#transported to a really good hospital bc of how serious it was

[autumnalfallingleaves]

Happy Thanksgiving I'm thankful my power hasn't gone out and my aunt isn't dead

[threeletterslife]

For Everland

→ [2/7] of the Society Series

→ summary: Yoongi is supposed to be your patient. He's not supposed to threaten your so-called relationship with your lifetime partner, Jeon Jungkook. You're not supposed to love him—you shouldn't be able to.

→ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader | PG-15

→ genre: 97% angst, 3% fluff | dystopian!au 

→ warnings: profanity, making out, implied sex, infidelity (kind of?), blood, death, hyperventilation, depictions of a seizure (oc works at a hospital so), mentions of the afterlife, descriptions of getting shots/needles, a character has a missing leg (poor bby)

→ wordcount: 17.7k

→ a/n: this is loosely inspired by the great lois lowry’s the giver. i grew up reading that book omg 😭😭🥺and writing this fic was sO fun bc if i had to choose a dystopian society to live in for the rest of my life, it would HANDS DOWN be this one

cr.

It's over.

Thank goodness, it's over.

It's easily the worst part of the job. The transport room is painfully white and frighteningly silent. The only comfort you have is your ocean linen hand soap that sits loyally on the side of the sink. You pull off your latex gloves slowly, tossing them in the trash and turning on the warm water to wash your hands. The familiar, sea breeze scent punctures the room, soothing your jittery nerves. It seems to warmly congratulate you for orchestrating another successful transport.

Thank god. You won't have to do the procedure for another few weeks.

You make a bee-line toward the hospital closet, quickly shrugging off your spotless lab coat and pulling on your worn-out, fuzzy sweater. Already, you're feeling a bit better just being in your normal clothes. Professional attire makes you feel solemn and serious. You hate it.

But other than having to do the procedure in the transport room quite often, you enjoy your assigned career.

The procedure is only inevitable, you suppose, as you start to walk home from your career unit. Jungkook, your assigned partner, isn't waiting for you today, so he must be at home, making dinner. You begin to fast-walk before you accidentally break curfew a second time—the first time was embarrassing enough.

But to keep your mind busy and away from shutting down due to boredom, you reflect back on the day's work.

It's definitely not easy being a nurse, but you take the job with immense pride. Because without you, no one would be able to get to Everland. When you'd first received your career assignment, the Council had proudly told you that you were the very bridge between the society—Tagna—and Everland. They told you that you should take your assigned career with pride.

Everland. How do you even begin to explain that place? It's a paradise, they say. The Council tells every citizen of Tagna the general idea, but only you're gifted with the details. They told you that the skies are blue and the sun shines brightly but never too much. It is spring all year round in Everland. The land boasts serene nature and lakes that stretch across the grassy lawns. The homes are built from cedar wood and are sturdy against the whispering breezes at night.

Of course, you've never seen Everland for yourself. In fact, the Council makes it very clear that no one who has been to Everland has come back to Tagna. You suppose if you lived in paradise too, you wouldn't want to leave.

Some are transported to Everland earlier in their lives; you've worked with a handful of newborn babies, young children and even teenagers. Others are transported later, after thoroughly experiencing the structured and well-disciplined society of Tagna; there were more adults, grandmothers and grandfathers who you transported to Everland. But in the end, every person in Tagna—yourself included—would earn a chance to visit Everland themselves. It's just a matter of time... and luck.

As a nurse, it's up to you to take care of the patients. You're supposed to talk to them, keep them company, comfort them, be their closest friend—until it's time for them to be transported. The transportation is also part of your job, but the least favorite part for you.

Maybe you hate the procedure and going through with the transport because you get quite attached to your patients—you don't want them to leave. But maybe... and deeper inside you, you hate the procedure because you're jealous.

You can't deny that you want to experience this Everland. You've come close to the paradisiacal land more times than any other citizen of Tagna. But the Council seems to be intent on keeping you in society so you can serve those in need.

Goddamn. Every time you step into that small, white room, every time you put on your latex gloves, you wish it were you, sitting in the hospital bed, instead of your patient.

When your assistant rolls in the medical cart with supplies, you can't help but spend an extra few seconds gazing longingly at the clear serum in the syringe. The sharp, pointed needle glints in the white light, which brings a small, sad smile to your face. That's the serum that puts your patient to sleep—well, physically. Their minds are already flying through dimensions, zipping past other worlds to land in Everland. Their bodies will follow suit later.

It's unsettling though. You hate how the clear liquid disappears through the skin the more you press the pad of your finger on the plunger of the syringe. There is also an unspoken agreement with all the people in the room to stay absolutely silent. The silence is unsettling to you.

Very rarely, your patient has to be strapped into their seat. But it becomes quite obvious when you're tending your patient before the transport whether they'll need a strap. You assume the shot isn't too painful, judging from the majority of the reactions of your patients. But you're not really sure. And it's not your job to know. The Council is extremely strict about assigned careers.

Sometimes, it's unsettling to watch your patient fall asleep. Their eyes begin to flutter rapidly and their limbs become limp, their head lolling to the side. As a tradition, you have to walk towards your patient, your shoes clacking against the white floor. You hold their hand and speak your last goodbyes.

"Remember the lines we rehearsed? The ones we went over every day, honey?" you say every time.

There's always a mixed response from the patients. Sometimes they nod, sometimes they shake their heads. Other times, they don't even answer you—when the serum works too quickly and they're already halfway crossing dimensions in their minds. It usually doesn't matter. You recite the rehearsed line yourself.

"For us and for Everland."

On good days, your patient says the line with you; it's their very last words before they would leave Tagna forever and enter Everland. When their body goes slack and their eyes close, you have to double-check their pulse—for the transportation to Everland is not possible with a beating heart. The injected serum is merely a catalyst that will help your patient transport to Everland. And once the patient's mind is already at Everland, their body will follow, and they will wake up in paradise.

The unsettling feeling does not leave until some of your assistants enter the room to roll your patient's hospital bed away. You always give them a nod of acknowledgment but you never speak to them—just in case any loud noise might disrupt your patient's safe travels.

Every transport procedure drains you. But Jungkook's always waiting for you somewhere, waiting to replenish your energy and shower you with attention. He's always insisting that you take a rest, which, in his language, means to go on a lunch coffee date with him. But you're usually too busy to accept.

You manage to reach your house unit before curfew, opening your door and nearly collapsing on the living room couch.

"Sweetie?" you hear Jungkook calling you from the kitchen. It takes you a moment to realize he's cooking spaghetti, which makes you lift your head gratefully.

"Yeah?" you say.

"Are you tired?" he calls. "I made spaghetti, but I can wrap it up for you so you can have it for breakfast tomorrow if you want to sleep."

"No, no, it's fine," you say, heaving yourself up from the couch and stumbling into the kitchen. "I want to eat dinner with you."

Jungkook smiles brightly. Normally, you leave him to eat his meals by himself. "Did something good happen today?" he asks as he pulls out the chair for you and places two still-hot bowls of spaghetti on the table.

"Not really," you shrug, sitting down and grabbing your fork. "It was normal as work goes."

"How was the transport, then?"

"Routinely," you say, stuffing a forkful of spaghetti in your mouth. "Mm, this is good, Jungkook," you hum, swallowing. Jungkook beams at your compliment. "The patient was a grandmother, and she recited the lasting line with me, so that was good."

"For us and for Everland?"

"Yeah." You nod.

You like it when Jungkook discusses work with you. Because in your opinion, your career units are the only thing the two of you have in common. Which was the whole point of assigned partners, anyway—to match people up according to their career units. The Council says it makes couples more compatible. You're indifferent.

It's silent for the rest of dinner. Jungkook knows you don't like to come home to small talk after doing it for work all day. And you don't find it interesting when Jungkook starts to go off in tangents about the new baseball lineups the Council approved of. You do the dishes while Jungkook clears off the table and cleans the kitchen floor.

The chores are habitual, making you feel almost like a robot as you complete them every day. When the last dish is in the dishwater, you turn to Jungkook, who just came back from taking out the trash. "Jungkook?"

"Yeah, sweetie?"

"Listen, I've been meaning to ask you..." you trail off. Your partner smiles hopefully at you. "Where do you roll my patients off before their bodies are transported? I mean... I guess what I'm asking is, do you get to see Everland? Is there a portal or something that leads there?"

Jungkook sniffles, scrunching his eyebrows in thought. You can tell by the slight crease on his forehead that he's disappointed there's going to be another work-related conversation.

"We're just told to put them in a white sack. Maybe that's the portal you're talking about? I'm not sure where they go, sweetie," he says. "We just do these extra check-ups so we know they're in good condition to transport. Then we set them in another room. I guess someone else does the rest." He pauses. "But I don't think I was supposed to tell you all that. Y/N, you know the details of our assigned careers have to be kept confidential."

You sigh. "Yeah, I know... Still, though. What does it matter? We work in the same career unit. There should be no secrets!"

"I think the Council would have something to say to that," Jungkook says. "I just think you want to see what Everland is like because you've been asking me an awful lot of questions about work," he sulks. "We're partners, Y/N... Can we please act like it? Look at Hoseok next door with his partner. And Namjoon too. They always go on dates, and they're already thinking of signing up for kids from the clinic."

You flinch. Assigned partners, you want to remind Jungkook. But you don't. It's not that you hate Jungkook or despise his presence altogether. It's just that you don't love him. Not as much as he loves you, anyway.

But he's loyal and one of your only friends. And he's not too bad of a company.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," you say, reaching out to place a friendly hand on his. "I just... I've been selfish, I know."

Jungkook takes your hand in his, tugging you into his arms.

"I always feel guilty, you know?" you whisper against his chest. "I make Everland seem like this fairytale place. But I don't even know what it's like."

"It's best to trust what the Council says," Jungkook reassures you. "You're better off trusting them than anyone else, right?"

"You're right."

"It's okay," Jungkook whispers, kissing your forehead before letting you go. "Sooner or later, we'll be transported too. Sometimes in moments that we least expect it."

You hum, detecting the melancholy tinge to his silvery voice. "It's your brother, isn't it? How do you think he's faring in Everland?"

"Junghyun?" Jungkook sighs. "He's probably having the time of his life there... It was just so sudden. I didn't even get to say goodbye to him."

"They leave us in the most mysterious ways," you say. "Too bad we lose contact after their transport. I would've loved to see what it's like there."

"Yeah, me too," Jungkook says. "But I want us to leave for Everland together."

Unlikely, you think. "Me too," you say. "Come on, let's get to bed. I have to stay late tomorrow at work. They're giving me another patient on top of Jimin."

Jungkook groans, his hand searching for yours as the two of you make your way into the bedroom. When he finds your hand, he holds it tightly, almost as if he was afraid you'd fade out of sight at any second. "The Council's overworking you, sweetie."

"Or they just think I'm doing a great job," you say, squeezing his hand. "It's okay. I swear I don't mind. He's a good guy, you know, this Jimin. Deserves to be in Everland. He just needs some emotional boost as they all do. And as for the new patient... I don't know what to expect."

"Well, then," Jungkook says. "Tell this Jimin to say hi to my brother for me when he's there."

"Sure thing."

"Sweetie?"

"Hm?"

"Don't work too hard," Jungkook says. "You need some time to relax."

You giggle. "My career is my relaxation! It's fun to meet these people, to talk to them, you know? Granted, half of them don't understand me, but I dunno... I like the process way more than the procedure itself."

"Yeah, yeah," Jungkook laughs, shaking his head, his hand slipping out of yours. "We should wash up," he says, "before the suppressant makes me drop to the floor snoring."

You laugh along with him, tugging your assigned partner into the bathroom. The nighttime routine in there is as practiced as any other routine in your life. Soon, you and Jungkook are lying in bed, side by side. Just like always.

"Sweetie?" Jungkook murmurs, the suppressant taking a toll on him already. He seems to be barely awake.

"Yeah?"

"Try to get home much before curfew, okay?"

Jungkook had freaked out when the patrollers had found you crossing the streets after curfew. He'd been reminding you about getting home earlier for months now. But you never listen to him. Still: "Of course," you say. "I'm sorry for always making you worry."

When Jungkook doesn't answer, you realize he's already knocked out. You let out a deep sigh, turning over to face the small window in the bedroom. It's dark out tonight, with no moon to light up the bedroom even the slightest bit.

Sometimes, you wonder what it would be like if the suppressant worked on you normally as it did for everyone else.

Out of the thousands of citizens of Tagna, it had to be you to be the victim of immunity to the suppressant.

"Jimin! How are you?" you exclaim, closing the hospital room door behind you as you shake a bag of his favorite chips in your hand. "Look what I got you! I might've been late because of that." You laugh apologetically as Jimin giggles, immobilized on his bed.

"I'm fine, Y/N, thank you. No need to worry." But the man shifts uncomfortably, then lifts the bed covers off of the lower half of his body. "Can you help me up?" He nods towards his missing right leg, giving you a rather frustrated look.

"Yes, of course," you quickly say, taking big steps to help Jimin out of his bed and onto his wheelchair. Though the amputation had been successful—the infection didn't spread to the rest of the body—a missing leg left Jimin often irritated and frustrated. "Where do you want to go today?" you ask him, rubbing his shoulders to comfort him.

The man places a hand on top of yours, looking at you pleadingly. "Outside the hospital...?" he says hopefully.

"Aw, Jimin..." you say, crouching down in front of him to take his hands. "You know we can't do that." He knows, but he asks every day, just in case—as if one day, you'll be waiting for him with a different answer other than no.

"I know," Jimin says, squeezing your hands. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," you tell him. "Do you want your blanket, Jimin? You know, to cover—"

"Yes, please." Nodding, you help the man drape a white cotton blanket over his leg. "I want another look around the hospital before I'm transported."

"Sure!" You adjust Jimin's blanket, securing it so it falls over his missing leg. You and Jimin have a wordless agreement not to talk much about it, and you know how much he likes to have it covered up. Jimin's insecure, embarrassed about a missing limb. Especially when before the amputation, he had been a fit, robust figure, always running around and training. "We'll just roam around the hospital and talk."

Jimin smiles. "That sounds good to me. Let's bring the chips too."

You hand the snack to Jimin, carefully checking the room one last time before rolling the man out into the hospital corridor. It's silent as you wheel Jimin in the direction of the left-wing, where there are full-length windows replacing the usual bland white walls, allowing bright sunlight to flood the corridor. It's the only place that gives the otherwise spotlessly white hospital a golden glow. Jimin likes that spot the best; honestly, so do you.

Once you situate Jimin in front of the windows, making sure he isn't completely in the sun, you sit down next to him. (He doesn't like it when you tower over him.) Jimin looks comfortable in his wheelchair, clutching his now open bag of chips and staring out the window with deep admiration.

"Tell me about Everland, again," he whispers, gazing thoughtfully out of the windows. "Please, Y/N."

The sunlight bounces perfectly off the bridge of Jimin's sloped nose, giving his face of beautiful features a sort of rare radiance.

"Everland?" you hum. "What do you want to hear about it?"

"I don't know... If people like me are welcomed there, I guess," Jimin sighs. His gaze flickers to you. "No one I know and admire knows about my amputation—except you. They won't let me contact my friends or family... They're sending me to paradise early because I'm an embarrassment to Tagna."

"Don't be like that." Sure, you've noticed society's outcasts are usually the ones that are transported—the ones with physical or mental disabilities, or just those older in age. But, of course, that just means that everyone should be transported sooner or later. Or maybe these people are the only people that Everland accepts.

Jimin is going at it as if Everland only accepted those rejected from Tagna. You're not so keen on that idea. The Council works hard to protect every single citizen. That would be impossible.

The seated man inhales sharply. "How can I not be like this, Y/N? I feel so useless here, like this, in a fucking hospital of all places. The only way I can even moderately feel like I'm back in society is here, in front of these damned windows where I can actually see the sunlight. Otherwise, I'm stuck in these white-walled rooms with no one to talk to but you. Then I'm forced to run through these health checkups with doctors that never speak to me, even when I ask them questions! At this point, anything is better than this stupid hospital."

"Oh, Jimin..." you say, immediately taking his hand in yours. You can't bring yourself to tell him 'don't be like that,' again. Pure sorrow is held deep in his brown eyes when he looks at you; your heart aches. "Hey..." you whisper, softly squeezing his warm hand. "Remember that thing I always tell you?"

"What thing?" he huffs. You can tell he's a little bit irritated, and you struggle to keep a straight face.

Placing another comforting hand on his remaining knee, you say, "Remember? For us and—"

"For Everland," Jimin finishes for you. "Oh, that thing," he mumbles. "Of course I remember."

You nod, smiling when Jimin grips your hand tighter. "Have you ever stopped to think about what that meant?"

"No, not really, Y/N." Though he's still frowning, he doesn't look as forlorn anymore.

"Well," you say, "we, as a society, will always miss any patient after their successful transport. I remember everyone I've helped to cross the dimensions and go to Everland, so I'm sure your friends and family unit will always remember you as well. You'll be the man who was worthy of being transported into paradise. Think of it like you're doing it for Tagna, to represent our society in a new land. For us."

"And for Everland?"

"It's nice to say that out of respect, you know?" you smile. "I mean, you'll be staying there for the rest of your life, Jimin. Besides, no one ever said anything about you being an embarrassment, Jimin. You're nothing but a hero, a veteran."

The corners of Jimin's lips turn up just slightly as he looks out the windows once more. "For us and for Everland, huh?"

Though he can't see you, you nod. "Everland is the happiest place on what's left of planet earth," you say, causing Jimin's head to whip toward you. "Yeah," you say. "It's a place even better than our advanced society right here. Everyone is equal in Everland too, but you get many more benefits. The skies are this rich, azure blue and the clouds are so fluffy, they say they emulate the sweetest cotton candy. The people there are veterans like you. I can guarantee you that everyone is respected and well-understood. Every home unit has enormous windows that let the sunlight warm up the buildings. The food there is fresh, nurtured straight out of the soil and hand-picked by the dwellers. It's beautiful there because it's spring, all year long..." you trail off.

Jimin stares at you, lips parted and eyes glossy, no doubt daydreaming about this Utopian place just like you are. "Beautiful..." he mutters under his breath. It's like he wants to ingrain this wonderful scene he had painted of Everland in his head, to recite it to himself every so often before his transport.

You sit back, hand still intertwined in his as you let Jimin lose himself in his reverie. It's several minutes later when Jimin finally jolts from his seat, turning to you with an apologetic look on his face. "I'm sorry," he says. "I zoned out."

"No worries," you tell him. "We all do when we think of Everland."

Jimin hums, squeezing your hand, turning to you with the best of his ability (which was how well his chair would let him). "Do you have a partner, Y/N?"

The rather personal question makes you raise your eyebrows in shock, but you quickly make up for it with a small, stifled laugh. Normally, your patients like it when you tell them fantasy stories or when you listen to them talk about their whole life. They very rarely ask about you.

"Uh, yeah, Jimin," you say. "I have an assigned partner."

"What's he like? When were you assigned to him? Do you love him?"

When you raise another shocked eyebrow, Jimin squirms in his seat, releasing your hand. "Sorry... I-I wasn't trying to be... um, invasive. I'm just... I'm being transported before I get my partner. Having one was one of my dreams since I was little. You know, having my very own family unit to come home to after work..." he trails off. "Please, tell me everything about it."

How can you say no to that?

"Don't worry," you smile warmly. "You can ask all the questions you want—I can't guarantee a good answer, though."

"That's fine, Y/N."

"Well then, hmm..." you say. "Um, his name is Jungkook. I'll start with that. Tall, handsome, ungodly fit... Kind, too." You pause, searching for the look of approval on Jimin's face; he looks like he's in bliss, so you continue. "Sometimes, he acts like my assigned mother, you know, nagging at me to take care of myself and being concerned about everything I do... But, at the end of the day, he's my best friend. He tells me not to overwork myself and he tries to take me on dates when they're due. Then he always makes sure I'm back home before curfew. He knows how I let time fly past me at work," you laugh. "Jungkook's a beautiful soul. I'm really lucky to have been assigned to him. It's been about three years, and I can't say I have any complaints, really."

"Do you love him?"

The question catches you off guard. You look at Jimin, who looks so hopeful, so attached to your assigned relationship—as if it were as precious as his own. With that look on his face, you don't know what kind of monster you would have to be to tear that fantasy apart. Your assigned partner is the last relationship Jimin will hear of, the one that will be embedded in his memories when he is transported. It's your job to take care of Jimin. And it's your job to support him emotionally.

You know the answer to that question. You've known it for a while, and for the longest time, you always thought (or hoped) it would change. It never did.

You're not even completely sure what love is, at this point, though the Council had drilled the definition of it in you since you were a little girl. You're supposed to love your assigned partner, so in a way, you feel like you've failed them.

But you let out a shaky breath, catching Jimin's eyes as you beam. "Yes, I love him."

It's a lie.

Usually, you're given one patient to work with at a time; the Council knows to give you some well-deserved lax time. But never have you gotten two patients. Jimin's transport wasn't scheduled for another two weeks, yet they're taking you to meet a second patient today.

You're not that bothered by the news—not as bothered as Jungkook, anyway. You know he's always wanted to lounge around in bed, watching authorized movies and cooking homemade breakfast together. But you insist that you need to take your assigned career seriously.

He can't argue much after that.

You've said your goodbyes to Jimin earlier that day, had a quick snack and waited. And waited. and waited.

The first meeting with a new patient always makes you feel so jittery. You don't know this person at all—you're to never have any personal connections with them. So you always have to figure out their conditions yourself. It's always one of three things: mentally disabled, physically disabled or older in age. At first glance, it's always easy to tell which the patient is.

The patient is always nervous too, glancing at you anxiously, wondering if you would take good care of them as the Council had promised. There's some pressure to make the best impression. Your white lab coat tends to make your patients uneasy, so one day you 'lost' it in the laundry and never wore it again. A fuzzy sweater or a modest t-shirt with jeans usually does the trick.

You straighten out your t-shirt for the hundredth time, checking to see if it was tucked in your jeans correctly and fixing your hair too. Sometimes, you think you probably feel more nervous to meet your new patient than the patient. After all, you'll have to spend as much as time (or more) with this person as with your assigned partner.

When the door to the hospital room opens, you stand up immediately, ready to greet your patient and assistant, Taehyung, who always introduces you to your new patients. But you're greeted with something you're not quite ready for.

"Don't fucking touch me," a menacing voice snarls. The owner of this voice is a rather lean man with messy blonde hair. He practically slaps Taehyung for holding onto his elbow, and even the always-happy Taehyung looks miserable.

You quickly scan the patient with your eyes. Normally, your discernment is quick, but this time, it's hard. Immediately, you're able to rule out old age. If there was a physical disability, it wasn't obvious. You're leaning towards mental disability, though you also get a feeling that it's really not. You're stumped, but you try not to show it.

Besides, your patient already sounds really irritated.

"Hey, Taehyung," you say, offering your assistant a smile. "Who's our lovely patient?"

The patient dramatically rolls his eyes, aggressively pulling away from Taehyung's grip. "Min Yoongi."

"Yoongi!" you say with a happy smile, though you're very much aware that this Min Yoongi is anything but happy. "Come on into your new room! Nice to meet you. I'm Y/N. I'll be your nurse until your transport in several weeks. You turn to Taehyung, nodding. "Thank you."

"Yeah, no problem. Good luck," Taehyung says before hurrying away.

It's possible that Taehyung's busy and that's the reason behind his sprint away from you and the new patient, but something tells you that it's something else. And that 'good luck' sounded more like a warning than a cheerful goodbye.

Your eyes meet with Yoongi's. They're hard, black and cold. Almost like they can pierce through your soul.

"So, Yoongi," you say, "are you excited about going to Everland?"

It's the best way to start off the first conversation with any patient. They enjoy talking about Everland—and if they don't know much about it, they beg for you to tell. It works every time.

Except not today.

Yoongi scoffs, collapsing on his hospital bed as he turns to face you, cocking his head haughtily. "Why would I be excited?" He sounds like he's accusing you of spreading false lies.

But you don't back down. "Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe excited isn't the right word. I guess I meant you're looking forward to it?"

"No, I'm dreading it. Terrified. Fucking disgusted and filled to the brim with overflowing trepidation."

"W-What?"

"Whatever. Just leave, Y/N. Come back when it's time for me to be 'transported' or whatever the shit the Council calls this."

Never have you dealt with a rude patient. They're all usually very understanding and kind and most of all, respectful. You're taken aback, but you're not one to say no to a challenge.

"Yoongi, do you need someone to talk to?" you ask in your softest voice. "Hey, I'll listen to anything. Really. If you're that 'filled to the brim with overflowing trepidation,' then you can tell me. I'll listen."

"What makes you think I trust you?" It's another challenge, the way he utters it. Yoongi crosses his arms over his chest and raises a daring eyebrow at you.

You swallow your pride, keeping an unfazed, neutral look on your face. "Everything you tell me here, stays in here, Yoongi. You have my word."

"You could be lying through your teeth right now," Yoongi snorts. "Could you be any more artificial? You're giving me a headache, all right? If you're going to be so ersatz with your emotions, I reckon you leave."

Me? Give him a headache?? And not the other way around???

You've had enough.

"I don't think you want me to leave," you say slowly and firmly, crossing your arms and staying rooted to your spot.

"And why would you think that?" Yoongi cocks his head, his bangs falling over his eyes as he does so. He makes no effort to sweep it away. For some reason, that ticks you off even more.

"Loneliness," you say. "You'll get sick of being cramped up and alone in this white-walled room. The only artificial thing here would be the lights—and trust me when I say if you stay here alone, you can say goodbye to natural sunlight until your transport. If you claim that you don't find loneliness even in the tiniest bit of solitude, then I think I might have to ask you to leave for being... what was it again? Ersatz with your emotions."

You haven't left eye contact with the patient.

And you start to become jittery again when complete silence follows after your passive-aggressive speech.

Until: "Damn. Didn't think you had that in you."

"What?"

"I have to give you credit for that," Yoongi shrugs. "Maybe you won't be completely annoying after all. Maybe you'll be bearable."

You let out air through your nose. "Thanks?" You shake your head in disbelief as you sit next to him on his bed.

"You're welcome, I guess."

A small giggle escapes from your lips, then a louder laugh.

Yoongi looks at you as if you sprouted devil horns on your head.

"Sorry—" you manage to say in between giggles—"if the Council saw me being this mean, I'd have to say goodbye to my job."

"You call that being mean?" It's Yoongi who laughs this time. "You're going to have a hell of a time with me, then."

You leave your home unit early for the first time—without Jungkook having to shake you awake—to buy some snacks for your patients. (Though you know Jimin's favorite foods, you end up having to take a wild guess for Yoongi.)

Jimin had made you promise to meet you as early as your schedule allowed it. You don't mind. Hanging out with Jimin is relaxing, especially because he lets you blabber on and on about your personal life. Today, he wants to hear about your assigned career.

"The Council assigned me as a patroller, you know," Jimin says, leaning back proudly in his wheelchair. "I would've been a hell of a good one too... If it weren't for the infection." He sighs, staring at his foot with scrutiny. "It's okay," he shrugs. "What about your career?"

"Hm," you say, looking outside the window where the morning sunshine catches your eye. "Well..." you hum, voice soft and eyes glazed over. "I'm a nurse." Jimin waits for you to continue. "But I have to admit, I didn't really like my assigned career at first. Why be a nurse when you can be a doctor, a surgeon, perhaps?" You give Jimin a small smile. "As a little girl, I always wanted to be in that operating room, you know, operating and saving lives."

"That's honorable, Y/N." Jimin gives you an approving nod, placing his hand on yours to tell you to proceed.

"But I guess the Council thought I'd be a better nurse," you say. "And now, I think they're right. I mean, they always are. Besides, I wouldn't last two seconds in a cold, quiet operation room. I need to talk to people, you know? Take care of them, tell them stories, help them transport. I think I value the presence of people, along with their happiness." You shrug. "I dunno. I do dare say that I'm pretty good at making people happy."

Jimin laughs softly. "There's no other career that would've fit you better." He turns his body fully so that he's facing you. "Y/N, I really don't say this often, but I'm glad you're my nurse. Thank you." Jimin looks deeply into your eyes, something he only does when he's extremely serious. "Hey," he whispers, "I just want you to know that I'm not scared. Everland will be as wonderful as you've always told me. I trust you. And I know I'm in great hands."

He squeezes your interlocked hands for emphasis. "For us and for Everland, yeah?"

"Have you obtained a serious eye infection?"

"N-No," you stutter, wiping your red eyes with the back of your sweater. You quickly set down some snacks on Yoongi's bed and avert your eyes away from him. "I just..."

"Oh," Yoongi says, clapping his hands together. "You've been crying!" he accuses, pointing at your face with a smug smirk. He looks like he could care less, yet he asks, "What happened?"

"It's really nothing," you sniff, sitting down on Yoongi's bed. "They're not sad tears, necessarily."

To your surprise, Yoongi laughs. You look at him with disapproval. "I'm sorry!" he snorts between giggles, "but you wouldn't know 'sadness' if it socked you in the face!" Upon seeing your puzzled expression, he sighs. "Whatever."

Yoongi doesn't push the topic, which is very much like him. You don't mind. It's not like you want to explain crying in front of Jimin, your patient. Jimin has a strange way of making you feel special. And special's a word no one's allowed to be in Tagna—because specialness is the cause of discrimination. But you think specialness makes you feel valuable.

"So," Yoongi starts, tilting his head to look at your curiously, "why are you here?"

This time, you're the one to laugh. "I'm your nurse! I'm supposed to look after you before your transport. You know, talk to you, answer your questions, tell you about Everland."

"Doesn't sound very crucial to me."

Yoongi has a habit of being very, very candid. You tend to mistake his honesty for rudeness, but after a while, you've come to appreciate the truthfulness. He brings out a fun, slightly meaner side of you that nobody else but Yoongi would approve of. You hate to admit it, but you like it.

"Fine then," you say. "What do you suggest we do?"

"I don't know. What do you do with people you know? Not including those in your career unit."

"We..." you trail off, a frown settling on your face. "I don't know any people outside my career unit," you admit. "I mean, unless you count my assigned partner. But then again, I always talk about work with him too." You gasp. "I don't think I have actual friends!"

"Good," he says, which makes you look at him with incredulity. He laughs at your expression, a genuine laugh in which his eyes sparkle with mirth and his lips are tugged into a rather snarky smile. But it's a smile nevertheless. "It's fine, Y/N. 'Cause me too. We can be each other's friends."

"Really? But wouldn't you technically be a career-related friend?"

"But are we going to talk about career-related things?" He gives you a look. "I believe I told you I'm not the least bit interested in Everland. Nor do I care even the tiniest bit how to get there. I surely don't have any inquiries regarding the transport. I'm pretty sure you won't have to worry about being a nurse around me... Though I'll probably appreciate the snacks." Yoongi pauses to rip open a bag of gummy bears. He grins. "My favorite. How'd you guess?"

"I had a hunch." You smile proudly, taking a mental note to buy some more gummy bears for Yoongi in the future. "But wait a minute," you say. "You really want me to be your friend?"

"Definitely not a nurse," Yoongi says. "I can take care of myself, thank you. But you were right. I'd die of boredom if I'm alone. That's where you can step in as a friend." He winks, sorting out the green gummy bears from the other variegated colors and popping one in his mouth. He offers you a red gummy bear.

How'd he guess? You smile, shaking your head as you take his offer. My favorite.

Jimin and Yoongi are polar opposites. If one man is gentle, sensitive and kind, the other is brash, rather presumptuous and most of all, pedantic. It's obvious who is who.

But you're not one to pick favorites. A patient is a patient no matter who they are—at least you try to think so. Your end goal is to make sure you're there for them before they're transported to the all-so-magical Everland. Granted, one acts like your friend and the other, your patient.

Jimin likes to ask you a lot of questions, whether it's an inquiry about Everland or questions about your personal life. He's made you repeat the details of Everland so many times, you're sure he already has everything memorized. But he still asks.

On the other hand, Yoongi doesn't bother to ask questions at all. As a man of his word, he proved from early on that he had no interest whatsoever in Everland or assigned partners or assigned careers or assigned anything. You're starting to wonder if he has any interests at all. In fact, come to think of it, you're not even sure if he's ever left his hospital room.

"Oh, this place reeks," you tease, waving your hand in front of your nose. You toss Yoongi a bag of gummy bears and plop down on the bed next to him. "Do you ever leave the room?"

The man laughs, reaching for the snack. "I don't leave the bed."

You scrunch your nose. "Ew." Yoongi shoves four green gummy bears into his mouth, and you watch with a mixture of disgust and pity. "We need to get you out of here."

"Out of the hospital?" Yoongi asks with a mouthful of gummy bears.

"No, just out of this room," you say. "I mean, you might die from a kidney disease before being transported. Imagine that, the first man in decades to die in Tagna—in this day and age with advanced medicine and technology!"

Yoongi scoffs. "Whatever. Fine, let's get out of here. Not like there's anything better to do outside, though."

"We can get ice cream in the cafeteria," you offer. "And argue about the right way to cut up a sandwich again."

"You monster, you're supposed to cut it in triangles!"

"Yeah, says the one who puts the milk first, then the cereal!"

The bickering continues until you're seated in the hospital cafeteria. By that time, both of you are too tired to carry on with the arguing. So there's a bit of silence as you and Yoongi feast on your ice cream scooped onto large sugar cones. You went for plain vanilla, but Yoongi opted for the most sugary flavor: butterscotch dutch fudge nut with diced marshmallows and a caramel drizzle.

You swear he might get diabetes before his transport if he keeps this up. Maybe you should bring him some healthy snacks next time—kale, avocados, spinach. They're green, just like how he likes his gummy bears, so maybe he'll listen to you and finally have a salutary diet.

But instead of being able to convince Yoongi to start the habit of healthy eating, it all spirals down into another debate.

"It's CAR-amel," you insist.

"CARE-amel," Yoongi retorts, shaking his head. "We've been quarreling for the past hour, Y/N. Aren't you getting tired of it? I've never argued this much in my entire life!"

"But what if that's how this 'friend' thing works?" you say. "Actual friends care so much they disagree on every little detail."

"Then it's very tiring to have friends," Yoongi sighs, taking a depressing lick of the lump of sugar on a cone.

"I agree." A pause. "Did you ever have friends, though?"

Yoongi snorts. "Actually, contrary to popular belief, I did. But that was before I got myself into this mess."

"Mess??"

He shrugs the question off, countering it with another question of his own. "Did you have any friends?"

You tilt your head, but figure it's best to let Yoongi have some space. "Um, yeah. I guess I was pretty well-known in my year. Now I don't really have time for that. Work," you sigh. "But I still enjoy what I do."

"I know you do. You're a good friend, and though I wouldn't know, an amazing nurse," Yoongi grins, shrugging so nonchalantly that you almost miss the complimenting tone of his voice.

You grin back. It had taken you a bit to coax the sweetness out of his cold and collected demeanor, but once revealed, Yoongi could almost parallel Jimin's amenity. "What about you? Did you like what you did before you were chosen to be transported?"

Yoongi's smile disappears in the blink of an eye, a sour frown replacing it. "Not exactly." His stone-cold voice is a sign for you to change the topic, but he continues to speak. "I was good at my career. Liked it at first, too. But I'm a rare mistake, I suppose. Maybe I had some traits within me that the Council didn't catch, or maybe I changed as an adult. The Council deemed my career as a mismatch."

A mismatch... You always thought that was a myth—assigned careers never failed. The Council never made mistakes. You can't even fathom the amount of disappointment that Yoongi probably had felt when realizing his assigned career was a mismatch. "I'm so sorry," you say. "Do you mind if I ask what career unit you were in?"

Yoongi hesitates for so long, you start to think you've crossed the line. But then: "Unit 38. I was in unit 38." He clears his throat and watches carefully for your reaction.

Your eyes widen and your mouth opens, shuts, then opens again. "38?? That's my unit!" you say. "How come I've never seen you before?"

He crosses his legs, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "I suppose I was in the more secluded area of the hospital."

Though you want him to elaborate, Yoongi's uneasy fidgeting sets you off. You're here to make him feel safe, comfortable. As much as you're insanely curious now that Yoongi's avoiding the subject, you shrug. "Oh, that's interesting... Wanna talk about something else?"

When Yoongi shoots you a grateful look, you actually feel glad for changing the topic. It was the right thing to do. As to sate your curiosity...

I'll just ask Jungkook about him later.

"Hey, Jungkook?" you whisper, testing the waters, trying to tell if the suppressant already brought your assigned partner to a deep slumber. You turn around on the bed to face him, and you're glad when he turns around as well.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Do you know anyone of the name Min Yoongi?" you ask hopefully.

Jungkook crinkles his brows in thought. "Min Yoongi?" he mutters to himself. "Min Yoongi..." He gives you an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, the name doesn't ring a bell."

"It's fine," you sigh, lying fully on your back now and staring up at the dark ceiling. "I just think it's strange the Council would assign me a patient who worked in the same unit as me."

"Really?" Jungkook murmurs. "Unit 38? Why don't we know him?" he asks, tiredness laced into his tone. "Are you sure you heard him right, sweetie?"

"I'm sure," you say. "He did say he worked in the more secluded part of the hospital... And I thought we were in the most secluded area."

Jungkook laughs softly, moving to place his hand on top of yours. "Why don't you just ask him about the details?"

"I didn't want to push him into explaining something he's uncomfortable with," you say. "I'm sorry... I'm keeping you up with all of this, aren't I? You're tired. It's past curfew." You glance over at the digital clock you keep beside the bed. The red, glowing light flashes 2245 hours. It's pretty late.

"It's okay," Jungkook says. "You don't have to be sorry, Y/N," he laughs, but it comes out dry and forced. You can practically feel the worried look on his face. "You took the suppressant today, right?"

"Never gone a day without one," you reply. "You know they don't work on me as well as they work on others..."

"Sweetie, you should tell the Council. I don't want you to get in trouble for acting out of line," Jungkook sighs but it morphs into a wide yawn. "See?" he murmurs sleepily. "Mine works fine."

You stay silent, watching blankly as your assigned partner's eyes flutter shut. Soon, his breathing becomes even, his chest rising and falling steadily. He's asleep, just like that.

The suppressant does a number of things—or, at least, it's supposed to. The Council keeps the full effects of it private, and the only citizens who are aware of the details are the specialists who designed it. It's uniquely engineered to help the average citizen fall asleep an hour after curfew only to wake him up at 0700 hours every morning. Except on Sundays, it's 0800. Every citizen must take one suppressant—a small, white, tasteless pill—every day before he leaves his home unit at precisely 0845 to get to his career or school by 0900 hours.

Untimeliness is definitely not tolerated.

Which is a proven hassle for you. The suppressant doesn't affect you in the same way it does others. You're always waking up and sleeping later than others. Back when you were in school, you'd always be late for your classes. The Council generously took that into account before they assigned your career, though—but not before they scolded you for being tardy to the career ceremony.

Compared to other careers, nurses have a more lenient call time. It works out in your favor because if it weren't for Jungkook, you'd show up to work three hours late daily.

The clock flashes an angry 2300, but you're still not tired.

At least tomorrow is Sunday. Usually, it's the day off for every citizen in Tagna. Jungkook probably wants you to spend the day with him...

But it won't hurt to visit the hospital. Just for a few hours. To meet your new friend. Jungkook won't mind, right?

You smile to yourself. The thought makes you so excited, you aren't able to sleep until 0300.

It's routinely to visit Jimin before Yoongi.

Jimin is becoming increasingly nervous as the days of his departure to Everland are decreasing. He doesn't talk too often when you visit, but you know he finds your presence soothing.

But today, it's eerily silent.

"You okay?" you whisper.

He nods but offers you no words.

"You're worried, Jimin. Trust me, it'll calm your nerves to talk to me. What's got you anxious?"

He looks down at his foot, avoiding eye contact. You let him stall as he collects his thoughts. Then, in the smallest voice: "I... I don't like injections," he squeaks.

"Hey, hey, it doesn't hurt one bit," you say, wrapping a comforting arm around him. "I would know, Jimin. Trust me."

"I don't know," he sighs, fidgeting his hands. "The needle just—" he chokes over his words, shaking his head in shame. "The last time I got an injection, they took away my leg. I'm scared, Y/N. What if I get to Everland without my good leg too? What if they take away all of my limbs?"

Once in a while, you get a patient who's slightly nervous about the injection, but never have you dealt with something as serious as this. "Jimin... The transport isn't a surgery," you say softly. "It puts you to a peaceful sleep so you can be transported safely. It won't hurt one bit. And you definitely won't lose any limbs. You're in safe hands."

Jimin nods, but he looks fragile, back hunched and eyes shaking. It's hard for you to see him in this state. You wish you can do more for him—more than telling him tales of Everland and bringing him snacks and giving him intangible support.

You want to show him Everland.

But how can you? You don't even know where it is.

"You look like you ate dog shit."

You've been waiting for this moment the whole day—you missed the grouchy man and his candid words.

"Hello to you too," you say, wearily plopping down on Yoongi's bed as he shifts to make space.

"Where's your chipper smile today, Y/N?" Yoongi says. If you didn't know any better, you'd think he's worried about you. But he covers it up well with a: "Your frown is very hideous, by the way."

"Thank you."

"No, I mean, I meant to ask, what happened? You look completely miserable."

"It's confidential," you sigh. "You know, about my other patient..."

"What are the fucktards going to do about it when you tell me?" Yoongi snorts. At your appalled face he clarifies, "By fucktards, I mean the members of the Council."

"Yoongi!"

"It's not like they're going to find out," Yoongi shrugs. "Is this other patient giving you a hard time?"

"They could take away my job," you protest.

"Yeah, only if they find out."

"That's true..."

"So?" Yoongi says. "Are you going to elaborate?"

You pretend to think. "Okay, maybe..." You nod. "Yeah, okay. But I have nothing against Jimin, you know, the patient. He's an absolute sweetheart," you say. "Which is the whole problem. He has such big hopes for Everland. And I keep feeding him all of this paradisiacal information, but it's not enough! I want to help him, I want to tell him what Everland's really like, but how can I? How can I speak about something so highly when I've only lived through it vicariously? Oh god, I tell him things he wants to hear, but technically, I'm lying to his face." You pause for breath. "I'm a liar! But he listens to me! He trusts me! I can't bear the thought of him coming face to face with Everland and realizing it's nothing like what I told him it would be! He'd be broken!"

You can't lie, it feels good to let out everything that had stacked up over the past several days.

"Everland is wonderful. I don't want to doubt that. But what if it's not wonderful enough for Jimin? He's different from my other patients, you know? He needs so much more reassuring and love and care... Sometimes I don't think I can give him the best. Should I resign? I can't keep doing this to him. I'll practically die of guilt! Imagine that—in our day and time—a citizen passing away from something incurable! Bullshit!"

"It is bullshit," Yoongi agrees with you right away. "But I think it'll be fine, Y/N. You don't need to resign. And you definitely don't have to worry. You really don't have to." He stares at the floor with a frown etched deeply on his face. "It'll be fine."

"Really?"

The man nods slowly but surely. You can tell he's choosing his next words wisely, which is something he normally doesn't do. Yoongi is a man of rapid-fire and quick reactions. He's prone to blurt out whatever's on his mind. This is the first time you see him be so attuned to your emotions. Maybe he's trying to think of words that'll help you calm down.

"Everland will be unimaginably peaceful," he says, finally looking at you. His dark eyes show no flicker nor hint of playful teasing. He's serious. "Jimin will like it there."

Something about the way he says it makes you believe him.

Mondays are days when you always end up behind schedule. Your body likes to throw away its natural alarm clock out the window Sunday night, so you tend to accidentally sleep in the next day.

Jungkook usually tries to wake you up for work, but half of the time, you don't budge, so he leaves a kiss on your cheek and leaves for his job. The sequence is always vague in your memories.

Curse your immunity to the suppressant.

It's really no surprise when you show up to your job an hour late. You might've also made a little stop to the convenience store for some snacks. Of course, not for you, but for your patients.

Jimin's already waiting for you patiently on his bed. He thankfully doesn't ask any questions when you walk in a bit breathlessly, handing him a bag of his favorite chips.

You plop down on his bed, wiping away the beads of sweat that had accumulated on your forehead. "I'm so sorry, Jimin," you wheeze. "You must've been up for hours. I apologize for making you wait."

Jimin giggles, shaking his head. "What are you talking about, Y/N? I woke up a few minutes ago. Around 1005 hours? You're right on time!"

If he's lying to make you feel better, he's doing a good job at it.

"I don't get a daily suppressant anymore," Jimin confesses. "I'm awake when everyone's asleep and sometimes, I'm asleep when everyone is awake. Sometimes I can't sleep." He sighs, fingers wrapping around the chip bag. "That never used to happen when I took the suppressant."

He sounds lonely. As if the whole world was excluding him from vibrant, festive affairs.

You're supposed to be his solace, but you can't help but say, "Why don't they give you the suppressant?"

"I've asked," Jimin says. "But of course they don't answer. Just some grunts and mumbles that I can barely comprehend."

"That's not very nice of them," you say. "How about this? I promise I'll visit you more often if you're lonely. And to make you feel better, how about I talk about Everland again?"

Jimin nods hopefully, his eyes lighting. You want the best for him, but sometimes, there's not much you can offer him—except your words.

Yoongi is different. He doesn't want your buttered up, sugar-coated words. He doesn't live behind the curtain of fantasy. He lives in reality. Maybe even a bit more than you do.

"The suppressant tends to mess up the injection. Makes the process longer," Yoongi says casually. He rips open the bag of gummy bears. "Which is exactly why they're not given to patients. Why do you ask?"

"No, it's just..." How does he know that? "Jimin wants to take it again."

"Why would he?" Yoongi scoffs. "I always hated waking up early. Now I can sleep through the whole day and night."

"He's lonely."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. He was well-known before he was moved to the hospital. He misses the social life, I think."

Yoongi doesn't answer for a long time after that. When you finally look over at him, you find him staring into his hands with a conflicted look on his face.

"You okay?" you ask, reaching out and putting a hand on his by habit.

The contact makes Yoongi flinch, but he nods. "I'm always okay, Y/N. Why bothering asking?" He grins. His hand feels warm under yours and you make a move to hold it. But he jerks away. "Anyways, you should be going now, right? Time to get my beauty sleep, you know."

You're shocked, leaving his room feeling utterly rejected.

He'd never even told you goodbye.

If the Council finds out you're pulling a disobedient stunt like this, they might just shove you in the jailhouse for eternity. Then you'll be stripped from your career, home unit and assigned partner.

All your life, though, you've been known as the obedient one. If the Council told you to end your service as a nurse by jumping off a bridge, you'd do it.

But sometimes, you suppose you need to take drastic measures.

Your heart thumps loudly in your chest and your palms feel irritatingly clammy in your jacket pocket where a ziplock bag stays stowed away from sight. Every step towards the hospital fills you with dread—it's another step you've survived without having a Council member catch you in the act.

Maybe this is a bad idea. What if they can check your vitals? That would give away the fact that you had neglected to take your suppressant this morning. The white pill sits snugly in the ziplock bag in your jacket pocket.

The plan is simple. You will walk into the hospital like nothing is wrong. You will walk straight into Jimin's room and hand him the suppressant. He will take the pill. It can't be that hard.

Both of you had developed this plan over the course of a week. It would've taken less time to execute it too if you hadn't chickened out three days in a row.

It mostly terrified you that once started, this little illicit project would last until Jimin's transport. It freaked you out even more that the whole thing was a secret between you and Jimin.

You can't credit this idea to yourself, but it wasn't exactly Jimin's either. Both of you had hinted at it, and in the end, it had been officially addressed. So, you can't blame anyone if it fails drastically.

The suppressant has been around for decades. No one in Tagna has lived without taking them for a very, very long time. The Council likes to hint that before the suppressant entered the human body system, humans were fickle, sexual and undeserving beings. You don't think you'll revert back to that, per se.

But you're wary of the possible side effects.

You always told yourself you'd never show favoritism among your patients. But here you are. Sacrificing your suppressant for Jimin. In your defense, he's something else. Someone that will forever be ingrained in your memories. He's the only person who deserves more than what Everland has to offer. Because Everland surely doesn't restore back missing limbs. And that's what Jimin deserves.

Come to think of it, there's a crazy synergy between you and your patients for some reason. Even Yoongi... He understands you in a way no one else has before. Talking to him feels natural, effortlessly easy and fun, too. Maybe it's because he had worked in your career unit—as the Council says, compatibility rates skyrockets amongst those in the same career unit. Or maybe, just maybe, he should've been your assigned partner. Maybe you're a mismatch with Jungkook.

And judging by the way you feel around your assigned partner, you think it might be true. Doesn't easy communication and having fun around someone mean you love them? Isn't that what love is? Isn't that what defines a deep attraction?

But then again, the last time you'd tried to hold Yoongi's hand—which hadn't been a romantic gesture at all—he had tugged away. Ever since that incident, you've been refraining yourself from lightly touching his shoulder or reassuringly holding his hand. Yet if Yoongi had felt awkward from that encounter, he didn't show it.

Now it's been five days since you've stopped taking your suppressant. Ever since the third day, you haven't felt guilty about it anymore. It almost feels natural not to take the pill at this point.

Jimin's been noticeably happier these days as a result. He has two days before his transport, but he's showing no symptoms of intense nervousness. The suppressant seems to be doing wonders for his condition.

That finally puts you at peace.

And regarding the little warning that Yoongi had given you? The one about how taking the suppressant would make Jimin's transport take longer? Jimin didn't mind.

He told you he'd rather be happy, that he didn't mind the wait. It was all it took for you to authorize the plan.

And now look where things are. It's going great.

This is peculiar.

You have no idea when it started, or how it started, or why it started, but you've been noticing the smallest details about Yoongi. The way he eats, the manner in which he talks, the slightly sarcastic tone to his voice when he argues with you... You may not have noticed them before, but you see them now. And it's endearing.

He's endearing.

Every time he smiles at you, your heart beats a little faster and you feel the heat rushing through your face. You can't quite say it's a good feeling per se, but you know it's special. When his hair falls over his eyes, you always have the urge to reach out and fix it for him. You can't even get him out of your head.

You've never experienced anything like this before. You can't exactly say you hate it, but you're not sure if you like it either.

"Hey, Yoongs?" you whisper. Yoongi glances up from reading his latest book you provided him. It's a cheesy romance story and Yoongi openly made a ten-minute rant on why he hates romance, but you just think he's in denial that a little romance is actually really addicting.

"Hm?" he hums.

You're silent, admiring his face before the words tumble out of your mouth. "Did you ever have an assigned partner?"

Yoongi raises his eyebrows. "Oh?" He smirks. "Why are you interested?"

You flush bright pink. "Why can't I just ask a question without having to deal with a deflected inquiry?"

"Because I like being difficult."

"Clearly."

"But to answer your rather invasive question, yes, I had an assigned partner," Yoongi says. "But it was a mismatch. Lovely."

You gape at him. "The Council mismatched your partner and career??"

"Technically, they mismatched my home unit too," Yoongi scoffs. "They failed me, you know. Don't trust those fucktards."

"Maybe you changed drastically during your transition to adulthood?" you reason. "The Council just doesn't make mistakes!"

Yoongi laughs out loud. "Oh, they make a lot of mistakes. Trust me."

Trust me. It's a lot coming from someone you've known for less than a month. You grew up with the Council supporting you, watching you grow, nurturing you and treating you like you were their own daughter. You can't just throw away your trust in the Council because someone you're fond of says so.

"Mistakes? What other errors could there possibly be?" you say doubtfully.

"They should've made their system foolproof," Yoongi laughs. "They should've put a chip in everyone's arm to check their vitals. Now there's no way of finding out who's not taking their suppressant."

You freeze.

Did he know??

"You mean there's barely a difference in action between those who take the suppressant and those who don't?" you ask.

"No, there are a few differences," Yoongi shrugs. "Only a suppressant developer would know, though. Say, Y/N," he smiles, shutting his book and showing you the cover. "Do you know what love is?"

"Love?" you say, raising your eyebrows. "What do you mean? Of course I know."

"You mean you trust the definition of love that the Council gave you."

"Yes? Why wouldn't I? Love. Noun or verb. A deep attraction. Or to feel a romantic connection with someone." The definition slips off your lips easily after years and years of repeating in your head and out loud.

"And," Yoongi drags on, "how do you know you feel a deep attraction to or a romantic connection with someone?"

"If you communicate naturally together? And uh, have fun together?" you say, but it sounds more like a question than a sure statement. You sigh, "Maybe I don't know what love is."

It feels horrible admitting it out loud.

"Maybe because I don't know what it is, I can't seem to love my assigned partner," you say. "That makes sense, right?"

Yoongi laughs. "Love isn't something anyone can control. That includes the Council." He laughs again, casually tossing his book across the room. You gasp when it lands in the trash can. "Every single fucking 'romance' book here is fake—ersatz, if you will."

"What the hell do you mean?" you say, frowning as you try to stand up to retrieve the book.

But Yoongi grabs your arm and you freeze once more. You turn your face the other way as your cheeks start to feel warm.

"Love is something you find for yourself," he says. "Arranged partnerships, forced partnerships, assigned partnerships—whatever the books say—it's not supposed to work. You're supposed to feel something when you're in love. You're supposed to feel bothered. And sometimes, you'll feel a little too warm for your liking. Your stomach will feel weird. Kinda like there are butterflies flying about inside it. You're supposed to care for the person you love, be their friend, their listener. Sometimes, you'll feel like you want to touch them—sexual attraction. You love them so much, you want to know every inch of them—physically and mentally..." Yoongi trails off. "Of course, the suppressant suppresses all of those feelings."

"Oh." It's the only thing you can manage to mutter. How can you say anything else when Yoongi just described almost everything you felt about him?

It explains so much too.

Why so suddenly you'd been feeling so heated around Yoongi. It's most likely you loved him before you stopped taking the suppressant. But it was only revealed after.

"Oh?" Yoongi says.

"I-I don't know," you say, flustered. "All my life... All my life I thought I was supposed to love my assigned partner. But I don't now... And I... I think I love someone else."

Yoongi smiles, cocking his head so that a bit of his bangs fall over his eyes. "Are you sure?"

You mirror his smile. "Yeah," you murmur, taking a deep breath before using all of your willpower to lean in and sweep Yoongi's bangs off to the side. "I'm sure."

"Good," Yoongi says. "So, do tell. Why have you stopped taking the suppressant?"

He's extremely close to you. So much so, when he speaks, you can feel the warmth of his breath on your cheeks. You barely have the capacity to be surprised.

"I... um, I thought I was immune to it," you answer back in a hushed whisper. "So I didn't think it would change anything if I uh, stopped taking it," you lie. "But it was suppressing me and I didn't even know it."

"Still, you feel it now, right?" Yoongi says. "The butterflies in your stomach?"

Butterflies. What a weird way to describe the fluttering sensation rising up your middle to your chest. But you like it.

"Right now?" you say, raising an eyebrow.

Yoongi grins. "I don't know why, but we're attracted to each other, Y/N. Love has a strange way of connecting the people most far away."

"Wait, Yoongi—"

"Blushed cheeks, shy glances, playful touching... Y/N, I think I found out you love me before you did," Yoongi laughs, lying back on the bed triumphantly. "And then when I thought about it, I supposed you weren't too bad. That's when you started to plague my mind—in kind of a good way, too. It wasn't long until I realized I loved you back." Yoongi glances your way. "Am I going too fast? Do you need time to understand?"

"Um, yes!" you say. "Are you proposing that we love each other? But in an unconventional way? A way that the Council doesn't approve of?"

"The Council isn't the law, you know."

"You're right. They're higher than the law."

Yoongi snorts. "They tell you they are," he says. "I like to think that they're control freaks. It'll be fine. I get to escape to Everland or whatever the shit they call 'paradise' anyway."

"I don't even know what to say!"

"Yeah, me neither."

"What am I supposed to do? Believe you? Challenge the Council questions? Start taking the suppressant again?"

"Do whatever you want," Yoongi smiles. "That's how I ended up getting chosen to go to Everland."

"What do you mean?"

Yoongi suddenly leans in, making your breath hitch and the butterflies in your stomach spread their wings in rapid succession. A rippling motion undertakes your inner stomach. Instinctively, you reach out to the man in front of you, softly wrapping your hand around his wrist. He smiles, tugging you close—so close that your noses are almost touching.

"You'll find out if you want," Yoongi whispers. You can feel his warm breath on your lips. The sensation is new, foreign, but the intimacy pulls you in.

His lips finally meet yours in a quick, fleeting kiss so soft that if your whole face wasn't burning, you would've convinced yourself it hadn't happened. Yoongi leans away, looking confident in himself as he glances at you through the bangs that had fallen over his eyes again.

Your heart beats dangerously fast in your chest when your eyes meet his, goosebumps dotting your skin and your lips feeling unusually tingly.

"Do you believe me now?" Yoongi asks.

It's a hard question disguised with easy words. You find yourself struggling to answer, cheeks tinging pink as you look down at your feet.

Of course you want to believe Yoongi. But you can't throw away your belief in the Council and that was that.

Yoongi senses your hesitation and breaks the silence. "Hey."

"Yeah?"

"How about this," he says. "Why don't you go back home to that mismatched assigned partner of yours and see for yourself?"

You hum. Maybe that is a good idea.

You suppose you'll have to see for yourself.

"Jungkook?" you whisper.

"Yes?" he answers in a similar, quiet tone. He grabs your hand from under the bed covers, drawing soft circles on the back of your hand with his thumb. "What do you want to ask this time?" There's a small, teasing lilt to his voice that almost makes you feel bad for planning on dropping such a difficult question on him. But you persist.

"Why do you love me?"

Jungkook momentarily pauses. "We're partners! Of course I love you!"

"No, no," you sigh, shaking your head. "But why. If we weren't assigned partners, would you still love me?"

There's a sudden shift in the covers as Jungkook turns to his side to face you. Judging by the frown etched on his face, he isn't a big fan of your question.

"The Council picked us to be partners, sweetie," he says. "I love you because we have easy communication and we have fun together."

"Is that all love is to you?"

"Do you want me to go ahead and define it, sweetie?" Jungkook asks. "I'm getting worried, Y/N. Why the sudden questions about love?"

"I-I'm sorry..." you say. "But just... don't you feel something? Love makes you feel something."

"Feel?" Jungkook shakes his head. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't you constantly think of me throughout your day? Don't you feel the butterflies in your stomach? Don't you start blushing if I ever say something nice to you? Don't you want to touch me?"

Jungkook's frown deepens. "Why would I have butterflies in my stomach?" he says. "I don't think that would be healthy at all, sweetie. And I'm already touching you, see?" He holds up your intertwined hands.

He doesn't understand.

"Never mind..." you sigh, pulling your hand away from his. "I'll stop bothering you."

"No, explain, sweetie," Jungkook says. "You're not bothering me. I promise."

He will never understand. Not like Yoongi does, anyway. You stay silent, wishing that the suppressant will put Jungkook to sleep. It's better for people like him to stay ignorant.

But just as you thought the long silence indicated that Jungkook was asleep:

"Well, do you love me?" He sounds hopeful, but also so sure you're going to give him the answer he wants.

The question catches you off guard. You desperately want to say yes—to preserve a partnership and prevent Jungkook from pain and sorrow. But maybe it's better for you to tell him the truth. You can't continue what you have with Yoongi when you have an assigned partner. It pains you to say but—

"I don't love you."

"W-What?"

"We're a mismatch, Jungkook. Let's go to the Council tomorrow and file a split."

This is possibly the worst day to proceed with the procedure.

Things have been hectic with the Council pulling you out of your home unit to separate you and Jungkook. Things have been awkward. Jungkook probably doesn't want to speak to you ever again. He's convinced that you broke his heart.

You're convinced that he never truly loved you to begin with.

Yoongi helps you explore a new kind of relationship. The one that sets fire to your insides and seals it with searing kisses. The one that's pretty distracting for your other daily activities.

Jimin sits patiently on the hospital bed with a blanket draped over his missing leg. "I'm excited, Y/N," he says. "Just think! In a few hours, I'll be there! In Everland..."

You nod, silently pulling on your latex gloves.

"I'm so happy, Y/N," Jimin says. "I've never been this happy in my whole life."

"You'll be happier in Everland," you reply, smiling. "You deserve it, Jimin."

"It's all thanks to you," he says. He suddenly sits up, looking at you solemnly. "But I'll miss you, you know that?"

"Oh, Jimin... I'll miss you too."

"Thank you," he says. "Really. For everything."

He's talking about the little suppressant plan. "No, thank you," you say. Jimin was the catalyst to you finally coming to your feelings, after all. "I wish you a safe transport."

When your assistant rolls in the familiar cart with your needed supplies, you can hear Jimin take a deep breath. He must've seen the syringe.

"It won't hurt," you promise, walking over to the cart and holding the syringe carefully. The needle glints in the air.

Jimin gulps. "F-For us and for Everland, right?"

"Right. Now, lie down, please," you say in your most soothing voice. "This is going to put you to sleep. Your mind will start to travel between dimensions to eventually reach Everland. If you want, you can close your eyes too."

You lean in to whisper in his ear, "The process might take longer... as you may know, but the delay won't be hours long, I hope."

Jimin nods. His eyes flutter close and you can tell he's trying to relax his body.

"That's it," you say. "Relax..."

You let Jimin take a few deep breaths. Then you hold out his arm. "Clench your fist for me, please."

Jimin does as you say. Once you can spot a vein on the upper forearm, you tell Jimin the needle will go in. He nods and does not respond, squeezing his eyes shut. Thankfully, his body stays relaxed as you begin to slowly push down on the plunger. You're almost done when Jimin starts to whimper.

He must be scared.

"Just a few more seconds, Jimin," you say. "You'll be fine..."

But his whimpering doesn't cease even after the needle is out of him. You wipe away excess blood with an alcohol swab quickly, pressing a clean cotton ball on his skin and using medical tape to secure it.

Jimin's still squeezing his eyes shut and you notice sweat accumulating on his forehead.

"Jimin?" you say. "It's over, Jimin. Are you okay?"

"I-It h-hurts," he whimpers. "P-Please, make it stop."

"Hurts?" you say. It's not supposed to hurt. No one ever said it hurt after. You don't want to panic; not when your patient is close to a panic attack.

"Please, Y/N," Jimin groans. His body starts to shake and his eyes open in the process. "I-It's hard to b-breathe—"

Your darkest nightmare unfolds before your eyes.

"He's hyperventilating!" you yell, no doubt frightening your assistants. "Jimin, do you hear me? Purse your lips, take a deep breath through your nose and let it out slowly through your lips, okay?? Do you hear me? Jimin??"

Jimin's leg jerks, nearly kicking you. His whole body begins to twitch; you watch in horror as foam starts to gather in his mouth. "Fuck, he's having a seizure! Get me a cushion!"

"Jimin, hang on!"

You turn his head to the side, guarding the edges of the hospital bed so he doesn't fall off. When your assistant hands you a cushion, you carefully place it under his head. "Oh, Jimin..."

All sorts of bad thoughts fly past you. What if he can't get to Everland because he took the suppressant? What if he will never find happiness again? What will happen when the Council finds out? Will they declare my career as a mismatch too?

Right now, all you can do is wait the seizure out. If he's unconscious afterward, it'll be one of two things: he's somehow transporting himself to Everland or he's in need of urgent care.

It's all your fault, it seems. If you hadn't agreed to such a fickle plan, you would never be in this state of agony. A minute flies by and Jimin falls asleep, limp and sweaty. His face is red and there's a puddle of spit with a mixture of vomit by his lips. You have to look away.

I'm so sorry, Jimin.

A new batch of assistants burst through the door and they start to roll the hospital bed away.

"Wait, where is he going?"

They don't answer you. Apparently, they're not your assistants.

"Is he going to Everland??" you try again.

They're silent.

"Is Jimin okay?"

One of them turns around to look at you. Her eyes are cold but she forges a small smile on her thin lips. "He is okay. The transport was successful. The Council has permitted you to go home early."

There is a relief that floods through you. But it feels cold.

You didn't even get to say your proper goodbyes to Jimin. And now he's off to Everland, but only after leaving Tagna feeling intense pain and undergoing great suffering. The last memory you have of him is him unconscious, legless and distressed.

I don't want to go home.

There is no one waiting for you there, now. So you walk solemnly down the unsettlingly white hospital hallway and knock on the door of a familiar room.

"Come in," says an all too familiar voice.

You already feel comforted.

You tell Yoongi everything that happened in Jimin's procedure. His hyperventilating, his seizure and then his successful transport. Yoongi listens quietly to your story but you can tell his mind is someplace else.

When you finish talking, he continues to stare at you, offering no comments or reactions to Jimin's hectic transport. He looks a lot like he's thinking with his brows slightly furrowed and his lips parted.

"Yoongi?"

"Hm?"

"What are you thinking about?"

"Do you want me to be brutally honest?" he asks. You nod, though you're a bit wary of his candid thoughts. "Don't get mad," he warns you. "But I pity you."

You frown. "Pity me?"

"Yes. You, your job, your... life."

"Just because I had a mismatched assigned partner doesn't signal the end of the world," you say. "You don't have to pity me, Yoongi."

"Jimin's gone, Y/N," he replies without skipping a beat. "I do pity you. Jungkook's gone because you never loved him. And I'll be gone too. What are you going to do?"

"This is my job," you say. "I guess we can't all have perfect assigned partners and careers and home units and everything. Besides, Jimin's in a great place now. And you will be too. I'm just helping you get there."

Yoongi's silent. He stares at his hands then he stares back up at you. Then, he sighs.

"Do you want to know why I'm here?"

You frown. "What do you mean?"

"You've been wondering, right? Why I'm not physically nor mentally disabled. Why I'm not an elderly man, either. I'm a strange case, aren't I? You weren't supposed to get another patient for a while longer, but you ended up having to take care of me and Jimin. Don't you want to know why?"

"I mean, of course I do. It's just very sudden that you're—"

"I'm a criminal."

Your heart drops in your chest.

"You're a what?"

"A criminal."

"W-What...? Why aren't you in a jailhouse? A-Are you sure you're a criminal? Why would they allow you to go to Everland?"

Yoongi nods, laughing bitterly. "It's all a part of the Council's masterplan."

"What the hell are you saying?"

"The Council likes order. They like normal. They can't accept people who are different. They can't possibly house the citizens who would disobey their orders," Yoongi says. "So they ship the different ones off to Everland."

"Because Everland accepts and loves everyone for who they are!"

"No, so they won't be a disgrace to Tagna," Yoongi snorts. "My brother had Aspergers," he continues. "But they didn't find out until way later. He liked the routinely ways of the Council and tried to conform. But he was still different. Social interactions were hard for him—so hard that the Council found out that he's different. The next thing you know, he's shipped off to the hospital so they could 'treat' him and I never saw him again."

"They took him to Everland," you say.

"I know they did. I didn't find out until later," Yoongi says. "Because I invented the drug."

"What??"

"The syringe you use for every patient, right? I invented the serum inside it."

"H-How?"

"What do you mean, how?" Yoongi says. "It made it easier for the Council. Less chaos."

It makes sense. When you were training to be a nurse, everything had been a pilot-run because the transport system had been revamped.

"I didn't think they would use the drug that way..." Yoongi says. "I thought they'd use it on the criminals in the jailhouse..."

"Why would they give that to the criminals in the jailhouse??"

"You and I, Y/N..." Yoongi trails off. He looks into your eyes, almost as if he was pleading you to believe him. "We're murderers."

You stand up from his bed. "What did you say?"

When Yoongi stands up and takes a step towards you, you step backward, nearly stumbling over doing so. "Listen to me very carefully, Y/N," he pleads. "That drug... it stops your vitals."

"No! It puts you to sleep! Then your mind starts to travel across dimensions!"

"Don't you understand?" Yoongi says. He grabs your arm. "Everland is death."

You fall to the floor.

"They burn the bodies in the basement of the hospital," he continues. "You thought Tagna was such an advanced society there was no such thing as death?" He laughs scornfully. "Y/N, the Council believes Tagna is so advanced, it's permitted to kill their own citizens to preserve equality and likeness. And when the neighboring societies attack, they'll release the gas-version of the drug and kill everyone—even the citizens of Tagna if they have to."

"That can't be true..." you whisper. "Yoongi, I can't do this." You bury your face in your hands. "Neighboring societies? A cemetery under the hospital? I've been living under a rock."

"The only society we know the name of is Atna. They're curating a selection of their best and most intelligent citizens to destroy us," Yoongi says. "That's all I know. I helped design the gas serum that would make them drop dead like flies. Until I threatened to quit and release the gas in the Council's chambers."

"You quit because you knew they killed your brother."

"Exactly that," Yoongi says. "See, it isn't so hard to understand. And now I'm here, a threat to society, apparently. After everything I've done for them, too. Even fixed up the suppressant by request..." He pauses, watching you tremble on the floor. He kneels down next to you, patting your back. "Hey... do you believe me?"

"I killed him..." you breathe shakily. "I killed Jimin... And I made it worse by letting him take the suppressant... A-And it reacted badly with the serum... I killed seventy-eight people... Oh, fuck! And I have to kill you!" A broken sob leaves your lips as your huddle into a ball. "You're right, Yoongi. I'm a murderer..."

"You were forced to do it. And you didn't know," Yoongi soothes. "The Council are a bunch of vile fucktards, Y/N. They're the real murderers. Not us."

"What am I going to do?" you sob. "I can't continue on, Yoongi. I want to resign."

"If you resign, they'll kill you too."

"Maybe death... maybe Everland will be better than this," you whisper. "What's the point anymore, Yoongi? When I'm old, they're gonna kill me too."

"Let them. There's no use fighting it. Either way, you'll end up dead. Like me."

"I can help the other citizens of Tagna," you say, wiping away your tears and gritting your teeth. "I can free them from the Council's restraints. Maybe we can leave Tagna altogether and see if there are other societies to live in. You can tell me where they keep the gas! That could be really helpful."

"No, Y/N," Yoongi firmly says. "Let the others live in bliss."

"What?? Why?"

"I don't want to be a hero. Think about how complicated things will be if you were to go against the Council," Yoongi says. "It's not worth it because you'll lose."

"So you're going to let me kill you?"

"Everland is better than Tagna, don't you agree?"

There he goes again, answering your question with another one of his.

"You've accepted your fate."

"I have. You should accept yours too."

"I have no fate," you scoff. "I'm someone the Council chose to become a licensed murderer."

"Your service helps those poor people escape their suffering."

"Yeah, without their permission."

"You shouldn't have declared your assigned partner as a mismatch to the Council," Yoongi sighs. He rubs his forehead in a conflicted way and gives you a sideways look. "I'm leaving in five days, you know. I don't want you to be alone. Mismatched or not, he was your friend."

"Five days..." You run your fingers through your hair. "That's such little time."

"We'll spend it together."

"How?" you challenge. "How would I? I'm not supposed to feel love, Yoongi. They'll notice something suspicious if I'm always here with you."

"They'll think you're being a good nurse," he answers. "Come on, Y/N," he says, taking your hands in his. "As your patient, I demand you stay over with me tonight. The other days... you can do whatever you want. I just... I want your company today."

After everything you learned now, you need Yoongi's presence too.

So you nod, crawling into bed with him. He tells you light-hearted stories of fictional societies that might exist in the barren world until you fall asleep.

You confess.

This morning, when you woke up, you swiftly got out of the hospital bed, swept away Yoongi's bangs from his face and gave him a silent goodbye (you didn't want to wake him) before walking out of the hospital. You go straight to the Council. And you admit you haven't been taking the suppressant. You admit that Jungkook isn't a mismatch as you had thought he was—you were without your suppressant and you weren't thinking straight. You tell them that you deserve whatever consequence they will bestow upon you. That you're sorry (though you aren't). And you regret messing up Jimin's procedure (which is the truth).

They are generous to you. Only because they love you like their daughter. Only because you have such a highly held job.

The Council doubles your suppressant intake and declares your curfew will be stricter. But they will move you back to your original home unit and reassign you to Jungkook. They lie to you. They say he loves you very much. You lie right back to them. You say you love him too.

Then, you bargain with them. You ask if your current patient may have an extension date until their transport, explaining that it's hard for you to convince him that Everland is a paradise. You tell them that he repeatedly tells you that he is afraid of Everland. It's a lie. But the Council will make something of it because they don't know you know the truth. In the end, you manage to convince them to authorize a three-day extension.

Now you have a week left with Yoongi. Less time than you'd like, especially with your stricter curfew. But it's more than what you had before.

Your next step is to apologize to Jungkook, hoping he doesn't take your declaration that you were a mismatch too personally. He is nothing but a victim to you, at this point, you realize. You would never know if he truly loves you or not—only ditching the suppressant altogether would tell. And it's not his fault that you don't love him back.

But the Council must've told Jungkook that you weren't in your right mind when you filed a split with him because he welcomes you back with open arms.

"I missed you," he whispers, tugging you into a tight hug.

"Me too," you say, hugging him tighter. It isn't a lie either. "I'm sorry," you say. "I'm really, really sorry, Jungkook." That's the truth.

"The Council told me what happened. I'm sorry about Jimin's transport, sweetie," he says. "Please don't make me worry again, though." He pulls you back and looks at your face, studying your features with what reflects on his eyes as admiration and care. "Please take your suppressants."

"I will," you tell him.

"They're making me monitor you," Jungkook says. "But just promise me, that you'll take the suppressant."

"I promise."

It's a lie.

Every day, you leave your home unit for work just like any other day in your life. But every day, you pretend to take your two suppressants in front of Jungkook, but when he isn't looking, you crush them, dissolve what's left of them in water and flush the solution down the toilet. And then you spend the rest of the day—up until your curfew—with Yoongi.

The two of you try to pretend everything is normal. When, of course, everything is not. But it helps to imagine everything is all right.

"What if Everland exists?" you whisper, poking at Yoongi's chest as he reads his mystery novel. "And when you die, you actually go to Everland?"

"I'll find out in a couple days for you," Yoongi says, setting down his book and quirking a teasing eyebrow at you.

So much for ignoring his impending death.

"I'm more worried about you after I leave," he says. "Don't you ever wish I never told you about what Everland really was?"

You hum thoughtfully. "I don't know. Haven't thought about it much... I guess I'm a bit peeved you forced all this information on me," you tease. "But I think I like knowing the truth, overall."

"Well, that's a relief," Yoongi grins. "Don't wanna piss off the person who's dealing with my transport."

You shouldn't have, but you laugh. "We're really getting into the dark humor, aren't we?"

"We are," Yoongi agrees. "And we'll continue while it lasts."

"How long do you think it'll be until I meet you in Everland—if it exists?"

"Maybe like what, fifteen? Twenty years later? You're still young, Y/N," Yoongi tells you, poking at your cheeks. "You still have baby fat, love."

"I-I do not!" You flush a brilliant shade of red. Something about Yoongi calling you love... You wish you could cherish this feeling forever. Lock it up somewhere and go back to relive it over and over again.

"It's okay. I like the way you look," he says proudly. "Even if you were ugly—which you aren't—I would still love you. Because—" he pauses dramatically—"love makes you see past physicalities."

"Clearly," you joke, gesturing at Yoongi's face and subsequently earning a playful shove from him.

"Do you think we're doing the right thing, though?" Yoongi suddenly asks. "What if we just... run away?" He hums, grabbing your hand and tugging you to his chest, earning a little yelp from you.

"Run away?" you say in a hushed whisper. "That's preposterous!"

Yoongi laughs. "I know, I'm just joking. Imagine if we ran away only to find a post-apocalyptic world outside of Tagna. What if one of us dies? Then what about the other? Or what if we meet the crazy Atnatians? I was totally joking. To run away would be akin to a death wish. Only more drawn out and torturous."

"Yeah, I figured," you huff, turning your body towards Yoongi to frown at him disapprovingly.

He just snorts. "You didn't sound like you had it figured."

"You are very, very difficult."

"I know," he says. "But sometimes, you are too."

"Hey! You—"

You're cut off when Yoongi pulls you in by the waist for a kiss. It's one of those searing ones, where your whole body tingles at the feeling of his warm lips moving against yours. Your hands helplessly splay against his chest as his free hand caresses your cheek. When he carefully flips you over, your legs sandwiched between his thighs, he pulls away from your lips, a bit breathless and winded. And the moment his softened eyes meet yours, you realize this is more than what it seems—the road to passionate lovemaking. In reality, it is a desperate goodbye.

Before tears can well in your eyes, you tug Yoongi in by gripping the collar of his shirt, crashing your lips on his. You want to forget, but everything becomes a reminder that he will leave you in two days. The way he grips at your thighs, the way he spares extra time to memorize every inch, explore every crevice of your body—it's all painful to digest that this might be the last time... Everything he does to you might be the last. You hate it.

But you have to live in the moment.

There's something about Yoongi's movements tonight that reveals his true feelings. You can feel how much he loves you tonight—not from the butterflies in your stomach, but from Yoongi, himself. It's like he's cherishing the moment, so it can last well in your memories.

The Council likes to preach that equality is what drives society to succeed. Everyone must be equal, dress equally, live equally, even die equally (though that's disguised as a simple transport to Everland)—all to ensure that everyone is satisfied with the justness of the system. You disagree. It is unfair.

You feel wronged. Stripped away from the greatness of the life you could've had. But there is a small part of you that is grateful. If things hadn't turned out the way they had, maybe you would've never felt love. Maybe you would've been stuck in your career unit, working as a slave to the Council as they brain-washed you without knowing the truth. You wouldn't have met Yoongi.

In comparison to the truths you've unveiled and the pure bliss you've felt with Yoongi, it's a small price to pay. In the end, you'll have to transport Yoongi to Everland. And then you will go back on with living your life as a citizen of Tagna. Jungkook will do everything in his power to make you fall in love with him. Maybe you will; maybe you won't. The far future is hazy and thinking of it hurts your head.

You'll figure something out, though. You always do.

Finally, you've accepted your fate.

The procedure room is unbearably cold.

Your hands shake as you pull on your latex gloves, and you have to take deep breaths to steady yourself, to convince your assistants that this is like any other normal transport. Except it's not.

"Why are you more nervous than I am?" Yoongi laughs, sitting up on his elbows on the all too familiar hospital bed.

You turn around and shoot him an ungrateful look. "Stop it," you hiss. "I'm trying to concentrate."

"Yes, nurse," he says sarcastically, saluting to you.

You bite your lip so you won't break out in a grin in front of the assistants. Shaking slightly, you turn to the medical cart where the syringe lies, the needle gleaming at you dangerously. You've touched seventy-eight shots, but you can't seem to grab this one, no matter how hard you try.

Finally, you let out a big sigh. "Can all of you leave, please?" you say. "Sorry, not feeling well today."

Thankfully, your assistants are obedient. There's shuffling as they move out of the room, and soon, it's only you and Yoongi left.

"Alone at last," he says, smiling.

"Not so happy you invented that horrible serum, now are you?" you say, frowning.

Yoongi shrugs. "Depends on the wielder of the serum. In this case, I'm satisfied."

With a huff, you snatch up the syringe and hold it out in front of you. "So this is it, then?"

"I suppose it is, love."

Your heart sinks. "I don't know if I can do this, Yoongi."

"Sure you can," he urges you. He grabs your wrist, pulling you close under the upper half of your thighs hits the edge of the medical bed. "Find the vein, insert the needle and you'll be done."

"It's not as easy as it sounds," you say. You stare at the man, a frown etched on your forehead. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too," Yoongi replies. "Come here," he says, pulling you in to plant a sweet kiss on your lips. Something tells you it will be the last one.

"Okay. Okay," you whisper to yourself. "Lemme just find the vein and—" you nearly choke on the heavy feeling at the back of your throat. "I-I just have to insert the needle... press the plunger... Fuck," you curse.

"You can do it. I'll be here, watching you," Yoongi says, giving you a shit-eating grin.

"Thanks. That helps."

"Aren't you going to ask me for my last words, love?"

"No," you say, taking a deep breath and inserting the needle into Yoongi's upper forearm. He doesn't even flinch.

"Why not?" he asks.

"Because," you say in your trembling voice as you begin to press on the plunger, slowly and carefully. "Because," you repeat, "I don't want you to say the lasting line. It's bullshit."

"I had another line in mind."

"Really?" you say. When the plunger doesn't move further, you close your eyes in shock, even disbelief. You fumble to stop the blood from seeping out, quickly cleaning the mess with an alcohol swab and taping a cotton ball to the small wound. There is care laced in your actions, and your fingers linger on his arm.

"Yeah," Yoongi answers, his voice softening. His eyes begin to droop as the serum begins to work on his body. "I love you, Y/N."

"Oh, Yoongs..." you let out a choked sob, grabbing his hand. "Please don't—"

"I'm not done yet," he manages to breathe. He tries to look into your eyes, attempting to grin at you, but his lips don't move at his will. "F-For you and for me..." he trails off. "Because..." he takes a short pause to swallow, "E-Everland is bullshit a-and 'us' should only c-consist of... of y-you and... me."

"Yoongi..." you whisper, squeezing his hand. "I love you too. For you and for me... Yoongi?"

And when there is no sarcastic response, you know he is gone.

Except he's not traveling through dimensions to get to Everland. He's dead. And you don't know what happens when you die.

You can't bear to look at him. So you let go of his hand, turning your back to his body. On cue, your assistants flood into the room. You duck your head to wipe your tears and let them roll his unconscious body out of the room. When you get a short glimpse of his face, you find that there's a faint smile on his lips. You exhale a breath you didn't know you were holding.

As long as he was happy...

And with the way he was cracking jokes just seconds before his death proved a lot. If Yoongi is—was—okay with it, then so are you.

You bid him a final goodbye in your head.

Something switches inside you. A boiling, bubbling feeling. You can’t quite describe it, but it’s intense, making your body tingle from head to toe.

With vehement steps, you walk out of the hospital and straight into the Council. Standing before the Council members, you smile at them angelically.

"Good afternoon, Y/N," they chorus.

"Good afternoon, Council," you say.

"What are you here for today?" one of them inquires.

You look at him, "With all due respect, sir, I just want to have a little wish granted."

"A wish?" another member says incredulously.

"Yoongi. Formerly held a career in unit 38. Deceased. Don't burn his body in the basement under the hospital. Bury him, please. Properly. Give him a coffin and a tombstone and everything. He's done a lot to advance Tagna hasn't he? It's the least you can do."

And before any of the Council members can react, you march away, down the streets and into your home unit.

Confronting the Council and demanding justice from them felt refreshing. Your suggestion might actually be taken, or you might be taken to the jailhouse. You're not sure which. But whatever it is, it won't matter. All you can do now is wait until your time of death comes.

"Y/N? Sweetie?"

Jungkook.

"How was the transport?" your assigned partner says, rushing to greet you with a hopeful smile on his face. "The Council told me they gave him an extension for his transport date because he was so nervous. Did it go well?"

You smile. "Yeah... It was... good. Peaceful. Eye-opening, too."

"That's great!" Jungkook exclaims. "Did he say the lasting line?"

I love you, Y/N. For you and for me. Because Everland is bullshit and 'us' should only consist of you and me.

The saddest... but most content part of your life in just three sentences. Tears begin to well up in your eyes, but a small smile stretches across your lips from the memory. "No, he didn't say it."

"O-Oh," Jungkook says. He awkwardly stares at you in blatant confusion, wondering why you are crying profusely while smiling. He wonders if starting to take the suppressant again messed with your sanity. Jungkook's brows furrow as he begins to worry again. "Y/N..."

"No," you say, shaking your head adamantly. "He said something better than that."

Something true. Not some bullshit line like for us and for Everland.

It feels good to admit to something so genuine. Your grin grows wider.

Yoongi would be proud of you for not being so... so, ersatz. And he's up there somewhere—maybe in your head—nagging at you, teasing you. You'll count down the days until you'll be able to follow him there.

But for now, it's for you and for me, Yoongi.

—masterpost

—masterlist

[midnight-circus]

sometimes you just gotta meme for the new guy.

this is two memes combined so sorry if theres similar questions i couldnt be bothered to post them separately lmao

it’s fuckin huge My Bad

-

Names? If you were to choose another name for your oc, what do you think it would be? Did you choose their name for how it sounds or for its meaning?

Tbh it was a toss-up for a long time between Mallory, Felix and Everaud, and eventually the first two won. I chose it for how it sounded, but as it turned out the meanings of his first two names juxtapose pretty well together (first name Mallory - ‘unlucky’, second name Felix - ‘lucky’). His surname, Valkner, I also picked for the sound - the meaning of ‘warrior’ doesn’t really pertain to him lmao

He hasn’t gone by his legit first name of Mallory since he was about 12, and has used Felix almost exclusively since then. he fuckin hates it. most of the time.

Can your oc play any instruments? Have they ever wanted to learn how to play any? Why?

No, he grew up without much money and instruments would have been a luxury. He’s vaguely considered it as an adult, but is pretty certain he’d be useless so hasn’t bothered trying.

How does your oc fare in the dark? Are they scared? Do they trip over things really easily or navigate like they have night vision? (Or do they have night vision?)

He doesn’t like the dark much, but he’s not scared. He’s just got bad eyesight.

How well would your oc fare as a teacher? What subject would they be best at teaching? What about the worst?

tbh he’d probably be pretty good as a teacher to a group of like...primary school kids, maybe from 5-11 in age. He’s quiet-voiced, fairly mild-mannered, and has a strong sense of fairness and justice - the problem would arise when it came to older pupils, teens and up, trying to get the upperhand, bc he’s not authoritative in the slightest and would probably cave. Give him a room of toddlers tho that he’s only responsible for in short bursts and he’d cope pretty well. Either history or english lit would be his forte; sports would be worst. the boy can’t run.

What was your oc’s relationship with their parents like? If they didn’t have any parents/didn’t know them, who in their life was the closest to a parent to them?

It’s...good? I guess?? It’s complicated. his parents love their kids dearly and Felix didn’t go wanting for affection, but if anything it went too far the other way. He was absolutely smothered as a kid - after several near-death experiences with childhood illnesses (bacterial meningitis, which developed into encephalitis, then sepsis in his leg), his mother wrapped him up in cotton wool and never really let go. He couldn’t leave the house alone, he couldn’t go outside on cold days, he couldn’t move at anything faster than a walk - after being in and out of hospitals from 5-years-old to 8, and then being kept on a shelf from then, it really had an impact on how he learnt to interact with other kids his age. It’s also given him an unstable footing in life itself - he’s never quite certain if he’s going to lose everything at the drop of a hat, because that’s how they used to act around him. Now, with the distance of adulthood, he loves them and appreciates that they were trying their best, but he can’t help but resent them a little if he really thinks about it. He gets around this by not thinking about it.

Does your oc have any allergies, intolerances, or other sensitivities? How dangerous is it? Does this affect their daily life in any way?

he’s got an allergy to letting himself be happy it’s very serious

Does your oc prefer being in a crowd or being completely alone? How many people can be around them before they get uncomfortable?

Generally he’s more content alone - conversation doesn’t come naturally to him, particularly if it’s a crowd of strangers, and he’s more content in his own company. If he does find himself in a crowd, he will take himself to the edge of the room and people-watch rather than mingle.

How open is your oc to trying new things? Are they the adventurous sort, or would they rather stay in their comfort zone? Why?

He needs to be talked into things, otherwise he’d never try anything - he knows his comfort zones and he’s very comfortable in them, and is not inclined to venture outside. If he’s nudged into doing something, he may end up finding that he enjoys it - doesn’t necessarily mean he’d do it again under his own steam, but he doesn’t always regret the experience.

Does your oc have any best friends? Who was/is their closest friend? What about their worst enemy?

Pathetically enough, he doesn’t, really. Sylvia was his best, and to be honest his only friend, and when she left his social life left with her. He loves her still, but he loves her platonically (even if he hasn’t realised that yet) and that wasn’t enough for her, understandably. Outside of her, there’s not really anyone else.

No enemies. He’s not important enough to have enemies.

How dangerous is your oc? Are they completely innocent, or someone to be feared? Do others know?

tbh Felix’s level of danger is about the same as a puppy with a knife in its mouth. like yeah it might get you by accident but its way more likely to hurt itself and its not really done anything to deserve that so really its more important to get the knife away from it for its own benefit than yours

What is your oc’s vision like? Do they require glasses, are they completely blind, or do they have 20/20 vision? Does this have an effect on their life?

He wears glasses for pretty much everything - he’s not blind without them, but his vision’s bad enough that he wouldn’t be able to cope for the whole day if he left them at home.

If your oc were to be arrested for something, what would it be for? For being too kind, for a legitimate crime?

Probably for getting mixed up in something he didn’t mean to get involved in - Felix is the sort of person to say ‘yes’ to one request because he felt pressured and then find himself 20 ‘yes’s down the line embezzling money from the government for the Serbian mafia with no idea how he got there. He’s quite easy to manipulate - a person who knows how to press his buttons can generally work the answer they want out of him. 

How quiet or loud is your oc? Are they easily capable of sneaking around without being heard, or do they feel it’s impossible to stop talking?

He’s pretty quiet - tries not to draw attention to himself if he can avoid it, and he doesn’t really speak unless he’s spoken to.

How stylistically fancy is your oc? Or would they rather go for comfort and plainness instead?

His primary concern is durability and price - he needs something that will either last for as long as possible so he doesn’t have to replace it any time soon, or something that is cheap enough that it doesn’t matter if it wears out, and ergo, Primark. He oftens window-shops for nice-fitting, fancy clothing in the London boutiques he passes on the way to work, but has never bought anything like that in his life and can’t bring himself to even consider it.

What’s your oc’s preferred mode of transportation? Walking, vehicle, (or in a sci-fi/magic setting) teleportation?

His preferred mode of transport is a car, but his isn’t always working properly so when he has to, he takes a bus - he doesn’t like walking if he can avoid it, partially because it wears him out and partially because he’s kind of physically lazy.

Is your oc always late, always early, or always right on time? Is there any reason for this?

He’s always early, because he leaves early, because he’s already envisioned about 20 different disasters that could make him late on the way and he’s trying to circumvent all of them.

How empathetic is your oc? Or are they closer to being a sociopath? Any reason why?

Felix doesn’t really realise that he’s empathetic - he thinks he’s just doing what everyone does, but in fact he will go out of his way to improve a situation for someone if he thinks they’re being hard-done-by for no benefit to himself, even to the extent of bending or breaking rules. It’s partially why he got into the law-scene - he wants to see things bettered for people who need it.

How much does your oc swear? Or do they keep completely clean? Why is this? Is there any situation where they would be the opposite?

Swearing doesn’t come naturally to him - he’s one of those people who will swear only under their breath and still manage to feel guilty about doing it. If he is going to swear out loud, he does it in German and it always comes out clumsily.

How does your oc’s own perception of themselves compare to how other people see them? Is your oc aware that other people see them differently (if it’s different)?

It’s pretty different. In his mind, he’s pretty useless - a bit of a waste-of-space who has coasted through life by pretending to be better than he is, kind of dull, kind of boring, kind of unattractive, altogether too much of Nothing Special for anyone to really be bothered with. Realistically, he comes across as responsible and competent at his job, perhaps a little highly-strung and nervy but nevertheless perfectly capable of managing the responsibilities he has. It’s his own self-doubt that cripples him, for the most part - people see it in him, and perhaps it makes them wonder if there’s a reason for it.

Is your oc a workaholic, or do they find it hard to be busy at all? Do they find it easy to relax, or must they have something to do at all times? Why?

if he’s not working, he’s thinking, and that simply won’t do. Felix’s whole life is work, for the most part - he throws his all into it, and isn’t sure what to do with himself when he’s sitting at home alone in a dead-quiet flat.

How energetic is your oc? Do they have trouble sitting still or do they feel low on juice all the time? Any reason why?

He’s constantly exhausted. It’s because he’s depressed. He hasn’t figured that out yet.

How does your character sleep? Peacefully, fitfully? What position do they sleep in? What is their typical bedding like?

Not very peacefully - Felix is a light sleeper, so although capable of getting to sleep relatively quickly he wakes up in fits and starts throughout the night. He tends to sleep curled on his left side, on bedding that is cheap, serviceable and durable. He can’t afford to buy anything decent. He finds it easier to stay asleep if there’s ambient noise in the room - white noise, the TV, whatever.

Does your oc have dreams or nightmares? What are they like? Is there a recurring one?

He’ll suffer a pretty bad nightmare here and there, generally to do with hospitals or medical procedures, but they aren’t chronic.

How easy to annoy is your oc? Do they have common pet-peeves or are they stoic in response to everything? What is their reaction if the source doesn’t stop?

he’s real easy to annoy lmao. He’s got a list of pet peeves a mile long and he’s very easy to get a rise out of, so people who enjoy getting a reaction (Lyon) find him very entertaining pickings. He keeps telling himself not to get so worked up because it only encourages things, but he can’t help it.

How does your oc view housework? Do they absolutely hate it? Do they enjoy having their surroundings neat and tidy or do they not notice?

He hates doing it, but he really enjoys a clean space afterwards and goes a long way to keep things organised. Disorder stresses him out - he particularly can’t bear people coming into his space and messing it up.

Your oc has to make something for an art exhibition. What would they make? How terrible is it? Would they enjoy making it?

oh christ. the thing is, he’s actually not that bad at art - he’s got a good handle on anatomy and perspective and can reproduce images or photpgraphs fairly well - but he thinks he’s useless and has never shown anyone anything. he’d produce a pretty solid sketch of like a coffee shop at 5pm or something dull like that, apologise profusely for the result, and hate every second of it.

What is your oc’s vocabulary like? Does it match the way they talk? How would you describe their speech?

He speaks pretty well - he’s precise with his words and keeps a quiet, even tone, and his vocab is fairly developed. If there’s a flaw with his speech, it’s that he speaks rather too quickly, because he’s used to being constantly interrupted - it becomes a race to get the sentence finished and his point across, before someone can cut him off.

He has a south German accent, but it’s a little softer for years of living in England - it gets stronger when he goes back home to Munich.

Is your oc more likely to follow instructions exactly, throw them out and figure it out on their own, or make it all up? What are the results like?

He follows instructions to the T, and doesn’t have the impulse to experiment and mess around with them for fear of making a mistake that he’d then have to clean up; that being said, if it becomes a matter of fair treatment, he may be inclined to bend the rules here and there.

Is your oc afraid of touch or do they actively seek it out? Is there a reason for this? What are the exceptions?

lmaoooOOOOO he’s petrified, whilst at the same time desperately craving it. He’s horrendously touch-starved, but his childhood lizard-brain learnt to associate touch with painful medical procedures, so he shies from it by nature.

How is your oc about medical care? Do they avoid any form of healthcare that they can, do they seek it out over every little scrape? Do they treat their injuries/illness all by themselves?

Felix carries an awful lot of medical trauma with him; he’s terrified of medical care, whilst simultaneously being something of a hypochondriac convinced he’s got some sort of Terrible Disease at all times. to be fair, this is because he once had a Terrible Disease, which then led to a second and then a third Terrible Disease before the first could even be treated, so he does have form for it. He also can’t handle blood and has been known to pass out at the sight of it, but would rather do that and recover on the floor than go to hospital.

He will avoid hospitals At All Costs.

How competitive is your oc? Is every little task something that they can win, or are they just in competitions for the fun of it? Is there anyone they’re most competitive with?

He’s sort of competitive accidentally - he doesn’t want to be, but he feels like he needs to be in order to succeed. He is desperate to prove himself, desperate to show his mother than he is more than capable of managing his own life, but he will run himself to exhaustion trying to get there. He’s happiest when he’s left to do his own thing without feeling like he’s competing against others, when he’s content that he’s appreciated by the people around him and is able to take that appreciation at face value, but he hasn’t come to that realisation in himself yet - he just thinks he’s doing it wrong.

How skilled at lying is your oc? How frequently do they lie? For what reason? What situations would be the exception?

lmao he can’t lie to save his life it’s actually kind of sad to watch. he’s a Blusher, for one, so he’s already tripped coming out of the gate, and then he starts falling over his own tongue the second he’s asked a question he can’t give a truthful answer to until it’s painfully obvious to everyone. it’s just sad.

What is your oc’s immune system like? Are they invincible to illness, or are they compromised completely from the slightest of dirt?

His immune system is terrible - a side-effect of his childhood. If there’s an illness going around, he will catch it.

Does your oc do anything “just for the aesthetic”? Or are they completely practical in everything?

Totally practical by habit, but perhaps he’d be happier if he wasn’t. He’s not used to doing things just because he wants to, because he’d enjoy the experience - there has to be a reason for it, else he’s not justified in doing it. Same goes for purchasing things that he wants - if he can’t come up with a good, solid, practical reason to buy himself something, he won’t buy it. ‘Because you want to’ is not reason enough.

If you had to choose a single object to act as a symbol for your oc, what would it be?

One of those candles that re-ignites itself when you blow it out.

If your oc could only eat one thing for the rest of their life (while miraculously not suffering from malnutrition), what would it be?

He’s got a massive sweet tooth and spends a lot of time baking, so probably cake - he’s fond of little gay French patisserie nonsense.

How prepared is your oc? Ready for the worst no matter what, or completely lost in every situation? Would they have a medkit when it was needed? Would they have an umbrella if it rains?

As much as he panics, in a legitimate bad situation he is capable of keeping his head - he runs on adrenaline and suffers the consequences later. He carries a first-aid kit in his car, but has never needed to use it, and yes, he always has an umbrella.

How charitable is your oc? Or are they more stingy with their resources and money?

god. He is stingy, but not out of a miserly nature - he just legitimately does not have much money. He never has, ever since childhood, and that shit is ingrained in him - you watch what you’re spending, because you never know when you’re going to need to make an emergency payment.

If someone was describing your oc to someone who had never met them, what distinguishing features would they mention? How would one identify your oc in a crowd?

Short guy, kind of round-faced, round glasses - kinda looks like he’s lost even when he isn’t. Jumps if you bump into him.

Does your oc have any pleasure that embarrasses them so they keep it secret? Or are they open about all the things they enjoy?

literally everything that he enjoys, he’s embarrassed about. He likes old black-and-white movies and he’s embarrassed about that. He reads shitty romcom fiction and he’s embarrassed about that. He enjoys cooking, he’s embarrassed about that. He actually enjoys sex, believe it or not, and he’s embarrassed about it. Don’t even fuckin get him started on his kinks because he’s embarrassed about them. tbh Felix doesn’t really know how to enjoy himself without guilt or shame, because he always feels like he needs to justify the things he likes and he doesn’t know how to do it. He’s just embarrassed.

What is your oc’s stamina like? Would they be able to run a marathon, or not run at all? What about walking/another physical activity? How are they with exercise in general?

Shitty stamina - he’s got weak lungs and the extent of his running ability is running for a bus and then needing literally four hours to recover. He sort of makes a vague attempt to exercise at home, but is easily discouraged and would just rather lie on the couch having a crisis of body-image.

How long can your oc stay focused on one task before they get bored? Do they constantly have to switch things up or do they hyperfocus? What sort of things is it the opposite for?

Felix is the king of repetitive, menial tasks. Set him in front of a diary or a spreadsheet and he’s well away. He really doesn’t mind thoughtless admin labour, even as he insists that he’s capable of handling more responsibility - and although he is more than capable, he also feels comforted by the predictability of data-entry. A nice mix of both would be ideal.

What smells bring back specific memories to your oc? What are those memories like?

Antiseptic and rubber floors, with that underlying stink of sickness. They’re not good memories.

How jumpy or easily spooked is your oc? Do they have a fight or flight reflex to being startled, or are they never startled at all?

He’s super-jumpy and easy to startle, which is delightful to some people. Between fight or flight, he’ll fly.

How polite is your oc? Do they do everything with the utmost courtesy, or do they completely refuse to say please and thank you?

He’s unfailingly polite, because his mother would have beat him with a shoe if he wasn’t.

How flexible is your oc? Can they touch their toes or do they have trouble just sitting down because of how stiff they are?

He doesn’t think he’s flexible at all, but certain intercurricular activities with Lyon suggest that he’s more flexible than he thinks he is.

What is your oc’s typical walking like? Do they speed-walk everywhere, do they take quick short steps or long paces? How loud are their footsteps?

Because his legs are kinda short, he walks pretty quickly just to be able to keep up with people - quiet steps, because he’s trying not to draw attention to himself.

If your oc was in a video game, what would their idle animation be?

Cleaning his glasses, putting them back on, squinting through them, then taking them off and cleaning them again ad infinitum.

What topics does your oc know the most about? Are these obvious or would these be surprising to others?

He’s a talented cook and has absorbed quite a lot about flavour profiles and all that shit that I know nothing about so I’m not going into details lmao. He’s also got a bank of knowledge about classic films that he keeps to himself, as he’s never convinced anyone would be interested. He’s got a lot of shit that he keeps to himself for this same reason, and therefore there’s quite a lot he could surprise people with if the right topics came up.

What time of day is your oc most awake? What about most tired? Do they get up at the same time every morning without need of an alarm, or is their sleep schedule all over the place?

Tries to tell himself he’s a morning-person. He isn’t. Left to his own devices he’d wake up about 10 and fall asleep about 2am, but he’ll insist if asked that he’s naturally inclined to wake up early.

What would someone blackmail your oc with? Would they be successful in getting what they wanted?

they’d get hold of a list of his pornhub browsing history and yes, they would absolutely be successful.

How easily does your oc get attached to things? Does everything have a sentimental value to them, or do they see nothing as more valuable than its practical use? What about with people/animals?

He gets attached to people and animals very easily, but as for things - he gets angry when he breaks or loses items, but that’s more to do with being stressed about having to pay to replace them than anything sentimental. He’s thrifty to a fault and won’t throw anything out until it’s absolutely unusable, to the point that he’s gotten pretty skilled at sewing repairs in order to avoid getting rid of clothes. He does have sentimental attachments to a few things, but not the majority.

How stubborn is your oc? Are they easily convinced of the opposite opinion, do they not agree but let it happen anyways? Or do they cause conflicts with their inability to budge in their decisions?

He’s not stubborn, as such, but he does know his own mind. He can be talked around or into things quite easily, but he does like to feel as though his voice has been heard.

How much has your oc traveled? Why is this? Would they like to travel more? Or are they perfectly fine with staying home?

He’d prefer to stay home - there’s too much room for error travelling abroad, and the risks don’t really outweigh the benefits for him. He travels back and forth between England and Germany, and he has visited France before as a boy, but that’s about it.

What signs tell that your oc is nervous? Do they fidget, is it in their expression or the way they say things? Or are they very skilled at hiding it?

He fiddles with his glasses and fidgets his hands around, and is also (as mentioned) a blusher - he’s Not Subtle when he’s nervous or flustered, which in turn makes it worse.

How superstitious your oc? Do they end up following them ‘just in case’? Or are superstitions incredibly important to your oc? What are some that they believe? What about the ones they don’t?

He says he isn’t superstitious, but I’m not certain that’s true - I think he’s superstitious despite himself. He follows them, then gets annoyed with himself for following them and assures himself that he won’t do it again, but then when it comes to it next time he follows them again anyway. He won’t walk under ladders, won’t open an umbrella indoors and he broke a mirror once and almost died. The only one he doesn’t believe is unlucky black cats, because he’s never met a black cat that was unpleasant.

[slurrmp]

           all you need to know about spyro’s original characters:                                            oc: tanaka matheson                                        fandom: star trek/doctor who                                                  status: semi active.

THE BASICS

Name: tanaka devonne matheson Nicknames: ana, bear, annie Gender: female Pronouns: she/her Sexual Orientation: bisexual Age (actual age): 42 31 Place of Birth: lithgow, new south wales, australia Citizenship: australian/american

                                                  APPEARANCE

Age they appear: early twenties to mid twenties Hair colour: brown Hair style: mostly always either straight down, or in a ponytail. Eye colour: green Birthmarks/scars/marks: two inch scar above her eyebrow, multiple on her shoulders, one across the underside of her belly due to a c-section. burn marks on her lower back and some on the back of her left hand. scar in the centre of her right hand palm. Piercings: ears ( double lobe, helix, auricle ) Tattoos: tiny devil horns on her shoulder blade.

Build (curvy, toned, etc): unusually tall for her family, can seem a little bit lanky, but ana is muscled, was trained to wield a sword and even a gun when she was a teenager. Weight: around 65kilos Height: 5′7″ Clothing style: mainly jeans and a top, never really seen in anything too fancy unless the occasion calls for it. tracky pants and a sweat shirt when lazy around the tardis. mainly comfy clothing, when not in uniform. Overall appearance: always seems like she’s got some place to be. is never seen without sneakers on her feet.

Trinkets/jewelry: a locket that her mother gave her before she died. her father’s dog tags. Equipment/accessories (things they are never without; ex: a backpack or a notepad) baby bag. seems ridiculous but those bags can hold anything and everything in them. talk about the doctor having never ending pockets. when ana brings her baby bag with her, you know there’s important shit in there.

                                          INNER WORKINGS

General mood: ana was raised in a military family, she has her moments were she can be fun and silly, but she is mostly a rather serious person, who wants to make sure that everything is going well. especially when she has her kids. Mental state (any mental illnesses?): ptsd is strong with this one. with her world being plunged into darkness and being separated from her father when she was only 6 years old. then being dragged into another universe and across time. it gets to a person. ana has also suffered from post natal depression. Alignment (neutral good, chaotic evil, etc): chaotic neutral Morals: big family morals. she end up being torn from her family, so she wants to make sure that she always keeps hers safe. Temperament: very much known as the runaway throughout the galaxy. time and space have even heard of her.

Quirks: chews her lower lip. picks at her nails. twirling of her hair (that’s the one that annoys HER the most) Pet peeves: when people separate their families.

Strengths: extremely loyal. patient. kind. strong. Weaknesses: her family. her friends. it’s rather strange how easy it is to manipulate her.

Fears: death. Intelligence: ana never got the chance to even GO to high school. everything that ana knows was learnt through her aunt and uncle. when ana was pulled into another universe, and she managed to get herself settled with jack at torchwood, she applied at the local university (thanks to a couple of faked documents by the doctor) and was able to studied midwifery.

Priorities: her children. Desires: to see the entire universe. all the way to the beginning of time, to the end of it. Likes: engineering. which is strange - she wanted to help people, but just fixing things became a thing for her to do to get her mind off of stressful times. Dislikes: not being with her father anymore, not even being with her family.

Vices: can be too serious at times. always thinking about her family instead of the needs of many others.

                                           RELATIONSHIPS

Friends: significant friendships, the doctor, jack harkness,

Family: Miles Matheson ( FATHER, MIA. ), Tamara Wayne ( MOTHER, DECEASED. ), Taylor Matheson ( TWIN, BROTHER, ALIVE. ),

Significant other: there uh ... there’s been many. but at the moment, there’s none.

Kids: Ethan Matheson ( SON, ALIVE. ), Grace Matheson ( DAUGHTER, ALIVE. ), Lucas Matheson ( SON, ALIVE. ), Leah Matheson ( DAUGHTER, ALIVE. )

Enemies: many of the same enemies as the doctor, they really have a knack for getting her into trouble.

                         EMPLOYMENT AND EDUCATION

Jobs: works for torchwood. star fleet officer. Profession: midwife

Income (if any): it all depends on where she is at the time. at home on earth in the 21st century it’s about 28 000 pounds.

Furthest education: university. Degree (if any): bachelor of medicine (midwifery) cardiff university

                                   EXTRA INFORMATION

Criminal record: there’s just too many to actually add.  

Social media accounts (if any): instagram, snapchat bc snapping the torchwood group while away with the doctor is a lot of fun.

Reputation: ana’s known around the universe as the runaway. it was said that even though she had the skills and the talent to slay her enemies where they stood with her sword, ana would runaway - just like the doctor had taught her. it doesn’t help that in the future Q flaunts her around the galaxy and too star fleet.

Skills: extremely talented with a sword.

Talents: ana can actually play the piano rather well.

Hobbies: no time for hobbies. though - seeing the universe might be considered a hobby.

Special abilities (if any): spending enough time on the tardis weird things might happen.

Transportation: the tardis mostly, but when she’s home in the 21st century ana would use one of the torchwood cars

Living conditions: an apartment in the heart of new orleans. it’s such an obscure place to live, but all of her kids loved the french quarter, it’s basically the base of operations for the matheson clan.

Pets: a black cat called salem and a dalmatian called snoopy.

                                               AESTHETIC

Colors associated with: pastel blue, teal, aqua, a lot of different blues. Their personal aesthetic: the pitch blackness and the smattering of stars when looking out the window. watching the stars zoom past while in warp speed. Song that suits them: KLLER QUEEN - QUEEN

╳ BIO:

there has always been something about tanaka matheson. she had always been a special child. when she was nine years old, three years after the blackout, she left with her aunt rachel, away from her uncle ben and cousins, charlie & danny to find her way back to her father, a general of the monroe militia. she learnt the basic skills to survive, becoming one of the best swordsmen in the entire militia just like her father. she was still too young when she returned to miles to be apart of the army, but that did not stop ana from wanting to learn everything there was to know about swords and how to become an amazing fighter like her daddy.

she learnt more about how to run and fight than simple maths. however, miles made sure that she was well educated when it became obvious she liked to travel with him when he WENT on long tours than to actually learn basic rules - eventually when ana was thirteen (13), miles made sure that ana stayed in school, which sometimes included him taking the men in the middle of the night so that he didn’t wake her and cause her to stowaway in the carriage.

season one of revolution plays out normally - just with the addition of a twenty year old ana being incredibly protective over miles and charlie.

life seemed to be going smoothly until one day she found a crack in the wall of an abandoned hospital they were squatting in. this crack in the wall caused her to fall into another universe. it was a crack in time and space - it should have SWALLOWED her whole and erased her from reality, but instead the crack spat her out on the other side, in a different universe, on a different planet, IN a different time.

she never really thought about the consequences of her absences back on the other side, miles was in hysterics that not even nora could calm him down from - he searched high and low for his daughter, only to come up empty six months down the road. she was considered K.I.A and miles was more ruthless than ever before.

ana had no idea where she ended up or HOW the hell she got there, but it was on that planet that she met a man called the doctor, a girl named amy pond and a woman called river song. they all seemed to know her rather well - it was explained that time travel was a funny thing. from there - she fell into one adventure that felt like it would never end, until abruptly it does. one of the - ALIENS, a weeping angel, snagged her around the wrist - but it didn’t kill her. they had been KILLING PEOPLE all day, snapping necks instead of feeding on their life energy, at least that’s what the doctor told her they did but this ONE - this ONE angel didn’t kill her, instead it shoved her FURTHER into the past. but why this one angel ? no one could really answer this question, not even when ana finally reached the moment in time the long way around. this time instead of landing in a cave on an alien planet, she landed on the lap of one captain jack harkness in world war two, london.

it was from there that she met the doctor again, but this time he looked different - looked older and a girl called rose tyler from there - she was pulled into ANOTHER crazy adventure, but to earth, though the date, they told her was 2005. it hurt ana’s brain to try and wrap around the fact that she wasn’t born yet but she was still her fully grown self. twenty years old and in a different time and universe.

it was from there that ana grew to love the doctor, jack and rose - up until the time the doctor left jack in the year five billion and ended up regenerating, a move that ana figured he was trying to avoid her questioning, all on christmas day (and her birthday) (21). it was something that time lords could do apparently, and it was from there at the beginning of 2006 that ana found herself twenty one years old and alone. not wanting to travel with a newly regenerated doctor, not after leaving jack stranded in the future and the fact they had been butting heads almost the whole time he had been awake. it was only the beginning of february that ana stumbled across torchwood and captain jack again.

this is where ana’s timeline gets a little complicated - ana and jack find themselves getting a little bit closer - a lot close as they become intimate (on multiple occasions) and it’s only a few months later (half way through season one) that ana finds out she’s pregnant. but it’s an event that attracts the wrong kind of attention (madam kavorian had her nose out early on) however, ana runs back into the doctor again, who is suddenly with a new companion after her and jack have an argument one afternoon - he was getting close to ianto, she wasn’t mad that he was, just mad that jack never told her about it. she was four months pregnant and had already been on a ship that was crashing into a sun, in the early 1900′s with a doctor who was human and stuck in 1969 with no TARDIS. it was during the year that never was that ana gave birth to a healthy baby boy, ethan. born july 15th 2007 (22) aboard the valiant.

ana didn’t continue on with the doctor and martha when everything returned to normal and the master had been stopped. she had a baby to look after and a captain that wouldn’t slow down - during the year, they had gotten closer once more - ana forgave jack about keeping lanto a secret and who knew maybe the three of them could work something out (they never did). but it was during the winter of 2010 (23) that ana lost her son. (leaving out the events that occurred during children of earth and miracle day) ana was left alone on earth and that’s when they struck.

the headless monks - the silence and madam kavorian, she wanted to take a child born from an immortal and a human to see if she could transform him into a weapon, see if he had gained some of his father’s powers of immortality - it was the worst night of ana’s life, and the first thing that she did was call the doctor (who had regenerated yet again), crying on her bathroom floor almost throwing up due to the fact that her son had been taken right from under her nose. the floppy haired doctor made a promise that he would find ethan for her - find her son. during events of season six, there’s other shit that involves my time lord oc, oliver plus finding out that there’s a version of herself in this universe, though she was born a boy, called taylor plus another baby, this time a girl (25), season seven is split into two, ana being around during the power of three but not for the ponds last goodbye, she was dealing with family issues at the time.

it was only on ana’s birthday at the end of season seven, just before the doctor regenerates, that the crack in space and time appears again on christmas (the planet), pulling her in - yet again she doesn’t get erased or forgotten. clara seemed to think it was the time lords trying to keep her alive.

landing on the grassy ovel of star fleet academy in 2255 (just turned 26). this kind of anomaly - that seemed to like throwing her throughout time and space - attracted a lot of attention. the continuum caught wind of ana when her appearance in the universe caused a stir in the timeline. this was the moment when she met Q. no stranger to time travel, thanks to the doctor, ana was only worried about the fact that she had no way of getting home - it was then that Q managed to distract her with trying to create a fake background for her which would allow her to join star fleet and end up becoming a member of the USS enterprise, to fight the battle against nero (28) & khan (28) in the next five years.

it was during the short break between khan’s attack and the battle of yorktown that ana was whisked away from that certain timeline - all because Q was bored with how things where going, calm and boring and no fun at all. keeping her backstory and her star fleet academy degree ana was placed on board the USS enterprise yet again, however the year was 2365 (still 28) and this timeline was completely different. run by jean-luc picard, Q introduced ana in a rather horrible way.

it was almost two full years of Q and ana getting each other into trouble, whether it was with the rest of the universe or mostly amongst the enterprise crew, however, during the events of Wolf 359 (30), ana is assimilated along with captain picard. after the event and ana was back to ‘normal’, the continuum decided to throw ana away from Q, who was banned from seeing her and even knowing where she disappeared too.

ana landed on board the NX-01, the very first space bound enterprise.

spending almost exactly three years (33) of her life on board, Q managed to find her after she was almost fatally wounded on one of the away missions, which included a run in with the xindi. Q, who was having his run ins with voyager and her crew at the time, dumped her in the delta quadrant where ana spent the next three years (35) once more on board a ship, where she grew incredibly close to the crew and the captain. the australian certainly had a habit of doing so, even with her rank of lieutenant and being only a nurse.

it was then that she stepped in and demanded to be taken back home, to her time - to the crew she first became close with, the aos crew, to which natasha a lady Q who had felt sympathy for ana’s situation, being the most notorious Q’s plaything and threw her back on board the 1701 during her second year of the five year mission. which leads into star trek beyond and also helps the fact that ana knows the main antagonist of the movie (37).

now this is where it gets complicated once more - ana does manage to find herself back on 21st century earth. but because she had been affected by the time vortex, the continuum and just being a time traveler as well - ana’s body still registers as a healthy 31 year old - while with some help of borg nanites that had to remain in her body, other wise her respiratory system would have shut down and she would have suffocated to death, which helps her to regenerate a lot faster than most humans. season 9 & 10 of doctor who occur.

REST OF BIO TO COME. WILL INCLUDE DS9, SEASON 11 OF DOCTOR WHO & DISCOVERY SEASON 2.

[feynites]

Scum Villain AU

Welp, fell down a rabbit hole of translations for novels written by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu, and my brain would not let go of the idea for a Scum Villain sharkbait AU. I blame @pyrrhy also for being a fantastic enabler.

So, this is a thing now! But first, on Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, the general synopsis is that a book reviewer dies suddenly with his last thoughts being of how unsatisfied he was with the harem/stallion novel he just finished reading. He finds himself subsequently transported into the body of a minor ‘scum’ villain from said book, with the task of fixing/improving the story. Of course, the character he’s currently been cast as was, in the original novel, dismembered and killed by the protagonist.

In the interests of not having that happen, our intrepid hero immediately starts trying to suck up to the protagonist. He does a good job. In fact he does such a good job that the protagonist ends up falling in love with him, and therein lies the core of the story’s shenanigans.

If you wanna read the translations, it’s ongoing here at bc novels. For other works by the same author, there’s Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (Mo Dao Zu Shi, which also has an animated series) over here at Exiled Rebels Scanlations, and Heaven’s Official Blessing is being translated here at Sakhyulations. Translating is hard work so if you read and enjoy any of ‘em, it’s nice to consider donating to the sites, too!

Some of the above stories definitely fall into problematic pitfalls of the slash genre, though. While I am a big fan of the pacing and storytelling Mo Xiang Tong Xiu pulls off and love her characters, I’ve been forewarned on some issues too. As I’m still reading my way through I can’t give my personal assessment on a lot of that stuff or offer more in-depth warnings for everything. But it should probably be mentioned.

Warnings For This Fic in Particular: At the outset of our story, Uthvir is underage. No romance is gonna take place while they are, but when they meet Thenvunin is an 18 year-old posing as their teacher, and Uthvir is 15. This is a slow burn. I also follow the original plot points of the story pretty closely but change up the order/direction of some things, too.

Additional Notes: In the original novel, the story that the lead character gets sucked into is a fantasy/cultivation novel hybrid with elements from a whole thwack of other genres, too. I’m leaning more heavily into the fantasy stuff because I don’t have much experience with cultivation novels, just for reference, but it should be noted that a lot of the story elements draw expressly from Chinese culture and I can take no credit for them - just in case anyone who’s totally new to these genres reads along. Also, I took some liberty with the names of things, because just throwing in Chinese words seemed unfitting and I’m not following the entire script on world-building elements. (Plus, in the novel, the story’s author is notoriously bad at naming things anyway.)

Alright, my apologies for the huge stack of notes/explanations! Please enjoy reading. The characters Calain and Jhe’andal (not seen in this chapter but bound to appear later) belong to @pyrrhy, who’s graciously loaned them to me so I can mess around.

“Stupid author, stupid novel!”

  Thenvunin was not entirely surprised that those ended up being the last words he uttered in life. Though he is rather regretful about it. But at the time, processing the sudden failure of his ongoing health treatments had been harder than just fixating on the fact that, probably, the last book he was ever going to read in his life had been that terrible trainwreck of a harem fantasy novel.

  That popular disaster of a book, ‘Immortal Demon Way’. With records broken on copies sold, but most critics more or less agreeing that it was mindless dreck. Except, the problem was, it wasn’t really ‘mindless’ dreck. There had been parts that were really promising. That was the real tragedy of the entire mess. The story had plenty of interesting side-characters and concepts, some intriguing world-building, even the promise of genuinely engaging content. But all of it had been tethered to a truly terrible main plotline. A black hole of a plot that managed to be boring and offensive by turns, even if the protagonist did manage to come across as somewhat compelling once in a blue moon.

  Because ‘Immortal Demon Way’ was pure self-indulgent trash. The leading character, Uthvir, was one of those characters whose tragic life led them onto a dark path of retribution and conquest. Despite being pure-hearted in their youth, the constant mistreatment from people around them eventually blackened their heart, until they were the sort of person who wear a friendly smile while torturing a man to death. And naturally, over the course of the story, they managed to accumulate a truly massive harem, all filled with beautiful women. Even though the author - writing under an anonymous pen name of ‘Half-Demon Prince’, had come out and said that the character wasn’t exclusively attracted to women - that claim never manifested in the actual text. Which made the whole gesture feel quite performative.

  Honestly, Thenvunin probably would have never picked up the book if he didn’t need to review it for the site he worked for. He’d never been fond of harem works, where the hero collects love interests like they’re filling up a basket of flowers. It had less to do with the numbers involved, and more to do with the sheer fact that more love interests usually meant less development on any particular relationship. Plus, inevitably, there would be scheming plotlines within the harem, and Thenvunin had never liked reading about women causing one another to miscarry or murdering each other’s babies to try and keep ahead in ranking. Luckily, ‘Immortal Demon Way’ hadn’t included a lot of such content, and what was there had been easy to skip. Enough so that Thenvunin had found himself speed-reading most of the ‘romantic’ parts. A sure sign of failure, given that romance was his actual preferred genre.

  But yes, all in all, ‘Immortal Demon Way’ was one of those stories he would have been happy not to think about ever again. And instead, it had ended up being his last thought in life.

  Well…

  In his old life, at any rate.

  But somehow, after he had died, he had found himself hearing an odd robot voice in his mind. Sort of like one of those automatic screen-readers.

  <Request processed… final request accepted… Welcome, Participant, to the ‘Immortal Demon Way’ project! Your dying wish has granted you access to this system. Starting points are tabulated at 100. Story goals - to improve the overall quality, reduce plotholes, and revitalize interesting conceptual material that was overshadowed by [Garbage Main Plotline.] This system is now receptive to inquiries.>

  W. ..what…?

   “...What’s going on?” Thenvunin had asked.

  The obvious question, really. He had felt panicked, or rather, like he should be panicked, but also like everything he could feel was very far away. Shock? He’d gone into shock before. It was a similar sensation, but not exact. But then again, there could be a lot of variables with that sort of thing. Everywhere around him just looked blurry, and pale. As if he was standing in a very modern office and wearing smudged glasses. He wondered if he’d survived after all, and if this latest disaster in his health had damaged his eyes so badly.

  It was a chilling thought. Or, it should have been.

  <Participant has been accepted for the currently-operating ‘Immortal Demon Way’ project. Activation words ‘stupid author, stupid novel’. Combined with a death wish, the pathways have been opened up for Participant’s consciousness to be transferred to the world of ‘Immortal Demon Way’.>

  World? What world?

  “I don’t understand,” Thenvunin said. “Am I in the hospital? Where’s my mother?”

  That last question was perhaps more embarrassing than he would have liked, but it didn’t seem as if he was feeling embarrassment too keenly, either. And his mother always came whenever he was hospitalized. Thenvunin was only eighteen, and had been sick all of his life. Naturally, his mother worried a great deal about him, and the hospital staff knew to inform her whenever he had a serious incident.

  <Participant has been accepted for the currently-operating ‘Immortal Demon Way’ project. Participant is currently being housed in a waiting room. Acceptance of admittance will trigger consciousness-transfer to feasible candidate for accomplishing compatible story goals. Refusal will result in immediate transference back to the participant’s native world. WARNING: Refusal not recommended. Participant’s corporeal status in native world has been determined: Deceased. Probable outcome of refusal is fatality.>

  Deceased…?

  Thenvunin reeled, and even with his current level of detachment, struggled to process it all. He tried asking the “system” more questions, but none of them seemed to garner satisfactory answers. Asking who had created it didn’t get him anywhere. Nor did asking how it knew anything about him. Asking what this whole ‘Immortal Demon Way’ project was just prompt a repeat of the ‘story goals’ - it sounded like he was being moved into a story in order to fix it? Like a sort of virtual reality?

  He had a great deal of trouble processing the whole concept.

  But then, there didn’t seem to be anything for him to do but accept it in the end, either. It could all be a trick, but, Thenvunin did remember dying. Or something that felt close enough to it that he couldn’t bring himself to take that risk. He was afraid of dying; afraid enough that he could feel it, even as he drifted in that strange ‘waiting room’.

  It was a feeling that followed him as he woke up in another strange room. But this time it was one he could see. His heart was hammering in his chest, and he felt like he had a terrible headache. The room around him definitely wasn’t a hospital, however. As he sat up, he could see sunlight streaming through several beautiful, open windows. The air smelled fresh, like the mountains he had visited once, before his father left. He sits up to find himself laid out in a comfortable bed, with a clothe on his brow, and a very light but comfortable robe on his body. The pale green fabric is the same colour as his eyes, but he only stares at it for a moment before his attention is arrested by something else.

  His body.

  Which is… definitely not his body.

  There’s a curtain of long, wavy hair falling down past his shoulders. His chest is broad and… chiseled? How could he possibly have a chiseled chest? And his arms are muscular, and long, and utterly devoid of the scars he had gotten from his car crash eight months ago, when he had tried to drive himself to the hospital and veered into a lamppost instead. Thenvunin is almost too shocked to move, but after a moment, he finds himself hurriedly pushing back the blankets and looking at the rest.

  His legs - !

  His legs look… they look good! Moreover, as he moves, he’s startled to realize that he doesn’t feel any pain. None at all, apart from his headache. Under other circumstances he would assume he was on some heavy painkillers, but obviously, this might not even be the case? He moves his legs and marvels at the ease of it, swivels his hips and feels nothing, and after a minute he cannot help but leap out of bed and begin jumping around, amazed and entranced…

  …And more than a little disconcerted. This body is totally, completely different from his own. He looks down at it and intellectually knows that he’s inside of it, but it scarcely feels that way. After a few minutes of either celebrating or panicking, or possibly both, Thenvunin finally locates a full-body mirror next to a dressing station in one corner of the room.

  He stares uncomprehendingly at himself.

  His eyes are the same, and his hair is the same - if somewhat longer, he thinks - and there’s a certain congruity between his facial features. But the man staring back at him is undeniably, completely different. He looks both strong and elegant, somehow. More muscular than Thenvunin would have ever idealized himself as, but the strength in those muscles is making him feel slightly giddy as he moves. And he’s tall. He’s not stooping over in the least, not struggling to keep his shoulders straight, feeling no pain from his surprisingly trim waistline…

  It can’t be him!

  He’s still trying to reconcile the idea when he realizes he has no clue who this character is, either. From the system, he gathered that he was going to be transported into an existing character’s body. But there are a few who might match the description of this one, and even more who were mostly undescribed. The only thing he knows for certain is that he is not Uthvir; they would not be so tall.

  Right?

  System, who am I supposed to be?

  <Congratulations on beginning your Death Wish Journey! Participant’s assigned designation is: Thenvunin Thenerassan. Status is: Project Virgin. Would you like some Beginner Tips?>

  He freezes in place, at the sound of the response which he can somehow tell is purely in his own mind.

  Did the system just call him a virgin…?

  How would it know?!

  Although it seemed to know everything. Thenvunin paused in embarrassment, before the rest of the message finally registered. His character is Thenevunin Thenerassan…?

  Wait, ‘Thenerassan’? That villain? The corrupt instructor who was always taking time to abuse and harass Uthvir, when they were still young and full of hope for the future? He’d never even realized the character had a first name! Though admittedly, he hadn’t read all of the author’s shared notes and ‘tidbits’ on social media. For a moment he is thoroughly offended. How dare this horrible character share his name!

  And then he remembers.

  Thenerassan…

  Thenerassan dies in this story!

  And not peacefully, oh no. After years of abusing Uthvir and then finally betraying them utterly at the grand tournament, the hero comes back seeking vengeance, with their heart blackened and ruthless. They utterly decimate Thenerassan’s reputation, until there is no one on earth who would pity him, and eventually end up taking him prisoner. Then they cut off his limbs, one by one, and blind him, and use their demonic blood to torture him until he can finally take no more and expires.

  And Thenvunin himself had once visited the story’s forums to express disappointment that this character wasn’t castrated, too. Considering everything he had done.

  He feels faint, going white as a sheet while he stares in the mirror. So consumed with terror that he doesn’t even hear the door to the room opening.

  “Brother?” an unfamiliar voice calls.

  Thenvunin whips his head around, and freezes in place. A new kind of fear gripping him, as he looks at this unfamiliar person. Presumably a character in the story. For half a heartbeat, he’s almost afraid that it’s Uthvir, come to drag him off for torture and death. But then his mind catches up with him. No, this is… that wouldn’t be right. This place, based on the descriptions, must be Thenerassan’s chambers on Quiet Peak temple. The author of ‘Immortal Demon Way’ had only very loosely followed the structure of a ‘cultivation’ novel, taking grand liberties with the various stages and processes of most established works. The Peaks, as he recalled, were little more than supernatural stomping grounds; like elite clubs for people who had attained immortality through cultivating their internal energies, and becoming incredible fighters.

  If he is at Quiet Peak, then he mustn’t be at a point in the story where this character has been ruined, yet. But that’s only one relief; he still finds himself looking at a concerned face he doesn’t recognize.

  “...Yes?” he finally ventures.

  The stranger comes into the room. He is a man. Handsome. Long dark hair, pretty brown eyes, middle-dark complexion. He could be any number of a dozen characters, really, but Thenvunin supposes he could narrow it down to the ones populating Quiet Peak. It was an early part of the story, so one he remembers fairly well.

  Before he can latch onto a guess, though, the stranger pauses and gives him an assessing look.

  “Are you feeling better?” he asks. “Your disciples said you collapsed out of nowhere on the practice fields. Compassion took a look at you but couldn’t see any problem, either with your health or internal mystic energies. She advised that we let you rest…”

  “Ah,” Thenvunin says. “Um. Well. Yes, I… fainted.”

  The stranger raises an eyebrow.

  “You fainted? Have you been neglecting yourself in some way, brother?” he asks. He seems cordial enough, which further limits the possibilities for who he could be. Dark hair, brown eyes, friendly enough to check in on the unlikable Thenerassan’s health…

  “...Venavismi?” he ventures.

  The man blinks.

  “Yes?” he asks.

  Oh thank goodness.

  “I. Um. I seem to be… not feeling well…” he says. It feels like an odd thing to say, since technically speaking, he doesn’t think he’s ever felt so well before in his life. He almost jumps out of his skin when he hears a soft ‘bing’ inside his head, though.

  <Warning: Impending Out of Character Behaviour Alert. Current Participant has OOC Restriction Locks still in place. OOC Restriction Locks can be removed once Achievement: Character Development has been obtained.>

  Thenvunin freezes in place again.

  What?

  <Please specify query.>

  What are OOC Restriction Locks?!

  <OOC Restriction Locks are a branch of Participant Autonomy Limitations. Violating locks will result in points penalties relative to the degree of violation.>

  Meaning… if he behaves out of character, he’ll be penalized?

  But Thenerassan is a monster! Thenvunin can’t act like that. It would be beyond the pale! And besides, how can he possibly change anything in this story if he has to act like an amoral reprobate the entire time? No, wait. There was more, wasn’t there?

  What’s ‘Achievement: Character Development’?

  <Certain limitations will be removed by the system once achievements have been obtained. To obtain Achievement: Character Development, Participant must earn points by completing actions that fall within the parameters of Participant’s behaviour as well as Character: Thenerassan’s.>

  What?! How am I supposed to do that, I’m nothing like that wretch!

  Thenvunin is still in the process of thinking furiously in his mind when Venavismi seems to decide that he must be rattled. He’s accustomed enough to being handled by nurses that being steered back towards his bed barely registers in his mind, until he finds himself being settled onto the mattress again.

  “...more rest, brother,” Venavismi is saying, genially. He seems to be about as nice as the impression his character gave off, in the story. Thenvunin always felt rather badly about his death. Which… he suddenly recalls, was Thenerassan’s fault. Retaliating in a fury after the accusations against him had landed, he had killed the first people who attempted to apprehend him, only for Uthvir to swoop in and put a stop to him. One of them had been Venavismi. Decapitated, as he recalls…

  He feels an inexplicable rush of shame. Not that he’s responsible for Thenerassan’s actions, but, well…

  “Thank you,” he says. “You are a very upright person, Venavismi, even if you can make terrible jokes sometimes.”

  <OOC Restriction Lock Violation. Point deduction, -15.>

  What? Just for saying ‘thank you’?!

  <Character: Thenerassan would not thank Venavismi without ulterior motive. -5 Deduction. Character: Thenerassan would not compliment Venavismi without ulterior motive. -5 Deduction. Character: Thenerassan would also not display weakness in front of a potential rival. -5 Deduction. Deductions reduced by 50% due to mitigating factor: Plausible Disorientation.>

  Internally, Thenvunin fumes. Plausible?! He is most certainly disoriented, of course he is!

  But Venavismi does look very surprised.

  “Um. Thank you, brother…?” he ventures. “I think I had better get another healer to attend to you. Do you remember hitting your head on anything when you collapsed?”

  “Of course not, I don’t even remember collapsing!” Thenvunin snaps, flustered and unhappy with having lost points. Even though he doesn’t know what the points mean. He lets Venavismi bow his way out of the room, the atmosphere awkward and disconcerting, and then finally just drops his head into his hands.

  What do all these points even mean, System?

  <Would you like to see Beginner’s Tips?>

  …Yes. Yes, I would, if that will explain this whole confusing mess!

  <Beginner’s Tips have been activated! Additional Mode: Character File Recognition has also been activated. New characters will now appear with their names provided by the system, in the event that Character: Thenerassan would be able to recognize them. For a cost of an additional 100 points, Easy Mode may be activated. Warning: current point levels insufficient to make payment. Regarding point system: actions furthering project goals generate points. Lock violations or insufficient story progress will incur penalties. Negative point status will result in Participant’s ejection from the project.>

  Ejection from the project…?

  In other words, then, if his points go into the negatives, he’ll be sent back home.

  Where he’s… dead.

  And what happens if I die during the course of this project? He wonders, thinking of the chilling prospect of Thenerassan’s canonical fate.

  Death of the Participant will result in ejection from the project.

  So… death, again.

  Thenvunin lets out a shaky breath.

  He would… yes, he would definitely rather avoid that, all things considered. But by the time a healer - whose name Thenerassan apparently would not have bothered to know - comes to his chambers, he doesn’t feel much closer to regaining his equilibrium.

   ~

   Thenvunin takes an entire day to rest from his ‘mysterious illness’. In the evening, one of his disciples comes with something more substantial for him to eat. Desire, or ‘Squish’, as the narrative had nicknamed her. She is a pleasant girl, and a teenager, though how old she exactly is would depend on when he’s arrived on this scene. Assuming it’s prior to Uthvir’s descent into hell, she could be anywhere between fourteen and nineteen. Thenerassan - the original - had lusted after this girl, behaving inappropriately the entire time. Seeing the girl come into his rooms, Thenvunin is appalled twice-over by that particular story element. Here Thenerassan was supposed to be her mentor, but he had scarcely seemed to teach her anything except that authority figures weren’t to be trusted! And then she had joined Uthvir’s harem, all full of scandals and intrigue, and… admittedly, Thenvunin had rather lost track of her character after that.

  He didn’t recall her has terribly complex. Mostly just sweet, and devoted, a simple ‘childhood friend’ style love-interest. Though he’s surprised when she comes in, and he notices that she lacks the typical ‘dainty’ appearance of such a girl. Instead she is heavy-set and… well, fat. With a round face and broad nose, and a tumble of curly dark hair. She is still quite beautiful, and obviously more than strong enough to handle the training at the peak, but Thenvunin doesn’t recall imagining her this way at all from her description.

  Then again, Half-Demon Prince, the author, hadn’t been as typically prone to describing the female characters’ measurements and ‘charms’ as most writers in the genre. There had been a lot of fanart… perhaps the standard interpretation of this character was based more on a popular fanartist’s work, than on all the possibilities contained in her description?

  But then, why should the ‘project’ choose an atypical interpretation, rather than the most common one?

  He supposes that all has to do with how the system even works, and on that front, it has remained entirely silent.

  “Teacher, will this meal do?” Squish asks him. Respectful, but a little distant.

  It suddenly strikes Thenvunin - Squish was Uthvir’s only childhood friend. The protagonist. If he is to survive this ordeal, it seems absolutely paramount that Uthvir not want to kill him.

  “This meal is fine,” he says, with a dismissive wave of his hand. He focuses intently on Squish’s face. “Tell me, how old are you this year?”

  For a moment, he’s almost afraid that the system will tell him that was out-of-character. But it remains silent, and Squish’s expression turns somewhat reluctant.

  “Sixteen,” she tells him.

  Sixteen… which makes Uthvir fifteen. Three years. Thenvunin has three years to undo Uthvir’s hatred of him. But this also means that Uthvir has already spent two years around the Original Thenerassan. Being bullied, being starved, being beaten, being left out in the cold… Thenvunin pales at the thought of all the rampant child abuse. His only, minor consolation is that Thenerassan hadn’t liked to dirty his own hands. He had preferred to simply encourage the other disciples’ bullying, or to dole out punishments that simply resulted in Uthvir’s misfortune, by doing things like handing out complicated assignments too close to curfew. The other Thenerassan had been concerned with appearances, at least, and the reputation of his sect. It was probably the only reason why he hadn’t just immediately tossed his poor disciple off the mountain.

  “My parents have said that they will outright refuse all petitions for my hand until I am twenty,” Squish says, jarring Thenvunin out of his thoughts.

  He blinks at her.

  “Sensible of them,” he replies.

  <OOC Restriction Lock Violation. Point deduction, -5.>

  Oh, for-!

  He doesn’t bother to ask what that is about, realizing in a rush of nausea that this interaction must seem like he is digging into his student’s personal business to figure out if he can browbeat her family into handing her over to him. What a sick man the original truly was! He has to fight the urge to clarify things, knowing it will only cost him at the moment.

  How many points do I have left? He wonders.

  He isn’t entirely addressing the system, but it answers for him anyway.

  <Current point total: 80>

  Since he got here, he’s only managed to lose points…

  Squish stares mildly back at him. He lets out a breath.

  “Do you know where Disciple Uthvir is?” he asks, attempting to sound as neutral as possible. Neutral cannot really be out of character, right? If Thenerassan was always spitting furious every time he mentioned Uthvir’s name, surely the other mentors at the peak would have had to notice?

  Thankfully, that assessment seems correct, as there is no warning or ‘ding’.

  Squish’s expression turns wary.

  “They’re still doing the tasks you assigned them this morning,” she replies. “They’ve been working as hard as they can.”

  Thenvunin purses his lips. Scowling, but not at his student; he’s just trying to figure out how he can start to repair things, when one of the most concrete aspects of Thenerassan’s character was his ardent hatred of all things Uthvir.

  “Send them here,” he decides.

  <Warning->

  How can it be OOC? This is entirely self-serving! He argues. If I don’t get on Uthvir’s good side, I’ll die horribly. If the original Thenerassan knew that, don’t you think he’d start being nicer, too?

  <Beginner Tip: motives attributed solely to the Participant will not be considered in assessments of OOC Lock violations. Participant must also be advised of total points devaluation in the event of Character Identity Compromise. Revealing Participant’s nature as a transplanted outsider to non-Participant individuals within the project will result in Total Project Reset and ejection of all current participants.>

  Thenvunin swallows.

  The food on the lovely tray in front of him makes him slightly nauseous. Squish looks suspicious, but after a moment, she can only nod obediently and leave to go get Uthvir. She looks as though she might say something to him, for a moment. But after a moment passes, she only shakes her head, and then leaves.

  So now he needs to think of something that the original Thenerassan would do, that will put a stop to all these abuses - or at least, begin to - without losing him any further points. He has no idea how difficult it will be to regain points, since he hasn’t gained any so far. And that ‘Easy Mode’ that the system mentioned before seems like the sort of thing he might like to unlock, but he’s definitely not going to do so when it will bring his point total remotely close to 'zero'.

  By the time Uthvir shows up, the food has gone cold, but Thenvunin thinks he might have happened on a solution. He has moved from his rest bed to his desk, unable to sit still. But he finds himself somewhat frozen again when he finally sees them.

  Uthvir.

  The terrible demonic tyrant who will eventually slaughter hundreds. Who will build a massive harem of beautiful lovers, all vying for their affections. The sharp, dangerous, deadly protagonist of ‘Immortal Demon Way’.

  …But, they’re just a child.

  Or a teenager, but Thenvunin’s a legal adult and feels very adult compared to the tiny figure who walks into his chambers. They’ve cut their hair, he notes. He forgets what age they did that at in the story, but thinking on it, it probably wasn’t long after they arrived on the peak. Their uniform is ill-fitting but clean, pulled from standard storage. They have large, red eyes, and soft features. Really, they look younger than fifteen.

  But what catches most of his attention is the large blemish on the top of their cheek, and the ugly cut at the corner of their jaw.

  Thenvunin stares at them while they shift in place. Waiting to see what kind of torment he has in store for them, no doubt.

  I can’t do this. How can I be cruel to a child?

  <Warning: Impending Out of Character Behaviour Alert.>

  After a moment, Thenvunin clears his throat, and reminds himself of his plan. He makes certain his features retain a cold look, with great effort, as he reaches into a pocket of his robes, and retrieves a little jar of healing salve that the healer left with him. Uthvir’s wary expression does not abate as he tosses it to them; but with their reflexes, of course they catch it.

  “It is disgraceful for one of my disciples to go around looking like that,” he declares, lifting his chin and pursing his lips to keep from saying anything else. Poor thing, poor thing, oh you poor little thing… “From now on, there will be no more transgressions to call my good character and teaching into question.”

  Uthvir seems to pale at his assertions.

  “Teacher,” they say, hurriedly. “Please don’t turn me out. I swear, I will not - I will not provoke them anymore. I know I have been slow at learning how not to, but I think I have made progress... I will redouble my efforts! Please, I have nowhere else to go...”

  Thenvunin frowns at their fright, before realizing that Uthvir does not recognize what the healing salve is; they probably think he’s conjuring up an excuse to kick them out of the sect. But even Thenerassan couldn’t really do that - despite his best efforts, Uthvir’s acceptance onto the mountain was the doing of Mana’Din, the Peak Leader.

  “Don’t be foolish,” he snaps, and they fall immediately silent. “Do you not even know what a healing salve looks like?”

  The OOC Warning remains mercifully silent, but Thenvunin feels like he is dying on the inside.

  Uthvir stares uncomprehendingly down at the little jar he gave them.

  “This… is healing salve?”

  They don’t even know what it looks like! I can smell it from here, but they’re clueless?! They’ve never seen it before?!

  Come to that, Thenvunin hadn’t seen it before, either. But apparently he still has some sense memories from the Original… which would also explain why his coordination isn’t completely shot, even if he still feels like a ghost sitting in someone else’s body.

  Uthvir doesn’t have the excuse of transporting themselves between worlds, though. They should know what a salve smells like even better than he does. Or they would, if Half-Demon Prince hadn’t given them such a reprehensibly deprived childhood. The realization makes his heart crack in half.

  “I expect you to use it,” he says.

  He braces himself…

  At the ominous ‘ding’ in his mind he nearly dies inside; but to his surprise, the system’s tone isn’t its usual ‘points deducted’ one. It takes him a moment to really register what it’s saying.

  <Congratulations! Points toward Achievement: Character Development earned, +10.>

  ...How many points do I need to get the achievement?

  <Beginner’s Tip: Achievements are unlocked at 100 points gained, determined from the moment achievement challenge is set..>

  That’s… that’s not so bad, actually. Thenvunin would almost feel good about it, if he hadn’t just been unreasonably cold and cruel to an injured teenager.

   ...He's going to have to do this at least ten more times. He takes it back, this is terrible.

  But Uthvir looks uncomprehendingly at the salve for a moment longer. Before they seem to remember that they’re in the same room as their villainous instructor, and then quickly drop into a bow.

  “Thank you, Teacher,” they say.

  “Hmph,” Thenvunin replies. “You can go.”

  Uthvir doesn’t waste any time in getting away, probably grateful to escape without having something unpleasant happen to them. Once they’re gone, Thenvunin drops back onto his bed, and puts his face into his hands. His shoulders shake, as tears begin to form in his eyes, and spill through the cracks of his fingers.

  It’s just a story, he tells himself. Even if it’s different to experience it firsthand, all these people are just characters in a book. It’s not really real.

  Is it?

~

Thenvunin manages to knock his point totals down to 65 before he finally begins to feel confident in manipulating the OOC Locks. Though he still hasn’t managed to earn any new points, he’s figured out some things about the system, and how they seem to be lost.

 For one thing, witnesses are required. Thenvunin can do any number of out-of-character things in private, but the system will only notify him of a ‘ding’ if there’s someone present to see it. Which is a good thing, because Thenvunin finds himself breaking down in private quite a bit. The system will also generally warn him if there’s someone liable to witness his out-of-character moments - and whatever else might be said, he does appreciate that. Particularly when he’s been weeping in his rooms, and one of his disciples or another immortal from the peak is on their way to find him.

 It’s not that he’s thoroughly miserable, though. It’s just a lot to take in.

 Quiet Peak is a really beautiful place. Thenvunin doesn’t think he’s ever been anywhere so lovely before in his life. The peak is situated in a long chain of mystical mountains, and is one of several sacred peaks where spiritualists who have achieved immortality live and congregate. It’s a place replete with nature. Thenvunin’s home is one of several small buildings - almost a village unto itself - situated around a large main temple. It’s summer when he arrives, so the air is clear and warm, with the occasional cool breeze whirling its way around the mountain paths. Lots of small animals fill up the natural spaces of the area. Birds and rodents, foxes and stranger, more fantastical creatures from Half-Demon Prince’s imagination, like Phantom Lemurs and wolves made of branches and vines, held together by ambient nature energy.

 To a normal person, some of the animals would probably be quite dangerous. But Thenvunin’s body, as he ascertains, is more than just fit and healthy. He seems to have all the supernatural powers of the immortals in the story. Along with a mystical sword that the original Thenerassed would have pulled from the peak, a blade that was manifested from his own innate energies.

 Thenerassan - or rather, Half-Demon Prince - had called the blade ‘Swan’s Grace’. It’s one decision of the old Thenerassan’s that Thenvunin doesn’t mind. The name seems to suit the sword, which rests easily in his grasp, even though he’s never held a sword before in his life. It’s a beautiful thing. Pale and elegant, with a white handle, and a purple tassel tied with enchanted beads that help bolster spiritual energy.

 It’s one thing for Thenvunin to know that his body seems to remember how to do some things, though, and another for him to really feel comfortable doing them. The more Thenvunin thinks about upcoming events, the more he finds himself sweating under his collar. There are battles to be fought. Actual battles. Situations where making even the tiniest slip-up could result in death. Thenvunin doesn’t think it’s enough to simply rely on his reflexes, reflexes can’t provide strategies or help him think his way through more complicated situations, or really decide how to apply the skills that he - apparently - now has.

 So, when the Peak Leader, Mana’Din, comes to investigate his ‘recovery’ from his mysterious illness, Thenvunin doesn’t waste much time before requesting access to some of the secluded mountain caves that are used for those attempting higher levels of cultivation. Or attempting to regain spiritual equilibrium. He remembers the caves from the books; they were frequently mentioned, and Uthvir even retreated to them on occasion, when a difficult battle had depleted their strength.

 Mana’Din is, like Squish, quite different from what Thenvunin had expected, but still well within the bounds of her character description. The Peak Leader is a petite woman, dark-skinned and placid in her countenance. She wears a white half-mask, and an elegant white robe, and regards Thenvunin with what seems to be genuine concern. Almost immediately, he likes her. Though sensing the amount of energy contained within her aura is somewhat disconcerting; Peak Leaders are very strong, of course. Mana’Din is no exception.

 In the original story, she was yet another character who died at Uthvir’s hands. Though, more tragically than the original Thenerassan. Uthvir had challenged her for control of the peak. Mana’Din had fought gallantly, but in the end, after all that had led to that moment, the peak’s forces were so weakened that she was no match for a full-powered and determined Uthvir. She as one of the few female characters in the story who actually died, rather than simply falling into Uthvir’s harem after being defeated. Some readers had been quite unhappy about that.

 As he invites her to take his morning tea with him, Thenvunin feels another pang of inexplicable guilt. The original Thenerassan’s machinations were a huge component to the weakening of the peak - and to Mana’Din’s inevitable downfall.

 “Venavismi told me about your collapse. I came to check on you while you were still unconscious. Forgive me, I would have come to check as soon as you woke, but preparations in the valley took longer than expected.”

 Preparations in the…?

 Oh! Thenvunin’s pleased to realize that he actually knows what Mana’Din is referring to. The tournament, still scheduled a few years from now, will take place in the valley south of Quiet Peak. Because of the potential dangers of the event, the Peak Lords themselves oversee all the preparations, creating shields and checking the security, and making certain that all possible precautions can be taken. It’s a long endeavour, which is why tournaments are not held more frequently. As an expert in placing barriers, Mana’Din’s skills in particular would be required.

 The thought of how badly the tournament still goes puts another twinge of guilt in Thenvunin. He has to bite his tongue to keep from mentioning that extra security will most definitely be needed.

 “Are things going well?” he asks, instead.

Mana’Din waves dismissively.

 “Of course,” she says. “I’m more concerned over you. I don’t know whether it’s good news or bad news that the healers seem baffled by what’s happened. Do you think it was some sort of attack?”

 Thenvunin clears his throat, and shakes his head.

 “It did not seem that way to me, though it was… disconcerting,” he replies. Lifting his tea cup, he takes a slow sip. The warm liquid helps to settle his nerves a little, as he prepares his rehearsed lines. “My concern is for the equilibrium of my internal energies. Healers may not notice everything on such a front. If my leader is willing, I would like to retreat to the Secluded Caves, to better attune myself to what may be going on within my body.”

 He braces himself. But fortunately, Thenerassan had generally worn a mask of courtesy around his leader; there is no ‘ding’.

 Mana’Din makes a contemplative sound, and then inclines her head.

 “If you think that would help, then certainly,” she says. “I will gladly open the caves to you. But do you think there is a chance you could unbalance your energies? You should not be left to go alone, in that case.”

 Mana’Din is blunt. Thenerassan would have taken offense at the implication that he could unbalance his own energies via meditation, but Thenvunin can only see genuine concern in her expression. Spiritual unbalancing is very dangerous. It can lead to explosive and self-destructive behaviour, as well as lashing out. Left unchecked, it can, as he recalls, cause madness, permanently damage an immortal’s abilities, or even lead to death. And while the original Thenerassan may have been an immortal of indeterminate age, who was very accustomed to cultivating his internal energies, Thenvunin himself is… not.

 However, his inexperience could be glaringly obvious to any witnesses who see him try to practice. And if people start to become suspicious, then it could lead to his discovery as an intruder, and then the dreaded ‘project reset’.

 Thenvunin’s not sure what the bigger risk is. He hesitates.

 Mana’Din seems to read his silence as offense. She lifts a hand.

 “Please don’t mistake my concern for doubt. This is a mysterious situation, so, taking some exceptional precautions may be wise,” she tells him. When Thenvunin hesitates again, she purses her lips, and taps the side of her teacup. “Perhaps a compromise? There are certain segments of the cave system that are more open than others. Many of Battle Peak’s disciples are currently using them in early preparation for the tournament. In the event of some calamity, being in that system would probably make it easier to find help, rather than simply using the more traditional caves allotted to our peak…”

 The original Thenerassan would have found such a suggestion offensive, Thenvunin thinks again. But would he have protested to his leader? Complaining might seem uglier than just capitulating, or even taking advantage of the situation. Something niggles at the back of his memory. Something about Thenerassan and the caves and Battle Peak… but he doesn’t have a lot of time to dwell on it, as Mana’Din looks at him expectantly.

 He puts on a tight smile.

 “I suppose, under the circumstances, that would be reasonable,” he concedes.

 Mana’Din relaxes a little, and offers him a more genuine smile in return.

 “That’s a relief. I’ll worry a little less, now,” she approves. Nothing dings. Thenvunin lets out a silent breath, and sips more of his tea.

 Really, Thenvunin can’t help but think. How did it escape your notice that the original Thenerassan wouldn’t have been worth worrying about to begin with?

 He doesn’t ask that out loud, though, of course. Despite his repugnant nature, the original Thenerassan currently retains a spotless reputation, marred only by occasion rumours of his ‘harsh’ teaching methods. And that reputation is currently very useful to Thenvunin, who is not looking to ruin it by being an actual child-abusing monster. Even if the system is making that challenging for him.

 Mana’Din tells him he can set out for the caves in a few days’ time, after she has established things with Battle Peak. That’s a good development, he thinks, but it still leaves the matter of Uthvir up in the air.

 While Thenvunin has been doing what he can to try and mitigate the bullying going on, it’s an uphill battle with the OOC Locks tying his hands. The original Thenerassan had a lot of disciples, though, as Thenvunin recalls, most of them will die as cannon fodder during the tournament. The thought makes him sick to his stomach. Even if they’re mostly a gang of bullies, barring Squish and Uthvir, they’re still children. Well, teenagers. And they’re following the lead set for them by their teacher. Thenvunin is a bit lost at sea on what to do about it all. However, he knows for certain that if he leaves things just as they are, with the senior disciples in charge, it won’t go well for Uthvir.

 The trouble is figuring out how he can mitigate that without breaking character.

 He’s still turning the matter over in his thoughts later the same day, when he finally decides that, caves or no, he needs to get some practice in.

 Despite his lingering troubles with adjusting to having a totally new body, the fact that he actually has energy and a shocking absence of pain keeps making him antsy. All the beautiful nature around him, the strength in his limbs, the air in his lungs, it makes him want to do things. His fingers itch to see what the sword at his belt can do. His heart speeds up at the thought of actually being a warrior, a guardian, someone who can fight and protect people and be gallant and strong. The giddiness he feels over it is even enough to push back his worries about dying, and he finds he doesn’t feel any guilt at all in basically stealing all of these things from the original Thenerassan.

 With all that in mind, Thenvunin sets out before evening to find a more secluded spot on the mountain. He has to travel for a while to do it, heading down and into the woods, with Swan’s Grace on his person. The sword feels light, and he finds he often notices its absence more than its presence. He wears green robes that blend in with the pale leaves of the willowy trees that grown in the region, and passes over a woodland stream, before finally finding a good spot.

 After triple-checking to make certain that he’s alone, Thenvunin draws his sword, and takes a deep breath.

 He swings it.

 It slices elegantly through the air.

 Another swing. His body remembers motions that Thenvunin has never made before, and after a few more attempts, he finds himself falling into patterns that feel natural. Sword-fighting forms. He pays attention to the way his body moves, or tries to. But it’s exhilarating enough that he soon finds himself distracted by the sheer joy of it all. Swan’s Grace sings, metal through wind, and as his spirits rise Thenvunin finds flurries of air whip up around him. The original Thenerassan was strongly attuned to the wind element. It seems Thenvunin is, too, as the gusts of wind follow his movements, and make the fallen leaves around him dance.

 He is so enraptured, he never even notices the tiny figure who stumbles upon him. Arms burdened with firewood, eyes wide as they see their teacher practicing his forms.

  ~

  Uthvir freezes in place and stares dumbfounded for a moment.

 They have seen Master Thenerassan demonstrate techniques before, of course, but such demonstrations have tended to be very simple and mechanical so far. Put your feet here, hold your practice sword like this, sit this way, don’t move like that, and so on and so forth. They have yet to actually see their instructor fight - and of course, they still haven’t. But as they watch, they feel a sudden insight as to what that might look like, and it seems somehow wholly unexpected.

 If they ever had to guess, Uthvir would never suppose that Master Thenerassan’s techniques were so… so…

 Lovely?

 They feel almost like a voyeur, somehow. As if they have stumbled upon the man bathing rather than practicing. The most shocking thing is probably the look on his face, though. From their angle Uthvir can only see part of it, but it seems as if Master Thenerassan is smiling. Smiling as he dances with the wind and strikes out with his sword, moving through forms so complex that Uthvir can only even recognize half of them.

 Something in their chest aches with longing.

 They want to be that graceful, and powerful. They want to be a master who can rely on their own strength.

 They watch, fascinated, until it starts to occur to them that if Master Thenerassan is out practicing in the wilderness by himself, he probably doesn’t want to be seen. Maybe there are some secret techniques that he’s doing? Uthvir’s fear of getting in trouble gradually starts to overcome their interest, and they pull back, retreating the same way they came by and being careful to walk in the footprints they already made, to avoid stepping on twigs or crunching leaves. Every once in a while they glance back, unable to help themselves until Thenerassan is finally out of sight. Then they resolutely keep going, as their heart hammers excitedly in their chest.

 They feel as though they have just gotten away with some kind of mischief. Even though, taken at face value, they don’t even know what they mischief would qualify as.

 Master Thenerassan could probably enlighten them if he actually caught them, though. And probably assign them even more chores as punishment. Sneering at them from behind his fan.

 Although… he seems to be more patient with Uthvir than usual, these days. Maybe Uthvir is actually making fewer mistakes? They’ve found the thought very heartening, even if the other disciples still seem to hate them as much as ever. Except for Squish, of course. Master Thenerassan gave her a new training manual the other day, and she promised to let Uthvir look at it, too. They were going to go this evening, but then Elandaris cornered them and told them to go find firewood.

 A lot of the older students shirk their chores onto Uthvir. At first, they’d hoped doing things would be a good way to make friends, but it seems they’re always doing them wrong. Uthvir’s not entirely clueless, although sometimes it feels as though they are. They like to think that it’s the amnesia at fault. The first thing they can recall in life is running, confused, out into the road in one of the southern cities, and nearly falling straight into Lady Mana’Din. They don’t even know how they came by their amnesia; they were first brought to Quiet Peak as a mystery to solve, rather than a disciple to train. The only belonging of any real value that they can claim is the necklace they were wearing at the time Lady Mana’Din found them.

 Uthvir never takes it off. They’re deathly afraid of having it stolen. The simple leather cord it’s on is nothing special, but the amber-gold stone, rough and uncut, always feels a little warm against their skin. Lady Mana’Din thinks it might be a Spirit Shard. The only other person they’ve ever shown it to is Squish, and she likes it a lot, too. Uthvir knows she’d be thrilled if they gave it to her, but they can’t bring themselves to part with it. Even if they don’t know why, it’s… theirs.

 As if drawn to the current of their thoughts, the necklace in question slides out from under their over-sized collar. Uthvir pauses, shifting the firewood in their arms so that they can reach up and tuck it away again.

 “Hey!”

 They look up, startled, at the sound of an unwelcome voice.

 Elandaris!

 Hastily, Uthvir finishes shoving their treasure away again, and takes a wary step backwards. They nearly lose their balance, burdened with the firewood in their arms. Elandaris seems to be alone; they don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

 “I’ve nearly finished,” they say.

 “Took you long enough,” Elandaris replies, marching determinedly towards them. He points at their chest. “What’s that?”

 “What’s what?” Uthvir asks, playing dumb. “The branches…?”

 Before they can react, Elandaris reaches out, whip-fast, and yanks the piece of cord around their neck. Uthvir fumbles and their treasure pops back out of their collar, as their heart speeds up.

 Oh no!

 The older boy’s expression twists in a mix of anger and triumph as he reaches for the spirit shard. Uthvir manages to whirl away in earnest then, though, dropping the firewood they’re carrying. To their horror, the branches and logs fall directly onto Elandaris’ feet.

 A disciple of Elandaris’ level isn’t going to be as fragile as most mortals, so Elandaris is at little risk of having his foot bones broken. But that doesn’t mean it’s not still a painful thing to have an armload of wood dropped right onto his shoes.

 “I’m sorry!” Uthvir immediately exclaims. Elandaris reels back, cursing, before his face twists in anger and he lashes out and punches Uthvir clean across the face.

 The force behind the blow is more than enough to send them staggering.

 “You clumsy oaf!” Elandaris exclaims. “How dare you! You could have injured my feet. That would set my training back. Are you trying to sabotage me?!”

 “No!” Uthvir assures him, spreading out their hands. “No, of course not! I would never! It was an accident, you grabbed me and-”

 “Clumsy piece of shit!” Elandaris accuses again. “Either you did that on purpose, or you are a waste of training! Come back here!”

 Uthvir’s attempts to move further away are thwarted by Elandaris grabbing them. They try and counter his grip, but the older student is faster, and pulls at their treasure instead.

 “And where did you get this?” he demands.

 “It’s mine!” Uthvir insists, reflexively.

 “Yours? Where would you get a spirit shard?” Elandaris demands. “Even a cheap-looking one like this should be beyond the means of a beggar’s child like you. And don’t tell me someone gave it to you! I know no one would. You have no coin and you have no friends, so the only answer is that you stole it.”

 “I didn’t steal it!”

 Elandaris hits them in punishment. Uthvir knows they shouldn’t argue, but this is their treasure. If Elandaris thinks they stole it then he’ll take it away.

 “I didn’t steal it!” they insist, through the pain. “It’s always been mine, it was found with me, Lady Mana’Din knows!”

 “Liar!” Elandaris accuses. He tugs at the cord, and Uthvir struggles back. A few well-placed kicks send them falling backwards, though. Despite their efforts to train their skills, the extra chores that are always being given to them take up most of the time they would spend practicing. They are behind; they know it. And they don’t have much recourse, though their heart lurches in pure alarm as they feel the ties on their leather cord finally give out.

 Elandaris seizes their treasure.

 Uthvir falls down, and trips over the dropped firewood.

 “No!” they protest, scrambling to get back up. “It’s mine, it’s not-”

 “Shut up, you little liar!” Elandaris snaps back, and lands a kick against their stomach. Uthvir grabs his leg, too desperate to back down. They scramble to try and reclaim their necklace. The defiance makes Elandaris even more furious, however, and after a moment they are both rolling through the undergrowth. Uthvir loses track of where their treasure even is, if it’s been dropped or if the older student still has it, as Elandaris gets them pinned and begins pummeling them.

 “How dare you!” he snarls. “You sneaky little thief!”

 Uthvir tries to cover their face, finally going purely on the defensive. They brace themselves for the beating.

 But Elandaris only lands a few uncoordinated hits before he suddenly stops; crying out in pain.

 Bewildered, Uthvir risk looking again.

 Elandaris is holding his hands up. But there is a large, crimson gash on the back of one of his wrists.

 “How did you do that?” he demands, shocked at the sight of his own blood. “Did you stab me?!”

 Uthvir swiftly shakes their head.

 “How could I?” they ask.

 It must be the wrong thing to say, though, because Elandaris just looks angrier. Like he thinks they must be tricking him. Uthvir only feels confused as he lefts his fists again. They brace themselves, but this time they keep watching. So they see quite clearly as his hands come down, and…

 A leaf.

 A simple leaf, being carried on a swift wind, whips by and slashes Elandaris’ hands again, before he can bring them down to hit. He lets out another cry of pain, and finally scrabbles back off of Uthvir. Bleeding from both hands.

 “What are you doing?!” he wails. “You’ve cut me! You wretch! How did you cut me?”

 “It’s not me doing it,” Uthvir tries to explain, raising placating hands. “It’s…”

 The leaves?

 They glance down to the ground, and the two unbroken, perfectly-shaped, but blood-edged leaves lying not too far away. There are techniques that can make even flower petals as sharp as darts, especially in the hands of wind practitioners, Uthvir knows. They’ve read as much as they can, when they’re able to. But in that case…

 There’s only one person who could do this sort of thing.

 If Master Thenerassan wanted to stop Elandaris, though, he could simply come and tell him to stop?

 This must be a lesson, then. Or a test. Uthvir curses their own stupidity, as they wonder what the correct response is. They never seem to know the right answer with these things. But if Master Thenerassan doesn’t want his presence to be known, then… it’s probably better not to tell Elandaris?

 Maybe Elandaris is supposed to figure things out for himself? He is also a student, after all.

 Uthvir remains silent, and the two of them fall into a wary stand-off. After a moment, they push themselves back to their feet.

 “Give me back my treasure,” they demand, helpless to let the matter go.

 Elandaris’ expression twists. He looks down, but then, to Uthvir’s growing dismay, seems to realize that he doesn’t still have it.

 “I dropped it,” he tells them. Then he lifts his chin. “Which is just lucky for you, because if I hadn’t I’d be taking it to Master Thenerassan right now, and you’d be getting kicked off the mountain for thieving.”

 Uthvir balls their fists, but doesn’t dare make a move. The corners of their eyes itch.

 “I’m not a thief!”

 For a moment, they think Elandaris is going to try and beat them some more. But there’s blood still pouring from his cuts, and the sight of it seems to make him hesitate instead. After a tense second, he turns on his heel.

 “You just wait,” he says. “I’m telling Master Thenerassan all about this anyway, about how you tried to break my feet and bloodied my poor hands. And then that’ll finally be the end of you!”

 On that note, Elandaris races off. Uthvir thinks they would be terrified of his claims, except…

 Except, Master Thenerassan must alright know. Mustn’t he?

 And he… he stopped Elandaris.

 They just feel confused, as they pause and look around. No matter how they search, though, they can’t seem to see their teacher anywhere. They give up looking for him after a minute - if he doesn’t want to be found, they don’t suppose they stand much of a chance - and instead start searching for the necklace. Their ribs and stomach and face all hurt from Elandaris’ blows, but they can’t just leave it behind. They try and retrace things, but even though they search high and low, pulling aside plants and checking around stumps, and even looking in spots that seem unlikely places, they can’t find it before the sun begins to set.

 Their treasure…

 Uthvir is so disconsolate, they finally slump on the ground, and let a few tears escape.

 “I lost it,” they whisper. “I’m so sorry…”

 They aren’t even sure who they’re apologizing to. The words just seem to fly out on their own. They take a minute to cry, holding themselves upright on shaky limbs. Before they finally sigh, and resign themselves to the truth. They still have to bring the firewood back. And now that they’ve lost so much time, they’ll probably have to spend all of tomorrow making up the difference on their chores. The ones they can’t do in the dark, anyway. They sniffle, and brush off their cheeks. Trying to dry their eyes as they finally pick up the dropped firewood, and then stagger back towards the mountain path.

 Into their pockets, they tuck a pair of blood-stained leaves.

  ~

  Thenvunin feels like he must be the worst person in the world.

 He had been surprised when his practice had been interrupted by voices. Raised in argument, by the sounds of it. For half a second he was irrationally afraid that he had been caught, and that something about his practice had been so inherently wrong that he was on the verge of being discovered. But then he’d realized the voices were further off than that. And then he’d recognized them, too.

 Uthvir and… Elandaris.

 Oh no.

 As he hurried over, Thenvunin found himself recollecting the scene he was encountering. If it was the one he suspected, anyway. The one where Elandaris stole Uthvir’s precious necklace, the only remnant of their forgotten, tragic past. The one item that could still bring warmth to their cold heart, even when they were at the height of their dark ways.

 In the original story, Uthvir had eventually regained the necklace when Elandaris died in the tournament.

 Thenvunin watches as the two students struggle through the undergrowth, though, and sees the necklace in question stuck in the middle of a nearby fern. From his angle it’s quite clearly visible. The golden shard is a bright bit of light in the dark green foliage. Most of his attention is soon caught by the fight, however, and his first impulse merits several insistent warnings from the system.

 Thenvunin’s fists clench and unclench. Thenerassan wouldn’t have stopped Uthvir’s mistreatment.

 System, how many points will I lose for just marching out there and stopping it anyway?

 <Assessing factors… likely point deduction is 40.>

 What?! 40 points? He only has sixty-five as it is! That would… that would put him so close to complete failure…

 His mouth goes dry. Is he really just going to stand here and watch this happen?

 No. No, there has to be a way to interfere. Even if he can’t stop it directly, there must be something he can do. He thinks. There’s a technique, he remembers. It was one of the cooler things about the original Thenerassan, in with all his depravity and scumbag qualities. Precision was something he was actually good at. He could whip around tiny things with enough speed and subtlety to make even the most innocuous strips of paper or blades of grass into weapons.

 Of course, the original had mostly used this to inflict secret torments on Uthvir. Thenvunin can only hope it will work in reverse, as he plucks a leaf from a nearby tree. Keeping out of sight, he lifts the leaf to mouth, and blows. The first attempt goes wide of the mark, though. Drawing in a determined breath, Thenvunin grabs another one, and tries again. As Elandaris raises his fists, Thenvunin focuses precisely on where he wants the wind to carry the leaf. He feels the energy in his body, and the energy in the world around himself. And just like that, it feels as if he is remembering how to do something, rather than learning it for the first time.

 The leaf slashes Elandaris.

 Thenvunin is a little shocked at how much blood it draws. His bullying disciple pales, shocked in turn at the sudden blow.

 Even so, Thenvunin doesn’t hesitate to send the second leaf. Uthvir looks as though they’ve been through the wringer. Elandaris finally backs off at that, but Thenvunin frowns deeply at his tirade. Already wondering how to manage that upcoming situation. He thinks he can handle it, though, so long as he focuses on Elandaris’ own misconduct. After all, the original Thenerassan would have known that Uthvir had some possessions, and that accusing them of stealing such things wouldn’t hold any water. He probably just would have been annoyed that Elandaris was wasting his time with information that he couldn’t use.

 But then he hears an ominous ding.

 <OOC Restriction Lock Violation. Point deduction, -20.>

 What?! But - but, how? It was only a couple of leaves! Neither Uthvir nor Elandaris could possibly know who sent them!

 System, I object! There’s no way that should have counted towards a deduction!

 <Assessment accuracy is at 100%.>

 But no one even knows it was me!

 <Assessment accuract is at 100%.>

 Thenvunin feels sick. 45. He’s down to 45 points now, and all he’s earned so far is 10. This is a nightmare! He keeps still, fretting over having less than half his starting points, as Uthvir begins to search around for their lost treasure. It takes him a few minutes to even register what they’re doing. And when he does, he feels another lurch in his gut.

 There, he thinks at them. Keeping his hiding place, yet trying, at the same time, to mentally project some knowledge of the necklace’s location towards them. It’s right there! Look over there, Uthvir, come on, you can find it!

 He could just pick it up and give it to them. But he absolutely can’t, he knows. The thought of losing any more points right now just makes him feel sick to his stomach. So instead he stays locked in place, while he watches Uthvir search and search, their bruises purpling from where Elandaris hit them. Do they still have healing salve left? He tries to think of ways he could get them more, at least, to keep from cracking and doing something impossibly foolish. But he feels as if he is on the verge of it anyway, when Uthvir drops to the ground and begins to cry.

 Oh, no! Thenvunin thinks, swallowing hard as his own vision goes a little blurry. Oh, no, Uthvir, it’s alright, it will be alright…

 He doesn’t know how he manages to withstand it, until Uthvir finally gathers up the firewood, and limps off alone.

 It’s only when they’re gone that he moves himself. Walking quietly over to the fern, and plucking the spirit shard necklace up from where it had been dropped.

 <Congratulations! A pivotal scene has been completed. Important Item: Uthvir’s Treasure has been obtained. +100 points awarded. Achievement: Character Development has been obtained! OOC Restriction Lock has been removed.>

 Thenvunin is so struck by relief at the sudden, unexpected points gain, that he almost doesn’t notice the necklace vanishing from his hands. But an object just vanishing is actually strange enough that it almost immediately distracts him from the bizarre rush of success.

 Wait, system! He protests. Where did it go?

 He has to get that back to Uthvir, somehow!

 <Beginner’s Tip: Important Items may be stored within the system until Participant decides to use them.>

 Thenvunin blinks.

 So… you have the necklace?

 There’s no answer, but that seems to be the correct assumption.

 System, could you please give it back?

 He’s thinking he might just be able to sneak it back into Uthvir’s possession, somehow, before he gets a response.

 <Using an Important Item at this juncture will cost 100 points. Would you like to use Item: Uthvir’s Treasure?>

 What?! Thenvunin draws in a ragged breath, and then lets out it again. He lifts up a hand to rub at his face. What sort of system even is this? He only just earned those points! And without them he’ll be down to less than half again. And will it undo his achievement? He… he can’t…

 He swallows.

 …No, he finally answers the system. He can work this out. He’ll get Uthvir their treasure back, it’ll just… take a bit longer than expected. All he has to do is earn enough points to feel comfortable, and then he can spare the 100 points needed to return it. And in the meanwhile, he can focus on making things better for them, now that he can actually act with some freedom. He’ll make it up to them later, he vows.

 …Somehow.

 The situation still seems bittersweet somehow, as he finally dusts himself off, and makes his own way back.

~

It wouldn’t be inaccurate to say that the loss of their treasure leaves Uthvir disconsolate.

 When they get back, they can’t even bring themselves to tell Squish. She just thinks Elandaris was picking on them again, and it takes a lot of effort for Uthvir to convince her not to go try and break his knees. But they’re already in enough trouble as it stands, and Elandaris has a lot more influence with Master Thenerassan than either Squish or Uthvir. Though…

 In light of what happened with the leaves, Uthvir’s not sure what to make of the situation anymore.

 Master Thenerassan doesn’t like them. They’ve known that since their first week of training, when he more or less told them so. Most of the disciples at the peak come from good families. Quiet Peak is very well-respected, and the potential to ascend to immortality and prominence is enough to catch a lot of people’s interest. Of course, not everyone has the aptitude or discipline for it. Even a prince wouldn’t be able to join the sect if he lacked the potential for training. But while Quiet Peak looks after its residents, serving the region also doesn’t exactly pay well. So all things considered, most of the applicants who get accepted come from families who have enough affluence to spare them, enough connections to actually get them there, and who also have the potential needed to be considered for training to begin with.

 Sometimes, though, masters who are out on trips will cross paths with individuals who seem to have very noteworthy potential. These people can be of all sorts of backgrounds; what matters is just that they have the makings of a good disciple. According to the tenets of Quiet Peak’s sect, there shouldn’t be any discrimination of people based on where they came from originally. Once someone sets themselves to the path of ascension, then, one’s place along that path is more pivotal to rank and influence than their birthrights or privileges.

 That’s not really how it works, though. Uthvir is one of only a few disciples with a poor background, and the only one serving Master Thenerassan. When Mana’Din had decided to offer them a place on the peak as a student, Master Thenerassan had warned Uthvir not to expect that the idealism of the tenets would shield them from reality - that someone like them, regardless of their spiritual potential, was a pity case. A servant more than a disciple, not somebody who could actually learn and achieve full mastery someday.

 Uthvir wants to, though. Even if it’s unrealistic, even if it’s impossible, they want to be strong. They can’t help but think of what they saw in the trees, before they ran into Elandaris. Master Thenerassan, moving with the wind.

 A knock on their door startles them out of their thoughts. Their arrival at the temple was unexpected, so, when they were first set up they were given an old wood shed for a room. Lady Mana’Din told them it was temporary, but they’ve been there ever since. Uthvir actually likes it, though. The thought of sleeping in the barracks, with the other disciples, makes them feel cold dread down their spine. Even if it was the same barracks as Squish, they’d probably never sleep soundly again.

 When they call out to the knock, it’s Squish who opens the door. Uthvir relaxes a little, seeing their friend coming in with some clean bandages over one arm, and a lantern in one hand.

 “It’s late,” they say.

 Squish hangs the lantern up on the hook by the door, and shakes her head.

 “I only brought a few things,” she says. “I won’t get in trouble, it’s Venavismi who’s on the evening watch tonight and he’s a soft touch.”

 Uthvir swallows, but can’t really find the energy to argue. They cause a lot of trouble for Squish. She doesn’t say so, but the others have told them often enough. Even Master Thenerassan has said so.

 “Here,” Squish says, handing them the bandages. “Do you still have that jar of salve?”

 Uthvir reaches under their blanket, and grabs the little jar to confirm it.

 Another strange thing, they think. Master Thenerassan is often scolding them for not meeting standards, but he doesn’t usually give them the means to do so, either. The salve is really good, too. Uthvir has to fight the temptation to use it all up, rationing themselves and making sure to cover up any injuries that would be visible, first. But it feels warm and smells spicy, and makes the aches fade away. Squish takes the jar from them, which has them frowning.

 “Don’t use it all,” they warn.

 “I’ll use just enough,” Squish assures them, and then sets about helping them tend their wounds.

 It’s always been like this. When Uthvir first came to the peak, Squish looked at them like she’d seen a ghost. But then afterwards, she was always helping them. Even when other people were very clear that everything Uthvir did was wrong, Squish never turned away or stuck up her nose. They could only conclude that she was the kindest person in the world.

 That made them think on the strangeness of Master Thenerassan’s behaviour again, though. So far as Uthvir could tell, no one had really changed their attitude towards them since they had arrived at the peak. Lady Mana’Din was kind, like Squish, but she also very busy. She said hello to Uthvir whenever she saw them - which wasn’t often. The other disciples were either indifferent to Uthvir, or else actively disliked them. Master Thenerassan despaired of them ever showing any talent, and was just waiting for them to make the final, crucial error that would finally let him get rid of them.

 So why had he given them the salve? Maybe he really was just sick of looking at Uthvir’s bruises and thinking they were an embarrassment. What was going on with the leaves, though? And come to think of it… there have been other things, too. The past while he hasn’t given Uthvir any chores to do. The other disciples have, but not Master Thenerassan. He hasn’t snapped or snarled at them for a while, either, or boxed their ears for speaking out of turn.

 It’s nothing really big - but it’s why Uthvir has been hopeful that they’ve been doing better.

 So… have they?

 Are things different because they’re finally getting some stuff right for a change?

 The only trouble Uthvir can find with that thought, is that they don’t think they’ve been doing anything differently. It makes them anxious not to know what they might have done right, because if they can’t figure it out, then how can they keep doing it?

 “Squish,” they ask, as she carefully applies a thin layer of salve to their bruised cheek. The tip of her tongue is pressing out, just a little bit, as she concentrates.

 “Hmm?”

 “Have you noticed anything… different, about Master Thenerassan lately?”

 Squish pauses for a moment, frowning a little. She doesn’t like their chief instructor. Uthvir knows that, although she won’t tell them why. They’re almost expecting her to just tell them that she doesn’t want to talk about ‘that man’, like usual.

 After a moment, though, her brow furrows a little bit.

 “I have, actually. He seems less…” she trails off, and makes a face like she’s trying to think of a term suitable for a student referring to their teacher.

 This is a frequent problem whenever Squish talks about Master Thenerassan.

 “Shit?” Uthvir suggests.

 Mostly to make her laugh. They’re just in the wood shed, after all.

 And it works! Squish snorts, and grins a little. Then she seems to think about it, as she goes back to applying the salve, and shakes her head.

 “Don’t say that where the others can hear. Disparaging our ‘illustrious’ teacher will just get us into trouble,” she warns.

 “I know,” Uthvir says, quietly. “I was just joking. It’s a great honour to serve someone like Master Thenerassan.”

 Squish snorts again.

 “Don’t say that, either. It makes me want to point out all of his failings instead.” Switching to their other side, she starts rubbing some salve onto the bruises there. Uthvir holds still, and fights back a wince whenever her fingers brush over and especially sensitive spot.

 “Lazy,” she mutters. “Insincere. Vain. He barely teaches, I don’t think he can take credit for the success of any of his students, even partially. He just treats us like servants, unless someone else is watching. I wish he’d fall off the peak so someone else would have to take us on instead.”

 “Squish!” Uthvir protests. “That’s ungrateful!”

 She gives them a flat look.

 “I’m incredibly ungrateful for him,” she confirms. Uthvir wants to laugh, although they know they shouldn’t. It’s mostly her tone. Well, that, and the little voice inside their head that whispers that they’ve never liked Master Thenerassan very much either.

 They used to. When they first arrived they thought he was magnificent. Regal and handsome, like a portrait of everything a master of Quiet Peak should be. That impression lasted for about five minutes.

 Then he opened his mouth.

 “But,” Squish says, tugging their shirt open to get at the bruises on their chest and stomach. Uthvir tries to stop her - they’ll waste salve - but she just bats their hands away and starts applying it anyhow. “You’re right. He does seem different, this past little while.”

 Hmm.

 So if Squish has noticed it, too, then maybe it’s not that Uthvir has actually gotten better at things?

 “Do you think he had a revelation?” they wonder.

 Their friend shrugs.

 “I don’t know. I heard he fell down and hit his head. Maybe it’s a miraculous head bump situation, like in some stories? Something knocked a negative block out of his skull that’s gone unnoticed for decades, and now he’s finally able to channel ‘niceness’ again,” she jokes.

 Uthvir gives that prospect some serious consideration, though. It might not be as silly as she’s making it sound. Oh, it wouldn’t be exactly that, obviously. But what studying Uthvir has done has taught them that spiritual energy can behave in really unpredictable ways. If it didn’t, then it would be a lot simpler for people to train and deliberately control it, cultivating it at a steady and consistent rate throughout all individuals. It would be like working with uniformly sized blocks, always knowing the measurements and therefore knowing how many you need in order to build what you want. But instead, it’s like growing a forest full of trees. You can know what kind of seeds you’re putting down, can try and get the trees to grow in certain ways, but in the end, no two forests will ever grow exactly the same.

 And Uthvir has overheard a lot of stories, from everywhere around the peak, really. Things can get very quiet, so gossip is inevitable. One of the favourite topics of all the disciples tends to be stories about bizarre things that have happened to people during training, cultivation, meditation, or combat.

 There are a lot of stories about people whose erratic behaviour, odd quirks, or particular training struggles turned out to be the cause of some kind of spiritual block that was literally ‘knocked loose’ by something hitting them, or by them falling over, or getting struck by accident. Probably the most popular story is the tale of one ancient master who fell down the temple stairs and nearly doubled his spiritual potency.

 Uthvir thinks that one might be a dirty joke in disguise, though. There are a lot of references to ‘bouncing all the way day’ in a pointed fashion that tends to provoke giggles. They think it’s a pretty tame dirty joke, in that case - but that’s beside the point. Many of the stories sound like they’re supposed to be true, even if some of them are just rumours or have all the facts jumbled up.

 “...Do you think that really could have happened, though?” they ask Squish.

 She pauses. At first she looks like she’s going to just say ‘no, of course not’, and laugh. But then her face scrunches up, as the same thought process seems to occur to her.

 “Stranger things have been known to occur,” she finally concludes.

 The whole idea makes Uthvir feel strangely hopeful, and also a little bad. Has Master Thenerassan been having difficulties this whole time, then? And no one noticed? That’s sad. Now that Uthvir thinks about it, though, it doesn’t seem like very many people are close to Master Thenerassan.

 Squish finishes up, and puts some bandages over the salve to keep it from wiping off while they sleep. Uthvir offers to walk her back to her barracks but she waves them off, and only takes the lantern with her as she finally has to go. Uthvir lets out a long breath, finally feeling the aches from their beating subside; but also keenly feeling the absence of their treasure, and its usual, subtle warmth.

 Their blanket feels cold as they settle down. They stare at the moonlight through the cracks in the wood shed door, and think it might just be easier to puzzle over the ineffable ways of their teacher, rather than dwelling on the bitter sense of loss.

  ~

  The next day proves to be a very strange one for Uthvir.

 They wake up late. Which alarms them; they must have overslept, and they have so many chores still to do, they’re bewildered and at a loss that no one kicked open their door and dragged them out to get them. The possible reasons for why that might not have happened aren’t heartening; is Master Thenerassan going to declare that they’ve been neglecting their duties, and finally kick them out?

 Is that why no one woke them? Because there’d be no point?

 Or are they going to get punished for being lazy and sleeping half the day away?

 They hurry out, hastily securing their outer tunic, before they make themselves stop and tie their belt correctly. They can’t afford any more mistakes today! They think quickly, checking the time to find that it’s past noon, and then pelt towards the kitchens. Calling apologies, only to find themselves turned hastily away from their usual scrubbing jobs - jobs they’d neglected yesterday, in all the chaos and confusion.

 “It’s alright, Uthvir,” one of the older disciples tell them. Not one of their fellows. Uthvir comes up short, full of dread rather than reassurance, even as she pats their shoulder. “We’ve got it under control. Master Thenerassan sent word not to expect you today.”

 Uthvir’s heart sinks into their stomach.

 Oh no.

 Oh no.

 What if yesterday was a test? And they failed?

 In a flurry of anxieties, they head for the stables next. But again they find themselves turned away; cordially informed not to worry, that they aren’t expected. They think they even see Elandaris inside, mucking things out with a black expression on his face. Only for a moment. Then they’re shoo’d away. As they head for the temple steps instead, they’re getting ready to plead for their life - or, well, their life at the peak at least - when someone calls out to them.

 Uthvir stops, and then drops into a polite-but-rigid bow as they see Young Master Venavismi jogging towards them.

 Venavismi is the youngest of the currently ascended masters at the peak. His duties include guarding the grounds, and…

 …And escorting unwelcome persons out of the temple.

 Uthvir feels like their doom is cheerfully jogging towards them. Some part of them just wants to run, thinking that this must be it. They’re getting kicked out. They don’t even know where they’ll go, or what they’ll do. They’ll end up on the streets, and the other disciples have been very fond of telling them exactly what sorts of things that would entail. They’re as stiff as a statue by the time Venavismi catches up with them.

 “Hey, Uthvir!” he says, jovially. “Your master wants to see you. He’s at his studies, but he asked me to keep an eye out for when you got up.”

 Uthvir swallows, and takes a minute to register what’s actually being said. In specific, they have to blink, and realize that Venavismi isn’t talking about escorting them off the mountain.

 “What?” the ask. They’d been so convinced that disaster was on the way, now that it hasn’t come, they aren’t sure how to respond.

 “Master Thenerassan wants to see you,” the older disciple repeats. His expression turns towards worry. “Are you alright, little sibling?”

 “Of course,” they say, and manage another hasty bow. They’re still probably in trouble, but maybe… maybe if they’re being talked to, first, then there’s still a chance to salvage things. “Of course, I’ll go straight away. Thank you, Elder Brother.”

 “No problem,” Venavismi assures them. He still looks concerned. “Here, let me walk you. I’m heading that way anyhow.”

 Uthvir can’t exactly dissuade him without being rude. They go with him towards Master Thenerassan’s home. At a few points they pass some of Uthvir’s fellow disciples - the dark looks they’re giving Uthvir seem amplified, and it actually makes them grateful that the guardian is with them. Even if Venavismi likes to make a lot of inane small-talk.

 “So how are your studies going?” he asks.

 “I am progressing slowly,” Uthvir admits.

 “Oh. Well, everyone usually has to go at their own pace. When I was your age, Lady Mana’Din told me that it was better to measure one’s spiritual progress against their past self, rather than their peers. Look to where you have come from where you started, rather than concerning yourself with how you stack up to the other students.”

 “That sounds very wise, thank you for the advice,” Uthvir recites politely. Their thoughts are flying all over the place, though, and in truth, they barely hear most of what Venavismi says as he chats at them. All the way past the mountain garden and over the little bridge to the familiar grounds of Master Thenerassan’s home, and then even inside, as Venavismi is the one who knocks and loudly calls out.

 “Brother! I brought your little student!” he says. “Are you still reading?”

 There’s a rustling sound from the study.

 “Yes, I’m in here. Send them in, please. Thank you,” Master Thenerassan calls back.

 Venavismi gives Uthvir a pat on the shoulder.

 “There. Go on,” he encourages.

 They steel themselves, already rehearsing apologies as they make their way into the office.

 The windows are open, Uthvir notes. And the desk has been moved. They can hear some pleasant birdsong, although everything sounds rather ominous to them under the circumstances. Swan’s Grace, Master Thenerassan’s sacred sword, is in its wall stand. Their teacher himself is sitting so that he can face the window; closing some manuals that Uthvir doesn’t recognize. A small tray of snacks is resting on the desk. Though most immortals of Master Thenerassan’s calibre don’t require food for sustenance anymore, many still eat for the pleasure of it.

 Uthvir’s empty stomach rumbles a little, and they nearly recoil from themselves in horror.

 “Sorry!” they blurt.

 Master Thenerassan raises an eyebrow.

 However, to their shock and confusion, he then slides the plate of snacks towards them. Until it’s at the edge of the desk nearest to them.

 “Have you not eaten yet, Uthvir? I didn’t think Venavismi would bring you in such a rush. Have some of this, and take a seat,” he instructs.

 Uthvir hesitates.

 Not to be disobedient, but only because they feel like this must be some kind of trap or trick. They wait too long, and they see Master Thenerassan’s smooth expression shift towards something like irritation. Or what they think must be irritation, anyway. Hastily, they do as told, before they can get scolded. They fold themselves down across from his desk, and scoop up one of the sweet powdered rolls from the plate. In such a hurry to obey that they bite into it before they think about manners, and send a scattering of crumbs down their front.

 “Sorry,” they say again, through a mouthful.

 Their cheeks burn as they realize their second slip-up.

 But Master Thenerassan just leans forward, and pointedly sets the plate of snacks directly into Uthvir’s lap.

 “There,” he says. “No need to get crumbs anywhere, I had my fill of those anyway.”

 Uthvir swallows. Their mouth feels dry with terror and confusion, but asking for a glass of water at this point would be beyond idiocy. They feel like they should refuse the offer, to be obligingly polite and deferential, but Master Thenerassan hasn’t really give them room to. He regards them strangely for a moment. Unsure of how to react, they take a more careful bite of the powdered roll, with care to make sure all the crumbs on their shirt land on the plate.

 Master Thenerassan pulls a fan from his sleeve, and opens it. He lets out a long breath, and leans back. It looks as if he might be deciding something. Uthvir can’t escape the thought that he is, in fact, deciding their future.

 Their fate.

 “Uthvir,” he finally says, after what seems like a small eternity. The sweet roll tastes like ash in their mouth. “I owe you an apology. I have been a negligent instructor.”

 To Uthvir, Thenerassan’s words sound incredibly ominous. Like the beginning of a speech that starts with ‘I have failed you as a teacher’ and ends with ‘you are no longer going to be my student’. They swallow, and fight back a cough, and put aside the plate in their lap to drop into the lowest bow they can manage.

 “Master Thenerassan, please, you are the greatest instructor I could ever ask for!” they say. “I’m sorry I slept in. I didn’t mean to. I won’t make excuses, but I would never let it happen again, it wasn’t my intention-”

 “Uthvir, stop, stop,” Master Thenerassan gently interrupts. They look up to find him motioning at them.

 Warily, Uthvir straightens back up again.

 The smile he gives them makes them feel even more lost at sea.

 “I am not angry with you, Uthvir,” he says, firmly. “You are not in any trouble. On the contrary, if anyone should be punished, it should be the Master Thenerassan who has taught you these past few years. He has done disgracefully. And so, some things around here are now going to change.”

 Uthvir blinks.

 They are utterly lost. What is going on? What is this leading to? Is it a test? A trap?

 Master Thenerassan looks at them strangely again. Then he sighs, and puts his fan up to hide some of his expression once more.

 “The other students have been mistreating you,” their teacher asserts.

 Uthvir automatically shakes their head in denial.

 “Yes, they have been,” Master Thenerassan says, firmly. Angrily, they think. They swallow and duck their head. What’s going on? What are the right answers? For the past few years they haven’t ever been a favoured pupil, but they thought that they had at least figured out how to manage certain interactions. There were patterns that they could predict; that made it easier, even if it always seemed to end in something unpleasant for them anyway.

 But now all those patterns are gone.

 “I will not permit it to continue,” Master Thenerassan says.

 Uthvir bites the inside of their cheek, and keep their gaze averted. So are they being sent away, then? To stop it from continuing?

 Another long sigh reaches them.

 “...In a few days, Uthvir, I will be making a personal journey to attend to my health. While I am away, I do not think it would be very wise to leave you disciples under Elandaris’ charge. I know he is the senior among you, and that is ordinarily what I would do, but… I, ah. Have been burdening him with too much responsibility.”

 Uthvir blinks. The memory of blood-stained leaves beats through the panic in their mind.

 Tentatively, they look up at their teacher. But Master Thenerassan is holding his fan, still.

 Health? They wonder. Immortals don’t really get sick, but there are things that can injure, poison, or otherwise impeded them in ways similar to illnesses. And spiritual ailments can happen too, of course.

 Does this have something to do with his odd behaviour? And his fall? Is… were they and Squish actually right?

 But then, Uthvir thinks, maybe he’s going to reverse the process? Maybe he didn’t accidentally remove a block. Maybe he just addled his skull a little. They feel guilty for thinking that sort of thing could make an improvement on the man.

 Although… maybe Elandaris just did something to make him really angry? Maybe this isn’t about Uthvir doing better, but Elandaris doing worse?

 Master Thenerassan carries on, heedless of their thoughts and speculation.

 “Obviously, I cannot simply leave the training of my disciples to the wolves for several weeks. But it would be too much to burden any one Sibling of the peak with handling all of you. So I have made arrangements for you all to attend different teachers, while I am gone. They have generously loaned some of their time for this cause. I will tell everyone, of course, but for now you can know that you and Desire will be answering to Master Venavismi while I’m away.”

 Uthvir blinks.

 Venavismi?

 That’s… not bad? And they’re serving with Squish? Master Thenerassan put them together on purpose?

 “Oh,” is all they can manage at first, in their surprise. Then they remember their manners, and duck their head. “Thank you very much, Teacher.”

 “Hm. You should thank Master Venavismi for his time, but don’t worry about thanking me,” Master Thenerassan says. “All you need to do is make sure you go to him and tell him if anyone is bothering you. It is not good for the other disciples to shirk their duties onto you. Chores are distributed throughout the peak as part of training. Every disciple must learn how to balance the necessities of daily life with the pursuit of loftier goals. But right now, things are unbalanced. Uthvir does all of the chores, and barely has time to focus on their spiritual cultivation and practice. The others do none of the chores, and do not build up their characters. So don’t think you’re doing them any favours by keeping quiet about their mistreatment towards you.”

 Uthvir’s eyes are wide.

 Again, they flounder. Not knowing what to say. But the habit of thinking that if there’s a problem, then they must be to blame for it, is an old standby. They immediately start offering apologies again; and rendered uncertain, again, when Master Thenerassan makes them stop that.

 “You are not in trouble,” their teacher reiterates.

 “But I… hurt their training?” they venture. Isn’t that what they’re getting at?

 Master Thenerassan looks vexed.

 “No, Uthvir. I am saying that they have hurt your training, as well as their own. And that I have failed you by letting this go on so long,” he declares.

 Uthvir feels like someone just opened up the floor underneath them. They stare blankly ahead, and then blink a few times.

 They… he… what?

 “...Really?” they venture at last.

 Master Thenerassan’s expression vanishes behind a wave of his fan again.

 “Really,” he says, in a tone that brooks no argument. “But it falls to me, now, to try and fix this. That will take us some time, I fear. And some things cannot be endured; you can no longer sleep in that filthy wood shed, for starters.”

 “I don’t mind it!” Uthvir insists, hastily. Please, no, not the barracks…

 “The barracks are also unacceptable, in your case,” Master Thenerassan tells them. As if he could read their mind. They wobble in place a little, still missing the floor. Except, bit by bit, they’re starting to wonder if they’re floating rather than sinking. If this is a good feeling, rather than a bad one.

 “Fortunately, there is a room by my garden that I do not use,” their teacher continues. “It has its own door to the outside, so there is no need for us to disturb one another. I’ll expect you to have your things moved over there by the end of today. Otherwise, you should focus on your studies until I leave. There will be no more chores until Master Venavismi assigns you some, after I have gone, to try and make up for some of the imbalanced time.”

 Uthvir stares.

 …What?

 As Master Thenerassan looks back at them expectantly, they remember themselves yet again. Dropping into another hasty bow.

 “That is too kind!” they insist.

 “I think I have explained why it is not,” Master Thenerassan retorts, quietly. Almost more to himself than to him, they think. Before they can think of how to respond, he motions at them to sit up again, using his fan to gesture. “Stop bowing. And finish that plate of food, you are much too malnourished. I have some training manuals for you and Desire, I expect you to give hers to her before I go. Master Venavismi will give you guidance if you need it, but I should still point you in the right direction, so I expect you both to read these manuals while I am gone…”

 Uthvir listens. They really do, even though it also still feels like they’re floating away in shock and confusion. They sit in Master Thenerassan’s office, and eat sweets, and listen to birds, and are given two crisp new manuals to tuck under their arm, and a key to a room that leads onto Master Thenerassan’s own garden. They try the shed, first, thinking that makes more sense, but no. The key doesn’t fit there. Instead it opens a door to a quiet little space that looks like it was originally meant to be a meditation room. Uthvir doesn’t know why Master Thenerassan would dislike it enough to not use it; there is a lot of pleasant light and fresh scents from the garden. But someone has put a new bedroll into the corner, along with a chest for keeping clothes in.

 Uthvir leaves in a daze to go and get their things. It doesn’t take long, they don’t have very much. The little room still seems sparse and empty as they set down their blanket and put away their spare uniform, and use the extra drawers to hold all their training material and their little tin of healing salve.

 Moving their belongings reminds them of what’s missing from the count of items.

 It’s a sad thing in with several confusing-but-ostensibly-good things. So Uthvir’s not sure how it works out that they end up sitting on their blanket in a corner of the strange room, with their knees up their chest, crying as quietly as they can.

 And when they’ve finished, they feel tired all over again. Even though they overslept already. Their bones feel hollowed out, and the lack of comforting weight at their neck still seems wrong, but… but, as they settle their damp cheeks against their knees, a wave of relief washes over them. It feels the same way that the air does after a storm has broken. And so, with instinctive desire, and a strange sense of balance, they fold themselves into a meditative pose and settle more deliberately into their corner. Closing their eyes as they focus on their breathing, and then on the flow of their spiritual energy.

 Their teacher instructed them to practice.

 Even if nothing else makes sense, Uthvir supposes that this, at least, probably should.

  ~

  Thenvunin can’t help but fretting, when the day actually arrives for him to leave and head for the caves.

 It still seems like a good plan. Or maybe just the best he can come up with. But there seem to be endless complications to everything. He had assumed things would get simpler once he wasn’t getting ‘dinged’ by the OOC Lock anymore - and in a sense, that really is a benefit. What he’d failed to consider, though, was that there might still be consequences for acting ‘strangely’.

 Case in point - the first morning after the lock had worn off, no less than three of the original Thenerassan’s colleagues had asked if he was ‘feeling alright’. Master Tasallir had looked at him as if he might be having some kind of manic episode, one of the peak’s healers had just ‘swung by’ to check on the currents of his spiritual energy, and then Uthvir had seemed positively terrified during a simple interview where all he tried to do was fix their bullying issue and move them to a better place to sleep at night.

 He had scared them witless and he didn’t even know how.

 They still seem uncertain around him. Thenvunin has been giving them space - and that hasn’t been hard, at the end of the day. He has plenty to deal with in trying to wrangle the other disciples at the moment, who are even more confused that their ‘teacher’ has started behaving differently. At least that makes some sense, though, because Thenvunin isn’t particularly trying to be nice to them.

 Oh, he’s not being cruel. But being ‘too nice’ to Squish reads in a way that makes his skin crawl, considering the Original Thenerassan’s ‘niceness’ towards her. And as for his bully students, well, obviously there’s a need to backtrack on some of the damage that’s been done to their values and discipline. Which means actually punishing them for being vicious little beasts.

 Thenvunin’s never been a teacher. He went to school, once, for about four years when his health was good. Otherwise it was all homeschooling. So he even finds himself pouring through the Original Thenerassan’s notes, not because he thinks it would be a good thing to emulate the man on a lot of things, but because it… at least gives him an idea of what he’s working with? And what the general structure of things should maybe look like. Unfortunately, most of the Original’s notes just read like the diary entries of some kind of madcap social climber. Who has good connections, who has money, who has relatives who’ve ascended, and things like that.

 Otherwise, he didn’t seem to bother with a lot of necessary work.

 Thenvunin ends up going to Master Tasallir, who is an ascended scribe and the person in charge of the peak’s records and archives, and mustering up an excuse of losing some of his teaching materials in order to access back-up records in the archives. Tasallir still seems to think he might be deranged, but less than he had before, when Thenvunin had attempted to offer him an actual friendly greeting.

 The man does make him nervous, though. He can’t even remember reading about him from the original book, and yet for some reason he is… unreasonably good-looking? Like someone cast him out of precious metals and ivory and then brought him to life via wishes. He is quite possibly the most meticulously groomed person Thenvunin has seen on the entire peak, which is saying something, and every time her speaks to Thenvunin he looks like someone has jammed half a lemon in his mouth.

 Thenvunin cannot take it personally. He thinks he would look the same way at the Original Thenerassan, and has no idea what sorts of transgressions his alter-ego might have committed before Thenvunin pulled a body snatch on him.

 But the long and short of it is that he spends several days running around in a mad panic, earning no points and feeling as if he is somehow just making everything worse, as he tries to actually teach his students and beseeches the other mentors at the peak for assistance and is perpetually asked if his ‘spiritual equilibrium’ is alright.

 So on balance, despite his nervousness over leaving - and what could go wrong in his absence, if that little villain Elandaris gets his hands on Uthvir again - he thinks the trip will be good.

 He can study, He can practice his abilities. He can make plans. He can come back, and hope that any major shifts in his ‘general temperament’ might be attributed to a successful trip; like the way some people seem to come back from vacations with entirely new outlooks on life. Or maybe, if he gives them a few days, people will start to forget what the Original was really like. Even just a little bit.

 …That’s a long shot, but he can hope.

 One silver lining to the whole scenario that he hadn’t even anticipated is that, since he is going to a section of the sacred caves that is not typically used by Quiet Peak, Lady Mana’Din gives him a map of the cave system with his path outlined for him. She also gives him a special pass key, which is little more than a strip of paper with a password written on it. But when Thenvunin presents it to the waterfall opening of the cave system, the water parts, and the entrance is revealed to him; and every other path along the way is also opened by his innocuous-seeming strip of paper.

 Thenvunin begins to feel some unease about the situation as he makes his way to the cavern system of Battle Peak.

 He’s never been in a cave before. Only really seen them on television and in movies, which doesn’t really do the darkness of them justice. Not that there’s no light; openings up towards the surface let in bright shafts of daylight, but any time a cloud rolls past them, they darken. And there are some lanterns, but still, they don’t illuminate everything. Many passageways seem shrouded in a deep darkness, and the darkness feels strange to him.

 Old, somehow.

 It reminds him of the practice that some peaks have of binding cursed spirits and demons beneath mountains. Like the dungeons below a castle. Thenvunin does not see anything, or hear anything, or even feel anything more than the odd sense of the ‘energy’ in the place. There are pools of calm, and waterfalls of light, and there are small bodies of still water - clear, somehow - and there is darkness.

 Only the darkness bothers him, until he thinks about how much time he is going to be spending here.

 Then he is very glad that he brought along so many books.

 Every so often he passes a cave that he suspects is occupied, but he doesn’t see any occupants until he gets to the segment of the map that marks the Battle Peak system. He doesn’t get lost or turned around too many times, thankfully. The caves are supposed to be a ‘natural’ place, but they do still have markers for the pilgrims that come.

 When Thenvunin is the Battle Peak system, he passes by a small chamber. Filled, unexpectedly, with daylight. An unfamiliar figure mediates in the middle of the room. They do not seem to take note of Thenvunin’s passage, and after a while, he decides it would be best just to leave them to their self-reflection.

 Other than that, he doesn’t see anyone until he’s actually made it to the cavern allotted to him.

 The space is something of a relief. Though it’s still obviously a cave, it has light. Not as much as the one he saw the meditating disciple in, but enough to give him a glimpse of the sky through the high opening. Water trickles down one side of the cavern wall, and some moss is growing around the opening. Thenvunin can feel the air move a little.

 It startles him, how much of a relief that is. Like a friendly touch that he had missed without knowing, ever since he came inside the caves. He moves to the middle of the chamber, and takes a deep breath. Spreading his arms out and feeling the air across his face.

 I can do this.

 Though after a moment, it occurs to him that he isn’t entirely sure how to start.

 The meditation he witnessed earlier rises in his memory, and after a moment, he supposes that’s as good a place to begin as any. He sets the bag he brought into a corner of the cave - Master Venavismi had blinked at the sight of it before he left, asking if it wasn’t traditional to take nothing at all; but Thenvunin managed to say it was only for the trip - and then he settles in a good spot to feel the breeze, and begins.

 Once he starts in on things, he finds that, like with the leaves he had thrown at Elandaris, many things are more like waking up a memory than trying to attempt something new. Even though Thenvunin is sure he’s never done any of them before. He manages to pass several hours without feeling like he’s been in a hard stone cave for that long; not noticing the memory of hunger, or feeling pain from the cold stone floor. He alternates between mediation and cultivation, practice and pondering. He takes breaks to read some of the manuals he brought and makes notes, and notices the light changing from day to night, before the habit of sleeping catches up with him.

 But that just leaves him feeling antsy and uncertain. And in too much darkness to read anymore.

 Sounds from one of the other chambers draws his attention. Thenvunin considers that it might be wise to watch some of the other disciples here, to see what they’re doing. To figure out what he should be doing. He gets up, and dusts himself off, and heads back out of the chamber. A little wandering leads him to a side passage, that descends right down next to the cavern he was in. That’s where the sounds seem to be coming from, along with the steady trickle of running water. He makes his way down, hesitating when the distant lantern light fades, and he has to proceed in darkness. But it only lasts for a short while, before he sees a light at the end of the passage.

 The sounds become clearer. It sounds like someone… groaning? Sparring, perhaps? Thenvunin almost thinks for half a second that he’s about to walk in on something inappropriate instead, with the heavy nature of the panting that he hears, but… serious disciples of Battle Peak wouldn’t use the sacred caves for trysts, would they?

 That would be too scandalous!

 Thenvunin’s face feels hot at the thought, and he’s definitely hoping he doesn’t see anything untoward at all as he reaches the bottom, and takes a look around.

 The first thing he notes is that there is only one person in the chamber. It’s a wide space, bigger than the one he had been in, but with more dark patches. A lone disciple is standing just off to one side, with his back towards the passage. His shoulders are hunched; and he is the source of the heavy breaths.

 Thenvunin hesitates. Something niggles at the back of his mind, a sense of something he should know, but also a rush of reflexive worry. Thoughts of being in hospitals, of seeing other sick and injured and struggling people.

 This man is unwell?

 And then the system provides him with a name, hovering in text just below the stranger’s shoulder. Like a caption in a film.

 <Battle Peak Champion: Master Calain>

 Thenvunin freezes.

 All the colour drains out of his face as sudden recognition dawns.

 Oh no. Oh no. No, he remembers this now! From when the original Thenerassan was discredited in the story! Battle Peak’s champion was Thenerassan’s rival while they were students, serving under the same teacher. They had bitterly despised one another, and Thenerassan had nursed a grudge ever since the fallout of their constant fighting had seen their teacher hand his tutelage over to Mana’Din at Quiet Peak, in order to separate them. Bitterness at being the one chosen to leave rather than stay, Thenvunin had assumed.

 A spark of hatred that had bloomed into an opportunistic murder, when Thenerassan had gone to the sacred caves for self-reflection, and found Calain lost to the haze of spiritual imbalance. A training method gone badly awry. At the time, the murder was considered self-defense; Calain had lashed out and in defending himself, Thenerassan had killed him by mistake. But as the black marks on his reputation grew, it became clear that the murder was deliberate. Calain’s state only provided a plausible excuse.

 And Master Calain’s sister was a member of Uthvir’s harem. One of their favourite wives, even. So of course, Uthvir had taken great care to avenge the death of her brother, along with every other payment they drew from Thenerassan’s blood.

 I can’t be here, Thenvunin thinks, all at once. He turns to leave but in his hurry, and the dark, a loose pebble flies away from his shoe.

 Calain turns. Ragged and wild, like an animal. Thenvunin feels a rush of shock as he sees his skin mottled with darkness, as if covered in dozens of bruises. He can scarcely take in anything else about the man, as fear overwhelms him, and he moves to keep running.

 Calain makes a sharp motion. There’s a flash of warning. Reflexes alone save Thenvunin as he leaps back, and barely avoids the sword that cuts across his path.

 <Dawn’s Radiance>, the system helpfully tags it.

 I don’t care about the names of swords right now! What am I supposed to do?! Thenvunin wonders back. He doesn’t get an answer, isn’t even really expecting anything that helpful, before Calain roars at him and charges. His sword whipping through the air and flying to his hand, as his eyes gleam with wild, erratic energy.

 Thenvunin flees in the opposite direction.

 “Calain!” he tries, as the two of them begin to race in circles around the chamber. “Calain, it’s me, Thenvunin!”

 “I’LL KILL YOU!” Calain roars.

 Right, yes, no, the Original Thenerassan may have known him but they weren’t on good terms. Familiarity isn’t going to help. Thenvunin keeps running, and dodging the occasional onslaughts of Calain’s sword, as he tries desperately to think. I need to get help!

 He attempts to turn back up the passageway, but the sword blocks his path. And then it cuts towards him, and in a sudden, vivid moment of clarity, Thenvunin knows that if he doesn’t do exactly the right thing right this second, he is going to be speared on that blade.

 Before he can really think about it, about what he knows or what he can or can’t do, he turns, and in a smooth motion, draws Swan’s Grace.

 The blocking move comes effortlessly. Calain’s sword strikes against his own with enough force to push him backwards, but even though there’s a ton of energy behind it, it’s erratic and unfocused. Thenvunin narrows his eyes, and in a sharp, deliberate gesture, knocks the weapon out of the grasp of Calain’s distorted spiritual energy, and sends it clattering across the chamber.

 Right in time for the weapon’s owner to charge him like a zombie from a horror film.

 Thenvunin’s ready, though. He feels impossibly calm - like he’s floating out of this body again, like he’s just a director telling it what they need to accomplish - as he turns the flat of his blade to deflect part of Calain’s charge, and then smashes a palm up the underside of his jaw. The energy around them ripples, and Thenvunin’s own bats his attacker away with a rush of wind that howls through the chamber.

 Calain smacks against the cavern wall; Thenvunin immobilizes him quickly, enabled mostly, he thinks, but the pure chaos of the other man’s aura, and the incoherence of his intentions. He sits on his back to hold him down, while Calain bucks, and keeps Swan’s Grace ready to deflect in case he should manage to summon his sword again.

 But then, reality sinks back in, and Thenvunin is once again at a loss.

 What… what he should do?

 He can’t hold Calain down forever. But he can’t kill him, either. Even if it weren’t for the situation with Uthvir later on, Thenvunin’s never killed a person before. Trying to tell himself that Calain’s only a fictional character doesn’t seem to work very well. Not when he’s spasming and struggling like a very real, ill man, caught in some kind of terrible seizure.

 “Help!” he tries calling. “We need assistance! Is anyone there?”

 He thinks he hears something, or maybe a few things. But minutes pass and Calain is getting harder to restrain, and the bruising on his skin is looking worse by the minute, unless that’s just Thenvunin’s imagination. But it seems almost like… like he’s changing. Like the imbalance is…

 Oh.

 Oh, no. He remembers now. Imbalance one’s energies bad enough, and death can result. Calain body is being destroyed by the energies inside of it. Like a cancer.

 But as Thenvunin remembers that, he also finds himself remembering something else. One of Uthvir’s wives went through something similar, didn’t she? Sabotaged in her training by a rival. But Uthvir saved her. In the sort of novel that Immortal Demon Way was, not saving their own wife wouldn’t have fit the power fantasy bill. So Uthvir had used their own spiritual equilibrium to restore hers. Thenvunin even remembers the description of the technique, although he also recalls it being described as very dangerous and liable to damage both parties if it backfires…

 It’s seeing Calain spit up a mouthful of blood that finally makes up his mind.

 “For the record, I’ve never done this before. So if it doesn’t work, I am sincerely trying,” he says.

 Then he summons up his focus, and presses his fingers to specific points on Calain’s back. Digging in, and mustering up the energy he needs, and feeling out what the over-abundance of energy in the other man is. Then he starts channeling in a counter-balance from his own stores.

 It feels strange. Like bleeding, almost, but not quite. Thenvunin’s arms tingle and his focus blurs a little. But he takes calm, steady breaths. If there’s one thing he does know, it’s how it feels when something’s going wrong in his body. And this feels tiring, and risky, but not like he’s committed a disaster yet. A soft glow emanates from his touch. He’s so focused, that he doesn’t notice when Calain stops struggling.

 He does notice when the mottling on his skin begins to fade, though.

 Thenvunin keeps up the process until he feels like he’s starting to lose his own balance. And then he finally pulls his hand away, and stops.

 There’s a long moment of utter silence.

 Then the system chimes in.

 <Congratulations! You have successfully completed a character quest. +50.>

 Fifty points? Just fifty, for all that? Thenvunin doesn’t know if he’s more surprised that he got anything at all, or offended that this was somehow worth fewer points than just stealing poor Uthvir’s treasured necklace.

 Calain turns, and looks at him with eyes that seem bloodshot, but otherwise normal.

 “What?” he says. “Thenvunin?”

 He sounds simultaneously offended and bewildered. Thenvunin figures he can let the other man go, now, and does. Only starting to release him before Calain is shoving him off in return, and moving warily away from him.

 Thenvunin folds his arms, unable to fight back his annoyance. It might be understandable that almost everyone hates him, here, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t getting sick of it, too.

 “What’s that look for?” he demands. “I just saved your life! That was a risky move, you know. I’ve never done anything like that before. And you were trying to kill me the entire time, too!”

 Calain’s brow furrows. He looks confused.

 Thenvunin curses his luck.

 “Oh please don’t tell me you have short-term memory loss?” he snaps. That would be his luck, wouldn’t it?

 The comment seems to smooth out some of Calain’s features, though. The other man extends one arm outward, and Dawn’s Radiance flies back into it. Thenvunin stiffens; but after a second, Calain only sheaths the blade back at his hip.

 “I remember,” he says, clipped and obviously still wary.

 The two of them stare one another down.

 “...Why?” Calain finally asks, breaking the silence.

 Thenvunin straightens out his clothes, which had been sent somewhat askew by the fight, and hesitates on how to reply.

 “Why what?” he asks, in the end.

 It just seems to make Calain more annoyed, though.

 The effect is somewhat undermined by the fact that the man is bizarrely pretty, though. Thenvunin is beginning to wonder what’s going on with that. When he read the book, he had sort of imagined Master Calain as being a rugged, muscles-upon-muscles, thick-and-hairy warrior type. Barrel-chested and stocky and square-jawed, the sort of man who fought bears under waterfalls. But on reflection, he supposed that the man’s reputation had been described more than his looks. And his sister, Calantha, was a remarkable beauty; dainty and fair, and actually described in an atypical amount of physical detail.

 On that reflection, Thenvunin realizes that Calain looks essentially like a male version of her. He’s still obviously fit and broad-shouldered, taller than Thenvunin himself. But he’s delicate-looking too, with a princely sort of countenance. A pretty face, long eyelashes, soft mouth…

 The contrast between expectation and reality is a little unnerving.

 Still. Calain is glaring, and he does at least have the eyebrows to pull that off.

 “Why would you do that?” he asks, looking Thenvunin up and down. As if he’s half expecting some vipers to suddenly come soaring out of his pockets or something.

 Thenvunin sighs, internally, and reminds himself that there’s no point in getting annoyed. People are just going to be suspicious. The only person to blame for it isn’t here, because Thenvunin has taken his place.

 “I’ve been… thinking about a lot of things,” he says. “Things I regret. About the past. About who I’ve been. I don’t want to be that person anymore, Calain. I’m trying to bury the Thenvunin Thenerassan you knew, and do a better job with the future than he ever would have. I would like to turn over a new leaf.”

 Calain looks suspicious, still.

 After a few more minutes of staring contests, Thenvunin gives up. He feels bad, now. Tired. Here he was supposed to be building up his spiritual energy, and now he’s set himself back instead. Not that he regrets it. After a moment he finds himself looking Calain over again, and while the other man may still be expecting some kind of trick…

 Thenvunin just saved his life.

 Maybe he can be proud of that, even if no one else is?

 “I’m in the cave at the top of the passage,” he mentions, gesturing. “If you run into difficulties again, come and find me.”

 Calain’s expression wavers, while Thenvunin starts to head up. It’s only then that he finally hears the sound of voices calling. Battle Peak disciples approaching from the opposite end of Calain’s chamber, by the sounds of it. After a moment of considering, Thenvunin just decides to keep going. Let them look after Calain, now. They’re his colleagues and he’s probably more comfortable with that anyway.

 After a while he hears Calain finally turn and answer the calls, and then the voices move further than Thenvunin can properly hear. He finishes making his way back up the passage, and heads into his own cavern again. Settling down, reviewing the last manual he read, and focusing on figuring out just what all he did to himself, and how he should probably reverse it.

 It’s good practice, he tells himself.

 Come morning, he has changed his mind entirely. Exerting that much energy in such a strange way was absolutely not worth it. He should have just killed Calain. Maybe this sadistic system would have given him more points. Probably, he thinks. And then he wouldn’t be feeling like someone filled his head with bees and tied all of his muscles into knots.

 The second day he gives up on progressing a few times in favour of just quietly weeping in the corner of his cavern.

 Eventually, though, Thenvunin finds himself getting back on track. The buzzing in his skull abates, and he manages to smooth out all the aches in his own body, with a deliberateness that makes him envious even while he’s doing it. If only he could have done this while he was alive! Just - fix himself! Heal himself, oh, that would have been a dream come true. The number of nights he had spent awake wishing he could just will his bones better…

 It makes him a little emotionally unbalanced. He has to start some things over again, and switches to sword practice for a while instead.

 A few times, he thinks about going to check on Calain. But he hears no more strange noises, and after a while, he decides against it. He doesn’t want to jinx it, he managed to get away without killing the man this time, but what if testing his luck just means he ends up doing the whole thing over again?

 Sometimes he can tell, without really seeing, that there are other disciples moving around the caves. But mostly, things just stay quiet, and never sees anyone. Hears things, feels things, but doesn’t see things. He forces himself to put his attention to what he needs to do, what he came for. After a while he loses track of time entirely, but, he still has a strong sense that he should stay put for now.

 Until, one evening, he abruptly finds that he doesn’t anymore.

 Time to go.

 Without sparing much thought to question it, Thenvunin gathers up his things. He hesitates, warring with himself over it; but then he turns towards the passageway leading down to the big chamber. It’s still daylight outside the caves, and that makes him feel bolder, even though it doesn’t change the light levels in the passage any.

 When he makes his way down, he sees Calain sitting on a flattened stone in the chamber. Eyes closed.

 “Brother,” he calls. “I’m leaving. Just so you know. Good luck with the rest of your endeavours.”

 It would have been irresponsible, Thenvunin thinks, to just leave without letting the man know that a potential source of help had gone.

 Calain doesn’t give any acknowledgement of having heard him or not.

 After a minute, Thenvunin can’t help but sniff in annoyance. Muttering a little to himself about rude people and ingrates before turning on his heel and making his way all the way back up that damn passage again, before consulting his map to find the quickest route out.

 Once he’s out, getting back to Quiet Peak will be simpler than leaving it. He can just use his energy to fly his way there on his sword. A genre trope that always seemed a little odd to him, but when he tested it out during one of his attempts to master a few basic abilities, he suddenly discovered the appeal.

 Of flying, at least.

 The map leads him to an opening that heads straight up and out of a wide side passage. Thenvunin takes it, and lets out an audible sigh of relief as he finally comes clear of the cavern rock and breaks out into the trees and open air again. A slightly frigid wind blowing past him, carrying just the faintest hints of snow, while the trees sway. He lets his energy carry him up above the tops of them, as he stretches his arms out again.

 That was a success, he thinks. He does feel somewhat better about himself and his abilities now. Even if that whole debacle with Calain still feels vaguely traumatic.

 He turns towards Quiet Peak…

 …And halts, going cold all over again.

 Flames lick upwards from the direction of the temple. While the sky towards the opposite horizon is grey, closer to the peak, the air shimmers with an eerie red light. The next gust of wind that blows his way carries ash instead of snow, and right as he sees it, he hears the first distant chime of the temple’s alarm bells.

 He forgot.

 How could he forget?!

 The attack! The attack on the temple, when Uthvir was fifteen. One of the most formative moments in Uthvir’s pre-Hell development, one of the first ‘big’ fights, a pivotal moment before the tournament that actually seemed to make the story really kick off the ground.

 The attack!

 Demons have come to Quiet Peak.

[sabgyupsal]

Sabrina Culture is:

- having irregular sleep schedules (may or may not be caused by the ff: anxiety, depression, cramming, waking up just to write about thoughts, binging tv series with brothers, drawing)

- either replying really fast or taking a week to reply, there is no in between

- high-waisted pants

- tucked in shirts

- big feet and I have to juggle between sizes 8 - 9

- not going to do something because it might mildly inconvenience the other person (like needing help in class but staying quiet instead like a dumbass)

- high levels of anxiety when turning on the stove at home bc it might burst into flames and engulf me

- high levels of anxiety when plugging something into an electrical socket bc it might spark and ground me

- falling asleep easily on transportation

- falling asleep on trains while standing up

- motion sickness when riding taxis or cars

- never ever having the guts to try spicy food I’ve never heard of before

- short hair

- having depressive episodes that last from hours to months and feeling random spikes of being happy?? in between

- impulsive bitch

- yellow

- Van Gogh enthusiasm

- Gustav Klimt enthusiasm

- inconsistent art style

- possession of sketch books that have been around since 5 years ago just to do redraws

- draws the same damn OCs every time

- listens to Kali Uchis and Lorde on really bad days

- repeats Melodrama multiple times in a day yet still doesn’t know all the lyrics to all the songs

- Melodrama > Pure Heroine

- crybaby

- has been a sensitive melodramatic ass since birth, parents can confirm

- fighting people in my head

- wanting to buy knuckle rings but is afraid the metal detectors at the train stations will go off on them

- will have a bad image of you if you litter shit anywhere else but the garbage can

- will have a bad image of you if you spit on the street randomly

- English as a first language

- having a face so asymmetrical that if you half my face you will get two different looks (my eyebrows have different lengths, my right eye is bigger, my nose slants to the right, my jaw slants to the right, my ears are differently shaped, and even my hairline is a lopsided crow’s peak)

- having extra bones on the sides of my feet

- anime hands

- long nails

- having a ring on my left hand given to me 10 years ago by my mom but everyone keeps asking if it’s from a boyfriend

- wanting to be goth/punk but even my friends do not support it

- glasses

- having a long-ass name and being asked if I ever had difficulty during childhood in writing it

- being told that my name is really long and being asked the reason why

- actually likes all colors of the rainbow and those outside the rainbow but is really always associated with yellow bc it’s the most flattering color for my skin and hair

- being told that I’m pale

- being pale

- gets cold easily

- eats like a bird

- fluctuating weight due to bad dietary habits and stress issues

- growing fat and then being told to lose weight

- losing weight and then being told to grow fat

- history of fainting due to anxiety, dysmenorrhea, heat stroke, or poor health

- losing sense of time at random moments and it feels like I’m outside my body?? idk haha what is this

- not knowing how to ride a bike bc I was scared every time I tried it

- never in a serious relationship before

- despite being 19 is still not allowed to have a relationship

- despite being 19 is still not allowed to go out and drink

- despite being 19 is still not allowed to work part time to help parents with their expenses on my tuition

- can express better through art than through words

- can feel more emotions through visual art than through words

- Not Good Enough

- in need of constant validation bc I’m such an annoying and desperate dumb bitch :(

- never wants to tell a lie!! (does it in some cases to keep secrets and such)

- transient feelings if there’s a whopping amount of uncertainty

- does not get too excited when meeting a guy who ticks all the boxes for my ideal guy bc I don’t like idealizing people

- not being a sapiosexual bc I have been around a lot of intelligent people who are pretentious assholes and bullies

- personality > intelligence

- anime

- being able to read people easily while others are complaining that I am hard to read

- quiet when upset

- quiet when depressed

- sometimes quiet when anxious, sometimes panicky

- first panic attack landed me in the hospital

- having a lot of things my friends don’t know about me bc I never felt it was important to bring them up or to be open about it

- seasonal affective

- crying when full of anger bc it’s so overwhelming

- avoiding being angry so I won’t have to cry like a bitch

- recovers slow from sicknesses (physical and mental)

- weak immune system

- being constantly told how I almost DIED at five years old due to dengue fever

- feeling the spooks but not seeing them

- vivid storytelling

- memory problems

- retelling stories bc I constantly forget that I already told those stories

- not remembering a lot of important things under stress

- being deathly scared I am going to have Alzheimer’s in the future :(

- myopic

- looking like a snobby bitch when that is just my normal face

- friendzoning bc I mistakenly led people on when I thought they were just being polite

- slow when it comes to matters of the heart

- only believing someone likes me when I hear it directly from them

- feels guilt and shame when accidentally destroying friendships by friendzoning

- thinks about every? damn? thing???

- goes to the extremes to not be publicly humiliated and will sometimes cry out of shame even if it was done in jest

- fighting back tears when a friend cries

- believing that my personality was never my own and is just fragments from the environment and from observation being pieced together to form one cohesive sadass

- trusting easily at first but has a hard time trusting again when that trust is broken

- ptsd

- not being able to breathe when someone is angrily clacking the plates while washing

- BEING EASILY FRIGHTENED WHEN YELLED AT AND WILL GO INTO A PANIC ATTACK

- not holding grudges and not taking revenge on past bullies bc they were immature and changed now

[weannoyingbouquetgalaxy-blog1]

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"affordable auto insurance omaha ne

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I live in NY. I'm looking into buying a 2006 mustang (not gt). I've had my license for about two years. I will be on my parents insurance (state farm) but the car will be in my name and I will need full coverage. I have a good job but, I'm just looking for estimates on what it will cost me monthly or yearly.Thank you!""

""How much cheaper would it be to go under my dads insurance for a van, if it was 2000 on my own policy? (Year)?""

My INSURANCE quote is around 2000 Annual for my Ford Transit Van. Im 17 years of age and would really like this to be a tad cheaper for the first year until I get my little own run Business going a bit more. Is there anybody who can give me an estimate on how much Im looking at if I went under my fathers Insurance? Cheers Guys! Jack Osborne. All Answers Appreciated. (Added - I am not able to get a quote from my dads insurance people so we are changing it over. Please do NOT give me nasty answers as these will be classed as immature) If you haven't got anything nice to say, Don't say anything at all.""

Which insurance is better?

which insurance is better blue cross and blue shield or aflac, what is the difference between them""

Health Insurance Now and Later?

I am married going on 2 years. We have decided that we do want children. I am looking at health insurance for myself and I was wondering if I just get health insurance including dental or do I need to go ahead and apply for pregnancy insurance before we even start trying to get pregnant? Are there any insurance companies who are better than others?

What is the best insurance company to have if you need to go into a rehabilitation center?

Which insurance covers the most??

How much does liability insurance cost for a night club business?

I'm trying to get a night club business started and i need insurance how much does it normally cost? and what kind do you recommend getting?

What is the best motorcycle towing insurance to have?

I have a Yamaha 650 V-Star with spoke wheels and I tend to go on several hundred mile road trips. I did not had a flat in 6,000 miles of riding last year, but I want to be prepared.""

What is the yearly insurance rates for a street bike/rice rocket?

What is the yearly insurance rates for a street bike/rice rocket?

Health insurance?

I was involved in a boat accident, that caused my ligaments to be torn. Now, on crutches and some pain.. i wonder, I don't have health insurance... can you guys give me any suggestions as to what i can do to pay for this? i live in california... if that matters.... thanks""

Car Insurance?

Can anyone recommend any cheap insurance companies? Thanks in advance. :)

I am looking for insurance on house?

i have drive insurance and i want to know if they have insurance on house also.

How much is car insurance for a 17 year old female?

im 17 and would love to buy myself a car but i worry about the insurance. i am thinking of buying a used 1998 jeep grand cherokee, its a really good price but i dont want to go and buy the car if insurance is way to expensive. any ideas on how much insurance would cost. if it counts i do get good grades in school.""

""I have no insurance and I need help on OCD I'm in Phoenix, AZ please help.?""

I have no insurance and I need help on OCD I'm in Phoenix, AZ please help.?""

About how much does auto insurance cost per month for someone who's 30 years old & drives a small basic car?

I know this varies by situation........but give me an educated guess. I'm looking for the MINIMUM premium; just the portion that the law requires you to buy. Not the portion that requires you to insure your own car....but to insure the person you hit. How much does that cost?

""If I have health insurance, should I not pay for certain coverages on my car insurance?""

I have health insurance with HealthNet. For car insurance, there seems to be 3 major items for coverage: -BODILY INJURY LIABILITY -PROPERTY DAMAGE LIABILITY -UNINSURED MOTORIST & UNDERINSURED MOTORIST I'm under the impression that the third item is health insurance *for me* if I get into an accident. Why do I want that if I am paying for medical insurance anyway? Should I minimize coverage on this item?""

Insurance on motorcycle ?

It would be a Kawasaki ninja zx6r it is a 2006 and 600 cc engine.. I am 16 and live in northwestern Pennsylvania... I would get minimum coverage.. I would also be adding on to my dads car insurance plan and I would be getting a 20% discount for good driver etc. About how much do you think the insurance on it would be?thanks

What is the cheapest insurance for a new driver?

I'm a new driver and I don't make much but I do need insurance so what is a cheap one?

How much does your health insurance cost per month?

I'm not trying to be nosy. Ax on another question stated his is $60 a month. Mine is a little over $100 a week. Does that seem high?

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

My car got hit in the middle of the night. I don't have insurance but the person at fault does.?

I woke up yesterday to find my car hit and another car, with temp tags, abandoned up the road (it had a lot of damage to the front of it, so it was obviously the one that hit mine.) Today the officer who came yesterday called and had found the person at fault and gave me all of their information. I don't have insurance currently, and my car will cost a few $100 to repair, so what can I do with this info?""

Can I add my 18yo niece to my medical insurance?

She is a college student and we provide more than half of her support. I do claim her as a dependent on my taxes, but only starting this year. I know I can keep my own children on the policy through age 26 (if in college, I think), but I didn't know if I could add my niece. thanks!""

How can you find out a property owner's insurance company?

Can you sue the owner for violent acts of a minor who lives on their property as well as the violent act physically occuring on their property? My daughter was jumped from behind and beat violently in the head. The girl recieved a ticket yet my daughter had to go to the hospital. Now she is afraid to go to school. The attacker is in her class.

Health insurance quote?

Where can I get a free health insurance online quote? Hi Everyone- This is my first time on Yahoo Answers! I'm looking for a place where I can get an online free health insurance quote. I'm always skeptical everything out there is a scam. Thanks for your help!

Car insurance?

suppose a 24 yr old is paying $600 a year for liablility car insurance. how much will this person be paying when they reach 25 years old?

How much does insurance cost on a Ferrari?

I've always wondered what the cost of insurance would be for a $250k car such as a Ferrari F430. just curious

I want to get a nissan 350z and i just wanted to know for those who have one how much is insurance average cos

I want to get a nissan 350z and i just wanted to know for those who have one how much is insurance average cos

""Car insurance help, cost per month?""

I got in a fender bender and it was my fault, the guys bumper got a little bent on one side. it was supposed to be done without insurance but thats another story! he quoted me 800. how much will this affect my insurance monthly? im 19 and drive a honda civic""

Car mod insurances?

does a body kit cost alot on your insurances.if you no what percentage it increces. thanks

Want the cheapest and most affordable insurance in Florida (Tampa) !!!?

He guys, I'm 19 years old and just received my driving license this week. I want to insure my car that I just bought recently , would someone tell me a name of a company that offer an affordable insurance for student ? Just to let you know , some people say that there is no differences between insurance companies prices. but actually that is WRONG !!!>>>>> Some companies try to get customers by cheap prices > please let me know if you have experiences this situation.""

Third party fire and theft? car insurance?

hi im currently searching for car insurance and ive been quoted 2800 for comprehensive insurance and when i gave third party fire and theft it came out to 1700 the car is a corsa 998c 2006 what is the difference between them both? thanks

Pay out of pocket for my car or go through my insurance company?

I live on a hill. Last week, in a quirky weather situation, the street I live on got super-slick just long enough for my 2000 Toyota Camry to go into a 300' free-slide down the hill and crash into a curb and a tree. It was a one-car accident, no one was injured. The repairman can only give me a rough estimate at this time but he thinks it'd cost about $1500 to repair using old body parts, although he says it could cost more if he finds more damage as he goes along--in that case he thinks it might cost up to $2,000 to patch it up out of pocket. I asked him about the pros and cons of paying out of pocket vs. going through insurance in my particular case. He said that if I chose to go through insurance--which would mean getting a USAA adjuster out and all--that he was thinking it would probably cost $2500 to repair, maybe more if it turned out there was more damage that he could see at this time. But he pointed out that I'd have to pay the deductible (which I think is $500 for my car, not sure) and that my insurance rates would go up. But then you'd end up with a new-looking car. [as opposed to a patched-up looking car]. My husband absolutely wants to pay out of pocket--he does not want to involve our auto insurance company, saying, The insurance company is only for the big accidents. But I'd like to keep this car for several more years if I can because there's no car out there that I like better, so I'm wondering if maybe it might be worth going through the insurance company. Here's a little more information: My 2000 Toyota Camry has 115,000 miles on it and has been very reliable over the years. The motor wasn't damaged and, in fact the car is already driving well again except that one headlight and blinker are broken. There is, of course, body damage to the front and hood, plus a 6 crack over the left back tire (not very deep), which occurred when I backed out of the tree, slid again, and hit the curb on the opposite side of the street. Re: Our insurance situation? We (me and my 3 driving age children) had a string of costly minivan accidents in the 1990s: 1. one in 1997 when my daughter totaled my van, and got sued for injuries by 2 people in the other car (the lawsuit was settled many years ago but it dragged out for years). 2. one by me, a one-car accident, no injuries, our insurance company paid for the damage minus the deductible 3. 2 accidents caused by other drivers, so my insurance company didn't have to pay any damages--I don't know if USAA takes accidents caused by other people into consideration or not. 4. My son totaled my van in 2000 [which is why my current car is a year 2000]. So we have not called upon our insurance company for any expenses for almost 11 years now. Regarding traffic tickets? I got one 3-4 years ago for speeding--35 or 40 mph in a 25 mph zone-. If my points from this ticket have expired by now (not sure), then there are no other points on our record. Our children are now out of the nest and only one of them borrows our car when she comes to visit once every month or two. I put less than 10,000 miles/year on my car for work and vacations. We live in PA. So my question is this: Given the age of the car, amount of damage, etc., is it worth going through our insurance company to get the car fixed rather than pay OOP--or would going through insurance raise our insurance premiums so much that it wouldn't be worth it?""

Looking for affordable health insurance in California?

Is there any way that an individual might be able to join an existing health insurande group? I am single, and my job does not offer insurance. I am 28 and healthy, but the costs of individual plans are out of my budget. I was just wondering if there was a better way to insure myself on the up and up.""

Affordable health insurance!!?

For some reason, the insurance coverage I have seems to go up every year (and because I moved recently it jumped up another $60 a month). My wife and I get crappy coverage on top of it. To make things more hectic; we are pregnant (she's pregnant -not me, but you get the point). And beause Maternity coverage runs another $500 a month it isn't affordable on a student income (I am currently in Law School, while she works). So, if anyone has any information on how they managed the pregnancy, or even just real life, without insurance (or on what insurance?), I would be extremely appreciative if you could offer it up. I Might even give you the best answer....or whatever (who knows, that may motivate some people) So, I'm looking for affordable health insurance coverage. It doesn't need to cover maternity...I know thats expensive everywhere. What I am looking for is something under 300 a month that still covers some outpatient surgery, or even more than 2 doctor visits a year!!""

""Who are the best car rental company, insurance wise and cost etc London?""

there are so many to choose from, terms conditions insurance etc anyone use them a lot and know the best to use""

How much would insurance on a 1990 dodge neon ?

I think it might be my first car , && I have to pay for insurance .""

""I was driving my husbands car, I was not on his insurance yet. A car hit us while sitting at a stop sign?""

I was driving my husbands car, I was not on his insurance yet (married two weeks before). A car hit us while sitting at a stop sign. The at fault driver's insurance company is ...show more""

How do you fight with the other party's insurance company?

Hi, my car insurance covers for liability only and now I have an accident with a big truck. The big truck hit my car from the side. We were driving from 2 lanes next to each other and at one point the two lanes combine into one. While I was alittle pass over the truck, it hit me from the side. Their side has no damage since it is a big truck and our side has damaged from the driver side. The police report didn't explain clearly about whose fault it is except it mentions what the two drivers said. I think it is not my fault and the other driver denied it is his fault either. My insurance company didn't help much because we only have liability. Now, the other party insurance company called me and said they can't pay for the damanges since it is both parties fault. Therefore, pay for damanges on our own. Like I said, the other party didn't have any damages. If we have to fix it by ourselves, it will cost over $1500. :-( How should I fight with the insurance company to get my claims?""

Why should anyone be fined for not buying health insurance?

What should someone do if he/she is unable to afford it? Also, wouldn't such a law actually hurt the people it was supposed to help?""

What should I do to get an International Medical Insurance?

I am a visitor in the United States, and I ll be here for about 2 months and I need a Medical Insurance, need some recommendations and where to go, and the docs necessaries.""

Insurance for a 350z on Parents plan?

Hey there so when i turn 18, im buying a 2003 nissan 350z with my own money. Right now im 17 and have been driving an old civic for almost the past 2 years and have never gotten in an accident or ticket (not that that lowers the insurance at all) and have the good student discount. so i followed the rule of thumb to buying a car thats okay to beat up when you first start driving. anyways, ive been looking for a lot of answers to my question, but all of the people asking it seem to be paying for theyre own insurance. Im on my parents plan, and when i buy the car its going to be put under my dads name (he is 52 and is a teacher btw if that matters). Both my parents are extremely responsible drivers, so im assuming their insurance rate wont be as high as if the car was in my name. the one issue with this car is how much insurance is going to be exactly. I looked for a quote on progressive, and im almost positive it cant be right. when i typed in the insurance cost for my 2003 civic with me paying it myself, it was only like $10 cheaper per month than a 350z, which like i said seems somewhat off. anyways, does anyone that went through buying a sports car when they were 18 with kinda the same thing have any answers for me? or even if you just know insurance well i just want to know. My parents would be okay with insurance going up some, but not astronomically high (like people were saying a couple thousand a year). ive asked them if they can talk to our agent (we are insured with PEMCO), but they keep saying theyll do it later. anyways, sorry for the long question. but any answers would help! Thanks!""

Can i put my parents on my medical insurance at work .?

what would i have to do to qualify them to be added to my insurance.

Should I report my car accident to my insurance company?

It was actaully me rear ending her car on my motorcycle. We exchanged insurance info so I know whe is going to report, but do I have to report it also? My bike was just scratched on the cheap plastic part and I only have liability. I know my insurance will go up either way""

What is the cheapest car insurance for me?

i am 18, had a DWI in dec 2006 what would be the cheapest liability only car insurance for me? thank you""

Vw r32 any idea on insurance?

hi i am 23 year old female with 2 years no claims. just lookign for a very rough idea of costs to insure an r32, any similar ppl can tell me? thanks""

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

Where can I get affordable health insurance?

My husband has been sick for like a year and we cannot afford to go to the doctor in fact he went to a doctor and they told him he has to go see another doctor because they can't find anything wrong with him. so that's $300 down the drain and we haven't even paid it. Is there something I can get him that would cost $30 a month and have some way for him to get some tests that wouldn't kill us financially?

Affordable kids health insurance in Florida?

I recently got a new job, and my income combined with my husbands will be *just* over 200% of the Federal Poverty Level, making us ineligible for the $20/month payment for Medikids. It would cost $160 for each of our 2 children to continue this full coverage/no co-pay insurance. We cannot afford this. What are some other options? We definitely cannot afford insurance for the whole family.""

""I'm under GEICO in NJ. If every member of the family is insured, how much cheaper w/ safe driving course?

Three members in the family. How much cheaper will insurance get if we all take the Safe-Driving Course?

Insurance for my Audi R8?

I'm 18 and my parents have finally bought me the car of my dreams for my birthday! It's an Audi R8, second hand though of course! Anyway I can't wait to get it on the road but need to sort out insurance first, I have 1 year of no claims. The car has a 4.2ltr engine. Could anyone give me a general idea of insurance prices/good companies to go with? I'm not expecting insurance to be cheap but my parents are paying and I just wanted to reccommed them a good company to go with and a guide price so they know. Thanks""

Affordable term life insurance quote?

What good is affordable term life insurance?

What if: Driving without proof of insurance?

What if someone BORROWS my car and gets caught driving without proof of insurance (my insurance card?) NOT saying there is no insurance - the car is insured. But what if the person gets caught without my insurance card? Who gets charged? Will my insurance go up?

Does home owners insurance covers water leaking ac ?

my central unit ac is leaking ,i have insurace but not sure if it will cover it . please help!""

Do anybody know anything about Gerber Life Insurance for children?

I've heard rumors that they dont pay. Do anybody know anything about Gerber.

How much is the insurance on Brady Quinn's new car?

http://liberal-debutante.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/pink.jpg

Does anyone know of affordable medical insurance for unemployed individuals in NY state?

Does anyone know of affordable medical insurance for unemployed individuals in NY state?

Can group health insurance deny for Pre existing?

I'm on my moms insurance and she's moving jobs and her new insurance is going to be group coverage blue cross, can group coverage deny you coverage for Pre existing or only private? Why's the difference between group and private? Thanks!""

How much does the car insurance cost every month for a 17 y/o teenager here in US in texas?

with a 2005 neon dodge car? help coz my cousin is goin to get a car this summer. thankx guys

Do you have to have insurance to register your vehicle in California?

I called the DMV to ask this, but I have been on hold for about 40 min.""

Health Insurance for an Eighteen year old Graduate?

Alright. I am in desperate need of some knowledge. I just graduated from high school and live in Idaho with my boyfriend and his parents. The house includes 2 parents, 3 kids under the age of eighteen and 2 adults that are exactly of the age of eighteen years (7 total). I used to live with my father, who does not have any health insurance (he's a Veteran). And even before that I lived with my mother in California who although does have health insurance, I was never a part of. My boyfriend's mother wants to take me to the Department of Health and Welfare so that I could maybe get with Medicaid or something to help me out. I haven't had a job yet (still trying to find one) and I really am quite lost in the world. I am behind on immunizations, have not visited a dentist...in a while. I do have terrible eye sight and will need more exams in the future and have not yet received any type of check up from a doctor or a physical. I was wondering if there was a way that I could get on my mom's insurance even though she lives in another state and maybe if welfare was all I could really do now. I'm not very educated about insurance and was hoping if there was a wise person out there who could help me. I appreciate any help at all and thank all of you for taking the time to read my cry for help.""

How can i start selling life insurance at home and what type of license do i need?

Would i be able to start my own buisness online and localy selling another companys life insurance and setting up appointments what kind of license do i need to sell insurance and for my own buisness do i just selling life insurance for another company do i just need a llc license

How much would my insurance be?

I am a 17 year old male and I'm looking a getting a ford mustang. I am trying to get a 2008 v6 4.0 L convertible is my car insurance going to be rediculously high?

""I Bought my first car, Its a 2004 Honda Accord, i need information about insurance.?""

I need some info. about the best and the cheapest or the most reliable one i've never had insurance before..pleaaasee tell me where to go, please help.""

Insurance rates going up?

If there is a licensed driver in a home where ppl have auto insurance would the rates go up? I really need to know.

Esurance Homeowners Insurance?

does anyone, or did anyone ever have Home owner's insurance from Esurance? is it any good? pros ? cons? Thanks.""

How much will my dads insurance go up?

my dad himself has only been insured for 2 years and his insurance is currently 2400 for 12 months. im 17 yeas old and want to be added to the insurance and add a car. how much extra do you think it will be?

Insurance on SUVs?

How much is insurance on SUVs usually... like a Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo or a Chevrolet.. anyone know?

Does home insurance cover acidental damage?

I acidently spilit water on my laptop and broke it. Would home insurance cover this?

Difference between health and life insurance?

Difference between health and life insurance?

""I don't have health insurance, should I get AFLAC?

My company sent an AFLAC representative to us today. I heard it was supplemental health insurance and it costs $35/month for accidents and sickness. I don't have any insurance at ...show more

Marital status for car insurance?

trying to fill out an insurance quote and wondering what i come under for the maritial status, been living with my gf for around 6 ish months and we are engaged. these are the options i was given. married single common law partner(separate) civil partnership""

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

affordable auto insurance omaha ne

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/affordable-insurance-harvard-anthony-white"

[sizzlingcrusadebouquetfan-blog]

Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

"Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google"",I suggest that you visit this internet site where one can get quotes from different companies:""

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolution.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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If your insurance is canceled will I have to pay to get the tag legal again,if so how much.Thanks in advance :)""

Can one ask a car insurance company to not file a claim?

If one had an accident and it is their fault, can they ask their insurance company to not file a claim and you take care of the collision damage to the other car? If the other person calls their insurance company, who in turn contacts your, is your insurance company obligated to file the claim because they now know?""

How much would maintenance cost on a BMW 325i?

a 2000 ish-2003 bmw 325i (same series)...how much would maintenance cost? I like the BMW in that it has EVERYTHING that I want, it's (2001) version is in my price range to buy, except I'm a student and I work part time. I can at an uncomfortable MAX 100$ a month for maintenance (not including gas and insurance). I am a DIY person (I can do moderately difficult car repairs) so I won't go to the dealer much. But I heard that this BMW needs synthetic oil and premium gas, and a couple of my friends said that BMW's NEED maintenance or else they suck. I will do NEEDED maintenance (such as if I need oil change, or my brakes are bad) but I won't do stuff that aren't needed (like idk...coolant flush etc.).""

What is the best insurance?

Okay. Need the cheapest insurance for my boyfriend. He is 20, only three speeding tickets within a three years time, and wants a newer car.""

How much will my car insurance cost me?

I am 18 years old, and live in Northern BC. I have had my N license for just over a year, I have had NO accidents or tickets. I have a 1995 Honda Civic 4 Door. I am a very safe driver and I have been unlucky to find a good quote. Do you think it would be around $100/month?""

What kind of car insurance for a adapted van?

Ok I have a 1993 Dodge Caravan. I am disabled so it has a ramp that is let out and brought back in. It has disabled hand controls and a drivers seat that raises and lowers and turns around.. just a bit more than your average seat does now-a-days.. this van was adapted when it was made.. so i have no receipts on the modifications or anything.. i could get an estimate from a local store that deals in strictly handicapped equipment.. how do i properly insure this van? I need to make sure that if it is ever totaled that i dont get just blue book. since i have to have a adapted van (i live in a rural area and there is no dependable handicapped public transportation) i have the permanent general insurance now, with a $1000 on the custom equipment. but i worry thats not enough or maybe even doesnt cover my handicap adaptions. the agent with them was snappy, rude, and didnt know anything.. ugh! what company should i go to? what do i need to have in my policy? help! i keep getting all this bad advice from the insurance companies because no one knows what to do!!!""

Renters Insurance? What Kind? Is it really worth it?

I am renting a condo from a friend, got a good deal, just signed the lease, he recomended that i get Renters Insurance because he said damages I make to the place or to other owners in the condo I am responsible, even if something happens to me, the insurance would help. Now I would like to know any good insurance agents (e.g Geico) should i get Renters/or Condo , not new to this, want a good rate yet want good coverage for damage, fire, theft you know.""

Perth; Can I ride a motorcycle without insurance?

And if I am buying motorcycle insurance, how come they ask me how much I want to pay? Please see the link at http://rac.com.au/Insurance/Motor-insurance/Motorcycle-insurance/Motorcycle-insurance-quote.aspx So how much must I pay? I bought my second hand scooter for A$1,000 on bikesales.coml.au""

Car Insurance question about someone hitting my parked car?

Hi guys, well let me start with what happened first. I am a college student and so I live in an apartment and park my car next to a whole bunch of other cars. I parked my car in a completely empty spot with no cars at all, and I saw that it was completely fine. I didn't go out on Sunday, but the next day on Monday when I was about to leave for school I saw a big scratch/gash on the left side of my bumper about 25 inches x 20 inches. I do not know who and when it happened, so I called the police and tried to claim a police report but the police said he couldn't do anything because if I knew who hit it, he would be able to do something. But since I don't know who hit my car, he couldn't give me one. I also called my insurance company (State Farm) and told her what happened and the size and she told me that my deductable is $500 and they'll send out a representative to check out the damage. I didn't give her the green light yet but what should I do? The scratch is bad because I have a black car and you could see white scratches from far away. I mean, if my damage is less than $500, I'm going to have to pay my insurance too right? Will this also increase my insurance too? I'm already broke as is because of school and I don't want to have to pay more for something I didn't do.""

Whas isthe best health insurance plan for single individual?

Married male, 33, smoker. Wife has insurance through job, I do not. Too expensive to go through her work. What is the best/most affordable per month insurance plan for myself only?""

What state or states do not require car Auto insurance in order to own a car and use it ?

I would like to know what states in USA do not require car Auto insurance for the owner or user of the car he or she is driving? If there is such a state please prove me where you get the source! And How does the driver pay off all the victims billing cost after injuring this victim and victim has a bunch of bills coming in from Hospital service? If now you agree with me that all drives should be required to pay and have auto insurance, This is the same reason is why all people need to have healthcare insurance who can afford it! Not only it will keep the insurance cost lower for average person, everyone is now guaranteed to qualify without being denied due to history, disability, or medical cost person needs, but if everyone has health insurance nation wide medical expense will be less rising; like people who did not have insurance get into accident/injury Whether falling off a cliff, get hit by a car and driver drives off, or gets injured due to snake bite. NONE of them are intentional or expected but they happen and many other! If everyone is insured the insurance pays for the medical expenses whether its $500 or $500K But if not everybody has healthcare insurance average person wont be able to afford the $full medical bill will be hunted by collection agency but still not likely to pay any more then $5000 for medical expenses! There for the rest of the medical cost falls on WHOM??? THE TAX TAPYERS OR OTHER medical service Customers!!! By raising the prices of medical expenses! THAT is why Californias Blue Cross Blue Shield insurance Raised about 57% cost in 2010 or 2011!! What do you expect if Thousand or millions of Illegal most Latino immigrant get Medical service in Hospitals like even Child birth, or emergency room, but they dont have medical insurance, cant afford it, YOU SEE that raised their insurance cost BY 57%!!! DO YOU WANT THIS TO HAPPEN NATION WIDE?? IF NO If you want Medical cost to remain affordable, THEN A) Support National Healthcare that everybody should have it who can afford it B) In order to receive Fed/State TAX, Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid from the Illegal Immigration should be attempted to be caught and exported to their main country, or should be attempted to be caught and if given full citizen ship to them only if these immigrants must server some number of years of Army, military, or Air force service voluntarily. OR be required to pay a minimum amount of $ that individual invested into the Social Security system, or minimum number of years legally work in U.S.A, if they want to receive the Social Security benefits if future. HOWEVER How many years serving , How much individual or couple invested minimum, and /or how many minimum number of years in order to qualify for Social Security service is up to the government to calculate and decide. THIS WAY Citizens Will all be able to fully pay their medical expenses, and The illegal immigration will not be as big of an issue!""

What should i do with my insurance to test drive cars?

I am looking at a car tomorrow that i will more than likely buy. My insurance is comprehensive but says the driving of other cars extension is not included for any driver named on the policy I have phoned my insurance company Diamond and the guy said it would cost me 17.50 to insure the car for a day third party. I undestand that third party means if i bump someone my insurance pays for their damage but not for mine. If i decide to buy the car should i be getting fully comprehensive for the day?

""What, in your opinion, is the cheapest auto insurance for a full coverage sports car?""

Hey guys, I need some serious help! I bought a 2005 Mini Cooper convertible last year and have always been on my familys insurance but I was dropped and I need insurance ASAP. What can I expect to pay monthly? I want to put it in my name, but I have tickets and a DWI (still havent gone to court for, so idk if it makes a difference, yet...) and a suspended license so I bet my insurance would be ridiculous! My fiancee also has too many tickets to be a candidate. I'm thinking about using my 63 year old Godmother who's the original signer on the car because she doesn't have any tickets or accidents so I figured the full coverage would be cheap in her name. She's the one who signed for my car anyway. I'm the cosigner, but she's totally cool with putting the insurance in her name if it saves me money. So, four questions... 1) How much would insurance cost for me? 2) How much would insurance cost for my Godmother? 3) What's the cheapest insurance carrier? 4) What's the average for a full coverage sports car? So yeah, I'm FULL of questions :D Feedback is appreciated, merci! BQ) Who do you have insurance with? BQ2) What kind of vehicule do you have? <3""

Where can I get affordable insurance for my girlfriend?

There could be a chance she might be pregnant in the future. Where can I get affordable maternity insurance?

How much do you pay for car insurance?

I live in new jersey, 20 years old, I drive a 1996 oldsmobile, and I'm on my boyfriends parents insurance paying 115$ a month, my boyfriend and I share the car, he's 23 & the insurance was originally 80 then it went to 115$ because his sister got in an accident...I would like to know how much do you pay & what's your insurance company?""

""Hi, this is my first time getting contact lenses, i just wanna know where can I find an affordable price?""

I have called a few optometry clinics already but the price is just not satisfying; it was around $350.00 for a year (including eye exam). I would like to know if there is any other place that would do it for cheaper. By the way, I live around San Gabriel, CA. Please recommend optometry clinics located around me(less than 20mins drive), I would appreciate it.""

How much does it cost to insure a Ford Mustang?

Now for my first car I really wanted a Ford and the only one I like is the mustang. I know that they are sports cars so the insurance is high but I would like to know exactly how much it would cost for insurance especially since it would be my first car.

""Liability insurance,does it cover damages to to break-in?

does liability insurance cover the cost of replacing key-switch and ignition turner when vehicle was broken into by vandals.I have full coverage on one vehicle and just liability on other.does it include cost of parts and labor for mechanic to replace?

Why insurance companies charge more simply on your car color?

I bought a 1991 Ford Mustang and the color of it is Red. My best friend has the same car, we both have same company, same age, same ticket-free record. And on our insurance bill we got showing the coverage, my payments were $28.50 more than his. I called them and they said it was because of the color of my car. His is blue. Why is this?""

In need of Medical Insurance?

I'm 18 and a Student and I dont have any medical Insurance is there a way to get I can apply for some aid I dont have a job, Live in California""

Which dental insurance/plan?

i recently came to the US from UK and i have 2 teeth at front that were once chipped and now built up with 'cement'. i plan to possibly have a couple boxing matches while im here. so im looking for a purely dental plan that covers things like the possibility of my tooth chipping again etc. but would also like basic dental coverage while im here too (as my wisdom teeth are coming through n its possible i might need them removed?)

Do i need to call my car insurance company?

I was in a car accident today and it was not a small accident. I hit a car on its side. there was an older woman so an ambulance came but she ended up not being hurt, just procautionary. the police were called and they took all my info and whatnot. It was wierd the police did not give me any papers or anything and told me i could leave. they just asked me if i wanted my car towed and i said no. the police officer also told me when i asked him that i dont need to call my insurance company unless i want to make a claim. is that true? i only have 1 way insurance so im probably going to scrap my car. I always thought u should call them no matter what, do you know if i am obligated to call them or will they contact me? location: Quebec, Canada thanks a bunch, Tyler""

What are the chances my daughter could get good health insurance?

That's affordable? She has a few preexisting conditions. Spina Bifida (birth defect) asthma and Chiari Malformation. She only has one kidney. Right now she's receiving ...show more

Can please someone suggest the cheapest and yet good car insurance company?

thanks

Can I get insurance subsidies under the affordable care act?

I'm 56 years old and still working and get insurance through my large employer. But, let's say I decide to retire. I'm single with no dependents. My net worth not ...show more""

Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google"",I suggest that you visit this internet site where one can get quotes from different companies:""

2 speeding tickets in 1 days! USAA insurance. Help Please!?

Ok, so as the title says, i got 2 speeding tickets in 1 day. Yes that was stupid, i know. I am really worried. one is a $205 fine, the other $110 both for speeding 15 mph over. I think it is possible to get defensive driving with one of the tickets because my last ticket was around 2 years ago. Thats the other thing. 2 yrs ago i got in a wreck, my fault and a ticket too + defensive driving. so with all that taken into account. do you think i will get dropped from USAA insurance or how much do you think my rates will rise? Thanks for the help!""

""Is there nay car insurance companies cheaper than elephant, bell & admiral ?""

Im a 24 year old male looking for cheap car insurance quotes, all of them seem to be quite a bit over 1000 and even 2000 - 3000 and thats when i checked money supermarket and compare the market but with elephant,bell and admiral my best quotes seem to be around 800 is there any other cheap car insaurance companies anyone can reccommend i try ?""

Buying a car in California?

I'm moving to California next week and I would like to sell my car here in NC. I will pay cash for a vehicle at a dealership when I arrive in L.A. When I buy it, do I have to have a CA drivers license? I will not have a permenent address right away, so I was wondering what the procedures are? I have a NC drivers license but will not establish residency in California until I find a job. Any help? Thanks""

""If I buy a car and plan to restore, is car insurance usually alot cheaper? Can I still drive it occasionally?""

I am planning on buying a 84 blazer and fixing it up, it runs and stuff, so I can a discount on insurance if I plan on restoring it?""

""My husband and I are self employed.....We are shopping for health Insurance, what do recommend?""

We are looking for affordable health insurance, but I don't even know where to begin....If you are self employed, who is your provider and why?""

Car insurance lapse question for NY?

We don't do automatic payment with our insurance so sometimes we don't have enough to pay and twice we'd lapsed in three years. First time we paid the civil penalty on all three vehicles. This time? There's a three year limit; we had to turn in the plates for eight days (the amount of lapsing) and wait while using a rental car. My mother found out by getting pulled over and getting a ticket. We just got the new plates, new stickers, and are fine now. But she said when you pay the civil penalty you are cleared immediately in the system; if you get new plates and registration, is it the same? She said it can take up to three months until cops read that your registration is valid. I'm having an anxiety attack over this as I've never gotten pulled over and am terrified of cops and travel populated, cop traveled streets to my job. Thanks.""

""I gave a urine sample for life insurance, want two more samples on different days. Why??

I gave a urine and blood sample about a month ago for life insurance. I received a call yesterday from the company that takes performs the physical and takes the samples...they said my insurance company wants to more urine samples on two different days. Why is that?? It has me really worried and I can't call the insurance office until tomorrow to find out why. I would assume that they had messed up the sample if they just wanted one more but they want two on two different days. :/ I informed them that I take birth control and sometimes take Ibuprofen. I don't use any other drugs or smoke and very rarely drink alcohol. I also have not been having sex (only with 2 people) and have been tested for STD's and visit the gynocologist every year and am always fine. I didn't receive anything from my insurance company about my blood tests which means those didn't show anything (would only send to me if something wrong). Any ideas about what's up with the urine sample requests???

Health insurance help please?

My husband and I were dropped by our health insurance company. We think it's because we started using our coverage (miscarriage). My husband is a contractor so the insurance they offer is pathetic and doesn't cover anything. But, we can't afford to being paying high deductibles and premiums. We make too much to get on medicaid, so we fall in the middle. Are there any programs or resources available for the average class family?""

Why can you 16 years old own cars in America?

Hello, So when I'm watching MTV or whatever television program here in the Netherlands I'm noticing that so many 16 year old drive a car. But where do you guys get the money from? Because a really crappy cheap car cost about 1000 euro's and than you need to pay a 390 euro (507 dollars) a month. I'm 16 too and with my 40 hours of work in a month I make 200 euro (260 dollars), so I can't afford a car now. (at least not paying every single month 390 euros) Nevertheless in the Netherlands you must be 18 years old to drive a car, but even when I'm 18 I think I won't make a 390 euro a month (only for my car). So do your parents pay? Don't you have to pay taxes or whatever? Thanks. David Calculation: Cheap car = 1000 euro Good cheap car = 3000 euro Average insurance 18 year old = 100 euro a month Can't find translation but road taxes = 80 euro a month cost of maintance = 80 euro a month Average driving 1000km a month with 7/100L = 70 * 1,80= 126 euro We pay 1.80 euro a liter (benzine) = 1 gallon = 3,8L = 6,84 euro's = 8,9 dollar per gallon so: 390 euro = 507 dollars a month""

""Insurance rates for a 1996 Ford Crown Victoria in Chattanooga, Tennessee?""

My next car, just need to know the insurance. Asking you guys might prevent me a whole lot of hassle and harassment from the insurance companies.""

Costco auto insurance?

a friend of mine the other day told me that she pays 90 dollars on her car insurance and she is 16 years old. I just wanted to know if there is a catch because it sounds too good to be true.

""Which is better having, single-payer or mandate health insurance & why?""

Which is better having, single-payer or mandate health insurance & why?""

Life insurance question?

Heard an ad for a life insurance policy never heard before. It said if you do not die in a time frame not known, than your will get your money back. Is this the same as all policies that build a cash value simply worded differently or is there a new product on the market? If you care to speculate, then might health care insurance reform lead to such a policy being offered. Death is a bit more certain than needing health care.""

Estimate for car insurance?

I know there are SO many factors considered. I am considering purchasing my first car (I would get it new, have loved Mazda 3 forever) and curious as to what I would pay a month in insurance or what average is. Bit of details, I live in Ontario, Canada, I will be 23 this year, female, I have a clean driving record (granted I've only had my G2 for a year and a half), my credit history is very good if that matters, I took driver's ed. I have no idea about what is considered average. Thanks!""

What is the best short term life insurance plan between monthly premium rupees 500 to 800?

What is the best short term life insurance plan between monthly premium rupees 500 to 800?

Sued by insurance company?

i'm 25 and get health insurance through my work. But just recently, they've upped the fee for it: from $4/paycheck to $8/paycheck (that's weekly, not biweekly). I'm technically still able to use my dad's insurance till i'm 26 and i figure, if i can save $8 a week, then why bother using it through my work at all? But my supervisor is trying to tell me that if my dad's insurance company finds out that i'm eligible to get insurance through my work and don't use it, then they could sue me. Is this true? It shouldn't be up to them which insurance i use. I shouldn't have to pay for something i can get free somewhere else.""

How much does GEICO car insurance cost per month?

...it a kia the 2011 sportage car

Best individual health insurance plan?

My husband and I just found out that his company is raising our medical insurance rates from $212 a month to $400 a month, so we are trying to shop around for the best rates. We have found some, but hardly any include maternity benefits, and we want that parachute just in case any accidents happen. Is there any plans out there cheaper than $400 with maternity, or should we just hope we don't get pregnant for a couple of years? (We plan to switch insurance in 2 years when I get a teaching job)""

How many people really need or should recieve help buying health insurance?

Out of all uninsured 40% are living on a household income of $50,000 or more a year. Unfortunately alot of people would like to indulge in lifes luxuries such as cars, tv, computers, cell phones, and vacations before thinking about their own health and safety Another 20% are non-citizen which includes illegal immigrants. This is straight from the census bureau which the president would use for his information. http://www.census.gov/prod/2008pubs/p60-235.pdf What do you think?""

Auto insurance..??

I'm trying to get just PL&PD, and the insurance websites are really hard for me to understand at the moment... I'm 19, just got my license, no experience on the road good or bad, good grades, and my car is a '96 Ford Taurus... about how much will my insurance be?? just a guess is what I want, and also if you have what company you got your estimate from, that would be really nice. Thanks :)""

Need help ASAP. Is it possible to get retroactive car insurance after a car accident?

I was recently involved in a car accident where I was at fault. The major problem is that at the time it happened my car insurance had been canceled for nonpayment more than 30 days before. Is it possible to pay the premiums that I missed and get retroactive car insurance? I'm trying to avoid a misdemeanor on my record. My insurance company is State Farm, and after the accident I immediately called them and had my insurance reinstated. I also told them about the accident. Please, I need help ASAP.""

Insurance on car group 3?

I'm 17 and only just started driving, i'm looking into buying cars and I can't afford a high insurance price i'd say my top price would be 1800 pounds, i'm looking for buying a car with insurance group 3. Is this to high? will the insurance be through the roof? i'm not very experienced with this so all help would be welcome.""

""As a 16 year old male, how much will I pay for auto insurance?""

I am a 16 year old male (and I already know what statistics show, unfortunately), soon to be 17 years old in October. I will be paying auto insurance pretty soon and I am trying to get an estimate of how much I will be paying monthly/yearly. I obtain a 3.5 GPA and reside in Dayton, Ohio. My mother will be adding me to her insurance plan and I drive a 1999 Chevy Camaro (this is the car that will be insured, and thankfully it does not have a Z28 engine). I'm not sure whether or not the insurance agency will consider this a sports car either, so I'm pretty nervous! Please help me! Thank you!""

Car insurance quote?

I am a 17 year old boy in Texas I just bought a white 1999 Pontiac Grand Am GT 2 door Paid with Cash I've never had a ticket or anything on my record Does anyone know about how much my insurance will run?

What's your Scion TC's Insurance Rate?

Scion TC's are in the top 10 most expensive cars to insure. (Number 2) So I was wondering if you have a TC, how much do you pay monthly? What's your deductible? What insurance company are you with? And how old are you?""

Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google"",I suggest that you visit this internet site where one can get quotes from different companies:""

Life insurance and payout?

I want to get life insurance in the amount of 250000 for my daughter. If I pass away I am concerned how the money will be spent. How can I make sure the money goes to a college education and perhaps buying a home for her. I have no family so I cant ask anybody to take care of this if I pass away. Thanks. I live in California.

Young rider needs insurance help (motorcycle)?

Hello I am completing my motorcycle course this week and will be obtaining my m2 license, I was considering buying a motorcycle. I am a 18 year old male and was wondering if anyone could give me advice or some help for insurance in ontario?. I am aware it will be costly but was wondering if someone had any motorcycle suggestions that would be cheap on insurance or even insurance companies. Recent personal experiences would be nice. Thanks for the help!""

How much is full coverage for auto insurance cost monthly usually ? ?

I was thinking about financing a 2000 nissan maxima but im not sure if its a good idea because of monthly car payments and car insurance plus if it breaks down idk what I would do. I just need to know how much is full coverage for auto insurance usually cost per month or is there something cheaper I can get other than full coverage.

Cheaper Insurance on Mitsub evo?

Im looking into buy an Mitsubishi EVO 8 but the insurance will be way too expensive. If i finance it and put the car in my moms name and the insurance in her name could i save money(my moms like 54). My insurance company says i can use other peoples cars as long as i have a policy myself which i do. How much do some of you people pay?

Insurance on mini cooper?

I'm 16, and I want a mini cooper S or a scion tC. It will be my first car. But I was wondering which car's insurance would be higher, and which an estimate about how much it would be. I've never had an accident, and I took driver's ed in school. and I also have a 3.6 GPA.""

Does anyone know of an affordable individual health insurance plan in Texas?

Does anyone know of an affordable individual health insurance plan in Texas?

Insurance companies will have 32 million new customers because of Obamacare. How is this socialism?

The Affordable Care Act was modeled after a Republican health care plan by the Heritage Foundation and was first implemented by a Republican governor. All this bill does is makes sure that insurance companies have 32 million new customers. I could understand if you called Single Payer socialism (which I highly support), but calling Obamacare socialist is pretty stupid.""

""I am 18 years old and have 6 points on my driving license, will my insurance cost go down after a year?

I currently aren't on any insurance policy!

""New York car insurance, LoJack discount for Allstate?""

Hi all, I currently have Allstate car insurance and I bought a new car with a LoJack installed. When I tried to get the discount, they only took off $7 per month on my policy.. Looking online, I discovered that New York state mandates that car insurance companies must give a discount for LoJack, but I'm not sure how much. The LoJack website isn't very clear on the subject, saying 25% for NY but I'm not sure if that means up to 25% or a mandated 25%... Anyone happen to know? I'm having trouble finding any concrete information. Here's the info from LoJack I found: http://www.lojack.com/car-insurance-discount.html Thanks!""

Any idea on how much car insurance will cost for new driver I'm 28yrs old??

please help i just need an estamate looking into buying a small car after hopefully passing the uk driving test next week. 1.4 engine size nothing to smart just to get me from a-b i only have around 500 to buy a car, just trying to figure out how much to put aside,tried calling insurance companys but they said they wont quote with out full licsense details.... all i want is an idea!!!thanks in advance""

How much does insurance cost a month?

Okay, I'm 21 years old and I'm a full time college student I work part time and I live with my mother and step-father. I'm on my fathers insurance. My father is a Department of Transportation worker he has worked for the state for about 33 years. He has PEIA insurance. He called me today and was complaining cause he got a doctors bill for me for $35...he wanted to know why and I said idk maybe it was a mistake can you pay it since it's not that much...and then he goes into this whole thing how he pays my insurance every month...blah blah blah...but he doesnt realize that my mom and my step dad do everything else I mean they pay my other bills. He hasn't paid anything since I turned 18 except for insurance (he won't even take out a loan for my education...my mom and I do that). I pay my car insurance,gas, and cell phone bill out of my part time job check cause I commute to school. He has the nerve to call me and gripe over $35!!! WTF?!?! Does anyone know how much he pays a month or about how much he pays?""

Where can I get the cheapest motorcycle insurance quote for a brand new VESPA?

I'm 20 years old and looking into buying a vespa to use in Toronto! Looking for the cheapest insurance possible!

Car insurance?

im trying to look for a cheap car insurance company any ideas??

Looking for cheap car insurance.?

have a dodge avenger. and need suggestions for in expensive insurance

Is a 2002 cadillac deville cheaper to insure than 1995 mercedes S420?

Is a 2002 cadillac deville DTS 4 door 4.6L northstar V8 @70,000 miles cheaper to insure and repair than 1995 mercedes S420 4 door @199,000 miles?""

Health Insurance and Pre-existing Conditions?

What kinds of pre-existing conditions can give you a problem when getting your own health insurance?

Health Insurance for Self employed with Maternity coverage?

I am self employed and want to purchase health insurance for myself. I need to find insurance with maternity coverage. I have looked on several online insurance quote websites, but have been unable to find maternity coverage. I live in Texas by the way. Does anyone out there have some info for me?""

""For an fha home mortgage what is a rough estimate of how much we can get, me and my wife combined make?""

69,000 a year, we have a car payment at 325, student loans total of 460 a month, a credit card payment of 15 a month with a balance of only 30 left, other than the normal cell phone bill and utilites car insurance etc that basically all we have , my credit score is a 688 , and my wifes will soon be around a 640 so we have the required score for an fha loan""

I hit my sisters car in the drive way. will my insurance go up?

When i was backing out she was really close and i hit here side with mine. i put a palm size dent in the car and i broke here mustangs lubber. will my insurance go up because of this? i herd that something like that it wont. it happened in my drive way. and my insurance comp is the General

Which car would be cheaper for me to insure?

Would it be cheap for me to insure myself on my mum's insurance (her being the main driver) on a renault megane 1.5 or to buy my own car and insure it (Vauxhall corsa 1.2)? Thanks

Auto insurance for a 19 yr old with a 1989 corvette?

My uncle is handing his 1989 C3 Corvette over to me as a present for getting my license.. I was wondering how much insurance would probably run me..I'm 19. College Student. Good GPA. Employed. I Live in Vegas if that helps. Thanks much!

How much has disability insurance rates increased in the last 5 years? 10 years?

I am 30 years old female trying to decide whether I can afford disability insurance with the noncancelable.

What is the best and cheapest car insurance for a first time driver?

I have been driving for about 3 years now. And now I am saving up for my first car. I just want to know whats the best car insurance because I know its gonna be pricey because I am a first time driver and under 25. What do you suggest I should try? I am still doing my research regardless but I want to be prepared to pay for at least 6 months in advance because I am still in college as we speak. I just don't want to worry about that every month when I get the car. Thank you !!

Car accident insurance?

Today someone backed into my car while parked damaging it. We exchanged insurance info and I called my insurance company and let them know and gave them his info. Does he still have the option to pay the for the damages in cash or does he have to go through insurance now that i let them know. He didn't specify if he wanted to go through insurance or pay in cash. I just want to know if i eliminated his option of paying in cash by calling my insurance. I feel bad if that's the case.

Total loss and State farm auto insurance?

I had a collision a few weeks before and it is classified as collision damage. I received an estimate at a body shop who initially provided an estimate of $xxxxx/- and said that the insurance company has agreed to pay them and a delivery date was given. Now, things have changed in the middle and the body shop manager tells me a new stories of additional things that went wrong due to collision (all of a sudden) and that the insurance agent after inspection wants to call it a total loss based on this new estimate. My insurance company- State farm wants it to call a total loss which I doubt given the extent of repair it might take for the minor damage in the front fender alone. Now, here are my questions. I now have suspicion on the integrity of the body shop as well the trick palyed in declaring total loss. 1. Can I have a second opinion at a different body shop? Does State farm allow that? 2. If the repair cost is more than the ACV, and if I still wish to keep the car, can I negotiate for the max amount less deductible that State farm is willing to pay the body shop (xx% of the max amount that state farm is willing to pay before declaring total loss) and I take care of the remaining cost? Your input is appreciated. Thanks, NS""

Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google"",I suggest that you visit this internet site where one can get quotes from different companies:""

Car insurance in America for non citizens on holiday?

I have a few questions about car insurance in America for non citizens. I am going to the USA this summer and will be driving alot.I have car insurance on my own car and have a full license and an international driving permit.Do i have to get insurance on the car in america or will my own insurance in ireland cover it or will i have to start another policy with an american company?Will this cost alot?My insurance here is not expensive and ive never been in an accident or made any claims.Is it possible to be put on my friends insurance as a driver and if so how much would this be cheaper then buying my own insurance?Any information would be great, i am very confused on the matter.""

Can I drive under my parents insurance?

Ill be driving my dad's car, and he has insurance, so is it possible if I can drive the car without me buying the insurance?""

Whats the different between Car Insurance and Breakout Cover?

Thought It should be normally include in the Car Insurance.

Is the discount rate for car insurance for students GPA cumulative?

I am in California and my semester GPA fell a little under 3.0 but my cumulative is still 3.0 will that affect my car insurance discount? And if so by how much?

Why is van insurance so much more than car insurance?

i have a VW POLO mk2, 1.3. im trying to by a vauxhall rascal 970cc and the insurance is more than double. why? the van insurance is quoted at 1400 pounds best. its for social use only, minimum mileage with no tools. its crazy. the polo was only 480 pounds.""

Will Car Insurance Fees Go Up?

So recently i was pulled over for speeding. 50 in a 45. Will my fines go up for just being 5+ the limit? If so how much do you think? Also I'm 16 -Thanks

Auto Insurance Penalities In Ky?

If you were without a car and insurance for a period of time, (2 years ) how can you get penalities for not having auto insurance. How do you insure something you don't have?""

Proof of insurance?

My friend wants to use my car for his driving test here in california. I know the DMV will ask for proof of insurance. I have the insurance card in my glovebox, and am under my parents insurance, but im not the actual insurance holder with my name on the card. Im just a driver under there insurance. Is my friend still able to use my car, even though im not the primary insurance holder, just a driver on the policy? Do the parents have to be there in order for it to take place?""

What is the cheapest car insurance ?

Right what it is , i lost my license for a CD10, Which is driving without due care and attention , Yes i know what you are all thinking and i have learned my lesson, I appreciate that i do have to pay loads more on insurance but my question is does anyone know a company who does cheap insurance for a convicted driver, Many Thanks in advance""

Nissan skyline insurance and price?

ok im 16 and wondering how much a 1990's nissan skyline cost and how much the insurance cost. im 16 a male and has never been in trouble with the police actually my dad was an officer. this is my first car...

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

How much will car insurance be for my 146 year old mother?

Is there a classic car insurance company that doesnt require you to be a certain age?

without 5 year license restriction also. i need to find one that will cover an 18 year old with a clean record.

""Where is houston, tx is there an affordable OBGYN clinic?""

I do not have insurance, but need to get in to have an obgyn exam. Does anyone know where the most affordable place would be, and no do not suggest planned parenthood. They are on a sliding schedule, but apparently I make too much money which is a crock of crap.""

Insurance on a 1998-1999 Mitsubishi eclipse GSX at age 16?

Alright so I am 14 right now. In 2 years I will be driving, and I am very into cars. I am looking to purchase a 1998-1999 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX. Since an eclipse is considered a sports car how much would much insurance be a month? Imagine I have a perfect status (No wrecks etc., and above a 3.5 GPA). Also if I get an Eclipse GS is that still considered a sports car since it is not AWD, and is not turbocharged?""

What is the best car insurance place for a 2004 mitsubishi eclipse GT??

im trying to find a low monthly payment on insurance for the mitsubishi most i found have been about 300 i know there cheaper out there tha why im asking maybe if someone owns one and how much they pay.. im a female so it gonna be a lil cheaper neways but im 20 so it gonna be a lil higher can anyone tell me please thank you

Sent a fake transcript to a car insurance for good student discount?

So me like an idiot sent a transcript from my college to Geico car insurance and it was altered. I thought that in the next semester, i can be able to make it all up. the altered transcript had 2 C's 2 A's and 1 B. What can i do now? I am really afraid because I really don't know what to do anymore. I feel like committing suicide because of this. What should i do? My original gpa for the transcript was 2.50""

Can I own two cars and insure them through different insurance companies?

Can I own two cars and insure them through different insurance companies?

How much is it likely to cost as a first time driver on familys car insurance?

Im nearly ready to take my driving test in a couple of month or so. Im 25 and hoping to pass first time in sept/oct 2012. My sister and also my brother in law are due to re-insure there cars in the next few months and are thinking about putting me on there insurance on either car fiat 500 or nisan micra. I will be not driving either car full time, just as and when. How much is it likelyto cost on top there normal insurance. Both have been driving for years with no claims as far as i know. Bit just an average amount will bw great""

Car insurance for age 17?

Well going sound awkward but i want a car without out parents knowing, been working for 2 years got enough money can prove to insurers where i got the money from im 17 and is it possible to get insurance at my address (real address where i auctally live) but i want the paperworks to be sent to another address or they contact me by email because family wants me to get a car when im 25 however im going uni so i really need a car also im not going to any fraud everything will be legit just need to make sure if i can insurance and only i know about it thanks""

Will obamacare lower health insurance premiums?

how will forcing more people to purchase a finite resource (increasing demand) cause the price to go down?

What is the cheapest auto insurance?

Hi thanks for taking your time to answer this question... I have geico right now, but dont think its the cheapest insurance company I have... I dont really care if customer service is bad, as long as its cheap!!! so please tell me... WHATS A CHEAP INSURANCE COMPANY??? lol""

Car insurance?

I have only liability insurance. If I rented a car will liability only insurance cover the car if I got in an accident or do I need to have full coverage?

Cheapest car insurance for young driver please?

I'm a 17 year old male from England and have a full uk licence i was just wondering what sort of prices other people have been getting for their insurance and which companys are the cheapest to go through any help would be appreciated. Thanks for looking at my question and answering :)

Cheapest car insurance in Massachusetts for a new driver?

I'm buying a car soon and will need insurance too.

""Got my first speeding ticket, will my insurance go up?

Im 20yrs old if that matters.. And this is only my first ticket. I was going 80mph on a 70mph. Will my insurance go up? If u know please tell me. I have state farm.

Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?

I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google"",I suggest that you visit this internet site where one can get quotes from different companies:""

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/blue-light-insurance-quotes-claire-estrada/"

[iannoyinglysweetstudent-blog]

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

"Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://freeinsurancequotes.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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A question about car insurance?

My mom is afraid of her car insurance going up once I get my license, so she wants me to get the car in my name and get my own insurance, but can I still get my license first before all of that? What would be the sequence of which to obtain first? Thanks!""

What is the cheapest car insurer for a 23yr old guy?

Obviously in the UK, so please no irritating as hell Try Patriot Insurance based in Washington ... So far, Zurich appears to be the cheapest. But i'm guessing we can go lower. Im trying to insure a 1997 Fiesta, 1.2, 3 door with immobiliser. Only doing 1000 miles or less each year. I have been out of driving now for 5 years. Can anyone recommend a cheap-as-chips car insurer? - It's ridiculous how just third party costs more than the car itself. My best qoute is around 580 - for third party ONLY. - A p*ss take. Thanks for your help.""

Heallth insurance for the self employed?

I need dental and health insurance for an affordable price. I am unmarried.... what can I do? who offers it? how much will it cost?

Best health insurance for grad students?

My fiancee and I are both graduate students and are looking to get health insurance in the next 6 months. The health insurance plan of the university we attend is terrible. Does anyone know any tips on finding a good health insurance company/plan? I don't even know where to begin! Thanks!

Does getting a speeding ticket increase my insurance rates?

As an 18-year old driver, does getting a speeding ticket (cited at 5 mph over the speed limit) add points to my license (in Michigan) or affect my insurance? When I got pulled ...show more""

Will a B average my freshman year apply to an auto insurance discount?

I had a 3.2 last year (my freshman) year, and as of now I have about a 2.5. I'll be getting my car soon, so if I can't bring it up by then, will they accept last year's GPA so I can get a 10% discount?""

Which life insurance company is the best.?

Which life insurance company is the best?

Where can i get cheap car insurance?

Ive tried compare the market and a few of the other leading companies but they all a bit to high for me - whats so annoying is when i find one thats suitable it ends up higher than the listed price. Anyone know of a good one

How much do you pay for your car insurance? 10pts?

I have Geico and my vehicle is a lease...Jeep Liberty 05...I was charged $55.72 for this months insurance, it's always low but UM wtf??? How much are you paying? Do you own your vehicle/ lease? Year /Model? Thanks!""

Does car insurance cost the same for every car?

I'm 18 and right now I have 800 for a car, but the one I want is 4000, would the car insurance on that cost more than the 800 one?""

Can somebody help me with Car Insurance?

Earlier this month I was added onto my Dad's car insurance policy as a named driver fully comp. Now I need to cancel it (long story) and was wondering, would I have to pay for the following months insurance? Or will I get some money back?""

Not paying car insurance?

I have currently had my permit for 13 months and I am 20 years old. My mother inlaw was telling me I could get something called my fleet affidavids license and I wouldn't have to cover insurance on the car i'm driving as long as I have the same last name that is on the insurance. I honestly can't be expected to pay insurance when i'm just now getting my license and had no transportation what so ever to get a job to make money for insurance. Does anybody know anything about fleet affidavids license or have any information that might help me out? I can't afford insurance.

""If u have state farm and ur wanting to get ur hardship license at 15, how much a month would insurance cost?

i am about to be 14 and in a year i want to get my hardship license and i REALLY want a camero..... i have been dreaming about mustangs and cameros and chargers in general for as long as i can remember..... my parents say that i cant get a camero or any sports car bc the insurance rate will be raging!!!! but i really wanna work this out so can you please tell me about how much More it would cost a month for insurance when i turn 15?

Accident and no car insurance?

I live in Hawaii and i got in to a one car accident with my two kids. my daughter was flown off to another island with Air Ambulance and was in ICU at Queens Hospital for a two days. Were are all alive and well but im stuck with a 70,000 medical bill. My truck that was in the accident had no car insurance because i just brought it and my children and i are on MedQuest(medical through the state) Please help me on how to get my bill payed for. thank you""

Help on car insurance.?

I am 17 yrs old. I am about to get a 2008 Honda accord but right now I drive a 2002 Cadillac escalade. my insurance is $130 a month right now and I was wondering if it would raise it? the escalade is an SUV, & it has a v8. the accord is ofcourse a car and its a 4 cylinder! ( if that makes a difference) thank you to all that answer! :)""

Whos the cheapest car insurance companys for first time drivers?

Whos the cheapest car insurance companys for first time drivers?

Can you add car insurance after an accident?

i hit my friend tonight but i never added insurance to my truck that i bought two weeks ago. I called the 24 hour insurance support and told them that i had bought the truck tonight and they said i am covered for 3 days but i have to call my agent tomorrow to set up all the coverage and payments. If i call the agent in the morning and tell them i got into an accident will i be covered? i live in IL.

1999 toyota camry insurance cost?

1999 toyota camry insurance cost?

For Massachusettes drivers-did anyone else's insurance skyrocket when the new rates came out last month?

with the new credit system my rate went up over $700 and I am not happy!!

Do I really need travelers insurance?

We are taking a trip from Oregon to Cancun Mexico soon and am wondering if I should purchase travelers insurance. We are going to purchase airline tickets directly from Delta Airlines and also from our chosen hotel. I'm thinking that if there are any problems, the airline and hotel would take care of it. What are your thoughts?""

Do I need to have insurance before buying a car?

I canceled my car insurance a year ago, because I didn't have a car. Now I am ready to buy one again. Do I need to have insurance BEFORE buying the car, so I can drive it home? Or do I wait until after wards so I know what type of car to insure. I will be buying the car from the state auto auction if that makes a difference.""

Is it a legal requirement to advise your car insurance company of a speeding fine?

My 24 year old son has his car insurance renewal coming up soon, and unfortunately he picked up a fixed penalty speeding fine and 3 points on his licence for this first misdemeanour he has had in 4 years of driving. With his insurance still over 1000 for a 10 year old Rover 25! he doesn't really want anything to make this cost any more (it's not as if it is a serious offence). However, I have told him it is best to advise his insurance company of this offence as if they find out in future renewal years he has withheld this information, he may be penalised worse. What's the legal standpoint on this matter? Keep schtum or confess?""

""Average cost of homeowners insurance in League City, Texas?""

What is the average cost of home owner's insurance for the league city area? Including wind storm and flood since both is required for the area we are moving into? Home is for sale at 124,000 and we are trying to estimate costs.""

Cheapest auto insurance?

Cheapest auto insurance?

Should I call my insurance company?

Last fall I hit a raccoon really hard and it ruined my front spoiler and my radiator, the damage was under my deductable so I decided to just buy the parts on my own. Since I don't drive the car in the winter I parked the car over the winter I decided to just put the car into storage and buy the parts in the spring, so I bought the parts, installed them and now I found out that my motor is ruined from the car overheating after I hit the raccoon. and its going to cost a ton of money to get everything fixed on this car. Would I be able to claim something like this even though it happened 6 months ago?""

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

Car insurance help ok so i am going to be a first year driver?

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Is car insurance cheaper when changing from 20 to 21 in age?

What is a good place to get cheap SR-22 Insurance in the state of Utah?

What is a good place to get cheap SR-22 Insurance in the state of Utah?

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GEICO sux

Lexus Tail lights and Angel Eye front lights - Insurance?

So im thinking about getting these for car my, does anybody know how much the insurance will go up by if i get them, thanks""

Cheapest car insurance for speeding violations.?

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""Life Insurance -- Is a 78 year old woman too old to get life insurance? If not, who are the better providers?""

I've made preliminary inquiries to get life insurance for a 78 year-old female, however, I get the standard response of no because of her age and the fact that she has been hospitalized in the last year and has pre-existing conditions (COPD, high blood pressure, arhythmia). My sense, however, is that there may be life insurance companies out there with more accomodating terms for senior citizens. If you know of any such companies, or are experienced enough in life insurance to give a definitive no- it's not possible response, please let me know. What are our alternatives, if any?""

What are my options for affordable health insurance in Massachusetts?

I graduated with my Masters in Library Sciences in May, and am only covered under my mom's health ins. until February. I am trying to avoid a lapse in coverage. Please help!""

Whats the average pay for Car or Auto Insurance ??

What is the average amount that people pay for Car Insurance a month for one car?????? PLEASE SOMEONE ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Will my wreck affect my dads insurance rates?

I'm on my step dads insurance on his buisness truck. If I got into a wreck would it affect his insurance rates or just mine.

Will my car insurance rates go up?

A year ago, I got into an accident that was my fault. My insurance rates went up. Recently they dropped but at school, I was pulling out of a parking space and I ran into another girl's car. Will my insurance rates go up if she put in a claim? If so, how much. Any thoughts? What should I do?""

Discount Insurance Plans?

Ameriplan.....and others...how do they compare to regualr insurance. Money is short, don't qualify for medicaid...so I'm thinking any discount will be better than nothing, but I don't want to waste my money even if it is as low as $29.95 Honest reviews please!!!""

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? how old are you? what kind of deductable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance?""

Best individual health insurance plan?

My husband and I just found out that his company is raising our medical insurance rates from $212 a month to $400 a month, so we are trying to shop around for the best rates. We have found some, but hardly any include maternity benefits, and we want that parachute just in case any accidents happen. Is there any plans out there cheaper than $400 with maternity, or should we just hope we don't get pregnant for a couple of years? (We plan to switch insurance in 2 years when I get a teaching job)""

How much would the car insurance cost on an 87 Jeep Cherokee?

Trying to get info on what Im looking at insurance wise on the car Im interested in. Its an 87 Jeep Cherokee 4 wheel drive. Completely stock other then that.

Liability Insurance for an Electrician?

I am an electrician and would like to get liability insurance because I do a lot of jobs on my own. Where can I find this? And is there an inexpensive plan? I live in New Hampshire.

Gastric Bypass and Insurance?

Who should I try and contact first? a surgeon or my insurance company?

Where i can find the cheapest car insurance rates for my 18 year old daughter? What I've seen so far is 2 $$$$

Where i can find the cheapest car insurance rates for my 18 year old daughter? What I've seen so far is 2 $$$$

Does anyone know where I can get cheap car insurance for a 26 year old first time driver in the UK?

I have tried a few comparison sites but they come back with 2000 and up. I have tried adding my Dad and my sister but it does not make much difference, should I add more people? Or am I going to the wrong sites? Thank you in advance for any responses.""

Fastest accelerating car in the insurance group 1-3?

Hello, I am going to be turning 17 shortly and would like some advise on which car that would be very responsive and quick. My budget for the car itself is 1450 but there could be a bit of flexibility. As I am sure you all know, insurance for new drivers is very high, so I want something in between groups one and three as I believe that is the area that I can afford. Could I also please ask for serious answers. I am not not wanting to drive irresponsibly, if that is a worry to some contributors. Thanks.""

Where to go for cheap car insurance for a young driver?

I am 16 yr old and passed my test 1 month ago! I have done my pass plus too! The best quote i have found is $1200 and that is without telling them i have done my pass plus! It was also for third party fire and theft! Can someone recommend a cheap insurance company. Thanks!

How to get the best quotes in car insurance?

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""I am driving from OK to TX tonight, and have active car insurance, but expired paper insurance, please help!?""

Okay, my car insurace is active, up to date, but I did not receive a paper copy of my insurance in the mail. I tried to print it out but my printer is jammed. I do have the expired proof of insurance in the car...if I get pulled over for any reason when driving from OK to TX, how much trouble will I get into? Thanks for any insight on this!""

Insurance and child support?

If my husband provides insurance through his work to his daughter and is also paying child support on her is he going to be responsible for the co-pay everytime she goes to the doctor? His daughter also has a secondary insurance through the state that her mom collects we were just wondering if the secondary insurance would pay or who would be responsible. The mother or him???

Question about car insurance?

I'm wondering something about car insurance. I am a 17 year old male, (turning 18 in 1 month) and have been driving a 2001 Hyundai accent since October. I am insured with esurance, and have liability only. I have a clean driving record. My monthly insurance is $197. I am on my parents policy. When I first called to get a quote, (cheapest company for me) it was around 120 a month, but then they got the VIN number and of course it went up because it knew exactly what car it was. Of course car insurance is very expensive for a male my age. My question is that I'm trying to save money to buy a jeep wrangler this summer. Will probably be a year 1997-2003. I want to know about how much it would cost to insure the jeep. I hear mixed responses about the cost to insure a wrangler, iv heard it's expensive because of the high theft rate and roll over chances. I know of course I don't know how much it will be exactly, considering I don't have a VIN number for the jeep wrangler. I get extremely expensive quotes when I search online, and the are all completely off. My parents policy has probably 4 or 5 cars on it and I am excluded off everyone's car. My sister has been in 2 wrecks and 2 speeding tickets, which I heard makes my insurance increase also. Anyone who has a general idea about cost for me to insure a jeep wrangler, thank you.""

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

How much will a long lapse in my car insurance coverage cost me (on average) when I try to get inusrance again

And by long I mean between 6-12 months.

""How much is average for childcare? I have a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a 8mth old. About 8 hr/5days a week?""

I'll explain a little more. I own a duplex which I rent out the top of while my husband and I live down stairs. The renters upstairs have been my friends for a long time and they needed an apartment so we rented to them for $535 a month. After a year we agreed to trade daycare for rent so I could go back to work full time. The arangment has gone from no cash exchanged to us paying their car insurance ($90/month) the water bill ($50/month), the hot water ($35/month), an extra $190 in cash per month along with the no rent income ($535/month). We also give them about $60 in random cash when they ask for help. I provide the formula, diapers and wipes and she provides the food. The kids are upstairs from 11am to 5:30pm and she refuses to take them earlier even though if she did I could get a better schedual. I trust the woman and her son is the same age as my oldest. But there are also some serious disipline issues too. (My four year old now says bad words.) I need some advice""

Whats higher in cost car insurance or van insurance at 19 years old?

just a little argument what would cost more car insurance or van insurance

What does employer sponsored health insurance means?

I know my company offers health insurance but dont understand what sponsored means. Also if I apply for a low income health plan through the state will I be disqualified because the company I work for offers health insurance. FYI the rates that my company offers are insanely high and I cant afford them.

What is the average insurance on a motorbike?

Hi I would like to know what the insurance is on a bike, preferably a 'Yamaha YZF R125' Thanks xx""

Renting a car for the first time- do I have to buy insurance bc my personal car insurance is not in my name?

My car and car insurance are under my fiancees name. I will be renting a car on my own. Do I have to buy the insurance because it's not in my name?

How much do you pay for motorcycle insurance?

I would like to know how much you pay for motorcycle insurance. If you could, in your answer, please state how much you pay, how old you are, and what size you bike is. Also say if it is a crotch rocket a cruiser....etc. I am seventeen and wondering what a roundabout insurance quote would be for me.""

""We are looking to buy a new home it cost about 180,000 dollars my husband makes about 36,000 dollars a year?""

could we get this home does he make enough i also have a down payment of 18,000 dollars""

Is there insurance for Antique Cars?

Hi, I have a 1971 chevrolet camaro. Wanted to ask if there was insurance for antique cars? I know i could just get liability for this car but i was wondering if i could get better coverage for my vehicle? Thanks.""

Is there anyone on their parents car insurance ?

a few of my friends are and im wondering how much extra you have to pay to go on your parents car insurance rather than your own, thankyou""

""Does my auto insurance cover anyone driving, if they have no insurance themselves? thanks?""

Does my auto insurance cover anyone driving, if they have no insurance themselves? thanks?""

Will lawmakers eventually create a national health insurance exchange instead of the state based exchanges?

Also, is it possible still for health insurance companies to be given the freedom to sell their policies across state lines?""

Can I drive my uncle car but im under my grandmothers insurance?

I am under my grandmothers insurance and my uncle let me borrow one of his cars for a month. the car is under his insurance. if i was to get pulled over would i get into trouble for driving his car. all of his insurance information is in the car and his registration. and will i need to bring proof of me under my grandmothers insurance?

Whats the cheapest car insurance for someone that has points on the their driving record.?

Whats the cheapest car insurance for someone that has points on the their driving record.?

I got a citation for no proof of insurance and have a couple questions..?

so my first citation, annnd i was wondering if i take traffic school do i still have to pay the $1,000 fine for not having insurance at the time? also if i sell me car before the court date does that help ? if not what can i do to not pay because im broke no job and no money , willing to do community service.. can i do that for this kinda thing?""

How and where do i find 'cheaper' car insurance? UK?

Im 20 , female and I will be 21 by time I get a car (hopefully). I really don't know where to find cheaper insurance. I tried confused.com but the max price is 3000! my friends who are younger than me get it at like 1500 and I don't know why or how. Also if I offer to pay the insurance in one lump sum , would it be cheaper? I'm looking for a Vauxhall corsa between 1.1 and 1.2 or maybe even lower engine. What other ways to get a cheaper quote? Please help. Driving is all I ever wanted to do and I might have a chance at it in this summer.""

Would insurance be high on an impala ss?

I'm 18, I have a safe driving record (so far), I've completed driving school as well as defensive driving (it gives me a discount), if it helps. I'm thinking about buying an impala ss. I can afford it as far as the payments go, and my parents have agreed to pay the insurance if it's reasonable . So what am I looking at, guys?""

Car insurance over 2 years break?

i havent had any car insurance for 2 and half years but if i go back to whom i was insured with will i be able to retieve my no claims discount of 70%

Where is the best place for cheap car insurance for young drivers?

Hi there, I just bought a Renault Clio 1.2 Expression 52 plate and when i try get insurance just on my name its giving me quotes like 4555 is it becuase i am only 19 years old and i just passed my test 4 month ago ? i have been trying loads of comparassion websites but now that i have checked so many websites admiral, bell and elephant have stopped giving me quotes. could somebody recommend any good car insurance companys ? Thanks""

Cheap cars with cheap insurance?

I'm learning to drive soon, BUT every member of my family and I are all broke. Long story short, I need some examples of cars that are cheap to buy, have cheap insurance, run well, and don't drink fuel like a goldfish in water (as I will be using it to get to college and back then later uni and back). PS, I live in England, so no cars that are about as rare as an honest politician in this lovely rainy country- even if it is the best car in the world, I'm way too lazy to search for it.""

If 2 cars fall into the same insurance group will they cost more or less the same?

regardless of how much fuel they use? I ask because I have been looking at both the Vauxall Corsa and Astra, and both models fall into insurance group 4 but the Astra is a 1.4L and the Corsa a 1.3L (They are diesel versions).""

1 Month Car Insurance?

I'm looking to insure a car for 1 month only, I have did all the search engine checks but most sites want 180 + which is far too expensive. I'm 41 and have held licence 20+ years so no young driver problems. Any ideas??????""

If i pay more of a down payment on my insurance will i get a lower premium?

Cost for the car im looking at monthly is $398, they want a $401 down payment, if i pay $501 will it take it down?""

Where to get cheap insurance for at risk drivers?

Well I had an 08 chevy cobalt (dad was paying for it) & me & my friends were always stupid & I was always doing stupid things. Totaled it. & I got 5 points on my license. I got a Job & my mom agreed shed pay for half the payments on a car. I liked the 2013 dodge darts bc they were really good on gas, looked cool, & had a lot of room. Well the insurance for that was gonna be 900 a month through Allstate. Which is crazy. I can afford 1-150 a month for insurance. Anywhere I could go to get a cheap car insurance? Within my price range for an at risk driver? & I probably won't buy the dart, I was thinking like an 07 civic or eclipse or something on the lines of that""

In California does it state anywhere in family law divorce forms that a spouce has to have insurance !?

cont..... -----------> on the other party ? (do i half to have my ex. on my Ins. policy (health)

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

What Insurance is the cheapest for teenagers in texas?

What Insurance is the cheapest for teenagers in texas?

My car insurance wont cover me. what can i do?

I rear ended a lady on the 18th of sep 2013 in riverside california. I thought i was covered by my insurance because my dad said it would be better if i got insurance through him. Its my car and its on his policy but i was not on the policy this whole time. But heres the thing, a farmers insurance agent told my dad that anyone would be covered so long as he knew they were driving the car. So my question is... what can i do? My dad was lied to by this agent and we have no proof that she did. We will be going in to speak with her today and will try to get the conversation recorded, we hope to get a confession that way. But do you have any other tips?""

How much for basic auto insurance in Canada?

I am driving my car from BC to Waterloo, ON. back for school. I was wondering, in this case, which province's auto insurance I am supposed to get. Can I drive around in Ontario for more than four months with ICBC insurance? Or Do I have to get the new Ontario insurance? In BC I am still N, which is equivalent of G2, and I currently drove for closely three years. Another thing was, how much would the basic insurance cost a month? Is there any big difference between BC and Ontario?""

Salvage title car insurance claim settlement?

I purchased the car with a salvage title over a year ago. I have full coverage with Progressive on my 2003 honda accord ex with 64k, in a recent ice storm my wife totaled the car. The ...show more""

""What would you do? Really want a baby, but afraid of losing insurance.?""

I know this is just for my husband and me to decide, but I'd like to hear what other people would do. We really want to have a baby (we've had two losses in the past). We've paid off our bills and have some savings for a house (we'd like to buy one in about 5 years). The only thing stopping us now is that his job can be unstable and, although we'll continue to be fine financially, I'm afraid of losing insurance. Would you take the risk?""

What is the cheapest/best home insurance right now?

my home insurance just went up from roughly $800 to $1300 a year! Is their a better, more affordable one out there? Thanks""

""If I make a claim using my company car insurance, does that affect my personal insurance reputation?""

I recently got into a little fender bender using my company car. The other driver wasn't present, so I left a note. He called, and I followed through by filing a claim with the insurance company. I'm worried, though, that my personal insurance reputation/rating is going to be affected because of this claim with my company car. Any information you can provide would b helpful.""

Advice on Insurance policys?

What policy's is best for someone in full time work - single - no kids -No debt.- rented Accommodation - in 30s How would you list these policy's of being important. There maybe a policy missed out if so please send me some advice.. Private Health Insurance Income Protection Life Insurance Accident, sickness and unemployment Private Pension Critical Illness Insurance""

Is there an insurance that will insure me and not my car?

my friend had an insurance that insured just him for any car he was driving idk what it was called but it was only for ohio residents anyway(im in pa) ....how would it work?

What car for First car with cheap insurance?

im 17 and i want to get one of the following cars for my 1st car Vauxhall Corsa C 1.2l/Ford Fiesta zetec (Mk6)/volkswagen golf 1.4L (mk4) and my budget is 1200 and i want a car with cheap insurance and how much will i have to pay and can i pay monthly

What kind of medical insurance can an unemployed 19 year old get?

I am 19, currently unemployed and i am living with my mom. I go to the doctor often but we are becoming pretty broke. What medical insurance can i get that can lower the cost of doctor visits and prescriptions. Ive already tried medi-cal but i have a share of cost for some reason.""

How much does flood insurance cost?

How much does flood insurance cost, as well as wind insurance?""

How can I get cheaper motorbike insurance?

I know postcode makes it cheaper/dearer, but can anyone Please tell me what else puts the price up? Thanks""

What's the cheapest insurance for a used 50k miles 02 Mitsubishi Eclipse?

I live in California, great driving record, getting a used 02 Eclipse 50k miles Automatic. How much is the cheapest insurance and what company do you recommend? (I currently pay $60/month for my Mitsubishi Mirage 2000 De Coupe, I would like a similar / cheaper rate).. any ideas on this?""

""Two insurance quotes, one car?""

Is it possible for me and my brother to have two insurance quotes on the car, or do I have to go on his insurance? He is already insured on the car? Thanks :)""

Health Insurance Not Taken Out from Check?

I got an extra 84 bucks in my check bc they didn't take out for health insurance? Was this just a mistake?

Car insurance question...?

If you have insurance on a car, is the car covered in a wreck no matter who's driving it?""

Insurance question: Does anyone know?

An insurance policy that covers several individuals, often sharing common professions, is called a(n) _____________ policy.""

What car has the cheapest insurance?

For a 17 year old.. (MALE)

Affordable Health Insurance in California?

We're TTC and having a bit of trouble so I was wondering if anyone could recommend a good health plan that covers maternity and possibly specialists.

Should I get a 1988 944s Porsche?

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Robbins Tennessee Cheap car insurance quotes zip 37852

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[cyclingpacificthoughts]

The Kindness of Strangers

Distance Cycled: 412km (256miles) Distance Climbed: 4,282m (14,049ft)

Joe and I have been blown away by the friendliness and hospitality of those we’ve met in British Columbia. Perhaps we’re used to the coldness of Londoners and the eyes down, avoid all conversation mentality of public transport there. 

We found almost everyone to be extremely welcoming, willing to strike up a conversation or just say hello without becoming overly intrusive. If however you do engage you can find yourself discussing diverse topics from politics to a British favourite; the weather.

Perhaps we look slightly lost or disheveled and people take pity, perhaps it has something to do with our Alzheimer’s Society cycling tops, or more likely, perhaps people are just really nice when you stop and take the time to talk to them. It also helps that Joe is much more inclined than I to just ask the nearest person while I’m trying to make sense of my Garmin or map. This usually results in a range of good advice to extreme generosity.

A big thank you to Bill and Shelly, Rosemary, Barry and Phyllis, Sam and Kathy, Tim and Diana, for their help and all the other people who stoped to talk or offer encouragement/advice.

Tuesday October 3rd 2017 Tour Day 4 Cycle Day 1: Vancouver to Porpoise Bay

Our introduction to Canada couldn’t have got off to a better start. Through pure chance (and the fact that their house was walking distance to our bike shop) we spent the first 3 nights in Vancouver at Bill and Shelly’s AirBnB. One of the nicest couples you could meet, upon discovering that we required an extra evening than originally planed to take in some bike mechanic lessons, they extended their own spare bedroom to us as the basement apartment was booked. They also extended an invited to dinner that evening (incredible lamb burgers), the perfect last super before disembarking. Our luck continued as this meant we met Sam, a neighbour who now spends most of his time on Denman Island, but happened to be in town. He almost immediately offered a place to stay should we make the small detour off Vancouver Island.

The Last Supper: Bill, Sam, and Shelly.

Not done, the following morning Shelly cooked us breakfast to see us on our way, including some homemade Kombucha, a South Korean fermented drink, both delicious and healthy! Perhaps a pop up in London to follow…

Setting off there was some adjustment to getting used to the weight of all the gear hanging off the bikes, which at first felt like our nimble bikes had turned into oil tankers.

First day smiles.

We’d not even made it out of Vancouver when at Prospect Point, just prior to crossing Lions Gate bridge we stoped for a quick photo opp. Here we got chatting to a British woman named Rosemary Angil. It turned out that her mother in law had recently died having suffered from Alzheimer’s. She asked for our details and when we next had Wi-Fi discovered she’d made a significant donation. Thank you Rosemary!

A post shared by Kit MacInnes-Manby (@kitty_magic) on Oct 4, 2017 at 8:06pm PDT

Prospect Point - Leaving Vancouver.

As a brief aside, a big thank you to all of you who have also donated, I’ll be thanking you all in person when I get the chance.

Spirits high we set off and enjoyed a scenic ride though West Vancouver, stumbling across Gleneagles Golf Course along the way up to Horseshoe Bay.

Much easier to get a tee time here.

Having arrived 7 minutes too late for the midday ferry, with bright sunshine and glorious bay views we begrudgingly settled into a burger and pint to toast our first 1% of the trip.

The 2.15 ferry was waiting, at the dock another cyclist told us where to wait. We waited, and waited some more, when 2.13 struck, we decide to double check… Turns out we were in the wrong loading bay and had just missed it again! 4.30 was the next one, which while annoying didn’t appear too bad as the sun was still shining and the park looked appealing.

This extended delay also gave me the opportunity to talk to two backpackers who spend their time crossing the country for work. They were selling dried sage, lavender, and other herbs which I exchanged for the cost of a ferry ticket so they could get home. He told me something about the spirituality of what I was doing and it would help take my energy with me… …I’m not sure about all that but it has kept my clothes smelling nice and fresh so I take that as a win!

BC - Many ferries, which are ideal at breaking up rides and meeting new people.

Finally on the ferry and off the other side we faced a not too daunting 25km ride to Porpoise Bay. As is typical of a ferry exit we were met with an immediate and steep climb, however I’ve thus found that this serves the purpose of warming up the legs again. The final stretch seemed fine until we got to Sechelt just as the sun was setting.

Which while beautiful meant cycling the last few km in the dark. Secondly we both began to “bonk” as we clearly hadn’t been fuelling ourselves enough. This resulted in a somewhat unpleasant short in distance but long in mind final 30mins.

Things got worse as having successfully got the tent up in the dark, with dinner on the go, a park ranger turned up and informed us that we were not in the designated camping area. This designated area was a whopping 25m from where we were. Despite not a single other person being there (nor did we see one before we set off) we were forced to decamp and move. All in all not the best end to our first day on the road.

Wednesday October 4th 2017 Tour Day 5 Cycle Day 2: Porpoise Bay to Lang Bay

Another beautiful morning and Joe’s porridge later we set off continuing on the aptly named “Sunshine Coast”.

The views from Porpoise Bay.

We set off with the initial goal of Powel River but it turns out the Sunshine Coast while sunny, is rather lumpy. Joe quickly established himself as KOM taking all the mountain points, dancing up hills like a mountain goat. We made it to Madeira Park at which point we were both thinking that we may have been slightly naive in how easy it would be to cycle fully loaded bikes 2000 miles.

Alarm bells should have been ringing when my check in luggage was 20kg (without my rather considerable camera gear as carry on). Add to this the 14kg bikes (the price of robustness) and my own weight and you’re looking at somewhere between 110-120kg, or one Ed “Chunk” Monkley that I’ve got to lug up every hill!

Ed in his natural habitat.

(I’ve since weighed myself at a truck stop which came out at 300lbs equating to 136kg - however this was probably rounded to the nearest 50lbs)

The slogan quickly became what goes down must go up. As much as it was fun to carry large momentum down hills (and at times break the speed limit) it was almost always not worth it for the inevitable hill shortly afterwards.

It is also where we named out bikes. My steed has been dubbed Shirly the Surly, as I ask her at the bottom of each hill “Shirly, you can’t be serious”. Joe has named his Susan, as he’s “cuzin on suzin”.

Madeira Park offered a delicious pizza from a guy who had sacked off his consulting job that took him all over North America, to make pizza in this small and scenic corner of the world. With slightly tempered ambitions of Saltery Bay instead of Powel River we set off.

Pizza 🍕

It was on the Ferry from Earls Cove to Saltery Bay that we got chatting to Phyllis. When we told her what we were up to she told us about her own travels in Europe, including one evening spent in a park with her friend and a Scott (complete with Kilt) after their bags were stollen holding passports and traveler’s cheques. Having experienced her own share of stranger’s kindness along the way she insisted on putting us up.

Joe and I duly obliged and arrived to meet Phyllis and her husband Barry, where we were treated to our own lodge! After a quick swim in the bay to ease our aching legs we whiled away the evening hours over a few beers with our hosts before retiring to the lodge. Joe initially only making it as far as the sofa for bed.

Ice therapy.

Barry and Phyllis.

Thursday October 5th 2017 Tour Day 6 Cycle Day 3: Lang Bay to Denman Island (Part 1 | Part 2)

Joe whipped up some more pancakes for breakfast and after saying our goodbyes, feeling greatly refreshed we set our sites on Denman Island and our invitation to Sam’s. We were treated to some of the most scenic riding so far as the trees thinned out on the way to Powell River.

With about an hour to kill Joe popped into a secondhand bookstore (he picked up something roman as he’s predisposed to do) and walked out with another $5 donation to the cause. I made a brief trip to the bike shop as I’d adjusted my gears terribly and hadn’t been able to access many of them since Earl’s Cove. A quick pit stop at a local recommendation; Base Camp Coffee and it was onto the ferry.

Somewhere around here we reached our most northern point and the true start of our journey south. One would be tempted to think that it is all down hill from here. One would be wrong.

Knowing that Sam was out until late we took a bit of time to explore the coast line of Comox and stumbled upon another coffee stop (fuel of the cyclist) at Grind where we found an epic whey protein, peanut butter, banana milkshake which served as an excellent lunch and another fine view.

A casual and yet more scenic ride down to Denman Island ensued and ended by encountering a salmon roll while waiting for the ferry (think sausage roll). Sadly I would miss the following day’s offering of salmon wellington!

Felling somewhat tired we were pleased to discover a local vineyard en route and having never even heard of BC wine thought it rude not to.

Corlan Vineyard has been running for about 10 years now and has some delicious wines. Not that you can go out and buy any as it’s exclusively sold at the farm shop. We tried the red Marechal Foch (French / American hybrid) and the white Ortega. Sadly the blackberry and Sigerrebe wines were sold out but Pat the owner allowed us to go and pick some of the remaining blackberries from this year’s harvest to taste. I had to taste quite a few to make sure each one was as tasty as the last.

A bottle of red purchased it was on to Sam’s and we arrived to a fairy light lit wood cabin. Sam’s wife Kathy was just putting the finishing touches on some freshly made pizzas, topped with local produce, some of which came from their own garden. It’s tough to beat a welcome like that.

Sam and Kathy

Friday October 6th 2017 Tour Day 7 Cycle Day 4: Denman Island to Chemainus River Campsite

Following another great evening we made an early start for our longest ride yet - 140km.

Perhaps over confident from the previous day’s riding and the last 4 days good weather we set ourselves the ambition of Ladysmith or as far south as we could get. The first signs were encouraging as we fairly deleted kilometres, after 2h30 seeing off 60km along pleasurable flat costal roads. Stoping in a (don’t judge) McDonalds for a quick coffee and some wifi at Parksville we looked back with pride and thought we’d smash the next 60km in similar fashion. Oh hubris.

The following 60km were nothing like the first. The costal route gave way to highway 19 with no obvious alternative. The first rain of the trip descended and we spend what seemed like an age going up gradual gradients on small highway shoulders with 18 wheelers for company.

Highways - Fun.

Nanaimo has become a name etched in infamy for us as it seemed to stretch on forever and Ladysmith seemed to be forever just the other side. Some bike paths did appear but they were either so hilly or perturbed by tree routes as to be impractical. So much so that my tent decided it had had enough and got off the ride with my shoe subsequently attempting suicide to stop the torment.

Goodbye cruel world.

Ladysmith eventually arrived, food and warmth on the agenda. Wigwam Chinese seemed perfect, as it was the first restaurant we found.

Large quantities of Chinese later, with it still fairly early in the day, feeling much better for ourselves we pressed on south to Chemainus Campsite, offering much needed warm showers, a camp fire and what is becoming Joe’s trip speciality; cheesy pasta mixed with whatever we’ve managed to find that day.

Saturday October 7th 2017 Tour Day 8 Cycle Day 5: Chemainus Campsite to Victoria

Looking forward to our first rest day in Victoria it was a short ride to the Salt Spring Island ferry. The local coffee stop provided the next chance meeting. Tim, an absolute legend, who in his 71st year is still peddling around when he can. We talked the perils of leaving your bike unattended, the virtues of a helmet mirror (which we’ve finally purchased in Portland), and the joys of touring in general. Tim has cycled all over the North America and Europe, including two trips down the North Pacific Coast! What’s more he is a resident of one of the US’ best cycle spots; the San Juan Islands. Once Tim found out we were headed that way he insisted on having us to stay, another awesome act of generosity.

Fellow tourer and awesome human Tim.

Salt Spring Island itself is a lovely ride. Quiet roads, rolling hills and plenty of interesting stops. However It was described to me as the Hamptons of Vancouver so not without its downsides. This was confirmed at the local Saturday market where someone attempted to sell us kale crisps at $9/100g…

Checking out the local market.

Another ferry the other side into Swartz Bay to pick up the Lochside trail (the Scotts get everywhere) all the way into Victoria.

This essentially ended our British Columbia riding. BC had been a blast but also eye opening as to the scale of what we were taking on. I had expected this part of the trip to feel more like being out in the wilderness, however the roads and other infrastructure were excellent, which while convenient, was slightly disappointing (only very slightly). I guess I have to hand it to the Canadian government for managing to tame such rugged terrain, coming from BT I know we can’t even get decent broadband to some parts of London let alone the Outer Hebrides.

And Finally

A rest day in the BC capital Victoria, then on to San Juan and Washington State, tune in next time to find out more.