#the some reason i think is actually bc i saw a video of billie eilish ticcing and talking about her tourettes and it triggered mine

[angelphilic]

ive been ticcing all day for some reason so my neck hurts this is so hateful

[rnegitsune]

Ok so I thought I'd put together some horror stories from my time as a babymetal fan bc of how drastic the shift in the fandom has been the past year or so. For context I got into babymetal in like june of 2014 (all 3 girls were still underage at the time, I was 22; when I first got into them I thought I would be considered an older fan lmao the naivete, the innocence of new fan me wow I know now I'm not at all in the older half of the fandom esp considering I was born the same decade as su and moa), and I made this blog in I think may of 2015.

I've had people say I should compile men being gross into a post and I just couldn't do that out of fear for my own mental health but this will be pretty close. These are all my experiences with this fandom over the years; I'm definitely missing some but what I do remember should do well to cover most of how this fandom used to be vs now. It's gonna be a lot and tw for men being gross about minors.

Back in my first year or so of this blog I on multiple occasions got dms from men asking to be friends. At the time my bio only said my name and my pronouns. I've always been cautious of dms so I'd ask their age and every single one was considerably older than me. I wouldn't usually answer after that bc no thanks but they would generally try to continue convos til I blocked. The only one I still had was this one

After I put my age in my bio, which was 23 at the time, I never got a dm like that again; take from that what you will. But if you're young please be wary of this hell fandom even now. And if you're an older fan and esp an older male fan reading this, don't dm people trying to be friends. I was over 18 and it still creeped me out to no end.

One of my real first men in this fandom are disgusting moments was a blog back in like 2015 or 2016 who I had some contact with due to common interests; he was a huge yui stan and made bm content. He was like 28 or 29 at the time and I eventually noticed he would tag idols, mostly kpop girls, by their body parts (legs, butt, etc) which is disgusting enough as it is but then I saw him do the same for literal minors, like tzuyu from twice. I messaged him asking what the hell he was doing objectifying women but also actual children and he blocked me lmao. He later unblocked me to let me know that's just how he tagged things and it was my fault he had anxiety and then he blocked me again.

Back before the tumblr purge this fandom was repulsive to a degree I cannot even begin to describe. Someone would reblog something from me, I'd go to their blog and it would be underage jpop idols and japanese p*rn all the way down. I even stumbled upon a man editing underage su into p*rn gifs. Obviously no proof of that but I did go find my initial reaction to it

The number of times I'd get a follow from someone then go to their blog and it would be as mentioned above or their bio would be the most misogynistic trash I'd ever read was staggering. I genuinely considered giving up and deleting this blog so many times bc i felt oberwhelmed and outnumbered by these gross old dudes; and so the fact that this fandom has evolved into a bunch of chaotic wlw?? Amazing, I could cry.

Fun phenomenon of women running bm blogs was men sending messages asking if we liked babymetal. No joke. I think this happened to me two or three times but I spoke w other female creators at the time and it had happened to them as well. My entire blog is babymetal, and yet???

He said the weird guy idk bc he sent some random ass messages vaguely insulting me and when I responded coldly, he acted confused so I said you're some guy idk, hence the above message starting as such. Also that pic and the one up above that has my current pfp bc I just took those screenshots. Like I said I typically blocked weird dms but I guess these passed me by so I still had the messages.

Most people know the sub reddit is the worst and don't need me to tell you but it's a hellscape and I highly recommend avoiding it. A short list of things I've had to see as a result of going there: men discussing at length kano and momoko's appearances and how they look in costume vs in normal clothes. Men discussing at length the hope that the girls would marry men who aren't Japanese, a thread that was from when all 3 girls were underage. They aren't gonna marry you dude they're really not.

The insulting of billie Eilish, a 17 year old at the time, was horrible too. Su and moa got to meet her, something they were extremely excited for, and they posted a pic; the comments were disgusting as you can imagine. The yui rumors were terrible too, fatshaming, slutshaming etc all based on nothing. Some man saying the rumors about yui leaving bc, no joke this was a real rumor, she "got too fat" couldn't be true bc "look at saya." Saya being a barely 18 yo back up dancer who covered the third spot after yui left but before the avengers. Not to mention the upskirt shots from when they were minors, the constant editing of their faces onto explicit photoshoots etc. I remember being a new fan looking for a su pic on google and being horrified at the fact that one of the top suggested results after her name was “bikini;” she was 16 at the time. Also, the uptick in massively creepy posts and messages sent to bm blogs as each girl, but esp moa and yui, approached 18 was disgusting.

Now for some personal nonsense. A big reason why I haven't touched my youtube channel in months is bc I got tired of dealing with the men of this fandom. I poke fun at metal and get told I deserve to die. I say ped*philes and creepy men are gross and get a swarm of middle aged men cursing at me. Had a guy cry about how men are shamed for liking bm and then he turned around and said some gross shit about wlw. Had a guy call me racist for liking a band he also likes (and despite him having no way of knowing my own race) and tell me the babymetal fandom doesn't need my kpop feminist bullshit, which is honestly a great description and I thought about putting it in my yt about lmao. Had a middle aged man unironically say he'd never seen a man be creepy towards bm but fans su and moa's ages calling them hot was creepy. The disillusionment....the level of unawareness is astounding. If you want to see screenshots of some of these comments they are fairly recent in my don't mind me tag; I don't want to see them anymore tho bc they're infuriating so I'm not going to look at them to post here.

Essentially I haven't looked at my channel since may bc men are exhausting and rude and refuse to examine the fandoms they're a part of no matter what. They're told by a woman of the fandom that she's had bad experiences personally and they all start crying about how it's either a lie bc they haven't seen it or unimportant. I did stop reading comments in may and I will never read another one again probably as a result of this shit. Trash men being trash are not worth my time and I refuse to give them anymore of it. I do plan on making more videos tho and let my ~feminist kpop bullshit~ live in their minds rent free.

I will also continue to make fun of metal and the creepy men in this fandom bc it's important and I'm a spiteful asshole who likes disrupting these dudes perfect bubble of a fandom. It genuinely brings me so much joy seeing all the new fans recently (which sidenote if you got into them recently I am kinda curious as to how you found them; I've gotten tons of new followers and considering how inactive they are rn I'm curious). People sending messages about how they finally feel like they belong or that they have a safe space....like I don't even know what to say and I never feel like my responses fully convey how genuinely wonderful that is and how thrilled I am that this is where we're at now and I have had at least some part in it. As this post shows, my experiences have been negative for the most part so the shift recently is such a relief I cannot even begin to explain my gratitude.

So to anyone who read all of this and hasn't disintegrated from the male bullshit, thank you. Keep being yourself and fighting for your place in this fandom, esp if you're a young woman; keep making fun of the creeps and keep making wlw memes!! Babymetal's music is in such a huge way meant for girls and to see more and more finding their way to this previously hellish beyond belief fandom is incredible.

[cuziloveyou7]

ULT GROUP TAG GAME

Tagged by: the one, the only, the always gorgeous @randombtsprincessa

I really wanted to choose another group bc I already read some of the asks..... but ya know bts is my first and ultimate fave of all time so.... ITS BTS TIME!

1. Who was your first bias?

I was an OT7 stan! I just couldn't choose!

2. Who is your bias now?

With much help from my friend we came to the conclusion that Yoongi/suga is my bias. It was pretty obvious tbh, it just took me a while to acknowledge 🤣

3. What was the first MV you watched by them?

I'm not really sure but I think it was mic drop (Japanese ver.) Or BS&T (also Japanse ver.). Those were my religion! I watched it on an music app on my TV and they only had the Japanese versions of like 4 songs...

4. What’s your favourite MV?

DEFF Blood, Sweat & Tears! That MV was and still is, so ahead of it's time

5. If you could listen to one of their songs for the rest of your life, which would it be?

ARGH!!! That's such a hard question... okay I'll narrow it down! Dimple, House of cards, Home and Telepathy! There are so much more but I narrowed it down quite well 😅

6. Who would you want to see them collab with?

I don't know tbh.... I just love them on their own! It's always a pleasant surprise when they do have collabs and I love it! But maybe Billie Eilish or another kpop group, that'd be cool!

7. What (MV) concept do you want to see them do?

KSKDKDKDKWK They've done so many things already! And they vary so much. I did like BS&T very much so maybe more mythology stuff. BUT tbh I don't think that fits them anymore they've grown so much

8. Have you ever had a dream with any of the members in it?

SKSKSKSKSKW LOTS PROBABLY LMAO! I don't remember them except one! But that was because it felt so real! When I woke up I had to do a double take and I was so confused as to were I was and if I actually was alone in my room!

9. If you could spend the day with one member, who would it be and what would you do?

I would love to hang out with either Joon or Kook! Or both! With joon I'd love to go and explore, go to some museums or art galleries, maybe go cycling! I mean I am a Dutch person and we ride our bikes everywhere, everyday hahahaha. With kook it's either go on an adventure, do cool stuff like skydiving or some other cool adventures stuff or keep it on the down low and like play video games or go to an arcade or something😊

10. Which member do you think you would get on with best?

Aaahhh that's a hard question because I'm kind of a difficult person I guess. I want to say Jungkook because we're the closest in age (there's a 3 year gap which isn't that much and makes me believe we should be more on the same wave length) but I actually think it's either Hobi or Tae! Because I'm a really introverted person I need someone who will take me out of my comfort zone, but won't push it that much. Someone that'll make me feel like I belong. I'm very people shy and need at least 1 person that makes me feel comfortable in a group and I think it's either one of them! Idk what do you guys think?

11. Which member do you think you would argue with?

For some reason I think it would be Jimin? Idk why tho... lmao. I don't like arguing, I tend to avoid conflict so I don't really see myself arguing with someone.... but on the other hand like Jimin just popped up in my head when I thought about it so....🥴

12. If you had to let one member scroll through you tumblr, who would it be?

Ehhh... yeah like no... don't come near my tumblr, any of you... I feel like anyone of them would just look at me like I'm crazy 🥲 that's never gonna happen I just.... NO.... you guys tell me what the safest option would be bc I.... no just no

Tagging: @ssugadaddyy, @lucid-mins, @http-je0n, @tkklip, @taevolucion, @kittylefayy, @an-annyeoing-writer, @oheyura and anyone who sees it! Don't feel pressured to do so though, just have fun.

I saw a lot of new peeps in my followers list, I'm gonna be honest... I wanted to tagg yall but I'm scared you wouldn't like it 😅 so if you do want a tag next time hit me up, bc my anxious ass won't try lmao

[johannesviii]

Top 10 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2019

The last list, for now. It’s been a wild ride.

Not the best of these lists, but some really refreshing stuff charted that year, and what was good was super good. And also, here’s a barely elligible #1 that nobody seemed to care about for some reason.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

In 2019, my finger was fixed, I dropkicked depression in the garbage bin (with a little help from Eurovision because it was super good and full of hilarious shit), got married, and went on a roadtrip on Vancouver Island (BC, Canada), and that was my first real travel in 13 years. Met a lot of great people, seen amazing places, trees, bears and whales. And planes are also part of the adventure when you’re not used to them (you can watch movies on little screens from your seat now?? I had no idea. I watched so many movies). It was very exciting.

I also saw VNV Nation live in February, for the third time in six years. This time I had enough budget to buy a tshirt. I wasn’t expecting that concert to be even better than the previous two. At that point the new album had only been out for a couple of months and we still knew the lyrics of most of the new songs and Ronan’s face was constantly broadcasting a kind of “...........how” expression (face it guys, we like you. A lot). And they finished with All Of Our Sins and let me tell you, half the club was ready to start a revolution by the time that was over. Super intense.

Ok. 2019 albums! First, let’s talk about some negative things. Coldplay released Everyday Life at the end of the year. It was... uh. It was basically how I stopped loving their new stuff. That’s a very sad conclusion (for now) to this saga. This is exactly what I feared would have happened after Viva La Vida, aka them trying to go back to their earlier sound - except in the meantime we’ve got three fantastic albums with songs full of energy and joy. So I’m not too mad about this, just disappointed.

Within Temptation released Resist, and it wasn’t very good either, but I appreciated the general aesthetic of it. More SF-themed albums in symphonic metal, please. NF released The Search and while I’m still not a fan there’s a song on it that would have been #1 on this list if it had been elligible, so that’s something. And Carly Rae Jepsen released Dedicated and it was super good so why isn’t she getting new hits. Why. It feels unfair. Oh, and Avantasia made Moonglow and that’s the first time I’ve cared about their stuff in like a decade or so. Ghost In The Moon is super good, check it out.

But the big event of the year music-wise, as far as I’m concerned, was the return of two bands I thought we had lost forever. Of course My Chemical Romance reformed, but they don’t have new music yet, so the main event for this post is the return of Tool with Fear Inoculum. It’s not even their best album, but having a pretty good new Tool album in the year of our lord 2019 wasn’t at all something I was counting on. Of course, the hardcore fans are still as insufferable as ever (insert the “you need a pretty high IQ” copypasta here), but it didn’t spoil my enjoyment of it. Come on! Their first album in 13 years! 80 minutes of hypnotic heavy rhythms and weird shit, an album that trolled me when I opened it by playing a music video while I was looking somewhere else (yeah I jumped), and they even managed to land a track for one week on the US hot 100! Again, Tool! On the hot 100! in 2019! Unbelievable. Are we starting to return to the good timeline? I certainly hope so.

Unelligible songs, now. The Search by NF would have topped this list super easily. Might be one of the songs I listened to the most in 2019, actually. Now That I Found You by Carly Rae Jepsen, again, should have been a hit, and I beg you to watch this music video if you’ve never seen it. The 1975 released the super unexpected People, which was still good, and also Frail State of Mind. And most unexpected of all, three artists I didn’t care about at all teamed up and made absolute gold: I Think I’m OKAY, by Machine Gun Kelly, YUNGBLUD and Travis Barker. That would have been the second slot on this list if it had been elligible. Or maybe the first, even? Not sure. I’m just so happy this kind of angry but uplifting music is starting to become popular again. I just love everything about this song.

Here’s a short list of honorable mentions!

Roi (Bilal Hassani) - I don’t like this song a lot, but I do like it, I’m glad it was our song for the ESC 2019, and Bilal is a very nice and endearing person, and everyone who disrespects him on twitter is free to come fight me in the pit, where I’m still waiting with that tambourine from my 1992 list.

Con Calma (Daddy Yankee, Katy Perry, Snow) - You already know I liked the original Informer a lot, so I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t pleased to hear this clone of it on the radio.

Breathin’ (Ariana Grande) - Here’s the usual “if I had better taste this would be higher” honorable mention.

Summer Days (Martin Garrix) - In the absence of any new hit song from Macklemore this will do in a pinch.

Circles (Post Malone) - The fact that everyone seems to adore this and I’m over there saying “it’s ok I guess” probably means I will never love Post Malone nor understand the hype about him, and that’s okay, I can live with that.

High Hopes (Panic! At the Disco) - Still elligible. Still good but too borderline annoying to make the list.

How Do You Sleep (Sam Smith) - This year Sam Smith pulled a Viva La Vida and decided to stop making boring music all of a sudden and I’m LIVING FOR THIS. I certainly hope they continue in that direction.

And now, the list.

10 - La Grenade (Clara Luciani)

US: Not on the list / FR: #55

The only semi-filler on the list. I still like it a lot. Don’t have anything to say about it, though.

9 - Panini (Lil Nas X)

US: #40 / FR: Not on the list

Wasn’t too impressed by this at first and it took a while to grow on me, but the chorus is a nice little earworm, and “hey panini, don’t you be a meanie” has a tendency to pop in my head when I read hateful comments on the internet now. And Lil Nas X is just too endearing to be ignored. We’re so lucky to have someone who became famous so quickly and instantly decided to dress like a Jojo character and have the geekiest music videos possible and still be super nice and humble. We don’t deserve this guy.

8 - Dance Monkey (Tones And I)

US: Not on the list / FR: #6

I’m super glad the US are finally getting on the hype train in 2020 because this is a ton of fun. If the voice was juuuuuust a little less grating this would be even higher. Impossible to get it out of your head and somehow in this case that’s a good thing.

7 - Dancing With a Stranger (Sam Smith & Normani)

US: #14 / FR: Not on the list

As I said in the honorable mentions, Sam Smith pulled a Viva La Vida and decided to stop making boring music all of a sudden and I couldn’t be happier about that. This song is still a bit too calm for my taste most of the time, but when I’m in the right mood, it’s just fantastic.

Again, I hope Sam Smith continues in that direction, because if you had told me a couple of years ago that I would start to like their stuff one day, I would have laughed out loud.

6 - Bad Guy (Billie Eilish)

US: #4 / FR: #16

Duh.

I’m not as enthusiastic about When The Party’s Over as a ton of people are, mostly because, well, it’s a slow emotional song with little to no colour in it and by now you’re already aware I tend to have next to zero interest in that kind of songs. Bad Guy, on the other hand, is half hilarious half scary in equal doses, and even if I’m not super fond of the weird outro, it’s still a fantastic, weird as shit song, and I’m really glad Billie Eilish exists. Can’t wait to see where she goes from there.

I’m super glad this song didn’t come out when I was a teenager myself though. Come to think of it, I’m not sure I would have survived if the musical landscape from 16 years ago had been as depressed as it currently is. Thank god music is slowly getting more energetic again in 2020. Let’s stay on that track.

5 - Hey Look Ma I Made It (Panic! At The Disco)

US: #61 / FR: Not on the list

I follow several music critics on youtube and over the course of 2019, I’ve seen undiluted vitriol and hatred against this song (Spectrum Pulse even made a list of his “worst hit songs” of the decade and put this one at #10! TEN!!). And... I don’t really get where it’s coming from? Maybe I’m too literal-minded to see what the problem is with a sarcastic song saying “look I sold out and now I found success again! And it’s not that great!”. I just think it’s a lot of fun. Thank god Todd put it on his best list, at least we can agree on one thing for once.

It is hilarious that after putting so many Fall Out Boy songs on my lists, the one that I love the most from Panic! is the sellout song. Not sure why this was huge while the even better Say Amen wasn’t, though.

4 - Sunflower (Swae Lee & Post Malone)

US: #2 / FR: Not on the list

I usually don’t get the “chill” songs that tend to be successful these days but this one, unlike most Post Malone songs (bar Circles), has lovely pastel colors and a cloudy texture and it’s a really good vibe. It took several months to grow on me but it sure did.

In about ten years, people will listen to Sunflower and be submerged by nostalgia, mark my words.

3 - Old Town Road (Lil Nas X)

US: #1 / FR: #1 (see, everyone agrees for once)

Everyone on the planet already wrote a thinkpiece about this song and yet I’ve only seen maybe one out of five mentioning, just in passing, that the entire song is based on a Nine Inch Nail track from Ghosts I-IV, superbly re-used to make a weird and insanely catchy country hip hop song out of it. Ghosts has been one of my go-to albums to listen to while I’m painting for about ten years now. I’m saying all this because hearing a track from Ghosts on the radio for months was absolute bliss for me, especially in a new and improved version.

Thank you Lil Nas X for everything you’ve been doing and I wish you a long and successful career. You deserve it. I love this and I love you.

2 - Bury A Friend (Billie Eilish)

US: #73 / FR: Not on the list

Hello again, Billie Eilish.

This song is absolutely terrifying and that was before I even saw the music video. This is the soundtrack of your nightmares right there. I’m not even sure it deserves to be so high on the list, but frankly I’m too terrified to care. Maybe Old Town Road should be higher. I don’t know.

Also you have to know that when I’m super tired I go into echolalia mode and automatically repeat words or entire sentences that my brain considers interesting, like “potiron” (pumpkin) or “dramatique” ; and recently, my brain decided “when we all fall asleep, where do we go?”, sung exactly like it’s sung in this song, was its new favorite sentence. So. Hearing yourself saying that to an empty room while you’re drawing or folding clothes or cleaning plates is not a very pleasant experience, and it makes this song extra scary to me.

And now, here’s the last #1 of the last one of these lists (for now), and I’m glad to announce it closes this series of posts in a super fitting way.

Check this out. It’s so perfect in every way.

1 - Walk Me Home (Pink)

US: #99 / FR: Not on the list

Nobody seemed to care about this song over the course of 2019, and it's barely elligible, and I still have no idea why. The music reviewers I follow only either talked about it super briefly when it came out, or not at all. The rare ones who were making top 100s at the end of the year instead of top 10s usually put it somewhere in the middle of their lists. And yet it’s the elligible song I’ve listened to the most.

If you’ve been reading this series of posts for a while now, you probably already know exactly why it’s here, but here’s a quick recap.

The second album I ever bought in my life was Pink’s Missundaztood in 2002, and I loved her music a lot:

I was still really fond of her stuff in 2007:

Then she started to become less interesting and I basically ignored her apart from a brief blip on my radar in 2017:

Meanwhile, in 2012, fun. made some of the best songs of the entire decade before vanishing instantly, and I’ve been mourning them ever since:

And in the middle of last year, here I am, listening to the radio, and suddenly I hear something that sounds exactly like a fun. song, except I’ve never heard it before and it’s sung by a female singer, and, most importantly, it’s 2019 and fun. broke up more than six years earlier. And I’m like, what’s going on. This is so good. What the hell. What is this.

And I hear it a second time weeks later, and I google it, and I discovered that 1) it was Pink singing this, which made it my favorite Pink song in literally more than ten years, and 2) it was, indeed, written by one of the guys from fun., among other people who’s influence is less obvious.

I guess the main lesson from 2019, between newcomers making great music based on dead trends, old groups reforming, and this song, is that nothing’s gone forever, and things you used to enjoy can come back at the most unexpected time and in the most unexpected form.

There’s always, always gonna be new music to love, and it’s just a question of time.

Quick note

And with this, these lists are over... for now.

I don’t regret making them even if they were a ton of work, because that was super useful for a lot of different reasons.

They helped me get a better understanding of my own life’s chronology. That may sound stupid but I tend to link events to the music I was listening to at the time, and putting all that music in chronological order helped a lot.

I rediscovered a ton of songs I had completely forgotten about, and a lot of new ones. My playlist is much richer now and I’m happy about that.

I also discovered a few artists I knew nothing about.

It forced me to analyse two depressive episodes in my life and just because everything was now in exact chronological order, it accidentally helped me pinpoint what caused both of them. Better and cheaper than therapy. Impressive.

It made me realise how important some bands and artists had been in my life, and I relistened to some of their catalogue while making these lists. For some it was really obvious (Indochine, Placebo, Mylène Farmer, My Chemical Romance among some others), and for some others (Moby, Linkin Park, Mika in particular), it was a real surprise.

It made me realise that Placebo might have been huge in France but weirdly enough not that huge in the UK nor in the US. It’s especially striking when you look at their wikipedia page in English then in French and realise how detailed the French one is compared to the English one. Can’t believe Sleeping With Ghosts was a n°1 album here and basically nowhere else. That was the band where that discrepency was the most obvious but it wasn’t the only one like that. Really puts stuff in perspective.

It also helped me realise how cyclical popular music is. 1) trends tend to die near the end of every decade and the worst year is usually somewhere between the 8th and the 9th year. 2008 and 2018 tend to confirm this. 2) For the same reason, some new & interesting stuff appears at the beginning of every decade, and reaches its high point of quality between the 2nd and 4th year of the decade. 3) Basically I’m saying we’ve now passed the lowest musical quality in recent memory and 2022-2023 will have some exceptional music.

See you in December 2020. I have no doubt there’s a ton of great music coming up in the near future.

[sonodaten]

Microsoft E3 2019 Press Conference

Since I missed it, here’s a list of my reactions/thoughts

Overall rating: B-; lots of games, and you can’t ask for much more

Here we go Xbone let’s get on with the disappointment

Ooh we’re starting off with The Outer Worlds okay, Microsoft, okay!

A RELEASE DATE! OCTOBER 25 OF THIS YEAR! JUST FUCK ME UP!

I’m not interested in coop death matches but I can appreciate the aesthetic of Bleeding Edge. It’s very recognizable and a nice breath of fresh air from all these hyper realistic games

I think this is Ori? It looks like an Ori game.

IT IS! Not usually a fan of side-scrollers but I make an exception for Ori

Horror? I’m into it. (Please don’t be zombies).

Found footage? Missing child? DOGGO? I’M INTO IT

BULLET NO

IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO BULLET I WILL DESTROY MICROSOFT

The Blair Witch?

As in like The Blair Witch Project Blair Witch? THE Blair Witch?

I want to be excited for The Fallen Order but it’s just like . . .

Everything I’ve seen about it is so . . . uninteresting

At this point the only thing I’d buy the game for is Saw Gerrera and the beginnings of the Rebellion/other prominent Rebels that we never got to see during the movies/other games but are mentioned and (might) be featured in this one

Like at this point my faith in EA is wittled to nothing and I can only take solace in the face that their exclusive license with Disney is almost up and they probably won’t pursue a renewal THANK FUCK

OOH CD PROJEKT RED

CYBERPUNK INCOMING

SO FAR SO GOOD EVERYTHING LOOKS GOOD

It def looks cyberpunk, so let’s hope they actually get cyberpunk right

KEANU!?!?!?!?!

KEANU REEVES??? IN MY CYBERPUNK 2077????? IT’S APPARENTLY MORE LIKELY THAN I THOUGHT!

Now what would really make this game is a cameo by Harrison Ford

YES MR. REEVES I WOULD LIKE THE RELEASE DATE

RELEASING DURING 4/20 I’M SHITTING

I feel bad for whatever the fuck has to follow that up

Oh wait this is cute

I like the art style and the world is interesting just from the first look

Spiritfarer is a Good Game

Battletoads, huh?

*Wright hides himself in the trash can* Oh, mood

That actually looks really cute and I like the really distinctive art style

Some of these games actually look really cool. I love the different art styles and genres

Tbh the only reason I watch the Microsoft conference is bc I have a Windows 10 PC

Ooh I might start playing Halo again

Oh live-service game? Nvm. I’m tapping out on Game Pass.

Ooh new game

Is this a fuckign . . . airport simulator?????

Ah, nvm, just an airplane simulator. My bad.

A fuckign . . . re-release of Age of Empires?

I think I played the first one and didn’t like it. Was Age of Empires II better?

The entire tone of this is so funny

WASTELAND 3???

I LOVED WASTELAND 2 WAIT WHAT

BOOTY?????????????????????????????????

Oh fuck they got Double Fine

Is Xbox the gamer version of Disney?

PSYCHONAUTS 2???????????????????????

I HEAR STAR WARS

LEGO STAR WARS?

OH FUCK IT’S GONNA HAVE EPISODE IX ON THERE?

A game endorsed by Akira himself? Oh, it’s gotta be good.

Dude I still get goosebumps when I see Goku transform for the first time

Dragon Ball Z: Kakarot OH THAT’S THE GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE

What’s with all the time loop games recently? I mean I love it, but it’s just weird they’re all happening at once

I love how the chat immediately reverts to an endless cascade of “gay game” once anything that’s not a hypergonadal male on screen

Like bitch it’s Pride I hate to break it to you but that makes all the games shown here gay

Video Games are Gay Culture and You Gotta Deal With It

Anyway it looks great and I’m gonna get it

This is . . . Gears of War, right?

Billie Eilish yeah?

Oh fuck have there really been five Gears games?

Who’s gonna pop out of the stage??

No one I guess

Oh they doing the elite controllers again?

Not really interested in Dying Light 2, but it seems cool

These lego cars are the best thing to happen to Forza ever

Fuckign pop vinyls I’m crying

Ah yes more zombies. Just what we need.

SEGA here we go

WAIT THIS CAN’T BE

OH MY FUCKING GOD I’M ACTUALLY GOING TO CRY

PHANTASY STAR ONLINE 2 I’M FUCKING GOD

Idk what Crossfire is and I’m not that interested in it

Okay liking this design

Everything’s a lie bitch, let’s get you some fruit

What kind of Utena rip off was that move

OH FUCK IT’S ANOTHER TALES GAME???? FINALLY

One thing you can always count on for the Borderlands games is good fun and Borderlands 3 looks like good fun

Oh fuck September? I figured it’s be out in 2020

UM GRRM????

Elden Ring looks really cool and I’m excited to learn more about it

Idk why everyone thinks game streaming is a good idea when a good portion of the world doesn’t even have internet access but go off I guess

The only thing I wanna see is what’s gonna be called

Me, watching Xbox try to hype up a console that will, at most, earn about 20% of the game market: Weird flex, but okay

“Xbox is all about choice” yeah and it’s usually people choosing Sony and Nintendo over Xbox

“Most immersive console experience ever” . . . until the PS5 drops but yeah

Are we gonna see what it looks like or what?

Oh so no name just “Project Scarlett”

It’s a cool project name

Halo at launch is an . . . interesting call to make, considering the series recent reception

Oh fuck they pulled a Thor Infinity War with Master Chief

GIVE MASTER CHIEF A BOOTY YOU COWARDS

Oh thank fuck it’s finally over

Overall rating: B-

Showed a lot of games, so you can’t really ask for much more in a conference. Not a whole lot of exclusives shown, which isn’t going to help Microsoft in the long run, especially considering we’re on the verge of a console generation. The only thing that really wowed me was the news of Phantasy Star Online 2 finally coming to the West, and I’m assuming while it’ll only be on Xbox One now it’ll probably migrate to PC and possibly other consoles in the future and I’ve waited this long, I’m willing to wait more.