#tpoto spoilers

[deadguydeathmatch]

Dead Guy Death Match Round 2: Poll 26

[areinca]

something i wrote ages ago that feels like a tumblr post so i edited and posted it

LOVE NEVER DIES (tpoto sequel) SPOILERS AHEAD:

the most unrealistic part of Beneath a Moonless Sky is that it was able to happen at all. you know that i know that we know if Christine came back after Final Lair, after all the events that happened like "ok im back lets fuck", with Erik (the phantom of the opera, yes, that is his name let’s call him that he is not a ghost he is just a guy he says so himself, explicitly in the book) in the mental and emotional state he was in in Phantom and in that song in general, he would need at LEAST 9-10 business days to recover and process it i mean come on you really think he would be like "ok slay lets do it" after all the emotional turmoil of final lair even if he did agree because you also know that theres no way that he would agree to that, he literally told them to go now and leave him (paraphrased quote from final lair) but let's say for some reason he did, he would either pass out or shut down (erik.exe is not working fr) or completely fall apart because come on ALW did you watch phantom? did you watch final lair? you WROTE those songs. he would not be touching her and feeling her and hearing those ravishing refrains of the singing in her veins (paraphrased literal lyrics from beneath a moonless sky) he would be screaming crying eating furniture and you know it ALW come on ALW you can't tell me you DONT know it you WROTE PHANTOM

[misterradio]

tpoto book spoilers for REALSIES you have been warned

okay so i am not finished yet so idk if this will develop into something more comparable to the musical (edit: nothing did) but in the musical erik catches raoul and is like oh christine you have to either marry me and save raoul or say no and i will kill him

in the book he is like if you say no i will literally blow up this opera house and kill everyone in it including myself

HELLO !!!?????? the drastic measures here are insane. i gues technically raoul (and the persian) are caught by erik but by accident.

i like the details about how erik is like. a tinkerer. he likes inventing and building. i like that. but also he says that he would like to live in a normal house like anyone else but it makes me think that he would get bored and like change the house into something f--ked up LOL

his propensity for building death traps makes me think of how my brother would design dungeons all over a page when we were younger. also makes me think of jimbo from gloomy ruins everything who loves building things but everything he builds turns into a death machine by accident.

[upsddwn]

did nobody else think the masquerade scene in the last ep was totally unnecessary, after the musical episodes in riverdale i actually kind of hated it lol

[bloody-hellsing]

So I watched the 1998 version of The Phantom of the Opera

and I decided to write down my thoughts as I did so. God, it was such a horrible movie, and if you read through this you can tell how much I really think so. I progressively got more angry and done with it as I watched, hahaha. This is really long, very grammatically incorrect, unorganized and unedited, but venting to Notepad like this really helped me to get through that damn movie. So, if you’d like, you can check under the cut to read what I thought throughout the movie.

what the fuck

what is this rat doing

how the fuck did this rat have enough strength to pull the baby out of the water

why do the rats care

how do they care

WHAT THE FUCK

THAT CHILD GRABBED THE RAT

AH

no

stop

Why did this child bond with the rats. How. How did this happen. Can rats bond with people like that? I didn't think they could actually think that way

why is the wall leaking and why would he keep hitting it

same

mE

oooo he just got fucked lol

HOW DID HIS WHOLE UPPER HALF GET FUCKED UP LIKE THAT WHAT THE HELL

WHAT THE HELLIS THAT THE PHANTOM WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

OH MY GOD WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA WHY

is she gonna start singing just because she's alone

I was right

called it

ooo there he is is he gonna fall in love with her

he's weird

the face she made was funny

what is she doing

wait are those her nipples

I think I can see her nipples through her dress

what the fuck

ugh the movie's only nine minutes in

who the fuck is that

I'd turn right around like fuck that

what the hell

ok no he didn't say anything

he's creepy

is that Erik.

is his name even Erik in this or just the phantom? eehh I'm just gonna call him Erik it's easier

shouldn't he be... deformed? a bit??

no go away

this is very weird

why?

oooo because he isn't supposed to be there

how the fuck is she gonna "hear your thoughts" wtf

ok bitch is she talking to herself

is she crazy

oh my god

this person is gonna die becuase that rat got killed huh

this man is very unsanitary wtf

lol me

what is he doing

why did he just grab the mouse trap dumbass

eewwww why are the rats biting him and why is he just screaming like fucking do something about it

that was random

he's gonna become ratman now

eheh

lol I'm the girl hanging out with Christine

is she Meg?

Are they talking about Raoul? Did he send her those roses?

I'M CARLOTTA

it sounds like Carlotta is singing "Raoul" it's funny like same

what the fuck is Christine "hearing" Erik? The fuck

Is she talking to him thourgh her mind? The hell? She seems fucking crazy omg

Ok Christine is fucking crazy I think that the phantom is just a figment of her imagination and she's just psycho

that man is dirty

why is he specifically the rat exterminatior why cant he be a regular janitor

eww why are there so many rats and why the fuck does he keep the tails? nasty ass

these two men must think he's insane

EW HIS HAND IS FUCKED AAHHH GROSS IM TRYING TO EAT SNACKS FUCK OUTTA HERE WITH THAT

lol "shit" me hahaha

"strange things have been happening" naw everone is just fucking nuts

I don't wanna watch this movie anymore but I guess I gotta finish now

ugh Erik is so fucking creepy

did he just sniff her

HER FEMALE SMELL?? WHAT THE FUCK

he's sniffing her scarf and I'm fucking uncomfortable

his nose is big. and pointed.

I want him to leave

oh thank god he did

I'm the dude thats just swinging down from random ropes

was he watching them

they werent quite that subtle anyways

ooo he found a secret passage he gonna die

WHAT THE FUCK HE JUST GRABBED A LADY BY HER BOTTOM STOP IT

why is she ok with this how well do they know each other

ooo are they in box five

who is this guy who is just interviewing people and taking notes I wasnt paying attention when he came in

"shhh let's go now" lol me @ this movie

Alfred seems very annoying

his voice isn't fitting with his lips and face and look it's really weird

the lady's talking is weird in that same way too

hmmm they think there's treasure and they want it they're probably gonna die

TITS AH TITS JUST HAPPENED

that was... interesting

what the hell is going on now where are we what is this place why is there a party

umm that guy talking in the background to the little girls is super creepy

there's a lot of creepy people here

AH THAT GUYS FACE WHAT THE HELL HE'S SO CREEPY

WAIT FUCK IS HE RAOUL OH FUCK NO NO PLEASE

he seems awkward it's weird

lol she doesn't like roses rekt @ him

did that lady just storm out why is she so randomly butthurt

be the brother she never had? he just got friendzoned lol

uh oh they gon die

I really don't think there's any treasure guys

uh oh the rats heard them are they going to somehow tell Erik

ewww so many rats

wait are they telling him that they're there

how the fuck

how many rats do you think were used in this movie

HE JUST GOT SNATCHED UP WHAT THE FUCK

wait there really is a treasure

WHAATTT he just outted his girlfriend that asshole

HE JUST FUCKING CALLED HIMSELF A RAT WHAT THE FUCK

I'm calling him Ratman now

Alfred just died haaaaaa get rekt

I'm her scream oMG

she's just making a whole bunch of bad decisions rn

what's dripping

if there's a jumpscare I swear to god

I admire her trying to cover her tracks but she about to die

how the fuck did she even get stuck and how does he not hear her she's being loud

she's stupid

he's stupid

this movie is stupid

I'm angry lol

what the fuck is that face on the wall

I ACTUALLY HAD TO PAUSE THE FUCKING MOVIE WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS HE BITING HER TOUNGE IS HE TRYING TO RIP IT OUT OF HER MOUTH WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID THE ACTORS AGREE TO DO THIS AAAAHHHH NOOOOO WHAT THE FUUUUCCCCKKK AAAHHHH THAT'S SO GROOOSSS IM SHAKING FUUUCCKKKK

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO HER TOUNGE NO FUCK

you know that noise Tina Belcher makes that uncomfortable "uuhhhhh" noise welL YOU SHOULD FUCKING HERE MY RIGHT NOW MY LORD

FUCK THIS MOVIE

lol she just hit this dude with a chair, like, if only I could do that to this fucking move

did he say "you're wrong" or did he call him a rug

is this dude having a heart attack wtf

lol "he's dying" in the most calm way haha me

what the fuck is this motherfucker imagining right now my lord

fuck this guy is weird

*idubbbz voice* I wanna die

ewww I don't wanna see in this bitches throat ugh

why did this bitch scream ugh stfu

Christine makes funny faces when she sings and looks around weirdly it's funny

her face lol her eyes are like buldging

oo Ratmans here

she fuckin died

haha

why'd she pass out though

there are so many people standing around her like back tf up guys

I'm her like whimpering like me @ this movie

lol I'm the doctor

he has funny hair

god why does Christine make such funny/weird faces

fuck off Raoul you're fucking weird

how the fuck did Ratman get there

ugh he's so creepy he needs to fuck off as well

ugh this movie need to fuck off

why am I watching this

uh oh now Raoul's gonna die haha

idek if that's Raoul wait a sec I'm gonna look it up

ya it's him... I think. I'm just gonna keep going with that it is

dear god how am I only forty-four minutes in

he boutta die

ah nvm he didn't

lol he someone just called him Raoul I should've just waited

wait he has a brother

I'm so behind

WHAT THE FUCK THERE ARE NAKED PEOPLE EVERYWHERE WHAT THE FUCK WHY AHHHH PENIS AHHH BOOBS AHHHH WHY IS HAPPENING I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR THIS

I can't omg I really really want to stop watching this movie but I must continue... it's hard though

I don't get why these dudes are fighting

I'm so done with this movie

what is this bitch doing with her tounge

wait, Christine?

she's fucked up lol

god she's so creepy here

why is everyone in this movie so fucking creepy

wait it's not Christine

Rose Velvetlips? The fuck kinda name is that

what why'd he get so angry with her he was the one who was wrong. asshole.

he needs to calm the fuck down

lol he almost headbutted his brother

is this all because he was friendzoned?

what the fuck this creepy dude need to leave these little girls alone

oh my god what the fuck he's so fucking creepy

like for real is he a pedophile

god fuck this movie

I hope he dies

like comeon Ratman pull through and actually kill someone who deserves to be killed for once

this poor little girl

oh my god I'm so scared for her

I can hear the rats

omg this guy is so fucking creepy fucking stop it

yaass Ratman fuck him up

eww I mean thanks but like I didn't need to see that

comeone don't kill the girl please

just let her leave

no don't console her just let her leave dammit

oh thank god thank you Ratman

that'll probably be the only ok part of this movie, the pedophile dies and Ratman is nice to a child

ugh this asshole slapped her Ratman kill that fucker too

let's just turn this movie into him killing assholes who are mean to others who don't deserve it

ewwww I hope they're not really cutting rats tale that's gross and mean

dumb bitch don't touch the fire

ooo I don't like the way he said Christine the mics picked it up weird and it tingled in my ears ugh it gave me shivers like please no

how tf does she know where he is

I feel like he may kill her at some point, like, he thinks he loves her but she'll probably just die

what kind of dr. seuss kinda fucking machine is that

that's fucked up

why do they take so much pleasure from killing these rats so horribly

fucking psychos

lol they wrecked and got rekt

THIS FUCKERS HEAD JUST GOT CUT OFF OMG

karma's a bitch

soooo what was the point of that 'cause now we're just back to Christine

nearly an hour in... suprised I've made it this far...

wow it's so luxurious tf

she's gonna accidentally scare him

ah no he knew she was there

no I don't wanna hear her scream

lol this tune doesn't go with the scene

ewww that face he's making

she looks so fucking weird

I don't like this angle

WTF WHO IS THIS NAKED BITCH LYING ON A BED

OH NO IT'S CHRISTINE AND NOW RATMAN IS HERE ARE THEY FUCKING

WHAT THE FUCK THIS HAPPENED SO SUDDENLY

FUCK THIS FUCKING MOVIE

FUCK

AAAHHHH I MADE A BAD DECISION

FUCK

I WANNA GO HOME

NO

I could've done without that, fuck

what the fuck is the river of time and space

fuck you

fuck Christine

fuck the rats

ugh

I want to die

oh look its that creepy rat exterminator bitch

oh he's gone again

Raouls back

is he gonna go looking for her

ugh take a hint and leave

is that fly fake it's so weird

I never could get fly scenes

how do they film them

you can't train a fly, can you?

I wouldn't think so

oo this bitch found a secret passage

what the fuck is the exterminator doing

where is he going

why do I not believe that Christine is actually good at playing the organ

this is all so wrong

none of it is right

ugh

this is so weird

she wouldn't listen to him and he instantly got angry omg gtg bitch leave him

lol "I hate you and I hate this place" she sounds like a teenager

wait how old is she supposed to be

ooo she just stomped on some rats he's gonna get angry at her

does this bitch really have fake moles

Carlotta you fake bitch

hahaha

she just spit that water on the table

he just called her a fat cow that's mean but her reaction was funny

lol she thinks it's the other dude

hmmm I think Carlotta is actually the only character in this I like

she don't take shit from noone

this dude just walked out and now he's screaming for her

is he dying

he doesn't sound too urgent but I think that he's supposed to be

#badacting lol

but that could be said for most of the cast

how many times is she gonna say Mark

is that dude whos dying named Mark

who tf is Mark

eh it's probably him

uh oh Ratman's a-lurkin she aboutta die

ewwwww he bit her ear ugh stop that's gross

omg what the fuck is he doing to her boob

stop

AH FUCK YOU RATMAN THAT WAS UNECESSARY

if I were Carlotta I would get the fuck outta there

you would never see me in that fucking opera house again

lol her mole is on her nose now

aww her poor boob

that's gotta hurt

Ratman is gross

oh comeone just let Ratman have his way just leave Carlotta

like do you want to die

god how long until this movie is over

about twenty minutes left ugh

did they ever find mark

lol he's goin ham at that chandelier

they all boutta get fucked

why is his hair so long I just realized this

I was so caught up on his face not being deformed

but it's like weirdly floating majestically as he hacks at the chandelier

ugh fuck this

lol Carlotta's face as she watches the chandelier start to break is me

her scream is me

so many people just got fucked

rekt at them

poor them

wait Carlotta boutta die

LOL THAT GREENSCREEN HAAAA

oo she just got knocked over the head with that weird ass statue

how is she not dead

her hair looks funny lol

god Raoul leeeaavvveee

I hate this movie

I feel like Ratman is gonna end up killing her

Christine is gonna die if she keeps doing this

Ratman you need to stop

oh look it's the exterminator again

OH MY GOD RATMAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP

THIS IS RAPE

FUCK YOU RATMAN

oh my god I need to stop watching this movie

I was warned but it truly is so fucking terrible oh my god

thank god it's nearly over

Christine honestly try to leave like idk how but get the fuck outta there

oh wait if he catches her he may kill her

omg I don't know what to do aaahhhh

like I don't like this Christine but I feel bad for her and I want her to live

she's snoopin around, like, be careful Christine

ewww so many rats

he's just sitting there covered in rats, petting rats

lol she is disgusted, she is me

wait what the fuck

why is he taking his shirt off

OH MY GOD

I SAW THAT YOU GUYS WERE CALLING HIM RATFUCKER BUT I DIDN'T KNOW WHY

IS HE ACTUALLY GONNA FUCK THE RATS

WHAT THE FUCK

oh good he got up please say he didn't fuck the rats my lord aaaahhhh

I'm gonna need to see a fucking therapist after this

how did Raoul get there

this is stupid I thought she friendzoned him and got with Ratman but now that she knows that he fucks rats she's all calling Raoul her love in shit what the fuck Christine choose which fucked up guy you want and go, fuCK

oh the mirror

why is Ratman cuddling her shoes, weird fucker

what the fuck does that mean Raoul

what the fuck does that mean Christine

their convorsation is confusing

haha Ratmans there listening to their convo

ha he's crying

god that was a gross, horrible kiss

lol Ratman crying is me @ this movie, fuck

the way this one dude is talking is so bad, like his acting is so bad

why is she just so suddenly with Raoul

god back to this exterminator for a fucking second, now he's gone. WHERE THIS FUCK IS IT GOING WITH HIM JUST PLAY HIS FATE AND MOVE THE FUCK ON

so how is Ratman going to fuck this up

lol is that him clapping? haaa Ratman bitter af

ah theres the exterminator finally fuck

AHHH HE ABOUTTA CALL HER OUT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE FOR FUCKING RATMAN AHAAAA

HE DIIIIDDDD HAAAAAA

rekt at Christine haaaaa

what the fuck Ratman just flew out of nowhere

the dude with the notepad is just following everyone chasing Christine and Ratman and is taking notes I like him he's funny, he's me

DOWN ONCE MORE TO THE DUNGEON OF MY BLACK DESPAIR

he's so ugly

oh goddammit Ratman stop it

yaaasss Christine hit him with a rock, get it bitch

lol it took Raoul like twenty seconds to realize he was being called for

"forgive me" lol you ain't sorry Christine

what the fuck is she just going with it or is she actually going with him what the fuck Christine make up your fUCKING MIND

eight minutes left, thank gOd

oooo are they gonna have a sword fight 'cause I hope so

lol did noone know that these people had been dead and missing this whole time

lol Christine lowkey dying

oh wait Raoul grabbed a gun not a sword dammit I wanted them to duel

yaasss Raoul shot Ratman

what the fuck Christine she's upset over Ratman being shot fuck is she with Raoul or Ratman like I know it's hard for you to chose which fucked up man you want but just go with one

what now they're all leaving together

what the fuck

ugh

I'm so fucking confused

ooo this guy has a sword I hope he duels Ratman

lol Christine is so distraught over leaving Ratman, like, a) why and b) if you really wanted to get to him you should just fucking jump in the water and swim to him, or can you not swim? fuck

lol he got shot rekt at him

the rats are angry

he's retaliating

wait he just got shot again

how is he still up and running

and he just got stabbed

how is he still going

lol obviously she likes Ratman more Raoul should just dump her ass in the river and get outta there quicker

they've barely gotten anywhere, like I said, dump her ass

how is he still alive

they're calling for eachother

he wants her back

tell Raoul to turn around or dUMP HER ASS IN THE RIVER

like seriously, again, can she not swim?  did I miss something??

ahaaaaa Ratman just got stabbed

HE JUST FELL SO DRAMATICALLY INTO THE WATER HAAAAA

lol his ring fell off her finger what kinda stupid ass symbolism shit

I think the rats are crying

it ended on her crying

wait now there are shots of the theater. like I care.

I think someone was talking but I wasn't listening lol oh well

thank gOD this stupid fucking movie is over. I just wasted so much time that could've been put to use doing something better, like feeding birds, or doing charity work, or watching the 25th anniversary edition

I’ve yet to read the book (I just got it so I’m going to soon) but I really hope that it’s nothing like this

tbh I think Love Never Dies was better and Christine fucking dies in that one

k bye movie I’m gonna go do something productive thanks for the uncomfortable time

*ALSO I just wanted to quickly add that I saw that there was a mask pictured on the movies poster but I didn’t see one mask in this movie so like, yeah, fuck you movie

[bees-nest]

Honestly the worst thing about the new poto is the absence of the "keep your hand at the level of your eyes!" waitNO OH GOD OHTOHDD ok the best part we missed is the whole "She kissed me, right here, on the forehead - don't look daroga! - right here - don't look daroga!" ALSO IN THE BOOK CHRISTINE DOESNT DIE FOR NO REASON

[deadguydeathmatch]

Dead Guy Death Match Round 1: Poll 52