#tog mutuals I am SO sorry

[velidewrites]

It’s virtually impossible to be in the ACOTAR fandom for 2+ years and not see any TOG spoilers, so here’s what I know before going into my first read:

Warning: spoilers ahead (if you haven’t seen any already LOL)

Chaol is pronounced Kale even though only two of those letters are in his actual name

Celaena is pronounced Selena (still have doubts on this one)

Dorian is the reason I’m trying to read these books again because I saw a tiktok thirst trap and I am only a girl

The witch Manon is with Dorian, but should have been with someone called Elide (also a witch? Sources unclear)

The witch Elide is with Lorcan, who has the same last name as the Vampire Diaries guy and is built like a brick shithouse

There are dragons or dragon-shaped creatures

Celaena is Aelin (unclear who Aelin is other than the queen of something)

Rowan is her personal trainer but unlike Cassian, he has white hair. He is also her cousin

Speaking of Rowan’s hair, it used to be long but it isn’t anymore (Sarah if you do this to Lucien I will literally throw up right in front of you)

The books end with Rowan turning into a bird

[compacflt]

Watched Marriage Story today, for the very first time, and had a lotta thoughts about EDTS Ice and Mav, especially their divorce-era. Wondered whether they would’ve genuinely gotten a divorce, if they’d somehow been married at that point. Charlie kinda reminded me of Ice: the benign belief in his own intellectual superiority, the self-pity, the willful blindness towards the reality of his relationship, the selfishness—not in the sense that Ice wasn’t kind or warm or loving, but in the sense that he really needed things to go his way (for them to not talk about anything). Of course Mav was no Nicole, he definitely shared his half of the blame, but I could totally imagine the two of ‘em having a huge fight that devolved into: “I can’t believe I have to know you … forever!” ‘Cause they kinda did: being in the Navy, moving around in the same circles, sharing an estranged kid they were both hoping to make-up with…

ok so part one of this ask not having seen marriage story: yeah i am 100% sure if they’d codified their relationship in words they would’ve broken up. like forever. letting all that anger simmer instead of boiling over is sometimes a blessing in disguise—if you say you’re together, you’re together. if you say you’re over, you’re over. no take-backsies on something like that. whereas if you don’t talk about any of it, the boundaries are a lot less definite. a blessing in disguise. i did (for mental torture purposes, and also for a prompt fill i [sorry to whomever sent it in] didnt hate myself enough to write) brainstorm that Bad Ending—if, say, Mav HAD been reckless and decisive and told ice “get the fuck out of my house obviously this isn’t gonna work you betrayed my trust & bailed on me at the second lowest moment of my life & conspired with a dying woman who is in love with you to ruin our son’s life in the exact same way MY life was once ruined and you blame me for turning you gay but you were already gay to begin with and You Fucking Killed My Best Friend And We Never Talk About It so fuck you we’re done” and went no-contact and threw ices shit out into the street and never went back to the hangar and changed all the locks and his phone number etc. and… say ice is like decimated for a few years straight, like numbingly and crushingly depressed, & then he meets not-his-sister-sarah and tells her the truth (that now he can realize with the benefit of hindsight & grief & loss—funny how loss always makes everything real clear all of a sudden): that he was in a long term relationship with a man with whom he was raising a child & with whom he was probably in love, and she marries him anyway, and obviously she’s not maverick and she doesn’t make him as happy as he did and she knows that but at least she stops him from being actively su*cidal and at least they can be open about their relationship in public and maybe they have a kid or two, and maybe he completely shifts his strategy and relocates to Virginia and moves his AOR to the atlantic instead of the pacific so he can get as far away from San Diego and maverick and home as possible, and maybe it works, and maybe there are some days he doesn’t even think about maverick or Bradley or goose, and when people mention the 1990s he grimaces and tries to forget, and he’s not ashamed of it so much as he is hurt by the memory of his own carelessness, and maybe he cries often and very very quietly, and maybe he gets his life back on track and before he knows it he has four stars on the opposite coast from the one he’d originally planned, and of course he’s not happy, but he’s never happy, so whatever.

Until. some event he can’t get out of. A mutual friend’s change of command ceremony or retirement ceremony or funeral. first thing he sees (like always) is captain Mitchell shining in his dress blues (like always). they avoid each other all evening, why bother trying? until someone forces them together, “weren’t you two at TOPGUN together? didn’t you guys kill all those soviets together?” and on and on, yes, we were, this is very very uncomfortable, until eventually they’re alone, and maverick asks, “can i buy you a drink sir?” but he’s staring at ice’s left hand and staring and staring, and it’s been over a decade but still ice doesn’t know how to say no to him, so they leave this joint and get a drink somewhere else, and maverick says, “how long have you been married,” and ice says, “eight years next march,” and you can see maverick doing the math in his head 2016-8=2008 okay, “what’s her name,” “sarah,” maverick laughs but feels bad for laughing, ice says, “we have a couple kids,” maverick stops laughing. “shit,” maverick says. ice says, “it was very difficult for me for a very long time;” maverick says, “what did you tell her;” ice says, “the truth;” maverick waits a second to respond and then says, “and what was the truth?” ice tells him the truth which is “well that i was in a long-term relationship with another man and we were raising a kid together and most likely we were in love with each other but it didn’t work out.” maverick takes a long time to respond to that and is blinking a lot and if you put your ear to his chest you’d hear that he is struggling to breathe. he says “and she married you anyway.” “she did.” he says “and You married Her anyway.” “i did.” Ice pauses then says “it was very difficult for me for a very long time.” he pauses some more and drinks and watches disinterestedly as maverick blinks and blinks. then ice says “so uh are you…?” maverick says “ive had a couple… a couple flings… nothing. nothing like.” and ice understands. maverick says, “why didn’t you tell me?” “tell you what?” “that you. that you and i were. that you felt that way about me.” ice says, “i did. i tried. i left you voicemails & sent you postcards & tried for half a decade to get in touch with the kid. did you not get my—did you not get my voicemails or my letters?” maverick blinks and blinks and says “i did get them but i didn’t open them;” ice says “well that’s that then.” and drinks. maverick says “how long after me did you meet her;” ice says “a couple years, i was deployed for O.I.F.” maverick says, “yeah, me too.” and he almost starts crying. he says “ice I’m sorry but you’re telling me ive completely wasted the last decade of my life and i don’t know what to do. do you love her? does she make you happy?” ice says “yes” and “yes.” maverick says “does she make you as happy as you were with me?” ice doesn’t care enough anymore to be dishonest and says “no. Of course not. but she made life easier when it was very difficult for me for a very long time.” maverick says, “run away with me. fuck it. let’s try again. let’s start over. no one else understands. come on. you and me. we always come back to each other. let’s try again.” and it is very very tempting. One of those watershed moments when life goes crystal clear and you can see through it. but only for a moment. ice is so tired and too old for that kind of adventure anymore. he says, i have kids, and i have a wife, and i have the navy and my four stars to think of, and i— he can be honest about this: “i want to. you know i do.” he pauses. doesn’t think he wants maverick to touch him. that can’t possibly end well and historically has not ended well. flinches away when maverick reaches out. he says “but i can’t.” maverick says, “i miss you more than anything. i want—even still!—i—please…I can’t…” another pause. ice says, “Let me get the bill, Mav.” so ice pays mavericks tab and they go their separate ways.

and maverick goes out to the desert to fly the sr-72 darkstar and pushes it beyond its limits on purpose and he doesn’t intend to survive but it’s his stupid too-good instincts that have him popping the cockpit escape pod ejection handle, and he lives by accident, like always, and destroys several billion taxpayer dollars in an instant, and without admiral Kazansky on his six backing him up admiral Cain has everything he needs to dishonorably discharge captain mitchell from the navy, so after 33 years of service to his country and 3 air to air kills maverick is unceremoniously dishonorably discharged and they kick him out without a second thought, and the Dagger special mission command goes to someone else and Bradley gets team leader and probably fails and probably dies, and atlantic fleet commander Tom Kazansky is offered the promotion to chief of naval operations and takes it, and doesn���t live long enough to meet his grandchildren, and that’s about all i have to say about that.

Now im going to go watch marriage story to answer this ask educatedly so hold on.

ok coming back the next day post marriage story and yeah you’re right i think it would look like that

[saintnesryn]

kind of interesting how whenever fans in marginalized groups speak up about racism/homophobia/transphobia/ableism/etc. in a series, it’s labeled as ‘anti,’ and then is just brushed aside. funny how certain fans get more angry about marginalized groups speaking up about how they’ve been hurt by a series, than by the actual issues they’re upset about.

[bookofmirth]

Hi I am another Elriel shipper that genuinely loves reading you thoughts. While I don’t agree with everything you say I think they are very insightful and thought provoking and I enjoy them . Before I get to my point I just want to say that I am truly sorry on behalf of the Elriel fandom for all the negative that has been going down as of late. As someone who yearns for peace in the fandom and cannot tolerate seeing honest people being torn because of a ship.. seeing this shipwar pains me . I am fairly new to this fandom and I follow many Elriel blogs and pro Elaine and pro Lucien blogs. Some happen to be Elucien shippers too and I find myself gravitating towards them more as people rather than of my fellow Elriel shippers. Don’t get me wrong I still adore Elriel . But I just don’t want to surround myself with certain type of people no longer . My question is , Do you know of any blogs that lean more towards neutral shipping or don’t care about shipping at all?

Hello lovely person!

I'm glad you don't agree with everything I say - I'd assume you weren't really paying attention if you just nodded along like you had a blank smile on your face. I'm sorry the fandom isn't a great experience for you right now. I hope that it changes soon 🤞 In the meantime, ship whatever your heart desires!

These blogs do share similar ships with me, but I know that they either don't participate in the ship war and/or they just vibe. If anyone else wants to recommend their blog as well, feel free! I am not good at going through my dash and I talk so much with people in comments or on discord that I can't remember who is actually active on tumblr.

@cassianandfenrysaremyboyos Lisa and I have been mutuals forever and while we share ships, she's good at just ignoring the BS and doing her own thing

@aelin-godkiller Lou is also a long-time mutual and while she doesn't post quite as much anymore, when she does it's 🔥 she's so smart

@eyllweambassador Ezra is more into ToG, but is a devoted multi/rarepair shipper

@feysandfeels the Lady Lulu to my Lady Lele. She doesn't put up with any anti sjm BS and is a positive space.

@moononastring Yes Gigi is very much an elucien, but she tends to stay away from the drama

@writtenonreceipts lots of fanfic, no drama

@separatist-apologist MB just vibes with whatever she likes in the moment and I appreciate that about her

@gimme-mor is a multishipper - despite being critical of certain portions of the fandom in the past. Can you ask for more?

@ruhncervos Tati just vibes with what she likes

@elains makes lots of lovely aesthetic things

@sjmkinkmeme yes this is my side project with a couple other people, but we only post creative works - no ship war stuff allowed

@tangledraysofsunshine idek if Alex posts that much lol but she is probably the sweetest person you will ever meet in this fandom, and I've known her for a few years. I know. Trust me. The sweetest.

@rayonfrozenwings Renée is the original theory queen

@feyre-cursebreaker Carley always has interesting thoughts

@yazthebookish obviously Yaz has Gwynriel feelings but she has been doing a lot of great theory lately and making posts sorting out all the lore. And if y'all had any idea how much restraint she has shown with this ship war...

and some others for funsies: @darling-archeron @shyvioletcat @starseternalnighttriumphant

I know there are other people who are amazing humans and funny and smart and don't have time for this nonsense, but they may not post much so I might have forgotten to include them.

[heyovivi]

Elucien Theory: Hercules Retold

So I have a theory and it was inspired by a user here on Tumblr—I am so sorry I did not get their user but if you know them please send me their @ because it's all because of them that I was able to come up with this theory! And if anyone else has thoughts about this then please share your thoughts in the comments—and no hate please this is just me speculating and looking to the future!

Anyways, continuing on…

A few days ago, I came across this Elucien post on Tumblr and it was small, simple. It was just saying that the song, “I won’t say I’m in love”, sang by Meg in the Disney adaptation of Hercules, is like Elain’s song when she’s falling in love with Lucien but she won’t let herself admit it.

Now, this small post sparked an interesting theory for me. Almost everyone of my Elucien mutuals have speculated that Elain’s story is highly reminiscent of Rapunzel—and before I couldn’t really see it. To be honest, I myself am not a huge Elucien shipper—but whatever makes Lucien happy makes me happy (I just want his story to conclude on a good note).

Moving on, SJM has already told the story of Rapunzel but she didn’t do it ACOTAR she did it in TOG with Elide. This made me have my doubts about Elain and Lucien being endgame because why would SJM recycle a story she’s already told? Of course, as an author she’s entitled to do whatever she wants but I, myself, highly doubted that she would recycle stories.

Because of this, I was strongly convinced that Elain was going to go evil (due to some questionable wording around Elain’s actions in ACOSF), and that Lucien was going to find a happy ending with just rediscovering his family (I.E. discovering who his real father is).

However, after stumbling across the post, I am a firm believer that if Elucien were to become endgame than their story wouldn’t be reminiscent of Rapunzel, but instead it would be a retelling of Hercules.

Now, if you grew up with the classical late 90’s-to early 2000’s Disney animation then chances are you’ve watched Hercules—but if you’re like me you’ve watch Hercules about a couple dozen times. And so you know the story inside and out—the Disney version NOT the actual Greek myth. We don’t want the actual Greek myth because that would entail that Elain dies a horrible death and we all know SJM likes her happy endings.

But anyways (getting side tracked), there are so many theories that can plug into this one. It can connect the evil Elain theories, Koschei theories, and maybe even some Lucien theories.

Let’s start first with the big theory.

Elain.

Now if I’m being honest I don’t like Elain. I really don’t. I don’t connect with her. Don’t understand her. And really that’s probably because I haven’t had the chance to read from her point of view. But after ACOSF her likeness has just decreased exponentially. Though because of this theory I have found some new found hope in her character.

In ACOSF I felt like it was heavily hinted at that Elain was working behind the scenes. She was doing things that Cassian thought questionable, she was roaming around, acting sort of out sorts, and honestly she wasn’t the Elain we had grown accustomed to in the books prior to ACOSF.

“Elain has already departed with Feyre, claiming she had to be up with the dawn to tend to an elderly faerie’s garden. Cassian didn’t exactly know why he suspected this wasn’t trie. There had been some tightness in ELain’s face as she’d said it.”

Not to mention it felt like she was trying hard to insert herself in situations where we, as readers, weren’t sure if she was fully capable of because a) she hadn’t had the proper training, and b) she never ought to put herself in situations that were dangerous or were outside of her own comfort zone (like you can go looking for dead troves but you can’t go out hunting to feed your family with Feyre (sorry—again she’s just not my favorite character)).

So all of this led me to believe that she was working behind the scenes—like Meg did in Hercules.

As the story goes, the animated one at least, Meg sold her soul to Hades and in exchange he resurrected her lover who—soon after, left her for another leaving Meg to forever be the puppet of Hades and pawn in his plan. I feel a similar situation is going to go down with Elain and Koschei.

What I theorize is that Elain, after the events of ACOFAS and before the events of ACOSF, somehow communicated with Koschei (because remember, love makes people desperate) and in exchange for making her human or finding a way to make her human, she would act as his eyes and ears. And remember, this isn’t so far-fetched. Koschei can literally whisper on wind and control people despite being bound to the lake.

So like Meg, Elain made a deal with the devil in the name of love.

Now, let’s move onto Koschei.

Koschei, in this case, would be Hades. He makes deals, bargains, yadada and if I’m right he is using Elain as a pawn to get an inside scoop on the Inner Circle and possibly to get closer to Azriel?

For some reason Koschei has some interest in Azriel—and large part of that could be because the fourth dead trove is connected to Azriel and in order to get close to him Koschei is using Elain’s feminine wiles to seduce him and what not. Now—anyone can probably argue that that’s probably why this could very well be an E/riel theory—but it’s not. Because I firmly believe that Elain’s book isn’t next. I believe Azriel’s book is next and by the end of his book, Koschei’s interest in him will dwindle as he sets his eyes on Lucien.

Why Lucien? What could Lucien possibly have to do with Koschei?

Well who happens to be the one placing powerful wards on the dead troves?

Helion (and Rhys?).

And who could possibly rival him in such magic?

His son. Lucien.

We’ve seen the power that Lucien holds—we’ve seen that in moments of stress (such as Elain getting tossed into the cauldron) that Lucien is capable of replicating his father’s magic, unconsciously. So in order to get a hold of the dead troves Koschei could use Elain to get close to Lucien in hopes that he could—idk break through Helion’s wards?

But like the movie things don’t always go as plan…

I’m going to get back to Koschei but let’s move onto Lucien.

Now, in the story Hercules had his trusty companions and so does Lucien. Lucien has the exiles and something tell me that his main focus is going to be freeing Vassa from her curse with the “help” of Elain (who is undercover for Koschei).

I think that Koschei has a few tricks up his sleeves, a big one that he literally lives on an Island of monsters that do his bidding. So like the lion, the hydra—they could be possible obstacles in Lucien’s path shun him away to finding a way in breaking Vassa’s curse.

But like the Disney adaptation, Elain, like Meg, starts to fall in love with Lucien because he’s not guy she thought he was and he’s so much more than a guy with a fire dick. But she has to keep on spying for Koschei because he doesn’t want Lucien and the exiles to break Vassa’s curse.

But when Elain says no more, I’m done, Koschei reveals her as a spy and uses their bargain to try to harm Lucien which might lead to Elain being selfless and shattering the bond to free Lucien from being bound to her, or Lucien shattering the bond because he felt betrayed because the woman he loves had been deceiving him all along.

And then what happens next…well I don’t really know what happens next. I mean, Elain could always die and be resurrected like Meg was but honestly I really have no idea??? Like it would be cute that if Elain was resurrected she was resurrected as human and then Lucien decides to bound his life to her like Lorcan did with Elide or something—but again, recycling plot lines. But from there it could literally go anywhere.

What I do think might happen is that Elain and Lucien will probably travel the world together? Lest not forget that despite being coddled most of her life, Elain also wanted to travel to the continent with her father during his business dealings but never had the chance. So safe to say that (fingers crossed) Helion won’t be dead and Lucien can finally catch a break!

Tell me your thoughts in the comments!

[with-my-murder-flute]

Hi everybody, thanks for the asks letting me know I made the top of @yusuftiddies’ list of Homophobes in TOG Fandom, you can stop sending them now.

So.

I can make mistakes and fuck up and own that. I am serious about listening to marginalized people. But... in this case, while @yusufstiddies generally describes factual events that happened and factual posts that exist, I have to say that I can’t actually apologize for the things I’m called out for because I don’t think they’re homophobic. The things he criticizes me for are things that come from a lot of personal experience as a queer bisexual cis woman, as well as a lot of reflection, research, and study. I believe in them really strongly and stand by them.

I’m really sorry if this makes TOG fandom too hostile, because it is not my intention to make this place so unpleasant that anyone feels driven out. I understand if my stance means people no longer want to follow me/read my stuff/participate in projects I’m involved with (though I’d rather hand off the Research Hub to someone else than see it go down with me). I’m posting this so people can know where they stand before they decide whether to keep interacting with my blog, or “deplatform” me as @yusufstiddies recommends.

I would recommend, for anyone who doesn’t want to see my posts, using Tumblr’s new post content filtering feature. If you type a username (like star-anise or with-my-murder-flute) into it, Tumblr will hide all posts featuring that specific string of characters, and therefore any post or reblog of mine.

To address the accusations against me:

I am an anti-anti: Yes. I’ve reblogged posts of mine about this before. I care passionately about preventing child abuse, but I think there are better ways to prevent child abuse in fandom (like concrete harassment policies so predatory behaviour can be reported and stopped early, and education about digital consent and healthy relationships) than attacking people who write “bad ships,” not least because the first people it hurts are abuse survivors trying to work through their trauma, and because the research says you cannot actually tell who’s a sexual predator based on what they write about.  Fiction affects reality, but not on a 1:1 basis. My mainblog, @star-anise, has a really extensive archive of my writing on the subject.

I said cishet men aren’t more privileged than gay men: Kinda. What I actually did was question whether Every Single Cishet Man benefits from more privilege than Every Single Gay Man. If a man is cishet but gets beaten up because people perceive him as gay, he’s not exactly feeling the warm toasty glow of heterosexual privilege in that moment. Oppression is complicated and there are times when someone’s lack of privilege on one axis is way less important than someone else’s lack of privilege on another axis.

The post above also includes me reblogging someone else’s addition about how straight men can be included in the queer movement: I’m queer. @yusufstiddies has made it very clear that he isn’t comfortable with the word “queer” and doesn’t like it. Therefore I think it’s understandable that he might not understand that the queer community sees ourselves as a coalition of people dedicated to dismantling the structures of sex and gender that oppress us, not a demographic of people whose gender identities or sexual orientations can be neatly mapped. However, I would say that doesn’t make queer theory inherently homophobic.

There are also some related points @yusufstiddies didn’t level at me specifically, but I would like to address:

The constant focus on the unsafeness of cishet people:

I’m not cishet. I’m a bisexual woman who’s dated women. Sixth-light is a queer woman married to a woman. This is not an issue of non-LGBTQ+ people blundering their way into something they don’t experience the daily consequences of. This is an issue of people from WITHIN the LGBTQ+ community who sincerely disagree with @yusufstiddies about the pressures we experience and how best to deal with them. I think that even if @yusufstiddies were to filter his fiction input to only LGBT-written work about LGBT experiences, or even only trans-written work about trans people, he would still find a lot of things he finds upsetting or transphobic, because sexual and gender identities are really diverse and not everything will suit one person.

The contention that saying “’Queer is a slur’ is TERF propaganda” is transmisogyny because it dilutes the definition of “TERF”:

People who point out the phrase is TERF propaganda are not calling every person who says it a TERF, and we are not trying to argue that telling a queer person that queer is a slur is inherently equal to the kind of damage a TERF does when she attacks a trans woman out of transphobia. Queer people being able to use the word “queer” does not have the same importance as trans women being able to live, work, and survive in public. Rather, we are literally saying, “This is a thing TERFs say when they take a break from attacking trans women and try to recruit new members to their group, so it’s in our best interests to not give it too wide a currency.”

Some people have experienced the word “queer” used as a hateful word hurled against them and don’t want to hear it ever again. I get that. It happens. Where I grew up, “gay” was a synonym for “shitty” and it took me a lot of years out of high school before the word “gay” wouldn’t shoot my blood pressure through the roof.  I actually do understand that and think that’s valid (and again, support using post content filtering for that word).

One of the things I do at @star-anise is argue with young people who are headed into full-on transmisogynistic TERF territory, and work at reeling them back and deradicalizing them. I use a tag called “weedwhacking” so my followers can filter out the sometimes lengthy back-and-forths we get going.

Something I’ve learned, interacting with so many TERFs and proto-TERFs, is that one way they frequently get recruited into harassing trans people was through discourse around the word “queer”. For one, it encouraged them to want to distance themselves from any perception of LGBT people as “weird” or “not normal”, which led to seeing trans people as “weird” and “not normal” and therefore not good members of the “gay pride” community. For two, repeating “queer is a slur” predictably causes a lot of queer people to react in a defensive manner, so by teaching young or new people to say it, TERFs can set them up to feel alienated from the larger LGBTQ+ community and more open to TERF propaganda.

The next issue isn’t mentioned in the original callout post, but I think it’s key to this entire issue:

@yusufstiddies has made several posts about what cishet people should and shouldn’t write. For example, cishets shouldn’t write Nicky experiencing internalized homophobia.  Another is a detailed post of things cishets shouldn’t write about trans people, including which sexual positions only trans people are allowed to write. I would imagine that part of his frustration with fandom has been the lack of traction those posts have gotten. I know I very deliberately didn’t reblog them.

That isn’t because I don’t agree that the things he complains about are rarely handled well by cishet authors. I agree that there’s a lot of bad fic out there that contributes to negative stereotypes against LGBTQ+ people and is basically a microaggression to read.

I have two very deeply-seated reasons for my position:

LGBTQ+ identities are different from many other political identities because most people are not born identifiably LGBTQ+. It’s something we have to figure out about ourselves. And one really important way that we do that is using the safety of fiction to explore what an experience would be like, sometimes years before we ever admit that we fit the identity we’ve written about. So banning cishet authors from writing something is really likely to harm closeted and questioning LGBTQ+ people. It will lengthen the amount of time questioning people take before finding the identity that really fits them, and force closeted people to be even more closeted. 

There’s a lot of undeniably shitty stuff in fandom. However, I fundamentally believe that trying to target the people creating it and forcing them to stop doesn’t work very well, and has the serious byproduct of killing the creativity and enthusiasm of the rest of fandom and resulting in less of the actual thing you like being produced. I think that it is infinitely more productive to focus on improving the ratio of good stuff in fandom than trying to snuff out every bad thing.

Like I said: I understand if this means former followers, mutuals, or friends no longer want to interact with me. I’ll be saddened, but I’ve obviously chosen this path and can deal with the consequences. 

I wish this could have worked out differently.

[kaydeefalls]

For the writer ask meme: 3, 11, 12 for The Pride

Aw, nice, thank you! The Pride Pact, cheesy meet-cute AU of my heart.

3. Any deleted scenes that didn't make it into the fic?

Nope! I wrote this one in chronological order and 100% by the seat of my pants, just grooving with where it decided to take me. Never had anything extraneous to delete. (That's pretty normal for me, though -- it's rare that I write entire scenes and then delete them later. It definitely happens, but not often.)

11. What happens to these characters 2, 5, 10 years later?

You know, normal stuff. IDK, these are the most real-world-normal versions of the TOG characters I've ever written. Nicky and Joe definitely move in together way too quickly, probably within a couple of months. Joe switches career paths a couple of times, trying to figure out a way to make a living in the arts a little more directly. Nile bullies them into holding their wedding reception at the Guard and is genuinely surprised and thrilled when they actually follow through. She and Celeste probably shack up at some point. Lykon finishes his degree and becomes a social worker, but keeps pulling bar shifts anyway because he enjoys it and likes the excuse to hang out with Andy and Quynh. Everything is soft and occasionally stressful because that's what real life is but they all stay friends and stuff. Just nice happy things, IDK.

12. Pick a scene and give writer's commentary on your thoughts.

OH GOD HOW DO I EVEN

fine

Once in the cab, he ignores Joe as best he can, resting his head against the window. The glass feels cool against his face. Finally, Joe breaks the silence. "I'm sorry," he says. "I don't know what I said that pissed you off so much, but whatever it was, I am sorry."

"Okay," Nicky tells the window, still not looking at him.

"Nicky." When he doesn't respond, Joe reaches out to rub Nicky's shoulder. "C'mon, please. I don't think you've ever been mad at me before, and I really want to make it right. This sucks."

Nicky considers shrugging him off, but realizes he's already leaning into Joe's touch in spite of himself. "It's nothing, it's stupid. I'll probably forget about it in the morning anyway."

"I won't, though. Please, Nicky, just talk to me—"

"I just wish you would stop bringing up the damn Pride pact," Nicky says, all in a rush, knowing exactly how ridiculous he must sound. "Like—it's fine, whatever, I know you and I are never going to…" He swallows and shakes his head. "I've made my peace with it. But you don't need to keep reminding all our friends exactly how unfuckable you think I am."

Joe freezes, his grip on Nicky's shoulder tightening. "That's not—"

"I know that is not how you intend it," Nicky says quietly. "It's just a joke at this point, but that's how it feels, so. I wish you wouldn't."

So, like, it's no secret that the Pride pact is based on an actual agreement I made (at Pride) with the woman who is now my wife, because we were the only two queer women in a social group dominated by gay men. (Very little else about the fic is based on RL, but the basic premise, yes.) Anyway. The way SHE tells it, she'd tried to chat me up a few times at that point, but I was clearly not interested, so she proposed the pact as a way to prove that we could just be friends and I wouldn't have to worry about her Making It Weird. From my perspective, I legit had no idea she was interested and felt very Warned Off by the way she shot me down out of absolutely nowhere when we weren't even flirting or anything. But whatever, it's all good.

Fast forward a couple of years. We're still just friends. She still brings up the pact as a joke among our friends on the regular, and at one point I get drunk with a mutual friend and rant about it to him for like an hour because, like, I haven't had a date in ages and there are still only a bare handful of other female-identified folks in our friend group and I would really appreciate it if my ONE friend who is also inclined towards women would stop reminding all of our mutual friends exactly how unfuckable she finds me. (Unbeknownst to me, the reason she keeps mentioning it is because she is solidly crushing on me at this point and is overcompensating because she still doesn't want to make it weird.)

That conversation between Nicky and Joe? We never actually had it. Because it honestly wound up not being relevant by the time we got together in real life, and it was just that one random night I got really ticked off about it -- it's not something I was genuinely upset by, it had just been a weird night and I'd been in a shitty mood. But that's my imagining of how much more quickly we might have gotten our shit together if we'd ever actually TALKED ABOUT IT like freaking grownups. Living vicariously through fictional characters, folks!

(Other fun fact: my wife reads almost all my fic before I post it these days. When she got to that scene, she was like OH MY GOD IS THAT WHAT YOU THOUGHT THE WHOLE TIME and it was legitimately hilarious.)

[lxndonorris]

special present - Ben Chilwell

Y/N x Ben Chilwell

Theme: Smut (you’ve been warned)

a bit drunk, you confess your feelings to chilly, leading to you sleeping together x

word count: 1510+

Ben and you have been friends for several years since you met at a Leicester City meet and greet. You exchanged numbers after the event ended, and even went on a date with each other. However, you both decided to just stay friends, since you didn’t want to risk losing the other. Over the years, you’ve gotten really close to him, and after a while, you became a really good team, doing nearly everything together.

Ben makes everything seem so easy and comfortable, so you even shared a bed multiple times after a night out clubbing. Mutual friends asked you if something was going on, but you always denied it, since you weren’t even sure if he wants anything besides the very close friendship.

Today, you were celebrating your birthday with a few of your closest friends, and of course, Ben was the first one to come to the party. The day went pretty well for you, just enjoying your friend’s company, dancing and drinking with everyone. As the night progresses, more and more people leave, until it’s way past midnight and Ben is the only one left, sitting right next to you on the sofa.

Sighing, you lean against his shoulder, while he strokes your back. “I’m so tired.” You say, giggling. Ben chuckles, kissing your forehead. “Same.” He says softly, looking at his watch. “Well, I think I should go now.” You look up to him, smiling softly. “It’s pretty late, huh?” Already sleepy, you try your best to keep your eyes open.

“Yeah, at least there is no training tomorrow.” He says, stands up, and nearly stumbles over your table. The two of you share a laugh, as you help him standing straight. “Maybe you should stay for the night, you’re pretty drunk.” You stroke his arm tenderly, while he turns his face to you. “Is that okay with you?” Nodding slowly, you intertwine your fingers with his. “Of course.” 

Ben sighs deeply, hesitating to take your offer. “Alright, but I’ll take the couch.” He says defeated and sits back down, nearly pulling you down with him. Now you’re lying on his lap, giggling. “Then it’s settled.” You say and struggle to get off of him. “I have no choice now.” He says, helping you to stand up. Brushing your hair out of your face, you feel yourself blushing, once you notice him staring at your eyes.

Ben blinks slowly, but shakes his head, trying to snap out of it, “I’m sorry.” He says softly but you just shrug. “For what? Everything’s good.” For a while, you stand in front of each other, feeling the tension rise slightly, before you feel the need to cut it off. “Uh, I’m gonna leave you, to get ready for bed.” You say, pointing at your bedroom door. Ben smiles softly and nods. “Sounds good.” He growls deeply, his voice huskier than before.

While he prepares the sofa, you walk into your room, closing the door behind you, instantly leaning against it. “What am I doing?” You mutter to yourself, thinking about what just happened. Trying to just roll with it, you change into something more comfortable, choosing one of your favorite shirts and shorts. As you lay down on your bed, you think about Ben just being in the other room, and there is no denying that there is something between you.

Taking a deep breath you get up from the bed and open the door, seeing him shirtless, with his back turned towards you, just finishing preparing his bed for the night. “Ben?” You say softly, and he turns around quickly. “Ya?” He says worryingly, his face more tensed than usual. “Would you, stay with me?” You say, blushing again heavily. “Is everything okay?” He says, taking a step closer to you.

Trying not to stare at his bare chest for too long, you try to concentrate on his eyes instead. “Yeah, I just, need you. I think.” You say, scratching your arm.  “Okay,” Ben says comfortingly, reaching for your hand. You embrace him, following his lead back into your bedroom. Together, you get into the bed, lying down, face to face. “Hope it’s better now.” He says, still holding your hands beneath the sheets.

You move even closer to him, feeling the heat of his body spending you comfort instantly. “It is. Thank you.” Your voice barely hearable, you can feel your own heart beat faster, while you still look deeply into his eyes. Not hesitating anymore, you lean in and kiss him once before you pull away again quickly. “I’m sorry.” You say quietly, blushing again. Now he brushes your hair our of your face, tucking it behind your ear.

“It’s okay.” He breathes deeply, “I think I need to tell you something.” A sudden rush of adrenaline runs through every single bone of yours, your heart beating extremely fast. “Anything.” You say, your voice shaking. “I think I love you,” Ben says, his voice breaking slightly, his eyes tearing up. Speechless, your gaze shifts between his eyes, his lips, and his fingers on your cheek. “I just needed to get it out of me.” He says softly. “It’s okay if you don’t feel the sa-”

But before he can finish that sentence you kiss him once more, this time in a more longing and passionate kiss. As you separate, you can still feel the taste of him, mixed with beer tingling on your tongue. “You don’t know how happy I am right now.” You say, your hands slowly stroking across his chest. “Can you feel my heart racing?” He breathes deeply, and you can actually feel his pulse racing. 

“Yeah.” You say, your hands wander even further down until they reach his waist. Ben smirks slightly, his eyebrows raised, running his fingers along your cheek, your jawline to your chin. “What are you doing?” He says playfully, moving even closer. “I’ve been waiting for this for so long.” You smirk, your hands now stroking his belly, drawing circles on his skin. “I hoped you’d say that.”

Suddenly, he rolls on top of you, trying not to put too much pressure on your body. Now his face is hovering over yours, leaning down to kiss you once, twice, leaving you wanting more and more. “Is this okay with you?” He asks you politely while catching his breath. “Yes, I want you, now.” You say, licking your lips. “I need you too.” He says and kisses you passionately, grinding his body against yours.

You can feel his dick bulging inside his shorts, rubbing against your thighs. He rocks his hips rhythmically, slowly but steadily. The tension inside your room rises more and more, making you moan softly, After a while of just making out, you start tugging at his shorts, desperately trying to remove them. “Be patient.” He breathes into your mouth, putting a hand your yours.

Now he sits on your lap, looking at you mischievously. “Let me handle that.” Easily, he removes his shorts, revealing his dick tenting in his underwear. He grabs his bulge, stroking himself through his boxers. “Take me.” You hiss, bending your hips into him, so he can remove your shorts as well. Licking his lips at the sight of your panties, he starts kissing your thighs gently. “This feels so good.” You say, leaning your head back into the pillows.

Before you can react, however, he removes your panties, his fingers brushing over your slit. “Fuck.” He growls. “You are so wet.” Chuckling, you look into his eyes again. “Every time I see you.” You say breathlessly, seeing him pulling his underwear down too. Gasping, you can feel his cock rubbing against your thighs, before he slides into you, filling you completely.

“Benjamin.” You groan as he starts to move his body gently, thrusting into you without being too hard. “You feel good.” He growls, his face telling you that he is not quite there yet. “You too.” You say comfortingly, stroking his cheek again. For a while, your bodies move in sync with each other, keeping you two just on the edge. “You don’t need to be gentle.” You smirk and he kisses you once more. 

Now, he starts to increase the pace and intensity, making you groan out loud. “That’s what I me-.” You get interrupted by a long and deep grunt, making Ben smirk deviously. He lets out a soft moan, while he still increases his strength. Your whole body is reacting to his strong thrusts, sending waves of pleasure through every fiber of your skin.

“So close.” Ben grunts, keeping eye-contact with you the whole way through it until it’s even too much for him to handle. Both of you scream out in pain and pleasure, reaching new levels of excitement. Before he slides out of you, he leans in for another sweet kiss. “Happy birthday.” He says and drops next to you on to the bed.

“Best birthday ever.” You say exhausted, resting your body against his. He kisses your forehead again and you spend the rest of the night cuddling until you fall asleep.

[outerbankspreferences]

Into the Unknown - Sarah Cameron

Request:  Can you please do a sarah x fem reader were reader is a pogue and they are oposites. Like the reader dresses more sweat shirts and mom jeans. And they are kinda rivals because she’s a pogue but they spend a day together and realize they have feelings for each other. Could you also add in somthing bout not really knowing if reader really like girls but descoverse she’s bi after talking with Sarah (sorry Ik this is vv specific but I’m feeling some sorta way towards sarah so yea)

MASTERLIST

WORD COUNT: 1531

A/N: I hope I portrayed this the way you wanted!

You hated the thought tog going to the Kook academy, but when you got offered a scholarship your parents didn’t want you to give it up. You were an amazing artist, and your art teacher at your old school had helped you get the scholarship. You didn’t come from much. Both of your parents worked fulltime to help support you and your siblings. At first you didn’t want to go because you didn’t want to leave your friends. The Pouges were the closest thing to family you had.

 You only agreed because Kie went there, and said she finally wanted to have some friends. She had a falling out with Sarah Cameron the year prior. “Come on Y/N, it won’t be that bad. You can hang out with me. At least you’ll know someone.” Kie said sitting around the fire. “Oh yeah, hang out with the one who was no friends. Probably not a smart move.” JJ spoke up. Kie slapped him on the arm, “it’s the Kook princess’ fault I don’t have any friends. She told everyone I called the cops on her party.”

 “But you did call the cops on her party. I was with you when you did it.” John B interrupted her. “Okay who’s side are you on? She invited everyone in the school but me. The bitch got what she deserved.” Kie snapped at him. It was an unspoken agreement that none of you liked Sarah after what she did to Kie. They were best friends in grade 9 and then Sarah threw a party and didn’t invite Kie, so she got the party busted. You can still remember her calling you all the time crying, you felt so bad because there was nothing you could do to help her.

 “I plan on keeping my head down until graduation, I don’t want to meet anyone. I’ve got all the friends I need with you guys.” You said leaning back in your chair, watching the fire. “Probably a good idea.” Pope said to you, he knew how nervous you were for this.

 It was finally your first day at the Kook academy. You and Kie shared a room but didn’t have any classes together. She had showed the day before where all your classes were so you wouldn’t get lost, but this place was huge. You had been looking for you AP Art History, when you bumped into someone, “I am so sorry, I wasn’t looking”- You cut yourself when you saw who it was, Sarah Cameron.

 “It’s okay, you’re Y/N, right? I think I’ve seen you at the boneyard a couple of times.” She said smiling. You didn’t really know why but she made you nervous. It was something you’d never felt before. All sudden you had not idea what to say to her. You realized she was waiting for an answer.

 “Uh, yeah that’s right. I’ve seen you there before too.” You confirmed, looking back down at your schedule. ‘don’t talk to her Y/N.’ you thought to yourself.

 “What class are you trying to find. I couldn’t find my way around this place for like a month.” She said grabbing the schedule out of your hand. “Oh, AP Art History, I’m in that class too, follow me.” She said leading you the way to the class.

 She was still looking over your schedule, “it looks like we have a lot of classes together, we should hang out I’ll help you find your way around. Who’s your roommate?” She asked walking fast through the halls, you were struggling to keep up. “Uh Kiara, and I’m sure I could find time to hang out.” You said trying to avoid the topic, Kie would kill you if you hung out with her. You guys made it to class right before the bell rang. “Kie would probably kill you for hanging out with me, it’ll be our little secret.” She said winking at you, and your heart flutter.

 This kept up for weeks, always hanging out, you learned a lot about Sarah. She was an artist too, and you guys spent a lot of timing drawing each other. You would catch yourself sketching her when she wasn’t around, simply drawing her silhouette.

 You’d never felt this way about another girl before. You always assumed that you were into boys, but maybe you were wrong. You and Kiara had gone down to the meal hall to eat supper, a normal night for the two of you. You hadn’t really been paying attention to what Kiara had been talking about, more focused on looking at Sarah. She seemed so confident with her friends, like she was on top of the world.

 “Y/N? Earth to Y/N.” Kie said waving a hand in your face, pulling out of your own little world. “Sorry, what did you say?” You blushed hoping she didn’t realize who you were staring at. “I said, Kelce asked me out for lunch next week, do you think I should go.” She seemed annoyed you weren’t listening in the first place. “I don’t know, he didn’t really have the time of day for back home so what’s different here? I think you should be careful.” You spoke honestly. She looked at you like you had five heads. It wasn’t the answer she wanted, but you were known for speaking your mind with your friends.

 “Well, aren’t you a supportive person.” She said laughing. You felt bad for what you said, not wanting to hurt her feelings. “I’m sorry Kie, I didn’t mean to be rude.” You spoke not wanting to start an argument. “I think I’m just going to go back to the room, I’m tired from volleyball today.” She said getting up, you tried to stop her put she didn’t listen. “Smooth move L/N.” You look up to see Sarah sitting in the place Kiara was sitting.

 “What are you talking about?” You asked even though you knew she just watched the whole encounter happen. “Kie, I know it can be hard living with your friend. We’re all going to the beach tonight if you want to come.” She offered smiling at you. “I don’t know Sarah; I’m not really dressed for the beach.” You gestured to the mom jeans and sweater you wore down to supper.

 “Yeah, I didn’t really want to go to the beach anyways, let’s go down to the art room, I still have to finish my project for Mr. Willis’s’ class. You both grab some snacks and head down laughing to each other. You got your easel all set up and started working on sketch. Sarah but some soft music on in the background to break up the silence. It was the nice thing about your friendship, you didn’t need to speak, just each others company was enough.

 It made you nervous to be alone with her. You were sure her friends didn’t like you, and yours didn’t. “So how did you get into the academy Y/N? I’m not trying to be mean, but I know you’re a Pouge, I thought your parents couldn’t afford something like this.” She asked, careful about how she worded things. “Uh, I got a scholarship, my old art teacher sent some of my work in without me knowing. It was Kiara who convinced me to come. It looks better to art schools apparently. I’m going to need a lot of help if I want to leave the Outer banks.” You explained not looking up from your drawing.

You weren’t normally this open with people, but with Sarah it was just easy. You never felt judge by her, she would let you talk all your problems away and never interrupt you. “Do you want to leave? The Outer banks I mean.” She asked sounding sad you didn’t want to stay. “Yeah, it’s every Pouges dream. I think I still want to live by the ocean, just not here.” You explained. “Sometimes I wish I could just get up and leave today, you know? No explanation just packs a bag and never come back. Go from town to town working a little when I needed the money.” You said looking over at her.

 She was staring back at you. “I wish I knew that freedom. I know you guys think being a Kook we have everything we could ever want, but I would kill for your freedom. I see you guys hanging out having so much fun in the summer. Know cares if you guys are late, or what you wear, or who you with. You don’t have an image to uphold.” You could tell she was being sincere about it. “We’ll leave one day Sarah, just me, you and the open road.” You said giggling, falling in love with the idea. “Promise?” she asked laughing, “Promise.” You replied.

 When you talked to her like this, it was when you knew you loved her. Sometimes you were sad because she was dating Topper, and clearly not interested in women, but you were happy you got to spend these moments with her. Just the two of you talking. Not a Kook and a Pouge, but two friends with a mutual understanding.

TAG LIST: @drewstarkey @fttayla @lemur46 @pita0402

[elizabeth-mitchells]

hello again! i hope i am not bothering you. i am the exiled anon and just wanted to say i think i should have worded my ask better. me wanting to clarify a bit more if that is okay? i just have seen so many awful things in this fandom so i am not quite if it was exiled or not in some of these fics but i have seen leaving and a mixture of terrible mischaracterizations and a lot has blended in together so i am not quite one hundred percent sure on the exiled bit and don’t want to lead anyone astray! nonetheless, fandom is awful and the women deserve better. the mischaracterizations are awful and so is the misogyny and racism too! but also yes!! ur tags in the other ask are one hundred percent right. it’s v much how some of those fics Are TM. tysm if you read and or reply to this! have a good day or night 💗

hi!! not bothering at all!! this is totally okay!!

you're totally right anon. i haven't read one where andy exiles quynh but i wouldn't be surprised it existed! i'm with you. there's way too much awful stuff out there. they are a toxic couple, they are the violent couple, their love is lesser to joe/nicky, they don't express their feelings, they aren't explicitly romantic, they aren't affectionate, quynh is evil, andy is cold, etc etc

i've read enough terrible treatments of the women of tog that i've mostly given up. at this point i only read recommendations or fics from my beloved mutuals that i know and trust.

sadly, the majority of the fandom treats andy, quynh, and nile extremely poorly. and yes, it is absolutely rooted in misogyny and racism of fandom. in this case it feels a bit like a lost case tbh they will turn everything about joe and nicky or booker. it's exhausting!

thanks for sending a message!! totally agreed w you. sorry for going on a little rant. it just reminded me of these huge feelings of disappointment in this fandom lol all we can do is try to follow the right ppl, focus on the little content we have that respects the women of tog, and i highly recommend blocking certain tags 👀 it's self care baby

[eventual-ghoste]

TOG rambling

Hello! This post has to do with Andy and some revelations at the end of Force Multiplied. Spoilers I give aren’t super specific but they’re there, and I can’t promise they won’t bite.

This is also in response to a TOG discord question I couldn’t stop thinking about, regarding Andy’s history as compared to Nicky’s, as posited by Em | salzundhonig:

But Nicky's past as a crusader and his growth from his past was well received, surely that'll be the same with Andy right?

I apologize if these ramblings sound like a rant but I swear my intentions are in the spirit of debate/discourse, and they are not an attack on any individuals.

The TL;DR is: Andy has work to do. Hopefully Hollywood and Rucka don’t fuck that up.

Feel free to check/correct/call me out if I’ve misspoke anywhere here (I realize I still have a lot to learn) but IMHO, I don’t think a semblance of Andy’s growth will be well received. Or, at least, I’m not so certain it should be because, in the comics, I genuinely don’t think Andy has grown. At the end of Force Multiplied, she still defends her actions with the “this is how I grew up” argument, and says it was “a long time ago,” and as much as I love love LOVE Andromache the Scythian for her badassery and how she’s a vision of female empowerment, I can’t help but think about how I hear those words all the time from people defending themselves against racist and/or sexist comments from so-called bygone eras.

Wanna know a sad difference between those people and our beloved Andy? They apologize for what they’ve done, or who they were. As hollow as the words will sound, however unforgivable their actions, however self-serving the apology will be— Those Asshats apologize. Comic!Andy never does, not even when confronted by Nile, an African American woman who likely descends from slaves, and has undoubtedly experienced racism and discrimination on a regular basis. It’s been thousands of years and Andy doesn’t even know how to say sorry (if she ever does, kudos to whoever finds a timestamp/panel, and let me know!). Instead, Andy buries the truth of her actions with a load of justifications to the point that she becomes self-deprecating, calling herself “vermin,” concluding she’s no better than the apathetic, selfish, evil POS they hunt. She may have spent the past millennia with TOG, trying to make things right but then—

But then she gives up. She’s tired. She resigns because she doesn’t have it in her anymore to fight the injustice she once willingly and self-servingly participated in. So, on top of being incapable of apology, Andy also doesn’t vow to do better. She doesn’t accede to change.

If there is one reason for why “The Old Guard” is a fucking absolutely shitty title, is that it refers to people who refuse to accept new ideas and progress. We are in a fandom that has four canonically queer characters, three people of color, and two female leads! Maybe the irony is intentional but damn, why is it that Andy, PROTAGONIST #1, hasn’t completely caught up with the program?

And that brings me to why I think Andy’s reckoning will not be on the same level as Nicky’s. Because as popular as Kaysanova is, neither Nicky or Joe are the main protagonists of TOG.

We don’t follow Nicky or Joe (or Booker) into scenes. The men are strictly back-at-the-ranch, supporting characters. We follow Andy or Nile (who also have the most screen time, I believe, but fact-check me). Filmically speaking, we ought to value them with a measure of precedence. Their words and actions matter the most, especially Andy’s by nature of how everyone looks to her for guidance.

So, with all that in mind: How does one reconcile a beloved protagonist with a despicable past in slavery, of all things? In the wake of an international racial reckoning, how is a celebrated, white South African actress going to fulfill that role? How is production going to balance fantasy with reality? How are Rucka and other involved writers (Theron, Prince-Bythewood?) going to alter the original IP, while retaining the nuance of this moral quandry?

Forgive me for the overkill but: How is it going to happen?

I’m well aware that my thoughts are going down a rabbit hole, and I am definitely overthinking this, but as somebody who’s genuinely curious about whether Victoria Mahoney and the rest of the TOG crew will have the guts to confront the issue head-on, or if they’ll take the easy way out. Excise the bits that no one wants to talk about, much less watch in a feel-good film that TOG has become for many fans.

Whatever production ends up doing, I hope that 2O2G doesn’t end on a cliffhanging “pity Andromache” note because, damn, I’m gonna feel real uncomfortable scrolling through fandom posts, reading people defending slavery and giving the same “the past is a foreign country; they do things differently there” spiel, in order to protect a fictional character played by a conventionally-attractive cis heterosexual white woman.

(Also: If the past is so different from the present, why are there still calls for social justice? Why do ALL industries still lack diverse and equitable representation?)

Now, this is where I’ll go back to the original question and say: While I think Nicky functions well as an example for change/growth/redemption, I don’t think his change serves as a good comparison to Andy’s. I say this, even while I’m aware of double standards in gender, and even between the reception of gay characters vs lesbian characters vs etc. (re: I’m open to critique).

My line of thought stems from the fact that, canonically, Nicky always had Joe. The two have seemingly been inseparable from the moment they first killed each other. It’s likely that Joe would check Nicky whenever he said or did something wrong and offensive, and perhaps this symbiosis was mutual.

(I also have a feeling that many people easily disregarded the Christian/Muslim conflict because A) lack of knowledge in BOTH religions and B) the onscreen couple appear very much in love, especially when one is giving a beautiful monologue on the nature of their relationship. When we meet Joe and Nicky, we meet them at their best. Shout-out to interfaith couples who know more about this than my single (and secular) ass does, and might have more to say about this.)

On the other hand: Andy never had someone who was like how Joe was for Nicky. No one ever calls out Andy because A) she’s the oldest, B) she’s the lead, and C) her business card says ANDROMACHE OF SCYTHIA, WAR GOD. Yeah, she had Quynh/Noriko but— at the risk of yelling at Rucka for vilifying a queer woman of color (or praising him for not leaning on the stereotype of Asian passivity? idk, anyone got thoughts on this?)— Noriko is clearly not encouraging good behavior. Neither will Quynh if Netflix lets 2O2G be as faithful to the comics as TOG1 was.

Which means the Law 282 conversation might be…unavoidable? Somewhere along the line, we still end up in the hotel room with Andy, on the floor, pleading for her crew to not abandon her, even though she is the one who abandoned their cause.

This sets up a circumstance in which Fade Away might be spent trying to redeem Andy/Charlize Theron, bring her back to the “good side,” teaching her to be better— thereby highlighting her experience and “salvation,” rather than making a point of her past, and the reality of her actions. In other words, a “pity the white woman” fest.

(Because I’m crossing my fingers that TOG production/Netflix know better) In an effort to prevent that from happening, I wonder if Rucka will combine Force Multiplied with Fade Away for the 2O2G script. Given the series’ track record, I think it is feasible that FA’s release coincides with 2O2G’s, and that it finally resolves Andy. Whether by revitalizing her energy as a do-some-gooder, or finalizing her vulnerability by putting her 6,000 years to rest, thus handing off the reigns to Nile and a new generation of leadership.

The last thing I want to leave off with is: I don’t hate Andy. It’s a credit to Rucka and fellow writers (from film and fandom) that I don’t.

I might not love her character as enthusiastically as I used to, but that doesn’t mean I’m not amazed by her creation. She’s a female lead whose sexuality is not exploited by the male gaze; whose emotional vulnerability is not considered a hindrance to, nor an explanation for, her battle prowess; and whose unabashed queerness is not reinforced by cookie cutter stereotypes. Andromache the Scythian is AMAZING.

That doesn’t mean I’m going to excuse or ignore her most glaring and contemptible flaw. More than anything, I’d love to sweep her past under the carpet so that 2O2G can be problem-free. Like many people, I just want to enjoy a movie without getting triggered.

I want to see Quynh and Andy kiss and make up. I want to see Joe rocking Those Shorts, and a cheeky shot of Nicky appreciating his ass. I want to see Nile welcoming Booker back to the family again. Some form of group therapy would be chef’s kiss.

But something about glossing over/removing slavery from Andy’s narrative reeks of dishonesty, and reminds me that the (Hollywood) movie industry is full of people who do not want to be tainted with negative perceptions. Understandably, appearances are their livelihood— but that particular truth is something they still have to reckon with.

[wntersfire]

GET TO KNOW ME TAG GAME

Before I start I would just like to say (tw alcohol for now and question 19) sorry for any spelling mistakes or if I ramble a little. To cut a long fuckin story short I mis read the measurements of my shot glasses and so instead of having two cocktails I’ve had the equivalent of four in the space of an hour and a half. Being british, im not gonna let a good drink go to waste either so im onto my third/sixth now.

Tagged by @clints-lucky-arrow (an actual goddess among us mortals)

1. Why did you choose your URL?

So this reason is two-fold. One, I didn’t watch star wars growing up because I was dumb and didn’t understand the politics (it wasn’t until my boyfriend sat me down and explained it literally in January of this year that I actually got it) but I loved Sci-fi and space so the next best thing was Treasure Planet (2003 film, Available on didney+) My favourite scene is the ending when Long John Silver (spoilers) is about leave before he can be arrested and Jim confronts him. Seeing how much his character has grown, Silver says to Jim, “Look at you, glowing like a silver fire. You’re something special, Jim. You’re gonna rattle the stars, you are.” It literally makes me tear up every single time I watch it and its one of my favourite lines of all time. Second, this was actually quoted in one of my favourite book series ‘Throne of glass’ by Sarah J Maas. I adore the character of Celeana and again one of my favourite quotes from TOG is when Queen Elena says to Celeana“ You could rattle the stars. You could do anything, if only you dared.” Every time I read that line I literally get chills and I actually have plans to get this tattooed on me lmao

2. Any side blogs?

Yes my fanfic blog @second-stars-totheright (I like puns and I used to love peter pan)

3. How long have you been on tumblr?

I joined when I was 13 for the fanfiction and lurked for a very long time, just reblogging and liking things until I deleted it when I was 17. Re downloaded the app and got my account back back around February of this year (when I was 19, now 20) and since then I’ve found it much friendlier and actually interacted with people this time around, and actually started posting my work on here!

4. Do you have a queueue tag?

No. This is my general postings blog so I just kind of stick anything funny or worth keeping here, but I probably should make one!

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

As I said to read fanfiction (anyone wondering it was 5 seconds of summer fanfiction. Anyone who judges me in the comments its fair game 🥺) but I re-downloaded it this year because I noticed with my work on Wattpad, while I had some do really well (one has gotten 130k+ views) its very difficult to actually interact with readers and get feedback. I’ve only accumulated that high of a number after 5 years of it being on there, and so tumblr is just so much more personal!

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

I did it this morning as I was getting tagged in this lmao. I wanted a cartoon girl who looked like me but because I had a specific colouring (ie my hair is black with a blonde streak at the front & my eyes have both blue and green segments because I have heterochromia) I couldn’t find any that looked like me so I recoloured a cartoon girl I found on pinterest.

7. Why did you choose you header?

The white clouds fit the stars theme and it looks pretty with the purple. ✨💜

8. Whats your post with the most notes?

“That girl is a problem | Javier Pena x Agent!Reader part 1” with 105 notes on my fanfic blog.

9. How many mutuals do you have?

I am still a little tumblr idiot when it comes to this so if someone could tell me how to find out I'll edit this

10. How many followers do you have?

72 on here, 107 on my fanfic blog (AND I LOVE ALL OF YOU ACROSS BOTH OF THEM MWAH, MWAH KISSES FOR YOU ALL 💜💜💜)

11. How many people do you follow?

165 (it was 700+ but the other day I unfollowed a bunch of accounts that haven’t been active since I followed them when I was 13. There were LOTS)

12. Have you ever made a shit post?

I mean all you have to do is look at the Nomad memes I make (UNAPOLOGETICALLY I might add 😤) for @clints-lucky-arrow to know I absolutely have. That series has a hold over me im telling you. I black out when I start reading and I awake with a bunch of meme editing apps open and my feelings tugged at from her amazing writing.

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

If I’m with my boyfriend which is like two days a week, rarely, but now I’ve finished uni, I’m on here all the god damn time. I feel so comfy and safe interacting with you all, not to mention some of you guys are funny as hell.

14. Did you have a fight with a blog once?

Not really on here, I haven’t received any hate luckily but I prefer not to spoil how comfy I am here with arguing.

15. How do you feel about ‘you need to re-blog this’ posts?

I’m a little confused by this I dunno whether I’ve just never come across any like this or if Stars is being a bimbo on the tl again. However, I only reblog things I’d like to keep for future reference or if something deserves to be shared to everyone else like a fic rec or a piece of art. (As Mack said, I’ve re-blogged so many in the past promising me money or luck and I am still broke as shit so what does that tell you).

16. Do you like tag games?

Yes!! I love reading everyone elses and getting to know my mutals better!

17. Do you like ask games?

Again yesss because it means I get to send love to my mutuals and get to know them better! I tend to not participate though just read their responses because I sometimes feel like I’m bugging people clogging their inboxes even though I know that’s the point idk I’m a hell of an over thinker sometimes 🥳

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

It’s been said before but @clints-lucky-arrow (wow you rlly owning this post bby girl) but I just remember lurking on Nomad early February and liking and reblogging her chapters so I could keep them to re-read cause that’s how much I instantly loved it and when she followed me I realised who she was and lowkey had a starstruck moment bcus id been ciaght up in her work for weeks and too nervous to make contact. Also @arduadastra, I saw her work all over the pedro tags for so long and now I’ve gotten to know her she is the sweetest girl!! We usually fan over Javier Pena gifs together, she’s solely responsible for ‘That girl is a problem’ bcus of her gif sending at 1am giving me Javi thots and now it’s my most successful one on my blog. And most recently @pedrosgirlx followed me this morning and her work is genuinely some of the best I've seen on here, as I said this morning it is the Sistine Chapel ceiling of Mando art it is actually jaw dropping!! I cant believe all these creators are rlly giving us this content for free and yet being so talented AND the nicest people I’ve ever met!!

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

No, although I hold a lot of them dearly as friends. 15/10 would treat you lovelies to a drink of your choice if we ever met (any of you from the uk who drink I’d get you a pitcher from Whetherspoons)

20. Absolutely no pressure tags:

anyone who wants to join! a lot of people I would have tagged have already posted theirs so go for it if you like the look of it!

[ongreenergrasses]

to my mutuals who are just now coming online: buckle up, blacklist #tog screenplay if u need to, and i am SO sorry ✌🏻✌🏻

[bellamyblakru]

HEYYYYYYY i’m so excited to respond to ur ask it made me so happy to see u in my notifs and i’m so excited for u for ur milestone! anyways i kinda want all of them but i decided to cut down to 🥺 :)))) 👀 pls rant i will read it all and ☕️ for morgwen andddd manon from the tog books. <3 <3 :*

HEY AMY!!! i hope you had a lovely day today🥺thank you for the ask💞

🥺- for my mutuals, ill talk about why i follow you and why everyone should be as well

omg im pretty sure i met and started following you like the day of that bellamy scene™️ because i remember thinking how fucking horrendous that episode ended, and, at the same time, how amazing that night on tumblr was aksnakaaj. so that night, tumblr was a fucking disaster and chaotic and funny asf. i remember texting @tkstrrand the entire ep (bc she couldn’t watch it for some reason) like how boring it was/how she wasn’t missing much blahblah and then when the death scene happened at the last fucking second, i sent her about a thousand separate incoherent texts in the span of like two minutes LOL tumblr was in shambles and i made a few posts about how fucking dumb the show was—one post i made i told my few new followers to fuck the 100 and just watch merlin and you texted me about it!! we have literally so much in common (with merlin, atla, the 100, tog!!!) that when you texted me about how you felt about that scene compared to merlin’s ending, my thought was like “this blog is so kind and we feel the same way and i need to follow asap.”

you are literally so sweet and lovely to talk to🥺that night™️ may had been disastrous, but i can look on it with a lighter heart because we met because of it!! every time we talk i always smile so much (and dw, i know i still have to get clone wars for our boy anakin👀👀)

dude, everyone should be following you because your blog is incredible, your tags are superb, and you are literally one of the sweetest people i’ve met on here😭💞 i adore you.

👀 - and ill tell you a parallel from merlin or the 100 that still fucks me up

this post for merthur still FUCKS ME UP by @camelotsheart

THE EYES. THE GIFSET’S BEAUTIFUL COLORING. THE EYES. EYES. I CANT. THIS GIFSET HAUNTS ME. parallels, man, i fucking love them.

☕️ + send me a ship/character/movie/book and ill give you my opinions on it

my opinions on morgwen:

I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I SHIP IT WITH MY WHOLE ASS SOUL. dude, their potential as a ship is incredible😭i fucking love them together. i wrote them as a side pairing in my first multi-chapter merthur fic and i adored writing their interactions and dynamic sm. if morgana was going to be with anyone, my first choice will always be gwen. i also read them as a pairing in fics all the time because the pure power-couple potential is insane.

hot ☕️ here™️: i think if someone was to bring morgana back from the brink of hatred, it should have been gwen (not merlin). so, like, i could definitely see merlin telling her about his magic and whatnot and maybe that would have stopped her from going dark side...but...i didn’t think merlin should have (ekk probably an unpopular opinion).

see, i love merlin with my entire heart..and tbh telling uther fucking pendragon’s ward that he had magic was just too much of a gamble—especially with arthur’s life on the line, which literally became merlin’s sole purpose in life (another matter for a different essay™️). i understand his need to keep it a secret from her even more when the large reptile repeatedly got into merlin’s head that she was bad news from the jump (also another matter for a different essay™️).

SO. that leaves two options for our miserable magical gal: arthur or gwen. now, i honestly believe arthur wouldn’t have hurt her if he was told. and i even think he may have became more sympathetic to the magical community because of it—especially when he saved mordred wayyyy early on that cemented the fact that arthur was not uther. but i can also understand why morgana wouldn’t tell arthur, and it’s pretty much the same reason merlin didn’t tell her about his magic: the risk was too big and she didn’t want to gamble her life with an unknown reaction.

now we get to the main point: gwen would have been the best option for her. whether it is platonic or not, gwen was always there for morgana. gwen is such a kind, loving soul, and she deeply respected and adored morgana—you can tell by the way she smiled around her in the beginning seasons, how she would get her flowers, how she would worry about morgana’s wellbeing. even though gwen was morgana’s servant, she cared for her in more ways than were required and it showed. they were best friends. the entire incident with gwen’s father, which was horrendous, might be the reason gwen would be rightfully upset about the subject of magic; however. she knew her father wasn’t magical, she knew uther was a tyrant, and she knew morgana’s heart. someone is gonna tell me that if morgana had explained to gwen what happened, how her magic was innate, how morgana would never fucking choose to have magic anywhere near her shithead guardian (who probably would have killed her imo if he knew bc you know the whole “fire will purify” bullshit), that gwen would hate her??? I MEAN LITERALLY WATCH THE LAST EPISODES AGAIN. when QUEEN GWEN realizes that the whole time it was merlin saving everyone’s asses, and she connected all the dots, her face showed nothing but pure understanding and acceptance.

gwen was such an underused character. her fucking potential arcs could have been phenomenal (again, LOL, another matter for a different essay™️), and the way canon made morgana use gwen was fucking gross and im not a fan🙃 but fuck canon. i ship them and i love them to pieces ✌🏻thank you for coming to my talk✌🏻

my opinions on manon mf blackbeak:

oh boy, where do i start? i would die for her...is that too extreme for the starting place? i fucking LOVE manon blackbeak dude. oh my god, so, remember when her and aelin fought for the first time in QoS? i remember jumping up from my lounging position with my hand over my smiling mouth because i love both of these badass hardcore women with everything i am. i mean, aelin owns my ass (she is probably my favorite character of all time rn) but manon hits differently. her storyline at the beginning was so bleh, but, man, did it escalate fast to “holy shit” to “i fucking love her” to “oh fuck im sobbing.”

the only thing i will complain about with her character in canon was the fact that my girl was straight???? excuse me?? she has been alive for fucking forever and she is straight? no. i cant accept that. tbh i ship manon and elide🥺 (i also ship dorain and chaol oops). but her character development was everything and i cant think too long on what happens because i will start crying tbh sksjsmakks

okay wow im so sorry for, uh, spilling every thought i had into this. it legit took me like a day to respond 😔

i appreciate you so much. thank you🥺💞

[fonulyn]

ok, lets hear it tog modern au this is too much work but want

for this meme! (thank you for indulging me 💖)

SO. it has been my lifelong dream to write proper mutual pining?? but I am so impatient it always ends up with half a page of pining and then they end up schmoopily confessing to each other and there we are again back in Fluff Town rotting our teeth away. this is my attempt number 928491 at proper pining? :’D

they’ve been friends for years, and neither thinks the other one likes them back altho there’s a lot of feelings and like. I’m thinking Joe goes through a bad breakup, moves to Nicky’s couch for a while just to nurse his wounds and be with his bff, but somehow he never leaves. and eventually they realize they’re living the best domestic life together and neither says anything bc they’re too scared to break the balance of it. the whole what if I confess but he doesn’t feel the same??? :O

but of course he does. cue happy ending and snuggles. ta-da. (god I’m so boring and predictable :’D)

I only have the beginning written but here;

“I really appreciate this, Nicky,” Joe says, for probably the eleventh time that day, all earnest and grateful and really, really unfairly gorgeous with the way he’s looking straight at Nicky from big honest eyes. “I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”

This time, Nicky doesn’t even grace him with an answer other than a quick smile. He’s made it abundantly clear that his home is also his best friend’s home whenever needed, and there are really no more words he can say to underline it any further. He only grabs the next cardboard box from the back of the car Joe rented and hauls it up into his apartment. Into their apartment, for the foreseeable future, he reminds himself. It’s obviously only temporary, it’s only until Joe gets back on his feet and gets a place of his own. But neither of them set a time limit for that, and secretly, in the deepest depths of his heart, Nicky hopes that it will take a long, long time before that happens.

He is selfish, he knows. While he’s genuinely sorry to see Joe so sad after the spectacularly bad breakup he just went through, and he wishes nothing but happiness for his friend, there’s a curl of contentment in the pit of his stomach knowing that the raging asshole is now out of the picture. For good. He never really liked the guy, never really understood what Joe saw in him. And if he has always hated every single person Joe has ever dated, well, he’s not admitting to anything.

Nicky is working on it. He truly is. One of these days he’ll be able to grant his friend the happiness he deserves without resentment and jealousy. Without wishing it was him.

aaaaaand now watch me last like two pages with the pining before I already push them together bc I’m hopeless :’D

thank you for the ask 💖

[wardog-of-the-endless]

3, 10, 19, (THE TABLES TURN-coffeebeannate)

HOW DARE YOU TURN THE TURNED TABLES. 

3. Do you prefer canonverse or AUs? Yes? Nate, you're asking questions I don't have witty answers to, how dare you. Ahahah, the extremely short version is I don't really have a preference. It's a mood-based thing, an AU based thing, a vibe based thing, a rabid fan thing? There are days I'm down for the canonverse. There are days that nothing is better than the coffee shop or royal/prince AU you're pondering. (Please write them, I am here for it.) There are days canon just totally pissed me the fuck off, I will consume all alternate media in my path. I will comment, I will kudos, I will reblog and shout my adulation from rooftops. I'm sorry. ALSO: There are fic writers I would very much bow to in the street, I would lay down my best frock coat over a puddle so they need not step in it, I would discreetly offer my hand so that they may alight into their carriage and depart... I will read and obsess over and quote and screech about their fic. I might climb into a new canonverse or fandom for them. Whatever it is, short of triggers, I'll probably be down for it.

10. Mutual pining or enemies to friends to lovers? Now you're just being mean, dude. Both, is it too much to ask for both? I've probably written more mutual pining than friends to lovers, truth be told. That's just where I would say previous MARVEL fic and even some of my really old fandom stuff I won't talk about here has landed... But I would like to write a ton more, for both, in my current fandoms. Reading friends to lovers is pretty common (but it features a lot of mutual pining?) in my current high-octane fandom addiction of choice (The Old Guard).  

19. What’s your favorite character headcanon? I'm super into the mundane foodie aspects of certain TOG characters? Like I love the idea of Nicky and Joe being big foodies and loving to cook/bake for their family when they have the opportunity and means. Not on a high stakes job, sure, but when they're on a break or in a low-key situation like stakeouts prepping for a job, maybe. Nicky baking pastries and bread, Joe breaking out some fabulous dishes in his repertoire. I just love that for them. So yeah, soft foodie based comfort headcanons, a thing.