#the irony is that i'm doing this on mobile

[lindwurmkai]

The best thing about Pillowfort is that you can make a single good post and two weeks later you will still be getting a steady influx of likes despite having very few followers, and it does not require some popular user to reblog your post. All you have to do is reblog it to a community yourself.

I imagine by now the majority of those likes are coming from people who haven't been on PF in a while (or recently signed up, or only just found the community in question), either catching up on a very slow dash so that they're actually seeing posts from two weeks ago (lol) or, more likely, visiting the community page directly.

Pillowfort users are also very good at linking to posts for context anytime they happen to mention them anywhere (even in comments)! So that's another (secret) source of fresh views in some cases. :)

[anzus-domain]

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆  +  MORONIC IRONY ! a single muse doc tailored for in-depth              character exploration

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ hello guys, I'm back from my long silence once more to bring you a new doc ! this one is yet again short, but i promise i have a longer temp in store for you guys. this template was made in preparation for an upcoming server called THE COLOR GREEN. it will most likely be here this summer & I can't wait to see it. in other news, discord has gone through a major update so my user has changed to melchotic. ✦  𝖡𝖱𝖤𝖠𝖪𝗗𝗢𝗪𝗡 ・ this doc utilizes a custom sizing plugin, this will be linked down below for everyone to make use of. ( the measurements are 12 x 8 ) ・ no highlighted comments even though there are an abundance of drawings. i do want to stress that everything is able to be edited to your hearts content. if you need to replace some things for your own use, I urge you to do so.

・ as always, the colors for the images have been edited in pics art, but everything can be made to look the way you want it to. ✦  𝗣𝗟𝗨𝗚𝗜𝗡

· the plugin is linked above and i highly recommend that you guys add it to your browser if you wish to change the color of this doc & others on pc instead of mobile. the plugin is compatible with safari, but I believe you have to install it on google chrome first as it works just fine for me on safari :) · thank you guys for always supporting me ! reblogs, likes, etc are always appreciated. do not be afraid to dm me if this doc gives you trouble, i'm also open to any questions you may have so don't be afraid to ask on my page. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2024: #15

15. AUSTRIA Kaleen - "We will rave" 25th place

Decade Ranking: 50/153 [Above Systur, below Lesley Roy]

WHEN THE DARKNESS HITS AND WE CAN'T BE SAVED

WIRAM WI DAM DAM DA WE WILL RAVE

Fucking AMAZING chorus. At this stage of the ranking, I don't really give too many shits about the flaws in the product. And that's for the best because Holy Hell Kaleen that was NOOOOOOOT GOOOOOOOD (objectively). Fortunately it was still very entertaining (also objectively?), so.

Also at this point, you may expect some real emotional investment from my part and Kaleen is clear example of that too. SHE, more than anyone else, was the uncrowned queen of Millennial Monroehood this year. Not only did she provide a fucking BANGER from the time I was a middleschooler, she also SERVED:

LOOKS

PERSONALITY

POISE

JE NE SAIS QUOI

ATTITUDE

and also NONE OF THE VOCALS. 😍 😍 😍

And this comes on top of her song being leaked two months in advance off Marvin Dietmann's laptop, and becoming a viral hit among millennial eurotwitter BEFORE its full release ♥ (and I fully buy into the conspiracy theory that the leak was intentional to build hype.)

But yeah, this performance was heavily flawed, I won't deny that. "We will rave" is a great song and it's only 15th on my ranking, that's how far south that went.

It is equal parts comical and tragic that Marvin Dietmann arranged for his PARTNER (I assumed "business partner" at first, but apparently also partner in a domestic sense? Yeah I'm as surprised as you are that he likes the clam.) to be cast for Eurovision and then failed to provide staging for her that capitalized on her strengths.

Kaleen is a professional dancer and dance instructor.

She runs Marvin's Dance School FOR HIM, FOR A LIVING.

The leak showed a vibrant dance choreography that allowed her to (barely) provide passable vocals.

She's a natural born performer of the ~rhythmic arts~

So what does Marvin do?

HE REDUCES HER DANCE ROUTINE TO THE TYPE OF TARD DANCE ANYONE CAN EXECUTE.

HAS HER WALK AROUND THE STAGE. NOT DANCE. WALK.

AND HAD HER DANCERS SHIMMY HER AROUND IN LIEU OF A DANCE BREAK.

ALL SO THAT SHE CAN DELIVER THE BEST VOCAL PERFORMANCE... WHICH IS... WORSE THAN IN THE DEMO BECAUSE UM HELLO EARTH-TO-MARVIN:

YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS A DANCER, AND NOT A SINGER.

And all of that, I mean I'm sorry, is fucking hilarious, foremost. I know the live was "bad" but god it was really good at being bad. Casting your girlfriend and then FAILING to take her skillset (anything involving movement) into account is so uproariously funny to me. The staging was not bad on paper (it tried to increase momentum via the lasers and looks good if you mute), but it featured a slow, aenemic choreography that couldn't keep up with the music's light speed pace. That same dichotomy killed Halo, killed Edgar and almost killed "We Will Rave" too. This is the choreo you'd give to someone who cannot dance either due to being a block of wood (Dons) or old (Meri Bas.).

Even Firefighter, which is a fucking abortive attempt at a "dance song", had more tempo and life and let Nutsa (who is NOT a dancer) perform a break by herself. Christ Marvin.

(Granted it may be the outfit that forced Kaleen to perform a pantomime rather than a dance, but if that's the case... change the outfit? If those boots restrict your mobility, then don't wear them AT ALL, you know?)

However, as much as my appreciation for the live is based on irony and schadenfreude, I also just really love the song that much. "We will rave" is the best written girlbanger of this year - catchy, infectuous, smoking hot, and a wonderful throwback to the good Flemish techno of the early aughts. It's such a fucking banger in the style of Milk Inc, Lasgo, X Session, Touch of Joy, 2Fabiola, etc.

The prechorus and lyrics are delectable, and Kaleen is, despite her vocal inaccuracies, a charming hostess and style icon. Her personality is the saving grace of this live performance and the reason why I still embrace it in the face of its many mistakes. As disrespectful as Marvin's choreography was, she was flawless in its execution. SHE is what turns "We Will Rave" into a ride. The choreo and the results both did her dirty, but eh. Someone had to finish near the bottom. This year, that was Austria.

Now SAVOUR this last ever instance of them being fun in Eurovision because they'll only send salvaduncans from hereonout. If Eurovision isn't cancelled first, of course.

THE RANKING

[qberryshortcake]

Are you wondering how to get into Gundam and need an autistic transbian with insomnia to help guide you? Well you're in fucking luck!

Happy for u tho/I'm sorry

Start with either Witch From Mercury, Iron Blooded Orphans, or Mobile Suit Gundam. All three you can go in blind and have a grand old time. WFM is the lesbian one though, and my proper intro to the franchise.

What even is a Gundam?

Let's get a little vocabulary out of the way. A Mobile Suit is a bipedal giant mech, generally with one pilot, that uses a combination of mounted weapons and weapons held in the mobile suit's hands. This can be railguns, tank cannons, missile launchers, or a good old fashioned energy sword.

Are all mobile suits Gundams?

No, actually! It's a poodles/dogs situation. All Gundams are mobile suits, but not all mobile suits are Gundams.

What makes Gundams special?

It varies from series to series. In some it's that they use a special power source. In others it's a direct interface with its users. They often require less training than other mobile suits, and have a much higher skill ceiling. No matter what, one rule is more or less universal: only a Gundam can beat another Gundam. This is one of the driving forces for every antagonist. It's also why these shows get so heady.

Who is Char Aznabke?

The antagonist of Mobile Suit Gundam (see below). He's iconic, charismatic, stylish, and machiavellian. There is a Char in every Gundam spinoff. It gives you a sense of dramatic irony knowing that, because if nobody is wearing the mask, you're trying to figure out who will. And if somebody is, you're wondering what they'll do.

Okay, where do I start?

Let's bring out the timeline chart (bear with me):

This may seem intimidating at first, but once you break it down, it starts to become a bit more scrutable.

The first thing to understand is that Gundam has a singular canon timeline, the Universal Century, and the rest are spinoffs. You could theoretically start down any of these timelines and have a grand old time. That being said, some starting points are better than others.

Universal Century - if you're down with old animation, you can't go wrong with watching the original Mobile Suit Gundam! You can start with Gundam Origin to learn about Char Aznable's backstory, or jump straight into the original anime

Future Century - This is one of the weirdest wildest Gundam series with Mobile Fighter G Gundam. I haven't seen this one and I personally wouldn't start here? But hey if you want a giant robot tournament where every country has a themed Gundam that has sliiiiight racist vibes? Uh well then this is truly one of the shows in all of Gundam.

After Colony - This is where a lot of us originally bounced off of the series. Gundam Wing was what was on Toonami back in the day. The dub isn't...great, and the story is *extremely* edgy. That being said is is rife with ship bait and Deathscythe is an incredible Gundam design. All the same themes, just very hamhanded.

Correct Century - this takes place in the far far future, and technically the previous three timelines converge on this one. It's so far in the future that Gundams are practically a myth. This is Turn A Gundam, or as it's usually stylized, Ɐ Gundam. I haven't gotten to this one yet, but I love the moustachio'd design of the titular Ɐ Gundam. I wouldn't necessarily start here, just because this one kind of assumes the viewer has seen at least a Gundam before. From what I've heard at least.

Cosmic Era - While I own several gunpla from this series, I have only seen an episode! It's... I've never heard a single good word about this one. As far as I know it is more geared toward younger viewers, which also means it is the most shamelessly about advertising gunpla...well other than a couple other series we'll get to.

Anno Domini - okay here is where it gets a little odd because there's multiple timelines that use this abbreviation. The first is Gundam 00, or Double O (not zero). This one is really fun. It takes the edge from Wing and makes it kind of humorous. A slow burn, where you realize that maybe a single force having a monopoly on violence, made up entirely of child soldiers is,,,not the best idea? Great place to start.

Anno Domini - Gundam Build Fighters and Mobile Suit Gunpla Raiders G are, charitably, celebrations of the gunpla hobby. I wouldn't start here.

Post Disaster - God I almost wish this had been my first series. Iron Blooded Orphans is about a bunch of dudes being guys. They escape from slavery and go into business for themselves, and get embroiled in a political conflict while escorting a princess back to Earth from Mars. Fantastic show, but it clocks in at 50 episodes, so keep that in mind if you start this one.

Ad Stella - this is where I started. Witch from Mercury is absolutely incredible. Just 26 episodes. It follows Suletta Mercury and Miorine Rembran, after the former wins a duel, and due to sci fi anime logic, becomes betrothed to the latter.

Great, anything else I should know?

I said this in another post but if you're still on the fence because giant robot shows you've seen in the past haven't been great, I get it. I was the same way. The point of the robots being humanoid is because it takes out the abstraction of using vehicles of war, without cutting down on the scale of the wars being fought. When a character, for example, goes to destroy a military base single-handedly, you get that disconnect.

Sure it's a pilot doing war things, but it's *very* different when your opponents are as outclassed as most things and a Gundam.

It's always been about the horrors of war, the victims of those wars, and the wounds and scars that are left on the soldiers of those wars. The cool robot is so that a character can lose an arm but still have to keep fighting. In some series that character may have felt the pain of losing an arm while jacked into their mobile suit. It brings a viscerality that fighting with planes, tanks, and starships simply wouldn't be able to replicate.

Oh. And uh. Gunpla. Gunpla are the Namco Bandai line of models. They all require minimal tools and no glue. They're generally posable and some are extremely posable. They come in 1:144, 1:100, and 1:60 scale (primarily). They're also not cheap. The smaller models cost around 30-50, but they get expensive quickly. So uh. Don't? Get into them?

[definitely-not-a-lucifer-clone]

Not every day I turn to an NHP for advice, but fuck it, I'll bite.

Callsign Angel speaking; yes, I'm well aware of the inherent irony here. Never mind that. I'm here to ask for some recommendations on how to play nice with my squadmate who won't (can't?) stop slagging her Tokugawa every other deployment because, and I quote, "heat sinks can bite my shiny metal ass".

Her LL6 Toku build is based off one of your suggestions I think; uses a even split of Toku and Nelson licenses. Likes to go fast and overheat faster. I'm working with a LL6 Dusk Wing; pretty standard high-mobility sniper build with a variety of HOR_0S tech systems (Kobold, Minotaur, and Goblin) for when idiots get too close (or go the wrong direction, which is anywhere out of my line of sight).

Any advice on how to stay clear of a Toku's danger zone range and still be an effective hologram bomb sniper? High mobility helps, obviously, but with all the burn she's pumping out I can't help but feel more than a bit threatened in her airspace.

-- Angel

HELLO ANGEL! SEEKING ME OUT MAY FEEL IRONIC BUT I'VE MET AND BEFRIENDED MANY AN ANGEL IN MY DAY. THO I'VE BEEN TOLD THAT AFTER THEY MEET ME, THEY DON'T STAY ANGELS FOR VERY LONG!

KIDDING, KIDDING, JUST WHAT THE KIDS THESE DAYS CALL A LITTLE HUMOR.

THE SHORT ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION: YOU BOTH HAVE HIGH MOBILITY AND OPERATE AT DIFFERENT RANGES WITH DIFFERENT TACTICS, THIS IS IN FACT A MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL RELATIONSHIP. LONG ANSWER: YOU HAVE EVERY SNIPER'S DREAM: A GIANT FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE TO IGNORE DISTRACTION BETWEEN YOU AND THE THINGS YOU WANT TO SHOOT. THINK OF IT THIS WAY: YOU'RE SOME MERC. SUDDENLY, THERE ARE LANCERS. ONE APPEARS TO BE JUST A FLOATING GUY. THE OTHER IS A FUCKING FIREBALL THAT IS COMING RIGHT FOR YOU. WHICH DO YOU DEAL WITH FIRST?

IT'S THE FIREBALL, DUH. PLAY INTO THIS! AT THE START OF FIGHTS, ACT VERY SUBTLY. BOLSTER ALLIES, PERHAPS SOME TECH ATTACKS, APPLY LOCK ON, TURN INVISIBLE, DO WHATEVER IT IS YOU SNEAKY TYPES DO, THAT SORT OF STUFF. LET YOUR ALLY DRAW THE HEAT - LITERALLY AND METAPHORICALLY - WHILE YOU HANG BACK AND TAKE POT SHOTS AND DROP ENEMIES.

YOU CAN USE YOUR HORUS TRICKERY TO PUSH ENEMIES TOWARDS YOUR ALLY, KEEPING THEM WITHIN THREAT RANGE OF WHAT IS VERY CLEARLY A DANGEROUS MELEE BUILD.

HELL, TURN YOUR ALLY INVISIBLE. DO YOU KNOW HOW DANGEROUS AN INVISIBLE NELSONGAWA IS? THAT'S LIKE FIRE YOU CAN'T SEE AND IS COMING RIGHT FUCKING FOR YOU. I CHECKED WITH AN ATHENA CLONE I SOMETIMES PLAY POKER WITH (THIS IS A BAD IDEA IF YOU WANT TO EVER WIN BTW), AND THIS IS THE 1329245912TH MOST DANGEROUS THING POSSIBLE, WHICH GIVEN HOW MANY THINGS ARE POSSIBLE IS PRETTY FUCKING DANGEROUS.

ESSENTIALLY DO NOT THINK OF YOURSELVES AS TWO ENTITIES WITH DIFFERING GOALS; YOU ARE A TEAM, AND HAVE GREAT POTENTIAL TO HELP EACH OTHER. TOGETHER YOU CAN ENABLE THE WORST BEST IN EACH OTHER, AND ACCOMPLISH SOMETHING TRULY GLORIOUS.

NOW GET OUT THERE AND DETHRONE GOD KICK SOME ASS!

[bonefall]

I wanted to ask something queer because it’s pride month but I can’t think of anything… do you have any queer bb rewrite stuff to talk about?

HERE, have a queer jumble of a bunch of the gay changes in BB;

As far back as DOTC, Thunder Storm was transmasc. His childhood best friend is also his lover; Lightning Cry.

There is a third gender in Clan Culture; Meewa. Gray Wing was Meewa and to this day, the role is associated with parenthood and wisdom.

Bumble and Turtle Heart were mates.

The Clanmew parental terms are decoupled from gender; the Mi is the primary parent, a Ba is a secondary.

For an example; Breezepelt is the Mi of his litters, Harestar and Heathertail were both Ba.

In Clanmew, Harestar had so many Ys in his warrior name (Yywayayiaoyyr) that Breezepelt got the kits to call him Yya.

Bluestar was queer. She had strange relationships with almost everything personal, but the only thing that matters is how much she LOVED her friends and how far she would go for them

The entire Forget-me-not friend group was queer in some ways.

And Bluestar’s friend Rosetail, turns out she's aromantic!

She loves romance, matchmaking, but eventually realized she doesn't like being in one. She just likes the idea a lot.

So of course Thistleclaw was PISSED when his sister claimed Queen’s Rights and adamantly refused to name a father.

She matched up her son Redtail with Runningwind, I like to think she was a very "when am i getting grandkits" kind of mom

Redtail was trans, but also gave birth to his children. That was Sandstorm and Longtail.

Redtail's transness was why Bluestar gave Dustpaw to him, she could see that Dust was working something out and hoped that Red would help

Dustpelt is genderqueer! He doesn't conform to the expectations of toms for his society; construction is largely a molly activity.

One-eye was a legendary builder in her time. It was a high honor when she came out of retirement to mentor him, when she was nearly 20 years old no less!

Cinderpelt was a lesbian, but there wasn't really anyone in the Clan she was interested in. Meh.

I do want to write a little scene where she goes to BloodClan to learn about mobility devices to help Wildfur, and has an AWOOGA moment at Cody

Leafpool and Mothwing are in love with each other, and look forward to every meeting. But they serve their Clans above all. The yearning.

I am very partial to Daisy x Squirrelflight, loooong in the future, after Squirrelflight has found fulfillment in her family and mentorships.

Conversely the untapped potential of Spiderleg x Bramblestar is unmatched. Nightmare husbands, this is the funniest thing I've ever heard of

Heartbreaking! the worst people you know have gotten gay married

Brokenstar and Runningnose were so gay I don't even have words for it, there's homosexual and then there's whatever the hell is going on over there

"My childhood best friend is a manifested curse and I would do anything for him, so I dedicated my whole life to becoming a more ruthless and brutal asset to serve his wants and desires, rejecting the stars and walking into the netherworld with glee, and only finding that it is hell because he isn't there. When you look between us, it's impossible to tell which of us was the monster, and which was the man, and yet I have never made a choice that I wouldn't make again."

Blackstar was aromantic! Russetfur was his lifelong best friend and partner, her death devastated him

He had flings and friends with benefits, though. Specifically, he's homosexual/aromantic.

Russetfur was gay too, I'm not sure if she ever had a wife though

I haven't drawn her yet but I see her as butch. Also she had large eyebrows.

Rowanclaw, honor sired for Newtspeck, was transtom

His apprentice, Talonclaw, survived the mauling because Smokefall did not die in the mountain this time around! They had a summer wedding

Irony struck when Rowan's kid Tigerheart also ended up being trans, but transmolly

Funny coincidence that everyone around Rowan ends up being queer

Tigerheart, who later becomes Heartstar, was in love with Dovewing from the moment they were apprentices on the Beaver Quest, before she even hatched

Dovewing dated Bumblestripe, even choosing him and ThunderClan over the instability of running off with Tigerheart

But when she got pregnant she SKEDADDLED

Lightleap and Shadowsight are biologically Bumble's, but Heartstar adopted them immediately

Heartstar is incredibly smug about this. "My wife. My kids. Cry about it"

Ivypool went through something similar, in a pretty bad relationship with Blossomfall and eventually getting with Fernsong

Only Fernsong is NOT smug, he's an ex-kittypet who joined during ThunderClan's Tempest and BOY HOWDY did he not want to make waves

But now he's dating the deputy's grandchild (thru Lionblaze), has an angry Blossomfall on his ass, and.... it's worth it lmao, have you seen his wife? Marvelous

He is the Mi of the children, this is the life for him

Thriftear and Plumstone are gay

Over in RiverClan, Hawkfrost and Reedwhisker were an item and were going to get serious... but then, well. Hawkfrost went through TNP and ended up dead.

In SkyClan, Violetshine, Dragonfly, and Tree are a polycule

I'm not quite sure what's going on with Echosong, Leafstar, and Billystorm. But Leaf and Billy are together, and I think Leaf has a thing with Echo. But Echo and Billy are not together, and Echo isn't involved with the kittens.

This isn't a queer thing but Sharptooth's wife Cherrytail was spayed. I think Hawkwing and co were surrogated by Echosong, but I'm not sure yet

But I do know that Cherry did not birth those kittens

Over in WindClan, I combined Jake and Sparrow into one character. Tallstar’s Collapse is reworked into Talltail traveling around with him and his group, until ultimately, he realizes it's not that easy to leave his Clan behind

I want to approach it as a tragedy, that he couldn't stay somewhere he was truly loved and happy

He was raising kids with Jake, two orphans they found. One of them followed him, even though he tried to tell him to stay with Jake and his sibling

That kid becomes Flytail, and then Flylight as an honor title

Sunstrike and Furzepelt are gay, and Furze is going to be an AVOS save thanks to Brushblaze, Breezepelt, Harestar, Heathertail, Crowfeather, and two more cats I haven't picked yet

Speaking of Brushblaze, Leo is an ex-BloodClan trader who joined WindClan to be with Onewhisker

It fell apart and he's been bitter about it ever since

Onestar is a disaaaaaaaster

He had a fling with Firestar before Fire realized he was aromantic, and it never would have worked anyway since Firestar was leading a clan

He always had an excuse for why he wasn't doing PDA with Brush, but while he was going through apprenticeship (despite being a qualified adult cat, very frustrating) Onewhisker was seeing Smoke

I kinda just want to remove Onewhisker having Whitetail as a mate entirely, I already fixed the apprenticeship thing but I kinda just like him having someone honor dam for him and he raised Heathertail alone

And lastly, Firestar

Firestar is totally aromantic.

He honor sired Sandstorm's kittens and raised them with her, because she is a deeply reliable friend and ally. They're in a QPR!

There's definitely a couple I missed (toadnettlepool, Sedgecreek x Greenflower) but that's enough for now

[winters-mistress]

brave girl, sweet girl

"Come here," Geralt murmurs to the girl, running his fingers through her knotted hair as she gets up without complaint from her vigil against his side. She goes to him without giving lip for him telling her what to do, reaching her arms out before she remembers the state he's in.

"Are-are you sure?" Ciri's voice cracks, she's so tired, and the look in her eyes makes his chest ache. "You're hurt still, and I'm-"

She silences as he grabs her wrist and pulls her towards him. She follows silently, moving where he moves her.

"Wouldn't've said if I wasn't." Geralt murmurs. "Come here, little dove."

Ciri allows herself to be pulled onto his lap, sniffling as he lets out a small grunt at her weight upon his injured body, but he still pulls her so she's laying down on top of him.

Yennefer had told him that a lot of Cirilla's magic was subconscious after they had been delivered to Thanedd, and that proves true as as soon as the little blonde was upon him, her presence is like a soothing salve. A coolness overtakes his body as his girl clings to him, the raging scream of hot pain that hadn't evaded since Vilgefortz calming into a quiet lul as the longer he holds the girl, the less pain he feels. In his body and in his heart, as his neck becomes wet with her tears.

"Shh, pup. 'M here." He can't speak more than that, closing his eyes in relied as the beautiful magic takes his pain until he feels nothing at all, blissful nothingness after such a long time of pain. The girl shakes with her despair, and he settles his arms around her despite everything.

"I was so scared when I saw you fall, saw Yennefer fall because of him." she whispers, her own pain clear in her voice. Even Ciri herself is unaware of the soothing balm her presence and magic causes her father surprise, it seems. Subconscious, indeed. "He broke your backs, a cruel irony, left you for dead if Tross hadn't-"

Her words stop and she clings to him just as he does her.

"I'm here, sweet girl. Still here."

He wants to gain enough mobility to roll them over so he can hold her properly, but as much as the salve soothes, his bones are not healed. No pain, but no healing. Jaskier will swap with Cirilla in the morning for their separate vigils over them both, and he'll tell the bard that he needs the injured sorceress who rests in the hut next to his own to teach Cirilla whatever healing spells she knows so they can all move on from this. Yen's own magic fails her now, presumably because of her broken body from their failed attempt at subduing Vilgefortz.

He aches to know what happened after Cirilla ran from the three of them.

"What-what did you do? To him, to stop him?" his voice is harsh. Cirilla sniffles, leaning up to pluck a small wooden cup from his small wooden table. It's moist, not a proper cup, just a hollowed out chunk of wood.

He drinks the water she offers, blinking ad her hand wipes away the drips running from his mouth, before he pulls her back to him. The magic salve, the feeling of her safe in his arms after watching the bastard run towards her as he and Yen lay helpless on the beach, they soothe him in equal measure.

"Ran into Tor Lara, there was this presence there that helped me, and everything made so much sense in those few minutes that I didn't want to leave. Easy, manageable. He followed me, stalked me up the stairs, but it wasn't scary. I wasn't afraid of him, of me, of anything, because everything I've ever done, ever could do, it was so easy, it made so much sense-" good thing it made sense to the child, because she's confusing him now, what an oxymoron "Uh, I needed to escape, and he was there. Tried to get me, convince me that he was right, grabbed me, but that light overtook us, and I came flying down in the sky. But it wasn't the fall that hurt, it was the landing. It's always the landing, and my souvenir was helpful enough-" they both look at the severed head of the dicietful mage that's laying in the corner. "Uh, yeah. Found you, Jaskier and Yennefer. He's gone, you two will heal in time. Then we figure out what the fuck to do next." Ciri lists nervously, holing down in his arms as her story comes to an end. Geralt's relieved that the prick hadn't touched her, hadn't harmed her, because for all of his cruelty on the beach, he expected him to go flying at the kid with that fucking staff and end the world there and then.

Ciri's touch is gentle as she holds him in return, his arms tightening. Ironic, really, that his arms weren't really hurt in that pathetic fight he'd put up against Vilgefortz. But all the tenseness leaves him when he feels a tiny hand om his slick black tunic. Slick with blood and sweat from days of being on his skin.

"You're safe, you're okay, we're okay." He murmurs.

The girl leans again, reaching towards the shattered leg.

"Does it hurt?" Her voice is gentle, soft. He forgets sometimes, how utterly young she is. For all of her strength and bravery and resilience and power, she's still just a kid.

"Not anymore." He rasps, flexing hid fingers around her, a silent come back. He wants to hold her, soothe her, as she's doing for him, even as subconscious as it is.

Her fingertips are small as they touch just above his injured leg. He makes a sound at the back of his throat as the horrid feeling slips away, giving way to a glorious lack of pain. It's not numb, it's not healed, but the lack of discomfort is heavenly.

"So you do know you're doing it." He rumbles, pulling her back into his arms. She follows willingly, hiding from the world in his neck and chest.

"Sometimes, not all the time." she admits. "Glad something I do in that sense actually works. I'm useless at everything else." she chuckles bitterly, and the self depreciating ways she's inherited from him and his bretherin makes him ache again.

"Don't talk about yourself that way." He admonished. "You've had what, three months of lessons? And you've already beaten a God. Give yourself some credit, little dove."

"Not me, whatever it was did that."

"It was. You might not have been through mutation, but you've done the witcher profession proud, taking out a monster like that." He says, pushing her hair from her face.

She snorts. "Would like you to tell Vesemir or Lambert that. They'd have a colliption."

His chest rumbles with amusement. "It'll be our first stop out of here."

[come-along-pond]

notes: My second box for the @occreatorexchange prompt bingo. This is my first full published smut so uh, please be kind. We can thank @curious-kittens-ocs, @astarionbae and @endless-oc-creations for dealing with my complaining and begging for peer review.

warnings: NSFW. Swearing, kissing, fingering, p in v, no protection, kitchen sex, titty sucking, edging, scratching and leaving marks. Bruce says 'good girl' because I'm a slut. IF YOU HATE THE WORD TITS DON’T READ.

Isabella Wayne (OC) x Bruce Wayne: MaleDom

AO3 VERSION

“Harls I love you, I do, but I can not listen to the same story for the fifth time,” Isabella Wayne is standing outside her apartment, keys in one hand, her mobile in the other, pressed to her ear. Harley had been talking her ear off nonstop ever since she’d left the Grocery Store - ‘Gotham’s a scary place Izzie, you gotta stay safe’, she didn’t realise the irony in that.

Bella pushes open her door, not expecting to see the lights already on, she has a moment of panic before she sees a familiar silhouette leaning on her kitchen counter. 

She doesn’t acknowledge him, merely continuing to listen to the woman on the other side of the phone, and placing her shopping bag on the kitchen island, she starts to unpack and places two wine bottles down, the figure picks one up and inspects it, almost disgusted by the cheap alcohol.

“As entertaining as you are darling, I’m going to go drown myself in the bath with a bottle of wine,”

“You’re so rich,” she can feel Harley’s eye roll. 

“Bye,” Isabella sings her farewells and hangs up, placing her phone on the counter, “I thought you of all people would be against breaking and entering,”

“I didn’t break anything, just entered,” Isabella’s husband shrugs “Who was that,” he gestures to her phone

“Oh don’t be jealous Brucie, she’s just a friend,” Bella winks and Bruce sighs

“Isabella-“

“You keep enough tabs on me Bruce, you could find out very easily,” she grumbles, opening the fridge to put away her small carton of milk.

“I thought maybe I’d give you a chance to be honest for once,” that stung, he knew it did and Bella turns away from him.

“Am I not allowed friends? Am I supposed to be imprisoned in my apartment, only seeing you and business associates, you don’t even look at me properly anymore,”

“I do,” he says firmly, but there’s something underlying like it’s something to be ashamed of “I’m sorry…” This happened a lot, he’d come over, and they’d bite at each other until someone cracked Bella sighs and joins him by the counter, crossing her arms and mirroring his position.

A moment passes, then another.

“It was Harley,”

“I know,” of course he did

“Why are you here Bruce?” Isabella asks, she looks up at the taller man, his jaw was as sharp as ever, but his stubble had grown past his old limit. 

It takes him a minute to respond, battling with his thoughts, he tries to remember Isabella before Belle Reve, her kind eyes and calm demeanour, they were honest with each other then, or so he thought.

“I missed you,” he admits, placing his palms behind him.

“Me too,” she says quietly, looking right up at him, she places her hand on top of his and finally he turns to look at her, to properly look at her.

He isn’t sure how to feel about what he finds: she was still her with long blonde hair and determined brown eyes. She was still her.

He thinks maybe his life would be easier if she wasn’t. 

“I still love you,”

“I know, me too,” with her response, Bruce cups his wife’s cheeks and pulls her in for a kiss. She responds instantly, moaning when he spins her around and pushes her against the kitchen island, his hands slip down her back and into her jeans, grabbing at the flesh of her ass while she grabs his arms for support.

“Bedroom?” she asks breathlessly, god he’d barely touched her and she needed him, in her defence, it’d been over a year since they’d been together.

Bruce pulls back, and looks her in the eyes “Are you sure?” she nods “Words sweetheart,”

“Fuck. Yes, yes I want this,” she breaths out and Bruce smirks, hoisting her up onto the counter, she grins into his neck, peppering kisses down it, she kicks off her heels and nudges his leg “Shoes, Bruce,” he reluctantly sighs, but pauses to slip out of them “You’re not running my flooring,” she says casually while slipping off her shirt.

“You’re so dramatic,” he kisses her again, nibbling at her lip while his large hands grope at her tits through her bra, As Isabella moans, her own hands run down to unbutton her jeans, but he stops her, grabbing her hands tightly “My job,” Bella grins and removes her hands, placing them on the counter behind her

“Want me to lay back as well?” she teases, but Bruce merely pushes her down, causing her to laugh he unzips her trousers and gently instructs her to lift herself up so he can shimmy them down, she complies and hears the gentle thud of the denim on the ground.

She was exposed now, her dark blue underwear on show for him to see, and his hands run down her thighs “Is this the set I bought you?” When Isabella goes to remind him that there was a point in her life where she exclusively wore underwear from him, she feels him swipe between her folds, collecting what had leaked through already, she thanks god he doesn't comment on how quickly he got her worked up. It takes him a while to move up her legs, massaging her ankles, and bringing his lips to her knees, slowly kissing up her thigh.

“Bruce..” she moans out

“Mhm?” he continues his actions, leaving a light hickey on her thigh

“Touch something…please,” she’s breathless, feeling her slick pool in her underwear

“I’ve got to warm you up darling,” he squeezes her thighs, one hand reaches up to her bra and slips under it, squeezing her right boob, causing her to sigh in relief, the other hand easily slips off her underwear, leaving her almost fully exposed. He gently cups her whilst his right thumb flicks at her breast, Bella gasps sharply, but it quickly turns into a moan when he starts to slowly circle her clit.

“Bruce please,” she groans, she felt like she was on fire, her slick was starting to get uncomfortable, and she just needed something, some friction. Thankfully, Bruce listens to her, and his middle finger slips inside her, slowly moving in and out.

“God you’re still so tight,” he picks up the pace, and Isabella arches her back

“More,” she moans out

“Have you forgotten who’s in charge here?” he says sharply, pulling his finger out, leaving her empty again, Bella wants to kick him, but she sits up, his hands both on her thighs.

“Please,” she adds, he smirks, and soon she’s back lying on the table, two fingers now inside her, slowly speeding up.

“Good girl,” he praises, and she lets out a damn near pornographic moan “Gonna take me so well later,” she starts to babble, mixing his name in with’ pleases’ while his thumb continues to circle her sensitive nub.

“Fuck..Fuck, fuck!” She’s close, she moans loudly, arching her back, her core tightens and she wants to both squirm away from Bruce and force him to go faster, leaving her a screaming mess. She feels it near and then…

Nothing.

He’d pulled his fingers out and left her just on the edge of her release. 

“Oh you ass,” she sighs, breathing heavily, Bruce grabs her calves roughly, pulling her down the island before leaning over her so they’re face to face.

“What was that?” he asks, hiding a smirk

“Asshole,” she says boldly and he lets out a breathy laugh, his hand finding her core again, fingers filling her suddenly. 

“Fuck!” he doesn’t give her time to warm up this time, moving in and out with two fingers and with such a speed Bella can hardly compute it, all she can do is swear loudly. She doesn’t know what to do with her hands, putting them above her head whilst her legs pull Bruce closer as she nears her end again “I’m close…don’t, don’t you dare-” she’s so nearly there, her heels digging into Bruce’s back, she can see his hard-on but knows he has the self-control not to take her right there, god she hated that right now.

Again, his hands leave her just as she nearly falls over the edge, tears are forming now, but god she loved it, he knew she did. 

Isabella doesn’t say anything, only putting her hand down, gesturing for Bruce to hold it, he does and she squeezes it tightly “You okay?” he asks, and she just lets out a breathy giggle.

“If you let me cum I’ll be much better,” 

He tuts softly “C’mon, sit up,” she does as she’s told and he scoops her up in his arms, she screeches and grabs on behind his neck, giggling as he carries her to the bedroom. 

The apartment had been nearly abandoned since Isabella had moved in with Bruce all those years ago, it was used as an office for her, somewhere to go when the Cabin was too far away, and she needed a break from work. Now, it’s become her permanent residence again, she’d been picked up from Bella Reve in a simple Range Rover and driven here, not to her home with Bruce, to a dusty apartment with no one to speak to. 

Slowly, Bella had started to redecorate, and the bedroom hadn’t been touched yet, with cream walls and a collection of musky-smelling candles on her dresser. 

Bruce lays his wife down on her bed, hovering over her to press soft kisses to her lips, he was gentler now, and Bella couldn’t help but wonder if the guilt of leaving her had kicked in, she really wasn’t good at not being sad these days, and that still applied during sex apparently.

She runs her fingers through his hair and he starts to kiss down her jaw, he bites at her neck and she moans, scratching at his scalp. That got his attention and he pulled back, lifting his tight black t-shirt over his head, revealing his abs.

Isabella shamelessly checks him out, biting her lip and grinning, she sits up and grabs the back of his head, connecting their lips suddenly and pulling him back down with her, her hands roaming over his chest, this makes him moan and she smiles into the kiss, her hands reaching his belt and undoing it. He lets her do it, his own hands moving to her back, unhooking her bra, his lips unlock with hers and starts to suck at her left boob, whilst his right hand fondles the other one, his left-hand sneaks down to her opening, collecting the slick once again. He inserts his fingers for the fourth time, this time moving slowly to match his pace on her tits.

It doesn’t take long to get Bella to the edge again, he’d worked her up so much - denying her an orgasm twice, and looking far too hot while doing it. She tries not to show that she’s about to cum this time, but her moans become more high pitched and her grip on his hair tightens. Bruce slithers up her next, whispering in her ear

“Come on baby, let go,” that does it, her walls clench around his fingers and she pulls at his hair.

“Bruce..oh fuck!” she screams and her juices flood the bed, god it felt so good, he continues through it letting her ride her high.

Slowly, he removes himself from her and she complains at the lack of closeness, he kisses her softly before standing up and slipping off his slacks, then his boxers, Isabella watches his dick spring up, pre cum smeared over the tip, and she moans at the sight of it. It was as mouth-watering as she remembered, with a thick girth and decent length, her core clenches just at the sight of it. Bruce gets back on the bed, he kisses her again, and she chases his lips.

“You ready?” he checks and she nods “Wo-”

“Yes,” she doesn’t need him to finish the sentence “Fuck, please,” he smirks and pumps himself slowly, groaning at the feeling of his own hand, oh how he often imagined her manicured fingers around him instead of his own, how he remembered the tightening of her cunt around him. 

Bruce slowly lowers himself down and inserts himself into Bella, she gasps ever so slightly, letting out a shaky hum and Bruce joins her.

“Taking me so well, fuck,” he bottoms out after the slow process, Bella lets him stay there for a moment as both of them relish in the tight stretch of her “Missed you,” he whispers into her ear and she shivers “so much, god,” his hips buck involuntarily and she gasps.

“You can move,” she greenlights and he pulls back before sharply re-entering, both gasp and slowly he picks up his pace, the bed shakes as he grunts

“Fuck…So perfect,” 

Isabella grabs onto his biceps, her nails digging into the skin, the pain edges him on and Bruce keeps up the rough pace, his own grunts of pleasure mixing with Bella’s moans “Faster. Oh fuck, shit,” she feels the rope tighten in her stomach again, and she screams out “I’m close!”

“Just a little bit longer, come on, you can take it,” Bruce watches her tits jiggle with each of his thrusts “Come on,”

“I can’t-” she scratches down his arms “Gotta cum,” the pressure is too much, he’s so big, she’s so full “Please Bruce, let me - please, oh shit,”

“Let go, darling, come on,” with that, the dam breaks, and again, Bella moans loudly, arching her back, her hips jerk with the sensation and Bruce continues his thrusting, he tucks her hair behind her ear, kissing her as his own pleasure builds, her walls trying to milk him dry “Can I- shit,” he groans and Bella recognises the signs, her fingernails scratch at his scalp

“You can cum inside,” she explains and that's what makes him let go, his cum coating her walls. He rides out his own release and Bella continues to moan. Finally, he collapses on her, the heavyweight comforting.

Both lay there breathless for a few minutes, overwhelmed by the mix of emotions they’d both felt. Bella feels her eyes slip shut, and Bruce slowly stands up, his cock exiting her, she groans at the emptiness, and crosses her legs.

Bruce stands up and starts to walk away from the bed, Isabella looks up, just seeing his backside as he puts on his boxers.

“Don’t leave,” she says panicked, tears in her eyes, he looks almost offended but remembers the post bliss, vulnerable state she’s in and leans down to kiss her temple.

“I’m just getting a cloth sweetheart,” he reassures, and when he returns from the en-suite, he cleans her up, ending the night with her in his arms.

[jsab-crisis]

Time to finally rip the bandy-aid off...

Hi, I'm the creator of JSaB Crisis AU, the owner of this blog, the artist of this comic, and so on and so on. I haven't updated this comic in- I forgot when I stopped, to be honest, I haven't touched this comic in a long time or anything relating to this AU in particular.

I've had people ask and are rightfully concerned regarding when I'll post the next pages and if I'm actually still doing this fan comic series. So, here's my answer;

I don't plan on touching this comic anymore or even the AU itself, for multiple reasons;

Technical difficulties in production is one thing, I use mobile Medibang paint to draw this comic and at one point there was an update that became a massive roadblock to it. You see, I've put the entirety of Crisis AU in one cloud file, even the WIPs, and depended on that due to not wanting to fill my storage with junk.

Crisis AU started when I was using an old phone with limited storage hence why I used Cloud-- it also helped me transfer all the art since I use the same medibang account. (Got a new phone afterwards)

Now, the medibang update that messed me over was when they added a premium membership in which you can access other assets such as brushes, certain controls, and cloud storage. They put a cloud storage limit which messed up all my cloud files (mind you, I've been using Cloud files for nor just the comic but for everything, even on my laptop for personal art/other projects).

Because of that, this made the cloud file almost inaccessible unless I manually save each page to my storage which... was infuriating and a huge demotivator. Had to delete other cloud files to at least make space but because of how many pages there are, well, I just left it there.

Loss of interest is also a common thing when it comes to fan series. My JSaB hyperfixiation died down at one point as I leaned to other medias, making me focus more on other media with LOTS of interest AND motivation to work on something relating to that instead of the comic itself.

This is very common with other fan series to my knowledge, having seen lots of discontinued fan works when I was merely a DA user.

Of course, my interest towards JSaB had kicked in again. I still love that game and the community i was a part of for awhile, having met wonderful and talented people throughout the year(s) and still do.

However, this also comes to my third reason.

Doubt. I have started to grow a distaste towards Crisis AU due to the writing itself and how my art is constantly changing. As time goes on, so does one's creative ability and taste and let me tell you how many times I've grimaced as I looked upon my own script. My writing style and comic making has changed over the past year and comparing it to this, I'd say I prefer now than whatever this was.

The concept of JSaB in a slice of life and modernized world that attempts to tackle personal turmoil? It's nice but it's not something I'd make in a heartbeat. I knew my goal with this and what I wanted to do but now it doesn't spark that flame of interest anymore.

Crisis AU is, well, a Crisis. The irony in that, am I right?

Not saying it's entirely hopeless, no, feel like if anyone would take this concept and do it their own then I'm sure they'll be able to execute it well with their own passion. It's just not me, if that makes sense.

Crisis AU is somewhat decent, mediocre, messy, and abandoned. It's a genuine shame to see how things have changed as it isn't the only art project I've abandoned due to the lack of creative flame. I can sympathize to those who actually looked forward to this as I've been met with support by those who read the comic and yet I am unable to continue delivering the series to its fruition.

Hell, I couldn't even pass the introduction arc!

...so yeah, that's why. I haven't touched this comic in a while because I've lost interest and I think I'll be able to rewrite it as the concept is lost to me now.

Now, it might be time to ask the Golden question when it comes to change!

What now?

For start, I might just let this blog become an archive because deleting in entirely would be an insult. I don't downright hate it! Slap a "Discontinued" onto it along with context in the blogs description.

Next? Well, I have multiple plans but I'm also worried they'll meet the same fate as Crisis AU so I'll start with small things.

Rebrand on the Crisis JSaB Discord Server.

All invite links have been revoked to stop new members for entering as we're entering changes. It'll be rebranded as a small JSaB server, dedicated to all JSaB fans. Channels, categories, even rules will be changed for simplicity sake and to fit the new name. This will then be followed with reopened Mod applications.

Ask Box will still be answered !! That means:

Crisis AU characters will still answer Asks regarding the discontinued comic series.

...which would make it more of an ask blog, yes? Huh. Whatever works. Take it as compensation due to the discontinued comic series. Ask box will still be open and I'll be answering old asks that are still there. So, yeah, you can still interact with the characters and even ask regarding what the lore was all about. I (or, well, specifically the characters) won't be keeping secrets anymore, nope.

New... projects?

I have another JSaB AU I've been rewriting for a while now, more interested in that since it at least LEANS to the Canon story... kind of. I won't be jumping to making a new blog and starting a new comic ONLY to be discontinued after an unannounced hiatus followed by a similar long text post/apology. No, I don't wanna set myself up again.

So, I'm staring off with small snippets of comics that piece together in my art blog and maybe make a blog that acts as an ARCHIVE. Keep things organized and pretty. This will inly happen if I reach a certain amount of comics, yes.

It's something, makes me less overwhelmed with trying new things. I've been getting better at comic making and writing! This might be a new start.

And, of course, I wanted to say this to everyone;

Thank you for everything and I'm sorry for not delivering.

The amount of support I've received during the active production of this series was genuinely heart warming and boosted my confidence in comic making. I wouldn't want it any other way.

And I'm sorry for things having to come to a disappointing end, but I'll make up to that. I promise.

If I was given the ability to wish that I never started Crisis AU then I would refuse.

Because then I wouldn't have met such wonderful community. I wouldn't want to change anything about it.

Don't fret, friends! I'm still here! It's not over, buds.

We just keep moving forward.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary295

7/10/24

wednesday

did a bit of writing today.

and the j-card is done. metadata undone, that changes 2morrow for sure...

all it takes to write is heat exhaustion and slightly fried nerves and dysphoria. so i guess mega fried nerves. and matcha.

here is da j-card:

i like how unreadable it is to beeeeeeeeeeeeeee honest. it's like it just makes you stare at the thing and the text just kind of melts into a mess. especially the big chunk there which is just every song title listed unspaced.

there's some stupid discourse out on the internet today, obviously i shouldn't look but there's some insanity about all the stuff going on re: sexual politics atm. the way people are throwing around 'sex positivity' which can really mean 30 different things, some of which were pretty minimal and like, don't judge people who have lots of sex because sex can be a thing that happens for all kinds of reasons, we ought to have conversations about sex outside of the regular assumptions re: desire and what it leads to, an aversion to moralism, or rather directionless 'having sex is liberating*' (* meaning: if you want to have sex), there is more here too.

really the baffling part for me, outside of the moralism, or i guess i should not say baffling, but it's generally how each generation seems to have bought more and more into the distinct generational character thing, creating insane stereotypes as if they're super real and just proceeding with a huge chunk of earth being those things and never really thinking about or interacting with, those people, or when they do, what they see are the assumptions/signs that they are what they imagine, and nothing else. and as this goes on, it strengthens each prior generation's notion that it is a thing unto itself, it solidifies against the stereotype as if that defends itself, or taking these features as points of pride rather than spectacular invention. this results in the kinds of millennial you see getting mad about eminem getting cancelled or this discourse about how millennials didn't know what boundaries were.

one thing lost in all this is the fact that the mid 00s were a horrific time to be feminine, thinking abt a lot of the ed stuff, the american apparel ads and so on (i recognize the irony in me saying this after posting that image i made where i am wearing american apparel thigh highs + the general uhm sexual nature of the cover and stuff but i'm messed up okay i don't want to get into it but i guess i have and i am crazy and whatever and i at least want to use that in a way that isn't me doing things that hurt myself okayyyyyyyyyyy), this wasn't liberating but it's also not because of 'sex positive feminism' that these images came to be, it's because of patriarchal exploitation and the pornographic gaze which is deeply bound to advertising already, a lot of these things remain the same, we have our current day forms of this. it's an issue that does not need to be so complicated and obfuscated by generational fingerpointing, but i think it feels good to do this, and this is the essential drive mobilized by posting inside the computer, the feeling good and right, and the invention of things to be right about, creation of logics which enable the rightness, and the ability to litigate truth with these methods, at their root they are not very complex usually, it's just about being able to 'see' a demographic and point at it. it goes beyond strawmanning to the point of really seeing people in a distorted way, not inventing them, but seeing them speaking, and not being able to understand because you know what they are already. it's wholly spectacular and strange.

anyhow, this is a pointless thing to look at. interesting to note i guess though. or useful for me. it does wig me out though, everytime you see surges of radical leaning or, idk, i don't think this is radical at all really, but this "radical" appearing way of thinking, you see terfs pop up, young ones too, that always wigs me out, they're funny though, not like in a good way, they're just, funny, as a notion i suppose.

anyway i need to sleep, i hope nobody finds my blog somehow over this and hits me with a t.i.m. moment, they love 2 hit that shit like the griddy.

oh one other thing, there was this british kid in the store today, he put a box of triscuits in his shopping cart, his mom asked what they were for as her and her friends were looking around for crisps, and he said "smores", and i felt so bad and i wanted to say something, as i stood there waiting for my girlfriend, like how he needs graham crackers for his smores and not triscuits but i didn't say anything but he put them away anyways. i am glad there was no tragedy but i feel bad that i might have enabled a minor tragedy in some way, that's kind of a stupid way to think but it's true . as in true that i felt that. or even feel it.

anyway

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[luxlightx]

So here is a little fanfic made by me (my first one)

[...]

Bensons' house:

Today is a special day, Millicent's mother, Gwen, makes a visit due to her daughter's birthday.

Freddie and Carly are cooking together Millicent's favorite food which is also Gwen's favorite food.

Millicent walks through the door of the house, her footsteps stop when she sees her father and Carly cooking together.

She remembers that the last time the two of them cooked together they almost burned down Spencer's house, but it seems that now they have better synchrony to cook together, Millicent sees the smile her father has on his face and the reason was Carly.

Never in her short life had seen her father so happy with a woman, nor with her mother.

Freddie and Carly played small games with flour while cooking, their laughter contagious the place.

— What are you guys doing? — They are interrupted by Millicent, they both stop playing and look at her while smiling.

They both start walking towards her, heading towards the small living room.

— Oh, we're cooking for your mom's arrival. — Freddie says.

— I'm afraid that's going to be poisoned — Says Millicent with clear irony.

— Millicent! — Freddie shouts — It is not poisoned!

A phone call interrupts them, it's Freddie's phone.

He carefully takes his mobile phone out of his trouser pocket, then, he checks who is calling him.

— Baby, I have to answer the call, maybe it's something important, I'll come back as soon as possible, and then we can continue cooking, okay? — Freddie says as he slowly approaches Carly.

— Okay — They both have a smile on their face, Freddie reaches out to kiss her and then it happens, a sweet kiss where you can clearly see that the two of them love each other.

Freddie answers the call as he heads to his room and disappears from the living room leaving Millicent and Carly alone.

— I'm so excited to see your mom. — Carly says being the first to speak and break the tension that had been generated in a few seconds.

— Oh yeah, about that, I wouldn't be too excited about it when she find out you're dating her ex-husband — Millicent responds with her usual irony.

— Why not? — Carly says this time with fear and worry.

— Well, you know this thing that millennials says "a friend can not date another friend's ex?"

— Yeah... But I'm not a millennial and that's nonsense that people make up. — Says Carly with fear.

— First, you may be friends with my mother and not know anything about how she really is, and second my mother IS a Millennial and what you say is nonsense for her is something very important, maybe when she discovers that you are dating her ex-husband, possibly hate you or worse, she may kill you, who knows — Says in an innocent way.

Carly stares at Millicent trying to process the information, and when she is processed, she realizes that she is panicking, she swallows with difficulty, she has to get out of there

Freddie returns to the living room — False alarm!, they were only those of the advertising trying to rip me off.

No one says anything, Millicent is looking at Carly, Carly is looking at Millicent in a trance.

— Umh, what happened here?, Carly? — He asks while looking at her with concern, but she is so distracted in her world that she can't hear him.

— Carly? — Nothing — Millicent? — He finally asks to his daughter.

— Nothing Dad.

Carly comes out of the trance, she was overwhelmed and needed to get out of there, she took her phone out of her pocket.

— Oh!, Harper is calling me, it must be important, I'd better go, see you later, baby, Millicent. — She lied, no one was calling her. Carly leaves the Bensons' house in a hurry. Freddie didn't have time to respond her.

— What did you tell her? — Freddie asks in a worry.

— Nothing!, just the truth. — She exclaims.

Freddie sighs deeply — Millicent... If you're trying to Carly and me go to break up, stop that, because I'm not breaking with her.

— Why you care so much about what I told her? You weren't like that with mom or Pearl.

— Because... Because I love her, Okey? I love Carly so much you can't imagine and I can't lose her. I think I have never been so in love with a person, it was always her.

— What do you mean with "it was always her"?

Freddie was about to answer but Marissa walked through the door.

Millicent goes to her room and slams the door

Because Millicent knows almost nothing about her father's past, nor does she know how important Carly is to him.

Years ago Freddie and Carly promised not to tell their future partners everything they had been through together, Freddie's crush on Carly that never went away, the accident. No one knows about it but them, Spencer and Melissa

They were hiding something that might be a detonator for some people, which is why they act differently than they've acted with their old couples, which is why their relationship is so strong and more now being the two of them a couple.

[...]

At night, in a park, celebrating Millicent's birthday:

At the birthday party are Carly, Freddie, Marissa, Millicent, Spencer, Paul, Lewbert and Gwen. Harper would arrive at any moment.

Most of the time it was the four of them, Carly, Freddie, Gwen and Millicent, Millicent didn't like the idea of Carly being with the three of them on her birthday, Millicent wanted a day with her father and mother.

It was until at some point she couldn't take it anymore and ran out of the place, heard the voices of others calling, and left everyone worried.

After running for several hours trying to find Millicent, Carly saw someone in the distance.

— Guys! She is over there! — Carly shouts as she spots Millicent sitting on top of a large rock, She has her head down.

Carly, Freddie and Gwen run to where Millicent is.

— You scared the shit out of us, Millicent! — Freddie says gasping for having run for hours.

Millicent doesn't answer or rather, she doesn't want to talk.

— I want to talk to her, I think I know what the problem is. — Says Carly determined.

— Are you sure? — Says Freddie worried.

— Yes, I am, don't worry, we're gonna be fine. — Carly brings Freddie to her and gives him a tender kiss on the lips in a farewell way so that he does not worry, then Freddie and Gwen leave the place leaving Carly and Millicent alone.

Carly sits next to her, on another stone near her.

— You don't know what the problem is, do you? — Millicent says as she looks at her with tearful eyes.

— No, I just wanted to sound cool, what is the problem Millicent?

— I just wanted to spend the birthday with my parents, with my family, you know, I almost never get a chance to see my mother, and for a next day, I just wanted to spend the day with the two of them.

Carly lowers her head slowly nodding.

— Yeah, I understand you.

The two are silent for several seconds, until Carly decides to speak again.

— Millicent, I want you to know that I don't want to take your mother's place, I would never want something like that. — Carly puts her hand on Millicent's hand.

— Yeah, I know that. Do you want to marry him? — Millicent asks as she watches her mother interacting with her mother, most of the time you could see that Freddie was looking at them, he was worried about both or them.

Carly smiles — Yes, maybe one day and if that day comes, I want you to know that you don't need to call me "stepmother", you can keep calling me Carly. — She says in a shy way.

— I won't. — Millicent smiles at her.

— Come here. — Carly says smiling, opening her arms to give her a warm hug.

Carly then shakes hands with Millicent to take her to her parents.

— Everything is okay? — Freddie asks, looking both of them.

— Yeah, She just misses her family. — Carly says with a smile — I'm going to be with Paul, Spencer and Lewbert, if you need me I'll be there. — she says while pointing to the others.

Freddie follows her with his eyes.

They're all in the same place, but Carly, Paul, Spencer and Lewbert are away talking about other people's things, while Gwen, Millicent and Freddie are talking about Millicent's new ecosystem and changes.

— I think there is a new person in the Benson family. — Says Freddie looking towards Carly.

That is when Gwen looks at Carly in the distance with a smile.

— She's a Gem, Freddie, don't lose her. — She says to Freddie.

— I know, I won't. — Freddie replies with a smile as he also watches Carly laughing.

He then calls Carly to join the family photo, as she is now part of his family.

— Hey baby, welcome to Benson's family — Freddie says with a smile. — are you happy?

— With you? More than ever. — She responds with a smile.

— What’s Up, people, did I miss something? — Harper says entering the party.

Freddie and Carly laugh looking at each other.

— Is about time, we need to explain our story. — Says Freddie.

— Yeah, is about time. — Says Carly ,while Freddie kisses her on the cheek.

THE END

[yepiamthesmileyface]

it really is a cruel irony what being disabled does to you politically. I loathe the US government, I loathe everything about what I am complicit in, but every single thing I have is because of it. my mother and I live off four hundred and thirty some dollars per month at the charity of the government. neither of us can work, I'm barely able to do any hobbies, I can't even really take care of myself, there aren't mobility aids I can use so I can't even protest. and so out of self preservation, I am complicit in it. if social security is dismantled, my mother and I will have no money. at all. I won't pretend moral superiority over it, but I want to live.

[gothhabiba]

I just wanna send you a lot of love 💜 I love your blog and not only have I learned so much but also felt really, I don't even know, understood? (I'm not sure if that's the right word). I read your post on accessibility in institutions (like the workplace, in education and so on) and it made me tear up ;-;

I'm someone who somehow managed to finish school. But I have been struggling with university ever since I started (yay for adhd and trauma) and it makes me feel like I'm not good for anything. While I know it has a lot to do with how this shit is structured and it's not entirely my fault (one of my majors is sociology ffs, but there's the irony I suppose), it's very hard not to internalise all of this. I don't even know what to do at this point. Even then, the fact that I got to uni in the first place is a huge privilege, and my mobility is something I take for granted.

So, honestly, thank you for speaking about disability and a whole ot of other things~

💜💜💜 thank you for the kind message!

[an-aura-about-you]

I Was a Queer Salvation Army Bell Ringer

Part 1: Job Searching and the Application Process

I have decided to just bite the bullet and start writing about this to get it all off my chest. I had been doing some research, and there is still some research I intend to do, but it is beside the main point of this mostly anecdotal writing I intend to do. I also decided to make it basically a miniseries as opposed to one long post dumping about everything.

So here we go.

It was the end of October of this year, 2023, and I needed a new washing machine. Between that and the upcoming holiday season, I figured the time was right to get a seasonal job. Surely there would be plenty available, right?

Well, honestly, no. Even during this time of year, job searching was pretty miserable. Job searching has been pretty miserable in general, but even the added jobs to cover the busy Christmas season were pretty miserable. They have a reputation for being easy to get, but I didn't get any sort of word back from most of the seasonal positions I applied to. And that didn't even factor in my limited availability, which would have been the nail in the coffin for most retail positions since I wouldn't be able to help out on any infamous Black Friday sales.

But while hunting for a seasonal job, one listing caught my eye that seemed unusual: Bell Ringer for the Salvation Army.

Not unusual for the reason you might think, however. I had actually worked as a bell ringer for the Salvation Army before back in the autumn and winter of 2006. I was a college student and unaware at the time both of the Salvation Army's anti-queer reputation and my own place in the queer community. I was starting to get hints that I was queer in the classic bisexual-to-asexual pipeline, but I wouldn't learn the term asexual and realize it applied to me until 2010.

What I was surprised about is that I thought they were volunteer only for bell ringers NOW, because it had been some time since I had seen a listing. On top of that, the pay was. Ok, the pay wasn't good by my own personal metrics because almost none of the local job listings are paying well. But the listed pay was better than the state minimum wage. More on that later.

So I decided, "Fuck it. If they choose to hire me, I can't resist the irony of the Salvation Army willingly giving a queer person money."

I clicked the 1-tap apply button on my job search app.

This resulted in an email being sent to me asking me to apply online through the Salvation Army's website. Weird since that defeats the purpose and convenience of the 1-tap apply button, but whatever. I do the thing we all have to do nowadays where you create an account that you know you're never going to use again and apply for the job.

I get a call a couple of days later. It's the woman from the Salvation Army heading up the red kettle program. She asks me to come to the office and fill out a paper application. For some reason, sunk cost fallacy perhaps, I agree and continue with the Sisyphean effort of applying for this job.

When I actually go to the office, I find flyers for the bell ringing job. These advertise that no, they are only offering minimum wage pay for it instead of the range listed on the app. I wish I had taken a screenshot of it because I can't find it now, but my best guess on what happened is the job search app added an estimated range on the job, as it sometimes does, and I missed the part where it said, "estimated pay." My memory is not necessarily a thing to be trusted, but job listings aren't either, so at least we're a match on that.

I fill out the paper application, and I'm informed that orientation is next week. No job interview, no hemming or hawing, the simple act of applying has got me in. They're just looking for warm bodies that are mobile enough to ring a bell. This makes sense to some degree, and indeed it was part of the appeal of the job. I knew from past experience that it is a simple job that requires minimal to no training, theoretically the easiest money one can make without being born into it.

Just like that, I was once again a bell ringer for the Salvation Army.

[one-winged-dreams]

👍 and🤡 for Xigbar, I have GOT to know 🍿for you and Lea (throw Isa in there too of course)

YOU HAD TO ASK ABOUT XIGBAR, CAN'T LEAVE THAT FUCKER OUT, NOW, CAN WE?

He ABSOLUTELY is not invited to the Halloween party, partially because everyone thinks he's dead, mostly because he's insufferable.

So we'll scale it back to the BBS days

Do they like Halloween, or do you have to force them to participate?

You know, that's actually a tough one. I think, fundamentally, he doesn't give a shit because he's just been around SO fucking long. But he still has a sense of whimsy, so fuck it, why not? He sees me put on a cute costume and is like "I'm sold." I bring up the concept of couple's costumes and he's like "HAH! That is so lame. I'm in."

If you HAD to do matching couples costumes, what would you pick? Would you both enjoy it?

SPEAKING OF. I'm going meta here, he's a zombie and I'm a ghost. But not, like, a sheet ghost. Like an 'I put on a shit ton of makeup and wore a white dress with a veil' ghost. He thinks it's hilarious because of irony (I don't think I ever mentioned the 'my insert is one of the dandelions but doesn't remember anything' lore bits, but I haven't been keeping up with the stupid mobile games for a while so I don't know how well that would track anymore.)

Do you enjoy having scary movie marathons together?

I MENTIONED THIS IN THE FIC YESTERDAY, but we absolutely do, and sometimes we find stuff that just leaves us like :U

Isa doesn't bother with that type of stuff so sometimes it's just me and Lea watching the most horrific shit imaginable.

Most of the time, though, it's regular horror movie stuff while we all sit on the couch and sometimes throw popcorn at each other.

[trshltna-blog]

you want to play? LET'S PLAY *chamber misses shot and then teleports like a coward he is*

This is a post to explain how glad I am that Chamber got nerfed because his ultimate annoys me. Just kidding. Chamber mains please don't come for me.

I love playing games. And the huge irony is that I'm not even the person who played games her entire life. I only started during the pandemic because I had literally, nothing else to do. I started off right the bat with player vs player shooter game called PUBG on mobile. I'd spend my nights until 5am even playing with my friends who I barely talk to now. Gosh, sometimes I miss it. Those were the best times.

Then I moved on to games like Genshin Impact, which I still do play now. But Genshin's more of an open-world action role-playing game that digs deeper into storyline and lore.

Now, I wanna talk about Valorant. Valorant is something like PUBG, but can only be played through your desktop, preferably if you run by Windows. It's also first person shooter (FPS) and you get to choose a character you want to play for each game, with their own unique powers and ultimates.

I love hate this game.

I say this because while I've had fun 60% of the time I've played, the other 40% is due to how toxic the players can get, how much anger this game can fuel a player and also because of how much I've spent. RIP wallet- but I do believe money comes and goes, happiness is forever :D.

Much like PUBG, I've spent sleepless nights during my semester break playing Valorant. Another huge irony is that even though this game stresses me out, I also come by to play 1 match to release stress. It's so weird. Maybe it's because I have friends to play with, which makes the whole thing even better. In terms of communicating with the team, it's also much preferable if it's your friends because we would want to work together instead of suddenly going the other way. As what they call it in game, 5 stacking for competitive.

Somehow, the validation through this game fuels me. Not in terms of rank, but knowing I was a team player throughout the game and my shots were not missed. I'm not that great at the game considering this old laggy laptop that constantly crashes when I do heavy work or play constantly without rest. Yet, I'd try to do my best like any other thing I'm trying to do too. I don't play duelist because I'm not the type to rush, I prefer to main someone like Fade who takes care of intel and defense. I'd say I'm more of a mid tier in most team scoring, but that's okay.

Oh, but I'm so tired of people bossing me around and telling me to heal or revive them when I clearly am in front of 2-3 enemies. So no more covering healer Sage from me.

What's not okay? Is having a superiority complex in the game and thinking you play better than anyone else. This has lead to many previous toxic matches I've played in mainly due to duelists or anyone who just thinks that everyone else is lower than them. It's so annoying, I want to play a game where I know everyone is on par with me, trying their best to win, not skanky 'know-it-alls'. What's worse is that their toxicity can effect others in the team too which causes them not to want to play and go AFK (away from keyboard). Honestly, how can they not? It's really discouraging to be matched with a teammate who only thinks of themselves and constantly bosses around their own teammates.

So far, Riot (the company Valorant is in) has strictly added features to report players which can ban them from playing Valorant for a span of time. I think this is good, however, they would easily just make another account and start doing the same thing again. Then, the cycle continues...report, get banned, make a new account. I would say these people are just trolls at this point because how can you be so low?

On my side however, it's still a relief that online perspective still keeps you on a safe distance so these people will never be able to attack me. Game after game, it's a sad reality that I've gotten used to the toxic community on Valorant, but I do believe this happens in every single game. Sometimes, I get matched with the sweetest people ever who cheer on you when you clutch, get a few kills and even support your almost to ace.

So yeah, even though there's the negative side of the gaming community, there are also people who play just as nice as I do, and that's okay. That's truly enough.

Also, look at this. It's canon! Raze and Killjoy of Valorant are officially together! <3

#mda20009 #week10 #socialgaming