#there are criticisms to be made about cosmetic surgery as an industry certainly
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It's really a shame that Puzzle Pieces by Saint Motel is so fun and catchy for being as weirdly judgy as it is
#there are criticisms to be made about cosmetic surgery as an industry certainly#but “i can tell from one look at you that you're addicted to changing your face like it's fashion” is really not a fantastic take
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You literally today said that you stan a movie that portrays rape and sexual harassment against women as hilarious and boys will be boys activity out of “spite” because people don’t universally like it, but you’re too much of a feminist to consider cosmetic surgery to be acceptable - unless the person getting the cosmetic surgery has a good enough reason.
The actress who portrayed Houlihan in the movie was sexually harassed on set by fellow members of the cast and crew, not to even mention several of the plot points of the movie (or the book on which its based, which is even more extreme; and the author of whom came to hate the TV series that it inspired for being too left-wing). But we’re killjoys if we don’t love the movie as a result and you’ll claim to love it out of spite… but adults are idiots for wanting cosmetic procedures unless they sufficiently self flagellate about the patriarchy?
Weird hill to die on, IMO.
I am more concerned about an industry that profits on women's insecurities created and reinforced by patriarchy at risk to their health than I am about a fifty-year-old black comedy, yes.
But if you want to talk about MASH, Richard Hornberger disliked both the TV show and the movie for a number of reasons, including being too left-wing and too sexual. The book is actually overall less misogynistic than the movie in my opinion, though it certainly has its issues as well (primarily in one chapter).
MASH (1970) is left-wing, arguably more left-wing than the show, and definitely more left-wing than the later seasons of the show. MASH (1970) was explicitly anti-war, which the book was not. The screenwriter, Ring Lardner Jr., was one of the Hollywood Ten and was blacklisted during the McCarthy era. A lot of the claims that MASH is "really" about Vietnam or is using the Korean War to comment on the Vietnam War are much more applicable to the movie than they are to the TV show. The director, Robert Altman, created a film that had much stronger resemblance to Vietnam than to Korea, to the point where the opening text mentioning Korea was included at the studio's request.
MASH was a hugely innovative movie and its success was unexpected. When it was released, people were still not sure about having comedy and dark, serious matters in the same movie. It conveyed a message about war and it did it very successfully. I never said I didn't mind the misogyny in the movie or that the male actors were great guys who treated Sally Kellerman well and I certainly never said the misogynistic actions in the movie were "boys will be boys" antics. There are other things in the movie. The last third or so of that movie is football game that Our Heroes win by cheating.
Also, a lot of the people who made the TV show liked the movie and the book. Even Feminist Alan Alda had seen and liked the movie. Personally, I have to appreciate that the show would not exist without the movie and the book.
I also never asked anyone to self-flagellate about patriarchy but I do think people who want cosmetic surgery should really think about why they want it and I think that goes double for people who take any criticism of the cosmetic surgery industry personally.
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What does a Feminist Look Like?
In the past couple years, a new fashion item came to market. The slogan, “This is What a Feminist Looks Like” has accompanied, “The Future is Female” and, “My Uterus, My Choice” in adorning plain tee-shirts across the chest for the socially conscious shopper. I have seen these worn by men, women and non-binary persons alike. The intention of the designer and wearer is to announce their political stance to whoever they encounter. Yet, the shirt could have achieved this using other phrasing such as “This is Who a Feminist is” or even, most directly, “I am a Feminist”. The specific wording of the item can convey the diverse, and possibly unexpected, appearances of feminists. The garment acknowledges that one homogenous face of feminism does not exist nor can someone determine whether someone is feminist based on their appearance. Yet, the seemingly simple proclamation leads to the question, what does a feminist look like?
Saying you are a feminist or something is feminist does not magically make it so. This being true, it is impossible to say whether those who wear the shirts are actually feminists. The word feminist conjures up different images specific to who hears or reads it. A search on Google images for the word feminist features participants in the Women’s Marches, Beyonce dressed as Rosie the Riveter, Hillary Clinton and, fittingly, a number of people wearing the aforementioned “This Is What A Feminist Looks Like” tee-shirt. Many stereotypes of feminists exist; the pussy-hat wearing Feminazi, the hipster male feminist or the sexless career woman to name a few. None of these effectively encompasses the entirety of the feminist community. As feminists do not have one identifiable appearance, they also do not have one identifiable opinion on appearance and everything surrounding it.
Since the 1960s, women staged public displays rejecting the conventional beauty standards. For example, the legendary Miss America Protest included a scene of women throwing their bras, which embodied normative beauty pressures, into a fire. This incident was so powerful that bra-burner became a part of the English lexicon as synonymous with an enthusiastic feminist.Since then, the attempt to change or shirk male-imposed beauty standards has become fundamental issue. Body positivity campaigns flourish on social media, and the culture surrounding what is considered acceptable is beginning to shift. There seems to exist a universal consensus that beauty standards are bad. Still, the beauty and women’s fashion industry are both worth more than ever before. If women are starting to care less about looking like sexist ideals, why are these industries thriving?
To a certain extent, there exists the idea of “playing the game”. Here, women acknowledge the patriarchal desires and use them to their own benefit. A society is more likely to reward those who give society what it wants. If a woman succeeds due to profiteering off of conformation to gender norms, we do not see a successful woman but a traitor to feminism. For instance, Kylie Jenner was declared the youngest female self-made billionaire. Removed from her identity and the baggage it carries, the title of the youngest female self-made billionaire would be accompanied by admiration and applause from any women-supporting women. A twenty-one year old woman earning a fortune based on her own entrepreneurship unreliant on any man seems like a feminist triumph in a world rigged against female success. However, Kylie Jenner is hardly a feminist icon. Her body and face have been altered by plastic surgery; she owns a makeup line and posts seductive images on instagram. Comedic comparisons of her younger self and appearance after makeup and surgery are often accompanied by captions such as “This is Why I Have Trust Issues”, subversively perpetuating the perception of how deceitful women are. Simultaneously, Kylie Jenner seems to fit the unachievable male fantasy of a woman to the best of anyone’s abilities. This can even be evidenced by her ranking as the thirteenth top searched celebrity on PornHub in 2018. Kylie Jenner can either be seen as submitting to misogynistic beauty standards or taking advantage of them.
It is not strange or even judgemental to qualify success based on the means which are used to obtain it. Achievements that stem from immoral actions are regarded as undeserved or not worth celebrating. In “Feminism and the Politics of Appearance,”Amy Winter criticizes her perception of second wave feminism’s acceptance of any autonomous choice a woman makes about her body as feminist. She describes cosmetic surgery, dieting, weight loss surgery, and "body modification" as woman-hating behaviors. She draws a contrast between liberalism as a solely political philosophy and feminism as a system of values. She rejects the idea that feminism can encompass choices which conform to patriarchal mandates since “we can't be honest in our feminism if we pretend that making choices to harm our bodies and conforming to the dictates of a system that hates us is liberating and empowering” (Winter, 3). One of Winter’s grandest claims is that “As long as one's actions don't infringe on others' right to freedom, moral judgment about those actions is disallowed” (Winter 4) and that these accusations of intolerance and judgmentalness impede our ability to have meaningful discussions about the world we want to live in, and how to move toward those goals. Prominent here is the understanding that as women, we are both an individual and a member of the collective. It is irrefutable that is not reasonable or useful to call everything women do feminist simply because they are women or are doing it in the name of feminism. Often self-proclaimed feminists behave in very unfeminist ways. Feminism can mean very different things to different people. Feminism does not have a uniform platform, let alone a uniform face.
Winter’s argues that the society within which women must make choices about themselves and their bodies limits their ability to freely act because “systemic oppression is the framework within which we make individual choices...liberal political philosophy...does not recognize the impact of social power or powerlessness on individual choice” (Winter, 2).The class of men are privileged in that they have historically had power to influence the choices available to women . Called into question here is whether women ever have the capability to make completely autonomous choices or if every decision is manufactured by the patriarchal constructs of our society. Winter’s essay makes me recall when my ninth grade theology teacher lectured my class of all girls how our immodest dressing was not because our own desire to wear certain clothes but merely a product of manipulation by popular media and the fashion industry. I felt angered by her comments perhaps partially because I was a fourteen year old who wanted to wear short skirts and tank tops but more because of what they implied. I understood that popular styles and business had great influence over trends and the items I put on my body, but the implication was that I, like any young woman who wore clothing she deemed scandalous, was an unthinking, brainwashed sheep whose preferences were molded entirely by the images put before me. Furthermore, within this is the narrative that any choice a woman makes about her appearance is solely with consideration for the opinions of others, particularly men.
This condemnation of women’s attempts to regain control over their bodies without regard to the perception of men does not grant them the level of agency which they deserve. Some of her points begin to sound like the same rhetoric which men use to control women. Forcing women to anything they do not want to with their bodies is certainly a male practice which certain so-called feminist thinkers have co-opted to forbid certain personal bodily choices. Additionally, Winter attributes any insecurity to misogyny and any attempt to change that insecurity physically as contributing to that misogyny. Misogynistic attitudes do have responsibility for the rigid beauty and body standards which are enforced upon women from a young age. These unachievable ideals engrain a sense of insufficiency on those who fail to live up to them and can even distort one’s self-perception as they strain to conform to a rigid idea.
Ideally, all women would be able to accept themselves exactly how they look organically, and feminism would be the cure to any internalized feelings of insecurity due to beauty standards. Indeed, FemScore of the Feminist Perspectives Scale has shown that feminist beliefs decrease the internalization of body-related messages. The acknowledgement of the sources of beauty standards and the active understanding that these are not the truth serves to reduce their impact on self-perception. However, three women said they felt negative effects of feminism on their experiences with beauty. One woman spoke about how she “bought into the old style feminist antipathy towards clothing and makeup, but then decided that it was limiting [her] self-expression” (Taub, 16). Women have numerous reasons for altering their appearance. If none of these are actively offensive or hurtful to others, is it truly anyone else’s place to pass moral judgement on them?
To the extent that the personal is political, everyone must be conscious about how they present themselves to the world. In this way, things like clothes, makeup and even plastic surgery are a form of self-expression. Those who refute this have contorted feminism to grant themselves some platform of moral superiority from which to pass judgement on other women. To dictate the choices someone makes about their own appearance infringes on their freedom to express themselves truly or feel the most confident. Deeming certain beauty choices as feminist or anti-woman creates a toxic and exclusive culture within a community which already struggles enough with inclusivity. Divisiveness about something so unique to each person is never useful.
Works Cited
Winter, Amy. “Feminism and the Politics of Appearance.” GenderWatch, Off Our Backs, Nov. 2004,search-proquest-com.ccl.idm.oclc.org/genderwatch/docview/197131764/B32ADB2FD40843DF.
Feltman, Chandra E., and Dawn M. Szymanski. "Instagram use and Self-Objectification: The Roles of Internalization, Comparison, Appearance Commentary, and Feminism." Sex Roles 78.5-6 (2018): 311-24. ProQuest. Web. 4 Dec. 2019
Taub, Jennifer. “What Should I Wear? A Qualitative Look at the Impact of Feminism and Women’s Communities on Bisexual Women’s Appearance.” Journal of Bisexuality, vol. 3, no. 1, 2003, pp. 9–22. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&AuthType=sso&db=fyh&AN=MFS-10960934&site=ehost-live&scope=site.
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This Is Me, Tagged
Okay, get comfy – I got tagged twice, by talented Flickrites Mysi Anne and Sina respectively, so I’ve decided to do two sets of sixteen. The first set is mostly photography-related, and the second set is more personal. I tend to fill these things out thoroughly, so there’s a lot to read here, but since the internet gives most people the attention span of a flea on meth, I put some extra cleavage on display for those who feel the text is tl;dr. I hope you enjoy one or the other, or both. —–
1. My favourite photographer in recent years is Nuri Bilge Ceylan. It was his work that made me believe it was possible to photograph Turkey in the way that I wanted to. I was sick to death of tourist-bait pictures of whirling dervishes, hookah bars, and belly dancers, because Turkey isn’t about any of those things.
2. If you asked me to name ten other photographers whose work turns me on, most of the names would be people whose work I discovered on Flickr. You don’t have to be famous to rock me.
3. I chuckle at equipment snobs and their strutting and posturing about what snazzy gear you "must" have and what techniques you "must" use, because for all their official know-how, 95% of the time their oh-so-technically-perfect shots leave me bored. Although I like buying new equipment as much as the next person, it’s certainly not required to take good pictures. There’s a person in my Flickr contacts who takes the most amazing photos with his mobile phone, and another who rocks my world with his Lomo. Some people never get it through their heads that it’s not about the camera. In the industry we call this "having more money than sense."
4. I also laugh at people who think that digital post-processing isn’t part of photography, or is "cheating." What, you think film photographers of the past didn’t post-process? Please, do your homework – half an hour of research on the web will wipe out that little fantasy. The great majority of tools in Photoshop are just computer adaptations of manual darkroom techniques that have been widely used for many decades by just about every photographer of note. I’m not saying it’s necessary to process the hell out of every photo you take, but refusing to use all the tools available to you because of some weird misinformed pride seems silly to me.
5. I have this strange skill for remembering exactly where I was standing when I took any given photo, even if I took it 20 years ago in a place I only visited for a day. This has made geotagging a lot easier.
6. If post-processing fell off the face of the earth tomorrow, I’d probably lose my interest in digital photography pretty quickly. If I’m out shooting and it’s going really well, my chief thought is always, I can’t wait to get home and play around with these.
7. On the other hand, I almost never post-process film shots, because most of my film cameras are ones that are known for their specific effects (Soviet cameras and so forth), and I don’t feel the need to mess with that. I will fix cracks and damage in old prints, unless the damage makes the photo more awesome, which it often does.
8. Go ahead, gasp in horror if you want… I don’t really like B&W photography, except in cases of faux-vintage or actual old photographs. That’s not to say that I can’t appreciate the beauty of B&W photos or the talent that goes into making them, and a few of my favourite photographers do shoot primarily in B&W, but when people post a B&W and a colour version of the same photo, I always like the colour one better. I hear people say how they think B&W tells a more dramatic story, but I just don’t see that at all.
9. I don’t keep multiple versions of the same photo. I find it unnecessary, and potentially confusing, as I only ever process a photo one time, and then I’m done with it forever. I trash both my raw files and my PSDs when I’m certain have the final version of the photo. I have never, ever felt the desire to rehash old, stale raw files that have already been done. I always take a fresh supply of new shots if I want something to work on.
10. I have a huge offline library of both digital and film photos from years past. This year I’m going to work on getting them all up on Flickr.
11. My eyes are black, and although I think they look nice in real life, in photos they tend to look like lumps of coal shoved in my eye sockets. So I almost always level them up in post. I also enjoy playing around with the colour of them – I don’t think making eyes green or blue in a photo is any different than people wearing coloured contacts for fun certain days of the week. This is one of the few photos where my eyes are completely natural, because I thought the lumps of coal thing worked well in that particular shot.
12. Some photographers get arrested for the photography itself… I’m more likely to get arrested for associated breaking and entering. If I see a place that I want to get to to take photos, I get like a pit bull about it, and regardless of locks or restricted access, it’s very unlikely that you’ll convince me not to break in there. I’ll just politely agree with you that it’s a bad idea, and then I’ll wait until you fall asleep and I’ll sneak out. I’ll be back before you wake up, with a memory card full of awesome. Or, you’ll get woken by a phone call and have to come bail me out. Whichever.
13. I don’t wear makeup except on very special occasions, so if you see makeup on me in a photo, you can be 100% sure it was post-processed. I can’t stand having all that chemical gunk on my face, but I do think it looks nice, especially in pictures.
14. I love it when my female friends e-mail me a snapshot of themselves and ask me to "please fix it up." I don’t think photos of women (or any other subject) always have to be about concrete reality – a little fantasy is nice sometimes. The women I associate with are smart enough not to compare themselves to an edited photo, or even to want to look like that in real life. We can teach young girls those same values without having to resort to censorship. It’s good for kids to see and learn the difference between fact and fiction, and to appreciate the merits of both. If we start banning things, they won’t get the opportunity to learn to distinguish.
15. If you gave me a $1,000 gift certificate from my local camera shop, I’d buy an old-skool original Lensbaby, a Sigma 10-20mm, and the new Nikkor fiddy (the 1.4 – G, not D).
16. If you sent me on a slow trip around the world and told me I could only take one camera and one lens, I’d be perfectly happy with my D40 and the 18-200mm VR. I don’t need anything fancier than that for traveling, and I sure as hell don’t need anything heavier or larger.
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1. Photography is something I enjoy doing, but I’m not a particularly visual person. Music is who I am. I made my debut as a professional pianist at the age of 9, and as a professional singer at the age of 14. My major in university was music composition, and the second time I went to uni I did a degree in recording arts with a specialty in critical aural analysis.
2. I’m left-handed, but I don’t write in that weird, contorted, hand-twisted-backwards way that most left-handers do. I write like a normal person, just with my left hand instead of my right.
3. You wouldn’t know it from my public presence on the internet, but my language habits in everyday life would make a sailor blush. You know how Debra in Dexter talks? Yeah, pretty much like that. I always laugh at that antiquated line about how people who swear a lot do so to cover up for a poor vocabulary. That’s a crock – believe me, I know plenty of words, and I know how to use them correctly. Many of them begin with C or F, so what?
4. I’m going to be 36 this month, and I think I’m better-looking and more attractive now than I have ever been.
5. Five years ago at this time I weighed 265 pounds. Don’t ask me for the magic secret, because you already know there isn’t one. If there were, everyone would have done it by now, and there would never be any fat people in the world.
6. I’ve traveled to four continents, and lived on three of them.
7. I’m compulsively goal-oriented, and one of my goals for 2009 is to buy a new outfit every month, as I haven’t had any new clothes at all in almost five years. The ensemble you see in the photo is my outfit for January.
8. A few years ago I tore my ulnar collateral ligament, and was told that without surgery I would never regain the use of my thumb. I decided to trust my gut feeling instead of the doctor, and didn’t have the surgery. My hand is fine now, and aside from some minor twinges in humid weather, I can’t tell the difference between the hand that was injured and the one that wasn’t.
9. I have the kind of hair that makes people want to punch me. I get it cut once a year (I’m almost due for my yearly salon visit), I wash it twice a week, and I don’t even own any styling products or tools. The last time I used a brush or comb was sometime during the Reagan administration. I don’t even comb it after I wash it. It just doesn’t tangle, and it looks however it looks straight out of bed. Some days it’s mostly straight, and other days it’s quite wavy. I never do anything to it in Photoshop aside from the occasional colour change for fun. What you see in the above photo is 100% natural.
10. I don’t think I’d ever have elective cosmetic surgery, but if you held a gun to my head and forced me to have something done, I’d get my lips plumped. It’s kind of a strange thing to say, because every time I plump them up in Photoshop, I think it looks stupid and I undo it. But when I look in the mirror, I think I wouldn’t mind if they were just a little more… robust.
11. I find cooking soul-destroyingly boring, not to mention a gigantic hassle. I avoid it whenever possible.
12. I’m a winter girl all the way. I absolutely do not see the appeal of summer, unless you have a fetish for sweat or stinky people. Or unless you live in a place where the summers are reasonable, like England. I did love summer in England – it’s one of the things I really miss about living there.
13. I’ve lived a stone’s throw from the beach for almost five years, and I’ve been down there maybe twice. I’m more into swimming pools – sticky salt hair and a crack full of sand just isn’t my idea of a good time, sorry. I do like going to the beach to take pictures, though.
14. I have a raging sweet tooth that cannot be tamed. When I come to your country, the first thing I want to see is the array of desserts your people have to offer me. So far, Italy has been the most spectacular in this respect, though it should be mentioned that I have not yet visited India, where I understand they start by making normal desserts for mortals and then soak them in syrup. Win.
15. I’m not into politics whatsoever, but it’s nice that the Obama administration is the first government that hasn’t implied I’m a filthy un-American traitor for choosing to live somewhere else. In fact, Obama’s web site has a whole section devoted to Americans abroad, and I was shocked to discover that they weren’t just talking about soldiers or people who were sent away to work for American companies. They mean everyone abroad, including me.
16. That said, if I were forced to go "back where I came from," I’d more likely go back to Europe than the United States. I don’t feel that preference shows any indication of a diminished love for the US. I’m just enjoying living on this half of the planet, that’s all. I don’t have any hate for the other half.
2009.187
Posted by Melissa Maples on 2009-02-03 15:24:39
Tagged: , antalya , turkey , türkiye , asia , 安塔利亚 , 土耳其 , 亚洲 , nikon , d40 , ニコン , 尼康 , nikkor , af-s , 18-200mm , f/3.5-5.6g , 18-200mm f/3.5-5.6g , vr , 1:1 , square , me , melissa , maples , self-portrait , woman , brunette , brown , window , long hair , brown hair , cleavage
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Here’s How Jameela Jamil Helped Bring About Instagram’s New “Diet Policy”
The existence of detox teas and weight loss pills is nothing new but an open conversation about the dangers—both physically and mentally—of these kinds of products gained traction when Jameela Jamil began calling out influencers like the Kardashians for their blatant promotion of such products on their social media pages. The actress has been outspoken about how she herself fell prey to similar products as a teen and developed an eating disorder that took years to overcome. Earlier this year, the Good Place actress launched a Change.org petition to ‘Stop Celebrities Promoting Toxic Diet Products On Social Media’ and also started a dialogue with Instagram reps about the advertising on their platform, which eventually led to the implementation of their new “diet policy.”
There are plenty of studies that show the impact that diet, detox and cosmetic surgery content, as well as aspirational social media posts, can have on young people’s mental health and body image. Taking that into account, and after speaking with not just Jamil but experts like Dr Ysabel Gerrard, who specializes in body image and mental health, Instagram and Facebook formulated the policy change that was announced yesterday.
Under the new rules, “posts that promote the use of certain weight-loss products or cosmetic procedures, which have an incentive to buy or include a price, will be hidden from users known to be under 18.” In addition, any content that made a “miraculous” claim about a diet or weight-loss product and was linked to a commercial offer such as a discount code, would be removed from Instagram. According to Mashable, however, these posts will only be hidden or removed after users report them, “likely once plenty of susceptible users or minors have seen them.” It’s still a step in the right direction though. In a statement, Emma Collins, Instagram’s public policy manager said, “We want Instagram to be a positive place for everyone that uses it and this policy is part of our ongoing work to reduce the pressure that people can sometimes feel as a result of social media.”
“I’ve been working with Instagram all year towards this, who were amazing to deal with, and they expressed that they passionately care about creating a safer space for us all online,” Jamil posted on her own account.
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THIS IS HUGE NEWS. @i_weigh are changing the world together. After a bunch of shouting, screaming, and petitioning… we have managed to get the attention of the people at the top, and they have heard us and want to protect us. And this is just the beginning of our efforts. As of now, if you’re under 18, you will no longer be exposed to any diet/detox products, and for all other ages; all fad products that have bogus, unrealistic claims will be taken down and easy to report. I’ve been working with Instagram all year towards this, who were amazing to deal with, and they expressed that they passionately care about creating a safer space for us all online. This happened so much faster than I expected and I’m so proud and happy and relieved. WELL DONE to the many people who have been working towards this huge change. This is a mass effort. This is an extraordinary win that is going to make a big difference. Influencers have to be more responsible. ❤️
A post shared by Jameela Jamil (@jameelajamilofficial) on Sep 18, 2019 at 10:08am PDT
“This is a huge win for our ongoing fight against the diet/detox industry,” Jamil told The Guardian. The change will also affect the influencers who peddle the products this industry is built on, such as the Kardashians. When asked how the new diet policy will affect these celebrities, some of whom have hundreds of millions of followers on the platform, Collins said they will be informed of the new regulations.
“If [a Kardashian’s] Instagram post is pulled into the policy of promoting diet products or procedures for sale it will be removed. The Kardashians are people we continue to have collaborative conversations with, they’ll be made aware of the change.”
While Jamil has been criticized in the past for pushing a brand of “toxic feminism” and a self-righteous approach that fails to take into account her own immense privilege as an able-bodied, conventionally beautiful woman, the strides she’s made as a champion of body positivity cannot be denied. (Her social media account/movement I Weigh has amassed over 840,000 followers since it launched in March 2018 and created a global conversation.) With this latest move, her efforts have certainly paid off. And social media is the better for it.
The post Here’s How Jameela Jamil Helped Bring About Instagram’s New “Diet Policy” appeared first on FASHION Magazine.
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Exactly how To Select A Best Spine Specialist?
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{#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks.
A friend recently told me that when she was in high school, she went through a growth spurt and suddenly lost a lot of weight
Up until that point she had been, in her words, a “bit of a butterball” until she shot up 4 inches and dropped a few sizes.
My friend had spent most of her life up to that point wishing she could be as thin, airy, pretty, and cool as the popular kids. She had felt invisible, and assumed there must be something wrong with her that made her so unimpressive and unwanted.
Then she lost thirty pounds, and… suddenly… she became visible. The cool kids wanted to hang out with her, she got attention from boys, she was invited to parties, and she basically just got everything she had been dreaming of.
But instead of feeling amazing, my friend just felt angry.
Nothing about her had changed other than her weight, but suddenly everyone thought she was funny, and cool, and interesting. My friend described this transition as jarring and confusing, as if an invisibility cloak she hadn’t known she’d been wearing her whole life was suddenly yanked off. Now that she was thin and pretty, she was treated with kindness and respect.
This pissed her off.
To hear her tell it, up until this point, my friend had assumed that there was something wrong with her– her personality or core– that made people not like her. All the positive attention she got after losing weight made her realize those people only liked her because she was valuable to them once she became “hot.”
This solidified several beliefs in her mind that she would then spend the next fifteen years healing from:
Nobody will ever see you for who you are; the best you can hope for is to offer them something valuable in exchange for their attention.
People are only interested in your outsides, and don’t give a shit about your insides, so it’s really, really important to look perfect.
Just to recap, my sweet and hilarious friend was treated like she didn’t matter and held no value, because she was a plain and slightly chubby girl, so she assumed there was something deeply wrong with her that repelled people. But then when she went through a physical transformation and was suddenly treated like she had value, she felt even more isolated and invisible, because it felt like nobody would ever care about who she was inside.
Ugh.
This isn’t how we imagine it would feel to finally be “accepted.” This isn’t the joyful, easy, and confident life that we’re promised if we lose weight or finally look “good enough.”
By every marketing and social media account, my friend should have been basking in the glorious satisfaction of being pretty and popular; reveling in her new status as one of society’s “chosen ones.”
This is the promise made to us over and over by the weight loss industry, the beauty industry, the cosmetic surgery industry, and many more:
that by looking a certain way you will be admitted into the ranks of those People Who Belong.
You know what PWB look like. They’re thin, beautiful, young, white, and middle or upper class. We’re all fed the story that the closer we can get to looking like one of these people, the closer we will get to being one of them.
Being one is important, because People Who Belong are supposed to be happy! Their life is supposed to be easy, and fulfilling. They get their choice of partner, jobs, and opportunities. They are celebrated and praised, they have amazing sex, they are confident in themselves, and they feel wholly appreciated and loved!
This is a lie.
While not being fat in a fatphobic society certainly prevents you from facing certain discrimination and marginalization (much like being white prevents you from facing racism, and being male prevents you from facing sexism), the lack of obstacles doesn’t actually lead to happiness.
In fact, looking like a Person Who Belongs often doesn’t actually make you feel like you belong, and being valued and celebrated for how you look really doesn’t feel as good as we think it will.
This is a crucial fact to wrap your head around when it comes to healing your relationship to your body.
Many women spend a lifetime furious with their bodies for not looking “good enough” to grant them access to this elite People Who Belong club. They imagine being in the club would solve all their problems and make them happy and confident– and even more specifically, they imagine that they cannot be happy and confident withouthaving access to this club.
Where does this fantasy even come from? Why do we think that being thin and beautiful will suddenly make us happy and confident?
A big part of the answer is capitalism. Advertisers spend an enormous amount of time and money fueling the fantasy of the blissful lives of People Who Belong. It’s their job to convince us that with just a few purchases, we too can expereince the easy, happy confidence of people who have it all. And for women, “having it all” is about looking a certain way.
In my experience though, focusing on how you look actually makes you feel less happy and confident, and more likely to become obsessively critical of all your perceived “flaws,” no matter how small.
Instead of basking in the success and celebration of your new appearance as marketing promises, most people who lose weight just start nitpicking their bodies and trying to push themselves further. (This is one reason so many casual dieters end up developing eating disorders.)
In fact, in all my decade of experience working in the fitness industry, I never once heard someone hit their goal weight and say “this is exactly how I was hoping to feel!”
Never once has someone achieved a sustainable aesthetic goal and said “perfect, I’m done, this is good enough.”
Instead they say things like “maybe I should lose just 5 more pounds….” or “now I just want to tone up this one area” or “actually can we fix this other thing?”
That’s one reason I moved away from the fitness industry. Not only is looking like a Person Who Belongs in our culture impossible and unhealthy for most women, but even if you achieve it, it will not make you feel how you want to feel.
Luckily there’s good news.
You do not have to change the way you look, in order to change the way you feel.
You actually can feel the way you want to feel, in any body, at any size or shape, whether you are close to the beauty ideal or not.
That’s what Authentic Body Confidence, my twelve week online group coaching program, teaches you to do– to let go of the fantasy that your appearance is the key to being happy and confident, and to find that happiness and confidence in the body you live in now.
Don’t spend you life waiting for access to a club that doesn’t exist.
You deserve so much better than that.
<3
Jessi
The post {#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks. appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.
https://ift.tt/2vMefyr
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{#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks.
A friend recently told me that when she was in high school, she went through a growth spurt and suddenly lost a lot of weight
Up until that point she had been, in her words, a “bit of a butterball” until she shot up 4 inches and dropped a few sizes.
My friend had spent most of her life up to that point wishing she could be as thin, airy, pretty, and cool as the popular kids. She had felt invisible, and assumed there must be something wrong with her that made her so unimpressive and unwanted.
Then she lost thirty pounds, and… suddenly… she became visible. The cool kids wanted to hang out with her, she got attention from boys, she was invited to parties, and she basically just got everything she had been dreaming of.
But instead of feeling amazing, my friend just felt angry.
Nothing about her had changed other than her weight, but suddenly everyone thought she was funny, and cool, and interesting. My friend described this transition as jarring and confusing, as if an invisibility cloak she hadn’t known she’d been wearing her whole life was suddenly yanked off. Now that she was thin and pretty, she was treated with kindness and respect.
This pissed her off.
To hear her tell it, up until this point, my friend had assumed that there was something wrong with her– her personality or core– that made people not like her. All the positive attention she got after losing weight made her realize those people only liked her because she was valuable to them once she became “hot.”
This solidified several beliefs in her mind that she would then spend the next fifteen years healing from:
Nobody will ever see you for who you are; the best you can hope for is to offer them something valuable in exchange for their attention.
People are only interested in your outsides, and don’t give a shit about your insides, so it’s really, really important to look perfect.
Just to recap, my sweet and hilarious friend was treated like she didn’t matter and held no value, because she was a plain and slightly chubby girl, so she assumed there was something deeply wrong with her that repelled people. But then when she went through a physical transformation and was suddenly treated like she had value, she felt even more isolated and invisible, because it felt like nobody would ever care about who she was inside.
Ugh.
This isn’t how we imagine it would feel to finally be “accepted.” This isn’t the joyful, easy, and confident life that we’re promised if we lose weight or finally look “good enough.”
By every marketing and social media account, my friend should have been basking in the glorious satisfaction of being pretty and popular; reveling in her new status as one of society’s “chosen ones.”
This is the promise made to us over and over by the weight loss industry, the beauty industry, the cosmetic surgery industry, and many more:
that by looking a certain way you will be admitted into the ranks of those People Who Belong.
You know what PWB look like. They’re thin, beautiful, young, white, and middle or upper class. We’re all fed the story that the closer we can get to looking like one of these people, the closer we will get to being one of them.
Being one is important, because People Who Belong are supposed to be happy! Their life is supposed to be easy, and fulfilling. They get their choice of partner, jobs, and opportunities. They are celebrated and praised, they have amazing sex, they are confident in themselves, and they feel wholly appreciated and loved!
This is a lie.
While not being fat in a fatphobic society certainly prevents you from facing certain discrimination and marginalization (much like being white prevents you from facing racism, and being male prevents you from facing sexism), the lack of obstacles doesn’t actually lead to happiness.
In fact, looking like a Person Who Belongs often doesn’t actually make you feel like you belong, and being valued and celebrated for how you look really doesn’t feel as good as we think it will.
This is a crucial fact to wrap your head around when it comes to healing your relationship to your body.
Many women spend a lifetime furious with their bodies for not looking “good enough” to grant them access to this elite People Who Belong club. They imagine being in the club would solve all their problems and make them happy and confident– and even more specifically, they imagine that they cannot be happy and confident withouthaving access to this club.
Where does this fantasy even come from? Why do we think that being thin and beautiful will suddenly make us happy and confident?
A big part of the answer is capitalism. Advertisers spend an enormous amount of time and money fueling the fantasy of the blissful lives of People Who Belong. It’s their job to convince us that with just a few purchases, we too can expereince the easy, happy confidence of people who have it all. And for women, “having it all” is about looking a certain way.
In my experience though, focusing on how you look actually makes you feel less happy and confident, and more likely to become obsessively critical of all your perceived “flaws,” no matter how small.
Instead of basking in the success and celebration of your new appearance as marketing promises, most people who lose weight just start nitpicking their bodies and trying to push themselves further. (This is one reason so many casual dieters end up developing eating disorders.)
In fact, in all my decade of experience working in the fitness industry, I never once heard someone hit their goal weight and say “this is exactly how I was hoping to feel!”
Never once has someone achieved a sustainable aesthetic goal and said “perfect, I’m done, this is good enough.”
Instead they say things like “maybe I should lose just 5 more pounds….” or “now I just want to tone up this one area” or “actually can we fix this other thing?”
That’s one reason I moved away from the fitness industry. Not only is looking like a Person Who Belongs in our culture impossible and unhealthy for most women, but even if you achieve it, it will not make you feel how you want to feel.
Luckily there’s good news.
You do not have to change the way you look, in order to change the way you feel.
You actually can feel the way you want to feel, in any body, at any size or shape, whether you are close to the beauty ideal or not.
That’s what Authentic Body Confidence, my twelve week online group coaching program, teaches you to do– to let go of the fantasy that your appearance is the key to being happy and confident, and to find that happiness and confidence in the body you live in now.
Don’t spend you life waiting for access to a club that doesn’t exist.
You deserve so much better than that.
<3
Jessi
The post {#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks. appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.
https://ift.tt/2vMefyr
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Text
{#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks.
A friend recently told me that when she was in high school, she went through a growth spurt and suddenly lost a lot of weight
Up until that point she had been, in her words, a “bit of a butterball” until she shot up 4 inches and dropped a few sizes.
My friend had spent most of her life up to that point wishing she could be as thin, airy, pretty, and cool as the popular kids. She had felt invisible, and assumed there must be something wrong with her that made her so unimpressive and unwanted.
Then she lost thirty pounds, and… suddenly… she became visible. The cool kids wanted to hang out with her, she got attention from boys, she was invited to parties, and she basically just got everything she had been dreaming of.
But instead of feeling amazing, my friend just felt angry.
Nothing about her had changed other than her weight, but suddenly everyone thought she was funny, and cool, and interesting. My friend described this transition as jarring and confusing, as if an invisibility cloak she hadn’t known she’d been wearing her whole life was suddenly yanked off. Now that she was thin and pretty, she was treated with kindness and respect.
This pissed her off.
To hear her tell it, up until this point, my friend had assumed that there was something wrong with her– her personality or core– that made people not like her. All the positive attention she got after losing weight made her realize those people only liked her because she was valuable to them once she became “hot.”
This solidified several beliefs in her mind that she would then spend the next fifteen years healing from:
Nobody will ever see you for who you are; the best you can hope for is to offer them something valuable in exchange for their attention.
People are only interested in your outsides, and don’t give a shit about your insides, so it’s really, really important to look perfect.
Just to recap, my sweet and hilarious friend was treated like she didn’t matter and held no value, because she was a plain and slightly chubby girl, so she assumed there was something deeply wrong with her that repelled people. But then when she went through a physical transformation and was suddenly treated like she had value, she felt even more isolated and invisible, because it felt like nobody would ever care about who she was inside.
Ugh.
This isn’t how we imagine it would feel to finally be “accepted.” This isn’t the joyful, easy, and confident life that we’re promised if we lose weight or finally look “good enough.”
By every marketing and social media account, my friend should have been basking in the glorious satisfaction of being pretty and popular; reveling in her new status as one of society’s “chosen ones.”
This is the promise made to us over and over by the weight loss industry, the beauty industry, the cosmetic surgery industry, and many more:
that by looking a certain way you will be admitted into the ranks of those People Who Belong.
You know what PWB look like. They’re thin, beautiful, young, white, and middle or upper class. We’re all fed the story that the closer we can get to looking like one of these people, the closer we will get to being one of them.
Being one is important, because People Who Belong are supposed to be happy! Their life is supposed to be easy, and fulfilling. They get their choice of partner, jobs, and opportunities. They are celebrated and praised, they have amazing sex, they are confident in themselves, and they feel wholly appreciated and loved!
This is a lie.
While not being fat in a fatphobic society certainly prevents you from facing certain discrimination and marginalization (much like being white prevents you from facing racism, and being male prevents you from facing sexism), the lack of obstacles doesn’t actually lead to happiness.
In fact, looking like a Person Who Belongs often doesn’t actually make you feel like you belong, and being valued and celebrated for how you look really doesn’t feel as good as we think it will.
This is a crucial fact to wrap your head around when it comes to healing your relationship to your body.
Many women spend a lifetime furious with their bodies for not looking “good enough” to grant them access to this elite People Who Belong club. They imagine being in the club would solve all their problems and make them happy and confident– and even more specifically, they imagine that they cannot be happy and confident withouthaving access to this club.
Where does this fantasy even come from? Why do we think that being thin and beautiful will suddenly make us happy and confident?
A big part of the answer is capitalism. Advertisers spend an enormous amount of time and money fueling the fantasy of the blissful lives of People Who Belong. It’s their job to convince us that with just a few purchases, we too can expereince the easy, happy confidence of people who have it all. And for women, “having it all” is about looking a certain way.
In my experience though, focusing on how you look actually makes you feel less happy and confident, and more likely to become obsessively critical of all your perceived “flaws,” no matter how small.
Instead of basking in the success and celebration of your new appearance as marketing promises, most people who lose weight just start nitpicking their bodies and trying to push themselves further. (This is one reason so many casual dieters end up developing eating disorders.)
In fact, in all my decade of experience working in the fitness industry, I never once heard someone hit their goal weight and say “this is exactly how I was hoping to feel!”
Never once has someone achieved a sustainable aesthetic goal and said “perfect, I’m done, this is good enough.”
Instead they say things like “maybe I should lose just 5 more pounds….” or “now I just want to tone up this one area” or “actually can we fix this other thing?”
That’s one reason I moved away from the fitness industry. Not only is looking like a Person Who Belongs in our culture impossible and unhealthy for most women, but even if you achieve it, it will not make you feel how you want to feel.
Luckily there’s good news.
You do not have to change the way you look, in order to change the way you feel.
You actually can feel the way you want to feel, in any body, at any size or shape, whether you are close to the beauty ideal or not.
That’s what Authentic Body Confidence, my twelve week online group coaching program, teaches you to do– to let go of the fantasy that your appearance is the key to being happy and confident, and to find that happiness and confidence in the body you live in now.
Don’t spend you life waiting for access to a club that doesn’t exist.
You deserve so much better than that.
<3
Jessi
The post {#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks. appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.
https://ift.tt/2vMefyr
0 notes
Text
{#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks.
A friend recently told me that when she was in high school, she went through a growth spurt and suddenly lost a lot of weight
Up until that point she had been, in her words, a “bit of a butterball” until she shot up 4 inches and dropped a few sizes.
My friend had spent most of her life up to that point wishing she could be as thin, airy, pretty, and cool as the popular kids. She had felt invisible, and assumed there must be something wrong with her that made her so unimpressive and unwanted.
Then she lost thirty pounds, and… suddenly… she became visible. The cool kids wanted to hang out with her, she got attention from boys, she was invited to parties, and she basically just got everything she had been dreaming of.
But instead of feeling amazing, my friend just felt angry.
Nothing about her had changed other than her weight, but suddenly everyone thought she was funny, and cool, and interesting. My friend described this transition as jarring and confusing, as if an invisibility cloak she hadn’t known she’d been wearing her whole life was suddenly yanked off. Now that she was thin and pretty, she was treated with kindness and respect.
This pissed her off.
To hear her tell it, up until this point, my friend had assumed that there was something wrong with her– her personality or core– that made people not like her. All the positive attention she got after losing weight made her realize those people only liked her because she was valuable to them once she became “hot.”
This solidified several beliefs in her mind that she would then spend the next fifteen years healing from:
Nobody will ever see you for who you are; the best you can hope for is to offer them something valuable in exchange for their attention.
People are only interested in your outsides, and don’t give a shit about your insides, so it’s really, really important to look perfect.
Just to recap, my sweet and hilarious friend was treated like she didn’t matter and held no value, because she was a plain and slightly chubby girl, so she assumed there was something deeply wrong with her that repelled people. But then when she went through a physical transformation and was suddenly treated like she had value, she felt even more isolated and invisible, because it felt like nobody would ever care about who she was inside.
Ugh.
This isn’t how we imagine it would feel to finally be “accepted.” This isn’t the joyful, easy, and confident life that we’re promised if we lose weight or finally look “good enough.”
By every marketing and social media account, my friend should have been basking in the glorious satisfaction of being pretty and popular; reveling in her new status as one of society’s “chosen ones.”
This is the promise made to us over and over by the weight loss industry, the beauty industry, the cosmetic surgery industry, and many more:
that by looking a certain way you will be admitted into the ranks of those People Who Belong.
You know what PWB look like. They’re thin, beautiful, young, white, and middle or upper class. We’re all fed the story that the closer we can get to looking like one of these people, the closer we will get to being one of them.
Being one is important, because People Who Belong are supposed to be happy! Their life is supposed to be easy, and fulfilling. They get their choice of partner, jobs, and opportunities. They are celebrated and praised, they have amazing sex, they are confident in themselves, and they feel wholly appreciated and loved!
This is a lie.
While not being fat in a fatphobic society certainly prevents you from facing certain discrimination and marginalization (much like being white prevents you from facing racism, and being male prevents you from facing sexism), the lack of obstacles doesn’t actually lead to happiness.
In fact, looking like a Person Who Belongs often doesn’t actually make you feel like you belong, and being valued and celebrated for how you look really doesn’t feel as good as we think it will.
This is a crucial fact to wrap your head around when it comes to healing your relationship to your body.
Many women spend a lifetime furious with their bodies for not looking “good enough” to grant them access to this elite People Who Belong club. They imagine being in the club would solve all their problems and make them happy and confident– and even more specifically, they imagine that they cannot be happy and confident withouthaving access to this club.
Where does this fantasy even come from? Why do we think that being thin and beautiful will suddenly make us happy and confident?
A big part of the answer is capitalism. Advertisers spend an enormous amount of time and money fueling the fantasy of the blissful lives of People Who Belong. It’s their job to convince us that with just a few purchases, we too can expereince the easy, happy confidence of people who have it all. And for women, “having it all” is about looking a certain way.
In my experience though, focusing on how you look actually makes you feel less happy and confident, and more likely to become obsessively critical of all your perceived “flaws,” no matter how small.
Instead of basking in the success and celebration of your new appearance as marketing promises, most people who lose weight just start nitpicking their bodies and trying to push themselves further. (This is one reason so many casual dieters end up developing eating disorders.)
In fact, in all my decade of experience working in the fitness industry, I never once heard someone hit their goal weight and say “this is exactly how I was hoping to feel!”
Never once has someone achieved a sustainable aesthetic goal and said “perfect, I’m done, this is good enough.”
Instead they say things like “maybe I should lose just 5 more pounds….” or “now I just want to tone up this one area” or “actually can we fix this other thing?”
That’s one reason I moved away from the fitness industry. Not only is looking like a Person Who Belongs in our culture impossible and unhealthy for most women, but even if you achieve it, it will not make you feel how you want to feel.
Luckily there’s good news.
You do not have to change the way you look, in order to change the way you feel.
You actually can feel the way you want to feel, in any body, at any size or shape, whether you are close to the beauty ideal or not.
That’s what Authentic Body Confidence, my twelve week online group coaching program, teaches you to do– to let go of the fantasy that your appearance is the key to being happy and confident, and to find that happiness and confidence in the body you live in now.
Don’t spend you life waiting for access to a club that doesn’t exist.
You deserve so much better than that.
<3
Jessi
The post {#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks. appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.
https://ift.tt/2vMefyr
0 notes
Text
{#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks.
A friend recently told me that when she was in high school, she went through a growth spurt and suddenly lost a lot of weight
Up until that point she had been, in her words, a “bit of a butterball” until she shot up 4 inches and dropped a few sizes.
My friend had spent most of her life up to that point wishing she could be as thin, airy, pretty, and cool as the popular kids. She had felt invisible, and assumed there must be something wrong with her that made her so unimpressive and unwanted.
Then she lost thirty pounds, and… suddenly… she became visible. The cool kids wanted to hang out with her, she got attention from boys, she was invited to parties, and she basically just got everything she had been dreaming of.
But instead of feeling amazing, my friend just felt angry.
Nothing about her had changed other than her weight, but suddenly everyone thought she was funny, and cool, and interesting. My friend described this transition as jarring and confusing, as if an invisibility cloak she hadn’t known she’d been wearing her whole life was suddenly yanked off. Now that she was thin and pretty, she was treated with kindness and respect.
This pissed her off.
To hear her tell it, up until this point, my friend had assumed that there was something wrong with her– her personality or core– that made people not like her. All the positive attention she got after losing weight made her realize those people only liked her because she was valuable to them once she became “hot.”
This solidified several beliefs in her mind that she would then spend the next fifteen years healing from:
Nobody will ever see you for who you are; the best you can hope for is to offer them something valuable in exchange for their attention.
People are only interested in your outsides, and don’t give a shit about your insides, so it’s really, really important to look perfect.
Just to recap, my sweet and hilarious friend was treated like she didn’t matter and held no value, because she was a plain and slightly chubby girl, so she assumed there was something deeply wrong with her that repelled people. But then when she went through a physical transformation and was suddenly treated like she had value, she felt even more isolated and invisible, because it felt like nobody would ever care about who she was inside.
Ugh.
This isn’t how we imagine it would feel to finally be “accepted.” This isn’t the joyful, easy, and confident life that we’re promised if we lose weight or finally look “good enough.”
By every marketing and social media account, my friend should have been basking in the glorious satisfaction of being pretty and popular; reveling in her new status as one of society’s “chosen ones.”
This is the promise made to us over and over by the weight loss industry, the beauty industry, the cosmetic surgery industry, and many more:
that by looking a certain way you will be admitted into the ranks of those People Who Belong.
You know what PWB look like. They’re thin, beautiful, young, white, and middle or upper class. We’re all fed the story that the closer we can get to looking like one of these people, the closer we will get to being one of them.
Being one is important, because People Who Belong are supposed to be happy! Their life is supposed to be easy, and fulfilling. They get their choice of partner, jobs, and opportunities. They are celebrated and praised, they have amazing sex, they are confident in themselves, and they feel wholly appreciated and loved!
This is a lie.
While not being fat in a fatphobic society certainly prevents you from facing certain discrimination and marginalization (much like being white prevents you from facing racism, and being male prevents you from facing sexism), the lack of obstacles doesn’t actually lead to happiness.
In fact, looking like a Person Who Belongs often doesn’t actually make you feel like you belong, and being valued and celebrated for how you look really doesn’t feel as good as we think it will.
This is a crucial fact to wrap your head around when it comes to healing your relationship to your body.
Many women spend a lifetime furious with their bodies for not looking “good enough” to grant them access to this elite People Who Belong club. They imagine being in the club would solve all their problems and make them happy and confident– and even more specifically, they imagine that they cannot be happy and confident withouthaving access to this club.
Where does this fantasy even come from? Why do we think that being thin and beautiful will suddenly make us happy and confident?
A big part of the answer is capitalism. Advertisers spend an enormous amount of time and money fueling the fantasy of the blissful lives of People Who Belong. It’s their job to convince us that with just a few purchases, we too can expereince the easy, happy confidence of people who have it all. And for women, “having it all” is about looking a certain way.
In my experience though, focusing on how you look actually makes you feel less happy and confident, and more likely to become obsessively critical of all your perceived “flaws,” no matter how small.
Instead of basking in the success and celebration of your new appearance as marketing promises, most people who lose weight just start nitpicking their bodies and trying to push themselves further. (This is one reason so many casual dieters end up developing eating disorders.)
In fact, in all my decade of experience working in the fitness industry, I never once heard someone hit their goal weight and say “this is exactly how I was hoping to feel!”
Never once has someone achieved a sustainable aesthetic goal and said “perfect, I’m done, this is good enough.”
Instead they say things like “maybe I should lose just 5 more pounds….” or “now I just want to tone up this one area” or “actually can we fix this other thing?”
That’s one reason I moved away from the fitness industry. Not only is looking like a Person Who Belongs in our culture impossible and unhealthy for most women, but even if you achieve it, it will not make you feel how you want to feel.
Luckily there’s good news.
You do not have to change the way you look, in order to change the way you feel.
You actually can feel the way you want to feel, in any body, at any size or shape, whether you are close to the beauty ideal or not.
That’s what Authentic Body Confidence, my twelve week online group coaching program, teaches you to do– to let go of the fantasy that your appearance is the key to being happy and confident, and to find that happiness and confidence in the body you live in now.
Don’t spend you life waiting for access to a club that doesn’t exist.
You deserve so much better than that.
<3
Jessi
The post {#TransparentTuesday} This Club Sucks. appeared first on Jessi Kneeland.
https://ift.tt/2vMefyr
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Photo
“Are Models Being Cast too Young?” Fall 2017 volume 6 issue 1 of The Avenue. Full article text below:
“ The modeling industry has consistently been criticized for its unhealthy and inappropriate corporate culture. Although the working environment has improved significantly over recent years due to the increased acceptance of models of all sizes, there are still enormous pressures plaguing the majority of the field to be unrealistically “beautiful” and slim. Researchers from Northeastern University, Harvard University and the Model Alliance found in a 2016 study that over 62% of models polled had been told by someone in the industry to lose weight or change their size; about 54% were told that there would not be any more job opportunities if they did not. Along with this intense obsession with thinness often comes a dangerous drug culture and sometimes even pressures for cosmetic surgery. This toxic coercion is a lot for adult models to handle, let alone vulnerable underage models.
Since the very advent of supermodel culture, however, there has been an alarming trend in the industry of casting girls aged 16 or under for various adult-oriented campaigns. John Casablancas, founder of the legendary Elite Models in 1977, signed Naomi Campbell, Linda Evangelista and Cindy Crawford when they were only 15 to 16 years old. Another model who has become a household name, Kate Moss, was cast by Storm Model Management at the age of 14, and has since spoken out about how uncomfortable and inappropriate some of the shoots she was forced into were. In a 2012 Vanity Fair interview, Moss describes how Corinne Day had told her to take her clothes off at age 16 during her iconic shoot for The Face, and how they told her “if you don’t do it, we’re not going to book you again.” She attributes her clinical anxiety for years afterwards mainly to shoots like this. And let’s not forget the scandal involving late British photographer David Hamilton, who rose to fame through his work involving girls as young as 13 participating in shoots that verged on pornographic. Shortly before his death, he was accused of rape by one of his past models, who would have been 13 at the time.
Multiple luxury fashion giants have participated in this underage model trend as well, most notably Marc Jacobs, Prada (Miu Miu), and Dior. Miu Miu’s sweethearts, Hailee Steinfeld and Lindsey Wixson, were cast at ages 14 and 15, respectively. Dior cast 14-year-old Sofia Mechetner as the face of their runway show in July of 2015. Often these models are not only minors but also immigrants who may not be granted the same protections as Americans or Brits.
Current celebrity and social media culture certainly does not help. Minors look to celebrities and social influencers who have thousands of likes and millions of followers and want to be like them. As a result, young people have been increasingly changing their makeup, clothing and behavior to appear much older than they are. Male YouTubers have racked up millions of views by participating in the “Guess Her Age” challenge, where they take pictures from young girls’ social media and try to pinpoint how old each one is. Since girls have been presenting themselves as older and older, many of the guesses regarding their ages are incorrect. Female minors are rewarded for this behavior with likes, comments and other forms of attention -- oftentimes inappropriate attention -- which gives them a reason to continue the trend and causes them insecurities surrounding their immaturity. Nancy Jo Sales supports this statement by sharing information she found in the process of writing her book, American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Life of Teenagers. In a 2016 Time Magazine article, Sales describes how she traveled to ten different states and interviewed over 200 young girls; her research indicates that the rise of selfie culture has led to increased competition and sexualization, since “validation is only a tap away. And one of the easiest ways to get validation is by looking hot. Sex sells, whether you’re 13 or 35.” Not only is this obsession with looking mature detrimental to self-esteem, it also shortens girls’ innocence, takes away much of what should be a carefree period of their life and exposes them to cyberbullying and an eager audience of online predators.
This is where the paradox lies: Underage models are continually being cast to wear products intended for older audiences, but when young girls see these models they want to appear older like them. The use of minors as models is therefore unhealthy for two groups, the first being the children who see these advertisements and fashion shows and want to look as though they have a higher level of maturity -- one they may not be able to handle. The second group harmed are the underage models themselves because they are subject to a stressful, self-esteem-crushing and unhealthy work environment.
Why does the adult global fashion industry have such a preoccupation with extreme youth? What can be done to prevent such damaging and dangerous practices going forward? Thankfully, some changes are already being made. In 2013, legislation was passed in New York State that declared underage models the same rights as underage actors and actresses, including rights to breaks and limited work time. At the beginning of September 2017, Kering and LVMH announced they are creating a new charter that prohibits them from casting models who are under 16 and/or smaller than a U.S. size 2. Additionally, the charter protects the 16-18 year-old age bracket with work time restrictions and parental supervision. Combined, Kering and LVMH own Gucci, Alexander McQueen, Yves Saint Laurent, Balenciaga, Stella McCartney, Louis Vuitton, Christian Dior, Celine, Marc Jacobs, Givenchy, Kenzo and Fendi, among others.
It is a little too soon to be sure that these corporations will follow through. Vogue made a similar promise in 2012 and broke it in the same year by casting 14 and 15 year-old models for their magazines. The situation remains hopeful, though, and the industry seems to be coming to its senses regarding the various harmful effects that result from using child models.”
#text#editorial#writing#the avenue#Northeastern Unviersity#are models being cast too young#modeling#fashion#fall 2017#magazine#fall#2017#Northeastern University
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The Best Hair Transplant Clinics
While تجميل الأنف trying your self in a mirror and see just a few adjustments in your body like zits, fatness, stretch marks which appeared attributable to pregnancy or weight gain. It decreases the boldness of an individual on an incredible extent. That's the motivation behind why many beauty clinic started utilizing newest know-how with a selected objective to revive & rejuvenate the wonder that everybody wants. So, it's important to search for a well-liked and reliable beauty clinic which can give one of the best تجميل الأنف طبيعيا results.
Searching for the very best beauty clinic is admittedly tough and complicated for individuals who don't have any previous knowledge about this field. It is additionally fairly widespread for many individuals to turn out to be nervous and find surgery fairly scary. That's the reason, it is ideally suited to seek for a specialist who's qualified and authorised in this field.
Let's focus on a couple of tips which can help find the best beauty clinic.
? Skilled Beauty Surgeon's Clinic
With the help of the online and media promoting, you'll be able to simply verify and examine the cosmetic surgical procedures provided by varied beauty clinics. At the level when searching for an achieved specialist, to begin with, check the identify of the cosmetic surgeon and his accomplishments within the subject of cosmetic surgical procedure.
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There are a couple of beauty clinic that supply distinctive companies. It's critical to check the website of the clinic for more details. Some clinics would possibly even hide the put up impact of some surgeries. Due to this fact, it is extremely advisable that it is best to get extra element not solely about the surgery, but additionally the clinic you might have chosen to get that surgical procedure.
? Technology Used & Degree Of Cleanliness At The Cosmetic Clinic
Before making an appointment, do not hesitate to examine around and go to each clinic you have shortlisted. Test if the instruments, tools and machines are sanitized properly. Since last decade, there has been nice development in the medical industry and that's why many of the surgeries are http://tajmeelworld.com carried out with the assistance of latest machines. For example, when you're planning to get pores and skin treatment, then be sure that all the equipment used is clear and recent. Guantee that the syringes are new and the chemical substances used should not extremely harsh in your skin.
? Check The Price Of The Surgical procedure
While exploring, take into consideration the cost of every surgical treatment and be taught more about how it's accomplished. The price of the remedy largely relies on type, instruments, supplies used, duration and the depth of the surgery.
? Take Recommendation From Associates & Learn Opinions
You need to be very cautious and sceptic while selecting a cosmetic clinic to your remedy. Repeatedly look for advice from family members and buddies you trust or from someone who had expertise with any cosmetic surgical procedure just lately. Search opinions and testimonials of different patients.
? Don't Fall Into Any Traps
Bear in mind, a botched cosmetic surgery would possibly make you look uglier. So, you want to be extra cautious while selecting any beauty clinic in your surgery.
Interestingly, in the event you do a fast search on the Web for best beauty products, you'll wind up going over a number of lists of manufacturers really useful by Physician So-and-So and Hollywood Star So-and-So. When you like private endorsements, you may go for his or her ideas, but the following are common rules that you may do properly to remember in making your choice:
1. Media ads are usually false shows. That is obviously as a result of it is the job of entrepreneurs to indicate off ladies with glowing tooth or shiny hair or easy pores and skin, maybe after spending hours getting made up on the set. What commercials do is simply to enhance sales for the product by presenting it in the best possible way. read more on wikipedia here This makes advertising a poor gauge of deciding which product to purchase. Should you choose which actresses' pores and skin appears to be like finest based on the advertisements? Instead, use the advertisements as a basis to check which companies you must look additional into. That is partly as a result of companies that spend rather a lot on promoting will most certainly be a big producer, since smaller corporations are usually extra limited in their media spending.
2. Your private beautician continues to be one of the best particular person to ask. It is because everybody's skin is exclusive, and your personal beautician will be more accustomed to your skin and will know what to suggest for you. In addition, beauty parlors usually have the inside track on how sure products carry out based on their experience with clients, so your beautician can ward you off from rip-offs. Of course, just make it possible for the parlor you frequent will not be an official endorser of a selected line, or else you may be limited to suggestions in that product line. Then once more, who knows? So long as that model certainly works, you most likely wouldn't mind in any respect.
three. If you have plenty of time, you can test product critiques on the Internet. Be aware of the condition, that when you've got numerous additional time. It is because the Net is overflowing with these opinions and chances are you'll wind up overwhelmed with all the knowledge. Alternatively, you can check the Internet solely after you've gotten a list of recommendations from the wonder parlor, as this narrows down your analysis into a manageable burden.
four. Lastly, if you realize your self to have allergy symptoms to some chemical compounds, it could be finest to seek the advice of a physician earlier than you spend money on massive pots of recent magnificence products. In fact, you possibly can go the normal route of merely doing trial and error, as recommended by pores and skin specialists: you simply put a small dab of the product on a portion of your hand and leave it for a while to test for allergic reactions, but you too can get a pores and skin take a look at completed on the native clinic.
Finding an effective magnificence anti growing older product on today's market can be a actual pain, but happily all it takes is a bit self-education to study what to search for. Tajmeel World The natural anti ageing skincare market has especially been booming the latest years and for apparent causes - persons are now not satisfied with the ineffective artificial products on the market.
1. Utterly Natural
Common beauty anti getting old merchandise typically contain chemical compounds that will hurt your pores and skin in the long term. Fully pure merchandise on the other hand are safe and useful for the pores and skin.
Your skin can absorb anything you apply to it, especially energetic ingredients in skin lotions. If the toxic chemical compounds discovered in many anti aging lotions get into the skin they'll ultimately get into your blood stream and organs, and have opposed health effects.
2. Targeting the Causes of Getting older
The ingredients of the very best magnificence anti growing older product target the three principal causes of getting older. This may occasionally sound complex however it is really fairly easy as soon as you have realized about it. Listed below are the principle causes of skin getting old:
- Decreased progress of collagen and elastin, this causes wrinkles and contours.
Look a product with ingredients which might be scientifically confirmed to target those causes. Examples are Cynergy TK - which stimulates an increased Tajmeel World أفضل عيادات زراعة الشعر في الرياض growth of collagen and elastin, Phytessence Wakame - which boosts the levels of hyaluronic acid, and Coenzyme Q10 - which gets rid of free radicals.
three. A Good Firm
Having an organization you may belief is likely one of the most important issues, as a result of many firms on the market are solely within the business for quick income. Look for a company that is also the developer and producer of the merchandise they're promoting, this fashion they have control over the entire course of and may make sure that only the very best elements are included.
Have you ever considered the value of training staff within the artwork of giving GREAT service?
The largest complaint I hear from disgruntled clinic/spa homeowners is that simply after offering comprehensive service and ongoing technical training to group members, they up and leave taking all that data with them for the good thing about the subsequent place they work! Sadly, there are too many homeowners with this mindset of shortage round training.
Looking at the concern, we first must acknowledge that this might be an issue, sure, coaching someone to carry out at their finest for your small business and having them up and go away could be soul destroying if you're looking at it from a sufferer perspective. Training shouldn't be the only answer to a profitable business;
nevertheless it's a crucial cog in the wheel. It must be included as a part of what you offer as a 'balanced workforce focused' business, and in right this moment's clinic world we should very positively be a folks (staff) targeted business.
It was Mary Kay Ash that stated "People are definitely a company's biggest asset. It does not make any difference whether or not the product is cars or cosmetics. A company is only as good because the folks it retains."
So here are 5 tremendous causes to offer common training to your staff:
1 Productiveness: 'is a measure relating a quantity or high quality of output to the inputs required to produce it'. Productiveness training ought to assist the workforce work extra successfully thus helping the clinic to realize its long run objectives.
2 Culture: 'is a shared, discovered, symbolic system of values, beliefs and attitudes that shapes and influences notion and behavior'. Training helps develop a culture of learning throughout the clinic, one in every of my favourite quotes is 'knowledge breeds confidence and confidence creates sales'.
3 Quality: 'Quality is a measure of excellence; high quality defines fascinating characteristics of a product, a process, or a service'. The group will worth the added quality they can provide to their shoppers, and purchasers will love the added high quality they receive from nicely trained, nicely informed team members.
4 Image: 'the general impression that something (a person or organization or product) presents to the general public'. helpful site Ongoing Coaching and Improvement helps in creating a greater more professional clinic (and industry) picture.
5 Profitability: 'the ability of a agency to generate net income on a consistent basis.' Coaching results in improved profitability and more optimistic healthy attitudes in direction of the relationship between educating clients and profitability for the clinic.
After all there are lots of additional advantages of group training together with the development of leadership skills, larger motivation, loyalty (sure it does occur) and better, more healthy attitudes amongst your workforce.
Look to your suppliers for specific product training and most of those organisations have some great concepts on the artwork of selling, some even have packages that will help you with this. افضل عيادات تجميل بجدة Take into account looking at what different organisations are out there for gross sales coaching, the chamber of commerce is a good useful resource for this, also take a look at corporations specialising in service coaching programs, and lastly do not discount trade particular specialists as sources of inspiration, these people are usually experienced in the Magnificence Industry and are greater than willing to share their knowledge with you and your staff.
Raising the information of you and your team relating to service is a step in the direction of raising the knowledge of the trade as a complete. The last few years of expertise has considerably 'dehumanised' the shopping for experience of your purchasers and your group (particularly younger members) have تجميل الشفايف الكبيرة rarely been on the receiving end of nice service, thus have not experienced the nice and cozy feelings that great service can deliver. The clinics that recognise the value of pleasing the client and embrace this into the future would be the ones to reap the rewards that nice service can convey.
Just a quick notice on technical training, take into consideration this; better educated therapists means better educated purchasers, and clients lately which can be better educated are more inclined to spend their money figuring out precisely what they're spending it on.
Let's face it, with the provision of the internet with its plethora of beauty advice and knowledge, you higher be up with the play or your shoppers may find yourself being better educated than you!
Oh and one last thought... Whilst understanding the actual worry of clinic house owners of when they prepare their staff in giving NICE have a peek at this blog service they then depart, Please Contemplate the implication to your Clients and enterprise of NOT training them they usually stay!
Things to know before choosing to have Botox injections are facts that will better put together a person for the necessities and outcome of this medical endeavor. A Botox injection clinic will probably be the place the procedure will be carried out and may only be executed by a professional individual that has expertise and has been researched thoroughly. Beauty clinics should be chosen very fastidiously.
A health care provider that is ready to administer injections is not going to only be a licensed doctor, but will probably be board certified by The American Board Of Plastic Surgery. تجميل الأنف في تركيا These are the only surgeons in clinic which are uniquely versed in performing any surgical procedure having to do with the face or another location on the physique. This also ensures that the physician has expertise and continues to be approved by the board to proceed being educated in beauty surgery schooling.
When looking for to have an elective medical procedure such as this, it is very important meet with a professional to be evaluated before hand and to have a chance to ask questions. Medical history is reviewed and time is taken أفضل عيادة تجميل في جدة to thoroughly explain the info regarding Botox injections. Included info should cowl advantages, risks, alternate options and reasoning for the proposed procedure. This is followed by the patient signing a consent kind.
Botox is a therapeutic agent that was originally used for the therapy for eye spasms and misalignment of the eye, but is also FDA permitted to quickly improve high-quality traces and wrinkles زراعة الشعر في السعودية جدة on the face. It's a good preventative measure to absorb the occasion of early indicators of getting old. It can be helpful to prevent them from appearing in the first place.
There are numerous areas the place Botox can be injected for points with noticeable crow's toes and creases. Therapy might be utilized to the forehead, in between eyebrows, outside the eyes, Tajmeel World Social Network transverse nasal area, around the mouth, chin, and neck. Of course, there are particular measurements and amount of Botox that should be adhered to when treating any of those areas.
Sufferers who have had procedures of this sort, report that there's very little, if no ache at all, at injection sites. This is because of the micro-sized needle that's used to properly give the medication. If any feeling تجميل الأنف في ايران is current, it's going to normally only consist of a minor stinging, burning or slight amount of pressure. All are short lived and barely noticeable, if you are not fortunate sufficient to not really feel something.
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