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munsonsreputation · 2 years

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Soon You'll Get Better

Chapter One: Doctor's-Office-Lighting

↢ prologue | series masterlist | chapter two ↣

summary: revelations of max's mental and emotional health come to light when you and steve take her to a check-up. determined to do whatever you can to help her, you and steve work on getting her to open up about her life. max comes to realize that the support is genuine and that she isn't alone, whether if it's about her state of mind or relationship.

word count: [12.2k] kinda proof-read

: ̗̀➛ pairings: big-brother!steve x max & big-sister!reader x max

: ̗̀➛ romantic pairing: steve harrington x fem-college-student!reader

: ̗̀➛ warnings: talks about mental and emotional health, billy's death, self isolation, panic attack, crying, talks about attempted sewerslide (max almost says it, but steve stops her), mentions of breakups, overall a lot of fluff despite the angst.

With the sun beaming down at Hawkins and the skin tickling breeze passing by, it would’ve seemed as though nothing bad had ever happened in this small town, but that would be far from the truth.

Max hadn’t felt the warm enveloping blanket of the sun and the gust of wind against her skin in days. Instead, she spent the dwindling hours of summer locked in the trailer, watching the same VHS tape on repeat like background noise while she paced back and forth cleaning up the pile of messes and lost in her own thoughts.

The only time the depths of misery in her mind paused was when the telephone rang. She would stare at, contemplating on answering, but just being too drained to even reach it or utter a single world. Her best friend El, leaving countless of voicemails asking when she would like to hangout next or simply if she was ok.

She didn’t like worrying El. It wasn’t her fault that she was feeling like this. At the end of the day, it was no one’s fault. But shutting people out just seemed to be her default way of dealing with everything, especially something like this.

“Max, honey,” A few more knocks tapped on her door. For once her mother was home, but spent the day figuring out payments with the bank and handling a bunch of adult shit that she was too far to care about.

The young girl sighed, kicking off her blankets, and staring up at the ceiling. One. Two. Three seconds before she mustered the energy to get up and open the door. “What’s up?”

Her mom looked over behind her shoulder, then back at her daughter, “Your friend El is here. She’s worried about you.”

Max brushed past her mom, heading straight down the narrow hallway of the trailer until she saw her best friend along with Steve and you, his girlfriend, on either side of her.

“Hey—” She couldn’t even get the whole greeting out before El had stepped forward and bound her arms securely around her best friend, a sigh of happiness leaving her mouth.

Slowly, Max hugged her back, not knowing that El was this concerned about her and if she had known that her best friend was going to show up unannounced like this, she would have picked up the last seven calls she had missed.

“Why haven’t you picked up my calls?” El wondered, pulling away and observing the features on Max’s face that seemed to have dulled.

The apparent bags under her eyes, a tell-tale sign that Max had not been getting enough sleep and was fatigued.

“Busy doing chores, I’m sorry, El.” Max felt terrible, she didn’t mean to treat her friend like this, let alone make her worry so much, but El just gave her a reassuring smile and shook her head mouthing, “It’s ok.”

“Did you ask them to drive you here?” She looked at you and Steve as you two nodded, him stepping forward first to give her a hug.

Max didn’t share many hugs with Steve, but today she granted him one knowing he took the time out of his day to drive here, “She was worried, which then made us worry, so we wanted to come here to make sure you were alright.”

When he pulled away, he took notice of the way Max forced a laugh just as quickly as it died in her throat when you stepped forward and hugged her strongly.

“Are you doing ok, sweetheart?” You inquired softly against her hair, and she only replied with a “yes,” before you had nodded and pulled away, not wanting to poke and prode.

It wasn’t long before her mother came back into view, resting a hand on Max’s shoulder and smiling at you three. You could tell she was worn out, the same way Max was. But the only difference was that her mother was good at trying to hide it. Meanwhile Max tried to, but the discomfort on her face said it all.

“I actually wanted to ask a favor from you two if that’s ok?”

Max glanced behind at her mom, raising a brow, but she squeezed her shoulder warmly, “Max, why don’t you invite El in for a little bit? I just need a word with these two, ok?”

She wanted to ask why, but not wanting to make the situation sticky, she grabbed onto El’s hand and led her inside of the trailer and towards her room where they could catch up in private.

Her mom stepped outside, closing the door behind her and smiling at you two, “I just hope this isn’t too much to ask, but, Max actually has a check up tomorrow morning, but I can’t take her because I’ll be working.”

You and Steve’s eyes caught the way her fingers fidgeted against one another, a distinct perception of stress and anxiety, just because of her asking for the favor.

“We could totally take her!” You chirped, taking away the embarrassment she had felt for asking such a favor from some teens.

Steve nodded, wrapping his arms over your shoulder and pulling your side into him, “Yeah, the two of us are both off, so it should be no problem.”

Her mom shifted eye contact between you both, “Are you sure it ok? The appointment is at nine, but I could reschedule it if that’s too early.”

You shook your head, looking over at Steve with a smile, “We’re usually up before then, so nine is perfect.”

When you looked back at her, she was more than relieved, placing a hand over her heart gratefully.

“Thank you! I would send Max there herself, but they need someone over eighteen to be with her in case, and I know she really trusts you two the most.”

Max wasn’t always particularly close to you and Steve, but as she had caught more rides from you both, she had warmed up to you two out of all the older teens.

“We’d be happy to take her. Do you have the address by any chance?” Steve sought before Max’s mom nodded, gesturing back inside the trailer.

“I’ll go write it down and I’ll be back out.”

You watched as she hurried back inside, leaving you and Steve there waiting.

“Maybe we could stop by a little cafe and get her some breakfast before we pick her up?” You suggested, leaning your head on his shoulder.

He kissed the top of your head first, “I’ll need a coffee. Do we really look like we’re the type of people to be up by nine in the morning?” Steve half joked with a short laugh.

You snorted, nudging him softly. “I didn’t want to make her feel bad…if this is the least we can do to help them, we can sacrifice a few hours of sleep.”

“I know, I know, you’re right.” He apologized, resting his chin on top of your head while they waited around for a couple of minutes before her mom and the two girls had come emerging from the door.

You reached for the small piece of paper with the scribbling of the address written on it with a faded blue ink that was still readable. Steve took it from you when you passed it to him, placing it in his jean pocket and creating a mental note to not forget it was there.

“Do you think I can stay for dinner?” El requested kindly towards you two, who were just offered to stay a little longer by Max’s mom.

Steve hummed, checking the time on his watch, but sadly shaking his head when he saw the time, “Sorry, El, we promised Hop we’d have you home by five remember?”

She pouted nevertheless, but smiled when Max hugged her and told her that it was ok.

“Maybe tomorrow you can head over to Will and El’s after your appointment?” Her mom suggested, “But you’ll have to ask her and Steve for a ride since they’re taking you tomorrow.”

The redhead grumbled, pulling away from her friend and looking at her mom begrudgingly, “Can’t we reschedule?”

Her mom shook her head, taking a deep breath. “You’ll need to go, Maxine. My insurance plan finally is in effect and it’s covering all our medical expenses, thank god.”

“Fine.” She puffed, crossing her arms over her chest a clear sign that she did in fact not want to step foot into any doctor’s office whatsoever.

“C’mon, hon, let’s get you back home before your dad freaks.” You smiled delicately, reaching a hand out for El who took it, and stood by your side.

Steve pointed at Max, a small smile on his face, “We’ll see you tomorrow morning, alright?”

Max just nodded, forcing a smile as she watched the three of you get into the car with El in the backseat, waving goodbye to her best friend as they drove off into the late afternoon.

“Maxine, I know you’re upset.” Her mother spoke apologetically, resting a hand on the small of her daughter’s back, guiding her back into their home.

She moved away from her mother’s hand, settling onto the couch to bring her knees up to her chest, “I just don’t understand why you can’t take me? Can’t you just go to work late?” she argued.

Her mom sighed heavily, grabbing dishes from the small cabinet and placing them down on the even smaller corner table of the trailer, “Honey, we’ve been through this a million times.”

Max rolled her eyes, the script she had memorized time and time again flowing out of her mouth before her mom had anytime to beat her to it, “Going in late means missing hours which means less money, which means no food, no electricity, no money, no rent, no home.”

Her mother took a deep breath in and out, approaching Max and kneeling at her side. “I’m sorry, Max. You know I have to do this for you.”

“Yeah, I know, it’s whatever.” Max brushed off, resting a heavy head on her kneecaps with an unsatisfied frown.

With the windows rolled down, El relaxed in the soft leather seats of Steve’s BMW. The only sounds were the soft hum of the icy cold air conditioning cooling the hot air and whatever that was on the radio playing faintly.

“You ok back there?” Steve said, looking into the rear-view mirror catching the sight of the young girl who wrenched her shoulders.

You turned back and gave her a one over. The pout was still on her face and now her arms crossed like Max had hers a few minutes ago, “What’s the matter, hon?”

“Max….she is sad.” She told you two obviously.

Steve pursed his lips, glancing quickly behind at her, “Did she tell you that?”

She shook her head, but spoke, “I know she is. When I asked if she was ok, she didn’t answer.”

“I’m sure she just wants some time to herself,” you assured her. “Her and her mom are still trying to adjust to life without Billy and his dad around.”

It had been a little over a year since the battle at Star Court where Billy had sacrificed himself to the mind-flayer in order to save Eleven’s life. You and Steve could still recall the memory vividly. How you two watched from the second story of the mall where you two had been throwing fireworks alongside Lucas and Max in order to deter the monster.

Yet it all happened so quickly, Billy putting himself in between El and the mind-flayer, before getting brutally wounded by the creature and the blood oozing through his white wife-beater and splattering in the air.

Max couldn’t believe her eyes, dashing down the stalled escalator stairs and dropping to her knees beside her slain brother. His eyes blanking out and only a few words escaping his mouth before he had died. She was in shambles, shaking him, screaming at him to wake up, but he had accepted his fate.

You and Steve had rushed down the same steps, nearing the two girls who had been weeping. El had pulled Max into arms, letting her cry there, and shielding her eyes from her brother who was bleeding out in front of them.

“I’ve got Max.” Steve declared, running up to the girls and guiding Max out of Eleven’s hold and into his arms where he led her outside of the mall.

El had immediately sprung to you, crying into your shoulder as you walked the two of you behind Steve and Max as the sirens resounded through the air.

Ambulances, firetrucks, and military vehicles overflowed the mall parking lot as they all hastily assessed the well-beings of the children first.

Hopper had found El in the back of an ambulance, the scar on her forehead being dealt with before he embraced her in a tight hug.

Nancy wrapped a blanket across the shoulders of her brother Mike, rubbing her hands and down his shoulders to create warmth.

Lucas and Erica ran to their parents as soon as they saw them stopped at the bright yellow caution tape, baring them off from seeing their kids.

She watched as everyone reunited with their family while she had no one waiting for her. But you and Steve, stuck by her side in the back of the ambulance, letting her rest her head on Steve’s shoulder while you soothed her.

Steve shook his head at the horrible remembrance, thankful that the worst was over and finally everyone in Hawkins could live in peace away from all that supernatural shit. He had you and his friends, something he was grateful for, but a part of him still felt the heaviness of it all, especially for the young girl Max who never seemed to fully recover from the year ago attack.

“I’ll tell you what,” Steve started, catching El’s eyes in the rearview again, “If she’s up for it, we’ll swing by tomorrow and take you guys to the arcade.”

El erupted at that, smiling broadly with an excited nod which made you laugh, hopeful that Max would feel a little better and would want to have some fun with her best friend that missed her greatly.

The next morning, Max was out of bed earlier than usual not wanting you two to wait around for her if you two were to show up earlier. She had gotten dressed in her usual baggy jeans, a stripped t-shirt and Billy’s oversized jean jacket to go over it.

A note hanging on the refrigerator read, “Have a good day, Max…Mom loves you, always!” She left it hanging there, switching on the TV while she waited.

When a soft knock followed by her name, came against the door, she knew you two had arrived. The clock on the stove read 7:15 just a few minutes early. She promptly grabbed her keys and her walkman, hooking it onto her jeans and opening the door.

“Morning sunshine.” You radiated against the morning sunlight, holding out a small cup of hot cocoa and a breakfast sandwich for her.

She actually smiled a little, locking the door before taking the items from you as you both walked the short distance to the car where Steve had been waiting in the driver’s seat.

“Hey Max, the cocoa good?” Steve turned, watching the young girl open the door as she took a sip of her drink.

She hummed warmly, and you shut her door before getting into the passenger, “I told him you were more of a latte type but he supposes that sixteen-year-olds shouldn’t be drinking coffee.”

Steve rolled his eyes, picking up his now empty cup of black coffee, and shaking it side to side, “Kids shouldn’t be drinking this shit.”

“So you’re calling yourself old?” Max proposed, opening up her bacon, egg, and cheese taking a bite.

“I think he is.” You tormented, jabbing at Steve’s side while he fussed and Max snorted quietly at the scene.

You and Steve looked so happy—not only as a couple, but just as humans.

For the most part, you all had gone through the same things last summer—except you and Steve were locked in the Russian base while Max and the others dealt with the mind-flayer stuff. Nevertheless, the anguish and memories of what had happened all remained the same throughout their group of friends, yet everyone else seemed to get over the hump of what happened.

Everyone except her.

She wanted to be happy again. Happy with herself. With her friends. With her boyfriend. With life. But everything just seemed as though it wouldn’t pass.

The sadness, the guilt, the nightmares would never be something she would be able to escape.

As you drove to the doctor’s office, you tried to make small talk with Max, asking her about what she had been up to lately. She gave short, one-word answers, and you could tell that she was still feeling down just like yesterday. Steve remembered what El had told them about Max being unhappy and decided to try to see if he could get her to open up.

“Max, is everything okay?” Steve finally asked, breaking the silence that passed after a couple of minutes.

Max shrugged, staring out the window of passing buildings and slower cars, “Just tired, I guess.”

You exchanged a worried peek with Steve, but didn’t push her to talk. It would only make her more uncomfortable and irritable, something you both wanted to avoid.

The doctor’s office was a small clinic a little further into town, nevertheless you three were on time, avoiding the morning bustle of traffic on this Friday. Steve greeted the woman at the front desk, checking Max in while she helped you fill out the necessary forms.

“Maxine Mayfield?” A nurse called out as she walked into the waiting room.

You patted Max on the shoulder, giving her an encouraging smile. “Just call out if you need us, ok?”

“I will.” She assured you, following the nurse into the exam room.

The appointment wasn’t anything special, just a yearly exam to make sure everything was going smoothly with Max’s health. They checked her ears, eyes, reflexes, and asked her a few questions.

“One last thing,” the nurse smiled, putting down her stethoscope and grabbing the clipboard and pen resting on the counter, “This is just a short questionnaire I need you to fill out. I’ll leave the room and give you a few minutes ok?”

Max nodded, grabbing the clip board and begun filling out the form. Reading the questions in her head and thinking for a few seconds before appropriately determine where she fell in each of the boxes. After ten minutes, the nurse came back, collecting the form and allowing her to head back into the waiting room while the doctor reviewed the report.

Steve sat up when he saw her emerge from the doors. He recognized the jean jacket to be Billy’s, practically too big and swallowing Max up whole. “How was it?”

Her pointer and middle finger gestured to her eyes then back at him, “I still have 20/20 vision and impeccable hearing.”

“That’s what we like to hear.” You grinned, patting a chair between you and Steve so she could sit awhile until she’d be seen by the doctors and discharged.

The waiting room was quiet. Just the small talk of the receptionists and replay of I Love Lucy playing through the TV filled the comfy space. You conversed with her for a short while, talking about the Kate Bush tape she had in her walkman. She let you have a listen to her favorite track, “Running Up That Hill,” telling you about the meaning of the song before her name was called, prompting you to take off the headphones.

“Guardians of Maxine Mayfield?” The doctor wore the typical white coat with a stethoscope cloaked over her neck and a clipboard in hand with Max’s files.

“Here.” Steve stood up, and the doctor smiled, nodding her head gesturing for you and Max to come along into her office.

“Are you her brother?” She called for, holding the door open to a small room.

Steve looked at Max unsure of how she wanted him to answer that, and the redhead shrugged, “Something like that.”

The doctor chuckled, offering you three a seat in front of her desk. Max sat in the middle with you and Steve on either side of her.

She glanced through the documents once more, and nodded to herself before looking at you two, “Everything seems to be looking good with her physical health. She did great on the vision exam and even better on the hearing test.”

Max smirked, nudging both you and Steve with her elbow. “Told you so.”

The doctor looked over the last page of the clipboard, the questionnaire that Max had filled out moments ago, all indicating worry, “But we do have an area of concern when it comes to her mental and emotional wellbeing.”

Max could feel the space suddenly become thicker, all eyes shifting towards her and the painful quietness lingering as you all expected her to say something, but she didn’t. She didn’t want to admit that there was something obviously going on in her life that she had been hiding, but now was eating her alive.

Steve coughed, tearing his eyes away from a very uncomfortable Max and looking at the professional, “W-what’s the matter?”

She pulled off one of the pages, and slid it towards him, “On a scale of zero to five, five being everyday, have you been feeling down, depressed, irritable or hopeless? She checked off five.”

You gulped, looking at Max who now seemed to be burying her head in her shoulder, looking towards the door closest to Steve.

“Max, do you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head, her shoulders sulking deeper, “It’s nothing. Everyone feels like that sometimes. It passes. Normal teenage shit.”

“Hey,” Steve pointed, shaking his head at the explicative, “language.”

The doctor shook her head, understandingly, “No, it’s okay. Max, these feelings your having isn’t normal. I know it may seem like it, but if you’re constantly feeling bad about yourself everyday, then it may be a bigger issue.”

She reached for a pamphlet in her desk drawer, gliding it towards Max who finally peered at it. A girl crying in bed on the front page, with some sort of statistic in bold font above.

“Most teenage girls your age are more likely to develop depression and anxiety, especially if there are contributing factors like bullying, isolation, a rocky home life—”

Max snapped her head, suddently triggered and fed up with the conversation, “Nothing is wrong with me!”

Your eyes enlarged, attempting to soothe her with a touch of your hand on hers, “Max, hey, c’mon—”

She recoiled, retreating from your hand, “No!” she shouted, standing up, directing her anger towards the doctor in front of her who didn’t take the outburst personally, knowing there had to be an underlying issue.

“You don’t know what I’m feeling. You don’t know my life. You don’t know a damn thing about me or my family.”

With that, her feet thudded against the floors, tearing the doctor’s office door open and hurling it shut. She didn’t care about the stares she got from the other patients in the waiting room and the receptionists calling out for her—she wanted one thing and it was to get the hell out of that place.

You and Steve had never witnessed a frenzy like this from Max. It was out of character for her to take help defensively. She obviously had her guard up for a reason, but you two had no clue what it was about.

Steve only glanced at you once, before he was following behind her. “I’ll check on her.” You nodded, remaining in your seat as you shot the doctor an apologetic look that she lifted.

“I want Max to know that I’m here to help, not to judge her. Her answers to the questionnaire is extremely concerning. Do you maybe have any clue as to what might be causing these feelings?” She asked you and your thoughts for a moment, shrugging your shoulders.

“I mean,” you gulped, “s-she lost her brother over a year ago, but she hasn’t really opened up about it too much to know.”

The doctor nodded, reaching for another pamphlet and passing it to you, “That could be it. Especially for girls her age, it can be hard to talk about what they’re feeling. All of these emotions she’s been dealing with could be starting to build up and bubble over.”

You took a deep breath, nodding, trying to process what had just happened and what were the next steps to helping Max. Telling her mom would probably make her more upset, yet you didn’t know if it was right for you and Steve to keep it a secret.

Steve raced out the clinic doors before it could close shut and Max was even faster darting towards his car, tugging on the door to try to hide away in the backseat, as if she wasn’t going home with either of them seeing her breakdown.

“Max! Stop!” Steve pursued, clutching her shoulder tenderly, to try to get her to look back at him.

Through the reflection of the glass window he could see her scrunched face, reddening cheeks with tears pushing past the brink of her eyelids where they tumbled down. Her chest heaved up and down heavily as her fingertips tightened around the door handle, still trying to tug it open.

“O-open the door, Steve.” She choked, pushing her shoulders back to try to get his touch off of her, which he complied with, dropping his hands from her shoulder, but never opening the car doors.

He sighed, moving beside her, stooping down a bit to look at her.

“I’m not opening the door until you talk.”

She shook her head, fingers wiping her cheeks when she finally met his eyes that were full of concern, “T-talk about what! How f-fucked up my life is? Is that what you wanna hear?”

Steve swallowed thickly, shaking his head with immediate regret. That wasn’t what he wanted. For her to think he pitied her or wanted to force her to open up. He just wanted to be let in, to know why she was feeling like this and why she hadn’t asked for help sooner.

Her eyes kept on him, the tears never stopping their journey down her cheeks. Her jaw trembling as she started to speak once more.

“God, Steve, I mean, isn’t it obvious that my life is total s-shit? I don’t need a doctor to tell me that I’m fucking sad! I already know that! She doesn’t think that I already know that I’ve contemplated to—”

He didn’t let her finish her sentence, “Hey, hey, c’mon,” smoothly guiding her head to his chest where she ultimately ceased talking and open mouth sobs left her instead. She let herself fall into Steve’s hold, her finger tips falling from the car door and instead clinging around Steve like an anchor, which would be the only thing to keep her from floating away.

Her sobs grew louder by the second, every single suppressed emotion she had been bottling up inside of her finally overflowing into tears that now drenched Steve’s polo. But Steve didn’t mind at all, holding her tighter as he closed his eyes tightly and begun whispering soft words of reassurance to her.

As you tightly held onto the pamphlets the doctor had given you; you pushed open the doors of the clinic, instantly met with the scene of Max in Steve’s arms. Your heart sank, quickening the pace of your footsteps as you shoved the papers into the back pocket of your jeans.

When Steve had finally opened his eyes, with his arms still engulfed around the young girl he held, he saw you, face full of concern as he mouthed, “she’s not ok.”

You winced, nodding your head, still calmly approaching as you placed a loving hand on her shoulder. “Hey, I’m here.”

She slowly retracted her face from Steve’s chest to look at you. Her features were twisted in heartache—brows furrowed and the tears streaming down her face, leaving a trail of wetness in their wake. Her lips quivered as she tried to catch her breath to speak to you, yet she couldn’t.

Instead, she unwrapped herself from Steve, hurrying into your arms where you immediately wrapped your arms around her securely.

“Shhh, I’m right here, sweetheart. It’s gonna be ok, ok?”

You held her close, clinging to her shaking body with each sob she took, rubbing her back gently and offering her the comfort she desperately needed. Steve watched the scene unfold, his own eyes filled with tears and without hesitation, he moved closer to both of you, wrapping his arms around you and Max.

Together, the three of you stood there in silence, holding onto each other as if your lives depended on it. Max continued to cry, but her sobs grew weaker as the moments passed. The only sounds in the car were the occasional sniffle or hiccup as she worked to regain control of her emotions.

When she finally did begin to pull back, Steve immediately let go, as did you, watching her concerningly as she mopped her tears with the back of her hand as she asked, “can we g-go home?”

“Of course.” Steve nodded firmly, finally opening the back door where he let her get in first.

You quickly got into the passenger seat, rummaging through the glove box where extra napkins were kept, and you passed her a few to dry her tears with and she let out a quiet, “thank you.”

The drive home from the doctor’s office was subdued, the only sounds in the car the soft hum of the engine and Max’s occasional sniffle. You and Steve exchanged worried glances, both of you unsure of how to help Max in her current state, but still determined to, nevertheless.

When you three finally pulled into the trailer park, you’d fully expected for Max to wave her goodbye and let that be the end, but instead she invited you inside.

The trailer was clean and tidy, not a single pile of mess could be found in the space, but it was mostly because Max had spent all her days in here trying to use up her time in any way shape or form that didn’t deal with facing anyone.

“Do you want me to make you some lunch?” You offered politely, shrugging off your jacket and slinging it over one of the kitchen chairs.

Max went over to the small sofa into the middle of the living room, shrugging her shoulders as she pulled Billy’s jean jacket over her body like a blanket.

“There’s some crackers and peanut butter in the pantry. That’ll be ok for me.” She said, and you nodded, grabbing a plate and butter knife from the dish rack and heading for the pantry.

Steve sat on the other side of Max, still placid as he wanted to wait for you before talking to Max about the events that just unfolded. After a few minutes, you returned with a plate of crackers and a small dish of peanut butter on the side. You offered it to Max, and she happily took it, beginning to munch down on the snack.

You looked at Steve, his eyes silently telling you whether it was ok for him to speak about everything and you nodded lightly, just enough for him to see.

“Max, uh, do you wanna maybe talk about how you’ve been feeling?” He proposed, resting his elbows on his knees, watching her chew her last bites before she swallowed and shrugged.

She was hesitant to open up. She had never really told anyone at all about how she was really feeling inside. It wasn’t something that she normally talked about…her feelings that is. She thought it was just better to suppress everything, but today was the breaking point and she knew that it was time.

“Sometimes, I feel so lonely,” Max expressed, her voice barely above a whisper. “I know I have you guys a-and my friends, but sometimes it feels like nobody understands what I’m going through.”

The pain she felt. The loss. The sadness. The guilt. That’s what nobody knew she was going through.

Steve reached over and placed a comforting hand on Max’s shoulder. “We may not know exactly what you’re feeling, Max, but we’re here for you. Always.”

Max nodded, her eyes misting over with tears as she felt comfortable to say a little more. “It’s just that...I’ve been feeling so guilty lately,” she continued, her voice trembling. “About Billy’s death. Like it’s my fault somehow.”

Her eyes finally turned to yours, first, ocean blue orbs looked like a flood of waves crashing with the tears beginning to form.

Then her head turned to Steve, blinking where the salty tears leaked again, “I-I just keep picturing his face. The…the blood. E-everything comes back to me and I can’t escape it.”

The words poured out of her in a rush while you and Steve listened attentively. Distress coating both of your gazes as you watched Max’s tears begin to pour quicker, her voice nearly breaking, and her hands shaking as she went on.

“M-maybe if he was here, then I wouldn’t feel this way, but…but I know that I can’t do anything. And I hate it! I hate that I can’t do a-anything about it!”

Steve could see the panic rising in Max’s eyes, and you both knew what was coming. Sure enough, a moment later, Max let out a strangled sob and clutched at her chest, her breathing ragged.

And so Steve quickly got up, stretching towards the kitchen for a glass of cold water while you scooched closer to Max, holding her hands in your palms and soothing your thumbs over her shaky knuckles.

“Hey, take a deep breath for me, Max,” You guided, breathing along with her as she kept her eyes on you and followed your directions.

In and out. Breathe. In and out. Breathe.

The cold condensation from the glass cup dripped on top of your hands where Steve was holding the glass above. Max instantly reached for the cup, gradually gulping down the ice cold water every so often as she continued the breathing routines.

Steve remained standing in front of you two, ready to spring into action if Max needed to be rushed to the hospital or anything like that, but thankfully she began to calm down, handing the cup back to Steve once she had finished it.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered shaking her head, annoyed at herself for not having any control over her emotions that she had to act out like that, “I didn’t mean to freak out like that.”

You and Steve both shook your heads, him moving to take his place back on the couch beside her, “Don’t apologize, Max…sometimes it happens. Nothing wrong with that.”

You nodded in agreement, slinging one of your arms across her shoulder while the other rested on her knee, “We’re here for you, alright? You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Max didn’t know how to react. She wasn’t used to this level of sympathy, or at least not since she was a younger child. Nowadays, her mother didn’t have much time to comfort her like she used to. Instead, she settled for simple phrases like, “It’s just in your head Maxine,” or “You’re just having one of those days, it’ll get better.”

A part of her, missed the comforting talks and hugs that she and her mom used to share, but she knew that it was a part of growing up and getting older.

She wasn’t expecting to be coddled all her life, but it was nice having you and Steve around to make her feel assured. To know that you both were actually here for her and trying your best to understand where she was coming from and all of her feelings rather than brushing it off.

“Thanks for being here.” Max spoke gratefully, reaching either of her hands out around both of your shoulders and pulling you in for a squeeze.

Steve let out a small puff of relieved air from his mouth along with a, “Yep,” while you leaned in and hugged her closer, kissing her temple before pulling away.

“Why don’t we go to the arcade?” Steve suggested, knowing that it would be a good opportunity to get some of the heavier things off of Max’s mind especially after the eventful morning you all had.

You nodded, nudging the young girl slightly. “I’m sure El would like to hang out, right?”

She sniffled, nodding her head as she sat back against the cushions and your arm, “Yeah, she did tell me she misses me a lot…I miss her too.”

The three of you spent a few more minutes on the couch, just sitting and talking about what games she wanted to play at the arcade after not being there for a couple of days. After Max finally settled completely, she called El and invited her to the arcade, even Will, but he was busy working on a new painting but offered to come next time around.

The car was now filled with music as the four of you drove to the arcade. Steve seemed to sneak more glances at the backseat through the rear-view mirror. A smile on his face as he saw Max loosening up with the presence of her best friend while they softly sung to the radio and talked amongst themselves.

Once you finally arrived at the arcade, Max seemed to feel a lot better already, laughing and screeching excitedly as she and El played their favorite games while you and Steve stood off to the side in order to give them some space.

“Max looks like she’s having fun.” You nudged Steve playfully, watching the way his face lit up, knowing his idea was so far working.

He grinned sneaking his arms around your waist to pull you closer.

“She deserves to have some fun. She’s been through a lot today…and god knows for how long.” he sighed sadly, resting his head on top of yours.

You understood how Steve felt—if only you two had known what was going on with Max sooner, maybe then you’d both would be able to help her earlier. Yet you knew there was no use in regretting the past but just hopeful for what was to come.

“C’mon, I think I want that pink unicorn.” You dragged him towards the claw machine on the other side of the arcade, still in view of the girls to keep an eye on them.

Max and El continued to compete the high score on Pac-Mac while you and Steve took turns at the claw machine trying to win the fluffy bright pink plush you wanted. After a many tries, Steve was successful, happily presenting you with it and you thanked him with a kiss.

“I think we have a winner!” Steve whistled, strolling behind Max and El with two other plushes in his hand that he had won after a few more attempts.

They turned around, smiling as they each reached for one. El picked the baby elephant and Max got the koala bear. Each of them satisfied with their gifts as they laughed and thanked Steve with smiles.

“We gotta get you girls home.” He announced, looking at his watch for the time, followed by some whines that were quickly eased away by you.

“In a few days we can give you two a ride here again, alright? Steve has work tomorrow and y’know how he is about his sleep.” You smirked, squeezing Steve’s cheeks as he groaned but leaned back into you.

“Oh, we know! Remember that time you fell asleep, and we drew a mustache on you?” El piqued enthusiastically, causing you and Max to laugh out loud.

Steve glared, reminiscing of how he volunteered to host movie night at his place for the kids only for them to grab the markers and begin doodling all over his face. He only realized it the next morning when you popped in with breakfast and couldn’t stop laughing when he greeted you at the door.

“Yeah, yeah, c’mon you twerps.”

El was the first one to get dropped off, already wistful about having to leave her best friend, yet excited for the upcoming plans to come. As you and Steve drove back to the trailer park, Max sat quietly in the backseat, fiddling with her stuffed animal and lost in her thoughts.

Today felt like one of the most relaxing days she had in a long time, despite how the morning had started off. It was nice being able to be consoled and not having to feel like her feelings were such a bad thing. She wanted this feeling to last, but she knew today would eventually come to an end.

When Steve finally pulled up in front of her trailer, her mom’s car was already parked in the grassy space, indicating she was home from a long day of work.

He turned around to face her, watching her unbuckle her seatbelt, “We had a great time, Max.”

Max gave him a smile in return, wiggling the plush he had won her today, “Thanks for taking me…it means a lot.” she said quietly.

“Of course, sweetheart,” you said kindly, maneuvering in your chair to face her as well, “We’re always here for you.”

For her. Always there for her. You two.

The words itself were like a warm embrace to Max’s cold soul that filled her with comfort and security. Just like the hug that you three shared earlier in the day in the doctor’s office parking lot. You two had no idea how much that hug meant to her. How nice and safe it was to feel like she was protected, to feel like she was heard and listened to instead of interrogated and shunned.

Max nodded, her eyes filling with tears. “I know,” she said, her voice breaking. “And I appreciate it so much. Especially with everything that’s been going on lately.”

You and Steve exchanged another set of concerned looks that was familiar from this morning, but you two knew you wanted to do everything you could to support Max through what she was going through.

“Max, we’re here for you no matter what,” Steve said firmly. “You can call us anytime if you need to talk or help with anything, alright?”

Max nodded, sniffling as she wiped her tears away, pushing a smile onto her face, “Thank you,” she said softly. “And thank you for taking me to my appointment. It means a lot.”

Steve smiled reassuringly. “Of course, Max. We’re happy to help.”

As she gathered the rest of her belonging, ready to exit the car and call it a day, she turned back to you and Steve, “Can we do this again soon?” she asked hopefully, her voice filled with need. “I had a lot of fun today.”

You and Steve grinned, nodding your heads as Steve reached out to ruffle her hair, making her laugh freely.

“Absolutely, I’ll give you a call tomorrow and let you know when Steve is off next.” You told her, and she beamed with excitement as she got of the car.

“Thanks…I’ll see you guys soon!” she said, closing the door behind her as she got out.

She waited there to watch you both drive off, waving goodbye as you and Steve watched her in the rearview until she was out of sight into the afternoon sunset.

The car ride was quiet, the both of you not wanting to spark up the conversation around Max’s mental health. You two would never truly be able to understand what she was going through, but there seemed to be a silent agreement that the both of you were going to be there for Max every step of the way.

It wasn’t the fact that Steve didn’t like working at Family Video—He got to work with one of his best friends, Robin. He got first dibs on new tapes for date night. He didn’t have to do much beside stock shelves, count inventory, and work the register.

But the pay wasn’t much, and the days were slow…sometimes too slow, like today.

Barely any new customers came in to rent some tapes and the old ones had yet to return their way over due tapes, something Robin would take care of with a phone call. He just needed to stick around for a few more weeks until he’d hopefully get promoted now that Keith was leaving his position as manager and he would get a little more money.

The money, of course, was going to a good cause: getting to move in with you and helping you with rent.

Though you never asked Steve or made him promise to help you with rent once you got your own apartment after graduation, but he just wanted to be considerate. He knew it wasn’t easy being a college student and adding on working a part-time job, so he wanted to do all he could to help you out if he was going to move in with you.

“Harrington!” Steve exhaled thickly, the chime of the front doors ringing followed by the voices of the teenage boys who loved badgering him on the job.

He turned around, being greeted by Dustin, Will, Lucas, and Mike, “Hey shitheads.” He joked, followed by a snort that came from Robin in the aisle over.

Mike and Will ignored the repartee, heading off into the horror section to see what new tapes were available, while the other two boys followed Steve as he headed towards the front desk to check off some of the inventory lists.

“You took Max and El to the arcade yesterday?” Dustin queried, watching Steve nod as he worked the pen.

He glanced up at the boy and shrugged, “They wanted to spend some girl time together…are you jealous you weren’t invited?”

Dustin rolled his eyes, shaking his head, “Never, it’s just that Eddie said he saw you and your girlfriend pick up Max early in the morning.”

Eddie Munson lived right across from Max’s trailer with his uncle Wayne. The two were never particularly close, but after Dustin started hanging around the dude and joined his DnD club, it was kinda inevitable that they’d become somewhat friends through the kid.

“Yeah,” Steve bowed his head, placing down the clipboard and resting his elbow on the desk, “We had to take Max to take care of a few things…have you spoken to her recently?”

He looked towards Lucas, her boyfriend, hoping to hear that Max was doing better, but instead, the young boy seemed to tense up at the question, shuffling from foot to foot.

“W-we actually broke up a few weeks ago and I haven’t heard from or seen her since. I think she’s avoiding me.” Lucas confessed quietly as Steve’s eyes widened at the announcement.

Dustin elbowed Lucas pointedly. “Dude, you didn’t tell him!?”

For a while, everyone knew about Max and Lucas’ split. Everyone except for you and Steve who were too busy to be probing into the lives of the kids they occasionally babysat. But in hindsight, it seemed to all make sense. Steve hadn’t seen the whole group of kids together at once for a while—Max was always missing. And Max seemed to only hang out with two other people El and sometimes Will.

Lucas sighed, shaking his head, “No! It’s embarrassing alright…I don’t even know what I did wrong. She just kinda dropped the bomb on me out of nowhere. I-I tried calling, but she never picks up.”

Steve’s heart sank, the words coming from Lucas reminding him of how El had phoned him the other day to tell him how concerned she was that Max wasn’t returning any of her calls for a while.

He knew that it might have something to do with what was going on with her emotional and mental wellbeing, but the breakup wasn’t the main thing. Max was strong and independent even before she and Lucas began dating. Steve knew that Max didn’t need a boyfriend to survive, but he had a feeling that maybe just maybe her emotions had pushed her to break it off with Lucas so suddenly and that was concerning enough for him to excuse himself into the break room to use the phone in there for more privacy.

The phone rung a few times before you finally picked up, “Hey, baby,” Steve said breathlessly when you answered.

“Stevie! How’s work?” You requested, closing the textbook you were studying and giving your boyfriend your undivided attention for a few minutes.

“Slow as per usual. The boys actually dropped in.” He told you, and you hummed, guessing they were probably causing some trouble that Steve needed to get away from.

“Yeah? Have they been poking fun at your vest?”

He chuckled, looking down at the pin you got made that said, “Best Salesmen” followed by his name, “No, no, actually it’s about Max.”

You furrowed your brows, sitting up in your desk chair as you listened more for the information that Steve was hurling at you.

“I asked Lucas how Max was doing, but he said that she broke it off with him a few weeks ago and he hasn’t been returning any of her calls. Completely out of nowhere.”

“Shit,” you moaned, rubbing your temples as he let out an agreement on the other side of the line.

“Right. And…I don’t know. I know she doesn’t need Lucas, per se. I mean she’s smart, and witty, and cool, but—but, maybe, do you think it has anything to do with what the doctor said?” He proposed, thinking back to the conversation in the doctor’s office.

You thought to yourself, nodding your head and responding, “Possibly, I mean, the doctor did say that isolation is a big thing that she could be doing to avoid talking about her feelings. M-maybe she broke up with Lucas because she felt bad about her feelings and didn’t want him to worry?”

“Yeah, yeah, that could be it,” He rubbed his chin, checking the time on his watch hoping that his lunch break was soon so he could stop by Max’s trailer to see if she was ok and was coping with the breakup alright.

But still, his break wasn’t until another hour, and the worry was eating him up alive, “Do—”

“I can go and pick up some of her favorite things and go check up on her?” You offered before he could ask, and a sigh of comfort left his mouth.

“Please…and let me know how she’s doing?” He asked almost desperately, as he heard you putting your highlighters and pens away.

“Of course, baby, I’ll call you when I get back.” You told him, gathering your keys that were a short distance from the phone before getting ready to hang up.

“Sounds good…OH! And maybe you could get her the Hershey’s bars with the almonds inside? I know she likes those.”

He remembered the movie night a few months ago, the same one where they all drew on his face. Max had gone straight for the candy bar, monopolizing it to herself and only giving pieces of it to El and a few to Steve, since he was the one who bought it.

You laughed, making a mental note and adding it to the list of things you were already planning to get Max in order to cheer her up, “Got it, babe! I’ll head out now. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He replied, hearing you smack your lips giving him a telephone kiss as he chuckled and did the same before hanging up first and getting back to work. He had hope that the more he worked the more time would pass and he would hear back from you with good news.

The grocery store had all you needed for the pick-me-ups that Max would surely like. The chocolate almond bar that Steve told you to get, a few more bags of candy, some tissues, and a small bouquet of flowers for the extra touch.

You stood there in front of the trailer, tapping gingerly and calling out her name a few times before you could hear the footsteps from inside coming closer until the doorknob twisted and there was Max dressed in an oversized t-shirt with her hair in a messy bun. Your smile faltered slightly when you remembered why you were here in the first place.

“Hey,” she greeted, opening the door wider when she saw it was you. Furrowing her brows with the items in your hand, you smiled apologetically, handing her the flowers first.

“Hey Max. I brought some stuff to cheer you up,” you said watching her take the florals and look at you confused, “I’m so sorry if this is awkward, but Lucas told Steve about the breakup and he told me, and we just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

Max’s expression softened, stepping aside to let you in, “It’s okay, you don’t have to apologize…this is actually really sweet.”

You smiled weakly, walking into her trailer and feeling relieved that she wasn’t upset. “No, yeah, we just wanted to make sure you’re doing alright since we had no idea about it.”

The two of you sat down on the couch, and you watched as she grinned when you gave her the rest of the treats. The chocolate bar being immediately ripped open as she broke off a piece and offered it to you first, which you accepted before she began indulging in it.

You chewed on the sweet treat, swallowed before you spoke, “So, uh, Steve and I were just wonder…did Lucas do something to hurt you? Or is it just that you’re not interested anymore?”

Max felt the knot in her stomach, sighing as this would be the first time she was explaining it to anyone. Even when Lucas asked why and even El, she simply brushed them off and told them it was normal or nothing.

“It’s not that. I still love and care about Lucas, but I just…just don’t think that a relationship is good for me right now. I’m not in the right mindset, y’know?”

You nodded, understanding where she was coming from and it all washed over you, “Yeah, I totally get it. And I’m sorry again if we were prying or anything. Just want you to know me and Steve are here for you, through anything and everything.”

The young girl smiled, feeling grateful for the kindness and time you took out of your day to come in and check on her when you could’ve simply picked up the phone and called. The effort mattered, and she was appreciative of that.

“Hey…and if Lucas loves you, he’ll understand and be patient,” you added, smiling softly and resting a hand on her knee, “take all the time you need, and when you’re ready, you two can work things out.”

She didn’t bother speaking a word to you. Her smile and arms that she wrapped around you were enough for her to express that she was thankful for everything you and Steve had done in the past three days.

“Do you think I could spend the night at yours? Girls’ night with me and El, if you’re not busy or working tomorrow?” She sought, pulling away from you as you smiled and nodded.

It was a Friday and thankfully you didn’t have much work to get done for school and you didn’t pick up a shift at the general store until next week so you were practically free, “Sure, but just in case can you call your mom and make sure it’s alright with her?”

She nodded, getting up for the phone before she turned to you, “There’s some lemonade in the fridge that I made this morning. Eddie’s uncle gave us a whole bag last night…apparently some guy at his plant has a huge lemon tree.”

You snorted, nodding your head as you got up, heading for the kitchen and pouring yourself a refreshingly sour glass of lemonade while Max called her mom’s working place to get through and ask if it was alright to spend the night at yours.

Once she got the green light from her mom and calling El to invite her, she headed for her room, packing some of her things that she would need while she was at yours, along with some cassettes that she wanted to show to you and El. You washed up your glass, tidying up a bit before you used the phone to call Steve and let him know that everything was ok and that Max and El would be staying with you for the night.

She shut her bedroom door, walking out with her duffle bag slung over her shoulder, “I’m ready,” she announced to you as you smiled, still holding the phone to your ear.

Steve was concerned about Max and asked if he could speak to her over the phone to check up on her, “It’s Steve. He wants to talk to you if that’s ok?” You asked her, and she agreed, dropping her bag down on the sofa and accepting the phone you held out for her.

You could hear Steve talking her ear off the moment he knew that she was now on the phone with him. Max kept humming out “mhm’s” and “yes’s” nodding her head along with whatever Steve was telling her.

“You made a really brave and good decision, Max.” Steve spoke, his voice soothing, “Putting yourself isn’t a bad thing and if anything I’m so proud of you for doing it. If Lucas can’t see what an amazing girl you are it’s his loss at the end of the day. Take some time for yourself and when you’re ready, maybe you both will find your way back together.”

God, he felt like such a dad right now, but he said all the right words, the ones that Max needed to hear.

Her cheeks rose with a smile on her face as she thanked him, grateful for his support.

“Thanks, Steve. It’s just hard, you know? I still care about Lucas so much, but I just don’t feel like I can be in a relationship right now.”

“I get it,” Steve responded. “But I want you to know that you’re smart and don’t need a boyfriend behind you. You’re good enough on your own right now, and when you’re ready, you’ll find someone who deserves you.”

Max felt a sense of comfort wash over her. Sure maybe all the teens, including herself would make fun of Steve of being such a dad with all his lecture and advice, but he had this special knack for knowing how making people feel better, even in the toughest times and today it was no different with her situation.

“T-thanks, Steve. That means a lot,” Max’s voice cracked, feeling her eyes start to well up with tears out of nowhere.

You moved beside her, hoisting an arm around her shoulder, and you pulled her into a side hug, and brushed the tears off her cheeks with your thumbs. You knew she was massively touched by everything you and Steve were doing for her, and it was heartwarming to see her so vulnerable when it came to you two.

“Hey, don’t cry,” you could hear Steve say through the speaker, his voice gentle. “I know this is tough, but we’re here for you. Whatever you need, we’ll be here to support you.”

“Thanks, Steve,” Max spoke, smiling up at you as you continued to brush away her tears. “I really appreciate it. I just hope that one day, Lucas and I can patch things up.”

“I’m sure you will, Max,” Steve said, his voice reassuring. “But for now, just focus on taking care of yourself. That’s the most important thing, alright?”

She assured Steve and thanked him once more before he let her go. Yelling out an “I love you” for you before Max placed the phone back down on the receiver. She locked up the place, petting the stray cats outside the porch before she got into your car and you two drove off to pick up El.

Once the three of you were in the car, the party was already started. Madonna blasting through your radio with the windows down as you all shouted out the lyrics and danced in your seats. You decided to stop at the store to pick up a few more things to make it a bit more special. Wandering the aisles, you picked out face masks, microwavable popcorn, and all the other things that would make a sleepover fun.

When you finally arrived at your apartment, the girls couldn’t wait to make themselves at home, springing up the steps until they got to your floor, already hearing you doggie, Ollie, barking from inside.

You smiled, unlocking the door and letting them in first, watching as they dropped their bags and went straight for your pup. Cuddling him in their arms and giggling at his playful antics while you began unloading the bags from the store on the coffee table in the living room.

“Okay, tonight we’re going to have fun, but there’s just one rule!” You announced, dusting your hands off as you plopped onto the couch, watching the girls tilt their head up towards you and nod.

“No boy talk! None at all! Nothing about current boyfriends, ex-boyfriends…I don’t want to hear about your romantic lives and I’m sure you don’t want to hear about mine—no boy talk! Capiche?”

The girls snickered, nodding their heads, as they got up from the floor and decided to join you on the couch, reaching for a bag of chips and opening it to share with each other.

“So, how is college? Is it harder than high school?” Max sought before stuffing her mouth full of the crunch chips.

You breathed, nodding your head wistfully as their faces dropped.

“It’s definitely more rigorous, but it helps to have a routine. I’m getting used to it.”

El sat up, nodding her head in agreement, “Jonathan says that college is tough…he gets sad when Nancy is busy and doesn’t call because of study or exams.”

Jonathan, her half-brother through Joyce, had decided to stay in Hawkins, pursing his career of photography in town by booking some weddings and birthday parties. Nancy headed off for college the same year you did, but she went out of state at a university while you stayed back and decided to attend a community college to save some money first.

“Yeah, but it’s all worth it in the end,” you assured her, patting her shoulder as she went on, with wide eyes.

“I’m so nervous about college,” she pressed her hands on her cheeks as you and Max giggled, “what if I don’t get in?!”

You knew how she felt and it wasn’t too long ago when you were a senior feeling totally lost in the mix of applying for colleges and hoping for an acceptance letter.

“Don’t worry, you have plenty of time to figure it out,” You criss-crossed your legs together and looked between the two girls, “You two are gonna be sophomores in a few weeks and maybe then you’ll figure out what you wanna pursue and that will be something to check off your list.”

They looked a bit more relived yet nervous, realizing that they were in fact entering sophomore in a matter of days. The summer had flown by quickly and a new school year was about to be in session. Freshman year wasn’t too bad considering the fact that the group stayed together, but as time goes on, they knew that new friends would sprout and growing apart was normal.

“Hey…and when your senior year comes, I’ll be there to help you both with college applications and I’ll even read over your essays and make sure they’re ready to go.” You assured them, making them smile broader, no longer fearful about the future, but more so glad that they’d have you to go to for any college advice.

“We’ve got this,” Max smirked, high-fiving her best friend before Ollie had joined in on the excitement, barking cheerfully and running around in circles, making all three of you giggle at his cuteness.

As the day slowly dwindled into night, the three of you had changed into more comfortable clothing: big t-shirts and sweatpants. The couch was now situated with fluffed up pillows and even softer blankets. Your faces now glazed in the clay face masks with a movie playing on the TV and a big bowl of the popcorn being passed around the three of you.

Only the knock on the door made you three tear your eyes away from the TV. Ollie immediately running towards the front door, sniffing then barking. You got up, and Max paused the movie, as the two sat up, watching you open the wooden door first, revealing Steve on the other side of the outer screen door.

“Did someone order half pepperoni and cheese and half pineapple for a girls’ night?” Steve tries his best to deepen his voice as if his own girlfriend and the girls wouldn’t recognize him.

You rolled your eyes, stifling a laugh as you opened the door, to greet him, “You’re such a dork!” you say, giving him a kiss as he chuckles against you making sure his lips don’t touch the mask on your face.

He enters the apartment with the pizza box balanced on his palm, shooting a smile to the girls and Ollie who races in circles around Steve’s feet—the usual Ollie greeting.

The girls get up. El taking the pizza box from him and setting it down on the coffee table while Max picks up the small container of the clay face mask. He looks at them, puzzled, as El begins to speak, “You can stay, but you have to follow the rules!”

You’re highly entertained, listening to their conversation as you locked up the door and headed for the kitchen to grab some plate and napkins.

He huffs, crossing his arms over his chest, “Lay it on me.”

“No boy talk!” El declares firmly with a pointed finger, and he nods. Steve can totally do that.

Max steps closer. “Annnnd you have to put on the face mask,” she says with a mischievous grin.

Despite his protests and even begging for you to back him up, he eventually agrees, letting Max dip her fingers into the goopy product and smear it across his face. El grabbed the extra scrunchie on her wrist, tying back Steve’s hair into a wonky ponytail when he complained about it getting in his hair.

You couldn’t help yourself, jogging into your bedroom to snatch your polaroid off your desk in order to snap a picture of the scene in the living room. Steve sat on the couch with his face scrunched up, while Max laughed and swatted his hands away when he tried to stop her from putting more on. And El in the background giving a thumbs up with a massive smile on her face. The photo was definitely going to be one of your most prized possessions now.

Soon enough, Max’s hands were now free of the clay and all four of you had some pizza while you continued on with the movie before talking to each other about life. Steve was about to say something about Eddie entering the dating scene, but before he could finish, the three of you were shouting and groaning, “No talking about boys!”

Steve laughed, shutting his mouth as he apologized and you all laughed, “Sorry! Sorry. I forgot the rule!”

You smiled, shaking your head as you cuddled into his side, rubbing his arm up and down comfortingly, “We just want a night without talking about guys…I mean it’s pretty stereotypical, but sometimes it’s exhausting talking about boy…no offence, baby.”

Steve chuckled, nodding his head in agreement with your statement, “None taken, doll. And you’re right, boys aren’t the end-all, be-all, of life. All three of you can make it on your own without any man,” he looked down at pouting, “but like, totally, don’t break up with me because I just said that.”

Max groaned, garnering the attention of you both as you looked at her, “This is the only time, I’m breaking the rule,” she pointed at you two as you both nodded, “You and Steve do make a pretty good couple—caring, funny, and surprisingly reliable.”

El piped in, “Don’t forget cute!”

“Oh, and cute!” Max added, as she and El high-fived each other and you and Steve snorted at their amusement.

Steve wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, “Thanks, and now I can say that me and my girl are the cutest couple in Hawkins! You heard it here first!” He announced, making you laugh while the other girls sighed, shaking their heads.

“Oh god, we shouldn’t have said that!”

Soon all your faces are now cleansed and refreshed and the night is slowly simmering down with yawns and sleepy eyes filling the living room. You tidy up the kitchen, washing the dirty plates and cups, as Steve helps you out while the girls get homey in the living room, getting ready for bed.

“Thanks for letting them spend the night here.” Steve murmured from behind you, kissing your neck as you hum and close your eyes, letting him stay them for a moment before you turn your head and kiss his lips.

When you pull away, the two of you are still smiling, before you pat his chest, “C’mon lover boy, you need your sleep remember?”

He nods with a grin, taking your hand and kissing it before the two of you are walking back into the living room, standing in front of the couch where the girls are fluffing up their pillows.

“I’m heading out now, I’ve got a shift in the morning,” He told them as they nodded, getting up and each going in for a hug.

You smiled at the scene, heart-warming up as he wrapped his arms around them and pulled them a little closer, savoring this moment that was so simple yet meaningful to him. And especially for Max who held on a little longer, quietly whispering a “thank you,” before she pulled away and got comfy on the couch.

“Goodnight, Steve.” The girls yawned out tiredly, as they pulled their blankets up over their bodies.

Steve grinned, looking at how comfortable they were already, “Night bugs.”

He opened the front door, bending down to pet Ollie goodnight, before he was off running towards the couch and settling between the two girls comfortably. You wrapped your arms around him, inhaling his scent before you rested your chin on his chest, looking up at him as he looked down on you, pressing your lips together again.

“I love you, drive safe ok?” You told him and he nodded, kissing your forehead, then one more time on your lips before you had to unwrap your arms.

“I will, and I love you too…I’ll call in the morning before my shift.”

You nodded, smiling as he parted ways with you, walking down the steps of your apartment building and into the parking lot below where he waved at you before he drove off into the night.

Closing the door and triple checking that you had locked it, you made your way over to the girls, already beginning to doze off slightly as they forced themselves to stay awake to say goodnight to you.

“I’m gonna let you two have the couch with Ollie tonight, but I’ll just be in my bedroom and I’ll keep my door open if anything, alright?” You told them softly, and they nodded their heads, with dopey smiles on their faces.

“Kay, goodnight,” they singsonged as their eyes fell and you quietly giggled, bending down to press a warm kiss to the tops of their heads.

“Goodnight, sweethearts…night Ollie.”

As Max laid there listening to the slight snores already coming from El, she couldn’t help but think about how uncomfortable she felt a few days ago in the doctor’s office. The bright fluorescent lighting and the cold, sterile environment made her feel uneasy and anxious. She was on edge about everything the doctor was saying and how it all erupted before her eyes.

But now, as she lay on the couch in your living room, with the soft glow of the moon seeping through the curtains and her eyelids, she felt safe and at peace. The warmth of the blankets and the gentle hum of the air conditioning made her feel calm and relaxed. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, letting the tension in her body melt away.

As she drifted off to sleep, she couldn’t help but feel hopeful about the future. She knew that there would be challenges and obstacles to overcome, but she also knew that she had the support of her friends and especially you and Steve. With a smile on her face, she whispered a quiet “thank you,” grateful for this moment of peace and comfort.

a/n: i hope you guys liked chapter one of this series!!! i know it is angsty and there is a lot of talk about mental and emotional health, but i really feel like it's something worth talking about. opening up is never easy and i hope this story depicts the high and lows of what that's like from max's eyes, but also the blossoming relationship that max and steve (and reader) will start to form as time goes on. a big big thank you to @translatemunson for always listening to my ideas and giving me some to incorporate as well!! i love you, effie <3 going to start working on chapter two soon!!! in the meantime, let me know what you think: reblogs, tags, comments, and likes are greatly appreciated!!!

taglist (if you would like to be added just leave a comment!): @translatemunson @kennedy-brooke @manda-panda-monium @tvserie-s-world @wanderlustaflame @fruitbutt @thegaysaretired

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wooahaeruby · 3 months

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Chapter 21: One Step At A Time

Chapter Word Count: 4,316

Anything in Bold Italics are Korean/Another language.

Master List | Prev | Next

After months, the tour was finally over. New Years passed just over a week ago, getting you past the Golden Disc Awards.

The Be The Sun era had come to an end and most award shows were done, each member now had the chance to go home, take a vacation, or just rest at their dorm. Within the next couple of weeks, all of the members would be moving to their own accommodations with the dorm contract ending and Jihoon would be moving into your apartment sooner rather than later. Throughout the last few weeks between tour stops and award shows, Jihoon and you had sat down multiple times and came up with a plan of how things would go.

First step would be going through all your items that were shipped from America with him and figuring out which items you wanted to keep, what needed to be tossed, and make a list of what would need to be bought. Second step was setting up the apartment to fully accommodate two people rather than one, which overall wouldn’t be too difficult. One thing already decided on was the sleeping situation, or well, it wasn’t a question of needing a proper bed rather than a mattress pad. Another thing was Jihoon learning how to cook more recipes so all the cooking wasn’t falling on you, however you would gladly be by his side to help if he needed.

Sitting on the couch, both you and Jihoon were reviewing the inventory list that was sent over from the moving company. Jihoon had taken it upon himself to grab your very large, king sized fluffy blanket you fell in love with and bundled the two of you up in it.

“ We can put my old bed in the second room as a guest bed after getting a new mattress?”

Jihoon snickered. “ Why are you making it sound like a question? And we also have the option of my old bed frame.”

“Will it be big enough if two people visit? Jamie and Kazu? Or my grandparents in the future? I know they are staying in a hotel this time but a guest room would be nice.”

“You said you wanted the second room as an office.”

“Well, it can be both. Office-guest room.” You huffed, leaning away from him, only for him to continue to lean into your side. “ Stop stealing my body heat.”

He only shook his head, eyes never leaving the screen. He pulled his arm from the blanket and motioned around in the air. “ Why not say fuck it and get a new bed and dresser and be done with it?”

“Well- I don’t want the stuff going to waste. I’m already bringing in my two bookshelves and my big desk so I’m thinking of spending as little money as possible if we have so much. Plus, we are already bringing your wardrobe from the dorm into the bedroom since it’s more spacious than mine.”

Jihoon dug around between the two of you to find his phone but came up with yours, holding it to your face to unlock it. You snickered at that and watched him pull up the note you’ve been compiling of what you’d be bringing each and what you were still debating on. “ So your bed frame is an American queen size, it would fit in the bedroom and the wardrobe would be against the wall so that isn’t an issue. Your desk is pretty big so we can slide it in a corner of the second room by the window and my double bed can fit in there without a problem on the other wall. Since there is no dresser in there, we can get a smaller wardrobe and that room would be complete.”

“What about your desk?”

He blinked, pursing his lips in thought. “ The second bedroom here is big enough to fit everything, it’s way bigger than my room in general. I can place my desk beside yours. Two desks, a wardrobe and the double bed will work. I don’t have a lot outside of my room since I shared the dorm with Jeonghanie-hyung, Seungkwanie, and Soonyoungie.”

“Then we can use my TV stand and purchase a new TV, something decent sized maybe?” He nodded, typing it down under the things to buy category. “ I have a small table for the kitchen, four chairs with it. We need a coffee table since I gave mine to Jamie.” Another item added to the list. “ Then we can figure out what else we need as time goes on?”

“ Yeah, I think we will be okay. Tomorrow we can both call the movers and hopefully have things set for the end of the week.”

Shutting your laptop, you shimmied down further into the blanket and sighed. “Then next week my grandparents come into town.”

“Nothing to worry about, nothing will ever be as bad as my mom.”

“ God- Don’t remind me.” You tossed your head back against the couch cushion. “ Has she ever reached out?”

“Once, right before New years. Wasn’t an apology though. My dad has been wanting to come into town but he would only be able to stay the day because of the bond withdrawal.”

Your face contorted into a cringe. “ That’s dumb. Why can’t she just suck up her BS and apologies?”

“I’ve asked myself that a few times since you met her.”

Organized chaos was a good word for what was happening. Much like you hoped, both moving companies for your things from storage and Jihoon’s stuff from the dorm were free on the same day (and you didn’t know why one company could just do both, it was stupid). And much to your delight, you’d get movers for your items in the morning and the other company would show up later in the day. However, what you didn’t expect was half of Seventeen showing up, saying they could help when in reality they were just getting in the way.

“ Can you guys go sit in the kitchen or something, move!” You complained, pushing Seungcheol into the kitchen, followed by Vernon, Seungkwan, Mingyu, and Seokmin. “ Let them do their jobs and you can help later!”

“ So rude, Ruby-ah~” Seungcheol hummed, hopping on the counter near your sink which had you rolling your eyes.

“ You all show up after we said not to and are getting in the way.” Sticking your tongue out at him, you turned quickly and profusely apologized to the first set of movers, watching the team bring pieces of your bed frame in.

The mattress pad was currently rolled up on the couch for the time being, something you’d be using until the new mattress came in within the next few days, then stored in the closet just in case. Jihoon was down the hall packing some of his personal things with the (un)helpful help of Soonyoung from what his last text message said, leaving you to deal with the movers and those idiots currently in your kitchen.

Everything was running smoothly, the movers were absolutely fantastic at placing each furniture piece exactly where you wanted them, even giving suggestions on how everything would fit with the other items you’d be bringing it. From what your landlord said when you asked about good moving etiquette, he said that on top of paying for their services, you could ‘tip’ them with money for food after completing their service. You took cash out from your account – enough for each worker to get a nice meal – and gave them a deep bow, thanking them for their service once they were on the way out.

“ So what are we having for lunch?” Mingyu asked once the door to your apartment was closed, already rummaging through your refrigerator for something to eat or cook.

“Oh nah, get your grubby little hands out of my fridge.” You hurried into the kitchen, nearly running smack into the kitchen table that was brought in. “ Order yourself food, heathens.”

“ But we came to help!”

“And you haven’t done shit! I should have kicked you all out!” You stomped, crossing your arms over your chest.

“ I invited everyone over for dinner later.” Seungcheol just had to speak up, smirking wide.

“I’m gonna commit.” You grabbed a dish rag and threw it at him. “ Starve for all I care.”

Electricity buzzed down your spine and you spun on your toes, hustling to the door, opening it before Jihoon could punch your code in. “ Kick them out.”

“Kick- I told them not to show up.”

Giving him a pout, you moved aside to let him and Soonyoung through the door, both carrying a few bags and dragging suitcases behind them. “ Guys- Can’t you leave Ruby-ah and I alone for a day?”

“No,” Mingyu huffed, closing the fridge. “ You both are my friends.”

“Seungcheol-ah invited everyone over for take out.”

“Huh?!” Jihoon dropped all the items he carried into the living room around your boxes the movers brought, grumbling in disbelief. “ We aren't paying for food.”

“Never said you were!” Seungcheol defended and you facepalmed.

“I’m dealing with children. I will never know any peace. I’m going to commit.” You muttered to yourself but Vernon and Mingyu laughed to themselves.

“ Rock, paper, scissors for who pays!” Seungkwan called out and gathered around Seungcheol. Soonyoung, Seokmin, and Mingyu followed in with Vernon being pulled alongside the five of them.

Two rounds later, Seokmin was crumbling to the floor, whining out loudly that he lost. Jihoon and you had started to separate out his things for which bags would go into which room while they messed around, knowing not to involve yourselves in their antics. Majority of the bags were stuffed with clothes since the wardrobe would be taken apart to fit through the doorway. Anything else he was bringing could be brought before Seungkwan, Jeonghan, and Soonyoung moved out since they were only down the hall.

It wasn’t long before the second movers arrived and Seungkwan and Soonyoung hurried down the hall with Jihoon to make sure everything was out of the living room so as to not interfere with the movers’ job. Jeonghan and Joshua had strolled in just as they were leaving, the former over exaggerating a compliment of the newly added kitchen table as he took a seat.

“Stay in the kitchen!” You called out, pushing some boxes towards the shelves on either side of the TV stand, knowing you’d have to sort through each box and place things up while leaving room for anything Jihoon wished to add.

Thankfully, the guys did stay in the kitchen, however Vernon and Seokmin did raid your snack cabinet, passing different chips and treats around to each. You greeted the movers when Jihoon returned with the first item, his desk and chair, with him holding the blankets and pillows to his bed in both arms. With the destination only being down the hall, it didn’t take long for the apartment to be bustling with workers rebuilding the wardrobe and bed frame in each room. Jihoon had left for the dorm to collect anymore of his personal belongings, leaving you to supervise and organize.

Everything around you was falling into the proper place. There was a hint of excitement bubbling within for the newest chapter of your life you were entering. Typical things wouldn’t change much, however you’d be back to living with someone after living alone since leaving college, but this person, Jihoon , was your soulmate, your partner. While there was only months between bumping into one another and settling the bond, it already felt like a lifetime.

“ Ruby-ah~” Mingyu motioned you over from where you sat on the living room floor, peeking inside boxes to see what was where.

Reluctantly you stood and shuffled over, frowning at your snacks being downed by the members. “ Hm?”

Mingyu tugged you close to his side, rubbing your upper arm. “Seokminie is going to get fried chicken for dinner.”

With a tiny gasp, you pushed Mingyu away and shuffled towards Seokmin who sat on the counter on the other side of the sink from Seungcheol. He was popping some of the chocolate pieces into his mouth that you had in the front of your cabinet to get as a treat once in a while. You hugged him tightly, catching him by surprise, but he was happily able to hug you back, swaying you to and fro.

“ You’re the best!”

A laugh bubbled out of his chest and he continued to sway. “ We’ll get beer too! Make it a housewarming party!”

“Most of us will have to eat on the floor.” Jeonghan snickered and you shot a glare over your shoulder at him.

“ Shut up!”

Both you and him stuck your tongue out at each other before Seokmin released you from his hold and you went back to your place in the living room. Joshua came to sit beside you, helping you go through the boxes one by one. You pulled out a medium sized picture frame wrapped up in bubble wrap, unpacking it to find it as one of your favorites. It was you as a child sitting in your mother’s lap with Mimi and Papa on either side, all dressed in silly little matching sweaters. You were only two years old in the picture but it was the only picture you had with the four of you before your parents passed. Staring at it for a moment, you let your fingers trace over your mothers features and the smiles that were spread on each of your faces.

Joshua craned his neck to peek at the picture and smiled softly. “You were so little.”

“Uh- Yeah. I was about two. It was a Christmas picture. It’s the last picture I have of my mom.” You stood and placed the picture on a middle shelf on the bookshelf to the left TV stand. “There should be two more frames in there, one from my highschool graduation and one from my master’s graduation.”

Both you and Joshua easily found the other two pictures. You unwrapped and held them close to your chest as you looked over them, reminiscing on the days from each picture.

At your highschool graduation, Papa had bought two big bouquets of flowers, one of pink tulips (conveying congratulations) and the other white roses (conveying new beginnings). He was so proud of you and it was the first time you had seen him cry of joy. He asked one of your classmate’s parents to take a picture of the three of you. Mimi was smiling so wide and Papa was holding you close to his side, while you stood in the middle, tears going down your cheeks but a smile spread on your face with both bouquets in hand.

For your graduation from the Masters program, you didn’t get the chance to walk the stage due to the pandemic, however your grandmother insisted you at least get pictures done as a commemoration. You got dressed up in a cap and gown and took pictures in a sunflower field upstate when you went to visit them. Papa had done research once more and got a mixed bouquet of Baby’s Breath, another flower that could mean new beginnings, and pink Hydrangeas, that mean heartfelt emotions (because he loved you greatly). It was the last picture of the day and you held the bouquet before you with your degree frame in hand, again standing between them with wide smiles.

You placed both pictures on either side of your family portrait, even getting your degree out and placing it on the very top shelf (with the help of Joshua). It was a start, but you’d make this apartment a proper home like your old studio back in the states. A home to grow in and a home to cherish every loving moment that came.

With Joshua’s help, you were able to organize and sort the items in the box. It was an amalgamation of books, knick knacks, and trinkets you’ve collected over the years. You were quick to get them on the shelf, happy that there would be one less box littering the living room.

He laughed when he opened the second box mysteriously labeled Prized Possessions with a heart at the end. Leaning over to see the inside, you laughed as well, reaching in and pulling out the box for your Seventeen Lightstick and one of the bubble wrapped albums.

“I’m going to kill Jamie and Kazu.”

“Nah, this is great.” Joshua waved you off, only to laugh more as he started to take the albums out of the box. “You have so many!”

“Listen! I started collecting during Covid, I didn’t have a lot to do!”

“You have almost two versions of each of the newest albums!”

“This was before I knew Jihoon was my soulmate, stop bullying me!”

“Guys-” Joshua was standing, grabbing a handful of the albums and scurrying away from your reach before you could stop him. “ Look look! Ruby-ah has so many albums!”

“Hong Jisoo! Stop!” You grabbed onto the back of his shirt but the albums were already in Jeonghan’s hands.

“ Wahh~!” Jeonghan grinned wide. “ Where are your photo cards, who did you pull??”

“I’m not telling you-”

“I’ll check the box for an organizer-” Joshua cut you off, hurrying back.

“Stop exposing me!”

The front door clicked open and Jihoon returned back with Seungkwan and Soonyoung, carrying miscellaneous belongings that were dropped in the living room.

“ Are those our albums?” Seungkwan asked and you leaned over one of the kitchen chairs and whined out.

“ I found it!” Joshua called out which made you sink to the floor and lay there in a pile of your own embarrassment.

“ It can’t be that bad.” Jeonghan started, looking down at you in pity. “ Unless you have a secret…”

“I’m already being exposed. I will not win this battle. I will only be shamed.”

Joshua opened it as he walked over but stopped, flipping through page after page of the photocards and stared down at you with a smirk. “He isn’t going to like this~” He said in a sing-song tune.

“ Why? Why??” Mingyu ran over to Joshua and you swore there was an invisible tail wagging behind him. “ Oh noooo!”

“Jihoonie, I’d like to formally apologize for the person I once was.” You didn’t even bother to look away from the ceiling, wishing to become one with the floor.

“ What’s the big deal-” Seungcheol moved to peer over Joshua’s shoulder and the most shit eating grin spread on his features. “ Wow, Ruby-ah, that’s a lot of photocards of me.”

“ I’m sorry Jihoonie, but I’d like to respectfully pass away.”

“ At this point I’m not even surprised.” Jihoon said, curious enough to join the huddle and see for himself the extent of your collection.

Page after page, they flipped through the organizer before Mingyu let out a squeak in excitement and grabbed Jihoon. “ Hyung! There are a lot of you!”

“Wah.” Jihoon let out the small sound of surprise, watching the pages flip.

“ I am no longer a being of this planet, I am just one with the floor.”

“Well, now we know who Ruby-ah’s wrecker is.” Joshua snickers before handing the binder to Jeonghan who was giving grabby hands.

Jihoon crouched down to your pity party on the floor. “ Get off the floor, Ruby-ah.”

“ I don’t know who Ruby-ah is, I am the floor.”

Jihoon reached out and grabbed both of your wrists, standing up, planting his feet on either side of your legs, and pulling you until you were sitting up. With a pout, you stared at him with the saddest eyes you could muster, letting your hands lay limp in his hold. He brushed some hair back from your face then pulled you up to stand relatively easy.

“ I’m going to order the food.” Seokmin called out, pulling his phone from his pocket.

You stumbled back to the living room after taking your photocard binder and albums from Jeonghan and Seungkwan (both whining as if you took a toy away from them), muttering about how they were mean to you. The movers finished up the installation of the furniture and Jihoon sent them off, but you didn’t really pay attention as you organized your albums in release order and placed them on the lower shelf of the left bookcase.

“ Yah, stop sulking on the floor.” Mingyu stood behind you and leaned over into your space, looking over your face. “ A few of the guys are going to their dorms to get beer from their fridge and Shua-hyung is going to the store to get more.”

With a pout, you spun around and took the hand he offered when he stood straight, standing up and stretching out your legs and arms. The members that were already in your home were helpful enough in getting dishware and cups, but Soonyoung jogged down the hall to get more cups, chopsticks, and two folding lap tables they had back in their dorm.

Not an hour later, your kitchen counters were packed, the table was toppling with containers, and many bodies were sitting on the living room floor, using some of the boxes, laptables, and a suitcase or two as makeshift tables. Beers were being downed, chicken was being eaten, and you were laughing at something Chan was saying about one of the members of Ateez, Wooyoung if you remembered, who he became fast friends with. Vernon and Joshua sat on either side of you on the floor, takeout containers on your hardshell suitcase, separating Chan, Minghao, and Mingyu from you.

Speaking of Mingyu, there has been a joke from a movie swimming through your head. It’s been on your mind for a while. Back during tour when Mingyu’s stage office consisted of the sheer, sparkly shirt, you thought of it and had a laughing fit that you couldn’t explain without dying . You had asked Joshua and Vernon if they had seen the movie and much to your delight they had and you promised to give them a reference and placed a bet that Mingyu would fall gloriously into your trap. Now seemed like the perfect time.

“ Mingyu-ah.” You downed the rest of your nearly empty can of beer, pointing to him. “ Why are your boobs so big?”

You heard Joshua choke on his piece of chicken beside you. Mingyu quickly covered his chest with his arms crossed over one another, curling in on himself. Vernon leaned his head back and to the side, curling his lips in to bite them so as to not burst out laughing. Chan was already toppled over on the floor which caught the attention of a few other guys. Minghao looked amused but only sipped his beer with a smile he was trying to hide.

“ They aren’t boobs! They are pecks!” Mingyu looked blown away, mouth open slightly in astonishment. “ I worked hard on them!”

“Do you have to wear a bra?”

“Bra- I don’t need a bra!”

“ Lotte World Mall has a Victoria Secret, maybe they have your size there, but you won’t get any cute colors since you are a bigger size.”

“Spare me-” Vernon had joined Chan on the floor, heaving in breaths that only came back out in boisterous laughter.

Minghao and Joshua were both trying to keep in their laughter but giggles from Minghao seeped out and Joshua was leaning on your side, painfully trying to hold everything in by the expression on his face. Mingyu’s expression shifted to something even more blown away. He was at a loss for words and his cheeks were bright red, more than from drinking at this point.

“I’m just saying,” Grabbing a piece of chicken, you giggled to yourself. “ We can get you fitted, look all cute.”

“He looks so-” Joshua started but his words trailed off in pained laughter and he too was on the floor. “I can’t breathe-”

“ I think Ruby-ah needs to stop drinking-” Chan pointed and laughed at Mingyu, his child-like laugh filling the entire apartment.

“Huh?! No! I barely had two cans!” You bit into the piece of chicken in your hand, snickering to yourself. “ I am hilarious!”

Jihoon had forced everyone to clean up and kicked them out for the night once midnight passed. Mingyu, despite the playful bullying you subjected him to, helped with dishes and resorted the living room to a less cluttered mess. With a tight squeeze of a hug, Mingyu was off, leaving the two of you to figure out the rest.

You and Jihoon decided you were both too lazy to put sheets on his bed in the spare room so you’d sleep on the mattress pad in the living room. Soon the floor was littered with blankets and pillows, a small little nest for you both to bed down in until the laziness wore off or the new mattress came in for the bedroom.

Curling up beside one another, Jihoon held your waist, letting his tired eyes flutter shut but open to meet yours. “ You look happy.”

The small, tired smile you had on your face spread and you nodded, pulling the blankets up to your chin. “ I feel happy. This is a new chapter for both of us. Who knows what the future will hold for us?”

He moved closer, resting his forehead against yours, fully closing his eyes. “ I don’t know, but I’m lucky to have you by my side on this journey.”

#seventeen #seventeen x reader #svt #seventeen jihoon #woozi x reader #svt woozi #soulmate au #seventeen soulmate au #seventeen fic #svt x reader

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bellatrixobsessed1 · 1 year

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Azul Week Day 6 - Four Seasons

Summary: Azula takes Sokka to see a firefly boom but the fireflies don't want to appear.

Sunrise is her favorite time. The quiet and lonely golden hour that people seem to miss because they can’t be bothered to rise early enough. Perhaps it makes her selfish, but she doesn’t like to share this hour with anyone. Not even with Sokka. She likes to take it with a cup of daisy-dandelion tea and a thin blanket draped around her shoulders for the sake of having a blanket around her shoulders.

Sunset, the second golden hour, is her second favorite time. It isn’t as quiet; in fact it is rather noisy. The crickets are beginning to awaken and the people are well awake and making their own racket.

The fireflies also begin to awaken, cluster by cluster until they are everywhere blinking in the tall grasses and upon the trees.

Usually by now, the world around smells like smoked meats and burning the burning leaves of campfires. This is the time that she wants to share with Sokka. He enjoys meat anyhow, most certainly more than he would enjoy her shaking him awake early in the morning. Sometimes she does that anyways when she feels sad for no reason. Sometimes she does it accidentally when she wants someone to hold or nuzzle her face against. He gets grumpy but he holds her anyhow.

“We’re almost there.” Azula remarks.

“Exactly where are we going?” Sokka pushes a fern leaf aside.

“There’s a big hill. We’re going on top of that.”

Sokka furrows his brows. “Why are we doing that again?”

“Because I want to show you something.”

“Will the cicadas stop by the time we get there? Those things are driving me crazy. We don’t have those back at home.”

“You complain about the cicadas every year.” Azula rolls her eyes.

“Is it just me or do they get louder every year?”

“I think that it’s just you.”

“I think that you Fire Nationals are just used to it.” He grumbles.

“We’re here.” Azula declares.

Sokka’s shoulders slump. “It’s just a big grassy hill!”

“For now.” Azula replies.

“For now!?” Sokka throws his hands up. “What does that even mean?”

Azula offers him a smug and cheerful smile. “You’ll see.” She unfurls the picnic blanket and lays it out across the grass. “I figured that since I made you walk all of this way, that’s I’d make your favorite…”

“Peppered komodo chicken with a touch of garlic and a side of…”

“Smoked seal jerky.” Azula fills in. “Yes.” She withdraws a pan, a cooking fork, and a small iron grate to rest the meat upon. She gathers herself a nice tent of firewood and lights it up.

.oOo.

The last of the sizzles and pops die away as the sun fully falls. Azula does not relight it and Sokka shudders, it is quite darker than he had imagined. But Azula seems entirely unbothered which he might have found reassuring if Azula wasn’t unbothered by most things.

She passes his meal to him. “Enjoy.”

He will certainly try but the sounds emitting from the shadows–the ones that Azula insists are just lemurs and screech hog-monkeys don’t make it easy. He watches Azula, ever unphased, lay herself belly-down across the picnic blanket. She rests her chin in her palms and gazes down the hill.

“It’s firefly mating season.” She remarks at last.

Sokka swallows his mouthful. “Good to know, I guess.”

Azula rolls her eyes and sighs. “Every few years there’s a firefly boom.” She elaborates. “It kind of reminds me of the polar lights. Less colorful, more uniformed but it’s like looking at stars but they’re in the grass.” She gestures down the hill where the first flashes are finally beginning.

“I’ve seen Water Tribe winters.” She continues. “So I thought that I would show you what a Fire Nation summer is like when it is at its finest…” There is something in her voice, in the way that she trails off. It makes Sokka’s stomach sink. He is being unenthusiastic and he thinks that it is cracking her confidence in this thing that she had been so excited to show him.

He wants to be enthusiastic but he has seen fireflies before so many times. He can’t say that this is any different from what he is used to seeing. A few drifting clouds of fireflies. It is pretty for certain but he isn’t sure if it is worth a long trek through the jungle. But Azula’s smiles are worth it.

She is not smiling right now. Rather the opposite. “There are usually more than this…” She bites her lower lip.

Sokka’s heart sinks further. He puts a hand on her back. “It’s alright, Azula. It’s still nice.” It is quality time with her and a meal that she had taken the care to cook for him. It has been prepared and is being eaten with breathtaking scenery, however ordinary it is. “It doesn’t have to be…”

“But I wanted to show you something special.” She mumbles.

“This is special.” He insists.

“But you’ve seen this before.”

“I’ve seen something similar but I’ve never seen these fireflies and they never dance around in the same way.”

Azula shrugs.

“How many times did I take you to see the polar light?”

“A lot, Sokka.” She replies.

“And did you enjoy them any less the tenth time?” He quirks a brow.

She purses her lips. “N-no.”

“Well then.” Sokka grins. And her smile starts to return.

.oOo.

Azula isn’t sure what had woke her up but she is pleased that it has. She nudges Sokka. Once then twice. “Sokka.” She whispers. He rolls over and gives a sleepy grunt. “Sokka!” She hisses again with a harder nudge.

“Wha-uh-t!?” He grumble-whines. “Go to sleep, woman!”

This time she gives him a very solid thumb on the back. He jerks awake. “Geez!”

Azula laughs.

“What!? Is someone dying?”

Azula shakes her head. “Look.” She points at the roof of their tent. It is all beaded with firefly bulbs that rest there like glowing yellow raindrops. Now and then the insects crawl down the fabric leaving a glowing trail just as rain leaves a trail of wetness.

“I-it’s completely covered.” Sokka sputters.

Azula nods rather eagerly. She takes his hand. “Come on Sokka, the hill is probably full of them!”

The hills, the canopy, the tree bark. Everything. Clouds of fireflies are suspended over the pond and make themselves cozy in the leaves of cattails.

Sokka blinks. “They’re everywhere.”

Azula nods.

“I’ve never seen so many!”

She nods again and takes his hand. “Come on, Sokka.”

“Where are we going?” He asks. She knows that he will be able to deduce the answer soon enough.

.oOo.

He and Azula wander through the tall grass. It tickles his waist as he wades his way through. Although it is significantly higher on Azula–perhaps reaching her belly button or a little above–she seems to sift through the grass with ease.

Sometimes it is nice to just walk hand in hand with her, letting her lead him along. Tonight she guides him through a field of stars. Each blade of grass seems to be tipped with a firefly bulb or two. And each strand that they part seems to rouse a whole cloud of them into the sky.

Azula extends her arms and cups her hands. When she parts them to let him peer inside he finds that she has come away with at least five or six fireflies.

“This must have been fun for you when you were a kid.”

Azula shakes her head. “Father wouldn’t let us chase them. He didn’t want us to get our robes dirty. We got to look and that was nice enough. But I never had the chance to…” she reaches up and plucks another firefly from the sky.

Never had the chance to be a kid. He can see as much on her face. And he realizes that, technically, this is a first time for her too. A childhood dream coming to life.

“Who do you think can catch more?” Azula quirks a brow.

“I can of course.” He declares. “I’m taller so I can reach more of them.”

“But I’m faster.” Azula counters. And he can’t dispute that. She has reflexes on top of that and this easy, fluid way of maneuvering through the world around her. She does a half twirl to look back at him. There are fireflies in her locks and crawling on her billowing robes, over her outstretched arms.

She doesn’t even have to lift an arm to catch the fireflies.

He can’t see himself but he imagines that he is similarly dressed in fireflies. Any traces of sleepiness ebb right out of him.

If he falls asleep now, he fears that he will never see something like this again.

Azula holds her hand out and he takes it.

Just as he had held her hand when he introduced her to the lights.

He has shown her the winter and she has showed him the summer.

He will show her the grand melting of a Water Tribe springtime and she will introduce him to a burning Fire Nation autumn.

#avatar the last airbender #azula #sokka #sokkla #azula week 2023 #azula week #fanfiction

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radiokathryn-if · 1 year

Text

Directory☯︎

Tag Breakdown and Answered Asks List~

Main Tags:

Blog tag──radio kathryn Secondary tag──radio kathryn if

LI Tags:

Nathan Nicholson──c: nate nicks Evangeline Vidal──c: eva vidal Micael/a Hollens──c: mica hollens Han Ji Min──c: detective han Jose/phine Jeager──c: josé danger Han Ji Young──c: ji han Faye-Mauve Langham──c: fauve Jackson Lewis──c: jackson lewis ???──c: ???

Poly Tags:

Eva&&&???──poly: evijah Ji Han&&&Fauve──poly: jauve

Cast Tags:

Lionel Robinson──c: mr robinson MC tag──the sound tech MCs mother tag──techies mum

Misc Tags:

Priscilla Lewis──c: cilly lewis Marisol García──c: marisol Han Jang Mi──c: mum han

Answered Asks:

About The Game──general About The Cast──discussions Sneak Peaks Of The Game──first look Self Reblogs──follow up All LI/ROs──all ros About Music──the playlist NSFW──not safe for radio

GENERAL

Demo ETA? [ here ]

ALL ROs

[ extended masterlist here ]

INDIVIDUAL ROs

Nate

Nate's RO Route. [ here ]

(kiss series) angry kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) kisses on the rain [ here ]

(kiss series) neck kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) kissing eachother breathless [ here ]

(kiss series) fake kisses [ here ]

(the bed series) “we’re roommates and you drunkenly passed out in my bed; move over I’m coming in” [ here ]

(the bed series) “we fell asleep on the couch, watching a movie and wake up entangled with each other” [ here ]

(the bed series) “there was a big party at some people’s house and we wake up in the same bed together, what happened?” [ here ]

Nate and being In Love [ here ]

Indifferent MC! [ here ]

Nate Lore™️ [ here ]

Nate's Red Flags [ here ]

Eva

(kiss series) hushed conversation in between kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) passionate kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) forever mine kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) french kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) thigh kisses [ here ]

(the bed series) “we fell asleep on the couch, watching a movie and wake up entangled with each other” [ here ]

(the bed series) “sharing a bed used to be quite normal for us, when did that change?” [ here ]

Three Facts ft Fauve [ here ]

Mica

(kiss series) kisses for comfort [ here ]

(kiss series) desperate kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) first kiss [ here ]

Three Facts ft Fauve [ here ]

Detective Han

(kiss series) frustrated kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) welcome home kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) kisses down the others body [ here ]

(kiss series) relieved kisses [ here ]

Five Fun Facts [ here ]

(the bed series) “there was a big party at some people’s house and we wake up in the same bed together, what happened?” [ here ]

(the bed series) “the bed is big enough for two people without touching, but unfortunately there is only one blanket” [ here ]

(the bed series) “you woke me up screaming from a nightmare, and I’m tired, so let’s cuddle so the nightmares don’t come anymore” [ here ]

José

(kiss series) reassuring kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) morning kisses [ here ]

(the bed series) “you woke me up screaming from a nightmare, and I’m tired, so let’s cuddle so the nightmares don’t come anymore” [ here ]

Ji Han

(kiss series) calming kisses [ here ]

(kiss series) kissing away tears [ here ]

(kiss series) neck kisses [ here ]

(the bed series) “we fell asleep on the couch, watching a movie and wake up entangled with each other” [ here ]

(the bed series) “we're snowed in and there is not a lot of space and heat” [ here ]

(the bed series) “you woke me up screaming from a nightmare, and I’m tired, so let’s cuddle so the nightmares don’t come anymore” [ here ]

Ji Han and MC's top surgery scars [ here ]

Five Facts [ here ]

Fauve

Three Facts ft Mica [ here ]

Three Facts ft Eva [ here ]

Jackson

(kiss series) morning kisses [ here ]

???

nothing as of yet

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nebulousnajm · 2 years

Text

let’s get married (for legal benefits) – a scarabedo ficlet

G rating – 510 words. ao3 link at the end

––

Albedo has been trying to fall asleep for a while now, but his mind is forgoing rest in favor of chasing a certain thought round and round in his head. Not even the steady snowfall he’s watching through the bedroom window can guide him to the land of nod.

His eyes drop to his partner’s supposedly sleeping form next to him, but he can tell that Kunikuzushi isn’t asleep yet either. The probability of him also thinking of the same thing at the moment is extremely small, but it doesn’t matter.

“Kuni?”

“Hm?”

“I think we should get married for the legal benefits.”

Kunikuzushi doesn’t miss a beat. “Not for love?” He asks teasingly.

It gets a quiet laugh out of him. “We’re already married that way, don’t you think? What difference is there between us and a legally married couple? We share a house and a life, we split the chores, and we have two cats.” In fact, one of said cats is currently curled up at the foot of their bed.

Kunikuzushi hums. “I guess you’re right.”

A moment of silence passes, and then Kunikuzushi asks, “would you still want a wedding?”

Oh. “Is that a yes then?”

He scoffs, but his smile is audible. “Of course it’s a yes; you have a point… and I love you.”

Even after all this time, Kunikuzushi is still slightly abashed when it comes to giving form to his feelings, but it makes him smile. Albedo doesn’t mind – he has no need for the words when he has everything else. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t hold them close to his chest anyway.

Easily finding Kunikuzushi’s hand under the blanket despite the dark, he gives it a gentle squeeze. “I love you too.”

“As for the wedding,” Albedo doesn’t care much for big flashy celebrations, but… “I wouldn’t mind either way, but I think Alice would kill me if she weren’t there to see me get married.”

Kunikuzushi chuckles. “A small wedding then. Just us and the people that should know.”

He sounds like he’s already imagining the event, and it endears Albedo to no end. His partner (fiancé now?) may put up an aloof front, but Albedo has been with him long enough by now to know that he’s one for flair and sentiment.

Kunikuzushi's thumb passes over Albedo's ring finger. “Do you know what your ring size is?”

He thinks about it for a moment, but he’s never been one for rings, though this one will definitely be an exception. “No, I can’t say I do. I don’t think I’ve worn rings before.”

Discussing rings turns into considering invitations and then locations which leads to guests and then photos. Although Albedo suggested marriage for the legal benefits, he and Kunikuzushi end up spending the next hour going back and forth over various preparations instead of sleeping.

Drowsiness catches up with them eventually, and they decide to continue the conversation at a more reasonable time.

Finally falling asleep, the last thoughts Albedo has are of what he’ll say for his vows.

–– https://archiveofourown.org/works/43833603

#my writing #mine #genshin impact #scarabedo #albescara #scaramouche/albedo #albedo/scaramouche #scaramouche x albedo #albedo x scaramouche

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shadowsobscurity · 1 year

Text

The monarch's little honeymoon

Summary: The day of Jude and Cardan's wedding anniversary, The Bomb decides to prepare them a surprise

The Bomb was waiting for the king and queen to come outside, standing in the gardens. The sun shone as the couple exited the castle, walking hand in hand. She waved at them, smiling at the sweetness of their love.

She had known Cardan long before Jude did,and the change she saw in his behavior was astonishing. He had gone from being a lonely bastard to a sweet loving husband.

Jude was the first to talk, she didn't know why they were here, so she asked.

-Please Jude, be patient. I have a lot of surprises for today-

She might not care, but today was the day Jude and Cardan got married, and it was a waste of the opportunity not doing something special. She had prepared an excursion to the lake, but first they would stop to have a picnic in the forest.

The Bomb guided them through the gardens, until they arrived at the stables. Before they got on the horses, Cardan asked:

-Where are we going? There is a lot of business I need to take care of and if it isn't important I am leaving-

-Don't worry about your obligations today, if gotten people to take care of them-

He rolled his eyes, but seemed to accept. He got on a horse, and Jude, instead of taking another one, she sat behind him.

The bomb led the path, while the couple was following her.

-As you might remember, today is your wedding anniversary- she started- and as I know you don't want to make it public, I've prepared a leisure day with the court of Shadows-

While she said this, two more horses appeared on the path, The Roach and The Ghost were riding next to The Bomb.

After a short ride a beautiful meadow appeared in front of them. Everyone got down from the horses and tied them to a tree. The Bomb took a little basket and opened it, revealing a small meal and a blanket.

They laid the blanket on the floor and prepared the picnic. Everyone sat down and they shared some time together. Jude and Cardan were sitting together, talking lower between themselves and laughing at their inside jokes.

Little time had passed when Cardan got up saying:

-I wish it doesn't bother you to wait for us, we are going somewhere -

No one seemed to oppose it, so they left the group. The Bomb was extremely curious to know what they were going to do, so she waited a prudent time and followed them.

It wasn't difficult, their laughter could be heard from a mile away. She arrived at a big tree, knowing that she couldn't get nearer because they were behind. She stood on her side of the tree, observing the couple as they chased each other. Jude was running while Cardan ran away from her. She held a bottle full of water, and both were laughing. A sound full of joy, different from the contained laughter they made in the court. Today they weren't king and queen, they were just two teenagers in love, without responsibilities that weren't according to their age. After some time, she decided it was enough of spying on them, so she went back to the meadow and spent the time with the Roach and the Ghost.

When Cardan and Jude came back, they were soaked. No one said anything, they just stared with a smile.

The Bomb was excited to get to the lake

-Untie the horses, there is still another surprise left-

They followed her, arriving at a small and private lake.

Jude and Cardan didn't say anything, they just jumped off the horse and started striping. The Ghost quickly got off as well and grabbed the spare horse, tying them again in a tree. He copied the couple and dived into the lake. The Roach and the Bomb didn't take much to follow them.

Jude was swimming distractedly and Cardan watched her with a grin, definitely planning something. He seemed to decide that the previous water fight wasn't enough, because he started chasing her, while splashing everyone around. As soon as Jude saw her, she started swimming away while laughing. When Cardan catched her, she started running after the Ghost, who had no other option than swim away.

They spent the afternoon on that lake,and when the sun started to go down, they laid on the grass

-Thanks Bomb, it definitely was worth it- Cardan said, while holding Jude on his arms.

#jude duarte #jude x cardan #high queen jude #cardan x jude #jude #cardan duarte #cardan my beloved #cardanandjude #cardan greenbriar

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adashulaz · 5 months

Text

Another fic snippet

Félix sat on a couch with Yaoyorozu on the other side. It was silent, the only noise coming from the kitchen. “So you two synced up?” Adrien sounded confused.

Adrien was even more confused when he learned that Félix was trans because of this. Apparently Adrien just assumed Félix was born without an Adam's Apple. “It seems so.” Yaoyorozu spoke for him. He only shifted slightly, no one was meant to find out like this. “At least nothing got blood on it!” Midoriya sounded cheerful. It made him want to groan out loud, instead he stayed silent.

“Which is lucky since it probably would've stained since laundry is going to be done tomorrow.” Marinette pointed out as she walked into the room with Bakugou behind her. He glanced at the two, they had a few things of food in their arms. He only looked away from them, the idea of eating made him sick. “We made you guys some food.” Bakugou was quieter than normal. Maybe he realized yelling made people hate his guts.

“Thank you, that's really sweet of you.” Yaoyorozu sounded sickenly sweet. It made Félix want to gag, maybe this period was just making him extra irritated by everything around him. He watched as Marinette and Bakugou set the things of food down. His eyes were focused on the options before him. “It's no problem Momo, I'm always happy to help my friends.” Félix looked up to see Marinette smile a bit.

He only looked away before she could notice his staring. His eyes went back to the food. “It's not poisoned.” He glanced at the usually annoyed blonde before looking back at the food. “If it's made by Marinette then I wouldn't assume it is, she is dating my cousin after all. It would look bad on her part if she made an attempt to kill me.” His tone came out harsher than he meant it to.

He shifted slightly once again. “Well you guys can eat this, any of you can. I'm gonna make some more with the help of Bakugou.” Marinette sounded anxious as she dragged Bakugou back into the kitchen. He only glanced around the room, Kaminari had a remote in hand. “You guys wanna watch something?” He only hummed as everyone else gave a verbal agreement.

He barely gave them attention as they tried to decide on something to watch. He only rested his elbow on the arm of the couch as he rested his cheek in his palm. He closed his eyes, he could rest his eyes for a small bit as the others argued over what to watch.

__________________________

Momo was able to help her classmates and friends decide on something to watch with the help of Iida. With his help, they were able to create a voting system so they could pick. In the end, they were watching lego movies. She smiled as the group watched the first movie with the same excitement of a small child, obviously not all of them but it did warm her heart to see them all getting along.

She gave the blonde on the couch with her a small glance. It quickly turned into a full stare. The blonde was passed out, using the arm of the couch as a makeshift pillow. She only looked at the blanket she had on her lap, it was a weighted blanket that she made. She made it big enough so they could both share it in case he would also like something weighted. She didn't make two because she only had breakfast and a few snacks, making two would make her sick.

She moved closer to the blonde, sharing the blanket with him. He only shifted slightly. She moved her attention back to the TV as she got herself comfortable. Marinette and Bakugou would move between the kitchen and the living area. She grabbed a small snack from the table, simple macarons that Marinette made for them.

By the third movie, Marinette and Bakugou joined them in the living area. Enough food on the table in front of the couch to feed a small army. “Thank you for making food.” Momo could see as Marinette blushed a bit as she cuddled up with Sabrina. Bakugou didn't show any form of embarrassment as he just gave a small dismissive wave of his hand. “It's the least we could do Yaoyorozu.” Marinette gave a small smile.

Momo only smiled back. “Still, it's very kind of both of you to do it when you didn't have to.” Momo grabbed another macaron and took a bite.

#fanfic #miraculous ladybug #my hero academia #my fic #fic snippet #crossover #rarepair #crackship

0 notes

transienturl · 10 months

Text

strange things to be inspired by a dream: hypothetical apology by a tv personality for using hurtful language on-air

Hey, guys. I want to apologize for the language I used on air last night: to those it's most hurtful to especially, but to every viewer who heard my comments and everyone who's not a viewer of our show who's gonna have been exposed to this due to the coverage too. And you know who that goes double to, who that goes triple to? The people who aren't bothered, aren't offended; the people who think this kind of stuff is fine. It's not—not today, not ever. Having people like me who have a platform talk like it is, even in passing, sets us back. It makes people, wonderful people, want to hide who they are—I'm not okay with contributing to that. And the reason I say this goes triple for the people who think they don't care is that you almost certainly know many of those wonderful people, whoever you are, whether you're aware of it or not. Whoever you are, the fact that you live in a society with this kind of ugly thinking, where this kind of ugly thinking is sometimes treated like it's not a big deal or that it's inevitable? That's hurting you. That's hurting you directly. We should never accept halfhearted apologies for this shit because the consequences are real. People shouldn't have to grow up in a world where they feel like who they are affects how much they're loved—by their friends, their family, their god if they believe in one... or by some guy on TV. Or by their sports heroes, the people they watch up here every night. I know sometimes we in the sports world get a pass on this sort of—look, it feels and is ridiculous to use a blanket term like "cultural issue," but I have to—but we get a pass on this kind of thing because it's "just sports," because sports doesn't really matter, because we're paid to compete and talk about competing, not to be politicians. Whatever. That's bullshit, okay? You shouldn't accept that, and I shouldn't accept that, and I'm upset with myself for contributing to it, for all the takes I'm already seeing defending my comments along those lines. Sport gives us a platform. Sport lets us represent our fans, our cities, our countries. It's our job to do everything we can—within the rules—to win on the field. But it's also our duty to do everything we can as members of this community, as friends to those we know and don't know, to fight for the people who are unfairly victims of this hate that should have died a long damn time ago. Don't accept otherwise, not because we're 'just' sports. Hold us accountable. Please. I wanna say thank you to everyone who's made their voice heard the right way, here, whether it's about me personally or not.

And I want to apologize to another group of people: my old teammates, everybody I shared a locker room with. I'm sorry my comments make it sound like we had a culture of hate back in those days. And I'm sorry to those of you who were hurt by some of the language we did use in the locker room. I'm pissed, honestly, at myself, you know? Because there was always this voice in my head that was like, I've gotta stop this, I've gotta stop this, and the excuse was, you know, I'll stop once I leave the league. And obviously I didn't quite succeed at that—but more importantly, that's not enough. That's not fair to the people I was with in the moment. If you find yourself in that locker room or wherever it is that those things get said behind closed doors, and you find yourself thinking, you know, now's not the time to speak up, to be better: nah man, just do it. Be brave. That's the bravest thing you can do. Trust me: it sucks way more to be thinking back on stuff you let slide years later, okay? Don't do that to yourself. Don't do it to your friends, to your loved ones, to the strangers who overhear you. It's not okay. Don't listen to anybody—anybody—who makes you feel like it is.

(Oh, and I'm donating a bunch of money. Please consider joining me.)

0 notes

missmonsters2 · 3 years

Note

today I feel awful... idk my insecurities are taking over me and I just want to curl into a ball and cry. maybe it's my hormones maybe the fact that I weighted myself and found out I gained weight (I can't fit into my jeans 😭) and the fact that I saw my sister in a tight skin dress looking perfect while I'm in my pj's just destroyed my confidence. I need something angsty to read to make me forget about my sad, miserable lffe right now. would you be down in writing sth angsty with nat maybe? you don't have to though. it's fine either way. I really appreciate all of your work and I keep reading on repeat whenever I'm feeling down. makes me cheer up. thank you, van ❤️

It's like we're the same person because I also went to visit my sister recently and my sister has gotten her life together and is living her best hot girl bod while I...let's not go there.

I just want you to know that you're hot as fuck and a body is just a body that we can change with time and effort. We're lit rally in this together. This time next year, we will be rocking the body that makes up happy and we'll be healthy!!! 💘💘

But I will still give you nat angst...but with a happy ending bc I said you deserve a HEA!!

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

The Withers of Springtime Bloom

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Spring is a time of blooming and when things come back to life. You can't help but notice things that may be causing your relationship with Natasha to wither.

Warnings: self-esteem issues, insecurities about body, relationship with working out and food, seasonal depression. angst with HEA.

Count: 2.1k~

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

You're not sure when things changed.

Things change so slowly after all.

Without you noticing, things change and change and change until one day, you do notice.

You notice that Natasha has become quieter, somber.

You notice the lack of date nights and affectionate touches.

You notice that you've let yourself go a little.

You're standing in front of the mirror, staring at your body with a frown. You've gained weight since dating Natasha, but relationship weight gain was normal, wasn't it?

But you remember how Natasha was just as fit as she was before she met you. Sure, she was a superhero, and you were a regular civilian; there was no reason for you to train long hours as Natasha did.

Still...

You turn to the side and peer at yourself in the mirror again.

You can't help but wonder...were you becoming less attractive to her?

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

It had been the beginning of fall when you met Natasha. You loved the season of change and when things turned into warm colors before withering away for winter to come.

Natasha had come like a blessing, and in the winter, she was just warm as the colors of fall. Instead of withering away, she bloomed and invested that warmth in your relationship with her.

Despite always being an early riser to work out, weekends were the days she stayed in bed with you just a little longer. There had been so many breakfasts, lunch, and dinner dates. You found yourself moving things around or neglecting to work around her busy schedule.

Perhaps that was when things began to change. Eating out so often and forgoing working out to spend time with Natasha was what led to this.

Spring has arrived, and things are coming back to life. Yet somehow, your relationship with Natasha was withering away.

"Hey," you greet her as you come home, shopping bags in hand. You bought some more clothes when things felt like they didn't fit comfortably anymore. The experience had been upsetting for you, and you didn't end up buying too much, telling yourself you didn't want to spend too much when you were going to lose the weight.

Natasha was working in her office, peering down over reports, and barely acknowledged you other than with a hum.

"Long day?" You ask her as you put your things away and walk over to her.

"Yeah," Natasha sighed. "Trying to get these reports done since Maria needs them tomorrow."

That had been Natasha's excuse for spending long hours in her office every night for the last two weeks.

You place your hand on Natasha's shoulder with a reassuring squeeze, but she leans to the side as if to readjust herself, but still away from your touch.

The sting immediately comes, but you try to push it down, so it doesn't hurt as bad.

"Right," you say hoarsely, but Natasha stares on at the reports. "I'm just going to get ready for bed. It's been a long day and all. Let me know if you need anything."

Natasha gives you a nod as you leave the room. You feel awkward as you lie in the bed you share with her. You wonder if you're taking up too much space.

There's a pang of something as you try to curl yourself to be smaller and only distantly realizing you've skipped dinner before you fall asleep.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

You fall back onto the mat, chest heaving and your lungs burning.

It's been a while since you've worked out, and now you're definitely paying for it with how unfit you are.

The gym is moderately empty with the hour it is. You hate going to a public gym because it always feels like someone is staring, but it's better for strangers to stare than working out at the Compound for people you know to stare at you.

The rational part of you knows that you should just talk to Natasha, but the emotional side of you whispers that you won't like what Natasha has to say, that she might even end it before you've had a chance to change yourself.

When weeks pass, and you weigh yourself again, you almost start crying because you've only lost a couple of pounds.

It's normal, you know it is. You're losing weight at a normal rate, but it's not enough. You know fast weight loss wouldn't make sense for your body but you also feel you don't have half a year to go back to your normal weight.

You sit on the bathroom floor for hours, debating what to do when you hear a quiet knock.

"Sweetheart, are you in there?" Natasha's muffled voice comes through.

You wipe at your eyes furiously as you stand up.

"Y-Yeah," you answer back. "I'm just in the tub soaking."

There's a moment of silence through the door before Natasha answers back, "Alright. Enjoy yourself. Did you want me to order anything specific for dinner?"

"No, it's okay," you tell her. "You order anything you want. I already ate on my way home." You think about the chicken salad you've been eating for the past two weeks and almost sigh.

Natasha answered that she just came back to see if you've eaten, but she actually had to head back to the Compound. You were Natasha shuffling around before leaving through the front door, and you let out the breath you were holding.

You actually take a long, hot shower before putting on sweats and a big hoodie.

The truth was, you were hungry. The chicken salad was okay on the way home, but it had been a couple of hours since.

You knew starving yourself wasn't the answer, so you went into the kitchen to see if you could find something healthy to hold you over until you could go to bed.

But you can't find anything in the fridge except for Natasha's leftovers from whatever she ordered the day before. You can't find anything except frozen pizzas and microwavable foods.

You check the calories on the back and let out a frustrated sigh. Checking your watch, you realize it's too late in the evening to go grocery shopping because, by the time you get there, stores will have closed.

You slump down on the floor, leaning against the cabinets as you let out a pathetic whimper while your eyes became hot with tears.

You miss Natasha. You want Natasha holding you and telling you it would be okay. But you couldn't have that until you were back to what you were when you met her.

The front door suddenly opens.

"Have you seen my—sweetheart?" Natasha started to call before she noticed you sitting on the floor. "What's wrong?"

You use your sleeve to wipe at your eyes as you sit up straight.

"Nothing," you sniffle before you start to stand. "I just stubbed my toe against the edge of the kitchen island. What were you looking for? USB? You left it next to the bedside."

Natasha stares at your back, hair still wet as she takes in your attire.

"It's a little hot to be wearing a hoodie and sweats, isn't it?" Natasha asks softly. "Doesn't seem like you turned on the aircon in here."

You keep walking, but Natasha starts to follow you.

"'m cold," you say quietly so she can't hear the tremble in your voice.

"Are you feeling sick?" Natasha asks with concern as you sit down on the couch, turning on the TV. You pull the blanket over you as if to make your point.

"No," you tell her because you don't want her to worry. "Just cold after a bath."

Natasha sets her things down before she takes a seat next to you. Even in the low lighting, she can see your eyes rimmed red and dampness of them.

You're refusing to look at her as you have your knees drawn up to your chest and stare stubbornly at the TV screen.

Then she hears it.

Your stomach grumbles.

"Are you hungry, sweetheart?" Natasha asks softly again. "We can just order food and stay in tonight."

Your cheeks grow hot. "Don't you have to be at the Compound?"

You don't mean to snap at her, but you can't help but feel embarrassed.

Natasha remains quiet for a moment, quickly thinking over the last few weeks before she feels guilt trickle in.

She doesn't remember the last time she ate with you—doesn't remember the last time she saw you eat.

"Sweetheart," she calls you gently again, and you bristle at the tone. "Is there something wrong?"

The fragile dam you've built to keep the weeks of compiling emotions at bay breaks, and you're hurtling down the stream over the waterfall.

"Are you not in love with me anymore?" You choke out as you begin to cry.

You can't even register to feel horrified at your breakdown because you just need to know.

"I know...I know my body has changed since we first met and I've gained weight but I really am trying to lose it. I just—I feel like you're avoiding me. At first, I thought things at work have been really stressful for you, and I wanted to give you space but you're gone all the time. You're gone even when you're here."

Natasha can barely understand anything you've said after hearing you say the first part. Her breath hitches painfully in the back of her throat, and she legitimately feels appalled at herself.

She starts to say something, but you keep going.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to make this about me because if you're going through something then I want to support and be there for you. But I can't help but feel like you're grossed out by me. I mean—I feel grossed out when I look at myself. I feel like I'm taking up so much space—"

Natasha cuts you off abruptly, pulling off the blanket as she pulls at you until you're in her lap.

"Nat—"

"You're not gross and this is not about the weight you have or have not gained. You hear me?" Natasha says forcefully as she holds you close to her, hand over your thigh to keep you against her.

"God, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry if I've been making you feel like you're not attractive me," Natasha's eyes well up as your tears wet her shoulder. "You're literally still the most gorgeous person I've ever met and you're always going to be that to me."

Natasha's hand at your waist dips underneath your hoodie, her fingers trailing up your back as she sighs at your warmth. "I should've told you, but the springtime is just really hard for me. It's odd because it's a time for things to come back to life but some of the worst things have happened to me during the spring and things blooming makes me think about things that aren't coming back. I think it's also just a little bit of seasonal depression too. I'm just the rare percentage that gets it in the spring."

The explanation makes your body sag with relief because while you feel so horrible that there is a reason Natasha doesn't like spring, she's not falling out of love with you.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize that I was hurting you," Natasha apologizes again. "I didn't mean to be so distant but I didn't want to bring your mood down as well, which is why I've been working so much to keep busy."

"It's okay," you muttered as your turn your head, forehead pressed against her neck. "I'm sorry spring is depressing for you."

Natasha merely hushes you as she kisses the side of your head.

You begin to feel awkward, thinking about how you must be heavy on her and try to move, but Natasha doesn't let you.

"Sweetheart, I don't know how to convince you that you're perfect to me," Natasha says so seriously as she forces you to look at her. "If you want to lose weight because that is what you want, then I support you. But I need you to understand that I love you no matter what. I don't care either way because you're so fucking lovely to me always. Do you understand?"

Timidly, you reply, "Okay. Thank you."

Natasha presses her lips against yours in a long kiss before she pulls back.

"Now, I'm going to ask again. Are you hungry? We can order in and watch that new show on Netflix I heard was pretty good from Wanda."

You feel lighter. You think you might still want to work out because that would make you happy, but you don't feel the rush like you did just a couple of hours ago.

"Yeah," you say shyly. "But maybe something not so heavy?"

Natasha nods as she presses another kiss into your cheek as she helps you settle onto the couch right beside her to grab her phone.

"Anything to make you bloom."

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanoff oneshot #black widow x reader #black widow x you #black widow imagine #avengers imagine #avengers x reader #mm: my fics #g.angst #g.fluff

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batfamtv · 4 years

Text

i work for her

summary: batmom meets the justice league

bruce wayne x fem!reader

word count: 1508

"Shall I fetch you some tea?"

You smiled from where you sat, and turned your chair to face Alfred, "Yes please. I don't know why I'm so tired already, I'm normally up and about at this time.”

Alfred chuckled knowingly, “Well, being a full-time wife of the Batman will wear one too eventually.” He walked to you, taking a peek at the numerous monitors you turned back to look at. “And it’s not even midnight yet.”

At the sound of the stone wall sliding open and elevator descending, you turned around to look. Alfred did too, but immediately turned to face you, about to inform you that he will be leaving you for a while to make some tea, but--

“Wow! This is awesome!”

Alfred did a double-take. You raised your brows. Bruce wasn’t alone. He was with the other metahumans, smiling tiredly with his cowl in his hand. “Brought some friends.”

While the other metahumans inspected the batcave, your husband was quick to approach you, giving you a warm smile. You reached from your seat to take his cowl and place it on the table, and bring your hand back to his, squeezing it lightly. “Missed you.”

His smile brightened, squeezing your hand back.

Alfred reached beside you to grab Bruce’s cowl, mumbling about making sure there was no damage to it.

You noticed the young, elated kid who was observing the batcave with fascination. This must be Barry Allen. Diana you’ve already met, but the rest not yet--at least, not personally. You’ve only gotten to know who they were from the research you helped conduct.

Bruce called to the others, “Everyone, this is Alfred and Y/N. I work for them.”

Diana approached you and Alfred, patting the latter in acknowledgment. You shuffled to get out of the chair you had curled into, but Diana quickly stopped you before you could get up, “No, Y/N. Stay.” She smiled at you.

“Thanks, Di,” you smiled back gratefully and with a nod, Diana excused herself. Victor Stone was walking behind Diana, only giving you and Alfred a stiff nod.

“Oh,” Alfred shared a nervous glance at you before following Victor again with his eyes. You lightly shook your head in amusement.

Barry Allen looked very excited to meet you and Alfred, raising both of his hands to wave at you, one hand waving at Alfred enthusiastically, and the other extending to wave at you. “Hi, Batman’s bosses!” You opened your mouth to correct him, but he was already gone in a flash.

Finally, Arthur Curry passed by you and Alfred, “This is badass guys,” before giving you a thumbs-up and following after the others.

Alfred looked so surprised seeing these many people in the batcave again after all this time. You grinned at him when he gave you a look, clearly showing his surprise. “Well, I’ll put on the tea. I was going to get Mistress Wayne and me some.”

“Great,” Bruce glanced at his new teammates, almost feeling a little awkward to see a lot of people occupying his batcave.

“I don’t know where we’re gonna find the cups,” Alfred replied, shrugging.

“Ooh, remember that tea set I got from Bludhaven? Those were nice,” you suggested. Alfred nodded, thinking, “I do, but wasn’t those destroyed when the Dami--”

“I think there’s enough left,” you told Alfred, “I’ll help you look.”

Alfred brought his hands up, gesturing for you to stop. “Please, Mistress Wayne, I got this. You can do me the favor of resting to revitalize yourself.”

You waved him off, rolling your eyes teasingly. “I’m fine, I just need some of your tea, Alfred.” He nodded appreciatively and excused himself.

Beside you, Bruce turned to look at you, moving from holding your hand to lean down to plant a quick kiss on your temple. You smiled and held his face, planting a small kiss on his cheek. “Alfred’s right, you should be resting.”

“I will,” you nodded, reassuring him. “I’ll have some tea and take a quick nap.”

“We might be leaving not too long after.”

“Then, I’ll see you off.” You smiled, caressing his cheek with your thumb. Bruce leaned into your touch, before glancing at the team and back to you again. You chuckled at how Bruce Wayne, the Batman, was subtly trying to excuse himself to return to his team, albeit reluctantly, “Go, silly! I’ll be here.” He gave you another kiss and walked over to the others.

On the team’s downtime, waiting for Victor to fix the aircraft, Bruce was watching you sleep, finding comfort in your relaxed face. Diana walked over to Bruce, nudging him, “You should take her upstairs to rest.”

“I would, but I know she’ll get mad.”

“How is she?”

Bruce sighed, “She’s tired all the time. I told her she should just rest, but she insists on helping us.” He smiled at Y/N lovingly, then scowled, as if remembering something unpleasant.

Diana furrowed her eyebrows, “What is it?”

“Uh…” he glanced at her, unsure whether he should divulge. He hadn’t told this to anyone outside the family, “I had a dream, like, I don’t know, almost like a premonition. It was the end of the world, and Barry Allen was right here,” he gestured to the spot Y/N was occupying, “and he said to me ‘Lois Lane is the key.’” He made a face, glancing at Diana, almost looking for advice on what this dream meant.

Diana shrugged half-heartedly, “She is… to Superman. Every heart has one.” She smiled, almost bittersweet, remembering hers. Bruce glanced to Y/N again, almost ready to agree with Diana and drop the conversation.

Despite that, however, he continued, “I think it’s something more. Something darker.” Worry was etched across his face. He hoped Diana was right. He hoped he was wrong.

A while later, you woke up from your nap to see the team and Alfred walking to the elevator. “Is it time to go already?”

Bruce looked at you guiltily, you looked so comfortable all curled up in the chair, he didn’t want to wake you. “Yeah, time to go.” He and Alfred, along with the others are on the platform now, ready to ascend to the top of the waterfall.

With a sigh, you rolled your neck and removed the blanket you buried yourself into. Bruce smiled when you waddle towards him.

Victor, Arthur, and Barry all shared the exact same looks, gawking at you and your pregnant belly. With one hand resting on top of your belly, you laughed at their shocked faces as the platform ascended.

“Wait, what? You’re very pregnant!” Barry exclaimed.

“I am!” You nodded excitedly, “I’m not due anytime soon, though. I’m just big.”

“Don’t you...I don’t know...Shouldn’t you file for maternity leave? You should be resting!” Barry replied, glancing at you and your tummy worriedly. With that, Alfred and Bruce both looked at you with the expression, “See? That’s what we’ve been trying to tell you.”

“Well, the Batman never rests…” you glance at your husband, “and neither does his wife.”

“Wife?” Barry was even more shocked. “I can’t believe Batman is married!” He glanced at Bruce before turning back to you, “Can I touch your belly?” Barry asked, looking like he was going to vibrate with excitement. You nodded, laughing lightly, “Sure, but the baby is sleeping, so no kicks.”

The platform ascended to the very top, the aircraft on top of you. You stared at it in disbelief, Bruce had tried for the longest time to fix it, and now it was here, fully operational. You turned to your husband, “You fixed it?”

Bruce shook his head, tilting his head to Victor. You turned to Victor, “You fixed it! Thank you!”

Victor nodded, “It wanted to fly. Flight is its nature.” Bruce nodded at him, grateful, “Yours too.”

Barry was still talking excitedly to your tummy, finally saying goodbye to the baby. He looked up at you and smiled, “Thank you!”

“Take care, Barry,” you smiled at him. Arthur turned to you, giving you a shaka sign before joining Barry to the aircraft.

Bruce turned to look at you and Alfred. You smiled at him, handing him his cowl. He took it gratefully, before turning to Alfred, “He’ll be here, Alfred. I know it.”

“What makes you so sure?” Alfred asked.

“Faith, Alfred. Faith.” Bruce smiled, looking back to you. “I’ll see you later, Y/N.”

“Will you be here by breakfast?” You asked him jokingly. He grinned and with a light shrug, replied, “Hopefully.”

You laughed, blowing him a kiss as the ramp closed in front of him.

Descending to the Batcave, you were met with an annoyed look on your son’s face, in his suit, wielding a katana. “They already left? I was supposed to come, Ummi!” He huffed, not mad at you but at his dad for leaving him behind.

You leaned down to kiss Damian’s temple, arm around him to guide him to the main house, “It’s a school night, sweetie. Maybe another time.”

a/n: I had a dream about batfleck and now simp mode is on overdrive

#bruce wayne #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne imagine #batman imagine #batman #dceu imagine #justice league imagine #batfamtv #justice league #zsjl #batmom #batmom imagine

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sugar-petals · 3 years

Note

can you give us more thoughts about domestic yoongles? the taemin's one (wich I love) just made me miss the cat boy so much ;o;

i have a phd in househusband yoongi so let me fire out some ideas for ya.

myg at home headcanon

🐱 word count. 1.9k | fluff, slice of life, slight nsfw mentions, x reader, bullet points

The doorbell sound is a recording of Yoongi imitating a doorbell. He’s such a meme. Ceci n'est pas une pipe.

Seemingly, he teaches himself a new recipe every week. To perfection. Yoongi is very particular about sticking to the recipe and wielding his kitchen tools in the right way. He collects knives, olive oil, and still hates cutting onions.

He separates sleep time, work time, and couple time as the holy trinity. For each, he switches his mood.

Blushes easily no matter for how long you’ve been together.

Establishes his own radio show where he DJs at one point.

Yoongi keeps an extreme track on the garbage schedule. He knows exactly what is due when. Separating the trash is a must. That includes sorting out fake friends trying to get between your relationship. Your social circle as a couple is extremely deliberate.

Yoongi deems himself a terrible host for guests. Unless Hoseok is there to drag him out, it's true he rather stays in the kitchen or at the barbecue preparing the menu courses rather than making small talk. He leaves the hospitality bits to you, however you want to go about it.

What he lacks in conversing with guests, he makes up in bed, God is absolutely fair.

He sings and hums pretty often and has his own vernacular of extraterrestrial uwu noises. It's an alphabet that you have to yet decipher but it's incredibly cute.

Self-made paintings everywhere around his house.

Yoongi hasn't gone clubbing since grammar school. The most he does is going to a restaurant at lunch with very close friends. And always in a work context. His private life is so secluded from everything else and paparazzi just don't spot him anywhere, Dispatch thinks he must live abroad.

Very well, he does consider his big ole house a separate country. It's a living organism with a studio, gym, trophy room, small-size basketball court, and vastly equipped kitchen. A home theater as well, he likes American movies (like Inception) and Korean action genres, and you can stream whatever you fancy in there whenever you like.

Yes, he has underwear with cute little bears on.

There's even a little pond in the backyard. Yoongi, Pisces he is, likes fishes after all. Sometimes he sits at the edge of the 'Little Ole Min Lake (LOML)' and stares into the water for literal hours with his chin parked on his palm.

His fridge is so high-tech and futuristic, even Yoongi is rendered clueless by its AI sometimes. The washing machine, too.

Yoongi watches RuPaul’s drag race. What did you expect? He finds it so humorous.

Owns lord knows how many comic collections.

Favorite holiday destination: New York.

Christmas is basically 50% you unveiling new music equipment to him in the garage and Yoongi almost fainting at the sexiness of it. The other 50% is spent holding hands and orgasm after orgasm until the new year since you loose track of time.

Goes on long rants why he’d marry you again every weekend.

Making you presents is his specialty. Always accompanied with a hand-written note. He writes a lot of things by hand for you in general. Texting, basically never. Always on paper.

No sex without a blanket and socks on. Yoongi gets cold very very easily and just doesn’t like showing skin. You buy him a heated blanket for his birthday, he even uses it in his studio chair.

Chronically addicted to making out.

Matching black outfits and glasses.

Laughs at even your worst jokes or phrases you didn’t expect you even uttered.

Yoongi owns the phoniest, most secretive-looking black car ever and nobody knows about it. Even he forgets he owns it, in fact he genuinely acts like it just doesn’t exist. Hilarious. And that guy has a level 1 Korean driver's license. Which allows him to drive trailers and busses and fucking trucks, and construction machines, let that sink in.

It's really a genius curse. Yoongi being put to the test will always deliver but he won't choose to execute his full skillset if he doesn't have to. Well, pragmatic. He's not as phony as he thinks he is, which is even more hilarious.

He uses that behemoth of a car so scarcely because he'd rather have things delivered to his doorstep and he's stingy with gas. Also, he doesn't like traffic and driving because of the traumatic shoulder accident and his tendency to space out. Translation: You drive that thing... that monster... it really is an impressive, fast, and scary machine.

If someone devious ever even remotely manages to invade his privacy and get past the doubly-installed security system, he has enough money to deal with it no matter what.

If it concerns your privacy, he's a red belt. And owns Jin's number if a taekwondo master is required. Jimin's if it needs someone with kendo skills.

If Yoongi needs someone to go on a complete rampage, Jungkook lives just down the block. He can sprint to Yoongi's bunker I mean mansion within 45 seconds. 30 if it's very urgent. 20 if the reward is an instant ramen splurge with Yoongi's black card.

He has a sexy, glamorous sword collection hanging on the living room wall anyways, so. Who the hell is dumb enough to mess with him and his expensive lawyer in the first place.

But just in case, who knows... Yoongi settles matters shruggingly, anonymously, and with cash and he's too exhausted for violence, but don't underestimate his deter-min-ation and network for emergencies. Also, he is Agust D after all.

He will bonk a naughty burglar or kidnapper across the head with a wooden cooking spoon or take him down by throwing a basketball if the situation requires it. Damn, his reflexes are so fast, a feral cat in motion. So, lean back and sip on your drink of choice. Things are cared for.

If Yoongi is the one being kidnapped or a highly skilled stalker invades the property at night when he's fast asleep (nothing can wake this man during certain hours, strong REM right here): Don't forget that honeyboy is a Dodgers fan. There are signed baseball bats everywhere in this damn house.

In that sense, your parents visiting you here for the first time thought you were an undercover thug couple. Not to worry mom and dad, you both just like sports very much okay.

Yoongi walks around in all black clothes and the rooms are all seemingly dark. Even if you live together, you don't know his skin care routine. It's clear to you he's some sort of vampire.

Since Yoongi always forgets to remove his makeup, you made it a habit to wipe it down when he's about to pass out. He won't lie, he enjoys that kind of affection.

Holly is your resident child. You're essentially a family.

He insists to tackle this by himself, Yoongi sees his therapist monthly. Not shifting responsibility is something he's stubborn about and he pours his emotions into writing. You will do conversation about deeper stuff, but he says it's mostly up to him and his own mind. He dislikes burdening you or opening up too much and it's something to respect rather than force him about. If he wants to share a thought, he will. It doesn’t mean he can’t trust you or sucks at communicating (we know that he’s direct). Yoongi simply can’t put that much pain in such few words nor should you alleviate it for him.

Calls from the manager faze Yoongi as much as Jimin is bothered by gravity. If he’s busy kissing your body slow mo, who the hell dares to disturb his worship.

This man had so many let-downs and interpersonal catastrophes in his life, he's super discerning with people. Because he rolls that way, during their first meeting Yoongi uses his psychology certificate on your friends. You see him squint at them, he listens very closely. After they pass the vibe check aka meow radar, he befriends them, too.

Yoongi doodles Grammy trophies everywhere to manifest them.

Yoongi shaves his legs.

All the sex toys he’s ever bought are black. Gotta vibe in style.

He spends ridiculous amounts of time in the studio but he's yours for the remainder of the night, breakfast, and he makes a lavish lunch and dinner.

Um, consider his head parked between your legs. The Hongkong line was not a joke.

Doesn’t mind you squishing his cheeks whenever and for how long you like.

Every other weekend he gets flowers, vouchers, and gifts — not because of fans, they don’t know where his house is, but because he donates so much.

Namjoon often drops by and cleanses the area with his crystals.

Yoongi is a photography major so you can ask him to take professional, ceiling-high black and white shots of you.

Feeding each other food lovingly. Man, this guy got lips.

He set up a library just for you, in the exact historical aesthetic you like the most. Send him the link to any book you want, it's basically in the online shopping cart already. As I said, he wants to make you presents like every week.

Sometimes he sits on the other end studying English videos and vocab while you read. And yes, he's already 95% fluent but pretends being merely intermediate. He knows technical terms even native speakers have never heard of.

He collects pajamas and earrings.

Swears on the phone.

Namjoon being the horniest member is a cover-up story. Yoongi masturbates almost unreasonable amounts of times, by himself and in your arms when going to bed. Not gonna lie, it’s a sight to see his hands at work. He’s almost equally obsessed with fingering you once you ask him.

Yoongi was the one asking you to move in and almost had a nervous meltdown before meeting up with you to tell you just that.

He’s the little spoon and of course a sleeping burrito to hold tight.

Finds you equally attractive in any state or styling. Yoongi practices what he preaches, he always reacts the same and says the same.

Jams out to outrageous beats Namjoon sends him by dancing in the studio. You walk in on him every time. Was embarrassed at first, now you dance along.

Has bought you a life-sized Yoongi pillow and customized you a giant Shooky to hug when he’s not at home over night.

Owned a wine cellar until he quit drinking. Turned it into a piano room instead.

Only you know Yoongi has a serpent and dagger tattoo.

Scrubs the bathroom religiously.

The house smells like restaurant food and his extravagant perfumes half of the time.

Sometimes he has to remind himself he’s married to you and not his coffee machine. He shall be forgiven. You can’t complain that he doesn’t love you enough, nor is he ever not adorable when drinking his latte.

Never wears short sleeves. It can be scorching and he’ll wear a jacket.

Tell him and the cap stays on during sex.

He grows his hair out and puts it in a low bun. The bangs remain.

Yoongi has installed the most fire-proof building in the entire city it seems. That he wanted to be a firefighter when he was young definitely shows. Figures the house has to be protected from heat: His blasting studio music and Yoongi himself are just way too sizzling.

Still melts into a puddle when you kiss his nose.

Couple sunrise watching.

#yoongi #yoongi hc #yoongi x reader #bts #bts x reader #bts hc #yoongi scenario

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angelmavmurdock · 4 years

Text

The Boy Next Door

WARNINGS: SMUT, ORAL (fem+mal), DIRTY TALK, PRAISE, CHOKING, THIGH RIDING, MENTIONS OF DRUGS.

inexperienced!reader x stoner!tom

(inspired by Ginny and Georgia)

The new house was a lot bigger than our last house. But of course that's due to my mother marrying a man 30 years older than her who owns some workout company. She's a gold digger is what I'm trying to say. Ever since I can remember, whatever guy she was dating dictated where we would live, where my brother and I would go to school, what I'd wear, how I'd act and even what friends I had. Or, lack there of. Always being the 'new girl' was beginning to get exhausting so I never really had friends. If I gained any friends then I knew that we'd get close then I'd move and we'd stay in touch for about a month before they move on and forget about me.

y/n. Always the new girl.

"y/n would you help us, please?" Mum asked in an annoyed tone, brushing past me with a box in her hands.

I rolled my eyes and sighed, walking to the car and beginning to lift stuff out and into the house. It was a huge driveway - unnecessarily large - and everyone on the street was the same. Everyone in the town was the same. It was a rich, suburban area. No place I hadn't seen before but we definitely didn't belong. My Mum just shapeshifted into whoever she thought Greg would want. Greg being my 'step-dad'. He's 63. My Mum is 33. How is that even allowed.

We unloaded everything from the cars and waited on the trucks arriving with everything else. Cameron and I scuffed our shoes as we strolled through the huge house, taking in everything and familiarising ourselves with our new home.

"I'm so glad I'm not at school anymore because being in a class with snobby assholes like these people would be shit." Cameron said, crossing his arms as he gestured to the family across the road.

I walked over to him and watched too. A family of 5 - two girls, one boy, Mum and a Dad - were dressed rather nicely in dresses and suits. They came out of their house and waltzed to their Tesla nonchalantly with their noses in the air. The eldest girl looked around my age. She would probably be in some of my classes.

"I'm not looking forward to Monday." I groaned.

We stood in comfortable silence, watching the Tesla inquisitively as it drove off with the family inside.

"Trucks arrived!" Mum called from the front door.

We both shared our sibling look with one another then walked back out with reluctance. Mum was standing in the middle of the driveway with her hands on her hips, watching as Greg approached the van and signed some forms off. Cameron and I walked down and stood either side of her. She grinned and wrapped her arms around us, rubbing both our backs simultaneously.

"I've got a good feeling about this, guys." She took a deep breath.

"At least someone does." I remarked.

She ignored the comment and we watched Greg do practically nothing. I mean he was basically an ancient artefact.

"I've heard your new school is wonderful. The pass grade levels are insanely good and there's a lot of people there to befriend." Mum spoke positively.

"My last 6 schools also had a lot of people to befriend but of course, I always lose them because we move so bloody much." I clenched my jaw.

"Well...this time it's different."

I scoffed, "You always say that."

"I swear this time!"

"And that!"

"y/n I don't know what you want me to do. Greg is a great guy who is supporting us fully! I mean, look at this place! Surely you can't be mad we're living here." Mum shook her head, removing her arm from my waist.

"I'd rather live in a box with just you two than live in a huge house with some random guy in a town I hate." I argued then stormed away dramatically up the driveway.

I got into the house and slammed the door, grabbing the banister and stomping up the flight of stairs. There was one flight then a landing then another flight. This house was too bloody big.

I finally found what was meant to be my new room and slammed that door shut. Just for good measure. I huffed and sighed as I leaned my back against the white, wooden door.

The room was stark white and empty, only a bay window to give some character. I might hate Greg and my mother and this whole situation but I loved this bay window. I snaked in between the boxes and suitcases and sat on the wooden ledge. I kicked my shoes off before sitting my feet up and watching outside. My room faced the front of the house so I could see the movers offloading furniture and boxes off while Greg stood helplessly.

I groaned and leaned my head back, closing my eyes, just wanting to crawl into a shell and hide.

A slam of a car door forced my eyelids open and I jumped slightly.

"Where do you think you're going?!"

I heard a woman's voice from outside. I looked outside curiously, scanning the street with my eyes to find where the noise was coming from. It finally caught my eye and I had to sit up and switch sides of the window to look properly.

A red-headed woman and a curly headed boy were standing in the driveway.

Our next door neighbours apparently.

The boy was around my age, maybe a little older. He stumbled a little as he walked up the drive, his mother - I think - watching from behind her car door.

"I'm going to bed!" He shouted back.

"Not now you're not, you have to talk to me, Thomas!" She shouted, slamming her own car door.

Thomas.

He hung his head on his shoulders, "I need to sleep, mum."

"Well I just had to bail you out of jail for marijuana possession and use so you better talk to me."

Oof, I thought. He was a stoner. A criminal basically. But he was attractive from what you could see. Dark brown curly hair, tall enough, a sharp jawline, a good body from where I was sitting and a good style too - a hoodie with a denim jacket and jeans. But he was my neighbour. And a stoner.

"Mum can we just talk later?" He pleaded, running a hand through his hair.

"Tom we will talk about this right now." She said sternly.

He rolled his eyes and shook his head, turning his back to her and walking away. I watched him with a slight smile. He really was attractive.

"Thomas Holland you get back here right now!" His mother shouted.

"When I'm not on drugs, I'll talk." He stated.

His mother stuttered then just grunted in annoyance, allowing him to go inside.

I kept my eyes on him, my smile still on my face as he started to walk into his house. He suddenly turned his head with a confused expression then looked up. Straight at me through my window.

I froze in shock, eyes widening, mouth parting. He slowly smirked and nodded his head at me before going inside.

I sunk off the window ledge in humiliation, snaking to the floor and mumbling how stupid I was and how embarrassing that was.

"y/n! Come meet your neighbour!" Mum shouted up.

My ears perked up then I leaped up to look out the bay window. The boy next door's mum was standing outside, chatting to my mum.

I hardly learned anything talking to his mum. Her name was Nikki Holland, she had a husband named Dominic who was a comedian and a writer. She was a photographer. Along with Tom - the oldest - she had three other sons: twins named Harry and Sam and then Paddy who was a good bit younger. I can't remember the exact age. My mum had nosily asked her about Tom and that was the only part I listened to.

"He's 18,"

"Dropped out of school last year,"

"Says he wants to be an actor,"

"Oh today? He got in trouble from the police about...you know what, that isn't important."

"You look so young to be a mother to a teenager. How old are you?"

"And you're 18, too?" "Still in school?" "What do you want to do?" "Ah, smart girl."

The conversation was brief and slightly awkward. She was clearly stressed about Tom and his situation so I slid out of the engagement pretty fast and escaped up to my room.

During the entirety of the weird conversation, the movers had put my bed, mattress and desk into my room. It felt a lot more homier.

It was the next night and I had finished dinner and immediately gone upstairs. I was not participating in any sort of 'family time'. I sat down on my bed and scrolled through my phone aimlessly.

A thump outside drew my attention away and I looked to my right at the regular window which faced our neighbours house.

I sat up and squinted to see out into the dark. It was Tom. He was halfway out his window.

I didn't even realise our windows faced each other. And here he was, one leg out the window and his other following on. He had thrown a backpack down which caused the dull thump on the grass - which I only assume contains weed - and now he was escaping his house.

I got out of bed and walked to the glass, peeking out to see what he was doing.

He climbed impressively down the wall and jumped the last few metres, landing in a Spider-Man like pose. Admirable, I thought as he picked up his back pack and slid a skateboard out from a bush. He brushed it off then slotted it under his armpit.

He was sporting a black t-shirt with a dog-tag necklace and some distressed deep blue jeans with a denim jacket over top and a baseball cap placed on backwards that sat on top of his curly head of hair.

He looked around in case he was going to get caught then looked up. Directly at me. Again.

This time I didn't shy away. I just made a gesture and mouthed 'what the fuck?' then he laughed to himself and looked back up at me.

'Don't be so nosy, neighbour', he mouthed.

I squinted and shook my head in disapproval. He just smirked boyishly then walked to his driveway where he flipped his skateboard and skated off into the night.

I gulped and sat back on my bed, feeling my heart rate slow back down.

But curiosity filled my brain.

Where was he going?

Just as Sunday night came around, I had finished decorating my room. My pictures and paintings hung on the wall, along with some mirrors to fill the blank space of the white walls. My bed was cosy and was filled with throw blankets, fluffy sheets and way too many pillows. My desk was organised and my laptop sat atop the white surface, making it look a lot more professional than I had anticipated.

I had turned my bay window into a reading nook. A few blankets lay on the ledge and a couple pillows too, along with my current read.

I had seen Tom sneak out a few nights ago but I tried to stay away from the regular window, only ever sitting on the bay one because I couldn't see Toms room from there.

However, it didn't shield me from him completely.

I would see him outside in their front garden playing games with his brothers and sometimes I'd watch them from just over the top of my book. The way he played with their dog was cute. I had gathered her name was Tessa and I knew she was a staffy because we used to have one. He'd throw balls or sticks for her and sometimes she'd clamber on top of him with excitement. He'd dodge her licks but still clap her because she was excited after all.

Every once in a while he'd catch me looking down at him or I'd catch him looking up at me. Whenever it happened, it seemed as if everyone and everything disappeared. Like it was just us. Tunnel view. But then one of us would look away or stick the middle finger up or mouth 'fuck off'. Our unusual and silent rivalry was the closest thing to a friend I'd had in years.

But now, Mum, Greg and Cameron were going out to a nice dinner to celebrate the first week of living here. I thought it was an incredibly stupid idea so I decided to stay home alone and eat pizza.

They all left and Cameron immediately texted me.

Cammando: I hate you for leaving me

y/n: your fault not mine :)

I didn't really know what to do. I walked around the house and asked Alexa to play some songs but I couldn't be bothered dancing. I wasn't really in a dancing mood.

I just gave up and went back upstairs into my room. My windows were still open so before I got changed I went to close them and put down the blinds. I closed the bay window and then I went to the next one.

I looked straight ahead into Toms room and my jaw dropped.

He was hopping and hyping himself up in front of a punch bag...shirtless with gloves on. I watched as he punched the bag skilfully, moving his feet as if it was a choreographed routine. His damp curly hair hung onto his forehead and I could see glimpses of airpods in his ears. His back muscles tightened and flexed as he threw punches.

He moved around the bag and now I could see the front of him. He had a very visible six pack. I definitely didn't expect that from the stoner boy next door. If I thought he was attractive before...now I don't even know what I would call him.

Otherworldly, perhaps?

He suddenly looked up and I gasped, turning and slamming my back against the wall next to the window, wincing at the pain. Hopefully he didn't see me...

It was creepy to be staring at him. I shouldn't have done it.

I peeked back and he was back to beating the poor punch bag.

God, he was so hot.

I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks and ears, burning with lust. I gulped and looked away, closing the blind to stop myself from looking anymore.

I got changed into shorts and a burgundy Cambridge University jumper that used to belong to my Dad. He gave it to me the first time he properly left for a while and I still have it even though I see him more often.

I hopped downstairs and played some music while I sorted the pizza and chips out to eat.

I sat and ate while listening to music. Once I was finished, I cleaned everything up then went back upstairs into my room, shutting the door behind me and jumping onto my bed.

I scrolled through tiktok aimlessly, just filling the time before it was an acceptable hour to go to bed as a teenager.

I switched apps to Instagram when I lay on my side, my back facing my windows. I scrolled through for a while but a certain picture caught my eye.

I had to blink a few times to really look.

It was my so called 'best friend' who I hadn't talked to since I moved twice after befriending her and my ex-boyfriend. My ex. My only boyfriend I've ever had. My first kiss, my first date...my first time. My only time. We only had sex twice. Three if you count foreplay but I faked it. Actually I faked it all of the times. He was never good at it and I had no idea how to go about telling him because to be honest, I had no idea what to do either.

But my ex-best friend and my ex-boyfriend? She didn't even tell me. She didn't even think to ask me.

They were dressed nicely and holding each other's waists. It looked a little awkward but most of those pictures are because they are being taken by parents.

I looked through the comments.

OMG! Hot couple alert! You two are the cutest just marry already yall are too happy it's been the best year of my life baby

"WHAT?!" I exclaimed, sitting up sharply.

They had been together for a YEAR.

"Ugh!" I groaned and threw my phone across my room, hearing it basically break against the wooden floor.

"Rough night?" A voice spoke from my window.

I screamed, jumping with fear and successfully landing my ass on the floor.

I panicked and grabbed the first thing I could use as a weapon. A glass of water. It would have to do.

I quickly flung the water at the intruder, "WHAT THE FUCK, GET OUT!" I screamed, my eyes closed tightly in fear.

I heard the water splash over them but they still came in. I just threw the glass at them. It thumped against them dully and then crashed onto the floor.

"Ouch."

I slowly opened one eye and looked up at the figure who had just entered my room.

It was Tom.

He was in a grey t-shirt and black basketball shorts with a baseball cap placed on backwards, a backpack thrown over his shoulder.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING CLIMBING INTO MY ROOM?!" I shouted, standing up.

He was taller than me by a few inches but we were basically at eye level.

"I was clearly looking for some company but you then threw water over me and then a literal glass." He spoke calmly, wiping a hand over his wet face.

"How the hell are you being so calm about this?! You just intruded into my home!" I exclaimed.

"Well, darling, I have a thing called weed. It's great for calming you down. You clearly need some." He slung his bag around and went to open it.

"W-what? No, I'm not smoking weed!"

He sighed and slung his bag back, "Well, why are you being so uptight about this I just wanted to say hello." He smiled boyishly.

I licked my teeth in annoyance. He was so fucking attractive but he was so fucking annoying and I didn't even know him.

"You need to get out. I didn't invite you in here so you are not welcome." I stated, crossing my arms.

"Okay, yes. But also- my mother nearly just caught me sneaking out so it's a cover if she comes round here."

"Why would she come here?" I asked.

"Because she's a mad woman who hates me having a life apparently."

"You're an 18 year old who sneaks out of the house to smoke weed. I wouldn't call that a life." I remarked.

He smirked, "You know what, I like you."

He sat his bag down then started to walk slowly around my room, inspecting my pictures and decorations intricately.

I stuttered, not knowing how to react to this whole situation.

"I'm sorry, what the hell are you doing?" I asked, brows furrowed.

"You're quite an interesting person, I must say."

I sighed and shook my head at the ceiling.

"Ah, this makes sense." He picked up one of my camera's.

I scoffed, "What's that supposed to mean?"

He sat it down and picked up the next one, shrugging with a smug smirk.

"You like looking at things."

I gulped, red rushing to my cheeks.

"Clearly very beautiful things." He said, referring to my pictures on the walls.

"I'm just honoured I'm one of them."

I rolled my eyes and scoffed, "You wish you were."

"Oh but I am, aren't I?" He challenged, sitting my camera down.

I licked my back teeth and watched with heavy breath as he paced towards me slowly.

"I've never taken a picture of you before." I said matter-of-factly.

"You might not have but you definitely love a good stare, don't you?" He asked, his left eyebrow quirked cockily.

I noticed the unusualness of it and then looked into his dark, dilated eyes.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I said quietly.

He laughed lowly, "So you weren't staring at me earlier when I was working out?"

I stuttered as we came face to face.

"You're stubborn but I feel like I know you," He placed his fingers under my chin, tracing up my jaw and to my ear where he tucked some of my hair behind.

"Because I've been looking at you, too." He whispered.

I practically melted and a whimper left my mouth, eyes rolling back.

He chuckled, "Already needy for me I see."

I looked up at him as his thumb swiped over my lips.

This whole situation was insane. I didn't even know how we got here. I didn't know how to feel, either. I had never been turned on like this before.

He slowly pushed his thumb into my mouth and I moaned around it, tasting his skin.

"Good girl." He praised, taking his thumb out and replacing it with his tongue.

I moaned again, feeling his lips on mine. His hands gripped my waist and I tangled my fingers into his hair.

He tasted of weed but I didn't mind it at all. He pushed me backwards until I hit the wall next to my bed. He gripped my hips tightly and I kept my hands in his hair. He must have gone for a shower since his workout because he smelled fresh and clean and his hair was damp.

I couldn't believe I was doing this. I was kissing a stranger. Who climbed into my room.

"Wait-" He pulled away briefly.

"Is your family home?" He asked.

"No, they're out all night." I answered breathlessly.

He smirked, "Good."

He suddenly lifted me up and I squealed, automatically wrapping my legs around his taut torso.

His tongue slipped between my lips again and I welcomed it. He lay me down on my bed and started to kiss down to my jaw and my neck.

I gasped and tugged his hair when he started kissing a certain spot on my skin. He got the message that I liked it and started licking and sucking on it. I arched my back slightly, moaning as he worked his tongue and lips on my skin.

He left the spot on my neck but kissed over my skin as he started to lift my jumper up. Panic and nerves suddenly settled in and I grabbed his hands, stopping his movements.

"You alright?" He asked breathlessly.

I swallowed, "I uh...I've never-"

His eyes widened, "You're a virgin?"

"No, no. I've had sex it just...it just wasn't that great." I bit my lip nervously.

He encased my lips in his and I relaxed to his touch.

"Do you want to?" He asked against my lips.

"Yes, fuck yes." I practically moaned into his mouth.

"I just need you to guide me through it." I said in between kisses.

He pulled away, "I can do that." He smiled.

He started to lift my jumper off and this time I let him. I sat up and he removed it, throwing it off the bed. He admired the pink bralette I was wearing and immediately pressed his lips and tongue to the valley of my breasts. He nipped and sucked on my skin and I moaned as he palmed one of my boobs while leaving marks on the other.

He came back up and kissed me again but flipped us over so I was now on top. He sat up and shuffled back against my headboard and pulled me onto his lap.

He brushed my hair off my shoulders and cupped my chin, taking me in.

"D'you wanna try riding my thigh?" He asked lowly.

I gulped, "S-sure."

He smirked and I straddled his left thigh, holding his shoulders.

"Just rock your hips back and forwa-"

"Fuck," I moaned, the rubbing of the different materials causing my core to clench.

"Does that feel good?" He asked, his breath fanning over my face.

His hands rested on my hips and he helped my movements.

"Feels so good." I moaned.

"Yeah? You like riding my thigh?" He prompted, his hands making me speed up.

I fisted the material of his shirt in my hands as my mouth fell agape with pleasure.

"Riding my thigh like such a good girl." He praised.

"Fuck!" I hung my head back, his words going straight to my core.

He chuckled cockily, "D'you like when I call you that? Huh?"

I nodded, too flustered with these new senses of pleasure to speak.

His hand travelled up into my hair and tugged on it by my roots. A louder moan than I would have liked escaped my lips.

"I asked you a question, answer me." He said sternly.

"Fuck! Yes, I love it when you call me that." I answered pathetically.

"Good girl." He praised, letting go of my hair and rocking my hips on him.

I felt an immense amount of pleasure build up and it felt as if something was going to snap in me.

"Oh shit, I- fuck!" I furrowed my brows in concentration and confusion.

"R'you gonna cum, darling?" He asked, almost shocked.

"I don't- fuck - know!" I moaned, feeling the knot inside my stomach about to snap.

But before that could even happen I was being flipped back onto my back and Tom was ripping off my shorts and panties, diving in between my legs with lust.

His hands held my thighs and brought me closer to him. His lips attached to my clit and sucked, giving me a whole new feeling.

"Oh, fuck! Yes! Yes!" I moaned shamelessly, tugging his hair and fisting the bedsheets.

"Go on, darling. Cum in my mouth for me. Taste so good. Please, love."

The mixture between his words and his nicknames for me and the fact his mouth was working wonders on my core completely sent me over the edge: an experience I had never had before.

"Holy shit! Tom! Yes!" I subconsciously tightened my thighs around his head and my hands practically pushed him completely onto me.

He continued riding me through my high until I unclenched my thigh and he pulled away slowly.

I lay breathless and in a state of shock and euphoria at the same time.

"You okay?" He asked soothingly, rubbing his hand over my bare thigh as he came up to kiss me.

"Yeah I've...I've never-"

"You've never came before?" Tom asked, baffled by me.

"Nope..."

He kept his eyes on me but slipped a hand down to my core again. I bucked my hips against his hand with a gasp as he moved his fingers in circles over my core.

"You've never even touched yourself?" He asked lowly.

I bit my lip and shook my head.

"You're so wet for me, darling, fuck." He cursed.

He suddenly dipped a finger into my core and I moaned. He curled it up and I gripped his arm tightly.

"What d'you want?" He asked.

"I want you, Tom, please." I bit my lip.

He smiled and sat back, his hand coming away from my clit, leaving me feeling empty. He shed his shirt and I finally got to look at his chiselled torso up close. He then slid his shorts and boxers off and my jaw dropped at the sight of him.

He was semi-hard but he was already bigger than my ex. A lot bigger.

He pumped his member in his hand, "You sure about this?"

I stuttered, completely distracted by his actions than his words.

"What? You like the look of it? Hmm? Wanna suck me off?" He asked, his hand cupping my chin and sliding his thumb into my mouth again.

I moaned at his words and nodded.

"You want to suck me off, darling? You sure?" He asked, removing his thumb.

"Yes, fuck Tom, I wanna suck you off." I moaned.

"Good girl." He praised.

We switched positions so he was sitting against the headboard and now I was in between his legs.

"I don't know how to..." I said shakily.

"You're okay," He gathered my hair up in his hands.

"Do whatever feels natural and I'll tell you if it's good, yeah?"

I nodded and gulped, moving my mouth closer to his member. I pumped him in my hand a few times and I could almost feel him harden right there. I had done this part before, at least.

I lowered my mouth onto him, swirling my tongue around his lip. He hissed slightly and gripped my hair tighter. I slowly let my mouth down on him and came back up.

"That's it, good girl." He praised.

I moaned and continued bobbing my head slowly on him, finding a rhythm. I held his thigh for support as I got faster, easing into it.

"Fuck, darling, feels so good." He groaned.

The taste of him in my mouth was amazing, pre cum already escaping onto my tongue.

I slackened my jaw and took as much of him as I could then pumped the rest in my hand.

"Holy shit! Fuck!" He held my head there and thrusted up.

His member hit the back of my throat but I didn't mind it at all. He made sure I was okay then did it again. And again. And again. Until he was continuously throat fucking me. I enjoyed it, surprisingly. The obscene sounds my mouth was making was not only making Tom more aroused, but also me.

I felt some drool drip down from my mouth onto my chin and even onto his lower stomach but I didn't care.

"Fuck, love those pretty little sounds coming from your throat, baby." He groaned.

I moaned, my eyes rolling to the back of my head.

"Such a good girl."

But then he pulled me off of him. I looked at him in confusion but he flipped me onto my back sooner than I could say anything.

"Need to be in you before I cum, princess." He said, kissing me deeply, his tongue exploring my mouth.

"Ready?" He asked.

I felt his tip brush up and down my folds. I gripped his arms and nodded, closing my eyes to concentrate.

"Hey, look at me." He said.

I looked up into his gorgeous chocolate eyes.

"Breathe in," He instructed.

I did as he said.

"And out."

As I breathed out, he pushed into me slowly.

I moaned and arched my back at the feeling of him inside of me. His technique worked.

"You okay?" He asked caringly.

I nodded, biting my lip.

"You can move."

He started thrusting slowly in and out of me, my arousal making it a lot easier for him to move.

"So fuckin' tight, darling." He cursed.

I wrapped my thighs around his waist and he bottomed me out.

"Yes!" I moaned, my back arching so our chests were touching.

"Does that feel good?" He asked.

I hummed, "Faster, please."

He smirked, "As you wish."

His thrusts got gradually faster and my mouth hung open in a silent moan. He brushed past my g-spot with every movement and I scraped his back with my finger nails.

"So fucking good," I gasped.

He sped his thrusts completely and his head fell into the crook of my neck, leaving sloppy kisses on my skin.

"So big! Yes!" I moaned pornographically as he perfectly met my g-spot.

He reached a hand down and started rubbing my clit in skilful circles. I screamed out in overwhelming pleasure as I felt the now familiar feeling come back in my stomach.

"So good for me, darling. Been such a good girl. You gonna cum?" Tom whispered his praises into my ear.

"So close! Oh my god!" I curled my toes and dug my fingernails into his back.

"Come on darling. Feel so good around my cock. Feel so fucking good. You're a fucking angel, y/n. Fuck." He moaned.

I rolled my eyes back at his words. God his words.

"I'm gonna cum!" I squealed, eyes squeezing shut.

"Look at me when you cum, love."

I could hardly hear his voice anymore as I felt my second high approaching.

"I said-"

I gasped as I felt his hand around my throat, pressing the sides of my neck, activating some unknown pleasure button.

"Look at me when you cum all over my fucking cock." He grunted, his dark, dilated eyes staring into mine.

I kept my eyes on him as my high began to wash over me. His thrusts kept the same pace but his fingers moved faster, spurring my orgasm along.

"Yes! Fuck, feels so- yes!" I moaned.

I was extremely loud, I'm surprised the police hadn't come knocking asking about it.

My high seemed to be everlasting. Tom began to pull out but I kept my legs wrapped around him.

"Want you to cum in me, Tom. Please." I begged.

"You sure?" He asked, holding his orgasm back.

"Yes! Please! Need your cum in me." I moaned seductively against his lips.

"Fuck- so good for me- yes!"

I felt as he stilled in me, and as his cum painted my walls. His face contorted in levels of pleasure as he finished and I was finally coming down from my own high.

He pulled out after a second and collapsed next to me.

We both lay together, not saying a word, just listening to each other's breathing calm.

After a minute or two, he turned to face me.

"That- was so fucking good." He laughed.

"It was." I smiled back.

He reached a hand over to my face and brushed my hair behind my ear. I softened into his touch and hummed.

But that bliss was broken quickly.

"Hello?! We're home!"

I gasped, shooting up on my bed.

"Is that your mum?!" Tom whisper shouted.

"Yes! You need to go like now!" I whispered back.

He scurried off the bed and into his boxers and clothes, shakily putting on his shirt and attempting to put his shoes on quickly but leaving them untied.

I grabbed his backpack and handed it to him.

"Thank you," He smiled, taking it from me and heading for the window again.

He swung a leg out but then hesitated.

"Oh and uh-"

He held his hand out.

"I'm Tom, by the way." He grinned.

I smiled, shaking his hand.

"I'm y/n. Nice to meet you, neighbour."

"Nice to meet you, too." He winked, before climbing out the window, down the wall and back into his own house.

Nice to meet you indeed.

A/N: this is written for my amazing friend Caitlin and it's her birthday today! and she gave me all the details for this piece so i hope you guys enjoyed!

#tom holland #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland one shot #tom holland au #tom holland smuts #Smut #tom holland smut #stoner au #innocent au #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland fluff #fluff #ginny and marcus #oneshot

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