#this fierce feminist is NOT getting attention!!!!

[punksocks]

Astrology Observations No.22: Lilith Edition Pt.2

*just based on my experiences only take what resonates

-Lilith house could show why someone wants to possess and “tame” you :

In 1st you just exude Lilith energy and a lot of mascs see that as a challenge -a challenge they want to feel dominate over (a fool’s fallacy tbh); 2nd your physicality is striking and they want it all to themselves; 3rd your fierce intelligence and academic reputation; 4th your nurturing abilities and how you exude dark femininity but you could be someone who could take care of them; 5th you seem totally wild and carefree and you know how to have fun; 6th your health and your passionate work ethic that make you come across as unstoppable; 7th I thought of that lyric “I’m so indecisive/ you can’t cuff me but I’m wifey” a lot of people see you as someone that will balance them out perfectly; 8th your s*x appeal and how your raw energy seems totally intoxicating; 9th your worldly air and how no one can stop you from speaking your truth; 10th your polarizing but memorable and powerful impact in public- you give off boss babe energy in such an effortless way; 11th how you seem like you have a lot of haters or ride or die friends; 12th your addictive aura and otherworldly untamable energy.

-Lilith conjunct your Lilith in a sex symbols chart could make you feel inspired by their style/attitude - by sign or house placement (A BUNCH of femmes I look up to have Lilith conjunct MC too)

-Lilith in Libra is a strong feminist placement- it’s the way they strive for balance even when it can be seen as taboo (Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has this placement and it’s conjunct her Sun, Mercury, Mars and MC !)

-Lilith in fire signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) tend to be feminists too. (It’s the “there’s no man alive who can tell me what to do” principe in their attitude)

-(light TW) in general I feel like Lilith harsh aspects, and like Lilith in hard signs (Scorpio, Capricorn, etc) and houses (8th, 12th) can make the native wary around men, usually after trusting the wrong one :/ (whatever happened was never your fault and that wrong one was just a a bad guy, I’m sorry)

-Hell I’ve had -dicey- experiences with -not so great guys- so I’ll also note that to a lesser degree it can apply to fixed Lilith signs (Scorpio, Leo, Aquarius, Taurus), and Lilith harshly aspecting 1st/7th/10th and maybe 4th.

-I totally almost got a sugar daddy a lifetime ago lol but I got afraid of getting human trafficked lol and ran off in the opposite direction Lilith square/opposition Asc bby (I’d guess Lilith conjunct, trine, and sextile Asc/2nd/10th would roll with this more easily if they wanted to)

-Said it an 18+ post, but it’s not an adults only observation imo - other girlies with fire/water Lilith placements have guys hit on them when they’re upset? (I used the example of like getting lost and heading to meet my family and an older guy tried to get me to go to his hotel room, but also more recently I -temporarily- lost my wallet and while I was searching in a panic not one but two guys hit on me :x like you’re not helping dude wtf)

-the element/sign of your Lilith can reflect someone’s sort of shadow reactions to you

Lilith in Aries could make a lot of guys compete with you; Lilith in Taurus would have someone try to buy their way into intimacy with you/try to control your finances; Lilith in Gemini would make a lot of people jump to correct you/undermine your intelligence; Lilith in Cancer could have people force you to nurture them in a sort of motherly way; Lilith in Leo could make people compete with you for attention or at worst try to trick you into having kids; Lilith in Virgo could point to people trying to micromanage you and restrict your routines; Lilith in Libra could point to people trying to tarnish your beauty and throw you off balance/force you to balance them out; Lilith in Scorpio can be scary because it points to people trying to force themselves on you/s*xually dominate you or causing your trauma in general; Lilith in Sagittarius could point to people trying to restrict your freedom/force religion on you; Lilith in Capricorn could mean that people try to sabotage your work reputation/public image; Lilith in Aquarius could point to others trying to restrict your uniqueness and trying to dull your outstanding qualities; Lilith in Pisces can point to others trying to get you addicted to substances/attacking you with their negative energy.

(I have Lilith in Leo and now years after I settled down I’ve finally realized that a lot of guys that made jokes about having kids with me and getting me to skip birth control and running off an eloping …we’re not joking) (yikes, bullets dodged)

-Ok bc we live in a society I feel like the constant overarching theme with strong Lilith energy is less that it’s bad when a dude likes you and more that some guys get so into you that they’re obsessed and also hate you but will still do anything to trap you and when men don’t need any incentive to act out, that’s so scary. Like it’s power that cuts both ways.

Now, of my favorite pieces of obscure art as a Lilith girly :0 (Thank you for asking me about this @corvoidea!)

-Zola: a str*pper meets a potential best friend and the chick tries to highkey human traffic her, it’s insane and based off of a true story (the aesthetic and everything are so good too, it’s one of my favorite movies)

-Sanctuary: this movie just came out this year but I love it so much?? It’s about a s*x worker whose main client wants to fire her because he’s about to inherit his dad’s company. And she fights back. Unexpected ending. Sort of a Lilith love story. Really funny through out.

-Paprika: my favorite animated movie? Ever?? It’s about a scientist and her alter ego that moves in and out of dreams, solving people’s subconscious problems. Then the dream tech gets stolen and things go haywire. A visual marvel fr.

-Cabaret: a movie musical about the cabaret scene in 30s Germany through a club singer trying to love to good life as things get darker all around her.

-Chicago: Another great musical all about getting famous from m*rder because of the protagonist’s feminine ways. (so good, the music is just *chef’s kiss* and Queen Latifah is in it!)

-Crazy Ex Girlfriend: a musical comedy tv show, it’s like a fun deconstruction of trying to live like you’re in a romcom. (So it’s really about mental health and all that, and it’s funny!)

And some songs I love:

Girls is all about just vibing and embracing that divine feminine

I got really into feminist punk rock (aka Riot Grrrl) when I was like a tween finding out how I wanted to express myself, I always recommend Sleater Kinney and Bikini Kill. This song is like Madonna vs Wh*re and I love it :

-idek how to explain this song lol but it’s soooooo gooood

The singer from Bikini Kill started a different band that’s also so cool and punky:

Omg this song about dealing with a f*ck boy and bonding over it I love this song:

I love how Junglep*ssy says /Ain’t a damn thing A man think gonna drive me crazy/ (Google these lyrics they’re everything and the song is a vibe):

This is my song for when I was running around with dudes I thought were tolerable enough but not great lol, I literally played this song for my friends once in college and I was like Ah, yes my creed lol (I got nicer, it’s still a fun song) :

The lyrics: /I wanna hold a seance For every heart I’ve broken Put them all in a room And say “get over it”/ and the lyric /And when I first met you I wanted to kiss you And I I wanted to need you And now I’m forgetting why I tried/ (so good):

A song to describe some of the -weird behavior- I’ve caught lol, cathartic to hear tho:

[merwgue]

The Retcon of Nesta Archeron: From Modesty to "Empowerment"?

Let’s talk about the absolute character assassination—sorry, "development"—of Nesta Archeron, shall we? You know, the once-reserved, morally complex, and fiercely loyal older sister who somehow morphed into a character that thinks empowerment means drinking herself into a stupor and sleeping with every available male. Nesta’s original character in A Court of Thorns and Roses (ACOTAR) was someone with nuance, quiet strength, and a genuine sense of duty. And then... A Court of Silver Flames happened, and it was as if Sarah J. Maas decided that being modest, or god forbid, having restraint, just wasn’t feminist enough.

Remember the original Nesta? Let’s go back to the beginning. The cold, aloof, older sister who had her flaws—yes, many of them—but was also deeply protective. Nesta wasn’t easy to love, and she didn’t go out of her way to make herself likable. But she didn’t have to. She had layers. She had depth. In A Court of Thorns and Roses, her protectiveness over Feyre was masked in cruelty, but it was still there, quietly underpinning her actions. She wasn’t trying to be the center of attention, wasn’t jumping into bed with anyone to assert her femininity, wasn’t tearing herself apart for the male gaze.

In fact, Nesta was modest. Not in the sense of being shy, but in a way that signaled self-worth and a sense of boundaries. She had a cold dignity about her—a refusal to be charmed or coerced by men like Tamlin, which made her interesting. She represented a kind of strength that wasn’t loud or flashy, but something rooted in self-control, pride, and quiet resolve. She didn’t need to be sexualized to be powerful. And that was her strength.

But then... Sarah J. Maas apparently thought: “Nope, we can’t have that.” In A Court of Silver Flames, we see an entirely different Nesta. It’s like Maas forgot who this character was and instead rewrote her as someone who needs to hit rock bottom in the most cliché, destructive ways possible. Apparently, for Nesta to heal and "grow," she had to drink her way through Velaris, have casual sex with Cassian like it’s a competitive sport, and alienate herself from everyone around her. Because of course, women can’t be strong unless they burn everything around them to the ground first, right?

It’s honestly a little offensive. The message that Maas seems to be sending is clear: in order for a woman to truly grow and become empowered, she has to become hypersexual, lose all sense of self-respect, and essentially lose control. Nesta’s story could have been one of quiet resilience—she could have healed through introspection, through reconnecting with her values, her family, and herself. But no, instead, we get the "empowerment" arc where Nesta’s modesty and dignity are stripped away, replaced by reckless behavior that we’re supposed to cheer on as part of her "feminist journey."

But here’s the thing: Feminism is about choice. Real empowerment is about a woman having the freedom to define herself on her own terms. Nesta was already a strong, independent woman, but she did it quietly. She didn’t need to become this unrestrained, aggressive, chaotic version of herself to be strong. It’s almost as if Maas didn’t know what to do with a woman who wasn’t expressing her power through sexuality and rebellion.

It’s frustrating because this narrative suggests that modest, reserved women are somehow less empowered, less interesting, less feminist. Nesta’s original character had power in her restraint. She wasn’t throwing herself into anyone’s arms, wasn’t out to prove her worth by how many drinks she could down or how aggressively she could argue. She had a strength that was quiet, simmering beneath the surface, and that’s just as valid as any loud, rebellious display of female power.

But by the time A Court of Silver Flames rolls around, it’s like Maas decided that all of that quiet power, all of Nesta’s restraint, just wasn’t enough. In order to make her "strong," she had to rewrite Nesta as someone who found empowerment through reckless, destructive behavior. The message seems to be: unless you’ve hit rock bottom, unless you’ve drunk yourself into a stupor and slept around, you haven’t truly grown. You haven’t really healed. And that’s absurd.

Let’s talk about the sexualization of Nesta. Why does her "empowerment" arc have to revolve around sex? Feyre’s journey was sexualized in A Court of Mist and Fury too, but Nesta’s descent into casual sex with Cassian is somehow framed as this liberating, freeing act. It’s presented like Nesta needed to throw herself into this intense sexual relationship in order to heal. But the reality is, Nesta didn’t need to have sex to find herself. She didn’t need to drink away her pain or drown her emotions in self-destructive behaviors to be strong.

In fact, her earlier arc proves she didn’t need that at all. The moments when Nesta showed true strength were the moments when she was composed, when she held herself back, when she maintained her boundaries. Her refusal to be charmed by Tamlin, her willingness to defy him for Feyre’s sake, even when it came at personal cost—that was strength. Her coldness was her armor, not because she was weak, but because she valued herself enough not to throw herself at anyone. But instead of building on that character trait, Maas chose to tear it down.

The thing is, Maas didn’t just change Nesta’s personality—she retconned it. She rewrote Nesta to fit this idea of what a "feminist" character is supposed to look like, but it’s a shallow, one-dimensional version of feminism. It’s the kind of "feminism" that thinks sex equals power and that modesty or restraint equals weakness. It’s not real empowerment—it’s just a cliché.

Nesta could have remained the reserved, morally complex woman she was and still been just as powerful. Feminism isn’t about turning every female character into a loud, sexually aggressive rebel. It’s about giving women the space to define themselves on their own terms. Nesta didn’t need to lose herself to find herself, and that’s what makes this retcon so frustrating. Maas had the opportunity to write a story about quiet resilience, about a woman who finds strength in her modesty and her self-control. But instead, we got a story about a woman who had to lose everything—including her dignity—before she was allowed to heal.

At the end of the day, Nesta’s transformation isn’t real growth. It’s just a shallow attempt to fit her into a mold of what SJM thinks is "feminist"—and it’s a mold that doesn’t allow for real complexity or depth. Instead of letting Nesta grow in a way that honored her original character, Maas rewrote her into someone unrecognizable. And that’s not empowerment—it’s just bad writing.

[justforbooks]

The Elements of Marie Curie by Dava Sobel

A fresh and feminist study of the pioneering Nobel laureate reveals her impact on the women she mentored and set on the path to prominence

Marie Curie carried out some of her most pathbreaking work under an actual glass ceiling and the toxic particles that swirled beneath it eventually killed her. What Dava Sobel wants to convey to us in this unabashedly feminist account of the great woman’s life is that the metaphorical glass ceiling was just as toxic to the society over which it was clamped.

Each occasion the two-time Nobel laureate had a new advance to announce to the world, she had to beg a male colleague to present it to France’s scientific academy, which barred women from its ranks. This iron-clad rule outlived Curie, hobbling her daughter Irène – another Nobel laureate – in her turn, and by the time a woman was finally granted full membership, in 1979, not only were both Marie and Irène more famous than most of the men who had blocked them, but that first female member gave her affiliation as the “Pierre and Marie Curie University”, Paris.

The academy couldn’t even claim that Marie was riding on her husband’s coat-tails, since Pierre had died tragically early in their marriage and she went on to great things – including a second Nobel prize – alone. A true scientist, she was never really alone, though. There were individual men – Pierre first among them – who recognised her brilliance and whose support for her never faltered. The physicist Paul Langevin, briefly her lover once she had been widowed, remained loyal long after the affair and accompanying scandal had fizzled out. That much we knew. What wasn’t so well known, and which Sobel brings out in her new biography, is that Curie created her own school and that many of those she mentored and set on the path to prominence were women. Each of those women inspired many others, in a radioactive cascade that would have lit up one of Irène’s cherished cloud chambers.

These were, necessarily, unconventional careers – and all the more inspiring for that. It’s hard to imagine a young woman arriving in France or any western country today, as Marie Skłodowska did in 1891, penniless, lacking a university degree, barely speaking the local lingo and going on to win a Nobel prize just over a decade later – and credit must go to the institutions and individuals who made that possible. There were women who passed through the Curie lab whose discoveries were feted around the world before they had obtained their baccalaureate, let alone a PhD. These “laboratory daughters” were fiercely loyal to Curie, and when her real daughter showed intellectual promise, she assembled a version of the “flying university” that she had benefited from in her youth in Russian-occupied Warsaw to help realise that promise. Irène was home schooled by some of the most respected thinkers of their generation. This is how scientific dynasties are born.

There were enough holes in the periodic table in the early 20th century to keep Curie in the lab for several lifetimes, but she didn’t hesitate to step outside it when the world called. The first world war having created a demand for mobile X-ray units, she built the units and learned to drive, then enlisted the ever-willing Irène as her aide-de-camp. If the book has a fault, it’s that the world doesn’t get the same attention to detail as Dmitri Mendeleev’s brilliant ordering of the elements. In the spring of 1919, the Curies’ otherwise healthy second daughter, Ève, came down with double pneumonia, aged 14. Sobel doesn’t mention that this happened against the backdrop of a flu pandemic – a disaster that claimed many more lives than the war.

Overall, though, her short and well-paced book succeeds in dispelling the dust that clings to some accounts of this most famous of lives and makes it fresh again. Her explanations of the science allow the reader to grasp how one experiment led logically to the next in the search for radioactive elements and particles, and to puzzle or rejoice with the scientists as the results come in. Their thirst for knowledge might have come close to an addiction, because even after they knew how toxic their workspace was, they were drawn ineluctably back into it.

They paid the price. We knew that too, but perhaps not to what extent. In an appendix entitled The Radioactivists, Sobel provides potted biographies of the dramatis personae. It’s shocking how many died of the effects of radiation exposure – effects that were sometimes recognised at the time, sometimes only later – and of course they weren’t the only ones. But then there were the countless others whose lives were saved or prolonged thanks to Curie’s discoveries – as well as the discoveries of the many women (and some men) who, but for her, would never have seen the inside of a lab.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

Katara comforts Aang when he found gyasto dead and lost appa =momtara /emotional labor aang is obviously an abuser

Mai not comforting Zuko in awakening in a way that makes him happy =abusive girlfriend she should have comforted zuko better, because she can totally get rid of his guilt over iroh and katara could do it better.. despite us its toxic how she has she to comfort aang

Zutaras: having logic and not having double standards , not possible

And don't forget:

Katara always speaking her mind even when people think she's wrong/obnoxious/stupid for it, going against Pakku for saying what she can or cannot be, and not letting Zuko get away with being a dick to her or others: Girlboss! Feminist icon! Deserved so much better than the (perfectly happy) ending she got in canon!

Mai always speaking her mind even people think she's wrong/obnoxious/stupid for it, resenting her parents and Azula for saying what she can or cannot be, and not letting Zuko get away with being a dick to her or others: What a selfish, petty, self-centered, ignorant, cold-hearted, sociopathic bitch! Can't believe the show let her get away with this shit!

Katara showing compassion and empathy for Zuko and offering to heal his scar even after he spent months chasing her and her friends around the world, with the explicit intention of capturing one of said friends and keep him hostage forever/kill him, and to help his nation continue to oppress the rest of the world: Such a kind, wise character! Such a lovely, meaningful moment!

Mai saving Zuko's life even after he broke up with her through a letter because he was one of the few people that liked her for who she was/would not abuse his power over her like Azula does: God, what a pathetic loser that throws her whole life away for a guy.

Kataang and Maiko PDA: Obnoxious, forced and stupid.

Zuko tying Katara to a tree/Katara touching Zuko's scar with the explicit intention of healing it, nothing more than that: such a hot/tender, intimate moments that show how much chemistry these two characters have!

Zuko getting violent and snapping at Mai because some guy she did not even pay attention to seemed to be into her, then trying to make a move on her after she literally shouted "LEAVE ME ALONE!": How dare MAI be such a bad girlfriend! Zuko deserves better!

Aang kissing Katara after she said she isn't sure how she feels, immediately regreting it: What an entitled, abusive creep!

Zuko nearly dying to save Katara's life: The most romantic thing in the world!

Aang giving up absolute power because he had a vision of Katara being captured: Why is he so OBSESSED? This is not romantic!

Zuko choosing to support his imperialist, racist nation that he just heard deeply traumatized Katara by killing her mother: He is madly in love with Katara and fiercely protective of her. Sourse "trust me, bro."

Aang temporarely letting go of Katara because if he doesn't they're all gonna die: See? He doesn't actually care about her! It's all there in the canon!

Katara healing Zuko, saving his life, and him being very grateful to her for it: How beautiful! Best scene of the entire show!

Katara healing Aang, bringing him back from the dead, and him being very greateful to her for it: She's not your personal doctor, you asshole! What an abusive, unequal dynamic!

Zuko not seeming to remember Katara's existence outside of "girl that travels with the Avatar" for 5/6 of the show: Totally doesn't mean he is not in love with her! Why do people call this ship fanon?

Zuko breaking up with Mai because he'll be going on a dangerous mission he felt would not be fair to drag her into, and smiling like a dork just because he got a chance to talk about her: He CLEARLY doesn't love her! Why does anyone like them as a couple?

Zuko needing emotional support very frequently because he is a victim of verbal, psychological and physical abuse: Poor thing! He deserves someone who loves and understands him!

Aang needing emotional support very frequently because nearly everyone he knew and loved died suddenly, he is struggling with survivor's guilt, and now shoulders the burden of needing to save the whole world despite being just a kid: God, what a baby, grow up!

Zuko being an imperialist prince for most of his life and betraying Katara in Ba Sing Se, leading to the death of one of her friends: He is a completely innocent child that indoctrinated into thinking these things were fine! The adults are to blame! Katara really can't hold any of this against him!

Sozin choosing to kill every air-nomad and start a war, and Azulon then choosing to order the raids on the Southern Water Tribes: Does this mean Kya's death was Aang's fault? It think it does. If only this 12-year-old that was not even a fully powered Avatar yet had not freaked out after nearly everyone around him disregarded his wants and needs completely! Such a selfish, awful character that never faces any consequences for anything! How could Katara ever be friends with him, let alone date him?

[all-about-the-tea-parties]

Lessons in chemistry is EVERYTHING I’ve ever wanted from feminist narratives

The covert misogyny is actually covert! The overt misogyny happens after multiple instances of COVERT misogyny!

The main character is experiencing the *actual* experience of Weird Girls. Girls who do not have the social ability to blend, girls who are fiercely independent. Girls who accidentally come to a head with women who were Offering An Olive Branch in the form of “we may be conforming a bit but we’ve quietly created a closed rank safe space for women” but who then reacted to the rejection of that olive branch with hostility and forced conformity bc they interpreted the rejection as coming from a place as Not Like Other Girls-ness and not the simple disinterest in forced conformity

but similarly the Weird Girl does not see the community of the women formed around her! Views them as lacking ambition and determination and not that they’re limited by the culture that they all live and suffer from! Her continued separation from those women is rightly seen as (light) condescension but also unfairly reacted to - Weird Girl should recognise the women around her are limited not lazy, but the women around her should recognise that being Weird Girl does not bring about privilege and specialness bc Weird Girl is obstinate to all forms of control, and eventually the men will react with hostility to the Girl Who Won’t Submit.

The other women resent Weird Girl for getting to be rebellious in ways they feel they’ve been denied, for threatening the delusion they’ve built around themselves, and for seemingly betraying Girl Code. Weird Girl resents the other women for attempting to manipulate her into things she does not want to do, for being inauthentic by conforming to men’s needs, and for seemingly being frivolous.

But we’ve been shown Weird Girls life trajectory - Weird Girl comes to understand the women’s community is her community and that they stand to benefit the most from her, and that they will listen to her with rapt attention and respect - because she respects them.

[mint-8]

Inescapable. No Rules, No Rescue - My version

I saw Viveros's video about this game (Inescapable Is The Worst Game I've Ever Played & I'm Making That Your Problem Now) and I started to brainstorm how this characters could shine or be more interesting, in my opinion.

I came up with these ideas for the characters.

Harrison Finn Tailor

- A British Bus Driver. He is socially awkward yet gentle and polite, something that wouldn't change much depending on the routes. As the days pass by and he interacts with others on the island, he'll get more out of his shell and form friendships with the other contestants.

- He joined the competition so he would be able to move from his shitty home in one of the worst neighborhoods in London.

Maria Strauss

- A German Programmer who works from home to take care of her little siblings. She is bubbly and sociable, the opposite of Harrison, and cares deeply for others as an older sister would.

- She joined the show so she would be able to move out of her abusive household with her little siblings.

Annika Eklund

- A Swedish House Maid. A kind, sweet yet somewhat dumb girl (Think Lindsay from Total Drama). She finds great pleasure in taking care of others and finds most household chores as entertaining and relaxing. She is very strong yet won't use her strength unless absolutely necessary.

- She joined Inescapable so she would have enough funds to sue one of her clients for sexual harassment.

Daan Zoetemelk

- A Dutch Professional Biker Athlete. On the outside, he is very outgoing and positive and somewhat dumb. However, he tends to be very cold and cruel when it comes to anyone standing in his way or interrupting his plans, often thinking of very harsh decisions or solutions to simple problems.

- He joined the competition so he would have enough money to settle a case in which he brutally and 'accidentally' broke both of his competitor's legs who won first place in the last race he was in.

Eva Tamm

- A Estonian Social Media Influencer. She became viral thanks to her meme and since then has been addicted to the spotlight that came with it. She loves being the center of attention (so she won't be 'forgotten'), and it's a complete social butterfly to everyone around her.

- She joined the show, so she'll have enough funds to start her new life as a professional social media influencer.

Francisca Carrasco

- A Portuguese Mechanic. She is a single mother who takes no shits from anybody and is very confident and proud of her job skills. She cares deeply for her family, especially her little daughter, and is fiercely protective of anyone she considers close.

- Joined Inescapable so she would have enough money to provide a better life for her child.

Giovanni Lombardi

- An Italian 'Businessman'. A devoted Catholic who has very progressive ideals and worldviews. He is a passionate feminist, LGBTQ+ ally, and a kind gentleman who would never dare to hurt a fly unless it was for self-defense. He is a loving father and husband to his nuclear family. However, his relationship with the rest of his family is very strained.

- Joined Inescapable to get his family out of poverty after some of his failed 'business' ventures caused his family to fall into debt.

Valérie D'Orléans

- A French Heiress. She is the youngest child and the least possible heir to her family's business empire. Outshined by her talented sisters and brothers, she feels extremely inferior in her family full of geniuses and forces herself to appear confident and proud of her abilities in order to protect herself from other's scorn and ridicule.

- She joined the competition, so she'll become an independent entrepreneur to show her capabilities as a leader and prove to her family that she is a capable woman.

Sasha Smith

- A Hacker and Enginner from an unknown origin? It's difficult to tell whether their words are lies or the truth, for they mastered the art of lying to protect themselves.

- They joined the show to get a new identity after a nasty accident from their last 'gig'.

Lumi Ndiaye

- A Finnish Chemist. She is very introverted and somewhat emotionless. Some of it comes from horrible racism she suffered as a black woman. She is very close to her family and is a very passionate activist for equality of races.

- She joined Inescapable to create a charity to fight against discrimination in Finland.

Isak Ringvold

- A Norwegian Jeweler. Born into an affluent family of professional jewelers and with a natural talent for jewel crafting and design, Isak came to hate his gift due to the extreme pressures from his family and social circles to continue his family's traditions. It's been years since he ran away from his home to partake in his dream for acting in professional plays, for he loves the exaggerated and dramatic personalities he has observed on the very scarce free time he had before he fled.

- He joined the show so he would be able to fund his studies in acting and eventually debut as a professional actor.

[thxnews]

Beyoncé's Reign: A Decade of Dominance

Queen Bey

Say the name "Beyoncé," and instantly, images come to mind of powerful vocals, electrifying dance moves, and a stage presence that commands attention. But who is the woman behind the crown? Let's dive deeper into the private life, career, and future of Beyoncé Knowles-Carter, the multi-hyphenate artist who's redefined what it means to be a superstar.   From Girl's Dream to Destiny's Child Born in Houston, Texas, in 1981, Beyoncé's love for music blossomed early. From singing in church choirs to performing in talent shows, her talent was undeniable. By the age of nine, she formed Destiny's Child with her friends, launching a journey that would propel them to become one of the best-selling girl groups of all time. Hits like "Say My Name" and "Independent Women" cemented their place in pop music history, showcasing Beyoncé's powerful vocals and infectious energy.  

Beyoncé in concert. Photo By Peter Hutchins. Flickr. Solo Stardom and Creative Evolution But Beyoncé wasn't content to stay in the shadows. In 2003, she embarked on a solo career, releasing her debut album, "Dangerously in Love." The album was a smash hit, spawning popular tracks like "Crazy in Love" and "Baby Boy," showcasing her songwriting skills and artistic evolution. From R&B ballads to hip-hop collaborations, Beyoncé proved her versatility, solidifying her status as a force to be reckoned with.   Beyond Music and Building Her Empire Beyoncé's reach extends far beyond music. She's a successful businesswoman, launching her own clothing line, fragrance, and Production Company. Her visual albums, like "Beyoncé" and "Black Is King," push artistic boundaries and explore themes of race, feminism, and empowerment. She's also a vocal advocate for social justice issues, using her platform to fight for equality and inspire change.  

Beyoncé Estádio do Morumbi - SP. Photo By Carolina Mendonça. Flickr.

Love, Marriage, and Motherhood

In 2008, Beyoncé married rapper Jay-Z, forming a power couple that redefined the meaning of celebrity love. They've weathered storms and emerged stronger, raising three beautiful children together. Beyoncé openly celebrates motherhood, showcasing the joys and struggles of raising a family while navigating the demands of her career. This balance between personal and professional life resonates deeply with fans, making her a relatable role model.   100 Million Albums Sold Worldwide! That’s a whole lot of Beyonce! For example, if you laid 100 million tons of beans down on the ground, they’d reach a quarter of the way around the earth. Makes you feel kind of small right!? (As well as a bit hungry!) But well done anyway Beyonce!   She performed at Barack Obama’s Inauguration! An inauguration is when a president gets the official title of president, so it must have been a huge honor for Beyonce to perform there - even more so because Barack Obama was the first Black US President! Beyonce has spoken a lot about how we need to get rid of racism, so nice one! Feels good to be good right?  

Beyonce Mrs. Carter show. Photo By Koeni Ssey. Flickr. Beyoncé, the feminist! She strongly thinks that boys and girls should be given equal chances to live their lives - and that women should be able to do whatever they want with their lives, which isn’t that much to ask right? Beyonce gives lots to charities that support this work, so she's putting her money where her mouth is, good on her we say!   Pride of Place on the Hollywood Walk of Fame! There aren’t many marks of success bigger than that and in 2006 she was invited to put her name down on that famous walk! These fabulous stars are made of brass and set into the floor themselves, but which will last longer, the star of Beyonce’s fame? We think most probably Beyonce!   Beyonce created a stage name called ‘Sasha Fierce’! She says that she did this so that she could keep her stage performer different from who she is as a person at home. It also helps her get over any nerves she has before a show, but she simply goes into ‘Sasha Mode’ - pretty clever!  

Beyonce singing on stage. Photo By Raphael Ribas Lopes. Flickr.

The Ever-Evolving Queen: What's Next?

With each album and project, Beyoncé reinvents herself. Her 2022 single "Break My Soul" marked a return to her house music roots, proving her ability to stay fresh and relevant. So, what does the future hold for the Queen Bey? Whether it's a new album, a world tour, or ventures into filmmaking, one thing's for sure: Beyoncé will continue to push boundaries, entertain millions, and inspire generations to come.  

Beyonce giving. Photo by Neurofibromatosis - Just Ask Foundation. Flickr. Beyond the Glitz and Glamour: Lessons from the Queen Beyoncé's journey is more than just chart-topping hits and sold-out stadiums. It's a testament to hard work, dedication, and the unwavering belief in oneself. Here are some key takeaways from her multifaceted life. Dream big and chase your passions: Beyoncé started young, honing her talent and pursuing her dreams with unwavering conviction. Embrace your individuality: From her powerful vocals to her bold fashion choices, Beyoncé celebrates her unique identity, inspiring others to do the same. Empower yourself and others: Beyoncé uses her platform to advocate for social justice and inspire change, motivating others to find their own voices. Finding a healthy balance: Despite her demanding career, Beyoncé prioritizes her family and personal life, proving that success is multifaceted.   In Conclusion Whether you're a die-hard fan or simply admire her talent and impact, there's no denying Beyoncé's reign continues. As she evolves and pushes boundaries, one thing remains constant: Queen Bey will continue to inspire, entertain, and empower, ensuring her legacy as a cultural icon for generations to come.   Sources: THX News & Wikipedia. Read the full article

[pocket-size-cthulhu]

I'm watching Wednesday on net flicks and I'm generally enjoying it but who would I be if I didn't also gripe about it?

Here are all my gripes (so far) about the Wednesday TV show

Spoilers ahead obviously

1. Character consistency across the franchise & general lack of awareness of who the characters are

So I haven't watched that much Addams family stuff, almost certainly not enough to have these strong of opinions about characterization, but it feels like they missed the point of everyone's characterization. They wanted to make everyone goth without recognizing what actually made them unique and fun, and not just a goth family. Everyone seems so much more... Normal. And it's kind of annoying.

Examples:

Gomez and Morticia are horrified at the idea of either of them being implicated in a murder. I'd think they would be delighted.

The parents want Wednesday to go somewhere where she "fits in" when this has never seemed to bother them before.

Wednesday is almost joyless in this. I don't feel like she was joyless in the other stuff, just that she kept a straight face while doing things she enjoyed - but she did them with a lot of gusto. In this, she's like constantly annoyed.

The idea, if I'm understanding the franchise right, is that these people are extremely goth, have weird interests that they deeply enjoy, are very confident in themselves, and love each other fiercely. Most of that really doesn't come through in this show, for me.

2. Tacky feminism

This show reminds me of Enola Holmes (derogatory). Like it's trying to appeal to a feminist, liberal audience without really understanding what feminism is about. Wednesday is a kind of classic "not like other girls" girl who sees no point in romance or boys and makes little quips about the patriarchy all the time (and also has all the boys vying for her attention all the time for some reason). She's Too Good for all of that, as if being too good for stereotypically feminine activities and interests makes you a feminist/superior. I could see Wednesday not being interested in those things, but painting that as feminist virtue is a mistake.

The most egregious moment for me was when she told Morticia that she didn't want to follow in her footsteps and become a "housewife". ???? How could anybody mistake Morticia for a "housewife (derogatory)"?? This woman lies around the house, does whatever she wants, and has weird sex with her fabulously rich goth obsessed-with-her husband all the time. She doesn't work, she's involved in her community as much as she wants, she has her little hobbies, she can do literally whatever she wants and experiences no downsides to being with Gomez. If she wanted a career or whatever, she could have it. You're gonna call that a housewife?

Not sure if they're going for feminism or queerness there but it feels like the wrong angle.

3. Family dynamics.

This kind of plays off #1. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure in no other media have Gomez and Morticia shown any inclination to control their kids. They always seem to celebrate their individuality and support their interests. Wednesday and Pugsley love their parents and get along with each other. The point is that they are a weird family in perfect harmony with each other. Feels very weird that there would be this level of discord in the family at this point, even with Wednesday growing up as a teenager. I would think her parents would support her interests and that she would feel supported instead of forced to do what they want her to do. I think it would be believable if they gave us more understanding into where the disagreements are coming from, but I have no idea what character-consistent disagreements they could come up with.

(Side note: Wednesday always says she doesn't want to be like her mom, but aside from the housewife thing, it's very unclear what she doesn't want to be like, and what she would rather be like instead. Her goals are unclear.)

4. They named a character "Goody"????

Goody is an honorific that's short for "Goodwife"? And they gave that to a character as a name for some reason?? It's never acknowledged?? The character whose name that is is a child when we meet her (and she is being called "Goody" at that point -she's def not a wife in those scenes)???? Did they not have any like... witch hunt researchers on that team. Or even people who paid attention while reading witch hunt novels, enough to notice that "goody" is an honorific. Or even someone to Google "was goody a name" or "why were so many women named goody in the 1600s" lol. Will they ever explain that????

5. That barista is a slice of wonder bread.

Literally one of the most boring white guy characters I've ever seen. If he's not some kind of villain to justify his boringness, I'm gonna riot.

Also he was like "Wednesday you were giving me Signals! I thought we liked each other!" And... maybe I'm just blind or unsure what this guy is into, but she clearly did Not give him any signals

Anyway. I'm enjoying it mostly but I have to turn my brain off and pretend it's not related to the other Addams family content lol

[mad-rdr]

The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy (The Montague Siblings #2) - Mackenzi Lee

★ ★ ★ ★ ★/5

Another brilliant book with the Montague Siblings, this time with Felicity getting the attention she deserves. I'm so glad both her and Monty decided to take the world on instead of going back to their suffocating home. Felicity aspires to be a doctor and is tired of doors closing in her face. She uses reunites with an old friend, trying to work for said friend's doctor fiancé. Unfortunately, all men are terrible, and he is trying to steal the claim to life saving research. This is a fiercely feminist tale as Felicity not only fights against the gender norms set for her but learns to question her own judgements as well. This is also another great book with queer rep as I'm pretty sure Felicity is canonically on the asexual spectrum!

[uncloseted]

EFFY’S CLOSET WATCHES SKINS: 306 "Naomi"

Surprise! After a 10 month break (sorry, everyone!) I'm back with a new Skins recap. This episode focuses on Naomi, and I know it's a favorite for a lot of you. Apologies in advance if the images disappear- Tumblr added a rule that you can only have 10 images in a text post that I’m trying to get around.

The episode opens on Naomi sleeping in her bedroom. She's still and at peace until... a foot finds its way to her mouth. Naomi sputters on it, and says "Jesus Christ!" Even in her bedroom, which is supposed to be her personal space, she isn't really allowed to just be. "Who the fuck are you?" she says, to which the man responds that he had nowhere to sleep and that Naomi's mum is nice, even if she doesn't believe he's the actual Messiah. Naomi starts complaining (rightly) about how nobody understands privacy anymore, until she realizes that she sleeps naked, and this man is staring at her naked body. She grabs her clothes and storms off in an attempt to find her mother. When she does, we discover that it's none other than Academy Award winner Olivia Coleman (!!!) who does such a great job in this part.

Naomi's mum (I'm pretty sure her name is Gina?) is sitting at the kitchen table, discussing how bananas have an aggressive shape and texture and are "positively patriarchal". Naomi, intent on starting a fight, asks her mother if "anyone has told [her] what a complete fucking cow [she] is", to which her mum replies, "plenty of people", and then asks Naomi if she thinks they should ban bananas from the group shopping list.

I love this scene, because it quickly tells us so many of the things we need to know to understand Naomi. Her mother is a fierce feminist who has a rotating cast of characters living with her at all times and who doesn't really respect her daughter's feelings. Naomi never has any privacy, even in her own house. It starts to make sense why she's so politically active but emotionally closed off. Naomi grabs the banana and takes a giant bite out of it. Olivia Coleman looks wonderfully disturbed by it.

The camera switches to focus on Emily, who is eagerly waiting for Naomi to arrive at school. She looks a little bit nervous and hesitant, but excited. I think in her mind, she and Naomi are at least sort of dating, given that they hooked up at the pajama party and went to the pub quiz night together. Whereas for Naomi, she feels like her whole life is chaotic, and if she lets Emily in, it will only become more chaotic. Like Effy, Naomi is incredibly afraid of getting hurt. She believes that Emily is the one person with the power to ruin her life, and so she’s constantly pushing Emily away.

Naomi appears in the crowd looking disgusted and upset, but Emily doesn't seem to see her, or maybe she's waiting for Naomi to approach her first. I think Emily knows that if she pushes too hard, she'll scare Naomi away, and so she's giving Naomi the opportunity to engage with her on her own terms. Maybe Emily is willing to take it slow, because she knows Naomi likes her as much as she likes Naomi.

Instead, the scene changes once again, this time to Naomi sitting on some bleachers and smoking a cigarette. Kieran, the politics teacher, sits down next to her and inquires as to whether he's late. Naomi assures him that he's not, and anyway, this is hardly an appointment. Naomi doesn't seem to have a dad, at least, not one we see in the show (at least, not yet), and I think she views Kieran as a father figure in her life. He notices her for who she is- someone who's unique and interesting and clever- in a way that I don't think the other adults in Naomi's life do. She's so surrounded by a revolving door of randoms that her mother takes in that Kieran is the only adult who pays attention to her. Kieran inquires about her mum, and Naomi says that "sometimes she's up, and sometimes she's down...fifteen people are living in my house, and none are paying rent." It seems that Naomi's mum is another source of inconsistency in Naomi's life, another person contributing to the chaos that she feels.

"Still, can't be all bad. She made you, didn't she?" Kieran replies, and it feels like the type of thing a dad should say. Naomi looks pleased with this assessment. Unlike her relationship with her mum or with Emily, her friendship with Kieran is easy and uncomplicated. He’s one of the only people who doesn’t add chaos to her life, who just makes her feel better about everything that’s going on. He’s one of the only people who she trusts to just want to be her friend, especially in a world where she views both Cook and Emily as just trying to get into her pants.

The episode continues with everyone gathered in the common area. We see that Thomas is now suddenly a student at Roundview instead of the janitor, which never really gets acknowledged as a plot point. Effy is gazing longingly at Freddie, in a kind of, “what the fuck am I going to do about this situation” way. Freddie’s giving her a look that’s still very much like, “you slept with my best friend after I told you you loved me, what the fuck?” Naomi asks “what’s going on there,” to which Effy quickly replies, “nothing” and then tells Pandora to shut up before she can spill the beans about the fact that Effy Stonem actually has feelings. This interaction is interesting to me, because it means that Effy told Pandora what happened with Freddie. 

Effy turns around to look at Cook, in her customary manner of deflecting her feelings for Freddie by spending time with his best friend, but Cook is surrounded by a group of blonde girls and describing his penis. Effy leaves in somewhat of a huff, I think maybe because Cook isn’t available to help her pretend like she doesn’t have feelings.

Emily enters, having finally found an appropriate moment to talk to Naomi, totally unfazed by the fact that Naomi was maybe ignoring her earlier. Naomi rolls her eyes at Emily. She’s a little bit scared of what it means that Emily is sitting there, a little bit guilty about ignoring Emily earlier, but also secretly a bit pleased. They have a moment of awkward tension before the lights go out. Doug dramatically announces that they’re holding elections for a student president for Roundview, and Emily and Naomi share a look of “what the fuck?”. Emily looks over to Naomi and gives her a little tap on the leg, like, “you should do it,” to which Naomi shakes her head. Kieran is standing in the background, disaffectedly eating a banana.

Emily, not about to give up on the woman she loves, tries to convince Naomi to run for school president, saying that she doesn’t get why Naomi isn’t interested. “You really care about this stuff!…equality, environmentalism, feminism, I don’t ever want to shut my mouth-ism…”. I like how Emily feels she can poke fun at Naomi just a little bit in this moment, since she seems so aware of not pushing Naomi too far in their other interactions. Undeterred by Naomi’s protests, Emily continues to hype her up, “you know about politics, you’re always talking about it!” Naomi deflects with, “Emily. We’ve had about three conversations our entire lives. So the idea that you know I’m always talking about anything is ridiculous.” Emily’s relentless positivity disappears, and she walks away. Cook enters and tells Naomi that she should “see more cock” and that they should “go at it”.

I’ve said this in previous recaps, but I think that up until the end of this episode, Cook was romantically interested in Naomi, not Effy. I think this is his attempt to get Naomi to fall for him. We see him go back and forth between total seriousness and jokes in these interactions, trying to get Naomi to crack a smile. Naomi looks disgusted at the prospect of sleeping with Cook, but then unwittingly makes a bet with Cook that if he can win the student president, she’ll sleep with him. Cook immediately goes to register to run for the election, while Naomi peeks through the door to see if he’s actually doing it. She gets knocked over by Crispin (just Crispin), the other candidate, as he opens the door. Cook comes out after Crispin, and points out that he can “see [Naomi’s] knickers.” Cook reiterates his interest in Naomi, Naomi reiterates her total lack of interest in cock, and walks away, flipping Cook off. I think Cook thinks that Naomi is joking around, the same way he is, to deflect having to admit that she’s interested in him. She is doing that… but to Emily, not Cook.

Kieran offers to give Naomi a ride home, but his car is broken, so they end up walking. Naomi is wearing tights under her dress now, as if she knew she might feel insecure about how short her skirt was or that she might get negative attention, so she prepared for it. Naomi totally trusts Kieran. They have a sweet conversation where Kieran tells her about a time he ran for public office, and then tells her she should run for school president. Again, it’s a very dad thing to do. He believes in her- “you’re the best, we both know it,” to which she bashfully responds, “is that a compliment? Are you complimenting me?” Naomi is not someone who accepts compliments easily, so the fact that she’s willing to take it from Kieran says a lot. Naomi turns to go inside, walks off-screen, and then comes back to sheepishly grab the school president form from Kieran with the smallest little “thanks”. She clearly takes his opinion of her seriously.

Naomi walks into the chaos that’s her house. We get a hilarious interaction between a feminist and the guy who thinks he’s Jesus: “How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? One. Me. Because I’m oppressed, yeah? You’re oppressing me!” “The Messiah does not oppress, ok? He enlightens.” “Yeah? I’ll fucking enlighten you, you patriarchal prick!” Naomi goes to talk to her Mum. Olivia Coleman tries for a nice, non-confrontational interaction with Naomi, but she’s determined to be upset. Naomi’s mum says that it’s “nice to see her with a guy, it’s a nice change,” to which Naomi looks down and smirks, because she knows that she’s gay and in love with Emily, even if she doesn’t want to believe it.

Naomi storms upstairs, saying, “Jesus, is there never any peace?”. That’s really what Naomi wants- an escape from the chaos in her life. The answer to this is no, because Emily is sitting primly on Naomi’s bed, and Emily is the most chaotic factor of all. Emily says that the guy who looks like Jesus let her in, and I’m curious how long she’s been sitting here waiting for Naomi to get home. Naomi is immediately on the defensive. She crosses her arms and asks, “what do you want?”, but Emily is determined not to take the bait. “I wanted to give you this,” she says, and she hands Naomi the school president form. Naomi calls Emily annoying, to which Emily calmly responds, “you seem to inspire it in me.” Emily offers to help with the form, but Naomi says she doesn’t need any help. I think Naomi feels like if she accepts help- from her mum, from the community of people living in her house, from Kieran, from Emily- then she’ll grow to rely on those people and run the risk of losing them later on. She can’t have that, so instead she puts walls up to keep people out from the start.

Emily’s feelings are clearly hurt at this point. She’s trying to hard to be mindful of Naomi’s feelings, to push just enough that Naomi will acknowledge that there’s something between them but not so much that she scares Naomi away, but this time she miscalculated and pushed too far. As much as Emily is trying not to take Naomi’s hesitance to spend any time with her personally, because she knows Naomi does like her, she just needs time, Emily can only be brave and accommodating for so long. She starts to leave, but her hurt feelings get the better of her. She turns around to tell Naomi, “Just so you know, when I see you, my first thought is not: I want to fuck that girl. We’ve kissed. Twice. And it was nice. But it’s also nice just being with you — when you’re not being a prick, that is…You should run for president because I think you’d be good at it. It’s that simple, OK?”

Naomi is a bit shocked, and scared of what this means. This is confirmation that Emily doesn’t just want her sexually, but emotionally, too. Emily wants to be her friend first and foremost. She wants to be someone Naomi can trust. Naomi tells Emily she should stay. Emily immediately takes her up on the offer, because Emily is nothing if not brave, and she flounces back into Naomi’s room. This is something Naomi has been waiting for-and resisting- since she was twelve, and now she’s finally letting it happen.

Emily and Naomi lie on the bedroom floor, head to foot, drinking and joking about different campaign slogans Naomi might adopt. Naomi’s guard is finally down. She’s being giggly and soft and a little bit lame. This is a side of Naomi that we haven’t seen until right now, a side that doesn’t feel like she has to be a sarcastic bitch. Someone who knows that Emily could ruin her life, but trusts that Emily won’t. Someone who knows that sometimes, we can find peace in other people when we can’t create it for ourselves.

“Do you think I can do it?” Naomi asks, and Emily responds, “I think you can do anything.” Emily wholeheartedly believes that Naomi can do anything, that she’s perfect the way that she is, that she’s smart enough and strong enough to make her dreams come true. She believes that it’s okay to try, even if you might fail. And indeed, that’s what Emily is doing in this scene. She doesn’t know how it will work out, but for Emily, it’s better to try being with Naomi than to always wonder what would have happened if she made a move. Naomi is scared of the way that Emily sees her, because she can’t see herself that way. I think she doesn’t want to start relying on Emily for that belief in herself, because what if Emily changes her mind? What if the person Naomi is underneath all that snark isn’t brave or smart or strong? What if Naomi is right about herself, and Emily finds out? Emily makes Naomi feel like a better person, and Naomi doesn’t want to lose that.

But Emily thinks that Naomi can do anything, and in this moment, that’s enough to give Naomi the courage to make the next move. "I’ve been wondering … what do lesbians do? I mean … in bed,” she asks Emily. Emily takes a drink of vodka straight from the bottle, not totally ready to have this conversation, and tells Naomi that she doesn’t know. “Of course” she’s never been with a girl, because Emily has been waiting for Naomi just as long as Naomi’s been waiting for her. Their first time together will be both of their first times. “We just do what we do to ourselves, only to each other, probably slightly more aggressively, and, you know, with …oilz and stuff,” Emily says, and note the pronoun switch. Emily says, “we” as in, her and Naomi. It’s what they’ll do to each other when Naomi is ready. Naomi is wearing a shirt that says, “innocence” here, which I think is telling. Even though she works hard to be a sarcastic bitch, someone who knows everything about everything, she’s innocent and unexperienced in this regard. Their laughing stops, and there’s a moment of tension. Naomi wants to initiate a kiss, but Emily’s not going to let that happen. She promised Naomi that she was there to be her friend, so that’s what she’s going to be.

Naomi wakes up the next morning with Emily in her bed. They’re sleeping back to back, as if they both made a conscious effort not to get too close. Instead of cuddling Emily, Naomi is cuddling the bottle of vodka. She reaches out to touch Emily’s hair, delicately, intimately, as if she can only be so vulnerable when Emily is asleep. She quickly pulls her hand away and mutters to herself, “fuck’s sake”, because she knows she’s let her guard down a little bit too far. Emily snuggles further into the blankets, while Naomi sneaks off to school.

At school, Cook has launched his campaign for school president in the form of a giant Che Guevara type banner with Cook’s face on it. “I think I lost him,” Freddie says. “JJ?” Naomi asks. “Yeah, him too,” Freddie replies. Freddie cares so deeply about Cook. No matter how many times Cook hurts him, Freddie can’t help caring, because Cook is like his brother. He always has been. And it’s hard for Freddie, because he’s angry at Cook about Effy, but mostly, I think he just wants Cook to be okay and it upsets him that he can’t do anything to make that happen. “It should make a difference when someone loves you. Shouldn’t it?” asks Freddie. It should make a difference to Effy that Freddie loves her. But it should also make a difference to Cook that Freddie loves him. And it should also make a difference to their relationship that Effy clearly loves Freddie, too. And it should make a difference for Naomi that Emily loves her. It should prevent her from abandoning this relationship before it starts.

(sorry for the tiny gif but look how cute Emily is!)

Emily catches up to Naomi. Emily’s skirt and bag match Naomi’s top. Emily confronts Naomi, gently but firmly, “you left pretty early.” Naomi deflects, saying that she had things to do, but Emily persists. “I met your mum, she’s nice.” Naomi calls her mum a cliche, but Emily says that she’s a nice cliche. Emily is determined to be positive about Naomi’s life, so that Naomi can see the things she should be positive about, too. Naomi isn’t having it- she’s too afraid that if she sees the positives, they’ll be taken away from her. That if other people see the positives in her life, it only creates a standard she won’t be able to live up to. Naomi starts talking, presumably to dump Emily, but Emily interjects. “I forgot to tell you. I made these in anticipation. Cool, huh? I got the message, Naomi. I’ll manage. But there’s one thing, though. Well, you can’t let him win now, can you?” Emily is being mature about this. She knows that this was big for Naomi, and that it’s okay to back off a little, to not scare Naomi away. She understands Naomi so deeply that she doesn’t feel like she needs to be worried. She’s brave enough to let Naomi go for the moment, because she knows that Naomi is hers, and that she’ll come back.

A campaign montage starts. At lunch, Naomi goes into the cafeteria, hands Emily her bag, and gets up on the table to talk about the issues facing Roundview College. Emily looks up at her proudly, because Naomi is taking charge and going after what she wants. Naomi fails to understand that nobody other than her cares about the issues. Cook interrupts to hand out apples and pears. Naomi calls him a joke, to which Cook responds, “I’m a joke? You’re fucking hilarious!… What’s so good about caring? No-one here cares. We just wanna party!” This is interesting to me, because Cook is fundamentally doing this to try and woo Naomi. But his competitive side takes over so fully that he says things that are ultimately against his end goal (sleeping with Naomi). 

Emily steps in to ask Cook if he could “be a cunt over there, do you think?” And this is a step too far, but Emily just couldn’t help herself. The woman she loves was being mocked. Cook says, “Ah! That’s nice. Getting your girlfriend to hold your hand. Bit of moral support, yeah? Sweet, isn’t it?” And maybe that’s what this is about for him. Cook can tell that Naomi and Emily are getting closer, and he’s angry about it. He knows that he doesn’t have a chance with Naomi, not really, and he can see now that she’s been in love with Emily this whole time. But when Cook can’t have what he wants, he’s determined to make everyone around him miserable, too.

Naomi is clearly upset. This is what she was afraid of- she chased after what she wanted, but she got rejected because she’s not good enough, and the person she loves most get caught in the crossfire. Emily goes to apologize, worried that she’s ruined their fledgling relationship for real this time, but Naomi isn’t having any of Emily’s apologies. Instead, she goes to Kieran, her father figure, for comfort in this confusing situation. Despite her tough exterior, Naomi is vulnerable and sensitive. She just wants someone to make her feel better about everything. And it works for a second. Kieran makes her laugh, and says, “you look so much prettier when you smile.” Naomi says, “I don’t get it. Why are you so nice and all other men are such wankers?” I think she’s hoping he’ll say what a dad would say. He’s nice to her because he cares about her and wants to protect her and thinks she’s the best. Instead, he says, “now you’ve got me,” and tries to kiss her. This is the last thing Naomi wanted. She says, “ugh, you’re old enough to be my dad!”, and that’s the point. She’s upset because he was meant to be her dad but instead he did this. Then she says, “I wanted to trust you.” Naomi is so desperate for someone she can trust without having to worry about how it will impact her. She thought this was the one person who could be that for her, because what else could he be? And so her last safe place, the last person she felt peace with, is gone.

Naomi goes home and cries. For the first time, her bedroom is finally empty. It’s what she wanted at the beginning of the episode. To be alone with her feelings in her bedroom. But that’s not really what she wants anymore. She cries because she thought she had a father figure, but really he was trying to sleep with her the whole time, and because Cook made a joke of her in front of the school, and because her mum doesn’t care about her and there’s a houseful of strangers and because Emily got caught in the crossfire of Cook’s cruelty, and as much as she wants to, Naomi can’t stop wanting to be with Emily. She’s angry at herself for not having more self-control. Then she finds a note that Emily left- “Emily slept here”. This is too much for Naomi. Even in her bedroom, even when she’s totally alone, she can’t get rid of Emily. She crumples the note up, throws it across the room, and then immediately goes to retrieve it. She smooths it out, and falls asleep with it on her pillow. When she wakes up, Emily’s note is stuck to her cheek, and Emily’s name is printed on her face. Printed on her face the way it’s been printed on her heart for all these years. She tenderly touches Emily’s name, then rubs at her cheek, desperately trying to get the ink off, before accepting that no matter what she does, she’ll belong to Emily. She’s tried denying her feelings for Emily all these years, but it’s not working. The one person who she can actually trust, who wants to be her friend, who believes in her, is the person she’s been pushing away. So finally, she reaches out. For the first time, she goes to Emily instead of Emily finding her. She calls Emily and pleads, “can we go somewhere? Anywhere.”

The scene changes, and Naomi and Emily are biking down a dirt road. The song here is excellent, both as a song but also as a choice for this scene. It’s called “Jump In” by High Places, and the lyrics are “If you never take the first step/You cannot go too far/I’m sure you know that/You strike me as a smart kid/And you've got big plans/And big dreams/And big big goals/So get a move on/Jump in.” This suits Naomi perfectly. In everything in her life, she’s afraid to take the first step. She was afraid to run for school president. She was afraid to initiate things with Emily. But until she takes that first step, she’s not going to be able to achieve her goals of combating injustice or being with the woman that she loves. She has to jump in, and that’s what she’s been doing this whole episode. She ran for class president even though she was scared. She reached out to Emily. And she can jump in because she knows Emily will be by her side, reminding her that she’s a “smart kid with big plans and big dreams and big goals,” and that, as they say later in the song, Emily is “so impressed because you’ve done your best” and that together they can “get so much more done before the day is done.”

Emily is clearly not great at riding a bike. She keeps wobbling. But Emily Fitch is brave, and if Naomi needs to bike to feel better, then that’s what they’ll do. It makes sense to me why they switch to driving a moped next season. Naomi rides up in front and then looks back to make sure Emily is okay. They ride down to a lake which is beautifully green against Emily’s red hair. Naomi looks truly at peace here. They sit, quietly, calmly, serenely. Naomi says, “it’s lovely,” and clearly she means Emily is lovely, because she quickly covers it up with, “it’s a lovely place.” Beacon of bravery that she is, Emily begins to take off her clothes. Naomi protests that she didn’t bring a swimming costume, and Emily says that she didn’t either, but the sun won’t shine forever. Naomi continues protesting, saying that someone might be looking, and Emily responds, “honey, your body ain’t that special.” This is a lie, of course. But she’s here to be Naomi’s friend, so this is her attempt to put Naomi at ease. They don’t have to do anything if Naomi doesn’t want to. They can go at Naomi’s pace.

Naomi asks Emily not to look, but of course, Emily sneaks a peak, because Naomi’s body is that special to her. Naomi laughs and tells Emily that she wasn’t supposed to look, and they start play fighting until Naomi pushes Emily into the water. In turn, Emily coaxes Naomi into the water. She encourages Naomi to jump in, the way she has been all episode. Just like Effy in the previous episode, Naomi takes a leap of faith that this will all work out, and jumps into the water. For both Naomi and Effy, jumping into the water is a baptism. It’s a rebirth. They want to be made new again, to be people who believe in love and believe in themselves. This scene of them in the lake was actually meant to be longer, but Kathryn got hypothermia from how cold the water was, so they had to cut the rest. You can see her swimming to the edge and coughing.

Naomi and Emily sit by the fire, drinking vodka. Naomi says, “you all right, Em?” and it’s sweet that Naomi is using a nickname. When Emily doesn’t repsond, Naomi waves her hand in Emily’s face, “helloooooo?” In this moment, she needs to know that Emily is having fun, that Emily likes her, that Emily still thinks she’s good and smart and pretty, that everything is going to be okay. Emily says, “You know, that’s the first time you’ve asked me something.” (This is actually not true- we’ve seen Naomi ask Emily questions before). I think Emily knows that Naomi is anxious and wants confirmation that Emily likes her, because Emily understands Naomi. But she’s not going to give that comfort so easily. She needs Naomi to know, just a little bit, that Naomi needs to work too if this relationship is going to be successful. “No. I’m having the worst time of my life. Weather’s shit. Company’s even worse,” Emily says. But then, “it’s peaceful.” Emily knows that’s what Naomi wants- to be at peace- and she knows that it’s not just the scenery that’s peaceful. It’s the fact that they’re there together.

“Do you want to do blowbacks?” Emily asks, and I swear this has become a lesbian trope since Skins premiered. Naomi has her guard up again, saying that she’s all-seeing and she already knows that blowbacks are shit. Emily convinces her, once again, to jump in. To try something new. Naomi says, “ah, go ahead, disappoint me,” and we know that this is her fear. That Emily will disappoint her, or be disappointed in her, and leave. Disappoint her, the way her father has disappointed her, her mother has disappointed her, Kieran has disappointed her.

Naomi leans forward, fully initiating this time, and kisses Emily. Emily lets Naomi reach out, lets Naomi come to her this time. She promised Naomi she would be her friend, so she’s letting Naomi set the pace. Naomi jumps in all on her own this time, letting go of her fears, allowing herself to be at peace. Naomi says, “say something”. She needs to know that things are going to be okay, because this is the thing she’s wanted the most but also the thing she’s been the most scared of. Emily responds, “I’m all about experiments, me.” It’s a lie, one that’s meant to put Naomi at ease. It can be as much or as little as Naomi wants. They’re going at her pace. In this moment, I think Emily is afraid of breaking the spell, of pushing too hard now that she’s so close. They resume kissing, and discover what exactly it is that lesbians do in bed. 

The song in the background here is also perfect- it’s “Believer” by Susanna and the Magical Orchestra. It goes, “Didn’t think you would trust me/Thought you would see what I see/This day has been good for me too/but I can’t stay/you know why/didn’t want to end like this/though I might could convert…you are a believer/I am not.” Naomi didn’t think Emily could ever trust her. She thought Emily would see her the way she sees herself. But Emily believes in her, more than Naomi believes in herself, and as much as she wants to believe in herself, too, she can’t convert. So she feels like she has to end what she has with Emily, because she can’t believe. Not in herself, not in the love they have, not that everything will be okay in the end.

The scene changes to the next morning, and Naomi is once again leaving Emily behind, afraid of her feelings. In this moment, Emily is done being gentle and understanding. She’s tired of patching Naomi back up. She thought they had finally gotten to the point where Naomi could own their relationship, and she can’t stand to see it backslide like this. “TWICE? You’re gonna do this to me twice. Naomi, no! You fucking….stop right now! Don’t you dare leave me in your bed again. I know you, Naomi. I know you’re lonely. I think you need someone to want you. Well, I do want you. So be brave — and want me back.” Naomi doesn’t have any cover to hide under this time. There’s no excuse that it was “just the MDMA” or that it’s just an experiment, or that she’s just hanging out with a friend and totally not gay. She’s running away from a reality now, the reality that actually, Emily does like her back, and she could have this relationship if she wanted. And up until now, Emily has been so steadfast and brave, willing to go as slowly as necessary to protect Naomi’s feelings, because she knew that eventually, she and Naomi would get their chance. But she can’t be strong like that anymore. This is finally too much rejection for Emily. She throws herself out in the open, saying everything she’s been wanting to say but holding back on account of Naomi’s feelings. “I do want you. So be brave and want me back.”

Naomi goes home without saying anything to Emily. She quietly cries in the shower. She gets dressed in a yellow plaid shirt that mirrors the blue and yellow plaid shirt that Emily wore earlier in the episode. She finds that Kieran is now in bed with her mum. He’s finally assumed the fatherly role she always wanted him to be, but not quite the way she wanted. I like this in general. I think it makes sense that Kieran does eventually become the father figure she wanted him to be. But I think it’s a bit too soon to introduce Kieran this way, seeing as less than twenty four hours ago he tried to kiss her, and I can’t imagine Naomi’s mum would just be okay with that. Naomi goes to school and contemplates calling Emily, but can’t bring herself to do it. Doug and Harriet arrive to count the votes, so Naomi dives underneath the desk to hide. Harriet decides that Cook “will not win” and stuffs the extra votes for him in her bra. 

More than anything, Naomi hates injustice, and so when Harriet announces her as the winner, she says, “You should have more confidence. I mean, your tits are fine. Probably a bit flat, but no need to stuff your bra.” She then proceeds to pull the votes out of Harriet’s bra, and says, “Cook won. He’s our president.” Cook then declares a riot, and Naomi rings the fire alarm. Naomi sees Emily across the room, but she’s not ready to deal with that. Not yet. Kieran chases Naomi down in an attempt to apologize, and they eventually reach an agreement that Kieran should keep seeing Naomi’s mum, which… again, I’m all for this, but two days ago they hadn’t even met, and then when they did meet, it was because Kieran was coming to apologize to Naomi for kissing her. At what point did they get to know each other well enough that Kieran knows he likes Naomi’s mum, and why weren’t either of them worried about the whereabouts of Naomi? But in this moment, Naomi puts her resentment for her mum aside, puts her mum’s happiness first, and tells Kieran to go tell her mum how much he likes her.

Anyway, Naomi goes to leave when she sees Cook alone in a room. He says that he only entered the race to piss Naomi off, and this is a lie. He entered to impress Naomi, to see if he had a chance with her. But he rewrites the story, just a little bit, because he thinks he knows what we as the audience know- Naomi is gay, and she only has eyes for Emily. Naomi asks if Cook ever wishes things were simple, and he says, “Things are simple. I won. Now we get to willy waggle, yeah?” and this, too, is a lie. Things for Cook aren’t simple, and they never really have been. But if he can pretend they are, if he can rewrite his story as he sees fit, it’s easier to deal with. Naomi starts protesting that she never agreed to the deal, to which Cook responds, “Are you sure? Are you actually sure you never said because… Hang on. I think we should willy waggle.” Naomi starts to kiss him, in an attempt to be “normal”, in an attempt to “screw guys to make [her feelings for Emily] go away”. Cook says, “they all come to the Cookie Monster in the end.” In this moment, I think he feels that, against all odds, he’s won. Everything else might not be simple, but maybe this is, after all. He won, so he gets the prize. But Naomi stops- “Cook! This isn’t right…it just isn’t a goer.” Cook’s suspicions are confirmed now- Naomi isn’t interested in him, and she’s not going to be, because she’s in love with Emily. He says, You fancy me, I’m cool with it. So there’s obviously another reason why you won’t fuck me. And it’s probably a good one, because you’re, you know, clever.”

Finally, Naomi goes back home. Her mum enters the kitchen and tells Naomi that she kicked everyone out, and finally, Gina is being a good parent. She’s putting Naomi first. Then she sits down to tell Naomi the story of her pregnancy. She says, “your dad turned out to be a shitty little prick, and it was all a little bit rubbish. Until you made my life complete. And actually, rather fucking wonderful.” Naomi responds with a small, “I did that?” She’s finally getting the comfort that she wanted, this time from the person who was supposed to provide it all along. Gina continues, “I wasn’t expecting it. People who make us happy are never the people you expect. So, when you found someone, you’ve got to cherish it.” So Naomi realizes that she can make other people’s lives better just by being in them, and she goes to find the person that makes her happy, the person she didn’t expect, so that she can finally cherish her.

And this final scene is one of the most beautiful Skins has ever done. Naomi goes to Emily’s house, but Emily refuses to open the door because she’s been crying. Emily is totally honest in tis moment. She’s done lying for Naomi���s feelings. Naomi sits down next to the door, and finally admits how she feels. “I do want someone. Need someone. You were right.” “And?” Emily gently pushes, always so careful with Naomi, even when she doesn’t want to be. “and when I’m with you, I feel like I’m a better person. I feel happier. Less…alone. Less lonely.” Emily reaches her hand through the cat flap to hold Naomi’s, and Naomi, finally ready to say what she has to say, finally ready to be brave and love Emily back, continues, “But it’s not as simple as that, is it? Being with someone… mean, I don’t know. I mean, I don’t think so. I mean… Can’t we just sit like this… for a bit?” And Emily says, “yeah, we can. For a bit.” Emily still believes in Naomi, Naomi’s ability to overcome her fear and come to terms with her feelings. But she’s okay with waiting just a little bit longer, because she also believes that Naomi is still making baby steps, and that when Naomi is ready, she’ll be able to be with her.

[blackwomen-lgbtq-aas275]

Analysis of Paris is Burning

Paris Is Burning reveals the world of the “Children,” as Black gay men and women lovingly call themselves. This documentary examines the community’s flamboyant rituals of balls and voguing. It is not only a celebration of queer culture, but a chronicle of overcoming adversity by being vocally unapologetically yourself.

The overarching theme of Paris is Burning revolves around the influence that Black and Latine queer, trans, and gender non-conforming people had on the ballroom and drag scene. This influence stems from the resilience that these communities had in self-affirmation in the face of opposition from those who wanted to deny them their humanity.

The defiant joy we witness in the ball walkers at so many moments of the film, despite the AIDS pandemic, racism, homophobia, transphobia, pov­erty, homelessness, violence, harassment, addiction, and what­ever other hardships they may have been dealing with at any given time, was infectious in 1990, when the film premiered, and remains so today. In this era of fake news, hate speech, anti-trans legislation, the resurgence of white-supremacist ide­ology, immi­gration blockades, and mass violence to suppress social change and human-rights advancements, Paris Is Burning still provides a vision of vibrant resistance—a fierce proclamation that queer and trans lives matter, now as they did then. That message, along with the unique performance culture and the everyday lives that Paris illuminates for us, made it a global revelation when it was released and has since elevated it to legendary status.

The film is an education: a way into a lifestyle that even many of us who share an identity with the people onscreen otherwise had no access to, because this culture felt—still feels—so specific to a time and place. Which is part of the reason the movie’s legacy remains so complicated. It was directed by a white filmmaker with relative financial and social privilege: a complete outsider to ball culture. It went on to win a prize at Sundance, get a distribution deal with Miramax, and land raves from publications like the New Yorker and the New York Times—all signs, to some, that the movie was intended from the outset to be consumed by white audiences.

At least one star has spoken out against the film over the years. “I love the movie. I watch it more than often, and I don’t agree that it exploits us,” said LaBeija, mother of the House of LaBeija, and one of the documentary’s most memorable storytellers, to the New York Times in 1993. “But I feel betrayed. When Jennie first came, we were at a ball, in our fantasy, and she threw papers at us. We didn’t read them, because we wanted the attention. We loved being filmed. Later, when she did the interviews, she gave us a couple hundred dollars. But she told us that when the film came out, we would be all right. There would be more coming.” The film went on to make $4 million, according to Miramax, and a battle raged between some of the featured performers and the distributor over compensation. In the end, about $55,000 was divided among 13 performers, based on screen time.

Another problem with Livingston’s depiction of the ballroom and drag culture is that it virtually erases the impact that Black queer women and gender nonconforming people had in the scene. Although some were featured in the documentary, such as Octavia St. Laurent, they were relegated to such little screen time that you could’ve blinked and missed them. 

I’m reminded of bell hooks and her works surrounding Black Feminist Theory and oppositional gaze and how this influenced how I consumed this piece of media. The idea that the liberation of Black women would lead to the liberation of all people was something that hooks felt really strongly about and this documentary was an opportunity to not only uplift the LGBTQ+ community, but to uplift Black women. And, as is usually the case, Black women were forgotten. 

bell hooks was the founding mother of a critical discussion that focused on the role of the black female spectators and their relation to white and black representation on film. She contends that, despite a long history of oppression on screen and in real life, black people had the right to gaze, or observe, and at times this right was repressed, leading to a further ‘rebellious desire’ to gaze. This rebellious desire of looking is what hooks defined as ‘the Oppositional Gaze’. With this gaze, Black women can have the opportunity to be critical of Paris is Burning, because although it is important, it is not enough. Representation matters. Inclusivity matters. This is a start, but should NOT be the end.

[yournameyn]

Feeling Deeply: Chapter 3

Genre: Fluff so much fluff. Arranged Marriage Fic.

Pairing: Namjoon x OC

Summary: The story of two deeply feeling nerds who find themselves in an arranged marriage. Something neither of them really wanted but are now discovering just how much each needed. Away from their childhoods, their families & their homes, Namjoon & Brishti (the OC) are privileged immigrants who slowly build a home, a family & a true sense of self, together in 1960s London. Please note this is not the typical immigrant experience of that timespace and I’ve taken many-a-leap to write the fluuuufffiness I wanted to write.

A/N: It’s unabashed fluff. And eventual smut but I hope you’re okay with a really slow burn. Like, reaaaally slow. Both our characters are introverts & met as strangers so it’s going to take them a while to get the *ahem* fire going.

Big big big love to @sahmfanficbts, @mintjoonlep, @holdinbacksecrets, @sunshyngal, @xjoonchildx - who give me so much love and encouragement & whose straight up genius writing makes me swooooon!

Characters: Brishti is our OC. She’s a feminist, obviously. She’s Indian, wheatish in colour, curvy & slightly short. Brishti is bengali & her name means ‘Rain’. Her pet name is RimJhim which means the sound of rain. (Namjoon calls her Rim & she calls him Joon) This whole story is a tribute to Forever Rain.

The Namjoon in this fic is what I imagine he would have been had he not followed his dreams at the age of 13. Hopefully, I’m able to do justice to the idea as I write ahead.

Current Chapter: London, late 1963. Brishti & Namjoon meet her colleagues. They listen to the then-rising band The Beatles & take a strong liking to one particular track, if you know what I mean. Again, sorry to spoil but there’s no smut yet. I was not kidding when I said it’s a slooooow burn. Next chapter, it’s happening. There's not much conversation in this chapter, either. Is this almost 3k words of just CONTEXT to the actual smut or just a tease - you tell me!

Also, someone else we love is also introduced in this chapter!

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Previously in Feeling Deeply: Preface Chapter 1 Chapter 2

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Namjoon loved his weekends now. They were like a real couple, Brishti and him… setting the never ending “final touches” in their home, together. They went out to pubs and gardens, libraries and cafes together. And yet, to both their secret dismay, they hadn't moved ahead from that one hug they had shared. They'd played, instead, with words and been more and more intimate in their conversations.

Brishti introduced him to her colleagues - her group among the staff at the British Library. Working there was her pride & these folk were her joy. This was nerve-wracking for Namjoon because he knew how much she loved them. These were her people. Her true tribe. It was almost like he was meeting her parents. Instead of two indian elders (whom he had spoken to on the only international call she had made since their wedding), he found himself faced with a weird band of strangers. An English couple Harry & Kate who had adopted the library instead of a child, an elder woman from Japan, Sayuri-san - whose stories Brishti narrated to Namjoon all the time, a Korean guy (his age!) & Yana, a girl, Brishti’s age who was half English, half Iranian & completely in love with Sam, the black historian from America, as Brishti had reported. As they settled in for their picnic in Hyde Park, Namjoon tried his best to hide his shock when he found Sam was - one, a girl & two, as tall as him. He wondered which attribute threw him off more. Still, he was completely enjoying himself with Brishti’s Unlikely Gang of Weirdos that Will Save The World. That’s what she called them. Sayuri-san agreed - They were all groovy outcasts who had somehow clawed their way into the (apparently) cutthroat world mainstream librarians.

Brishti was glad to see Namjoon really hit it off with the only other Korean she knew, the guy who’d told her about the only place in London that sold black bean noodles, made the right way. Namjoon had almost cried when she had brought them over from work. The two of them spoke as if they had been thick as thieves for years. They talked about Korean poetry and the folk music they had to participate in their childhoods. They spoke about the music archive section of the library, which was heaven for Min Yoongi. The passion in Yoongi’s eyes when he spoke about maybe someday taking a class about world music appreciation was something Namjoon wished to have too, but wasn’t yet ready to admit.

As they were packing up their picnic, the conversation flowed to a new band in the country. Brishti spoke about how every young girl she had met recently just could not stop talking about how groovy The Beatles are. The elders in charge of the music archive brushed them off as a fad but she was insistent to bring it up every meeting - after all, it was teenage girls that had popularised & helped usher in the lyrical music of Vivaldi. Or of Lisztomania - that popularised the soft romantic tones of Liszt which formed the base of the modern love song. Namjoon loved to see her almost up in arms, struggling to find a better word for the admiration that girls had for music and musicians.

“It’s not hysteria… or fanaticism… it- it’s just love.” She had said. No one disagreed. In fact, everyone in her group was persuaded to (at least) give The Beatles a listen over the weekend.

And so, This evening, A Hard Day’s Night played as they arranged books & records at home. Brishti was arranging the books, apparently not having had enough of the task despite working as a full time librarian. Namjoon’s heart ached when he thought about how Brishti loved her job. Thankfully his mind never stayed on that thought for long. Namjoon wished he could pay attention to the song. These days, paying attention to anything but Brishti was almost impossible. The smallest movement in her, the smallest stir intrigued him.

Meanwhile, Brishti had been trying to figure out a way of getting him to touch her &… as silly as that sounded to her rational mind she couldn’t really come out and say it. Night after night when they’d stayed up talking about things or listening to music or just simply reading their respective books, on the floor or by the window with their legs sprawled out in front of each other, she wished he’d touch her… that somehow maybe he’d notice her feet. Strange as it was, she kept thinking about his hands, his fingers tracing the contour of her ankle while she didn’t turn one page of her book for almost an hour.

She understood the problem - both of them were so hyper-aware of each other while pretending not to be that an accident couldn’t really occur. Things had to be done & Brishti thought about how she shouldn’t let tradition dictate who makes the first move. She also kicked herself for not following tradition and stopping him from taking his pillow & blanket away to the couch on their wedding night they were supposed to sleep on the same bed. It made her heart race that she could sleep next to this Korean Greek God-like feminist man. Ufff. She was covered in tense knots everywhere and anytime she even thought of making a move, the fear in her would make her do something else - like unpack all the books into a makeshift bookcase.

They were facing in opposite directions in the same room and Brishti couldn’t help glancing back at Namjoon again and again. The broad expanse of his back made her long to hug him again. They hadn’t touched each other since she let go of the hug. It made her ache, the memory of him moving away from her. Next time they touch, she wouldn’t let go first - of this she was certain.

Brishti looked at him again & smiled, wondering how someone so tall could look so tiny & cute. Namjoon did look surprisingly tiny, poring over the vinyls & neatly arranging them. She smiled thinking about how he had spent some time wondering if the records should be kept chronologically or alphabetically.

Finally, he had announced, “Ofcourse! I have it! The category has to be mood! The...” Brishti loved the small pauses Namjoon took to find the perfect word. “The story of each album and the feeling it brings out!” The way he smiled, pleased with his decision created a flutter in her heart.

Looking at him poring over each song in each album trying to discern what the overall feeling of it was, she felt an unbearable urge to tease him, to disturb his cataloguing. She would go over and irritate him… probably tickle his waist or blow in his ears. Or maybe just nuzzle his neck. Brishti wondered if these things would actually irritate Namjoon or perhaps lead to something else... The thought made her blush so fiercely, she turned to face her pile of books. Brishti wished she could walk over, silently demand a space in Namjoon’s lap, he would throw out anything that crowded his lap & she would sit there, being cuddled, enveloped in him & talk about songs… if she could talk, at such a moment that is.

She needed to stop staring at him and yet, she couldn’t help but look... She was a warm-blooded woman after all. And Kim Namjoon was a particularly delicious man. It wasn’t so much that he was tall… plenty of men were tall. (She rolled her eyes thinking how most everyone was taller than her.) Unlike other men, though, Namjoon was not awkward or gangly. He had wide shoulders and a gorgeous neck. She had to actively keep her eyes focussed on something else when she could see the contours of his chest.

In that first week of them living together she wanted him. She felt the heat of being seen by those sharp beautiful eyes that held a deep fire in them. Brishti found herself thinking more and more about how his back looked, how it would feel to be cuddled up against that broad beautiful chest, how it would feel to touch him and to be touched by him. She blushed & laughed to herself when her spontaneous thought was that she’d like to “climb that tree” - whenever Namjoon stood up after being scrunched over his table, writing. That yearning awakened a much fiercer part of Brishti -

Why couldn’t she?! He was her husband. They have to come closer at some point, so what was she waiting for? Without a second thought, her body moved to get up & walk over to him. But as it had happened every time, her mind caught up to her at the very last minute. As Brishti walked over, bent, stretched out... for a pile of books close to him. She was close enough to touch him. And still, she just picked up the books & walked back. Thankfully for Brishti, she had a natural sort of nonchalance. Something Namjoon envied. Brishti did not know what this little stunt of hers did to him. Namjoon, with his fists balled, had to hold himself back in that moment. He had to stop himself from grabbing her; from pulling her into his lap and having his way with her.

The gentle thread-like tug he had felt when he’d first seen Brishti’s photos... it had become a magnetic pull now. Shocking and also somehow inevitable.

It had been more than a month of them living together and Namjoon was wrestling with something. An idea, apparently. It was as though an idea was caught in a vast net that he had laid out across the ocean of his mind. But he was having trouble fishing it out. He understood there was no point forcing it, that the idea, the thought would emerge when it, or when he was ready.

Taking his time, slowly, Namjoon was understanding how he had done the perfect thing for her, accidentally. He was confused too, when his instinct told him to let his bride sleep alone on their marital bed the first night they had moved in this flat. He had reasoned that it was the decent thing to do. Unknowingly, he gave her the time to explore, to own that space; Not crowding her with his body. Not invading her with expectations that, no matter how silent, would be blaringly evident. That was the right thing to do. Then.

Now things felt different. Now, it felt like she had made that space, this whole home hers. But then that’s where his thought-net felt stuck. The thought he wanted to fish out kept pulling at him, telling him she needed something else now. Like Brishti craved something else now. He wondered if she, like him, craved touch. Was that why her body instinctively moved, stretched, inched closer towards him these days. Was this why he’d found his shirt among the blanket instead of the laundry basket the other day?

Namjoon tried to shake off these thoughts again - they felt dangerous, explosive. What was happening? He looked back at his beautiful wife and saw her stretch her arms, then her abdomen, all the way till her hips and then bend forward to touch her toes. She mewled, very softly when she did that. Namjoon felt the familiar flip in his stomach again. This time, thankfully, the thought leapt up within reach too.

Namjoon suddenly understood just how feline Brishti is. Somehow, it was a key he needed. The idea surged through him & made him stand up. Because it wasn’t just an idea, it was an epiphany. Brishti looked at him, her eyes asking, saying, expecting something he didn’t understand fully.

The tingle that ran down his spine told him he was about to.

“You okay?” Brishti asked, concerned & embarrassed because the move she expected hadn’t come. But then again, it was probably too much to think Namjoon had stood up to carry her & throw her on their bed. Wasn’t it?

He was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room looking confused. Namjoon recovered & asked, “Coffee?”

Brishti smiled & nodded. Namjoon rushed to the kitchen. The catching of this thought excited him. Because after living with her for almost a month, he had just now realised it is this attribute - of being feline-ly feminine or femininely feline - that is what makes his body almost overpower any semblance of restraint his mind had imposed.

At first it seemed silly but soon Namjoon realised it isn’t. Not at all. It really clicked in place like the right key, the precise note does - he understood how to BE with her. Be there for the feline creature-like woman that Brishti was revealing herself to be: The way she walked, slowly almost moodily… letting her feet touch and caress each surface her feet felt. She would be walking across the room but would stop just to walk back and forth, softly, in a way that one can’t really call pacing at all. And everytime she touched something she liked, or saw or tasted something she loved, she made these small sounds that would make Namjoon’s heart melt. They were always half-way between a purr and a moan and they made him wonder what pleasure would make her sound like. Namjoon thought about how Brishti is graceful but her grace, like the curves of her beautiful body, aren’t timid; How, it’s a grace that announces itself... sometimes even before she walks in.

It isn’t the only thing that attracted him to her, not by a far cry. Namjoon thought about how he loves her mind, her words. But this felt, somehow, more… more visceral or... wanting to be. Could something formless long to be touched?; To become tangible, touchable? This feeling, in his chest and his gut. This feeling within him, it jumps, flips every time she walks by. These days it seems like Brishti walks by closer and closer each time she passes him. Like she needs to feel the texture of his skin the same way she needs to feel the slight drag of the rug on the soles of her feet. And it just adds more depth to this deep cavernous feeling within him. Instinctual whispers echoing within-

Why does it feel like he needs to touch a fragrance?

Like all he needs to do is reach out?

Like the moment he will reach out, an essence, an aroma will become an experience?

It felt like Brishti was calling out to him silently. That magnetic pull was stronger than ever and it was pulling him, drawing him to her, telling him to reach out, so she can find her way to him. That feeling, the way he was being pulled… that was feline. Like she needed him to reach out so she could make him hers too. And then, then it happened. The first four notes of ‘And I love her’ played and pulled him to her.

In that moment, in their 7th week together, as Brishti was tracing the lines of Namjoon’s back, gawking at him, thinking about this man - this gorgeous, curious, wonderful man - as her husband… a thought so fantastical it would make her squirm in her seat. Just as she was recovering from the thought, releasing the tension in her shoulders. The knots he didn’t know he caused, Namjoon kept the cups of coffee aside and extended his hand.

‘I give her all my love, that’s all I do…” To him, the instant she did it again, - the stretching her arms all the way up. The little moan she made every time she did that, the way her back arched and highlighted all her curves… it drove him, his body, his instinct to reach out.

“And if you saw my love, you’d love her too.”

The stomach flipped, again. This time, though, his instinct acted before his mind knew what he was supposed to do. Thankfully, his mind caught up -

He had just reached out. Reached out for her to claim him. But to one who didn’t know everything that had been going on inside both their hearts, it would look like he was inviting her to dance. Brishti looked at his hand and then at his eyes and suddenly Namjoon understood the reason for this magnetic pull... these lyrics is what she was saying all along -

“A love like ours could never die, as long as I have you near me...”

She took his hand & left no distance between them. Brishti realised there was music playing in the room only after she took Namjoon’s hand. Before this, she could only hear her own heartbeat, sharpened to an intensity never before experienced. Sharpened to a glint in a way that only love can. Love… and unmistakable, undeniable lust. Her heart had been beating with so much longing it had clouded everything else.

Now, in this moment, with his heart so close to hers, she could finally hear the music. This is what she had needed. This is what her heart had been pining for. And she knew. Without the shadow of a doubt she knew... he had heard her.

Brishti moved to the simple guitar strings that were tugging them both. The melody deepened each time the same four notes played. And each time they rooted deeper in the soil of her heart, she moved him too. His hands on her waist, caressing her curves everytime the four notes played. And they played over and over again… Namjoon followed the lyrics and sang along with his beautiful deep dark chocolate voice in her ears, saying -

“And I love her...”,

And his strong arms around her. How could she… Brishti, even if her name didn’t mean the rain, how could she have resisted pouring?

“Bright are the stars that shine, dark is the sky, I know this love of mine will never die...”

This evening was the first time they’d really touched each other. Stood so close to each other. Moved together.

------------------------------------------------------

Oooooh god you read it?! Thank you so much! Please let me know what you think! Get into my messages about it! I would love to hear what you felt about this!

This is the song that's mentioned here in case anyone is curious.

[biisexualemma]

family first. oscar diaz

word count: 1795

warnings: no

requested: "can I please ask for an Oscar Diaz imagine where he's in love with Jasmine cousin? and Jasmine is...Jasmine😂I adore her"

plot: you’re dating oscar in secret

a/n: hello it’s been a while but i’ve been back at work and i’ve been super uninspired when it comes to writing for oscar lately so sorry about the lack of content oop i am workinf my way through peoples requests i promise i’m just taking my time hehe. anyway. here you go, thank you for requesting! love you guys and hope everyone is well 🤍

masterlist

"'sup mami," you crossed your arms over your chest as you walked up the path to his house. you tried to ignore the stares from the group of boys sitting around holding their dicks. instead, you looked at oscar only, paying no attention to his friends. "can't stay away?"

"is my cousin here?" you asked, ignoring his comment.

oscar was sat on one of the steps leading up to the house, his eyes hadn't moved from you since he saw you walking up the street. he wore a smirk, he always did when you were around, he couldn't help it.

"come 'ere and i'll tell you," he patted his lap. you gritted your teeth. he was such an asshole around his friends but you were getting used to it. it didn't phase you as much now because you knew what he was really like. this was just an act. didn't mean it didn't piss you off.

oscar was a nice guy. you'd been seeing him for months now and it was good. it was secret and private and good. the only other person who knew was jasmine, and that was because she couldn't mind her own business if her life depended on it. she wasn't thrilled to find out you were dating the head of los santos, but you were sure she'd come around once she really got to know him.

"is jasmine here?" you repeated. you tried hard to say it without any of the attitude, but the feminist in you was screaming at you to put him in his place.

he hissed. "watch your tone, mami," the other santos members sneered, watching with amusement. you wanted to slap the smirk off of all their faces. he was pushing his luck.

before you could rage at him, he cut you off. "she's not here, mami," you hated him teasing you like this. you rolled your eyes muttering a exasperated thanks before turning to walk away. was it so hard for him to just tell you that in the first place.

as you turned though you felt a hand slap your ass. before you could register, you turned back around and smacked oscar across the face. he raised his eyebrow, tilting his head up to look at you. he was taken aback. but you were stern. he knew he was gonna get a mouthful from you later.

"asshole," you mumbled, turning your back on him and his friends so you could continue your search for your cousin.

"damn, i don't know how anyone could put up with her— she's loca," one of the santos sneered but you were already walking away and out of earshot. oscar, on the other hand, slapped him over the head.

—

please don't be jasmine. please don't be jasmine—

"oh hell no," oscar rolled his eyes when jasmine answered the door, instead of you. he sighed, looking at her pleadingly, ready to make his case but she shook her head. "you might as well leave now, spooky. if that's even your real name."

he gave a quick look of confusion. she really was something else. he knew where you got your crazy from. "are you still mad 'cause i said i'd kill you after i smashed you? 'cause that was a game."

"no," she folded she arms across her chest. "but that was pretty rude," she raised her eyebrows, placing her hand on the doorframe, stressing that she was not letting him in any time soon.

"it was a stupid game," jasmine was having none of it. "come on, just let me see her—" he pleaded with her, but she quickly cut him off.

"uh-uh. she doesn't wanna see your sorry ass," she quirked one eyebrow, letting out a humph. jasmine never really liked oscar. she thought he was hot, of course everyone did, but he was an asshole. a real asshole. and in her eyes he would never be good enough for you. she was fiercely protective over her family and friends. when you told her how he'd treated you earlier, she vowed he wouldn't be stepping foot in this house again. you thought she was being dramatic, but clearly, she was deadly serious. jasmine let a lot of things slide, but the objectification of women wasn't one of them.

"i think she does— ask her," he was pushing it. but he needed to see you. he didn't wanna leave things the way they were earlier.

"i asked, she's over it and you."

oscar knew she was lying. he was used to jasmine's overdramatic and protective nature by now. but deep down he wanted jasmine to like him, just because her opinion meant so much to you. you and jasmine were really close growing up, and even closer now you'd been living with her for the past year. but she really made it hard to be nice to her sometimes.

"come on—"

"go home, pendejo," she slammed the door in his face.

-

you looked up from your book, seeing oscar at your window, knocking quietly. you clenched your jaw, you were still pretty pissed at him. part of you wanted to leave him out there in the cold, but instead you went over and shoved the window open so he could climb in.

"forgiven me yet?" he followed you to where you were you'd climbed back onto your bed, he stood in front of you. he nudged your knees apart, placing himself in between your legs. "'cause jasmine hasn't," he rested his hands on your shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze. oscar often touched you like this, just to have some sort of physical contact. even when you were mad at him.

you frowned as you tilted your head upwards to look at him. "you're an asshole," you mumbled. oscar couldn't help but smile. you were pretty hot when you were mad at him.

"yeah, you said," he teased. he moved his hands to either side of your face, rubbing his thumb across your cheek. he couldn't help being in awe of you all the time. i mean, he thought you were hot before, but now that he knew you, you were even more.

but you just frowned, pushing his hands away from your face. "sorry," he mumbled. "i'm really sorry, nena— promise."

he still stood between your legs, his arms back resting on your shoulders. your head was resting against his stomach. you mumbled. "do you know how annoying you are?"

"you slapped me mami, so, yeah, i have an idea," he wore a small smirk.

you rolled your eyes, moving your hands to his stomach and pushing him away. "you deserved it," your frown deepened.

"i know," he agreed. "sorry," he repeated. he wore an expression on his face that made you soften a little. he really knew how to make you melt when you were alone. you wished he would just treat you like this all time.

you sighed. "you're lucky i like you so much."

he chuckled, moving closer to you and wrapping his arms around you tightly, squeezing you.

"yeah," he laughed quietly. "i know i'm lucky."

"damn right, you are."

"hey y/n— oscar came over—" oscars eyes widened, instinctively moving away from you. "oh my god are you kidding me?" he was caught sneaking into her house after she specifically told him to get lost. he was definitely not going to get on jasmines good side this way.

"jas— calm down ok—"

"i just wanted to talk to her," oscar pleaded. he turned to mush when it came to you. he had to ignore jasmines orders so he could apologise properly to you. "alright? so chill."

"chill?" she raised her eyebrows. oscar gulped. he really knew how to put his foot in it. "i'm a junior officer in training— this is breaking and entering— i could have your ass arrested— again."

"jasmine!" you stopped her from going any further. you choked out a laugh, you couldn't believe she was acting like this. she had her arms crossed over her chest, and her eyes piercing into oscars, who desperately tried to look anywhere but at jasmine. "i love you, but please give a rest!"

oscar let out a quiet snort. jasmine let out a humph, squinting her eyes at oscar who looked away. "i've got eyes everywhere," she warned, before listening to you for once and leaving you two alone again.

"sorry," you mumbled, laughing slightly. "she's a little intense— i mean you know— you've dealt with her first hand," you shook your head. "she means well," you tried to justify her actions. she was just being protective.

"i get it," and he did, he was protective of you too. he knew jasmine was trying to keep you safe, but so was oscar. the sooner she realised that, the better.

you hummed, almost content. "what?" oscar nudged your side. you shrugged your shoulders.

you sighed. "you think this is a good idea?" you didn't like to admit it but you didn't know if you could deal with everything that came with being oscar's girlfriend, out in the open.

oscar's hands rested on your hips, tugging you closer to him. "positive," he pressed a kiss to your forehead. you eased into him, letting him hold you for a little while. he could feel you overthinking. he sighed. "stop it."

"i can't help it," you looked up at him, his arms still tightly wrapped around you. you wore a slight frown as you thought it over. "i just don't know how people will react.”

"who cares," he shrugged. "they deal with it or they don't. not my problem."

"i guess," you hummed.

"stop overthinking," he nudged you. you sighed again. "you like me?"

"yeah," you nodded.

"ok," he shrugged. his hands moved to your face, forcing you to look up at him when your eyes kept wandering. "i like you too, think about that. not about what other people think of it."

your expression relaxed. you knew he was right. you just had to let go of what other people thought of you. you'd drive yourself crazy thinking up every possible scenario. you just had to focus on your relationship, and not let what other people think affect you.

"ok," you tiptoed, kissing his lips quickly and softly. "you're right. maybe we should stop hiding."

"finally," he wore a smirk on his lips. "everyone will know you're mine."

you laughed, softly. oscar leaned down and kissed you again, you smiled into the kiss. having to pull away to catch your breath. "at least girls will stop hitting on you in front of me now," you smiled, looking at the up side. "or, i can put them in their place if they do."

"that's my girl."

[samwisethewitch]

Practicing Witchcraft in Secret

I love things that are traditionally “witchy.” I love dressing candles with herbs. I love setting things on fire. I love making poppets and charms. But not everyone is able to be so obvious in their craft. For various reasons, some witches choose to be secretive about their magical practice.

Why Would You Want to Keep It a Secret?

Historically, witches kept their practice a secret because it wasn’t safe to be open about their beliefs. In the late middle ages, the Catholic Church began to actively persecute witchcraft, herbal medicine, and folk spirituality with the publication of “witch hunting guides” like the Malleus Maleficarum. This witch hunting fervor would continue even after the Protestant Reformation, with some of the most famous witch hunts (such as the Salem trials) carried out by Protestants.

It is important to remember that the witch hunts were political at their heart and that very few of the people executed for witchcraft were what we would recognize today as witches. They were mostly women, poor folks, or members of ethnic or religious minorities. But even so, the danger of being accused of witchcraft and/or devil worship drove many medieval witches, herbalists, and pagans to hide their practice.

The United States experienced a modern witch hunt of sorts in the 1980s with the “Satanic Panic.” We still don’t entirely understand what caused this cultural phenomenon, but what we do know is that it resulted in widespread paranoia about devil worship. Anything that could be misconstrued as “satanic” was shunned or outright persecuted, from Dungeons & Dragons to heavy metal music to nature-based religions like Wicca — and, yes, witchcraft. People who had been comfortably open about their spirituality suddenly found themselves practicing behind closed doors. If you’re over 30, you may remember this. If you’re under 30, the Satanic Panic probably shaped how your parents view witchcraft and paganism, and they may still be grossly misinformed as a result.

Even today, a lot of witches choose to keep their practice a secret because it would be unsafe or uncomfortable to go public. Many witches have family members, friends, or coworkers who would be uncomfortable if they knew about their witchcraft, and may even choose to end the relationship because of it. Some witches live in culturally Christian areas where it might be harder for them to get jobs or make friends if they were openly self-identifying as a witch. Some of us live in places where an outdoor ritual could get the cops called on us, or have missionaries showing up to save our souls.

On the other hand, some witches just like privacy. You may feel like your spirituality is nobody’s business but yours, and for that reason you may prefer to do witchcraft in a way that is more subtle and secretive. Desire for privacy is a perfectly valid reason to stay “in the broom closet.”

There are also some magical traditions that require members to swear a vow of secrecy and to keep the group’s secrets. However, these traditions usually require an in-person initiation, so I won’t be discussing them here.

Inconspicuous Witchcraft

If you haven’t read my posts about magical journaling and kitchen magic, I highly recommend you check them out. Those are two forms of magic that are very easy to practice discretely.

No matter what your reason for keeping your practice a secret, here are a few tips for making magic without drawing attention.

Use scented candles. Candle magic is one of the easiest and most versatile forms of spellwork, and all it requires is a candle and your intention. Scented candles are perfect for undercover witches because, rather than adding herbs and oils, you can simply buy a scent that matches your intention. (For example, a vanilla candle is great for love, while a pumpkin spice scent will attract wealth.) Plus, they’re so commonplace that no one will think twice about seeing one in your bedroom or on your desk at work. If you’re a purist and want to make sure you’re using real plant materials, you can get all natural candles scented with essential oils — but lots of witches use artificial scents and get good results, so don’t feel like you have to go with the more expensive option.

Diffuse essential oils. Essential oils contain the concentrated essence of a plant, which makes them a must-have tool for witches. Essential oils are also extremely popular right now, both for holistic healing and for aromatherapy, so you definitely won’t attract any negative attention for using them. You can get a good essential oil diffuser for under $20 online. Some brands overcharge for their oils, but you can find good quality oils for under $10. When choosing an essential oil, look at the magical correspondences for the plant it is made from. You can diffuse oils to infuse your space with their energy, similar to the way you would use incense.

Enchant your perfume. You can choose a perfume to match your intention or make your own custom perfume by mixing essential oils in a carrier oil. Focus on your intention as you spray the perfume, letting it infuse your energy field with magic. You can also buy magical perfume blends from witch-owned businesses online or on Etsy.

Learn shufflemancy. “Shufflemancy” is a modern form of divination that is done by putting a playlist on shuffle — whatever song plays first contains an intuitive message for you, either in the lyrics or in how it makes you feel. You can find playlists specifically made for divination by Googling “shufflemancy playlist,” or you can make your own by compiling a playlist of songs from different genres that deal with different topics. Just be sure to keep it diverse — if your playlist only has love songs on it, you might not get very helpful messages if you have a question about your career.

Learn bibliomancy. This divination method is similar to shufflemancy, but much older. Bibliomancy is done by asking your question while holding a book, focusing on your question while connecting with the book’s energy, and then opening it to a random page. There is a long, long tradition within Christianity of doing this with the Bible — if you feel connected to a certain sacred text, you could use it for bibliomancy. You could also use a book of poetry, a novel, or even a dictionary. However, I think it’s important to use a book you feel a connection to, rather than something randomly grabbed off the shelf.

Use Pinterest and Spotify as manifestation tools. You may have heard of vision boards, a tool used to manifest something by creating a detailed collection of images that match your intention. Pinterest boards are already essentially virtual vision boards, and creating one with focused intent can be a spell by itself. Likewise, you can use Spotify playlists for manifestation. To do this, create a playlist of songs that match your intention (songs about money or love, for example) and listen to it while meditating on your desired outcome.

Choose your outfits with intention. You can pick clothes based on color correspondences (see this post for a guide to color magic), the material they are made from (a wool sweater vs. a cotton T-shirt), or some other symbolism. For example, if you want to feel empowered, you might wear leopard print to channel the energy of a fierce predator.

Enchant a piece of jewelry for a specific purpose. You can choose your jewelry based on the correspondence of the metal or gemstones it is made from, make your own piece, or use whatever you already have on hand. You can enchant this jewelry by passing it over the flame of a candle or through the vapor of an essential oil diffuser. State what purpose you want this charm to serve, either out loud or in your mind. Wear this jewelry whenever you need to tap into that energy, and make sure to cleanse it often.

Create magical art. If you want to manifest something, draw or paint a picture of it. You don’t have to be a skilled artist — what matters is that you are taking your mental image of what you want and bringing it into the physical world. Fold up the picture and keep it in your pillow, or in some other special place. Likewise, if you want to banish something, draw or paint a picture of it and then rip it into little pieces and throw it out. This ritual allows you to purge yourself of the negative emotions tied to the thing you are banishing.

Take a magical bath. We rarely have more privacy than when we’re in the tub. Taking a bath is already a ritual of sorts, and it’s easy to add magic. You can, of course, make magical bath salts by mixing essential oils into Epsom salt, but you can also create bath spells with household objects. For example, a bath with salt and vinegar will clear up nasty energy, while adding milk to your bath will attract love and abundance.

Practicing in secret does not have to mean a less deep or well-rounded practice. There are lots of magical acts that can be done subtly or kept private. The suggestions in this post are by no means exhaustive, and I hope they will give you some ideas for other ways to fill your life with undercover magic.

Resources:

“Introduction” from The Malleus Maleficarum at http://www.malleusmaleficarum.org

The Fat Feminist Witch podcast, “Episode 34 — Witches, Midwives, and Doulas”

“Most witches are women, because witch hunts were all about persecuting the powerless” by Bridget Marshall for The Conversation

New World Witchery podcast, “Episode 118 — The Satanic Panic”

[shewholovestoread]

Fear Street Trilogy Review

Beware, spoilers ahead.

I love horror movies but good horror movies are so hard to come by. Fear Street grabbed my attention as soon as they released the first trailer, it looked like a call-back to the slasher films of old, back when they were still good. And the best part was the apparent presence of lesbians, count me in!

Fear Street is based on the books by the same name by R. L. Stine, a lot of us remember Stine for another horror classic, Goosebumps. The Fear Street novels were aimed at older audiences and were way more bloody than Goosebumps- lots of teenagers dying. The films don’t adapt any particular book but rather the tone and rough setting and I think that works to its advantage.

The Setting:

Fear Street is based on the fictional town of Shadyside, the poorer and more unfortunate twin of its sister-town Sunnyside. Sunnyside is sunny, wealthy and where nothing bad ever happens. Shadyside in contrast is poorer, the homes more run-down and where, every few years, some resident snaps and goes on a murderous rampage, killing their own friends, family or whoever they can get their hands on. There are those who believe that Shadyside is cursed by Sarah Fier, a witch who was hanged in the 1600s when she cut off her hand and used it to curse the town.

Fear Street Part 1:

1994 functions like the introduction and set-up for the trilogy. It introduces us to the characters, Deena (Kiana Madeira), Sam (Olivia Scott Welch), Josh (Benjamin Flores Jr.), Kate (Julia Rehwald) and Simon (Fred Hechinger). They unwittingly trigger the curse when they stumble across the bones of Sarah Fiers, soon killers are chasing them, killing-machines powered by the curse and who can’t be killed. Deena, Sam, Josh, Kate and Simon have to put aside their differences and work together to survive the night.

Fear Street Part 2: 1978

1978 opens with the survivors of 1994 going to C. Berman (Gillian Jacobs), the lone survivor of the Camp Nightwing massacre. It provides insight into the massacre that saw dozens of Shadyside kids being killed. 1978 takes us back to the day leading up to the bloody night. We meet the Berman sisters, Ziggy and Cindy (Sadie Sink and Emily Rudd respectively), Alice (Ryan Simpkins) and Tommy (McCabe Syle) When an axe-wielding murderer starts butchering the camp residents, Cindy and Alice, while trying to escape, stumble into the cave system that runs under the camp and discover Sarah’s hand and that the only way to break the curse is to reunite the hand with her body. However, they are unable to break the curse when they realise that the body is not buried where they thought it would be. Alice, Cindy and Ziggy are killed by the cursed murderers with only Ziggy being revived thus being labeled the lone survivor. In the present day, Deena and Josh dig out the hand from where Ziggy and Cindy left it, when Deena reunites the hand with the body, she sees visions of Sarah Fiers, leading us into the third and final film.

Fear Street Part 3: 1666

1666, the year it all started. We see the events play out leading up to the hanging. Deena is inside Sarah’s body, seeing and experiencing her life as if it were own. We learn that it was never Sarah’s curse, but in fact it was the Goodes who had made a deal with the devil, securing power for themselves (their descendants are the mayor and sheriff in 1994) Sarah Fiers was just the scapegoat. Every time someone saw a vision of Sarah, she was trying to show them the truth and un-dead killers hunted them to keep them from exposing it.

The films work individually but their impact really hits home once you’ve watched all 3. Leigh Janiak crafts such an intricate story and links 3 time periods, weaving them through each other seamlessly. With 3 films, she also has the time to invest in these different time periods and the characters that inhabit them.

The story, both in terms of individual films as well as the trilogy as a whole, is engaging and engrossing. It keeps the audience on their toes and the edge of their seats, waiting and dreading as the bodies pile up. Janiak also grounds the story so that it feels real even as the characters are fighting off un-dead killers, adding to the nail-biting tension.

There’s plenty to admire for a horror film buff, from the Scream reference in 1994, to Friday the 13th in 1978 and The Witch (or VVitch) in 1666. There’s also a good amount of gore to be found along with some really inventive ways of killing, who knew bread cutters/slicers could be so menacing.

There’s so much attention to detail in terms of costume and production design that you really feel like you’re in 1994, 1978 or even 1666. All of these work to draw you in as the viewer, adding to the authenticity on screen. The clothes and places feel lived-in. The song choices are amazing with popular hits from 1994 and 1978, the soundtrack definitely elevates the visuals. The original score in 1666 was absolutely gorgeous, especially Deena and Sam’s theme.

The sequence of the films with 1994 being the first, followed by 1978 and finally 1666 was a great choice with each film revealing a little more of the puzzle till all the pieces are revealed in 1666. It keeps the tension alive and keeps the characters and the audience constantly guessing. It also allows Janiak to sprinkle just enough subtle clues that become apparent when rewatching the films.

The characters are one of the best things in the trilogy, they are so well written, and I mean that for almost all of the main cast which is rare. One of the best things that Janiak does is repeat actors, especially the principle cast. For instance, a lot of actors we see in 1994 and 1978 appear in 1666 playing different roles but with a similar dynamic. It helps tell the story without worrying about too many new faces and worrying about whether or not the audience will be able to keep track of them. The return of old faces also ensures that the audience is already a little invested in them and their well-being.

Small side-note: I really appreciated that there was no sexual violence. It always worries me when I start a horror show/film and it was such a relief that they did not go that route. There is a lot of violence and a lot of people and kids die but it’s always just slightly campy enough that keeps it from being genuinely disturbing.

One of the things that always irk me with slasher films (especially the old ones) are how white they were, no characters of colour and if there were any, they always died. There were also no queer characters. Fear Street undoes that beautifully, all of our main characters are outsiders, they are people of colour, they are queer. In another film, they would have been nameless characters, among the first to die. Here they are the heroes. I loved all of them and I hated that Alice, Kate and Simon died, to be honest, I expected the core group to survive, Kate especially.

Fear Street is also unapologetically feminist and Janiak does this without it being too obvious. The central conflicts in the story are between women (sister/ friends/ ex-girlfriends) but they also band together and fight for each other. It’s worth noting that most of the core relationships are between women (Deena-Sam, Ziggy-Cindy-Alice, Sarah-Hannah) and those are not coincidences.

I loved how gay this trilogy was, Deena and Sam’s love for each other was the driving force and was at the heart of the story. Even in 1666, Sarah’s crime was not so much witchcraft as it was daring to love someone you’re not supposed to and fighting back against the proprietary nature of the men who sought to control them. Sarah and Hannah loved each other fiercely and we see that same love reflected hundreds of years later in Deena and Sam who fight for each other relentlessly. I also appreciated that Deena and Sam were exes instead of a new relationship. It meant that they already had history, they shared a familiarity and comfort with each other that a new relationship would have had to build onscreen.

The Fear Street Trilogy is one of the best horror trilogies I’ve seen in a while, each film is consistently great and delivers gore and violence coupled with immense heart. It has one of the best queer relationships I’ve seen on screen and spoiler alert, they get a happy ending. I’m sick and tired of lesbian women dying or separating because of realism. Damn realism, give me happy women loving women and who live through their traumatic ordeal. Watch Fear Street for them if for nothing else. Now excuse me as I prepare to rewatch the trilogy.

[spidersbane]

Hello! Can I get MCU, The Hobbit, and The Man From U.N.C.L.E. ship? 💚

Appearance: She/her. 179,5cm tall, rectangle body shape. Fair skin complexion with quite a few birthmarks. Dyed brown with honey-red highlights, shoulder-length, straight hair with bangs. The left eye is a mix of two colors – a smaller portion of (darker) greyish-blue and a larger portion of hazel; while the right eye is just a (lighter) greyish-blue. Heptagon face shape with two dimples on the left cheek and one on the right cheek (only visible while smiling). A gap between the upper front teeth.

Personality (good and bad traits): Ever since I was a kid, I was always quite mature for my age – I identify myself as an old soul. I come off as polite and well-mannered to strangers, yet I tend to keep it to myself by being reserved. But, that’s because I have social anxiety and I’m nervous and shy when meeting/talking to people. The only people I’m comfortable with being with my inner circle – closest friends and family. I am usually more “open” with my friends than with my family. With my friends I can be my “truest-self” – I smile more, I laugh more, I feel more accepted and understood. I am the mom and the fashionista of the group. Don’t get me wrong, I am fiercely protective of my family, especially of my mother and younger sister. But, lately, I’ve been feeling like the “black sheep” of the family, Cinderella who’s been taken advantage of. I express my affection for the people I care about in little, but practical, ways. I can be a little stiff when it comes to open, gushy displays of affection. Others turn to me for help and advice. I’m kind-hearted and generous, always ready to help a person in need. Always have been motherly towards children. Very awkward at keeping small talk (usually with people that I’m not that close with). Absolutely, hate speaking in front of a public, and if I do, because of my nervousness, I tend to mess up my words and/or I practice whatever I’m about to say in my head at first. I appreciate the simplicity and am often most comfortable when I’m not getting too much attention from the world. I am sensitive – both to criticism and to others’ feelings (I sponge up the feelings and moods of people and the environment around me). Have a hard time saying no or expressing my true thoughts, feelings. I get influenced by other people’s opinions/thoughts quite hard (I take everything to the heart), that is why I tend to keep a lot to myself (may come off as a little bit tense, secretive, mysterious). I avoid the harsh reality by daydreaming (almost every day) – imagining myself in situations far from my current circumstances. Sort of like a self-escape. I worry a lot and overthink almost everything. I am easily distracted and my attention span can be quite short. I have an internal struggle between my needs and wants. I can lack focus and be indecisive as a result – when I decide on one route, I am pulled in another direction at the same time (“But what if…”, “on the other hand...”). That is why I’m having a bit of a struggle with deciding what I want to do in the future (career-wise). I am easily overwhelmed by pressure and stress. There is a self-destructive side to me (self-critical, lack of self-confidence) that I’m working on by confronting my fears (coming out of my shell). Don’t like taking pictures, or other people taking pictures of me. I feel most content when I’ve straightened out all the details of everyday life. I have a routine, that I follow by mostly every day, and if something small changes in that routine, I start to have a small internal anxiety attack. Also, I like to do things my own way, like, when it comes to cleaning the house or organizing stuff, etc. I get triggered even if people don’t do the laundry the way I do. I guess you could describe me as a perfectionist, clean/control freak. In triggering situations I can be impulsive, spontaneous, quick to act. Quick flare-ups of anger/annoyance when being provoked on my patience. Even when I’m feeling low, I manage to find humor in life and have fun with whatever I do have. Although I tend to bottle things up, I am an emotional person and my emotions are genuine – I love and care deeply and passionately and wish no ill will upon anyone, yet it hards for me to imagine someone falling in love with me or just liking me.

Hobbies, likes: My hobbies are cleaning, writing (re-writing song lyrics, making small notes, writing stories), listening to any type of music, catching up on my favorite films and TV shows, hanging out with friends, going to the cinema, or the club, being out in nature, reading, traveling. I like history, cooking, fashion magazines (or fashion in general), road trips, spirituality, mythology, books, orange juice, previous decades, cottage-core, dark academia.

Overall: Hufflepuff. INFP-T. Bi-sexual. Pisces-Aries cusp sign. “Looks like could kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll.” A feminist, support LGBTQ+ community. That’s it, thank you!

hey @pataim ! thanks so much for sending in your request, and thank you so much for your honesty about yourself. like it takes a lot to air yourself out like that, and I admire your strength for it. but also fINALLY a 'Man from U.N.C.L.E' ship! I love that movie and attempt Illya's accent all the time, so this will be fun :)

For the MCU/Marvel - I ship you with Steve Rogers/Captain America ! 

no one can tell me that Steve doesn’t have a set routine honestly, so let me just get that out there 

he seems intimidating at first, esp as a public figure and Avenger, but Steve is nothing but passionate about what he does. so it may clash w your lack of direction, but I could honestly see him envying that a lil bit, like it’s not that you don’t have direction, it’s the fact that you still have a choice in the matter. 

your love of history put you in a museum, here you bumped into Steve in a horrible disguise. he struck up the conversation first, and once you got past the whole “holy crap that’s Captain America”, you could actually engage with him in the material and boi was he smitten 

he would love to join you when your rewatched your fave things, bc not only is he catching up on more media he missed out on, he’s also getting to know your interests in a way that’s comfortable with you. it avoids all the small talk, but leaves room for discussion after the film/show ! 

since you tend to sponge up a lot of what other people believe, it’s totally Steve who actually tries to question what you think and what you feel about things. he’s someone who encourages you to have your own opinions and to stay true to those thoughts. so while with him, you can rely on him to learn about yourself, you also gain skills for independence

overall, Steve is super patient, and despite his chaotic job as Cap, he takes comfort in his routine, and would find comfort incorporating a partner’s routine into his life. and as you grow in a relationship with him, he’s patient about teaching you how to be your own person, and helping you learn more about yourself. and while it’s uncomfortable, you grow stronger throughout being with him :) 

For The Hobbit - I ship you with Bilbo Baggins !

Bilbo is the definition of introvert, and you're right there with him

not that introversion is ever a bad thing, bc it isn't. but Bilbo is quite content to sit in his little hobbit hole and vibe. like Gandalf had to come find him, ya know. dude disappeared from his own bday.

but anyways. it's not that Bilbo lacks purpose, it's just that he's more content with a quieter life. and it seems like his quiet life would balance you out well! like the Shire is so so chill, and there doesn't really seem to be a lot of pressure on the hobbits to pick a profession. like they just genuinely do what needs to get done.

similarly, Bilbo is the type who seems a little bothered by mushy displays of affection. exhibit a: disappearing from his own bday. like he's much more the type to refill your tea when y'all are reading by the fireplace, which he would totally do w you

it will probs take you a little while to warm up to each, given just how introverted you both are. but when he explains that he has set ways of doing things, then if they're compatible w your ways of doing things, then it doesn't take you long to open up to him

like it'll be a little jarring, but he takes comfort in his routines too. and it'll be an event trying to incorporate both of your ways of life together, but he's willing to do it

overall, yours is a very quaint partnership, built on deep respect for one another. neither of you are going to push the other to do things you aren't into. and y'all just live your best lives together tbh :)

For The Man From U.N.C.L.E - I ship you with Illya Kuryakin !

I love my big Russian spy so much, so this is fun for me

so Illya is the epitome of reserved and generally quiet, so it might take a while to really break down his walls and talk to him. and he's not quite sure what to do with you once you join the team

but, he's playing his game of chess alone, and when you sit down and ask to play with him, he opens up a little more after that

if you're one who get sent out on mission with the team, get ready, bc sometimes those missions require a lot of improvising. but you'd probably be at whatever 'base' was, helping run operations from a more secure place. but Illya and Napoleon improvise a lot, leading to a lot of headaches for you and Waverly

Illya has small bursts of anger, but similar to Gaby, most times, you can intervene and he doesn't get violent. or when he does, he tries to make sure it isn't in front of you. but bc you care so deeply for him, you're there for him in the aftermath. and that's how you show your love for him.

by patching him up if he gets cut, by talking him down when he's angry. and just generally trying to take care of him. and he totally does the same for you, especially if you get sent out into the field

and much to Illya's dismay, Solo doesn't refrain form making jokes about you. but if you can take them in stride, then Solo welcomes you into the team just as well :)