#this is a slightly more conceptual post than usual
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"Thousands of prehistoric graves exist in vast cemeteries throughout Bosnia and the Herzegovina—similar ones are found in Servia, Montenegro, and High Albania. They yield many bronze and iron objects of the highest interest, for the patterns are still worn, or have been till recently, by the peasants of Bosnia, Servia, Albania, even of Bulgaria. The rayed ball or circle is not only a common pattern in silver, but is also a traditional tattoo pattern (see illustration)."
High Albania by Edith Durham
Top: Pair of earrings with a green stone in the centre and small balls arranged around it in a star pattern. Pitt Rivers Museum. Sarajevo, Bosnia. Collected in c. 1906 by Edith Durham.
Middle: (1) Silver gilt earring decorated with coral beads. V&A Museum. Bulgaria. Made in c. 1850 and acquired in 1872 at the International Exhibition in London.
(2) Silver earring shaped like a half wheel with beads on the ends of the spokes. V&A Museum. Jerusalem. Made in c. 1850-1870 and acquired for the Museum in Jerusalem in 1873. "The design is more typical of the kind of earring worn in the Balkans, particularly in Bulgaria, than those from the Syrian region. It is possible that it was an import, brought by a pilgrim to the Holy City, but it is equally likely to have been made locally."
Bottom: Illustration from High Albania by Edith Durham, 1909.
1. Prehistoric Bronze Ornament, Bosnia (Sarajevo Museum, Sjeversko, T. 2).
2. Modern Silver Earring, of type common to Bosnia, Servia, Bulgaria, and Kosovo Vilayet.
3, 4, 5, 6. Common Catholic Bosnian Tattoos.
#bulgaria#bosnia#albania#Jewellery#high albania#edith durham#victoria and albert museum#pitt rivers museum#this is a slightly more conceptual post than usual#but i kept seeing these earrings#and i opened high albania and there was the illustration
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Good Neighbour
group : ateez
pairing : nerd!seonghwa × neighbour!reader
genre : smut, neighbours au
word count : 3.8 k
warning : smut, mdni, explicit sex (piv), mentions of watersports (no actual action), seonghwa mentioning he watches porn, unprotected sex, mentions of Seonghwa pleasuring himself to the thought of (y/n), (y/n)'s kind of a brat ??
a/n : happy seonghwa day !!! :D though i'm in singapore, i still want to post this and i did it !!! >:)
buy me coffee ?
Frantic knocks on Seonghwa's door made him almost smash his lego Death Star by accident. Thankfully, he only smacked his hand on the side of his table. Though painful, he'd have that over ruining the thing he had been working on for the whole day and was three-fourths way done.
The knocks on the door became relentless and bordering on incessant and honestly, it annoyed him quite a lot. He was hoping to have a quiet night in after hearing (and dealing) with the excitement around the apartment earlier. Plus, he promised his friend, San that the next time they hang out he would show him his finished lego Death Star so he could help conceptualize how to put them on display. So obviously, Seonghwa wanted to spend the day for himself, for his hobbies. It wasn't like Seonghwa would usually spend his time out, it was just that his time alone was usually spent on his work as a remote working cyber security expert. They truly benefit from Seonghwa's anxiety and tedious working tendencies but Seonghwa couldn't really complain.
When Seonghwa (finally) opened the door, he was so ready to scold whoever was on the other side, pissed that they annoyed him for no reason. But when he was met with the face of his crush, teary-eyed with her arms hugging her body tightly with a slight tremble, his anger melted away and his shoulders dropped. "(y/n)?" he called out, crouching down slightly to your height to be eye-level with you, "Are you okay? What's wrong? Have you been crying?" he asked, a worried look clear on his face. You had been the object of his affection for quite some times now and when he heard that your house had been burgled while you were at work, Seonghwa felt the most guilty because it was during the time he decided to go out and buy a new lego set for his collection. Had he waited to go a little longer, he would've been able to stop the burglary. Of course by calling someone, what can a nerd like him do? Offer to get pantsed as an exchange? That wouldn't be enough and he had a feeling that he would just make the situation worse. Considering that he only had a handful of experience with having a full conversation with you and every single time, he was so awkward. One time, he managed to spill his own coffee on himself, jumped and bumped his head to the wall behind him. You were nice enough to not make fun of him and even staying with him and iced his head. From then on he was down bad and he swore that he will try to be better for you. That was a year ago so please make your own conclusion.
You were sniffling and your eyes were shifting around warily, arms hugging your own body as a gesture of self preservation and comfort after experiencing a major trauma. "Can I stay here with you for a bit? I- I don't feel safe at home and none of my other friends are available," you sniffled sadly. Seonghwa couldn't help but skip a heartbeat at your words, focusing on the fact that you had indirectly called him your friend. While he would like to be more, he was more than happy that you thought so highly of him and he can only hope that when he finally make his move (whenever that is), his happiness would be tenfold. Whilst trying to suppress the grin that was threatening to split his face in half, Seonghwa frantically nodded and stepped aside, "Of course, you can stay here as long as you want! With me, your friend!" it took everything in him to not laugh or giggle considering that the situation was still sensitive. Thankfully, you didn't seem to realize his attempts of not being a weirdo and you even stepped close to him to gave him a tight hug. "Thank you for being such a good friend, Seonghwa, I'm really glad to have you," your voice was mumbled due to your pressing your face on his shoulders. Seonghwa's body froze especially when you exhaled deeply into his clothes, turning a spot very warm. For some reason, feeling your breath on him was exhilarating and had you not let go of him, you would've definitely felt his boner on your hip.
Even when you were already inside his place, you were still stiff and awkward. The situation was just so stressful to you that even with the company you knew you needed, you were still not able to feel comfortable yet. Seeing this of course upset Seonghwa as he adored your happy and cheerful side. "H-hey, do you want something to drink? My friend, Yunho, got me this pink wine thing and I've been waiting for the right reason to-" "Yes please," you cut him off, both surprising and delighting him with your enthusiasm over alcohol.
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Not even half an hour later, you and Seonghwa found yourselves giggling over random things on his couch. You had let loose a little (a lot) with the help of the alcohol and Seonghwa's dumb attempt at imitating his friend Wooyoung's witch laugh. You've been laughing for a solid 5 straight minutes and Seonghwa was beyond proud that he was able to make you that happy and distracted. Or distractedly happy.
"Seonghwa, stop it or I'll pee myself!" you whined whilst still laughing happily, head thrown back and hand on your stomach when you felt like it was starting to cramp. Grinning widely, Seonghwa sat himself back down on the couch, this time unknowingly closer to you with a slight huff and reddened cheeks, courtesy of the alcohol. "If you pee yourself, I know that means you were genuinely laughing so hard and I'll take pride in that," he said, wiggling his eyebrows teasingly. Without Seonghwa realizing, the alcohol had allowed him to be more confident in having you in his apartment whilst simultaneously giving him a bit more courage to be able to communicate with women easier. Usually, he'd stumble over his own words and/or mix them up to create a confusing, awkward word. In return to his statement, you raised an eyebrow at him as a knowing smirk appeared on your face, "You like girls peeing because of you? Kinky," and Seonghwa almost choked on his own spit. Seeing this, you decided to egg him more, "I'm not kink shaming you, Hwa, I'm just surprised you're into that." Seonghwa began sputtering random words, trying to reject the notion but no actual, comprehensible words came out of his mouth and it made him panic because he felt like as if he was trying to hide something when it wasn't the case whatsoever.
The panicked look on Seonghwa's face; the blush, the twitchy eyes, and the trembling bottom lip looked cute to you. You have always thought that he was attractive, hot even, he was just a nerd who gets overly excited over things that he likes and most of the things he like revolves around Star Wars, Marvel, and pink stuffs. Plus, his career path on top of the way he dressed didn't help his case of being a total nerd. You remembered thinking he was so hot when you saw him coming back from playing tennis with his friend Hongjoong and to say your panties suddenly got damp would be the understatement of the year. You've been waiting to be able to see that Seonghwa again and so far you had no luck. Yet.
"I haven't had sex in a year!" He suddenly blurted out without realizing what he had said.
You both sat there frozen; Seonghwa in dreadful realization of the information that he had just unknowingly willingly gave out to you. He remembered Wooyoung and Mingi trolling him about the fact because according to them, it was ridiculous that Seonghwa didn't care much about where or how his sexual frustration was channeled, completely oblivious (or maybe forgetting) that Seonghwa has been pining over you for the longest time. That, and Seonghwa is a very busy smart man with a hobby.
It wasn't like he thought that you would ridicule him, it was just embarrassing to have your crush know you haven't had sex in so long What if he thought he's unexperienced or just THAT unwanted?
"B-but it's not like I have a low sex drive or anything. I get turned on! I really do, I watch porn like a normal person!"
God, if only a meteor could strike him then and there.
Seonghwa was so close to faking an injury or just climbing out the window to escape the awkwardness he had accidentally created. Anything to not be in that position or be that person anymore.
"What kind of porn do you usually watch?"
He was not expecting that question from you.
For a second, Seonghwa thought you were joking. Maybe even making fun of him. Or egging him to spill his kinks or sexual interests just so you could humiliate him later. But the more he looked at you, the more he saw that you were being genuinely curious, there was no malice behind your eyes or gesture. "I... It... It differs from time to time," he was not quite sure why he even responded to you in the first place. Perhaps the alcohol was more potent than he expected it to be. "Oh? So you like dominating and being dominated?" Seonghwa nearly jumped from his seat when your knee touched his, surprised that you were suddenly so close to him. But he didn't move back, he even scooted in, leaning into your warmth and touch that he craved more of after having a taste. "No... Well," though it felt as if there was as lump in his throat, Seonghwa simply coughed it out a couple of times before continuing talking, "I don't quite know about that, but I know I like taking care of my partner."
His eyes widened when you suddenly plopped onto his lap, legs, encasing his thighs as to not let him move around easily. "Tell me more," you said as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, resting your weight on him completely. Seonghwa's head began to swirl, your scent hitting his nostrils and the realization of how close you both were with each other were intoxicating to him, exhilarating even. His hands automatically moved to be placed on your hips, as if wanting to keep you in the spot as a possessive gesture. "Well, I... I'm very nervous having you here with me right now," he blurted out. You couldn't help but giggle at his confession as you didn't expect him to say something like that to you, it wasn't even the context of the conversation. "Why so? It's not like I'm gonna bite you," then you suddenly leaned in, lips next to his ear and your breath hitting the skin making it warm, "Unless you're into that."
In a blink of an eye, Seonghwa had lunged at you, pining you onto the couch as he whined pathetically. "Please don't tease me like this, I don't want to take advantage of you considering you had just been through something absolutely traumatic and not to mention we were drinking," as he pleaded, his palms balled into fists on either sides of your head as if to ground himself, reminding himself that while he couldn't control his words, he should at least be able to control his urges. Seeing him hold back made you pout, obvious that it was not the reaction that you were hoping for. "Oh come on, Seonghwa! I've been through something absolutely traumatic today so I need you right now, I need your help to make me forget how crappy today has been," your words were so clever and you even bat your eyelashes at him to soften him up which annoyingly enough worked. But still, even if you did have a point, Seonghwa was still hesitant because like he said, he really do enjoy (so far, only the idea of) taking care of his partners and ensuring their consent was one of the ways he liked to do it. Besides, to him, asking for permission to commit a very intimate act was hot, it was as if the decision of having sex could be dependent on one of either parties.
Since this was you, someone who he had been pining for for so long, he decided to make sure of some things as to not let the chance pass by just like that. "How drunk are you exactly?" Seonghwa asked, genuinely hoping that you would still be able to do what he hoped you both would do if the chance comes. "Not drunk at all, just a slight buzz, you?" you asked back, heart beating slightly at the thought of Seonghwa wanting to have sex with you. "Drunk enough to have the courage to propose this to you but not so drunk that it would nullify my consent," he said firmly.
Without wasting more time, you smashed your lips agains this in a frenzied rush. Though you leapt forward, your body dragged him down with you onto the couch due to the gravity and your arms being securely wrapped around his neck. When you both landed, Seonghwa let out a yelp and had his clumsiness kicked in, he would have definitely smushed you under his weight on the couch but he managed to support his own weigh slightly. You loved the feeling of him on top of you though, you loved feeling his mouth on yours. Even from the kiss you could tell that Seonghwa was slightly hesitant, wanting to do something to you (that you have yet to figure out) but he wasn't able to actually reach out for it. Heck, not even to place his hands on your body. Usually, with your previous partners, they would be honking your boobs like a clown horn by now, but Seonghwa was different in a nice and frustrating way. You detached your lips and pouted up at him, showing your displeasure over his treatment, "God, Seonghwa just do whatever the fuck you want with me!" you whined, yanking his collars open to began sucking red marks on his pretty, fair skin, "I want to be taken care of by you. You'd like that, right? You liked knowing that you can take care of me and my needs with no problem and have me however you want."
A guttural growl left Seonghwa's lips and before you know it, Seonghwa had flipped you over so that your chest was against the cushion underneath you. It felt like your breath was knocked out of your lungs from being surprised by the sudden action and by Seonghwa's strength. At least you got another glimpse of your nerdy neighbour's athletic prowess and this time you got to experience what he was capable of first hand.
"You want me to take care of you? You want me to explore what I can do from my extensive research?" the sudden appearance of Seonghwa's low voice vibrating through the air caused electricity to shot down your spine, making it feel tingly. "Yes, please, I want to know what you're capable of, Seonghwa, please," you whined breathily, almost sounding pathetic.
Your permission was all Seonghwa needed to grab you by the waistband of your pants and pulled them down along with your underwear. It felt ridiculous that Seonghwa felt a sudden overwhelming sense of arousal just from seeing your bare ass on display for him, It wan't like he had never seen a naked ass before. For sure, he wasn't a virgin and by God, the amount of times Wooyoung and San pranked him by having their bare asses in front of his face just before he opened his eyes was astronomically embarrassing. Though he can't complain much because this was your ass and the sudden rush of adrenaline and excitement that coursed through this body made him think of the endless possibilities be it from potential kinks to positions and even frequency and volume (amount and sound). This must be how virgins on their wedding nights feel. Seonghwa couldn't help but palmed himself through the layers of clothing he had on as he slowly unbuttoned his pants, nose scrunching at the
"Don't just stare at me, do something!" you demanded, "What? You don't know what to do?" Teasing him might have been a mistake on your part because the next thing you know, Seonghwa slapped your ass harshly. Maybe he was acting out from his reflex, maybe something inside him was switched on because when he heard you yelp, he snapped out of whatever it was that made him hurt your ass and winced, momentarily turning back into the bumbling nerd you knew from before. "Oh my God, I'm sorry, (y/n), a- are you okay? I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking," he was cringing so hard when he asked because your now red ass was glaring at him, proving that he was being harsh on you. But he was surprised when you turned around to look at him with your bottom lip between your teeth and a shy smile on your face, "N-no, Seonghwa, that was great."
God, it felt like he finally found the answer he has been looking for.
You were doing nothing but showing him a simple expression but for some reason Seonghwa found it so absolutely sexy. Pornographic even. It released the last hold Seonghwa had in himself and before you could reassure him more, Seonghwa had slipped himself into your cunt. The position you were in at the moment under him with your legs stretched back and Seonghwa's knees trapping your body by your thighs, made you feel even tighter to him. Seonghwa stilled with his eyes rolled back into their sockets as your face fell onto the cushion, the sound of you squealing from surprise muffled slightly but it was still loud enough for Seonghwa to hear. His hands found purchase on your ass, his fingers digging onto the soft flesh hard that you thought indents of his fingerprints could be found later if you look for them. "Shi- shit, Seonghwa! You could've warned me!" you whimpered once you managed to find the strength to lift your head again. "Sorry, (y/n), I- I-" he shuddered when he sunk in deeper, your warm cavern accommodating his dick beyond his imagination, "I couldn't- ah! Help myself, God, you're so f- fucking," it was hard for Seonghwa to speak because he tried pulling away once before pushing back in again and it was addicting. You were in no better shape than him. While Seonghwa's fingers dug into your ass, yours dug into his sofa cushion from pleasure. It wasn't like Seonghwa has a monster cock or anything, but for some reason it just felt right. Having him inside you just felt right to you and you were excited to feel and have more of him.
Luckily, Seonghwa started rocking his hips once the initial overwhelming intoxication ebbed away. Really, it felt like Seonghwa wasn't even moving on his own accord, it was as if something was controlling him but he didn't mind, he didn't care, not when whatever was making him move caused you to bury your face in your arms as you moaned and whined, asking, begging him to fuck you more, fuck you harder. That night, Seonghwa truly felt like his sexual urges was driving him as he suddenly grab you by your hair and pulled you up slightly. "Look," it was then that you realized that there was a window in front of you, "You look so beautifully sinful, how could you do this to me?" he grunted. It was true for one part, because it wasn't just you, it was him too, he looked absolutely delectable. You both looked straight out of a victorian pornographic painting with the warm lighting illuminating your figures and the darkness of the night sky outside the window serving as a blank canvas to accommodate the two of you.
"Shit," you gasped when you saw Seonghwa's eyebrows furrowing from the window, clenching your sopping cunt to trap Seonghwa's cock inside you. The more reaction you gave him, the more frantic Seonghwa's movements become. It was like a very intense tango with both of you giving and taking and teasing each other yet still working together in perfect harmony, synchronizing and complimenting each other like genuine art. Only if art is sweaty, messy, and noisy.
It didn't take long for Seonghwa to feel like he was nearly tipping off the edge of his climax. He was so close he could feel it on the tip of his tongue. Maybe he could thank the nights he spent fantasizing about you, those were his 'practice nights' for this day and it actually surprised him that he didn't immediately nutted inside you upon his entry. Those nights he spent fucking his pillow or humping his bed was nothing compared the feeling of your fluttering walls on his cock and your slick lubricating his movements. "I- I'm close," he huffed, hips hitting your ass sharper than before as his hands became harsher in gripping you, possessively trying to hold you as he had his way with you. "Seonghwa, cum in me," You whined, back arching with a moan following your beg. And so Seonghwa released his cum inside you at the mention of you wanting him there. His hips were stuttering slightly but the feeling of him releasing his cum inside you, having the thought of his cum mixing with your own swirling inside his head as the overstimulation creeped in was addicting. He didn't know how long he was going to cum but it felt endless. You, in the receiving end, couldn't help but tense up when Seonghwa's cum filled you to the brim. The movements he was still giving you made both of your mixed cum spill out and wetting your thighs and the sofa beneath you. The tensing muscles in your cunt, ass, and calf somehow heightened your pleasure and it made you even more aware of the presence of Seonghwa's cock still inside you.
When his movements slowed, Seonghwa's mind wound down and it was then that he realized that he had just had sex with you on his couch. Not only that, he was doing things he had never done before in a sexual way, things he had only seen people do in porn and maybe heard from his friends. He felt his chest bloom with pride but the unsureness of how you feel or how you would react prevented him from smiling out of happiness or even saying something to you.
So when you looked back at him, you had a wide grin on your face, making his heart skip a beat.
"So that's what you're into, huh? What else is on the list?"
Oh he's so fucked. Fucked in the best way.
taglist :
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#cultofdionysusnet#kflixnet#ateez#ateez scenario#ateez scenarios#ateez imagine#ateez imagines#ateez smut#ateez smuts
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I was reading back some posts and checking out your website for RTTS and was reminded that bug ferrets can see in infrared. That made me curious if you have any idea of how being able to see infrared would look? Especially in regards to things that are already colored something in the visible light spectrum like cyan and also emitting heat and thus infrared (if I’m understanding how infrared works correctly)? I’ve been trying to conceptualize it my self and it’s making my brain hurt a little bit 😅
Basically they can see heat gradients. I originally had them detecting infrared radiation specifically but then learned that was... improbable, for physics reasons (IR wavelengths are terribly low energy, meaning any photoreceptor molecule intended to detect it would get a lot of false positives from body heat and other molecular wobbling, also the vast majority of biological compounds are opaque to IR). But seeing heat gradients is essentially the same thing, because things that emit heat usually emit IR. Bug ferrets have the same basic mechanism as the heat pits on snakes, although bug ferret heat pit eyes are slightly more sophisticated at focusing and directing their vision. I have scribbles of them but no proper art yet. Extremely hot or humid conditions also essentially blind their heat eyes, because they cannot pant effectively enough to cool the membrane and get an accurate image of the local heat gradients.
As for what heat vision "looks" like, it would essentially be the same as black and white vision, but the "hot white" is categorized as a separate "color" in the brain; different than red, green, and their combinations (the colors of the visible light that bug ferrets can see with their larger eyes). Something could be simultaneously "cold black" and white, like ice; or "hot white" and black, like heated cast iron. Maybe a way to think about it from a human perspective is the visual experience of chimerical colors.
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I haven't done one of these in forever! I think the last one I did was... four years ago? I thought it would be fun to make one again with my improved art skills and show the work that was put into this piece.
The final piece was one of three idea prompts I submitted for the zine. I was already sketching out thumbnails while I was waiting for approval, but I did draw for one of the rejected prompts as well. (Unfortunately I don't have access to them at this time but I'll add at a later date).
Once the weapon prompt was approved, I got started on a rough sketch. (The sketches were drawn cleaner than what I would normally do to make sure it was readable haha). The toughest part of the piece was its composition. Scattering the weapons was hard because I needed to make sure everything looked balanced and focus was placed on the master sword.
What ended up working for me was I managed to grab as many weapon models from the game as I could find, threw them into Blender, and arranged them until it looked good. A bonus of doing this was having good references for both the piece and the individual weapons themselves (which came in handy when I had to draw some of the detailing). The models were also size accurate so that helped a ton too. I did have to upscale the smaller weapons so they'd be more visible on the cover.
Some of the weapon placement was deliberate, others were put there to fill in space or for another reason. The majority of the characters wielded some variation of a sword so I sprinkled in different weapons and other things to break up the repetition. That includes stuff like the Fierce Deity Mask and Toon Zelda's helmet. The more sillier weapons like Tingle's balloon and King Daphnes' sail were placed in the back so they wouldn't clash too much with the other weapons.
I'll talk about some of the more of the symbolic stuff further down the post.
I also drew an alternative version of this piece with Link being in the center instead of the master sword.
Fun fact: at one point I did consider including Ganon since he's technically playable, but realized he doesn't have a weapon. This would have meant I would also had to include the big Cucco from the cucco mode so neither were ever conceptualized.
I intentionally left the art's tone ambiguous just in case the mod team had something in mind. I did picture it having a dawn color scheme though, and the mods wanted the cover to have a peaceful/hopeful vibe so that worked out. I did however add some sunset choices in my color concepts for more options. The four I made also had sepia versions to fit with the aesthetics of the game.
8 was the one the mods chose. However, I did end up slightly adding 6's colors into it to make the sky pop. This ended up being the finalized color concept.
(It looks a little fuzzy because I ended up layering 8 and 6 on top of each other and I didn't position them correctly fghj).
When I do illustrations I start with the background first so I can use its colors for the foreground and midground. I normally don't draw clouds this big and up close so I had to be pretty delicate with how I rendered it. I'm glad I only had to do one side and just duplicate it to the other. Also I made the oranges in the sky and clouds subdued.
After the background was done, I tried rendering the ground and it was a disaster. This was early on in the rendering phase, but what was meant to be dirt started to look like sand. I tried to see if adding textures would help but it made the problem worse. I ended up taking a break from the ground and moved on to the weapons.
Next was the most grueling part of the piece: linearting. I am not kidding when I say doing the lineart took three whole days. I was also juggling with my other illustration I was working on for the zine so the timeline ended up stretching to a week. I'm a detail-oriented person and stuff like this isn't usually that bad for me but this one was pretty rough. The sweat and tears paid off, I think!
After lineart was done, I went back to render the ground again. It was becoming more polished and included more small rock formations, but the dirt-looking-like-sand bit wasn't improved. I opted to add grass instead since that would be easier to render. That was probably the right call because I think that helped with the desired tone for the cover.
I flipped-flopped between working on the grass and the weapons. This screenshot was when I had added the shading, textures, and some highlights. Oh, and I slightly tweaked the sky a bit.
With the grass and rendering done comes my favorite part: color editing. Started throwing overlays, soft lights, what have you on everything and used color balance to level out the colors. Also added light reflection on the ground for some of the weapons.
Something was missing from the illustration and I had no idea what it was. A friend had suggested particle effects and that did the trick! Everything was set and done and I submitted my illustration. When I saw the cover with the title for the first time, I noticed that the illustration was made a bit brighter than what I originally had (likely so the title stuck out better). I actually really liked that change and edited my own copy of my illustration accordingly.
With that said, now I want to talk about some of the more subtle details in this piece. You guys probably noticed these already, but I want to talk about them anyway! I mentioned deliberate weapon placements some ways up so let me go over that first.
Ghirahim's sword, Zelda's rapier, and the master sword are placed in sort of a triangular way meant to represent the triforce (although I think I messed up on the distance between them). I originally wanted Ganondorf's swords being in Ghirahim's spot but I was worried about contrast issues with the swords' darker color scheme and battling attention away from the master sword. I think the idea still works considering Ghirahim is Demise's sword (and Demise is like the Ganondorf of that game). Though Ganondorf's current placement can be viewed as him being a looming threat, for Hyrule Warriors and other Zelda titles.
I have Lana's tome and Cia's scepter close together to symbolize them being two sides of the same coin. Toon Link and Toon Zelda's were placed on opposite sides of the piece but slightly facing each other. Toon Link's and Tetra's are also diagonal from each other, both also representing a type of connection to each other. It's a similar deal with both forms of Midna's weapons as well as Yuga and Ravio. Speaking of Ravio, his weapon is the only one partially buried, sort of peaking over at the master sword to reflect his cowardice natureand being Link's Lorule opposite (at least the Link from a Linked Between Worlds). A similar idea with Fi is that she is somewhat of a silhouette behind the master sword to reflect her growth in Skyward Sword. (I know technically Fi is represented twice here, but her "weapon" in Hyrule Warriors is a different blade so that's why).
Like I said before not all weapons have symbolic placements like this, but a number of them do.
One more weapon detail I wanted to point out is on the master sword. I had this planned from the very beginning but I intentionally draped Link's scarf over the master sword so that the triforce of courage on the blade is the only one visible. I also intentionally highlighted the engraving to make it more prominent.
In the background, the sky is shaped in a way to resemble the Hyrulean royal crest. With the gap in between the clouds looking like the wings, the Master sword acting as the body, and the three visible stars as the triforce (but I messed that up slightly). Only thing I didn't include was the feet of the crest. It's not an exact 1-to-1, but here's an outline for a better visual:
On the topic of stars, there are 29 in total to represent all 29 characters. The brightest star above the master sword is meant to represent Link, but the other 28 are scattered around. Some are more visible than others so it may be hard to spot them all, but they're there.
Saving this last detail because it doesn't really have anything to do with Zelda and more to do with my art. I have always wanted to do this with my work for a while but haven't implemented it until now so I wanted to bring it attention.
From now on, all of my illustrations will have a hidden little angler fish blended into the scenery. I got the inspiration from Adventure Time's snail that appears in almost every episode incorporated somewhere and thought I could do something similar with my art. I'll show you guys where I placed this one, but you'll have to find the next ones on your own.
Not the clearest, but I promise in the future it'll be better drawn (and in case you're wondering, yes there are also little anglerfish in the other zine illustration too!). I just thought this would be a fun way people can interact with my art (and also act as an additional signature).
And that's it! If you have read all of my rambles, thank you!
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Hey there! I hope you’re having a good day. I just saw a post you made about Dream’s type romantically. Thoughts on Calliope and Dream’s relationship specifically? It always stands out to me how though Dream has had a number of lovers throughout the millennia, Calliope is the only one he married. (And of course, Melissanthi Mahut and Tom Sturridge’s blistering chemistry in the show is an additional component for me xD but feel free to respond only based on the comics if you wish!)
Hey, always happy to see your asks in my inbox!
So, first of all; I don’t care what everyone else thinks:
Dream and Calliope are the OTP even though I’m not a shipper. There, I said it, hit me over the head with a hammer, I live well in that tiny little corner of fandom 🤣
Conceptually, they are very, very alike. There is definitely something in there about dreams marrying epic poetry (and eloquence!) that’s just so on the nose.
But I also can’t help thinking: Slight power imbalance maybe, and we also get this more directly via the “all gods get born and die in the Dreaming.” I think often about how this would have played out for them once Calliope’s last worshippers have died—it’s certainly a tough one, even if their relationship hadn’t soured.
But even so: She is the Muse of Epic Poetry, he is the Prince of Stories, so there is A LOT of overlap between what they stand for. And hence, a lot of mutual understanding. They always struck me as *getting* each other (probably why they fell in love in the first place)—until they didn’t. The fact they didn’t live together was good for them I think, because thoughts need to be allowed freedom to form and develop. Plus, there’s also a lot to be said for Calliope keeping her independence that way. Not just in terms of personhood, but again if you think of how she was essentially created in, and will return to, the Dreaming. It’s probably wise for her (in conceptual terms) not to hang out there ALL the time?
She seems a lot more grounded in the mortal world than Dream is though. I always thought that was down to the fact that humans know her, as in actively worship her/ask her for inspiration, which must make her much closer in a way? Because bar a few, no one really *knows* Dream exists, although everyone does, if that makes any sense? Mortals know him on a subconscious level (that’s why he’s forever nebulous and *lonely*), but people know Calliope as a deity and seek connection explicitly. I’m not sure what I’m trying to say here, but to me, that was always a reason why, although a goddess, she seemed far less removed from the mortal plight than Dream was (at least when they were still an item—we all know he changed, even if he didn’t admit it [well, he did in the end to Nuala, which is a whole ‘nother topic]).
And when I think about why they didn’t work out, I can only think: “Orpheus”.
I mean yes, she said that they were already starting to drift apart slightly before she was with child, but there was still a lot of love between them even so. I think the death knell was to have a child on these wonky foundations. Why they did, we’ll never know.
Conceptually, there’s again something very deep and painful about dreams and poetry becoming something real. And then, that mortal child becoming immortal (until his father finally intervenes). But Orpheus was still all mortal and human to his core, even when he became immortal for a while, and that was *always* at the base of their rift. But I digress…
Back to why was Orpheus the death of their marriage? Dream’s advice to Orpheus was sound, yet it was unfeeling and lacked empathy. Calliope’s was maybe (?) not as reasonable, but she understood her child because a mother’s love is (usually) unconditional. We all know Dream’s wasn’t for a long time although it should have been.
I think if they’d all sat together as a family, supported their son in his grief in a balanced way, this whole catastrophe could have been avoided (I mean no, not really—it’s a tragedy, “doomed by the narrative” and all that). But all of Dream’s relationships (be that to his son or his lovers) fail because he is unreality (hence he has a hard time when things quite literally get real), and despite *knowing* mortals on a very deep level, I don’t believe he truly *understood* them at this point. But I think Calliope did—maybe due to who she was, maybe just because she actually *allowed* them in? Because Dream never truly did that. And when he finally did and truly understood what unconditional love actually means, he came apart at the seams and unravelled.
There’s also something really interesting conceptually in thinking of the Prince of Stories who doesn’t believe he has his own, and the Muse of Epic Poetry who inspires. Who is trying to control whom in this scenario? It’s mirrored in how they behave when the whole Orpheus tragedy takes off:
Calliope tries to inspire and, dare I say try to control the narrative a bit, and I don’t mean this in a bad way, quite the opposite: She looks for the most favourable outcome for everyone involved, even if it means bending the rules: She tries to convince Dream to put in a good word with Hades and believes he would listen because Gods respect him and, dare I say it, are even a bit scared of him.
Dream is rigid. Which is so mind-bending for someone who is the personification of hopes, wishes and possibility. But he is an immovable object: If he’s right, he’s right. That’s the rules, that’s it. And he won’t bend them, not even for his son. I’m not saying that it’s not understandable from his point of view, because he might know things we don’t (potentially also that although he *could* bend the rules because he has the power to do so, it might have knock-on effects no one else can understand or see—it’s impossible to say), only that they are fundamentally different in their approach although they are *both* about inspiration. And inspiration is so closely related to bringing on change (ouch!).
Part of me wants to say that Calliope uses it to control the narrative while Dream doesn’t, that Calliope believes that we can change our destiny while Dream doesn’t, but that’s also too simple. Because Dream *can* be controlling, but in totally different ways and areas.
I feel like I’m rambling out a lot of unordered thoughts, but I guess what I’m trying to say is that Dream and Calliope were so close because they are so similar in so many ways bar one:
Their understanding how inspiration can be used to bring on change. I would somehow go as far as saying that Calliope understands what it means to have personhood, also for herself, and that’s why she understands it in others (I think this is made *very* clear when Richard Madoc holds her hostage). Dream doesn’t—least not at the point where it would have mattered with regards to their relationship, because I think the fishbowl has changed him in that regard. This is also why he wants to make things right with her I believe. But of course he would never openly admit it (he basically stops himself before blurting it out), simply because it would also mean he’d need to admit it to himself…
With regard to that meta:
I definitely think they were highly romantically attracted, purely down to who/what they are. I can’t say too much about their sexual attraction, but after Calliope’s speech at his wake, it would be somewhat unlikely to assume they weren’t 🙈🤣
Was it unconditional though? No.
Was it pragmatic (that sounds so bad and unfeeling, but it’s not a bad thing, because a certain level of pragmatism is what grounds love in reality and makes it last)? I think they tried. But ultimately, he can never live that way because he is unreality, and I often wonder if they both knew 😭
@two-hands-toward-the-sun ask answered
#the sandman#sandman#dream of the endless#morpheus#sandman meta#calliope sandman#calliope#sandman analysis#sandman character analysis#ask answered#asks always open#orpheus sandman
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MUTUAL'S ASK BOX - Go ahead, put anything.
INLAND EMPIRE [Medium: Success] The ask box is rather quite tempting, inviting you.
CONCEPTUALIZATION [Easy: Success] Like the master of a house, with warm pastries, coffee, and a comfortable chair, set up just for you. You should enjoy it.
ENCYCLOPEDIA [Easy: Success] You recall this particular mutual was posting about a different old man they usually do, adding to their repertoire of old men they'd like to impregnate, breed, or generally fantasize about. Perhaps you could encourage them by asking them more about this new old man? After all, encouraging a hyperfixation is rather nice of you.
EMPATHY [Trivial: Success] It would absolutely be, they would enjoy it more than anything in this world. Go on, type an ask.
COMPOSURE [Medium: Failure] Despite the inviting nature of the ask box, it suddenly feels more daunting than usual, leaving you feeling unsure of what to do.
PERCEPTION (TOUCH) [Challenging: Success] You feel a bead of sweat roll down your forehead and backside, cool against your skin, causing you to tense slightly in your chair. The palms of your hands feel a little clammy, almost cold as well from the moisture of the sweat gathering.
PERCEPTION (HEARING) [Challenging: Success] You also feel the rate of your breathing increase slightly, not to a level of a panic attack, or even near one. It's slightly irregular, not as smooth and coordinated as it should be usually at rest.
ENDURANCE - It can't be seriously this difficult to write a few sentences, can it?
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Just ask about the old man already and have it be done and over, besides, it could be another old man to add to *our* repertoire, right?
HALF LIGHT [Formidable: Success] Come on, get a damned grip on yourself, it's just a fucking screen, it can't seriously be this daunting? Just type the ask already.
PERCEPTION (HEARING) [Challenging: Success] Rather quite quickly, you hear your breathing steady, back to a regular, normal pace.
COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] You quickly gather yourself up, back to the sleek, cool operation you normally run. Well, as sleek and cool as possible for you, anyway.
INTERFACING [Easy: Failure] You place your hands on the keyboard, ready to type an ask, however, perhaps your fingers were a bit slippery still from the sweat, your keyboard a bit greasy from the oils on your skin coating the keys through use, or perhaps you just can't properly articulate your thoughts about this old man, nothing recognizable as words appears on the screen as you type, rather resembling a random assortment of punctuation, letters, and numbers. On top of that, you accidentally clicked the ask button, sending it to your mutual.
HALF LIGHT - You fucking blew it, you absolutely buffoon. No point in trying to deny the consequences of your actions now, they've already gotten the ask. They're probably already reading it now.
ENCYCLOPEDIA [Easy: Success] You should be aware there's the term "keysmash", perhaps your mutual would interpret the random assortment of keystrokes as something rather positive.
ENCYCLOPEDIA [Medium: Success] Besides, you remember them responding quite positively to asks like those.
LOGIC [Easy: Success] That is true, yes. There should be no real difference with you, and given you're mutuals, the chances of things going right with this ask are significantly higher, if they weren't already guaranteed to begin with. Have confidence in yourself for this.
SAVOIR FAIRE - This was a cool moment, let's have a cool getaway too.
LOGIC - I'm not exactly sure how we would have a cool getaway, but sure, to humor you, I suppose.
SAVOIR FAIRE [Trivial: Success] You easily navigate away from your mutual's page, through continuing to scroll down your feed.
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Wip Wednesday
Just gonna post a bit of the up-and-coming chapter 12 of The Lighthouse Keeper and then I will be out of your hair, I promise.
. . . . .
“Sabine. Relax.”
At the sound of Ahsoka’s voice—soft and measured, mildly imploring and just a little amused—Sabine paused.
She pried her gaze off the hangar floor and raised her head, a snipe loaded and ready on her tongue. Turning to the other woman, she just managed to cut the retort off before her voice brought it out.
Taking a slow breath, she pulled her shoulders back and unlocked her crossed arms. “Sorry,” she offered, dismissively but without sting at least.
Ahsoka let a moment pass in quiet, covering it by taking a seat on one of the supply crates near the rayshield, her movements precise and deliberate but gradual, her posture structured and yet ever at ease. “You seem nervous,” she commented as one might on the weather.
Sabine sighed in concession. “I don’t know why.”
“There’s a sense of change in the Force,” Ahsoka explained in that serene way that made Sabine want to scream, “some anxiety is an understandable response.”
In the privacy of her helmet, Sabine rolled her eyes. “I don’t feel ‘changes in the Force.’”
“Yes, you do; everyone does.” Setting her hands on the crate behind her, Ahsoka leaned back leisurely. With a jump in her brow and a glint in her eye that said she already knew, she nodded to Sabine, casting a pointed glance over her. “Why are you wearing your armour today?”
Looking down at herself, she grit her teeth. Irritation prickled across her skin as she traced her thought process that morning back to its initial spark and found it was, simply, that she felt like she should.
Really, it was more involved than that, but all those in-between connections were hard to conceptualize.
There were some tangible clues—things she had seen, things she couldn’t help but notice. Like how Din had been quieter than usual the night before, how he hadn’t even tried to follow the conversation at dinner, how he had left early, a cloud of preoccupation clinging to him. And then later, when she waited in the galley, trying not to hold out too high a hope that he might join her, she saw him come by… and walk right on past. He sequestered away in the Phantom, looking more distracted than like he was purposely avoiding her…
Still.
Something was happening.
And some part of her had already assembled the puzzle, already read what the colours and lines all spelled out; she just couldn’t figure out if she was hiding the answer from herself or if it wasn’t meant for her to grasp.
“Can you at least tell me if it’s a good change?” she asked now, opening her hands out.
Ahsoka’s expression pulled in apology. “Things are often what we make of them.”
Oddly enough, the cryptic answer didn’t fuel Sabine’s aggravation; instead, it extinguished it.
“I feel like I know what it is,” she confessed. Her arms folded into themselves again but not in a locking or protecting way; Ahsoka had a (most likely) unconscious knack for riling her up but the annoyance was toothless and easily mollified.
Sabine turned her head, just slightly, angling her gaze towards the view out of the hangar’s hatch: all stars, sprays of dust, and bits of rocks—some just hanging, some set in perpetual motion by some force or other, sent to twirl and drift forever.
“I don’t know how I know; I just do. But I don’t know… if I’m ready. I don’t want things to change.”
Silence flowed in on the tail of her words.
She turned to Ahsoka, as if to check she hadn’t disappeared.
She hadn’t.
She sat there still, on the crate, gaze mild and unreadable. Eventually, she tilted her head and raised her brows, prompting.
“Well?” Sabine said. “Where is it?”
“Where’s what?”
“The inevitable nugget of Jedi wisdom tbat’s supposed to make me see this all in a different light?”
Ahsoka laughed—just a smile, a light breath out her nose, and a tip of her head. “You don’t truly want to hear it; you just want me to say it so you can scoff and roll your eyes.”
“No,” Sabine said in a wounded tone (even though, just to herself, she had to face the fact that Ahsoka was not wrong).
#I have decided I like to write ahsoka as like a distant aunt trying to connect with her niblings#sabine wren#ahsoka tano#star wars rebels#the mandalorian#my writing#wip#work in progress#wip wednesday#lift a sail
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For the fanfic ask thing: 6, 7, 8, 17, 22, 23, 26, 29, 35, 39, 42, 49, 68 and 75 c:
6. What's the last line you wrote?
"... he may yet make a surprisingly great trainer!"
Victor couldn't help the sneer of his top lip, or the darkening of his brow, or the way he parted his teeth just slightly and asked: "What do you mean, 'surprisingly'?"
Title: To the Victor Goes the Spoils
Fandom: Pokémon (Sword & Shield)
Relationship(s): Victor/Hop
7. Post a snippet from a WIP.
Brassius has no classmates to celebrate with; no teachers to particularly thank. Within the month, he finds an empty warehouse studio in Artazon for his fantastical sculptures and fills the gardens of his new home with roses; agave; blackberries.
Title: Carnivore
Fandom: Pokémon (Scarlet & Violet)
Relationship(s): Hassel/Brassius
8. Post an out-of-context spoiler from a WIP.
"Jack we have to go."
"... I can't."
"We have to, pet. We'll be found if we stay here, and to be quite frank..." he trails off, wincing. He folds his lips together ponderously and tries again: "... to be honest, you don't look like you could squash a roach, let alone kill a Splicer."
Title: Dark and Familiar and Deep as the Sea (re-write)
Fandom: Bioshock 1 + 2
Relationship(s): Jack Ryan/Atlas
17. Do you have a writing routine?
Absolutely not.
22. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?
Fandom and music have always gone hand in hand for me, so most of my titles end up being song lyrics!
I usually write with a title in mind, but sometimes it changes during the "drafting" process.
23. What is the easiest and what is the hardest: beginnings, middles, ends?
Beginnings are easier, certainly.
Endings are very difficult for me. I have a hard time conceptualizing a good stopping point in my stories; a lot of the time they keep going of their own volition, but not necessarily linearly.
26. What's your least favourite part of the writing process?
Drafting.
I can't do word vomit; I can't write things badly on purpose; I don't entirely understand how drafting works. Someone needs to take my brain and my hands and do it for me so I can have the template muscle memory to do it on my own.
29. What's something about your writing that you're proud of?
I like to think that I'm quite good at dialogue, and I think I'm getting better at making my overall prose snappier and more minimalist.
35. What's your favourite fic that you've posted?
Overall? Probably At the End of the Line (Maybe a Diamond Ring). It's relatively well-written; the ending actually ends somewhat cleanly; it paces well compared to most of my other works. I'm pleased with it. I wouldn't change it.
More recently, I'm quite fond of My Lover Stands on Golden Sands, but I also don't like the ending all that much anymore. I feel like it just... falls off at the end.
39. Most self-indulgent WIP?
I wouldn't strictly call it a WIP, but I still have a few passages from a completed Nuzlocke (OmegaRuby / X) that I was going to transfer into a prose format. It has a lot of headcanons and self-insert-y elements without it being a straight-up self-insert fanfiction.
42. What's your favourite title you've come up with?
Mentioned above, I have two (named) Pokémon stories in the works. One is "Carnivore" and one is "To the Victor Goes the Spoils". I like both.
Out of my published works I think Dark and Familiar and Deep as the Sea is my favourite (although this fic I'd hardly consider to be published in its current state). The Blue Tide Pulling me Under is also pretty up there.
49. What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?
I don't think I can accurately answer this because I kind of know what I want my writing to aspire to be, but I don't really know what it is. I don't know my own quirks, I only can hazard a guess as to what I would want them to be. It would probably be a question better posed to a member of my audience rather than me.
However, true as I may think that is, it's a bit of a cop-out answer. If I had to choose I'd probably pick Athair. It needs to be re-written, though.
68. Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way that you do?
My one true fanfiction love is Hang the Fool, and that's probably influenced me the most in terms of style. It's a story that's repetitive without lingering past its welcome; it's very articulate while still being descriptive. I admire it greatly.
75. Is there a particular fic that your readers gravitate towards that you didn't expect?
My five most popular works are as follows:
Aphrodite
Athair
You're Gonna be My Bruise
Frame and Wire
The Blue Tide Pulling me Under
I don't understand why Aphrodite is ranked so highly. Maybe because it's my oldest Bioshock work and has simply been around the longest? I think it's pretty crap now, but I also think some of my newer stuff is worse.
You're Gonna be My Bruise I think is the biggest surprise. I truly think this is my worst one. It's too short. It's written poorly. It is simply bad. Why do you people like it so much?
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It's Gendering Time Baby (aka Fenn's weird thoughts about his gender in essay form)
Okay, so it's really late at night while I'm writing this (not the same time that I'll post probably) but my brain's going on a spiral tangent thing so I wanna go down it while I can. So I'm prolly gonna ramble, I apologize in advance.
So anyway, I feel like my relationship with my gender is... unique? I don't know, I see a lot of people talk about how they feel like a man or woman or nonbinary person, or how they feel like nothing or something neutral or "just themselves" but from what I've heard the latter usually call themselves agender or neutrois or something like that. If I had to pick one, I legitimately don't know what I'd say. I know your experience as a kid isn't the end-all-be-all for your identity, but I tend to look back at mine a lot to make sure I'm not adopting a label that doesn't represent me at all—but when I was a kid, I had no conceptualization of gender. It just wasn't something I noticed. Hell, I noticed differences in height more than I noticed differences in gender at the time. If you asked kid me, they'd probably just say, "Huh? What do you mean? How can you feel like a gender??" So that's not particularly helpful.
I didn't really start noticing gender until I learned that trans people existed (high school; had Christian parents and was overall pretty sheltered). And I only really learned about it in the context of "some people feel so strongly about gender that they wish to transition." So of course little me, who barely noticed gender at all, thought that they must be a demigirl because they were born a girl but didn't really feel anything. (I know now that's not what "demigirl" necessarily stands for lol but give lil me a break.) But their parents rejected them and of course, since they now had no other way to express this potential side of them, little me went exploring more. They found labels like "agender" and "neutrois" that seemed to fit their experience so much better, and so the demigirl label was dropped. But it still didn't feel like them, and they still don't feel like me.
You see, my gender is a pretty complicated thing that I like to ignore most of the time. But there was one time I tried to give a friend a metaphor to describe it, and that's the best thing I've got even now so here it is. I have a slightly interesting physical problem when whenever I strain my shoulders too much, the skin on my back becomes really sensitive and if I move in the slightest, it feels like my shoulder blades will break through my skin (consequence of carrying too heavy bookbags in grade school). But sometimes I can feel it starting to get bad because it feels like a hole is forming between my shoulder blades, like a cavern, where muscles that should be chill and calm feel almost like they're being sliced. (I promise this isn't a medical problem.) And my gender almost feels like that cave: a wide, open space lined with smooth, water-worn stone and closed to the open air, with a massive lake at the bottom and a single stalactite hanging from the ceiling. Water occasionally drips down from the stalactite and into the lake, and that's my gender, except the lake feels like nothing and my gender is diluted once it hits the surface of Me. I have a gender, maybe, but it's in parts per million instead of wholes.
So I'm basically agender, right? Or I'm some sublabel like libramasculine if my gender feels important to me still, but problem solved, right? Well, those labels technically fit from a technical perspective, but they still feel wrong. I may not have a gender, or at least a strong one, in the sense of having strong preferences about how I'm treated or seen, but at the same time I do? But it comes more in the form of likes and dislikes. I like being seen as a masculine (gender-wise) person over a feminine (gender-wise) person. I like being seen as a feminine as fuck (presentation-wise) dude instead of as a girl who doesn't care for themself. These feel like they come more from my personality than from a gender, so my gender is still technically nothing, but it still feels wrong to label myself as agender or something similar when I have such notable feelings about the matter.
So what do I do instead? Well, I play gender, like how a toddler "plays" as an animal or how a kid "plays" as a character from their favorite TV show. Everything I perform is still me—it's my desires, dislikes, and personality—but I get to be a boy thing instead of what people wanted me to be. If my birth gender is old and crusty and doesn't fit, then I get to choose something cooler, a new role I can play. The difference doesn't really matter on a day-to-day basis, does it? No one can tell if I knew since birth or if I'm faking it or if I'm somewhere in between, so what does it matter? What I know for sure is what I want to do with my body: I want to lop off my boobs and I maybe want to take testosterone. And I like being a boy in a dress. So, technically I don't really feel a gender? But I still don't identify with agender or any of the adjacent "lack at least some gender" labels because it feels weird trying to put a label on something that isn't there. I just call myself a transmasc nonbinary boy/man and move on with my life, because if I stop and think about it I'll confuse myself all over again.
#nonhumanity offers a wonderfully different way to think about gender too#and I kinda prefer it#where I'm a man like I'm a male dog—yeah that's true but it doesn't matter much generally speaking#but labels like genderfuck reaaaally draw my eye because dang is my gender an interesting tangle of fucks#and also none of this even MENTIONS me using neopronouns#(which is half because they mean something and half because they're cool/I hyperfixated on them a bit for an essay)#but sometimes in the past I thought about going by catgender or pupgender#but there legitimately wasn't enough gender to warrant it; I felt too empty to call my gender dog or cat#and that's part of such a funky experience that I never hear anyone talk about so I was just curious#if anyone else feels something like that#gender things#trans#transgender#nonbinary#transmasc#transmasc nonbinary#(since that's technically what I am)#gender thoughts#fenn rambles
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Just One Moment
Pairing: Ginji Kyuuma x Keiichi Kuzuryuu
Words: 2031 words (I was suppose to write a 1000 words for this, but the fact that this fic is twice as long shows you the sheer amount of insanity I had while writing this/lh/j)
Synopsis: Kyuuma wants to start his weekend morning routine early. His boyfriend, however, would rather sleep in. Morning domestic fic bc yeah//
Late bday gift for @thee-yunatic-pixie, Happy belated bday! BY LITERALLY A WHOLE MONTH IM SO SORRY I got distracted constantly // Wow, writing corny flirting is not my cup of tea I cringed so hard while writing some dialogue, it's just Kuzuryuu and Kyuuma being silly mlms as they should be, the prompt is taken from pixie’s list of Kuzuyuuma prompts that I requested some time back! Also, this is a completely angst-less Kuzuyuuma fic for once(post-Borderlands aka no one dies-the au).
I do refer to both of them using their former titles so there is minor manga spoilers but not much, I probably should make more content for them Kuzuryuuma is non existent sadly I should just make my own food/lh.
Hope you’ll like this!
------------------ It is yet another Saturday once again, Ginji Kyuuma rouses from his sleep as soon as the first rays of the morning sun shone through the windows, illuminating the bedroom that he and his boyfriend were currently resting in. Stretching his bare frame as he lets out a long yawn, satisfied with the rest he got that night. There is something so magical and Disney movie-eque with how perfect the weather this morning is. The bright sun in the sky coupled with the chirping of birds, singing their songs to one another on the maple tree right outside the shared apartment, the red leaves an indication that fall is fast approaching. The weather seems more than suitable for a morning jog. Usually, folks would much rather sleep in during the weekend with consideration of how hectic the working days of the week were, depriving them of sleep. His boyfriend, Kuzuryuu was such a person, they often woke up much earlier and slept late during the working days of the week.
As the musician propped himself against the bed frame to tie his fluffy, almost lion mane-like hair into his usual ponytail, he looked down to see the sleeping attorney next to him. Breathing rather shallowly as he sleeps in a pose that reminds Kyuuma of a bunny when they flop over. ‘How adorable~’ was what Kyuuma thought as he gently stroked the mop of dark hair that belonged to his sleeping boyfriend, which seemed to have become much fluffier overnight. Knowing that the attorney is going to aggressively put on hair gel to get his usual sleek look back as soon as he catches sight of how horrible his bed hair is. Though most of Kuzuryuu’s body was covered up by the blanket, Kyuuma could see the designer band T-shirt that he himself was wearing just last night on his boyfriend’s smaller frame, it was clearly a little oversized for him with how loose it was at the sleeves and collar, showing off Kuzuryuu’s collarbone. Their original pajama's top half was discarded sadly at the foot of the bed in favor of Kyuuma’s shirt, leaving Kyuuma to sleep topless once again. He did not mind one bit, seeing how contented the former King of Diamonds was sleeping in it. His lips slightly parted, breathing softly. Despite being slightly chapped, it still caused Kyuuma to stare at it for some time, hypnotized. He even contemplated waking the younger man next to him with a kiss, but ultimately shook his head at that idea. Kuzuryuu’s work often caused him to overwork and generally have less sleep during the working days of the week; he definitely deserves to sleep in.
Though Kyuuma could easily spend the entire morning admiring how gorgeous his boyfriend is, he had already made plans to take a jog around the neighborhood before surprising his partner with breakfast in bed. Already conceptualizing what he would like to make for breakfast: a simple grilled salmon along with some rice to go with it… maybe some green tea would be good too? He planned as he attempted to pull himself out of bed, but that was when he realized he was stuck. Blinking in surprise before glancing down once again, he was so fixated on planning breakfast that he did not even realize that Kuzuryuu had cuddled up to him. Quite like a koala to the branch of its favorite eucalyptus tree, the attorney, even while asleep, clung onto the former King of Clubs tightly. Kyuuma could have sworn Kuzuryuu shivered against him, it seems like the attorney was feeling a little chilly considering how close the fall was. Even the weighted blanket that covered both of their bodies didn't seem to help much with the cold. "Ginji-", the once asleep attorney murmured, his eyes still shut, but it did seem like Kyuuma's movements did cause him to rouse from his sleep.
"Keii?Did I wake you up by accident? I'm sorry babe-'' The musician muttered apologetically, his hand gently caressing Kuzuryuu’s cheek as the lawyer slowly woke up. Kuzuryuu shook his head rather slowly, Kyuuma wasn't sure if he was trying to wake himself up or if he was answering the question. Obviously, Kuzuryuu still looked rather tired, with their bare cognitive functions working on autopilot as they almost instinctively wrapped their arms tighter around Kyuuma’s midsection, nudging their face into the crook of Kyuuma’s neck as they clung onto him. Under all that jaded exterior, Kyuuma always finds himself lucky to be the only one to experience Kuzuryuu's more affectionate and gentle side. Especially behind closed doors, the attorney is rather tender and loving. Kyuuma gets the full experience of his affections first thing in the morning, the sleepier Kuzuryuu is, the more unknowingly clingy he can be. The former King of Clubs blushed, automatically putting his hands around his lover’s thin waist to pull him closer, he could already feel Kuzuryuu's warm breath against his bare skin as he croaked out a rather groggy sounding 'Good morning', their voice scratchy from the lack of hydration for the last seven hours. Kuzuryuu moved his head to look up at Kyuuma's face, though his eyes were not fully open, the light from the window did cause the amber under those heavy lids to shine slightly. No matter how bright their eyes are, they will always be beautiful to the curly-haired musician; who gently pressed his lips to their forehead, causing the attorney to form a rare smile. "Babe, good morning to you too~" Kyuuma purred back at the sleepy raven-haired man who clung to him. It took Kuzuryuu a while to compose himself as the musician let Kuzuryuu rest his head on his chest. "What time is it..?" They finally asked, clearly comfortable, their limited attention was focused on fidgeting with Kyuuma's ponytail.
"It's 8 am in the morning, Keii! I need to go running!" Kuzuryuu's eyes parted slightly, "Ginji, it's a Saturday morning-" he protested, grumbling as he shifted himself off from sitting on his boyfriend’s lap to lying back down on the bed. Half his face was now obscured by a pillow, bleary eyes looked back up at the musician. “It’s called a routine, Keiichi~! And besides, a workout routine could be good for a sleepy head like you, you know, you should try it sometimes! '' Kyuuma teased, only causing the other man to shake his head and roll his eyes at the teasing. The musician can tell that his boyfriend is smiling, just by the way his eyebrows were pointed, definitely not in the usual scowl he wore most of the time but rather perked up. “Studies do show it boosts energy." Kyuuma peeled the pillow away from Kuzuryuu's grip and face. "And besides, it's just a small price to pay to keep maintaining my God body~” Kyuuma emphasized the last two words while winking at his partner, his hands strategically rested on his hips before puffing up his chest like how a magnificent frigatebird would do to attract a partner. Succeeding as this seems to have immediately caught Kuzuryuu’s eyes and attention, looking at him and reacting as if this was the first time he saw, in Kyuuma's own words, his 'glorious pecs'. The proof is in the pudding and those abs won’t lie, the attorney felt their cheeks heating up and simply placed an arm over their face in an ill attempt to cover up their embarrassment.
“Well,” they breathed, pinching their nose bridge to curb the sudden flow of blood towards it, “The evidence is factually reliable but then again I am very much biased towards you." A small smile remained on Kuzuryuu's face as he laid back in bed, seemingly coming more to his senses. "Well, you certainly seem more awake now, you are speaking like an attorney once again.” he joked before gently nudging Kuzuryuu’s shoulder, “Hey, since you're up…do you want to get up for breakfast? Or perhaps join me for a jog?" Kyuuma's soft warm touches were met with the former King of Diamonds ' own cold hand holding onto his, the musician had immediately brought it to his lips, gently blowing hot air at it in an attempt to warm it up. Kuzuryuu did not respond instantly to Kyuuma's question, a lazy smile on his face as he ran his thumb over the musician's left hand as his boyfriend continued to warm him up. Massaging the guitar calluses that formed over his boyfriend's fingertips, the proof of years of playing the electric bass and the acoustic guitar which was something the former King of Clubs took great pride in. The attorney shook his head, "Maybe later, I think I'll like to rest for a little more… ", Kuzuryuu turned the offer down, looking up at Kyuuma rather nervously hoping that the taller curly haired man didn’t feel saddened by the rejection. Instead, Kyuuma nodded his head, his smile always so genuine, leaning down to kiss Kuzuryuu’s forehead once again did it dissolve any lingering worry the attorney had, his boyfriend is the most understanding person to him and he knows it. The moment Kyuuma tried to get up to leave once again did something click for Kuzuryuu, their hand was still interlocked with their boyfriends, tugging on it to get him to look back at their laying figure on the bed.
“Keiichi?” Kyuuma looked at them confused, his feet already planted on the ground next to the king-sized bed the two of them share, already one foot pointing towards the nearest bathroom just down the hall. “Do you need something, babe?” The former king of diamond nodded, “You.” Kyuuma immediately sat back down on the ruffled-up sheets, wordlessly pointing to himself, clearly flustered. “...You in bed so I can cuddle with you a little more.” the attorney explained, gently tugging on his hand again, getting him to lie down next to him, the musician obliges easily. They were practically sharing a pillow right now, literally breathing against each other’s faces and necks as Kyuuma reached for Kuzuryuu’s face with his spare hand. His strumming hand seems less rough than his fretting one, delicately playing with the bangs of dark hair that fall over Kuzuryuu’s amber eyes. “Can you stay in bed with me for just one moment.” a bit of his usual seriousness coming through in his voice, he wanted Kyuuma to keep him company for a while longer, “...please. You are so warm and nice to snuggle up to, and the bed will be so cold without you,” he admitted, hoping it was a convincing enough argument for Kyuuma to stay with him instead.
Completely forgoing the idea of having a morning jog at this point in time (and also knowing he can’t win an argument against an ACTUAL lawyer who is also his boyfriend), Kyuuma resigned himself to his fate, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend who had begun to drift in and out of consciousness. “How about we go to bed early tonight, and head to the park tomorrow morning?” Kuzuryuu suggested sleepily, yawning in between words as Kyuuma pulled the weighted blanket over the both of them, “Mmm, sounds like a plan…” Kyuuma agreed as Kuzuryuu went back to sleep, snuggling against Kyuuma once more as he hummed a small tune to help him sleep better. It was a lullaby, the musician had realized that it helped ease his partner’s mind, it evidently work as the attorney fell silent once again. Kyuuma gently petted Kuzuryuu’s back as he slept, the repetitive mindless motion as well as the comfiness of the bed and his boyfriend practically clinging to him like a certain marsupial made Kyuuma more bored and relaxed once again, feeling heavy-lidded as he let out a yawn, ‘One moment, I will take a short nap and be up in a bit, maybe I will still have time to jog once around the house before breakfast.’, he unknowingly lied to himself as he held his sleeping partner close to him. And before the former King of Clubs knew it, he was out like a light.
The both of them ended up sleeping for an additional hour that morning. ------------------
#alice in borderland#Imawa no Kuni no Alice#keiichi kuzuryu#kyuuma ginji#they are just a little fruity#Bambee's writings#kuzuyuuma#aib
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So update on that au I was thinking of making!
I’m making it!
4Clones AU where the clones persist after being made, the more often they are called out the stronger and more independent they become. (Or if they’re made with strong enough intent that they gain their own sentience and personalities that makes them stronger by default)
More info under the cut!
Ppl who saw my last post conceptualizing this au probably noticed there’s an “Evil” clone. That’s actually Theatre Kid MK! (Nicknamed Theo) I’ll explain him later haha
Noodle: (delivery MK, orange) Noodle is the most mature of the group, being the first clone to be made. He’s a responsible older brother for everyone else. He looks out for their mental and physical well-being, often making food for the others (who easily fixate on their work and forget to eat). He still has his powers, but making himself bigger/smaller comes naturally. He carries the braincell.
Artie: (artist clone, purple) Artie is a tired bitch who needs sleep. He’s considered to be twins with Theo (despite being made first) due to their similar interests and personalities. He’s very driven and focused on his craft, and will not hesitate to destroy anyone who gets in his way. His one track mind usually leads to extreme burnout, which is why he appears tired all the time. He eventually gets adopted by Sandy bc I said so!
Theo: (theatre clone, blue) Theo is an actor, and was made by me for the purpose of this au lol. Much like Artie, he is very focused on what he wants to achieve. For Theo, this mostly meant meeting Macaque and being taught a thing or two about acting. Turns out, Macaque was willing to teach him more than just acting and ended up using his own powers to make Theo VERY durable. So durable that he could persist after a major injury if the need be. This eventually leads into some other stuff I might write about later but are hinted at in the doodles-?
Porty: (porty mk, pink) Porty is porty! Made with the purpose of “having fun” Porty manages to achieve this in the most gremliny way possible. He’s considered the youngest due to his immature personality, he is also slightly shorter than the other clones. He’s focused more on himself most of the time and often forgets about others’ feelings. If he does notice someone is down he does his best to cheer them back up, and struggles with his own feelings of inadequacy when it doesn’t work. He eats music (and whatever Noodle feeds him) and has no friends, despite claiming to have an absurd amount.
I also drew them all as monkies at the mention of them on the discord I was talking about them on heeheehoohoo
#4clones#monkie kid#lmk#qi xiaotian#porty mk#porty clone#delivery clone#painter clone#theatre clone mk#Noodle#artie#theo#porty#alternate universe
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["My argument is that the operative locus of the alliance between conservative evangelicals and anti-trans feminists, lying far beneath the superficial embrace of 'biological reality' as the final arbiter in social categorisation, and beneath even the affective expression of visceral fears of cis annihilation, is an intersecting fundamental opposition, on grounds of moral intuition rather than empirical principle, to dualistic philosophies that separate the mind or soul or spirit from the body— or, in a slightly different formulation, philosophies that separate biological sex from sociological gender. It is not simply that they both believe in an ontological sex or gender binary that drives their activism, but that they both instinctively view this as the best framework for understanding, organising, and improving human relations regardless of any ostensible scientific or philosophical justification for this idea. It is their belief that human society in its current form should be structured around sex binarism, and their feeling that to abandon this structure is morally wrong, not their belief that sex binarism is true on an aetiological or taxonomic level, that motivates their campaigns and creates the common ground on which they rally.
This cluster of concepts (biological sex, gender, and the mind) only makes intuitive sense if we lean heavily on our post-Enlightenment epistemology. The grounds upon which appeals to a 'scientific' view of the essential differences between men and women is based was popularised not so very long ago. As historian Thomas Laqeur explored in his book Making Sex: Body and Gender From the Greeks to Freud (1990), 'sex as we know it,' a sharp anatomical and later chromosomal separation between males and females, was effectively invented within Western medical culture in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, a process that Laqeur calls the 'discursive creation of difference.' The advent of an endocrinological (hormonal) basis for sex differentiation is even more recent, deriving from the early twentieth century. It is possible to overstate the universality of this process as it worked its way through the furrows of social and political life in the colonial homelands and out into the vast, oppressive expanses of Empire. By the mid-twentieth century, though, the binary sex model had embedded itself into the firmament of popular scientific knowledge, even while the troubling preponderance of exceptions— those bothersome people who simply do not fit the anatomical, endocrinological, or chromosomal 'norm'— threatened to knock this far-too-neat human-sorting system out of sync.
We tend to think of gender as a looser, thoroughly socially constructed appendage to sex that allows for a wider range of identities and ways of expressing one's self, but as Jules Gill-Peterson demonstrates in her book Histories of the Transgender Child (2018), mid-century White sexologists in North America and Europe— the very people who made it their business to set the boundaries of medicalised gender-nonconformity— viewed the terminology of gender not as a tool to legitimise (much less celebrate) diversity, but rather as a way to preserve binary sex as a conceptual framework. If an individual could not be easily classified as male or female because certain sexual characteristics fell outside the normative range of variation, they could at least be made to conform as closely as possible to to the behavioral and presentational gendered expectations of men and women. Of course, this is not what gender theorists usually refer to when they talk of gender today, nor is it the interpretation that anti-trans figures use when they speak of gender ideology. For the latter, gender is a cheap way for an individual to deny but not override the immutable reality of sex, creating a distinction— a duality— between our socialised patterns of self-projection on the one hand, and the sexual characteristics of our bodies on the other. Mind is thus set against body, feelings against 'reality.']
rebecca jane morgan, from gender heretics: evangelicals, feminists, and the alliance against trans liberation, 2023
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good morning tiny friends inside of my phone i hope those of u who are awake are having a good day so far and those of u who are not awake i also hope u eventually have a good day as well :-) i've been trying to wake up earlier than i usually do which typically doesnt last longer than a few days for me because of my adhd and the insomnia that goes along with it, BUT! i have a two day streak so far so. thats nice lol.
anyways i am just sharing my morning thoughts with u all......almost every day for the past two and a half years i've made myself write phone notes of song lyrics or concepts or ideas or record little melody snippets in my voice memos whenever they happen to pop up in my head (if im able to in the moment, like if im not busy or at a health appointment or something) so that hopefully i can use at least some of them to make music or poems or art in general....so because of that i now have literally hundreds of fully or partially written songs, a few poems, a lot of slightly incoherent rambles, some snazzy melodies to practice on my guitar or with midi instruments in garageband lol, and a few ideas for entire albums or eps that i think would be really fun to explore.....its nice cuz i've always been super drawn to the idea of keeping a physical journal for myself, which i do try to do also, but because of my forgetfulness from adhd and also because holding a pen/pencil and the journal book and taking the time to write all that kinda stuff on paper can be too physically painful for me pretty often with my chronic pain and autoimmune flareups, the act of typing it all out into a digital notepad where i dont have to erase spelling errors or try to hold a big book steady enough that my writing is legible with my shaky hands is just way more accessible for me and so much faster.....
.....anyways again i just thought i'd share that with u guys! idk if anyone following me here who reads my occasional real life ramble posts is like, also a musician or songwriter or even a writer or artist in general and struggles with getting ideas down quickly like i do so, it's a neat work around for that issue for me at least. i don't always remember to but i like to try and write the date and time at the top whenever i do save songs or thoughts or poems just for my own sake of knowing what i was thinking or processing at a particular time in my life. all of this to say i woke up today and had what i think could be a really fun and creative conceptual songwriting exercise for myself that just popped into my head out of nowhere and i just spent the past hour, which is literally how long i've been awake so far lol, writing a song with that concept in mind and i really like how it turned out and how it looks in word form so i think i might try to play around with chords and stuff on my guitar and see if i can make it into an actual song, even if it's not like, the most dramatic technical groundbreaking thing ever, i'd feel good just being able to put the words to a melody at all. so that is my task for today if i can physically hold my guitar and do that, i haven't been able to much at all lately because i'm in a horrible pain flareup this month so fingers crossed 🥺🤞
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Squidbillies #20: “Rebel with a Claus” | December 25, 2006 – 12:00AM | S02E14
In this one, Early shoots down Santa Claus. His crime? Not giving Early the present he asks for every Christmas (the still-beating heart of Nascar racer Jeff Gordon). He and Rusty have him tied up in a chair. They kill and skin his reindeer and torture Santa. The elves try to rescue him but they also get brutalized. And that’s basically the one joke of this one: Santa is viciously brutalized by the Cuyler’s. It might as well be an episode of Happy Tree Friends.
I really hate this one and find it mostly unfunny. The main joke is not just the violence, but also mocking movie/crime show tropes. The Elves here are shown having tactical gear, and operate as a militarized unit on Santa’s behalf. That’s a fun choice, but none of it makes me laugh. I also appreciate Dave Willis’ performance as Santa. He is the official Santa of Adult Swim, as far as I’m concerned (eagle-eyed viewers will remember that he played Santa in Aqua Teen Hunger Force and, I believe, Space Ghost Coast to Coast! Maybe other places!). It also evokes horror movies like Saw, or Last House on the Left, portraying both Early and Rusty as being unrepentant, dangerously violent hillbillies. I guess that makes this episode conceptual. It doesn’t make it funny. I don’t know, it just doesn’t suit this show too well, despite the fact that unpleasant humor is sorta this show’s bread and butter. My least favorite episode so far.
That’s it for Squidbillies for now! Isn’t that nice??
ANNOUNCEMENT! PLEASE READ!
For various reasons, I’ve decided to postpone Space Ghost week, ever-so-slightly. Longtime readers (all six of you), know that I’ve adopted the custom of taking a break from Adult Swim when I complete a calendar year so I can tackle a different season Space Ghost Coast to Coast. But I’m going to wait until we get through January of 2007 before I do Space Ghost week. That’s because...
1. I could use a little time to catch-up on creating a backlog of posts that will make the task easier, and I’m in the middle of a holiday weekend as of this writing and might actually be able to. I couldn’t do this in time because of various calamities.
2. Technically speaking, the final episode of the 1997 season of Space Ghost aired in January of 1998 (January 1, to be exact), so why not mirror that as well?
3. If I go through January, I will complete the rest of the runs for all the current shows we are covering, and come February Adult Swim will be refreshed with new premieres of new shows and feel more like a new beginning than an interruption.
Three good reasons! Well, one good reason, the other two are symptoms of some sort of brain problem. But still, they had numbers next to them. You have to admit that.
EPHEMERA CORNER
youtube
End-of-the-year Marathons (December 25-31, 2006)
At the end of 2006, Adult Swim ran several marathons several nights in a row. Until the end of the year, as a matter-of-fact. They were:
December 25: The Venture Bros December 26: The Boondocks December 27: Robot Chicken December 28: Squidbillies December 30: Bleach December 31: Metalocalypse For these nights they forewent their usual custom of airing the block and repeating it again, in order to show more episodes of shows. In Squidbillies and Metalocalypse’s case they partially repeated some episodes, but the desired effect was to have the entire series up to that point air in a row. I remember recording these and making DVDs from them. It was very handy at the time!
MAIL BAG
lisa lisa mailbagger here: lol I was literally referencing that complication album hit, I tried looking for it on youtube but had no success. A lot of those albums even if they were 80s themed had such ambiguous names it makes them impossible to search. If only discogs had a section for those collections.
Oh WOW. Yeah, I remember discogs had a thing where you could search for songs to see what releases it appeared on, but that was in beta and I think they removed it for being bad. I have a strong suspicion that those commercials turned up a lot on MTV. Just download some Beavis and Butt-head Moron-a-thons and go through ‘em.
mattpanreblogsstuff writes:
The fact that in the DOOM bumps you can see an ornament of Bloo (from CN's Foster's) in the corner while DOOM is getting completely wasted. Godly combo.
I never notice that! I remember watching these bumps at least a couple times and admittedly didn’t rewatch them when I posted that video. Also I didn’t really watch Foster’s Home that much, but what little I saw was great, and I should probably watch it.
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oh yes I have something I've been wanting to tell you & I should get it out now before I get distracted again...
so I think it was with Countermelody that I started really commenting on stories & because of the response I got from you, I started commenting on pretty much every story I read. (I couldn't NOT talk to you about Countermelody, my brain literally wouldn't let me live until I did) but before Countermelody, I didn't really comment & also I wasn't really paying attention to who was writing what. however~ I recently realized that you wrote Bear With Me, which was actually the first series I read (everything else at the time were one-shots) & I was blown away by how invested I got into the story o: I had no idea that there are incredible writers on tumblr! (but now I do & I appreciate you all so much)
Bear With Me's exploration of companionate love vs (or overlap with?) romantic love & balancing chasing your dreams vs (or clashing with?) domestic bliss was so captivating...I remember staying up late to finish each chapter at the end of the day. BWM Jimin ruined me for sure 😭
I would love to learn about the making of Bear With Me! 🤗 what spurred you to write it? were there pillars you stuck to while writing it? what did your characterization planning look like? I don't even know if these are the right questions to ask, but I wanna know everythinggggggg
Ahh hi dear friend! Thank you so much for sending me this ask!
I'm so glad that Countermelody and Bear with Me resonate with you so much! It’s probably pretty safe to say that people always love getting to talk about their stories! And it’s been a joy to learn more of yours! As we've gotten to know each other better, I've been so grateful for our conversations about these deeper themes of identity and relationships, especially as they evolve over time. So much more to chat about, and so much more to learn. 💜
Bear with Me was meant to unpack exactly that -- what is capital “L” Love? Does it change? How so? Seems silly to say that love was the main theme for this story, as we’re all usually thinking and singing and writing about love, especially the love ARMY has for our boys.
But, to that point, what actually prompted me to write it was love for my mother. It is, in many ways, her story.
Or, rather, our story.
Here’s more about the making of Bear with Me, with specifics and spoilers after the jump for anybody who’d like to check out the story first. For those of you who have, especially you, dear @yuugehn, I hope you enjoy reading this post! (Needless to say, it got very long lol, but because it means a lot.) And as always, to anyone who spends some time in the BWM universe, thank you for reading with me!
I’ve written a little bit about my writing process, and how I use case conceptualizations using the cognitive behavioral theory framework to set up my characters and their arcs.
For Bear with Me, the core theme that I wanted to explore was whether platonic and romantic love are actually any different, and what those similarities and differences mean. But the main questions for Jimin and Red are slightly different than that, say, of Kittenfishing’s characterizations of Kitt, Taehyung, and Yoongi.
The characterizations and underlying themes became:
Jimin = Freedom
Red = Control
And, with regard to Love:
Jimin = What does Love look like? Feel like? Smell like? Taste like? 😏
Red = How do all the uncontrollable aspects of life impact our experience of Love?
Jimin’s character is as nebulous and freeform as Love itself. He doesn’t follow any particular plan. He shapes his life by following his intuition (e.g., joining the gig economy rather than pursuing a traditionally established career) and his strengths (e.g., modeling, which involves showing off his innate features). He shows compassion as he acts on his freedom, but he is always responsible for his actions, and he takes responsibility for the actions of others. He has unending empathy for those close to him. He is fiercely protective. He always wants to have a happy, good time. He houses the more unsavory dimensions of love: jealousy, pettiness, possessiveness. Everyone knows Red as his; he’s the one who names her. But he houses the best, too. He gives everything -- everything -- to Red.
Red’s character sets off by following a plan. In many ways, The Plan. In the beginning, she (and the rest of the cast) are young, but she acts her age, well within the parameters of what is acceptable by society. She’s studying nursing, something difficult and respectable, something meant to be healing and charitable to society. When life throws her a curveball in the form of an unplanned pregnancy, she decides to welcome this new life. And when life throws her another curveball in the form of a miscarriage, she mourns the loss wholeheartedly. She feels like both situations are somehow her fault, or the result of something faulty within her, as if she has stepped too far outside of what is expected of her. But both events actually help her continue this path of following The Plan, this socially-constructed expectation that she was too young to have a child then, and she's better off having a child later in life, when she is more established.
The eventual joining of these two characters is meant to speak to the joy that comes with the balance of Freedom and Control in our lives, especially as that balance pertains to Love. When the characters are further along in their lives, Red comes to the realization that she is stable enough to have a baby. In a traditional sense, she doesn’t really have control over that because she isn’t partnered at that time. So, she takes control by seeking other ways to have a baby. Jimin, who so loves Red, steps up, because he so badly wants to give her everything that she wants and needs.
They continue their initial patterns in that Jimin bends over backwards to do everything that he can to realize Red’s dreams. And Red holds the fort down, maintaining control of their home life and keeping everything as stable as possible.
Namjoon arrives as a representation of societal norms, which is something @parkblooming truly dug deeper into, with an assessment of how gender roles even come into play (thank you for caring so much to share such amazing thoughts about the story!!). I chose Namjoon purposefully here because my core understanding of his character sets him up nicely to reinforce Red’s initial view of the world: he is also in the medical field and has highly specialized work, has a stable life, and is caring for another living being.
But Red’s inevitable rejection of him is a representation of her relinquishing Control and choosing the unknown path. A Freer path.
The Love between Jimin and Red is balanced, and it becomes Truth in a way. First of all, lol, they evolve the meaning of sex. In the beginning, sex is meant to be a fun release. Over time, Jimin and Red explore sex as connection, expressions of love, and an act through which they can create more, and a different kind of, love.
But secondly, and more importantly, all Jimin and Red know to be true in life are each other, so they redefine all things about life with each other. They took on traditional as well as non-traditional roles to create a real home for one another. They did all the core things that society expects people to do, but they did it “out of order”, and in their own way. And that resulted in their sweet baby Mujigae, their pride and joy.
And that brings me to how this is ultimately a story about my mother and me.
My mother became a nurse because she wanted a different life than the one she saw for herself in the Philippines. It wasn’t the career she initially thought she would pursue, but, like it does for Jimin, her inevitably chosen career built upon her innate strengths (empathy, love, and caregiving) and allowed her to travel and see the world. It provided all of these incredible opportunities for her. She decided that she wanted children much later in life, compared to others her age. She suffered a miscarriage when she and my father tried for their first. And then I came along. As shown in the fic, the first baby born after a miscarriage is called a “rainbow baby”. So, I myself am a rainbow baby -- just like Mujigae, which means “rainbow” in Korean.
As such, my mother represents this balance of Freedom and Control so beautifully for me. She has lived her life completely on her own terms, but she also selflessly chose to give her life to others. She sponsored her entire family over to Canada and has been responsible for the health/well-being/happiness for our immediate family, as well as her friends and their families, and her co-workers and patients. Anytime anybody was sick or needed help, my mom was immediately there. At the same time, she is fiercely independent, doing things the way that she wants to do them. Even now, she is stubborn as hell lol. She just doesn’t do what she doesn’t want to do. She goes for opportunities that she’s passionate about. Every single move she makes is purposeful, even if that purpose is to be completely at peace and detach. And she instilled in me the same exact viewpoint, which happens to vibe quite nicely with my own personality.
Have we had difficult times? Yes. Think about Mujigae giving Red absolute hell, with all her crying and whining and annoying her with her seemingly ineffable connection with her father, Jimin (ugh don’t get me started on my father, there’s so much represented within Jimin too!!). But ultimately, my mother is my truth, and she is the one who defined what Love is. And I wrote this story (which had been brewing for a while but just needed the right cast of characters) in part, to honor her for it.
PHEW OK THIS WAS LOOONG but I hope it was interesting? Always excited to answer these kinds of questions, so reach out if you’d like more! Thanks again @yuugehn and @parkblooming for unpacking these themes with me, and thanks again to all y’all for reading!
#asks#your asks#how i write#bear with me#bts fanfiction#jimin fanfiction#yuugehn#ahhh i loved this!#thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and being so kind#lol the blonde jimin gif made me think of the references to big bird during the first fashion show lolllllll#yuugehn said#writing
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I’ve been thinking...
There's so much to extrapolate from the conceptualization of the Maralto and the Process. When I first watched 3%, I've noticed that the system was further explained and explored every season, each time showing a different layer.
First of all, it starts as being cartoonishly and sickly unjust.
However, for the entirety of Season 1, we only see the Process itself, and only a fraction of the actual life on the Inland. Although unjust, the whole trial feels functional to the plot. The Inland is shown as a grey and awful place where to live, so of course, we only root for the characters to pass all of the tests, or at least not to die trying.
It reminds me of certain criticisms aimed at stereotypical YA dystopian novels/movies, where the worldbuilding displays the society in it as generically unjust, but the characters are never shown truly struggling under the system.
Like in The Hunger Games, during the first season of 3%, the emphasis is less on fighting the system and more on getting out alive from the Process. It's a necessary step, being that it's the first season.
Secondly, in Season 2 the system starts becoming unfair.
It's slightly different than in the previous season, however, it's the first crack in the façade of the Maralto and starts showing how deeply human the system truly is.
Like I said in another post, Marcela considered giving Marco a second chance in passing the Process, because he's her son and she loves him, despite changing her mind in the end and prioritizing the Maralto's laws over him - after he failed another task. The OG Rafael tried to participate in the Process the same way his brother did one year earlier. André outright murdered his own mentor rather than losing the privilege he received in passing the Process. Not to mention the Founding Couple, who overthrew the entire society, causing countless people to die, to prevent their work from being stolen.
To sum up, in season 1 the Maralto can be reached only by one's own abilities and skills; in season 2, we're shown the collateral effects caused by this rule. The only point is not passing the Process, as much as getting to the Maralto, with any possible shortcut. Season 2 is all about the core of the selfishness that comes with the existence of the Maralto.
Thirdly, during season 3 the Maralto is shown in all of its ineffectiveness.
It all revolves around the Concha, of course, and all of the changes that it brings.
We know from season 2 that the Maralto guarantees regular vaccinations to anyone under 20 years old, as usual because they're the only ones who still matter. Nothing is done, nevertheless, to truly help them out of the horrible circumstances they grow up in. The most we see is in season 1 when Ezequiel goes (mostly) out of his way to take care of Augusto (Julia's son; she said that she chose that name for him as soon as he was born), though until it puts at risk his place at the Maralto and as the head of the Process.
Otherwise, kids on the Inland grow up poor, abused, and helpless, with the only actual support coming from the Church, that indoctrinates into worshipping the Maralto. As long as everyone lives like this, they'll all want nothing more than passing the Process and leaving that hellhole. We see it with Joana in season 1 and with Glòria throughout all the series. Thinking about it, the vaccinations are probably only there to make sure no highly contagious illness arrives on the Maralto through the Process' candidates. Elìsa herself never cared that much about the Maralto, on the contrary she didn't see the point in such a stark division, but she too was given the choice to either live in misery or well enough.
Then Michele and Fernando found the Concha. As it's shown at the front door and in practice, everyone is welcome there, and people start having a second chance. Of course it threatens the Maralto's position at the top of society.
It reminds me of the workers' struggles in various countries. I don't remember where I read it, but it was someone joking that, in the 60s, once people started having a TV at home and eating meat more than once a week, the Communist Party started having fewer militants. This is what happens when people's demands and needs are actually met. The point was never the revolution itself; it's only a necessary step after the government refuses for so long to act to improve people's living conditions.
Similarly, on 3%, once people weren't starving or getting murdered and finally had the chance to live a fulfilling life, they wouldn't turn anymore towards the Process for it. Even the Causa disappeared, since the reason for its existence became less relevant.
Finally, in the last season, the Maralto has long been stripped of any greatness it could represent for viewers, and all that's left to see is an illusion.
Once again, Joana face-plants into this new trial when she meets Veronica, and all her resolution starts faltering. Rafael and Cassia find a common ground in the way either the Causa or the Maralto's military gave them both a purpose when passing the Process wasn't an option anymore. André believes himself as the right heir of the Founding Couple and kills himself rather than living without this idea, even when the Maralto itself is gone forever. The same happens to Marco, Leonardo, and Naìr when it's time to flee. Even Natalia, the most determined militant of the Cause, ready to give her life for it, momentarily opposes destroying the Maralto when she sees how much knowledge is stored in their archives.
All in all, everyone is offered their greatest desire when coming to the Maralto - a mother, a purpose, happiness, culture - and only finds lies when they get closer.
The Maralto never worked. Laìs and Vitòr themselves had miserable lives when they'd rather choose the system they created over their only daughter.
The point is, the system was human-made, with all of the faults that come with it, and just as readily could be unmade.
To conclude:
"We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable. So did the divine rights of the kings. Any human power can be resisted and changed by human beings." - Ursula K. Le Guin
#3%#3% netflix#rant#does this make sense#michele santana#Fernando Carvalho#ezequiel#marcela alvarez#marco alvarez#andre santana#elisa#gloria#lais#vitor#tania#natalia#essay#sometimes-petty
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