#then when i replay i make an oc and give them a background and stuff

[whynotwinnie]

Timida part 2: Roger Taylor x OC

a quick part 2 that i wrote just now hopefully I keep the momentum lol

Timida Part 2 

No Trigger warnings yet (there is one cuss word though)

MICKEY

“It took you long enough,” Roger said you could see his fake mad face from here. You couldn’t help but laugh checking the clock on your wall reading 7:37

“Sorry, I left the cafe a little later than expected.”

“What time did you end up leaving?”

“It was almost 7 when I walked out.”

“Are you kidding me?” he shouted into the receiver. You flinched at the sudden noise jerking your head from the speaker.

“I was literally right there, I could’ve stopped by after recording to go see you again. I thought you would be gone by then.” hearing the pout that he definitely had on his face made your heart jerk.

“I actually usually stay there for a while, I don’t like being at home by myself,” you cringed at yourself realizing how you sound “I mean like- I don’t like being lonely,” you ran your hand through your hair wishing you could go back in time.

“I understand what you mean like you realize how alone you are when you’re… well alone. I used to get like that too when I moved out but now that I live with one of my bandmates I wish I could be alone.” He joked.

God, he is so nice and respectful good thing you didn’t hang up.

“That’s exactly how I feel.” you almost whispered to the receiver

“Don’t feel bad I’m sure everyone has gone through that in one way or another, but hey you’re never alone you have me, and if you’re lucky I’ll only bother you all the time.”

You laughed, he is so good at talking you felt yourself start to relax and you pulled a nearby chair to the phone hook so you can sit and talk.

“How was your band recording going?” wishing you sounded less awkward than you felt. 

“It was great actually we hardly fought this time and we didn’t have to record the same song more than six times so I’ll say it’s a win.”

“Do you guys fight often?”

“Well… Noooo-yeah we do but we know not to take it to heart we all just want the best for the group, by the end of the day whatever fight broke out is forgotten and forgiven. It’s very rare that we don’t fight but hey, maybe today was my lucky day with meeting you and a good band practice.”

Your face burned. 

“Oh well, I got free coffee today and met you so I think I got lucky too.”

You spent the rest of the time getting to know little things about each other

What’s your last name? Taylor, What’s yours? Oliviero-Vila. What’s your favorite color? Black, can I guess yours. Sure. Purple. No, it’s Green. Green does suit you, Mickey. Do you have any siblings? Yeah, my sister is named Clare. Do you have siblings? I have four older brothers. Jesus Christ four? Yeah, their names are Lucas, Marcelino, Benvolio, and Matias. How was that? Yeah, growing up was a pain but I love them… I guess. Do you have a middle name, mine is Luciana. No, I don’t have a middle name. You don’t? Nope. Are you sure? I’m sure. Are you lying? No why would I lie about my middle name? I don’t know maybe because you don’t like it. Who doesn’t like their middle name? Roger are you going to tell me your middle name or not. Fine… It’s Meddows. I like it! Well of course you do, you’re a girl. I’ll switch you Luciana for Meddows. I’ll take that deal.

It went on and on until he brought up what you did for work. 

“Well it’s kind of a long story but I used to work for this seamstress downtown but recently I decided to go a different direction and work for myself.”

“So do you like fix clothes?” 

Ouch 

“Well I do that, but I also make my own clothes which is my real passion but as of right now all the orders I get are me making hemlines or fixing a patch.” 

“Where have you advertise your stuff?”

“At the cafe actually I put my information on the community bulletin board and got a handful of customers.”

“Next time you and I can go hang flyers all throughout town advertising your stuff if you want.”

“That’s okay,” you said grinning “I think I’m doing well for myself as of right now.”

“Let me kno- Fred are you serious right now Mickey can you give me a second please.”

You heard commotion on the other end of the line another voice and Roger arguing back and forth until.

“Hello Darling, is this Mickey?” you heard Rogers voice faintly in the background “Fred stop that’s not funny.”

“Umm yes.”

“You sound pretty I can understand why Roger was an hour late to recording today.” Rogers voice again in the back “C’mon don’t do that”

“I’m so sorry I didn’t know he had anywhere to be.” were you in trouble right now?

“That’s okay dear I don’t blame you, of course, it’s this devil over here that causes all the trouble. But I have to say he could not stop talking about you he just kept going on and on about how you were so beautiful and how funny you are.”

You stayed quiet, how are you supposed to answer that?

“I don’t think I’m that funny.” 

The other voice laughed “I think we’re going to get along great, I’m Freddie one of Roger’s bandmates and his flatmate so for future warning don’t fuck in my room.”

You choked red in the face “Oh gosh no- I wouldn’t- I mean in your room- I mean I just met Ro-”

“I’m just joking darling! Please you are too sweet I’ll let you go but I do expect to see you soon. Ta!” Freddie then handed the phone to Roger who had some choice words for him.

“I’m so sorry about that Mickey, I couldn’t grab the phone from him because he was sitting on me.”

“It’s okay no harm done, he is actually quite funny.”

“Yeah, he’s like that all the time.” he yawned you checked the time 12:26.

“I can let you go, I think that’s enough excitement for the day,” you said 

“I would love to continue to talk to you Mickey, honestly.” 

“Can I call you tomorrow?” you said softly

“Yes please,” he sighed “Our recording ends at the same time but on the weekend we’re off, do you think I can take you on a date then?”

“I would like that very much, Roger.” 

“Great. I’ll let you get your sleep now Mickey.”

“Ok, I’ll talk to you tomorrow Roger.”

“Goodnight love” and he hung up.

That “goodnight love” kept replaying in your head until it felt fake, you couldn’t possibly go to bed. 

You looked back at the discarded fabric at your work station and decided that it was time to start the gown.

You turned on your ancient sewing machine and pulled out your mannequin to drape the fabric on. 

Five hours later you had finished a dark blue off shoulder, A-line evening dress. It was simple but chic. You wish you had a camera so you could take a photo of it but the sketch would do. Maybe you could ask the client to take a photo of it for you so you can save it to your portfolio. You yawned shaking your head, now you really needed to go to bed.

Taking off your jeans you slid into your comforter thinking about how your day played out, wondering what turn of events led you to meet Roger. Thinking about him made your heart squeeze and then you thought of the last thing he said to you was “Good night love.” and you shut your eyes and slept.

[lovemychoices]

Playing with Fire - RoD AU [Colt x MC] - Ch.2 2/2

Book: Ride or Die

Once upon a time, an angel fell for a devil and they called it true love. -J.P.D

Kaela Matsuo didn’t think she would fall in love with someone during her senior year of highschool it was the last thing on her mind but then she met Colt while hanging out with Logan and everything changed. After taking down Jason and saying their heartbreaking goodbyes will Kaela and Colt ever find a way back to each other again? And if they do are they ready to face new obstacles together?

Characters except my OCs belong to Pixelberry, I am just borrowing them.

Word count : 5000+++

Chapter Summary: Kaela tries to forget Colt the only way she knows how.

A/N : Sorry it’s been months since this series has been updated and to be honest IDK when the next chapter will be up. Sorry for any grammatical error I didn’t have the time to do edits.

Warning/Triggers : Alcohol and Drug abuse. [Make sure you’re 18 years old and above if you read this]

catch up with the series here

Song Inspiration: Signals in Smoke - Coming up for air

How long can you wait

To breathe deep

How long can you stay

Underneath

It's hard to believe

But I know your heart still beats

Rise on up baby

Don't need eyes to see

Later that night, Kaela followed the direction of the address that Riya texted her which lead to a gated mansion somewhere in the hills but she couldn’t hear or see any signs of a party.

Confused she double checks the address on her GPS System. “This should be the right place?” She murmured to herself. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

A loud knock on her window causes her to jolt in her seat. She looks the drivers window and sees a man with strong build body wearing a crisp black suit. She cautiously rolls down her window a little.

“You lost or something miss?” The man asked eyeing her curiously.

“Um.. I’m here for a party at Mike’s place?” She answered showing the digital invite on her phone. The man takes a look at the screen taking his own phone from his pocket and started scanning the barcode on Kaela’s invite.

INVITE VALID

He gives her an approving nod and the gates in front of her open. She lets out a sigh of relief then nods back at him and quickly puts her gear into drive.

As she drives through the estate she sees a few dimly lit lamp posts and perfectly trimmed hedges. A little while after she could hear the faint sound of music playing in the background. In the driveway a bunch of expensive sports cars parked next to a two storey modern mansion.

Wow! This is where Mike lives? She checks herself in the rear-view mirror then heaves a sigh. You can do this it’s just one night out. Kaela felt like she needed something to calm her nerves so she reaches out to open her dashboard taking out an orange prescription bottle labeled Xanax on it which she had bought from one of her classmates a month ago. “Fuck! I’m all out.” She muttered throwing her head back on the headrest then glance towards mansion.

Maybe they’ll have something in there. Rich people always have the best prescription pills.

As she approaches the top step, a housekeeper opens the front door. Loud party noise and music blasted out as she enters, she felt like she was in some sort of fraternity party. People were dancing around consumed by the music around them, to the right a group of people cheering on a few guys doing a keg stand challenged.

I need to find the master bath, it must be somewhere upstairs.

“Kaela! Kaela over here!” Riya calls out with her hands waved in the air, quickly walking over to where Kaela was standing. “Omg, I’m so glad you decide to come!” She beamed excitedly giving Kaela a hug. “Come on, let's head outside by the pool, I have a few friends I want to introduce you to.”

Before Kaela can protest Riya takes her hand and guides her along the crowd to the middle of the living area and through the back door where a large swimming pool was located next to the house.

“Everyone, Kaela. Kaela, everyone.” Riya introduces her to a few people sitting by the pool.

“Hey Kaela!” Everyone greets in unison. “Hi…” Kaela smiles giving a sheepish wave. One of the girls stood up and hugged her excitedly taking Kaela by surprise. She pulls back a few moments later. “So nice to finally meet you, we always wondered when we were going to meet this mysterious Kaela, Riya’s always talking about. I’m Jane by the way.”

“Really Riya talks about me a lot?” She asked cocking and eyebrow at Riya.

Riya chuckles. “Only the good stuff I promise!” Kaela shakes her head and grabs a beer from the chiller next to her and twisting the cap open and has a sip before taking a seat next to Riya

“So does Mike have these parties all the time? Where is he anyway? I didn’t see him on the way in.”

Will snorts. “Probably inside entertaining the ladies, lucky bastard.”

The DJ starts to play a song Riya excitedly jump from her seat. “Oh I love this song!” She exclaims taking Kaela’s hand. “Common Kaela time to let loose and dance all your troubles away.”

Riya and the others danced moving their body as the music plays not missing a beat. Kaela watches stiff at first, she can’t remember the last time she danced like that. “Kaela don’t just stand there!” Riya said as she swayed from side to side.

“I’m gonna need more alcohol if I’m going to get through this.” She mutterd under her breath.

She quickly grabs a few glasses of neon shots from people nearby downing them in one go. Soon enough the alcohol starts to kick in, her body loosens, she starts swaying her hips to the sound of the music. For that brief moment she felt all her pain and sorrow being suppressed. She continues to dance letting the hours pass by, not stopping until suddenly the DJ plays a familiar song.

***

Flash back here…

Kaela takes in the electric colours, blacklight illuminated the ravers neon clothing. Drinks glow blue, pink and purple against the darkness. It was her first time going to a rave and it wasn’t like she had expected. She glanced down to see the colours on her clothes she borrowed from Mona how they brilliantly under the luminous lighting. Her eyes go wide opened and beamed. “Wow it’s like I’m radioactive!”

“You’re welcome.” Mona gave her a playful wink.

The group stood at the back as they watched other people dance around. “So what do we do?” Kaela asked.

“What do we do? We dance!” Mona answered with a smirk.

“Yeah. But like… how?”

Ximena chuckles. “However you want Hun. do what feels good, don’t overthink it.”

Mona sways sensually to the music, Toby jumps up and down. Salazar moves to an open spot at the dance floor and breaks into an energetically sequence of sliding and foot pumping. “And that’s called the Melbourne shuffle.” He beamed. The crew applauds and laugh. Even Logan shakes his head for smiles. He can feel his phone vibrate and excuses himself for a bit leaving Kaela and Colt alone while the others were off busy dancing.

Let's dance in style, let's dance for a while

Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies

Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst

Are you gonna drop the bomb or not?

Let us die young or let us live forever

We don't have the power, but we never say never

Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip

The music's for the sad man

“Oh! I love this song!” She beamed excitedly. “Come on, Colt!”

Colt hesitated looking at the rest of the crew doing their thing. “I.. don’t really dance.”

Kaela chuckles. “Me neither. Now come on!” She quickly took Colt’s hand before he could protest. Lacing their fingers together she leads him away out of sight from the rest of the crew.

Colt pulled her body close to his and tilted her chin face up to look at him, his lips curled up into a grin. “I would be lying if I said I haven’t been waiting to get you to myself today. Just follow my lead.” He turned her around so her back is facing his then lightly touches her waist, they both swayed effortlessly to the beat. In time with the pulsating beat he pushes her away then pulled her back closer this time with her face inches away from his. “Is Logan watching?”

“Why do you care if he does?” She quirked an eyebrow at him.

“Is it bad that a part of me wants him to?” He grinned.

“I’m not some possession for you two to fight over, Colt. I’m an actual person.”

“You’re not.. you’re more than that Kaela. At least to me you are.”

“What am I to you Colt?” Colt paused for a moment, they both stopped for a moment in the middle of the crowd of people dancing. He tucks a strand of Kaela’s loose hair to the back of her ear, she can see passion in his eyes as he looks at her. Colt leans in until his lips are just a breath away from hers, “You’re my driver forever, Kaela.”

She pushed her hands through Colt’s hair, bringing his mouth to hers.In that moment they both forget about everything and everyone in the room, even the loud music starts to fade into the background as they drown in each others kiss.

***

Present day..

Can you imagine when this race is won?

Turn our golden the faces into the sun

Praising our leaders, we're getting in tune

The music's played by the, the madman.

Forever young

I want to be forever young

Do you really want to live forever?

Forever, and ever.

That song, it was the song that she and Colt danced to at Hyrieus a year ago. Kaela could feel her heart beating fast and loudly as all the memories of that night with Colt replayed in her head. Suddenly the pain and sorrow comes crashing back at her, she felt like she was suffocating. “I need to get out of here.” Kaela pants and quickly pushed her way through the crowd walking up a flight of stairs leading to the first floor corridor.

She tries to open every door she comes across but each one she found was always locked until eventually one opens. She enters to what seems like the master bedroom and without a second thought saunters directly towards the bathroom.

Kaela stands in front of the mirror, hands pressed on the sink leaning with her head down. She closes her eyes and began reciting the same words repeatedly in her head. Breathe in one two three, breathe out three two one. ”Fuck this isn’t working.” She muttered under her breath, her eyes moves towards the Medicine cabinet in front of her.

Maybe there’s something in here that will.

She opens it and starts rummaging through. Lets see few dental flosses, vitamins, health supplements. Urgh where’s the good stuff?

She finally got her hands an orange prescription bottle, she took a look at the description labeled OXYCODONE one time daily or when needed. BINGO! Without even hesitating she popped the bottle open taking one pill and quickly putting it in her mouth swallowing it, later filling up a glass of water and drinking it all in one go. Kaela that the perception bottle from the sink counter top and shoves it in her purse, adjusting her messy hair before heading out.

She slowly closes the door behind her, failing to notice someone standing right outside she bumps right into them.

“Woah, careful!” Someone said catching her by the arm as she stammers back surprised, she looks up and sees a familiar face. “Mike, when did you get here?”

“Um.. I live here, it’s my party remember? What are you doing all the way up here?” He answers cocking an eyebrow.

“I um… needed to find the bathroom but got lost. Big house you got here.” She replied nervously. “But you know I succeeded in finding one so all good.”

“Good to know.” He chuckles then folds his arms scanning Kaela head to toe. “Listen, I’m heading up to the rooftop garden to get some air. You could join me if you want?”

“You have a rooftop garden?” Kaela thought for a moment before giving a half shrug.“Sure why not? I need to get some air anyway.”

Mike took her up another flight of stairs, he opened the door which lead to a beautiful rooftop garden.It had a miniature garden with pebble stones lining the pathway on one side and on the other side an outside bar with a hot tub overlooking the view of the neighborhood. Kaela’s eyes go wide open. “Wow! This is your rooftop? It’s amazing!”q

“You can thank my interior designer for that it was her vision. So have a seat anywhere you want.”

Kaela climbs on top edge of the roof and takes a seat at the edge, her legs dangling from above. She could see the pool right below her and the view of the landscape in front of her.

“This view is amazing. No offense but how’d you end up with a place like this? I thought you only owned a gym.”

Mike runs his hands through his hair. “Well not just a gym, I have few others all over California. Most of my clients big shot politics and A list celebrities. Plus my family is rich.”

Kaela snorts. “No kidding.”

“I’m serious..My last name is actually West.”

Kaela chokes a little when she hears the name. “As in West industries? They’re like multimillionaires?” Mike silently nods then looks away. “So... Why run a gym instead of being some big hot shot CEO?”

Mike shrugged at her question. “I didn’t really want to go into the family business. I’ve spent my whole life having my father tell me what I’m supposed to be and I’ve always felt so suffocated, you know? It wasn’t until I lost everything I ever cared about that I decided enough is enough.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice. I definitely know what it’s like to have a parent expect you to be someone you’re not.”

“Strike one of something we have in common.” He smirked. “I’m keeping score to see how compatible we are. You know for future reference.” He explains and gives a playful wink.

Kaela chuckles. “That’s a really interesting way of keeping score. Does it always work?”

“Most of the time.”

There was an awkward silence between them for a few seconds. Shit is he thinking of kissing me? Please don’t You’re going to ruin the moment. Mike starts to lean in, trying to close the gap between them, he was obviously going to kiss her. Kaela tilts her head down a look of regret written on her face. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this. You’re a really nice guy Mike, but I just got out of a serious relationship and I’m just not ready.”

Mike leans back, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, I didn’t know. How long have the two of you been broken up?”

“We didn’t Break up. He—. He—.” She fumbled trying to form the words. Take deep breaths and exhale slowly Kaela. ”He was involved in an accident about 3 months, he didn’t make it.”

“I’m sorry to hear about that, believe me I know what it’s like losing someone you love. To have them suddenly ripped from you.” He seethes, Kaela noticed his jaw clenched and his hands ball into a fist.

“Who was she?” She asked, Mike turns to look at her, his expression a mixture between sad and confused. “When you said you lost everything you cared about earlier. I’m assuming it has to do with someone you cared about.”

“She was.. Someone I met in college sophomore year. She was the most kind and beautiful person I have ever met. We started dating a few months after knowing each other then it went from that to being in a relationship for the next 5 years.” Mike paused for a moment he fidget with a silver ring on his finger. Kaela could barely make out the words engraved on the ring but it has the initials M&K.

“You know the night of the accident we were supposed to spend the weekend at one of my family's estates in the mountains. I had this whole plan to propose to her.” He paused again with regret written on his face. “But I got held back at work, so I told her I’d have someone pick her up she could head up there first and I would catch up later. A few hours later I got a call from the police…..”

As Mike told Kaela about the night his girlfriend got into a car accident, voices of that night she got the call from Ximena regarding Colt’s accident starts replaying in her head.

“Kaela honey, I wish I was calling you under different circumstances and I’m sorry to be the one telling you this but—.”

“But what X? You need to tell me.”

“It’s about Colt. He’s.. He’s been in an accident and he didn’t make it.”

“Kaela. Hey Kaela you alright?”

She is slowly pulled out of her thoughts by the sound of Mike’s voice.

“Are you alright?”

“I uh… yeah. I’m fine.” She mentions, tucking strand of loose hair to the back of her ear.

“Anyway the trick is to focus on something that will make you forget. For me it was martial arts, I got to channel all my anger into someplace else. Who knows, it might be for you too. Whenever you ready just give me a call.”

He handed her his business card and she takes it, giving him a weak smile.

“We should probably head back to the party. Riya might be worried and looking for you.”

Mike slowly got up and steps away from the edge, he stretched out his hand to Kaela.

“You coming?”

“Uh… Yeah. Hey you go ahead I’ll be right behind you.”

When Mike wasn’t looking she quickly popped another piece of pill into her mouth, closing her eyes and taking deeps breaths she could feel the pill start to kick in.

Maybe this is just what I need.

*****

In the weeks to come Kaela’s night were filled with parties endless drinking and getting high, anything to make her forget. She was sick of feeling miserable, she was sick of crying herself to sleep at night. This felt like the easiest way out to her. She did a pretty good job at hiding it from her friends and family though. Since she only hung out with Riya a few times a month and visit her dad once a month, nobody took notice in her sudden change of lifestyle choices. Everyone just assumed she had finally accepted what happened to Colt and moved on.

“No.. We are not watching that Ri.”

“Please K?” Riya pouts her lips.

“Omg… We are not going to watch TO ALL THE BOYS I’VE LOVED BEFORE for the 5th time.”

“But.. But.. Peter Kavinsky.” She pouted again throwing her puppy dog eyes at Kaela.

Kaela rolled her eyes at Riya. “Okay find, but I’m picking the next one.”

“Deal!” Riya grinned and hit the play button on the remote.

“I need to use the bathroom for a bit, the pizza delivery guy will be here soon. Take care of it will you?”

A few seconds later there is a buzz on the door, Riya opens and is greeted by the delivery guy. “That will be twenty four fifty.” He says hold the pizza box out.

Riya takes it and shuffles through her purse for cash but is a little short. “Um.. I’m a little short on cash. Could you hand on a sec?” She hurries to the island and grabs Kaela’s purse to get some cash but she ends up finding more. Oxycodone? She quickly stuffs the bottle in her jeans and pays the pizza guy. “Here you go, keep the change.”

A few minutes later Kaela came out of the bathroom and saunters over to the living area, Riya was seated on the couch glaring at her. “Is something wrong?”

“Mind telling me what’s this?” Riya asked holding up an orange pill bottle. “What do you even need Oxycodone for?”

“Omg.. Did you just go through my stuff without my permission?!” She retorted, her hands balling into a fist. “You have no right to do that Riya.”

“I was short on cash and looked through you purse to borrow some. Maybe it’s a good thing I did or who knows how long your drug addiction was going to continue.” She gives Kaela a pointed look. “Is that why you’ve been so chill the past few months? Because you’ve been using? What else have you been using? Heroin? Cocaine?”

“I’m not a drug addict if that’s what you’re implying, I only use them when I go to parties or when I’m feeling stressed out.” She folds her arms her with her eyes downcast. “And for the record I don’t do heroin or cocaine. I’m mostly on prescription pill and occasionally Molly.”

“Kaela how could you be so stupid?! Grieving is one thing but this?!”

“Don’t talk to me like you know what it’s like to feel grief. I tried to grieve him, Riya. Trust me I've got grieving down to a science at this point. But every time I let it sink in that I'm never gonna see you again, I feel like I'm gonna die.” She whimpered. “I— I want to die!

“You can’t say things like that Kaela.”

“And why not? It’s the truth! I can’t do this anymore.. I’m sorry.. I need to go somewhere.” She said taking her purse from the counter and storms out of the apartment, Riya chasing her shortly after into the parking lot “Kaela where are you going, you can’t do this you need help. Just talk to me please!” She pleaded reaching to take her hand but Kaela

“Omg! Riya can you like not!” She belts swatting Riya’s hand away as she tries to take her. “Just leave me alone!” She quickly gets into her car and drives away while Riya watches her from behind.

*****

Kaela drives aimlessly through the streets of LA, she didn’t know where she was going, she just needed to get away from Riya. She needed to get away from everything, to clear her head and a long drive usually does the trick.

Soon she found herself off the highway and on to the freeway which soon lead to a winding road. She could feel her heart pounding as she picks up speed, tears starting to fog her eyes. I can’t do this anymore.. I just can’t. Her phone starts ringing and she looks down at the passenger seat where it was lying, it was Riya calling. She hits the reject button and turns back to the road when she did suddenly out of no where a stray dog was standing in the middle of the winding road and only a few meters from her car, she turned the steering wheel to avoid hitting the pup but at the speed she was going in it made her quickly loose control. Her car swivels on the winding road and rammed onto a divider before flipping over.

Kaela remained strapped to her seat hanging upside down.. The smell of something burning nearby, blood was dripping from her forehead to the ground and her vision was starting to get blurry, she could barely make out what looks like a figure, maybe a passerby who saw the accident dashing over to where she was. “Help me...” She murmurs in a weak voice but before the person manages to get her out she passes out and everything turns to black.

*************************************************

@liamzigmichael4ever @client-327 @brightpinkpeppercorn @lovehugsandcandy @lilyofchoices @justdani14 @zaffrenotes @queenkaneko @mskaneko @pintsizedelle @flowerpowell @desiree-0816 @emceesynonymroll @kinkykingliam @jlpplays1 @annekebbphotography @thecordoniandiaries @cora-nova @rainbowsinthestorm @princess-geek @leelee10898 @emichelle @pixelberrytrash

[foxgloves-fox-love]

Self-shipping AU

Just wanted to do these questions hehe ;w;

1. What kind of blog does your f/o have? Do they selfship on main? Do they look like a regular fan? Quiet reblogs or lots of gushing? Lots of analyses of your character and your source or incoherent blabbering? Do they have a headcanon blog? Do they try to roleplay as you?

Ren is shameless and only has like one sideblog that he reserves for creative stuff. He posts everything else onto his main blog. He also gushes a lot just lots of keysmashing and talking about how cute I am, and not a lot of analyses just tons of blabbering. He posts all his headcanons on his main blog and frequently tags pictures with our ship name if they remind him of us.

2. Do they prefer selfshipping by inserting themselves into your source, or by daydreaming about you in their own little / personal world, or by imagining you by their side during their daily life?

He definitely daydreams about me in his own little world especially before bed and also imagines me by his side during his daily life. He would probably insert himself into my source as well bc he's not satisfied with where he is in his life. He just wants to do everything.

3. What’s their self insert like? Is their s/i literally them? Is it basically them but with just a few changes - to be more like the person they’d like to be, or to “fit in” your source better? Is their s/i totally OP or extra or more realistic? Is it an OC that’s totally different from them?

His s/i is literally him. He doesn't change parts of himself to fit into my source or to be more like he wants to be because he uses self-shipping as coping and wants me to love him for him.

4. Do they spend more time on wikipedia, on your fandom wiki, on your TV tropes page? Looking for official content they might’ve missed, like fun trivia? Looking for fanart, for fics? Looking for information and details and references for fics or art or other fancontent they’re making because they want to make sure they get everything right?

He's definitely a fandom wiki kind of guy and scours the internet for content. He doesn't need to look at references that much because he has me memorized pretty easily. There are multiple looks I've gone through in "canon" and while he loves all of them and it's hard to remember all of them, he tends to stick with the one that's most currently out in canon because it makes him feel like he's living beside me.

5. Do they create anything inspired by you and/or their ship with you? Fanart? Fanfics? Gifsets? Moodboards? Edits? Songs? Dances? Crafts? Playlists? Cosplays? Do they post them (or pictures of them) online? Do they sell any merch (online, at cons, etc)? Do they make pics of their selfship in dollmakers? Do they spend hours on otp prompt generators? Do they commission art of their selfship?

He creates fanart but doesn't draw much anymore and is kind of sad about it because he misses how much he used to draw. Instead he tends to write fic and create songs and playlists. He posts his music and stuff online on his sideblog for creative stuff and doesn't sell merch when he goes to cons. Because he doesn't draw as much anymore he LOVES making us in dollmakers and picrews. He also commissions a shit ton of art for his selfship and is completely shameless about it.

6. Does your f/o have a selfship wedding with you? Do they celebrate it on their blog or more privately, with their fellow selfshipper friends? Do they make any content (like art, fics, etc) to celebrate?

He wrote a song to propose with and is waiting for anime canon to catch up to his favorite part from the manga before posting it and making a huge deal about it. When he does have the wedding he commissions a really extravagant wedding picture and has it framed and put in his room.

7. Does your f/o have fankids with you? If not, maybe pets?

We own a dog and he wants to have kids when we get married so he can cope with his anxieties of being a bad father.

8. Do your f/o and your friend’s f/o plan for double dates since their f/os (you and your friend) are from the same source? How would that go?

lmao :') idk? >w> Maybe Farz and Ren would do that...

9. If you have multiple f/os (romantic, platonic, anything), imagine them making or joining a Discord server or a group chat about you or your source. Who gushes, who shares art and fics, who analyses everything, who sends memes?

Oh god lmao. So like I was doing this for Ren, but imagining everyone in a discord server is killing me!!! Vincent would do nothing but post porn gifs and be an absolute butt and laugh at people all the time and Jack would like never talk in it except to post the occasional psychological profile of me and talk about how interesting I am every once in a blue moon. Gengar would just cry type all the time. Craig would shitpost with memes and laugh at people because he’s a dick and not actually into self-shipping and Shino would analyze EVERYTHING from the show. The people who would gush and talk the most would be Ren and Omen ;w; Ren would share his music and Omen would think it's all very interesting. Omen might even develop a crush because Ren is so interesting and Ren would be completely oblivious bc he’s guzzling that self-ship juice lmao.

10. Does your f/o have very creative ship names, or are they bad with finding tags / ship names, or do they just use regular fandom tags?

Ren likes the ship name Rae and uses that irl, but he likes to do the fun creative ones in order to tag stuff. He uses "Little Star" for it.

11. What’s your f/o like when they read / watch / play your source? Do they reread / rewatch / replay their favorite parts over and over? Do they make comments aloud? Which parts of your story made them laugh? Made them cry?

Ren gets really happy when he watches the anime because it's very relaxing. He watches his favorite parts over and over and over again until he can say the dialogue by heart. He doesn't make comments aloud but he gets super emotionally invested. His favorite parts that make him laugh are when I say goofy or dumb things and then comment on the irony and break the 4th wall. The parts that make him cry the most are any time I get hurt and start crying. When I got bullied or felt bad with my classmates or was hurt when I was very young. All of those hurt him a lot and he cried about it.

12. Do they post any videos related to your source? Like AMVs? Or reaction vids (with them reacting to your source as they read / watch / play / etc)? If your source is a game, do they make a walkthrough? Is it a perfect walkthrough, a more casual one?

He would like to make AMVs but doesn't really have editing software for it, but wants to learn! He wants to post reaction vids but is nervous about posting his face online for...reasons. lmao

13. Which of your f/os has “y/n’s husband / wife / partner” as a username online?

Ren would definitely call himself my biggest fan. He wouldn't use husband but he'd definitely use fanboy.

14. Do they have merch of you? What kind of merch? Posters? Keychains? Stickers? Stuffed toys? (And if they have a plush of you, do they kiss it and sleep with it?)

He has a plush that he cuddles and sleeps with and sometimes makes out with lmao. He also has so much merch!!! He is the type to make ita content. On Christmas he decorates the tree with stuff and has posters all over the walls. His favorites tho are figures. He looooooooves figures the most. He's constantly shelling out the big bucks for the biggest and most detailed ones because he can look at them and feel like I exist in a 3d space.

15. What kind of content do they like / make the most? Is it fluff? Angst? Hurt / comfort? (btw: imagine your f/os going to you when they need comfort, because they love you and you’re comforting to them.) Do they respect canon or do they make lots of AUs? What kind of AUs do they like?

-rubs hands together- His favorite content is hurt/comfort both with me being hurt and me hurting the other party, depending on his mood. When he gets unstable and lonely he plays out angsty situations to further his spirals. He knows it's unhealthy, but it comforts him at the same time. His favorite when he's feeling like being healthier is making irl AUs where he can play out his trauma with me as a caretaker figure or alongside him and comforting me.

16. Which of your f/os has 1341 pics of you saved on their phone / laptop? What kind of pic did they choose as their phone / laptop background? Is it a canon pic of you, or fanart, or art of their selfship with you?

Ren definitely hoards a lot of shit on his phone, he has so much content of me on it it's ridiculous. Omen kind of does the same but not nearly as much because he has multiple f/os and has to share space with them lmao. Vincent's phone is just filled with porn ok just lots of rule 34 shit but he also like doesn't have a lot of content on it because like he's just a horndog and only really gives a shit about the dirty content. Jack has pictures but not a lot because he prefers to fantasize.