice broke while speaking. It felt like the anxiety inside of you gripped you tightly making it impossible to even let the words out

Ruby freezes and blinks a few times. She then leaves the bottle on the floor a bit too strongly as she looks back up at you with a frustrated sigh. Her frown is lowered and her looks became a deathly glare.

“Nothing” she says simply taking the cotton in her hand and move it close to your face

“Then why do you ignore me? Why do you always look at me like I'm a bother? Why didn’t you fucking invite me to the wrapping party?” You move your hand away from your face, trying to have a conversation

“Because…” she said before swallowing “Because i…” Her words never really leading anywhere

“Because what?! What Ruby?” The tears that once where on your cheeks where now running down your neck

Ruby shook her head and she stood up and dusted off her pants clearly bothered. She shook her head, her hair swishing perfectly.

“I can’t do this right now” she says walking out the small bathroom with an tired huff “I’m gonna get some air”

You stood up and followed behind her, your slingback heels clacking against the floor

“Ruby!” you call out frustrated “Answer me, please”

Ruby turned and it was clear she was mad, and it was written all over her face. On the way she pursed lips in disgust, in the way her eyebrows met harshly on top of her eyes, on the way cheeks were red and her eyes dead serious. On the way her chest was out proudly and her hands were fisted in the same way your’s were a few moments ago.

“Because…” she says, completely stone cold, and her head tilted to the side “Because you’re… fuck!” her fist raised and shaking in rage as tried to find her words

You took a careful step back, lower lip slightly quivering. Ruby didn’t have to say a word, because you knew, you knew what she meant. You knew everything. You were annoying, you are not part of the cast.

Ruby groaned as she ran her hand through the hair. Then she walked toward you, her steps firm and commanding, intimidating every bone in your body, making you walk backwards completely scared of what might happen now. You walked back to the small bathroom, till you hit the wall. You tried to press yourself against the wall as much as possible, closing your eyes and raising both of her hands, in defense.

Ruby was barely a few inches away, looking at you as you trembled nervously against the wall. Everything seems to be going from bad to worse, and it didn’t help the fact that you were shivering like a scared cat. The short haired girl sighed, placing both of her hands in her face, groaning loudly. You opened a single eye, to see your co-star. Ruby removed her hands from her face to look back at you, both of your eyes locked in. And it was then when you felt her warm lips on top of her. Ruby was grabbing your jaw as she pushed you back against the wall. You froze in place and did not reciprocate the kiss, even though something new inside you roared into life.

Ruby stopped and then separated your lip, to look up at you with your eyes wide open in fear. Ruby inhaled completely terrified as her face turned white.

“Oh my god” She whispered “I am so-”

Ruby interrupted when both of your arms wrapped around her, your chest and shaking lips against hers. At first it was really weird for you. Kissing a girl was different… new. Feeling something for a girl was… new. It took a few seconds for the two of you to melt into the kiss, softly placing your hands around each other, softly caressing and touching each other as much as they could. The kiss was salty with your tears, but sweet with Ruby’s cherry chapstick.

“Guys! The interviewer is here!” Lola yelled as she knocked loudly on the break room door. Her voice quickly made you freeze, stopping the kiss, and turning your once melted warm body to stiff and cold.

Ruby looked back at you, opening her eyes softly to find a single tear falling off of your face. It was like looking at a wax figure. pale and completely frozen in place. The knocks kept pounding against the door so the short girl ran towards it and told Lola they are just talking some stuff and that they will be right back out. You, who snapped back from the pure fear of someone finding you with a girl, reacted and quickly picked up the cotton with makeup remover and wiped it hard against your cheeks.

You were just kissed. By Ruby. Ruby who ignored you for months, Ruby who can’t stand you. Ruby who is… a girl. A girl just kissed you. You kissed a girl. What’s that supposed to mean? Are you gay now? Did you like girls? What about boys? What if someone found out about this? What if her parents found out about her kissing a girl? What if they hated her?

What if Jack hated her?

Before your anxieties turned into catastrophic realities, Ruby came back to the bathroom and stood closely to you. She softly placed her hands on your jaw and moved your face till you were facing her, and no longer the mirror. She took the cotton from your fingertips hand and started swiping it on your cheek and under eye softly, petting and cleaning the black ink from your face. To say you were confused, was to say the least. When you arrived at the building, you swore that Ruby hated you like no one else in the world, but now, she was treating you like one would treat their romantic partner. It didn’t make sense, the sudden change but neither did the strong beating of your heart. By having Ruby’s warm and gentle hand on your jaw, cupping your face carefully and tenderly, it made your heart naturally calm down and made you head grow fuzzy. The soft brush of the cotton in her only made you gaze into an even more peaceful state.

“Done” Ruby said letting go of your face and throwing away the cotton ball “Let’s go”

You wake up from the cold air hitting your cheek and you quickly step back to create some distance between the two of you. You swiped your nose with the back of your hands and looked at the floor nervously. Ruby opened her voice to speak, but you quickly ran out the bathroom and the break room to where a young woman was sitting waiting for you guys. You go to sit on your chair, to find your phone, which you quickly grabbed and texted Jack

Snarky little sister: Hey

Snarky little sister: U were right

Snarky little sister: Can you come pick me up? plz?

Snarky little sister: I really don’t need a car ride back with her

Snarky little sister: i finish a 6

You sent your location and turned off your phone and shoved it under your leg like before. At least you weren’t crying anymore, and with the bit of makeup the assessor just applied, made you now look decent.

The rest of the day was a blur. It was interviews after interview. The same questions being asked over and over. Eventually there was a lunch break where you decided to lock yourself in the bathroom and eat your lunch on your own to drown out the confusing feeling bubbling inside of you. Ruby knocked a few times and tried to talk to you, but you couldn’t even process her words. Every time she tried to talk to you, you would walk away or tried to mutter a “not now” under your breath. These new feelings and emotions felt like bricks under you. The possible reaction from your family made you tremble with pure fear. And the questions the journalist asked her over and over again just made her look like a broken record, repeating over and over the same phrase.

After 6 hours in the same room, you were finally able to leave. Lola tried to talk to you, her tone scary and stern as she scolded you, but you just grabbed your bag and left for the elevator. Even though everything you were wearing wasn't technically yours, you couldn’t bother to change, you couldn’t bear another second in that room with Ruby and with all of those people with their eyes on you. So you just left. Once in the lobby, you saw a text from jack.

Annoying older brother: I'm a few blocks away, wait for me inside

And so you did. You waited in the lobby, tapping your shows anxiously against the marble floor, making it echo around the room. There was a ding from behind you, and you see Ruby, in different clothes, walking quickly up to you. Your airways seemed to close as you turned around and started walking even faster away from her.

“Y/n!” Lola screamed “the car hasn't arrived yet, where are you going?” she looked up from her phone, shaking her disappointment “The chauffeur is 5 minutes away!”

You turned around, walking back carefully not to trip. You tried your best no to meet Ruby’s eye as you simply shook your head.

“Jack came to pick me up” you yell loud enough for everyone to hear, but it was clear that your voice was weak and on the edge of cracking “I’m leaving with him, i'll text you when i get home”

Then Ruby started walking faster and calling you names, to catch up with you, but you left the building and made yourself to the street. You then saw your brother's blue jeep and you quickly jumped in and left. On the rearview mirror you could see Ruby staring back at you, as the car took off quickly, her figure became smaller til she was barely visible.

Jack quickly placed his hand on your knee, and the touch on itself was enough to make you burst into tears once again. You cover your mouth in disappointment of your previous actions. Your sobs soon got louder than the radio, completely drowning all the noise around them. The fingertips on your mouth shaking as you could softly still taste Ruby’s stupid cherry chapstick.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

#ruby cruz #ruby cruz x reader #ruby cruz bottoms #ruby Cruz fanfic #ruby Cruz angst #hazel callahan #hazel callahan x reader #willow 2022 #kit tanthalos #kit tanthalos x reader #tanthamore #my writting #ruby jean cruz

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yunhofications · 2 years ago

Text

rock with you - j.yh

pairings: dom!yunho x switch!fem reader

chapters: 1/2

synopsis: yunho’s a rockstar and doesn’t care about anyone but himself, at all. he loves the attention he recieves, but the only attention that really matters to him is from the girl who can’t seem to stand him at all. well, thats what she tells herself anyway.

warnings/tags: yunho’s kind of a dick, but not really, size kink, dumbification, choking, man handling, biting/marking, praise. hes quite a mean n rough dom, fingering, cheating implied (not by yunho), pet names, drinking. no actual sex in this part

word count: 3.7k

authors note: hi! this is my first ever suggestive fic, i originally was only going to do one part but im going to do two now, if this chapter does well :] i hope you all like it, im new at writing these things!

it was a Sunday night, 9:54 pm to be exact. The bar wasn’t crazy busy considering most people had work the next day and normal individuals wouldn’t spend their free night before work drinking their sorrows away in a lousy run down bar. Not that it phased you in the slightest, you brushed off the judgmental stares and glares from the bartender since you were probably on your 20th shot and you had the tiniest little body. Who the fuck is fitting in that much alcohol without getting drunk? Well, you were pretty tipsy and your eyes were slowly giving out, as well as your entire body, about to hit your head against the wooden bar counter before a hand slips in and stops you from getting a concussion.

You don’t give it much thought, perhaps it was just the bartender, or some random stranger who was afraid you’d die or something from slamming your head down. But it wasn’t. Oh how you wished you were dreaming, and that your mind was playing a little trick on you from all the emotions and all the god damn alcohol that was running through your veins. Then the voice spoke. It felt like nails on a chalkboard, you hated it. “Y/N.” You could hear how smug the voice was, you could hear the smirk on their lips. Fuck.

“Go to hell Yunho.” Your words being just a big fat mumble, moving his hand away and allowing your head to rest against the hard wood counter. Yunho, Jeong Yunho. Many people adored the man, which you never understood why. He was a dick with a terrible attitude and didn’t give a shit about anyone but himself, the nerve of him even coming near you made you wanna snap. Though, you had no energy to do that. You could still feel him next to you, his perfume was strong, and you’d only ever recognised that scent on him, no one else.

“Are you ever gonna stop being a little bitch Y/N? I just saved you from getting a concussion. You should be thanking me.” A scoff left his mouth. It was true though, Yunho didn’t care about anyone else but himself, he adored the attention from others, women. It was all he got, he was a rockstar afterall, who wouldn’t love the attention? Afterall, thousands of women screaming his name as his fingers played away at his guitar, what a life to live. However, as much as he adored all those women, one woman in particular was all he truly desired, to hear her scream his name, only for him to hear, for her to be a mess on his cock, a mixture of his and her cum dripping from her bare cunt. That woman was Y/N, and she couldn’t stand the sight of him.

“I didn’t ask you to, now go away. I don’t need you ro add to my problems right now.” You managed to lift your head and turn to face the dark haired man sitting beside you. It bothered you that he was attractive and that perhaps in another life you’d given him a chance, and maybe if he didn’t have a stick up his own ass and acted like the world revolved around him.

“Problems? Like what? Your only problem is you being an annoying little dog.” Okay, to an extent Yunho could see why you didn’t like him at all, considering all he did was rip into you and just make matters worse rather than at least try and be there for you. All your hatred and dislike for Yunho began just as he started to gain attention, because from the slightest attention his ego grew massive and it bothered you. The two of you had a little history, meeting one another through acquaintances and he was actually really cute, and you were attracted to him in more than one way. That was no longer the case. Now five years have passed and his attitude and ego was unbearable.

“Do you ever fucking shut up? Fuck off, Yunho. Seriously.”

“No.”

“Why’s that?”

“I don’t want to.”

All you could do was give him the biggest eye roll, you barely had any energy left to argue with this idiot in front of you, whining at how frustrated you were with him. “My boyfriend— ex, boyfriend. Cheated on me, so I beg you to leave me alone and let me drink in peace.” You had no intention on telling him that, but you prayed that he’d leave you alone and go home or fuck a girl or do whatever it is that he did. Instead he remained right there, pulling something out of his pocket. A ticket, a ticket to his upcoming show. He was absolutely unbelievable.

“You’re kidding me, right? Do you just carry those with you everywhere? I'm not going, I don’t like your music.” Which was a lie. You listened to his songs whilst getting ready, in the car, when laying in bed.

“Just come will you? And fuck your ex, hes a fucking idiot to let someone like you go, the prettiest woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on.” Yunho meant his words, and he definitely wanted you to attend his show, simply because you’ve never been to one before, and he desperately wanted to show himself off to you in another light. He had to hide the little smile which appeared on his face when you mentioned your ex cheated, he was out of the picture now which meant Yunho had a chance to win you over, and he was determined to.

You’d be lying to yourself if you said your heart didn’t flutter a little when Yunho complimented you. It didn’t mean anything to you, well, you thought it didn’t. You chewed your bottom lip as you snatched the ticket and shoved it in your purse, perhaps it would be good to go, what else were you doing? Moping around that you got cheated on? Ridiculous.

“Whatever.. I’m going now.” Oh but getting up by yourself was a terrible idea, you slid off the barstool and stumbled as soon as you hit the ground, squinting as if it were to make a difference to your vision, but it didn’t. Suddenly you feel some long arms wrap around you tightly to hold you in place, you knew exactly who it belonged to as two large hands gripped the side of your arms. You were in no position to argue or say no, since you were pretty sure you’d black out soon enough, which you did.

The next thing you knew, it was the next morning, your head was ringing and you were in bed, at home.

Huh.

A week had passed since your drunken incident, you barely remembered it and still couldn’t put your finger on how you ended up at home in bed, surrounded by your pastel walls. Well, no point dwelling on it now. You were currently sitting upon your white little wooden vanity, gripping onto a curling iron and letting your hair fall as you let go. It was the day of Yunho’s show and you decided to go, why? Who knows. You didn’t even remember how you got around to getting the ticket, and why it happened to be in your purse. it was such a blur to you. A white lace dress with little pink bows at the shoulders was upon your body, the same dress you wore the night you two met for the first time. It wasn’t intentional, not by any means and that memory had slipped your mind. You thought it looked rejected sitting in the back of your closet, so why not wear it? You’d never wear anything to purposefully grab his attention anyway.

“Shit.” It was 5:30, which meant you were running a little later than originally planned— why does it matter though? He probably won’t even notice that you're there.

Dashing around your apartment you grabbed your ink coloured clutch bag which contained the ticket and a few other essentials of yours before grabbing your keys and checking yourself in the mirror by your door before going out to your car. Your phone automatically connected to the bluetooth system in your car and at that moment your phone began to ring, it was Wooyoung. The two of you had been friends since you were in diapers, literally. It was because of Wooyoung, that you met Yunho, unfortunately. What an idiot.Foot on the gas pedal and you were off, pressing the answer button upon the steering wheel.

“Hey Woo, I'm driving right now. What's up?”

“Where are you going? I wanna go out for food, meet me?”

“Ah.. about that, I’m actually going to Yunho’s show..” You’d wondered if he even heard you, because it went silent and you spoke quietly when saying that sentence. But he did hear you, loud and clear.

“YUNHO? I thought you hated him! Why are you going?! Tell me!” The male's voice was extremely loud, almost bursting your eardrums. You hated cutting him off— not true. But right now you didn’t have time to explain, you were practically speeding your way to the venue.

“I’ll tell you later, okay? I promise you. I gotta go.” Just like that, the line disconnected with the click of a button.

Arriving at the venue, you were faced with the largest queue you'd seen by far, sprawling out into the parking lot. The sight was a complete eyesore, however you were certain Yunho absolutely loved the sight.

Lucky for you, Yunho was kind enough to give you priority access tickets, so you could skip the queue. A good thing of course, being around all those fan girl’s would possibly lead you to have an aneurysm. And thankfully, they were seated tickets as you hated standing up and being surrounded by sweaty people, especially sweaty teenage girls and possibly grown women who’d just be screaming for Yunho. Your seat happened to be a balcony seat, and you were the only one there.

Yunho knew what he was doing, he would be able to see you perfectly from there, that's if you actually decided to come. He was nervous, so nervous in fact to go on stage and then be faced with the disappointment of you not being there. The man was infatuated by you and sometimes he really hated it, why you? Why did it have to be you? Either way, time was ticking and it was time to head to the stage. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. Ever since he took you home last week, you were the only thing in his mind, day and night you flooded his brain, thoughts of you being fucked, the thoughts of you simply belonging to him. It was driving him insane.

The lights dimmed within the venue, and colors of red and white flashed on the stage, indicating that he was about to come out. For some reason that caused you to feel sick, a pit in your stomach. Why am I even here? I don’t even like him. Yet here you were, in a seat assigned especially for you. Not that you knew that, you had no idea how this ticket got into your possession in the first place.

A loud bang made the floor shake beneath you, startling you for sure. White and red confetti filled the room as Yunho was now on stage, seems as though he was standing on a lifting stage. You began to chew on your bottom lip anxiously, the crowd went wild as began with his first song. Whatever, he’s still an asshole.

Yunho’s ego was always boosted immensely as soon as he appeared on stage, hundreds of people screaming his name, posters and banners just for him. Absolutely perfect. But what was even more incredible, was the girl who appeared to hate him so much, was standing in the balcony he left just for you. The smirk which was painted on his lips was very evident as he pretty much groped the mic whilst his gaze met yours, he didn’t maintain it for long, but long enough to irritate her for sure. Honestly he didn’t expect you to come, especially because you were pretty drunk the night he gave you that ticket. Nevertheless, he was absolutely smitten. He’d watch how you’d rip your eyes from him every time your eyes met, he was absolutely loving this.

The cold breeze brushed against your face as you exited the venue, you were surprised with how you were able to stay the entire time, though there were many instances you wanted to storm out everytime you noticed the smug look on his face. You seriously couldn’t stand the man, but why was your heart fluttering if you hated him? Maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you thought you did.

You watched as fans walked out of the venue, some with tears running down their faces and sobbing about how much they loved Yunho, which could only get an eye roll and scoff out of you, how ridiculous. You took some time before deciding to walk back to your car, enjoying the breeze and feeling of the night. You happened to park quite far, and the area was deserted pretty much. You were about to enter your car, when you froze.

“Y/n.” A voice called out to you, the same voice you had been hearing for the last three hours. Jeong Yunho. Did he follow you?

“Hi jackass.” You turned around to face him, his body a lot closer to yours than you expected it to be. Crossing your arms across your chest, you tilted your head at him.

“Thanks for coming, didn’t expect you to.” The man was going to attempt to have a decent and human conversation with you, however In that moment, Yunho realized what you were wearing, the expression upon his face was different from his usual smug look. It was desire, absolute filthy desire. Yunho became enamored by you that day you two met, and here you were, wearing the cute little dress which made him obsessed with you forever. Did you know? You did this on purpose, surely.

“Are you trying to just make me fucking crazy? you know what you're doing don’t you?” His body was inching closer to yours, making you press your back against your car door.

“What on earth are you talking about?” You were clueless, but you could feel your cheeks heat up as he got closer, gripping onto the bottom of your dress tightly. If you hated him so much, why the fuck were your panties getting soaked?

“That dress.. fuck y/n are you really that fucking dumb?”

“What d— oh crap.” How didn’t you realize? You were dumb, so fucking dumb. “So what? It doesn’t mean anything.” Your heart was fucking racing, it definitely did mean something. How did you forget? He didn’t. He never forgot anything.

“It does to me, ever since I saw you in this dress that showed just enough for me to imagine you under me, I haven’t stopped thinking about you. Did you know that? You didn’t, because you’re a dumb little bitch.” Yunho didn’t intend on insulting you, but he knew she wasn’t bothered by that, a smirk painted his lips as he noticed your change in demeanor, your cheeks flushed pink, legs squeezing together.

“Yunho fuck y—“ But before you could continue, his large hand came to cup your jaw from underneath, whimpering under his touch. Who knew this asshole could turn you into a dumb slut just like that? Leaning into your ear, his hot breath made your body shudder.

“Shut up, shut the fuck up.” A growl from him before his lips crashed against yours ever so harshly, his tongue swiping your bottom lip, muffling the moans which threatened to escape your lips. Usually your first instinct would be to push him away but this time you couldn’t. His hands moved to grip onto your hips tightly as he pressed himself against you. You could feel how hard he already was just against you, making you soak your panties within just a couple minutes. You were out in the open, no one was around but the rush of knowing anyone could see you any second only made you more heated, your arms finally deciding to move and wrap around Yunho’s neck.

Yunho pulled away, dragging your bottom lip with him, biting on it as one of his hands slipped, letting it slide to your white lace panties, your cheeks turning scarlet red as you realized how soaked they really were, whimpering as he pushed them to the side. Fuck, a little touch was enough to send you to the sky.

“You always act like you hate me yet look at you, wet as shit like a dumb slut. My little baby.” He hissed, his tone a little mocking as two of his slender fingers entered your wet, sloppy, cunt. causing you to throw your head back against your car. He hadn’t even started yet. His fingers sliding in easily due to your arousal, pumping them in and out of you, abusing your tiny little cunt just as he always wanted. Your core was practically burning from the sensation of his fingers, they were pistoning inside you.

“Y-Yun..” You moaned out stupidly, he was only fucking you with his fingers and you could barely talk coherently. How pathetic? Yunho loved it though, he was waiting for this day for so long, to have your head so cloudy to the point you could only mumble his name, to be a mess on his fingers. A dream. Oh how beautiful you looked, your eyes rolling back, pressed against your car under the moonlight. Yunho’s brow cocked, tilting his head slightly and sinking his lips onto your neck, sucking and nibbling against your delicate porcelain skin, painting your skin purple, his tongue swiping his artwork once he was finished.

Yunho decided to insert another finger, watching you squirm was a delight to his eyes. The tent in his pants threatened to push past the fabric, perhaps even some precum already at the tip. He was desperate to fuck you, but he wanted to do it properly, and prep you of course before he took you home and absolutely destroyed you. Besides, the thrill of someone spotting him finger you senseless in the parking lot was a rush, especially to his hardening cock.

The sloppy and wet sounds coming from his fingers in your cunt was beautiful, filling the air. However as soon as he felt you tighten around his fingers he pulled them out, stuffing his fingers in his mouth to suck them clean, taking in your sweet taste. “You taste incredible whore. Though.. you think I'm gonna let you cum? The only time you get to do that is on my cock.” Once again, his mocking tone irritated you and you were beyond pissed that you were denied your orgasm. The man was edging you and you hated it, squeezing your thighs together.

“Fuck you Yunho.” You spat, huffing and crossing your arms across your chest. Yunho simply laughed in amusement at your reaction. “So are you gonna fuck me or what?” The sheer annoyance in your voice only made his cock twitch, he absolutely was infatuated by you, he loved your bitchyness.

“Im not done with you just yet, get in the backseat.” Happily you obliged, thinking he was going to slide his cock into you, you hobbled around into the back and laid down, he came in after you, closing the door and pressing himself down. Yunho teasingly grinded his hips against you so you could feel him, and fuck was he hard, you whined under him, groaning when he moved to slide your dress up and slide down your panties completely, shoving them in his pocket. Gotta keep a souvenir right? “Let me get another taste of you.”

You couldn't help but grumble, he was having so much fun and all you wanted was to be fucked into next week. But of course with Yunho that wasn't possible whatsoever. The man shuffled back and sunk his head down to meet your cunt, the sweet smell of your arousal allowed a soft moan to escape his lips before his tongue swept along your soaked folds, his hands gripping onto her skin, as his lips wrapped around her clit and sucked away, looking up to see her face scrunched up, her back ever so slightly arched. Yunho couldn’t get enough of her taste.

Your fingers ran through his hair, tugging on it as he sucked your clit softly, the moans parting from your mouth getting increasingly louder as he continued to swipe his tongue. You were well aware he’d deny another orgasam of yours, it wasn’t fair. The sensation was so different to what you'd experienced before from other partners. Yunho was definitely skilled. It only made you more eager to see how well he’d fuck you. The situation was quite bizarre. A week ago, you wouldnt of thought that you’d be lying in the backseat of your car having Yunho eat out your pussy.

Just like you predicted though, Yunho stopped as soon as you were close once again, being denied your second orgasm. “I fucking hate you.” You groaned, kicking his chest with your foot slightly as he scoffed.

“If you hated me so much, I wouldn’t be tasting you.”

“Fuck you.”

“You will sweetheart, just patience. Now, lets go home okay? I'm sure youre dying to cum.”

Yunho laughed as he left the back of the car and entered the front, he was in the drivers seat.

“Well? Come on. You can give me head as we drive.”

All you could do was roll your eyes as you shifted to the front seat, climbing your way forward and glared at him. “Im not doing it.”

“That's alright, my cock will be filling you up soon anyway.”

To be continued.

675 notes · View notes

wannawritefast · 1 year ago

Text

Comfortember 2023 Day 6: “Notes”

A/N: My sporadic contribution to Comfortember. It’s short but Johnny Cage bbs come get y’all juice. It’s my birth month and I’m closing in on the end of my semester so I can’t promise anything but please enjoy!!

Pairing: Johnny Cage x Reader

Warnings: none, fluff :)

Notes. Johnny left them everywhere. Don’t get him wrong. He definitely preferred the convenience of using his phone to send you little memos. It was instant and Johnny could really accommodate his own attention span by using his phone but when he found out on accident how much you loved them, he made a point of it.

You both still remembered the first of its kind.

A pink sticky note on the back of your script that said “And it was all a dream!” with the most hastily-drawn smiley face ever.

You laughed when you saw it. It was a miracle that it hadn’t become a casualty to the rough handling of your scripts before you discovered it.

He had to have done it when you were putting your post-its in your script, marking it up the night before. You hadn’t thought much of the clumsy kiss he gave you when he checked in as the sun went down. Then again you hadn’t been paying that close attention to him or anything else for that matter. A glass of water. A “How’s it going, baby?” A stumble and a peck. And his leg and hand knocking right into the back of the thick stack of 8.5 by 11 copy paper in your grasp as he had moved to sit next to you.

The bump into the script in your hand had been completely intentional, you realized with delight at the table read. It made your Instagram story in seconds accompanied by the words ‘original illustration by @johnny.cage’ and some pink hearts in the top right corner.

That had sealed it.

The next one you found was in your purse. Well, not your purse exactly. It was in the compact in your purse. Blue. “Hey, good-lookin.’” A winky face. It had fluttered out as you were landing out of the country for a shoot. You still had your neck pillow on. You sent Johnny one of the ugliest selfies you had ever taken with it. Against your protests, it became his lock screen photo.

Then they truly popped up everywhere. Your boyfriend was relentless.

A set of expensive rings you’d stared at a little too long on Rodeo. Purple sticky note. “For my precious.” A noble but indecent-looking stick figure attempt at Gollum was near it, partially scribbled out.

Surprise coffee in your trailer. Yellow note. Sunshine with sunglasses.

New boots, courtesy of Johnny. Pink. “Step on me in these.”

Sleeping in while he had left at the crack of dawn. Pink. “Busy all day. Sushi at our regular spot for dinner.” Heart.

Almost all of them made your Instagram story. The dick that looked like it had been drawn by a middle school boy on a blue sticky note slapped to the bathroom mirror, for example, hadn’t made the cut. The ones that did though… Johnny reposted each within 5 minutes, no matter what time it was.

Like the orange sticky note you woke up to under your glasses that said ‘Jinkies!’ You had gone to bed and left them on your nightstand at 4 am. Johnny had stayed up with you. He had left at 6 am for the day. It made you worry about his sleep schedule.

It didn’t matter that you couldn’t keep up with his god-like speed in making unique sticky notes. You posted them. And you kept and remembered all of them. All of them. Yes, even the blue doodle dick.

Again, Johnny definitely preferred sending you texts and voice memos as soon as he felt like you were forgetting how hot you were, which was usually several times a day. It should also be noted that the sticky notes never detracted from the amount of attention he was already giving you. Johnny was a beast at reminding you how much he loved you.

As he had said it once: “There’s no threshold, baby. I’ll die telling you how sexy your walker is; the last sticky note I ever leave you will tell you the same thing.”

He slapped one on your ass after he had said that. Yellow. “Johnny Cage wuz here.”

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calumfmu · 7 months ago

Note

could u maybe write an angst fic where steve leaves reader for nancy? based on traitor by olivia rodrigo. maybe she writes him a letter/song?

Yess baby of course. Here it is. Thank you for your long continued patience and for the others—I promise I’m getting to them.

2.4k; cw: cheating (but not really), swearing, angst, Steve’s a dick—and not in a cute way.

You had to admit to yourself that you knew it was always weird. How fast Steve had gone from pining over Nancy and always thinking about her to suddenly being interested in you. You thought it was a dream come true at first, something that he had finally came to his senses about. It had been years you had liked Steve, pining over him during high school, always pressed to the background, but always there.

Getting to know him was the easiest part of it all, learning the way that his body fit into you, like two pieces of the same puzzle. He was always sweet, so kind to you, called you beautiful even when you felt like it was your worst days. You loved Steve Harrington. Loved everything about him because you knew how deep his love could truly go. There was one thing though.

Your head sat against his chest, ear pressed to his sternum while he laid underneath you, half propped up on the couch. Your eyes were dropped low as he ran his fingers through your hair, trailing them along the hair at the nape of your neck, dancing over the skin. The hug you two found yourself in was lazy, but comfortable, a tangle of limbs that had it hard to decipher where one body ended and the other began.

“Don’t fall asleep on me now,” he whispered, laughing softly as you hummed at him. His calm heart beat was felt through his sweater, lulling you further into slumber.

“Shut up!”

Robin’s voice was heard from the kitchen—loud and brash—like it always was. The two of you heard the click of the receiver as she threw it down, her stomps announcing her arrival into the room.

“Hey Robin, when are you going to stop running my phone bill up?” Steve questioned, shrugging at her with a faux frown as she was wide eyed, hand on her stomach. You laughed at his words, knowing just how much he would rather have her in his house, running up any bill than anywhere else in the world.

“Oh quiet, you know you don’t even pay a single bill on this house,” she muttered, waving a hand to brush off his words.

You rubbed your head against his chest, turning slightly to look at her standing in front of you guys. Steve awaited her next words, eyebrows raised as she took a deep breath.

“You guys are never going to believe this,” she was grimacing her words, mouth exposing her teeth in an awkward fashion. She made a pause, pressing her hands in front of her in the air.

Steve raised a hand from your hair, urging her on before placing it on your back. “Well… spit it out.”

She rolled her eyes, “Jonathan and Nancy broke up. Like officially. Broke up, broke up.”

You waited for the next line, waited for some jaw dropping moment. Not having to wait long, your eyes crinkled in confusion, feeling Steve’s heartbeat beneath his chest kicking up a notch. He shifted below you, your head falling from its resting place as he sat up, suddenly.

“Wh-what do you mean?” His voice was concerned, slightly shaky as you sat up, rubbing your eye from where it had caught on his sweater in his hasty movement. Your side eye was lethal, boring into him as he was staring deeply into Robin’s eyes.

“I know! Isn’t that crazy?” She exclaimed, eyes wide as she waved her arms around.

You felt like the odd one out, chewing your bottom lip as she two of them discussed the separation. Clearing your throat, you closed in on yourself, clasping your hands at your waist.

“Can I ask—“ the two of them looked at you, cut off mid-speech. “Who’s Nancy?”

Robin’s eyes widened as she straightened up, mouth clamping shut as she briefly glanced at Steve. He was silent, staring down at his hands.

“Steve, you didn’t—“ she shook her head, briefly shutting her eyes. “She’s, uhh, how do I-? She’s Steve’s ex, well—friends now, but ex.”

You nodded, glancing over at him as he found interest in the couch, picking at a loose thread. It dawned on you that you were only aware of one person from his past, that girl he was with in high school, the reason why his reputation turned sour. The most you heard of her was from other people around town, brief memories of her from high school, everything but from Steve himself.

“Wait, Wheeler? Junior year Wheeler?” You questioned, confusion crossing your features. Steve cleared his throat, a loud cough that filled the awkward silence in the air.

“Yeah, that doesn’t matter now,” he said, ignoring the pointed look Robin gave the two of you, choosing to walk out of the room. “She’s just a friend now.”

You couldn’t help, but linger you gaze on him, doubting his words even as he leaned in to press a kiss to your forehead. There was a weird sting in your chest, a feeling that felt like a forewarning.

Your reflection stared back at you, a hollow ghost of a shell as you applied your moisturizer, smearing the cool gel across your cheeks. It was weird, seeing yourself like this. Stuck inside of a memory of a person, you didn’t even recognize yourself anymore.

It was late—three in the morning, the comedown of another argument you had with Steve, over something stupid he had done or said earlier, you couldn’t remember it at this point. Maybe it was something you had done or said at this point, possibly joking about him hanging out with his ‘other girlfriends’, something that used to make him laugh, but now had him on the defense.

As you finished up your night routine, his footsteps came down the hall, slowly creeping open to door with the push of his socked foot. His head peaked around the corner, his brown eyes widening as they caught sight of you.

“I thought you were gonna be in bed,” he said, making his way over to your bed. His shirt was off, exposing mole dotted skin, hair on his abdomen, trailing down into the waistline of his pants.

Three months ago and you would’ve jumped him in that moment, exhaustion the only thing on your mind lately.

“Couldn’t sleep.” Your voice was curt, short responses residual from the argument. Glancing at him in the mirror, you could see his eye roll.

He turned over, back to you as he flicked off the bedside light. It left you in darkness, your own eyes rolling in response as you had no choice but to go to bed next to him, awkwardly shuffling under the sheets.

He breathed deeply, body rising and falling with his breath, tucked away in his corner. You stared at his back in the darkness, sadness over your features as you adjusted to the dim room, only lit by the moon shining through parted blinds.

“Steve?”

Your voice was small as you said his name, waiting a few moments before he turned around to face you. You could see the reflection of the moonlight in his eyes, slightly glowing as he traced your face.

“What’s wrong, babe?”

Your heart ticked, the first time he had called you that in months. It was the bare minimum, the sheer uttering of the word reminding you of why you fell for him.

“What were you doing?” He was confused, brown crinkling asked he reached over to run a hand down the length of your side. His fingertips got caught at the hem of your night gown, slowly pushing the material up so it exposed more of your thigh.

“What are you talking about?” His fingertips ran circles on your skin, goosebumps prickling up underneath the touch.

“After we argued,” you said, breaking eye contact as you suddenly became nervous. “You disappeared. You always do around this time, when you think I’m asleep.”

His hand left your thigh, it drew into him like there was a strong magnet, like something had burned him. You could hear him thinking, gears turning as he thought of a lie to tell you.

He settled on the truth.

“I was, uh, just talking to Nancy,” he said, indifferent in his tone. You nodded, biting the inside of your lip.

“Nancy?”

He nodded, your eyes seeing it out of your peripheral as you were still not looking at him. Steve didn’t know what to say, choosing to wait for you before he dug himself in a hole.

“About what?”

“Just, uhm, things, I don’t know,” he ran a hand through his hair, turning so he laid on his back. Staring up at the ceiling, he tilted his head to the side, taking a deep breath before closing his eyes. “We’re friends, so…”

A wetness stung at the corners of your eyes as you closed them, wiping away a stubborn tear that fell down your face. “Yeah… friends.”

It had been two weeks since your breakup with Steve, 15 days to be exact. Two weeks of crying, shoving your face with anything you could see, watching shitty romance movies with Robin, and trying to distract yourself with anything you could—wine and Dirty Dancing were your latest endeavors.

Robin sat opposite of you, handing you a tissue as you began to sob at the film, Patrick Swayze having a close up. She side eyed you, biting back the smirk that sat on her lips.

“Babe, it’s not even a sad part,” she muttered, shaking her head as you tossed your head back on the couch, lips finding your drink, wrapped around a crazy straw found in your kitchen that led the drink into your mouth.

“It’s so sad because perfect men do exist,” you whined through sobs, squeezing your eyes shut. “And I just lost mine.”

Robin sighed, placing the tissue box aside as she leaned into you. Her hands wrapped around your waist as much as she could, her head pushed into your stomach.

“It’s okay, Steve’s a dummy anyways,” she said, you knew she was lying. He was still her best friend, even though she chose to comfort you during this breakup. It had been your decision anyways, deciding to take a break when things got too tough between you guys.

“Isn’t he?” You sighed, wiping your face as she straightened up, removing herself from you. You ran a hand over your forehead, feeling heat come off of your skin. “He’s going to so regret this.”

Robin gave a toothy grin, pride covering her face as you seemed to come to your senses. “There she is.”

You sat up from the couch, legs wobbling as the alcohol began to settle in. Your hands found your hips, triumph high in your shoulders. “He’s regretting this. I was the best damn thing to happen to him.”

“Damn straight,” your friend agreed, taking a sip from your wine.

“He’s going to realize that he needs me,” you said, stomping to emphasize your point. “Maybe he’s realized that now, it’s been a while you know.”

Her face fell as you continued speaking, her lips forming around silent words. “Okay, well maybe—“

“Maybe he’s giving me space,” you tapped a finger against your face, thinking. “I should call him!”

Robin’s jaw dropped, her brow furrowing the most it possibly could as she stood up off the couch. You were quick, running to the phone before she could stop you, your fingers dialing that memorized number. It rang as she stood across from you, eyes wide as she shook her head, mouthing the words ‘No, no, no,’ over and over.

You figured it was because you were a little too drunk for this, you were bound to say something you were going to regret.

“Harrington home!”

It wasn’t Steve. That high pitched voice that answered the phone. It wasn’t his mom or anyone who should be at the home at this hour. It was her. Nancy. The girl who had plagued your relationship despite never being apart of it, despite being friends with your boyfriend—your ex.

You didn’t realize the phone had clattered to the floor, you stumbling back to the living room or sinking to your knees in front of the coffee table, your elbows resting to cradle your head in between your hands. You didn’t notice Robin kneeling beside you, calling your name as she rubbed small circles at the small of your back.

“Babe,” she whispered, pulling you out of your trance with the nickname she called you.

You looked at her, watching as she came to focus, the room finally not spinning. It wasn’t even the alcohol that had you in this state, it was the reality you had been longing to desperately ignore hitting you in the face.

“Is he—“

You couldn’t get the words out, a wave of nausea hitting you as you thought of it. You thought of Steve and Nancy, them starting—or finishing?—the memories that you once had.

She nodded, avoiding eye contact as a sob escaped you. Your chest hurt, feeling hollow and empty as she confirmed your worst fear. Robin fully wrapped you into your arms, pulling you into her chest as your cries filled the room.

Her arms were warm, felt like somewhat of a home, but nothing like the oasis that Steve had been.

“It’s been two weeks,” you muttered, shaking your head as she rubbed your back, her fingertips ghosting along the skin. The old sweater you wore bunched up underneath her touch.

“I know,” her lips pressed to the top of your hair, comforting you as you experienced the worst heartbreak of your life. You weren’t used to this side of her, but forever grateful for who she had become.

“How long have they been together?”

She was silent for a moment, sucking her tongue against her teeth as she thought of what to tell you.

“I-I don’t think you want to know.”

That was all it took for you to fully break inside. The fact that Steve was everything you had believed he wasn’t. The gentleman imagine you had of him was gone, his desperation and love for Nancy never going away, despite the years you spent together as a couple. It took the sound of her breakup with Jonathan to get him to fold, to get him to start fighting so you had no excuse to end things.

He was terrible. He had betrayed you in everywhere possible.

You hated Steve Harrington. Hated everything about him because you didn’t know a single thing about him.

Masterlist. Inbox and requests are open! <3

a/n: I hate mean steve with no pay off. He’s a jerk here, but it was an amazing request that was sent in. Once again babe, Ty for your patience. I hope this sufficed.

#my writing #Steve Harrington x you #Steve Harrington x reader #angst #requests #ughhh #this pained me to write #but im ngl #this is my headcanon bc I can actually see Steve doing this for Nancy #he loves that girl

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