#they should not let me have knives
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Posting this for my own record of all the times I cut the tip of my finger off
#no more finger#first time was 2020 in a meat slicer#second time was today#I was mincing dehydrated peppers and I angled the knife instead of moving it and got less of a fingernail as a reward#I’ve also sliced the top of my big toe off too#two weeks ago I cut my pinky knuckle to the bone#they should not let me have knives#uhh how do trigger warnings work#knives#bodily harm
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watching Rivals i thought this was a silly little drama about rich people in the 80s why am I sobbing
#episode 5 has broken me#lizzie brought tears to my eyes when she turned down freddie but im actually full on sobbing at daysee#she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this she doesnt deserve this#'are you certain you didnt lead him on' im going to kill everyone. i dont care any more. mass homicide. i love you daysee you deserve better#the way he switched up the second she named a name. i literally despise tony fucking baddingham. more than rupert.#and thats saying something you should have seen what i was saying about him in the earlier episodes#im not ok. let the women be happy let them be happy let daysee be happy let lizzie be happy LET WOMEN WIN#genuinely had to take a break when he said that line. it fucking broke me. 'i know youre a team player' die in hole explode knives knives kn#rivals#disney rivals
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Template by @juni38
Im going to be completely frank with you all... and admit that I read these options and wasn't sure how to take this chart,,, so uh. Under the cut is Another Version. I'd apologize but I've given you the option to keep scrolling ¯\_(・・)_/¯
(If you notice characters missing on Kim's side, I probably figured she doesn't know who they are lol)
For the record,,, if they *wanted* me to pull their hair-- *is shot several times before I can continue*
Uhh Matthew is here because I have been converted fully on he/him or enby lesbian Matthew I think. He lives in my brain rent free now, very gender. I'd pull his hair but also I think he mostly just deserves to have it played with nicely.
And Scott's here because 1) I enjoy trans Scott, 2) Kim Pine Brain Rot possibly, 3) idk he's like,, the exception. God damnit, I've fallen for the inexplicable Scott Pilgrim Effect. What the fuck--
I did think about doing this chart like everyone was actually applicable to my tastes, but even if they were I think the ones I didn't put up would have to fall on the caress side bc I just don't feel that way abt them lol.
Again, not to say that's the case for the gals over on that side,,, I just think I would want to be gentle w them shxkdjsdhbd with the exception for Lynette who probably deserves to have her hair pulled, but again I fear she would Hurt Me,,, but maybe in a fun way,,,
Anyway No One Look At Me....
(,, also,,, Ramona is so far over bc I think she would enjoy it,, otherwise she'd be closer to Kim in that section. Same thing w Roxie)
If anyone actually looks at this version, I'm not opposed to doing a version like this for Kim btw! Just ask for it so I feel like I'm not just Dropping This and scurrying away
#sp comic#meme#kim pine#id tag more people but i Do Not Have The Strength....#also i like Living and I think the idea of more people seeing the suggestively taken one makes me want to Die a little#(not to say you cant reblog this or whatever im just being dramatic shdjejsdhdhgdd I am generally a fairly Reserved person)#for the kim chart- i based my other scott placement on the interaction theyve had here! i think if they interacted for real or more often +#+ he'd end up definitively in the Pull Roughly suggestion with most people#ooc#he maybe if i finish edits for everyone i could try this w the au stuff. kit's thoughts might be different here...#hey*#also let me know if i forgot anyone??? i thought abt including the robots but. no hair. and gideon the cat has Fur so. on technicality-#but like barring parents and peter i think i got most people#i guess if lainey was here she'd go somewhere in the middle or right? w/out knowing what she'd be like#FUCK I DIDNT MEAN TO POST THIS. I MEAN IT'S HERE NOW SO IM NOT REMOVING IT BUT I AM S C R E A M I N G I WASNT READY#ah i forgot crash and the boys actually. thats why i wasnt supposed to post this yet#uhhhh Pull Roughly for like all of them. except trasha. trasha gets head pats and a juice box#except for on Kim's chart. on Kim's chart she's in the pull roughly section I can't lie to myself. she hates that kid 😭 also on that note +#+ knives should probably be in the middle section. like she wants to pull it for her having copped her style and being stupid abt scott.#but I didn't put her there bc I feel like even if she wants to she wouldn't ya know? knives is a Precious Angel after all
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vash w this hairstyle is literally so cute.. .. wolfwood matchies or smt T__T
#litearlly dont talk 2 me i saw the knives panel again and smashed everuthing inmy room and set myself on fire#am i wrong 4 thinking that he shouldve had a little more time.am i wrong for thinking this guy.having lived in terrible fear#his whole life 4 what he thought could happen 2 him. to his brother. DID happen 2 his sister#should be able 2 experience some happiness and comfort for once#like yeah the guy killed hundreds of thousands SUREE ok.AND??? let the guy breathe a little#BAHAHA no i think i do still agree w the ultimate ending of him using the last of his energy 2 generate that apple tree#its sweet and i do like the sentiment it was just. Too.soon after it was literally right after#and im like coughing and hacking and wishing.that he and vash couldve spent those few months living (somewhat) peacefully#and secluded.before everything that happened#i guess there is a bittersweet tinge to knives dying before vash woke up / could say gbye but idk.i just grieve 4 this guy#even if a clean redemption isnt like#feasible in a sense U KNOW!!!!!!! but then again i dont think. satisfying endings have to be clean cut and perfect#like he doesnt have to be redeemed i think. not everyone needs Redemption as it exists in its current form#&& i do think that even after all he did.comma.he wasnt entirely wrong?like you cant rly blame him 4 rejecting coexistence#based on the way plants have historically been treated (assuming he also telepathized with exploited plants after the great fall)#though not to say that his decisions/methodology is right ykwim#and i know yeaa yeaa there was a lot of hypocrisy in how he used the other plants 2 amass power#ok this is literally getting too convoluted there r so many conditional aspects to this but long story short i do thnk he deserved.#a little something at the end;______; even if just 4 me to see art of them together post-final arc .#< me dragging my knuckles in the sand w open wounds or smth#sry vash post turned into knives sadblogging EHAHEHA but its like the nature of this^ guys life anyways LMAO#trigun spoilers#trigun maximum#trigun#vash
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oh my god ! haha . anyway a bit buzzed perhaps. anyway here's what happened on the date
#at some point i took the earrings off. the metal clanging was screaming their name too loud and it#was 6 knives to the throat and he confirmed it so. here's the kicker. you can be taught a lot and you can have their hands on your thighs#and you can kiss them but even if they pray even if they tell you about the bible looking into you like really they lost what they believed#in a pennsylvania countryside catholic schools with a protestant family since joining the london school of economics#even if they pray for you to stay the whole way even though their hair was softer than hers you think of her and he thinks of someone else#and be tells you none of it will make sense. they smile and they say what a shame you might miss the train but they hold onto you#the entirety of you - like a religion or a polite insistence or something to keep.#you learned they were used to losing everyone they felt bound to love. they said they got really good at letting go. you were told#you think he's being epistemologically#irresponsible and he tells you he carries a massive task. he tells you the responsibility is monumental#and he feels responsible for defining responsibility. he shows you songs and his poetry. my eyes feel on fire.#she doesnt know this. this is marylebone. the next station is edgeware road. everyone here looks happy and high and clear of the doors.#he says tell me when you get to the station and very especially tell me if you don't. the next station is paddington. please mind the gap#between the train and the platform. you say this to him. he says i minds the gap between you and i. i mind it so much that i need you to#come back. he says this because you kissed him briefly but you kissed him well. she says you're a good kisser but he says you have him#stunned. he asks you who decides the truth. he tells you you decide the truth without his mouth. you're fast enough to make it there before#the wheels do. this world is lit by glass and light and people with a pact to fall in love with the abstractions more than each other.#he tells you to be committed to your various intangible loves more than anyone. you both have to be. they love each other anyway.#i was supposed to find a persian poetry book with her on our fourth date except she was hours late. i found it with him. he didnt give up#he should be perfect and i should really like him.
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Hi! As someone who now kinda wants to check out Trigun because of the hype, do you recommend that I can start with Stampede? Or do I really need to watch the OG anime first to better understand/enjoy it? Thank you! 🙋🏻♀️
you can start with stampede! i'd say knowing the context of the original enhances the experience but isn't necessary to enjoy the show. I would consider stampede more viewer-friendly, especially for those of us who are used to modern storytelling conventions (the original suffers the consequences of general writing trends in anime at the time it was produced and of the fact that it was produced long before the manga was finished, so the story is somewhat disjointed and has a lot of filler which makes it REALLY hard to get into.) if you do end up liking stampede, however, I'd suggest trying out watching at least SOME of the original because it adds a lot of cool nuance and context to the story that stampede tells!
#your only REAL handicap is that you're missing out on references that clue you into the context of the story early on#and quite a few references in the finale. but none of those references are hugely necessary to understand the plot so you should be fine!#i didn't DISLIKE the origial and like i said im glad i watched it first but it was. REALLY hard to get into.#even as someone who understands writing trends & enjoys a lot of older anime trigun is. a product of its time.#there's almost no context given for the story you're witnessing until a good 20 episodes in.#the main villain isn't named at all until halfway through the runtime#and even TWO EPISODES BEFORE THE FINALE i still did not have enough information to fully understand what the hell was going on#vash was going into the final fucking battle and i still didn't know what knives WAS let alone what the fuck he WANTED#not to mention nick was FULLY DEAD and i still didnt know what his deal was. like ok go off king have ur moment bleeding out in the church#but can you EXPLAIN WHATS GOING ON BEFORE YOU SUCCUMB TO THE BLOOD LOSS PLEASEEEEEEEE GOD#stampede does that whole thing WAY better imo. it sprinkles the backstory more naturally throughout the show#again. part of this is 90s writing conventions. but there's only so much i can take fr#it was like comparable to evangelion in terms of LACK OF CONTEXT#anyways. this isnt supposed to be me complaining about the original. it had its moments. i watched 24 episodes of it like it was not BAD#but like. i think the story really benefits from the way that stampede chooses to lay everything out. is what im saying.#tldr watch them in whatever order but if you like stampede try the original#you might not like it more than stampede but you WILL feel cool when you realize how it all relates to stampede#asks#vash is also WAAAAAY sexier in stampede. HOWEVER. the women of the show are like 10 times sexier in the original. so. pick your poison ig
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70% of my trigun thoughts are abt how plants (independent and dependant) work and what they symbolize and their relationships with other characters and the world and stuff and the implications of independent plants coming with the earth forces and what it says about how earth has progressed since SEEDS left the planet, 20% of my thoughts are "hope those guys (meryl milly vash livio ww knives) are having fun" and 10% is rotating trimax Rem Saverem around in my head at all times
#i think abt rem a lot for a character that is like important but also isnt materially present in the story much#like idk her relationship with grief and regret and the idea of her looking at the shambles of her life and having to say#'well at least i can start over since theres nothing left for me' multiple times (after alex dies and she joins seeds#and after failing to keep tesla alive and getting a 'second chance' with vash and knives) idk its just so fascinating to me#and her idea of a blank ticket to the future and what it means in terms of how vash shapes his worldview in trimax#where it seems to be about how. death stops all future potential of a person. if they die they can never get better they dont learn#they cant change and experience consequence#like smth i find fascinating in trimax is that vash doesnt kill people but he will let somebody that person has hurt punch them in the face#and he thanks ww for killing to save the colony that one time. hes not opposed to killing/consequence entirely#i think it comes down a lot to how rem behaved in the aftermath of him finding out about tesla. how the potential for things to get better#would have died with him or rem and it would have just stayed horrible#idk idk im Rambling im turing things around in my brain#also man my main complaint with the manga is i wish it focused on the dependant plants more. they clearly experienced a big emotional#struggle esp in the final volumes and i wish we got to see more of it#but also i just like the wacky small town hijinks esp in the 98 anime i love when the main cast is just goofin around. i think they should#get to goof more#trigun#.txt#Dont Look At This Post Man its EMBARRASSING nobody should let me talk abt anything#the secret special bonus tjoughts are about chronica bc she fascinates me but i cant draw her good the way i can draw meryl and rem :(
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very interested in the type of training ada does to develop her fighting style
#speakerphone!#obvs shes working with knives. i would argue shes likely on krausers level if not above him.#there is a flip she does in 6 that makes me think shes got some strong gymnastics training#how she lifts her legs up in damnation tells me she has incredible core strength (evident in her body control when using the grapple gun)#the power in her kicks is on par with leons and its only increased when used in combinations w hookshot.#frankly so much of her fighting style tells me she should also be fucking huge. but alas she is a woman and capcom is not going to let women#be anything other than thin with curves.#i guess i can see that as a spy she doesnt want to be HUGE so she doesnt draw attention while on missions. but also? shes a character made#by people w real world biases including misogyny. so. that point is kinda moot.#you know who else i dont think is thin and curvy? jill. in my head shes got very broad shoulders and very muscular arms#(evidenced by her ability to hold the plasma rifle and gun) (and obvs theres no way she can hold it as a human. but if she could she'd have#huge arms and broad shoulders) and that is my truth‼️‼️‼️
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youtube
i like the kelp too
#.............................................#..............................................................................#......................#.....#i think if he was right in front of me i would kill him and i dont know if im okay with that#not that i want him to live no. that i would feel that way.#i like being a cleric because i dont really like hurting people. ill do it if people hurt me but i never seek it out#but i think if it was just me and him i would tear his throat out with my teeth like a wild animal and that scares me more than him#... does that make me a bad person?#i dont want it to be like that#no he hurt my friends. he made them hurt me. so hating him is okay.#i just cant let it define me. im not letting my rage or hate define me. im lucy frostblade and im nice and sad and thats ok#and thats okay. i think thats okay. and i mean that#and even if i do get scared i have friends. ruvina can you believe that? i have friends.#the high five heroes are still here but i also have baron and bee and miss gukgak and tracker and kristen#i have friends. my god loves me. im okay. i think im actually okay.#well. not fully and i dont think ill ever be fully okay ever again#but i think even thats okay. i should actually try in therapy i think#im still scared but when i turn my back on whats scaring me i dont see more scary things anymore#there arent more knives in the dark#there are hands and i can take them and be okay#im okay. and im not lying.
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hmm. had an actual conversation with nightmare coworker today that seemed mutually productive. she apologized for saying some bullshit that hurt my feelings and i clarified that my intentions are to help not to undermine her, and we both agreed that there's no competition against each other and that it's the lack of growth in our role that's the problem. it was...productive.
and further cementing for me that it is time to begin making my Exit. i will be sending out my resume to a few places this weekend.
i'm still processing the conversation, and am struggling to place myself in where i am responsible to better my behavior. because i genuinely don't want to be an ass, even though i really don't like this lady and will jump for joy the day i never have to see her again. she stated that she knows my intentions aren't to hurt her, and that she thinks i'm very kind. i apologized for if my behavior came off as undermining her, and said that my intentions are only to better my own growth—and that i know she's trying to succeed too. i validated her feelings, and complemented the effort she is putting in.
where i'm struggling with is: am i in the wrong/causing harm and needing to change if the issue is that her feelings are incongruent with what she knows of my intentions? her feelings are her responsibility (WOW i almost typed "her feelings are my responsibility". i feel like that's a freudian slip) and she states that she knows i don't mean to hurt her. i'm going to try to be more clear in wording my intentions with her (she feels like me trying to take work off her plate is to undermine her. when really, i'm caught up and see her getting overwhelmed, and i want to help and also have something to do since i'm bored).
but i'm really struggling to look at my role in this and pass judgement on myself. i can and want to do better, and i don't think i did anything wrong, but i'm always so hesitant to say it's not my fault or i didn't do something bad. like i can't trust my judgement on that. my intentions were good, her bad feelings are ones caused by her insecurities, which she more or less has expressed to be aware that they are not true—the hurtful thing she said to me, she acknowledged was said out of hurt and not what she actually thinks. so, is it fair to say i'm not the bad guy? i'm not in the wrong? i know good intentions that still result in harm don't absolve anyone, but when the things that are clashing are insufficient communication and reactive insecurities... i'm not a monster, am i?
#well. i AM probably a monster for how much i dislike this lady#but i don't ACT on it#and i genuinely couldn't care less about her. i participate in decent human pleasantries because i am a decent human.#and at work we're stuck together#the thing that's irked me so much about this conversation is just.. her self centeredness#that she thinks everyone is out to get her. to undermine her. whatever.#bitch nobody cares about you enough one way or the other to put in that kind of effort. i sure don't#i empathize but i do not sympathize. to feel that pit that makes you feel like the worst kind of center of attention#i get it. but genuinely you are not the main character and no one is going to spend their limited time and energy to slowly attack you#you are not the cat with all the knives pointed at it#it's a terrible feeling to feel like you are! but when it influences your behavior to the point that you are making snide comments#to people who have no option not to interact with you then uh. then you're in the wrong buddy#and the people around you (who cannot easily leave! bc work!) should not have to bend over backwards to assure you#that they're not pointing knives at you. to protect themselves from your feelings making you say mean shit#like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to#modify my behavior from is NOT one that a regular well adjusted person would take as anything but kind#and if a regular well adjusted person got a little offput by me volunteering to take work off their hands we would've had a very chill#3 sentence conversation about it MONTHS AGO.#i understand and respect (even if i find it annoying and overbearing) the need for me to announce my intentions like im working in a kitchen#and saying 'hot water' or 'knife' as i move around other people but we shouldn't have reached this conclusion this way#and frankly who's to fucking say me being more clear with my intentions will only feed the flames of her thinking i'm out to get her!#'i caught up on my stuff and your plate looks full. i'm bored. anything i can do to help?' could be a pointed knife for all i know!!#and if it is- and my actions still hurt her in that scenario- am i still responsible for the hurt caused??#like WHERE DOES IT FUCKING E N D ?#personal#*exhales* okay i feel better now#i just hate talking about my interactions with her bc i just want NOTHING to do with it. i want her out of my head!!#but until i process it i can't let go#and i'm still going to have to go over all of this with my shrink tomorrow#it just makes me mad how much of my time this bitch takes up. i'm not getting paid to think about work right now!!!!
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Quick question, has anyone been in the mood to write a TriStamp Knives and Tessla fic with all the new concept info? Like seriously, Knives had to deal with 149 years with an annoying shit of a older sister constantly pestering him with self-care (Did you even see the bags under his eyes?) or not treating Conrad like a nuisance at most. And of course, if the Plant Snuggie is alive, then Tess has every right to wrap him up in a murder burrito or tumble him in the eye-dome like a washing machine whenever he gets particularly cranky or powertrippy. And bonus points if Conrad (and/or Legato) get to see Knives, the self-proclaimed superior being, get manhandled by his own clothes like a feral kitten.
#trigun#trigun stampede#trigun spoilers#trigun stampede spoilers#trigun knives#trigun tesla/tessla#william conrad#legato bluesummers#Of course Conrad should be aware that Tessla's still alive#but I have my doubts on Legato...#unless his Trolley Problem w. the Sandsteamer is meant to work for both of them?#Let WW save the ship his brother Livio and orphanage to show he has a heart and betray EoM (Tessla)#Or destroy the orphanage and Livio to show his allegiance to EoM and get Vash to Julai (Knives)#Either or he had plausible deniability if the second plan succeeded w. Zazie...And possibly escape the very real threat of Tessla's wrath#But do what you want with that little theory#Writing block is really annoying me rn :(
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the unaffordability of one bedroom apartments in my area is something that can be so oppressive to me personally
#when i’m actively cooking something over a fire with earbuds in i’m not interested in having a five minute conversation with you.#when there’s visible food and grease all over the countertops that DOES in fact mean the kitchen should be cleaned soon yes even if we’ve#let it get worse than this before. if you want to send a text to the house group chat about pooling money to buy a new vacuum that’s great#and you can go ahead and do that without asking me while i’m busy exactly how you should phrase said text. if you use my knives you should#fucking PUT THEM BACK (three are now missing) and preferably without bits of food stuck on them though at this point i’m not even picky.#there are youtube videos about how to wash your dishes if you really can’t figure it out yourself it’s not the kind of thing you need to ask#your female housemate how to do. just. jesus CHRIST#my food is burned and i’m in a cranky mood and i can’t fucking take this anymore#my standards of cleanliness are clearly different from everyone else’s in this house which is just not a great situation to be in#god. anyway i’ve been feeling guilty because i’m finally starting to learn how to play the guitar so i’m going to be making a fair amount#of unpleasant noise in the house this year probably but tbh they can all just learn to live with it.#i am no longer feeling particularly interested in being considerate#caseyposting
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Since you enjoyed my last “Unhinged Adam” blurb, have some more:
Adam: *mutilating Zarkon’s corpse with his bare hands until it starts to turn into paste*
Allura: A-A-Adam, he’s dead. Very, very dead, you made sure of that, so think that’s enough of—
Adam: YOU WANT WHAT HE’S HAVING!?!?!?!?
Allura: …no
Adam: That’s what I thought. *goes back to absolutely eviscerating Zarkon’s corpse*
Shiro, thinking: Well, mark me down as scared AND horny.
AHSGSHDGSJAVHAJDGEIQFAHDGSJ
#LMAOOOOOOOOOO#the galra see adam coming and they just BOOK it in the other directiob#voltron? we can handle them. this human guy who is carrying more knives in his puny human hands than should be physically possible???#nahhhhh fam no way no how#et cetera#this is really funny especially To Me because of what i have planned for adam specifically teehee#but y'all wont get context until arc 2 hehe#ANYWAY I LOVE THESE SO MUCH. i support adam's rights and i also wholeheartedly support adam's wrongs. let him kill a man.#xpegasusuniverse#quintenary stars series
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because like. using carbon fiber was such an obviously bad idea. like its fucking fiber. its strands of carbon woven into a fabric. a common method of making it is to just burn rayon. insanely high tensile strength, literally zero compressive strength. all the stiffness of a carbon fiber material comes from whatever its in a composite with which usually means polymer resins. that submarine was relying on a cylinder of plastic with a bunch of shit mixed in to stand up to the pressure ¾ of a mile underwater. the actual carbon was contributing nothing. Billionaire Playboy Hamfisted McMetaphor and his plastic toy submersible was basically asking to die. its like he thought these proven engineering principles and safety regulations were nothing more than some sort of arbitrary etiquette. nobody builds deep sea pressure vessels out of carbon fiber because its the engineering equivalent of putting your elbows on the table. you gotta put a black box in your submarine because its rude not to. well hes not afraid to be impolite. what possible problem could there be, its carbon fiber, its so strong. and it looks cool. obviously hell be fine, hes a billionaire, someone took care of that for him. and people who think like that run the world. the entire global economy is a carbon fiber submarine, and I, for one, will relish watching the billionaires get crushed as the world implodes on all of us. look around you and tell me they dont deserve it.
#ive fucking had it. yes billionaires should die.#eat the rich as in like with forks and knives. cook bill gates over a fire and feed him to the dogs.#the amount of unnecessary human suffering caused by one person even having this much wealth let alone accruing it is immesurable.#a billion dollars is what you would make working for the us minimum wage for sixteen THOUSAND YEARS with no breaks even for sleep.#the degree of exploitation you have to commit to get that kind of money is beyond the scope of what the human mind can comprehend.#and then theres the people they straight up kill to stay wealthy. as one example: climate change#climate change is caused by oil companies. fossil fuels are the worlds main source of power because it helps the oil companies' bottom line#to act like the people who own these companies arent kissinger-level mass murderers is to pretend climate change has caused no deaths ever#so fucking forgive me if i laugh when they die. i have no qualms saying they absolutely deserve it#''but billionaires are people too!!!1'' yeah so what. hitler was a person. desantis is a person.#sometimes theres a person the world would be better off without#plus. 250k per ticket and they couldnt afford a real xbox controller. lol
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Stoic
When Gojo assumes Nanami Kento's lack of PDA for the reader shows a lack of desire for her, a tipsy Kento is quick to correct him.
Warnings: 18+ drabble, Kento goes on a smutty rant
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'A quick drink' after work had soon turned into two, three, four. Shoko took full advantage of the rooftop bar's balcony, smoking and idly chatting; Higuruma and Atsuya gossipped and quipped, snorting into their drinks; Satoru observed Kento and you keenly behind his dark lens; you stood, excusing yourself to the bathroom as Kento gave you a gentle smile.
"I'm sorry," Satoru interrupted loudly when you were gone, his pot boiling over, "I just-- I just don't get it, Nanami." All eyes were on Satoru and Kento now-- Kento, with one thin eyebrow raised in quiet disdain at Satoru, and Satoru, with his elbows planted forward on his knees in challenge.
A few moments of silence. Kento huffed, "Should I be apologising for someth--"
"--you've been together for years," Satoru interrupted, "and I'm just not convinced. She could be-- she could be a coat rack for all the affection you show her, you're supposed to not be able to keep your hands off her--"
"--you want me to grope my fiancée in public, am I correct--"
"--well maybe, anything to show that you love her--"
Kento laughed out loud, deep and humourless, continuing to chuckle into his glass, scoffing to himself; "Love her," he rumbled, swirling his whiskey, amber eyes flickering and carnal in the firelight.
Shoko had turned, smirking, to watch the scene. Atsuya leaned back, scowling, chewing on a toothpick with crossed arms. Hiromi leaned, glimmer-eyed, into the drama, one hand cupping his jaw and the other clasping his wineglass. He picked up the bottle, slowly beginning to pour another glass.
"I don't love her," Kento spat, downing his glass of whiskey in one smooth swallow, hissing and slamming the glass down on the table, "I worship her. I'm obsessed with her."
Satoru was silent, mulish, as Kento continued.
"I would walk through rains of bullets for her," he mused aloud, "I would cut off fingers with blunt knives--"
"Nanami, alright, I'm sorry--"
"Any second I'm not with her," Kento continued, his voice quieter, darker, the group leaning into him, "is a second wasted. I don't know what point there was in the years I spent without her-- probably just there to build me into even a semblance of the man she deserves--"
"--why are we doing this--"
"-- and when I'm not thinking about talking to her, watching her, being near her, holding her, or-- fuck, just having her look at me goes bone-deep...I spend at least eighty-percent of my time thinking about different ways to make her cum--"
Satoru was blushing now, his face in his hands, while the others leaned into Kento's mild breakdown with awe, "--fucking hell Nanami, I didn't mean--"
"I almost died last week, at work," Kento mused, as a laughing Hiromi slid the glass of wine down the table to Kento, which he caught seamlessly, "because I was too busy thinking about how her mouth had felt around my cock the night before, because I was pondering the many applications for my tie, because I was thinking about how incredible she felt underneath me--"
Atsuya and Shoko whispered together, Hiromi now giggling to himself unashamedly; "Oh he's really going for it--" "I know I know, shhh, let him finish--"
"--and I've been sat here with her all evening, resisting the urge to strip her, tie her wrists together and have her ride me until I go fucking blind, all because of social-fucking-propriety, just for some long streak of jizz like you to say I clearly don't love her--"
Satoru had shrunk in on himself now, his soul quietly leaving his body, mortified and put to rights as Kento tsked, swirling his wine before downing that, too. He accepted the bottle Hiromi slid towards him in approval.
"...it really just is rather rude and presumptuous of you, isn't it, Gojo?"
The group sat in stunned silence as you returned, sitting beside Kento and laying a hand on his crossed knees. You felt the bizarre tension; Hiromi unable to conceal a blush as he looked at you, Shoko giving you a knowing smile around her cigarette, Atsuya unable to make eye contact. You smiled uncertainly.
"...what did I miss?"
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Still waters run deep 💀💀💀
#jjk#jjk nanami#kento nanami#kento nanami x you#nanami fluff#higuruma hiromi#kento nanami x reader#nanami kento smut#kento nanami x y/n#jujustu kaisen#nanami headcanons#jujutsu kaisen nanami#jujutsu nanami#kento nanami smut#nanami kento#nanami kento fluff#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento x you#nanami smut#nanami x reader#nanami x y/n#nanami x you#gojo satoru#kusakabe atsuya#shoko ieiri
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SLYTHERINSLUT0’S KINKTOBER
october 25th. tom — anal sex / sexual punishment.
KINKTOBER MASTERLIST. | 2024.
summary: basically how i see a tom riddle punishment playing out. biblical tom of sorts. so self assured its impossible to piss him off so you go to lengths some may consider extreme but…eh. he knows you’re his.
warnings: 18+, SMUT MDNI, UNI hogwarts (obvs but just a reminder) reader and tom have an…interesting dynamic, toxic but also not toxic because it works for them, anal sex (obvs), sexual punishment, brief fingering, copious amounts of dirty talk, i once again utilize my favourite place in the school (the library).
"Tom—"
With a hand raised, he cuts you off. "Don't."
You blink. Swallow. Blink again. He's mad—oh, yes, he's mad—more than you've ever seen him and you once watched Abraxas Malfoy knock over his potion during a heavily-weighted exam.
That, in currency to this, is pennies.
You breathe in, try again. "Look, I can explain—"
He doesn't let you. Within a second his wand is out and with a flick of his wrist the room shifts to static—the glimmer from the silencing charm he just cast settles over your corner of the library, and you feel your fingers go numb—
"Why'd you stop?" He cocks his head, brow raised. His jaw is tight, the tension there burning into the space between you. His fingers flex. You can feel how much he's holding back. "If there's an explanation, by all means. I'd love to hear it."
Right—yeah, an explanation. That should help. Certainly, the man staring at you like he has bullets for eyes and knives for fingers will understand—he'll be completely calm once you explain to him you kissed someone else in retribution—because you wanted to get back at him.
"Well, I—" you push up from the desk, desperate to feel bigger, to level with him somehow. Tom thrives in this—having the upper hand, knowing all he has to do is stare at you, all stillness and quiet fury. He knows you hate it, that you'll spiral under it until you break and present him your neck on a silver platter. Until you hand him the knife and beg him to cut. "We had that argument, and I thought—I thought, maybe—you didn't—"
He moves closer. The air thickens. You're too focused on the fire in his eyes to acknowledge the sound of his wand clattering onto the desk—
"You thought?" His voice is something almost bored, like this is a trivial exercise for him—you can barely hear him over the roar of your pulse in your throat.
"—that you didn't want me anymore!"
You force the words out in a desperate rush, and the silence that follows feels like a goddamn canyon—you're just staring at each other, scowling in the wake of what you just said because you both know how utterly foolish it sounds. The only person Tom Riddle has and will ever allow himself to be vulnerable in front of—and you thought he'd leave after a silly argument.
No. You never thought that for a second.
And so, you try to save yourself. "Tom—I-I'm sorry, okay? I'm so sorry, I know I fucked up—but, it's not just me—I mean, you could have communicated better—"
He takes another step toward you, nodding along as if he's humoring you. "Right."
You step back—you don't mean to but the depleted space between you feels dangerous and your body reacts before you can stop it.
"Maybe—maybe we can learn from this? Right? A lesson for—for us both?" You keep talking. You don't know why, but you do. "And, maybe you could, uh, learn to talk about your feelings better?"
You wince as his eyebrows shoot up, mocking you without saying a word. Tom Riddle, talking about his fucking feelings? Right.
"I mean—you're just—" you hesitate because you know you're digging your own grave, yet he's still staring, daring you to finish. "—you're just so hard to read, you know?"
Another bored nod, another step closer. "Of course."
You swallow, stumbling back—of course Tom knows he's hard to read, that's the point. Every word out of your mouth is a wasted effort, a desperate attempt to reason with someone who's beyond it. Your ass collides with the desk behind you, boxing you in—and suddenly, he's there, right in front of you, all of his typical Tom intensity pouring into the limited space between you.
His breath brushes against your cheek, close enough that his lips could meet yours. But you know they won't. He'd never make it that easy. You can't tell if it's fear or something more wicked that twists in your chest. Dread, excitement—God, maybe both—
"You tried to provoke me."
Your throat tightens around a swallow. He isn’t asking.
"Maybe."
He doesn't blink. "You tried to see if I'd care."
You open your mouth, only to close it just as quickly. What can you say that he doesn't already know? You're as transparent as glass to him, and even that is a goddamn understatement. All you offer is a slow nod, unsure but weighted—he wasn't looking for an answer, he was looking for submission.
"And you thought, maybe, that I would come to you. That I would react. That l'd be angry." His fingers brush up your cheek, slipping into your hair with the kind of intimacy that feels out of place given the circumstances. And, inevitably, when the pull comes biting at your scalp, it's a burn you enjoy more than you should. "Were you hoping I'd punish you?"
"Well—I-"
"You know, don't you," he tugs your hair again to quiet you. Every question he's asking is rhetorical. "You know that trying to provoke me is dangerous."
You nod, fast. "I know."
"You know that I don't like to be provoked."
"I know, I know, I-"
"Shh." His lips brush over your neck, just once—a soft, fleeting thing that promises everything and nothing at once. You can't help the way you lean into him. "You're just making this worse for yourself. No more talking."
You choke on your stupid ego, but force a nod. You asked for this. You won't fight him on it. Not here. Not now.
"Good." He hums, and you feel your heart dance, stomach leap at the barest flicker of approval in his tone. His breath skates over your jaw, and you try not to shake. "You want to show me how sorry you are, don't you?"
You nod again.
"Good." He tugs at your bottom lip and something curls at the corners of his own that doesn't quite qualify as a smile. "Turn around."
With your heart on the floor beneath your feet, you nod for a final time before doing as he asked. You find that turning is a difficult task, though not due to resistance—your body just won't cooperate—a mess of weak knees and shallow breaths and tingling skin. You do it, though, with his hand on your hip, guiding you, directing you, pushing you over the desk until you're bent at the waist, positioned just how he wants.
It's merely a moment before you feel him pressed against your back, feel his belt buckle digging into your ass—
"What do you think I should do to you?" His breath grazes the nape of your neck and reflexively, you arch into him—his hands slide up your thighs, hips, finding your waist and the band of your skirt—he tugs at your zipper, you remain quiet. You know he doesn't want you to answer. "I'm sure you had your hopes. Your assumptions."
Tom Riddle, you've determined, is a torturous lover—a slow hand, a tease until you're in tears from the overstimulation. A sort of devotee to fulfilling your needs while simultaneously tempering his own. He's so very restrained, in everything he does—not fervent, not right away, anyway—
"Maybe you hoped I'd degrade you. Remind you of your place." He tugs down the zipper, letting the fabric fall to the ground at your feet—you shudder and pull your lips tight, willing yourself to stay silent as the cool air hits you. Tom's hand roams over one of your asscheeks, pawing lazily before tapping his palm against it. “Maybe you wanted me to make you feel it."
—he only rushes—he's only careless when he's angry.
And god, he's angry now.
"Maybe." You force the reply through the sting he left on your skin. It's past midnight—quiet is everything but you two, and you're almost certain he locked the door behind him on the way in. You let your head bow, eyes fixed on the wood under your palms. "Maybe I do."
"Of course you do. You've never been subtle." His foot nudges yours further apart, his fingers trailing up your thigh, finding the damp ache between your legs. Your breath catches but you hold still, biting your tongue as he teases—digits gliding through your slit, swirling your clit. "I know you thought about it."
"About what?" You try, though the question barely gets out before his other hand smacks the thick of your ass again, harder this time. "Shit—"
"About what I'd do to you." The hand on your clit shifts to smooth over the sting, rubbing slow, while the other works the buckle of his belt. "Tell me what you wanted."
"I—" you pause, steadying, gathering yourself. You know you have to give him something, but it's hard to think when he's like this. "I—I wanted you to be...careless."
"Careless." He says it like he's savouring it, rolling it over his tongue like candy. It's not a word that suits him; you're not convinced he even knows how. "You want me to be rough—to be selfish. Like you were."
The moment his belt is loose you feel those slender fingers dip back into your slit, two of them pushing inside your cunt without warning, stretching you open as his trousers slip down his thighs— he grunts low, a sound that cuts into the quiet as his cock springs free and he presses it against you, unoccupied hand slipping back into your hair, pulling you up until you're flush with him.
"Yes." You're not sure who sounds more hollow for it—your voice for asking, his for granting it. "I want that. I deserve it. Please. Please—"
"Please. It's always please with you," he mocks, the words a hiss that burn your cheeks. "Yet, I don't get to be selfish like you, do I? I still have to show restraint."
"I mean—oh—fu—" you choke as his lips find your neck, muttering something against your skin before you feel the sudden cool slip of a lubing charm coating your asshole and cunt. "Tom-"
"Despite what you might believe, I've never had much in the way of patience," he breathes, a confession almost, something deeper—something that feels like it costs him. "Not when it comes to you."
"Tom—" you fucking gasp his name as he pulls his fingers from your cunt—only to drag them higher until they find your asshole. Despite his haste he's still at ease, massaging, pressing one finger against it until you let him in. He sinks slowly, curling slightly, and your thighs shake—lungs deflate. "Oh—oh, fuck, Tom—it's been—"
"A while, hasn't it?" He finishes, pressing a kiss just beneath your ear, his finger sliding all the way in. "So tight for me. So—tight—"
"Tom—" a repetition of the last one, his name spilling from you like it’s the only goddamn word you know how to say. "Please, Tom. Oh god—"
"Shhh." He shushes, but it's not to quiet you; you know that. He's savouring this. He slips in a second finger, stretching you wider, working you open, and you're biting your lip to keep from crying out. "This isn't about you."
"You—" your voice breaks on another gasp, hands clutching at the desk. "—you think this is punishment."
"Partially." His muses as his fingers scissor, filling you with the most delicious ache. You're so slick, arousal running down your thighs, and that—oh no, that does not escape his notice. "Look at you, dripping for me. And yet,"
"Oh god." The realization crashes over you—it’s punishment as in orgasm denial. "That's—that's not—"
"Not fair?" There's a smirk in his voice, and though he doesn't say it, you hear the word that lingers beneath it: pathetic, pathetic, pathetic. He pulls his fingers out and you whine, feeling empty for half a second before the head of his cock glides against your slit, gathering your juices before finding its way up to the throbbing ring of muscle. "Isn't this what you wanted? For me to be selfish?"
"I just—" words scatter, useless, because you're trembling, breathing hard, and then he's pressing in, slow enough to save you pain but fevered enough to make you feel him. "Oh—oh—"
"Oh fuck." He says it breathless, as if it's an agony to fit himself inside of you. "Oh yes."
And it is an agony—for both of you, though for very different reasons. Tom is huge, and even on a good day, it's a struggle to take him. He's so deep, filling you in ways you'd forgot were possible. You struggle to hold yourself upright—legs visibly shaking, teeth gritting. He sinks all the way in, and in your mind, you can almost see the look on his face, the way his lashes flutter, the way his head tips back—
"Ah—“ he groans, a rough sound that's followed by a huff and a slight roll of his hips, like he's holding back, like he can't bring himself to move just yet. He yanks you up against him by your hair. "That's fucking tight, isn't it? This must be hell for you."
He's not wrong, it is. But it's hellish for Tom too, the type of hell the two of you inflict on eachother that is as fucking addicting as it is anything else—
"Just—" you manage to bite out breathlessly, but it's a struggle to make the words. "Move—"
"Make me," he grits, jerking your head to the side until your foreheads press together. "Convince me to use you. Tell me how badly you want it. How much of a whore you are for it."
Merlin help you, you moan at his words. It's that thing inside you—the needy, desperate part that's dying at his feet. You don't know what it is or why it's there; it just is, and it's greedy. It's not something you'd give into normally—your ego is far too big to give him the satisfaction of begging, not aloud—never in words that he could use against you later—but in these moments, you both learn to make exceptions.
"Dear god, Tom—please, just use me-" you push your hips back against him, one of his hands slide up your stomach, cupping your tits. "Please, l'm—I'm a pathetic, begging whore for you. God, I know you're pissed—I feel it—just take it out on me—l want it—"
He moans—a soft, almost gentle sound—and you know you've struck a nerve, the part of him that's equally as weak in the moment—the part of him that makes it all too easy for things to spiral like this.
"Goddamn you." Something inside him snaps, something that's been frayed, just waiting for a pull—and you've pulled it now, and oh you want, no, you need him to make you pay for it, to make it hurt. "You just—you always-"
He grunts, cutting himself off and in a way, it's almost like he's thanking you because you're giving him an outlet, something to take it out on. You test each other, push and pull and let the other break, because, at the end of the day, it always comes down to this. The two of you. Like this.
A sharp inhale, and he starts to thrust.
"Fuck!" it's all you manage, it's all you can manage, because it—just like that—feels the way you wanted it to feel but it also feels so much more intense, so intense that your brain can't keep up. "Oh god—oh fuck-"
"Fucking hell," he spits, like you're the worst thing in his world and the best thing all at once, and somehow, that makes perfect sense. He lets go of your hair, and you slump forward onto the desk, elbows barely holding you up as his hand smacks your ass, fingers spreading you apart. "So—so tight—“
You're a shuddering mess, helpless to it; all you can do is remember to breathe through it.
"That's it." Another smack to your ass, thrusts quick and deep. "Fuck. The things you drive me to do."
You know him so well—and he knows you just as damn well, and that's the point, isn't it? That's what this is all about. You're the perfect mix of wrong, a match that burns too hot it hurts but the ache makes him feel alive.
"I want to cum—" your neglected clit is begging for it, you’re fucking begging for it. "Tom please—"
At that, he laughs and it's mean and it's condescending and you love—God—how you love it and want it and can't get enough of it. His hips snap forward a little bit rougher and you lose a bit more of your sanity—
"You think you deserve to come, after what you did?" Another smack to your ass.
You don't know how to answer, and he doesn't wait for one anyway. He knows exactly what he’s doing to you—everything is so calculated and calculated and calculated. You've never once seen him falter, and you don't expect to see it now. You don't know if you'd survive it if you did.
"No." He answers for you. "You don't."
His fingers trace around your thigh, grazing your mound and finding your needy clit, your sopping slit, gliding through it—you moan louder than you should as he gathers your slick on his fingers, humming at what he finds there before retreating—bringing them up to your mouth.
"Open."
You open your mouth and he feeds you your need—the result of his selfishness. You love him for what he is and you love him for what he isn’t too. How he tries to be both, only when you ask.
"Taste that?" It's a whisper, something he's telling you.
You sob around his fingers as he fucks your ass deep—he pulls them out to let you respond. You nod. "Yes."
"Taste how much you want this?"
"Yes." A pathetic moan. The perfect response.
"Good girl." He presses the words into your hair, the back of your neck, along your spine. He sucks in a breath as he fucks like he needs it just to speak. "You're going to remember this the next time you think about doing something just to spite me, I hope you know that."
Of course you will. He knows it, you know it—there's no doubt in your mind that you'll remember this the next time you toy with his patience; the next time you give him a reason to discipline you again. And what's worse is: you'll do it anyway.
It's a battle you two will fight for eternity.
But you don't get a chance to respond, not that you'd have one anyways—because his hand is on your throat and his lips are at your ear and he's sucking in air through his teeth and then—
"I'm going to cum." He whispers and you hear the pain in it. "Fuck."
You shiver in reply; a whine of a whimper coming from the back of your throat. “Tom—“
"Shh." He shushes you with his free hand, gripping your jaw as his thrusts turn sloppy, erratic. "Fucking take it.”
God—you’ll take it. Of course you will. You asked for this, drove him to this point. You're both sick, but this is the kind that doesn't have a cure.
One of his hands moves to his own hair, tugging at the back of his head; it's the only hint you've had this whole time of how much he's affected by this, how much it's driven him mad. He's doing his best to keep control, to maintain composure and make sure you feel it—but it's the way his hand squeezes your hip when he lets go of your throat that gives him away.
It gives in to what he's been repressing.
"Ohhh—fuck—yes—" and then you feel it, feel him, hot and sticky and warm, filling your ass and holding you there until he’s finished. His body collapses against the back of yours, hips slow rolling until he's drained—until you’ve taken all of him, all of his anger and frustration and restraint along with it. He’s sweaty, exhausted, spent—forehead pressed to your hair. "You feel that?"
"You know I do." You're not allowed to sound so smug, not while you're in the position you're in, but you are. It’s why he loves you. "That's what you were looking for."
"No, that's what you were looking for." He nips your ear, and you hear the smile in his voice when he bites down on it and murmurs a, "and that's why you're my favourite," into it.
"And you mine, Tommy."
#SLYTHERINSLUT0’S KINKTOBER👻#kinktober 2024#kinktober#harry potter#tom riddle#tom riddle smut#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle x y/n#tomriddlesmut#tomriddlexreader#tom riddle is daddy#tom riddle x you#tom riddle x yn#tom riddle x oc#tomriddle x you#tomriddle smut#tomriddle x reader#tom x reader#tom smut#tom#riddle#riddle smut#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys#slytherinboys#slytherinboys x reader#slytherin#tomriddle#tom marvolo riddle#riddle brothers
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