#the game doesn’t spell it out but can piece things together if you look around
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I maybe said this already but I caved and am replaying Fragile Dream and damn, does being able to kinda sorta read Japanese helps a lot. While they translate enough of the graffiti to get by, there’s enough that they don’t and the environmental storytelling of that game was always one of my favorite things. Apocalypse setting where you can read the tragic messages of those trying to survive (but being able to infer where they def failed) is my jam.
#Syd rambles#it’s very interesting tho like for example you meet a little girl ghost early on and there’s a lot of graffiti in the building she’s in#since it repeats multiple times about being hungry you can infer she starved to death in that building while waiting for her mom#idk I just think environmental storytelling like that is cool#the game doesn’t spell it out but can piece things together if you look around#fragile dreams
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This week, we have eleven fics that feature Caleb, Essek, and at least one other person involved! Look behind the cut for some Shadowidomauk, some Blumenshadow, some Fjord/Essek/Caleb and more!
amongst the things left unforgiven by nonwal (63958, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
“In which a pair of scourgers shows up at Essek’s doorstep and saves him from himself.“ Slow-burn blumenshadow featuring heavy mistrust, mind games that aren’t mind games, and Caleb mostly in the background thinking he doesn’t deserve to be loved.
Reccer says: One of my all time faves. Nonwal’s gorgeous prose and characterization of these 4 is always top notch, but the dialogue?! The spy vs. spy mind games? The poetic descriptions of longing and grief? The visceral feeling of constant low-level panic punctuated by a full panic attack and maybe developing a crush on your current crush’s evil exes? The DIALOGUE (again)?!?! Absolutely stunning. Side note: chapter 4 features the best Jester dialogue I have ever read. The tag “openly declaring your mutual distrust can be a love language if you do it right” says so much and I love it.
Happily Ever Laughter by Settiai (1288, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: Veth’s alcoholism is brought up a few times but isn’t the focus.
Adorable Essek/Caleb/Veth/Yeza slice of life fic. Polyamory is not nearly as difficult as trying to teach a hyperactive 6 year old magic can be.
Reccer says: Incredibly sweet little domestic fic. The rapport between them is so soft and gentle and well-worn like the most comfortable pair of old house slippers. The moments where Yeza and Caleb glance at each other and manage to communicate in absolute silence (in that pseudo-telepathic way that some real parenting couples often do) are just so perfect, and Veth still finding Essek somewhat aggravating even while she loves him is :chefskiss: delightful.
Three’s Company by flammablehat (2074, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
Caleb, Essek, and Fjord have a threesome, and Essek is maybe more than a little jealous about it.
Reccer says: Possessek is always a favorite! Fjord is fjeisty, and Caleb is having the time of his life. It’s both hot and tense.
altogether, infinite possibilities by ivelostmyspectacles (199305, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
Essek has barely begun to cement his place in Caleb’s life when they bring Mollymauk Tealeaf back from the dead. Slowly, the three of them adapt together.
Reccer says: First part of a series! This was my entry point into Shadowgast!
in the pieces of what's left or what we've found by SeaWitchDreams (14620, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
Astrid takes some time to figure out how she wants to rebuild her life (and who she wants to rebuild it with.)
Reccer says: a wonderfully subtle and contemplative character study, featuring four wizards carefully dancing around each other
the sea, the stars, the dreamers by nonwal (111996, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: suicidal ideation
Essek sacrifices his budding relationship with Caleb to marry Archmage Astrid Beck - for the good of the entire galaxy. But whatever Astrid's reason for marrying him is, is not nearly as noble.
Reccer says: This fic takes an unusual premise (Blumenshadow arranged marriage spaceship murder mystery with sea shanties?) and *commits* to it. Still incomplete, but if you've liked this author's other works, you won't regret taking a chance on this one.
(Oh,) How a Human Burns by witches_chant (18318, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
This is a story about Essek trying to prepare for eventual loss, depending on if Caleb wants to use the Clone spell or not. But it’s also a story about a lazy, sexy vacation on Rumblecusp where the couple stumble upon a service top and learn things about their relationship (with a happy ending!).
Reccer says: It’s both hot as hell AND feelsy! It’s a really interesting take on Caleb & Essek’s relationship. Honestly I recommend the entire series.
Victim of Convenience by se1ze (54243, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
Essek and Caleb are together, Essek and Kingsley get together, and Kingsley is losing his mind because Caleb can’t get his shit together. An exploration of the very complicated feelings that crop up when a) no one seems to understand who you are, and b) someone you love thinks they need to stay gone for your own good.
Reccer says: The dialogue is fantastic, the sex is wonderful, and the hurt/comfort is amazing. It establishes the foundation upon which Essek/Kingsley can be a thing in a way that is both endearing and completely believable. Caleb is oblivious to how much Kingsley loves him, and once again hurts those around him by throwing himself on his sword.
(nothing in my bones can say) just where you’ve been by SaltCore (8216, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
It takes more time than Caleb realized to get home from the Hellcatch Valley, and in his absence, Essek’s tentative alliance with Astrid and Eadwulf has grown to something more.
Reccer says: Soft and complicated and briefly heartbreaking. The way it manages to feel like an outsider POV reinforces the sense of missing time, of having missed a massive change, and the softness and warmth of everyone’s love for each other is palpable throughout even in the most tense and anxious of moments.
i'll meet judgement by the hounds by necromanticomedy (yelenavasilyevna) (6553, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Dubcon/Consensual Non Consent, knifeplay
Astrid and Eadwulf come to a dinner party to meet Essek Thelyss. Things either go very poorly or very well, depending on your definitions.
Reccer says: the author called it a "insane psychosexual foursome" but neglected to mention that it's the best insane psychosexual foursome you'll ever read
To The Bone by thetickingclock (2919, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes
Snapshots of Astrid and Eadwulf's opinion of Essek changing over time (and proximity to Caleb Widogast.)
Reccer says: Hits all my favorite notes when it comes to Blumenshadow, and there's an astounding amount of characterization and relationship development packed into less than 3k words.
Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week, we’ll be back with Lifespan Angst!
#shadowgast#caleb widogast#essek thelyss#critical role#cr fic recs#fan fiction rec list#Kingsley Tealeaf#Mollymauk Tealeaf#Eadwulf Grieve#Yeza Brenatto#Astrid Beck#Veth Brenatto#Fjord Stone
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LOYALTY [Chapter 6]
Katsuki Bakugou x Sugar Baby! Reader
Summary:
You're running out of time.
Songs: Money by Cardi B Streets by Doja Cat
-----------------------------Chapter 7: Deal-------------------------------
You blink, snapping back to reality, and glance toward the source of the voice. Your manager stands there, a cancer stick dangling from his lips, a smirk playing on his features. But as you catch the way the blonde guy’s fiery glare zeroes in on him, your manager hesitates, taking an involuntary step back, the smirk faltering for just a second.
Without thinking, you place your hand over his heart to calm him, to offer some reassurance. But the moment your palm meets his chest, you freeze. ‘Holy shit!’ His heart is racing—pounding so hard it startles you. ‘Dear God, please don’t let him die here with me on top of him.’ The intensity of it continues to send a jolt through you, and for a split second, you consider pulling your hand away. But instead, you keep it there, feeling the strong, rapid rhythm beneath your fingers.
A soft breath escapes you, realizing the effect this moment has had on him—on both of you. With a steadying breath, you slowly peel yourself away from him, the connection lingering even as you step back.
“I’m hilarious,” you retort to your manager, a playful edge to your voice as you regain your composure. You give him a look that’s both a warning and a tease, letting him know you’re not in the mood for his games right now.
Your manager raises his hands in mock surrender, a chuckle escaping him as he takes another drag from his cigarette. "Sure thing, doll. Just don’t get too caught up, yeah?"
‘Fucking bastard!’
‘Fucking bastard.’
You don’t bother responding, your focus already shifting back to the group, the energy of the room buzzing once more as you slip back into the role you’ve perfected. But as you rejoin the others, you can still feel the lingering heat from where his heart beat so fiercely against your palm, a reminder that you had some unfinished business.
But as soon as the opening beats of Cardi B's "Money" hit the speakers, the spell is broken. You pull yourself into the princess persona you created and begin to slowly bounce and step along with the beat.
Bakugou stays rooted in place for a moment, watching as you step back into your role. But he can’t bring himself to watch this one, not with the way the song and your movements suggest a confidence that’s about more than just performance. He knows you have a job to do, but he doesn’t want to see you like this, not in front of other people. The thought of another man watching you, admiring you the way he has, makes something uncomfortable coil in his chest.
Without another word, he slides six grand onto the stage before making his way back to the bar, trying to put some distance between himself and the stage. He nurses a whiskey, eyes occasionally flicking back to you as you work the crowd.
It’s clear to him that you’re different with the women. There’s a lightness to your movements, a comfort in how you tease them, accepting their dollars with a smile. But it’s not the same as with the men, especially him. With them, you keep your distance, keeping the illusion alive but never fully closing the gap.
It’s subtle, but Bakugou notices, each stolen glance confirming what he suspected. You’re more at ease around women, more in control. When those men try to control your attention you don’t reward them. He finds himself wondering why, piecing together the little details he’s gathered about you.
From his seat at the bar, he can see the energy between you and your friends as you mouth the lyrics, moving in sync with one another. There’s a camaraderie there, a sense of trust and understanding that’s palpable, even to him. And as he watches, he can’t help but feel a pang of something unidentifiable—admiration, maybe, or something more complicated.
The song’s aggressive beat contrasts sharply with the way you handle yourself, the confidence in your movements underscoring that, despite everything, you’re in control. Even when you’re playing a role, there’s an undeniable strength in how you hold yourself.
Bakugou swirls the whiskey in his glass, glancing over at you again. He can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to you than what he’s seen tonight, more than what you’ve let anyone else see. And for reasons he doesn’t quite understand, that makes him want to learn more.
But for now, he settles back into his seat, content to steal glimpses of you while keeping a safe distance, letting you do what you need to do, all while feeling that unmistakable pull toward you.
As Bakugou leans back at the bar, his thoughts churn. The way you sang the lyrics to Cardi B’s “Money” so passionately had him wondering if you really loved money that much. But the way you moved, the fierce energy in your eyes, made him doubt that simple answer.
He knew there was more to it. A top 10 Pro Hero had left you, and that piece of information gnawed at him. He’d done some digging, but every time he searched for any past addresses linked to you in Japan, that other guy’s name popped up—your ex, the one the police mentioned had a history of abusing you.
Bakugou had looked him up too. The police might be idiots, but he wasn’t so easily fooled. Thanks to Kirishima’s quick thinking, he’d run your fingerprints through his personal database before destroying the cup. He didn’t need anyone else knowing what he did. And even if, later on, you told him you didn’t care if people knew,it was your choice whether to reveal your work in the club and online.
It was a strange thought, considering you never sold nudes or adult films. You never stripped down to more than a bikini. It was clear you value your privacy and had firm boundaries.
But what he found out about you shocked him. You were a foreigner here on a work visa, a registered Pro Hero. That floored him. A Pro Hero working in a strip club… why? He knew he wasn’t owed an answer, but damn it, he wanted to know why.
You were young, in your twenties, like him. You were in great shape, and with the strength you’d shown when you pushed him down earlier, he was sure you could handle yourself. Hell, you could probably throw that mammoth, Kirishima, if you wanted to!
So what the fuck happened?
His thoughts drifted back to your ex. Why did that wimp want to kill you? Yeah, he’d looked him up too—that sappy-ass loser, a poser who couldn’t even do the job himself. What kind of idiot delivers his own murder device?
Unless… What if it was just to scare you?
What if it was a trick to get you to retaliate, to get the cops involved and make the whole thing public like you feared? What if he had something on you, something that made it impossible for you to use your hero license, forcing you to work here instead?
The more Bakugou thought about it, the more the pieces started to come together. If that were the case, what was that bitch of an ex really planning to do? What did he have over you that kept you in this life, dancing for money and doing sultry streams instead of being out there, saving lives like you were clearly capable of doing?
He took another sip of his whiskey, eyes narrowing as he watched you on stage, the gears in his mind turning. There was something deeper going on here, something that made him want to dig even further, to understand what had brought you to this point. And for reasons he couldn’t quite explain, he found himself wanting to protect you, to figure out a way to help, even if you didn’t think you needed it.
He really needed to get his heart checked out, finally.
As the song wound down, Bakugou assumed it was over, but he couldn’t really tell with the hurricane of dollar bills and coins raining down on you and your friends. The stage was a mess of cash and glittering lights, obscuring his view as the crowd went wild. Some of your friends pulled out big trash bags, efficiently collecting the money while you grabbed a broom, doing your best to sweep the stage clean. Katsuki ordered a water and drank it slowly, trying to counteract the alcohol that was still buzzing in his veins.
Despite the chaos, he noticed how you deftly handled the crowd. Several people tried to stuff money into your clothes, but you just snatched it away, playing into the bratty persona you’d crafted online. It was shocking, really—how well you played the spoiled, mean girl while keeping those men drooling for more. Maybe that was your quirk after all, he thought. He didn’t know, and right now, it didn’t matter.
All he knew was that his heart hadn’t stopped racing since he met you. And like a drug, he needed more. There was something about you that pulled him in, made him want to dig deeper, to uncover the real you beneath all the layers of performance and secrecy. He left money for his tab on the counter, ordered a water bottle, and then made his way to the back, waiting for you.
As he leaned against the wall, watching the door to the private rooms, he felt an unfamiliar tension building in his chest. He had no idea what he was going to say to you, or if he even had the right to ask the questions that had been piling up in his mind. But one thing was clear—he wasn’t leaving this place until he had some answers.
Meanwhile–
Megumi worked swiftly with the vacuum, sucking up every dollar that fluttered on the stage, while the rest of you—eight in total, including Megumi's boyfriend and Eraza's girlfriend, who'd been blending into the crowd—hauled the bags to the trunk of their cars. You had the DJ, Freddy, close the curtains the moment the show ended, and now you were all stuffing your purses with decoy money, just in case things went south.
The plan was set: pay the house fees, none of the "protection" crap, and then quit. Tonight was your last night here. You were all moving to that new club, the one for pro heroes.
Well… maybe not you.
Freddy, the DJ—honestly too sweet for a place like this—came to warn you that the boss had "Big Ricky" waiting for you in your usual spot. The mention of Ricky made your blood run cold. He was the guy that would pretend to be all sweet before beating the girls senseless.
You handed Freddy your purse full of money, insisting he take it, even as he tried to shove it back. You hugged him quickly, taking his business card from his back pocket. You knew they’d break his sweet face if they found out he’d warned you all and he’d have a better chance at the new club than you would.
Why all this trouble? Your second day you found out, this wasn’t just a strip club. It was a front for dirty dealings—stolen goods, drugs, if you could name it, it was probably on the bathroom walls. Majority of the other dancers participated in the sex work, but your group was the last one standing—the only ones "unowned" by your boss, Yuji Tanaka. The only one’s he had nothing incriminating on to keep them there. He would’ve gotten rid of all of you by now if you all didn’t bring in such big spenders.
Eraza and Megumi were gonna leave with their partners, Casey dashed to the backroom to grab her things, her usual gun in tow. That left you, Michael, and Diamond—Kimiko—without a car. Michael all but ordered Kimiko to go with the others, and Freddy decided now was a good time to offer her a ride. "No funny business!" he added, but they couldn’t chase all the cars at once.
You Told everyone to regroup at the local church parking lot. They wouldn’t think to look there. Then you would change drivers of the cars to further throw them off and use old costumes from the dressing room. You were different people everyday anyway, how hard could it be?
They looked at you in shock and disbelief as Casey came back and you instituted it was the only way. Micheal nodded behind you, there was no other option. Some protests began, but Eraza's boyfriend reminded everyone the engines were running, and you all dashed for it. Not a dollar was left on the stage when you did. It was funny how clean the place looked now.
The curtains split open, but you didn’t wait to see the look on Nick's face. You and Michael took the back stairs to the lap dance section, where she quickly peeled off to take care of her regulars. Just as you were about to continue, you remembered the money in the ceiling and personal items you left in the locked drawer.
“Shit!”
You could hear footsteps behind you. Michael had a pink stun gun hidden in her wing, just in case there was trouble—she’d be fine. Plus, you’d seen her bench at the gym; she could handle herself. You, on the other hand, had a different plan.
Using some nearby leftover furniture, you climbed up into the ceiling, trying not to touch anything too gross as you crawled through the dark, the trash bags crinkling beside you. You kept going until you reached the hallway where you’d last seen the ash-blond. Peeking through the tiles, you gauged the situation below, then dropped down behind him with a cat-like grace.
He was surveying the area tensely, every muscle coiled as if ready to spring into action. You felt a flutter of nerves as you reached out and gently tugged his jacket.
"Uh, hey," you tried to manage casually, hoping you didn’t sound as nervous as you felt.
Bakugou turned around, completely shocked to see you standing there. His eyes widened as if he couldn’t quite believe you’d just appeared out of nowhere. Before he could utter a word, you sighed heavily, grabbing his wrist firmly.
"Look, I don't have a lot of time, but I need your help. Follow me," you said, your tone leaving no room for argument.
Without waiting for a response, you began dragging him down the hallway, your grip on his wrist strong and unyielding. He followed, too stunned to protest, his mind racing with a million questions. What the hell was going on? Why did you need his help? And why did it feel like whatever was happening was serious?
You led him into the bathroom, pushing open a secret door that led into one of the empty lap dance rooms. The dim lighting barely illuminated the space, casting eerie shadows along the walls. Bakugou’s eyes darted around, trying to take in everything at once, but it was clear from the look on your face that whatever was going down took precedence over his questions.
You all but threw him into a chair, keeping the lights off in the room. The sudden buzz in your bra made you pause. You pulled out your phone, seeing that the other girls had already gotten away and were sharing their locations with each other. Before you could drop yours, Michael texted that she was finishing up and hiding out back, waiting for you because she had a taxi on the way.
You quickly texted back, giving yourself a ten-minute window, before sliding your phone back into your bra. When you looked up, Bakugou's intense red eyes were trained on you, his gaze filled with confusion and concern.
"I think we know who we are, don't we?" you said, your voice low but steady, breaking the silence that had settled over the room.
Bakugou's breath hitched for a moment as he processed your words. Everything about this situation screamed danger, but the way you looked at him, the way you moved with such purpose—it stirred something in him. This wasn’t the time for his usual bravado. Instead, he simply nodded, acknowledging the unspoken truth that had been hanging between you since that night at the police station.
"Spill, princess," Bakugou demanded, his voice gruff but edged with genuine concern.
"Please don't call me that." You flinched at the nickname, as if his words had physically hurt you. The reaction made him frown, hard. A deep crease forming between his brows. He hadn’t meant to upset you, and seeing you react like that unsettled him.
Without a word, he passed you the water bottle he had been holding, a silent gesture of peace. You took it gently from his hands, your fingers brushing against his for a brief moment. The touch was brief, but it left an imprint on both of you. You inspected the bottle as if checking it for any hidden intentions before unscrewing the cap and finishing it in one shot. The cold water was a small comfort, grounding you as you prepared to open up.
"So you already know who I am. I'm assuming you're Ground Zero, right?" you asked, trying to sound casual but failing to hide the tension in your voice.
Bakugou stiffened, the name hitting him like a jolt. He nodded slowly, confirming your suspicion. His mind was racing, trying to piece together what you might be about to tell him. He opened his wallet and slid you his pro hero license. You looked it over and used the condensation of your fingers to wipe over it and make sure it was legit before sliding it back.
"Look," you began, your voice softer now, almost hesitant. "How you spend your time off duty is on you. Thank you for the save earlier and for being a good client, but I'm in a lot of deep shit—other than the shitty ex—and I need your help."
He leaned forward slightly, his full attention on you. “Go on.”
Taking a deep breath, you began to explain everything. How you ended up in this mess, the reasons behind your current situation, and what was happening right now.
"I was a registered pro hero, once," you started, your voice trembling slightly as you delved into the past. "I came here on a work visa after graduating, ready to start my career. But things didn't go as planned. My ex—he’s not just a shitty old flmae. He’s dangerous. He’s been controlling, manipulative... abusive. He’s a pro hero too, and not exactly the type to go down in a fight.”
As you spoke, Bakugou’s frown deepened. He could see the pain and frustration in your eyes, the weight of your words heavy in the room.
“Longer story short, he kicked me out and I couldn’t find another job. I was isolated, scared, and... I didn’t have anyone to turn to. I ended up here, doing this,” you gestured vaguely around the room, “because I needed to survive. But this place... it’s not just a strip club. There’s shady shit happening here. Stolen crap, drugs, sex, whatever. My group refused to hand over the cash haul tonight and now we’re on the run.”
Bakugou clenched his fists, the thought of someone like you being trapped in this kind of life making his blood boil. You continued, unaware of the storm brewing inside him.
“I need to get out, but it’s not that easy. Tonight, we planned to quit. But there’s a chance I’ll be caught before we can leave. The boss has people watching us, and if they find out what we’re doing... it won’t end well.”
You paused, looking down at your hands, which were now trembling slightly. “I need your help. I don’t know who else to trust, and I’m running out of options.” You sniffed and tried to bite your cheek to keep the tears forming in your eyes from spilling.
Bakugou exhaled slowly, his mind reeling from everything you’d just told him. He hadn’t expected this when he walked into the club tonight. But as much as the situation was fucked up, there was no way he was going to leave you to deal with it alone.
“What do you need?”
You looked up at him, your eyes meeting his, and once again for the first time in a long while, you felt a glimmer of hope.
You looked up at him, your eyes meeting his, and for the first time took notice of how nice they were. "I'm sure Nick is still trying to find the money from the first performance. I know it's petty to just not leave it, but we worked hard for it, and you contributed too!"
Bakugou felt his ears get hot at that. The compliment caught him off guard, and he could feel the heat creeping up his neck.
"I know you're not the best with people from your interviews and whatnot, but you're great at rescue missions. I have a spare janitor's uniform in the back and two trash bags. I left my personal stuff in a cabinet and—" You turned around, fishing a small key out of your top, then turned back to see Bakugou’s face tilted toward the ceiling, clearly trying to give you some privacy.
"Hey, don't leave yourself exposed," you said, your voice firm but with a hint of a smile. "But I need my personal stuff. I ran here after the station, and I had my day job's crap on me. You’ll basically pretend to take out the trash, but one bag will be me and my stuff, and the other will be the money."
Bakugou lowered his gaze back to you, processing your plan. Before he could get a full sentence out, the door burst open with a loud crash.
You both whipped around to see a large, burly man standing in the doorway, his eyes narrowing as he took in the scene. It was Big Ricky, one of the club’s enforcers, and the menacing aura he gave off was enough to make anyone’s blood run cold.
Bakugou instinctively stepped in front of you, his posture tense, ready for a fight. "What's your problem, asshole?" Bakugou growled, his voice low and dangerous, already on edge from everything that had happened tonight.
Big Ricky’s eyes flicked between the two of you, clearly sizing up the situation. “Boss wants to see you, princess,” he sneered, ignoring Bakugou’s question entirely and focusing on you.
Your heart pounded in your chest, the plan you’d just formulated now hanging by a thread. You knew you didn’t have much time before everything went sideways.
“We were just heading that way,” you said, trying to sound calm, even as your mind raced for a way out. You gave Bakugou a quick glance, hoping he’d catch on to what you were about to do.
Bakugou’s eyes flashed with understanding. “Yeah, but we need to make a stop first. Girl’s got some stuff to pick up,” he said, his tone cold and authoritative, daring Big Ricky to challenge him.
Ricky hesitated, clearly not expecting Bakugou to be so bold. “Boss didn’t say anything about that,” he said, though there was uncertainty in his voice now.
“Then the boss can wait,” Bakugou shot back, his voice firm.
Bakugou didn’t miss a beat. As Big Ricky continued to size the two of you up, he scoffed loudly, crossing his arms over his chest with a dramatic flair that surprised even you.
“What the hell is this?” Bakugou barked, his tone dripping with indignation. “I drop stacks in this place every time I walk in, and this is how I’m treated? Like some fucking nobody?”
You turned to Bakugou, eyes wide, momentarily stunned by his performance. It was as if he’d smoked something strong and was high on his own dramatics. But then you caught the look in his eyes—a silent plea for you to play along.
Realizing what he needed, you quickly slipped into the role, your expression turning icy. “Is this how you treat your best customers?” you chimed in, crossing your arms and adding a touch of haughtiness to your voice. “I’d think twice before coming back here if this is how you run things.”
The two of you made such a ruckus that it wasn’t long before the boss himself, Yuji Tanaka, appeared in the doorway. His expression was one of irritation mixed with curiosity as he took in the scene before him.
“What’s going on here?” Tanaka demanded, his gaze flicking between you, Bakugou, and Big Ricky.
“He says she owes him a lap dance or some shit,” Big Ricky muttered, trying to deflect the tension onto you.
Tanaka’s eyes narrowed, and for a moment, you feared he might see through the charade. But then he sighed, clearly more interested in keeping his high rollers happy than dealing with whatever drama was unfolding. “Fine,” he said, waving a hand dismissively. “One dance, then baby doll has to take care of something for me. Clear?”
“Crystal,” you spat, glaring at Tanaka with enough venom to make it believable. As soon as the words left your mouth, the lights dimmed, and the door clicked shut behind the two of you.
“I better hear that music!” Tanaka’s voice echoed from the hallway, making your heart race even faster.
Swallowing hard, you rushed over to the speakers and plugged in your phone, quickly selecting Doja Cat’s “Streets” on loop. You knew those old geezers outside wouldn’t notice if it played twice, but three times? That was pushing it, and you couldn’t afford to test your luck tonight.
As the sultry beats filled the room, you turned back to Bakugou, feeling a wave of nervousness wash over you. This was supposed to be a distraction, but now it felt too real. You took a step closer to him, trying to ignore the pounding of your heart.
Bakugou’s red eyes were locked on you, intense and focused. You could see the gears turning in his head, questions swirling just beneath the surface.
“Before we do anything,” he began, his voice low and steady, “I’ve got some questions.”
You bit your lip, knowing that time was ticking away but also understanding that he needed answers to trust you fully. “Okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible over the music. “Ask away.”
Bakugou didn’t waste a second. “What’s really going on here? You’ve got the boss breathing down your neck, you’ve got some shitty ex who’s out for blood, and now you’re dragging me into this mess. Why are you doing this?”
You hesitated, feeling the weight of his gaze on you. “I didn’t want to involve anyone,” you confessed, your voice trembling slightly. “But I’m out of options. All kinds of shit is going down and I’m stuck in the middle of it.”
Bakugou’s jaw tightened, but he remained silent, letting you continue.
“I was trying to save enough to get out, to disappear for good. But then my ex found me, and everything went to hell. I don’t have a choice. I need to get my stuff, get the money we earned tonight, and get the hell out of here before they catch on.”
The raw honesty in your voice seemed to soften Bakugou’s expression, though his eyes still burned with determination. “And you think sneaking out in a fucking trash bag is gonna work?”
“It’s the best plan I’ve got,” you admitted, feeling a bit foolish as the words left your mouth. “Unless you’ve got a better idea?”
He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly torn between the urgency of the situation and the questions still swirling in his mind.
“Alright, we’ll do it your way,” he finally said, his tone begrudging but resigned. “But don’t think this means I’m done asking questions.”
You managed a small smile, the tension between you easing just a fraction. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
With the music filling the room and time running out, you hoped this dance wouldn’t be your last. And with Bakugou by your side, maybe—just maybe—you’d make it out of this mess alive.
Maybe.
As the door suddenly swung open, you didn’t have time to think. You instinctively threw yourself into Bakugou’s lap, catching him completely off guard. His arms reflexively wrapped around you as he tried to steady both of you. Nick, standing in the doorway, scowled at the sight.
“Hey, don’t get too handsy with the merchandise,” Nick sneered, his eyes narrowing at Bakugou.
You shot Nick a glare, brimming with defiance. “Close the door,” you demanded, your voice sharp and unwavering. You didn’t wait for him to respond, your body still pressed against Bakugou’s, your heart pounding against your ribs. Maybe it was adrenaline or desperation, but you decided to give Bakugou a dance anyway, hoping it would keep up the charade just long enough.
But before you could move, Bakugou’s hands were on your shoulders, gently pushing you back. “Stop,” he said, his voice low and firm. He sat you up on the table instead, his gaze locking with yours, something unreadable flickering behind his crimson eyes.
“What if you had someone to take care of you?” he asked suddenly, the words catching you off guard.
Your eyes widened at his question. A sense of dread washed over you, freezing you in place. “No,” you whispered, shaking your head slowly. You knew where this conversation could lead, and it terrified you. “No, I can’t let that happen again.”
Bakugou inhaled deeply, his chest rising as he tried to temper his frustration. He exhaled slowly, his breath matching yours without either of you realizing it. There was something painfully familiar in his expression—an understanding that only came from experience. He wasn’t just seeing you; he was seeing a reflection of his own struggles.
He glanced at your hands for a moment, noticing the slight tremor in them before wiping the sweat off his palms on his pants. “Look, I know you don’t trust the cops,” he began, his voice tinged with uncertainty. “And maybe you hate pro heroes too. But…”
“But?” you prompted, trying to keep the tremor out of your voice.
“God, I don’t know how to say this without it sounding shitty,” Bakugou muttered, the frustration evident in his tone.
“Then just spit it out,” you urged, your impatience growing with every second.
He sighed, clearly struggling with the right words, before reaching out to take your hands in his. You hesitated, then placed your palm flat against his, just like that night behind the glass. His hands were still larger than yours, strong and capable, enveloping both of your hands in one of his.
“Look, this isn’t how I wanted to do this, but… what if I gave you a job?”
You tilted your head, confusion flickering across your face. You’d heard of his agency with Red Riot. “Like hero work? Can’t do that right now, I’m afraid.”
He blinked, a storm brewing in his eyes. His irises, a deep, fiery red, seemed to hold a world of emotions—anger, frustration, determination, and something softer, something that made your heart skip a beat. His brows furrowed, casting shadows over those intense eyes that never left yours.
“No, I mean a desk job,” he clarified, his tone softer but still resolute. “Something simple, behind the scenes.”
You shook your head, the weight of the day pressing down on you. “I can’t do that either,” you said, your voice tinged with regret. “I had a meeting with my boss this morning… and I ran into my ex in the elevator. It’s all a mess.”
Bakugou’s jaw clenched so tightly you could practically hear his teeth grinding. The muscles in his neck strained, tension radiating from his entire body. You were surprised he didn’t crack his jaw with how hard he was biting down.
“What about if I paid you to live with me?” he asked, his tone suddenly intense, like he was trying to push you toward an answer.
“Your apartment is cute, but it’s compromised. So is your little friends’ place. If they can’t find you again, they can’t release anything to the public. But I’m assuming he doesn’t want to let you go because you have something equally bad or worse on him that could end his career and put him in jail.”
He raised his eyebrows, waiting for your response, but before he could react, you grabbed his face in your hands, holding it firmly. You stared deeply into his eyes, searching for something, anything, that would give you a reason to trust him. His eyes, those stormy, crimson orbs, were a whirlwind of emotions—strength, vulnerability, anger, and a fierce protectiveness that made you wonder if he could really be the one to save you.
The room seemed to hold its breath as you searched his gaze, trying to decide if you could trust this man who was offering to take you away from everything you’d known, who was willing to fight for you when you didn’t know if you could fight for yourself.
Bakugou didn’t flinch under your scrutiny. Instead, he let you see everything—the pain, the regret, the resolve. It was as if he was saying,
“I’m not perfect, but I’m here. I’ll be here.”
Fuck, that was a whole lot more than you ever had before.
“Let’s entertain the idea of me living with you. What did you have in mind?”
You could hear the door starting to rattle, and a wave of panic surged through you. Without a second thought, you pulled Bakugou’s face into your chest, shielding him from view. As you pressed him close, Ricky felt the sudden, sharp impact of your heel against Nick’s face, followed by another swift heel.
“Get out!” you shouted, your voice echoing with desperation. You snatched your heels back, glaring fiercely as you slammed the door shut and locked it. It wouldn’t hold for long, you knew, but it bought you a moment.
Bakugou, still flushed and bewildered, looked up at you with wide eyes. “What? First time?” you asked, noticing his shocked expression. His pupils were dilated, and he was trying to wipe the shock from his face, his breath coming in quick, shallow gasps.
‘ Fuck, she does smell good, ’ he thought, his senses overwhelmed by the close contact. He nodded slowly, still trying to process everything. You walk back over to him,
“Mine too.”
You slid onto his lap, shifting slightly to test his reactions. “So, I live with you and then what? You have me all to yourself?” you teased, your voice a mix of temptation and challenge.
Bakugou shook his head quickly, his face turning even redder. “No, that’s not what I meant,” he said, his voice strained. “Do you always offer your personal home to civilians in trouble or am I just that special?”
“It’s just you,” he replied firmly, “Because I know I could protect you better than any of those other fuckers.”
You sat on his waist, starting to grind softly, feeling the tension in his body as he tried to keep control.Without warning, he lifts you up and places you back on the table, his movements abrupt but controlled.
“I’m not one of them, pretty,” he said, his voice low and intense. “You can’t hide behind that persona with me. Now, are you gonna keep being stubborn or—”
Before he could finish, you slapped him hard. The sting of the impact seemed to resonate through him, and to his surprise, tears welled up in his eyes. When did he become such a punk? You hit harder than his old hag. But as he looked at your flushed face, your tired eyes, he felt a pang of guilt and a rush of protectiveness.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice breaking slightly. He was out of his depth, and it showed.
You started to move away, but Bakugou quickly grabbed your hand again. “No, really, I am. I’m not good at this shit. My mouth gets in the way. Look, is there anything I could do to prove myself to you?”
You swallowed hard, forcing your emotions back behind a blank expression. It pains him how easily you do that. “First, if we’re gonna do this, I’d rather do it like a sugar baby relationship. That would ironically make it easier for me right now. No sex.”
“None needed,” he confirmed quickly.
“Good. And no falling in love. Also, give me your hero license.”
Bakugou stiffened at that request, his eyes narrowing slightly. You could see the hesitance in his eyes. But before you could even react, he had already pressed the cool metal into your palm. You didn’t even see him open his wallet to retrieve it. You tuck it into your top and cross your arms.
“What's your condition?” you ask, your gaze steady as you looked up at him. With your heels off, you were shorter, and the fire in your eyes was even more apparent.
“You have to trust me,” he added, his tone firm.
“Trust isn’t given, it’s earned,” you said, your voice suspicious.
“Trust me, princess, I know that better than anyone else,” Bakugou replied. “But right now, I need you to trust me and to know I can trust you, or neither of us is going to make it out alive tonight.”
You bit your plump lip, staring deeply into his eyes, challenging him to prove his sincerity. Katsuki held your gaze, his eyes dark and intense, a silent battle of wills playing out between you.
He was right, now without the heels, you were even shorter than he thought and your eyes burned like a wildfire, like you were daring him, and Katsuki stares like he's daring you right back.
The raw honesty in his voice made you pause. His eyes, sharp and unwavering, meet yours with a steely determination. You feel the intensity of the moment, a palpable tension that crackles between you. Emotions flickering wildly within your chest and you feel like a dragon. The unspoken question lingers in the air:
‘What if you fuck me over?’
The tension in your body is visible as you weigh his words and your lack of options. Your gaze remains steady, daring him to prove himself, and Katsuki’s eyes meet yours with equal intensity, as if daring you to see past the angry facade.
“Deal?” he asked finally, his voice steady despite the tension.
“Deal,” you responded, your voice barely more than a whisper.
You both shook on it, a silent agreement sealed between you. Bakugou then scooped you up, carrying you as if you were weightless, and stood on the table. With a grunt of effort, he pushed the ceiling tiles aside, revealing the escape route.
“I hope this plan works,” you said, your voice filled with a mix of hope and anxiety.
“Me too,” Bakugou replied, his voice firm with determination.
As you both prepared to make your escape, the urgency of the situation was palpable. The night had been a whirlwind, and as you climbed through the opening, you could only hope that this risky plan would lead to safety.
"THEY'RE GETTING AWAY!"
"SHOOT THEM!"
BANG! BANG!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Taglist: @elarakive, @thealtofvalleyxdoodles, the-dumpster-fire-of-life, @raendarkfaerie If you wanna be added lemme know!
Chapter 1 is here
Chapter 4 is here
That was the first chapter! So far there are 9 posted on my ao3 account.
I own none of the images or art!!!
Be sure to check out my other works and leave likes and comments, they really help. I have a Farmer Bakugou x Gardener Reader here in the master list. Drop a follow as well if you please. Don’t be shy to leave me a little reblog if you want.
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See you soon my loves!!
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#katsuki bakugo mha#bnha bakugo x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha bakugou#bakugou x reader#bakugo katuski#bnha bakugou#bakugou katsuki#katsuki x you#katsuki x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#my hero academy fanfiction#boku no hero acedamia#bnha#mha roleplay#mha x you#bnha x y/n#bnha fanfiction#mha fanfiction#bakugou fanfiction#katsukibakugou#bakugou x you#bakugou katuski x reader#bakugou#katsuki bakugou#bakugo#aged up characters#soft bakugou
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Banjo-Kazooie
NA release: 29th June 1998
PAL release: 17th July 1998
JP release: 6th December 1998
Developer: Rare
Publisher: Nintendo
N64 Magazine Score: 90%
Banjo-Kazooie is possibly my favourite game, something I utterly love. I play it around Christmas every year and never get tired of it. But why is this? What makes Banjo-Kazooie such a lovable game to play?
For starters, Banjo-Kazooie has a lot of character, from Banjo-Kazooie themselves to the worlds, settings and music. Even characters like Colliwobble (a giant cauliflower with googly eyes) has a magical style and charm to it. I think it’s Rare’s love for googly eyes, so much stuff has it, including boulders, blocks of ice and boxes of TNT. The world of Banjo-Kazooie is just alive in a joyful way.
Then you have the heroes Banjo and Kazooie. Banjo is a fairly straight character. For the most part he’s kind and gentle and wants to do good. If he was completely on his own, he may be a bit bland, but luckily his trust friend Kazooie lives in his backpack. Kazooie is rude, sassy and will mock anything. Together, it makes for great banter between them and other characters. And all dialogue is text with grunts, which helps make their world remain unique. I really hope any (if there are any) future games keep this as I’m not sure how I’d feel about proper voice acting.
Banjo-Kazooie is a 3D collect-a-thon platformer, which doesn’t go overboard on its collectibles. Banjo and Kazooie have a lot of moves crammed onto a controller, but they all work really well. There are some slight niggles, like trying to change the camera while aiming an egg can activate your golden feathers, but the platforming itself feels extremely precise, with any missed jumps never feeling like the game’s fault. The camera also functions fine for the most part, but there’s a couple of areas with some forced angles that don’t work, such as the path to Mad Monster Mansion which is a narrow walkway that can be difficult to see.
There are 9 worlds in Banjo-Kazooie. These each have 10 jiggies to collect, 100 notes, two honeycomb pieces (which increase your health). One jiggy in every level will be finding all five Jinjos hidden in each level. The levels will be considered small by today’s standards, but I think that they are ideal. It’s a size where you can search for everything without tedium or growing tired of it. Each world has its own charm.
Mumbo’s Mountain is a great introductory world. It’s a great introduction to how jiggies are hidden. Some are out in the open, some given to you by characters, some by activating switches and some by smashing things or just trying to shoot eggs into any hole you find. It sets you up for handling the later levels. It also introduces the important Talon Trot move, which allows you to use Kazooie’s legs to traverse steep slopes, and the layout of the level encourages heavy use.
Also here is the first Mumbo Skull. Enter here and you’ll find the crazy shaman Mumbo Jumbo. If you’ve found enough Mumbo tokens, he’ll cast a spell on you and you’ll turn into a termite. These transformations are another wonderful thing about Banjo-Kazooie. They’re not in every level so aren’t overused, but they turn you into different animals (or objects), which is required for certain jiggies. They’re all wonderful to use and are simply a joyous thing to have in the game.
After Mumbo’s Mountain, we get Treasure Trove Cove, a beach level filled with crabs. Mambo’s Mountain also introduces you to a pound attack (using Kazooie’s beak), which is used here for enemies and tasks. Flying is also introduced, as Kazooie can use red feathers to fly around the map. Treasure Trove Cove is quite open, with a jiggy that encourages flying around it. There’s also a very scary shark in the water. It’s a really wonderful level.
Next up is the weakest part of Banjo-Kazooie: Clanker’s Cavern. It’s a murky underwater level, and looks fairly dull. I do like Clanker – a big whale that has been turned into a horrifying trash disposal monster, but is actually a nice but depressed individual, but there’s a lot of swimming in this level, including a very deep dive that terrified me as a kid. That said, I grow more and more fond of the level each time I play the game.
Bubblegloop Swamp swiftly returns to form, especially because of adorable crocodile Banjo. This level is split up into segments, and then croc Banjo can traverse new areas, including a fairly difficult minigame with Mr Vile, sneaky crocodile (although a move from a later level can make this easier if you wish).
Then the wonderful wintery world of Freezeezy Peak, a level revolving around a giant snowman. One slight niggle for me with this is that you can’t finish the level initially, so I’d recommend a quick trip into the next level to grab the speed trainers, but it’s only a minor hassle. In Freezeezy Peak you get to climb the giant snowman’s scarf, have aerial fights with aggressive smaller snowmen, turn into a Walrus and take part in races – WAHEEEY!
From the snow straight to the sand of Gobi’s Valley. This is one of the more challenging levels, with pyramids, temples and sphinxes holding challenges you need to complete. One of these requires a perfect run with the speed boots, and still takes me multiple attempts each playthrough. That said, there is still a load of fun and charm.
Up next is for some halloween fun in Mad Monster Mansion, a haunted house and grounds. Initially, I found this level to be incredibly daunting, but traversal isn’t as difficult as initially seems, and getting around the level is quite fun. There’s lots of rooms to explore and even a toilet to explore. Brilliantly, the toilet itself is also a character called Loggo. Oh, one thing I forgot to mention is that Banjo-Kazooie loves puns. Some people may pretend to groan at puns, but everyone loves them.
Rusty Bucket Bay is the penultimate level, with some very tough challenges. The water in this level drains your air much faster than previous levels, so even though there’s a lot of water, you only spend small stints in it. There’s lots of hidden rooms to find, with some fun and cute details hidden in them. The transformation in this level is also super adorable.
And last is the seasonal Click Clock Wood. This is split into four “sections” that you open up over time, each is the whole world in a different season, and some jiggies require doing parts in each season, although if you fully explore each season before moving on, you don’t have to go back and forth. It’s lovely to see all the changes throughout the seasons.
Connecting these together is Grunty’s tower. Grunty is an evil witch who wants to make herself beautiful (by stealing the beauty from Banjo’s sister, Tooty, who became a staple of all future Banjo games…either that or she was relegated to a missing person’s poster and forgotten about). You explore the tower, finding jigsaws to fill in with the jiggy pieces you collect to open the main worlds. There are also 10 jiggies hidden here, which require you to hit a switch in each level to reveal (except for one, which is given to you at the start of the game).
And once you get past all the levels and go to defeat Gunty, it doesn’t go straight into a boss battle (that comes later), instead you have to complete Grunty’s Furnace Fun, a trivia board game where you have to answer questions about the game (or complete some mini games from previous levels). These questions could be about Grunty herself, pictures of places in levels to identify, trivia about characters or identifying sound and music.
Music. That’s a very important part of what makes Banjo-Kazooie work. Composer Grant Kirkhope did an absolutely phenomenal job of creating some tunes that you will be humming for the rest of your lives. They also work with the levels extremely well, adding to the magical experience. The music will also vary slightly based on different locations of each level or going underwater, all with perfectly smooth transitions between them. The music to Banjo-Kazooie is simply heaven for your ears, and will put a smile on your face for the entirety of your playthrough. Even other people in your house will start humming the tunes.
Replaying Banjo-Kazooie takes between 6 and 10 hours, although this will be a lot longer the first time. It’s a great length for annual revisits and is an extremely well-contained piece of media. You can follow it by its sequel, Banjo-Tooie (as I do every few years), but it works extremely well on its own. The entirety of the game is just full of joy, accompanied by very happy tunes and a sense that everyone working on the game was enjoying themselves.
There are two versions of this game, the original on N64 and a remaster version on Xbox. I highly recommend the Xbox version, as the better controller design helps a lot, and the widescreen HD image is much nicer to see. The main other difference between the two is that the Xbox version is easier, as it saves what notes you have collected. In the original, you need to collect all 100 in one go, which I believe was mainly due to memory limits on the N64 and not the original intention.
Banjo-Kazooie is my perfect game.
And stop playing you won’t. You can always tell when you’ve got a great game on your hands: when it starts to warp time. 16 straight hours of Banjo, leaving only for calls of nature – we had food and drink brought in.
- James Ashton, N64 Magazine #18
Remake or remaster?
The Xbox remaster is pretty great, although releasing on more platforms and a few fixes and refinements would be great.
Official ways to get the game.
Banjo-Kazooie is available on Xbox One/Series and is included in Rare Replay. You can also rent it on Switch via Nintendo Switch Online
Re-releases
2008: Xbox Live Arcade
2015: Rare Replay
2023: Nintendo Switch Online (Subscription Only)
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WIP Wednesday
Decided to do a companion piece for my EGF fic, Redline, where Baz goes through Simon's stash of "to be returned" items and decides to break his boyfriend's brain a bit.
Simon
“I’m surprised you wanted to come here,” I say as the server sets down two pints. And I am surprised. Usually Baz doesn’t like pubs, or drinking (he says it's boring)(I think he was just trying to be snooty when he said that, as if it were beneath him). I’ve been here a few times, to watch a game or two. Baz would rather watch them from the flat.
Baz just smiles. “I can enjoy more pedestrian fare when I want.”
“Uh huh.” I look him over. He’s wearing a button-down under a jumper, and even though he is wearing jeans, they are probably the most expensive pair of jeans worn by anyone in this place. He’s not even wearing real trainers. They’re the slip-on kind. I hadn’t seen, but I’m sure they’re over flower printed socks (the only kind of socks he seems to own).
It's always funny to see what he considers pedestrian.
I look around. I am at ease here, especially since Baz has long since spelled everyone (from all appearances...I’m sure he actually hasn’t gotten around to everyone) in this town with a Nevermind. Everyone can see my wings, and unlike a Nothing to See Here, people can actually interact with me. They just think nothing of the wings. My wings are as normal as an arm or leg.
“I mean, for your birthday.”
“Well, we already had Italian last night.”
I scoff. “Barely.” We had eaten the food, but most of it is chilling in the fridge, now. We still haven’t cut into the cake. Baz had assured me that it will keep for the day. I’ve ordered fish and chips tonight. Baz? Steak and chips. As rare as possible.
Baz just shrugs with one shoulder and takes up his drink. Watching him drink anything but wine is always rare, so I watch. He raises a brow at me, rolls his eyes, and continues. I chuckle and take up my own drink, but place my hand over his other one as it rests on the table. It feels weird to be sitting across from him. Usually, when we’re together, one part of me is always touching him. Baz lets me, and even turns his hand so I can hold it.
“So, why here?” I ask when he sets his glass down.
“I don’t know. It was just a whim.”
“They don’t even let you smoke in here.”
“I could Nevermind them about the cigarettes.”
“No, that’s rude. Someone might have allergies or something.”
He grins a mischievous grin, but he doesn’t take out his wand to spell anything. He just smirks and drinks some more. He catches me looking at him and sets down the glass. “We can go somewhere else, if you like.”
“No. I just think that you’re—”
“Plotting something?”
“I hate to sound cliche, but, yeah.”
“Who says I’m not?”
I think about what he could possibly do. Everyone here seems to be the normal sort of crowd: all Normals. There are screens set around the room, which usually show footie matches but today just show random things. One is playing a commercial for denture paste. It’s the least romantic place I can think of. And the least naughty. It’s not even a gay pub (which we've yet to go to, even though I have suggested it a few times...I don't think Baz is shy, but I also think that bars and such are just not his thing).
“It’s fun watching you try to figure it out,” he says. He chuckles to himself, but quiets when the server brings our food.
“Well, unless you suddenly took on the illegal act of compulsion spells or paid for someone to do something embarrassing, I have no clue.”
“Good.” He eats a chip. I shrug and tuck into my own meal while he cuts into his steak. His eyebrows peak a bit at the first bite. “Not bad.”
“Better than American steak?”
“No. You need several more coats of salt and a thicker cut for that.” I think the Cheesecake Factory is one of the few things about America that Baz did like (I actually think he’d like America more if we planned a better trip…and kept him out of the sun. He’d admitted to me, sometime later, how much torture the trip was for his skin. I had asked him why he didn’t say anything at the time, and he had admitted that I was having so much fun that he didn’t want to bother me with it. We had then agreed that next time, he will speak up, so he can have fun too.).
I laugh, either way. The food is good. Not the best, but good. I have to abandon Baz’s hand at one point so that I can actually eat, but my tail is free, so I let it wrap about one of his ankles. He’s so used to me doing this that he doesn’t even blink when it happens.
I finish my meal before Baz does, which is usual. At some point Baz shoves the rest of his chips towards me, so I eat those, too. He sits back and stretches his shoulders back, then folds the ankle I am holding over the other. The movement causes his jeans to ride just a bit. My tail slides down to touch his leg more…and I notice that the texture I am touching isn’t right for socks.
“What’s that?” I ask.
“What’s what?”
I shift my tail again, sliding it downward and uncoiling enough to feel the texture. “That.”
Baz looks down, as if he could see what I am doing under the table, then shrugs. “Fishnet.”
“Fishnet?”
“Obviously.”
I nearly yank his ankle towards me. He slides down a bit in his seat, but lets me take a peek. I can see a little bit, but the room is dim, and it’s under the table. But I can make out that yes, he is wearing fishnet under his jeans and shoes.
Black fishnet. A closer weave, but it is fishnet.
I raise my head and meet his gaze. He only smirks, shrugs, and reaches for another chip. I ease up with my tail so he can sit up again. “Baz.”
“Yes?”
“Why are you wearing fishnet?”
“Because, Simon,” he says, stabbing his last bite of steak with his fork. He examines it. It’s so rare it looks gummy. He shifts his eyes to me. “It’s my birthday, and tonight I am playing pillow prince, and you,” he points the bit of meat at me. “Are going to do everything I say.”
I swallow. Hard. I have no words. All I can do is watch him as he takes in the last bite of food, then as he washes it down with the last of his pint. He meets my gaze and raises his brows as if to say, is that alright with you? It's not a challenge. It's asking for permission. Because I know he’d never make me do anything I don’t want to do.
But this I want to do.
“Alright,” I say.
“Good,” he replies. He turns to the server when they come back, and orders another pint for us both.
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Underneath the goody-two-shoes persona is damaged goods…but can the bad boy across the street save her?
Damaged Goods, an all-new angsty, enemies to lovers, sports romance from USA Today bestselling author L.J. Shen is now available!
Bailey Followhill is the perfect daughter.
Sweet. Charitable. Pretty. Control freak.
Not a hair out of place, not an inch out of line, she is everything her troublemaking sister Daria isn't.
But when her A game turns out to be a lukewarm C- at Juilliard, Bailey's picture-ready life starts fraying faster than the worn satin ribbons of her pointe shoes.
She's becoming a piece of gossip.
The Troubled Child. A drug abuser.
No longer the girl her best friend once knew.
Lev Cole is so golden, he's got the Midas Touch.
Prized quarterback. Football captain. Hottest guy in SoCal. A textbook cliché.
But with a girlfriend he doesn't love and a career path he doesn't value, Lev is coasting.
The only two things he cares about―Bailey and becoming a pilot―are out of reach.
But Lev is done being satisfied with the life others have chosen for him. He wants to pick his own cards. To demolish the seamless kingdom of lies his family stitched together on the ruins his mother left behind.
The question is, can he save his best friend and his dream before too much damage is done?
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Keep reading for a look inside Damaged Goods!
PROLOGUE
Lev
Age fourteen
I’m standing over my mother’s grave, wondering why the fuck my eyes are dry.
I couldn’t look at the coffin back inside the church. Knight said she looked pretty. Calm. At peace. But also…nothing like herself.
I squeezed my eyes shut the entire way through, the way I did when I was really little and went on spooky rides at theme parks. Now I’m freaking out because maybe I made a mistake, because it was the last time I could look at her face not through a picture.
That’s the thing about losing someone—there are so many losses along the way that make up a big loss.
No more cuddles in bed on rainy days.
No more heart-shaped fruit in my lunch box.
No more singing lullabies to me when I’m sick, with me pretending I’m embarrassed and annoyed by it when actually Mom singing lullabies is the best thing to happen to this universe since sliced bread.
Bailey is hugging me so close, my bones are about to dissipate to dust. She’s about four inches taller than me now, which is stupid and embarrassing and just my luck. My face is hidden deep inside her hair, and I pretend to cry because it seems rude and screwed up if I don’t. But the truth is, I’m not sad or gloomy or any of those things. I’m fucking pissed. Angry. Enraged.
Mom’s gone.
What if she’s cold? What if she’s claustrophobic? What if she is struggling to breathe? What if she’s scared? Reasonably, I know she isn’t. She’s dead. But logic isn’t my friend right now. Not even an acquaintance. Hell, I doubt I could spell the word in my current state. I feel like Bailey is physically keeping me together. Like if she loosens her arms around me, I’ll collapse into thousands of little marbles, scatter and disappear into the nooks and crannies of the cemetery.
Everyone files back to their cars. Dad claps a shaking hand over my shoulder and steers me away from the grave. Bails reluctantly releases me. I clutch the tips of her fingers. She’s gravity. She’s oxygen. In this moment in time, she’s everything.
Sensing my unspoken need for her, Bailey turns to my dad. “May I please catch a ride with you, Uncle Dean?”
Thank you, Jesus.
“Yeah, Bails, sure,” Dad says distractedly, laser-focused on Knight’s back. My brother is going through his own stuff right now and my dad is trying to ensure he doesn’t lose another member of our family. Usually, I’m cool with being the low-maintenance, “background” kid. Not today, though. I just lost my mom at fourteen. I want the world to stop, but it disrespectfully keeps on spinning and functioning like my life wasn’t just destroyed.
Before we hop into the car, I clutch Bailey’s fingers and pull her to me. “If I told you I want to run away from here, somewhere really far, like…I dunno, Kansas far, what would you say?”
Her big blue eyes hold mine like my eyeballs are about to fall off. “We ride at dawn, bitch.”
“Really?” I ask.
She nods once. “Try me, Lev. You’re my best friend. I’ll never let you down.”
It’s weird, but the possibility of Bailey and me running away from all this is the one thing holding my ass together right now. She might be everyone’s good girl, but to me, she’s a bad addiction.
The drive is silent. I’m a page torn out of a book. Out of place and floating aimlessly. All I have is the memory of once belonging. Then, we’re in front of my house. Everyone trickles inside in their black frocks. They look like ghouls. Home without Mom isn’t a home. It’s a pile of bricks and expensive furniture.
Invisible ivy roots me to the ground. Bailey is the only one who notices. She loiters behind with me, and suddenly, I really hate that I’m putting all my dreams and hopes on her. Because she could be gone tomorrow too. Bus accident. Freak heart attack at fifteen. A kidnap-and-murder plot. The options are endless, and I have really shitty luck with people.
“Kansas?” She grabs my fingers, playing them like they’re keys on a piano.
I shake my head, too choked up to produce actual words.
“We don’t have to go inside.” Her hands slide up to grab my arms and keep me standing. How did she know I’m close to falling? “We can hang out at mine. I’ll make fondue. We can watch South Park.” Her blues gleam like sapphires.
Fresh irritation floods me. Bailey is being soooo understanding, even though she doesn’t understand jack shit. She does have a mom. A healthy one. And a dad. And a sister who isn’t an addict. Her life is perfect, while mine is a pile of calamities.
She’s a blossoming flower, and I’m dirt, but that’s okay because the thing about flowers is they’re buried in dirt, so I know exactly how to cut her off.
Shaking her off, I swivel and stomp my way out of our cul-de-sac. She races after me, calling my name. Her Mary Janes clap the ground urgently.
“Lev, please! Did I say something wrong?”
To be fair to her, she stood no chance at saying anything right. But screw being fair. I’m hurting, and she is baggage. Just another person to love and to lose.
I pick up my pace, running now. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m eager to get there. The sky—completely blue just seconds ago—cracks like an egg. Thunder rolls, gray washes over it, and rain starts pouring in thick sheets. It’s summer in SoCal and shouldn’t rain. The universe is angry, but I’m angrier.
Whenever Bailey manages to catch the sleeve of my shirt, I speed up, but even after thirty minutes of running in the rain, soaked to the bone, she doesn’t quit. Somehow, we find ourselves in the woods on the outskirts of town. The thick, tall branches and blankets of leaves intertwine together like laced fingers above us, creating a makeshift umbrella. I can sort of see my surroundings now, and it’s pretty and it’s calm and far enough away from that stupid cemetery. I stop running when I realize I’m not gonna escape the new reality: Mom’s dead.
I finally understand the term heartbreak. Because that thing in my chest? Split open clean in two.
I turn around, my lungs scorching. Bailey is pale and sodden, her black dress clinging to her body. Her lips are blue and her skin is so pale, I see a map of purple and red veins under her flesh.
“Go home,” I growl. But I don’t want her to go home. I want her to never leave.
She steps closer, tilting her chin up defiantly. “I’m not leaving you.”
“Fuck off, Bailey!” I fold in half, screaming. I feel like she kicked me in the stomach.
She’ll leave. She’ll let you down. Don’t fall for this, Lev.
“I’m so sorry.” Her eyes are full of tears, and she flexes her fingers, itching to grab me.
Hug me.
Go away.
Fuckfuckfuck.
My mouth opens again and more bullshit spews out. “Don’t be sorry for me. Be sorry for yourself. You’re the loser who hangs out with an eighth grader instead of people your own age.”
“I wish it didn’t happen.” She ignores my insults, trying to grab my fingers again and play them like a piano, like she does every time I’m upset.
Laughing, I rasp, “I wish you didn’t happen.”
“I wish it were me who was dead.” Her face is covered with tears and pain and mud, and I can’t do this anymore. I don’t care how much I’m hurting, I can’t ruin the only good thing about my life right now. She gives me something to fight for when every cell of my body wants to give up.
“Now you’re just talking outta your ass.” I spit phlegm between us.
She shakes her head, quivering fingers darting to her hair, massaging her scalp. I believe her. And it kills me that even though I feel like someone slashed me open and my guts are pouring out, I still wouldn’t want Bailey to be in Mom’s place.
“I’m not. I’m serious. I would die before willingly watch you suffer.”
There’s a beat of silence. Then I open my mouth and the most feral, scary, loud cry I’ve ever heard tears out of it. It echoes in the sky and bounces off the trees. A flock of ravens takes flight from the treetops.
And then I go to the only place I need to be right now—I go mad.
For more information about L.J. Shen and her books, visit her website:
https://www.authorljshen.com
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Sam & Ruby
Sept, 16, 2022 New Orleans Bunker, Base Camp
Sam
I insert the key into the New Orleans Bunker’s heavy door and feel the locks move as I turn it. Part of me had been a little worried that the leprechaun in charge of the place might have changed the locks after Ruby and I left the last time. Pushing down on the handle, the door swings open easily for as old and unused as it was. Stepping inside, I push the button on the wall and lights came on throughout the lower floor.
“So far so good”
Ruby
“Let’s hope Mr. Leveau is gone while we’re here. I, for one, won’t miss him. He’s creepy. We need this time out of sight to work out our plans for what’s coming. I have some spells you need to know. It’s time to up your game, Sam. You and me knowing magic is our ace in the hole. They won’t see that coming.”
Sam
Carrying both bags inside, I set them down and then look around trying to refamiliarize myself with the place. It had been a minute since we’d been here and a lot had happened in between. Walking through to this Bunker’s ART room everything looked exactly as we’d left it. I closed the door. This trip wasn’t about searching and cataloging the Men of Letters trove of acquisitions, it was about survival.
Ruby
Hauling my case with the needed magical equipment downstairs, I set it on the map table. Taking my satchel, I remove the books I plan on using.
Sam
Rejoining Ruby, I start to open my bag. “Doesn't look like anyone's been here and that includes the leprechaun, so you’re in luck.” I pull out everything that I brought with me this trip and spread it out on the map table.
“Not sure how much time we’re gonna have before we’re missed, but we shouldn’t push it. I’ve felt people’s eyes on me since I went back to the Bunker. I know Dean has got them watching every move I make. That’s why I just needed to get away here… there are too many things we’ve got to get right to make it out of all this shit and those can’t be done with an audience.”
I look over at Ruby doing her own unpacking and then I hold up two brushes. “Ready to get started? Wards first I think. Not sure this place is angel proof… but it's about to be.”
Ruby
Taking out my materials, I rub the outside of the candle with frankincense. Using a mortar and pestle to grind the herbs needed to powder. Laying the dried herbs out on a paper towel, I roll the candle over them while it is still wet with the oil.
Placing the candle in the holder, I light it and let it burn down. While that works, I move on.
Reaching into my satchel, I take out my jar of graveyard dirt, juniper berries, black salt, and patchouli oil. Cleaning out my mortar and pestle, I grind the juniper berries, add the patchouli oil, and mix them together.
I add a small amount of the graveyard dirt to the juniper berry mix and add the black salt. Once it’s finished, I walk around the bunker and put a few grains of the mix at each doorway and any windows.
“That should do it.”
Sam
By the time the warding on the Bunker was as complete as we two could make it, I knew our time this trip was rapidly coming to an end. Returning to the map room, I started sliding the chairs, end tables and some of the larger pieces of equipment back against the walls opening up a bigger space for us to work in. I’ve already started to think of this space in my mind as our Base Camp, a place to try and prepare ourselves for the days to come.
“Ruby, I need to know that if things go South and we get separated, you’ll come to this Bunker. I’ll do the same, that way we can regroup and decide what to do next.” Digging around in the bottom of my duffle I pull out a small wooden box. “Here, it’s another key for this place, keep it with you. okay?”
Ruby
Taking the key from Sam, I drop it into my satchel. “Good idea. We need to know where we’ll be. Now I think we need to be able to get you started on being able to pop yourself places. You game?”
Sam
“Game?” Chuckles “Not really sure this is something I ever considered I’d have to be game about… Okay, okay. You tell me what to do and I’ll give it a try.”
Ruby
“Let’s start easy. Pop from where you are right now, to the other side of the room. You can close your eyes if it helps, but it’s not necessary. Just concentrate on ‘being’ over by the table. You’ve meditated for years. It’s the same kind of feeling.”
Sam
“I doubt this is going to feel anything like meditation Ruby.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes. I can instantly feel the added surge of power that’s been underlying all of my movements since I accepted the Blade from Abel. I focus my attention on the other side of the room for a bit and then crack open one eye to see if anything actually happened.
Ruby
“You did it Sam.” I laugh “You look as surprised as I am.”
Sam
“Shut up, Ruby” But I do look around me surprised that it was that easy.
Ruby
Grinning “Now, try to pop behind me.”
Sam
Feeling a little more confident, I leave my eyes open this time and just focus my sight on the spot directly behind Ruby. In less than a seconds time I find myself standing behind her and I reach out and give her hair a tug.
Ruby
“Nice job Sam. Ok, let’s make it a little harder. Let’s have you pop to somewhere you can’t see, like the kitchen. Distance doesn’t matter when you’re teleporting, you just have to see yourself being there.”
Sam
I shake my arms and bounce a bit to loosen up a little. Then nod and blow out a deep breath. “Okay.. I can do this” Closing my eyes, I imagine the Bunker’s kitchen and instantly vanish.
Ruby
Watching Sam disappear, I think, maybe the boy is getting this. Suddenly I hear loud crashes and glass breaking coming from the kitchen, followed quickly by Sam’s “I’m okay, I’m okay” I start laughing as I roll my eyes.*
Sam
I walk back out to the map room brushing glass pieces and flour from my shirt and hold up one finger in warning. “Not a word Ruby.”
Ruby
His words just set me off on another round of laughter.
Sam
“Alright, alright” Chuckling now myself. “You know, that’s kinda fun to do… and on that note, I think it’s time we get out of here. I don’t want my absence to be noticed.”
I pull the now empty duffle over my shoulder and turn back to Ruby. “Want me to try and pop us home?”
Ruby
Grabbing my now empty satchel, I look up and see Sam’s little boy eager face and tell him, “That’s a hard pass from me.” I chuckle “We’ll work up to that and try it later Sam.”
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No Harm, No Fowl (Yet)
Dean comes to Cas's garden with a surprise.
Suptober prompt: Red Flufftober prompt: "I hate you" – "I love you too" Fictober prompt: "You’re looking, but you don’t see." Inktober prompt: Fowl
(Read on AO3)
This fic is a continuation of Keep Me Fed All Year although it also makes sense as a standalone...
Dean finds him in the garden. Of course he does. Why did I bother looking anywhere else? he wonders. He's keyed up, jittery with excitement over what he's about to do, but he stops anyway, stands outside the low fence that surrounds Cas's flowerbeds, and looks.
He surveys the flowers, hundred and hundreds of assorted blooms that crowd every inch of the available space with a riotous splash of colors. He checks over the little fence that he and Cas built together, noting its continued sturdiness with approval. But most of all he watches his husband, follows his movements as he tends to his plants, ogles the way his biceps bulge his sleeves when he carries a tray of seedlings.
He only intends to pause for a moment, to enjoy the view and collect his thoughts, but he loses track of time. He might have stood there all day, except that eventually Cas looks up and sees him. The smile that splits his angel's handsome face in that moment washes out the floral rainbow in Dean's sight. Flaming red dulls to maroon. Sunny yellow fades to beige. Natural splendor whomst? Dean thinks besottedly. Don't know her. Only one beauty worth admiring around these parts...
“Dean!” Cas calls, standing up off his kneeler. “I didn't hear you get back. How were your errands?”
“Good, good,” Dean replies. The jittering anticipation is back, and he struggles to keep his tone light. “Dropped off the books at the library, picked up your order at the yarn store, checked the PO box...”
“Anything good in the box?” Cas asks, because he knows that Dean uses that box to order all sorts of useful and unusual things off the internet. His weekly trip to the post office has become something of a mini holiday between the two of them. Some weeks he comes back from town with a new bronze knife or an obscure book of lore, some weeks it's a box of fancy liquor-filled chocolates or a bottle of high-grade lube. This week there was only one package to pick up – deceptively small, metaphorically huge. Dean keeps his mouth shut, though, just smiles and nods.
Cas cocks his head and furrows his brow at Dean's unexpected silence. “Are you going to tell me what you got?” he prompts.
“Try and figure it out,” is Dean's reply. He assumes parade rest position and smiles serenely.
“Figure it...?” Cas repeats, squinting. Dean hums and waits.
“Did... Is it something I already knew you'd ordered?”
Dean shakes his head no.
“Is it for us to use together?”
An emphatic yes.
“Intimately?”
Tough call, Dean thinks, answering with a waggling, equivocal yes but not like that kind of head movement.
Cas stops asking questions and stares hard at him for a full minute. If Dean wasn't absolutely sure that Cas's remaining “10% angel” doesn't allow for direct mind reading any more, he'd throw a flag for cheating. Still, it's uncanny how focused and direct and on target the next question is.
“Is that a new t-shirt?”
“Brand new,” Dean purrs.
“Come closer, I can't read it.”
Dean files this piece of information away for later discussion. He's suspected for a while now that Cas needs glasses. He allows himself one fleeting fantasy – a vigorous round of “stern librarian and naughty patron” with his newly bespectacled hubby. Then he mentally tables the issue and steps forward.
Cas reads his shirt and gives him a nonplussed look. “I don't get it,” he states, voice flat.
“You're looking, but you don't see,” Dean says, throwing a little sass into his tone.
His husband gives a huff, already exasperated with this game. “It says 'FOWL PLAY' in big fancy letters. So it's both cryptic and badly spelled.”
“Nope, the spelling is correct.” Dean can see the burgeoning annoyance in his husband's features. It's time to make the big reveal before the fun turns into frustration. “Do you give up?” he asks with a soft smile.
“Ugh, you know I hate to give up, but yes. What's the deal with 'Fowl Play'?”
“It's the name of our farm.”
“Our...?”
“Farm, Cas. The farm we're buying, where you're gonna be able to raise chickens and keep bees and grow flowers. You can even plant a vegetable garden and I promise I'll eat what you grow.”
“Dean, what?”
“It's about seven miles from here. Good land. A little over five acres. There's a farmhouse, three bed two bath, and a barn, and there's already a nice big chicken coop with a covered yard. I put the word out in town a while back that I was looking, and the owners of this place got in touch with me a couple weeks ago. They're good people. They're heading down to Florida to retire, and they want their place to pass to someone who will love it like they have. They're ready to sell, and if you like it, we're ready to buy.”
Cas is speechless, one hand against his mouth in shock.
“We've both been wanting to get out of the Bunker and into a place that's a little more... Us. This place is perfect, baby. Think of it as an early anniversary present.”
His still-bemused husband laughs at that. “I hate you. An entire farm as an anniversary present? I'll never be able to top that.”
“I love you too, sunshine,” Dean replies fondly. “But technically, really, it's only a farmette. And besides, this gift is for both of us. So do you like the name? I figure, we need a catchy name if you're gonna sell your honey and eggs and stuff at the farmer's market like you always talk about. And Fowl Play's pretty cute, right, cuz of the chickens? I had a shirt made for you, too. I even thought of a motto!" He turns around to show Cas the back of the shirt. "'They lay, we play'. Huh?”
“We can workshop it,” Cas replies tartly, but Dean knows it'll stick.
Hot damn, he thinks. We're gonna buy ourselves a farm.
Concludes Continued here...
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friends with benefits - charles leclerc
summary: type A planner best friend lives with no thoughts head empty best friend and they decide to start sleeping together
request: 37 , 70, 78 w charles😃
prompts: 37) “Please? I'll be good, I promise!" 70) “we’re just…friends.” “friends don’t do this type of shit!” 78) “Not to make things weird, but I thought about you when I came last night.”
a/n: charles, head empty no thoughts just his hot roommate and his inability to keep things to himself
warnings: nsfw, 18+, angst kinda, friends to fuck buddies, oral sex
“Could you uhhhhh do me a favor?” You asked Charles. The fuzzy blanket was draped over both of you and he was about to press play on the movie.
His eyes rolled. “What do you need, my love?” He asked in a sarcastic tone.
“Can you maybe make some popcorn?” You tried to slow your words down a bit, for some reason thinking he would be more inclined to say yes if you asked like that.
He exhaled loudly. “Fine.” He tossed the blanket over to you so he could get up off the couch. “But only because now you’ve got that thought in my mind and I want it.”
“If doing things for yourself instead of me makes you feel better, that’s okay with me.” You smiled. This was a typical weeknight for the two of you.
You were a self proclaimed movie critic. Charles just got stuck with a self proclaimed movie critic as a roommate, but it made for some entertaining nights.
The two of you met in high school and immediately formed a bond. Everything between you two was easygoing and laid back, which he loved. He was never a huge people person or party type and neither were you.
You found peace in each other’s silent company and eventually realized you had more in common than you first thought. That following summer, you did practically everything together. Charles had a couple girlfriends here and there and you had a couple boyfriends as well, but it didn’t really matter. Nothing ever stuck.
College rolled around and you weren’t sure what to do. You wanted to stay in Monaco close to your family, but you just couldn’t live at home anymore. Lucky for you, Charles offered to let you move into his spare bedroom until you could make a decision. It had been years and you were still in that spare bedroom. The thought of moving out and doing something different hadn’t crossed your mind since the day you moved in.
“Do you want butter or no butter?” He asked from the kitchen, hands full of popcorn bags.
“Come on is that even a question?”
“Right. Butter. Lots of it.” He threw the bag into the microwave and it started to pop.
He came back with a bowl full of steaming popcorn and handed it to you.
“Be careful it’s,” he looked at you to see your mouth wide open and steam coming out, “hot.”
“Almost hotter than you,” you said once you caught your breath.
He rolled his eyes and fake laughed. “Hilarious, y/n.”
“I’m being serious.”
“C’mon, we’ve talked about this.”
“Doesn’t change the fact that I think you’re hot,” you said. Every time this was brought up, he got so flustered. Which was why you continued to joke around with him and flirt with him. He would never act on it.
“Y/n…. I’m gonna go to bed if you keep this up.” He was annoyed.
“I’m sorry. Please stay? I’ll be good, I promise.” You batted your eyelashes at him.
“Fine, but you gotta stop,” he said, pulling your legs onto his lap so you could lounge more comfortably.
A rom-com was playing on the TV and the sound of munching on popcorn was filling the room.
A long distance relationship played out on the screen. Lots of phone calls, lots of phone sex, lots of jerking off to each other’s photos. You shifted in your seat, trying to seem casual and not uncomfortable.
“Not to make things weird, but I thought about you when I came last night.” You stopped shifting and looked at Charles.
“So much for ‘we’ve talked about this’.” You held up air quotes. “Care to elaborate?” He was known for saying out of pocket things. Sometimes you weren’t sure if he fully thought things through before he said them.
“I mean, not really. The movie just reminded me of it.”
You couldn’t think of a response quick enough so he continued to talk. “You always say whatever’s on your mind so I thought I might try it out.”
“You don’t do that enough already?”
“I’m trying to be more honest.”
You laughed and rolled your eyes at him. “I applaud you for that. But you can’t just leave me hanging like this.”
“Don’t hate me, that’s all I’m going to say.” His hand rubbed up and down your shins that were resting on his lap.
“I could never hate you, Charles.”
“Last night when you took a shower, you left the bathroom door wide open. I was just walking back to my room from the kitchen, I didn’t mean to-”
You laughed and interrupted him. “Charles, it’s okay. That’s my fault.”
“I just glanced, I promise. But I couldn’t get the thought out of my mind. And my cock was still really hard after a while.”
“You knew I was awake, you should have come to my room,” you said. It sounded good in theory but if you were being honest with yourself, you wouldn’t know what to do if he showed up at your bedroom door with a boner.
“We’re just friends though. Friends don’t do that type of shit.” He took a deep breath and looked off in the distance. Anything to avoid eye contact.
“Says who?” He looked at you and tilted his head in confusion. “A lot of friends do that type of shit. There’s even a word for it.”
“Have you thought about this before?”
“Don’t tell me you haven’t… Charles, we’re two young twenty somethings that live together. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about what it would be like if we were sleeping together.”
“I don’t mean this in a bad way but I honestly didn’t think about it until I saw you.”
“Maybe it’s just the hopeless romantic in me.” You had thought about what a perfect storyline it would make for you two to sleep together but never the reality of actually getting into bed with him. Now that made you nervous.
“More like the horny romantic”
“Very funny…” You tossed a piece of popcorn at him and he swatted it away.
“So, are we doing this thing?” He turned his attention from the TV to you.
“Tell me you didn’t just actually ask me that question.” He was blunt and never beat around the bush.
“I did, and I would like an answer, please.” You wanted to smack that stupid smile off of his face for how he was making you feel.
“What’s this thing?” He needed to spell it out.
“Are you,” he pointed to you, “going to let me,” his finger moved to himself, “inside of you?”
You burst out laughing. “It’s a good thing you’re pretty. We need to set some ground rules for this.”
“Rules?” He didn’t look like he was a fan of rules. And as his roommate, you knew he wasn’t a fan of them. Just ask the groceries you’ve gone shopping for two months in a row.
“Our friendship, our cohabitation, you know. I’m not just going to let you go willy nilly on me without making sure you aren’t going to leave me friendless or homeless after.” Nothing could be done with you unless it was carefully planned. All possible outcomes had to be thought through.
“I would never leave you friendless or homeless.”
“Even if I was the worst person at sex, in the world, ever?”
“I highly doubt you’re the worst, but even if you were.”
“You’d still fuck me, even if everyone in the entire world was better than me. Damn I’m lucky.”
“Here’s a rule for you. You need to tell me how it feels. I’ll fuck you however you want to be fucked so you better tell me when something feels good.” Charles said.
“I can do that. If you like something I do, tell me. If you don’t, tell me.” You talked a big game but telling Charles how he made you feel sexually made your spine tingle, and you weren’t sure if it was anxiety or desire.
“I doubt there’s anything you can do to my body that I won’t like.” he said, wiggling his eyebrows. He was a guy after all.
“You wanna bet?” You asked, lunging at him jokingly.
“Sure, I’d like to see you try.”
“I guess I will, then.” You just needed time to plan it first.
He stood up and held out his hand for you to take. “Now that we’ve talked about it, I can’t get it off my mind.”
“You want to do this, right now?” Panic set in. This was too sudden.
“Right now,” he said, confidently. “If, that’s what you want, of course.”
“Okay.” You followed him into the hallway, bypassing your bedroom and ending up in his.
You took a few shy steps around, like you’d never been in there before. “Do you want to get on top or do you want me to?”
“Y/n…” He needed you to just relax and let go.
“Right, right, let’s just do it.” You took a step forward and he grabbed your face in his hands. Your lips moved with his, feeling soft and warm. There was only so much in your life you could plan. This was never part of it.
He slowly guided you to his bed and gently pushed you backwards. His shirt slid over his head and you admired his body, looking at him in a different light. He never took his shirt off around you with sexual intentions but this was new. And fun.
You smiled at him, both of you acknowledging what you were about to do. It made you explode inside thinking about how much you were enjoying this, letting someone else take control and letting go. You shouldn’t be enjoying this, you thought. Snap out of it.
“Before we start, is there anything you really don’t like?” He asked, reaching for the button of your denim shorts. You nodded side to side, giving him permission to pull the shorts down your legs.
He immediately pulled your thong aside and slipped a finger between your folds. He smiled feeling the wetness. “Thinking about us fucking is turning you on, isn’t it?”
“Don’t embarrass me,” you shot him a look and he understood.
“I’m not embarrassing you. It’s sexy.” He kneeled between your legs on the floor.
“Well, keep it to yourself,” you said.
“Why would I keep it to myself when I have physical proof that thinking about us is turning you on?” One of his fingers easily slid inside of you and your hips shifted as you rolled your eyes at him. “Is this okay?” He asked, concerned by your movements.
“Yes,” you said, unsure of what else to say. You didn’t want to give him any more ammo to make fun of you. You told each other everything but this was one side of you he never saw, and you didn’t think he ever would. Vulnerability at its finest, but you agreed to this.
His finger moved in and out of you and the sounds of your wet pussy made you want to cover your face and hide. He added a second and slowly curled his fingers up to hit your g-spot. A soft moan escaped your lips despite the fact that you were trying hard to keep them to yourself.
“Tell me how it feels.” He said.
“It feels,” you took a moment to breathe in, “so good.” He used his other hand to play with your clit, causing you more pleasure. You were looking at the ceiling, finding it hard to acknowledge that Charles was the one making you feel like this. If you squeezed your eyes shut hard enough, maybe this wouldn’t be something you needed to worry about.
A euphoric feeling began to build in your stomach, your legs slowly going numb in the best way possible. You continued to try and hold in your moans but when you hit your climax, everything was uncontrollable. Your body jerked and moans fell as you rode out your high.
You opened your eyes to see Charles pulling his fingers out and smiling. He made you feel that way and while you lay half naked on his bed post-orgasm, it was starting to feel okay. How much more vulnerable could you get with him than this?
He stood up and pulled his sweatpants off, his hard cock springing out of his cotton boxers. Your jaw dropped and you couldn’t help but stare as he stroked himself, preparing for you. He noticed, but ignored it, granting your request of not embarrassing you. The look he shot you was enough to know that he was aware of your stares.
“I’m only gonna say it one more time,” he said, leaning on top of you with his hands on either side of your head. “You need to tell me how it feels, or I’m going to start talking really dirty with you.”
You laughed, feeling more relaxed than before. “I almost want to keep quiet on purpose just to see that.”
He dipped his head in disappointment. “Not funny.”
“I think I’m pretty funny.”
“You are, but I want to make you feel good. I’d rather know then instead of you telling me I sucked after.”
“Okay, okay,” you obliged. He nodded and positioned himself at your entrance, slowly pushing himself inside of you.
You had to adjust to his size - his dick was nothing like his fingers. He didn’t give you much time before he started moving and you didn’t even care. He felt so good inside of you and seeing his body on top of you was putting you at ease rather than stressing you out, like you had expected it to.
His head rested in the crook of your neck, giving you perfect access to his ear. Almost like he did it on purpose, to make you more comfortable. You didn’t have to look at him in the eyes and admit how good he was making you feel. “Your dick feels so good,” you whispered in his ear and he grunted in response.
“You’re so tight, fuck,” he said into your ear, slightly nibbling on the lobe.
His hips moved rhythmically while you lifted your feet onto his back to change the angle. You couldn’t help but let more moans slip out at the feeling. “I think I’m gonna cum,” you said, quietly.
“Let go,” he said followed by a few expletives. His pelvis ground into you, creating a sensation on your clit you’ve never experienced.
You felt your second orgasm of the night build up as he continued to fuck you, keeping the same pace. You held your hands on his back and let moans fall to his ear making sure he knew how good you felt.
He pulled out of you and your body felt like deadweight. You were glued to the bed and couldn’t find the energy to get up. “How was that?” He asked. Of course he couldn’t give you a second to recover before opening his mouth.
“Great,” you smiled, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Did you finish?” You sure hadn’t felt him cum inside of you and you don’t think he wore a condominium either.
“No, but I just wanted to make sure you felt good.” He picked his sweatpants up off the floor and went to put his boxers back on before you stopped him.
“Unacceptable. I’m not going to let you jerk off thinking about me two nights in a row. Especially not after I was just naked in your bed.” Your post-orgasm confidence was showing when you dropped to your knees in front of him and took his still hard cock in your hand.
Slick juices still covered it, making it easier for you once you took him in your mouth. He was bigger than you expected, so you started swirling your tongue around the tip while your hand worked at the rest of him. “Shit,” you could hear him say.
You slowly took more of him, hollowing out your cheeks in response to his moans. His hand found the back of your head but rested there, not wanting to pressure you for more but he couldn’t resist once you fit almost all of him in your mouth.
The sounds he made caused butterflies in your stomach knowing that you were the sole reason for those sounds. His grip got tighter on you and he started to thrust into you when you felt a warm liquid shoot down your throat.
His eyes rolled to the back of his head and he grunted while you took every last drop. You stood up and took a step back, swiping your finger over your bottom lip.
He looked at you with the same eyes you looked at him after he finished fucking you. “So, uh,” he said. “Where do we go from here?”
You nervously looked around the room. “Should we finish the movie?”
“Great idea.”
You both put your clothes back on and sat back on the couch. “Let’s talk about that.” He never knew when to shut up, but sometimes it was for the better.
“What about it?”
“Did you like it? Should we do it again? Do you want to move out?” You laughed at his last question.
“It was really good,” you said, your thoughts wandering to just a few moments ago. You wouldn’t mind having him on top of you again. “We might as well.”
“Just one more thing,” he said. “Don’t fall in love with me.” He smiled and let out a giggle. You weren’t sure if he was being serious or not, but you laughed along too.
#f1 imagine#charles leclerc smut#f1 smut#f1 x reader#f1 blurb#smut prompts#f1 fanfic#charles leclerc prompt#charles leclerc blurb#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#cl
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Mc falling asleep next to them
Lucifer:
he had been working nonstop for hours now and the pile of yet to be read and signed documents wasn't getting any smaller
you had been sitting in his study silently working on your own assignments, that was until you've finished them about an hour ago
pacing his room in boredom and looking at the stuff he keeps in his closets (mostly books, records and demonus)
"Could you stop wandering around, you're irritating me!" Lucifer is stressed, annoyed, etc and your sighs, constant footsteps and opening and closing of closet doors, didn't help him to concentrate
you could have left the room and found something else to do, but you were determined to spend some time with him, as the evening work hours are quite literally the only hours where you can be alone with him
so instead you seeked permission for putting on a record to have at least some entertainment, which was both a good and a bad choice at the same time
yes you had something to enjoy and relax to, but the relaxing part worked a little bit too well
after a good ten minutes you were sleeping peacefully, stretched out all over his sofa with no care in the world
"I'm going to take a small break and get some coffee. Do you want something as well?" Lucifer asked only to be met with silence, which he didn't appreciate
he was about scold you for being rude, when his gaze fell on your sleeping form and the words seemed stuck in his throat
how could you sleep so peacefully right next to one of the strongest demons of hell, he honestly didn't know if he was pleased you found comfort in his presence or if he should be annoyed that you don't take him serious enough
nonetheless you seemed to have a good sleep and as this is often near impossible in the House of Lamentation, he decided to let you sleep
he got himself his coffee and once back in his study he moved his workplace to the small coffee table and took a seat next to you on the sofa
he adjusted your form so you weren't hanging half of the edge and put his coat over your sleeping form for some warmth
"Foolish little lamb, letting your guard down in a house of wolves, good thing I'm here to protect you..."
Mammon:
"And then I, the Great Mammon, made an action movie worthy escape and totally didn't run away in a panic, because Lucifer was chasing me..."
he had been telling you how exactly he got into the situation of hanging from the ceiling once again, as you've tried as careful as possible to cut him free, which was harder then expected with the way he kept moving around
once finally free, he dropped onto the ground, whining about the rope burns he got basically all over his body, though demons heal quicker, it still wasn't a nice feeling
with a sigh you offered him your hand and pulled him up and away to your room to give him some of the salve Satan had made you the last time you had accidentally cut yourself while cooking
you sat a flustered Mammon onto your bed while you went ahead and searched through your bathroom cabinets that were filled with products Asmo had gifted you, when you finally found it you asked Mammon to hold still while you put some salve onto his burned skin
"W-what?! N-no way! I don't need your help, I can do that on my own!" and with that Mammon stormed away with your salve and locked himself into your bathroom
you knew better then to argue at this point, Mammon would do what Mammon wants to do...until he fails and seeks protection behind your back...
be it because he is embarrassed, doesn't know how to open the salve tube, or because there were so many rope burns...but Mammon took quite long to apply the crème, leaving you to wait for him for at least half an hour now
helping out Mammon can become quite tiring, not that you mind helping him or don't like being around him, but a nap sounds nice right now
and so you lay down in your bed, it is after all your room, and just because Mammon is currently camping out in your bathroom, doesn't mean that you can't take a nap
Mammon comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later, he probably needed a few more minutes to build up courage to face and thank you, but he is met with the sight of you sleeping on your bed
Mammons brain is working overdrive, trying to figure out if he should leave the room quietly, wake you up or stay and watch over you...then again he doesn't want to be seen as a creep by you, but he can't deny that he would like to stay with you
he carefully climbs into bed and pushes you a bit further in so you sleep on the wall side and don't fall off in case you move, it takes five more minutes until Mammon risks putting his arm around you all while holding his breath in anticipation of your rejection, when none comes he settles a little closer to you and falls asleep as well
"Don't worry my human, the Great Mammon is gonna keep you warm and protected in your sleep!"
Bonus: even though you two fall asleep next to each other with only Mammons arm wrapped around you, expect him to wake up on top of you holding you like your his pillow
Leviathan:
it was 5am and Levi and you were currently waiting in line in front of a shop to get your hands on a new limited edition Ruri-Chan figurine
surprisingly enough even though you turned up quite early, there were a good amount of people in front of you
the shop would only open a 9am so you still had a long time to queue in the coldness of the devildom morning
"Ah that is not fair! We planned everything so carefully, it was the perfect timing, why aren't we first in line?" Levi complained while standing on his tiptoes to be able to see and count the demons in front of him, coming to the conclusion that if everyone were to buy one figurine he'd still be able to buy one for himself...and whatever you might want
you weren't the happiest when he told you about his plan a few weeks prior and getting woken up this early you might have been a little slower than usual in getting yourself ready, now that you were here you couldn't help but feel a little guilty
you tried to cheer Levi up with the argument that if you were longer in line that also meant you could spend more time together, which resulted in Levi turning into a blushing but happy mess
you put down the blanket you've brought and made yourself comfortable on it, Levi joining you but looking a bit stiff from the closeness
you ate a breakfast consisting out of sandwiches made with whatever was left after Beels midnight snack, which wasn't much but better than nothing
afterwards as there was still a lot of time to pass you started to play some games on his Switch, trying to stay awake
the emphasis lies on 'trying', because after 2 hours or so you start to fall asleep, eyelids and limbs heavy, you don't have the energy left in you to fight the sleep and so you nod off, your head falling onto Levis shoulder who had been inching closer over the period of time...to be able to better see the Switch display not to be closer to you...
Levi.exe has stopped working
there he sits red as a tomato with Mc sleeping on his shoulder, the queue in front of him starts to pack up and move as the shop gets ready to open up, his Switch display is showing the game over screen, his mind feels fogged over and he has no idea how to react now
Mc just fell asleep and Levi feels guilty to wake them...but they have to move...
"H-hey Mc? T-the line i-is moving? Wake up....please..." his attempts are way to quiet for you to hear and even as he gently shakes your shoulder you do not wake, leaving Levi quiet in a dilemma
"N-no other choice..." he says as he packs up the stuff alone, leaving only you sitting on the cold floor...he can't just leave you here..
Levi turns into his demon form, his hands shaking and eyes flitting across your from and over the crowd of other demons, before he carefully lifts you into his arm, his tail wrapping around you as well for more stabilization, so he has one hand free to carry his shopping bag later
he never bought something faster than that day, he got his figurine and even bought you some anime merch he knew you had stated to like, all while feeling like he was running the worst fever of his life and receiving stares, giggles and smug smiles from way too may people, that was enough attention for at least a century for Levi...but he did like holding you in his arms
"This is not fair! I have to deal with all the embarrassment while you sleep...but I guess it's okay if it's for you..."
Satan:
Satans last anger fit had caused way more damage than usually, it had taken place in the library when Mammon had tried to steal a very rare book about spells, to sell it after he found out how rare it actually is...now that lead to Satan throwing down and emptying almost all bookshelves and kicking Mammon through the room
While Mammon was strung upside down from the ceiling, Satan was forced to clean up the library alone, but you had pity on him as there were quite a lot to clean up, if Lucifer doesn't find out you helped there will be no consequences
Satans opinion about you helping was split, first of all he was really thankful for the help even though he was at fault for the chaos, having to clean up all alone was a bit much, but on second thought Satan was worried that you tried to go against Lucifers orders, he's proud of you for defying his eldest brother but also feels like it's a stupid idea
but you have made your mind up and so while Satan repairs and stands up the shelves, you begin to put the books in, you might not know the exact way they stood like Satan, but for now getting them off the floor is the priority
there aren't many words spoken as you silently work away, only once in a while you point out a book which got a bit more damage, the cover hanging off loosely or a few pages ripped out, you two decide depending on the damage if it can be fixed or not
every now and then Satan asks you to hold a piece of a shelf together while he fixes it, he is surprisingly fast and knows exactly how to repair it...just as if he had to do it more than once in a while...
"Oh Mc? Can you give me the screwdriver? No no that one, the one with the cross head is what I need..." you had no idea there were so many different tools, and wouldn't be the slotted one sufficient if you just angled it right? Satan just laughs and let's you try it for yourself, only for you to fail, he then shows you how to do it correctly guiding you through fixing your first shelf
"The last shelf is standing again, I'll help you with the book now." Satan pointed out, a small ray of hope now that only the books were left, you didn't reply, which honestly wasn't really necessary, but a small affirming noise would have been nice, so Satan tries to keep the 'conversation' going, while he works on the books with his back turned to you
"...you're still ignoring me? Are you angry at me for making such a mess? You know you didn't have to help...you can go, no need to act like all high and mighty!" he was getting angry again, yes he did make a mess, but he didn't do anything to you! Had he? He couldn't remember, but humans might interpret actions and words differently…he didn't want you to be mad at him, and neither did he want to get angry at you, but with you ignoring him it became quite difficult to keep his voice low
having enough and wanting to make up before it gets worse, he makes his way over to you, who was leaning against a shelf with a book in your hand
as he sits down next to you and turns your body to him through a guiding hand on your shoulder, he startles, you fell asleep in a sitting position? That sounds more like something Belphie would do...Isn't that uncomfortable?
You must have been exhausted after filling up three shelves of books and fell asleep midway on your fourth shelf, Satan chuckles amused and relieved you aren't mad at him but simply sleeping
He picks you up and brings you to your room where he lies you down in your bed, covering you with the blanket and hesitantly stroking your hair before going back to cleaning up the library
"Thank you for being so patient with me and helping me! You can rest now and I'll make it up to you later!"
Bonus: he will most definitely take you out on a date of your choice, even if he doesn't enjoy the idea as much as you
Asmodeus:
Asmo had taken you out shopping, as he claimed his wardrobe was not having the right clothes anymore so he had to get new ones fast
he had dragged you through town for the whole day and you two only returned home late in the afternoon, you completely exhausted and ready to drop in your bed, while Asmo while being slightly tired, still insisted on putting on all the clothes and showing them off to you and his followers on Devilgram
he entrusted you with his D.D.D to take some nice amazing shots of him to gain even more followers, though that seemed impossible as it already felt as if the whole population of hell was already subscribed to his account
but as long as all you had to do was hold the D.D.D up and click the screen for a picture, you were fine, you sat down on Asmos bed trying not to disturb the bags of clothes that lay there as well
Asmos screen lit up nearly every few seconds with a new message, how did this man not get crazy with all the message?! And he must check them all, because whenever you write him, he is on and writing back instantly...maybe you should steal his D.D.D from time to time to get him away from it...
While Asmo was changing into new clothes in the bathroom, you could hear him humming a happy tune, clearly in his element and enjoying his time, which made you happy as well, but the exhaustion was still plaguing you and the bed felt unbelievably comfy and on top of that the humming of Asmo was slowly lulling you into sleep
"Oooh Mc~ I especially like this top! Just look how nicely it fits, it shows of my best parts, which are all of me haha...hey Mc?~ Look at me!" Asmo pouted as you stayed put on his bed, and climbed over your form, already expecting you to start pushing him off, only to get concerned when you don't
then he sees your eyes are closed and you seem to be peacefully asleep, he instantly coos at your sweet sleeping expression, the back of his hand caresses you cheeks softly, but you don't react much besides moving a bit into am ore comfy position
Asmo backs off and begins to put down his bags, then he tucks you under his covers and climbs right in with you, pulling you close so that you lie on his chest, his arms encircling you to keep you put
the pictures for Devilgram are forgotten for now, they're not running away anyway, you two can continue another time, but for a beauty nap sounds good
"Oh Mc! You look so cute when you're sleeping...next time tell me you need a break, I'm happy to cuddle you while you're recovering!"
Beelzebub:
you had decided to stay a bit longer at RAD today, because you still had something to discuss with one of the teacher, as well as doing some research for an essay that was due next week
most of the brothers had already left for home or different work related activities, except Beel who had Fangol practice today after school, and as you were not allowed to walk around the Devildom without someone accompanying you for protection, all that was left for you was to wait for Beel to finish his practice, which usually took place for about two hours
you sat down on one of the benches at the side of the field, waving to Beel so he knew you where you were and could keep an eye on you
you worked away on your homework and checked you D.D.D from time to time replying to all the messages you got
the practice seemed to be still not finished even after two hours had passed and you were getting a bit tired from sitting around, but you also couldn't just wander off, Beel might start worry...plus the risk of running into a less friendly demon was still a thing
so you shifted from one position into another not really being able to get comfortable on the hard wooden bench
the ground seemed to be comfier with every minute passing, and so you lay down ignoring the weird looks of the team and trainers, you're body simply wasn't made to sit on this bench longer than necessary
"Here you can wrap yourself in this...it's getting cold. Training is almost over, just hold out a few more minutes!" Beel came over and gave you his jacket and you quickly put it on revelling in his warmth
but here is the problem the jacket made you feel so comfortable that you fell asleep, right on the floor next to a few dozen demons
"We're finished! I'm hungry, let's go get something to eat, any wishes what you want?" Beel was packing his stuff and rambling on about how he could eat at least one year worth of food, training having starved him quite a lot
but when you didn't respond he grew worried and kneeled down next to you, gently resting his hand on your side, he simply laughed when he saw you fell asleep, he is used to it due to Belphie, so he carefully picks you up and carries you home, deciding to order food once there
just Beel giving you a piggy back home, softly smiling to himself and being happy you've come to be so at ease around demons..still at bit worried, but he'll protect you, no worries
"I'll stay by your side until you wake up...and then we can eat lots of good food...please just don't sleep too long or I might have to eat before you wake up."
Belphegor:
so there he was, sleeping, on your bed, in your room, without an invitation...and honestly it wasn't even a surprise anymore, coming home after a work shift at Hell's Kitchen and just wanting to sleep, but no there was no space for you on the bed
I have no idea how, but he manages to occupy the whole bed, and hog blanket and pillows to himself as well
if only he was easy to wake, just to tell him to move over, but no he wouldn't wake up unless you pulled the big guns and nobody wants to face the consequences after one dumped water bottle on his head, it would be a hundred times easier and less dangerous to wake Satan
but you were really tired and just wanted to cuddle into your bed, maybe you could maneuver him with a bit strength..actually forget that...you could always call Beel for help to carry him to his own bed, but by the way he was clinging to your blanket and pillows, that would only end in a empty mattress to sleep on and then you would get cold...
honestly it was his own fault at this point you had threatened him to do it, but he had just laughed it off...
and so you climbed into bed and lay down on top of him, wrapping your arms around him so that you would get at least his body warmth if not the blanket
to your surprise he didn't wake up and he was really comfy, his rhythmic breathing was really relaxing and it didn't take you long to fall asleep
after some time Belphie wakes up with you wrapped around him, he quickly realises that you're asleep, but is stunned nonetheless that you would actually have the guts to sleep on top of him with the risk of waking him up in a bad mood
"That's quite bold of you! You didn't think I will let that slip though, right?" he chuckles amused but shifts nonetheless to make room for you, his embrace is tight, and he hopes just a little bit that you wake up, so he can tease you, but you stay asleep looking content with your new position
"I suppose I could go for another nap...now that I have my favourite pillow with me, sleeping will be even better!" he cuddles you, just like the blanket and pillows...which you don't get any of by the way, but you get Belphie so that's even better, he's gonna keep you warm, don't worry
"You're such a odd human...no idea why I like you...anyway just stay here in my arms and sleep!"
Diavolo:
yesterday was amazing, Dia had taken you to a trip in the human world and you had showed him around, visiting as many places as you two could
what you didn't know was that he had actually sneaked out of the castle to spend time with you
well you didn't know until a very angry Barbatos opened a portal right in front of you two and started lecturing Dia for at least one hour
you felt a bit guilty that you were the indirect cause of this and quickly apologised to him promising to make it up
so here you were in Dias office, overseeing him to do his work so he couldn't sneak out again and Barb didn't have to find him
after all if the reason for sneaking out was right in his room then he had no reason to go, besides the intimidating amount of work left on his desk after yesterdays excurse
Dia worked concentrated for most of the time, only now and then staring out of the window or talking to you
"Isn't it boring to watch me work? I can work alone, I promise to run away...or else Barbatos might get a heart attack from shock of seeing me gone again" he chuckled while signing another document
you reassured you didn't mind sitting next to him in silence, you had a good book borrowed from Satan, tea and cookies from Barbatos and you could stare at Diavolo all day long
your last statement made Dia flush red quite quickly and he tried to distract himself with his work, he slouched over in his chair trying to escape your gaze, but you were having none of it
your arms snaked around his waist and your head came to lean on his shoulder, Dia stiffened not sure how to react he liked the feeling of you hugging him, but now he was scared to move too much as not to disturb you or accidentally hit you with his elbow while trying to write
after a few more documents his eyes flit over to your face, cheek squished against his shoulder, eyes closed and breathing calmly
"Mc? Are.. are you sleeping?" he is whispering trying not to be too loud in case you are truly sleeping, and that you are! A soft smile graces his lips, nobody was ever this relaxed around him, he is proud and wants you to stay asleep as long as possible
he keeps working until Barbatos knocks on the door, coming in and announcing to have brought more tea, only to stop when he sees the sight in front him, Mc holding onto Dia, head resting on his shoulder and sleeping, while Dia put his finger to his lips to tell him not to be too loud
you sleep for an hour or so until Dia really has to move, apologising multiple times for having to wake you
"I'm glad you're able to relax around me, please continue to be yourself! My shoulder is always there for you to nap!"
Barbatos:
"You liked the cake that much? I'm flattered! I could teach you how to make it if you'd like?"
you had been over for tea at the castle and the chocolate cake with black-as-hell cherries was the best cake you've ever ate, it was bittersweet in taste not too much sweetness and not too much bitterness, paired with the melting chocolate, you could have eaten the whole cake on your own
you doubt you'd be able to get the same ingredients in the human realm but maybe you could find similar ones, so you were more than willing to learn with Barbatos
and so you arranged to meet the next Sunday afternoon for a baking session
Barb let you into the castle already awaiting you at the door even though you were early
you two worked on the cake, Barb explaining each step carefully, even for the easiest steps he takes his time to explain and help you, being very patient with you no matter how much you screw up
"Next we have to melt the chocolate in a pot. Wait a minute I turn on the stove for you" while you put the chocolate pieces into a pot, Barb moves behind you and turns on the stove, his arms brushing your sides, yet he stays fully focused, what can't be said for you
the cake is put together quickly with you two working together and while it bakes in the oven and the chocolate is meting, you two go ahead and start cutting and coring the rest of the cherries to decorate the cake later
"Here have a taste, they're bitter at first but the aftertaste is nicely sweet!" He holds out a cored cherry for you to taste and eats one himself, smiling gently at you while you sniff at the fruit first, which smells exactly like a normal human world cherry
the only thing left to do is wait for the cake so you two sit down for some tea at a small table in the kitchen, talking about the week, when Diavolo calls for Barb and he quickly excuses himself to help the prince out
the sweet aroma of the baking cake, the warmth of the tea and the very comfy chair you're sitting in, are a dangerous combination making you fall asleep
as Barb returns he sees you with your head lying on your folded arms on the table, clearly asleep, Barb decides to eave you there while cleans the kitchen and checks on the cake half an hour later
"Mc? The cake is ready to be decorated do you want sleep or do you want to help me?" somewhat embarrassed you stand up and help him with the decorations , Barb acts if nothing happened but he can't help but think about your gentle expression while you slept
"Next time I'll let you sleep longer... I wouldn't mind if you visited me for your naps if that meant I could see you more often."
Solomon:
learning magic was many things: exciting, frustrating, dangerous, fun...but sometimes it also was unbelievable boring
like when you think about magic, you think about casting charms, curses, making potions and all that stuff, but nobody told you that beforehand you have to learn everything about the new spell or etc in theory!
so here you were sitting with Solomon as he rambled on about how while the shrinking charm could have really bad side effects if casted wrong, sure it was important to know how to cast it correctly but did you really have to listen on to everything that might go wrong?
listening to all this just make you feel less confident, I mean technically you were practicing with a tea cup to shrink, so shrinking only a part of it wouldn't be too bad of a side effect, but what if you used too much pressure and made the cup explode and you'd hurt Solomon in the process?!
You took a deep breath, which made Solomon stop talking as he looked at you questioningly
"Anything wrong? Already giving up? Is it toom much?" his light teasing was meant to make you relax, but all you could do was give a small, stiff smile, signalling for him to continue and he did, after messing up your hair with his hand giving you a huge grin, but he talked slower now giving you more glances to make sure you were still alright
"How about a small break? I'll make us some tea..." he stood up and made some tea...in a beaker over a Bunsen burner..this weirdo..
the tea didn't taste weird though, it was just normal tea, even though the preparation would have made Barbatos get a stroke
after the break he was back to full tutor mode and your concentration slipped with each new word, until your head falls down, your chin resting on your chest comfortably, you had fallen asleep right before him
Solomon notices instantly that you're asleep and starts laughing so loud that you wake up again, he is crying and gasping for breath at your flustered state and you hit for good measurement on the arm
"Am I that boring? Fine if you're tired you can rest on my bed. I'll read you a bedtime spell book..." he doesn't stop laughing and teases you endlessly, you better be on your toes around him, you won't be hearing the end of this
"Hey sleepyhead? Do you want me to read you into boredom? I won't take pictures of your sleeping and drooling self...No promises made though..."
Simeon:
He was staring blankly at his manuscript, writers block had been plaguing him for quite some while now, but the new chapter had to be sent to the company until next week
you had offered to help him out maybe you could give him some ideas, so he invited you over and let you read the latest chapter so you'd know what had happened
you sat in his room brainstorming ideas on a small extra sheet trying your best to help Simeon out who looked quite lost
"Do you think that would work? Doesn't if feel a bit too rushed? But maybe if we combined these two ideas together..." he seemed to had found something and began to roughly write up a plan for his further writings
he continuously asked you questions about the smallest details, it was kind of cute that he relied so much on you, he probably could have done the rest himself as well, yet he kept involving you into the whole process
while his one hand scribbled like a madman, his other rested on your arm occasionally lightly squeezing it, reminding you that he didn't forget about you
you slowly fell asleep, the sounds of each others breathing, the pen scratching over paper and the ticking of the clock hanging on the wall, the inly sounds to be heard
"What about this part? How do you think it could go from here?...Mc?" he wasted no time in making sure you were lying comfortably, putting his cloak over your form and still squeezing your arm from time to time while he continued to write late into the night
only then did he notice, the brothers might worry about your absence, should he wake and bring you home? or should he let you sleep here and inform Lucifer about your safety? but the sofa you were currently sitting on, would make your back hurt if you continued to sleep here
it took him some time debating with himself, but came to the conclusion to carry you to his bed and tuck you in, giving you a forehead kiss like he was used to with Luke, only to realise what he'd done and quickly scrambling away in embarrassment to give Lucifer a quick call about the situation
"Have sweet dreams my lamb! I'll be guarding you in any realm, even the dream realm!"
Luke:
Luke, Simeon and you were having a small movie evening, watching some old Disney movies
Simeon didn't allow you to watch something else to protect Luke, but you didn't mind too much
you were having some freshly made desserts by Luke who had worked on them the whole day, as he was very excited for your meetup
you watched a few movies, talking, laughing and joking together, just having fun
"Huh? They called the mean cat Lucifer? Hahah how fitting, he kind of even looks like the real Lucifer! Ah, don't tell him that though!" Luke really liked to compare the different characters to the people he knows, but when there actually were a cat called Lucifer he was quite surprised...who would want their cute pet to be called like a demon? Why not call them angel names? Michael is a pretty cool name...
over the time you became more and more tired and Simeon seemed to notice, suggesting on stopping for today and continuing another time, but Luke convinced you two of one more movie
unfortunately you didn't last the final movie and fell asleep cuddled underneath the blanket between Simeon and Luke
Luke took some time to notice, only seeing it when he turned to you wanting to tell you his opinion about the last scene
"Oh! Simeon... Mc fell asleep..." Simeon already knew, as you had fallen onto his shoulder, not that he minded, he just told Luke to stay quiet and watch the rest of the movie
Luke cuddled up to you to keep you warm and occasionally glanced at you to make sure you were okay, and there cuddled next to you he as well fell asleep...trapping Simeon underneath your combined weight, making it impossible for Simeon to get out of the bed, so you three just slept together that night
"Don't worry Mc! I'll keep all demons away from you while you sleep!"
#obey me headcanons#obey me#swd obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me belphegor#obey me beelzebub#obey me simeon#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#obey me luke#obey me solomon#obey me shall we date#headcanon
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What are the demon brothers really, especially good at when it comes to their obsession/possessive nature over their darling? Like, who’s really good at setting up an escape proof room, who’s the best at gaslighting their darling to hell and back, who’s got the most roofies they can slip into drinks and food so they can cuddle a sleepy darling. I hope any of this makes sense…
I'd like to think that in an ideal horrible world, they would realize that they all have to work together to keep MC with them, so as you've said each of them would be good at different things.
Lucifer would definitely 100% be the one to set up an escape proof room. In fact, I'm in the midst of writing a sequel to spirit guardian and in it Lucifer traps you in a special room he's prepared for you. From one of the in-game chats it's mentioned that Lucifer is the possessive type while Diavolo is the stalker type and Barbatos is... well-adjusted?! and with his tendency to prepare in advance, he'd be done with a specialized, well-hidden room even before anyone else had the idea of making you stay with them, permanently.
After all, didn't he keep Belphegor, one of the strongest demons in hell, up in the attic with little to no trouble? His enchantments are top notch; say hello to your new attic room, MC. Don't worry, it's comfortable and people can still visit you, and it's decorated almost the same as your kitchen room! And, if you're good, you might get let out!
Asmodeus would be good at charming and gaslighting to make things seem like they aren't as bad as they are. At first he seems like he's listening to you, as you scream and shout, he really does look like he's empathizing! And then once you're tired, he'd hold you and shush you and say, yes, Lucifer really is too much, yes, how could his brothers just lock you up like this, yes, you deserve to go out, he'll take you for a walk tomorrow! He'll ask Lucifer for permission, and Lucifer's bound to say yes especially if he realizes how sad you are! He's just a little frustrated now, you know that the Devildom is a dangerous place and we don't want you to get hurt! We only want you to be safe, you know that right? We love you, so we just want the best for you. I'm sure you can understand that! Can't you? So just stay in this room, alright? We're doing this for you, after all.
Leviathan's pretty good at guilt-tripping you as well. He just throws a big pity fest and you'll just rush to try and placate him, telling him no, he's not trash, you don't hate him. And he'll ask you if it's something he did, that made you want to leave them all so badly? Or if it's something they did in general. They can change, please, as long as you stay. MC, they can't live without you. MC, what are they going to do when you're gone? They can barely function without you. Besides, did people in the human world even realize that you were gone? They didn't even leave one message for you (didn't get a chance to, all communications were removed before they could even send anything), but the demon brothers would! They think about you every single day, the human world doesn't know what they have, they don't appreciate you, they don't care about you, but we do, MC. We're the only ones who care about you.
Apart from that he also installs cameras all over the House of Lamentations, especially near the exits and in your room, as well as bug your phone. He'll always be watching your every move, oftentimes even forgoing anime to just stare at you through the screen hours on end.
Satan is in charge of security. It's a responsibility he shares with Lucifer and he hates it, but he understands the importance of it. It's essential that no one can get into the house and, more importantly, that you can't get out. He has everything from tracking to sedation spells on you, ready to be activated at a moment's notice. He also took the liberty to enter the human world to track down everyone who ever knew you, private investigator style, and erase their memory of your existence. It's a subtle erase, too, like you're aware that the person exists, but they don't seem to be very important to you. You have better things to do than think about them. Once he's managed to manipulate the memories of everyone, then maybe you'll be allowed a little trip to the human world... just for you to see that the only place you truly belong is with them.
Beelzebub is the one in charge of physically restraining you if you ever get strange ideas in your head. You thought that he was a softie, that he would be the one you could break through to, to let you go, but he and his family were united in this particular decision to keep you by their side. You were, after all, a lot safer here in the Devildom than you were in the human world. What if you fell ill? Or someone attacked you? They wouldn't be able to reach you in time! Beel wouldn't be able to reach you in time, and he doesn't think he would be able to live with himself if he lost another person he loved. His family wouldn't be able to take it either. So he is quiet even though you scream and thrash in his grip, thrown over his shoulder, mouth gagged so that you were unable to command anyone to let you go. Your resistance hurts, but he knew it would be worth it in the end, and soon you'll realize that too.
Belphegor was another person you thought you could negotiate with, having been trapped in the attic himself. However, like Beelzebub, you could not be further from the truth. After millenniums of hurt and hatred, here you were, a ray of light into their world, a little piece of heaven just for them. He'd be damned he he were to let you go. You made Beel happy too, so you really were a fool to think that you could have convinced him otherwise.
He was in charge of dreams. The sleeping mind is malleable to suggestion and your dreams are no different. Most of the time he'll give you nice dreams. Warm memories from the past to remind you why you should stay, digging into your fantasies to play them out (the ones that involve the Devildom anyway) to give you incentive to stick around, and sometimes even raunchy dreams to ease you into the future... But sometimes he would give nightmares and all of the nightmares have one thing in common: they begin with you successfully running away from them. Different things will go wrong in your nightmare, from your family members not recognizing you or caring about you and being painfully alone, to being murdered or being kidnapped. All he needed to do was to plant a seed in your mind, that would take root and sprout...
Mammon was the last one to be on board with this plan. To the very end he still cared about your well-being above all else and when he realized that his brothers were never going to let you go, he stopped bargaining for your freedom. In the end, he was still selfish enough to want you to stay with him and, well, it's not like you'd be able to hide from his brothers anyway. So why not just give in and make life easier for yourself? And somehow, he would be the one to break you, even if he doesn't know it. His nonchalant attitude to the whole thing... He had been on your side at first but then he just... gave up?
He'd end up as another gaslighter, telling himself that he was doing it out of good intentions just like the rest of them. He would try to convince you to take it easy, take one day at a time. If you were good, then Lucifer would tell the brothers to give you more freedom! No one knew Lucifer's bottom line like Mammon, so just listen and do as he says! Life doesn't have to be miserable, it's all up to you!
Days pass, and then years... and you realize that you aren't aging. In a manner similar to Solomon, your pacts were keeping you alive and immortal. You would not die.
And, at the very end of the line, all you would have left would be those demon brothers you once called friends.
#obey me#obey me x reader#yandere obey me#ask#anon#iyumeu asks#lucifer x reader#beelzebub x reader#asmodeus x reader#satan x reader#leviathan x reader#mammon x reader
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I'm not allowed to come up with prompts bc I just find rabbitholes instead. it was "Bon if we turn the pages of you book can we paint you nails?" to 'where did the sleepover get the nail polish selection?' to 'mephisto's stash' to 'does he even have painted nails? the man wears gloves but vibes say yes' to 'volume 19 cover confirms, man paints his nails'. At least no one can ever say I'm not dedicated to doing a bit. Anyway all I'm saying is exwires have sleepovers bc they're teenagers! let them have normal teenager things!
Mephisto absolutely wears nail polish and thoroughly enjoys manicures and pedicures.
And yes, the kids absolutely deserve to have sleepovers <3
— — — — —
They are black tonight, and Ryuuji can appreciate the edgy touch. Shiemi always paints him green with intricate flowers, Izumo has tried pink once (but only on his thumb so he let it pass) while Paku always tries to match his outfit.
He isn’t sure which of them has done this. He has been lost in his book and has long since given up trying to stop them. The girls will do what they want and arguing isn’t worth it.
Rin’s are blue tonight (they were out of his favorite red), and the light shade makes his eyes pop any time he moves to brush his bangs from his face. Shima’s are always some atrocious neon color (Izumo likes to make it clash with his hair, but they are still painted perfectly.
Konekomaru’s are alway soft browns or grays or earthy pinks. Nothing that stands out dramatically, though he does like when Shiemi adds mandalas to the design.
Yukio lets them do a clear coat, and that is usually it. They can occasionally add special ingredients to the polish, and Shiemi can occasionally coax him into clovers.
Takara’s hands are always hidden in his puppets, so Ryuuji doesn’t know what he gets on his nails.
The girls are never the same, and they are always fun to see. Flowers and kittens and foxes and mascots he doesn’t know, sweets and stripes and spells and countless little decorations that are always fun. He’s even seen summoning circles on Izumo’s nails.
The nail painting is only one of the things that happen on their hangouts.
Alright. They are technically sleepovers, but Ryuuji is always a bit squeamish about calling them that. It brings images of giggling (which yeah, they laugh but Ryuuji does not giggle), hair ribbons (he has let Shiemi and Rin braid his hair once and he did not allow the ribbons), gossiping (they trade intel, not gossip), and childish things. Plus people give them double looks when they hear that it is their entire group.
They’ve never done anything like that. They just fall asleep in the twins’ common room. They drag a bunch of blankets and old futons together and more or less collapse on the large nest of blankets and dolls. (He can never figure out who the stuffed animals belong to. And it grows every time he sees the pile. He’s even added two blankets and three stuffed coal-tars he’s won from Mephyland to the hoard.)
It’s fun and not weird, and calling them sleepovers makes them sound weird, so Ryuuji just calls them hangouts.
Anyway, it’s black tonight. Shiemi is adding a few final touches to her own toenails —it looks like she’s gone with a cherry blossom color scheme— and Rin is trying to throw popcorn into Shima’s mouth but he’s making a mess of it which means Kuro is pouncing around to get the missed pieces and both Konekomaru and Izumo are trying desperately to get the cat sidhe's attention.
Yukio is looking over the rules for the game they are going to be playing (even though he knows them by heart) while Sei fusses over the cards and boards. It’s the sort of thing that involves resource management, which means it’s going to be down to him, Yukio, and Shiemi who has unnaturally good luck at any game. (Maybe there is something to her clovers.)
Rin will be the first one out, which is just as well because he will go make snacks and then they'll all get to enjoy them, and Ryuuji is going to need extra fuel to beat everyone. (Shiemi has painted clovers on Yukio's thumbs. Hopefully there isn't anything to her clovers.)
Konekomaru catches Kuro and cuddles him close as Yukio motions everyone forward for the game. Izumo takes the spot by Konekomaru's side, trying to coax Kuro to her own lap with a bit of popcorn.
Ryuuji snags a stuffed dragon and flops over on his stomach next to Rin. (The dolls were nice to lay on and the spot ensures he'll have first pick of the snacks when Rin gets back.)
"Why can't we do spin the bottle?" Shima whines as he takes a seat next to Yukio.
"Because no one wants to kiss you." Izumo answers without missing a beat. Kuro is staring contemplatively at her popcorn.
"You're so mean to me!"
She's painted his nails a soft lavender that goes well with his hair. She must have felt generous, or the red being empty has really thrown her off. (Ryuuji is inclined to believe the first even if it would earn him a punch in the arm to say it.)
"We could play never have I ever after this?" Paku asks, trying to placate both her friends. "As a compromise."
Shima perks right up as Ryuuji takes his cards and helps walk Rin through what each one is (again.)
"That'll work."
"But," Paku adds, giving Shima an appraising look, "the group has the right to veto questions."
The idea is met with general approval despite Shima’s immediate whine of No fair! and But everyone will veto all my questions!
Izumo returns that he shouldn’t be a pervert then and Kuro grows big enough to drape himself over her lap and Konekomaru. His tails (deliberately) upset the popcorn bowl and the kernels go everywhere. Chaos reigns for a moment as everyone dodges they flying snack, and then it’s a scramble to make sure Kuro doesn’t eat it all. You’ll get fat! Rin warns, earning a hiss of insult.
They settle back down, Rin’s tail drapes over Ryuuji’s ankle and Yukio’s knee is a little uncomfortable where it digs into his side, but they’re together and having fun and sleepover or not, they’re one of Ryuuji’s favorite things now.
#ryuuji suguro#ryuji suguro#exwires#my tumblr fics#ao no exorcist#blue exorcist#ane#aoe#aoex#bon suguro#rin okumura#shima renzou#izumo kamiki#konekomaru miwa#shiemi moriyama#yukio okumura#kuro
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Theory: What Happened to Dess?
(major Deltarune spoilers)
I've seen a lot of speculation floating around about what happened to Noelle's sister Dess. I've seen these theories so far:
1. Noelle accidentally killed Dess with her ice powers. It traumatized her and that's why she choked during the spelling bee and stares into the freezer at the grocery store.
2. Asgore accidentally ran over Dess and this is why he doesn't use his car and why Undyne is so preoccupied with traffic.
3. Dess ran away to escape their overbearing mom, leaving Noelle in a worse situation. Asgore couldn't find her and that's why he was dismissed from the force.
I like bits and pieces of all these theories so I've combined parts of them into one theory I haven't seen yet: Dess's body is in the bunker in the woods.
Let me cover some ground info and evidence for my theory. I'll be going over some stuff that others have put together already (like Dess's full name) so I couldn't have come to this conclusion without the work of other theory crafters.
1. Dess's full name is December. We can assume this because the buttons spell out "December" when Noelle is talking about Dess for the first time. The room Queen puts Noelle in has clothes that don't look like they belong to Noelle and a calendar that only has the last month of the year, implying it's her sister's room and her name is December.
2. Noelle speaks about Dess in the past tense, as though she has died.
3. Noelle chokes during the spelling bee when asked to spell December, implying that when she was a kid, the thought of her sister was traumatic or upsetting enough to make her go quiet.
4. Noelle also stands and stares into the freezer at Sans's grocery store, as if frozen in place, similar to her reaction during the spelling bee. This implies that her trauma has something to do with the cold, doors, or both.
5. There is no grave for Dess in the town's graveyard. If she is dead, it's likely her body was not found. Given her family attends the church next to the graveyard, it's unlikely they would choose to cremate her or bury her elsewhere.
6. Catti in the cafe says that she, Noelle, and Kris were all interested in the occult when they were younger. The way she talks about it, it doesn't sound like casting magic spells, but more like practicing wicca or doing rituals. I don't think magic as it exists in the dark world is a thing in the real world, judging by how surprised Susie seems by all of it. So I don't think that Noelle can do ice magic in the real world, and her association with the cold and trauma comes from something else.
7. Noelle seems to black out when she does or sees something upsetting. She blacks out and doesn't remember what happened when you force her to "proceed" or "get" the ring.
8. When Noelle talks about the night that she, Dess, Kris, and Asriel went to the woods as kids, she says she doesn't remember how that night ended. She only remembers the beginning and feeling nostalgic.
9. If you take her to Spamton's area in the dump - a quiet, creepy, abandoned hole in the wall - she says it feels nostalgic somehow.
10. Post-game, you can see two of Kris's classmates at the bunker contemplating going inside, implying there's some sort of negative rumors about it and that Kris is "a weenie" who is scared of it.
11. The newspaper clipping in the police station says Asgore was dismissed from the force for unstated reasons. This implies he did something bad, but not bad enough to go to jail himself. If he killed Dess (even accidentally), I don't think Rudy would speak so fondly of him.
Given all this, here is my final conclusion on what happened to Dess:
Dess, Noelle, Kris, and Asriel were out in the woods together, having fun and exploring. They found the bunker at some point - a creepy, isolated door in the middle of the quiet woods, just like Spamton's area that Noelle also describes "nostalgic." Kris and Noelle were probably interested in it, because they both were into creepy, occult things. When they opened the door, trapped air in a bunker like that tends to be chilly and it rushed out when released, not unlike the freezer door that Noelle stares blankly into.
The kids went into the cold, abandoned bunker in the woods and something happened down there. Perhaps it was something occult, or just a traumatic accident. Noelle either witnessed what happened to Dess or found Dess's cold, frozen body after she died, but has blacked out the memory and now freezes up when reminded of it. Kris may not have seen everything, but knows enough to be scared of the bunker.
Asgore, a police officer at the time, was never able to find Dess. Maybe the kids sealed the bunker after they left and Asgore couldn't get in. Or perhaps something happened with all the kids down there that caused Dess to get hurt, and Asgore was worried his kids would get in trouble and kept it a secret to protect them. Since he never found Dess, Asgore was dismissed from the force by Noelle's mom, the mayor.
Since Dess's body was never found and buried, Dess's corpse could still be in the bunker during the events of Deltarune.
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I saw this post and I was wondering if you write Malleus' too, is okay for you to make that?
How to win a heart of Malleus Draconia?
a/n: I started posting my writings here because I want to improve my English — so I technically wouldn't make this request. But! Someone on Wattpad (where I take requests) asked for the same thing, so I rolled up my sleeves and wrote this guide today in both languages. Enjoy~
1. Don't be afraid of him.
It is said that the first impression is the most important.
So when you first saw this guy walking through the corridor of Diasomnia, it was hard for you to get rid of that view from your head.
Illuminated both by the green magic flames set in the lobby, as well as by the moon, which eventually managed to break through the dark clouds and with a bright glow appear in the windows of the dormitory, he seemed... lonely and beautiful.
You shuddered as you took a step down the hallway and the dark-haired man turned to you. He measured you with his emerald eyes. And then you recognized him; all the conversations about the mysterious and fearsome Malleus Draconia flew through your head.
Everything told you to rush towards the hallway and run as far as possible, but a piece of you found it inappropriate. Or rather, no one would want to chase everyone away from themself... right?
When you realized you were looking at him for a while, you took a deep breath and nod slightly.
"Good evening, Draconia-san," you said quickly. After a while you added, "The moon is beautiful today, don't you think?”
2. Smile a lot.
Today was a really wonderful day: the test was postponed, your favorite dish was given in the canteen, and for some reason, the last two lessons were canceled – your class had to make just a quick note about a topic and it took less than fifteen minutes.
"Something happened?" Malleus asked, seeing how almost in the jumps you walk past him. When you looked at him, he added, "You smile a lot.”
"I can stop smiling if you want," you made a sad face, but after a while, the corners of your mouth began to tremble uncontrollably and twisted up again. "Oops, I can’t. Today... it was such a good day... that I think I'm slowly using my life's happiness.”
"I didn't say that smiling is bad," he said. "You look so much better when you smile.”
"Oh," you sighed with apparent surprise. "Is it a compliment?"
"It’s rather a fact..?"
3. From time to time visit him during club activities.
"Is this a class of the ‘Gargoyle research society club’?” with a deaf knock you opened the door. Malleus turned to you, making a break from browsing through the materials gathered in the library about the history of each of the gargoyles on the school grounds. And there were a lot of them.
"Yes," he replied briefly, getting up. "Do you need something, [Name]?"
"Not at all, my club don’t have a meeting today," you said, closing the door behind you.
You looked around: the room was as clean as ever, except for one desk, where were laid several huge volumes about statues in NRC.
“Are you here alone?” You said before you thought. You lowered your eyes to see Malleus nodding unconcerned slightly. You blinked several times trying to think of what else you could say. "This room... could be a secret base," that was the first thing that came to your mind. Malleus turned his head to one side, uncertain of your response.
“A secret base..? Why?”
"I have no idea," you admitted quickly. "But the very existence of a mysterious point is interesting, isn't it? Doing normal things, such as watching movies or just talking, seems more interesting in places like this,” After a moment of silence, you sighed. "You know what, this idea with the base is stupid”
"We can try," he replied with serious tone. You raised your eyes to see how he looked around the room. "But you'll just have to explain this idea to me in more detail. We can also tell Lilia, Silver and Sebek about it...” he smiled as if seeing your five together in his thoughts was a pleasure. "It will be surely... fun.”
4. Get yourself a Tamagotchi.
"Look!" you spin a new key chain on your finger. You finally stopped and showed it to Malleus. "Now they are matching!”
A small electronic toy, in a dark green screen that, when it flashed, showed a virtual, pixelated animal. You were impressed with how good quality it was made, especially since you only gave the Shroud brothers a sketch of a toy that Malleus owned.
Your keychain was exactly the same, just a different color and with another pet.
Malleus pulled out his own device and put it on the table. He pressed one of the buttons and a small pet appeared on the keychain – a dragon.
"They can now be friends," you brought your toy closer to so-called Gao-Gao Dragon-kun.
"Do you think so?" He asked in a very surprised tone, but it sounded as if in a moment he were about to burst out with an inexplicably joyful and surprised laugh.
"Of course. Everyone needs a decent friend, no?”
5. Gain the trust of Lilia, Silver and Sebek.
Lilia, one of Malleus' closest people. It is much more likely that you will meet him before Malleus. He will be very proud when he learns that Malleus has found a friend. If you become a taster of Lilia, in terms of his pastries, he will 100% like you, and at 20% you will leave the kitchen alive and well.
Silver, who has mastered the art of sleeping in any conditions. It's easy to get him into your plans, although with the craziest ones he will hesitate. Rather well-disposed towards everyone, he can cover for you when you are not in class— but he usually inadvertently falls asleep and both of you often have penal assignments after school.
Sebek, faithful to Malleus, if he doesn't like you, you won't have too many opportunities to stay by Malleus's side without a thunderous glances at you. He will recognize you if you will listen carefully to his monologues about his master and as a sign of your friendship, he will teach you by heart of all the titles and achievements of Malleus so far.
With this trio by your side, you can get a lot further than you might have imagined...
6. Be a master in hide and seek.
You’d give your right arm that your breath was too loud.
You pressed your hands to your mouth as you crouched in the corner of the room.
From whose voices you already heard, you knew that Lilia had already found Sebek. This meant that you or Silver would still be helping cook dinner since Malleus didn’t come at the start of the game.
This may seem silly, but the ability to play classic games was one of the elements of the art of survival in Diasomnia.
It was thanks to games like ‘stone-paper-scissors’, hide and seek or tag that household chores fell on the shoulders of the losers. Lilia loved the idea, and there was always a proud smile on his lips when he saw his beloved children play together.
You heard the steps behind you and shivered.
Very slowly you turned around and looked up to see Malleus standing over you and wondering what you were doing, crouching in the darkest corner of the room.
Puns were also included in the survival pack.
Fearing that Lilia would hear your whisper, you put your finger on your mouth, asking him not to say a word. You put a begging eye into it – all but not cooking with Lilia. Not again.
Malleus nodded, recognizing the gravity of the situation, although he smiled.
Really, no one would want Malleus to be an enemy.
Or at least in such a situation.
7. Do not hesitate to ask him for help with learning.
"In theory, you should focus on the space around you," Malleus pulled a wand in front of him. It flashed, and almost at the same time, a thin but incredibly strong protective barrier was created around him. “Weaker spells can be reflected. In turn, the stronger ones are better to block”
You nodded understandingly.
Defensive magic was not something easy to understand. Most depended on the person against whom the counter spell was being prepared. And there are countless people who walk on this Earth and want to start fights.
"Unique spells block or avoid physically," he continued. You nodded at every subsequent sentence, slowly feeling like all the lessons are eventually gaining transparency. “Using unique magic against unique magic, the stronger will win, both will lead to explosions or completely reduce.
He looked at you when you wrote down the last sentence in your notebook.
"I sincerely hope that you will only need this information in class," he said with a sigh. "If you need help, call me. I will come. I promise.”
8. Sometimes be persuaded to wear extravagant clothes.
"Do you really think it suits me?" you turned around, looking at yourself from every possible angle in the mirror.
You were going to the theater in a few classes to see some era-related play that you've been discussing now in history lessons. Everyone, respecting the reputation, actions and achievements of theatre, dressed in their best clothes.
Malleus stood next to you.
He was already wearing a black and white outfit with green accessories. They all worked so well together and fitted him like a glove that you were sure that the whole outfit was made especially for him.
"Yes," he replied. "Everything you put on today suited you very well.”
Once again, with critical eyesight, you looked at the outfit, face and hair, before you quickly turned off the lights in the room and closed the door behind you.
Then you smiled at Malleus.
"We can go now," you said. You made your way through the portal to the main NRC building. "And... thank you for your help.
"My pleasure," he said. Under no circumstances was it just a polite formula. He really loved looking at you.
9. Invite him to your birthday/party.
"Another break from school soon, huh?" — you muttered, leaning against the railing.
You took a deep breath and let the fresh, pleasant air refresh you.
"Are you going to home, [Name]?" Malleus asked. Green lights were still flying around him, so you guessed he’d just appeared here.
"I haven't decided yet," you sighed. "It would be nice to go home, but the break won't be very long... Ah, that's right!” you straightened up and turned to him. "How about spending another break together? As soon as I can, I will contact my family... although I cannot promise anything.”
Though he did not show it, Malleus' heart beat a little faster.
Spend free time? With someone? With someone he likes?
"Of course," he sounded less calm than he thought. He wasn’t often invited anywhere, even for the things he should have been on, so there was a lot of excitement growing in his body. "I don't see anything against it.”
10. From "The Great Malleus Draconia-sama" to "Love".
"Ah, The Great Malleus-sama!" you sighed theatrically, taking from him a box of chocolates with a joyful smile. You could promise that because of this dark-haired boy here, you slowly become pampered. "Thank you for your generosity!”
Malleus frowned.
"The Great Malleus-sama"..?” he pondered, putting his fingers to his chin. "Did Sebek told you again to call me with this title?"
"No," you laughed softly at his reaction. "I did it out of curiosity. Maybe I could call you some cute nickname, hmm?" you smiled mischievously.
"For example?"
"By adding ‘-chan’ to your name?” you turned on your phone and typed something related to the nicknames. You started reading suggestions and struggled to hold back from laughing. ” ’Sunshine’, ‘star’, ‘flower’, ‘sweetheart’, ‘love’...
"I like the last one," he said, and the invisible force stung you to the ground.
"Would you like me to call you like that? Out of curiosity or out of love?" You laughed, but your cheeks were all red with blushes.
He smiled sincerely at your reaction.
"Hmm, I wonder..?"
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E129 (March 16, 2021)
Tonight’s guests are Matt Mercer and Taliesin Jaffe!
Matt, on DMing Luc’s Revivify: “That was weird. It’s one thing when it happens because of player action and circumstances and the choices they make. When it’s entirely on me, unintentional, and just realizing different chess pieces you’ve set up, that’s rough.” It was especially rough since this was a child NPC related to a PC. “I was hoping somebody had a spell slot left.” He kept in mind that there are two clerics in the room and that they could resurrect the next day even if the Revivify went poorly. “A good chance, since it’s his first time. Okay, okay, okay, okay, I think we’ll be okay, we’ll see how this goes. It was really stressful in the moment! I did not set out to have that happen, but when I realized what was going to happen, I tried to see it through.” He wouldn’t have prevented a chance to bring him back. “There may have been an offshoot short-run series of games to find a way to bring him back. I would have found some way to correct the circumstance so the players could feel good about moving forward with the story and there was no undue punishment beyond their control.”
Taliesin on Cad’s response: “This is a big thing if you’re a cleric. It was very much coming in like an EMT. Everything should be fine... hopefully. Just focused in and got it done. The minute things started to go south it was like, okay, that’s the next problem.”
On Yeza’s feelings: “It is a very complicated situation. I think he, much like how Veth is trying to figure out what it is that she wants, I think he’s trying to help her find that while also figuring it out for himself. I think Yeza’s also noticing that because Veth’s the more active of the two of them she also takes the weight of the responsibility and the blame for things when they go wrong, unnecessarily. Especially when he himself acknowledges that he’s partially at fault for even dragging everyone in with the Conclave. As much as he’s appreciative for them coming back for him, there’s a lot of back and forth. He’s filled with a lot of regret, too, but he’s very much trying to convince Veth that it’s a burden that she doesn’t have to keep to herself, that they can share it and work through it together.” Matt mentions that, as an actor, he really loves exploring interactions between characters first and foremost. “Especially when you don’t know where it’s going to go.” He also praises Sam as a scene partner - “I really cherish that.”
How does Caduceus feel about Revivify and Speak with Dead? “Speak with Dead is an interesting middle ground, because he knows that it’s not actually speaking with the dead. It’s really just-- it’s almost medical, really. This is just reactivating a brain at a certain point. It’s practically just a muscle twitch at this point. That doesn’t really prod him in that direction. Revivify is interesting, because it had never really come up. At first I thought of it as bending the rules, but it’s not bending the rules. You knock over a plant, you replant it, you don’t stare at it and go ‘Well, that’s over.’ This is just doing the work. No, we can bring this thing back to health. This is all part of the circle of life, that sometimes we can save something. Especially given the stress that he’s put himself through over the past year of being with these people. He’s started to think of himself a bit as a battlefield medic, and triage is just part of the deal, and it’s completely acceptable.”
Did Trent really just want to talk? “Yeah, that circumstance, as it came together, Trent would never have arrived if there wasn’t an indication that there was some kind of infiltration or attack. Even beyond that, it was Jester breaking the concentration on her charm on that one guard when she created her duplicate.” The guards’ job is to inform a member of the Cerberus Assembly, and Trent lived the closest. “He didn’t know who it was, didn’t have any expectation necessarily. The minute he saw the illusion, he knew a powerful magic user was involved.” Seeing Caleb was an unexpected surprise. “I don’t think he wanted to throw down necessarily. He was more interested in figuring out exactly what the nature of this was.” Matt had multiple battlemaps that didn’t get used. “They managed to cleverly out-maneuver him in his surprise of seeing them.” The Nein rocketed up his priority list after that very quickly. Taliesin: “We’re so fucked.”
On Cad being “Uncle Caduceus” to Luc: “It’s the thing he misses most about home, is being a juvenile shit. It’s nice to be able to express that part of him again, as opposed to the serious, life-threatening, constant intensity. I’m very at home just being a little difficult.”
Cosplay of the Week: an amazing Beau! (_rumor_king, photography by kourtyardproductions on Instagram)
On Marion: “Like a lot of people in this whole narrative from the beginning, getting swept up in things larger than her and trying to adapt. This is a circumstance she’s avoided for a long time. She’s having a rough time in some ways, but simultaneously, she’s enduring. Like a mother would. She’s adapting, she’s making it work. Without much of a choice, you just kind of do the best you can and lean on the people around you to help you where they can. Luckily she has a daughter there. She’s probably surprising herself at how well she’s doing given the circumstances.” Matt talks about how weird it is to feel proud of character he’s created. “Of the many things Marion is incredible at, she’s a studier of the human condition. She’s seen and heard the stories of so many. That gives her a very special perspective. She can see elements of that fractured individual within Caleb, and knowing the good that he’s brought to his friends, and knowing he’s possibly saved her life from bad circumstances, she couldn’t not speak up. She very easily falls into that role of maternal comforter, because it’s one of the many things she’s really good at, she enjoys it, and she can see well when people need it.” He’s been enjoying having Marion along for this (despite the difficult circumstances) because he was always a little sad that they only got to see her for short periods of time.
On the Blooming Grove’s safety: “He’s afraid that it’s a premonition. He’s not pinned it down, but he’s happy to let his imagination wander. He at the very least feels like there’s a reason he’s having these thoughts, and that there’s a reason to go there. He’s a big believer that these things don’t just happen. He’s more likely to think that there’s a good reason to go versus a danger to go. He’s had a couple of ominous warnings lately, and he’s not used to them and not a fan. He’s more likely to read something like that as, there is something there waiting for you that you have to discover. There is something that is going to be helpful to you, even if it hurts.”
On Astrid: “While maybe not as readable in overall personality as Trent is, I still want to be careful to not discuss things that are still being discussed within the game and tossed around as possibilities. Astrid is another complicated character, as anyone would be who’s been through the life she has. I can’t say too much. I can say she’s definitely legitimately happy to see Bren/Caleb after all this time.” His reemergence definitely caught her off guard. “We’ll have to see where it goes from there.”
On Cad’s successful Divine Intervention: “He’s definitely hit the ‘on a mission from god’ stage. He’s been that way for the entire campaign of, this, this is what I’ve been waiting for. Even when it sucks a lot, it’s been nice that those things have popped up to remind him, no, no, you’re doing it right, everything’s good. Probably not going to survive the next week, but you’re doing good! Not quite 1 in a 100 chance, but I forget so often to make that roll, and it’s such a great roleplaying roll. I don’t know how at level 20 you could deal with the fact that you can do that every day.”
On Zeenoth getting his comeuppance: the kidnapping was a concept Marisha brought up for Beau’s backstory, and Matt went with it even though it was opposed to the Cobalt Soul’s philosophy because he knew rooting it out would make for an interesting story. “I felt it was an important beat to bring to her, because it was something that she was wronged by. And to show that there are still some good people out there who are trying to make things right.” After the tentative peace, dealing with this became Dairon’s next focus. “I was glad we finally got to it. So many people don’t have the opportunity in their lives to get that sort of justice and vindication, so if I can bring elements of that justice into our world, even for our own hope, I’m going to do that. Especially for my wife’s character, especially for a character that deserves that.” Taliesin points out that if it had come too early, Beau wouldn’t have believed it.
Cad’s thoughts on the Tomb Taker betrayal? “He knew it was gonna come at some point. There was no way that was gonna last. He was hoping it was gonna last a little longer. He was really hoping they had a vested interest in getting them all the way to the end. Nope, this is apparently as far as we go, and he was not prepared for that.” He was expecting the potential for de-escalation. “Caduceus is the only character in there that doesn’t have a history with Lucien. I think he sees him a little more clearly than everybody else does. They’re all looking for this person that Clay, at least, is of the opinion that he’s just not there. This is a very manipulative, very dangerous infernal human. Just smarter than all of them. Really aware that there is no calculating what the hell is going to happen. Conversation is the only way you can deal with someone like that.”
Fan Art of the Week: An amazing Caleb closeup! (rynn_birb on Twitter)
Taliesin on Lucien: “I’m excited he’s the one that’s going to kill us all. Poetic that this is how the game ends.” Matt was delighted when Taliesin handed him carte blanche to do what he wanted with Molly’s past. “I was like ‘shit... oh, wait!’ The character of Lucien was always intended to be an antagonist so that it would have been Molly being chased by the person who wanted their body back. But then it happened that he got his body back.” Taliesin: “He’s so much worse than I ever hoped.”
Matt, on the Holy Avenger: “I hadn’t thought to initially even give that sword.” The good roll was the only reason Kima handed that over. “Well, sure, you get the sword. It was very reactionary, it wasn’t my intent originally. I was like, well, I mean, there’s two avenues she can take with this.” Multiclass into Paladin, or lean into the fact that her subclass is essentially a barbarian paladin. “This really works out in a uniquely beautiful way. Let me see if I can lay out a path for her to earn it.”
On Cad’s attempt at lying blowing up in his face: “He was like that kid that had a really bad day in high school and was like, you know what? I’m going to let loose. This is it. I’m gonna dye a streak in my hair. And then tries to give himself a haircut and ends up with half bangs. Well, okay, obviously I’m not that person. I was feeling a little distraught and I didn’t handle it well. Maybe I’m going dark... no, I’m not going dark. Nope.” Matt mentions how much he relates to Caduceus.
Matt, on the Eyes: “What can I tell you? I’m enjoying the hell out of it. The moment they began to really push to read that book, I was like, okay, this is on you. I’m excited for the point in the narrative where the march continues back to Eiselcross. I am almost impatient - not really - because we’re on the cusp of getting to more of the meat. There’s so much to learn, so much to see, so much to explore. I love instilling my players with absolute terror.”
Thoughts on Jester’s Tarot reading? Taliesin cackles. “Molly made the cards, so. Did it to himself, he did, he did.” Matt: “Once again, another example of things working out unexpectedly and too perfectly for an improvised moment. Fuck.” Taliesin: “Bless the wisdom of chaos.” Matt: “I love that even at this point in the campaign, Molly continues to fuck with people. I’m just so proud. That deeply shook Lucien, for reasons.” Taliesin: “It’s the everlasting gobstopper smoke bomb.”
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Underneath the goody-two-shoes persona is damaged goods…but can the bad boy across the street save her?
Damaged Goods, an all-new angsty, enemies to lovers, sports romance from USA Today bestselling author L.J. Shen is now available!
Bailey Followhill is the perfect daughter.
Sweet. Charitable. Pretty. Control freak.
Not a hair out of place, not an inch out of line, she is everything her troublemaking sister Daria isn't.
But when her A game turns out to be a lukewarm C- at Juilliard, Bailey's picture-ready life starts fraying faster than the worn satin ribbons of her pointe shoes.
She's becoming a piece of gossip.
The Troubled Child. A drug abuser.
No longer the girl her best friend once knew.
Lev Cole is so golden, he's got the Midas Touch.
Prized quarterback. Football captain. Hottest guy in SoCal. A textbook cliché.
But with a girlfriend he doesn't love and a career path he doesn't value, Lev is coasting.
The only two things he cares about―Bailey and becoming a pilot―are out of reach.
But Lev is done being satisfied with the life others have chosen for him. He wants to pick his own cards. To demolish the seamless kingdom of lies his family stitched together on the ruins his mother left behind.
The question is, can he save his best friend and his dream before too much damage is done?
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PROLOGUE
Lev
Age fourteen
I’m standing over my mother’s grave, wondering why the fuck my eyes are dry.
I couldn’t look at the coffin back inside the church. Knight said she looked pretty. Calm. At peace. But also…nothing like herself.
I squeezed my eyes shut the entire way through, the way I did when I was really little and went on spooky rides at theme parks. Now I’m freaking out because maybe I made a mistake, because it was the last time I could look at her face not through a picture.
That’s the thing about losing someone—there are so many losses along the way that make up a big loss.
No more cuddles in bed on rainy days.
No more heart-shaped fruit in my lunch box.
No more singing lullabies to me when I’m sick, with me pretending I’m embarrassed and annoyed by it when actually Mom singing lullabies is the best thing to happen to this universe since sliced bread.
Bailey is hugging me so close, my bones are about to dissipate to dust. She’s about four inches taller than me now, which is stupid and embarrassing and just my luck. My face is hidden deep inside her hair, and I pretend to cry because it seems rude and screwed up if I don’t. But the truth is, I’m not sad or gloomy or any of those things. I’m fucking pissed. Angry. Enraged.
Mom’s gone.
What if she’s cold? What if she’s claustrophobic? What if she is struggling to breathe? What if she’s scared? Reasonably, I know she isn’t. She’s dead. But logic isn’t my friend right now. Not even an acquaintance. Hell, I doubt I could spell the word in my current state. I feel like Bailey is physically keeping me together. Like if she loosens her arms around me, I’ll collapse into thousands of little marbles, scatter and disappear into the nooks and crannies of the cemetery.
Everyone files back to their cars. Dad claps a shaking hand over my shoulder and steers me away from the grave. Bails reluctantly releases me. I clutch the tips of her fingers. She’s gravity. She’s oxygen. In this moment in time, she’s everything.
Sensing my unspoken need for her, Bailey turns to my dad. “May I please catch a ride with you, Uncle Dean?”
Thank you, Jesus.
“Yeah, Bails, sure,” Dad says distractedly, laser-focused on Knight’s back. My brother is going through his own stuff right now and my dad is trying to ensure he doesn’t lose another member of our family. Usually, I’m cool with being the low-maintenance, “background” kid. Not today, though. I just lost my mom at fourteen. I want the world to stop, but it disrespectfully keeps on spinning and functioning like my life wasn’t just destroyed.
Before we hop into the car, I clutch Bailey’s fingers and pull her to me. “If I told you I want to run away from here, somewhere really far, like…I dunno, Kansas far, what would you say?”
Her big blue eyes hold mine like my eyeballs are about to fall off. “We ride at dawn, bitch.”
“Really?” I ask.
She nods once. “Try me, Lev. You’re my best friend. I’ll never let you down.”
It’s weird, but the possibility of Bailey and me running away from all this is the one thing holding my ass together right now. She might be everyone’s good girl, but to me, she’s a bad addiction.
The drive is silent. I’m a page torn out of a book. Out of place and floating aimlessly. All I have is the memory of once belonging. Then, we’re in front of my house. Everyone trickles inside in their black frocks. They look like ghouls. Home without Mom isn’t a home. It’s a pile of bricks and expensive furniture.
Invisible ivy roots me to the ground. Bailey is the only one who notices. She loiters behind with me, and suddenly, I really hate that I’m putting all my dreams and hopes on her. Because she could be gone tomorrow too. Bus accident. Freak heart attack at fifteen. A kidnap-and-murder plot. The options are endless, and I have really shitty luck with people.
“Kansas?” She grabs my fingers, playing them like they’re keys on a piano.
I shake my head, too choked up to produce actual words.
“We don’t have to go inside.” Her hands slide up to grab my arms and keep me standing. How did she know I’m close to falling? “We can hang out at mine. I’ll make fondue. We can watch South Park.” Her blues gleam like sapphires.
Fresh irritation floods me. Bailey is being soooo understanding, even though she doesn’t understand jack shit. She does have a mom. A healthy one. And a dad. And a sister who isn’t an addict. Her life is perfect, while mine is a pile of calamities.
She’s a blossoming flower, and I’m dirt, but that’s okay because the thing about flowers is they’re buried in dirt, so I know exactly how to cut her off.
Shaking her off, I swivel and stomp my way out of our cul-de-sac. She races after me, calling my name. Her Mary Janes clap the ground urgently.
“Lev, please! Did I say something wrong?”
To be fair to her, she stood no chance at saying anything right. But screw being fair. I’m hurting, and she is baggage. Just another person to love and to lose.
I pick up my pace, running now. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m eager to get there. The sky—completely blue just seconds ago—cracks like an egg. Thunder rolls, gray washes over it, and rain starts pouring in thick sheets. It’s summer in SoCal and shouldn’t rain. The universe is angry, but I’m angrier.
Whenever Bailey manages to catch the sleeve of my shirt, I speed up, but even after thirty minutes of running in the rain, soaked to the bone, she doesn’t quit. Somehow, we find ourselves in the woods on the outskirts of town. The thick, tall branches and blankets of leaves intertwine together like laced fingers above us, creating a makeshift umbrella. I can sort of see my surroundings now, and it’s pretty and it’s calm and far enough away from that stupid cemetery. I stop running when I realize I’m not gonna escape the new reality: Mom’s dead.
I finally understand the term heartbreak. Because that thing in my chest? Split open clean in two.
I turn around, my lungs scorching. Bailey is pale and sodden, her black dress clinging to her body. Her lips are blue and her skin is so pale, I see a map of purple and red veins under her flesh.
“Go home,” I growl. But I don’t want her to go home. I want her to never leave.
She steps closer, tilting her chin up defiantly. “I’m not leaving you.”
“Fuck off, Bailey!” I fold in half, screaming. I feel like she kicked me in the stomach.
She’ll leave. She’ll let you down. Don’t fall for this, Lev.
“I’m so sorry.” Her eyes are full of tears, and she flexes her fingers, itching to grab me.
Hug me.
Go away.
Fuckfuckfuck.
My mouth opens again and more bullshit spews out. “Don’t be sorry for me. Be sorry for yourself. You’re the loser who hangs out with an eighth grader instead of people your own age.”
“I wish it didn’t happen.” She ignores my insults, trying to grab my fingers again and play them like a piano, like she does every time I’m upset.
Laughing, I rasp, “I wish you didn’t happen.”
“I wish it were me who was dead.” Her face is covered with tears and pain and mud, and I can’t do this anymore. I don’t care how much I’m hurting, I can’t ruin the only good thing about my life right now. She gives me something to fight for when every cell of my body wants to give up.
“Now you’re just talking outta your ass.” I spit phlegm between us.
She shakes her head, quivering fingers darting to her hair, massaging her scalp. I believe her. And it kills me that even though I feel like someone slashed me open and my guts are pouring out, I still wouldn’t want Bailey to be in Mom’s place.
“I’m not. I’m serious. I would die before willingly watch you suffer.”
There’s a beat of silence. Then I open my mouth and the most feral, scary, loud cry I’ve ever heard tears out of it. It echoes in the sky and bounces off the trees. A flock of ravens takes flight from the treetops.
And then I go to the only place I need to be right now—I go mad.
For more information about L.J. Shen and her books, visit her website:
https://www.authorljshen.com
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