#they deserve such respect and care and it makes me sad I'll maybe never have the opportunity to do right by them

[fidelesir]

Guess who just learned she gets to sing in "One Day More" as COSETTE in the winter concert?????

Teen me and college me and every me is SHAKING. Cosette! Cosette freaking Fauchelevent! Darling girl!

If I'm destined to age out of all my beloved ingenues in a couple of years, at least I will have had this moment.

[mrsfancyferrari]

Fragments of Hope

Summary: You had an argument with Daniel and you decided to leave him for a while. What you didn't know is that he can't live without you.

Song: MILLION DOLLAR BABY - Tommy Richman

Author’s note: I can't write short stories to save my life. I hope you enjoy this long journey which may take a full day to read. Please like, reblog and share this! <3

Word count: 4.6k

"Daniel, I feel like you're prioritizing your racing career over our relationship. It seems like you don't care about me anymore." You said, stressing over the fact that Daniel didn't understand.

"I understand why you might feel that way, but racing is my passion and it's important to me. I want you to know that you're also a priority in my life." Daniel replied.

"Well it certainly does feel like it sometimes," You muttered, standing up from your seat.

"Y/N please listen to me," Daniel pleaded, standing up to follow you.

"No you listen to me!" you yelled, turning around to face him. "Everyday you stay in the paddock until 1AM or later when you come home and then you leave at 8AM to go back to work. Daniel, I have less than 7 hours to spend time with you and it's mostly used on you sleeping,"

"I understand that it may feel that way, but racing is not just a career for me. It's my passion," Daniel pleaded, his voice filled with sincerity. "I love you more than words can express, and I want to make it work between us."

"How Daniel, tell me how you are going to fix this because right now, I don't feel like I'm in a relationship with you but a friend who helps you."

Daniel stood there, his eyes filled with regret and realization. He had never seen you so upset before, and your words struck a chord deep within him. He knew that he had to make a change, to find a way to balance his racing career with your needs and desires.

"That's what I thought," You muttered, taking your phone before heading for the door, "Don't follow me,"

Feeling frustrated and hurt, you stormed out of the house and went to your best friend's house for the night.

As you're on your way to your friend's place, your phone dies, leaving you disconnected from Daniel. However, when you finally arrive at your friend's house, you decide to check your phone for any missed messages.

Opening your photos or messages, you notice several messages and calls from Daniel. One that read, "I'm sorry for what happened. Are you at your friend's house?"

You take a deep breath, feeling a mix of anger and sadness.

Despite your hurt feelings, you decide to text him back, "Yes, I'm at my friend's house. I need some time to think and process everything. Please respect my space for now."

It's late at night when you find yourself sitting with your friend, doing your skin care routine together. You decide to share your situation with her, expecting some reassurance.

As you pour your heart out to your friend, she listens attentively, her eyes filled with empathy. "I can understand why you're feeling hurt and frustrated," she says, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

"It's important to prioritize your own needs and emotions in a relationship. You deserve someone who can dedicate time and effort to nurturing your connection."

"But I have got to remind you how in love Daniel looks when he's with you," your friend said, her voice filled with sincerity.

"I've seen the way his eyes light up when he talks about you, and the way he always puts your happiness first. Maybe this situation is a wake-up call for him to prioritize your relationship and find a better balance. Give him a chance to make things right, but also remember to listen to your own needs and make decisions that are best for you."

You nod, appreciating your friend's perspective and words of encouragement. "You're right," you reply, "I do see how much Daniel cares about me. I'll take some time to reflect on what I need and have an open conversation with him."

The next day, you and Daniel barely exchange any words. It feels like there's a tension between the two of you, but you try to ignore it.

As the race day approaches, you find yourself watching Daniel's race. Unfortunately, he doesn't perform well, finishing in 19th place. The disappointment weighs heavily on both of you and knew that Daniel would be very disappointed in himself, but you decide to give it some time.

You were always the one to comfort him after a bad race, reminding him that everyone has off days and that his performance does not define his worth as an athlete. You would assure him that you still believed in him and that you're proud of the effort he put in.

Feeling conflicted, you decide to reach out to Daniel after his disappointing race. Despite being in your friend's house, you understand that he is most likely in the paddock as usual.

You send him a text expressing your support and reminding him that you believe in his abilities, hoping that it will provide some comfort during this challenging time. . . .

Days turn into weeks, and the tension between you and Daniel remains. One night, you receive a strange picture from Lando, a close friend of Daniel's and you.

In the photo, you see Daniel, his usually composed and determined demeanor replaced with disheveled hair and glassy eyes. His grip on the lamppost is tight, as if it's the only thing keeping him upright.

The streetlights cast an eerie glow on his face, highlighting the exhaustion and despair etched in his features. It's a stark contrast to the vibrant and confident person you've known him to be.

As you study the image, a wave of concern washes over you. You can't help but wonder what has led Daniel to this point.

Is it the mounting pressure of his racing career? The strain on your relationship? Or something deeper that you're unaware of?

Unable to bear the weight of uncertainty any longer, you decide to video call Lando, hoping to gain some insight into what has been happening with Daniel lately.

"Lando, what's going on?" you asked worriedly, your voice filled with concern as you hoped to gain some insight into what has been happening with Daniel lately.

"Oh yeah hey Y/N, your boyfriend is really drunk and he is hugging a lamppost with all of his strength," Lando explained, showing his face and waving at the camera.

"I've been trying to get him to come back to the house, but he's been pretty stubborn. I think he's been struggling with the disappointment from the race and it's just gotten to him."

"Let me see him,"

As Lando shifted the camera towards Daniel, you could see the toll that his recent struggles had taken on him. His usually vibrant eyes were bloodshot and glazed over, filled with a mixture of exhaustion and anguish.

His disheveled hair clung to his sweaty forehead, and his once confident posture had slouched, as if weighted down by the burden he carried.

It was clear that he was in a state of deep distress, and your heart ached at the sight of him clinging to the lamppost, seeking solace in his own thoughts.

"Daniel baby," you said in a gentle tone that you would only use for him. Daniel perked up, looking around for you, his eyes scanning the surroundings until they finally met yours on the video call.

There was a glimmer of recognition and relief in his eyes as he realized you were there, offering him a lifeline of support and understanding amidst his turmoil.

With a shaky voice, Daniel whispered, "Y/N, is that you?" His words carried a mix of vulnerability and hope, as if he was desperate for your presence to validate his struggles and offer him the comfort he desperately needed.

Your heart racing, you didn't waste a second. Without another thought, you hung up the video call and rushed out the door, fueled by a determination to be by Daniel's side.

As you sprinted towards where Lando had described, the worry and fear in your chest propelled you forward, your mind filled with a single thought - you needed to reach Daniel, to hold him, and to let him know that he wasn't alone in his pain.

"Lando, make sure that he stays there and share your location," you instructed, knowing that finding Daniel quickly was of utmost importance.

The urgency in your voice reflected the depth of your concern as you relied on Lando to keep an eye on him until you arrived.

"It's not like he's letting go of this lamppost any time soon," Lando joked

You couldn't help but chuckle at Lando's attempt to lighten the mood. "Well, I'll make sure to give him a little nudge if he's still holding on when I get there," you replied, grateful for the small moment of levity amidst the seriousness of the situation.

Lando chuckled and said, "Just make sure it's a gentle nudge. We don't want him falling over before you get there. I'll keep an eye on him for you, Y/N. He's in good hands."

"Also just make sure you bring some extra strength with you. I have a feeling Daniel might need it," he said, his voice laced with concern.

"I'll be there as soon as I can, Lando," you assured him, your voice filled with determination. "Thank you for watching over him. I know he's in good hands with you."

When you finally locate Daniel, you approach him cautiously. He looks disheveled and confused, unaware of the picture you received from Lando.

As soon as you got off the car and walked over to the two of them, Daniel's eyes were on you. His gaze held a mixture of relief, anticipation, and a glimmer of hope, as if he had been waiting for you to arrive and bring him the solace he desperately needed.

"Thank goodness you're here Y/N," Lando said smiling at you before giving you a hug.

"How is he?" You whispered to Lando, glancing at Daniel whose eyes were still trained on you.

"He's in bad shape," Lando whispered, his worry evident in his voice. "He's refusing to drink water, he's been vomiting, and he has a high fever. But no matter what, he won't let go of that lamppost."

Your heart sank as you took in the state Daniel was in. The sight of him clinging to the lamppost, refusing to let go despite his deteriorating health, only heightened your concern.

"I'll go try and talk to him."

"Good luck but you probably won't need it," Lando replied.

As you approached Daniel, you couldn't help but notice the hollowed look in his eyes, as if the light within him had faded. His once vibrant and charismatic demeanor was replaced by a sense of weariness and defeat.

His disheveled hair and trembling hands were clear signs of the toll this ordeal had taken on him, and it was heartbreaking to see him in such a vulnerable state.

The sight of him clinging desperately to the lamppost, his knuckles white with tension, revealed a level of desperation that struck a chord within you.

Nevertheless, you mustered up all the courage you had and gently reached out to touch his shoulder, hoping to break through the walls he had built around himself.

"Daniel, it's me Y/N, your girlfriend," you said slowly, your voice filled with love and concern.

His eyes flickered for a moment, as if trying to grasp onto a distant memory, before a glimmer of recognition appeared. "Y/N," he whispered hoarsely, his grip on the lamppost loosening slightly.

"I'm here, Daniel," you replied softly, your heart breaking at the sight of his vulnerability. "I won't leave you alone. We'll get through this together."

You placed your palm against Daniel's forehead, feeling the heat radiating from his feverish skin. Concern washed over you as you realized just how sick he was. "We need to get you to a doctor, Daniel," you said, your voice tinged with urgency.

"No doctor," he slurred, his words barely audible. "I don't want their help. Just stay with me, Y/N."

As Daniel's words trailed off, tears welled up in his eyes and cascaded down his cheeks. Each tear carried the weight of his pain and the fear of losing himself and you.

You held him tightly, offering a comforting embrace as his tears soaked into your shoulder, a silent testament to the depth of his despair.

"Daniel," you said gently, wiping away his tears with your thumb, "I understand that you're scared and don't want anyone's help. But I can't stand to see you suffer like this. The doctors can help you get better. They have the knowledge and resources to treat you. Please, let me take you to the hospital. I'll be right by your side the whole time, I promise."

Daniel looked at you with a mix of desperation and gratitude, his trembling hand reaching out to hold yours tightly. "Okay," he whispered, his voice filled with surrender, "take me to the hospital."

You nodded, grateful for Lando's support. Slowly and carefully, with Lando's help, you guided Daniel to Lando's car. As you settled into the back seats, Daniel's trembling hand still tightly holding yours, Lando started the engine and drove off towards the hospital, the weight of the situation heavy in the air.

Daniel leaned against you, his body weak and trembling. Each breath he took seemed to require immense effort, his chest rising and falling in shallow gasps.

The gravity of the situation weighed heavily on your heart as you held him close, praying for his strength to endure just a little longer until you reached the hospital.

"I'm so sorry Y/N," he whispered while taking in sharp breaths, his voice strained with pain.

"What do you mean baby?" you whispered, observing every movement Daniel made.

"I'm sorry.... for.... for not being.... good enough," Daniel stuttered, tears streaming down his face.

Your heart shattered at his words, and you squeezed his hand tighter, your voice filled with love and conviction. "Daniel, please don't say that. You are more than enough, and I love you just the way you are. We'll get through this together, I promise."

"I... love you," Daniel muttered. "Please don't leave... me."

"I love you too, Daniel," you replied, tears welling in your eyes. "I will never leave your side. We're in this together, and we will fight through it. You are not alone."

The rest of the journey was mostly silent, as you focused on keeping Daniel awake and alert, gently talking to him and urging him to stay awake. However, Daniel's exhaustion and pain were overwhelming, and he longed for the comfort of sleep.

Despite his struggle, he fought to stay awake, knowing that reaching the hospital was crucial for his survival.

As you pulled up to the hospital, Lando's prearranged call had ensured that a medical team was waiting at the entrance with a stretcher for Daniel. They quickly and efficiently transferred him onto the stretcher, their urgency matching the gravity of the situation.

You watched with a mix of relief and anxiety as they whisked Daniel away, knowing that he was now in the hands of the medical professionals who could provide him with the immediate care he needed.

You and Lando waited in the waiting room, your legs bouncing against the floor in a nervous rhythm. The minutes felt like hours as you anxiously scanned the hallway for any sign of the medical team returning with updates on Daniel's condition. The weight of uncertainty hung heavy in the air, and all you could do was hope and pray for positive news.

"I couldn't help but listen in your conversation in the car," Lando started. "Did something happen before today?"

You took a deep breath, your voice trembling slightly as you replied, "Yes, Daniel and I have been going through a difficult time lately."

"Excuse me, were you the ones who brought Mr. Ricciardo?" the doctor asked, looking at you and Lando. Your heart raced as you nodded, eager for any updates on Daniel's condition.

"Yes, we brought him," you replied anxiously. "How is he? Is he going to be okay?" The doctor's face softened as they looked at you both with empathy. "We're doing everything we can for Mr. Ricciardo. He's stable for now, but we need to run some tests and monitor him closely. It's too early to say anything definitive, but we're hopeful."

"Can we at least see him?" Lando asked on your behalf, his voice filled with concern. The doctor nodded sympathetically, understanding your need to be by Daniel's side during this critical time.

"Yes, you can see him, but please keep in mind that he needs rest and quiet. Follow me."

As you followed the doctor down the hallway, a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts raced through your mind. Fear, hope, and a desperate longing to see Daniel battled within you, creating a tumultuous storm of anticipation.

You clung to the doctor's words of hope, praying that they would ring true and that Daniel would pull through this ordeal.

As you entered Daniel's hospital room, you were taken aback by his appearance. His usually vibrant and energetic demeanor had been replaced by a pale and weakened figure lying motionless on the bed.

The sight of him hooked up to machines and monitors sent a pang of sadness and worry through your heart. Tubes and wires were connected to his body, a stark reminder of the severity of his condition.

Despite the sterile and clinical environment, the room was filled with an overwhelming sense of vulnerability and fragility.

The beeping of the machines provided a haunting soundtrack to the room, punctuating the silence that hung heavily in the air. Daniel's closed eyes gave no indication of his awareness of your presence, and you couldn't help but feel a profound sense of helplessness.

"I'll leave you to it." The doctor muttered, closing the door and leaving you and Lando in the room.

The atmosphere in the room was heavy with a mix of sorrow and uncertainty. As you stood there, surrounded by the beeping machines and the stillness of Daniel's presence, the weight of the situation sank deep into your being.

It was a somber reminder of the fragility of life and the powerlessness you felt in the face of it all.

You sat down beside Daniel, gently taking his hand in yours. The touch of his cold skin sent a shiver down your spine, a stark contrast to the warmth and vitality he once exuded. As you sat there, you couldn't help but silently will him to fight, to overcome whatever obstacles lay ahead.

"This is all my fault," you muttered, silently crying onto Daniel's hand, overwhelmed by guilt and regret. You couldn't help but blame yourself for the situation, questioning every decision and action that led to this moment.

The weight of guilt and regret pressed heavily upon you as you sat beside Daniel, crying silently onto his hand. Every decision and action leading up to this moment played on a loop in your mind, tormenting you with thoughts of self-blame and what-ifs.

The emotions were overwhelming, and you couldn't help but wonder if you could have done something differently to prevent this.

"It's not your fault," Daniel strained, his voice weak but filled with reassurance. You quickly looked up, astonishment and relief flooding your eyes as you saw him awake.

"I'll leave it up to you guys," Lando said as he left the room and left you both having no chance to hear him as he left.

"Does it hurt?" you muttered.

"No but it hurts that you're crying," Daniel muttered, slowly raising his hand to wipe your tears, "It's not your fault,"

"I shouldn't have left like that, I distracted you before your race and now this," you said, your voice filled with remorse and self-blame. Daniel's weak smile broke through the heaviness in the room as he gently squeezed your hand.

"Don't blame yourself," he whispered, his words carrying a sense of forgiveness and understanding.

"I shouldn't have treated you like that for you to leave the house," Daniel stated, his voice filled with sincerity. "I promise to focus more on our relationship and prioritize our happiness above all else."

"You don't have to," you muttered.

"But I will, I promise."

"You know," Daniel began, his voice growing stronger, "I've had a lot of time to think while I was lying here. And I realized that life is too short for us to hold onto regrets and blame ourselves for things that are out of our control. We can't change the past, but we can choose how we move forward from here."

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were tears of gratitude and hope. "You're right," you whispered, your voice filled with a mix of relief and determination.

"Can you get in here with me? I miss having you beside me when I sleep," Daniel muttered, his voice filled with longing and vulnerability.

You hesitated for a moment, unsure if it was appropriate, but ultimately decided to climb into the hospital bed and snuggle up beside him, finding comfort in the warmth of his embrace.

"Are you comfortable?" you whispered, laying against Daniel's chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

"More than ever," he replied, wrapping his arms around you tightly, as if never wanting to let go.

As you kept quiet, tracing Daniel's tattoos slowly, you marveled at the stories they told, each inked line representing a moment in his life. It was a silent act of love and connection, a way for you to understand him on a deeper level without words.

This was how most of your nights would end, with you tracing over Daniel's tattoos while he tenderly kissed the top of your head and rubbed your back. It was a comforting routine that brought you both a sense of peace and intimacy, allowing you to express your love for each other without the need for words.

In those quiet moments, you felt a deep connection and understood that the stories etched on his skin were a part of him, just as you were a part of each other's lives.

"Will you come to live with me again?" Daniel muttered against the top of your head, his words filled with a mix of vulnerability and hope. You looked up at him, your eyes meeting his, and felt a surge of love and longing.

"Daniel," you whispered, your voice filled with uncertainty. As you looked into his eyes, you could see the sincerity and desperation in his gaze.

A part of you wanted to believe him, to give him one more chance, but another part of you was hesitant, unsure if things could truly be different this time.

Daniel begged desperately, "Please, give me one chance and I promise that I will be more committed to our relationship if given the chance."

Taking a deep breath, you let the love you still felt for Daniel override your doubts. "Yes," you whispered, a mix of hope and caution in your voice. "I'll give us one more chance, but we have to take it slow and work on rebuilding trust."

Daniel grinned, "That's all I need," he said, his eyes filled with gratitude and determination. "I promise you won't regret this. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right between us."

Your heart fluttered as Daniel's hand tightened around your waist, pulling you closer to him. Goosebumps erupted across your skin with every touch, igniting a fire within you that only he could ignite. The electricity between you is palpable, and you can't help but melt into his embrace.

As your lips met, a wave of familiarity and passion washed over you. The taste of his kiss was like coming home, a sweet and addictive blend of warmth and tenderness. In that moment, all doubts and uncertainties melted away, replaced by a renewed sense of hope and desire.

The world around you faded into the background as you lost yourself in the intoxicating dance of his lips against yours, each kiss deepening the connection between your souls.

Time stood still as you surrendered to the magnetic pull of his embrace, savoring every stolen breath and gentle caress. It was a kiss that spoke volumes, a silent promise of a love that had weathered storms and emerged stronger than ever.

You gently tug at his collar, out of breath, and as Daniel asks, "Do you want me to stop?"

Also out of breath, and with a mischievous smile, you whisper, "Just the opposite, please. Don't stop."

Your words are filled with a mix of vulnerability and desire, a silent plea for him to continue. With a knowing smile, Daniel leans in closer, his touch becoming even more electrifying, as the intensity between you grows with each passing moment.

"God, I missed this," Daniel muttered against your lips, his voice filled with longing and a tinge of regret. The weight of his words hung in the air, reminding you of the time lost and the journey ahead.

But in that moment, all that mattered was the fire that burned between you, igniting a passion that refused to be extinguished. . . .

[arainywriter]

this is going to probably be the longest post of my life, and i HATE getting into fandom discourse which is why i don't usually write anything about fandom discourse, but i just want to address some things about our favorite rat grinders so if you want to read, click below

as someone who loves the rat grinders as nuanced antagonists who are also teenagers, i think the rat grinders before they ever joined in on porter and jace's plan were assholes.

i think they were the quiet bullies, the mean people who you never notice until they are mean to you, the ones who seem nice and respectable up close, but talk shit about you the minute you're gone.

i think most of them (kipperlilly in particular) were looking for a reason to be bad. and i know we might not ever get this confirmation, but based off kipperlilly's file and other moments with the trg, i think it's possible this is correct.

they were assholes who needed a reason to be even bigger, more dangerous assholes and most of them took it. and yes, it was either that or be dead, but i want you to know that sometimes that's not even a question. sometimes you don't even care about the other option, you just want to rage.

i think the one time all of them or maybe some of them even thought that what they were doing could be was when lucy died. and that's when i feel bad for them. they had to lock in right there because they all had made a decision, and they all needed to continue it. that's the manipulation.

i know they are kids. they are just teenagers. i work with teens, and guys, let me tell you, some teenagers are assholes. and i don't mean say a funny mean joke asshole, i mean literally going to grow up and be a shitty person asshole. i think some of the rat grinders were those kind of teens.

did they deserve to be redeemed? i think some of them do. i think buddy has a big shot at being redeemed, and i genuinely hated that he died in the last stand and had to make that decision. i think ally is going to try if they can. i think mary ann might be redeemed.

but also, you guys have to remember that this is dnd. i don't think many of you have played dnd before, or if you have you're just really conscientious about everything you do. because as a dm who has played dnd and has made nuanced antagonists, your players are gonna straight up kill them.

brennan knows that. i'm 100% sure he knows that. this isn't scripted. the intrepid heroes aren't thinking about what the fans want every time they play. in dnd, ESPECIALLY in brennan's dnd, it's kill or be killed.

the rat grinder's weren't going to use non-lethal attacks. they were going to kill the bad kids, and they were going to be UNNATURALLY happy throughout it all. they were going to spit in their faces and roast marshmallows on their bodies. they were going to not feel guilty.

sound familiar?

i think the bad kids have been nice to the rat grinders since day one. not kind, nice. they've been polite and nice to them, not going all in until this fight. if this fight happened before the finale, i think the rat grinders would have had more time to be redeemed (ex. see Ragh in season 1 who def would have died in the finale battle if the bad kids hadn't fought him earlier). but the bad kids are stressed and done.

there is no time to be polite and nice when the world is going to end.

i know you liked these characters. i did too. i'm sad to see them go, but even when someone is nuanced and could be redeemed, the person they were a piece of shit to doesn't have to be the one to redeem them. they don't have to be the one to keep them alive and make sure they only get taken the police instead of dead. cause trg would have gone to jail.

aelwyn did. so would they.

people you've wronged don't owe you forgiveness or redemption. trg didn't wrong tbk that bad, but they made them angry, they tried to kill them, and they're probably almost close to ending the world.

i'll miss you rat grinders. you guys were perfect narrative foils, but it was always going to end like this.

now stop being absolute assholes to the intrepid heroes just cause they didn't play how you wanted.

love this fandom, and yeah, d20 get shit wrong sometimes. always make sure to critique your favorite piece of media.

but at the end of the day, this isn't your table to play dnd at. this is theirs and they are having fun. why don't you go and play as the rat grinders in your home game and give them the ending they deserve, or make fanfiction about it?

put your anger into that.

[subterlyfitumtale]

Cover of the song "Bonetrousle by the Man of the Internet," for Subtertale and sung by subtertale Papyrus, subtertale sans, and subtertale stelliny:

[PAPYRUS]

Hey you two...it's time for my big number, Sans and Stelliny! Press play!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Okay.

(Sans hits a tree and Stelliny laughs)

[PAPYRUS]

Sans and Stelliny! I meant play the music!

[[SANS and STELLINY]

Ok.

(Sans plays trombone and Stelliny plays trumpet)

[PAPYRUS]

SANS....STELLINY!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Okay, let's stop now and see...Oh, here's the play button!

[PAPYRUS]

Are you guys ready for this!?

[SANS and STELLINY]

We think no one could be ready for this.

[PAPYRUS]

Shut up guys! You just don't understand what perfection is!

Prepare yourself now, human!

You face Papyrus now!

Even though the royal guards couldn't stop you, I'll do it alone!

So I hope you're ready for the ultimate showdown.

While you're trying to show your strength and determination in this bone battle.

I see your face, you're running around everywhere.

This is serious, I know that look!

Are you flirting with me?

Please understand

That I'm a highly sought after skeleton

And I'm also a skeleton with standards, mostly for making spaghetti and pasta!

Don't feel sad, human even though I will capture you

[SANS and STELLINY]

Because you can do anything.

[PAPYRUS]

I just have to do my best to capture her!

Undyne will see that I can be a real royal guard!

[SANS and STELLINY]

That's right, there's only that one girl you need...

[PAPYRUS]

I hate to say goodbye!

Maybe someday, all of us can become friends

And when that day comes

I know we'll have a lot of fun!

But until then

I have to capture you

Since you're a human

[SANS and STELLINY]

But what you're trying to do is become her friend.

[PAPYRUS]

Both of you! Stop messing up my number with incidental letters!

[SANS and STELLINY]

We thought what we said sounded pretty good.

[PAPYRUS]

Well, I thought that didn't sound like something I would say.

And that's the worst thing you ever said!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Oh, then forgive us.

[PAPYRUS]

Okay, guys. I forgive you now. Let's go! Let's enjoy Grillby's!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Hey, Paps...

The girl is still here. And the music is still playing. We're pretty sure that means the song didn't end.

[PAPYRUS]

Oopsie doopsie! I completely forgot about that! HUMAN! Get ready for my second attack verse!

You can do anything

If you want it hard enough and determined enough

Undyne says that, and she's very strong and determined!

So I look up to and copy her style!

And that's why I'll be the best and most awesome future royal guard

Or at least one who's in training to be one

Though it's taking a while...

But when that's over, we can be friends

And you'll see how a royal guard has immense amounts of fun!

Where are you going, human?

We're supposed to be fighting!

Why do you think this song ended?

Oh, I knew it, guys.

Not even the human respects me.

[SANS and STELLINY]

Listen bro, that's not true. A lot of people like you.

[PAPYRUS]

How do they know?

[SANS and STELLINY]

The underground network has, like, a million versions of this song. Here's one now. Press play, boys!

[PAPYRUS]

Guys, this is—

[SANS and STELLINY]

Yep. Blow 'em away, bro! Show that you're bad ass and a backbone breaker!

[PAPYRUS]

Come on then, human, let's see if you can keep up

With the greatest and coolest Papyrus right now for real.

It won't be easy, you'll have to really work

Unlike my lazy brothers at their posts!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Hey!!!

[PAPYRUS]

You're doing a great job so far, little human

But since I'm a skeleton, I'm not getting tired at all.

Okay, maybe I'm losing some breath

But not as much as you, wait, be careful! Don't fall!

This is the longest a human has lasted against me—

[SANS and STELLINY]

That's because you haven't met her yet.

[PAPYRUS]

So maybe we can take a little, well-deserved break

And lie down for a while?

NO! Papyrus never rests!

I fooled you, human! Papyrus doesn't do things with his eyes closed and snoring!

[SANS and STELLINY]

Hey bro, what you're saying is called sleeping—

[PAPYRUS]

They bring out the great backup dancers!

Stop right there, human, listen to me

I'm the great, coolest Papyrus, and you can never be free!

I'll keep you here, held captive by riddles and puzzles

Unless you want to leave, and you ask me very nicely!

You can do anything if you want it hard enough and determined enough

And we know we've got what it takes, we've got heart and big dreams, we've got pride!

Undyne might be upset, but I don't care

Because I finally made a new friend, or at least I tried really hard!

So if you want to make a new, great, cool friend

Get ready to have fun, because I know we're going to have a blast.

Just like it seems you were ready for this battle!

Because I'm almost out of letters and I'm almost done.

What did you say? Do you want to be my friend?

[SANS and STELLINY]

Word-a-broadly Sanskrit we knew would happen.

[PAPYRUS]

GUYS, JUST STOP WITH THE PUNS!

Today is a great day, I have a new friend, and she's a human!

[SANS and STELLINY]

We knew you'd make friends with one.

[enbyleighlines]

Leigh plays Tellius prt 6

It's time for the 4-part exp extravaganza that is Day Breaks!

I love how they imply that Soren's heritage gave him pro navigation abilities. Sure, Micaiah gets to see the future, read minds, and heal mortal wounds, but hey! At least Soren doesn't have to worry about getting lost.

I present this without comment.

I'm kind of sad that this forbidden bird magic never gets brought up again. All we know is that it's a song called the Dirge of Ruin. I imagine it's like a magic nuke of some sort? But sadly, we shall never know for sure.

This was the SECOND TIME I had to restart because of Ilyana. And look, I'm not foolish enough to rely on Shade, but twice I accidentally left Ilyana in the danger zone, and both times I was like well maybe she'll be okay. Shade has to trigger sometimes, right?

The answer is no. It never triggers. Shame on me for hoping.

I know what Ike means, but out of context, this line is so funny.

Also, for those of you who are wondering, this is Ike's reaction every time someone tries to set him up on a date.

Is this an unpopular opinion? Maybe it is. But I genuinely love Boyd's stupid Viking helmet and high fur collar. Also that custom-made axe? I named it Throwd.

That was a low blow, Boyd. I love how unamused Mist looks. She already knows he's about to say some dumb shit. I love Boyd, but he does have terminal foot-in-mouth disease, and he 100% deserved the smiting he got from Mist here.

Ike's growing exasperation with Oliver during this scene is so damn funny. I wish I had gotten the satisfaction of killing him, but unfortunately, Janaff swooped in to land the finishing blow before I could even get most of my units over the middle swamp.

I love Ike's genuine wonder during this scene. It's a nice callback to the base conversation with Devdan, where Devdan lectures Ike about slowing down to appreciate the simple pleasures of life, so that he doesn't get burnt out before the war even begins. Ike is a character who ultimately fights for the world and the people in it, because he genuinely cares. He's far from naive or optimistic, but his capacity for love, admiration, and respect for life is so wholesome. The horrors of war and the loss of his father initially makes this difficult for him, as he loses sight of anything but revenge, but Ike's journey is about ultimately remaining true to his character, even as he grows and matures.

I love how Sanaki phrases this: "You will resign yourself." It's clear to her that this is the last thing Ike wants, and doesn't bother to convince him that it's an honor.

Oh, Ike. Even as he resigns himself to receiving peerage, he cannot help but make his disdain for nobility crystal clear. This is another aspect of Ike I love so much. He absolutely despises the upper class, and he does not once try to hide it.

And that's the end of Day Breaks! I managed to get most of my A-team into second tier. I'll probably include an update of everybody's stats in the next post, since this is the halfway point of the game, and I want to get a sense of how close I am to achieving the goals that I set in the beginning.

[x-authorship-x]

Okay so i was thinking about the hope au and I have to say that Shisui's dynamic with Kakashi in this fic series holds a special in my heart (maybe bc they're some of my favorites lol). I adore the whole squad but there's just something about their dynamic to me. Like the respect for each other's emotional and physical boundaries, the small but profound shows of support, the quiet comfort with each other, communicating through body language, just the genuine respect/protectiveness/trust in each other!

Shisui learning some of the Hatake behaviors to the point of using them to better communicate/understand Kakashi (my favorite moments), they way they can understand each other silently or through doublespeak- having entirely different conversations than what's spoken out loud, Shisui looking up to Kakashi and for his approval but not idolizing him, Shisui feeling comfortable teasing him, Kakashi allowing physical contact bc it means a lot to Shisui and Shisui letting him be the one to initiate it most times bc he's aware of Kakashi's issues with it, Shisui pretending to not notice moments of vulnerability because it makes Kakashi uncomfortable, Kakashi silently digging up information (the tracking mission, training with Gai, etc) and Shisui being entirely aware of it, Shisui refusing to leave Anbu before Kakashi and saying it directly to the Hokage, Kakashi being protective when Tiger confronted Shisui about Parrot, Shisui telling Kakashi the truth about his father even though he was concerned about the consequences because he felt he deserved the truth, Kakashi being worried about possibly losing a pack member and Shisui making sure he knew he wasn't leaving the squad, Kakashi walking Shisui to the anbu dorms and quietly sitting in his room bc he and the others knew Shisui shouldn't be alone at that moment, etc

Also just- side note I'd love to hear more about your ideas for Hatake clan culture and how it effected Kakashi growing up and his relationships with other characters

Oh anon, is it bad to say I completely agree when it's my own fic? Who cares, I love what I did with Kakashi lmao

It's just... I see them like two legends, bruised and noble and aching and so incredibly competent it makes me a bit emotional tbh like... The bamf energy isn't "omg!!!! Power!!!!" It's "you guys... you're glowing 🥹" and I think that it's even more special that they can depend on each other- not only in a fight, but as a place of rest. Like "sit down, close your eyes, breathe... I'll hold the line." 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Kakashi and Shisui make me so emosh

Hatake Clan stuff is just *insert* [REGAL] [FERAL] [SAD] [GORGEOUS] [TEETH] [WHUMP] [GROWL] [SCARY] and i never get tired of Kakashi micro-expression and body-language-ing all over the place whilst Shisui (and, to a slightly lesser degree, SQ2+Gai) are like "yes yes tell me more yes i agree-" and everyone else is like 👀?? Tf

Sorry this isn't longer but it's a Friday and I'm knackered from work lol

[plutosdumps]

MCKENNA GRACE'S EP 'BITTERSWEET 16' SENTENCE STARTERS

UGLY CRIER

"she's such an ugly crier"

"she'll never be taylor swift"

"she can't get a grip"

"even at her best, she's a constant mess"

"i'm so mediocre"

"i'm not perfect, i'm a screw up"

"who could love me like this?"

"she's mature for her age, but too young for __"

"i'm such an ugly crier"

CITY LEAVER

"somehow we still got lost"

"wait, where are we?"

"it was pretty cute"

"it's not far from la to houston"

"you never told me you were visiting"

"it's so far from la to houston"

"say you miss me but i don't believe it"

"i don't want to hear it, i don't want to see it"

CHECKERED VANS

"a low blow even for you"

"my stupid heart was in your hands"

"you used me like your cigarettes"

"i should've known better"

"your words are made of daggers"

"you even ruined air for me"

"damn what the hell happened?"

"i swear you exist just to spite me"

BUZZKILL BABY

"are you happy now that i'm so miserable?"

"isn't that what you wanted from me?"

"you liked to pick me apart like daisies"

"wish i never even met you in the first place"

"you're such a buzzkill"

"it's almost impressive how much you still stress me out"

"you cut the deepest kind of wounds"

"almost had me with your shallow flattery"

"left me crying in the bathroom on my birthday"

"i cried like a funeral"

"i watched you pick me apart like daisies"

WHAT IF?

"what if you never parked your car in that parking lot?"

"what if i had just thought twice?"

"what if i walked away would you still have my heart today?"

"do i think of you now and then?"

"do i defend you to my friends?"

"would i do it all again?"

"i hate you and i never want to see your face again"

"what if you treated me with the kindness and respect i deserve?"

"what?!"

"maybe i'd have stayed with you"

"i deleted all our photos"

"i love it 'cause it's like we never met"

POST PARTY TRAUMA

"i must look so dumb"

"i don't know why i try to be honest"

"i just can't do parties"

"i deserve to be alone"

"now my cover's blown"

"i should just go home"

"how can i be myself?"

"i don't know who i am"

"words shoot out of their mouths like vomit"

"drinking lies like gin and tonic"

"my phone is dying"

"save me"

"i just need someone to take me home"

"need to go outside 'cause i'm nauseous"

"everybody here is so flawless"

"please stop talking shit"

"i'm so sick of high school drama"

COLLASPING STARS

"not really sure if you're human or just a heart killing machine"

"i'm trying to see if you ever did care about me"

"i really am trying so hard not to be mad"

"i'm lashing out 'cause i'm so sad"

"i say i don't but i really do miss what we almost could've had"

"it was close but no cigar"

"almost kissed in your car"

"now we're just collasping stars"

"i say i don't but i really do"

"i don't even know what's become of me"

BITTERSWEET 16

"i thought that i'd checked off some boxes"

"keep kicking my bucket list right down the street"

"they say i'm too young to think about love"

"they say i'm too young to think about love but without it i feel incomplete"

"i'll lie here, right here"

"less melodramatic, more anticlimactic"

"i'm all out of tears"

"when i was younger i used to wonder if i'd have a boyfriend"

"he'd tell me i'm pretty and make me feel nice"

"but i just feel shitty"

"my childhood's wasted and i'm scared to fix it"

"maybe i should get this life thing figured out"

"is it downhill from here?"

"i refuse to believe they're the best of my years"

"my mind makes up stories but they sure don't help"

"like a candle burning out"

[chaoslynx]

Soo idk where to start lol but I just wanted to thank you for your immense service in this fandom! I'm new to it since I finished watching BF a few days ago, randomly stumbling upon your fics has been brightening my evenings. Just..wow. the way the characters are depicted with so much care and love, the thousands of ways intimacy is shown, the so delicate and respectful tackling of trauma and the very realistic and detailed portrayal of a post-canon future.. :')

And about this in particular, I happened to find one of your old posts on why the ending (at least the manga one, not the open one in the anime) is unsatisfactory. And how Ash DESERVED a better ending. You know I also felt that, I couldn't wrap my mind and accept that somehow, for a character like Ash. In the myriad of posts and people being like "it is what it is" or just justifying it in some way I found your post which also mirrored my kind of deep dissatisfaction? (can't find a better word tbh, haha)

And thanks to your post I didn't feel alone with my thoughts. So rn I'm like, happily living in a post canon world for AshEiji mentally, haha.

It was also eye opening how yes, people saying he was "beyond salvation", is in fact really disrespectful towards those who had a similar experience in their life and are recovering.

I don't deny it, I thought at first that maybe, my hope for Ash to be happy in a post canon scenario would indeed be hard for the "many reasons" some people were listing based on canon. I even thought, do I have a kind of "saviour complex" that didn't allow me to accept that and get the meaning behind that ending? ("maybe bc I study psychology" was also something that came to my mind to find a reason why it bothered me that much?)

Idk, in between all the people being devastated over the ending, the same ol' "cause the manga ending is canon", and people listing "why that ending for Ash makes sense" I just allowed myself to accept that yes, I can make my own ending if that disappoints me. I'm glad that some of your points in that post also made me realise so many things later on, that keeping aside what I really would like to imagine it to be, many things made sense on why that ending made not only me, but probably many others feel like it was "unacceptable", elaborating on arguments I didn't rationally thought about at first.

And this thanks for you fanfics too for entertaining me a lot rn ^^

So idk first of all sorry for this rant, and then just THANKS, keep going, hope you have nice days ahead of you, you rock. *runs away*

omg hi

I'm so glad you like my fics!! Eeeeeeeee

I've spoken about the ending a few times, and I'll say it again here: I fully believe that Ash deserved to live, and that the message that he "never would have been happy" is a very harmful one. No one is happy 24/7, but everyone can be happy often enough to make the sad moments worth it.

Ash dying makes sense from a literary perspective, but it's something I can't accept as "right" from a moral perspective. That's why I almost never write stories where Ash is dead. (I think I've only written one -- a request for Eiji visiting Ash's grave.)

As silly as it is, I hope my fics can bring you some comfort, at least in knowing that someone else thinks that Ash deserves to live as well.

No thank YOU!!! [also runs away]

[cepheusgalaxy]

.

I hate them

Why do they feel its ok to cross a boundary uve asked them not to?

Why to they get mad at me when I get hurt by that?

Why can't they just understand that's how I'm communicating with them? They feel like I'm "humiliating them" by not letting they take a piece if my food? It makes me feel bad okay? And its not like its a surprise. Ive already told them. Over and over again. And now, this time, I snap and get mad at them, they ask me what's wrong and I say "well i am mad at you for getting my food without permission" and they have the gut to blame me for that! They've cross a boundary I've already set before and enforced a hundred thousand times!

You are actively disrespecting me and each time you do that you're just telling me that I don't deserve to set boundaries.

Why are adults like that? I don't do that to you, because I respect you. You keep saying I don't but I do! I always avoid crossing nay boundary of yours because I know how it'd suck if/when someone does the same! Why can't you understand? Why do you keep comparing yourself to me? Yes I know you wish you had a father like the one you are to me but every time I'm sad with you you just refuse to hear me. You never listen! That's why I didn't want to talk! Because everytime its just you talking and you never listen to me!

I've already told you all the reasons why I'm upset. I've already told you many times and many different simple ways to avoid that in the future.

But you keep going!

It hurts okay? So, yea, maybe I'll snap at you this time. Because you keep getting on my nerves, and I always try not to care a lot and just talk things through because I knew it'd end like this. And I didn't even do anything! I got mad, expressed my feelings to you and then went on calming myself! I just proceeded to eat and read my stuff! And then you thought it was utter disrespect because I'm mad at something you did!

I hate you! I hate them I hate them I hate them so much

Why do they never listen?

[cinhomi]

HI RORA I sent you an ask yesterday about how apparently my ask did not get eaten, just my notifs cause i have your notifs on and tumblr never sent the notif about the ask that got answered-

and then tumblr ate that ask. how ironic.

anyways yes! I am so sorry that I've been inactive sending asks, I got a nasty cough and have been coughing my lungs out for the past few days 💀 it's much better now tho! hope uni has been treating you well (on the other hand here uni can eat my ass-)

yeah small update on moot guy: well a few days ago he said that he'd be occasionally online if he had time to reply to me, and then today he sent me this really long message about how he'd be helping out with his prof and his prof would teach him stuff, so he'd be really busy and he was sorry that he'd be leaving me with nothing. said he'd be thinking of me a ton no matter what. I sent a really short answer bc I wasn't sure what to say. he apologized again and said he was sorry and please don't be mad...I think he's having a panic attack as he posted on his blog. 💀💀 I love him and I wish this isn't ending this way but god if this shit isn't tiring atop my already very loaded plate. at the end, I'm a girlie who believes firmly in equal standing, so there's no point if he'll be gone, I guess. if he won't reach out, then I won't come back.

anyways, enough sad updates here! (skzflix broke my goddamn heart) aside from skz, who's your favourite musical artist? I'm curious 👀

- titracha nonnie :3 (literally copying this ask rn in case tumblr eats it again 😩) (second time sending this ask help)

hi sweetie! I did imagine you sent something but it disappeared again, happy to receive your asks again and to know that you're doing better now 😊 and yeah, I got this one twice but it happens often, don't know why! tomorrow I'll take a day to stay home and work on some projects so hmm it's kicking me hard and it hurts but I'll get through it in a way or another :)

I understand caring about someone and all but we all have limits. you're right and you have to treat yourself like you deserve and yes, we have to respect others but when things get to the point where we are stressed/sad/anxious because of a situation we're in it's time to slow down or stop. it's exacly what you said at the end, "if he won't reach out, then I won't come back" you got straight to the point. I'm sorry this is happening... I already said that I've been in the same situation (more or less, maybe a bit more intricate) and it's a saddening experience. hope you'll be good soon.

skzflix was devastating and I could talk about it endlessly because I love skz lore sm, with all the theories and stuff!!

and you know who makes these things too? Twenty Øne Piløts, my favorite band of all times! been a fan since 2016 and no one could ever take their place... they literally saved my life.

but I listen to all genres of music so I have a pretty long list of artists I like... I generally prefer death metal (yeah I'm serious I'm a metalhead lol), visual-kei, and all that hard/chaotic music. it's actually a very difficult question for me, always, so I generally send my spotify account to people to make them understand a bit!

if I really have to choose someone beside TØP it's Diaura, another band. I can't list anyone else or I'd feel guilty and want to say everyone... take a look at my playlists if you'd like, or at my followings!

if you want to know for k-pop, beside SKZ being my ult group I love BTS, NCT (all units) and recently Ateez too... I'm back from a long break so yeah, I'm starting to know them just now haha (as for girl groups I don't like them too much but I enjoy (G)-Idle and LESSERAFIM a lot). fav korean solist rappers are BewhY, Villain and Gwangil Jo!

[mellow-worlds]

The fact that T didn't mention me in his "diary" entry. The fact that he cancelled plans when nobody but me would show up. The fact that I thought he could be the one who liked me most. The fact that F never wants to do anything with us. The fact that D isn't here. The fact that G only ever talks to me because there's noone else. The fact that I lied to everybody. The fact that I lied to Snoopy. The fact that I'm so sad all the time. The fact that I'm not sad enough. I'm not sad enough. Maybe I should sh again.

The fact that none of my friends like me. I'm not close to any of them. I always keep it superficial. Idk what to do. I'm a little cold. At least I'v elost a little bit of weight. I started doing intermittent fasting. I'm scared of stagnating now. The fact that my friends won't like me more if I lose weight. Strangers might. But my friends will notice... That's worth the world. If I die, it's because my friends would notice. Is that too much? The fact that my frineds won't like me more after discovering that I'm in pain. The fact that my friends... I love my friends...... what to do? I'm kind of sad. Idk how to deal with the fact that no one likes me. I'm not dealing with it at all. I feel numb. I kind of accept it? Wish it were different... don't know how to change it. dont think I could.

The fact that I can't decide between being serious and respectable or being all sweet and like a child or literally just a girl. Idk what to do and how to behave. I suck. GOSH. GOSSSHHHH. The fact that I#m not sad enough. The fact that I'm not sad enough. This has probably been the worst week I've had in a long, long time and I'm not sad enough. Maybe I'll be sadder if I sh. That's no reason to do it. I feel like I've completely grown out of sh. I've hated these scars so much that I guess I really don't want any new ones. But...... I keep thinking that nobody ever sees my thighs anyway. Gosh I just want to be happy in front of my friends. I always feel numb deep down but at least I can fake it, then. I don't really fake it, thougj. I really don't fake it.

I hate fasting. I hate fasting in the evenigns. I won't stop. Maybe I'll shift my cycle. I wish I was dead. I want to lose more weight. Gosh I hate fasting. I really hate fasting. I HATE IT. I hate it in the evenings. The fact that I'll probably gain it all back... it's fine. this is not an ed. I'm eating a lot actually. I'm not even too hungry. this is not anorexia, i just fast. fasting is not anorexia. i#m not close to that at all. i want to die. i want to die. it'd be so nice. I just want to not wake up. I want to eat. priorities. gosh. im so sad. not sad enough ahhahahahahha see i can laugh. gosh. what am I doung. I wanted to watch a movie an hour ago. i shoudl do taht instead of whining. when the song's finished. alr. alr. im in pain. my throat.......

the fact that t didn't care to mention me. The fafct that I don't exist for other people. The fact that F has been messaging me a lot on ig. Doesn't mean anything but I get cocky enough to think that he likes me in at least some way. I want to die. F doesn't care for me. I dodn't deserve him anyway. song ended. nvm. not watching the movie yet. i want to die. NFWAJKNDFWJAKN THE FACT THAT I HAVE TO DO UNI WORK TOMORROW MAKES ME WANT TO DIE it#s not even a lot but it makes me so anxious. It makes me so anxious.... how will I pass even any exam..... ill get expelled from my course.......... im the stupidest bitch out there. i'm so fohcking stupid. i want to die. can't even fill out a simple paper.... ill do it tomorrow and I#ll be fine. ill be fine. ill be fine. i want to watch a movie but it's so late. makes me not want to watch it but watch 3 hours of yt in my bed instead. ISTG if i wake up after 3 hours of sleep again today I#ll kill someone. hopefully me. ok I'll go brush my teeth. maybe. when the song is done. I'll definitely go brush my teeth though. I've been watvhing so many Sims lps lately. by call me kevin. far too many. gosh I want to die. my throat hurts. I love the smiths. i really do. gosh. i should be locked up but i'm not sad enough for that. what should I do? ok song is over. now...

[septembersghost]

You know I wasn’t even a jaylor shipper I just admired the love story portrayed by Taylor’s lyrics. No matter what happened to end the relationship, these were two individuals that loved each other immensely and shared their lives and families for 7 years. I genuinely feel sad for them and I just want to ask them if they’re doing okay. Even tho I never really paid attention to joe I was distantly grateful for what he’d done for taylor and so I hope that they’ll both be able to move forward and that fans will stop disrespecting him and just let go

can i confess to you that in this situation i don't even really understand what "shipper" means when the fandom uses that term because we're discussing real human beings, not fictional characters, who, as you said, spent seven years sharing their love and lives and friends and families. they lived together, that's a combined journey! i feel like "shipping" implies rooting for a story or for something that's tenuous, not as applicable to people in a long-term, committed relationship.

it's completely okay for fans to not be individually invested in joe (although i think some of the nastiness and hatred that was aimed at him for years while he was the partner in her life, and such a good, safe part of it, was quite weird! but not being interested generally is fine!), but recognizing the love they had and what it meant is normal. she shared that openly and beautifully with us. i will always be grateful for the fact that he was there when he was, when she was suffering from so many outside factors, that she found something grounded and genuine and it helped her, it was salvational for her exactly when she needed that, and look at the incredible work she created and how she flourished in that time. being with him helped her grow and heal, and she didn't have to do that alone, and i think it's valuable to remember that you shouldn't have to face those moments by yourself to still be strong and brave, to still have your voice. just because they didn't end up in the same place, or wanting the same things, whatever it was that happened, it doesn't erase what they had and all they shared together. nothing makes the love they had untrue, it was still important and bright, and i imagine she's emerged from that knowing even more about herself and about her desired path.

it's hard for me to understand the perspective of...i don't know, almost cheapening or trying to change the meaning of what they had in a dark way like some of fandom is doing? it's such a different situation from any others before it. we can feel empathy and sadness for them that it ended, wish the best for them moving forward, and honor that what they had was real and rare and a lovely connection. maybe it wasn't meant to last forever, and that's okay, it was precious in its time. they'll both have that as part of themselves wherever life takes them, even in other loves, and that's not a bad thing! there's no reason we have to disrespect that, or to go after him (although i don't think swifties should be directly going after the men rightfully deemed "bad boyfriends" either, and don't think that helps her, but i digress). obviously i care about her in my heart as an artist and person first and foremost, but i'll always hold some space for joe too. if taylor has any further things she wants to share through her music, she will eventually, but i feel like they deserve some respect and space, and i just wish them any healing they need and hopes for new happiness in the future.

/rambling thank you for sharing this anon, i agree with you <3

[madraleen]

Attack on Titan - Hajime Isayama Vol.28-29: The Commentary Wherein I Completely Lost It

(a warning: from hereon i start calling eren “devil child.” it’s a coping mechanism.)

-EWW ZEKE'S SPINAL FLUID IN THE WINE BOTTLES? (also i don't trust zeke, what is eren doing, oh my god)

-i need to know. i just need to know. has eren gone off the rails.

-does eren know this, that they're making beast-linked titans, does eren know this. what does eren know

-EREN? THE DEVIL CHILD? IN OUR RESTAURANT?! AAAAHHHH... uhhh... eren why are you titan-threatening us, goddamn man (i find it calming to call him devil child. his actions hurt me less that way)

-aw bless them, they're trying so hard to save falco, bathing him and all

-devil child, do you actually want to tell us something or are you just going to stare-scare mikasa and armin. also gabi please don't do anything stupid, girl, please not now

-this chat is not going to go well. this chat will only hurt us. JESUS CHRIST EREN "KEEP YOUR HANDS ON THE TABLE"?! WTH DO YOU THINK MIKASA OF ALL PEOPLE WILL DO TO YOU FFS ARGH i am enraged

-i don't know if devil child is right, but it HAS come to my attention that genius strategist armin has not done that much post-time skip

-so... mikasa senses the founder titan, that's why she's gung-ho on protecting eren? wait but. eren got the titan much later. how could mikasa have obeyed him when he had just met her? that doesn’t make sense, WHY IS NO ONE POINTING OUT THAT THIS DOESN’T MAKE SENSE

-DEVIL CHILD WHAT ARE YOU SAYING EREN HOW DARE YOU IT IS NOT THEIR FAULT! WHATEVER THEY ARE IS NOT THEIR FAULT HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU HOW DARE YOU YOU STUPID LITTLE- SHUT UP!

-what? what? you've always hated her? HOW THE FUCK DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU! you didn't! you couldn't have! I WAS THERE WITH YOU IN PART 1, YOU CARED, YOU DIDN'T hate her! what are you saying

-believe you me eren, armin's punch has nothing to do with bertolt, it's courtesy of the readers.

-WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BEAT UP ARMIN

-is eren for real, i don't understand. knowing these alleged truths is one thing. being cruel is another. why. how. why. also devil child, why are YOU free but armin is half-bertolt in this scenario? you have THREE titans

-you didn't say anything like that, devil child. you never asked them where zeke is, what are you talking about, you just started hurting them

-you know what i hate? i hate the fact that this intrusive thought keeps coming to me, "would it have come to this if erwin was alive?"

-yes, levi, exactly, like one big awful joke. you remain my one shining light. exactly, "waiting for us after all that death was this farce?"

-WHY AM I LAUGHING THROUGH MY RAGE WHY DOES THIS WHOLE TRAIN-WRECK MAKE THINGS MORE INTRIGUING! I HATE EVERYTHING!

-”your deaths meant something. at last, i'll be able to prove it" WHEN DID LEVI BECOME THE HEART OF THE STORY

-oh goody. levi vs 30 titans. wow. it's just... torture after torture after torture, isn't this, this pesky time-skip *nervous chuckle*

-i'm so sad. levi doesn't deserve this. no one does. his face. goddammit

-TINY LEVI IN THE BACK COMING FOR ZEKE OH MY GOD GET HIM TINY LEVI

-for all of eren's "fight!" you know who's the one who actually does it? levi our lord and savior

-ripping apart the titan to throw at levi. classy mr beast classy. geh -.-

-hange doesn't deserve this

-i don't doubt zeke's horrible childhood, but FUCK ZEKE

-ah! AH! AH! AH! ZEKE MADE HIMSELF EXPLODE! I DID NOT EXPECT THIS!

-it's hard to read school castes now that eren is the devil child

-i'm sure, i'm SURE levi wouldn't die in an explosion, that would be anticlimactic, BUT... maybe that's a good great perfect opportunity for some backstory? 

-can i just say. my respect for hange rises with every panel they're in

-"our euthanization plan' jesus christ. AND THAT'S YOU, EREN?! after everything, you're like 'ah yes, euthanization sounds good' ?! FIGHT!

-THAT IS NOT YOUR CHOICE TO MAKE EREN, IT IS NOT YOUR CHOICE TO EUTHANIZE ARGH ARGH

-levi. my heart hurts. i... don't suppose ackermans regenerate fingers...

-hange for president. seriously, like... seriously. HANGE WHAT A HUMAN

-i know we hate gabi a little bit or a lot, but please don't hurt her, eren. please. how did it come to this. to me begging eren of all people not to hurt a prisoner child

-okay. OKAY! but when did eren turn CRUEL. like even zeke isn't CRUEL when addressing most people. eren's negative arc is almost TOO blatant to be real

-yes jean my only hope, could eren have some secret motive for hurting mikasa and armin? i agree with your line of thinking but i'm too scared to hope. i half think these kind of arguments -secret motive, mind control, brain-washing- are there to represent the readers' thoughts, just to then say actually no, he's the villain now

-how did yelena not understand that armin isn’t serious with the ‘noble intentions’ comment

-errr, the panel with eren over jaws' jaws is really cool though

-pieck: "did you really think i'd sell out my friends?" meanwhile devil child be dancing over his comrades' broken souls

-HOW YOU LIKE THAT, YELENA?! HOW YOU LIKE EREN NOT LISTENING TO YOU EITHER HUH?! HOW DOES IT FEEL TO FEEL LIKE US, YELENA?! HOW DOES IT FEEL TO ASK "EREN, WHY?" ?! HA?!

-incredible that the 104th, levi and hange are actually in the safest places to be right now, ie Not There.

-war hammer titan is pissing me off. no matter whose side its on, it has unfair advantage

-i mean, reiner, honestly, same. "i just want this to be over."

-i haven't seen eren's face as soft as when he sees beast zeke in ages, i wanna punch something

-uhh... defend eren...? the 104th? what's it gonna be, boys and mikasa?

-STOP THE PRESSES, ARMIN IS USING HIS BRAIN! EVERYONE STOP AND LISTEN! HISTORY IS BEING WRITTEN!

-i want to believe you re: eren, armin. by god i want to believe you, as much as mikasa does. i want to believe you so much that it brings me to tears. it's like, i lose hope, and then you say something and i'm like BUT YOU'RE RIGHT, and then eren appears and i lose hope again.

-GABI CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT YES GIRL SHINE. i love gabi. truly a stand-out from part two.

-"also, i'm in love with you" falcoooo, justice for falco

-THE POETRY WHEN GABI SNATCHES OFF FALCO'S ARMBAND AS HE DID HERS! AHHH

-the times i've said 'i love you' and 'i hate you' to this manga, in rapid succession, are ridiculous and concerning

-eren is more eren with his hair down and all over his face. i renounce the manbun

-levi looks so bored being eaten by a zombie in the school castes

[jette-rantsona]

I've been thinking about what I'd say at my mother's funeral lately. Fucking killer opening, I know. Growing up, my dad always wrote the obituary speech. I always respected his ability to say these beautiful things about dead people. He always leaves people teary-eyed and buzzing about every word. He's this conduit of healthy grief. He did his own mother's funeral and I was mixed with feelings of sadness. Sadness from mourning his loss. Seeing him stand up there and recount everything he loved about his mom. Hearing stories I'd never heard and watching him as he tried to make it through it all, just as he'd rehearsed downstairs all night. And the sadness of knowing that I didn't feel the same way towards my own mom. I don't think I could say anything remotely as joyous as he did for his mom. I don't know if that's something I should feel. maybe it takes time. Maybe one day I'll look at her and find a way to, at the very least, lie about her. To tell people that I loved her with no authors note at the bottom of the page.

I love her in an annoying way. The way that someone doesn't deserve on paper. The way that keeps me up at night trying to grasp at understanding it. Because she has done very few things to deserve how I feel. She's done so much more to make me hate her. Yet I feel this pull to care about her. To check up on her. To stop by every once and a while and have lunch. I don't know if that's healthy. It feels like I'm constantly ignoring the red flags. I'm allowing my abuser to have a relationship with me. I don't know how to tangibly break away from that.

So I guess my fear is that I will never be in a place where I know how I feel about her. I need to find someway to break away from her or to finally figure out what there is to love about her. Maybe one day I could give her an obituary like my dad does.

[butisittho]

I recently got to thinking, and I realized that when I was a little girl I already had self-injury tendencies. At least I think so? I remember that when I got really angry I would go to my room and hit myself in the head until I calmed down. I don't remember my mom or dad (lol) telling me not to do it, I think they preferred to leave me to get over the tantrum. I did it for quite a few years if I'm not mistaken, but by the time I was a teenager I grew out of it. I almost never did it, only sometimes. I often wonder if these problems with anger and rage come from my dad, maybe because he raised me or maybe genetically. Eventually I realized that I had trouble dealing with my anger, so I tried to work on it myself. It kind of worked, now I can resist the urge to talk back or get angry at once (especially with my mom, mostly just her). Still I don't think I fixed it, because I'm still angry, I just don't show it much. When I was a kid I was so afraid of being just like my dad, of seeing an exact replica of his violence in me. Anytime I would get angry and lose control (like most little kids do) I thought to myself god, am I just like him? Is this inevitable? I don't want to be. I want to be better. I want to show my mom the love and respect she deserves. I want to make my little sister feel safe enough with me to open up and talk. I want to tell my big brother I'll love him regardless of how he does in school, but also that I'll always love and care for him so much that I won't be able to not care about his grades.

I want people to know I love them. More than anything, I'm scared I've grown so accustomed to think of myself and my feelings as an imposition that I forget to demonstrate how much I cherish and treasure the people I love.

I think I tend to withdraw from people, from my friends. It doesn't do me any good. But it's also true that I'm more comfortable in my comfort zone at home, with a baggy t-shirt covering me, so no one can judge me. More comfortable, but sad. Then I see my friends' stories on Instagram, I see that they are having a good time, that they love each other, and I feel so left behind. And I wonder, did I love too much but show too little? I don't know, I never do.

[mushroompoisoning]

.

i don't wanna do this anymore. i don't wanna be here. i'm falling further and further behind in school and i can TELL my dads starting to lose faith that i'll catch up and my moms annoyed and they don't understand what i mean when i say i can't and i hate this and i want it to end. my mental health has just been getting worse and worse and it's not getting any better. i wish i could help myself but i overthink everything into an inescapable hole and despite my self awareness i'm too fucking USELESS to change. because i just can't fucking change for some reason. no matter how self aware i am about any of my toxic traits, no matter how much i hate myself for them i keep failing to change them. i'm an asshole and everyone keeps telling me i'm not and i'm a liar and i HATE IT.

and i tell myself i want them to hate me but i don't. i want people to validate me to tell me no no you're a good person you'll make it it's not your fault and i'll tell them they're wrong because they ARE but i want to hear them say it so so bad. i want people to tell me i'll be okay that i don't have to worry and i'll never believe them but i want them to say it.

i don't deserve any of the friends i have. i don't deserve any help. i can't be helped. i'm stuck where i am and time is moving forward and i can't fucking stop it and it's leaving me behind and i deserve all of this. i deserve everything that's happening to me because it's my fault. there was so much i could've done to prevent getting here but i wanted to be the victim soooo bad and now here i am.

and the worst part is that i can't just fucking kill myself. because i'm scared. i'm a fucking coward. and i'm so fucking full of myself that i think my death will effect people. that i think me killing myself will hurt them for more than a day or maybe two. the only reason i'm still alive is because every time i think about ending my life i think about my friends online wondering where i went. or being sad because we were in the middle of some kind of story that i now can't be apart of. or going through old dms or god forbid fucking missing me.

i'm just living for other people. i have been for so long now i feel. and yet i'm so fucking selfish. i force myself to care more than i do because i'm scared of being a bad person. and every night i have to remind myself that that makes me a bad person and then i wait for someone to validate me and tell me i'm not. hell i'm writing this entire fucking post as a cry for help hoping someone will tell me i'm wrong about myself even though i won't believe them and never will.

i've never once been able to believe someone when they tell me i'm not annoying them or that they don't secretly hate me. i always assume everyone's lying to me because they don't wanna seem rude. then i tell myself how dare i think i'm worthy of respect in their eyes and yet somehow they're still lying. just for the fun of it i guess. but how dare i assume they're a mean person like that. how dare i assume that making fun of me makes someone bad.

i don't know. i'm tired. it's 330am and i probably have school tomorrow even though i'll probably still be sick but i'll just want to kill myself more if i don't go.

i don't want to keep holding onto a life i've already fucked out of guilt or fear of hurting people. i want all my friends to hate me i want them to tell me i don't deserve to live so that i can just go. but they won't and i don't know why because i don't care about them. i do but i don't and it makes me want to scream and cry and rip my hair out and bash my head in. i don't want to be a bad person i don't want them to think i'm a bad friend so i do as much as possible to seem like i care so they won't think i'm bad but that just sounds like it makes me bad. i don't know anymore. i wish all my friends would hate me already.

god this rant is so fucking egotistical. all just me me me i i i whatever the fuck else. as if i deserve sympathy for just sitting around and rotting away and complaining about my very privileged life. i don't deserve anything i have.

as much as i want someone to read this i really don't. i want everyone who reads it to just keep strolling and agree with everything i said about myself. i'll be embarrassed if anyone actually tries to care. if you do think about responding you probably shouldn't. i won't believe you. nothing you tell me will stick unless it's agreeing with the vent.

alright screaming into the void over. thats enough pathetic wallowing in self pity publicly for tonight.