#this started as a broad topic and suddenly became really specific... whoops

[babygirlthor]

i think i joined this fandom at literally the worst possible time.

this post has been a long time coming but i am currently irritated enough to actually post it so here we go

(under the cut because this just got WAY too long)

personally i'm here for the art, the angsty headcanons, the jokes and fic recs... but the negativity continues to run rampant. i want to see different ideas and interpretations but... it's like there isnt even room for that anymore.

being in fandom has always been a very strange experience for me because i don’t enjoy conflict. i don't mind that other people like it, but for me, it makes me feel sick to my stomach and if i can't fix it i have to avoid it. there always seems to be parts of fandom that love to argue, but it's usually not too difficult to sort through it all and find some people i enjoy interacting with. and i'd just find my little corner and stick to that. but lately... that doesn't seem possible.

and the few of the more chill areas of the fandom (that i've come across) revolve around shipping. which still has the usual discourse, don't get me wrong, but they also seem to stay in their pockets of people and ignore most of the other kinds of drama.

unfortunately for me, i dont have the desire to interact with shipping most of the time. so i'm stuck in this weird limbo that... is too long of a detour for this post so i'll leave it at that.

at this point i see so many conversations, even light hearted meta posts quickly turn to arguments. actual conversations and discussions are a rarity. people spend more time making fun of each other than actually discussing the material. the different 'sides' of the fandom seem to get further and further away and it seems like sharing a differing opinion is impossible. I know plenty of people love to argue but like.... first of all- okay, I really don’t care (tbch I didn’t even finish watching the show because it wasn't my thing) and i dont care to see it.

personally I think some of the concepts from the show are neat- even though i don't have a desire to finish watching it at this time- and applied to fic could be fun. but even that has become such a divisive topic.

putting that aside, I get that people are upset about the show. but sometimes i see posts from both so-called 'anti' and 'positive' sides of the fandom mocking each other. and at this point? what is this achieving?

~and there's just too much to rant about in one post so i'll just zero in on one very specific type of post that is currently bothering me~

i really hate to see people making fun of each other, especially behind their backs. (i want to point out: there's a huge different between 'this hc makes no sense and here's why i think it's wrong' and 'wow look at what these idiots think'. i'm not talking about the first one or general discourse rn, which is a whole other topic)

if one feels the need to repost something because they know OP wouldn't want to see it on their post... shouldn't that make one stop and think for a moment? there's zero constructive purpose for mocking someone, especially on a public platform where they could see it.

vagueposting doesn't always bother me, but sometimes i think... if you're really dying to talk about this, wouldn't it be more fitting as a private conversation?

and every time a post like that come across my dash, it makes me angry and uncomfortable and it's not even about *me* or something i relate to. why does one feel the need to do that? why do i have to see posts like this every week? and why is it encouraged and perpetuated as so many chime in with agreements? i guess it might feel cathartic in the moment, but is it really going to make anyone feel better? is it really worth it to push someone else down just for a few seconds of amusement?

and if something upsets you i get making your own meta (or rant) post about it. there's plenty of hc that upset me as well. but again, there is a HUGE difference from that and making a post, not about the actual topic and hoping for a discussion, but purely with the intent to mock someone.

and you know the worst part? a lot of the ones i see making these posts are the same people that complained about 'toxic positivity' fans mocking the fans that didn't like the show. and now they're turning around and acting the exact same way.

this is just my viewpoint and i don't expect anyone to agree with me on any of these points. and maybe there's some nuance to these posts i'm missing out on or i'm making this into a bigger deal than it is, but at this point intent is pretty much irrelevant (for me) because this continues to taint my experiences with the fandom.