#this took so much longer than it shouldve lmao

[doomedclockworkdotmp3]

ahaaa. redraw of this oldass drawing

[fischlich]

this took. way longer than it shouldve anyways i was tired of not knowing how much leg to draw each unit with in relation to each other so i made this. i eyeballed heights and took a couple liberties with the designs but its fine

also eule elster and ara are in low pixel hell bc i just scaled them up from a previous drawing and did not want to reline them LMAO i made this as a ref largely for myself anyways

[suethesocks]

Max 10 Speedrun

I have not posted in over 6 months so now i need to catch up on all the ben 10 art i have not posted hueheuhe. Also have some asks which i will get to !!

Swampfire! Tried to honor the bloomed design with the collar and bright fingers even though i really hate it in the show (lol) also gave him 1 eye to represent his weak eyesight. Also the weakness i gave him about the fire burning him shouldve been a thing in the show tbh

Echo echo, tried to go for a more boomboxy vibe bc yk boomer Max. I like the idea of aliens looking extremely different while still being the same species (not a subspecies like murk and perk gourmands, thats cool too but different)

Humungo. I actually was never a big fan of him lmao, i always thought you need to do more with him than just "dinosaur" especially with that color scheme he has in the show. I got the idea to give him feathers to show the drastic change in age also bc i love chicken dinos and think they should appear more. Fun fact the power change come from what i used to think his powers worked like when i was a kid

Jeffrey!! One of my fav aliens ever. Not much about this is special just bigger with different colors. I also took a few notes from the concept art with the weirdo shaped eyes and having his body be a mantaray with legs sticking out to make him less humanoid, since ben's jetray design looks more like a man with wings than a mantaray with legs yk?

Another screenshot redraw!! This is the only other one ive done sadly, i really oughta make more screenshot redraws tbh. This one is of the scene where kevin and ben get chased by the entire frickin fbi or something for stealing a video game. I imagine in this version max chases after them and comes for the rescue

Lodestar! Never been much of a special alien. Design on the right is made by me aswell since i wanted to do my own spin on bens lodestar (basically the same just give him longer arms). Once again he has 1 eye to represent max's eyesight problems

Brainstorm! Instead of giving him specially weaker eyesight i made his shell cover his eyes as the way to visually represent that (as well as the classic squinty eyes i have going on for each alien

Also i got asked while making this how come maxstorm is so big when psychobos is also old and visibly smaller, and my answer to that was that third image. In my head i always saw psychobos as sort of disfigured and mutated, and not representative of what is typical for his species. If he were to turn into a human thatis what i think hed look like

Goop! I always loved goop, and the idea of a ufo antigrav device helping him navigate because hes not built for earths gravity is a super unique and cool idea. However i i wanted to go for something entirely different with my goop since i never liked the idea of the omnitrix creating non-clothes for the user (bc then you have to consider that it would create a respirator for ripjaws, and thats lame)

And thats all!! Id expect myself to have made as many Max 10 drawings since i stopped posting as before, but sadly i have slowed down significantly over time, especially on max 10. Im not really happy about it and im trying to be a fast artist again but its not coming to me. On the brightside though, ive got a fair bit of other Ben 10 stuff to show!!

[liverpool-enjoyer]

footballers as taylor swift songs

requested by my swiftie in Christ @yudgefudge!! thank you luv <3

leo: you're on your own, kid. ive been associating him w this song way before i knew that everyone else was doing the same lmao. it rlly does encompass his entire journey, from humble beginnings n jus being a little kid playing for fun (from sprinkler splashes/to fireplace ashes), to being the best in the world n all the struggles that come with it (i search the party.../just to learn that my dreams arent rare). the man gave his blood sweat n tears like hed be saved by a the "perfect kiss" which here is a metaphor for the wc obviously. n ohmygosh "everything you lose is a step you take"!!!! BRUH???!?!?! every line, from "i didnt chose this town (ie paris)/i dream of getting out/theres just one who could make me stay", to "the jokes werent funny, i took the money/my friends from home dont know what to say" are all SO leo coded.

ney: anti-hero. i ADORE him n theres a lot of people that like him. but theres also a lot of people who like not liking him. hes one of the best in the world, and as great as that is, he has, unjustifiably so, garnered a significant amount of haters (its me, hi, im the problem, its me/at tea time, everybody agrees). hes rlly endured a ton of it throughout the years, but keeps going (pierced through the heart/but never killed). after facing so much backlash, youd probly worry about the people that still support you and how much longer you can hold on to that (one day i'll watch as youre leaving/and life will lose all its meaning). also, hes a rich person. which makes the bridge pretty relatable for him but like in a funny way.

gavi: nothing new. this one is more based off my inner musings than actual like evidence. i have no idea whats going on this lil dudes head. but i know that IF i were in his position, i'd relate to this song a FUCK TON. its basically a song abt being in the spotlight, n being the shiny young thing that has peoples attention. but what happens when thats not true anymore? (Lord, what will become of me/once ive lost my novelty?) what happens in a few years when an even younger prodigy comes around n impresses everyone? (are we only biding time 'til i lose your attention?/and someone else lights up the room?/people love an ingénue). im not gonna write down the whole birdge but its basically abt the inevitably of meeting your replacement. the song basically asks: "will you still want me/when im nothing new?" he seems like a happy dude who probly doesnt think abt this stuff, but if i were a famous promising young soccer player, this stuff would definitely weigh on my mind.

muller: the story of us. Lord forgive my mullendowski heart. i tried to think of a song that would fit jus him n leave shipping out of it but,,, yeah it wasnt happening. in my mind theyre a package deal. anywho the song's about being around someone youre still in love with after youve broken up (now im standing alone in a crowded room/and we're not speaking and im dying to know/is it killing you like its killing me). ik theyre on good terms n all but in my mindbrain i imagine him them being in the same place for the first time since lewy left him bayern and poor thomas jus "nervously pulling at my clothes/and trying to look busy." and my gosh "but you held your pride like you shouldve held me"??? the AUDACITY. i can go off about this whole song tbh. oh n also even tho speak nows a country album this song is kinda,,, rock/punk-ish kinda??? which is to say, its very loud. much like a certain someone. fun fact i almost put seven for him bc of "before i learned civility/i used to scream ferociously/anytime i wanted" but i figured one line wasnt enough for me to put the whole song.

mbappe: evermore. this is a brooding song. a depression song. so i can definitely see this as a post 2022 world cup final song for him. it actually relates to a sports loss very well. (i used to listen to this song n think a oikawa from haikyuu,,, heh). if theres one thing abt mbappe its that hes dedicated. i can see him "replay(ing) my footsteps on each stepping stone/trying to find the one where i went wrong," yknow, jus thinking abt the final over n over. very "i rewind the tape but all it does is pause/on the very moment all was lost." but at the end of it all, hes young, hes talented, n has more world cups ahead of him. ie: "i had a feeling so peculiar/this pain wouldnt be for/evermore."

klopp: dear reader. this whole song is just advice. its taylor dishing out advice to her fans, most of whom are younger than her. kloppo loves his players, he wants to give them good advice that applies not only on the pitch, but off it as well. (dear reader/bend when you can, snap when you have to/dear reader/you dont have to answer, just cause they asked you) however its no secret that our lovely manager can be pretty hard on himself. so its possible that while he gives advice to those he loves, he feels like hes not worthy of giving it (you wouldnt take my word for it/if you knew who was talking).

again, everything stated is speculation, fueled entirely by my delusional lil mindbrain. as i dont know these ppl.

[thefluxqueen]

HIIII :) here to ask about the abyss tell me about it please please please love this sort of thing :3

HAIIII welcome :) to preface this im normal i swear. anyway The Abyss is what i like ta call my Horrible Horrible Maze, i made it w/ the goal of making the worst possible experience in minecraft to torment my friends ^_^

I enjoy putting people in situations and studying them :D 

On that note! everyone who runs the abyss (24 people at current count) I time and write a couple notes on them! the abyss is honestly half maze half personality test LMAO. at current moment the quickest time goes to @ghostpajamas with a baffling 03:24 (wild that he got out so quick, i win tho cause i haunt his dreams), and longest goes to the beloved @rendogdomesticated with 1:35:54 <3 special shout out ta my dearest @theoctagon tho wolff ur insane i love u. guy goes inta the abyss for fun and has like 10 pages and counting of insane person phsyical notes tryna map it out (hes reported that hes gone through the first one 60 times and the 2nd one 5 jesus chriiiistttt). the abyss is fond of Pilot :) also if wolff is the favourite than @potionofinstantdamage is the Least favourite, rude ass set the place on fire when he got stuck in there :( oof ouchie

Highlights from my notes include @quack-city running backwards and upon me asking Why, simply replied “what if there’s slenderman :(‘ ... cant argue w/ that! he also hadda stop mid run so we decided its funnier if he’s just stuck in there forever. @newtbeetle was in there for like an hour and would NOT shut up about Paul Dano the whole time which was a time (love u beebs. ur isnane). my two test runners are @kishdoodles and @officialgleamstar and they had about the same time but like Opposite reactions it was very funny, kish treated it like they were a streamer n kept a like constant chatter, and travvy was like DEAD silent the whole time n Intensely focused akjewkjr tbh outta all 24 runners trav’s been prob the most like, methotical bout it? LIKE I SAID personality test. i Love studying people. 

In regards to its origins I came up w/ the idea back in like feb/march ish of this year and from start to finish it took me like 2 weeks ish i was on the Grind. u dont understnad how much black concrete this thing took. hell on earth,,, darkwoods has an economy/shopping district and i bought out like All the sand/gravel available akjwekjr the rest i hadda gather myself n God gravel sucks. also ive killed So Many Squids. the 2nd abyss was much easier ta gather supplies for cause i could ask for help w/ supplies n i kept the first one a Complete secret minus my test runners (i hadda bitch at SOMEONE while makin it or i wouldve died i think. speakin of the first abyss has a death count of 13 and the 2nd one has like, 5 or somefin? rlly shouldve writen that down akjwerjk those are Entirely me dying in the process of buildin them btw. its not a true Spain Build unless its mildly dangerous <3) The 2nd one also made me learn redstone, notably i specifically studied Tango’s decked out process vids from s7, tho i really only stole like two aspects of it n i couldnt even get one ta work properly LMAO

The second abyss took me like, wayy longer ta make, bout two months ish (i finished it like mid july). not necessarily in actual like, time spent building but cause in the process of makin it i had Two month long events i was in (Voiceteam in may and Art fight in july) so that distracted me a bit wkwnekeneie Im a bit more secretive bout the second abyss in general since not That many people have actually ran it compared ta the first n theres actually like, Things that can be spoiled in there <3 i like seein peep’s initial reactions its much more satisfying.

This didnt happen w/ everyone but i think a like, Core part of running the abyss is getting emotionally attached ta weird things. i wouldve said just torches until a few days ago when Tac (onea the rat server mods) ran it and claimed the stack of pumpkin pies i gave her as family. But Prior Ta That several people have had very intense emotions bout the redstone torches, whether love or hate or both, key example ft dog: 

Also not everyone ive mentioned on this post is in darkwoods! ive got a server i world editted the abyss inta so non-server members can run it for fun and profit (more data for me) :) on that note ive been slowly infecting the rat gang server cause my friend’s in there alot n another friend of mine’s a mod so peeps in there’ve been runnin it lately :) shout out ta TalonMC for lettin me subject him ta the Horrors literally our first conversation, onea my more fun first impressions i’d say

In regards to lore the abyss is a parasitic entity that infects anyone who gets stuck in there n slowly compells them ta go build their own lmao. note that ive only called the second abyss the Second one and not Abyss 2, because its technically just The Abyss as well cause theres many of them i just made it second wowjdkenejd (a real example of this is Wolff gettin obsessed w/ the abyss n then goin n buildin his own build called the Tower :) very excited bout that) The Abyss has a weird like fucked up warlock bond w/ my goddess oc The Overseer :D Her design’s vaugely based off my irl friend @hotcollectionoftubs cause her creation The Hole on a creative world her n some other friends of mine are on was onea the main insperations for certain aspects of the abyss’ lore :D mainly the teal in the colour palette and the whole ‘the [hole/abyss] provides’ thing. 

(my reference images for her and 3rd pic's art i commissioned from the Lovely @opuntie):

my darkwoods chara, Snake, is a whole nother bag entirely (basic gist is they’re a dimension traveler not by choice and darkwoods is the 3rd world theyve been in, their deal’s worth a whole post of its own lmao) i built the first abyss entirely unrelated ta my chara just as like, fun weird build ta torment my friends w/o yaknow? but then as i was buildin the 2nd one i was like hmmmmmm. alotta things could make sense if i made this one built by Snake. so their retirement arc on darkwoods turned inta even MORE trauma! wahoo! poor guy deserves a break,,, (he will not be getting one). 

(pre abyss + post abyss. i gotta properly draw pre-darkwoods Snake at some point but this dudes changed Alot ill say that lmao. both crops from bigger pieces on my art blog @fluxydrawings)

Anyway thats basically it! ive got more details and things locked in my brain ill probably remember in like 2 days after postin this so theres a chance ill reblog this w/ extra shit later lmao, sides that tho the abyss is my babygirl n thank yall for showin interest ^_^

Memes n shit to end us off:

[coridallasmultipass]

Vent personal medical long post

Im so fucking sick of being in such bad back pain, nothing is going right for me

I was ready to go to the store for groceries bright and early, but I have to wait for a medication delivery which usually comes between 10-12. This means I have to be sitting downstairs the entire time, since I physically cannot reach the door fast enough if im in my upstairs room. (Even when I'm not injured, its been a problem!)

My mom, grandpa, and I all need the store. But I can't go, even if we take two trips (mom takes grandpa, comes back and takes me), because in the past when we had to do this, granpda decided to go hang out in the garage and not notice the delivery. So i HAVE to be home and ready until it arrives.

Its fucking bullshit that the online pharmacy REQUIRES signature for delivery (they didnt for my first couple shipments, ive been on this med for a while now). Its an ability issue because the delivery people dont wait around more than like 30 seconds. Its a convenience issue because then I have to block out my whole day just in case they come late. (I took a chance and made a phone appointment for 240pm).

So i wait all fucking day. 240 rolls around (my mom downstairs said shed listen for the delivery) and id been waiting in the only place i Know gets cell reception in my room and i dont get the call. 15 minutes later, I get a voicemail notif. Fucking great. I never got the call because i live in a fucking deadzone. I have to get up and lean over my counter and plants to get mildly better reception by the window (i am injured and this was extremely painful for my back). Appointment finished thankfully, but i didnt tell the psych how bad i am rn, because i did not have the energy to stand at the window longer than needed to get refills.

Still no delivery. My mom takes grandpa to the store. My back is all aggravated from sitting on the hard/no back support chairs downstairs all day (i cant go to the couch because its too hard to get up from while im hurting/its hard even when im not hurting because its got the footstool added onto it so its like as long as a bed)

So i sit downstairs more while crying because the pain is getting worse, but no one else was home so i had to. They return and my mom is like 'okay lemme take you now' uh, no!! Grandpa isnt gonna sit around for it. And also. Im hurting way too much, i physically cannot go to a grocery store at this point after sitting with no back support all day and twisting over my plants for the phone.

Mom says shell listen for the door again bc i cannot sit downstairs any more. I get maybe 5 minutes and my back starts to relax a little and my mom comes and goes 'i gotta go get gas so i cant listen for the door'

FUCK, MAN. WHY DIDNT YOU DO IT WHILE YOU GOT GROCERIES?! To top it off, she pushed in the chair i was sitting in (its extremely painful to twist! So pulling it out to sit is super hard for me!) I sit there and its unfuckingbearable i see a ups truck drive around our private street and leave, so theyre probably not coming today, and im in excruciating pain so i go back to my room crying and shaking lmao

My mom gets annoyed with me for complaining about the chair (AGAIN!) And rolls her eyes when i say she shouldve got gas before, like

Fuck off man i am in such bad pain i should be in the fucking er right now

If id known id be downstairs all day i wouldve taken a pain killer but its too fucking late in the day for me to take one now because i gotta take 2 different sleeping meds to get any sleep at all and i dont want them to interact

I fucking hate everything about this man

Oh, and i was gonna contact verizon support about being in a deadzone but it was like "lets fix dropped calls. We recommend: Call us now!" DID YOU NOT SEE THE PART ABOUT DROPPED CALLS. The only other option was to instant message and i dont have the spoons for that right now, i just wanted to send like an email ticket or something

Im supposed to be in a 5g area but its literally a deadzone in my whole house and property, no bars of reception at all, and this isnt a mountainous part of town! Ughhhh

I hate not having the ability to do all of this normally, having an injury is making everything Nightmare Mode difficulty. Having tmj treatment (teeth aligners and mouth guard) is making eating a Nightmare Mode task. Even chewing soft ramen was excruciating. I cant physically cook because of my back and im out of easy food (see: planned grocery trip for today which never happened) so its like. Okay. Guess im not having dinner. Especially not after how badly my back got aggravated today.

And guess what. Im gonna have to do it all again tomorrow now since the delivery isnt gonna happen today. Ill take a painkiller tomorrow, but the uncomfortable chairs is a fact of life i will not be able to escape, since i HAVE to be able to reach the door in like 30 seconds.

All of this couldve been prevented if theyd just let me get a no signature delivery. Its a private street no one comes all the way up to our house, like the only mail theft we had was at the mailboxes on the main street (before we got a locked one).

I COULD call the pharmacy next time to ask, but then were back to the issue of trying to make a phonecall from this house! I had issues last month where i couldnt log in to order my rx because they wanted 2fa and because i live in a dead zone i couldnt get the confirmation texts or calls! It SUCKS. (And i cant do wifi calling because our internet is shit and has like a 5 second lag)

Life has been so fucking miserable for me for like the past 2 months and the last 2 weeks have been even worse because of my back going out and its not getting better.

I cant get into physical therapy because the local place isnt accepting new patients! So like. Thats great. Dunno what i can do about that since i cant go out of town.

Im seeing the chiro but i couldnt get in today because i had the rx delivery and phone appointment lmao (also i was really hurting after the last visit)

Guess im just supposed to suffer lmao

This shit is fucking ridiculous and im so sick of it

The sad thing is that it could be worse. Its been a few months since my last endo flare up and i havent been able to stop worrying about that looming spectre either

That really would be the fucking cherry on top lmao

But the back injury situation is sadder because its something that CAN be treated, its just that treatment is unattainable for me due to living in a small rural town and not having a car. I dunno if i even could drive in this much pain tbh its hard enough being a passenger

So thats my vent. Things really fucking suck for me rn. I just want today to be over. Im in too much pain.

[cosmictobios]

SHE KNOWS - MIYA ATSUMU [ smau ]

author’s note: no, this isn’t the normal formatting for a smau but this is based off of a tiktok trend so i think it’s fitting? i also forgot to take screenshots in between texts and i’m too lazy to do it again/fix it <3

[maschotch]

I will die on the hill that the foyet arc was the last truly well done villain arc of the show (or maybe the best overall). Doyle was great in season 6, but the way they ended it in season 7 SUCKED. Everything about foyet, the fact that he won, the fact that they didn’t drag it out longer then it needed, the fact that it ended with hotch literally letting out years and years of pent up rage and murdering foyet. It didn’t feel over done, foyet didn’t feel over the top. He was scary not because he was absolutely op, because at the end of the day, he was a human, and he felt like he could be someone real. The replicator plot, mr scratch, cat adams, they didn’t come close because they either 1) just messed up the ending or 2) dragged for too long OR 3) they were just so overpowered that they almost didn’t feel connected to the real world. Foyet actually had a lasting impact. Hell, the rest of season five for me was almost impossible to watch because it just felt......depressing? I finished 100 and the end of his arc and that’s how I remember foyet. The unsub who actually won, who actually destroyed the life of a main character. Even if the other unsubs had their one good episode, I never finished their arcs with such a impactful feeling as I did with foyet.

i totally agree. read the first sentence and was like >>:( ready 2 defend doyle lmao but ur right the s7 thing just killed it. i think they did the build up to foyet better... idk i just like the way we see emily unravel.. hotch falling apart waiting for foyet to attack again just... ugh those eps are so miserable lmao

everything u said ab the overpowered unsubs is so fucking true. like its ridiculous that everyone has to have like a 182309 IQ and be a computer genius and also an expert chemist and have access to funds and jahwejfnakjcha like shut UP. foyet being just a man.. there's something so special about that. he just had so much patience.. and self control that rivals hotch's. but he was only ever just a man

that being said there are definitely some things that bring that whole arc way down. like haley dying for Man Pain... like oof. come on guys. we're better than that. haley's better than that. hotch is better than that. and the way they handled his return to work was just.. awful askjdhlgkj like ik they were probably scrambling for a way for hotch to stay on the team so he doesnt leave the show lmao but honestly he shouldve left. i mean there is the matter of pride. like if hotch quit his job then that's just another thing foyet took away from him. but like.. ur son is worth more than that lol maybe go be a dad for a bit

first two eps of season 5.... iconic. i love to see hotch suffer <3 but they took it to the point where even i was uncomfortable akjsdhgl like i love to see my chars get hurt bc im a freak or whatever but like.. man. what they did to hotch was fucking brutal. the team's reaction is also just... very well done akshdgl. like.. he's not infallible anymore. he plays that strong stoic role so well that i think its easier for them to forget that he really is just some guy like he's flesh and blood just like they are. reid and garcia's conversation "i dont think ive seen him blink" like they barely register him as human. not in a bad way.. i think its their own coping mechanism.. like no matter what they'll have hotch there to lead them and pull them back to their feet. and that picture shattered. vs morgan and emily who have a different perspective. morgan would think of hotch like reid/penelope but his experiences with his own father definitely doesn't let him delude himself into thinking anyone is completely safe/untouchable. so he worries but he worries with anger bc of how afraid he is of losing the man who means so much to him. emily never really saw him in the role the others see him as.. they all "grew up" with him, like he was there from the beginning of their careers as a profiler. emily views hotch more on equal ground, so hers really is just the concern of a friend.

i dont think criminal minds does well with overarching plots like that. they really do drag on for so long and getting like a five minute mention for 5/10 episodes in a row before getting back to the Unsub of the Week just feels.. weird. (which is why i think the build up to doyle felt so much more natural. she was actively trying to distract herself and act normal.) the replicator was kinda fun like he wasnt as annoying as some of the others. but yeah the hitmen arc and mr scratch... both of those dragged on for SEASONS and like oh my fucking god i dont give a shit anymore ajskhdlg every time i rewatch i care just as little as i did before. it just takes way too long

[swordmaid]

YES YES YES TO ALL YOUR POINTS!! they dont want to hold her accountable so they throw the fatui in the mix when as far as i rembeber they were not even mentioned in the 1stAQ. wtf.

also did they just think we'd accept that ei just did an oopsie just bec yae said so??? i like yae but maybe they shouldve involved her in the 1st AQ made her conspire with ayaka idk but i feel like they didnt give her chracter justice and that she was just there to excuse ei

the build up with kokomi was good and even the new islands but they got like 2min lol i even read one comment saying teppei had a longer bigger impact than kokomi wc is so funny bec it's true! and with what you mention about the inazumans i actually didnt realize that and it makes so much sense but then they just became voices to push us when youre right it shouldve been their fight PLUS it wouldve made more sense since we didnt want to fight in the war in the first place!

it has so much potential! and it's sad im so sad bec i love the quests and the story they make! i even loved the walking scene lol but i guess they spent the budget there and not writing their plot properly :/

exactly!!! if you didn't do the taratsuna quest, the fatui had like, NO presence in the story at all. if they wanted to make them THE bigger threat, signora should've been a present in the get-go. there should be more quests where signora does questionable things but she uses her schneznaya diplomat card to get away scott free. there should be more tension between the tri-commission and the fatui, but no one is willing to cross the line because that's going to break the 'peace' that they have. and the kujuo clan allying up with the fatui would even be more impactful, and that would add more depth to sara's character and even ayaka's tbh.

like there should really be more scenes with the inazuma characters where their faith in their archon is compromised because of what's happening; like either the scenario is kind of forcing them to defy the shogun or they have to do something they don't personally believe in. raiden's pursuit of eternity should be more emphasized not just with the story reminding us over and over that that's what she wants, rather, because of the actions that she's doing and the effects it has on people. the vision hunt decree is one way to do it but why not make it go further you know? to the point that she's harming the people that her friends died for. like she's so obsessed with her pursuit of her own eternity, and her own loneliness and everything that came in between that she loses her own focus, and then it took all the people to rally up and join their voices for her to route back again.

and yes they should've incorporated yae more! AT LEAST, introduce her in 2.1 story because if you didn't do the sakura cleansing ritual, again, you wouldn't even know who she is. there should be scenes where she's overseeing everything, either through her shrine maidens or her fox form or whatever.

and HONESTLY yeah teppei had more impact on the story than kokomi that's so sad LOL. if kokomi was such a good strategist why not show it? they keep telling us X character is good at something, Y character is good at something but they're not showing it!! and that's such a poor way to story tell. like why not have kokomi band the tri-commission together to fight against the shogun--or rather, what's left of the kajuo + the kamisato and also the other one (i forgot the name lol) since if the tri-commission is representing the people of inazuma, and their people ARE being harmed, isn't it their job to protect them? that would be in kokomi's interest since they have a common enemy now--the fatui-- so it would make sense to take advantage of that situation AND further her own cause. like honestly after everything i can really see people dropping raiden and following the sangonomiya clan bc kokomi stood up for them more than raiden ever did LOL. which is why again, i said i won't be surprised if an uprising in inazuma starts.

and YAH it has so much potential but it was just poorly executed!! like the cool cutscenes and animations aren't going to distract us from the poor writing and i'm NOT even asking for like a super in depth story or whatever, i just want it to make SENSE and that one did not even meet that bar. i really am not a fan of how they just gave raiden another personality so she won't be held accountable for the shit that happened. and besides, if baal was supposed to be the 'kind' ruler, wouldn't it make sense if ei was the more ruthless one? and it's really just disappointing because they just keep saying over and over that the shogun's pursuit of eternity is unyielding but when u get to the story apparently it isnt and it just takes for a call out post to get her to stop lmao

[flockofdoves]

trying to log other food i’ve made this week for future refence for myself too.

made kasha varniskes almost entirely from this recipe (super rare for me to just stick with one recipe lol but it just was better than all the others i saw. one other one i saw called to caramelize onions for 5 minutes lmao)

notes for myself

next time i want to be more efficient with how i render schmaltz when i use it i just barely had enough and i think i couldve had more if i did it differently

accidentally made the kasha slightly too soft probably because i forgot to preheat the oven and so it was just soaking in the stock for a while

used almost a pound of baby bella mushrooms (would love more but literally made this to use up leftover after using only a tiny bit for another recipe), dried porcinis, and also a small bit of dried black trumpet mushrooms i already had around.

used the water from rehydrating the dried mushrooms to reconstitute the condensed mushroom broth i used for the sauce

thickening the mushroom gravy took way shorter than it shouldve but i think thats bc my fucking left front burner is broken and runs wayyy too hot as of this past week with our just replaced stove when the last one of the same model just had that burners glass top shatter for no reason one day. i hate glass top electric stoves and how ppl act like theyre good theyre really not even easier to clean. also just know my apartment got the cheapest stoves possible lmao. idk how much of a difference simmering vs boiling made for flavor and texture tho im curious?

my one problem was there was just sooooooo much kasha to egg noodles/onions/gravy proportionally. i think i assumed the 2 cups of it was dried but it was just way too much (maybe also not helped by looking up how much egg noodles expand in volume with cooking so only cooking 2 cups at first assuming itd be 4 cooked but idt it was and had to make more. so if i made this again id make a lot less kasha and more onions and gravy. maybe the gravy was less that it shouldve been bc how quickly i boiled it down tho idk

onions i just need a bigger saute pan honestly. there were way too many to fit even in batches as they shrunk a bit without ending up just steaming them which made caramelizing them take longer than it probably couldve and i still didnt have quite enough. i had medium onions not small but weighed them to see how many to put in compared to the large in the recipe but still ended up using slighlty less than the smallest amount that could be bc i just didnt have room in the pan :(

good recipe largely! but used so so many pans lol and def a lot easier when other ppl are helping make it bc a lot can be done at the same time

[staysuki]

im writing this review while reading so yes

bruh i didnt know that just sitting there looking good would bring you a scholarship :// maybe thats why my parents had to pay the school fees,,,,,

all the characters here are so lovable wtf 😭😭😭 yEJI IS SUCH A MOOD I LOVE HER SM ,,,, im actly rly curious who new boy is i mean srsly if THE JUYEON is scared of losing against him, just how gorgeous is he????? 2 hwangs and jisung rivalry hmm 👀 nvm seungmin is my 👑 (sry not sry yeji , i still love you) "3rd place gets a thousand dollar cash prize so im in" -> highkey me ,, i would spare the embarrassment id feel for an award that big 👍

I FEEL BAD FOR JISUNG BUT HIM GETTING BULLIED BY LITERALLY EVERYONE IS SO HILARIOUS WTF AHHSAHSHSHSAHASHHAHASHH nvm 2min rivalry is the real one, 2 hwangs vs jisung is so one sided XD and i agree tho, jisung would be the type to make a stan acc dedicated to himself lol i LOVE how minhos captions just says minho 💀 all the phrases are so catchy ,,, how did u even think of this?!?! BRUH CHA FCKING EUNWOOOO???? LMAO GOOD LUCK WINNING AGAINST HIM ,,,, kinda feel bad for him tho ,,, boy getting played by our queen yeji 😔 💔

justice for jisung 😕

2min didnt make it? :( i want to see bad boy seungmin 😠😩 the 2 of them were so confident that theyd win but didnt pass the first round LMAOOOO ,,,, JISUNG AT THE END OF CH 7- IM DYING Y^Y

i still dont know what the poll was for but jisung is bias wrecking me hard, shouldve voted for him 😀👍 yeji opening up at her insecurities made me 😔 💔 eunwoo still deserved better tho Y^Y WHAAAATTT JISUNG X YEJI ???? 🤭🤭🤭 SHOCKED BUT OKAY CUTE HEHE okay jisung yejis the ship but eunwoo ugh still deserves so much so fcking wholesome im srsly crying

i sense drama and im sure af felix would be the cause 👀 i think im getting to see jealous jeongin real soon. they all think hyunjins going to lose, what if he gets the crown???? id want to see their reactions lmao "and not flirt with other people's girlfriends" LMAOOOO and felix's name on jeongins phone XD didnt expect the plot to go this deep,,,, juyeons words at the end were actually inspiring :">

its so beautiful huehue, i thought s2 would be pure crack but you surprised me once again ! im glad it focused more on their relationship in the second half of the story. full of drama but just my cup of tea 😌 i like how yeji and jisung ended together XD the 3rd bonus got me so intrigued, is this what your new hyunjin smau is about? hMMMMM but rest first 😠

- bs

PLS. I DIDN’T EXPECT A TEXT WALL 💀💀💀

jisung being the comedic relief is such a trope i’m addicted to, i have to stop fr 😔💔 but i just love him sm.

AND THE TWITTER CAPTIONS SJWHSJAJS IT LEGIT TOOK ME A WHILE. i had to sit down and be like 🧎‍♀️hmmmm. and yeah, justice for eunwoo, i honestly like how i didn’t make him out to be a fuckboy— wanted to pull on those empathy strings 🙈.

AND YES, thank you 🥺💓. again, i really came into this wanting to focus on the “downs” of a relationship beneath all the “ups”. like, it has the feel of a serious series that has a layered comedy on top of it so that it’ll be easier to stomach for the reader because i myself don’t like writing pure angst.

and i’m sorry to disappoint but the ending is an open-and-shut case 😭. the hyunjin smau is a different plot, i just really wanted to give him a one-off spinoff because why not, give the people what they want. daddy jeongin is my fave character tho 💓.

i didn’t wanna make a hyunjin spinoff because this is already such a good ending, i didn’t wanna make the characters live longer than they already need to, i’d be dragging it by that point. i’m pretty satisfied by this, a bit sad to let them go but overall happy it’s over. 💓💓

thank you for the text wall bub 🙏🧍‍♀️

[the1312daysofchristmas]

You probably already know about this since you’ve been in the FOB fandom longer than me lol and this post is very long but since we were talking about ARTV I found this and I was like ??? Holy shit he’s actually a piece of shit. I used to watch his videos a lot when I was in high school but I stopped bc honestly he’s boring lmao. But I didn’t know he was actively a douchebag too like to sit there and argue with new fans who are also younger teenage girls as a grown ass man… bc they like the new FOB record and you don’t? I truly do not understand?

Also it makes sense Anthony fantano is his idol tho lmfao.

Anyway a better YouTube music critic that makes interesting videos is Todd in the Shadows! I don’t think he really ~gets~ FOB though so you’re not going to get much on that from him lol although iirc he liked Uma Thurman and his review on that was interesting. like when he doesn’t like songs or he’s reviewing songs for an intended audience younger than himself (like he did drivers license recently) he really tries to get on that level as best he can and understand it and doesn’t brush it off as just “teen girl” music or “bad music”. Plus he’s actually funny lol. I feel like a good critic should be someone not necessarily that you agree with on everything - but someone who isn’t so stuffy and reserved and grasping for dear life onto their opinions. They should be someone you could have a conversation with about music rather than argument.

the existence of that post was locked in a recess of my mind because i remember hearing about it but never read it myself (and not long after that i actually took my fall out boy sabbatical. my fobbatical if you will) but hol-ee SHIT. i coulda told ya he was a shit critic coasting on white man medicority and doing his damnedest to be the 21p of music criticism without even a shred of talent any day of the week but jeez. i forgot how BAD he and his girlfriend were and all the shit they were pulling lmao.

ANYWAYS i actually do thoroughly enjoy todd in the shadows! i occasionally disagree with his attempts at reviewing newer stuff but what i like is his ability to empathize and acknowledge he is sorta kinda the old man shaking his fist at a tree rn, which is good!! its necessary to acknowledge when you have biases that cloud your judgement when reviewing music, for example i could never give a prog rock or shoegaze album a fair review because i think those genres suck and are boring. they arent because people like them but thats a gap in my ability to be critical. similarly i cant review rap and hiphop well because im not familiar with the genre and also have auditory processing disorder which makes fast speech fatiguing, and any artist that does long as fuck 8 minute songs is right out for the same reason. if we dont acknowledge what we cant do then we look dumb as hell. like jon from artv.

i actually think anthony fantano has pretty good music reviews its just that its only rap and hip hop reviews with some solid opinions in pop music broadly and he shouldve never breached containment. i have no evidence of this because i refuse to learn anything more about him than i already know but i feel like hes one of those rare sensible white hiphop heads and he really shouldve built himself a niche and stayed in it for the good of humanity.

[ryncorrect]

university!au: day6 sungjin

i’ve abandoned this au for so long istg my life is a mess yall please forgive but anyway im back with my bullshit and ready to spread my cringe-worthy stuff to the world again

name: park sungjin

major: practical music and arts

other activities: leader, guitarist, and vocalist of university band, president of music club, member of cooking club

park sungjin is the embodiment of leadership

i mean he’s the band leader, the club president, also the president of his class since year one, like he’s so trustworthy and responsible, literally nothing can go wrong under his sight

and even when things do go wrong (life is a bitch) he’ll still make sure everyone is fine and having the time of their lives pun intended

anyone who meets sungjin for the first time will probs say he has this tough man aura, cold,,, tsundere-ish idk

but as someone who have known each other for so long, you never understand when anyone says sungjin looks cold

you know damn well the moment sungjin opens his mouth he gonna throw dad jokes with his satoori dialect

dad jokes are fucking funny fight me

you once said sungjin should start his own comedy club

......he’s currently considering it

oh right he also talks about food all. the. time.

he joined cooking club for a reason okay

no, he can’t and doesn’t really cook he’s only there to taste food and people let him there because he’s nice and he knows how to appreciate the cooks

uh we love a man with manners

so, who is sungjin for you exactly?

he lives next door, one year older than you, was a leader even when you were little ayeee childhood friend cliche

can you imagine little sungjin leading his friends in game its so pure brb crying

you told him everything you couldn’t tell ur parents because they were busy, you asked for his advises, he made sure you were safe and happy

you still depend on him even after you two have grown up

you enrolled to the same university, took the same major with him, and even joined the clubs he’s a member of

this isn’t because you’re indecisive, it’s just that you spent so much of your childhood with sungjin that you two became similar to each other, up to your hobbies and interests and even palate lmao

that’s why he loves to eat with you because you two never argue about the menu

the only club you can’t join is the band, and that’s because jae rejected your application

reason: extremely close personal relationship with sungjin, therefore sungjin will take your side if we ever had an argument

you denied that; no, sungjin wont take anyone’s side based on feelings bc he’s a logical person and he always listens carefully to every side of the parties before he makes a decision..... but jae wont listen

brat

"you only rejected me because im a better guitarist”

“lalalalala cant hear you over my authority as the important band member”

“fuck you”

“i don’t accept offers”

anywayssss you did fail to join the band, but you’re friends with them, theyre literally so used to your company that sometimes they forgot youre not actually in the band

you and the guys teamed up for sungjin’s surprise birthday party

the surprise failed because dowoon accidentally added sungjin to the group chat

sungjin being nice and playing along anyway because he didnt want to disappoint you

and then its sungjin’s turn to ask the guys for help for your birthday party

failed again because dowoon AGAIN accidentally invited you, in person, to your own birthday party

dowoon what the heck?????

yeah its all cute and sweet but thats all of your relationship with sungjin, you treat him like a dependable brother and he treats you like his own little sister

thats what you tell to your friends too when they ask if you two are dating

they’re glad thats the case

because they have a crush on sungjin LMAOOOOO PLOT TWIST

they’re hoping they can get to sungjin through you yanno like asking you to send him snacks and letters or to tell him they say hi

you dont mind i mean you know sungjin is one admirable person ofc everyone likes him

sungjin never rejects nor accepts it hes just like “yay snacks!”

“god damn it sungjin just date any of them im tired of being a matchmaker”

“then dont?? literally no one asked you to”

little did you know that sungjin had the same problem

some of his classmates are interested in you but whenever they come to him he just says, “dont ask me i dont know anything and if i do i wont tell you”

this one sandeul guy has started asking you out and stuff

“ehhh youre so nice i’ll think about it!!”

you, immediately texting sungjin: ur friend sandeul ask me out what should i do

sungjin: do you like him tho

you: not really idk him yet

sungjin: just tell him your mom said no

you: damn nice

but this guy is so persistent and you gotta admit hes kinda cute and after a few tries you finally said yes to him

so you two went together and it was pretty fun

sungjin isnt too happy when he hears about it from sandeul

he asked you, “why didnt you tell me first?”

“well i dont think its a big deal. it was just a date anyway”

but you always told him everything

sungjin never speaks about it again

you go on another date with sandeul the week after

you tell sungjin later and he doesnt ask how it went

hes just “oh”

idk he’s kinda distant now, he rarely talks nor replies to your texts

he doesn't visit music club nor cooking club either so you don't see him often

have i told you im uncreative and all my aus are lame???

you think its probably because hes focusing for the finals, but even after it’s over sungjin doesnt really hang out with you or the band anymore like he only comes for practices and leaves right after

weirdly no one says anything about sungjin’s absence

but you cant stay quiet any longer and decide to ask dowoon whats wrong with sungjin

you shouldve known dowoon cant help much

“honestly i dont know either, maybe you should ask wonpil he’s sungjin’s roommate”

“but what if wonpil told sungjin”

“told sungjin what?”

“that i asked about him”

“asked him what?”

“...nevermind”

you asked younghyun

younghyun doesnt help either

“i dont know, just ask him yourself. i thought you were the closest to him??” why you so salty man

okay fine lets ask jae

“i’ll tell you for fifty bucks”

“dude im broke”

“then deal with it yourself”

you had no choice but to ask wonpil

“he’s just tired”

you know wonpil lied but this little shit refuses to tell anything

“please dont force me to answer i will cry really loudly and it’ll be embarrassing for the both of us”

why do you befriend them in the first place smh

oh youre right about wonpil telling sungjin that youre worried, and he does tell him to talk to you if he got something in mind

sungjins hesitant but in the end he only says, “no... its just that i didnt realize until recently that my little sister has grown up a lot”

“dear god wtf you sound like her grandma”

skip the boring part so uh a few more days passed awkwardly between you two and after your failed attempt at asking around you decide to confront sungjin in person

youre in the band practice room, the others are present, sungjin’s about to leave early as usual, and you find yourself jumping up your seat, “whats your problem with me?”

you know sungjin hates confrontation but you cant stand it anymore. you tried giving him time but if theres anything you seem to be more of a stranger to him

“i dont know what i did wrong and i wont know if you dont tell me, so let me know. i’ll listen and i’ll apologize if its my fault, but dont give me silent treatment like this. its so unlikely of you"

you can see sungjin clences his jaw as he replies calmly, "people change"

"you don't change, youre being childish. if you're mad you should talk about it. if you don't want me here you should tell me to go. if you don't like ME dating your friend you should tell me not to!!!"

drama much ryn

"youre your own person and you make your own choice, its your life and i cant keep telling you what to do or what not," and the end part kinda slips, "i don't hate you dating my friend or anyone, okay? im just not used yet to be a second person for you and im afraid youll get hurt"

"youre never?? a second person sungjin where does this idea even come from youre the only one for me i dont want anyone else???"

and suddenly there's a train of awkward coughs and you come back to your senses and you realize you're being watched

jae pretends to make a phone call, "mom pick me up im scared"

lame jae lame

dowoon mumbles, "can we,,, make an exit first before you two declare your undying love bc its privacy yanno"

you feel the heat spreading across your face as you open your mouth the same time as sungjin, both want to deny dowoon, but younghyun beats yall to it, "yeah you two are in love with each other we been know"

you and sungjin stares at each other, confused, "we don't???"

"oh honey,,, my dear,,, ive read enough sappy shit in writing club to see where this is going"

the conversation was cut there and neither of you bring it up again,

because the idea of you loving sungjin or sungjin loving you is so weird that you refuse to think about it, and so is for sungjin

but ever since that, sungjin has drastically come back to normal its almost hilarious, he spends a lot of time hanging out in the music club, practicing with the band, visiting the cooking club, making a joke here and there

sungjin is himself again with you, a caring dependable brother whom you come to whenever you need to talk or just hang out with and he always makes sure he has time for you

sap

you know hes always been like that but why does it feel different now??? the way he smiles or pulls your hand so youre walking on the inner side of the road,,, how he neatly places your spoon and chopsticks on a napkin when you two go out to eat together,,,, why

tender love baby chICKEN TENDER

mydayexol follow me

andddd so one day, someone asked you out. again.

wow ur so popular i cant Relate

you, texting sungjin: sandeuls friend jinyoung something invited me to a party next saturday should i come

sungjin, replying to you: hmm

you: ???

sungjin: i think its up to you

for some reason youre disappointed by his reply,,, but he’s right tho its your call if you wanna go then you go its not about what sungjin says

right?

right???

but suddenly you got another text: but if you ask for my opinion i would say don't go

you: actually i dont want to either lol so what should i say

sungjin: tell him you already have a date

you: nice

sungjin: with me

you: ayyeee

you: wait what

sungjin: i mean its just a suggestion

sungjin: which you can accept

sungin: or reject

for some reason you can imagine sungjin’s cheeky smile through his texts and it makes your inside tingles and you wanna giggle

so yea you thought it was a joke but he actually did take you out for a movie and dinner

it was really nice

so yanno the weird thing is that neither of you ask the other to be “official” but you just. are dating.

ur friends are mad like “bUT YOU SAID YOU TWO WERENT A THING”

“lol sry i changed my mind”

“fuck you”

“no thanks sungjin can do that... bUT DONT TELL SUNGJIN I SAID THAT hes gonna kill me”

“is he ur mom”

“basically yeah”

this sucks real bad but who cares

not me obviously

ill be back soon (or not) with dowoon’s one lets hope i can do better than this dnsjfsndfj lnjajnfdjs lmAO I LOVE YALL AND HAPPY NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE

[shytiff]

May Small Wins

1 - lazed, went to racheel’s place and put my motorbike there, went to slipi jaya with silvi devi reza to watch seobok (it was fun!!), had iftar at the yumz green sedayu. It was raining when we get back. prayed maghrib and isya in some random mosque. went back and arrived at like 8 past sumn. showered, slept like a babyy

2 - lazed, slept and woke up at like 11, went to nila’s house, practiced doing eyeliner by borrowing nila's (focallure brand), iftar at green sedayu foodcourt (originally intended to go to the yumz but it enforces actual distancing) with angkot ppl minus tik will. Arrived home at about 9-ish.

3 - magang as usual. Went to rm. Took mrt to lebak bulus. My inaco salary finally came. My head kinda hurts after tarawih. Ended up skimming over bj alex lmaooo. Did not shower today lol,,,,

4 - added dr dafsah's revision to the excel database otw to rsf. Pak nardi took a while to arrive. Left rsf early to go to the bank. I (((finally))) activated m-banking lmaooo wow the features are neat wow im not jahiliah anymore. Found this method of just let it sweat anyway during tarawih lmaoo. Preferably with long sleeves bcs somehow you feel less of the sweaty feel compared to tshirt.

5 - sampling - data entry - RM as usual. Theres no new RM. Read a goood dramione fic by bex chan even if its not complete, its okay. Im okay :"))). Iftar was soup, salad, chicken katsu and french fries. Its been 2 days that i practiced sleeping-to-rain-sound. The first night was spent as a dreamless quick sleep (its over before you knew it), but tonight i dreamed abt almira's wedding lmaoo.

6 - no sampling today!! Still went to rsf tooo go to the mall w regen lmao. Did some data entry. Went to PP by mrt. Went back by going to halte gbk and thankfully the kalideres one arrived after only waiting for 5 mins. Its surprisingly quick, compared to lebak bulus - pesakih trip. Took abt 20 mins to jelambar.

7 - no sampling today too. Dr vera gave us lebaran cookies! Did gcp for bu suryati a5. Went to rm, finally finished the available rm. Went home early. Can finally relax since its the weekend.

8 - literally laid in bed til my body hurts. Rly want to read sumn but dunno what. Finally decided to read momoiro heaven. And rere hello. And after iftar i read lack of love. And just like tht, my saturday was gone. Cant bring myself to do things

9 - its another day of lazying (or self sabotaging, cant tell). Read spy family and its effin hilarious. Wasted my sunday. Cant bring myself to even move and i just laid in bed all day.

10 - last day of work in the weeekend lmao. Felt better than being in AR, but still not that much productivity. Went to RM. Phone call w fianti along the way to plan food in almira's bridal shower. Went back at 12-ish. Picked up my dress from risma busana. Walked to and fro halte kebon jeruk. Prayed zuhur close to ashar in kfc's mushola. Felt better after ~8k steps. Had homelab's green tea mixed with vsoy. It honestly made me feel better. Matcha, or caffeine, sure is amazing. At least i had a sense of normalcy before losing all the will to self-care

11 - consumed internet entertainment u til i was sick and tired of it. Watched a lot of cut videos. Granny came and stayed over. So i slept upstairs

12 - same as 11 but upstairs. More relatives came near iftar time so i excused myself to shower. Slept in mom n dads room at like 12-ish. Watched hp goblet of fire since keisha and karins newest obsession was draco. We squealed together over liking enemies to lovers trope haha,,,,

13 - Somehow all of dad's jakarta relatives came for lebaran. the last time i checked, there were some bridges being burned. prayed eid at home. watched perempuan tanah jahanam (which was surprisingly not scary). ate. napped. talked about personal things w keisha and karin. i cant believe the time has finally come where we talk about this kinda stuff. watched you’re next (it barely has any plot, just gore). they went back at about 8 pm and i just sleptttt yall lmao i didnt shower today. disgusting, i know

14 - cam barely get out of bed. Managed to shower at zuhur time. Watched dalbang and laughed like crazy bcs its just that funny. Read fanfics. Tiktok. Ate once and had greenfield yogurt at the evening. Fell asleep. Woke up at 1 and snacked on 1 pack of oat krunch

15 - run bts. Originally planned to go to flavola but it was still closed, so i went to dm's dunkin. Ordered orange juice and oeanut choco donut but somehow the price wasnt package price hhh. Turns out my clires account was somehow banned. So i contacted the admin. Instead of doing dr dafsah's excel i ended up taking off the makara sticker from my laptop. Bought some stuff for almira's bridal shower. Bought arirang at hari2 (its funny bcs yesterday i was seeing online marketplace, planning to buy it, but turns out hari2 the magical place had buy 2 get +1 deal for arirang.

16 - run bts. Managed to move my body a bit. Did 20 squats (ill elaborate on this later). That improved my mood. Tidied up some of my stuff. Saw the paper bag of random memorabilias by friends.

17 - went to rsf by tj. left kalideres 06:45 and arrived at RSF 8:15. sampling. went to RM (still no new ones). picked up by mom. went to salemba for almira’s bridal shower. originally planned to get padang at citra minang behind BK but it was closed. so we drove around looking for open ones. ended up buying it in a small (but crowded) padang place near a big padang restaurant lmao. was the first one to arrive at acacia. checked in, pulled the bed near the wall. showered. its hilarious sometimes with a bit more serious discussion anjayy. went home w febby who drove and clara

18 - went to mcd to get lunch (since everyone’s fasting) and tried to muster the will to do something. i didnt manage to do anything except shopping online (brought dusty pink hijab at hijup). got spicy chicken and iced coffee. (spoiler alert: tomorrow i got mencret2 lmaooo). read my suha and beyond the skidipapap its actually rly good

19 - went to RSF (with mom as usual. quickly snapped RM pictures while mom was waiting. went with her to mami’s house bcs she and uwak will fly to banjar. finally got to meet haekal, he’s such a smiley babyy its basically free therapy. planned outing with nisa lmao. from soekarno hatta we went to vintage vibes lmao since we’re already out. vintage vibes is more crowded now. and there’s less good findings now. went back emptyhanded. ate chicken arirang since there’s no food. fell asleep at like 06:30 until early morning lmaooo

20 - woke up at 2-ish am, played my phone, fell asleep at like 9?, woke up again at 11 lmaooo. went to sbux. had matcha latte. did some inaco work. todays the most productive ive been this week.

21 - went to gi with febby to also meet up with fi, bought falsies and glue (later proved to be of a horrible quality), siraman and pengajian almira (first time seeing an actual siraman), went to blok m w nes ren ara gen. Tried naruto takoyaki at little tokyo, went to daitokyo (i didnt eat anything), and got matcha cake, sakura and mango raspberry gelato at kebun ide. Picked up by mom. Renata gifted me bts 2021 winter package photocard 🥺🥺

22 - iluni internship webinar by dr naldo. Grabbed fried chicken master. Stupid time management etcetc made my start makeup at 12 (febby went out at 13:30). My falsies and hijabdo was done by herrr thank god for the help. Went to swissbel. Didnt take a pic w almira bcs time. Almiras wedding at damai indah golf pik. My skin was TERRIBLE at the wedding. The make up didnt stick prolly bcs of vitacid. Thank god for masks,,, went back home w febbyy. Made tiktok lmao

23 - lazed. Went to flavola. Its finally daytime caffeine again w kopsuscok. Did dr triya's translation work and finished it at home. She transferred the fee at like 11pm

24 - off to RSF with mom. no new medical records. wrote fuad’s name on the medrec borrowing form. continued to nisa’s place w mom. lazed, played w haekal, put some patient’s phone number on the inaco excel. Off to GBK with nisa and sarah. parked at abc field (shouldve parked near GBK’s H gate). saw moja museum 2.0, took lots of pics. mo paint (moral lesson: draw the background first!! not the foreground). finished at 16:30. ashar at masjid al-bina. nisa dropped me off at gbk tj station. prayed maghrib on the bus since the traffic was so ughh. met atikah in lippo puri. decided to eat seirockya so we walked to puri. talked about a certain someone along the way. we rly talked about it while walking until we arrived at seirockya. atikah treated me uyeyy since she and racheel will stay in depok for 2 weeks starting tomorrow. got the shoyu ramen and gyoza. took the taxi to atikah’s place. mom’s waiting there lmaoo i was like “noo dont wait at jco, just wait at atikah’s”. still felt energized that night in my bed. no sleepy2. like 100% awake. 

25 - woke up at like 9:30. i basically did nothing today. didnt even shower lmao (i showered last night). read the good teacher in one go. zoom meeting w dr eva. i rly need some structure in life, goshhh

26 - showered and went to mcd. got nasi uduk, breakfast wrap and milo for 26k (thanks mcd app promo and mcd duta garden’s menu machine, i dont have to interact with another human). planning to do dr dafsah’s excel after all the data is complete, and still no new inaco data, so i ended up.... online shopping at bobobobo....... (bought outer and white culotte). tidied up the writings on my stickies (plenty of words has accumulated). ordered onejai for emir juan (expensive!!! 79k no promo lolll but free delivery. i was baited by gojek’s 1k 2 week subscription and felt like hmmm i should get something since we live in the middle of nowhere and free deliveries felt significant at that particular time when im holding my phone lmao). fell asleep after drinking vsoy + matcha lol its soft caffeine no longer works i guess

27 - woke up late as usual, went to sbux at 1 pm. tried white peach matcha frapp. the peach overpowers and u can barely taste the matcha. tried to read something useful (in medicine) but skimmed 2 ppt and then i saw solid’s bitly for isip. finished reading banana fish. couldnt bawl my eyes out because im outside.

28 - checked out rsf. Still no new ones. Immediately went back. Lazed and wasted my time

29 - iluni webinar. Here comes the impending life crisis. Ate nasi uduk and mie goreng telor today. Tried vsoy golden grain with matcha. It has almond aftertaste. Line call with kris for almost 4 hrs until 11 past sumn pm.

30 - more iluni webinar. Dr Eric, SpPD, PhD was rly cool. Tried daily box (butter soy chicken). Quite tasty. Mkg w regen. Videocalled in the mall w silvi racil bcs its ale and nadaa's wedding today. Bought gooma 500ml matcha w gofood pickup discount. Ate sushi go (the shoyu has mirin btw). 50k+ you get 6 piece of sushi (2 salmon) and matcha cake and ocha. Quite a nice deal. Talked abt cryptocurrency lmao. Went back and forth w TJ. All hail tj

31 - planned to do at least some productive stuff at home. turns out nila is outside and had some time to spare. so we went out. i met her in citra 6. we went to pik’s white beach. its scorching hot since its 2 pm. spent like 15 mins there. we had wanted to stop by monsieur spoon but THERES A QUEUEEE even if its a hot afternoon. so we ate tom sushi at green sedayu. talked a bit afterwards in nila’s place and then i was picked up by emir. tried gooma’s matcha. its not sweet like sbux. approved by mom (who doesnt like sweets). but its more expensive than sbux’s 2L 100k promo lol. (45k after gopay pickup promo for 500 ml). reread bj alex lmaooooo found new tidbits

[rebeccacatalinas]

Super just curious, 100% not judging, not trying to debate, really just wanna here your thoughts bc RoyAi thoughts are Good Thoughts and I too don’t think Roy and Riza were Best Friends before Ishval was over: how do you see their relationship having developed in canon??? It’s fun to imagine them being Young and Into Each Other but at the same time they were v formal at the funeral and in Ishval sooooo I often wonder how they *fell* in love (that seems too simple a term for them but anyway...).

MUAHAHA im excited to answer this [and i wanna say someday ill write it out, but lets be real, im mostly a oneshot kinda gal]. and ok it got longer than i intended but i have so much fun writing about them:

heres how i see their relationship in canon [obviously theres some of my own headcanons thrown around in here but im trying to keep it mostly analysis]:

as older teens living together - barely acknowledged one another, didn’t speak often, riza was already pretty reclusive thanks to her father’s neglect and roy was focused entirely on his studies so he could finish his apprenticeship as quickly as possible. a few conversations here and there, but considering she still refers to him as “mr. mustang” i dont think they ever became friends or spend any alone time together outside of a few meals.

tattoo reveal - i dont think there was a big jump in their relationship, it was mostly awkward and full of uncomfortable promises and roy realizing he shouldve noticed her sooner [maybe he couldve stopped this tattoo from happening? roy would definitely blame himself for something like this when he has nothing to do with it lol]. riza trusts him because of his inspiring words + her grief/confusion towards her fathers death [cuz it was probably a weird combo of grief and relief and that made her latch onto roy’s words about ‘saving everyone’ even more]

in ishval - after finding out about each other being in ishval, riza felt betrayed and angry and roy felt even guiltier and dirtier than he already had. and they have a couple of uncomfortable bonding moments ‘cause roy feels responsible for her being out there [tho riza didnt join the military for him, it WAS his words that inspired her to enlist]. i dont think they had the opportunity to spend much time together in ishval, tho riza was one of three amestrian women to appear in the ENTIRE ishval volume so i think hed be constantly worried about her [for good reason].

back burning - [this is the most complicated time for me to think about LMAO ive read like 600 fics and thought about every possible version i can for this…scene. and nothing feels completely right. i just wanna know the details of what they did, arakawa. i gotta KNOW.] i imagine it was an intensely emotional situation, guilt heightened by their recent ptsd and the way roy talked about how familiar he is with burning flesh and to what degree he can harm someone…he tried to look at it objectively and pretend not to be fucked up by the situation, and im sure he could just combine burning riza with all the other people he’d burned and let it pile onto his guilt. so theres still no love, just guilt and responsibility and pain. likewise for riza, she feels lots of guilt and responsibility and pain. LOTS of pain. i think during this time/afterwards is when roy shares his ambitions with her and his desire to change things in the military and she can fully understand how much he wishes he could undo what he did.

“be my assistant” - sttiiilllll, i dont see any love in this decision. its all based on responsibility and guilt which is the core of their bond which is so sad and fucked up. he wants to give her the opportunity to take back what he took from her, in a sense. to fix what he broke. tho there wasnt anything romantic behind it necessarily [tho i imagine by this point in their lives, grumman and hughes and christmas have already started shipping them lmao], making her his assistant and giving her permission to kill him was tying their fates together forever and they were both totally aware of that and, like, its INTENSE. its like a marriage proposal but worse and more dramatic.

love???? - so when/how did they fall in love??? id say…..very gradually over the course of their time working together. lots of late nights and close encounters and accidental touching and comments from friends and family combined with a lack of legitimate dating and the fact that they planned on working together for as long as possible…i love the idea of roy having a flick switch in his brain one day and he realizes hes been in love with her for a long time, whereas riza’s admiration for him just grows to the point where her heart feels full when theyre together and maybe she doesnt immediately realize that its love [i dont see riza as someone who spent a lot of time thinking about romance] so its fun to imagine that she really just didnt realize what she was feeling. BUT I DIGRESS, thats all headcanon, i just see it being a nice slow burn between “id like to make you my assistant” and when they first appeared in the manga. a beautiful slow burn that ive read hundreds of fics for and they all get my heart flutterin’

so this turned into a much longer thing than i realized. i stand by everything here as headcanon but i feel pretty strongly about most of it, i llloooovveee roy and riza’s relationship so much lmao.

[nightandstarlight]

Demeter, Apollo, Ares, Centaur, Siren, Nymph, Agamemnon, Jason, Sun Chariot, Caduceus, Aegis, Golden Fleece, Olympus, Tartarus, Elysium, Ogygia, The Labyrinth? :3c

Asdfghjkdhslñ so many omfg why iLY ((I have to say tho i didnt really think about having to answer more than one of these at a time before i rbed the qs and since im on mobile and theres no way im gonna remember all of them im probsbly gonna do one first and then like edit this post to add the rest or something so it might take a while))

‡Demeter: do you have any pets?

>Unfortunately i dont my dad never wanted us to have any :// last time i had an actual pet living in my house i think it was when i was like 10 y/o or so and they were a couple of turtles who used to escape all the goddamn time like we would literally find them on the street trying to get away from our house even tho we had a enormous backyard and we treated them as well as we possibly could?? idk they prolly hated us so my parents mightve given them away i dont even remember,,, and thenn like two years ago i think i got a pet sheep called peter.. Peter the sheep was only around for a week tho and he wasnt even officially my pet but i loved him as if he were i still miss him and think about him often.. basically that summer when we went to visit my dads brother in misiones we took him with us from my dads farm ? (not really my dads farm but i dont wanna get too sidetracked here lmao) to my uncles farm for breeding or whatever so it was a solid 6-7 drive with him in the bed of our truck and me just starting at him and trying to get attention goD i never thought id care about a sheep that much anyway once we got to misiones we couldnt take him straight away to my uncles farm for whatever logistics reason i never asked about because all it meant was that he would have to stay in my uncles backyard for a couple of days and i would get to spend more time with him !! so thats what happened !! I took tons of pics and recorded him doing nothing and loved him from afar and then i was there when we dropped him off at my uncles farm.. and then i never saw him again.. the saddest part is that weeks later when we were all back home my uncled called my dad to let him know that Peter wasnt even fit for breeding bc rumour has it he had a third testicule lmao so he was technically useless rip peter the sheep ,,, aaaand now that i live alone i really wanna get like a cat or something but i never learned how to take care of anything so im scared i wont know how to if i have to do it all by myself

if i could add tags to this on mobile id apologize for talking so much about peter instead of just answering the question but i cant soz

‡Apollo: What kind of music are you into?

>alt/pop/rock/indie/pop punk,, i dont really like defining it by genres because who knows for sure what do they even mean anymore but the second best way i have to describe my music taste is ~basic white girl who thinks shes special~ and that makes me feel even weirder,, if you want i could try to make a playlist once im back in my apartment like next week or so lmk

‡Ares: whats a big pet peeve of yours?

>probably when people dont listen,, (u mean deaf people?? thats pretty fucked up dude) no lmao i mean people who pretend to listen but dont care about what you have to say or even worse when theyre so self absorbed that they dont even try to act like theyre paying attention and just straight up talk on top of you or interrup you constantly and not even bc they have something important to say but just because they can like whyy ohh or even worse when they do all that and then have the nerve get angry/offended if you dont pay enough attention to them??? Boyyy oh boy i hate that but i *cough love my parents i love themm

‡Centaur: Last book you read?

>all the bright places by jennifer niven,, didnt actually read it but i listened to the audiobook a week ago so i think that counts,, and if audiobooks dont count i read Evenfall by Santino Hassel back in march

‡Siren: Last song you listened to?

>((when i answered this (at 3:30am) i wasnt listening to anything but)) spotify says it was devil in me by halsey,, rn (13:40) im listening to alone by halsey

‡Nymph: Last dream you remember?

>i cant remember any recent ones atm but a couple of weeks ago i dreamt i was dating veronica from riverdale?? I probably posted something on here about that and it was so sweeett other than that idk maybe something about my classmates i see some of them pretty often in my dreams and theyre usually really nice cause i almost never remember any bad dreams/nightmares

‡Agamemnon: whats an achievement that youre proud of?

>i cant think of anything rn maybe getting into uni or coming out to my mom

‡Jason: have you ever travelled abroad?

>nope,, the closest i was to leaving the country was in 2014 when i was gonna go with my english teacher and class to nyc i got my papers and everything ready but then everyone started to come up with reasons why they couldnt go so i was gonna have to go completly alone/with friends of my teacher and their students which i didnt know at all so i got scared and decided not to 3 i know (hope) i’ll get another chance to go tho

‡Sun Chariot: whats your favorite mythological creature

>umm maybe sirens or gorgons im not 100%sure

‡Caduceus: whats your favorite color

>too many for different purposes but mostly purple?

‡Aegis: whats your favorite book or series?

>all for the game by nora sakavic atm

‡Golden Fleece: whats your favorite animal?

>ive loved dolphins since i was a kid but felines are too perfect in too many ways they make me weak at the knees

‡Olympus: describe your dream job

>so i know id looove to have an office job really stable and monotonous and everything like translating books but i also know that im terrified of getting stuck? And i feel like a job like that doesnt really leave much room to grow professionally so even if at the time im happy with just doing that the idea of looking back one day and realizing i sat at a desk and did the same thing for 20 years is not the best (which is ironic bc im wasting my youth ™ doing exsclty that for free basically but yea idk ) Dream job as in actually ~dream~ job would have to be like whatever people did on that show extreme makeover home edition?? I used to be obsessed with that show when i was a kid and i still think its a great idea even if its not as extra and over the top like that was id love to help people that way i could also make this longer but its lowkey too personal

‡Tartarus: Whats a short term goal you hope to achieve?

>going back to therapy and not quitting this time? making friends? Id say improving myself as a person but i feel like thats more of a long term goal but not hating myself rn would be nice,, also something tangible would have to be passing my calc II final that i shouldve taken a year ago and didnt cause i got scared + too depressed to study properly lmaao

‡Elysium: if you could have a superpower, what would it be?

>telekinesis and or being able to teletransport sounds cool

‡Ogygia: describe your dream husband/wife/life partner?

>patient, better at comunication than i am, respectful but that should be obvious, loves puns and bad/dad jokes, loves me? Also loves kids and is okay with adopting cause i definitely wanna adopt childrepn someday

‡The Labyrinth: have you ever died and came back as a vampire?

>not sure if im allowed to talk about this but i bet no one is gonna read all this cause its wayy too long lmao also i dont care anyway so yes, yes i have

half a day later im done!!! i know its a lot I hope its not too boring tho lmao