#thick babes galleries

[sexy-stable-diffusion]

[raybeesmustsuck]

𝑨𝒓𝒕 𝒉𝒐𝒆;

[iloveanimechibi]

(via Cute Anime Girl, Tatekaga Kaneto by iloveanimechibi | Redbubble)

This is my Cute Anime Girl, Tatekaga Kaneto. Follow me at twitter.com/iloveanimechibi

[lifeaintsweet]

[rottiens]

⊹ ˚. GOJŌ SATORU┊18+ , consensual video recording + taking pictures, established relationship, bf gojo, unprotected sex + creampie (ofc), dirty talk, canon au. . divider creds: cafekitsune.

You struggle to stay still. With your legs stretched to aching, your flat feet crushing his bare chest and with his thick cock splitting your pussy. It's hard not to want to subtly move at least to release a little tension, when Satoru places the phone in between the two of you and fixes the camera angle talking to himself, complaining about the dim lighting in the room with the curtains closed.

He looks so focused, tongue carving his upper lip back and forth as if performing a task of utmost importance and you find it inevitable not to squeeze around him a little, impatiently.

“Babe, just take the picture,” you tell him desperately at this point, your arousal dripping down your ass cheeks onto the mattress, aching with need to start getting fucked.

Satoru, however, takes his time. He grunts, gasps and moans to himself as he pulls out of you almost completely where only the swollen head is left in your visibly fluttering hole, then proceeds to make a short video where he simulates fucking you; he thrusts his hips in a deep rotation that has your toes curling up and your breath coming in gasps into your lungs.

He plays his thumb over your clit back and forth, talking dirty to the camera before ending the video and tossing the phone to the side of the mattress which bounces gently.

“Okay, I'm ready now,” satoru chuckles releasing tension, taking one of your feet off his chest to bring it to the level of his mouth and bending his back leaves a fleeting, love-filled kiss on your ankle. “I just wanted to have something to remember you by while I'm gone.” Something more than the dozens of pictures he has in his gallery of you, you want to remind him.

Satoru begins to fuck you slow and deep, with the help of his free hand massaging your clit and spreading your juices all over your outer lips.

“I know,” your back arches seeking more of the pleasure. “It'll only be two weeks.”

“That's a long fucking time.” He thrusts his hips in such a way that your skins meet in a loud clap.

For someone whose love language was touch, you knew where that concern was coming from so this time you nod your head. Satoru settles your feet on top of his shoulders and pushes forward bending your body into a new posture, shaping you so that his cock now reaches deeper places inside you.

“Do you feel it twitching?”

“Uh huh,” you reply with your mouth open, gasping his breath sneaking inside.

“I'm going to cum soon, sorry. Recording you made me so hard.”

“We should do it more often then,” you tease, with a hint of seriousness sinking your fingers into the short hair at the nape of his neck, tangling in the white strands to manage to pull his hair and bring him closer to your mouth. Satoru groans.

“I'm going to miss you so much,” he gasps sucking on your lower lip, his teeth digging into the soft flesh to then muffle the stinging pain with his warm tongue licking it.

“I know. Me too.”

Satoru licks your mouth half open, gasps the moment your lips meet and grunts after you clench tightly around him letting him know you were going to reach your orgasm soon.

“I'm gonna fucking cum in you,” he murmurs in warning, sweaty forehead resting on yours.

“Fucking cum in me, Satoru.”

[yuvany]

⋆｡˚ ⋆ # 𝙈𝘼 𝘽𝙀𝘼𝙐𝙏É

Moments where they can't stop adoring you ;; w.c : ~ 200 / character .

pairing: ot7 enhypen x fmr ;; warning(s) : fluff+ skinship+ down bad behaviour+not proofread!

𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 always tries to make you laugh because he strongly believes that your smile could light up a dark room. Heeseung invited you over to spend time with his friends–and that’s how you found yourself cuddled up in his arms right now. You zoned out their boring conversation, turning to your phone. Your boyfriend asked if you were comfortable multiple times, and you reassured him that you were. It wasn't until you heard the group roar with laughter that you perked your head up with interest."Babe, look." He said, calming down his own laughter, and turned his phone towards you. You saw a funnily edited picture of one of his members with thick black glasses while holding up a finger, resembling a nerd emoji (🤓☝️). You burst out in giggles at the unexpected picture. "Hah, who is that even!" You exclaimed. It was obvious to everyone else in the room that Heeseung just wanted to make you laugh, because his focus immediately shifted to your laughter. When you realised that no one was laughing with you anymore, your laugh quieted down. "I have more of these." He says excitedly mostly to you while he skims through his gallery with a wide smile, searching for more memes.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆 is as much of a listener as he is a talker. Spill the recent tea to him, and he'll actively listen to what you have to say. The same goes for when you want to rant about a stray cat you might've seen, or perhaps a concert you bought the ticket for. Jay never gets tired; if anything, he finds you cute and entertaining. Let's say the two of you found yourself in his kitchen while cooking together, you were washing and chopping up vegetables while he was by the stove and oven. You spoke about your day, and he hummed along, secretly also snatching glances at you from time to time – he would've been staring at you if he wasn't scared that the pot would over boil if he wasn't looking at it. You suddenly stopped without realising, probably due to the loud noice of the water tap, or sound of the food cooking. Jay would then ask what you wanted to say. "So, I went to this cat cafe with a couple of friends, and..." You zoned out, not fully comprehending that there was more to your sentence. In which he fills you in, "you and your friends went to a cat cafe...? Was it fun, sweetie?" He inquires, getting you back on track. "Right! The cafe..." He smiles to himself when you're back in the rhythm again.

𝐒𝐈𝐌 𝐉𝐀𝐄𝐘𝐔𝐍 loves his dog, Layla, just as much as he loves you. So, there's no doubt that he'd stay silent and watch the two of you play together. By silent, I mean watching you spend time with his other life. Jake was sitting in the livingroom with Layla beside him on the couch, petting her fur while watching the TV. The sound of keys turning the door open caught both of their attention. "Hello?" You called out while shutting the door behind you, not wanting them to think you're a burglar. The familiarity of your voice had Layla sprung up from the couch and hurry towards you with Jake close behind. Before even getting the opportunity to take off your jacket, Layla was excitedly climbing your leg. You leaned down, and cooed her name as you petted her head. Jake kissed you on the cheek when he arrived, and held Layla back to give you space. You quickly hung your jacket, and neatly placed your shoes to the side before returning Jake's kiss, and turning to Layla. You sat on the floor, and patted your lap for the dog. While you spent a lot of time with the pet, Jake rested his head on his propped arm on his knee, enjoying the sight.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍 and you were at the mall together. The two of you walked hand in hand as you entered a clothing shop, Sunghoon already leading the way. Time went by, and you had walked around the shop enough times to be able to navigate with your eyes shut. Sunghoon approached you with a short pile of clothes on his arm, asking you to try it on. You sighed, knowing he won't take 'no' for an answer. He stood outside the changing room as he waited for you to step out. You walked out in the outfit he had picked for you, consisting of new pieces of clothing covering you from head to toe, literally. This man could not pick out just a top and bottom, but felt the need to hand you a hat, and a pair of shoes as well. "How do I look?" You questioned as you twirled to show him the fit. Sunghoon looked you up and down, leaning against the wall with crossed arms, and a satisfied smile. "Beautiful, as always." He replied. Sunghoon took a step forward, and adjusted the collar slightly, before taking one last look, and nodding happily. Some might say he's a fool by the awestruck look on his face, but others will argue that he's a man inlove.

𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐎𝐎 is captured by your beauty at any given moment. You will never hear him judge what you deemed as accidents or mistakes in your make-up or attire, if anything, he'd call it a new fashion trend. Sunoo takes a lot of care of his skin, so it's natural that he'd want his precious girlfriend to also beam as much as him. He loves watching you apply both skincare and makeup. You could call it a hobby of his. The way you would hold the brush and swipe it along the apples of your cheek, applying lip balm, lipstick, and gloss. He talks to you non-stop at all times. You doing makeup is no exception. You sat in front of your mirror by your vanity, and Sunoo posistioned on your bed with crossed legs saying,"You're so pretty" "Woah, that colour is gorgeous!" and so on. If you asked if he wanted to try your makeup, he'd say yes in an instant, i mean who wouldn't want their awesome girlfriend to doll him up? Sunoo leans in, with his nose scrunched, and eyes closed, and you wave your brush on his nose like a magic wand, now a soft pink spot was on his nose and cheek. "Am I pretty like you now, Y/nie?"

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍 starts to think that there's something magical about the bathroom in his house every time you stayed over –specifically the shower. It was any normal evening, you had excused yourself from the movie to take a shower–which you promised Jungwon would take maximum fifteen minutes. Well, you just happened to break that promise. By now, an hour went by, and it felt like torture for the poor boy who just wanted to snuggle with you. He heard the shower turn off, and he shifted on the sofa to watch the door swing open. You stepped out in your sleep wear, and a towel wrapped around your head. Wet droplets slid down the contours of you face from the baby hairs that stuck out. You might find it annoying, but Jungwon thinks it adds to your charisma. Something about you just looks so fresh and authentic, he wishes his brain could snap photos so that he could make a collection of you stepping out the shower with your face slightly flushed, exposing the temperature of the water, "Sorry if took a litte longer than promised, honey. Your shampoo just smells amazing." You said taking a seat beside him, and he cuddles close to you, taking in your scent. "No worries, use it as often as you want."

𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐀 𝐑𝐈𝐊𝐈 loves playing video games with you, that's no secret, everyone knows that. It didn’t matter what you guys played, he'd always let you win. You guys played Mario Cart? Riki would 'accidentally' bump into the side of the track to slow himself down. On the other hand, if you played a game that required teamwork, he'd carry you without question, and you wouldn't even notice. He's just sneaky like that. Riki would always glance over at you from time to time, just wanting to see you sat beside him on the floor, and thanking fate for binding you two together. Sometimes though, he'd watch you as if he was in a trance, examining your profile a while longer than before. His eyes traced the shape of your nose, the way you bit your tongue in concentration, and your brows, making you also turn your head, catching him in the act. You made eye contact, and he jerked his head forward again. If he heard you giggle, he'd flush in embarrassment. Even though he is flustered, all he can think about is the sheen on your face in contrast to the darker background in his room, and how pretty your focused face is. He remembers the small details on your face, like moles or freckles.

Don't spam like, as it shadow bans me

Layout credits to @flwrstqr

[lacasadelasmunecaspreciosas]

Jessica Ashley Playboy

Jessica Ashley Curvy Nude Playboy

Jessica Ashley caught my eye because her curves are THICK! This is one german babe that deserves to be gracing the pages of Playboy, and she shows off all her skin in a very tasteful but naughty gallery.

Babysitter: Alone at last, lover boy. Let’s go cuddle in your parents’ bed.

Niñera: Al fin solo, chico enamorado. Vamos a acurrucarnos en la cama de tus padres.

[lifeaintsweet]

[jakeeyyxoxoxo]

A-R-T 🌙

Pairings: Jake Sim x Reader, Jay Park x Reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 778

Song: ART by Tyla

Part 1| Part 2|

His eyes travelled your body as you laid still on the bed, he has studied your body. Every curve and peeled back every layer, hoping to see more. You were his muse, he painted you in 50 shades and hues. He used every medium he could find to showcase you. You were his A-R-T.

“That’ll be all today”, Jay spoke softly; as he put down his paint brush, “Just 2 more sessions and we’ll be done”. His art studio was huge, very spacious. One could hear their own echo even when whispering. There were paintbrushes and art supplies everywhere. It was messy but you believed that was the way the mind of an artist worked.

You were a portrait model that caught his eye just from looking at one picture from your portfolio. For his painting, he wants to crave your sensuality on the canvas. You’ve posed for him 3 times already.

“Thank God”, you giggled, “laying on that mattress was starting to get uncomfortable”. You wrapped yourself in the slik sheet that was originally draped over your body for the painting. You made sure to expose nothing while remaining sensual. “Where did u get that thing?”, you questioned as you fixed you afro. It had flattened due to laying on it for so long.

“I found it on the sidewalk”, he smiled as he dropped his paintbrushes into the cleaning solution. Your eyebrows shot up as you gasped at the information. “Jay! You could’ve told me that’, you yelled, jokingly.

A knock was heard as you both turned to face the direction of the sound. There stood a tall male with a warm small on his face. Jay watched the way your eye lit up as they met Jake’s. He studied your face, all he wanted was to make you his A-R-T.

You waddled over to him, making sure not to drop the sheet, you didn’t want people seeing you undies. “Babe!”, you squealed as he pulled you into his arms. Jake was here to pick you from your gig, as he always was. Never late and always on time. “How was it love?”, he asked.

“It’s nothing new babe”, you stated, “I just lay there for hours”. He thought it was cute how much you loved what you do. Jake’s eyes remained on you but he couldn’t help but feel the other male’s stare on him. “I know babe; I just wanna make sure you had a lovely day”.

“It’s okay, I’m gonna get changed and I’ll be back”, you smiled; leaning in to put a small kiss on his cheek before waddling away. They both watched you go around the corner to the bathrooms. The atmosphere slightly thickened as Jay turned his portrait away from Jake.

This caused Jake to raise an eyebrow, he always thought Jay was little off. Only you and Jay had seen the portraits of you, Jake never saw them. He never doubted you but he never trusted Jay.

“So when are the portraits going to be showcased?”, Jake asked. Keeping his distance from the other gentleman, He was just holding friendly conversation. Jay answered; completely unbothered by Jake awkwardness. “When I decide to showcase them”.

“Isn���t 4 enough?”, Jake continued. Jay turned to face him as he listened to him talk, “It’s kinda getting weird at this point”.

“I mean you’ve been painting her for the last couple years for an exhibit but not one of her portraits have been in a gallery”. It burned Jay hearing someone else speak on his art especially when they knew not what they spoke of.

“Don’t insert yourself into something that doesn’t involve you”, Jay responded softly. He scoffed as he stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets, “My art has nothing to do with you”.

“This is between y/n and I”, he finished as you walked in. You looked between the two; it looked they were having some exchanges. Everytime you left these two alone by the time you come back the atmosphere is just thick and suffocating.

“Are you ready love?”, Jake asked. You nodded taking his hand you both headed towards the exit. However, Jay’s words were stuck in Jakes head.

“This is between Y/n and I”

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

It was 4:43am; Jay sat in art studio. There was only one light and it easy very dim. He sat on the floor of his chilly studio; surrounded by every portrait of you that he has painted. They brought peace to him, you were his piece. With his hands he would be able to paint the most beautiful Portrait. You were his A-R-T.

“He has no idea”, he mumbled; picking up his wine glass, “His mind is too small to grasp the gem he has”.

[moregraceful]

Got tagged for WIP wednesday by @puckpocketed it is not Wednesday but I do not care bc I am feeling chatty...also I don't have a WIP in the sense of a project so much as my life is a WIP but what are our lives but a WIP in the meta narrative of the universe.....anyway

First of all, I just watched an entire 25 minute youtube video of a woman talking through her swatches of glitter paint...HATE the internet's pivot towards video but LOVE her narrating how strong paint smells and the various thicknesses of the glitter. I enjoy a video where someone is talking through their process tbh, like I did this and got this result and I felt this way about it -- for me as a hobbyist I find that helpful. Anyway I just bought some glitter paint so we are going to glitter! that! diva (Bryce Harper)! up!....I do feel a LITTLE bad about editing someone else's art but it's just a print and I think it was initially a wall mural so. It's fine. It's transformative (glitter). Anyway I call that a WIP I guess, because I had to do research on glitter paint.

The other creative project I am "working" "on" (toasting on high in the toaster oven of my mind) is a tanger/ek65 zine..thing....I don't want to go into detail bc I don't. have any??? but it involves French poetic forms, Canadian-French translation by idlt (and a ton of research by them too!!) and also I challenged myself to dig into the truly mindboggling amount of dark blue paper I found while unpacking. Don't know why I bought it. time to use it

BUT THE REAL WIP IS MY APARTMENT!! It is Becky SZN imminently which has been a good need-to-get-things-in-order push. Even with the free Ikea furniture debacle, things are coming along. Guest room mostly put together and I will put up art once I get the excess furniture out of there, and then once I get the flowers up on the wall, it'll basically be done. I have a guy coming to hang shelves in the kitchen on Monday, so that will help me be able to assess what needs to happen in the kitchen-dining room area with storage bc it's been kind of chaotic for two straight months. I'm hoping any storage or organization problems that develop after the shelves get hung will be fixable with an Ikea or Target trip.

Gallery in the dining room area:

DO NOT TALK TO ME ABOUT SPACING I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT I discovered like half the wall is studs and it threw my entire plan into chaos...those top three pieces are held up with command strips and a dream lol. Featuring art by @mysticaltramping made for my dad, nature acrylics by one of my oldest friends J, reproductions from the Arcana League Tarot (some of my all time favorite baseball art!!), a couple of Celia Connaire woodblock pieces of Gritty, a Mattchuk watercolor by Wade who I have no idea how or where to link, a couple of photo prints from Society6, my favorite photo I've taken of Oracle Ballpark, picture of Babe Ruth that used to hang in my office and tho I don't really care about Babe Ruth, it's big enough to fill out space, and a reproduction of a London Underground ad that I have had since I think I was...6 years old??? that our neighbors at the time brought home for me after a trip to England. Aside from spacing I do like how the wall turned out considering how much I complained about hanging it.

I have a TK in a glitter frame imminent but he's going on the art wall in the art nook. Bryce is also going in the art nook and he is going to be a nightmare to frame bc he's 14x18 I think and I really do want something dramatic so it's going to be stupidly expensive. but that's the price we pay for an emotionally dysregulated primadonna I suppose.

There's other stuff I need to figure out in the house but it's getting closer and closer to be less of a chaotic WIP and more just small projects to work on, which I'm glad about. People keep reminding me I've only had my stuff with me for 2 months and I've only been in Philly for 3 months so it's literally okay, but I like nesting and I like not living in an apartment with boxes everywhere lmao.

I take a lot of inspiration on homemaking and nesting from a tumblr post from years ago where op said they wanted a house where it was clear the owner was a wacko and their stuff is haunted...like a great deal of this stems from the Agonies but I really do not thrive in a house with muted, dark, calm colors...if it's not exhausting to look at and overstimulating to be in the same room as then I don't want it frankly. I'm not on this earth to be the model of how you should decorate a house as an adult I'm here to have fun and not worry too much <- said while drinking out of a oversize sippy cup with a megalodon on it.

[pvke-princess]

sickie scenario for everyone that happened last night that I would have enjoyed if it weren't happening to me. 😍

my sweet bf was over last night and started feeling tired earlier than usual, then started feeling sick (🤤 * me excited fr*, but also sad :((( ). it was like 9:30 ish so it wasn't super early, or very late, keep this in mind. he kinda was nauseous and id went to the bathroom w him when he tried to puke lol but he didn't

so we're laying in bed and im enjoying my sick babe while he sleeps uuuuuntilllll the neighbor on the other side of my bedroom wall decides to hang up what seemed to be a fucking gallery. apt walls are not that thick, and 9:30 / 10 seems too late to be doing that 😭 ofc it woke up my bf and he had a hoooooorrible time falling asleep again.

literally prime sickie scenario but idk I felt so bad this time he just wanted to sleep 😭

[j-nipper-95]

I really need to sort a non-ASR banner for non-ASR related stuff. A future problem for a future Jess.

Thank you so much for the tags the last couple of weeks everyone! I have been writing, I just haven’t got around to responding and sharing 🙈 in fact, I was telling Ashton this week, the El Dorado AU fic has surpassed 56k already … we’re going for an Epic on this one, folks. An hour and a half film for inspiration? Psh, try a book that could be verging into Samantha Shannon levels of thickness, that’s the level of detail and chaos we’re dealing with with this fic. Please God don’t let this become a ‘Roots of Chaos’ length fic. I’m not sure I have the capacity to write an Epic that long 🥲

That being said, have some words. (Simon POV)

The gun shot echoes throughout the entire gallery.

“Go,” I whisper harshly, shoving Baz away from the office towards the entrance to the gallery.

We head back towards the marble stairs we walked up a few minutes ago, and start creeping down them as quietly as we can. The soles of my shoes are softened through wear, but of course Baz has his Oxford’s on, so his heels are clicking with every single step.

“You and your fucking shoes,” I hiss.

“Now’s not the time, Snow.”

“Now’s the perfect fucking time. I swear to God, if we get caught because they fucking hear you—”

The office door slams against the wall upstairs and for a split second I’m torn between just stopping and waiting quietly, to see if they come our way, or just making a break for it.

Baz chooses the second option.

He tucks the map beneath his shirt, and slips the ring onto his little finger, before he grabs my hand and pulls me along.

For the second time in a month, we’re running away from the Now Next.

I am absolutely loving writing this fic. It’s been such a process from start to where we’re at currently (lord knows we’re nowhere near the finish with this one), and it’s really testing my writing skills. I’m such a combo planner/pantser, more leaning to the planner side of things usually. But this fic has just taken me by the throat and gone ‘we’re going this way’ and I’ve just had to follow the inspiration wherever it takes me!

Currently I’m in a bit of a writer’s block phase, but here’s hoping that won’t last too long.

Tagging (and I know some of you have already shared today, but I just love everything you’re working on right now, so sharing the love!): @artsyunderstudy @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @aristocratic-otter @bazzybelle @blackberrysummerblog @bookish-bogwitch @cattocavo @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @cutestkilla @dragoneggos @erzbethluna @ebbpettier @fatalfangirl @frjsti @henreyettah @hushed-chorus @ileadacharmedlife @ivelovedhimthroughworse @krisrix @larkral @letraspal @martsonmars @nightimedreamersworld @orange-peony @prettylightsbigcity @palimpsessed @phoxphyre @raenestee @skeedelvee @stardustasincocaine @subparselkie @theearlgreymage @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[hannahssimblr]

Chapter Six (Part 3)

The day rolls on, and by afternoon my head is spinning. It feels like I’ve been everywhere in Dublin and I’ve seen everything too, we’ve had ice cream from the best ice cream shop in the city, we’ve been through the science gallery and played around with the optical illusions, we’ve gone into all the fancy little shops that we don’t have out in the country, and by the time we finally stop in the park to watch the ducks my feet are throbbing from all the walking and my tummy is sore from laughing. 

They reminisce about something that happened to them on their school tour one year as we lounge on the mown grass, and I think, after spending hours with them now, that they might be two of the most entertaining people I’ve ever met. They never seem to second guess what they’re saying or think too hard about it, and they’ve got a really good way of bringing a joke back around again and again, making it somehow funnier each time. They genuinely want to know about me too, and I tell them all about school and the things I like to do for fun. I don’t think that I’ve ever felt as important or as comfortable as I do when I talk to them. I feel as though I could say anything at all and they wouldn’t even bat an eyelid. 

We’re all laughing after I tell them an embarrassing story about a time I was in the changing room of a clothes shop and accidentally tried on someone else’s top that they already owned, and I have to pause for a second to take it in. “I’ve honestly never told anyone that before” I confess.

“What?” Jen shrieks “Why not? That is hilarious.”

“Because it’s too embarrassing! People would think I was weird for doing that.”

“Nah, people would think that you’re really funny, and that’s an awkward but normal human thing to do.” Jude says. 

“Babe, I hate that you have to think like that about yourself. You’re really great.” Jen smiles at me, and I wonder what Kelly meant when she said that she was awful. I like her a lot. “Honestly, we wouldn’t be hanging out if you weren’t. We’re very picky.” She winks at Jude and he grins. Something inside me does a little flip and suddenly it’s hard to look at him, it’s like I’m looking into the sun. I’m not really sure what this feeling I keep getting around him is or if I like the way that it feels, but I know that I’ve never felt anything like it before. 

Before we go home that evening, Jen announces that she has to go to the bathroom, and I catch a mischievous glint in Jude’s eye, one that I’ve come to recognise during the day and I wonder what big idea he has. 

“You should have a posh wee.” He says conspiratorially. “We should all go.”

“What’s a posh wee?” I giggle, and he points to a hotel across the road from us, and I know it’s the Shelbourne, the most expensive luxury hotel in town. 

Jen takes my hand and I am swept across the road to it. It’s felt like this all day, like I’m just getting swept along without ever knowing what’s about to happen. I end up just surrendering to it and seeing what happens next. “Have you ever seen their toilets?” She asks me. “They’re the fanciest toilets you’ll ever lay eyes on.”

“Do you two do this all the time or something?!”

We run up the steps and through the doors of the hotel and I am in awe of it. The tile floors gleam, reflecting the light of the grand chandeliers that are suspended from the ceiling, and there are marble pillars lining the hall and huge round bouquets of white flowers arranged beautifully on ornate wooden tables. I would have never dared to come in here unless I was a paying guest, but Jude breezes right past the doorman without hesitation and we follow him. I heard before that if you have enough confidence you will get away with anything, and now I’ve seen that it’s true. 

And the toilets are fancy. The floors and the mirrors gleam like they’ve just been polished, and the hand towels are those thick, soft paper ones that you feel bad about throwing into the bin after you’re done with them. There are even little bottles of hand cream and perfume by the sink. I spray some on my wrist and sniff it, imagining that I’m a grown up woman with a lot of money who could afford to stay in a hotel like this one. When I catch sight of myself in the mirror I think to myself that I look different than before, it’s something in my eyes that I can’t pin down, it’s like they look bigger and more alive. My cheeks are pink and bits of my hair are flying around out of place, but I can almost see something sparkle within me, and for the first time ever I allow a tiny little thought to come to the front of my mind: Do I look… pretty?

“I found something.” Jude says when Jen and I come out of the bathroom. 

“Oh God.” She complains, but we follow him across the hall and up a huge curved staircase anyway. Now I really feel like a fugitive, and I keep looking over my shoulder to check if somebody is going to kick us out, but the place is totally empty, and nobody seems to be coming. 

The sound of music floats down the stairs and I have a feeling that it has something to do with where we’re headed. We dash across the soft carpeted landing and Jude stops us outside a pair of huge double doors where the music is emanating from. He leans into one of them and slowly pushes it open, letting yellow light spill out onto the carpet. 

“Wha-” I begin, but he stops me. “Don’t ask, just come in.” And we do. 

“Jude…” Jen says when we shut the door behind us and we realise what we’re looking at. “This is someone’s wedding party.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He walks straight over to a table of champagne and takes a glass in each hand. “I can’t drink and drive today, so these are for you two.”

“You have some audacity.” Jen hisses, but I can tell that she thinks this is kind of funny too. “We’re sticking out like sore thumbs, everyone will know we’re not part of this bloody wedding!” 

“Let’s see how long it takes them to notice then.” 

Jen rolls her eyes and clinks her champagne flute against mine. “I guess we’re in it now.” She shrugs as if to say what can you do? We both take a drink, and I think that this champagne might be the nicest alcoholic drink I’ve ever tasted, and probably ever will taste for the rest of my life. I bet it’s hundreds of euros for a bottle of this stuff. 

The band starts to play an Elvis song, and the next thing I know I am being pulled onto the dancefloor and the three of us are laughing and dancing together, looking so out of place in our runners and shorts in the middle of a formal crowd, but surprisingly I don’t care how it looks. I am having so much fun today that I think I might burst from happiness. 

Jude takes my hands and twirls me around, singing the lyrics to the song in a silly Elvis voice. He keeps crashing and bumping me into people near us and they are turning around to stare at us angrily which somehow makes this all so much funnier. 

Your kisses lift me higher, like a sweet song of a choir, you light my morning sky… He holds me in the ballroom dancing style with one hand on my waist, and then I have another one of those electric moments. When we’re close like this for the first time I can really look into his eyes, and watch the way their warm golden brown colour, flecked with amber catches all the lights in the room. His skin, which was beautiful from afar, is just as perfect up close, and he has a little sprinkling of freckles on his nose that make me want to reach out and touch him. I imagine he really means the lyrics that he’s singing along to, and catch myself wondering what it might be like if I were to let him kiss me. 

And just like that he’s gone. He’s let go of me and now he’s dancing with Jen, not even realising the disturbance he’s caused within me, and I have to stand there and find my bearings again, feeling a strange absence and longing in the parts of my waist and my wrists and all of the other places where his hands had touched me moments ago. Oh Shit. I think.

Prev // Next

[archerygun]

We had a shitty makeshift gallery for my grandma and it was awesome.

My grandma’s always been disappointed that she couldn’t get higher education (especially higher education in art) because “It just wasn’t what you did back then.” (she got married quite young which meant she had to take up a lot of jobs immediately after getting out of school).

She’s said a few times that she feels like people think she’s stupid because she spent a lot of time teaching kids with special needs and people thought it meant she was too thick to teach ‘normal’ kids. And she somehow refuses to acknowledge how great of a painter she is like babe. I take Art GCSE. I’ve SEEN the average person’s painting ability.

So in the February half term we all dressed up like posh guests and blu-tacked her recent paintings to the wall, then we all walked around pretending we were at a very prestigious exhibition. She was equal parts flattered and embarrassed, so mission successful. My 10-year-old cousin was very happy to pretend to be a rich, snooty woman coming to buy the whole lot with her 50p coin.

This is the woman who insists she can’t paint, lads.

We’ve tried to tell her lmao. We’ve tried our best.

We had a great night and everyone got really drunk except me and the kids, and then someone broke a glass and we had to evacuate. 10/10.

[lifeaintsweet]

THICK ASIANS