#the boy needs it so bad pls bring back frank

[roystartt]

Idk what you guys are talking about 'ship buddie' this or 'ship bucktommy' that

The only ship I care about is Eddie Diaz and Therapy.

[dovveri]

you can kiss a hundred boys in bars

synopsis: good luck, babe! - inspired fic (essentially sana left 6 years ago and you still can't stop thinking about her even though you're married to another man)

warnings: cheating, internalised homophobia, not chronological, implied sex, cursing

w/c: 6.4k

a/n: hi 😀 this one may not hit as many of the audiences but it was interesting to write. i zon't think i like it toooo much for how much time i spent on it (edit: the moots have made my day i do like this one a lot actually) but just one of those things i needed to get out before i was able to move on to the next thing :P weeeEEEEHHEEEE i love angst!!!!!!!

ok this one's going to be a bit different guys pls READ THIS or you'll be like what the fuck. purple text is the present. ty enjoy, that was it LOL.

▂▂⌇

you wake up with a migraine. it came not long after you married frank and it’s stayed ever since. you sit up on the bed, careful not to make too much movement or sound to wake your husband next to you. although that was pretty unlikely anyway considering how he slept.

you sigh lightly, holding your head in your hands trying to mitigate the damage.

your head starts drifting off, as it did on most nights these days. it seemed the only thing that ever worked to stop the pounding in your head was thinking about her.

▂▂⌇

funnily enough, sana was actually the reason you and frank had met.

it had happened when the both of you were at a bar after class celebrating the end of exams. sana being sana had made a whole group of friends 10 minutes upon entering the establishment. you were sitting back watching her challenge someone to down the most shots in one minute. you would have stopped her on another day but after the hell week she's been through with her finals, you figured she deserved it. and you'd be there to take her home afterwards anyway.

she's whooping and jumping around, turning back to you with a grin when she wins. the poor loser skulking away back to his friends.

frank goes up to her then. introducing himself with that kind voice of his, just making sure she had someone to go home with and look after her.

and sana adored the attention. she's flirting with that charm of hers that no one could resist. but strangely enough, frank resisted. he was a gentleman, not wanting to pursue anything while sana was intoxicated, instead, he asked who could look after her, and sana points to you.

▂▂⌇

you're not getting back to sleep. instead you silently step out of bed, grabbing your phone and the hidden pack of cigarettes you kept in the second drawer of your bedside cupboard.

you step outside onto the balcony, breathing in the cool night air, shivering a little as you wrap the blanket you left on the balcony chair around you.

you click the lighter on, the small flame illuminating the darkness of the night, the only other light source aside from the moon. you're thinking if sana's somewhere she can see the moon right now while you put the lighter to the end of your cigarette. is it night for her? was she asleep? did she ever think about you?

you bring the stick to your mouth, inhaling, feeling the roughness of the nicotine hit your lungs, and exhaling softly, watching the wisps of smoke dissolve into the night sky.

sana hated when you smoked. frank didn't like it too much either, but he was never able to stop you.

▂▂⌇

"do you have to do that here?" sana's frowning when you release a puff of smoke into the air.

"sorry. stressed." you mumble in response, cig still stuck between your lips.

"you know i can help with that. just not when you taste like an ashtray." sana's still staring at the cancer stick you're sucking on with contempt, she never hated anything but if you had to place your money on something it'd be your bad habit.

you're smiling sheepishly, taking the cigarette out of your mouth and smooshing the end until it's not burning anymore.

the frown on her face is gone immediately, she's charmed you listen to her so easily. and she sticks to her word, stepping closer and leaning in.

your lips meet lazily, she's got a hand on your cheek, the other at your waist. you're wrapping your arms around her hips, holding her against you as your lips slot against each other.

sana was an attractive woman. there was no doubt about that. the two of you had met during high school. she had caught you sneaking off for a smoke during P.E. and had somehow convinced you to go and get your nails done with her instead. ever since then you two had been inseperable.

it was after you broke up with your first boyfriend in college that you started sleeping together. you remember he had decided to call it off because he was going all mormon and was ashamed of having had sex already, calling you a 'sex-addicted whore who was sent by the devil to tempt him into the flames of hell'. sana despised that he made you feel unwanted, and even more that he blamed you for the break up. she needed you to know just how valued you were, just how wanted you were, and in her drunk dazed mind that meant worshipping you until you came crying under her. and in your drunk dazed, heartbroken, self-pitying mind, you let her.

when it happened again, and again, and again, and then not under any alcoholic influence, the both of you decided to continue seeking each other out for sexual relief whenever you were stressed, or in any sort of mood that called for sex. you stopped every time one of you started a new relationship, but you always found your way back into each other's arms eventually.

▂▂⌇

you curse lightly when you reach the end of your cigarette.

picking out another one, you’re repeating your actions, lighting it up, bringing it between your lips, inhaling, feeling it fill your lungs, and then pushing it back out.

there hasn’t been a single day that’s gone by where you hadn’t thought about sana. frank didn’t get it at first. he asked you why you couldn’t just call her, you two were the best of friends, surely it wouldn’t be that difficult to reconnect?

he didn’t know you slept with sana on the night of you and frank’s wedding. doesn’t know the countless times you’ve slept with her before that. doesn’t know sana woke up earlier than you the next day, disappearing into the early morning, no note, no text, nothing. you were too ashamed to try and contact her for weeks after that, it wasn’t until you came back from your honeymoon that you realised you were knocking on an empty door when you tried to find her at her apartment. it was cleaned out, no furniture, no remnants of her, nothing to prove she even existed. you had called her over and over, tears of desperation spilling over, holding back choked sobs that only grew stronger with each voicemail message.

it wasn't until sana's old landlord holding a 'for lease' sign in his hand comes and kicks you out that you finally realise you'd lost her.

after that, your relationship with frank started to deteriorate. what did you expect though? was it sana's fault? if sana hadn't left would you have lived happily ever after, the three of you together?

it took a long time to realise the answer to that was no. you spent years blaming sana for leaving, and when you finally came to the terms that you were the one who drove her away, it was too much to bear.

▂▂⌇

"y/n!"

you smile at the sound of sana calling you in the corridor, turning to meet her hug as she crashes into you.

she starts talking your ear off and you nod along enthusiastically, but suddenly she stops, looks down to your hand, intertwined with someone else's.

"oh. who's this y/n?"

you look over at your newest boyfriend in surprise, almost forgetting he was holding your hand and standing next to you. you tended to forget a lot of things when sana was around.

"oh this is danny. we met at that bar i told you about last week remember?"

"hmm..." she's looking up at him in scrutiny, eyes squinted and eyebrows furrowed. you can feel danny's palms start to sweat under her gaze.

"one week huh? not bad, let's see how long you last, if you go longer than a month then i'll introduce myself to you." sana says then.

"sana!" you're hitting her lightly, flabbergasted at her insinuation.

"what? your last one was like 3 days. you just keep breaking these guys' hearts y/n." she places a hand over her heart dramatically.

danny's tightening his grip around your hand, speaking up, "excuse me, i don’t appreciate you wishing doom on our relationship even before its started. and i wouldn’t want to be introduced to a slut who’s never had a real relationship before anyway.”

sana’s speechless for a second but her face morphs into a scowl quickly after, “okay danny,” spitting out his name, “first rule of being a decent boyfriend? don’t talk shit about your girlfriend’s best friends. let’s see you last another hour after that comment.” she turns to you, raising an eyebrow, “you gonna let him off with that y/n?”

you’re stuck, and danny’s looking at you expectantly.

“sana… that comment was a little uncalled for y’know… you did kinda start this…”

danny’s smirking, looking smugly back towards sana.

“what?! are you serious right now y/n? y’know what? i don’t care. your life and whatever. see you later.” she’s stomping off, your heart sinking as you watch her.

“c’mon babe, forget her. let’s go get sushi.” danny doesn’t wait for a response before he’s pulling you in the other direction.

▂▂⌇

when you wake up again the next day, frank’s gone.

you stumble to your feet, clumsily making your way to the bathroom.

it’s almost late afternoon already. you’re lucky you didn’t have work today.

sana always used to scold you if you woke up past noon. she said you'd waste the whole day sleeping when you could have been spending it with her.

these days the second option wasn't exactly viable.

you cringe a little when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror. unkempt hair, dark circles under your eyes, visible signs of ageing. you'd bet sana still looked as radiant as she was all those years ago.

your phone starts buzzing when you turn on your electric toothbrush. it couldn't be anyone else other than frank. you didn't really talk to anyone else anyway. after sana left, you became a social recluse, and a lot of your friends were technically sana's friends so without that mutual connection anymore, you drifted from them very quickly.

“hello?”

“hey y/n, is my white button-up back from the dry cleaners yet? i need it tonight for this work event.”

“… no you didn’t tell me to pick anything up.”

“what? i left a note for you on the fridge did you not see it?”

“i just woke up frank.”

“it’s 2pm.”

“yeah.”

you can hear him sigh over the phone, “alright it’s fine i’ll pick it up after work.” he hangs up abruptly after he says that.

no goodbye, no i love you, he doesn’t call you by any pet names anymore either, just y/n. well it’s not like you did any of those things for him so you suppose it’s fair. he did do a lot of those things when you were dating and early in your marriage but eventually, when you stopped responding and got more and more tired of being with him, he stopped trying as well. you can’t even remember the last time you were intimate together.

frank had suggested the both of you try out marriage counselling but you were strongly against the idea. you didn’t feel particularly excited about disclosing everything that went on with sana with frank let alone with a complete stranger. you remember that week you fought about it and you ran away and didn’t come back until a month later. frank only tried to call you once during that time.

▂▂⌇

you were standing in front of an apartment door in japan.

you weren’t really thinking when you stood at the front desk of the airport, demanding a ticket for the next flight to osaka with only a small backpack and some essentials you were able to grab after your fight with frank.

it wasn’t until you were physically in the plane that you realised you didn’t actually know anyone but sana there. and you had made that unconscious decision because being with frank was simply too… nothing, and being with sana was… everything. it had been over 6 years since you had seen her last, when she left you that quiet night in may.

though it seems fate was on your side this time. sana’s cousin just happened to be working at the airport the night you arrived, when she recognised you, she was waving excitedly, ushering you over.

“y/n right? oh my goodness i haven’t seen you in so long! not since that time sana brought you here 7 years ago right?” her accent is a little thick but you’re grateful she can speak korean regardless, you could only understand very basic japanese picked up from sana.

you’re nervously rubbing the back of your neck, “ahaha yeah… do you actually happen to have sana’s address?”

she frowns a little, “she didn’t give it to you when she found out you were coming?”

it seems like sana hasn’t told many people about your relationship with her either.

“u-um ahaha no she must have forgotten. you know how she gets… too excited she forgets the important little details.”

the cousin laughs a little in response, agreeing and quickly typing in sana’s address on your phone. internally you’re thanking all the gods and deities you know of for this stroke of luck or you’d really be stranded in osaka with no knowledge of the language and nowhere to stay.

“i have to get back to work but say hi to sana for me! we haven’t seen her much since she came back a few years ago, she’s been really busy with work i think.”

you nod, heart pounding at the tidbits of information you’re getting about sana. anything to fill in the 6 year gap you’ve been apart.

you wave goodbye, thanking her again and then you’re hailing down a taxi and showing the driver the destination on your phone.

so now you’re standing in front of her apartment door, hands sweaty and nervous, just praying she wouldn’t kick you out or worse.

you’ve been standing here stupidly, deliberating when, how, if you should even knock. when there’s a slight commotion to your left, the sound of a bag of groceries dropping and a light gasp.

“y/n?”

it’s very cinematic when you turn, sana coming into view for the first time in so long is like finding water in a desert. you’re drinking her in hungrily, her darker hair, smile lines, perfect nose, she looks just as beautiful as you remember.

“sana…” you’re voice is hoarse with emotion.

she’s taking slow steps towards you after picking up her groceries. one… two…

“what are you doing here?”

“i-i- u-um i-“

“how did you get my address?”

“u-um i saw y-your cousin at the airport and she recognised me and i- i may have asked her for your address... i'm sorry! i would have called or like let you know but... y'know... i-i couldn't really do that..."

she considers you for a little bit, looking you up and down, her face stoic.

"...did you come here for something then?"

"i- um- well not really it was k-kinda an impulse decision. u-um frank and i fought and i just- i don't know i went to the airport and i found myself here i guess..."

you notice how her hand tightens at the mention of frank's name, the slight sound of the crinkling of her grocery bag.

"and what did you want me to do about that?" she's pushing past you now, taking out her keys and starting to unlock her door. you begin to panic, scrambling for words.

"i- sana please! i- i'm sorry! i'm sorry okay?"

the jingling of her keys stops, but she doesn't look back at you.

"what are you sorry for? i'm the one who left remember?" her voice is bitter and a little shaky, you realise she's not facing you because she's trying not to cry. you ache to hold her.

"i… i’m the reason you left though. right? it took me a long time to realise but i’m sorry i wasn’t able to be true to myself and i’m sorry you were a casualty to that. i missed you sana…." your voice is quiet, you feel your own tears welling up in your eyes.

“… what weren’t you true to yourself about?”

you take a big inhale, breath shaky when you let it back out. “that i love you.” your voice is tiny, you just confessed your love for the woman you’ve spent most of your life with, the woman that’s occupied your mind every second of every minute since she’s entered your life. the woman you were too scared to admit you loved, who waited for you to do exactly that only for you to enter a loveless marriage with someone else. you can only imagine the pain you’ve put her through. it would be nothing compared to the last 6 years without her. and the last 6 years without sana were undoubtedly the worst of your life.

sana’s sniffling now, unable to hold back her cries.

you inch forward and tentatively place a hand on her shoulder. when she doesn’t move it, you shift closer again to wrap your arms around her loosely.

suddenly sana’s turning and burrowing her face in your neck, you feel her wet tears stain your skin, but also your own start to run down your face. you're surrounded with sana sana sana, her smell, her sounds, the feel of her against you when you tighten your arms around her. you missed this so fucking much. you missed her. and for the first time in 6 years, you finally felt like you were home again.

▂▂⌇

after you've finished your morning routine, you lazily trudge into the kitchen, discarding the small note frank had told you about, and pouring yourself a bowl of cereal.

you sigh into the empty house. frank wanted kids of course, that's why you bought such a large house in the first place. he had dreamt of the whole white-picket fence family and you were excited to share that with him and sana. she had helped you design the place, decorate it when you first moved in, she was meant to move across the street and you were going to grow old together and watch as your kids played around and became the best of friends, just like the two of you were.

now though? you hated this house. it just felt so much more empty. you and frank had tried for kids, although that only really drove you further apart. sex just became more of a chore than something you enjoyed, and when people know you're trying to get pregnant? suddenly everyone has their 2 cents on what you should eat, what types of exercise you should do, the latest superfood that was meant to make you more fertile. everyone seemed to have more control over your own relationship, over your own body than you did.

eventually, the small amounts of love you and frank had for each other, fizzled out. and you decided you didn't want to raise a child in a loveless marriage, that wouldn't be fair to them. frank, even with his endless optimism and kind soul, agreed.

▂▂⌇

that night in japan, for the first time in six years since you saw sana, you were able to kiss her again, to feel her bare skin against yours, to taste her as she writhed and cried out your name above you.

you woke up before her the next day, sun sluggishly making its way past the horizon. you watched as her breaths came in and out, soft, her expression at peace, not clouded with anger or sadness at you. you traced the lines of her face, recollecting every single hair, every mole, every perfection and imperfection on her, so she'd always be with you in your memory.

she stirred after a while, blinking softly and you wait for her to come to, fingers tracing soft lines over her side.

you feel her freeze under you, breathing picking up, just barely noticeable but you were sharing the same airspace. her eyes meet yours for the first time that morning and you're committing the brown irises to memory now as well.

"you didn't leave." her voice is laced with morning fatigue.

you only hum in response, continuing to trace random shapes into her skin.

"why?"

you take a moment to think about your answer. years ago, you would've been terrified with the idea that someone would've found out about the two of you. that someone would know your dirty little secret. and that secret was that you were in love with your best friend. it was different for sana. sana was flamboyant, and proud, and happy. it wouldn't matter who sana liked because that didn't take away from her personality. she was still valuable as a person. you weren't like that though. you were always just sana's best friend or danny's girlfriend or frank's girlfriend or whoever else you dated at the time. the moment you deviated from that, a new label would be stuck on you, and people would pity sana, talk about how she could do so much better, how you were a witch who lured sana in. so you were selfish. you took from sana, and you never gave back. because sana was perfect in your mind, and she didn't need anything else.

"i'm sorry. there's a lot to be sorry for and a lot i need to make up to you. but at the core of it all, i love you sana. these six years without you have been hell. and i'm sorry it took that long for me to realise this, but i love you, not frank, not anyone else, just you."

you feel your eyes begin to tear up, heavy with emotions, sana's mirroring you, her bottom lip slightly quivering.

"what happened with frank?" her voice is a little shaky.

"we fought. i didn't want to deal with him anymore, my feet took me to the airport, and i ended up here."

sana sighs then, turning away from you and lying on her back. "so you're still together?"

"well... i- no but-"

"how is this time any different then y/n?"

"i- i- it's over, me and him. seeing you again has affirmed that for me. there hasn't been love between frank and i for a long time. i never loved him the way i love you. i'm ending things as soon as i get back. i promise sana. please- please believe me." you're scrambling a little, you couldn't afford to lose sana again. not after you had just gotten her back.

you can see tears running down the side of her face. you hate yourself for making her cry. that seems to be all you ever made her do.

"okay."

"okay?"

she turns to you again, wiping at her eyes, "okay. i really shouldn't but i love you too much and i've missed you too much to say no."

"really?" your perking up, disbelief clear.

"you keep asking me that and i'll change my mind." she teases, smiling for the first time.

you're overjoyed. rolling onto her and sweeping her up in a kiss, hoping your actions convey your feelings for her better than your words do. she's laughing into you and god have you missed that sound. you attack her sides immediately, almost desperate to hear it again, to make her feel something other than the sadness you've caused her. you make a promise to yourself in that moment, that you'd never, never make sana cry again.

it took you only a month to break that promise.

▂▂⌇

"hi, frank's wife right?"

you resist the very strong urge to roll your eyes, instead nodding politely and listening as the woman who approached you launches into a conversation about her husband and how he and frank got along at work and really you couldn't care less.

you were at the work event frank had mentioned in the morning. he did end up picking up his own dry cleaning and you saw him briefly at the event when you first showed up, only saying a quick hello and kissing your cheek before he was off again mingling and entertaining guests.

you had intended on just sticking to the bar and making use of the free-flow alcohol but now this woman was talking to you about her kids, and whatever else and you really just want to throw your drink in her face and yell at her about how to read a room.

you spot frank in the corner of your eye, surrounded by a group of women. you knew he had slept with other people ever since you stopped accepting his advances and affection. you're honestly surprised he hasn't asked for a divorce yet.

but frank was kinder than you. you were still his friend before you were his wife. he still cared about you and didn't want you to be left alone. you couldn't seem to convince him you were fine alone. you learnt to be fine when sana left. although lately, even he seemed to see you less as a friend and more and more, just as his wife.

▂▂⌇

"i still can't believe that time you thought danny was a good choice for you. and you defended him too!" sana was laughing, slapping your arm playfully.

you whine in response, "i told you i was sorry for that alright!!"

she's still laughing when frank comes back to the two of you, looking at you inquisitively and gesturing vaguely towards sana. you shrug, helping him set the food he had ordered for the three of you on the table.

"what's funny sana?" he asks, sliding into the booth with you and picking up a burger.

sana's waving a chip around now, pointing at you, "just talking about y/n's shitty taste in men."

frank fakes shock, looking at you with an exaggerated look of hurt, "me?"

you laugh, hitting him lightly, "not you dummy."

"yeah you're one of the good ones franky. probably the only good one out there."

"aww thanks sana."

sana grins, digging into her food.

you smile at the two of them. your two favourite people in the world. when you first met frank, you were skeptical of him. you were sure he was only trying to be friends with you to get with sana. so imagine your surprise when he had actually been plotting with sana behind your back to ask you out. you had said yes of course, he was a sweet guy, attractive too, and most importantly, sana liked him.

you ended up hitting it off, and the three of you were almost inseparable after that.

it wasn't until about 7 months into your relationship that sana started distancing herself. she would say she was busy, turn down more offers to go out, start hanging around a new group of people.

you heard from frank later that they had some sort of disagreement, which was why sana had started avoiding you. you were hurt by this though, because sana was still your friend. she was yours before you were frank's, and even when you were frank's you were still hers. didn't she know that? she had to.

you intended for her to know that when you cornered her, a late afternoon on a friday when the three of you used to go out for ice-cream as a reward for the week's end, but she had been staying behind to study or always had something else on instead.

"why are you avoiding me?"

sana's eyes are everywhere, her movements skittish as she tries to look for an escape before giving up and huffing. "i don't know what you're talking about."

"yes you do."

"no i don't."

"stop this sana. frank told me the two of you fought. if you don't want to be around him fine. that's your choice. but that doesn't mean you get to avoid me too."

she looks at you then, eyes fiery, "is that what he told you?"

you nod, "i don't understand sana. i don't care that you fought. i can seperate us and my relationship with frank. you're still my best friend."

"we fought because he told me he felt like i was stealing you from him."

"what?"

"yeah. he said he never got to spend any time with you. i was always there. he felt like he was the one who was third-wheeling our relationship."

the words third-wheel and our relationship swim around in your mind, "w-what? that's impossible!"

"is it really though y/n?" sana's voice is soft now.

"what do you mean?"

"i mean, is it really impossible for you to see us that way? frank obviously did, and he felt threatened by that."

"w-what- sana what are you talking about?"

she sighs a little in frustration, and then suddenly she's yanking you forward by the collar and planting her lips against yours. you react automatically, kissing her back, hands immediately going to her waist as you revel in the feeling of her soft lips against yours. it was always so different kissing sana compared to all the other guys you've been with. you chalked it up to the fact that sana took care of her skin, her lips, the way she smelled, all of that made kissing her that much sweeter.

but then you remember frank and you're pulling away, breaths heavier than they were mere seconds ago. "what the fuck sana?!" you're whipping your head around, looking to see if anyone had seen the two of you. it seemed to be clear.

sana's chuckling lowly, wiping at her lips, face downcast.

"what were you thinking?! i'm with frank! you set me up with frank!"

her eyes meet yours again, and you're taken back by the glassy look on her face. she's whispering, "i know. i know and i hate myself for it. i thought- i thought if- i thought i could get over this if i saw you happy with someone else. and then you were! and i just felt worse y/n. and then frank could tell and that was the last straw i guess. i needed to be away, away from you so i could get make these stupid feelings go away. i'm sorry y/n i'm so so sorry."

you're dumbfounded, staring at her blankly when she starts sobbing, hands coming to wipe at tears falling faster than she could catch them.

you don't understand what this means, what you felt, all you knew in that moment was sana was crying. the person you cared about most in the world was crying and you were the reason for it. so you do the one thing to make her stop. you tilt her chin up, heart breaking at the sniffles and the watery eyes, and you press your lips against hers again.

you end up where you've ended up so many times. legs entangled, sweaty bodies on sheets, heavy breathing, and minds lost.

▂▂⌇

you couldn't stand being inside anymore. it was suffocating.

you breathe out smoke as you exhale, the cigarette end still burning.

you watch as someone makes their way outside, shuffling around a little in their pockets and cursing when they realise they don't have a lighter.

the person looks towards you and you hold out yours. you help them light the end of their cigarette and nod when they mutter their thanks, inhaling the smoke into their lungs and standing awkwardly to the side.

it's a few minutes here in the cold, and you're almost finished your cigarette, about to throw it away when the stranger speaks up.

"do i know you from somewhere?"

you pause, looking back, you don't think you recognise this person. "you must have me confused for someone else, i'm sorry."

"wait... no you're sana's best friend right!?"

you drop the cigarette in your hand in shock. it had been a long time since someone had said that name out loud. she only ever lived in your head, it was hard to believe she was someone to other people too.

"right yes of course i remember now! i'm momo i was sana's roommate in college. although you probably don't remember i think we only really met like once. sana was always with you around campus and posted you a lot though so i remember you."

you vaguely recall the woman as she chatters away excitedly.

"right... momo... it's nice to meet you. i'm y/n."

momo grins, "have you spoken to sana lately? i don't think i saw you at the wedding, although i may have just been drunk." she chuckles a little at herself, not realising the way your face drops.

"wedding?"

momo looks at you a little in confusion, "yeah. last month? sana got married in sapporo."

your head is spinning with the new information. sana was married?

“woah you feeling okay?” momo’s reaching out for your shoulder, steadying you. you didn’t even realise you had lost your balance.

“i-i- yeah sorry.”

“you sure? are you here with anyone? anyone i can call?”

“no. it’s okay, thank you though.”

“yeah no problem.”

she’s shuffling back again, sucking on her cigarette.

“sana and i haven’t spoken in years. i was just a little surprised is all.” you speak up when you feel a little steadier on your feet.

“oh shit! i’m so sorry y/n i had no idea!”

“it’s okay, it seems no one really does.” you laugh a little bitterly.

momo doesn’t know how to respond to this, flicking her eyes between you and the door.

“it’s fine though. i’m happy for her.” the words taste vile on your tongue. is this what sana felt when she watched you walk down the aisle on your wedding day?

momo softens a little, “she is happy.” she offers you a kind smile, tapping out her cigarette and mumbling a quick thanks before heading back inside.

once you're sure she's gone you let yourself break down. sobs wrack your body as you hold your hands over your mouth trying to quiet them. you can barely see through the tears streaming out of your eyes. this was it. you'd finally lost her. you couldn't cling to the delusion that somewhere out there, some of her still belonged to you, some of her happiness, her memories, her love. you'd lost all of that now.

▂▂⌇

"what was that y/n?"

"what?"

"don't fuck with me right now. that was frank wasn't it? on the phone just then?"

you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, "what do you want me to say sana?"

"that you're keeping your promise. that you're going to return to him, break up with him, and then you're going to come back here to me. and then we can finally start our lives together."

"it's not that easy sana."

she explodes, "what do you mean?! it is that easy y/n! you told me when you came here that you and frank were over. have been for years. and now you can't tell me that same thing?"

"i don't- no sana-"

"what? what y/n? what’s your excuse now? do you have to make sure your job is secure? after you've spent a whole fucking month here you expect me to think you still care about that? do you have a child with him? is that it? is he sick? what other possible excuse is there for 'it's not that easy sana'?!"

"you don't get it! you can't say that to me sana!"

"what?! what don't i get?! tell me y/n, let's sort this shit out right fucking now. tell me why you can't be with me."

"it's not- that's just the way i am sana! i can't-"

"you told me you loved me. was that a lie then?" her eyes are brimming with tears, anger evident and your heart breaks again. you promised, you promised her and you promised yourself that this wouldn't happen again.

you're quick to step in again, trying to stop her from crying the one way you know how, brushing her cheeks with your thumbs and kissing her.

she doesn't let you get away with it this time though. she rips away from you, placing a hand on your chest and pushing you back lightly, keeping you literally at arm's length.

"don't do that." she's chuckling, her laughs mixed in with quiet sobs, "don't think you can just kiss away your problems. that's not how real life works y/n."

"please sana, please just-"

"what? you want me to be okay being your secret again? you want to be able to go around in public with frank only to come home to me? you can't have both y/n! i'm not going to do that again for you!"

you’re both crying now, standing across from each other in sana’s apartment, a place that’s felt more like home to you in a month than your place with frank has felt for you in six years.

your voice comes out in a hoarse whisper when you speak up, “i can’t- i can’t feel like this sana.”

sana’s wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. then she’s turning on her heel and heading into the bedroom.

you follow her, you’d follow her anywhere, but your heart sinks when you realise she’s going around the room picking up your belongings and shoving them into your bag.

“w-wait s-sana, what- what are you doing? stop please-“

you’re almost begging, scrambling after her trying to pull her back but she’s stubborn, she’s able to fill the bag within a minute and then she’s pushing it into you, and out the door.

“please! sana please i can’t lose you again don’t do this please- you’re my best friend sana.”

she’s managed to successfully push you out the front door now, still crying. “but you’re not mine y/n. you were never my best friend. you were always the love of my life. and you can’t be that for me anymore. so leave. please. don’t try and find me again.”

“n-no sana please d-don’t-“

“you’d have to stop the world just to stop what you feel for me y/n. but you don’t realise that. and i’m sick of loving someone who can’t give me all of that love back.”

and then she’s slamming her door shut in your face, the both of you sobbing on opposite sides of the door, hearts shattered a second time, and later, when it happens a third time, it’s only the sound of yours breaking.

[ohcaptains]

sit around and miss you

pairing. frank castle x female! reader. an. hello!!!! pls reblog & comment if u like !!! love u warnings. 18+. female receiving penetration, spit play (!!in mouth!!), detailed descriptions of violence, use of the word sir, references to somnophilia (but not actually happening), mouth covering? with hand. frank’s a big meany who loves you.

synopsis. frank’s antsy after a night shift, especially when his buddies were talking smack about how he’s leaving you in bed all alone.

Sometimes, Frank works nights.

It used to be his full-time gig, but now that he’s moved onto a new line of work, he only has to do it once a week. On the Jobsite for eight pm, finish at four am. In bed by five. Showered. 

His hair damp and sticking on end from where he’d shoved a towel through it, too tired to care about the consequences of sleeping with it wet.

Just wants to get into bed, curl up behind you, and breathe morning sunshine, into the skin of your back before sleeping until lunchtime.

Every so often though, he gets distracted.

When he’s wired from being on a construction site for the last eight hours, and from the coffee he’d consumed, gallons of it, you’d said, but it was more like a litre – he’s not ready to sleep.

See’s you snuggled up in your shared bed.

Blanket stuffed between your limbs, legs wrapped around the fabric, letting him see the bare skin of your legs and the little slither of skin at the bottom of your back from where your shirt has risen. Cute little sleep socks fuzzy around your ankles. 

The skin of your thighs, soft on top of the duvet, and the way your shorts didn’t really fit you anymore, but every summer night you tugged the washed-out cotton on, driving Frank crazy by the way the fabric stops just after it starts.

I think it’s time to get new shorts sweetheart.

Your smug smile as you scrunch your face up. You don’t really mean that.

He didn’t. 

Same way he didn’t really want to let you sleep. 

Wanted to tug your shorts down and stretch you open. Slip inside of you. Feel how warm you are, all sleepy and groggy, whimpering his name as he says, shhh shh, go back to sleep baby. It’s just me. I’ll be quick I promise.

Franks wired again. 

Chomping at the god damn bit. 

The guys at work were giving him shit. In his onsite office, there’s a picture of you on his desk. One taken last summer. You’re smiling at the camera, glistening from the vitamin D, and dressed in a pretty, frilly, and short summer dress. 

A bunch of guys were in his office, talking about on loads and offloads when O’Brien made a whistling sound and tugged at the picture frame. “That your girl, Castle?” “That’s my wife, O’Brien.” “Damnnnnn,” Simpson sounded, taking the frame, “and you left that in bed to come here?”

Yeah. He did. And he felt bad about it every time. Even if before he left, you’d cup his face and kiss his forehead, saying, go bring home the bacon. Even if you pouted at his sad face, saying, you’ll be home soon. 

He imagined your pouty face then, as the guys were ogling over your picture.

Imagined you saying, Frank, again? As he dripped blood onto the welcome mat. Covered head to toe in it, the stains from what was left of O’Brien and Simpson.

Last time, I promise. You said that before.

Some guys just needed to be put down.

He thought about it. He really did. Thought about taking the paperweight you’d bought for him and slamming it against O’Brien’s head. Felt the impact, feeling it rattle through his frame before breathing a sigh of relief.

Then again, maybe not.

That didn’t stop him from laughing along with his buddies, though, as he got up from his chair. Stating a level of calm as he walked around his desk, nodding, saying, yeah, yeah, I did, as he took the frame from Simpson’s fingers, and then dropped his smile. 

Going completely serious. 

Face a death mask, absolutely nothing going on behind his black eyes. The boys’ laughter turned nervous. High pitch sounds trailed off, looking at each other for help as Frank stood there silently, time ticking by.

He could do it for hours.

He hadn’t needed to, though.

“Hey, Castle—” a voice from the door, punctuated by a knock. “They need you at the drop site.”

He chooses to ignore how wired he is.

He chooses to sit at the edge of the bed you share and stare into the darkness, the moonlight cutting the room in half from the slits in the blinds. Chooses to ignore the desire swimming in his belly. 

The feeling that’s been brewing since the guys made their comments. The feeling that burns deep, so deep sometimes that it scares him. 

The feeling to take. To possess. To consume.

You blink awake suddenly, the feeling of someone in the room waking you up. There’s a white figure in front of you, turned on its side from your position. 

You let out a little breath of surprise, whispering, “Frank?” in a concerned tone. He shifts quickly, turning round to face you. Messy damp hair and fingers combing through his beard.

“Hi baby,” he greets, whispering so as to not disturb you further. Still, you sit up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “Did you just get in?” “Half an hour ago?” He watches you shift across the bed, the moonlight bathing you, reminding him that you went to sleep in shorts and a thin tank top. “Mm,” you begin, sitting on your knees in front of him, “and you’re just sitting there?” “Mm-hmm,” he nods, black eyes tracing your features. “Like a weirdo,” you tease, raising a brow. He doesn’t laugh, just chews on his bottom lip and watches you. Sees the way you sit on the backs of your thighs, your hands on the tops, arms inadvertently pushing your breasts together in your thin vest. “I guess so,” he trails off. “What’s up?” you frown. He gives you a non-committed shrug. “Something happen at work?”

He blinks.

Bingo.

There it is.

Still, he shrugs. Doesn’t say a word as his eyes drunkenly study your features, seeing your puffy lips, and sleepy face. The way you wait so patiently for an answer. He knows that It’s just because you’ve just woken up. 

Any normal day, you’d be scoffing, saying, I’m not a mind reader, Frank, before dramatically rolling your eyes.

His finger comes out to smooth over your hip.

“Frank,” you whisper, cocking your head to the side. It didn’t matter that you’d been together for what had felt like a millennium – Frank got quiet. Tried to hide his demons in his silence. In his hard face and busted nose. 

You reach out, now, and trace the bumps there, cooing, saying, I can’t help if I don’t know.

He smells shower fresh. His hard, scarred skin is soft and clean. Hair damp at the edges, beard a little wet, too. Pretty. His naked back flexing – tense. Muscular chest the same, yet you trail the length of his nose. Delicately lift your finger and trace the outline of his eyebrows, leaning forward. Frank stays where he is. 

Tell me, you breathe.

Frank decides to show you.

Something snaps. That tense, that clench that he was holding onto disperses into the night as his big palm comes out and collects your waist, driving your back into the pillows as his body hovers over you. 

Surprised, a shocked sound tumbles from your mouth before Frank covers it, tasting your sleep and mint with his quick tongue.

It consumes you.

You’re still in that groggy, half-awake phase and it causes you to react slowly. You’re silent and unmoving from his touch until your body awakens.

Ohhh. So, this was what he was fighting? You wonder, feeling his big, bumpy nose mesh against your cheek as he kisses you, mouth hungry and skilled, tinged with a little desperation, then a lot as your legs lazily open, his body slotting against yours perfectly.

He grumbles against your mouth, your crotch brushing against his chest. 

The sound echoes throughout the night, throughout your bewildered body, and it forces your thighs to tighten around him, feet crossing over at the bottom of his back and slackly pushing at the elastic of his sleep trousers. Digging into the muscle of his ass and across the scar there.

He pulls away, your mouth trailing after his until his big hand comes into view, tightening around your jaw. 

The ghost of a smile finds your lips, one that makes Frank go warm. Though, he frowns. “The guys at work were talking about you.” The admission makes you mimic his face. “They saw the picture I have of you…asked how I could leave a woman like you all alone in bed.”

A woman like you. A woman like me? you think. “Gosh, such a travesty,” you say, rolling your eyes. You introduce a pout, your tone twisting into a mocking sound. “Oh, Frank! What ever would I do without my man?” “Shut up,” he grumbles. Still, you carry on, a light-hearted, sleepy smile on your face as you clutch his chest. “I am lost, lost without you! Whenever you’re away, I just sit around and miss you!”

Which is not entirely wrong, if you’re being honest. Frank’s face gets hard. “It pissed me off, having them question me. Question…” my love for you. “Ohhh,” you whisper, leaning up to brush against his wanting mouth. “So, you want to show them who’s boss?” Frank shakes his head. “They’re right, how on earth could I leave you alone in our bed?” He mouths at the dip at your neck. Tongue jutting out to lick at your skin, making your mouth open to the white of your ceiling.

His large, bear-like palm flattens across your body, smoothing down your side to the small shorts. “Especially dressed like this.” He’s half-hard against you already, cock pushing against the bottom of your belly. The feel of him is a welcome one. It fuels you on – makes you act on instinct and rut your hips up into him, grinding your crotch against his length.

“Oh fuck,” he curses, the end of the word high pitch and breathy. You carry on grinding your clothed cunt against him, feeling him swell, hearing his breathing quicken and he tries to hide it, tries to muffle it against the hot skin of your neck but it’s no use. “God,” you gasp, clenching as the head of his cock brushes at your clit. The side of his face comes into view, and he moves to kiss the underside of your jaw. 

Moves lower, mouth trailing over your collar bones while his big fingers tug at the elastic of your vest, forcing your tits to spill out.

With your fingers in his long hair, he mouths at your hardened nipple, tongue lapping at the skin and sucking it into his mouth. “I nearly killed them, I swear,” he grumbles, sucking a bruise into the soft skin. Your sleepy brain remembers how this started.

He would have and don’t you know it.

But, right now, you’re too focused on the feeling of his calloused hand gently rubbing at your skin. Too focused on the wet of his mouth spreading over your breast, his teeth running over you ever so gently, forcing you to gasp his name. You rake your nails lower, over the top of his hard, muscular back. Ground-up again, hips rolling against the tense skin of his chest.

God, you’re tired. So fucking turned on, too. The drowsy feeling, mixed with the heightened sensation of his cock still pushing at your clit makes you loopy, makes you mouldable. 

He’s being so gentle with you, yet his words are venomous – tinged with hate. “Smash their heads in for even looking at you.”

He would, too.

Back then, probably. Didn’t he do that one time? …you can’t remember.

Big bad Frank Castle. Your, big bad Frank Castle, who’s leaving marks over your chest with his tongue, mumbling out, kill em, for looking at my pretty girl.

He tongues your nipple, chuckling at himself. “I will pay thousands of dollars to keep the heating on, just so you can go to bed in outfits like these every night,” Frank declares. 

You close your eyes and arch your back, a dreamy smile on your face as you tease, “What’s the point if you just leave me here all alone though?”

He stops. In the dark, you can feel his breathing fluttering against your face. Dragging your eyes open, he’s there, that big nose that you love, the wet lips you dream about. Black eyes that make you squirm.

“Hi,” you giggle, thinking it’s funny. Frank’s face is serious, though.

“You laughing at me, baby?” he asks. “No way,” you sound, shaking your head. Still, there’s delirium in your eyes. In the silence of the night, Frank watches you. Sees you chewing on your lips, and sees the way you’re lazily blinking at him.

“What’s the matter?” he asks softly. “M'sleepy.”

Suddenly, Frank feels like an asshole.

His face crumbles.

You see it happening, see his self-hatred rearing up to come and grab him.

“I’m sorry, baby—I,” he starts, and Nononono, you think. Quickly, you shake your head. Kiss his lips to quiet him, peck at his cheek, his thick neck, “m’want you, though,” you mumble against him, hoping the words seep into his skin. 

Frank’s silent, contemplative. You slide your fingers back into his hair, mould your mouth to his and hitch your hips up, sliding your clothed pussy against his dick.

“M’was dreaming about you,” you admit, and the admission forces a pained groan out of him. He kisses you back, albeit with less vigour than before. Battling with himself. “Whenever you’re gone, I always do. Think about moments like this,” you carry on, grinding your hips into him, whimpering out when the head of his dick meets your clit again and your tone is breathless as you whisper against his mouth, “think about waking up with you inside of me.” You swear he whimpers, but the sound disperses as he meshes his mouth deeper, tongue pushing against yours with his big hand wandering over your body. 

Over your tits, stomach, until he stuffs it between your legs, dragging a desperate whine from you, then the truth.

“When um all sleepy, and groggy.”

His fingers push at the damp fabric – against your clit. The pressure makes you blind, makes you carry on.

“and you’re just so big on top of me,” you sigh, tasting his spit, imaging him, then feeling him, his body a weighted blanket.

“and you’re telling me to shhh, covering my mouth and just saying, take it.” He mutters something against you, but you can’t hear it. Can just feel him, rolling your clit round and round, your slick pooling in your shorts. 

It makes your back arch, makes you sob his name into his mouth before he opens his eyes and juts his spare hand out, taking your jaw in his big palm again.

Your breath catches, pussy clenches at the sensation, and it makes you whimper out, “I want you inside of me.”

Frank says, okay baby, and spits in your mouth.

You hear it before you see it, or taste it, even. Hear the wet sound, then feel it trickling over your lips and chin, pooling above his fingers at your jaw.

Like a trained pet, your tongue comes out, silently begging, again.

You know it’s just your tired, groggy brain talking, but It feels like a fucking religious experience. He spits into your mouth again, dribbles onto your wanting tongue, forcing your cunt to clench again, clit throbbing – aching, as you taste him.

He kisses the remainder away, his tongue flat and dragging your mouth into his. He’s still moving his big finger, still dragging your clit in tight, skilled circles. 

You cry again, the sound twisting into a moan as he hits a nerve. Heat pools at your lower back. You clench again, pouting against his mouth.

“I know,” Frank soothes, and he does, can feel it, feel how wet you are, fabric slick with you.

So, he speeds up and hears your resulting cries as you clench the duvet in your fists, tits bouncing as your body shudders.

Frank bends down and takes one in his mouth. He runs his teeth over your nipple and you’re sobbing, throwing your head back and clinging to his hair. Hips grinding into his hand, nodding, whispering, “please, oh god, please.” “Shh, shh, baby,” he coos, then, he smiles, “take it.”

You come then, fingers stuffed into his hair, his name tumbling from your lips. The feeling spreads over your thighs, your cunt, in your belly, your slick leaking into your underwear. “God, oh my fucking god,” you sob, clenching, Frank’s finger’s still going, and you try and push him away, squirming, the pressure overwhelming but he’s a stone, mouth still sucking at your nipple.

You can’t come down. The feeling never ends, instead, it triples with his movement, making your nerves shot, and overstimulated.

“F-Frank,” you sob, and he must hear your tone because when you shove your hands down to push his away, he lets you.

Drags his mouth up to kiss you. Swallows down your whimpers. Says, there you go, with his damp fingers brushing over your own. He lets you sober up, even if the feeling has made you drunk. Made you liquid.

“You ready to take me now, pretty?” His dark husk asks. The thought makes you cry. “Yes please,” you shiver, reaching up to kiss him. You’re still so eager, greedy, begging him to push inside of you with your deep kiss and wandering hands. “Atta girl,” Frank compliments, the words washing over you, making you dumb. “Let’s get your shorts off, huh?”

Clothes on the floor, Frank’s lining himself up with your aching hole. You watch, legs spread open, then feel him start to push the head in. 

“Shit,” you hiss, head falling back – pussy clenching around him already. He slides his hands over the inside of your thighs and the feeling goes straight to your clit.

“Relax baby,” he whispers, eyes flicking up to yours, “or I’m not gonna fit.”

You nod, breathing, “Okay.” Then, “Okay, okay, okay.” “Shh shh shh,” he repeats, bending his head down to kiss you. Your arms come around the back of his head, running your fingers through his hair, taking his lips, and sinking back into the bed. “That’s it,” he whispers, his voice a husk, his praise melting you, making you loose and slack.

Slowly, he guides himself in. Big enough to stretch you open and the sound of your pussy squelching fills your ears, followed by Frank grunting, the grumble spilling into your open mouth. 

God, he slips all the way in. Fills you up so full that you cry, stutter a sob, breath caught in the back of your throat. Brain going cloudy, body melting into his.

“You’re so pretty like this,” Frank mutters, slotting his lips over yours, “stuffed with my cock.”

“Oh my God,” you quiver, shaking your head, begging for him to just shut up cause he’s making you lightheaded. He’s so deep inside of you, just staying there, cock twitching, forcing a pout onto your lips as he looks at you, so fucking close.

Like he’s inside of you, consuming you, and sometimes you wish he did. Sometimes you want him to climb inside of your body and take over. Wear you like a fucking puppet. 

How do you miss him when he’s right there? On top of you, kissing at your swollen lips and soothing you with his words.

He pushes his hands under your thighs and lifts your hips. The position slides him deeper. Makes his cock push up into you, into that spongy part inside of you that forces your eyes to roll back, your cunt clenching around him so tight that he hisses, groaning deeply. He shakes his head as if he can’t believe it.

“’take me so good baby, s’like you were made for me.” “I was,” you respond because he’s made you honest. In the delirium of him, you’re saying whatever he wants. Saying what you’ve had buried inside of you for so long, waiting for moments like this. 

When he slides his dick out, the ridges of him pushing against your walls, then slowwwwlyyy sinks back in, you’re spilling some of those truths.

“It’s true,” you weep, voice whiny and desperate. 

Mouth against his, kissing him sloppily, the sound of your pussy taking him filling the room.

“I do sit around and miss you,” you admit, and Frank punctuates the comment by fucking up into you, rolling his hips upwards and god you’re moaning, clutching the back of his head and his face is all fuzzy from your hooded eyes, your mouth still wet with his spit and you give it back to him, tongue sliding into his mouth to take him and take him and take him and, “I’m yours,” you weep.

Frank fucking laughs.

Laughs into your mouth, the sound of it twinged with frenzy.

He shakes his head, “I’ve trained you so god damn well, haven’t I?” and thrusts into you, splitting you open with his cock. The response bursts from your mouth -- “Yes,” you sob, nodding and chewing on your bottom lip. “You just wait here, sitting pretty in our bed until I come home, huh?” “Yes sir,” you agree, and it’s not even like that. Not once has he even hinted that he wanted it like that, but fuck the word just came out. Fell out of your pretty mouth and Frank goes wild with it, groans deep, grunts, Jesus Christ, and starts fucking you faster to thank you. “Is that how you want it?” he asks, his black eyes pouring into yours. Your pussy is still sensitive from coming earlier. Sopping wet, puffy, and swollen from his fingers and now from his cock pushing up into you. 

The feeling pulls out more truths, and they’re lined with the high pitch, desperate whines that only come out when he’s fucking you like this.

You shake your head.

“No?” he asks, raising a thick brow.

You giggle, then, and the sweet sound is twisted with a loud groan as his big fingers come down and stuff into your pussy, pushing at your clit. Your body goes white-hot.   “How do you want it then baby?” he asks. “I just wanna feel you,” you whisper, so fucked out that you’ve lost your voice. You drag your fingers across the muscles in his upper back, fiddle with his hair and carry on, “wanna feel you come inside of me.” He growls. Growls as if he’s a god damn dog and buries his red face into your shoulder, hiding from you and your effect on him.

It makes you whine, “m’wanna see you, too.”

“Wanna see me,” he mutters to himself, appearing from your shoulder.

Frank reaches back and collects your arms – pushes them behind you, his wide palm locking around your wrists. The movement makes you stutter.

“Look at me then, baby,” he orders.

He’s got you stretched out and open for him – free to be toyed with. Open enough that you feel the cool air on your hot skin. Feel his eyes everywhere, consuming you as he leans back and studies your body. Looks at the swell of your tits, the fabric of your vest stretched beneath them. 

The skin at your stomach. Spread of your pussy as his thighs keep you sprawled open. Looks at you with his Black eyes – a god damn demon – wearing that look, animalistic.

“Should take a picture of you like this,” he mumbles. Slowly, he moves his damp fingers upwards, spreading your slick across your lower stomach. “I’ll frame it and put it on my desk.”

The comment fills you with shame because you’re agreeing, nodding your head then hiding it in the crook of your arm.

Whatever he wants. Whatever Frank wants.

“That’s right, sweetheart. S’whatever Frank wants.”

Hadn’t realised you’d said it out loud, but it’s there, now, so you nod. 

Nod and nod and nod and say whatever Frank wants Frank gets and he groans, grunts, says, attagirl. My perfect girl. My sweet, sweet girl, lemme make you come again. Want you to come around my fucking cock and he leans down, spreads you open and starts speaking into your neck, fucking you steadily, fingers rolling your clit around in tight, wet circles. 

Give it to me sweetheart, you gonna let me have it?

You’re seeing stars. 

Vision blurry and white, nothing but the feeling of Frank to ground you. Words tumble out of your mouth, an endless trail of incoherent babble but it must make some sense because Frank responds. 

He nods, says, that’s it. Keeps going at his steady, skilled pace. Teeth run over the delicate skin of your throat, and you gasp, clenching around his cock, clenching tight enough that Frank curses. Says, “Shit – god damnit girl.”

Heat pools around your thighs, dialling down to your clit as Frank speeds his fingers up, pushing them into the nerve, forcing you to gush around him. 

Tight, neck straining, back arching, and god you can feel it washing over you, feel it coming up, reaching up to come and grab you. 

“Frank,” you whine, aching and breathless. It’s just his name. Brain filled up with the five letters.

“Frank, Frank – God.”

Your pussy tightens around his cock like a vice, clenching hard and unyielding and Frank groans, nodding, going, “shit, can fucking feel it.” Everything is pressurised. Eagerly, you push your hips up into his cock, locking your legs around his waist, tightening up like a clam. “God,” you say again, and It comes out as if you’re pleading. “That’s it,” Frank soothes. Kisses you, deep and long, tongue tasting your desperation and you whine around it, skin a live wire. “Don’t stop,” you beg against his damp mouth. “Please don’t stop I’m gonna come baby, I’m gonna—” Frank’s palm comes up and flattens over your mouth.

“Stop talking about it and fucking come then.”

That’s it. He bullies you over the edge with his mean marching order and you weep, nod, eyes rolling back into your head as your clit throbs, spasming, heat flooding over your groin and making you tighten your entire body around him.

Frank fucks you through it. Releases the pressure, his Cock slick with you, white and sopping and everything aches but it feels so god damn good that it doesn’t matter.

He’s hovering, inches away from your face -- watching you through wild eyes. “Shit,” he groans as your pussy carries on clenching around his cock, the feeling not stopping. 

It bleeds through your subconscious; makes you babble against his palm. Frank looks at where your bodies join, at where he’s pushed deep into your pussy. “Jesus christ--” he drags, “look at you, milking my god damn cock.”

When he pulls his hand away from your mouth, your sobs fill the room. Echo against the walls. A choking gasp muddled with his name. 

“Thank you,” you tremble, body shaking with the come down. “Oh my fucking God, thank you.”

He lets go of your hands, too, letting them come around to cradle the back of his head. He shakes it, face sincere, slowing his movements to let you catch up. Come back down to earth. “I haven’t even given you what you wanted yet, baby. I still gotta come inside.”

Coming has had you lightheaded. Has made your brain fuzzy and static, so you giggle, dragging Frank’s mouth back to yours. He makes a pleased sound, “that okay with you sweetheart?” he mumbles.

You push your hips up into him, whimpering from the sensitivity.

“s’whatever Frank wants, remember?” you whisper.

Frank grins, “Damn straight.”

[ff-imagines]

Can i request some nsfw headcanons for mantis shrimp? I read through your blog and let me just say: I'm a big fan. Btw if you dont wanna do them thats fine as well

Salt and pepper shrimp: nsfw alphabet

I did the whole alphabet bc? Why not! Side note I rly wanna write a fic going off my thoughts ab his experience level >:)

A - aftercare

Look, getting him to release you from his hold to go to the bathroom on a regular night is a battle enough. After sex? Phew I wish you luck. Might wanna just put some water on your night stand beforehand. You would be able to convince him to take a bath with you pretty easily though, he likes how the warm water feels very much. Make sure to cuddle him in the bath still, he's in a very vulnerable state right now and he really needs some good old tlc.

B- body parts

he’s got a weird fixation with your hands. He likes to compare hand sizes, whether your hands are bigger or smaller isn’t what he likes, he just likes to admire them. He loves sucking/biting your fingers while he’s got you in his lap. Lacing your fingers with his with one hand while bringing the other to his cheek, nuzzling into your hand while he bounces you on his cock.

On himself, there is tragically little that he genuinely likes. He views himself as a weapon, getting him to unlearn that will not be an easy process, trust me, Boston has tried. Complimenting his eyes does seem to make him a little more flustered than other praises, and he has a hard time staring you in the eye during sex…. maybe we can start there.

C - cum

His cum is pretty thin but there’s a shit ton of it. Enough that if he cums inside you swear you can feel the warmth as his cock pours rope and rope of his seed into you.

He doesn’t actually care where he cums, just ask him and he’ll comply.

inside you? sounds good.

On your back? Say less.

On the floor? You’re cleaning it, but sure.

He did discover he’s got an affinity for watching his cum on your tongue. I don’t know how you’d be able to swallow it all, but any attempt you make will be met with shrimp getting hard all over again.

D - dirty secret

He secretly thinks it’d be really hot for you to dom him. It’s gonna take a very long time before he’s comfortable letting you have that Linda control over him, just the thought of being tied up, hands behind his back while you praise him for being such a good boy, its a fantasy he’s visited on many sleepless nights.

E - experience

Nope. Nada. To be frank, I think he’s the definition of Demisexual, and he has yet to meet anyone besides Boston and the anti-human gang who he genuinely wants to get to know better. He definitely hasn’t met anyone who wants to get to know better for romantic reasons.

He doesn’t know enough about human customs to know that it can be embarrassing for someone to be inexperienced, but he does feel very very nervous the first few times. He’ll need a lot of reassurance, give him praise and he’s putty in your hands.

F - favorite position

I'm gonna be boring and say missionary. It’s simple, easy, and since he’s brand new to all of this it’s the least mentally overstimulating. He very much likes that he can see your face.

If he’s feeling extra spicy he might grab onto the inside of your knees and push you into the mating press, though he really only does this if he’s upset or jealous.

If you ask nicely he might let you sit in his lap, as a treat. Bouncing on his cock as he litters your chest with bite marks, what a treat it is <3

G - goofy

…. yea for sure definitely. He’s a real jokester.

On a serious note, he himself is not a goofy person whatsoever, but he would actually like it if you were. Outright making fun of him or harsh teasing is an immediate turn off, but light jokes to ease his nerves is for sure welcomed since he’s very tense the first few times.

Give him time and you might even catch him cracking a small joke himself, all the while giving you a weak, nervous smile.

H- hair

He doesn’t trim or shave anything lmao. He’s busy, and also doesn’t care literally at all. He’s got a thin happy trail that can be easy to miss since he's blonde.

He’s got the same energy with your body hair, he doesn’t care. If you do shave he might ask why, just out of curiosity. If your reason is insecurity, he’ll probably suggest you let it grow, he doesn’t care and he’s the only one who’ll ever see it lmao

I- intimacy

It’s an awkward “i hope to fuck I’m doing this right” kind of intimacy. He fumbles and messes up a lot, he might even accidentally miss when thrusting and end up just kinda rubbing himself on you but he’s really trying. Just from the fact he’s willing to try this at all with you is a big sign that he’s really trying his best to be as intimate as he can with you.

J- jerk off

Before meeting you, not a lot actually. He mostly just did it if he ever woke up from a wet dream and knew that if he didn’t take care of it now he’d never be able to get back to sleep.

After your first time together, his first time, he thinks back the immeasurable pleasure a lot, finding himself in need of relief a lot more than he ever did before. You are the catalyst to his drive, and you are also the only thing he can think about that can help him cum. It’s kinda sweet in a perverted way.

K- Kinks

He will bite you. It’s just so easy to bruise you and it makes your relationship status to others so obvious, he can’t just… not bite you.

Marking, going along with the biting kink. This goes both ways, he’d love for you to scratch at his back enough to leave red marks, to bite as his collarbone, grip his hips tight enough to bruise. He likes looking at the marks later, they remind him that he did good, he made you feel good, that’s all he really wants.

He doesn’t exactly have a breeding kink as much as this goes along with the marking aspect. Suggest to him that he cum deep inside you to mark your insides… he might give you 2-3 loads just to make sure you're nice and full, completely claimed.

He also kinda likes to make you cry. Overstimulating you to the point of tears gives him a sense of pride he hasn’t really felt before.

He really likes temperature play as well, dragging ice cubes and hot wax across your skin and watching you flinch and squirm just does something to him.

And of course, light bondage. He probably found out it was a thing after reading some kinda erotic fiction and immediately went to you like “why did you not tell me about this?????” He adores how to look all tied up and stuck, right in the palm of his hands. It makes him feel emotional as well, that you’re willing to give him such a powerful amount of control over you.

Last but not least, please praise him. During sex as well as day to day. Let him know he’s so pretty, he’s doing so good, he’s cock feels so so good, he might cum on the spot.

L- location

The first time he’d really need it to be in a secluded, safe area. He’s gotta feel comfy if he’s gonna get into the mood.

Every other time? Babes you’ve awakened a beast, he’ll get random spikes of “if I don’t at least try to fuck them I will scream”. You could be in the middle of a forest running from an axe wielding murderer and this horny bastard would still find a way to pull you aside and rail you against a tree.

There most likely isn’t a spot in your home that he hasn’t fucked you against.

Peaceful moment of washing dishes? Think again, he’s plopping you on the kitchen counter and diving to mouth at your neck.

Writing some papers? Just sit on his lap, you’ll feel much less stressed with his cock buried to the hilt, won’t you?

Doing laundry? Might have to rewash them cause now he’s using the clothes as a bed to fuck you on. He’ll apologize and help you fold them after they’re rewashed bc he feels bad lmao

M- motivation

Like I said, he’s set off by the smallest things. A little stretch, wiping some water off on your pants, humming a song, all of it can randomly make him feel the need to fuck you.

The most intense and quickest way to rile him up is either playing with his hair, or massaging his back. It starts out innocent but he just can’t take the thought of your pretty hands working so lovingly and not at least trying to reciprocate and make you feel good too.

N- no

No sharing. He doesn’t want someone else to see you, and he doesn’t want someone else to see him. It’s just not something he likes.

He also hates humiliation. He… would tolerate it if you asked for it, even if he doesn’t get why you’d want him to outright insult you. But for himself? Fuck no, he hates it so fuckin much. He’s a sensitive insecure puppy that wants your attention very badly, pls don’t hurt him like that :(

O- oral

Oh please give him oral. He’s begging. Well, he’d never outright beg but the way his eyes fixate on your mouth a lot is his way of silently pleading for you to wrap your lips around his cock. His soul ascends a little every time he sees his cum dribbling down your face, he might be even willing to make out with his cum still on your tongue.

As for giving, he’s got no clue what the hell he’s doing but he’s nervously eager to try. Guide him as best you can, he’s good at measuring your reactions so he can handle the rest. Tug on his hair a little bit if you wanna drive him crazy.

He’ll get a lot better with time, his eagerness to please however, does not leave him in the slightest.

P- pace

The first time? Slow and unsure, then he realizes “oh fuck this feels stupid good” and his pace becomes almost punishing. He doesn’t really know what he’s doing, he’s unknowingly going deeper and harder than you've ever been dicked down in your life. If you want him to, somehow, go harder? Grab his hand and place it over your stomach to make him feel his cock enter you through your skin, his hand slides down to grip your hips and slams into you, wiggling his hips without withdrawing to gain some of his sanity back before he’s back to a punishing pace.

Q- quickies

Oh hell yea. He lives for them. Sudden moments of horniness come to him all the time and since this spike in desire is brand new, he hasn’t really… learned to live with it yet. He pulls you aside into closets and alleyways all the time, he can’t help that you feel so warm and snug :(

R- risk

He doesn’t exactly enjoy the thought of a voyeur, he really doesn’t want to share you with anyone. But… there is a deeper part of him that finds a sense of pride if someone were to hear you getting absolutely pounded by him, desperately crying out and whining for him to go deeper, even better if they were someone who pined for you….

S- stamina

Well, to be frank he cums pretty quickly. It’s all so brand new to him, he really can’t help it. Lucky for you, his refractory time is crazy low. He can cum once, watch you do some mindless motion you always do and he’s right back to being hard again in minutes.

T- toys

Not against it, but is again, brand new to all this shit. He’s very interested in using your own toys against you though. Would definetly use a vibrater to edge and overstim you. He’d be interested in a cock ring, only if you were willing to endure a vibrator while he fucks you, he doesn’t wanna be the only one struggling lmao

U- unfair

He can be, yea. He kinda likes edging you, but not as much as he likes overstimulating you.

He loves to hear how you beg under him when he’s pulling you so close to the edge, keeping you just far enough to drive you insane.

Overstimming though? The way you twitch and beg, how your chest heaves and your mouth hangs open into a silent scream, eyes shut tight and watering, now that’s the good shit.

V- volume

Doesn’t talk much, but for sure gives out a lot of groans. This is something he’s never felt before in his life, the first few times you're going to get a lot of whines and surprised yelps, check up on him and make sure he’s still doing alright, he’s just very nervous.

As he gets more comfortable, he gives you quiet praises and promises to make you feel good. He also groans quite a lot, but since his voice is deeper it can be hard to catch.

W- wild card

He really wants to try using his prosthetic arm for temperature play, he’s just not at all confident in himself enough to bring it up. He likes the thought of you jumping and squirming under his touch, for now he can just stick to wax play.

X- X Ray

Mans is actually pretty fuckin big. He’s got no idea how big he is though. If you were surprised and a little nervous about his size he’d be pretty confused, is there something wrong? Did you change your mind? The concept of him being well above average is something you’ll have to explain later. It boosts his ego quite bit, even if he’d never admit it.

Whine about him being too big and you can just see the pride swelling in his chest, giving you no mercy with his thrusts.

Y- yearning

Often. Very very often. He’d fuck you multiple times every day if he had the time. However, you’re both busy, and you’d probably get a UTI with how many times this man wants to dick you down lmao. He’s got his cock buried in you at least 4-5 times a week.

Z- zzz

Actually pretty quickly. Even if he prefers being in control during sex, he kinda likes being the little spoon as he drifts to sleep. Give him some soft praises about how well he did and he’s turning into jello in your hold.

[yer-cute-when-you-scream]

day6 as boyfriends headcanons?? fluff and smut pls 🥺

A/N: I hope you enjoy this and I’m so sorry it took me so long to finish, I  had bad writer’s block );

Sungjin    

He gives you loving gazes all the time

You could be brushing your teeth and you look over to him

He’s looking at you like you’re his whole world

Oh, that’s right you are his whole world

“What? Do I have something on my face?”

“No, I just love looking at you.”

You have that romance movie cliché type of love

Your friends are jealous of the love you share together

However, he’s wary about PDA, but he will hold your hand in public

Maybe a kiss on the cheek

He just prefers to keep those intimate moments between the two of you

He occasionally serenades you with his guitar

Sometimes, you’ll ask him to play because it helps you fall asleep

He loves looking down to see you all curled up and hugging his pillow

Sex is absolutely amazing

You both praise the hell out of each other

It can get rough sometimes but that’s usually when he’s really stressed

But he always makes sure you’re okay with it beforehand too

He loves morning sex and the peppered kisses that come along with it

He loves the way you look when you’re riding him

It brings him to his knees every time

He will give you whatever you want if you ride him

You were sitting on the couch watching a show when you heard the front door open. You look over and you see Sungjin with his shoulders hanging low, he looks exhausted. He trudges over to you and you motion in front of you, “Sungjin, sit down,” you tell him, he gives a strange look but obliges. You help him take his jacket off and begin to massage his shoulders, working your hands to get the knots out. He lets out a few groans as he closes his eyes and relaxes under your touch. “Baby, why are you doing this?” he asks, curious at your sudden actions. “I knew you were practicing really hard today, I just wanted to help you relax a bit.” Your hands move down his arms, deeply massaging more. He lets his head fall back against your chest, turning his head to kiss your cheek. He wonders how he got so lucky to find someone like you.

 Jae

#1 Supportive Boyfriend

He loves making you happy

You both are always joking around and pranking the others together

He loves it when you wear his clothing

Especially when the first thing he sees in the morning is you in only his shirt

“Babe, you’re drooling.”

He always makes sure you have a few of his shirts and hoodies before he leaves on tour

You will never not have any confidence around this man

He always hypes you up

He doesn’t really care about PDA

He will give you a loving kiss in public like nobody is watching

Silent giggles at night

He’s so playful with you

Being absolute crackheads together

So much kissing in the morning…plus other things

Morning sex is his favorite thing

Most of the time it happens cause all you’re wearing is his shirt

He just lifts the shirt up and slides into you

Loves pleasing you

Always eats you out like you’re his last meal

Such an amazing lover omfg

He wants to watch you come undone beneath him

He’ll definitely overstimulate the hell out of you

You were walking in the park with Jae, laughing at each other's jokes and stories from when you were younger. You looked over and saw an ice cream stand, immediately grabbing his hand and running over there to look at the selection. Before you could even grab your wallet and tell the worker what you wanted, Jae had already ordered your favorite flavor along with his own cone as he took his wallet out. You looked over to him smiling because he remembered your favorite, ”Thank you, Baby. you know I wasn’t expecting you to pay?” you tell him, before giving him a kiss on the cheek. He smiles over to you and nods, ”I know, but I still wanted to pay.” You chuckle then look down at his wallet and see in one of the clear sleeves a polaroid of the both of you. You had taken that picture on your first anniversary; you were both on the couch and he had his arms around you, and he was kissing your cheek. ”You keep that photo of us in your wallet?” you asked after he put his wallet in his pocket,  the both of you grabbing your cones and walking down the path in the park. He quickly pulled his wallet back out and opened it to reveal the picture, he smiled so lovingly as he looked at the picture and remembered that day. ”Yeah, it’s my favorite picture of us.” ”Oh yeah, why’s that?” ”It’s the day I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you,” he softly said, looking over to you. You stopped at his confession, looking up at him and smiling, ”I love you so much, Jae,” you begin as you lean up and kiss him, ”You’re a damn cheesy,” you finish before slightly smearing your cone on his nose. He gasps and begins laughing, ”Oh, you’re so done for!”

 Young K

What a gentleman

He randomly surprises you with flowers at work

He opens your car door for you

Actually, he opens every door for you

Even when you said he didn’t have to

But he just loves to do simple gestures like that

He always makes sure you’re taken care of

Especially when you’re sick

”Baby, I don’t want you to get sick!”

”I don't care, you need to be cared for! Now eat your soup and take your medicine.”

He’s very protective of you

But not in a toxic possessive way

You’re just his baby, you know?

He wants to make sure you don’t get hurt

Another one who’s very playful

Although, not so much in bed

He’s dominant and never lets you top

But jesus, is he so fucking great

He’ll have you crying in pleasure within 2 minutes

And that’s just when he uses his fingers

Don’t be a brat to this man cause oh boy

You’ll get punished with spankings, overstimulation, and orgasm denial

He won’t stop until you’re begging

But if you aren’t a brat

Look forward to praising and getting rewarded with what you want

 Brian had taken you out on a picnic in an area that was very secluded and breathtaking, you laid in his arms, both overlooking the shallow river in front of you. Brian played with your hair as he hummed ’Fly Me to The Moon’ by Frank Sinatra, it was a scene out of a romance movie.  ”The water looks so refreshing,” you stated, glancing up at him. He smiles then gets up and pulls you up with him ”Let’s go see how ’refreshing it is.” You giggle and run to the river with him, the cool water came up to your knees and you smirked at Brian and splashed him, he gives you a shocked look and returns the smirk ”Oh, you're gonna get it.” You both have a splash battle, your laughs erupting into the area around you. It ends with you jumping into his arms, he deeply kisses you then walks back to the picnic blanket and you both lay down with him on top of you. One thing leads to another and you’re both making love as the sunsets and twilight appears, a million stars shining on you both.

Wonpil

Absolutely soft for you

Loves kissing you so much

And just touching you

You have movie nights together 

He can be such a romantic cliche 

But you love it 

He randomly surprises you with flowers 

”I saw them, and I thought of you!”

He has big heart eyes for you

You could be doing a mundane task and he's just leaning on the wall watching you with a smile

Sometimes when you bend over while he's watching

His heart eyes turn to lust 

And depending on whether he's in his dom or sub headspace

He either pushes you over the nearest surface and then fucks you until you're screaming

Or comes up behind you and whines for you to touch him while pressing his bulge against you

If he's in his dom headspace and you want your way

Start softly begging for him and then take his fingers and suck on them

He will give you exactly what you want 

His sub headspace is so sfusud

If you're sitting down, he will get on his knees

Place kisses up your legs and tell you how much he needs you

 You woke up and immediately called the dream you were having; it was a wet dream. The heat between your thighs was unbearable, you look over and see the Wonpil was still asleep, you sighed and decided to not wake him up, assuming he was exhausted after the previous night you had together. You slip your hand under your panties and begin rubbing your clit, your other hand covers your mouth to muffle the sounds trying to escape you. Just as you're about to push two fingers in, Wonpil’s voice fills the room ”What are you doing, Angel?” You halt your movements and widen your eyes, you begin to stutter while trying to find the words, his smirk is devilish as he hovers over you. ”I-I wasn't doing anything- I was j-” ”Don’t act so innocent, you had me pinned underneath you just last night,” He purrs into your ear, you crumble and start roaming your hands his body. ”Baby, I need you so much. Please touch me.” He leans down and places a kiss on your lips before replacing your hand in your panties with his own. 

 Dowoon

Another soft boy

He worships the ground you walk on

Makes sure you know how much he loves you everday

Ngl he is a little awkward at first in your relationship

But when he gets comfortable it’s amazing

You both have so much fun together

He tries to teach you how to play the drums

So patient with you and makes sure you don’t feel bad if you mess up

“Oops, not that one, Baby, you’re gonna hit the crash symbal not the hi-hat symbal. That’s okay though, I did that too when I was first learning! It took me forever to learn this part in this song.”

He’s always holding your hand

Anytime you ask him to help you with something he feels so happy

He loves it when you need him

And he loves it when you need him

When you need him, he feels so powerful and dominant

He’s definitely not a Hard Dom, he is sooo soft

He loves teasing you though

But when he is his usual submissive self

He is so pretty when he begs for you to fuck him

You caught him masturbating once and nearly fell apart when you heard him moaning your name

And you practically caved in when he looked up at you and pleaded for you to touch him

It was 2 A.M when you woke up to a call from Dowoon, he was on tour in a different country and even though it was only one more week until he was home, he was missing you a great deal. You groggily answer the phone, ”Hello?” ”Oh no, did I wake you up?” he asked, sounding a bit upset. You crack a small smile and reassuring him it's okay, besides you didn't have anything to do the next day, why not stay up all night talking to Dowoon? You both talk about each other's day, what was new and how his tour was going. There a small pause in the conversation before Dowoon speaks ”God...The things I would do just to see your face right now.” ”I know, Baby, I miss you so much right now.” ”One more week and then I'm cuddling you until the world ends.” You chuckle at his words, the both of you continue to talk until you end up falling asleep on the phone with him. Before Dowoon hung up, he said ”I love you so much, Baby, I'll see you when I get home.

[cvastals]

look i kno i said i wasnt gna bring a 6th until i was caught up w replies bt i kno gunner well n therefore felt like he deserved his time to shine in the rp so i beg of u pls plot w him looks at u all like :B

* axel auriant, cis man + he/him | you know gunner paxton, right? they’re twenty-two, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, four years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to bizarre love triangle by new order like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole curling up for days in bed wearing a hello kitty comfort shirt, stuttering in the face of affection, and hand me downs two sizes too big thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is july 31st, so they’re a leo, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( bri, 23, est, they/them )

background.

middle child of the paxton family, cliff being the eldest and wyatt being the youngest :D

they lived at the top of a hill in a trailer in a trailer park neighbourhood in laramie, wyoming so to say the least that fucking sucked for everyone involved

the trailer was so small that all 3 boys ended up sharing a room, gunner and wyatt sharing a bunk bed bc they cldnt fit 3 beds into one room it really was every childs nightmare bt they quickly grew used to it tbh

gunner was always more of an artsy child than invested in sports - though he does enjoy baseball and continued even to this day after their dad made him join SOMETHING in middle school - so he never rly earned their father’s respect, but he was always close with his mom since they had the same calm temperament

(depression/anxiety tw) he also gained a list of mental health issues that their mom had as well, including social anxiety and major depressive disorder

(violence/abuse tw) their father always encouraged pretty volatile behaviour and it caused a lot of physical fights and arguments between the brothers when their dad told them the best way to get over it was to start hurting until someone tapped out, it was just a chaotic and pretty abusive household but no one knew and their mom definitely wasn’t going to say anything about it to their dad

(missing child/kidnapping/anxiety/depression tw)  wyatt went missing on a weekend that their parents were gone because of a trip they won, and things just got worse from there, high school was really rough for gunner, his anxiety grew worse as time went on that no one found wyatt, their dad grew more hostile towards them, cliff left home in the middle of the night never to be seen again (merely leaving a note so that the family didn’t think they had a case of two kidnapped children), and their mom just grew sicker, it was rare that she would ever leave her room and if she did it was in fits of random energy where she would do something spontaneous and completely unnecessary to their house as a way of coping

the two years that gunner was at home after cliff left were pretty brutal and as soon as he could, he was fleeing wyoming and going to school in irving

(internalized homophobia tw)  things are far better now that he’s out of his home situation, but ofc he still has a few personal things he’s working thru; the paxton’s were raised in an incredibly religious household, and he’s got some classic Catholic Guilt going on upon realizing that he’s not jst attracted to women n he avoided talking abt it forever/stayed in the closet fr far too long bt he’s sort of come out now in his own way even tho he does still get a bit nervous talking abt it rly

he’s also ‘dealing’ rn (just pharmaceuticals) which is frankly funny to think abt bc this man is abt as threatening as a care bear bt money is tight all things considering and a librarian job doesn’t rly cover it, and with the amount of meds he’s on, plus incredibly frequent doctor’s visits, needing to pay for extra epi-pens, inhalers, etcs. bills add up so he’s cutting back his meds n selling wht he can spare which is . so unhealthy bt thts life in corporate america baybee!

details.

is literally allergic to everything. grass, cats, most fruits, milk, most nuts, bees, latex, probably more i cnt even keep up w them its pathetic

u can catch him strutting around town w his blinged out epipen holder (aka blinged out w pins of his fav horrors movies) LKSHDGKLHSKLDG

if things cldnt get worse he also has quite intense asthma so he carries an inhaler with him at all times

n to make matters even WORSE he frequently has dizzy spells n bad memory problems bc of all the concussions he’s suffered from (about 8-9 at this point) as well as consistent migraines that can b literally debilitating sometimes

awkward n jst a bit of a Weirdo to b frank like he barely knows how to converse with ppl

didnt have any friends in high school so took the time to teach himself rly weird things, knows a fuck ton of magic tricks, can yodel, juggle, solve a rubix cube with his eyes closed in under 30 seconds, just extremely weird and specific things

can honestly b a bit mean/barbaric to ppl he’s not close w/doesn’t kno - has told ppl to their face before he doesn’t enjoy talking to them bc he has no concept of social constructs/norms

loves 2 film random things at parties, makes him feel more comfortable at them n he makes short films of them all after

going off that fact he did a film internship in nyc during the summer and is trying to find a job in that field

doesn’t realize demisexuality is a thing so he’s never been that fond of sex but has this stigma in his mind that that makes him Broken so he still Tries n it jst doesnt go well tugs my shirt collar

connections.

ppl who r more into under the counter meds than Hard Drugs n buy off him?? probs wld have to kno him some way hes too scared to sell to Random randoms

ppl he went to school w? :D

some friends………. hes awkward bt he means well…………

ppl he has a crush on/unrequited crushes either way wtvr floats ur boat he crushes quite easily but never does anything abt it fr the most part

a mans he wld Risk It All fr (aka a guy tht he actually has a crush on n is Extra Awkward probs a lil mean to bc hes still New to That)

some enemies tbh, he has a temper n he tends to blow up rarely bt it happens n when it does it actually can b quite scary JKSHDGLHSDG

a muse….. mayhaps?? someone he always wants in his film projects

awkward past hook ups/one night stands where one of them cut ties off cuz every time they got together gunner acted like he was embalming a body for a funeral

current hook ups/fwb’s w ppl he’s actually close w/is comfortable w so its nowhere near as bad SDKHSLDGHKLSDGH

Anything u Desire

[heistmaster69]

pariet lilium (2)

pariet lilium

pariet lilium by @heistmaster69 chapter two

A/N: ive accepted that nobody will ever read this and im chill with that but if you do read this let me know pls ALSO TO MY FIRST FOLLOWER/MUTUAL @fanficflaneuse THANK YOU SO MUCH this is dedicated to you love! 

a chill 1.5k words

chapter one

~

“Sorry, Reed. They told me to.”

Frankie’s eyes jolted open. She felt afraid, alone. Her face was stiff and her eyes were full of tears. They ached, as did her chest. She sat up steadily and leaned against her bed frame, wiping a few stray tears with her sleeves. She grasped at her sternum, trying to ease what felt like a fifty-pound weight crushing her lungs. The tears were still falling, she had a lump in her throat, and she was coated in a sticky layer of sweat. It felt like the air in the dormitories was thick with dust. 

Frankie pushed her blankets aside and brushed her dark hair out of her face. A gentle light from the common room illuminated the room enough so she could see, so she stepped down, feeling the cold stone on her feet as she walked to the bathroom. The squeak of the faucet and the cold water dripping down her face didn’t do much to ease her. She needed a hug, and she wanted one from him.  Frankie pulled her quilt off of the bed and walked down to the common room to find some calm in a cup of coffee and the fire. After getting her mug, she heard a voice.

“Chess.” Draco sighed. His nickname for her. He sat in an armchair, blonde hair a mess, bags under his eyes with and a strange kind of emotion swimming within them.

“Merlin, did you sleep?” Frankie stepped toward the armchair, moving to stand in front of him. He couldn’t look at her. “Draco?”

He shook his head.

“Was it him again?” She sat on the rug in front of him, resting her forearms on his knees. 

“I could ask you the same question.” He met her gaze and she saw what was in his eyes. Fear. 

It’s no lie that Lucius Malfoy was a Death Eater. The most loyal of them all. After what happened in the Chamber of Secrets last year, Draco’s nightmares had been full of him. His father returning to the Dark Lord and pulling Draco down alongside him. Frankie’s dreams were daisies compared to the thunderstorms of Draco’s, but he understood her. They understood each other.

“Yeah.” She looked away. “I just feel stupid. I should’ve known or something.”

Draco moved her face to meet his eyes, bringing his hand up to wipe away one of her tears. “What he did to you was a right awful move, Frankie. You didn’t deserve it.” Draco grabbed her coffee and took a swig like it was firewhiskey.

“He thought so.” She scoffed. “I can’t even say his name, let alone hear it. It’s such a stupid thing to be messed up about-I’m sorry, are you even alright?”

The two sat in silence for a minute, a few minutes.

“He’s trying to come back, Chess.” His voice broke. “I’m terrified.”  He sounded so scared and it broke her heart. 

In one fell swoop, Draco pulled Frankie off the floor and onto him. She immediately hugged him. She needed this as much as he did. As she felt his cries, she began to break into strangled sobs.

They sat there, holding each other, until the sun began to rise.

~

No one should have to take Divination this early in the morning. Trelawney babbled on about tea leaves and how they show the future, when really, all Frankie saw in Theo’s teacup was a blob.

“Franks-”

“What is it with you boys and saying everything but my name?” Frankie, Francesca, Chess, and now Frank. “It’s only a little funny.”

“Not my problem, Frank, but what is my problem is these tea leaves. I’m seeing something very exciting-Blaise- come take a look at this!” Blaise turned from his table with Draco, peering into Theo’s teacup. 

“Woah, Francesca!” He exclaimed, nudging Draco to take a look as well, but he must’ve missed the joke, because he just looked confused. 

Theo showed her the leaves, it looked like two-oh.

“Well it looks like your prophecy’s come true, Frankster.” He smirked.

“Go on, Theodore.” She laughed.

“Well here, you see, it says that you have some massive knockers!” Blaise, Theo, Crabbe, Goyle and most of the boys in the near vicinity burst in to laughter, Frankie with them, shaking her head. 

“Shove off, Zabini.” Cher laughed. Pansy and Daphne began throwing crumpled up sheets of paper at the boys. 

Frankie noticed that Draco snuck a glance.

Daphne piped up. “Cher, don’t worry, Theodore can’t help it. He wants you too bad.” The boys led a chorus of oohs, shoving him and snickering.

Frankie couldn’t stop herself from seeing how Draco reacted.

He didn’t.

~

Frankie day in the library, sitting in between to rows of books. She was piling up a stack of books on spells, spell creation, and the Unforgivables when she saw a blur of bright blonde hair.

“Malfoy? Malfoy-”

He interrupted. “I’m sorry about the boys, earlier.”

Frankie rolled her eyes. “If you actually cared about me you would know that I didn’t give a single-”

“-I care about you Chess-where the hell is this coming from?” He walked up to her and leaned against the stacks.

Salazar, did I say that out loud? “I was only joking, dimwit.”

"If this is about last night-" He started.

"What about last night?" Frankie's heart rate began to accelerate.

"Nothing-I-It just happens often, not that I mind, Merlin I do not mind, but I was just hoping that I didn't make you uncomfortable or anything." He is so cute. Wait-no, no he's not.

"You didn't, I was thinking the same thing, actually." She let out s quiet giggle, not seeing the blush that crept up his neck.

"How would you make me uncomfortable?"

"I don't know. I must've been crushing you or something. Plus I'm definitely not on the top of anyone's list of People They'd Want To Cuddle. Most people just see me as the fat girl who no one would want to shag."

"Who wouldn't want to shag-" He coughed, praying that she didn't hear that. "I mean, you were definitely not crushing me, and Chess, cuddling you was a very nice experience."

Frankie chuckled to herself, turning back to her book. "Thanks, Malfoy."

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” He sat down across from her. “What are you reading?”

“About the Killing Curse.” She didn’t look up from the book, but she wasn’t focusing on the words anyway.

“Merlin, Chess. How wonderful.” They shared a laugh.

“Do you know what a Horcrux is, Malfoy?” Frankie looked up, pointing at a picture on the tattered pieces.

“Well it sounds lovely. What is it?”

“It’s disgusting. When you use the killing curse, you break your soul, and it can sort of create immortality, in a twisted way.”

“Immortality? So by using the curse, you save your soul to live another, well, someone else’s lifetime.”

“That’s the point. It’s really creepy.” Frankie tossed the book to him.

“It says here that Herpo the Foul used them to-bloody hell that’s disgusting!” He tossed the book back to her with a grimace.

“A Horcrux can be created by anyone who commits murder, if they want to.”

“I wonder if You-Know-Who made those.” Draco wondered. “I mean, my father told me stories that would make your skin crawl, and he was always blabbing about immortality and being invincible-” His face fell.

“Malfoy, do you think-”

“No,”

No.

“Oh my god, Malfoy. Oh my god.” Frankie threw the book and scrambled to her feet as Draco did as well. “Bloody, god, Merlin, oh my god!”

He was panting heavily, Frankie grabbed fistfuls of her hair, feeling nauseated.

“I think I’m gonna be sick, Chess, Merlin.”

“He-” She looked him dead in the eye. “He did that, didn’t he?” 

“Bloody hell Chess, Salazar-” He stared into her soul, and reached to grab her sleeve. “We’ve got to tell Snape.”

~

“And why, might I ask, were you researching Horcruxes to begin with, Miss Reed?”

“Professor, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you-” Frankie panted, still freaking out.

“Why is it important? What’s important is that the Dark-I mean You-Know-Who is still alive.” Draco shouted. 

“Malfoy, It’s fine. Professor I believe there is a way to reverse the effects of the Killing Curse, and Horcruxes are the key to figuring it out. It’s a strange loophole, I guess.” Frankie sat down next to Draco.

Professor Snape scoffed, but the two could tell that there was a strange gleam in his eye. “There is no cure for the Killing Curse-”

“It’s not a cure, Snape. It would separate the soul of the dead with the piece of the soul of the killer and return it to the dead’s body somehow I just haven’t figured out-you know what-I’m not an idiot, I’ve been studying this for my entire life-”

“He Who Must Not Be Named has not returned, Francesca. Ten points from each of you for wasting my time with your childish nonsense and being out after curfew.” He stood up and went into his quarters with a flourish of his robe. 

Frankie hadn’t even realized that Draco had been holding her hand the entire time.

~

A/N: okay so i know that this isn’t as long as the last one, but i felt it was a good place to stop. I’m going ultimate slowburn slow with this fic lol. pls let me know what u think ! love you all ! mwah.

[isnt-that-something]

Just in time for Djinner

A portal opened up where a stranger came out of. His clothes were dirty and tattered, his torso showing a little. As soon as the portal closed, he staggered forward and gave in to collapsing on the ground.

Shakko had been raking the sands of the Shrines stone garden when the stranger appeared. “Woah!” The young kitsune frowned approaching the stranger cautiously. “You uh… you alright?” he gently nudged their form with the tip of his rake.

The man gave no response. He seemed to have fainted. His shirt ridden up to see nasty burnt scars in different sizes.

Shakko grimaced. “Hooo boy…. KIIIIIIIIIIT!” he called into the main house. “No Shakko, you’re not done yet! Just like you weren’t done 10 minutes ago or the 10 minutes before that or before that!” Kit called back sounding frustrated before she poked her head out of the house. Her eyes got huge seeing the injured stranger. “What in the world?!” she strode over quickly pulling Shakko behind her. She bent over the stranger leery. “Where did he come from?” her eyes darted to the wards that encircled the Shrines perimeter.  “I don’t know. He popped outta a portal. Figured you had ta know him!” Shakko said defensively. “Well that explains how he got past the wards.” Kit muttered quietly. “Go inside and get some Sea Tea, I’ll see if I can wake him up.” As Shakko ran to follow her instructions Kit gingerly inspected man.

The man had silver white hair with a deep blue stripe. His skin was a bright tan with slightly skinny yet well built muscles. His back however had his skin darkened and ruined. There were scabs littered around; there were some small burnt scratches, and some terrifyingly big that looked like they were caused by a burning whip.

“I definitely don’t recognize you…” Kit muttered brushing her fingers against him gently as she took stock of his wounds which were worse than she thought. Shakko came running back with a container of sea tea. Kit frowned looking at the man on the ground. She sighed. “We can’t treat him out here… Sorry Shakko but take that back inside and go turn down my bed, stripe it to just the sheets and leave the tea on my bedside. I’ll bring him in.” 

Kit carefully rolled the stranger into her arms and stood with a ease belying her much smaller form. “Let Byakko know. And until we know if he’s a friend of foe I want us to be very cautious with him, understand?” She said sternly at Shakko who nodded briskly. He ran back inside and Kit followed after slowly so as to not jostle her new… guest. Mindful of his long limbs she carried him inside, making her way to her bed she softly set him down.

Kit propped up his head and slowly poured in a couple drops of sea tea. “I really need to learn healing magic…”

A groan came out of the man's lips, followed by mutters. "..n-no... Not again--mmmm...." He started to shift slightly, eyes squeezed shut and eyebrows furrowed.

“Shhh It’s alright. I got you.” Kit let a few more drops of Sea tea past his lips. Slowly his wounds were starting to heal.  He stilled from the touch of liquid but soon relaxed, slowly taking more of the drink, sweating a little. His eyes started to flutter open, revealing his dark dull blue eyes, focusing on the cup before him.

Kit tilted the cup a little more to allow the liquid to flow into his mouth a little freer. Silent she watched him closely, check both his actions and that his wounds continued to heal. The man continued to drink more until he finished every drop of it. Leaning back from the cup, he let out a breath and steadily breathed. He leaned with one elbow propped up as his other arm laid on his stomach. His eyes were closed; he was trying to rid off of the ache in his head and the black spots surrounding his view.

Kit eyed him and pulled out a couple monster candies from her bag. “Here, eat these. Would you like more tea?” she pressed the candy into his hand that lay across his stomach. He didn't notice his surroundings or even hear the woman beside him until something touched his hand. He snapped his eyes open to the candy in his hand and they soon landed on the kitsune.

Kit’s eyes widened at the sudden movement. She held up her hands to show she meant him no harm. “Easy now buddy. Let’s not do anything crazy, I’m trying to help.” her voice was low and calm.

He blinked; his eyes darted around the room all the while he held on the candy. Moments later he looked straight in the kitsune's eyes, expression weary. "Where am I..?"

“Currently in my bed.” she grinned cheekily before getting more serious. “This is my Shrine. Not exactly sure the name of my AU but this is my little part of the world. Apparently you popped out of a portal into my garden, so I’m assuming you’re from a different world.” She leaned back in her chair. “I’m Kit by the way. Who exactly are you, where did you come from, and how did you end up here?” she tilted her head in askance, ears twitching. His face fell from the questions; he looked down to his lap. “I..I don’t…remember….” His fingers slowly clenched around the candy as his other hand clenched the mattress.

Kit’s eyebrows rose, well that’s a problem…. “Oh dear… it could be the shock from your injuries.” she ventured slowly not 100% believing he didn’t remember anything as she recalled his pleas for ‘not again’ when he was semiconscious. Gesturing at his hand, “You should eat that, it’ll help heal you. Until you do remember what do you want me to call you?” He glanced at the candy, slowly unwrapping it all the while he was deep in thought. He was trying to remember who he was and what happened to him. The nightmare he just had wasn't just that, it felt REAL. He paused and let out a sound. "Sss...s-se--.... C..."

“Cee?” Kit tilted her head wondering if she’d misheard him. “As in… C?” she signed the letter.

"Y-yeah... At least," he looked up at Kit, "that's what I think my name starts with..." It was true. While he kept thinking of a name, his mind kept going on and on with C, whether it was a letter or not, it felt familiar to him, so he went with it.

Kit shrugged “Works for me. It’s nice to meet you C.” she said kindly.

“As I said before I’m Kit. There are two other kitsunes that live here, Byakko and Shakko, as well as my Bitty Misty. You’re welcome to stay here until we can get you back on your feet and figure out more about your past.” as she spoke she poured him another cup of sea tea.

“Fair warning though C, if you attempt to hurt me or mine I will not hesitate to return you back to how I found you. Understand?” her voice held a calm but firm bite to it. 

C gave a stiff nod, taking note of her warning. "Nice to meet you too, Kit..." He then finally ate the candy. He scooted up to sit and gave out a grunt from how sore his body felt.

Kit frowned putting a light hand on his shoulder. “The monster candy should have healed the worst of everything but you may still have some injuries. It looked pretty bad. Here.” she gave him the tea and helped him sit up easier, putting several pillows behind his back for support.

“I’m sorry… I don’t know much healing magic. Kitsunes are pretty sturdy and don’t really need it so I never bothered to learn.” she apologized. “Until recently I didn’t have a need to heal others either.”

C peeked at Kit from the corner of his eyes while shifting. “I-It’s fine,” he assured, “I’m sure it’ll heal soon.” He gratefully took the tea, giving a small thanks to Kit in the process. He drank the tea and sighed in relief. He then asked, “how..bad exactly did my injuries looked?”

“I’ll be frank with you C, they looked pretty rough. A lot of burns as well as some deep cuts.” Kit grimaced remembering the injuries.  “It seems like the tea and candy is helping some. I’ll check on them again later if you’d like.” as she made the offer a pair of golden fox eyes peered from the shadows of the room. “Until then,” she said pointedly “Shakko can get us something from the kitchen. Coffee for me please dear.”  A red fox emerged and in a cloud of smoke shifted to his Kitsune form looking abashed at being caught. “Heh… sure Kit.” he turned to C. “Would ya like anything? We got tons of snacks if you’re hungry.” he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

C’s eyes widened in worry. Burns and deep cuts!? Surely they must be connected to the nightmare he had, if he’d even call it as such. Hearing the offer, he gave the boy a hesitant smile. “Just some..biscuits, pls.”

Shakko nodded and he ran off. You could hear two voices whispering as he clanked around the kitchen. Kit stared at C intently. She crossed her arms before lifting a fist to prop her chin on as she contemplated him.

C watched him run off then caught Kit watching him. It was only a few seconds and he felt uncomfortable by her gaze. Looking away, he scratched his neck only to feel something metal. His face fell as he felt more of the metal around his neck; it felt a bit tight, like a choker.

Kit shook herself from her thoughts and looked at C in concern. “Are you alright?” noticing where his hands touch she saw the glint of something around neck. Kit gently removed his hand to look at whatever it was. “What is this?: she mummered fingers brushing against it and his neck lightly.

C tried to refrain himself but he couldn’t help but shudder not just due to the touch but how cold the choker felt around his neck. It looked tight, however it had a little gap to give the neck little freedom. Its color, bright silver. It didn’t look thick, but neither did it look entirely like an accessory. Everyone would almost mistake it for those prison chains, but it didn’t look too harmful, yet…it had no lock for release or take off. C tugged at it, brows furrowed from how sturdy it felt despite it’s weak appearance.

Kit shuddered at the collar. She stopped his fingers from prying at it. “Don’t hurt yourself. When your more healed we’ll look at it again. How are you feeling?” There was another clatter from the kitchen and two voices rose momentarily in a whisper fight before quieting back down to more shuffling noises.

He huffed and instead caressed the metal in a back and forth manner. “I’m fine,” C quipped, “this thing’s just making me feel itchy is all.” His looked down at his neck, face morphed to irritation at the tiny glint he saw from the corner of his eye.

Kit looked at him in sympathy. Just looking at it made her itch as well. Kitsunes didn’t like the sensation of being trapped or restricted. She opened her mouth to speak when Shakko burst back into the room carrying a large platter overloaded with food. On his back clung a small white hair Kitsune girl holding a cup of coffee. “M’kay, so me and Byakko couldn’t agree on what type of ‘biscuits’ ya wanted since there are so many different types and people use the same word but mean different things. Soooo we got some of each.” he declared proudly presenting C with an array of ‘biscuits’, from savory fluffy biscuits to crackers to a large assortment of cookies. The little Kitsune jumped down and handed Kit the coffee, flicking her eyes at the stranger before squeaking and pressing her face to Kit’s lap shyly. Kit pat her head with one hand while sipping her coffee. “C this is Byakko.”

C stared incredulously at the biscuit-filled platter presented to him. He could've sworn he almost felt himself faint at the sight, but he was too shocked for his body to function on its own instinct. Noticing a very young kitsune, he watched her offer the coffee and received it gratefully. He let out a breath of laughter at her shy behavior. "Hello there, Byakko." He gave a small wave to her.

Byakko squeaked but raised a shaking hand in a tiny wave. “H-hello.” Shakko set the platter on a free spot on the bed. Kit raised a eyebrow and looked at Byakko plastered against her. “Come on Bya.” he picked up the little Kitsune, “Ya can help me finish raking the garden. Give a yell if ya need anything else.” he gave the other two a cocky smile and wave as he left the room.

Kit smiled at C, “Sorry about that. Byakko gets nervous around new people. She just needs a minute to get used to you.” she frowned concerned. “How are you feeling?”

C smiled at the two as they left. He glanced at Kit and answered, "ermm..feeling comfortable, too comfortable actually." He rubbed the nape of his neck just above the metal. "I'm quite..e-embarrassed about all of this," he gestured to the things the kitsunes have given and done for him, "and I don't have anything to offer in return." He had his hand slid to the side of his face, his eyes looked down on the floor and his mouth thinned.

A smile curved Kit’s lips and she leaned forward to pat the top of his head. “Hey don’t worry about it. We’re not helping you expecting repayment. I happen to be a bit of a natural worrywart and mother hen.” she winked and leaned back. “Besides, I would hope that if something happened to me or mine that we would experience the same by others. So if nothing else you can try to pass it forward one day to someone in need.”

C's face warmed from her pat and her words. He soon smiled in return and exhaled in ease. "Alright, Miss Kit." He leaned back, resting on the pillows. He reached out, grabbed a biscuit, took a bite of it and relished in the flaky treat.

“Just Kit is fine.” she laughed with a blush grabbing a cookie. They sat for a moment before there was movement around the hair around her neck. Out popped a little skeletal Bitty with golden eyes, having snuck into the room and climbed up the back of Kit’s chair. 

Kit giggled and nuzzled him. “Hello Misty. Would you like a snack sunshine?” “Yes please, mama!” he piped up reaching for a mango sugar cookie piece that Kit handed to him. He waved at C as he chewed. “Hello! You scared mama and the other two. Hope you’re feeling better.” he sat on Kit’s shoulder lightly kicking his feet.

C paused and stared at the bitty and soon gave a small smirk with a raised brow. "Alright, Misty, I'll be sure to get better soon so I don't spook everyone," he nodded his head towards Kit, "especially your mama here."

Kit snickered and shook her head. Misty quickly shoved the rest of his cookie into his mouth finishing it before leaping from Kit’s shoulder to her lap then made the jump to the bed. He put his hands to his hips “You better get better for you too!” he declared. “So you really don’t remember who you are or nothing? Have you checked your pockets? That’s where humans keep their stuff right mama?” He looked at Kit before looking back at C curiously “You are human right? You look human.”  Now that they mention it… C stared at his hands in wonder. ‘Human…’ The name felt…foreign. He IS human, but something’s telling him that he..wasn’t? The more he thought about it, the clearer the voice in his head chanted. ’hUMaN…..’ “I…” He hesitantly spoke, “I guess I am.” 'For now…’ He thought as he reached for his pockets.

Poking his hand in them, he found them to be…ripped; they had holes. “Hmmm, sorry little bud, but I don’t have anything in my pockets,” he then pointed at the choker, “unlike this damned thing on my neck.” Right now, the only clues he had were the so-called nightmare that could be connected to his injuries and this choker.

“Hmmmmm…” the bitty sat cross legged on the bed looking up at C. Kit perked up curiously “Nothing at all? Huh…” she tapped a finger to her lips. “Misty, be a dear and go have Shakko investigate where C popped in at. He may have dropped something there. Maybe whatever opened a portal to here?” Misty nodded and jumped up from his position “Ok Mama!” and he dashed off the bed and out the door. Kit looked up at C “Sorry about that. It is curious though. I’m wondering how you got here. If we can find whatever device or magic brought you here we should be able more about you. Hopefully they’ll find some.” She stood up and set aside her cup. “If you’re feeling up to it why don’t you let me check your wounds? I want to make sure you’re healing up ok.”

He nodded, adjusting himself so Kit can check on his back that were previously injured. Thanks to the tea he drank, his back was clear from scabs and blood, yet they left scars on his back. Nonetheless, they seemed to be healed enough for C to stand straight.

Kit frowned concerned. Normally the magic in the sea tea and candies would heal something completely. The only things she could think of was some of the scars were older than she thought, the injuries were far more grave than she’d originally thought, or they were inflicted by magic making them unable to heal fully. “Well, it looks at though it’s healed up decent enough for you to get up at least.”

 She looked at the dirt and tears over his clothes. “Would you like to get cleaned up? I should be able to get you some new clothes if you’d like.”

"Yes please." C accepted politely. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed; his slightly torn up shirt hanging from his body. He had his hands on the edge for leverage, and he released a breath. "I feel like I haven't had a bath for a long time." His legs shifted from the movement of his feet, checking if his ankles and calves weren't broken or having cramps.

Kit stood in front of him offering her arm. “Well we can’t have that. Here let me help you.” “Oh, no need,” he declined as he started to stand, “I can stand just–” His legs wobbled, making him lose his balance. He grabbed Kit’s arm in the process, C then laughed nervously. “Ermm…maybe just for today, hehe.”

“Heh, no worries. Let me know when you’re ready to move and we’ll make our way over to the bathroom.” Kit smiled, pointing at the attached bathroom door.

C nodded and began to steadily stand up straight. Shakily, he tried lifting one of his legs up slightly, curled his toes and rolled the ankle around to calm himself down. After doing so with his other leg, he gave Kit the approval. "My legs are up and kickin', heh," he joked a bit, "we can go now."

Kit nodded, keeping her arm steady under his she slowly lead them to the bath. “I normally soak in my hot springs so there’s only a shower in here, but it has a ledge in it that you can sit on if you need to.” she guided him to rest against the sink counter. Across the way and on the wall next to shower there was a small cabinet that was open and appeared empty.

“You can get what you’ll need for the shower here, as well as new clothes. All you have to do is think about what you need and-” Kit shut the door and rapped her knuckled against it twice reopening it to show a couple fluffy towels. “tada!”  She pulled out the towels and set them on the counter. “Be as specific as you can when you’re thinking about what you want, especially for the clothes or the house will default to something a little more ‘traditional’ and you’ll end up in something like Shakko’s.” Kit smiled referencing Shakko’s matching coat and short happi set. “Give it a try.” she gestured towards the cabinet.

"Oh wow..." He marvelled at the presentation Kit did with the magic cabinet. He gave it a try and closed it. He thought of one thing in particular and began tapping the door twice. When he opened, a shampoo was what appeared in it. C hummed, amused as he took the shampoo.

“Good job. Go ahead and finish getting what you need, I don’t think the cabinet will work once I’m out of the room.” Kit hopped up on the sink ledge and kicked her legs smiling. C gave out a small grunt of acknowledgement and closed the door again. A few minutes later, he already has everything he needs. He trudged over to the ledge, setting the items down with a grin. He couldn't help but feel giddy with the sight of bathing products.

Kit smiled at his excitement. “Alright, shower controls are here and pretty easy to work.” she showed him how to change the water temperature and pressure.  “I’ll be in my room so just give a shout if you need anything. And there’s no rush, take your time.” she threw a wave over her shoulder as she walked out and closed the door.

“Ok..!” As soon as Kit left, he started taking off his clothes, putting them on one area. He got under the shower and turned it on. He sighed at the contact on his skin and ran his hands through his hair. While he bathed himself, his mind ran many questions. Who was he? What was he even? What happened? Why is he here? Where did he come from? None were answered, and all he knew was just his name, the wounds, the ni– memory…and the choker. The more he thought about these, his eyes started to flicker its color, from dark blue to indigo. He feels…odd. C shook his head and furrowed his brows and went on with rubbing his skin with soap. Few minutes later, he got out of the bathroom while rubbing his hair with a small towel to dry. He wore a long sleeved button down polo shirt with denim pants and a pair of brown leather shoes.

When he came out of the bathroom Kit had been in the process of finishing putting new sheets on her bed and remaking it. She gathered up the dirtied sheets and smiled at him “Hey! You look better. Are you feeling better C?”

"I'm feeling..swell and refreshed." C blew out an air of relief. He then peered over Kit and said, "I...wanna thank you for bringing me in and treatin' me back to health," he rubbed his hair behind, "ya..didn't have to give so much though, hehe, especially to a stranger like me."

“Heh, told you not to sweat it. It’s not in my nature to leave someone hurting like that if I can help.” Kit walked past him reaching out and scruffling his hair laughing. “Come on follow me.” she lead him back to the main part of the house chucking the sheets into a laundry room as they walked. Through the windows outside they could see the two kitsunes and the bitty scouring the ground for any clues, though so far they seemed to have found nothing. “Do you want some real food? Or more Sea Tea?” Kit asked as she walked to the kitchen/dining room.

Watching the three as they passed, C was sad to know that there may be nothing dropped from him left outside. C's eyebrows rose up when Kit mentioned food. He went up beside her and perked up in a normal tone with a grin, "yes pls, ma'am."

Shakko nearly tripped over Byakko looking up towards the trees while Misty held up a large stick triumphantly only to sag in disappointment when the other two shook their heads. He threw aside the stick and continued searching. At this point it looked more like a game than a serious search. Kit turned on her stove. “Would you like anything in particular? If not I’m thinking paella.” she froze and squinted at C. “Hmmmm I don’t suppose you know if you have any allergies do you?”

“Nnnnope, not really. I’m fine with just about anything…” He reassured and almost drooled at the thought of paella; he blinked and suddenly spoke up, “anything but cotton candy.” He blushed at this. “I-It’s no dish but– somehow I kinda..really don’t like it….” He looked down with his mouth shut in a thin line. He felt that that was unnecessary to tell.

“Noted. Lucky for you that’s not really something I make. Usually save that for festivals.” Kit winked at him digging out the ingredients for the paella. She seasoned the meats and set them aside to marinate while she prepped the rice. “But hey, look at that! You remembered something! It’s a start. Here give me a hand. Chop up this onion and garlic for me.” she set C up a station to work at. “You remember anything else?”

"That's about it for now." C said as he wiped up his hands a little and started to cut the garlic first. "I'm curious... There's only four of you in this household?"

Kit looked at him curiously stirring some oil into a pan. She smiled crookedly with a eyebrow raised “Is four not enough?” she laughed. “Why do you ask?”

"W-Well, your place is such a big house fit for more than four, and," he swallowed, paused himself from cutting and glanced away, "Ta be honest I almost thought you were a kid, l-like a young teen of s-sorts..!"

Kit burst out laughing. “Ahahahaha! N-no I, haha, I am no teen.” she had to pause a moment to catch her breath. Kit wiped a tear from her eye. “S-sorry. I wasn’t expecting you to say that.” she snickered a bit. “In Kitsune terms I am more or less a young adult, somewhere in the 20s or 30s for human years equivalent. But in terms of actual years I have been around much longer.” she smiled her four tails waving gently in amusement. “Kitsunes are more or less immortal. Very few things can kill us. Now those two out there.” she pointed out the window at the two Kitsunes outside sitting and talking to each other seriously. “They’re a little bit… different. I was born a Kitsune. They were recently changed into Kitsunes thanks to my shrines magic.” she shrugged. “They’re more the age they appear.”

C awed at her tails and the knowledge he got from Kit. He looked at the two and commented, "yet despite their ages, their behavior is no different than how they look. It has somethin' to do with the tails, right?"

“That’s part of it. Most of it for them is that they used to be foxes.” Kit stated going back to her pan starting to cook the meats. “But yes, the older a Kitsune is the more tails they are likely to have. Although,” she paused throwing a grin over her shoulder “we can hide our tails if we wish.” Her eyes flashed and for a moment Kit shifted to her ‘human’ form, then again to a Kitsune form but with only 2 tails, and one final time to her normal appearance.

C jumped from her shape shifting and held a priceless face. “Woah, that’s…that’s some incredible magic….”

“Heh, basic Kitsune tricks. But thank you just the same.” she smirked at his expression. She leaned over and snagged the chopped onions and garlic. “Thhhhank you!” and dumped them into the mix. Delicious smells of spices and meats filled the air.

C inhaled the aroma, his stomach grumbled silently yet it was still heard. He awkwardly smiled at Kit. "Eheh... D-do you need any other help or...?"

“Not at the moment. This is nearly done.” Kit’s eyes flicked outside. “If you want you can go get those three and tell them dinner is nearly done.”

"Alright." He briefly went for them outside. "Hey y'all's," C gently called out, "dinner's about to be finished and ready, let's go." He strode over to them and bent down a little to Misty. "Found nothin' huh..?"

Byakko and Shakko’s heads snapped up and they made their way to C. Byakko hiding slightly behind Shakko. Misty looked up at C frustrated. “Nothing!” he threw up his hands in frustration. He blinked up a C, “Oh you look better!” Byakko peeked behind Shakko’s legs and quietly piped up “A-are you feeling better?”  Shakko looked towards the house drooling. C smiled and answered, "Just fine and fresh, guys," he glanced at Misty, "and it's alright little fella. After all, I'm very slowly regainin' my memories back piece by piece." He saw Shakko and ruffled his hair a bit with a cheeky grin. "Hehe, well aren't you just excited."

“Nggggh!” Shakko shoved C’s hand off, hair sticking up comically. “Really dude?!” Byakko giggled behind her hands smiling up at C. Misty laughed with her. “Geeze come on. Let’s just go it.” Shakko said with a grin turning red before picking up Byakko and walking briskly back to the house. Misty took off like a shot through the grass, turning back to C waving him on. “Come on C!”

C laughed and ran shortly after them behind back to the house. He looked over the two kitsunes and asked curiously, "are you two related?"

They stopped just shy of the door. Byakko looked up at Shakko and hugged his neck. “Shakko… adopted me when my parents left the mountain.” she said sadly. Shakko nuzzled her, “Hee couldn’t leave ya all alone could I?” he looked up at C. “We don’t share the same parents but she’s my little sister.” Misty tugged at C’s pant leg “Let’s goooo! Mama’s waiting!” and he ran inside ahead of them.

"Ohh," he gave an apologetic smile, "sorry about that." He looked down at Misty. "Alright, alright, hehe." he stepped through the door along with Misty and called out. "We're here now!"

Shakko patted C on the back good naturedly.

As they walked in, Kit finished setting the table with one hand while texting someone with the other. She looked up at them, “Hey guys good timing! Paella is done. Grab a seat and I’ll bring over the pot.”

C held a strained smile from the sight. "Want me bring you up the table, Misty?" He offered.

“Naw I’m good!” Misty chirped darting forward scaling the furniture with ease. If one looked closely you’d see everything has perfect bitty size handholds for him to use to climb. “Thanks though!”

Kit came back carrying a large pot and carefully set it on the table with a grin that melted seeing C’s strained smile. “Everything ok C?” she looked at him concerned.

"My saliva's salivating." C turned his head to hide his reddened face. "I don't think I've ever seen a dish," he gestured to the food, "THAT good." He then held up his hands in defense. "I'm over exaggeratin', but I can't help it." He chuckled nervously. He feels...weird; the way he's acting seems to make him feel like....him. Was he a dramatic or something? He hopes not.

“Pffft! It’s alright to be excited over food. Goodness knows I’ve nearly lost my mind over food now and again.” Kit laughed and started serving out portions to the young ones before C and herself. 

“I thought you were upset over something there for a minute.” she said snagging a bite off her plate.

"Nah, I wasn't, don't worry." C took a bite and felt himself drown in pleasure from the taste of Paella. He commented, "ya know, you'd make a husband happy with your cooking," he glanced at Kit with an eyebrow raised and a playful smirk, "you'd make a great wife."

Kit snorted and turned a little pink. “Heh thanks. I’m glad you like it. And maybe one of these days.” she beamed.

Out in the multiverse, For sneezed.

C chuckled at Kit’s reaction and looked over the others. He feels grateful, but he can’t help but…lament at this. To say that he wasn’t worried was a lie; he IS worried, but…. He glanced at Kit with a calm expression despite the fear in his heart. “Hey Kit,” he spoke in a gentle tone, “with my memories steadily coming back, I’ll still be hanging around with you guys here, right?” He looked down at his food. “But,” he paused, hesitant to continue, “..what will happen once I regain my memories back? What if I won’t be the same as I am today..?”

The others around them were more focused on eating than the conversation, Kit froze food half way to her own mouth at C’s questions. She finished the bites journey and contemplated his words as she chewed. “Like I said before, you’re welcome to stay until we can get you back on your feet. As to what happens if and when you get your memories back… that’s up to you. Either we’ll help you get back home or if you do not wish to go back we can look into helping you find a new home.” she gestured with her fork. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” “As to not being the same… that depends on you. No matter what, what matters is who you are now not who you were.” she waved her hand. “Not that we shouldn’t try to learn who you were. But what I mean is if you find out you don’t like who you were you can always change who you want to be. I’ve known a couple people that didn’t have the best pasts. They had a lot to overcome, but they fought through it. They made some mistakes along the way, but they’ve learned from them.” she smiled thinking about Obscure and Kage and how far they’ve come. “Goodness knows they’re still rough around the edges, but they’re doing their best and I couldn’t be happier for them.” she smiled at C. She looked at him curiously again, “So your memories are coming back?”

He looked back at Kit with a small smile. "No, just had a funny feelin' is all." He contemplated on Kit's words, feeling his mind relieved and contradicted. He can change, but something within him is telling him the opposite. What was so important about his past anyways..?

Seeing his struggle Kit lightly flicked his forehead to break him out of his thoughts. “Better eat your food before it gets cold. Cold paella is sad paella.” she snickered as she patted his shoulder warmly.

In the living room, a portal opened.

Kit looked up in surprise at the portal. 

Fog walked through looking at some papers "darling I hope I'm not bothering you I-" when he looked up he flushed startled at the big crowd "oh goodness I'm so sorry I interrupted your meal"

Kit jumped up happily. “Starlight! Hello love.” she nearly tackled him in a hug, mindful of his papers. “Not interrupting a thing, you’re just in time for dinner. As you can see, I have company. Fog this is C, C this is my datemate Fog.” she squeezed Fog and quietly whispered to him. “C appeared through a portal out in my courtyard, very injured. He seems to have amnesia. I healed him up best I could, but he still hasn’t remembered… much.”

"Uhmm...hi....." C waved awkwardly at Fog with a crooked grin.

Fog hugged her back and listened carefully and then nodded kissing her head smiling “you have had quite the day it seems!” He turned to C smiling “my name is Fog, it’s nice to meet you. I’m no doctor, but I could check things over with you if you’d like, and I do know someone who is very good at fixing souls should you need it”

Kit leaned into Fog with a happy hum before looking at C. “It’s true, Fog is a excellent healer.”

"Nice to meet ya too! Erm, I ain't too sure about that..soul fixin', but I don't mind the help." Ce gave a grateful smile.

Fog chuckled "then I'll let you enjoy your meal and we can do a check up, is that alright?"

“Would you like a plate too dear? It turned out pretty good if I say so myself.” Kit smiled. The other two Kitsunes and Misty nodded enthusiastically mouths full. 

C nodded. "Better finish this before its gets cold. Besides, a cold paella's a sad paella." He quoted jokingly.

Fog tilted his head confused “what is a paella?”

Kit smiled and walked over to the pot getting Fog a small portion to try. “It’s a rice dish that has chicken, muscles, clams, shrimp and a whole lot of spices that make it extremely flavorful and warm but not super spicy. It’s good for large batches to feed a lot of people at once.” she smirked, “Seemed like a good idea today.”

Fog looked curious “I will try it, ah, is tumeric one of the spices?” He asked taking the small portion from her and trying it.

Kit shook her head. “Nope, but it does have saffron and paprika in it.” she watched his reaction curiously. “Is tumeric something I need to avoid using when cooking for you?”

Fogs eye lights became stars as he finished his bite and purred "it's good!" He turned to C "before I get too side tracked, can you tell me what things you do know for sure about your memory?"

C thought up at least everything he remembers about himself. "Well, my name goes with C, I don't think I was human before, I don't like cotton candy, and, from a nightmare I had, I prolly ran away, which explains this choker maybe." He consciously touched the metal.

Kit’s eyebrows snapped up in surprise. She’d had suspicions that C might not be human but she was surprised he admitted that he thought he might not be. Not to mention the little tidbit about a nightmare and running away from something. She looked up at Fog to see what he had to say on the matter. Shakko and Byakko looked at C in silent shock. Misty munched his food watching his parents reactions. Fog looked at the collar curiously "would you like to try to take that off?" He asked studying it.

"It has no lock, nothin'." C roamed his hand around it. "And it's tight too; I don't think taking it off would be easy..."

Kit winced looking at the collar again, hand unconsciously rubbing at her own neck.

Fog had a glint in his eyes as a mini blaster formed next to his head showing it could make a torch flame for slicing.

"Eh-- woah, WOAH! Wait a sec-! I'm not--" C stammered, flinching away from the blaster and sweated from the sudden appearance of fire. "I'm not ready yet..!!" He yelped out in fear.

“Woah easy C! It’s ok, Fog won’t hurt you.” Kit quickly blocked the blaster torch from view by putting her arm between them. She cast an apologetic look at Fog  “He had severe burns along his back.” she said quietly to explain his extreme reaction.

Fog made the blaster vanish "oh I'm terribly sorry! I got excited-that's no excuse I'm so sorry for scaring you." Fog backed up looking guilty. "I won't make another move without consent."

Kit pat Fog’s arm sympathetically. “So what do you want to do C?” 

C let out a breath. "Lemme..take some time about it." He hiccupped from the food he swallowed abruptly seconds ago. He raised up a hand to Fog and said, "you're alright now; I forgive ya. I'll tell you when I want to take it off."

Fog nodded quickly "of course!"

“How about we finish dinner?” Kit suggested the two youngest kitsunes had finished theirs and went to the kitchen to start cleaning up leaving the adults to talk. “C… If you don’t mind me asking. You mentioned a nightmare… and possibly not being human?”

"Possibly, I... Everything keeps coming back to the nightmare I had." C explained. "I'm..really not so sure... I feel that I don't trust myself about being human; my body feels new and alien, yet old and familiar." “I don’t imagine he is, not with that seal.” Fog said sitting down with a plate and started eating.

Kit thumped her fist into her hand “That’s why his smell is off!” she looked at them embarrassed for her outburst.  “Sorry C. I noticed it when we were in my room. You smell human… but also… not. I thought maybe it was something left over from wherever you got your injuries.” She coughed and picked at her plate looking at him curiously “What nightmare?” 

C blushed when she mentioned her noticing his smell and shrugged it off before continuing. "It was...torture..a-and imprisonment," he said, "I felt like I was enslaved, and the worst was that it felt real, like it all really happened before."

Fog purred as he ate but listened to C explain himself

“I’m so sorry to hear that C.” Kit frowned concerned, again heart twinging in sympathy at being trapped. She leaned against Fog unconsciously for comfort. “But you got away somehow?”

He looked up at Kit with a small smile. "It's alright, Kit. At least I got away somehow," C scratched his head, "I don't remember how, nor even see in that nightmare."

Fog rubbed her shoulder and kissed her head “I believe it is a repressed memory.. And..I know someone who is good with these kinds of things… You won’t like it though. ” Fog said turning from C to Kit.

“Who is it?” Kit said leery.

Fog winced “Dr. Tic.”

Suspicions confirmed Kit groaned and face planted against Fog’s shoulder. “Nooooooooooooo.” she whined. They’d more or less buried the hatchet but it was tenuous at best. She sighed and looked at C “As much as I hate to say it…. Tic Toc is probably the best for dealing with messed up memories…” she grimaced.

 C tilted his head. “Considering how you reacted, I assume he’s…no good guy, is he?” He asked with a hint of worry in his tone.

“It’s… complicated.” Kit scrubbed a hand across her face. “We’ve had a little bad blood between us in the past. We’ve kinda worked out our issues… I just have a hard time fully letting go of lingering trust issues from it.” She scooped up Misty off the table and cuddled him tightly to her chest once again leaning heavily on Fog. “But that’s just me. If Fog says he’s our best bet, then he’s the best bet for getting your memory back. Right?” she looked up at Fog.

“He’s a dick but memories and hypnosis will be helpful. I could pull him here so there isn’t any funny business.” Fog replied and turned to C “also, this is all up to you on how you want to handle things. ”

Kit snickered at his bluntness before sobering up. “If we’re bringing him here, I’m sending my kin to the Miniverse. I am not tempted fate that way.” she shuddered to think what mischief they would get into with Tic Toc, especially Shakko. She turned to C “Like he said it’s up to you C. What do you want to do?”

C held his chin in thought. Putting away his now empty plate, he stood up looking straight at the two. “I’m taking my chances, but I don’t want to cause any trouble here in your home, Kit.” He glanced at Fog. “You’ll take me to him, right?”

Kit shook her head. “No Fog’s right, it’ll be safer here than going there. I just don’t want the kids here.” she stood up with Misty. “Hang on I’m going to go send them over. Misty you’re going too, you can visit with BB Z.” the bitty had about been ready to disagree let out a cheer at the mention of his sweetheart.

She went to the Kitchen and explained everything to the others and sent them on their way before coming back to the other two. 

“Alright Starlight, let’s do this.” Kit said stretching.

Fog nodded and stepped into the living room. The sound of a portal opening then yelling could be heard before Fog dragged another Skeleton into the room. “You are interrupting my work!” “I’m giving you more.” 

C winced from the yelling and stared at the scene before him. He rubbed his hands out of nervousness and his feet were shifting side to side. “Uhhhh…” He decided to come close to Kit and whispered, “is it alright to just drag him like this??”

Kit patted him on the back. “It’s fine.” Probably. She took a deep breath and watched as Fog pulled Tic Toc into her living room. “Hey Tic Toc.” she waved at the irate skeleton.

In a blink the crazy skeleton was in front of Kit smirking “well~if it isn’t my favorite patient? Still struggling with your insecurities on your usefulness and intelligence I see! Ahh and someone new~” he grinned “Dr. Tic toc, are you my next patient?” He grinned. Fog pulled Kit away from him glaring.

C backed away a bit; the skeleton unnerved him. “Mmmm, not…really, no?” He crossed his arms and sternly said, “I just need your help on my memories.” Kit’s eye twitched, bristling she let Fog pull her away. “That answers that…. I still hate him. Ass.” she muttered. “Dr. Tic Toc,” C spoke up, “I need your help in bringing back my memories, considering what I’ve heard from these two,” he gestured to Fog and Kit, “you’re my best shot at this, will you do it?”

“A simple memory problem? How boring.” He sighed as he gave a playful wave to Kit. “Very well, take a seat this will be simple enough.” He motioned to a chair. C obliged and sat comfortably. “Just so you know,” he warned, brows furrowed a bit, “if you do any other funny business on me, I won’t hesitate to punch ya in the face.”

Kit nodded firmly. She’d torch his boney butt if he tried any funny business. She took Fog’s hand to ground herself and watched the ‘Good’ Doctor closely.

“yes yes threats and all that.” Tic waved him off grabbing his chin and leaned in close locking eyes. “As for you two, I’ll need absolute silence. For you my dear patient, I want you to watch my eyes closely, and calmly.” Tic s eyes started to swirl and spin with an haunting glow of deep blue. His voice took on an echoing effect “breathe in… Breathe out… Nice and slow..” C relaxed as he stared back at Tic, growing a bit heavy with Tic’s eyes starting to swirl and spin. He followed his voice, breathing in and out nice and slow, eyes growing hazy in the process.

Kit held back a snort at Tic Toc’s instructions to her and Fog. She watched the process curiously, a little surprised he didn’t seem to need his screens.

Fog rolled his eye lights as Tic continued. “We are relaxed… And as we go deeper into our breathing we are allowing our mind to unlock… Letting memories come forward.. Slowly now…”

C’s breathing grew shaky, becoming heavier by the seconds. His eyes slowly flickered its color, from dull dark blue to vibrant indigo, back and forth. His fingers started scratching on the chair; feeling an urge to look away, he flinched, trying to move.

Kit lifted a hand to C concerned. Mindful to stay quiet just in case he looked at Fog with a worried glance as if to say ‘Should we do something?’

Fog shook his head unsure, this area was a bit it of his league. Tic held onto C not flinching or breaking eye contact. “Steady now… You are in more control then you think… You must relax.. Breathe now, a nice deep slow breath.”

C held onto the chair instead whilst he did as Tic ordered. His head was starting to pound, his sight unwinding from Tic’s eyelights. Did he sleep? Was he dreaming? He doesn’t know where he is anymore. Flashes of scenes from his past appeared before him, all coming in naturally yet fast, almost too fast. C’s eyes slowly widened, tears were brimming, threatening to spill and he started to shake.

Kit took an instinctive step forward, but bite her lip. He had been severely wounded, surely the memories wouldn’t be happy. She was still ready to jump in if he got too distressed not wanting to risk C’s health, mental or otherwise.

Tic gently held onto the sides of C’s face “alright, things are going a little too quickly, but you are safe, I want you to choose your eyes, and come back to us. Follow my voice as the trance ends, calm yourself, you are safe. Steady now…”

But C could not hear him; his ears were muddled with many, many voices. He shut his eyes close; he was shaking uncontrollably, hands now grabbing on the wood as if his life depended on it and feet moving to get away. “Can’t..hear– Too….m-many….!”

Kit had a really bad feeling about this. Something seemed really off, even for traumatic injuries and repressed memories. 

Tic leaned forward gently connecting their mouths together and brought a hand up covering C’s eyes.

C’s eyes snapped open, eyes glowing indigo. The voices stopped. ‘What happened..?’ He wondered, not noticing the feeling on his mouth and still processing on everything that happened…now that he had his memories back.

Kit stood slack jawed…. this could not be an approved medical practice! But….. C seemed calmer. Win?

Tic pulled back and uncovered C’s eyes “there we are, back with us again” Fog was gawking with a flush. C blinked, eyes slowly darting everywhere, to Tic Toc, to Kit and Fog, then to his hands. He’s back, and he’s…alright?

“C? Are you ok?” Kit asked a bit flushed herself, figuring it was safe to speak now. “Do you… remember who you are?” C perked up at Kit, staring at her for a moment. “…yes,” he hesitantly said, “I remember.” The way he spoke was different, somewhat sophisticated and low. 

Fog wanted to him with an awkward smile “I suppose I’ve seen odder methods, but you seen calmer, I’m glad. How are you feeling-oh! I’ll get you some water!” Fog hurried over to the fridge while Tic took out a note book and started to take notes.

C paid no mind a bit and checked on himself. He was in his human form. His eye twitched at the sight of his fleshy hands, he clenched them to feel his magic slowly coming back to him, his indigo eyes glowing a bit from the feeling.

She blinked surprise at the shift in his tone. “That’s great! I got worried there for a moment.” Kit looked at Tic Toc “I hate to say it but I’m actually impressed Tic Toc…. even with the weird lip lock at the end.” she shook her head looking back at C in concern. “How are you feeling C?" “I feel..quite fine, normally I’d breakdown and have my magic pulse in explosion, but now I didn’t.” He wiggled his fingers as he answered. C glanced up at Kit, indigo eyes vibrant. “What happened amidst my internal crisis of flashbacks?”

Fog made his way back and handed C a good of water “here you are” Tic Toc looked up for a moment then made another note.

“Well…. I appreciate you not blowing up my house.” Kit sweat dropped at the thought. More than a little curious as to what type of magic he had and what that meant.

“You mean while you were under hypnosis? Well… you looked very uncomfortable and your eyes kept changing colors.” she gestured towards his face.

C bopped his eyebrows at that. “Of course,” he murmured. He stood up and stretched, groaning as his bones popped. “What I meant to say, dear Kit,” he reiterated, “before I woke up, came back, opened my eyes. What caused to calm me down and stop the voices in my head?” He tilted his head.

Fog snorted as Tic abruptly turned away hiding his blush. “I THINK I have over stayed my welcome, I think it’s best I leave!”

Kit turned pink darting her eyes between looking up at him and Tic Toc. “Errrrm well…. That would be Tic Toc. He uh, covered your eyes and said something to help settle you… then kind of gave you er…. mouth to mouth?”

He grew confused. Mouth to mouth? Did they mean CPR?? Sadly, this man does not know what a kiss is. So, he just went along with it, not bothering to ask. “Okaaayyy….” C cleared his throat, walked off to an area farther away from everyone, hands ready as he stood still. Tic toc relaxed and glared at Fog “my home, if you please?” Fog grinned “and see you in distress for once? Not a chance. Besides we may need you for something else. it seems he doesn’t understand what a kiss is out he doesn’t care. So can yourself.” Tic snarled “you Gasters’ think you’re so smart you smug bastard.”

“OI! Tone!” she snapped at Tic Toc. “We appreciate the help, but he’s right you need to tell C the full facts. I frankly still don’t understand why you did that either.” Kit looked at C’s sudden stillness concerned. “C… Are you ok?” “Pressure on the mouth is the quickest way to snap someone it of a panic attack!” Tic bristled while dark blue with a blush. Fog snickered “of course.” The taller skeleton looked over at Kit and followed after C “Is everything alright C?”

C didn’t hear Kit; his eyes squinted, concentrating on the amount of magic he prepped and in transforming himself back to his original self. Indigo aura appeared between his hands, growing and vibrating, affecting the room he was in and he closed his eyes. Soon, swirls of clouds surrounded him and a bright indigo light shoned the room. The light faded and he was now a djinn. “Ahhhhh…” He sighed out in relief, opening his eyes and checking himself. “There..we are..!” Fog looked surprised but smiled “ah I knew you weren’t human. Is there any need to remove that collar then?” He motioned to his neck.

Kit’s hair and fur floofed a bit with the crackle of power in the room. “Goodness. Well look at you C. I bet that feels better.” She smiled up at him taking in his new appearance. 

“It does.” He smirked at Kit. C glanced at Fog and looked to where he pointed. “Oh, this,” he realized, “unfortunately it cannot be broken no matter what.” He stated ‘as a matter of fact’-ly. “But don’t worry, it doesn’t bother me much actually.” He patted lightly the collar.

Fog looked relieved “that’s good to hear. Is there anything else you require? I’m sure the good Dr. Would be happy to help” tic flipped Fog the bird “unless it’s the destruction of the known multiverse or getting into the minds of my enemies, I don’t think I would be useful!”

C perked up when he mentioned those and glanced at Tic. “Intriguing…” He murmured to himself and grinned. “Say,” he floated towards him, “you wouldn’t happen to have a lab, do you..?”

Kit looked at Tic Toc’s offending finger with narrowed eyes that widened at C’s sudden actions. She was happy that the collar no longer bothered him, but his drastic shift in character was a little disconcerting. She cut a look at Fog. Fog shared the look with her and watched the two as Tic rose a brow bone and smirked “Of course, Dr. Tic Toc, psychology, rune, and hypnosis specialist at your service.” He bowed. Fog cleared his throat “ah, perhaps Tic you should be getting home now..”

C hummed in awe, very much interested at the mad doctor. He glanced at Fog, raising a brow at him. “Now? Why, he just came here, didn’t he? I mean, only for a little while but,” he went behind Tic and held his shoulders, “don’t you think it’s a little too early for him to go home..?” C gave a playful pout at Fog.

“not early enough” Fog glared as Tic grinned. “Oh but you were so insistent that I stay a moment ago~” Fog made sure to keep Kit behind him “if you are no longer needed then you should be leaving Tic Toc.” Fog wasn’t liking the sudden situation.

Kit moved up beside Fog her expression stern. She looked up at C, “Having him in my home to help you was my limit. I want him to leave now.” Ears pinned back she frowned at Tic Toc, “We wanted you to help C get his memories back and explain your actions, you have done both. Your welcome in my home has officially expired.” her finger tips danced with flames. “I suggest you leave on your own accord or things may get ugly fast.”

“Oh my how things have turned tense…” C mused, his finger caressing his chin as he thought of something. He bent down close to Tic and spoke lowly and quietly, “you wouldn’t mind playing a little game called..hide and seek,” he peeked at him with a sly smile and eyes, glinting in mischief, “do you, Doctor~?”

The mad doctor’s score turned sharp as his eyes gleamed with the same mischievous energy “I like the way you think~ ” Fog stepped forward “tic-” Tic toc interrupted “Yes yes I’m leaving as you and your she devil request” he said louder with a dramatic flare.

A pit formed in Kit’s stomach as her sensitive ears twitched. She did not like this not one little bit. “I am in no mood for games boys.” she scowled at Tic Toc. “You’re about to find out how much of a ‘she devil’ I can be. Go. Home. NOW.” Kit frowned at C, “Frankly the same goes for you C. I told you, you could stay until you were on your feet and you are… so to speak.” she glanced at his floating form. “So I think it’s time you left as well.” she drew closer to Fog. “What a shame,” C shrugged, “oh where would I ever stay…!” He dramatically distressed, his other hand rose up a bit. He smirked as he snapped his fingers; the doors suddenly shut along with the windows, trapping them all in the dark room with no light to provide.

Fog cursed as Tic have a dark laugh. Frantically getting out a light, Fog looked around the room. Tic was gone. Let the games begin.

Kit quickly summoned up several orbs of light. Seeing Tic Toc was no where to be seen her eye twitched. “Miiiiiiiiiiiiiist?” she called out looking up hopefully. When the golden eyed skeleton didn’t appear she sighed shoulders sagging, she looked at Fog. “I was kinda hoping this was a bad dream.”  She straightened back up and looked around seriously. Her eyes darted around the room trying to suss out where he’d went. Her nose twitched as she tried to track down the scent of peppermint mocha and madness. She shot a look towards where C had been.

C disappeared as the lights went out. Knowing that Kit has a great sense of smell, he decided to roam randomly around the room, watching over the two. He noticed the orbs of light and decided to do something about that. A snap was heard, and Kit’s wrists were wrapped with indigo magic. Another snap was heard and the orbs were zapped away into nothingness. “The hell?!” Kit yelped as her lights faded and she felt the magic wrap around her wrists. She lifted her hands and tried to summon her flames.

The moment she summoned her flames, the magic zapped her through her wrists, cutting off the summoning and electrocuting her hands in the process.

Fog grabbed onto Kit in worry “darling don’t!”

His warning came too late and Kit cried out in pain at the shocks.

C chuckled in sinister. “I think you should do it more often, Kit,” he commented, voice echoing in the room, “your cry in pain is actually quite exquisite to hear~.”

Fog growled, his eye lights glowing brightly as he held onto Kit “enough of this nonsense!” A large gaster blaster formed charging up an attack.

“Oh.” C snapped quickly. The gaster blaster was then poofed into a regular animal skull and dropped to the ground, clattering. He snapped once again and had Fog’s wrists wrapped in magic just like Kit’s. “Almost forgot about you for a moment, hehe.”

Panting to catch her breath, Kit glared. “I am not amused.” Gritting her teeth she pulled a hand free of Fog’s embrace and slapped it against one of the walls. Her beaded bracelet shone for a moment, sparking with magic, and even as C’s restraints deliveries another nasty shock it was enough to ignite special wards she had weaved through her house after Tic Toc had first invaded her home. “Hnnnngh!” Kit winced but kept herself from crying out. The magic sprung to life, and enchanted chains appeared wrapping around both intruders, locking them in place. The links glowed with different layers of binding spells both their physical forms and their magic.  “Is this how you repay a debt?” She bite out at C. C didn’t struggle to break out from the chains. He looked up at Kit. “Ahh, yes, you saved me when I was at my vulnerable.” He hummed and replied nonchalantly, “I guess, yes, this is how I repay my debt.” He looked off to the side of the room, lips puckering. “At least, how I repay…”

Tic toc smirked as runes glowed on his figure seeing the wards away from him. Calmly he wrote out another rune on the chains holding C “kitsune magic is so easy to get around it’s almost a waste of time to study it. Almost.” He grinned as Fog glared. Fog took a breath to keep a level head. “And what exactly is your plan at this rate? Or are you running in half baked as usual Dr?” Fog smirked as Tic looked annoyed.

Kit’s ear flicked and she couldn’t contain a smirk as Tic Tic worked on with his runes. She’d hidden a few surprises just for him. He triggered one such surprise when he removed one binding layer and it singed his fingers harshly before shifted the layers below into a new more intricate pattern. Focusing back on C she went back to scowling. “Well it’s a pretty crap way to do it in my opinion.” she scrubbed at her face, a wincing as a zinge of electricity jumped through her as the chains reacted to Tic Toc’s actions. “I want you to leave and not come back. You do that without causing further mischief and we’ll call it even. If you don’t I’m going to make good on the promise I made you when you first arrived and put you back in the condition I found you.” her eyes flashes dangerously, shocks be damned.

C grinned as he was set free by Tic Toc. Floating in poise, he regarded Kit’s order. It was possible for her to do so. He was still low on magic; he can’t deal against Kit in this state, and if he doesn’t take a recharge, there’s a high chance he will be cornered. But then again… “Alright,” he stated, “we’ll leave out of your hair…and fur, and bones.” He rested a hand on one of Tic’s shoulders, leaning on him a bit. “I’m also unwanted here now anyways.” He sassily spoke. He sent an unnoticeable little magic jolt through Tic’s shoulders, signifying him that they need to leave.

Tic toc waved his hand at the burn them felt the hole of magic. Giving a nod he opened a portal back to his home and gave a playful want to the upset couple “so lovely to see you both again!” He chirped stepping through the opening. Fog moved to Kit helping her stand looking worried.

Before C makes his way through the portal, he peered at Kit behind. “Such a lovely advice you gave before, only to be wasted.” He taunted with a smile and then left through the portal, shutting it as soon as possible.

Kit scowled after the pair, trying to understand what C was referencing. The only thing she could think of was her advice for him choosing who he wanted to be. Apparently he chose… and it wasn’t good. 

Breathing a little heavily she leaned into Fog swaying slightly. She sighed in relief as C’s magical shackles disappeared and the growing zapping finally stopped. She smiled weakly at Fog, drained both by the zaps and the emergency activation of her wards. “Never a dull moment, right Starlight?” 

Fog sighed as the bindings vanished from his own wrists. “Apparently. I clearly need to do research on such creatures, I will not be out done again.” He huffed and kissed her head “are you alright? Tch stupid question.” He scooped her up taking her to the couch.

Kit hung a little limply in Fog’s arms. Her head and heart hurt. She was more than little disappointed that C’s sudden change. Head splitting from the sudden use of her wards and Tic Toc’s dismantlement of them.  Kit nuzzled into Fog before groaning loudly in frustration as a thought hit her. Something that just added insult to injury of this whole mess. “Nooooooo.”

Fog set her down looking confused “ ‘noooooooo’ what?”

Kit laughed pitifully. “It’s stupid.” she rubbed her aching head a little embarrassed. “After all that drama. Stressing about a stranger appearing in my Shrine, inviting in TIC TOC, getting powers locked and zapped…. I am now plagued with the mystery of where the heck he came from, how he got here, and how he got injured to begin with.” Kit looked up at him frazzled. “I hate not knowing things Starlight…. this is gonna drive me crazy.” she whimpered. Kitsunes and curiosity goes hand in hand with them just like mischief. She focused on him. “Are you ok Fog?”

Fog nuzzled her sighing then looked up in thought “… No” he said honestly. “But I will be.”

“I’m sorry starlight.” she grimaced as the full weight of the situation really set in. “…..Fog? Did we really bring an extremely powerful djinn and Tic Toc together?” Kit sounded a mix of dazed and horrified.

Fog buried his face into her chest “I’m not acknowledging that yet. I refuse!” His yell muffled as he hugged her.

Kit cradled his skull to her chest, curling around him slightly as she hugged him back. Frankly she didn’t want to either. “You know what I want to do, dear? I want to go back to your place and pretend this whole day didn’t happen. What do you think?” she pleaded. 

Meanwhile-

Tic Toc stretched “well that was entertaining!”

"Too bad it had to cut short," C groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. "Curse my magic reoccurrences..." He sneered quietly at himself, fingers sparking magic in reaction to his annoyance.

"I suppose it has to do with that binder on your neck?" Tic asked turning on his computer.

"Yes, unfortunately..." C tugged at his collar a bit, eyes boring down at it with a frown. He looked over at Tic and floated towards him, tilting his head at the computer.

“I’m sure I can fix that too your advantage in no time.” Tic grabbed what looked to be a bar code scanner and held it to C’s neck scanning it. Once done an image of the collar appeared on the computers screen and stats appeared around it lining up with runes at a rapid pace. “Over 3 thousand runes, and I will be adding more if none of these can do the trick. ” Tic smirked. “How curious, I’d say the only thing that could rival you is an actual genie.”

C snorted. "Well, of course, genies have unlimited power, after all. We're much like angels and demons, but with almost no boundaries. No creature can rival against us." He gloated, arms crossed in pride and smirked. "We also have an advantage to morph reality and create illusions, able to bring anyone into insanity as we please~."

Tic leaned back into his chair smiling at the powerful being next to him “this is going to be a very interesting friendship”

-The End.... for now

(This was a multiperson roleplay that happened at my RP blog @kits-shrine. It was a ton of fun! Kit, Shakko, and Byakko are mine, C belongs to @unik-world, Kage belongs to @yourdorkyskelly (he was briefly mentioned and I felt I should tag you Dorky) and Misty, Obscure, Fog and Tic Toc belong to @mistrealm. )

[vvitchcrvfttm]

* . ROSS LYNCH,  TRANS MALE,  HE/HIM.  —  looks  like  CYRUS GOODE  is  attending   AURORIA UNIVERSITY  in  auradon.  they're  the  TWENTY-ONE year  old  child  of  THEODORA / THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST ( ADOPTED BY GLINDA ) ,  which  means  they're  from  OZ .  heard  they're  OBSERVANT  &  CHARMING ,  but  can  also  be  INSECURE  &  LONELY  ;  we  all  have  our  bad  days.  people  normally  associate  them  with  BLACK BRIMMED HATS & DIAMOND HEADBANDS , CANDLES LIGHTING BY THEMSELVES , BLONDE HAIR WITH DARK & INGROWN ROOTS , BLACK POLISHED FINGERTIPS CLINGING TO A STAR-TIPPED WAND.

                                        ❛  dreams unwind and LOVE’S a state of mind. ❜                                             playlist. pinterest. to listen as you read.    

yeah I cracked. I saw ‘oz’ n immediately had 2 bring my og witch child... this oc i’ve had for like, three years?? and he’s changed so much over my course of writing him bUT doing that is literally so !! fun n I’mm so excited to introduce him 2 u guys. please proceed w/ caution however bc the following contains trigger warnings for toxic relationships , manipulation , depression , and mentions of drug / alcohol / cigarette use. none I dive deeply into , but pls be cautious !!

HISTORY

He’s conceived as a product of an affair between the Witch and the Wizard - as of course , the story does start out when he first arrives in Oz and she , still kind and innocent , falls for a conman’s game. But the events that follow after spiral so quickly that she doesn’t even know she’s pregnant until everything’s over , and she gives birth in seclusion.

Well , almost seclusion.

The only person there is Glinda.

It’s slated for her crimes against Oz that she be sent to the Isle - and Glinda knows for multiple reasons that sending her child with her to the Isle of the Lost will be a horrible idea.

1.) The Isle is essentially a large prison. A child can’t be raised in a prison.

2.) All of the good that Theodora held inside of her , all of the love in her heart , was stolen and taken away from her by her wicked sister. And that’s not Theodora’s fault - but can she give a child love and affection when she’s in such a state ?? Maybe it’s possible , but it’s risky.

3.) If the child is Oscar’s , the child will have to at least have a chance of experiencing life in Oz. Even though , the Wizard has to keep up his facade.

4.) When he settles down from his crying , he looks up at Glinda with innocent , big brown eyes that she finds her heart melting for. He doesn’t sport the same green shade of skin his mother does , but his eyes are Oscar’s and his features are similar to Theodora’s before she turned wicked. And she can’t turn away a face like that.

Glinda selfishly makes the decision to hide away the child and raise him as her own - and Theodora is sent to the Isle , knowing that her baby is in the good witch’s hands and anguishly lamenting for days - until of course , he’s an afterthought.

But the baby does indeed get care from Glinda - too much , in fact. Her child is spoiled - thankfully not rotten , given that a good witch teaches her child to be a good child. And every time he talks to her , she gives him the utmost love and care a mother can give - when he discovers his identity , she’s more than willing to accept him and makes adjustments around Emerald City so everyone else knows to as well. Whenever he’s hurt or sad or sick , she refuses to leave his side so she can comfort him and protect him as much as he needs. Whenever he asks for something , if it’s not out of reason , she can’t say no. He’s spoiled - but not rotten. He’s spoiled sweet. 

But Glinda can’t protect him forever - and she knows she can’t hide his real origin from him forever. He doesn’t know why he’s had such a weird allergy to water since he was little , hence why he bathes with heaps of soap and bath salts so the water becomes a solution that won’t sting. He can’t stay in the ocean for too long since the saltwater’s definitely not pure , but will hurt after a long while. And soon he’ll begin to ask questions - and Glinda prepares herself while Cyrus experiments with other means.

Boys included.

Falling for another Auradonian boy is expected , and Cyrus sees him as the perfect gentleman. But underneath the flattering words and sweet nothings lies an ulterior motive to break into Glinda’s quarters and steal her wand since his parents were followers of Evanora’s - and Glinda killed her. And before it even comes to a breaking point , the relationship grows toxic , growing more and more evident that he’s being used for not only his status in Oz , but also because of his parentage.

It finally ends when he breaks into Glinda’s palace , finding not only the wand but the crucial information that Glinda’s son is not her biological son. And when Cyrus catches him , he firstly tells Cyrus that he’s never loved him ( along with the million things he finds wrong with him that drill into the young man’s self-esteem ) and that his mother - his mother who’s done nothing but love him his entire life - has lied to him. His biological mother is a dirty criminal on the Isle , and Cyrus will probably be just like her when he gets older. 

He’s thwarted , thank Oz ; but there’s enough damage already done. 

Cyrus grows confused and cold - disgusted that he gave his trust away so quickly to someone so VILE , but also wondering how he could easily believe the lies from both that individual and his mother because he doesn’t get it. He doesn’t understand. And a heated argument with Glinda - probably the first awful one they’ve ever had - leads Cyrus to running away from the palace for a few days , now feeling like a good portion of his life has been a lie. 

He spends his time wandering around the Emerald City - at least his mother knows he’s safe in the Emerald City , so she keeps her distance. And in the meanwhile , he researches the woman who gave birth to him to a T , reading about how she used to be so kind and sweet but then the Wizard led her to giving her heart away , and she turned wicked soon after . . . 

Her story matches up with his up until the part she turns wicked , so he’s left worrying if that’ll be his fate , as well.

When he returns home , he’s become DISTANT AND ANGRY AND MOODY - while he lets his mother hug him and kiss him and tell him how much he loves her , he’s closed off still and allows himself to fall deeper into a low he can’t seem to get out of. Everything hurts. Everything hurts and nothing seems to make it better so he decides he must have to change in order to stop it. And the only way he can seemingly change is if he takes after the roots he’s only dug up now.

To try and start anew , Glinda proposes they move to Auroria. He finishes prep school and graduates at eighteen , moving onto University ; but the change of scenery means only it’s a different palace and a different area with a bunch of faces that will also probably judge him for being different. He’s always been a quiet loner of a child - and he wants it to end.

So yes , he starts going out more. And in that sense , he starts making himself more social with parties and drinking and smoking and learning to do things his mother can’t imagine. He makes a reputation for himself as a DELINQUENT as he starts to act out , getting into fights with people he disagrees with and even using that magic she taught him for petty vengeance. Also , for business - since he’s growing talented with potions and enchantments.  

While maybe he’s opened back up to his mother , he’s still different. He’s no longer sweet and trusting and his heart is no longer upon his sleeve - instead , there’s a MASK , a mask of cockiness and callousness to hide the fact he still hurts , and he throws himself into discomforting situations to dedicate himself to acting like he’s someone he isn’t. And the more he plays into this , the more he wonders about who he really is , and who the identity of ‘ Cyrus Goode ’ is.

It used to be easy to answer the question , ‘ Are you a good witch or a bad witch ?? ’

Now . . . he’s not so sure. And with now people coming from where his mother lies , he’s wondering if he can figure out that answer. Especially maybe if he can fit in with people . . . like him.

CHARACTER & FACTS

So yES thank u sm for reading that super long backstory !! Again Cyrus is one of my deeply beloved OCs , he’s a rly confused boy trying to figure out who he is while also trying to convince himself he’s someone he isn’t to lessen his pain of being hurt. That being said , lemme be frank - how he is on the outside vs. how he is on the outside are two very different things.

On the OUTSIDE , he’s a cocky loudmouth who probably gets into way more trouble than he needs in. He’s also willing to indulge into more risks considering he thinks it’s going to numb him. A party boy through and through , he’s . . . an acquired taste. He acts careless , like he’s invincible and there’s nothing you can do to break him.

But on the INSIDE , he’s still sad , lonely , scared - but immensely sweet and soft. There’s a part of him that still wants to be himself , to openly trust and love and all - but he doesn’t think that’s an option anymore since he let himself get hurt so easily. But he’s not proud of the person he’s becoming but he doesn’t think . . . he has many options.

Sometimes , though , that mask will crack , and Cyrus will break. Sometimes it’s when he needs a release , and other times it’s unwarranted. He’s so afraid of that happening in front of other people since the fear of being vulnerable is too real , since he’s worried that’ll lead to him being taken advantage of again.

So even if he does have a lot of ‘ friends, ’ not many he’s close with. And while he has a habit of flirting and sleeping around , relationships aren’t his thing - despite the fact he actually WANTS love and validation and affection to a t.

But that isn’t to say his charm is fake - no , not at all. He’s naturally a bit of a charming kid , extremely observant with body language and reading the atmosphere. And he’s pretty good at keeping a conversation , genuinely knowing the right spots to hit as well as how to keep a conversation going on how to end it. It’s what makes people want to keep him around despite the fact he can be fucking annoying at times.

He’s a good kid underneath everything - there’s just a lot of confusion & denial & fear covering it. 

He’s EXTREMELY talented & bright in both magic and art !! He’s fond of painting and sketching and often expresses his true emotions in his artwork - it’s a bit why he’s so hesitant to show him to people.

And magic.... well , Glinda taught him everything he knows. And his own studies made for him to teach himself valuable practices , as well.

He’s a practicing witch religiously , as well. Crystals , sigils , tarot cards , etc. He’s an expert in all of it. He almost ALWAYS has at least one crystal on his person - and a lot of the jewelry he wears is enchanted. 

SPEAKING OF JEWELRY & AESTHETICS ,,,, dude’s fashion sense has changed a bit since he’s tried to embrace more of his inner West Witch but I will say. Both styles are cute.

When he was more in tune with his ‘Good Witch’ side , he wore very nice silver , blue , white etc. vests with glittery patterns over nice white shirts with rolled up sleeves. Yk how Glinda has her crown ?? He had ( and still has ) multiple bejeweled headbands bc frankly they look cute on him. 

Over tIME THOUGH he’s definitely embraced the ‘witch in all black’ thing 100%. Likes the big, floppy black hats and almost always has a black headband to accompany it. Choker necklaces, biker gloves, leather jackets - also his own pair of ruby boots , but they’re not powerful or anything they just look cute. Also almost always has some pair of sunglasses on bc they make a nice accessory even when you’re wearing them on the top of your head and not ur face.

And again - both ways , 100% is always wearing a few crystals and enchanted pieces of jewelry. 

To express himself a bit more he’s also gotten a few tattoos !! Mainly on his arms for now , but there’s one exception since he has a teeny , tiny star on his right cheek. It looks more like a little freckle if you’re not up close - but other than that , it’s stars and stuff along his arms as well as sigils , spells , etc.

He’s definitely not as strained w/ his mom rn since he’s taken a chance to like. Think things over. Since it’s been about 4-5 years since the initial reveal his biological mother is Theodora. While he’s still very confused about . . . everything , he stills takes walks with his mom through her garden and routinely talks to her about stuff. Maybe it’s not super duper close like before , but it’s better than four years ago. 

It takes a lot to earn his trust. Like , a shit ton. If u rly wanna form a close bond with him and earn his trust ur gonna have to work for it bc Cyrus is determined to not let himself get hurt again and that means he’s extremely guarded.

Still has that water allergy : ( But it’s not all liquids it’s just !! Pure / natural water. So the more gunked up the water is with a solute , the less likely it is to make him sizzle.

Also has 100% taught himself how to ride a broom thx to his mother aka ‘SURRENDER DOROTHY’

and also smoke cigarettes out of crushed poppy seeds bc again, gotta stay tru to mother

Again I think I specified this earlier ago bt he’s determined to try and fit in with at least some Isle kids since . . . his mother’s on the Isle. She’s a villain. His mom is Glinda but his mother is Theodora and he wants to be closer to her and he thinks he’s sort of doing so by embracing the Isle kids and wanting to be a part of them.

I still feel like he’s very. Teeter tottery on it since he grew up in Auradon and probably has some meaningful connections there and he doesn’t want to say goodbye to that but also he learns now it’s by a twist of fate he didn’t end up on the Isle and almost wonders if he was meant to.

I’m going very ‘Fire Emblem Fates’ on this idk I just found the idea of an AK adopted when he was supposed to be a VK as. Intriguing.

He’s also dealing w/ like. If his Mom ever decides to like , retire or something ?? Is he the next Good Witch of the South or is he destined to be the next Wicked Witch of the West ??? It’s tough.

Also bc I forgot to mention it already !! He’s panromantic pansexual and 6′3 bc I fckin said so. May or may not have researched height spells to make himself taller.

I also just wanna let u all know if this intro seems v. Serious I promise u Cyrus is a witty memefucker and not in a Luke ‘deadpan snarker’ way he’s just. Loudmouthed n uncensored and makes jokes at every given minute he can bc eVERYONE likes a funny guy.

Again he’s like. A comfort character. This dude means so much to me n I’m so excited to throw him at u guys.  

I wanted 2 list characters that helped inspire who he is today bt. I think I might save that 4 like... a graphic or smth. :^)

WANTED CONNECTIONS & PLOTS 

PLEEEEASE GIVE ME OLD FRIENDS OF HIS IN AURADON THAT KNOW HOW SOFT HE IS INWARDLY

Also friends that r just. Rly shocked by how much he’s changed. and kinda miss how he used to be before he got hurt : (

friends that sorta prefer how he’s changed?? maybe partygoing friends n stuff???

folks who are lowkey ‘wow goode got cool/hot/badass/etc.’ bc it’s definitely a signficant Shift

VKs who are encouraging him to embrace tht side of him more n dig down to his roots !!

AKs who are encouraging him to not have to try n change for that n be how he always was !!

Ppl in general who just rly would like for him to be himself and embrace who he is rather than trying to stick to a single side !!

AKs who see him as kind of like. A traitor 4 wanting to get close with the VKs

VKs who see him as too much of an AK and r basically like ‘idc if ur mother literally coined the term ‘wicked witch’ u can’t sit with us.

Rly I’m just so addicted to this ‘CHOOSE A SIDE’ thing like I generally find that as a plot so. Interesting n I def want all the connections that are sort of impacted by it since Cyrus is discovering so much abt himself

I also wld love some folks in generals he can like... be soft around. Let down his walls around. Slowly they get to know him and take the time and patiently earn his trust even tho he rly is a lot to handle.

Ppl who solely like him for the fact he can do magic bc again haha y’all can deffo use him idm

Ppl who rly dislike him whether it be for the fact he acts like a cocky dick on the outside or they don’t like how he’s trying to change himself and he doesn’t seem authentic at all literally Cyrus can b kind of sucky so pls make ppl dislike him. None of my OCs get along w/ him. Luke maybe dated him for a day n got tired already. 

He’s a lot 2 handle.

Okay he’s kind of a flirt like Luke and even tho he’s not nearly on their self-proclaimed philanderer level he still kinds. Gets around so pls gimme hookups on either end

Old crushes he used to have in Auradon when he was a lil kid, in middle school, high school w/e that never happened for whatever reasons

Also an angsty unrequited crush bc I love pain

Exes that were folks he tried to date in Auradon after he got hurt bt it just. Didn’t work out for w/e reason - probably bc Cyrus is terrified of getting hurt again.

Would also lov that one longterm relationship that lasted for like. A year or so while Cyrus was going through his shit that was probably rly good for him and they though it’d last but he had to break it off out of his own fear : (

First healthy love plot based off of San Francisco by TDE per piacere?

Listen I kno I already have a first love plot wanted for Luke bt this one’s sad for dIFFERENT REASONS 

I’d lov like ?? A will they/won’t they where Cyrus kind of has to open up n’ stuff before they can rly be together and it’s just up in the air even tho there are mUTUAL feelings ?? I wanna explore the relationship part of this tho instead of just. Throwing them into a ship n the next day they’re 2gether. Also would have to b discussed when seeing chemistry between the characters since. Ya.

WLD DEF B OPEN 2 A POLY WILL THEY/WONT THEY TOO

I already cleared thru enemies but again pLS GIVE ME RELATIONSHIPS THAT SHIFT BETWEEN LIKE. FRIENDS TO ENEMIES. EXES TO ENEMIES. ENEMIES TO FRIENDS. BACKSTABBING BITCHES. THAT SHIT. I LOVE IT. GIVE ME THE DRAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Thats it.

me: i kno i just listed the obligatory shippy stuff but i want to remind u again i love it when other characters hate mine

I love just exploring. Connections and relationships between characters in general whether they’re hostile, platonic, romantic, etc. like I love exploring that stuff like I’m here 4 everything.

ibh sometimes i worry abt posting shippy connections just bc i dont wanna give the impression thATS ALL I WANT even tho i think i listed more non-shippy connections than shippy

...i still worry.

bt yeah licherally give me anything. I’m a plot hoe even tho I suck at it.

[i-also-miss-our-talks]

Headcannon where Davey takes you home for Christmas for the first time and you meet the whole fam (minus Les)?

Holy fuck this is long and I don’t know if its actually good but I hope you like it! Let me know if you don’t, though, and I’ll rewrite it!

WC: 2,294 

Warning: Swearing, Pretty sure that’s it

Masterlist

so Davey

sweet boy

met you the first year of college

you two were in the library at the same time to get the same book

and yadda, yadda, yadda, hugs, kisses, confessions, you two start dating

yay!

you have been dating for about two years and now it’s the holidays

yay! x 2

and unfortunately, you weren’t able to go home for christmas because it’s a lot of money and you’re a college student so you don’t have money

aw

but Davey said you could come home with him for christmas

yay! x3

so after your last exam, you pack up your stuff in Davey’s car and ride with him to his house (were gonna say it’s the 22nd for story reasons)

his house is about four hours away from the college so you guys made a playlist and belted out the songs for the whole ride

(of course Davey tried to be a show off and riff everything but holy fuck was he good at it)

by the time you guys got to his house, it was pitch black a snowing heavily

you two grab your luggage and laugh as you try not to slip on the ice running up to the door

Les is the one who answers the door and gasps

“Davey!”

he lunges at his brother for a hug but ends up throwing both of them into the snow behind him

you smile and take pictures of the brotherly reunion

then Les and Davey get up and help take the bags inside

“mom! dad! David and Y/N are here!”

you take of your shoes next to Davey’s and follow him to the kitchen where his folks are

you’ve met them before so you give them hugs and such before heading up to Daveys room

when you two got there, Davey blushed and rubbed the back of his neck

“do you wanna just share the bed?”

you smile and nod

then the next day comes because im too lazy to write the rest of the night

so the next day is the 23rd and the day before the rest of the family comes so you guys start getting stuff ready

Les and Davey set up the tree and stockings and decorate the tree

his dad goes outside to put up lights

and you and his mom bake cookies for all his family members

and you’re all wearing christmas hats because wearing christmas hats while decorating is mandatory

his mom told you stories from when Davey was little during christmas while you two mixed the batter

like one time before Les was born (they’re about nine years apart) Davey went sledding with his dad but he went down the hill too fast and basically flew down it. he ended up getting the front of the sled stuck in a snow drift and he went flying and smacked into a tree trunk and that’s the story of how Davey lost both of his front teeth

another time there was a girl he liked freshman year of high school and he wanted to get her a present so he got her this really pretty (and expensive) necklace while he was out buying a little harmonica for Les cause the little five-year-old saw a kid in a commercial playing one so he really wanted one. so Davey bought both of them and went home a wrapped them both in the same wrapping paper. But the necklace and the harmonica were both in a long rectangle box so the next day at school he accidentally gave the girl the harmonica

while the cookies were in the oven, you and his mom joined the bros in putting up other stuff around the house

you and Les went around the house to put up little stacks of presents

when you came back Davey asked you to help him put something up

you nodded, of course, and followed him

he brought you to the front door and pulled the mistletoe out from behind his back

you giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck as he lifted it above your heads

you were about to kiss Davey when his dad opened the door

Davey blushed deeply

“d-dad!”

he laughed

“sorry, Dave. but i need your help”

Davey sighed and handed you the mistletoe before grabbing his coat and boots to follow his dad outside with

you gave him a quick peck on the cheek to give him a smile before he closed the door

a few hours later, Davey came back inside shivering and covered in snow from helping outside

you helped him take his jacket and boots off and led him to the couch in the living room, cuddling next to him to warm him up

Davey wrapped his arms around you and kissed your forehead

you two fell asleep all cuddled up like that

aww!

cuties!

his mom snapped a photo and texted it to you after posting it on her Facebook with the hashtag #mysleepingbabies

Daveys mom is actually the real MVP

Les politely woke you two up for dinner by throwing a snowball at Daveys face

he chased Les around the house while you go with his mom to get pizza

when you come back, Davey opens the front door for you two

he takes the pizza out of your hands and shyly kisses you

you’re like “?” until he points to the mistletoe he hung above the front door

you roll your eyes but cant help and giggle at his dorkiness

Davey kisses his moms cheek too before bringing the food to the kitchen

your boy is so sweet

love him forever pls

now

the next day

christmas eve

family christmas

you got dressed in nice jeans and a cute red sweater with a santa hat to top it off

Davey matches you with jeans and a nice christmas sweater

before going downstairs, he just holds you for a bit on his bed

“Y/N, listen. my family can get…weird”

“Davey, im sure it’ll be fine”

“they’re not like mom or dad or Les. they’re…well..you’ll see. but if you ever feel like it’s too much let me know and we can just come back up here and cuddle”

you laugh and give him a quick peck

“only if you do the same”

your boyfriend nods and grabs your hand, leading you downstairs

Les is dressed nice too

and guess what?

guess

fucking

what?

Les and Davey are wearing matching sweaters

and his mom and dad are wearing matching sweaters

turns out the whole family had matching sweaters

they’re the best family tbh

then little Les hands you a present and tells you to open it

you do as you’re told and gasp because holy crap its the same sweater they’re all wearing

“you better hurry and put it on before the rest of the family gets here” their mom says

you start to tear up because oh my gosh you’re a part of their family they got you a sweater to match them oh my gosh

you quickly run upstairs and change before coming down and hugging Davey

“did you know about this?”

he nodded

“of course i did. my mom came up with it though”

then zip zap zoo the rest of the family is in the Jacobs household

we’re talking cousins, aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas, even grunckles and grants

its a lot of people

and they all love you

they keep teasing Davey like

“how’d you snag her you nerd?” cousin Frank

“blink twice if he paid you to date him” uncle Thomas

“why don’t ya ditch the bookworm and hang with a real man?” Race

“Race, what the hell are you doing here? get out,” Davey said and pushed him out the door

the party was great and everyone was so nice

his grandma loved your hair and how when Davey looked at you his eyes would almost sparkle. she told you that her mother told her her husbands eyes sparkled like that when they were still dating and that’s how she knew he was the one

you secretly told her later that you knew Davey was the one a year ago when he called you beautiful after your phone went off at three in the morning when he slept over in your dorm. the light from your phone screen had shown off your messy hair, gunk in the cracks of your eyes, and the slight drool crust on the corner of your lips. but Davey woke up with you and as soon as he saw you in the light, he called you beautiful. that’s why you knew he meant it

Davey’s uncle was a bit weird, though

not uncle Thomas

uncle Logan

he would just stand in the corner of the room and watch the party from afar

he never spoke unless spoken too

he had like twenty handfuls of pretzels, but half a glass of water

yeah

weirdo

kinda gave you the creeps

but anyway

Davey did get a bit jealous when a few of his cousins started hitting on you, but you just simply took him to the mistletoe every time and that seemed to make him feel better

then it was dinner time

you sat in-between Davey and Les and across from Race and Albert

“how do you keep getting into my house? get out of here!”

after chasing off Race and Albert, you ended up sitting across from his Aunt Judy and Grandma

during dinner, Davey held your hand under the table

aww

he’s so sweet

you helped Les and his mom clean the table while Davey went to go do something

you didn’t know what it was. all he told you was that it was “a family tradition”

so you didn’t ask questions

after dishes, you followed Les to Davey where he sat at a piano

(holy crap this is getting long. i’ll try to speed things up)

you sat next to Davey on the bench and smiled as he began to play classic christmas songs

his whole family sang together in pretty much perfect harmony and you were just amazed

like wow not only is Davey the most amazing singer ever but he comes from a family of amazing singers like wtf i don’t think that’s fair

but yeah

so after all the songs, everything was calming down when everyone gathered around the tree to open presents

everyone apologized that they didn’t get you a gift cause they didn’t know you were coming, but you said it was fine and helped Davey open his

afterwards, Davey took you to his room while everyone messed with their new gifts

he sat with you on his bed and pulled out a small box from under his bed

“here. i was gonna wait till tomorrow, but i felt bad for you not getting anything just now”

you smiled and kissed his cheek

“its not a harmonica, is it?”

Davey blushed

“y-you know about that?! how?!”

you laughed and ignored his question by opening the gift

your heart almost stopped at the sight

“Davey…”

your boyfriend took the ring out of the box and held your hand

WHOA



CHILL GUYS



ITS JUST A PROMISE RING



DAVEY WOULDN’T PROPOSE AFTER ONLY TWO YEARS

Y’ALL GOOD?

“Y/N, i want to make a promise. i want to promise that i’ll always love you and care for you and help you no matter what. i know we’ve only been together for two years but i just know you’re the one”

you put a hand over your mouth to quiet your sobs

“so, Y/N, can i give you this ring as a promise that one day i can replace it with something permanent? something that’s us and only us?”

(okay. listen. deh is amaze so deal with the reference)

you nodded and let him slip the ring onto your finger

he’s crying too as he pulls you in for a deep kiss

when you two part, you lay down on the bed with him, resting your head on his chest

you two didn’t even realize you had fallen asleep without leaving cookies for Santa

(how dare u)

the next morning you were woken up by Les jumping onto Davey’s gut and screaming “IT’S CHRISTMAS” into your ears

Davey groaned in pain as you got up and changed into some sweatpants and a t-shirt before heading downstairs

you smiled as Les smiled at what Santa had brought

he immediately tore open his gifts once his mom and dad had sat on the couch with coffee

you sat on the ground with your back against the wall and watched Les show off his gifts

Davey came down a few minutes later in PJ pants and a t-shirt, clutching his stomach as he sat next to you

you leaned into his side and he wrapped his arm around you

omg

guys

you two are so cute

i can’t with you guys

Les put yours and Daveys presents in front of you so you could open them

you smiled and handed Davey the present that was from you

“Merry Christmas, babe. hope you like it”

inside was a pair of new tap shoes cause the ones he currently has will be busted the next time he tries to do a shuffle

Davey gasps

“Y/N these are exquisite! they must’ve cost a fortune!”

(tap shoes are expensive as hell, man)

you just shrugged

Davey hugged you tightly and kissed your temple

“i love you”

you giggled and hugged him back

“i love you too”

christmas is the best

especially when your boyfriend is Davey Jacobs and you get to celebrate with his whole family

the fucking finally end

[nottellingu]

d bees n d birds

JILY CHALLENGE | @nottellingu vs @siriuslysnuffles   social media au + “lily takes a photo of a pretty boy in lectures and sends it to her friend remus who promptly freaks out bc “omG that’s my roommate?? this is bloody brilliant” marauder meddling ensues”

(a brill prompt w lots of potential that i murdered but yay i finally finished)  thanks @jilychallenge

1.1k

Remus Lupin to Lily Evans: I can’t come to the health lecture.  I'm sick.

Lily Evans: whaaaaaaat?!?!?!

Lily Evans: but remus

Lily Evans: they are going to talk bout d bees n d birds

Lily Evans: the BIRDS and the BEES

Lily Evans: STOP LEAVING ME ON READ REMUS JOHN LUPIN!!!!!

Lily Evans: i hate you

.

James Potter sent a photo to Sirius Black

James Potter: loml just sat down next to me in health

Sirius Black: is dat evans?

James Potter: u kno dis goddess

Sirius Black: way outta ur league mate

James Potter: rude

.

Lily Evans sent a photo Remus Lupin

Lily Evans: nvm i forgive you

Lily Evans: mr.tdh sat next to me instead

Remus Lupin: mr.tdh?

Lily Evans: mr. tall dark handsome

Remus Lupin: oh

.

Sirius Black sent a screenshot to 3 musketeers + pete

Sirius Black: prongsie has a crush on lily evans

Peter Pettigrew: lol

James Potter: does pvt chat mean nothing to u

Sirius Black: #yolo

James Potter: yolo cant b ur response to everything

Sirius Black: #yolo

Sirius Black changed the group name to #yolo

James Potter: blocked

.

Remus Lupin sent a screenshot to Sirius Black

Remus Lupin: Can you believe it?

Sirius Black: otp

Remus Lupin: I should never have told you about that.

Sirius Black: we have 2 do sthing

Remus Lupin: Sirius no.

Sirius Black: 2 l8

.

Sirius Black created Operation Lames

Sirius Black added Remus Lupin to Operation Lames

Sirius Black added Peter Pettigrew to Operation Lames

Sirius Black added Marlene McKinnon to Operation Lames

Sirius Black added Dorcas Meadowes to Operation Lames

Sirius Black  added Alice Fortescue to Operation Lames

Sirius Black sent a screenshot to Operation Lames

Sirius Black: At 10:23 am James Fleamont Potter sent the above message to a handsome Mr. Sirius Orion Black.

Sirius Black forwarded  a screenshot to Operation Lames

Sirius Black: At 10:34 am Lily idk-her-middle-name Evans  sent the above message to Remus John Lupin.  

Sirius Black: By the power vested in me by Cupid I appoint you all junoir matchmakers.

Sirius Black: With me as senior matchmaker, it is our responsibility to bring these two lost souls together.

Sirius Black: Let's  make magic happen,  people!

Alice Fortescue: omg this is sooo cute!!!

Peter Pettigrew: grool!

Marlene McKinnon: wat shud we do?

Dorcas Meadowes: lilys mid name is jane.

Remus Lupin: For this you can have perfect grammar?

Sirius Black: fuk u moony its tru luv

.

Sirius Black (@siriuslyblanc) tweeted: all u losers are invited to a party chez moi. Esp @gunsnlilies and @jpotter_unofficial

.

Marlene McKinnon to Operation Lames: seriously? that was ur plan?

Sirius Black: I’m always sirius

Dorcas Meadowes removed Sirius Black from Operation Lames

.

Sirius Black to Peter Pettigrew: pete

Sirius Black: pete

Sirius Black: pete

Sirius Black: peter

Sirius Black: PETER

Sirius Black: PETER PETTIGREW!!!!

Peter Pettigrew: WHag?!?!

Sirius Black: add me back to op lames

Peter Pettigrew: u woke me up from my nap for THAt

Sirius Black: pls

.

Peter Pettigrew added Sirius Black to Operation Lames

Sirius Black: miss me?  ;)

Dorcas Meadowes removed Peter Pettigrew from Operation Lames

Dorcas Meadowes removed Sirius Black from Operation Lames

.

Peter Pettigrew to Sirius Black: i hate u

.

Sirius Black to Remus Lupin: remus

Remus Lupin: No.

.

James Potter (@jpotter_unofficial) tweeted: @siriuslyblanc i live with you??? y do i get a special invite???

.

Sirius Black (@siriuslyblanc) tweeted: because i love u

.

Lily Evans (@gunsnlilies) tweeted: @siriuslyblanc does that mean you love me too?

.

Sirius Black (@siriuslyblanc) tweeted: @gunsnlilies nah i think ur a swot so u got a speical invite

.

James Potter to Sirius Black: did u really invite lily evans?

Sirius Black: yea

James Potter: idk if i shud kiss you or kick you

Sirius Black: save d smooches 4 evans

.

Lily Evans (@gunsnlilies) tweeted: @siriuslyblanc you spelled ‘special’ wrong

.

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: who is @jp_unofficial?

Sirius Black: jim iams

Lily Evans: ????

Sirius Black: prongs

Lily Evans: ??????

Sirius Black: james

Lily Evans: ????????

Sirius Black: james potter

Lily Evans: ?????????????

Sirius Black sent a photo to Lily Evans

.

Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: et tu

Remus Lupin: What did I do?

Lily Evans: idk but

Lily Evans: sirius sent me and james potter a special invite

Lily Evans: who is the same guy i texted you a photo of this morning

Lily Evans: according to insta you are all part of some clique

Lily Evans: you are getting coal for christmas

Remus Lupin: As long as I get  chocolate for Easter

Lily Evans: im not that cruel

.

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: my mum said j cant come

Sirius Black: ask her again

.

Remus Lupin added Sirius Black to Operation Lames

Sirius Black: hi

Remus Lupin added Peter Pettigrew to Operation Lames

Remus Lupin: Lily’s on to us.

Alice Fortescue: i got this

.

Sirius Black (@siriuslyblanc) tweeted: @gunsnlilies #yolo

.

Alice Fortescue to Sugar and Spice: yall going to blacks party?

Marlene  McKinnon: yep

Dorcas Meadowes: yes

Alice Fortescue: lils?

Lily Evans: no

Lily Evans: gonna do slughorns paper

Marlene McKinnon: nerd

Alice Fortescue: please lil

Alice Fortescue: frank said hell be there

Lily Evans: marls and dork are going

Alice Fortescue: but theyll be 2 busy kissing

Dorcas Meadowes: tru

Marlene McKinnon: ily

Dorcas Meadowes: ily more

Alice Fortescue: please lils!!!!

.

Marlene McKinnon to Make Alice Longbottom  a reality 2k17 : do it for the longbottoms lil

.

Dorcas Meadowes to Marlene McKinnon: who needs tindr when they got us

Marlene McKinnon: loooooool

.

Lily Evans  to Sugar and Spice: fine

Alice Fortescue: YAY!!!!!!

.

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: she said ok

.

Sirius Black to Operation Lames: nice work alice

Alice  Fortescue: B)

Alice Fortescue: girl power

.

Marlene McKinnon to Sugar and Spice: alice wear ur jeans miniskirt and pink jumper with ur hair down, nude lipstick,  blush. fuzzy boots

Alice Fortescue: k

Marlene McKinnon: lily wear ur black jeans,  green silky top and black slinky heels. Messy pony, chapstick, eyeliner and mascara

Lily Evans: dont tell me what to do

Marlene McKinnon: too bad

Marlene McKinnon: do it or die

Dorcas Meadowes: whoa there

Lily Evans: im going as alices wingwoman

Lily Evans: got no one to impress

Marlene McKinnon: lily lily lily

Marlene McKinnon: no wonder u r single

Lily Evans: hey!

Dorcas Meadowes: the birds got a point

Lily Evans: what about dorky

Marlene McKinnon: im on my way 2 her flat

Dorcas Meadowes: !!!!!!!!!

Lily Evans: :P

.

Remus Lupin to Operation Lames: This is Sirius on Moony’s phone

Remus Lupin: CODE RED!!!!  CODE RED!!!!

Marlene  McKinnon: what

Remus Lupin sent a photo to Operation Lames

Remus Lupin: LAMES SNOGGING IN THE KITCHEN

Remus Lupin: Also Moony’s phone has proper autocorrect that corrects spelling and adds punctuation and shit.

Remus Lupin: Remus John Lupin is a phony.

Dorcas Meadowes: scandalous

Peter Pettigrew: is that

Peter Pettigrew: tongue

Marlene McKinnon: its called french kissing

Marlene McKinnon: making out

Marlene McKinnon: lip lacrosse

Marlene McKinnon: tonsil tennis

Peter Pettigrew: i get it

Alice Longbottom: mission accomplished

Sirius Black: dammit

Sirius Black: i wanted to say that

[panickedpansexualprincess]

I don't dislike Tilde per se. I liked her a lot in TSS. She was strong and took ownership of her sexuality. But in TGC I think she was unneeded and unbelievable. She turned Eggsy into a prince/kept boy, forced him out of a career he loved, was a drug user, and manipulated him to propose/marry her. Not the signs of a good person or a healthy relationship. Still I'd never post hate for her in any of the tags. I just wish everyone would tag for her and her relationships so blacklist can catch it.

I appreciate that you don’t intend to post any hate for Tilde. I can also see why you might feel the way you do about her. I don’t think it’s near that cut and dry, though, to be perfectly honest. And, since you messaged me about it, I assume that you’re open to talking about it all, so I’ll be frank.

Although, haha, before I start the frank part, I’ll say that while I don’t tag individual characters, that’s not part of my tagging system, I do tag my Kingsman ships, so I can rec that if you want to block them, you might want to block ‘Royal Eggs,’ ‘Royal Hartwin,’ ‘Royal Merwin,’ and ‘Royal Merhartwin.’ Those are the ship names I’m using and the ones I’ve seen others use.

Okay. The frank, thoughtful bits now.

I was mildly unsure about Tilde on my first watch through. Mostly because yeah, okay, the most likely reason they wrote her in was to give Eggsy a heterosexual relationship, in an attempt to try and avoid slash ships. Which, is kind of funny, because good lord the Hartwin overtones are insane in TGC, far more so than I ever picked up from TSS. It’s like, they wrote Eggsy into a het relationship, and then ramped up the gay to about five thousand. And I’m saying that as someone who doesn’t ship Hartwin as my main ship, cause my main ship is Merwin, but lord in heaven was the Hartwin strong in this movie. So, uh. Guys, guys, mixed signals here. XD

(Which is why I just figure he’s bi. Or pan. Or somewhere around there in the inbetween. XD)

That said, I didn’t stay unsure for long. Mostly because, well, A. the idiots already fridged one of our strong ladies because wtf (and she’s not dead, dammit, I refuse), so I am going to happily embrace Tilde for the wonderful lady she is- and she is a strong woman in her own right, as we know from TSS. B. I was insanely happy that if they were going to pair Eggsy off with a lady, at least it wasn’t Roxy, because good lord no please no. By which I mean, with no disrespect towards people who ship Roxy/Eggsy, they are my NOTP/BROTP, and I just. No. Let Roxy and Eggsy have their broship, pls. C. I was actually really happy to see her back as more than just a sex joke. Which I know a lot of people tried to reduce her to one in TSS, and just. No. D. Poly ships. I love me some poly ships, because I wholeheartedly believe the human heart can love more than one person, so yeah, okay Eggsy loves Tilde. Got it. Doesn’t mean he can’t still love Harry, or Merlin, or anyone else. Embrace the poly ships! I do!

So. My doubts were soothed, and I dived happily into accepting Tilde and her relationship with Eggsy. Which brings me to your concerns.

I’m going to hit the ‘drug user’ bit first. Which is a big issue, and a sticky one. Now I say this as someone who, until this year, had never touched any drugs ever. Which, I broke my record this year, once, because it’s one possible treatment for some of my health issues, and when I tried it, I just went. Eh, this does nothing, whatever, I’m good, thanks anyway. So I have no connection to drugs, or affinity for them. But I’m a firm believer in the freedom of choice, especially when it comes to a person’s own body, and one of my beliefs is that the government really needs to butt out of trying to control what people do with their own bodies. Which means I’m actually pro legalization of drugs. Which was really kind of odd/funny, because I agreed with some of the things Poppy said in the movie. Which sounds a lot worse than I mean, haha.

It’s. Kind of a point, in the movie. Poppy is, of course, a psychopath and completely in the wrong with everything she was doing, but. She wasn’t wrong about some of the things she said. Like, the commentary she makes to Charlie, re: sugar vs cocaine. It’s also kind of a big thing if you look at Fox: she argues with Not!Trump about how not all drug users are the bad criminal types people stereotypically associate with drugs. Fox makes the rather poignant point that she uses whatever it is she uses to help her get through life, because frankly, working for Not!Trump is a nightmare I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Champ makes the point too, and Ginger, when they talk about Tequila; he’s a good man, a good Statesman, he just has a bit of a wild side. Additionally, if you read the book, it very poignantly hits on the people who use drugs medicinally, to deal with things like cancer and mental health issues, but who are affected by the Blue Rash because of where they got their medicine from. And let me tell you, that was a point that hit kind of hard in my house, because none of us are neurotypical, and if our doctor prescribed it to use, marijuana could actually be a medicine for some of us. And we are, ironically, in Kentucky, not even two hours away from Louisville where the Statesman are based, and bills to legalize medicinal marijuana have been proposed here as recently as January of this year.

So what I mean by that long ass paragraph is. Being a drug user isn’t necessarily a bad thing. And that’s a point that is specifically raised in the narrative in the movie. Because yeah, Poppy is fucking batshit crazy, but her end goal of legalizing drugs? Isn’t batshit crazy. Which is why Not!Trump and Whiskey end up firmly in the Bad Guy camp, because they’re willing to condemn billions of people to death for something that’s not necessarily bad.

So does Tilde use drugs in TGC? Yes, of course, she gets the blue rash. We see her light up. Am I going to condemn her for that? No. She smokes something in a moment when she is under extreme stress and upset. That’s her choice, for her body. And that single use isn’t enough to show us if she uses it irresponsibly, or if she’s out of control with it. I’d actually assume that if she was out of control in her drug usage, Eggsy wouldn’t be with her. As he points out, he grew up in a place where drugs destroyed lives; I highly doubt he would be with someone who was destroying their life with drugs. I’ll also point out that he doesn’t actually seem concerned with her usage. He’s scared as hell that she has the disease, but he never condemns her usage or seems against it.

Alright. So the manipulating him into proposing bit. Hoo boy. I understand where you’re coming from. It was a thought I had in the theatre myself, while watching the first time. However, after a lot of thought, I don’t think that’s what’s going on here.

I’ll say flat out; I think that bit is a bit of shoddy writing. I think it was unnecessary, and that it should have logically been something Eggsy and Tilde would have already discussed, considering that honeypots are something they were trained on during training. They were told to get to know Lady Sophie biblically, remember? Which, yeah, turned out to be a ruse for the train test, but it was definitely something they were trained for.

But, the fact that I think it’s shoddy writing aside; it has been pointed out to me, when I was pondering it, that it could very likely be something they hadn’t discussed yet because their relationship, while almost a year along in TGC, had kind of a jump start with both of them suffering from. Issues. You know, being held captive, having just lost his mentor, and they kind of jumped into it headlong, and probably missed some big discussions that they should have had, but didn’t. So we’re looking at this as;

Tilde doesn’t know that honeypots are a thing Eggsy might be expected to do. Clearly, they haven’t talked about it. All she knows is that, this man that she loves, who clearly loves her, is suddenly telling her that he needs to sleep with another woman. And that’s a Big Thing to have suddenly thrown on your plate, especially when it’s a situation of “I need an answer right this moment, fate of the world depends on it.” So it’s pretty damn understandable that Tilde is thrown for a huge loop by it all. She’s shocked, surprised, and definitely feeling hurt. And here’s Eggsy, telling her he wants to spend the rest of his life with her- which in any other situation could easily be a proposal. And, in the confused, hurried, disarray of emotions she’s dealing with- she’s not pressuring him to propose, I think it’s pretty clear that she thinks that might actually be what’s happening.

So here you’ve got both of them super stressed and freaked out and confused. Eggsy’s stressed as fuck about it, doesn’t want to have sex with Clara, but is asking anyway, cause the world is kind of at stake, and he kind of accidentally almost proposes. Tilde is stressed as fuck, and hurt by this sudden request, and confused, and she thinks he might have just proposed, but she’s not sure, because wtf, and. And then Eggsy’s backpedaling, because shit, shit, shit, public figure, and fuck. (And, one of the things that I liked in the book, is that you get more of Tilde’s POV here, because she’s struggled with being the Crown Princess all her life, and now it feels like Eggsy is rejecting her because of her being the Crown Princess.) Confusion and hurt abounds on both sides of that conversation. And if you pay attention.

Eggsy says they need to sit down and Talk about this. Later. Tilde is upset, but gives a (somewhat understandably bitter) okay, and walks away for the moment. And it’s pretty clear that they’ve both made mistakes here. And that they both greatly care for each other, because otherwise they wouldn’t be that hurt.

And. Yeah. It’s this whole huge convoluted ball of fucked up emotions and mistakes and they should have talked about this already, but because writing, they hadn’t, so it all comes out fucked up and misunderstood. But I don’t see any of it as Tilde forcing Eggsy to propose. She’s thinks he has, and then surprise, no, not really, and where do they go from a misunderstanding like that?

Which leads into Tilde forcing him to be a prince/kept boy, and forcing him out of a career he loves. And. I’mma say one thing here, first off, because. Kingsman.

There ain’t no way, ‘prince’ or not, that Eggsy’s going to stop being a Kingsman. That’s definitely not the way things work in the Kingsman world. And I think Vaughn is smart enough to know we would freaking riot if he even tried that. XD I mean. We talked Harry back to life from a headshot, we can talk Eggsy into still being a spy even while being a prince, haha.

That out of the way- Tilde in no way forces Eggsy to become a prince, or a ‘kept boy.’ Let’s give Eggsy more credit than that. If he didn’t want to marry Tilde, if he didn’t want to be with her, he wouldn’t. Eggsy very clearly loves her, tells her flat out that he wants to spend the rest of his life with her. And yeah, okay, becoming the future queen’s consort is probably going to cause some issues with Kingsman- but he makes that choice. Saying that Tilde forces him into it just… makes me think of the people who tried to say that Eggsy forced her to have sex with him at the end of TSS. Which, frankly, is ludicrous. At the end of TSS, Tilde is clearly very happy to propose sex with him. And at the end of TGC, Eggsy is clearly very happy to be marrying Tilde.

And that. Was a lot of tl;dr, haha. Hopefully tl;dr that makes sense, and isn’t too rambly. But. I have a hella lot of feels about this, and have put a lot of thought into it. I really love Tilde, and I have come to love her relationship with Eggsy. (And I love my poly ships that include her.) And I really would love to see more of fandom embrace her and it, but that’s of course going to be up to individual preferences. It might be some people’s NOTP, and that’s alright. I have my own NOTPs in this fandom. And you know what? I co-exist with them. I block tags and posts if I need to, and I just try not to comment on them, because live and let live. This fandom is such an open and welcoming one, and I hope it stays that way.

[two-friends-read-hp]

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

CHAPTER ONE: The Riddle House

oOOooh I wonder who lives here

Fasten your seatbelts children, it’s about to get spooky

Oh, it has been many years since the Riddle family lived there you say? Hmm, I wonder where they went and/or what happened to them…

Half a century ago?!? I forget how old Voldemort actually is sometimes

Oof they were still in their dinner things when they were murdered

Poor Frank Bryce, war really changes you… all he wanted was a quiet life

I suppose to the villagers it couldn’t have been anyone else, even if they can’t exactly prove how he did it

Wow, there’s a Great Hangleton right next to Little Hangleton? That’s nice I guess

Poor Frank

“...the Riddles all appeared to be in perfect health - apart from the fact that they were all dead.” Thank God for the autopsy lol

Even if Frank was cleared of all charges, it still sucks for him since nobody wants to interact with a potential murderer now

He did want a quiet life though, so I guess it suits him fine

Oh, other families actually moved in there? I didn’t think it would’ve been easy to find anyone to live there after a whole family was murdered under extremely mysterious circumstances, in addition to the fact that the only suspect in the case is the gardener who lives in the shed right outside

Oh, I wonder, who is the wealthy person who bought the house but doesn’t use it?

These little boys are shits! Why would it amuse anyone to see someone limping towards you to yell at you for destroying all their hard work??

Oh no Frank, don’t go into the house Frank

There are lights glimmering in the upper windows of the abandoned house?? Spoooky (Frank pls don’t go in there)

“The front door of the Riddle House bore no sign of being forced, and nor did any of the windows.” oh so this is just like the time when they found all the house’s inhabitants murdered. Fun. 

I have to say, in the movie, I had absolutely no idea what was going on here or who this man ever was… they didn’t do a very good job of telling us anything other than the fact that it was the Riddle house I think… my memory is foggy

Wow, so the dust was so thick that it muffled his footsteps

Frank no! Don’t go towards the flickering light!!

Oh eww, he drinks Nagini’s milk!! Why did this never faze me when I was younger??? I must’ve just assumed that that was such a Voldemort thing to do and moved on

And if I was Frank and I heard that something named ‘Nagini’ was exploring the house, and this ‘Nagini’ could be milked, my thoughts would be 1) Cows can’t go down the stairs so that man is lying 2) Who brings a cow with them on a journey anymore 3) If it isn’t a cow and it was able to explore the house then I better get tf out of here because I don’t really want to find out what animal this person milks

Also also, the cold high voice that made his sparse hairs stand would have been the cherry on top of the I-need-to-leave-right-this-second cupcake

Oh, also also also, I’d be wondering what kind of man this is who needs ‘feeding’ with the milk of whatever creature it is that’s exploring the house, so all in all, a very confused thought process

I still can’t believe Wormtail picked that as his nickname in school… it doesn’t even sound cool man

Oh man, I completely forgot about the Quidditch World Cup! Pretty significant things happen there too… I guess this proves I just don’t really care about quidditch all that much (not that I ever doubted it lol)

FRANK! If you suspect that they’re either spies or criminals, then MAYBE YOU SHOULD LEAVE? I suppose he hasn’t been in this kind of a situation since his war days… but didn’t he want to leave those behind?? EVEN MORE OF AN INCENTIVE TO LEAVE!

I’m sorry, I’m just apparently very emotionally invested in this man 

“‘Your Lordship is still determined, then?’ Wormtail said quietly.” Hmm… It almost sounds as if Wormtail over here is reluctant…. And scared too

Oh so, Wormtail worked up the nerve to ask if ‘it’ could be done without Harry Potter… this is probably what Dumbledore meant when he said that Wormtail would now be indebted to Harry for saving his life

I kind of believe Wormtail when he said he didn’t suggest this out of concern for Harry, he suggested it so that he wouldn’t have to feel bad himself. It would also help if they used another wizard because it would be easier to get their hands on literally any other wizard than Harry Potter

I imagine the task of ‘nursing’ Voldemort would be wearisome for everyone

DESERT HIM WORMTAIL! Also, GET OUT OF THERE FRAAAANK!

I knew it! Wormtail’s having regrets!

Voldemort’s right, Wormtail’s a coward

LOL Voldemort only needs Wormtail because ‘someone needs to milk Nagini’

Also YIKES

Oh, Voldemort has waited thirteen years to kill someone too? I know of someone you'd get along with

I’m not surprised that Voldemort knows that Wormtail is spineless

‘...one that many of my followers would give their right hands to perform…’ eyyyyyy

Lol Wormtail just keeps oscillating between sulky and terrified

If Voldemort was going to kill you, Wormtail, he wouldn’t tell you, especially not at his weakest 

Oh, you don’t like that Voldemort killed her Wormtail??? WHAT DID YOU EXPECT

I almost forgot, FRANK WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE

Ohhh ok so now that Frank heard that he’s killed someone, he decided to move… I suppose he stayed to get any information he could about these people before getting out of there and calling the authorities or getting any kind of help at all

Harry Potter is in danger? Wowee! Golly! Gosh! Gee willikers!

Oh good! He’s convinced and he’s going to the police

Snake!

I WANT FOR YOU TO BE BACK IN YOUR BED WITH YOUR HOT WATER BOTTLE TOO FRANK

He’s so brave. YOU WILL BE REMEMBERED FRANK!

FRANK DON’T TELL HIM YOU HEARD ABOUT THE MURDER! But also Frank is brave I guess, and sometimes that comes with a little stupidity

Oh, Frank, you died a brave man.

“Two hundred miles away, the boy called Harry Potter woke with a start.” Gosh what an amazing introduction, we’re back lads!

I imagine these were being written more with the movies in mind because I know that this book came out after the first movie was made… I think… that’s why there’s such a killer introduction (ba dum tss)

Chapter 2

[greerbaiting]

Okay so apparently I still had so many feelings about Roger Kaplan when I woke up, so I’m gonna make a longer post which I’m unofficially calling “Why Roger Kaplan Should Be Your New Fave” 

Okay first of all he’s just a really fun character to have in the show? Like, he’s a really great foil to Etta, and it’s so great whenever you get a chance to see them interact because it’s so clear that they both care about each other so much, they just disagree on how important work is and what Etta should be broadcasting about. They’re very different people and that may cause them to clash a lot but they still care so deeply for each other? Like I just. I want more scenes with them interacting because the scene where they’re threatening Percy and Nora with Bob is one of the best and I need more of these two working together. BUT IN A HAPPY WAY PLEASE. 

give my children a break, pls 

Honestly his relationships with all of the characters are just so amazing. Like, his friendship with Kate is so good???? The scene where she’s cheering him up with the creepy recording and talking about how the other two sometimes forget that not everyone works the same way and she’s so understanding and patient and doesn’t force him to be someone he’s not and is able to get him to come back inside by reassuring him that it’s okay. like. that scene means a lot to me, okay? And the scene at the end of episode 8 where they’re talking about how he knew that POSEIDON was coming is also so great. Like. Their friendship is amazing y’all. I need more of them being supportive and loving towards one another because they just get each other. 

Also he tells her that he’s glad she got here when she did because “the last Travel Agent, she- well it doesn’t matter now.” Like clearly he didn’t have a great relationship with the last Travel Agent and so that makes his relationship with Kate so much more meaningful???? I just. I can’t. I can’t. 

(also plus 10,000 points for The Bridge showing not just one but two strong platonic relationships between a man and a woman (Roger and Kate, Etta and Bertie). I mean I could say four because the Etta-Roger and Bertie-Kate ones are pretty great too, but it’s clear that the last two are like, best friend level, soooo) 

And his relationship with Bertie is so great too? Like, Bertie brings him yellow roses because they mean friendship. And the entire scene where they’re playing cards in episode 8? It’s so great on so many levels. First of all, Bertie’s trying so hard to take his mind off of things. He’s being so patient with Roger and calling Kate over and over again because he knows that it’ll make him feel better. Also the bit where Roger’s asking if he’s told him how he ended up on the Bridge and Bertie says that he hasn’t, he just goes “Really? I could’ve sworn someone here knows.” because if anyone there were to know it would be Bertie and I just *sharp inhale* It’s good y’all. Oh yeah, and the scripts reveal this bit of information: 

Like Bertie’s the first to get a real laugh out of Roger and I just. Hngh. Also when he asks Bertie about how he’s so calm, Bertie tells him that there’s no use in hiding his fear because it’s just them and they can talk about it if he wanted to. But he also tells him that it’s alright if he doesn’t want to talk, which is so important to hear. Like it means so much to me that there’s a character who doesn’t like talking about his feelings and the other characters are all fine with it and let him keep to himself. 

Okay so he’s got great relationships with the other characters but what about Roger’s character himself? That’s where this shit gets real because he’s just sooo good y’all. He’s so good. 

Like he loves his crew so much. He was literally prepared to either die (if he’s not immortal) or be in a shit ton of pain (if he is immortal) just to try to keep them safe. All throughout the scene where Nora stabs him you can hear his laboured breathing and it’s awful but also he was willing to go through that if it meant that Etta could get out safely. Heck, when he tells her to leave because it’s not her job to protect him Nora was still threatening to kill him. And yeah, you can say that maybe he’s immortal and so he was in no real danger of dying, but he can clearly still be injured and in pain. 

And the only reason he doesn’t tell them about POSEIDON and the danger is because he’s scared that he won’t be able to save everybody and that they won’t be able to forgive him for it. He’s so certain that at least one of them is gonna die on his watch and he doesn’t want that to happen because they all mean so much to him and it’s definitely implied that this has happened to him before with the whole “will they be able to forgive me for choosing them over their friends? You couldn’t. So why should they?” bit and he’s so guilty over it and worried that it’ll happen again. 

But his crew also love him so much???? Like they literally have one day a year where they do everything they can to try to make him smile because they want him to be happy so badly. And they think that when you’re happy you’re smiling and if you’re not smiling then you’re not happy. And yeah they go overboard a little bit but it’s so clear that they’re doing it all out of love and because they just want to see him be happy. And they back off once they realize that they’ve crossed a line and again, it’s so important that they have a character who is just allowed to not be happy all the time and be a grump and yet still gets to have all of these super meaningful relationships with everybody else in the show. 

And he’s trying his best, y’know? Like yeah, he fucks up majorly and he definitely should have told them, but he thought that he would be able to keep them safe without having to scare them with the news that their lives were in danger and there was nothing they could do about it. 

He’s also so fucking loyal to them. Like you get the sense that he would do literally anything to protect his crew and that just. it makes me emotional because I can’t stop thinking about how Polaris is coming/probably already there after that last episode and I don’t like thinking about what he might have to do to keep his crew safe. 

Also we’ve already seen some character growth from him with how he views Bob. In the first few episodes he clearly doesn’t approve of how much Etta cares for Bob and you never see him refer to Bob by name, only as “the creature” or “it.” But after their run-in with Percy and Nora he begins referring to Bob by name and saying he/him instead of it. You can see that how they talked about him really rattled him and he almost gets sort of protective towards Bob in a different way than he had before. Prior to the run-in he was protective because it was his job. “Protect the asset” and all that. But afterwards he begins to see Bob as another part of his crew that needs his protection. 

Also this boy is so soft? Like, he keeps acting like he’s super tough but he literally sings Adele songs to himself when he’s alone. And he likes rom coms (secretly). The crew also described him as a “burnt cinnamon roll” so y’know. Take from that what you will. 

His dream was to have a sheep farm and spend his life tending to a flock of sheep. Like I get so emotional every time I think about this because 1) relatable af please give me a sheep farm but also because 2) he wants it so that he can just go and be alone. Just him and the sheep. Picture it. Roger and a herd of baaing clouds. 

ALSO THIS BOY IS A MASSIVE NERD??? He’s the biggest nerd in the Watchtower apparently. A Watchtower that includes Etta Perrault and Roger has her beat for nerdiness levels. Like seriously. This boy. 

And he may or may not be immortal? And if he is, he got his immortality through LITERALLY GAMBLING WITH HIS MEMORIES. Roger. Who hurt you so bad that you were willing to give those up? Or rather, how are you that stupid? They’re your memories boy, they can’t come back. 

And if he’s not immortal then he’s just an overdramatic nerd who talks about a bet he lost constantly. 

Which isn’t that surprising because he is literally so overdramatic all the time. Like Etta literally says that he spends a lot of time muttering woe-is-me thoughts under his breath. And he has a scene that has literally been dubbed his “Emo Rain Scene.” 

He gets annoyed at himself when he accidentally makes a pun. And he at one point he literally says “Fun. If you like that sort of thing.” Like this guy is so overdramatic and so intent on being super serious all the time but also???? he just cares so much for the Watchtower crew and while sure, he doesn’t show his emotions all the time, it’s still very clear that he has them. 

And I also really like that when he tells people off for things they aren’t constantly pressing for him to apologize, even if he’s too harsh sometimes. Like he tells Bertie off for knowing about Etta’s broadcasts and while he was a little hard on him, there’s no scene where everyone’s pressuring him to apologize because they know that he was (slightly) in the right (it’s a complicated situation) even if he was a little harsh when going about it. I dunno, that just means a lot to me. 

ALSO he’s super paranoid. Like beyond just the whole “people are going to come along and take away Bob” thing. It’s canon that he sees things in the water or on the Bridge and panics about them (referenced in Mystery Science... Whatever). And I need more paranoid characters in my life. 

ALSO ALSO he’s totally fine with being the Bad Cop when he and Kate are interrogating Frank. Like he even seems happy about getting to play that role. What a dork. 

His name is Roger and everyone’s constantly making “Roger that” jokes and I love it. 

He also regularly gets beaten up/knocked out/stabbed during the course of the show. And the show’s only 10 episodes so far. He has a real knack for it, seriously. Like does he just summon the danger? Or is he throwing himself into it to protect his crew? Who even knows anymore? 

He tells people to treat guests kindly because you never know how they’ll return the favour. I still can’t decide whether or not this is adorable. 

This post is getting pretty long so I’m gonna end it here but I’m probably missing a whole bunch of stuff because just everything about Roger is incredible and he’s just so great. So so great. 

(Also Chris Martin fucking nails the voice acting. I’m just saying. Dude’s incredible.) 

Times that Jess had to stop writing because they got too emotional: 6  

[thesecondmate]

reading: wk5-6

helloooo wow it’s been a while! my absence is due to spending a week almost solid on social media promo & technical prep for my charity’s conference, which happened last weekend (feb 6-7) and which i am still in awe of. we had such an incredible range of speakers speaking on all areas of refugee & migration issues; i am so humbled to have been a part of it, and to have chaired the mental health panel with 3 doctors whose work i admire so incredibly. a true honour. discussion post pending once i get all my thoughts straight (or at least more digestible!).

anyways, readings-wise, this won’t be complete as i have a lot of stuff to read after the conference but ! u get the idea. i’m doing well on my mission to read more books, which is nice!

degree-wise, i’ve finished my orthopaedics/trauma/emergency rotation (goodbye my one true love, the resus bay!!) and am about to move onto my general practice/derm/palliative block. hyped for GP and to expand my skillset; really not hyped for derm...also lots of other tasks pending: lgbtq+ issues to work on fixing at my med school + we (medact in my local area) want to run some “patients not passports” training on the hostile environment in uk healthcare for my fellow med students, which i’m impossibly behind on the organisation for...i really lived & breathed this conference y’all. plus we’re about to start the meta-analysis portion of our systematic review, which is exciting!!! vv keen to see the results of this bad boy.

BOOKS

✩ the secret history // tartt (finished)

✩ sudden traveller // hall (in progress)

LITERATURE

✩ The Doubling of Self: An Interview with Richard Siken - Peter Mishler, Tin House from 2014. absolutely go OFF richard - this interview was beautiful. i will be re-reading. fave moments: - “It seems to me that everything in the world is actively trying to kill everything else in the world, on every level, and always has.” - “I loved it when I first discovered work that had concerns other than plot...Attention to language was important, they assured. It was electrifying.” !!!! - “I’m interested in the way we gather knowledge. The Socratic method—rhetoric: questioning and debating—has been crucial to our understanding. The scientific method—hypothesizing, testing, measuring—has also been crucial. And then there’s the artistic method—evoking, provoking, suggesting—which is just as crucial but consistently underused. These are both the modes, as well as the subjects, of the poems.” i’m so emo....richard!!!

ARTICLES: WORLD NEWS i’ve read a huge number of articles on us politics, covid vaccines, and covid drugs; i will not subject myself to writing them all out lol.

✩ Covid: We could live with virus 'like we do flu' by end of year, says Hancock - BBC i agree that covid-zero is not feasible, especially when our govt has so roundly fucked up our response; i can imagine this is not going to be a popular take but i feel like people also do not realise just how many deaths we have from influenza each year in the uk. the new data for tocilizumab are really interesting, as is 14 million people vaccinated - progress! now just to get everyone jabbed before the damn thing mutates thanks to the selection pressure of the vaccine!!

MEDICINE similarly i’m not going to list all the stuff i’ve read about covid vaccines; suffice to say i’ve read a lot!

✩ 10 steps before you refer for palpitations - Wolff & Cowan (2009) this made me smile: “This symptom [palpitations] often causes considerable distress and anxiety for the patient and can evoke a similar feeling in the consulted healthcare professional.”

✩ An Italian doctor explains “Syndrome K,” the fake disease he invented to save Jews from the Nazis - Caitlin Hu, Quartz this gave me chills - stories like this about healthcare professionals always do. i hope fervently that i would do the same for my patients if it came to it.

✩ Inflammation and immunity in schizophrenia: implications for pathophysiology and treatment - Khandaker et al. (2015), The Lancet Psychiatry so so interested in this field. this is what made me consider psychiatry seriously back in first year of med school (previously i ruled it out due to my constitution).

✩ Schizophrenia risk from complex variation of complement component 4 - Sekar et al. (2016), Nature

✩ Control of infectious diseases in refugee and displaced populations in developing countries - Paquet & Hanquet (1998), Bulletin de l’Institut Pasteur i wrote up a post on refugees/asylum seekers and the myth that they bring infectious diseases into countries, hence all the refs!

✩ Do migrants have a mortality advantage? - Borhade & Dey (2018), The Lancet

✩ Migrant Mortality, Healthy Migrant Effect - Razum (2008)

✩ Poorer self-perceived health among migrants and ethnic minorities versus the majority population in Europe: a systematic review - Nielsen & Krasnik (2010), Int J Public Health

OP-ED/ESSAY & HUMANITARIAN

✩ What a picture of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in a bikini tells us about the disturbing future of AI - Arwa Mahdawi, Guardian

✩ Becoming Anne Frank - Dara Horn, Smithsonian Mag

✩ Yemen’s Houthis – and why they’re not simply a proxy of Iran - Vincent Durac, The Conversation vv interesting!! a must-read given the current media framing of the yemeni crisis.

✩ Ten humanitarian crises and trends to watch in 2021 - New Humanitarian really great article - lots of links to read!

✩ Snatched from a beach to train North Korea's spies - Rebecca Seales & Hideharu Tamura, BBC i cried reading this.

✩ Biden cancels Houthi terror designation, restoring Yemen aid - Reuters via the Guardian

✩ Yemenis give cautious welcome to US shift in policy on conflict - Bethan McKernan, Guardian initially i was v positive on reading this headline; however, the US won’t end ‘defensive support’ for riyadh, which...how much will materially change. i really really hope a lot, but they really need to end defensive support too bc otherwise i believe that many more attacks by the saudi-led coalition will be construed as ‘defensive’ moves rather than offensive! also, wtf @ uk govt: step the fuck up and do the same.

✩ Colombia Makes ‘Historic’ Decision to Grant Legal Status to 1.7 Million Venezuelan Migrants - Julie Turkewitz, New York Times

PODCASTS/TV i have consumed relatively little tv this week!

✩ Declarations: The Human Rights Podcast have been listening to quite a lot of this over the last week - a speaker at our conference was v involved in this. a lot of interesting viewpoints - cannot recommend chase madar’s episode enough. i’m in love. obsessed. finally someone as cynical and as focused on the raw compassion of human rights as opposed to their legality/sexy foreign policy aspect as me!! marry me @ mr madar pls.