#this is a long vent so im sorry about that if you read it
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This is a post I don't really feel good about writing, but at the same time, it's something I feel like I keep wanting to vent about and that I don't really...have enough places to vent about. I have my therapist, but I feel like even then, I can't unload it all on her bc I feel like I never have enough time even if it comes up here and there. Unloading it on other people who aren't her typically leads to them going on the defensive about the things I want to talk about, even when I try to be gentle or more objective in discussing it. I feel like here is one of the places I usually feel okay talking (even though I know that's probably stupid in some ways), but idk. It's comfortable because it's familiar and bc my words aren’t being directed at any one person. Sorry this is really long, btw.
I feel like I've talked about sexuality so much the past year or so, and I feel like I've taken so long, like...longer than a lot of people...to fully unravel things about myself. My teens were reserved for me barely scratching the surface of anything bc I was petrified of it and had zero exposure to anything that would have helped me in any way. My twenties were like, the first stage of my actual exploration and unfurling, where I was like...wait...this is a viable option? Other people are like this...I'm meeting people who understand. Does that mean I could let myself have that option too? But I still went on like no...no. I'm basically meant to live someone else's life and not seek out any further answers. The past five years I did seek out more answers and really did a lot of work, and that's like...still quite a long time to sort through some of this (or at least, it feels that way).
All of that is just history now though, so it’s not actually what I want to discuss. The thing that I don't feel good about is how my emotions have felt wrt everything currently. I've started to feel like such a bitter person for it, but I don't know if, in some way, the things I feel are justified after years of trying to understand my relationship to the world at large and how my sexuality relates to it. I want to believe that they are and that I'm just at a stage where I can experience these emotions fully in ways I haven’t before and that eventually they'll start to mellow out.
For instance, the past couple of years I've started to become somewhat like…irrationally irritated when it comes to hearing about boyfriends/husbands/etc of my friends who are cis women. Sometimes in general, but mostly when it's in the context of someone complaining about their partner in a day-to-day sort of way. The normalization of that in a heteronormative society has started to become something I just…really dislike hearing about. After going through my own “straight-passing” relationships (idk if this term is ok to use and I’ll change it if not), I almost feel like I just don't have the time or care for it anymore, even when I want to be supportive. Also, it’s hard for me to not apply my own experiences and biases, and a part of me always ends up wanting to be like. If you aren't happy, please try and do something to fix it. Converse with your partner about it. Leave if it's bad enough that you can't deal with it anymore. Get a therapist for yourself or both of you to work things out. Idk. It feels unfair for me to be like that when family or friends want to vent, but I also find it so hard to deal with now or like, it sends my brain to the boomer comic “I hate my wife but I’m just going to complain and not doing anything to change it” realm (and I understand that a lot of times, it is the partner who has little interest in changing things even when the other person is trying, which is even more frustrating to some extent).
The other thing I feel guilty about is this disdain I've developed of hearing about cis male celebrities/characters/crushes in more heterosexual regards (I want to specify that this doesn’t mean I actively dislike the celebs or characters or anything like that, not usually anyway. There are a ton of male chars I enjoy and everything, and tbh idc that much about celebrities in general). I feel like for the past few years I've been going through a period where I'm so tired of being exposed to it though (even with my own chars being sexualized by other ppl tbh) and all I want to do is to engage in media/culture that somehow dismantles anything cisheteronormative or that focuses on couples that aren’t cis/straight (I’ve esp sought out so much more wlw-adjacent media in recent years bc I’ve found myself connecting to it in a way that’s like…holy shit I want to make up for years of things I didn’t have access to or didn’t know existed).
Unfortunately, sometimes I feel like talking about that more often leads to a level of anger or annoyance on the part of people who don't feel that way, even though there is so much less media and discussion about those things in general. A lot of this is more relevant to irl straight friends I have and stuff, where it's fine for them to talk about all of the things they like when it relates to men or romance centered around men, but I don't necessarily have the same ability/level of acceptance from them to discuss media focused on anything else wrt romance/sexuality. Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of queer friends and whatnot, but most of them live elsewhere now (I also live elsewhere from many of them) and in general, the majority of people I'm exposed to in regular life are usually straight bc statistically that's just how it is and everything. It frustrates me though how it feels so acceptable for them to talk about whatever male celebrity/char or straight romance thing is popular, but I just kind of have to stand there and nod while wishing I could talk about the stuff I like too when it comes to like, wlw/lesbian media or whatever. That sounds selfish, but I feel like it reflects society’s general view on anything queer, and I think that’s why it gets to me more. Like maybe it wouldn’t bother me so much if that wasn’t the default/if I could speak about things as freely too. I know a lot of people feel that way, I don’t mean to make that or any of this post sound like some experience that is unique to me.
Anyway. I'm sorry if this vent comes off as weird or abrasive at all. It's really, really not my intention, nor is it directed at any one person or relationship and is more just a reflection on how my emotions are now when I think about cisheternormative society and that kind of thing. In the past I was able to kind of...blind myself to a lot of it, I think, or at least be more jokey about it in the times when it did annoy me. And after the years of working to distance myself from it, these aspects of it have started to seem really pervasive, even more so than I felt they were before. Like I said, I don't feel good about feeling these things and I don't want to always feel them. I hope I can work through them and get to a place where they don't bother me, or at least, not as much as now. I truly think it's a situation of like…breaking free of my own binds/feeling this freedom now and seeing things in a different light than I was able to before when I had the blinders on, and maybe once I settle into myself more, I’ll be able to shake those emotions off or find better ways to cope with them. I feel like a lot of this is stuff that’s always existed and always will, and the ways in which society operates are very hard to change, but I can kind of adapt the way I see and experience things so that they’re healthier for me. I’m just. Still in the early stages of doing that, and maybe it will take a little time to understand how to make it more productive/easier for myself. I didn’t get to this place overnight, and I’m sure I have a lot more to learn on this particular journey.
#by bug#sexuality#this is a long vent so im sorry about that if you read it#idk I don’t want this to feel personal to anyone bc it truly isn’t#it’s more just me reflecting in a space I feel ok doing that#and I promise it’s primarily about society and sexuality as a whole instead of people as individuals#even though I mention irl friendships I don’t want these things to reflect negatively on them#they just like what they like and that’s okay#this is more just me trying to gauge where I’m at with my emotions and somehow writing them out makes that easier#it’s also. im not happy with myself for experiencing these emotions but I want to change how I react to them when having them
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i think that if we dig all the way down to the roots of tøp's musical theme, it all comes down to that constant internal conflict between desperately wanting to be seen and desperately wanting to stay hidden. we can see how they've been making gradual progress in "managing the tension" but it's still there on Clancy. dare i say it's the central theme of the lore as well.. the reason the character & the era Clancy feels so rebellious is because he's actively fighting to Be Seen. the oscillation continues, but a subversive variable has emerged.
#also i dont wanna make assumptions or be an intrusive creep but#i think its safe to assume that#tyler has been fighting this battle since he was a kid and he still is#based on the stuff he's said so far and the lyrics of course#and that fucking aches my heart because i get it im going thru it as well#i dont mean to say i get him 100% because that impossible but#i resonate with the lyrics he wrote sooo much it sometimes scare me even#like snap back......... it i s so s ad#and i know what that oddly specific melancholic euphoria they were tryna go for is#when i fully absorb that song#but at the same time the progress he and josh have made is so conspicuous too#it makes me cry from joy and relief#because while the steps may have seemed too small to make a difference#theyve come a long way to achieve this betterment#and it gives me/us/them hope that things will get even better in the future#why am i ranting and venting?? idk#i got sentimental while thinking too hard about their lyrics lol#anyways. thanks for coming if you read the tags this far#tøp#twenty one pilots#clancy#tyler joseph#josh dun#sorry for the typos i dodnt proofread
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i know this has been said 473773474833 times by the kavetham/haikaveh shippers and probably even nonshippers, but i'll say it again. I finally finished the genshin summer event and did the little after quest in sumeru and.....every time kaveh is sneaking around trying not to be noticed coming out of alhaithams house it's just such a gay vibe. he's basically screaming "I can't be caught being gay in a homophobic society!" even if that's not what the game writers are *actually* saying. that's just how it comes off and they can't make it come off any other way. with hoyo's gay history, it makes me wonder if it's on purpose and all a cover-up to have a technically different reason for it so they can get away with it lmao but we will never know.
#lee text#genshins#i can acknowledge how gay they are without liking thr ship#flashback to several kavetham/haikaveh (whatevwr their ship name is) shippers on here attacking me over not liking the ship#trying to “educate” me on why theyre sk gay and why i should ship it#look i didnt say they arent gay af. and these shippers dismissed my feelings completely#i think it was after that one event with the competition thing that kaveh won? idk but just they way they interacted#the way alhaitham talked to kaveh and the way kaveh responded TRIGGERED A TRAUMA RESPONSE IN ME#which made me dislike the ship and their dynamic! i didnt CARE if he was well meaning. the way he talked to kaveh#triggered a fight or flight response in me because it sounded similar to how ive been talked to and kaveh getting upset was similar to#how ive reacted to the same words. you can also argue my family cares about me like alhaitham does kaveh and its how he helps#but it doesnt mean its the kind of help we need and it doenst traumatize us lmao#so i dont get why people were so angry at me for getting triggered by this ship and disliking it for that reason#while i can still admit that they are gay af and seem to get a long a bit better after that and i can tolerate them now#since its been a while and i dont remember it enough to have a trauma response when seeing them anymore lmao#but its just annoying that shippers can be so toxic 💀 they care more about their fictional men ship than me. a real person. weird#not tagging the ship so i dont get more angry shippers in my notes....but they found me last time with no tags so hi. dont yell at me again!#but maybe no one will care since im putting my “anti ship propaganda” in the tags this time and not the main post lmao#just dont read my tags so you dont get mad at me for being uncomfortable by this ship dynamic. but if youre reading this...its too late#leave me alone they arent real and i am so im more important right 😅#let me shame the shippers that dismissed my real feelings because they think their ship is more important than a real person lmao#you cant tell me im wrong when a trauma response isnt a choice and happens against your will 💀#BE ASHAMED YOU NERDS#I WILL BITE YOUR KNEECAPS#sorry i just had to vent lmao
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yknow at this point i have drawn so many images i can draw pretty fast now. i think that's the best outcome after years of tormenting over how slow of an artist i was. mainly bc i really had no idea what i was doing, so i would spend HOURS on just a full-body character design or something of the like. of course all the practice and time spent studying anatomy or color makes things easy now (also obsession but we already know about all that)
i think its hard to learn that not all your art is precious and by that i mean of course u cant create masterpieces in a day and shouldnt torment over not being able to get something right the first time. the silly doodles all count towards something. i joke about having perpetual wips but i think my favorite thing is saving past ideas and reworking them later just to see how they changed. bc art, like people, is so dynamic. constantly changing.
and the best feeling is making the art u imagined years ago come to life or you get a bit closer to producing the work that you saw in your head. mmmmm growth.
#i think it took years of pain and frustration and i still feel uneasy about my art but i aim to improve always so i think thats a good thing#like these days i dont really care about quality or what the people will like. i just draw whatever idea and post for funsies#and i want to be able to do that for a long time 😭#all my vent post are about art bc i dont wanna be too personal online LOL but I FEEL BAD I JUST HAVE A SERIOUS CASE OF IMPOSTER SYNDROME#SORRY#but yea i read every tag and the essay length ones always make me happy like thank you. <3 for simply looking at my art. it means a lot#im at a weird part of my life sorry if i get all sentimental and wistful i just. woa. art 🧍♂️
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I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said “there there buddy” like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
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#>ooc.#// vent-ish#[[just found out my paper is probably going to get a 0 because i didnt use the sources i was supposed to. its a 1.5k long paper. i have a 3#day work weekend and its due on the 12th. i dont have time to fix everything#so ij ust sucked it up and submitted it. part ofm e says 'you should drop out' but its too late#i was going to write but i read the requirements and it just. sucked the life out of me#so im going to go to bed#take a melatonin maybe. id like to vent about this to my friendgroup but they arent college students and arent receptive when i complain#about school so i thought it was just best to put this here instead. i dont want to do this anymore im tired#who am i kidding they arent receptive when i complain or vent period#do i need new friends#i dont know#delete later#im sorry. i just needed to put this somwehere
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yknow i've mentioned before that chelly is very capable of being violent and explosive. however the most ever angry i've ever drawn her is mildly upset. plus there was the memey-ish thing with chelly literally begging chip to let her bite maim kill people for him.
i kinda wanna draw chelly completely snapping. chelly getting a little too silly.
#cell screams#cw vent#//<- just incase lol#//fun fact that horse toon ive mentioned a few times? sam bucus? yeah he's based on my actual childhood bully#//this might start looking like a vent from here-on and will get violent so little warning if you keep reading these tags#//but yeah since my actual bully ruined my childhood and social development and never apologized i feel a lot of hatred as u can see.#//and since actually getting revenge on the real guy is both illegal and a total waste of my time im just going to take out said rage#//on the toon version of said guy. is that deranged? maybe. at least im self aware about it idk lol#//i am very close to just drawing chelly killing bucus or something idfk.#//but i am not wasting time trying to hunt down some asshole brat who definitely played a big part in me being so fucked up today#//bc like. he had a chance to apologize senior year. then when a friend told him to apologize he fuckin vanishes into thin air never to be#//seen again until graduation night. so in my opinion i think he didnt regret anything and wasnt sorry.#//which sucks bc in my traumatized rage i definitely said some fucked up shit to him too as a kid and would've apologized as well.#//but there was a chance for closure. i tried to find him too to try and get that closure but no. there never will be closure. its over now#//so instead im going to unleash a teeny tiny portion of my bottled up decades long rage and hatred#//on an anthropomorphic purple horse. :)#//besides sam bucus did more fucked up things to chelly than my irl bully since bucus is a culmination of EVERYTHING thats#//fucked me up in life whether it be mental machinations; intrusive thoughts or things that actually happened#//so while perhaps my real bully doesnt deserve death; SAM BUCUS SURE DOES AND HE'S GONNA GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#// :)#//sorry for my violent rambling i got it out of my system now thanks for reading my weird bullshit lmao
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i have so many things i want to do on here!! oh my goddddd!!! i want to be unapologetically me! i just get so nervous and i fear like im being too much on here !!!!!
like!!! i want to post silly incorrect quote stuff on here :( and talk about my selfships and silly fandoms i love .... and my silly self insert that makes me so happy ... and post MORE AND MORE AND MORE BUT IM SO NERVOUSSSSSSSSS
it makes no sense !!!!! i mean i guess it does..... having someone who kind of puts you down all the time for the things you share with them makes you terrified to do literally anything and thats actually sooooooooo frustrating.......... wahhhhh
besides ........ i really wanna do something for my birthday blargh!! >_<
#ok sorry everyone i just needed to get this OUT#im no longer friends with that person which is good! but they still are THERE haunting my thoughts all the time#i dont like venting about the SAME THINGS OVER AND OVER AGAIN I REALLY DONT#but this time i dont think i can just Not#like i just.....#they were not supportive at all even if they said they were#they were supportive when it benefited them#i dont like talking about them but this is how im trying to process how horrific and traumatic that friendship probably was.......#theres always a part of me that thinks im the worst person ever because of them its so bad idk#i wish i didnt feel like this sometimes.......#but in a good way: i can be a bit happy on selfshipping without feeling as if im a laughing stock to them#i dont think they even read anything i sent them in regards to literally anything#selfship or not#try not to talk about personal stuff almost at all i try to never speak about Me ever because i feel overbearing and a lot#but i just feel bad i guess...#in all honesty though: yall are so sweet and i appreciate every single one of you !!!#i just can never articulate my thoughts correctly#and i feel too afraid to show things because of how things were in the past :(#but i really do appreciate everything i just ...#im not good at talking about Me ... like i said previously i think#i think though a good thing is finally being able to enjoy the things i like even if its kind of semi public so i think thats a huge step!!#i just.... feel too much. i feel things too intensely....#maybe i should write things on paper instead of typing things out#idk... uh thinking out loud here sorry#rambling but um i think i got everything out ?? idk :thumbsup:#but i do mean it though: thank you for being nice and patient with me ^_^#i know my fear gets in the way and im trying TO FIGHT IT#going to PUNCH FEAR going to attack fear with hammers#this is so long i apologise ........#ashley talks
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#I'm goint to vent a bit#so sorry if someone is reading#im just warning bc i read that about the antidepressants and it made me feel a certain type of way#and i hadnt talk about this with other that my best friend#but i dont really like talking about depression and my ex with her so here it goes#sometimes it still shocks me how much I just wanted to learn things to be able to take care of my ex#lo learn things to be able to tell her and that she could take care of herself#and she was she is so f sturborn and when she started to take antidepressants#she was honestly believing that she would be fine and that all her problems would be fix#bc doctors dont actually tell you things that matter or explain how things work#and she never listened to me and i was so worried all the time#and honestly nine months its a really long time to feel ignored by your partner#by someone you love and deeply care#but anyway#that post was really helpful#even if that information is now only for me#it still sucks so much how things ended and im so mad and disappointed#and sometimes im so worried#but its not my place anymore#and it never was#she never wanted me to do anything#so thats pretty frustrating
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literally black king Emma was so fucking good. we were robbed. Like on the one hand they should have let Matt Rosenberg cook but on the other hand. the really brutal Ruth death and rahne trans panic murder were a lot 💀
Oh you’re so so right — the mutant metaphor suffers from cis white writers, but I remember people calling it trauma porn like there’s no narrative purpose for there being a massive death count overall, and I'm like… mmmmmMmm.
Personal preference rambles as a found family heavy angst enjoyer (this is not a defense of Rosenburg X-Men), but in a general sense I really like when — so they might not get along, but they got each other, because as life keeps gloating it's hell to fight supremacy when you're fighting each other (not that causes of divisions amongst marginalized people are unimportant, but if you don't have your people, no one else will, this is how I feel; also not that anyone is obligated to loyalty towards a specific individual that harms them) — Hope shooting Scott in the head isn't fine, but what binds them is more important than grudges. Logan finally leaving his MCU-esque Post Credits Scene Era to be with Scott! The way Black King Emma (!!!) will stoop to any low as she manipulates Scott into doing what she wants, but she is trying to protect him, she worries when he's shot, and when the perceived advantage of their separation ends, she just welcomes them all into the Hellfire Club?? It's just cathartic for me.
There are some very significant caveats in this run that I only hope I remember well enough to speak on… The Morlocks deserved better, eons before anti-mutant hate got to that level, and between Jono and Dani's roles — the X-Men having overlooked the way it's always godawful for the most marginalized among them before it was quite this godawful for all of them, the hypocrisy, it could've been explored better here with less focus on Scott and Logan. Like in Sabretooth and the Exiles, sort of, but not entirely…
(I think sometimes this works better with side books. The Simonson New Mutants run is debatably my fav and overhated in my opinion.)
Yeah, Rosenburg X-Men is very flawed, and it's extremely valid not to be into it when you hold the same energy for Krakoa's flaws, but overall (for me) it really nailed the tension and the stakes and the angst and I was extremely hooked, especially with Age of X-Men meanwhile making choices in the other books.
(I might be misremembering a bunch, too, I literally just reread my college essay from almost exactly 5 years ago to try and remind me! I was low-key exaggerating in those tags where I called it a paper, it was a 3-page one-week essay with two sources which were Rosenburg UXM and the textbook. I also re-skimmed the Ruth death issue…)
…okay one more thing also I can't lie I was heavy into David/Ruth at the time and I read that issue like three times that week it dropped, I'm not about to say it she wasn't fridged for the purpose of setting up how bad it's about to get, nor that the interesting shit it did with her powers didn't literally just mirror the excuse to write out Destiny in a very concerning pattern, but at least the story was about Ruth's pain rather than that of those left behind (which is very different from, say, the focus being on Peter Parker's pain when Ms Marvel last died; and also very different from Rahne's death, which is the worst of the run)— anyway in 2019 I was just so happy to see Ruth again after that wildly OOC Legion series that didn't mention her while David was also being a plot device in Age of X-Men (which I didn't love). I had pretty much lost hope that my X-Men Legacy babies would ever be relevant again, so it was a win for me. Not as big as Way of X, but the bar was on the floor. That said a content warning was so needed to be at the beginning instead of a fucking suicide hotline at the end.
But the Rahne trans panic murder, god. Masterclass in taking the mutant metaphor to depict the most brutal things to happen to real marginalized people (without bothering to represent them?) and it goes grossly exploitative so quick. The way X-Men's lack of sensitivity readers shows…
ANYWAYS I haven't read it in years please take my opinions with a grain of salt.
#words by seaweed#im not tagging characters for fear of I have bad opinions T-T#sorry for the slow response!! ty for the ask your an amazing writer btw#suicide#transphobia#genocide#also the “trauma porn” allegations may be different if it lasted as long as the Decimation era- did ppl say that about new x-men?#idk I wasn't reading at the time I only know how it was remembered (Rosenberg era being barely remembered lol)#I just think the Rosenburg X-Men is underrated by haters (not you)#the “haters” being the same people who took until current events to acknowledge the Zionist parallels in the Krakoa era#I took this moment to vent about the “If you don’t support Krakoa I don’t trust you” white gay dominated twitter threads from the Hox#love your “parts were good and parts were bad” take. very true. in my opinion also. even if some of our opinions diverge.#tbh for me I don't really get bothered when my favs die *if* the fav actually has a death that is focused on by the plot#and not just a throwaway death. as a lot of deaths in the Rosenberg run were!!#you know#I think I loved the M-Pox era for the same reasons (in addition to the disability aspect which works so well for X-Men)#it was less extreme which helped it work for a longer period of time. and it was way more varied / diverse books#m-pox was great
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・❥・ mr scarletella headcanons
{ who doesn't love a tall 8ft ghost dressed in all red thats a huge creep? i know i do!!! }
ᡣ𐭩 -he's unnaturally flexible. considering he's a ghost, he can bend and twist in ways that could kill a normal person.
(ive heard people say he doesnt have joints, either)
ᡣ𐭩 -knows everything about you. your favorite show, how you're feeling, everything. scarletella uses this against you sometimes. not necessarily in a negative light, but considering they dont know the meaning of boundaries, he's a little bitch sometimes.
ᡣ𐭩 -after the scarlet rain ending, he'd do literally anything you ask. clean up for you, kill some person thats blocking the way, the list goes on.
ᡣ𐭩 -extremely jealous. you cant convince me that he wouldnt start like vibrating with anger the moment he sees you speaking to another guy, bonus if its another human. i like to think he killed mr. human because of that.
ᡣ𐭩 -adding onto the jealousy topic— mr scarletella doesn't get too jealous of the other monsters. its more and less with some. more so to mr crawling, less to mr chopped.
ᡣ𐭩 -knows what you're doing all. the. time. its like a sixth sense (did i use that right) for him. he knows who you're with and what room you're in. that scene when you're hiding in the vent? he didnt call you out for funsies. too lazy.
ᡣ𐭩 -we all know mr crawling is like a dog— but i think the same about mr scarletella. he'll secretly follow you around everywhere. even if you dont know he's there, he is.
ᡣ𐭩 -very big stalker vibes, although if you're doing something requiring privacy (ex; showering, changing, restroom) he leaves you to it. oddly, when you're done doing those things, you immediately feel a pair of eyes on you again.
{ me after not writing for MONTHS to come back and write about some otome game i paid 14 dollars for
all jokes aside if you're reading this im SOOO sorry for being gone for so long and btw if u followed me for jjk content im sorry again......i'll try and post jjk again but huys im so inconsistent with my fandoms its horrendous. BUT TAKE THIS!!!! :D }
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So have an odd request for the L&DS men but bear with me. I'm kind of in a grieving process rn bc I just suddenly lost someone I love. MC also grieves in the main story so I request some comfort drabbles about the L&DS men consoling you while grieving if that's ok.
Consoling You While You Grieve- The Love And DeepSpace Men
parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre: comfort a/n: hi lovely, i'm so sorry for your loss. i know i may not have the perfect words right now, but im here for you. if you ever need to talk, vent, or just have someone to listen, don't hesitate to reach out. take all the time you need, and remember that you don't have to go through this alone. sending you all the strength and love during this difficult time ♡ ̆̈ and that also applies to anyone that is also going through a tough time right now! any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
Xavier:
Once you told Xavier, he would hold you tightly. The type of hug that is comforting and the one that feels like he’s never going to let you go and that everything is going to be okay. He’s a good listener, never interrupting you, and offering his best advice as much as he could. If you needed some fresh air, he’d take you for a walk, holding your hand.
All Xavier knew is that he needed to be there for you no matter what and he didn't leave your side for a second. He’ll show up unannounced with favorite snacks, food, or distractions. He’ll bring in some new plushies he got from the claw machine to bring some comfort. He’ll bring some board games or new movies you both can do to distract you and he’ll wrap you both in a blanket.
All Xavier knew is that he needed to be there for you, never leaving your side. He’d show up unannounced with your favorite snacks, comforting food, or anything to distract you. He’d bring new plushies from the claw machine for extra comfort, board games, or new movies to keep you occupied. And he’d make sure you were both wrapped up in a cozy blanket.
He lets you cry for as long as you need, whether it took hours or more. He didn’t mind at all. You could stay in his arms or on his lap while you let it all out. He wanted to be someone you could lean on during this tough time.
He lets you cry for as long as you needed even if it were hours, he did not care. He’ll let you stay in his arms or his lap while you let it all out. He’ll be and want to be someone you can lean on during this tough time.
Zayne:
He would pull you into a comforting hug the moment you tell him what happened, placing his chin on your head as he rubs comforting circles on your back. He lets you cry it out as you sob into his torso.
He can tell you weren’t okay no matter how many times you told him. He can read you a little too well from the expression on your face.
He’ll do anything and everything he can to make sure you’re okay. He’ll come to your place unannounced almost every day, bringing your favorite takeout and bakery treats to make sure you’re eating well. He’ll stay and eat with you and sometimes he’ll even feed it to you to make sure you are full.
He'll let you cry it out all you want and he'll brush off any stray tears that came running down randomly. He'll make sure you drink enough water so you stay hydrated during this time.
He’ll make sure you’re getting some rest even though it might be difficult too during this time. When you are in deep sleep, he’ll slip out of bed to wash your dishes or tidy up any parts of the house to help you around a bit. He'll slip back into bed with you, enveloping you in a embrace so you don't wake up alone.
He is a good listener and he’ll do his best to comfort you whether through his actions or through his words. He’ll understand that you would want some space and he’ll respect that but he will check up on you once in a while to make sure you’re okay.
Rafayel:
He knows what loss is like and he knows it too well and that's something he would never wanted you to encounter.
He'll hold you the way he's always wanted to be held when no one was there for him. He cradled you in his arms, your head nested in the crook of his neck as you sobbed quietly.
He'll understand and accept any reaction that you had whether it was crying or feeling like you were numb or any anger. He doesn't take any of them personally but rather he was understanding. He'll try his best to distract you with things by taking you anywhere that would cheer you up.
He'll take you to the beach that might offer a temporary escape from your grief or doing some light activities with him.
He'll do whatever it takes to cheer you up even if suggest going to a cat cafe. He'll hide away his pout and scared expression so you weren't worried about him.
If you were comfortable with it, he'll help you find a way to honor or remember the person you've lost. He'll try his best to create a portrait or he'll help you make a collage that shares their stories or memories you had with that person.
Sylus:
He is immediately beside you, uttering sweet words that were dripping like honey as you cry into his chest. He brushes away your tears and help you calm down with his soothing voice, offering you advice and reminders. He would have no complaints that of the stains of tears on his clothes.
He'll always be right by your side, whether that means holding you in his arms or keeping your hands interlocked.
He encourages you often to lean literally and figuratively lean on him. He'll be your rock through this entire your process. He'd let you talk about it no matter how many times you have repeated it to him. He'll listen and listen and he'll talk about it with you.
He doesn't let you out of his sight. Like Mephisto is always watching you through your window and will notify Sylus if you weren't taking care of yourself properly. If he was away on business, he'll arrange for food to be delivered to you. When he was available, he'll call you to make sure you were doing alright.
If you have trouble sleeping, he'll hold you close and softly hum until you relax against him and drift off. Once you wake up, he'll still be beside you, until you're ready to get up. He'll join you in your self-care routine, even if it meant wearing those silly headbands, to help you maintain it and ensure you don't neglect your health.
#xavier x reader#xavier x you#xavier x y/n#zayne x reader#zayne x you#zayne x y/n#rafayel x reader#rafayel x you#rafayel x y/n#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus x y/n#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#xavier lads#zayne lads#rafayel lads#sylus lads#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace fic#love and deepspace scenarios#lads x reader#lads x you#lads x y/n
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Even more and more of obvious shit I point out because I want an excuse to rant while not interacting with actual people in real life who also like this show because I'm masking 😍💜💜
BARELY STARTED AND BRO. YOU JUST LET HER DO THAT TO YOU, ME PERSONALLY-
HE'S PETTING KEE-KEE I LOVE HIM SMM
HER HOOVES. I LOVE IT. NOT LIKE THAT, IM JUST A FURRY-
*grabs pen*
ANGRY CHARLIE FOR THE WIN. I LOVE WHEN THE HAPPY CHARACTER GETS ANGSTY (Cough. Luz. Cough).
The people writing fanfics where she gets FURIOUS. Omg. That was something I read. I LOVE MY FELLOW FANFIC WRITERS BUT OH MY- YALL REALLY HAD CHARLIE M A D.
"Uh-"
I love his reaction lmao look at his goofy face.
HER BOW BECAME HORNS (my "redesign" is now 100% worse)
SAD VAGGIE. THE BOW. DROOPY.
Oh and the angel dust fellow back there 🤯
I LOVE ROSIE SO MUCH HUH
Tall.
No explanation needed. <3
PLEASE HELP???
CUTIE PATOOTIE. I LOVE HER SM UGGHHH
CHARLIE HATES OLD PEOPLE COMFIRMED YAY 😍😍💅💅
Hot
That's it.
IN SYNC. I LOVE THIS SONG AND THE ENTIRE SCENE. WHY IS IT RANKED SO LOW WITH SOME OF YALL?? Okay well-
I thought this song was gonna be a Charlie and Vaggie duet- tbh I still preferred that BUT I LOVE CARMILLA SO I KINDA DONT CARE.
BUT I WAS ROBBED OF AN ACTUAL FULL CHAGGIE DUET (REPRISE DOESNT COUNT) IF H*SKERDUST GETS A FULL ONE WHY CAN'T CHAGGIE? *SOB* uhh anyway-
Is that. Like. How she thinks actually 😰
I know there's been a lot of the lack of Vaggie's self-worth, which I wish was explored into more. I just think the Vaggie(3rd) episode just wasn't needed at all if it didn't even have an impact. Don't get me started on that episode, it was rushed, too early to have character arcs already, and overall not needed or even should have existed periodt.
I hope they explore it next season because GOD this woman needs TO LOVE HERSELF. OR ATLEAST CARE ABOUT HERSELF LIKE????
SWEET MAMA PLEASE. TAKE ME IN YOUR WINGS AAAAAAAAA
Charlie, sharing is caring <3
Out of all the people I thought Charlie would vent to I didn't think it would be ROSIE. It's a nice surprise tho I love her <3
bisexuality.
That's it.
HE'S DANCING. ALASTOR IS DANCING. THEY ARE SLAYING BESTIES. THE MAN IS DANCING. HELP.
Season 2 is going to be Charlie in her villain era and Alastor's reputation era 😍
I LOVE VAGGIE'S FACE. PRECIOUS BABY UGHH... THEN THE WINGS REPLACE THE BOW AND DROOP UGGHH I HOPE IN SEASON 2 WE SEE MORE OF HER WINGS. OR CUT HER HAIR SHORT SO WE CAN HAVE IT ALL THE TIME. Also so Husk and Vaggie can bond over both having wings. Sorry I love their potential friendship so much. AND LUCIFER AND VAGGIE TOO!! BOTH BEING FALLEN ANGELS OMG. UGH THE POTENTIAL OF VAGGIE'S RELATIONSHIPS WITH NOT JUST CHARLIE ARE SO GOOD AND I HAVE BEEN ROBBED OF SEEING HER AS AN ACTUALLY MORE FLESHED OUT CHARACTER. I AM SCREAMING AAAAAAAA.
I can't say how much I love them. It's too much. I cant- yay the teaser image before the show came out <3 they are so fucking adorable. UGH SOME1 END ME
Charlie loves the wings hehehe. Vaggie looks nervous about it. It's probably a reminder to her about when she used to be an exterminator. The healing from everything will take a long time but hopefully Charlie will be there for her the entire time. And vice versa
Ayo- 😰
CHARLIE. T H E PRECIOUS BABY.
Uh next one tomorrow cuz yeah 🤯
#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin hotel vaggie#hazbin charlie#hazbin vaggie#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel sir pentious#hazbin angel dust#hazbin hotel husk#hazbin hotel angel dust#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel niffty#chaggie#rainbowmoth#varlie#vaggie x charlie#charlie x vaggie#charlie morningstar#vaggatha
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Big old PSA, if you are in the Ask Blog Community
IK ITS LONG PLEASE READ ANYWAY!
As of late our little stardew community has become not so little, which is so wonderful! We appreciate every single one of you! We enjoy talking to you guys and interacting in character, so when I say this please don't take it as me saying stop sending us asks or stop interacting with us.
Recently there has been an uptick in the amount of inappropriate asks. I don't mean the outright sexual kind, although that is its own can of worms. I am talking about people coming into our DMS and saying that they want to hurt themselves, that they have already hurt themselves, and or that they are going to hurt themselves. When I say think know I am NOT mad at you. That is totally inappropriate and you need to stop.
We know you just want help, but that is not our job. We are strangers on the internet. We don't know you nor do you know us. I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say we are happy that we have fostered an environment where you feel like you can be open. But, again, You don't know us. We are not trained to help you. We are NOT who you should talk about your issues with. and again it is not our job.
We are people too. We have our own lives and our own issues. Forcing us to take on yours is not ok. I understand where you are coming from, wanting to be heard. I know in your mind that you have this close relationship with the characters we portray so its ok that you vent, but that's not the case. There is a person behind those pixels. And we are uncomfortable. We are just people on the internet not trained professionals.
We see you, we hear you, and we are so sorry that you feel this way. Im going to link a list of hotline numbers from around the world. We care that you are struggling, but we are not equipped to handle that. Please go to someone who can.
Thank you for reading this, and if it applies to you we hope you get better. We are just not the place to talk about it. Stay safe everyone.
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a little ink - C.S
summery - y/n is journaling in bed but chris gets bored of his phone and begins to play around with y/n's stationary.
notes - fluff <33333, chris is so boyfriend, i thought the fandom needed more fluff, short
a/n - hey yall, this is an apology gift because ive been bad on being active and writing so enjoy this lil thing i whipped up.
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i stationed myself on my side of the large bed with a little tray table on top of my bare legs. my shorts barely covered up to my mid thigh so the vent near me was absolutely chilling. i begin to go slowly when i'm trying to write a title for my next page, i began to journal when my boyfriends brother and my therapist recommended it to me, despite how simple matt’s was, I thought i could take it up a notch and make it a little cutesy.
my pencil case was jam packed with highlighters, colourful pens and high quality markers, my concentration stays strict on the page in front of me, i tried to keep my penmanship neat while i'm trying to write something in cursive. a warm hand wraps around my ankles as i look down beside me seeing chris look at me with want in his eyes. “hi chris,” i simply say looking at the boy while i put the cap back onto my brush tip marker.
“hi baby,” he looks up at me with a beaming bright smile, he just radiates good energy and love. he drops his phone beside him now playing a song instead of the various audios from tiktok.
his hand sneaks up into my pencil case grabbing a yellow marker from it. he uncaps it and i feel the light pressure of it press down onto my skin, the yellow marker glides along my scar, he continues to draw past it to make a star out of the previously hurt skin. chris knew i was self conscious about my scars, it was a permanent reminder of the pain i went through in highschool.
he didn’t care though. he continued to draw random doodles on my leg, moving on to my arms where more scars lay hurt, he switched out his marker for a different colour the more he explored. little hearts, stars and chris’ signature riddle my legs and arms, i feel his writing getting a bit faster. It looks like a sentence but i couldn’t quite read it.
i stopped what i was doing a long time ago, now just admiring what he was doing. he was so focused on writing his signature on the larger line of a scar i had on my arm using the line from my body to represent the line through the dollar sign he always made whenever he wrote his name.
he does a very magnificent heart beside his name, filling it in still trying to be very soft on my skin as the ink seeps in. he plants a fulfilling kiss onto the scar now covered in orange ink, he looks up at me with a little bit of a knowing look painted on his face. “im sorry, it was only meant to be a little ink but your scars are beautiful, as is the rest of you.” his finger underlines the sentence imprinted on my skin as he reads it out.
“chris i'm gonna cry oh my gosh. you are so cute, you know that?” i saw trying to hold back a sob.
a chuckle escapes his smiley lips “i love you so much y/n” his lips make contact with the star that started the rest of the pseudo tattoos. i wish i could keep this image in my head forever, because this was a moment too precious to let go of.
taglist - @westwiing13 @comet235 @mayhem73
#sturniolo triplets#syn speaks#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#Spotify
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HEART RACING
Warnings: 8k+ words, bad writing, kissing, relationship started from a bet, slightly ooc vada (idk?) reader has she/her pronouns, ur best friends is kinda a dick ig
A/N: this was highly inspired by shes all that + i'm still kinda on my break, sorry if it seems like im ignoring asks
Summary: You take on a bet from your best friend, but what happens when you start regretting your decision.
"I'm so excited." Jordan, your childhood best friend says, smiling at you. You narrow your eyes at the brunette boy, adjusting your bookbag strap that was slipping off your shoulder. "I wonder what dish your mom is going to make this time." He adds on, that goofy smile of his never leaves his face.
"Yeah." You mumble, trying to hide your nerves about the upcoming break. "Yeah, I hope it's something delicious," you reply, forcing a smile. Jordan reads you like a book, tilting his head before letting out a soft laugh.
"Don't tell me you're worried about your parents bothering you about having a girlfriend." You shake your head, furrowing your eyebrows, as your eyes stay attached to the trail in front of you.
"It's just... this happens every holiday! Oh, Y/N, where's your girlfriend? Oh, Y/N! Who's the lucky girl?" You mock your parents before letting out a sigh and stopping your walk to face Jordan.
"Why can't I just be single and enjoy my high school experience without constantly being questioned about my love life?" you vent, frustration evident in your voice. Jordan raises an eyebrow, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "To be fair, you haven't brought a girl home since freshman year. And you're now a senior. Did you see how happy they were?"
You roll your eyes at Jordan, "What about Ana? I brought her home." Jordan chuckles, shaking his head. "Ana doesn't count. You faked a relationship, and your parents read right through it. They know you too well."
You sigh, memories of that awkward dinner with Ana and your parents flooding back. "Yeah, that was a disaster. I guess I just wanted to avoid the constant interrogation for a while." Jordan smirks. "Maybe it's time you actually find someone worth bringing home."
"Yeah, sure. It wouldn't be hard to, I just need someone to be able to play the part. My parents do not care who I date whatsoever, just as long as I'm dating them." You tell him, scratching your eyebrow.
Jordan raises an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "You wanna bet on it?" You raise an eyebrow in response, curious about what Jordan has in mind. "What kind of bet are we talking about here?"
"I pick the girl, and you have to bring her home to meet your parents on Christmas," Jordan says, a smirk playing on his lips. "And if you succeed, I'll do your math homework for the rest of the year."
You eye Jordan before holding out your hand. "Deal." Jordan's smile widens as he shakes your hand. "Let's go find your lover." You laugh, following Jordan as the two of you start scanning the school for potential candidates.
"What about her?" You ask Jordan, nodding your head in the direction of a girl blowing bubbles. Jordan glances over at the girl blowing bubbles and raises an eyebrow. "Hmm, she seems carefree and fun-loving. Definitely a possibility," he teases. "But no!"
You continue searching, your eyes landing on a girl sitting alone in the library, engrossed in a book. "What about her?" you suggest to Jordan, pointing her out. Jordan observes her for a moment before responding, "Too boring."
"Ohhh, maybe her!" Jordan laughs loudly, pointing at a girl picking out her wedgie. You chuckle at Jordan's suggestion, but quickly shake your head. "I don't think so," you say, trying to stifle your laughter. "Let's keep looking."
"Hey! I'm the one picking here. I have the go-to." You shake your head. "Then pick."
Just as you say that a girl trips on her own shoelaces and stumbles forward, nearly falling face-first, Jordan bursts into laughter. "I think we have a winner!" You look over at the girl, who searches around to see if anyone has seen her embarrassing moment. She quickly regains her composure and brushes off the incident, pretending like nothing happened.
"Vada Cavell?" You yell at Jordan, "You've gotta be joking, man." Jordan chuckles and shrugs. "Hey, you said to pick. And she definitely caught my attention with that little stumble." You roll your eyes, not convinced that this is the best choice for your fake partner.
"Look. Ugly, bad personality, a bit on the smelly side, I can handle." You glance back at Vada, sighing.
"But I draw the line at someone who can't even walk without tripping over their own feet," you say, exasperated. Jordan laughs again, defending his choice. "A bet is a bet!" You open your mouth to argue again, but Jordan beats you.
"Hey, if I were you, I wouldn't be wasting my time. Because according to my calculations, you only have about four weeks to turn her into your perfect fake partner before Christmas. And if Vada Cavell is going to be that somebody, you've pretty much got your work cut off for you. "
You sigh and reluctantly agree, knowing that you can't back out of the bet now. You walk over to Vada Cavell, who is sitting with a blonde-haired girl at a table, engrossed in her phone.
"Hi, Vada. You got a second?" You ask, trying to sound casual as you approach her. Vada looks up from her phone with a hint of curiosity in her eyes. Mia, the blonde-haired girl, drops her jaw at the sight of you. You send her a small smile.
"Hi, Mia. I saw your soccer video on Instagram. "It was really impressive," you compliment, trying to make small talk. Vada raises an eyebrow, while Mia blushes. "You watch my videos?"
"You don't play soccer." Vada states matter-of-factly, glaring at her best friend. Mia looks sheepish, realizing your mistake. "Oh, sorry." You tell Mia who quickly brushes off the comment with a dismissive wave.
"So, Vada, listen," you begin, trying to redirect the conversation. "I was wondering maybe if you wanna..." Vada quickly stands up, interrupting you. "Let's go, Mia."
Mia gives you an apologetic smile before following Vada, leaving you feeling slightly embarrassed and rejected. You sigh, realizing that your attempt to ask Vada out didn't go as planned. "...embarrass me horribly in front of all these people?" You finish trailing off to yourself. You look back at Jordan, who's bending over, trying to stop himself from laughing so hard.
With a tight-lipped smile, you send him the finger, knowing that he's enjoying your embarrassment a little too much.
-
This was a bet, and you needed to win it. It wasn't like you were failing any of your classes, but you were tired of all the math homework Mr. Smith kept assigning. Plus, you'd love to see the defeated look on Jordan's face after Vada, and you successfully convinced your parents you found yourself a girlfriend.
In order to win this bet, you had to text Mia through Instagram direct messages and ask her where you could find Vada after school. Mia sent you a screenshot of Vada's Find My Phone, showing her location in a downtown park. You knew this was your chance to prove Jordan wrong and finally have some peace from Mr. Smith's math assignments.
Vada's eyes widen as she sees you walking closer to her, regardless, you send her your charming smile, which she doesn't reciprocate. "You know stalking is illegal in all 50 states, right?" Vada says, her voice laced with caution.
You quickly assure her that you were just trying to find her so you could talk. "I apologize if it seemed like stalking, but I genuinely wanted to have a conversation with you," you explain, hoping to ease her concerns.
"I'm not smart." Vada admits her eyes never leave yours. "What?" You breathe out a laugh, confused. "What? You think that I can tutor you or something?" Vada continues, a hint of vulnerability in her voice. "You're probably thinking, Oh, there's Vada, she dresses like a hippie—"
"Vada."
"—Barely has any friends."
"Vada."
"—She must at least be smart." You cut her off gently, placing a hand on her arm. "Vada, I have the fourth highest GPA in our grade." Vada looks at you with surprise evident in her eyes. "Really?" she asks, her voice filled with disbelief.
"Yes, really," you reply reassuringly. "It's true." You slightly jump at the sudden voice. Turning around, you see Vada's other best friend, Nick, sitting a few feet away.
"So what do you want? Is this some sort of dork outreach program?" Vada asks, rolling her eyes. "No, Vada," you say calmly, trying to hide your frustration. "I just wanted to hang out."
Vada raises an eyebrow, skeptical of your intentions. "Just hang out? With us?" she questions, her tone still laced with doubt. You nod, hoping to convince her that you genuinely want to enjoy their company. "Yeah, I thought it would be fun to get to know some new people," you explain, hoping she'll give you a chance.
"Sure, me and Vada were about to go to this stand-up comedy club. You can have my ticket if you want." Nick shrugs, ignoring the confused glare from his best friend.
Vada looks at Nick in surprise, clearly not expecting him to offer his ticket. "Really? You're giving up your ticket for her?" she asks, very confused. Nick shrugs again, flashing a grin while he holds out his ticket for you.
You take the ticket with a grateful smile, "Thank you, Nick. Are you sure? I could just buy my own if you want to go too." Nick shakes his head, "Nah, I've gotta go study for my presentation anyway." His phone chimes right after, and he quickly checks it, confirming his need to leave.
"Well, have fun at the club! Let me know how it goes," he says before hurriedly walking away. You watch him go, feeling a mix of gratitude and curiosity about why he would give up his ticket for you.
You send Vada a smile, "I guess I'm your plus one tonight." Vada narrows her eyes at you, still confused about why you, one of the most popular students in school, is so fascinated with her. "I'm still confused about why you're putting on this act. Are you trying to impress someone, or is there another reason behind it?"
You furrow your eyebrows, letting out a small laugh. "Are you always this skeptical? I assure you, there's no ulterior motive. I simply wanted to enjoy your company and spend the evening with you." Vada's expression softens slightly, but she still seems hesitant.
"Well, we should get going." Vada mumbles, brushing a small strand of hair behind her ear.
You follow Vada down the slightly busy streets, neon lights illuminating the sidewalks as people bustle by. You can't help but notice Vada's occasional glances in your direction, her guarded demeanor slowly melting away.
"I like your jewelry." It's unique and really suits your style," you comment, trying to ease the tension. Vada's face lights up with a genuine smile as she thanks you for the compliment.
"Do you always wear that letterman jacket? You look like you came straight out of a 90s movie." Vada says, laughing softly. "Oh, are you going to be an act too for this stand-up comedy thing?" You ask, joking.
"But, yeah, it's kind of my signature look," you reply with a chuckle. "I've always been drawn to that vintage aesthetic." Vada nods, her curiosity evident as she asks, "So, what other things inspire your style?"
"I don't know... I normally thrift a lot of my clothes," you admit. "Whether it's someone's old band t-shirt or their grandpa's old sweater, I love finding unique pieces. I also take inspiration from old photographs and films, especially from the 60s and 70s."
Vada smiles, clearly intrigued by your explanation. "I'm not a huge fashion before myself, but I don't know, I just like to be comfortable." You glance down at Vada's baggy attire, noticing the loose-fitting jeans and oversized hoodie.
"I totally get that," you reply. "Comfort is definitely important, and there's no right or wrong way to express yourself through fashion. It's all about finding what makes you feel good." Vada nods in agreement, playing with the drawstring on her hoodie.
-
There's an awkward silence as the comedian fails to deliver the punchline of his joke. Vada laughs in her own hand, trying not to be too loud. You can't help but smile as you glance at the shorter girl, confused. You lean into her ear, "I'm so confused. How was that funny?"
Vada chuckles and whispers back, "It wasn't. It was funny how no one was laughing." You glance around the room before laughing a bit yourself. She was right. Seeing the confused looks on everyone's faces made the situation even more amusing. It was as if the entire audience collectively missed the punchline.
You begin laughing even harder, unable to contain your amusement. The more you think about it, the funnier it becomes. Vada joins in on your laughter, hiding her face behind her hand as tears of laughter stream down her face.
"Why are you laughing, huh? You think it's easy to stand up here and try and do something you love?" The male comedian asks you, obviously upset that you're laughing at his expense. You quickly compose yourself, glancing at Vada, whose eyes are wide as she smiles, trying not to laugh again.
You raise your hand, trying to apologize for the misunderstanding, but the comedian interrupts you. "Well, if you think it's so easy, why don't you come up here and give it a shot?" he challenges, pointing towards the stage.
You shake your head with a tiny smile on your lips. "Come on, come up here." You squint your eyes as a light begins to shine on you from the stage. The audience starts cheering and encouraging you to take the comedian's challenge.
You look at Vada, "Go!" She says this, smiling as she pushes you from your seat. Reluctantly, you take a deep breath and make your way towards the stage, your heart beating in your chest. The comedian hands you the microphone with a smug look on his face.
Your shaky hands take the microphone, "Uh..." Your voice trembles as you try to gather your thoughts. You glance at an audience member who has a gutair strapped around their shoulder, and a lightbulb goes off in your head. "I'm not a comedian, but I can try and entertain you all another way."
With a nervous smile, you motion towards the audience member with the guitar, saying, "Can I borrow that for a second?" The audience member hesitates for a moment, but then nods and hands you the guitar. You place the microphone on its stand before stepping forward and strumming a few chords to test the sound.
"Something bad is bout' to happen to me. Why I feel this way, I don't know, baby." You sing with a raspy voice, closing your eyes and letting the music take over.
The crowd falls silent, captivated by the raw emotion in your performance. Vada is shocked, her eyes widening as she watches you on stage. She had no idea you could sing.
"I think of her so much it drives me crazy. I just don't want her to leave me."
You continue to sing Steve Lacy's iconic lyrics, pouring your heart out on stage. You hit the high notes, sending chills down the spines of everyone in the audience. This was much better than the comedy act they were just witnessing.
When you finish the song, Vada's the first one standing up and clapping, with others soon following. You open your eyes to see the crowd on their feet, their applause echoing through the venue. The look of surprise and admiration on Vada's face is priceless, and you can't help but smile broadly.
You push open the door to leave the club and are immediately greeted by a rush of cool night air. "That was so awesome! Just like...going up there and performing in front of all those people, it's such a rush," you exclaim, your eyes still shining with excitement.
Vada nods, her dimples deepening as she grins. "I never expected you to be such a natural on stage. It's like you were born to perform," she says, her voice filled with genuine admiration.
The two of you stop walking as you reach the edge of the sidewalk, taking a moment to catch your breath and let the adrenaline settle. The city lights twinkle above you, casting a magical glow on the vibrant streets below.
You glance over to Vada, and she glances back at you with a faint smile playing on her lips. "You hungry?" You ask, gesturing towards a nearby food truck. The tantalizing aroma of sizzling street food fills the air, making your stomach growl in response. Vada's eyes light up at the suggestion, and she nods eagerly, her excitement matching your own.
-
Vada smiles, her hair blowing in the wind due to the drop-top on your convertible. It's been three weeks since the comedy club, but the memory of that night still brings a smile to your face. The chemistry between you and Vada is undeniable, and you can't help but wonder what other adventures await the two of you.
Kali Uchis blasts through your speakers, filling the car with her soulful melodies. The warm sun kisses your skin as you drive along the scenic coastal road, creating the perfect backdrop for a carefree summer day.
You catch a glimpse of Vada through the side mirror, her hair blowing in the wind, and a contagious laugh escaping her lips. The connection between you two feels effortless, as if you've known each other for years.
"I just wanna get high with my lover!" Vada sings along to the lyrics, and you join in, "Veo una muñeca cuando miro en el espejo!"
Vada leans in closer to you, kissing your cheek gently while she sings more of the lyrics. "Kiss, kiss! Looking dolly, I think I might go out tonight. I just wanna ride get high in the moonlight."
The song proceeds to play, and your singing becomes more enthusiastic, matching Vada's energy. You both dance and laugh, completely lost in the moment. Soon, you both arrive at the beach, your phone ringing as you step outside the car.
"Hello?" You answer the phone and hear Jordan's voice on the other end. "Y/N! Where are you? I just stopped by your house, and you weren't there. I wanted to hang out tonight."
Vada waits patiently for you to end the phone call, holding all of your stuff in her hands.
"Oh, I'm uh...I'm not home right now." You mumble into the phone, scratching your nose. "Well, no shit. Where are you?"
"I'm actually at the beach with Vada," you reply, glancing at Vada, who raises an eyebrow curiously. "But maybe we can hang out tomorrow." You can basically hear the grin on Jordan's face.
"The beach, huh? You and Vada have been hanging out nearly every damn day. Don't tell me you're actually enjoying this bet, Y/LN." You chuckle and respond, "Goodbye, Jordan."
You quickly end the call, sending Vada a smile. You take the items from her hands, thankful for her help. As you start setting up your spot on the beach, Vada asks, "So, what did Jordan want?"
"To bother me," you reply with a dismissive wave. "He's always trying to pry into my business." Vada raises an eyebrow, clearly intrigued, but respects your privacy and doesn't press further. A part of you feels bad for becoming friends with Vada under such circumstances. She was a chill and easygoing person, and you found yourself truly enjoying yourself around her.
You couldn't help but wonder if you should tell her about the bet going on between you and Jordan or if you should just end the friendship altogether. It was a difficult decision to make, as you didn't want to risk losing the connection you had with Vada, but at the same time, keeping such a secret felt dishonest.
"Hey, where's the pump for this?" Vada asks, holding up the beach ball you packed with the rest of the beach gear. You smile, grateful for the distraction from your internal dilemma, and point her in the direction of the pump, except it's not there.
"Oh, shit." You frantically search through the beach bag, realizing that you must have forgotten to pack the pump. "Here, I'll just blow into it." You offer, trying to come up with a quick solution. However, as you start blowing into the beach ball, you quickly realize that it's going to take a lot more effort than you anticipated.
You feel yourself getting lightheaded as you continue to blow into the beach ball, desperately trying to inflate it. Vada giggles at your struggle, you send her a playful glare, but her laughter only encourages you to keep going.
"What if we take turns?" Vada suggests, hoping to alleviate some of the strain on you. You gratefully agree, handing her the faintly inflated beach ball. You expect her to wipe off the ball since your mouth was in fact directly on it, but she doesn't seem to mind.
Your heart begins racing. You basically just shared a kiss with Vada, even if it was through a beach ball. The thought of it sends a rush of excitement through your veins.
Vada hands you the ball back, slightly out of breath. You smile, hesitating for a moment before placing your lips on the ball again. After a while, the ball is fully inflated, and you both start tossing it back and forth, laughing and enjoying each other's company.
"Don't let it drop!" Vada yells out, her laughter echoing across the beach. You run as fast as you can, determined to keep the ball in the air. The sand squishes between your toes as you dive to smack it back into the air. The sound of the ball hitting your palm fills the air, creating a rhythmic pattern that matches the beat of your racing heart.
"God, do you play volleyball?" Vada asks, her eyes widening with excitement. You shake your head, catching your breath, and reply, "No, but I guess I could give it a try!"
You smack the ball a bit too hard, and it flies over Vada's head, landing in the sand behind her. She turns around, a playful grin on her face, and says, "I'm definitely not getting that." You chuckle, running over to retrieve the ball. Before you can, someone kicks it away, sending it rolling further down the beach.
"The fuck—" you stop yourself, looking up and noticing Jordan. Jordan, with a mischievous smirk on his face, shrugs and says, "Oops, my bad! Thought I'd give you a challenge."
"What are you doing here?" you ask, slightly annoyed by Jordan's interference. He chuckles and replies, "Just enjoying the beach with my friends."
You look behind him, noticing he's brought company—some of your friends and other people you've hung around with before. They wave at you, smiling and clearly excited to see you. Jordan adds, "We thought it would be fun to have a little gathering here. Hope you don't mind."
You narrow your eyes at your best friend. "You're an asshole. You're only doing this because I told you I was hanging out with Vada here." Jordan raises an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "Come on, don't be like that. It's just a coincidence that you're both here too."
You let out a sigh, realizing that Jordan's actions were most likely intentional. Despite feeling annoyed, you decide to put aside your frustration and make the best of the situation. "Alright, fine. Now go get my beach ball."
Jordan smirks, clearly enjoying the power he holds over you. "Sure thing, but only if you promise to introduce me to Vada later." You roll your eyes, knowing that Jordan's ulterior motives are far from innocent.
You walk over to Vada, plopping down beside her on her towel. She looks up at you with a smile, unaware of the tension between you and Jordan. "Sorry about that. He just invited himself...and everyone else."
Vada smiles, shaking her head. "It's okay. If we're going to be friends, I'd have to meet your other friends anyway." You chuckle, relieved that Vada doesn't seem bothered by Jordan's presence.
You begin unbuttoning your shirt, feeling a bit hot in it, leaving you in your white tank top. Vada glances over at you, her eyes lingering for a moment before she looks away, a faint blush creeping onto her cheeks.
Jordan walks over and throws the beach ball, obviously aiming to hit your face. You quickly catch it, sending your best friend a glare. Jordan lets out a silly laugh, clearly enjoying the playful banter. Vada raises an eyebrow at Jordan's antics, but her smile remains intact as she watches the interaction between the two of you.
"Someone has the guns out." Austin, another one of your friends says, walking toward the group with a mischievous grin. You roll your eyes at his comment, playfully flexing your muscles in response.
"You mean these?" You flex your biceps, exaggerating the muscles for comedic effect. Austin chuckles and nods, teasingly adding, "Yeah, those tiny peashooters." You playfully throw the ball at him, pretending to be offended by his remark.
"Alright, stop showing off in front of the pretty lady." Jordan teases, winking at Vada. Vada's face breaks into confusion, as she wonders if Jordan's comment was meant as a compliment or a joke. She looks at Austin for clarification, who shrugs and smirks, leaving her even more uncertain about the situation.
"Let's play a full game of volleyball," Austin suggests, picking up the beachball that had been thrown at him. Vada eagerly agrees, grateful for the distraction from the awkward tension between Jordan and herself.
You all split into two teams, with Vada and Jordan on one side and Austin and you on the other. Jordan serves the ball with a powerful swing, causing Austin to dive to the sand to make a save.
"Stop trying so hard, bitch!" Austin yells at Jordan with a smile on his lips. Jordan laughs, brushing off the comment with a playful smirk. The friendly banter between them lightens the atmosphere, allowing everyone to relax and enjoy the game even more.
Mid-game, Vada takes off her slightly baggy shirt, which she tied with a knot at the front, revealing her bikini. You notice Jordan staring at Vada, his eyes lingering on her, causing jealousy to rise within you.
You smack the ball against Jordan's head, catching him off guard and breaking his gaze. He glares at you, earning a shrug, as you innocently raise your hands in defense. "You had a bug on your head."
-
You're dropping Vada off at her house after the game when she turns to you with a smile. "Thanks for saving me from Jordan's ogling," she says, playfully nudging your arm. "I owe you one."
You smile, blushing a bit. "You saw that?" You ask, your eye's widening slightly. Vada chuckles and nods, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "Oh, I definitely saw that. You were like my personal superhero swooping in to save the day."
"Well, I couldn't let him make you uncomfortable," you reply, feeling a surge of protectiveness. "I'm always here to look out for you." Vada's smile widens, and she leans in closer. You glance behind her and say, "I could walk you to the door.
Vada blinks and looks at you, her expression softening. "Sure." You quickly get out of the car, making your way to Vada's side. Shoving your hands in your pockets to hide your nerves, you match Vada's pace as you both walk towards her front door. The night air is cool, but the warmth of Vada's presence makes it feel comforting.
"If you want, we could hang out tomorrow?" You ask, hoping to spend more time with Vada. Before she could respond, her front door flies open. A short figure emerges from the doorway, causing both you and Vada to pause. It's Vada's younger sister who greets you with a friendly smile.
"Hey, guys! What are you up to?" she asks, oblivious to the tension in the air.
"Oh my god, Amelia." Vada exclaims, clearly annoyed with her younger sister's interruption. Amelia shrugs innocently, not realizing the impact of her sudden appearance. Vada takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself before addressing the situation.
"Mom! Vada brought a lesbian home!" Amelia shouts, slightly turning her head towards her mother, who is in the next room.
Everyone freezes, unsure of how to react to Amelia's unexpected announcement. Vada's face turns red with embarrassment while you thin out your lips, confused and a bit amused.
Vada's mouth drops. "I am so sorry." She says to you, her voice filled with genuine remorse. You shrug her off while Amelia gasps. "Oh, are you not a lesbian?"
You chuckle, "Um...I do like girls." Before Amelia could press you for more information, Vada's mom appears in the doorway. "What's going on here?" she asks, her voice laced with worry. Vada quickly explains the situation, hoping to diffuse any potential tension.
"I was just dropping Vada off from the beach," you also add, trying to ease any concerns. "We were just having a casual conversation, nothing serious." Vada's mom looks relieved and nods understandingly.
"Well, as long as everyone is okay," she says with a smile. You exchange a grateful glance with Vada, grateful for her mom's understanding.
"Would you like to stay for dinner?" Vada's mom offers, wanting to extend her gratitude for your honesty and reassure you that everything is alright. You glance at Vada, who stares at her mom with a shocked expression. "That would be really nice," you respond, feeling touched by Vada's mom's kindness.
Dinner was fun. Amelia had no filter, which made everything hilarious and entertaining. She shared funny and embarrassing stories of Vada, which Vada tries to interrupt with playful protests. Despite the initial shock, Vada soon joins in on the laughter, realizing that her sister's antics brought out a huge and genuine smile on your face.
There were also serious moments during dinner where Vada's parents questioned you about your future plans and aspirations. They were genuinely interested in your goals and offered advice and support. It was refreshing to have such meaningful conversations with Vada's family, making you feel like a valued member of their circle.
You throw yourself on Vada's bed, falling face first onto the soft pillows. Vada plops on top of your back, laughing at your dramatic entrance. She soon rolls off of you, and you lay on your back, gazing up at the ceiling.
Vada was such a breath of fresh air in your life. Her carefree spirit is infectious, and you can't help but feel happy every single time you're around her.
She has a way of making even the simplest moments feel special, and her laughter is like music to your ears. Being friends with Vada has brought so much joy and light into your life, and you can't imagine what it would be like without her.
Fuck this bet, you think to yourself. Vada's friendship is worth so much more than any silly wager.
"You look deep in thought." Vada's voice interrupts your contemplation, pulling you back to the present moment. "What's on your mind?" she asks, her eyes filled with genuine concern.
You turn your head towards Vada, a small smile forming on your lips. "I was just thinking about how grateful I am to have you as a friend," you say sincerely. "Your friendship means the world to me."
"You're so sappy." Vada mumbles, laughing softly. You break out into a smile. "I'm pouring my heart out here, c'mon!" You tease playfully, putting on an Italian accent.
Vada rolls her eyes, but her smile betrays her amusement. "That was one of the worst Italian accents I've ever heard," she says, chuckling. "But...you mean a lot to me too."
You feel a warm rush of affection as Vada's words sink in. "I'm glad to hear that," you reply, licking your lips. A comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you both bask in the genuine connection and shared vulnerability. Your eyes never leave each other, as if speaking a language that only the two of you understand.
"Is that all?" Vada breaks the silence. "Or is there something else you want to say?"
"Be my girlfriend?" Vada's eyes widen with surprise, and she stares at you. She takes a moment to process your words before responding, "Okay."
-
"I'm even more excited than I was." Jordan smiles, "I can't believe you got away with that." You shake your head at your best friend, an eye roll following.
"No, seriously. You asked her to be your girlfriend, it's barely been a month, and you didn't even kiss her after? Shits crazy."
You put the last plate on the table, "Shut the fuck up, Jordan."
Jordan chuckles, raising his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright, I'll drop it. But seriously, man, you might've won this bet. Still gotta get the parents approval, though."
You let out a sigh, saying, "Maybe we should drop this bet, man." Jordan raises an eyebrow, a mischievous grin forming on his face. "Are you getting cold feet already? Come on, don't tell me you're chickening out now."
You shoot him a glare but can't help but feel a twinge of doubt. "It's just... I don't want to risk ruining our friendship over some stupid bet." Jordan starts to smirk. "Oh shit, you actually caught feeling for her? You can't be serious."
You roll your eyes, trying to brush off Jordan's teasing. "So, what? She's a nice girl, and I don't want to mess things up with this stupid bet about her."
Jordan chuckles, bringing his fist to his mouth. "I can't believe you're actually considering backing out because of a little crush. You've never been one to shy away from a challenge before."
He sighs, adding to his argument. "How about this? If your parents go for it, we'll drop the bet. But if they don't, you have to tell her it was a bet and apologize for any hurt feelings. It's only fair to give her the truth and a chance to decide if she still wants to pursue a relationship with you."
"Fine." You mutter, leaving the room with a heavy sigh.
Vada arrives at your doorstep, a nervous smile on her face. She seems unaware of the bet that has been made and the doubts that have been plaguing you. As you open the door, you can't help but wonder if this could be the start of something real or if it's all just a game that will eventually come crashing down.
You bring Vada into a hug, mumbling into her ear, "I'm glad you're here." Vada returns the hug, sighing contentedly. You pull away, looking into her eyes.
"My dad is in the kitchen." Vada nods, hearing Bad Bunny blaring from the speakers. "Where's your mom?" You begin walking toward the kitchen, "She's in the living room, finishing up the tree. I'll introduce you to her later. Let's go say hi to my dad first." Vada smiles and follows you, playing with her ring as you lead the way.
"Una dominicana que es uva bombón!" Your dad shouts, singing the lyrics. Jordan joins in, singing the next line. "Uva, uva bombón!" You facepalm, shaking your head at their silliness. Vada giggles, clearly amused by their antics.
"Dad!" You shout, trying to regain their attention. "We have a guest here, remember?" Your dad and Jordan finally notice Vada standing there, and their faces light up with surprise and excitement. "Oh wow, who do we have here?" your dad asks, extending his hand towards Vada.
"This is Vada, my girlfriend." You introduce Vada with a smile. Vada returns the gesture, shaking your dad's hand warmly. "Girlfriend? Am I dreaming?" your dad exclaims, a wide grin spreading across his face. "I never thought I'd see the day! It's great to finally meet you, Vada."
You sigh at your father. "Es bonita, mija." You clear your throat, blushing a bit. "Suficiente papá." Your dad chuckles and playfully nudges you. "No need to be shy. I'm just happy to see you happy." Vada smiles warmly at both of you, grateful for the warm welcome.
Your mom walks in, her eyes widening with surprise as she takes in the scene. "Well, well, well," she says with a smirk. "Looks like someone finally found themselves a catch." You roll your eyes at your mom's teasing, but deep down, you appreciate her support and acceptance.
Vada begins talking to your parents while you excuse yourself to speak to Jordan. "Looks like I won the bet." You say with a playful smile, feeling a sense of triumph. Jordan chuckles and shakes his head, admitting defeat.
"Jordan, Y/N, come help me bring out the food." Your mom calls out, breaking the playful banter between you and Jordan. You both exchange amused glances before making your way to help her, Vada also joins, eager to lend a hand.
Jordan is the last to leave the kitchen, hearing your parents talk about Vada. "Crees que es otro truco?" Your dad asks your mom. Jordan leans against the kitchen counter, listening intently to your parents' conversation about Vada. He raises an eyebrow, curious about their suspicions.
"No lo sé, cariño. Parece genuino, no crees?" Your dad shrugs at your mother's question, contemplating the authenticity of Vada's intentions. Jordan rushes out to the dining room, catching you staring at Vada like a lovesick puppy.
"Y/N." Jordan calls out your name, interrupting your daydreaming and bringing you back to reality. You hum, nodding your head at him. "Can I talk to you for a second?" You nod and follow Jordan to a quieter corner of the room.
"I heard your parents talking about how they think this is a trick." He begins to smirk, "Maybe this bet may be mine anyways." You roll your eyes, tired of this stupid bet.
"Whatever bro. I just wanna eat and enjoy dinner without any drama." Jordan chuckles, his smirk fading slightly. "Come on, Y/N. You know it's all in good fun. Besides, it's not like Vada and you are actually gonna last." You raise an eyebrow at him, wondering what he's getting at.
"What do you mean by that?" you ask, leaning in closer to Jordan. "Are you trying to say that Vada and I don't have a real connection?" Jordan shrugs, a sneaky glint in his eyes. "I'm just saying, Y/N, relationships at our age rarely go the distance. But hey, prove me wrong."
You scoff at him, "Sure...whatever you say. Don't be shocked when Vada and I prove you wrong and end up together for the long haul." Jordan raises an eyebrow, his sneaky glint fading slightly. "Well, I guess time will tell," he concedes, a hint of doubt in his voice.
When dinner ends, everyone begins to clean up and put away the dishes. "Have you seen my AirPods anywhere?" you ask Jordan, hoping he might have seen them. "You left them in my car like an entire month ago."
You roll your eyes and playfully nudge him. "Seriously? You couldn't have mentioned that earlier?" Jordan chuckles and shrugs. "I guess I wanted to see how long it would take for you to realize they were missing."
"You're a dickhead."
"Language!" From the kitchen, your mom scolds, reminding you to watch your language. You sheepishly apologize and snatch Jordan's keys from him. He glares at you, pulling at his phone that began ringing in his pocket.
"Wanna get some air?" You ask Vada, gesturing towards the open front door. Vada nods, following behind you as you step outside. "Your parents are nice. They're pretty chill, and your mom is honestly like drop-dead gorgeous."
You chuckle. "Do I have to compete with my mom for your attention now?" Vada laughs and playfully nudges you. "Nah, don't worry. You're more than enough for me."
You walk to Jordan's car, leaning against it as you wait for Vada to join you. "Wanna sit in the car?" You suggest, knowing that it might be more comfortable than standing outside. Vada considers for a moment before agreeing, "Sure, why not? It's a bit chilly out here." You both settle into the car, leaning back in the back leather seats.
Silence falls between you as you take in the peacefulness of the moment.
You look over at Vada, a soft smile playing on your lips. Vada turns her head to you before sitting up in her seat, leaning forward slightly. Her eyes fall to your lips, staring at them intently.
Without thinking, she leans in closer, capturing your lips with a gentle yet passionate kiss. The warmth of her touch sends a shiver down your spine, and you find yourself lost in the moment, forgetting about the chilly weather outside.
The kiss begins to deepen as Vada's hands slide up to cup your face, pulling you even closer. You find yourself melting against her lips, savoring the taste of her soft, sweet breath.
You pull away, breathless and hot, your heart racing as you lock eyes with Vada. "Can I turn on the A/C?" You mutter to the freckled-faced girl. Vada chuckles but nods regardless.
You put the key in the ignition and start the car, the engine purring to life. The cool air from the A/C quickly fills the car, providing a refreshing contrast to the heated moment that just transpired.
You bring Vada into another kiss, more passionate and urgent than before. The intensity between you both grows as you explore each other's mouths, losing yourselves in the heat of the moment. Your hand is tangled in Vada's hair, pulling her closer to you if that were possible.
"Y/N's still doing that bet with Vada?" You recognize that voice, it was Austin. You pull away from Vada, your eyes falling on Jordan's car screen, confirming he was on the phone with Austin. It must've connected to the car automatically, allowing Austin's voice to fill the car.
You quickly release Vada and feel a rush of embarrassment wash over you. You exchange a nervous glance with Vada, hoping Austin doesn't go in detail about the bet you've been participating in.
"It's silly, really. This all started because she didn't wanna do her math homework? So she decided to start dating baby Adam Sandler and introduce her to her parents? That's pretty fucked up. If I were Vada, I'd be pissed."
You close your eyes, taking a deep breath to steady your racing heart. The weight of Austin's words hangs heavy in the air. You hope that Vada understands that it was all just a silly game and that she won't hold it against you.
"Is he serious? A bet? Am I a bet to you?" You feel a knot forming in your stomach as Vada's voice trembles with hurt and disbelief. The realization hits you like a ton of bricks, and you quickly shake your head, desperately trying to find the right words to explain yourself.
"Am I a fucking bet to you?" Vada's voice cracks with anger, and tears well up in her eyes. The pain in her words cuts deep, leaving you speechless and filled with regret. You reach out to touch her arm, hoping to convey your sincerity and remorse, but the damage may already be done.
Vada pushes away your arm, opening the car door and slamming it shut behind her. Her actions speak louder than words, and you watch helplessly as she walks away, leaving you to grapple with the consequences of your thoughtless words.
Jordan rushes to the driver's side of the door, out of breath. "Did she hear?" Jordan asks, panting as he rests his hand on the car door. The worry in his eyes mirrors your own as you shake your head, uncertain of how to fix the mess you've made. "She did."
-
It's been two days, and you've called Vada's phone and sent multiple texts, but there's been no response. The silence only amplifies your guilt and regret as you desperately hope for a chance to apologize and make things right.
You decide to call her house phone, surprised when someone answers. "Mrs. Cavell?" You ask on the phone, hoping to speak with Vada's mother. "It's Amelia, asshole. Don't call again."
You're bewildered by the harsh response from Amelia. You never expected her to be so angry and hostile toward you. "Amelia, please. Just put your sister on the phone."
You plead, hoping to reason with Amelia and convince her to let you speak with Vada. However, Amelia's voice remains firm and cold as she refuses your request, leaving you feeling even more desperate and regretful.
"If I buy you $100 worth of slime supplies, will you let me talk to Vada?" you offer, trying to find a compromise. But Amelia's response is immediate and resolute, "No amount of slime supplies will change my mind. Don't contact us again."
"Fine! $200!" you exclaim, desperation creeping into your voice. Amelia stays silent for a moment, finally giving in. "Our parents are out. If you come over, you have ten minutes to speak to her." Relief washes over you as Amelia finally agrees to let you talk to Vada, even if it means spending more money.
With a renewed sense of urgency, you quickly make plans to rush over to their house within the given time frame, hoping that this opportunity will help mend the strained relationship between you and Vada.
You burst through Vada's room, and she jumps up in surprise, her eyes widening as she takes in your unexpected presence. "I'm on limited time by your sister, so I have to make this quick."
You take a deep breath, walking closer to Vada. "I made that bet before I met you, Vada. And spending time with you made me realize that winning that bet was not what was important anymore. What matters to me now is repairing our relationship and showing you how much you mean to me."
Vada's expression softens as she listens, her guard slowly starting to come down. "I never wanted to hurt you, Vada. I want us to start fresh and build something real together."
"What was it for anyway? I mean, what did you end up losing?" Vada asks, her curiosity piqued. You take another step closer before continuing. "I lost a lot of things, Vada. I lost your trust, our connection, and the chance to truly be there for you. But what I gained was the realization that you are the most important person in my life and the one girl that my parents truly approve of."
Vada stands up, playing with the bottom of her shirt. She looks down for a moment, deep in thought, before finally meeting your gaze. "Don't make me sing again." You jokingly mutter, looking down at the shorter girl.
Vada's eyes widen, and a small smile tugs at the corners of her lips. "No, not this time," she says playfully. "But I do expect you to make it up to me in some other way."
You smile, leaning down and lifting Vada's chin with your finger. Vada glances at your lips before looking back up into your eyes. You smirk before closing the distance between you, capturing her lips in a gentle kiss.
Your worries fade away, drowning in the sound of your heart pounding against your ribcage. Vada's arms wrap around your neck, pulling you closer, and you can't help but let out a content sigh against her lips.
As you pull away, Vada's cheeks flush with a rosy hue, and she bites her lip, opening her mouth to speak but is interrupted. "Ten minutes is up. Where's my $200?" Amelia says from Vada's door, holding out her hand expectantly.
Vada pulls away from you, confused. "What is she talking about?" You clear your throat. "I might've...um...made a deal with Amelia so she could let me talk to you."
Vada's eyes widen in surprise as she processes your words. "You paid her to see me?" she asks, laughing. You smile sheepishly, "Well, I wanted to make sure I had a chance to talk to you without any interruptions. It was worth every penny."
Vada's laughter fills the room as she playfully nudges your shoulder, "You're ridiculous, but I'm glad you did."
#tonyspank#wattpad#jenna ortega x reader#reader insert#vada cavell x reader#vada cavell x y/n#vada cavell#vada cavell x you#vada x y/n#vada cavell x fem reader#vada x reader#she’s all that
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