#the bias comes from the fact i think Tony is just right
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Rewatched Captain America: Civil War and... boy it hurts to see them fight and misunderstand and get angry at each other. I’m impressed by how long Tony managed to be patient with Cap, ngl. The amount of times he explained why this was important, why it would be a bad idea to fight it. The fact that he cared enough for Bucky to not want him to end up in prison. The fact that in Siberia, when Tony starts the fight he attacks Steve first and not Bucky, because his anger is about his friend keeping secrets from him.
The fact that Wanda was on “house arrest” in a huge compound with everything she could possibly need, including the company of her best friend/boyfriend, and Steve still called it ‘internment’. Buddy what do you think the Raft is? And whose fault is it that she ended up there to begin with?
Yes I’m very biased in this one but maybe just maybe this could have gone better if Steve just listened and considered the consequences of his actions on everyone before he did them.
#I’m very biased in favour of team Iron Man ngl#the bias comes from the fact i think Tony is just right#and also he’s my favourite character#but i like to think i can disagree with my favourite characters when i think they’re wrong#this is rambly as hell I’m not gonna tag it anything specific#might even delete it later bc this is just thoughts lmao
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Chuggington Headcanon: Wilson The Artist - WE WERE ROBBED \😫/
So if you know the CGI TV series Chuggington, you know its three main protaginists, Brewster, Koko, and Wilson, who is ultimately the main character overall, and TOTALLY THE BEST AND MOST RELATABLE talking train with face to grace the face of the earth and I'M TOTALLY NOT SAYING THAT OUT OF BIAS I'm NOT obsessed I'M PERFECTLY NORMAL I totally didn't kidnap him from his roundhouse to adopt him as my son I don't know WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT CRAZY A-
...Anyways, yes, Wilson is in fact the overall main character of Chuggington. He is mostly known for showing severe signs of ADHD, including having a short attention span and getting easily distracted, particularly in the first three seasons, and then in season 4, when our beloved trio move up to advanced training, Wilson becomes promoted as an apprentice for Chug Patrol Rescue Squad, due to various past occasions of him rescuing his friends from certain disaster.
Wilson has always been my favorite characater because he has the most relatable character of the main three, his fun personality is always so well-written, coupled with the voice acting from Morgan Overton and Tony Terraciano in the UK and US dubs respectively, and while his dodgy attention span, cheekiness and foolishness can get him into trouble, he always comes through to put things right and has creative and ingeniously unique ideas to solve problems. But you know what people DON'T talk about? >:( The fact that Wilson is CANONICALLY an ARTIST. 😎👌🎨
Let's quickly go over three examples:
Exhibit 1: Wilson and the Paint Wagon (Season 1 Episode 41)
So naturally, we must first go over the one that started it all: In "Wilson and the Paint Wagon", our trio learn how to use said wagons. Wilson struggles at first like the ADHD boi he is, but with Old Puffer Pete's help, he quickly learns how to control his paint wagon. 🎨
Right afterwards, see Wilson paint a yellow butterfly on his roundhouse door with some basic 2D detail. 🦋
And at the end of the episode, Wilson's newfound talent comes full circle when he demonstrates his skill to his friends as paints a picture of the main trio with Dunbar on the wall in the Training Yard, and coming from someone who's been drawing since three, I think it's safe to say he's got quite the unique artstyle for a beginner. 😎👍
Exhibit 2: Trainer Wilson (Badge Quest Season 2 Episode 13)
In the 13th and final second series episode of the Badge Quest short series, Wilson is to teach Hoot and Toot how to use the paint wagon, where he graces us once again with his painting skills with a picture of Hoot and Toot. 😌
Not too much difference in the artstyle compared to last time, but still a vitally noteworthy mention nonetheless.
Exhibit 3: Chug-O-Flage (Season 3 Episode 4)
And last, but definitely not least, "Chug-O-Flage" from season 3.
After unsuccessfully trying to make a camouflage net for safari training with Mtambo, Wilson decides to instead camouflage himself by getting painted as a parrot (Big mistake, it almost got him killed lol 🦏) but I'm sorry, the fact he got himself painted as A PARROT?🦜 HE CAME UP WITH THAT PAINT JOB, He TOTALLY DESIGNED THAT and somehow programmed it into the spray shed computer or something- THERE IS NO OTHER WAY- I SWEAR TO GOD, he HAD to- You can't tell m- there's NO WAY-
Your honor, my boi is an artist, I rest my case. 😌
This is why Wilson is best chugger. He's not only my inner child, (yours too, don't lie 😈) he's an artist. CANONICALLY an artist. He has ALWAYS had talent, Why wasn't there MORE of this, LUDORUM YOU ROBBED US ALL-
So finally here's where my headcanon comes into play:
Whenever Wilson makes the time for it, he likes to make paintings with the paint wagon just for the fun of it, usually of his favorite things like butterflies, ice cream or even his friends.
'Course, he already knows he can't just do it anywhere without permission, cuz dat's graffiti which is illegal, he usually uses whatever flat junk or scrap he can get hold of such as old metal sheets or wooden boards, even unused hopper cars rusting away in sidings that haven't met the cutter's torch get a touch up.
Sometimes, he does have actual canvases for painting (Lori gives them to him 😊) and he even puts them up in the wall in his roundhouse. Whatever he can't put in there is safely put in a storage unit located behind the Loading Yard.
It's safe to say his artstyle has improved quite a lot since what we've seen on-screen. 😉😎👌🎨
#Chuggington#Wilson#Chuggington headcanon#character headcanon#headcanon#Wilson is CANONICALLY an artist#canon artist#canon#chuggington wilson#wilson is best boi#stanwilson#wilson my child#my boi <3#wilson is my son#stan wilson#stanchuggington#stan chuggington#Chuggington Classic Series#Chuggington Season 1#Chuggington Season 3#Chuggington Badge Quest#Chuggington Badge Quest Season 2#Wilson and the Paint Wagon#Trainer Wilson#Chug-O-Flage
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Even I, when I read the text of his statements, find myself normalizing him. I read or listen and look for a drop of normalcy, or for how his followers would hear him. I subconsciously do the work he wouldn’t do and look for meaning or critical thinking amidst all the gibberish, and then dismiss the gibberish. But right there on the page, right there on the screen where he stands, his words are often nonsense, and offensive, frightening nonsense.
The major reason he’s still in this race, and not being laughed off the stage, is because so many of those who support him are locked behind a wall of information or bias and fictionalize him, and those who report on him are either afraid of him, told to normalize him by corporate higher-ups, or are inured to his weirdness and self-absorption. Many report on the drip of normalcy and neglect the flood of incoherent, belligerent, and offensive inanity. We must not allow ourselves to get so used to him to the point that he uses us.
The recent debate provided a good example of his belligerent inanity. I almost felt sorry for him a couple of times because he was so out of his depth, so lost and out of control. He had no facts to show he cared about issues and people, and often pushed beyond the debate agreements of 2 minute comments to aggressively ramble on with conspiratorial lies.
And the simplistic, malignant nature of these lies almost surprised me. I didn’t expect him to so blatantly repeat on national tv the weird crazies he repeats on smaller stages. For example, his old debunked refrain about millions coming across the border to steal and rape, even repeating racist disinformation about Haitians stealing pets to eat them. He ignored the fact that most Haitians in the city were here legally, and immigrants in general are less likely to commit crimes than other U. S. residents, certainly less likely than DT himself.
“In Springfield, they’re eating the dogs, the people that came in, they’re eating the cats,” said Trump. The police and other city officials have repeatedly said there were no such reports, but DT claimed it was true because he saw it somewhere on tv.
Of course, when asked directly at the debate if he wanted the Ukrainians to win the war to defeat Russian invaders, or if he would veto a national abortion ban, he showed his true values and that, maybe his ramblings serve a purpose all his own, and refused to answer the actual question asked.
Recently, at a Fox “News” town hall, he was asked about the mass shooting at Apalachee High School in Georgia that led to four deaths and multiple injuries. DT avoided the question to talk about the support he received from Hungarian autocrat Viktor Orbán, the same autocrat he mentioned at the debate as a foreign ruler who respects him.
“’It’s a sick and angry world for a lot of reasons…’ Trump said. ‘And we’re going to make it better, you know, Viktor Orban made a statement, he said, ‘bring Trump back and we won’t have any problems.’ He was very strong about that.’” Never a comment about gun safety, or a sliver of compassion for the victims and their families.
Or to a Mom’s for Liberty event he said, “The transgender thing is incredible. Think of it. Your kid goes to school and comes home a few days later with an operation. The school decides what’s going to happen with your child.” Untrue, yes. Insane? Possibly.
In a recent speech to the Economic Club of New York, he rambled on again about Kamala Harris’ border policy: “She wants to defund the police, have Tony Logan votes, ban trafficking in Pennsylvania and everywhere else, take away your private health insurance, and perhaps most pertinent to the very brilliant people in this room, raise your business and corporate taxes, and unbelievably, she’ll see a text on unauthorized trafficking in those people’s living rooms at ease…”
Then: “[She] Has to be defeated. Cannot have her be the President of the United States. Under Kamala, the United States is becoming a third-world banana republic. She and her party are censoring speech, weaponizing the justice system, and trying to throw their political opponents, me, in jail.
This hasn’t happened. I didn’t do that to Crooked Hillary. I said, that would be a terrible thing, wouldn’t it? Putting the wife of the President of the United States in jail…” Of course, during the 2016 campaign he and his supporters repeatedly greeted mentions of Hillary Clinton with shouts of “lock her up.” And recently, he repeatedly talked about his own plans to weaponize the DOJ.
When asked, “’If you win in November, can you commit to prioritizing legislation to make childcare affordable, and if so, what specific piece of legislation will you advance?” In DT’s reply, he admitted childcare was an important issue but failed to mention a single specific solution. Instead, he spent his time rambling incoherently on his idea of increasing tariffs on imports. He said:
“But I think when you talk about the kind of numbers that I’m talking about, that—because look, child care is child care. It’s, couldn’t—you know, there’s something … You have to have it. In this country, you have to have it.
But when you talk about those numbers compared to the kind of numbers that I’m talking about by taxing foreign nations at levels that they’re not used to, but they’ll get used to it very quickly. And it’s not going to stop them from doing business with us, but they’ll have a very substantial tax when they send product into our country.’” And on and on.
And at a rally in Las Vegas, in June, reported on by Eugene Robinson of The Washington Post, DT was trying to talk about the transition to electric vehicles, but instead veered off to speak about sharks:
“By the way, a lot of shark attacks lately, do you notice that? Lot of sharks. I watched some guys justifying it today: ‘Well they weren’t really that angry, they bit off the young lady’s leg because of the fact that they were not hungry, but they misunderstood who she was.’ These people are crazy. He said, ‘There’s no problem with sharks, they just didn’t really understand a young woman swimming.’ No, really got decimated, and other people, too, a lot of shark attacks….”
In the Washington Post article, the author also focused on the ridiculous normalizing of DT in much of the corporate media. “We in the media have failed by becoming inured to Trump’s verbal incontinence — not just the rapid-fire lies and revenge-seeking threats, but also the frightening glimpses into a mind that is, evidently, unwell…. The tendency with Trump, at 77, is to say he’s ‘just being Trump.’ But he’s like this all the time….” Hopefully, the debate has clearly exposed to the nation that he can’t or shouldn’t be normalized and is unfit to hold political office.
Add this to his offensive comments about soldiers, especially those wounded and killed during their service, or sexist, misogynist, and often cruel comments about women and one wonders how he could still be in this race, or how could anyone feel safe with the idea of him wielding power. There’s a reason why so many members of his former cabinet and administration are warning us about him. And as journalist Greg Sargent recently wrote in The New Republic, it’s time for “the media” to make DT’s incoherence the top story of the week, year, decade.
Time for us all, when we can listen to him, to recognize what’s there and not there, and get out the vote for Harris-Walz.
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I think this is an emotional time. We miss three of the members, and four more will be leaving soon. Even though we knew it was coming, it’s sad to think that very soon, all seven members will be gone and we’ll miss them all terribly.
This is also a quiet phase for yoonmin. Again, even though we knew it was coming, it doesn’t make it easier.
It’s just human nature that when things are quiet, we can fall victim to recency bias, meaning that we place more importance on recent events and tend to think less about the significance of previous events.
In the spirit of avoiding recency bias, I’d just like to offer a list. I find lists and facts really reassuring. Maybe you do too.
From Oct 2022-August 2023, Yoongi and Jimin worked together quite a bit!
💛 Tourism ads
💛 Art for Indigo with Joon
💛 Ddeun Ddeun
💛 Like Crazy and Haegeum dance challenges
💛 Two episodes of Suchwita
💛 Suga | Agust D “road to army” video
💛 Tony Montana
That’s a pretty nice list! We also know that they hung out in their free time:
💙 Sushi dinner
💙 Working out together
💙 Discussing Face Off and human relationships
💙 Getting a meal together after Ddeun Ddeun filming
💙 Jimin attending two D-Day concerts other than the one where he performed TM and LC.
💙 Drinks the day after the second Seoul concert
💙 Drinks prior to Yoongi’s enlistment
💙 Celebrating Jimin’s birthday
💙 Jimin watching Yoongi’s birthday live from home, taking a video of himself watching, and posting it on Weverse
💙 Yoongi attending Jimin’s music show recording
💙 Yoongi peeking in on Jimin’s dance practices at Hybe (this came up during Suchwita with Taeyang)
💙 Jimin telling Jimmy Fallon the two members he sees most often are Hobi and Yoongi
💙 Yoongi saying during a d-day event that the member he spoke to most recently was Jimin
I’ll also add a third category, which seems to be a mixture of work and free-time:
💚 Jimin and Yoongi’s live in Newark.
💚 Yoongi joining Jimin’s video call.
So…that’s a pretty good list right? Let’s not forget these things moving forward. It will be ok.
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(2/2 - back to the bitchiness!)
Babe can cry all he wants about not feeling worthy of love, but he knew Way loved him (romantically or not), and it always looked like he had a good thing going with Alan too, and the team in general were pretty close - found family I thought?? He was by no means starved of affection until Charlie arrived on the scene. It might just be a personal thing, but I will, 9 times out of 10, always root for the shared history over the instalove, unless the latter is incredibly well-written and portrayed. And I'm sorry, but for me Charlie/Babe falls short on both counts. I genuinely don't like to criticise real ppl who've done nothing wrong, but I don't think I'm alone in feeling Charlie is a weak link in a fairly uniformly strong cast, and it becomes particularly glaring when playing next to actors like Pavel and Nut. Add to that the way they've styled him (with the stupid oversized glasses - as a glasses-wearer myself, this is a pet peeve!), and he looks to me like nothing more than a silly kid playing at being a grown-up (not sure what their ages are meant to be so maybe he is!). And then when it comes to being so amazing/special that he completely changes Babe's world...admittedly, I don't pay attention during his scenes so maybe I've missed something, but from what I can gather, he became obsessed with someone he'd never met, stalked him for a bit, deliberately infiltrated his personal and professional life, approached him with the intent of making him fall in love with him, and repeatedly lied to him about devastating truths? But it's okay, romantic in fact, because it was all just in service of saving his life? (Thank you btw for your own service in previously pointing out this correlation tween him and Way!) From what I see, all he does is slavishly worship Babe and be really good in bed? Personally, I don't think that makes for a particularly healthy and sustainable relationship! (And to be fair, this is again probably a flaw in the writing: because Babe is the main character, the way his relationships are portrayed disproportionately champion him, not the other person - it's about ppl doing things in service of him, supporting him, loving him - we see much less of what he actually gives back, of him supporting them, of why these ppl want him in their lives (besides having Pavel's face), and that can make these relationships seem very one-sided. Undoubtedly my bias showing through yet again, but I think those montages of Way and Babe's friendship, however brief, did a really good job of allowing the viewer to easily picture how that relationship came to be and why it meant so much to both of them.)
Sorry if I’ve been harsh – it’s all still meant in the spirit of constructive criticism (with maybe the teeniest hint of pettiness)! It’s just that, while everyone else is crying over Babe/Charlie, I’m still here obsessing over the idea of a young Way experiencing the devastating realisation that he can never ever tell the person he's fallen utterly in love with the truth about himself, because the second Babe knows he will never trust him again, never TOUCH him again. And, in a way, that realisation cements Way’s fate, because even if he wanted to thwart Tony’s plan, how could he do so without first revealing it, and thus revealing himself?
And somehow even worse is the fact that, if you think about it (don’t - it hurts), even if he’d escaped from Tony eons ago, Way was always doomed by his own power to be alone, because, let’s face it, would you ever completely trust someone who can do what he can? Wouldn’t a tiny part of you always be wondering if that brush of the hand, that easy arm over the shoulder, that comforting hug, was entirely innocent? If your thoughts were always entirely your own? And that just breaks my heart more than anything else in this show!
mm you're right, but i don't think it was love he was missing but romantic love. babe had friends and a family all rolled into one and they all seemed to have a great relationship, but as he said himself, he didn't want or need (romantic) love. it was meeting charlie and spending time with him (and being able to do so because of charlie's lack of stinky alpha pheromones) that made him realise that was something he wanted. yes he fell in love pretty quickly, but i think it's believable, specially considering it's his first love. people have been talking about this extensively so i don't really have anything to add, but it's so important to me how smitten babe is with charlie; there's the whole baddie aesthetic vs softie personality, screw toxic masculinity, Boys Can Be Soft Actually… i have 0 objectivity, he's perfect to me. i love romance and i love my car racing babygirl.
i know people are interpreting this differently and maybe i'm just wrong, or this may be a translation issue/something that's clearer in thai, but imo when babe said the line about sometimes feeling like he wasn't worthy of love bc of what way told him he was referring specifically to that one time we saw way manipulate him, and that it wasn't something that happened regularly. sorry i know i keep saying this, but i genuinely believe the focus on the escalating levels of manipulation wasn't only so we'd notice but because we were supposed to notice way's desperation and how he went from doing it occasionally to "help" babe (that first time in ep 2) to… everything that came later. not to drag way but he wasn't doing shit for those 10 years other than buying babe time by waiting for him to magically love him back. how tf did he convince tony lmao maybe tony just wasn't in any rush to get babe back yet since he knew he could do it whenever he needed him.
oh no you are fully right, pooh isn't the strongest actor (i used to think lee/dean was the weakest out of the cast because of some awkward moments during the first eps but then the garage scene happened and i cannot say that anymore, he was fecking amazing) which isn't surprising since it's his first role, but i also think it adds a certain charm to the character; charlie recently graduated so i believe he's around 22 (i was told a while back he's 20 in the novel, if that's relevant? and alan tells babe that jeff (20) and charlie are the same age but unlike koreans who ime usually mean born in the same year when they say that, i've seen things like a 27 yo being happy he's working with "people his age" talking about people aged 23 to 25, so…) and he is trying to save babe from their evil adoptive father and all his power basically by himself, so "a silly kid playing at being a grown-up" is an accurate description imo lol he really is a brave, naive, optimistic kid, and that's what will make him succeed ultimately. i super believe in you charlie pit babe. also please do not come for charlie's styling, he's wearing my glasses lmao (they're normal sized?? or we have the same temple to cheekbones ratio, so yes, they just look like that) (also people please prioritise field of view over glasses size) (this was funny btw, don't think i was offended!)
waynnie, i am in my way feels 24/7. i cannot stop thinking about his isolation even when he had the team and his best friend by his side because as much as they felt like a family to him, his secret was always (and was always going to be) between them like a persistent ghost. i cannot stop thinking about his anxiety meds (afaik triazolam is used in my country to treat transitory insomnia, btw, but i'm not a doctor and we're going with the subs) and about how if he'd wanted to tell babe about tony earlier he would have had to tell him everything which would make him lose the only good things he has in his life, so no wonder he needs those meds. and not to sound like a broken record, but again, it's a fact that both charlie and way approached babe under false pretenses and both fell in love with him, but because way did so under tony's orders and not of his own volition this is somehow unforgivable…? intent is important and charlie was lying for a good reason, he wouldn't have been able to get close to babe by telling him the truth, but ultimately both of them lied and if we're judging only that fact they're either both wrong or both right, pick one.
i also keep thinking about the parallel of touch and having feelings about (possible) pete powers that the show will probably invalidate in a few hours. and because i love pain and suffering, i keep thinking how people's reaction to knowing someone can manipulate them just by touching them would be worse to their already horrible reaction to knowing someone can see their future by touching them, so yeah. we love it here in the pit babe of despair.
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You answered me so kindly that I take the liberty of bothering you again to ask for your opinion. I absolutely don't want to compare rwrb and m&g, they are two such different products, with diametrically opposed themes and messages that it is impossible to even have the thought, for example, of comparing the chemistry that Nicholas naturally had right from the start with Taylor and the one that he instead with tony a more mature man than him (and I won't name the other people he interacted with in the series because they are irrelevant). I see people really confused: in rwrb there is a love story, true, intense, painful but at the same time satisfying and all-encompassing, with an important message of acceptance, respect for sexuality and above all a happy ending, which for the queer community it never happens. Taylor and Nicholas were pure magic, something that you probably can't have with other actors except in a different way and this is demonstrated by the fact that even after months in which they found themselves shooting certain scenes again (and Nicholas had finished a project and was filming the series) the chemistry was not only intact but enhanced. in m&g he plays a boy who ends up using sex to gain power, dirtying his own morals and innocence, and with the character of tony he plays a story that is not love, but affection and possession. so it is clear that in this case we are not talking about chemistry, but about two actors who had to find a balance to credibly stage a story that was in many respects scandalous. so (and here I come to the question and sorry if I've gone on too long...) why do you think people feel the need to always compare everything? and I think it will probably happen with Anne too (with whom I'm sorry to say it, but I didn't see the spark either from the trailer or from other released scenes)... it's the people who aren't able to be objective in their judgments or maybe it's me who didn't focus well?
You're not missing anything! In fact, I really appreciate you being so thorough in your explanation of how the two are impossible to fairly compare.
You're absolutely correct, m&g and rwrb are too different to actually compare. Art and stories are hard to compare to begin with, but when it's in the same genre, let's say for M&G something like The Favourite (2018), a film that is also labelled as a period dark thriller about a monarch and the scheming between their favourites, that's a little more feasible to compare because there are common points in both executions of the genre and the story itself. (Note: The Favourite leans more into fiction while M&G leans more into history, granted both take artistic liberties)
RWRB is fictional, a modern fairy tale about young, kind, monogamous, and true love. There's no deception or competing for interests. It doesn't share anything with M&G other than depicting queer relationships in the British monarchy (and it's not even the same era, there's a 400-year difference) and Nicholas Galitzine.
From what I can think of, part of the reason the two are compared is truly a hateful attempt to put down RWRB and the people involved and deliberately claim it as inferior. Because of stereotypes, industry double standards and whatnot, it's easy to claim a rom-com as artistically inferior to a period drama, even though just as you mentioned, these are two inherently pieces of work that cannot be fairly compared. Using this bias, RWRB will always lose to M&G, even though that is objectively untrue. This is a deliberate attempt to devalue RWRB, which feeds into the disgusting and now proven by the man himself, untrue narrative that Nick is "above" RWRB. Please ignore those people.
The same will go with Anne. And since this time TIOY and RWRB belong to the same category, namely a modern rom-com with high-profile public figures involved, they will use something else to compare it. Don't get me wrong, Anne is lovely, but an excuse that will definitely be used will be Anne's level of status in the industry compared to Taylor's, when in actuality a person's stardom isn't inherently related to chemistry. (Chemistry is such a specific and special thing.) A lot of the time these comparisons are just a way to demean Taylor. (truthfully I'm on the same boat as you when it comes to their chemistry. I'll reserve judgment until the movie is out but definitely didn't hit me the same way Taylor and Nick did for me. Not even close.)
Hope this helps!
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[the chart wasn't agreeing with me, so list form it is!]
ABOUT YOU: HORROR MOVIES
---------------------------------------------- Favourite Film of All Time -> Candyman (1992)
how do I explain my love for this movie without going apeshit? is it my bias towards Tony Todd? the cultural significance? the MUSIC??
Best Script -> Ready or Not (2019)
I had trouble thinking about an answer for this one, but then I remembered just how many moments in this movie got me laughing, and it fit right into the slot.
Favourite Poster -> The Thing (1982) and The Descent (2005)
I AM A SUCKER FOR THE "BACKLIGHT HIGHLIGHTS A SHADOWY FIGURE IN THE FOREGROUND" POSTER FORMAT and the way they did it for The Descent with the ladies' bodies forming a skull is BALLER
"I'll Watch it Some Day" -> The Road (2009), Melancholia (2011) and Wolf Creek (2005)
Two of them are recommendations of depressing movies from the internet, both with apocalyptic theming, and then Wolf Creek is one I just haven't gotten to yet.
Big Personal Impact -> Silence of the Lambs (1991)
This was my first proper horror movie. I had watched it at a friend's house since she was obsessed with Hannibal Lecter, and honestly? she was so right.
Best 3+ Hour Film -> I haven't watched any :<
You Like, but Everyone Hates -> REC 3: Genesis (2012)
I had trouble with this one too, but then I remembered that the reviews section of IMDB existed, and just...god, I was so sad. I was so sad because I loved this movie despite breaking from the typical REC format. I'm very partial to Clara, idec
You Hate, but Everyone Likes -> IT (1 and 2)
I was just not as impressed with this duology as everyone else was! I'm also fragile to jumpscares and Pennywise is a bitch about it.
Underrated -> I...don't have an answer for this either-
Overrated -> Jaws (1975)
I am...not a creature feature person. I don't have much of an explanation for this one either,,
"Why do I like this?" -> The Jinrou Games series (Werewolf Game)
This is where my old "How to Beat" fixation comes in clutch. I actually went and watched those movies, and they're just,,, gah, killing games, my beloved. I'm a sucker for strategy and psychology being exploited in a horror game.
Great Soundtrack -> Candyman (1992)
Philip Glass supremacy. Helen's Theme has unintentionally become my own theme song.
That Cinematography!! -> Cabin in the Woods (2011)
I REFUSE TO IGNORE THE FACT THEY TRIED SO HARD TO DO EVERYTHING PRACTICALLY. Like, that's a batshit thing to try and do, and I admire it so much.
Bad Day Cure -> Freaky (2020), Mayhem (2017) and Ready or Not (2019)
Simple plots, fun casts, and I am a SUCKER for Samara Weaving.
Favourite Protagonist -> REC franchise, Aliens (1986) and Ready or Not (2019)
Angela, Ripley and Grace deserve to go out and get coffee together, I'm telling you. Out of the three, I'm incredibly biased towards Angela, but the other two are both also super good!
Honorable mentions are Mac (The Thing) and Erin (You're Next).
Favourite Trilogy/Franchise -> Child's Play, Saw and REC
Don't you make me choose between them, please, I'm begging you-
Biggest Letdown -> Child's Play 3 (1991) and Saw 3D (2010)
Child's Play 3 felt the most lifeless of the original trilogy, and Saw 3D pissed me off SO MUCH.
Biggest Surprise -> Bodies, Bodies, Bodies (2022)
Similar to how I felt about the reboot season of Total Drama, I was kinda worried about the portrayal of its characters. However, they were just the right level of obnoxiousness, and the dialogue was more fun than irritating.
"Not the best, but having fun!" -> Patient Seven (2016) and Funhouse (2019)
I felt robbed when I looked up the reviews for Patient Seven, I was super into that movie especially with the main psychiatrist character, he was HORRID. And Funhouse just felt like Big Brother but with Saw elements and that I fuck with a LOT.
Criminally Overlooked -> Revenge (2017)
Yes, I know the r*pe revenge sub-genre is super iffy, but if you're gonna watch any one movie under it, pick this one. Jennifer is a BEAST and it's stylized in a really cool way!
Depressing Movie -> Would You Rather (2012) and Train to Busan (2016)
I wanted to go with something other than the de-facto choice of The Mist (2007) or Requiem for a Dream (2000) since I haven't even seen the latter, and when I thought about it, I remembered just how HOLLOW I felt with the majority of Would You Rather, especially with the end. And in the case of Train to Busan, I am already partial to apocalypse movies, but there were a lot of emotional scenes in that movie that I feel inclined to consider it sad.
Favourite Active Director -> Jordan Peele
This is a kind of wild answer, considering I haven't mentioned any of his movies, but his directing style is super rad! I still need to watch Nope, but I enjoyed both Get Out and Us more than I probably should.
The secondary answer is James Wan and Tom Savini.
Favourite Animated Film -> Corpse Bride (2005) and 9 (2009)
I am SHOCKED that 9 isn't primarily a horror movie. Like, what the fuck, there's no fucking way it isn't primarily horror. That film is TERRIFYING, and it's literally apocalypse horror. Like, come on. Corpse Bride is also my Tim Burton movie of choice, yes, even over Coraline.
Not really my thing...BUT- -> Willy's Wonderland (2021), The Banana Splits Movie (2019) and FNAF (2023)
Mascot horror is not my sub-genre of choice, especially when in game form, it's more inclined to rely on jumpscares, but at the same time, there was a lot to enjoy about these movies, namely the atmospheres. Plus, I'm forever impressed by the actors and puppeteers behind the animatronics.
crucify me
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Bittersweet 🍋
Chapter 1
A/N: I’m glad to finally start sharing more of this au! This is the sequel to Sweet and Sour. This chapter is mostly introduction, so it’s mostly Peter and Tony figuring out some parts of parenthood. Following chapters will have more plot and longer scenes. This is just to show some snapshot scenes of things starting out. I hope y’all enjoy 💕
Warnings: omegaverse (omega!Peter, alpha!Tony), baby fic (and the things that go with it), brief strong language
Tagging: @preciouspeterbparker @jordanparker @awesomestarker @css1992 @muse-of-gods @buckettbarnes idk who else to tag, just remembering some people who liked the original lol let me know if you don’t want to be tagged!
***
It felt like life truly couldn’t get any better.
As Peter snuggled against Tony, their baby in his arms, he felt like he was completely surrounded by love. It was all that he’d wanted for so long.
Life was good. Great, even.
May had come and gone, ready to comfort Peter and see her grandson. Although she was adamant about the fact that she didn’t think she was old enough to have grandchildren.
It was all clearly in fun, though, because she didn’t stop smiling once while she was there. Maybe she wasn’t Tony’s biggest fan, but she knew that Peter loved him. And she could get over her own bias long enough to love on their pup.
She didn’t hang around too long, though. She could tell that the couple was tired and needed whatever quiet time they could get. She knew they’d need it. So she pressed a kiss to Peter’s forehead and whispered how proud she was of him before leaving.
The room was quiet once she left.
Tony had squeezed into the bed next to Peter and kept him close. Peter didn’t mind. He wanted his alpha right by his side no matter what. He didn’t want him to leave.
Benny stayed snuggled against Peter’s chest, eyes squeezed tightly shut. He was so tiny. So vulnerable in this big world.
Peter knew as soon as he saw him that he’d do everything he could to always keep him safe. He figured that was a typical feeling after birth, something to do with instincts. But he didn’t care about the biological part of it, he just wanted to keep his baby safe. He’d do anything for him.
The omega gazed at the pup, so filled with love. Their baby was finally here. And he was so happy. In that moment he was convinced that he’d never felt so happy in his entire life.
Then the tiredness hit him all at once. As it turned out, labor and giving birth was exhausting.
His high from seeing his baby was wearing off and he was overwhelmed by the need to take a nap. Tony seemed to sense this, watching him with a fond smile. “Lemme hold him, mama. You rest for a little bit.” He held his arms out.
He was happy to help Peter, plus he was eager to hold little Benny more. He understood that the pup needed the contact with his omega parent first. It was important to form the parental bond and all that, lots of scent contact was needed and such. Lots of technical stuff. He understood that, he did. He was just really impatient and wanted to hold their baby too. He needed to form that bond too.
He’d missed out on so much of the pregnancy firsts, he wouldn’t dare risk missing any firsts now.
Peter nodded sleepily, gently handing over Benny. “Wake…” he yawned. “Wake me up in…thirty minutes. He might need to…eat again.” Even through his exhausted state he was trying to make sure he did everything right for his baby. He wanted to get it all right.
“Okay, honey. I will,” Tony promised. “You sleep. You need it.”
The omega definitely needed it. Every time he blinked he could feel himself drifting off. So he snuggled into Tony’s side more, purring quietly. It only took seconds for him to be out completely.
Tony gazed at him, so in love. It didn’t matter that the omega was a mess, still sweaty from labor with hair plastered to the side of his head. He was still so gorgeous to Tony. He birthed their beautiful pup. Their little family was expanding.
And everything was good.
***
Day 3
Peter was happy that they didn’t have to stay in the hospital for long.
There were no complications with either him or Benny, which he was thrilled about. Although Benny was almost considered late preterm at thirty seven weeks, everything was still perfectly fine. The baby was healthy and everything seemed to be working properly. This allowed for Peter to relax (even just slightly) and made sure that they were discharged in only two days.
He was so ready to take their baby home.
He signed everything that he needed to sign, made sure that everything was in order while Tony went to pull the car up to the front.
Benny was happy in his little seat carrier, the model of a perfect baby as far as Peter was concerned. He wasn’t crying, his tummy was full, he was happy. He was a happy little baby.
Peter picked up the seat as carefully as possible, terrified of doing something wrong. The staff assured him that he was doing everything right, but he didn’t want to risk anything. He was scared, but he also knew that it was natural.
He carried Benny outside, glad that he was bundled up when he felt the sting of the February air. But he didn’t have to stand in the cold for long because he saw their car waiting for them.
Tony had already gotten out and opened the backseat, ready to get the baby into the carseat that they’d already installed a few days prior.
He was glad that Peter had thought to be so prepared. Omega instincts were good, he supposed. He wouldn’t have thought to do so many of the things that Peter had. Especially not as soon as he had, since little Benny decided to come a little early.
Peter carefully got the baby out of the carrier and handed him over to Tony. He set the seat into the floorboard of the car, checking to make sure the alpha could get Benny into the other one. He’d heard too many horror stories of overly complicated carseats not being done correctly and causing problems.
But Tony did perfectly and Benny seemed content.
Peter smiled, walking around to get into the passenger’s side. He buckled in and closed his eyes, hearing Tony get into the driver’s seat a minute later.
Benny’s reaction to being left alone was almost immediate.
The baby screamed at the top of his lungs, making the new parents wince and cover their ears.
They were surprised over and over again at just how loud such a tiny person could get.
“I’m sorry, Benny,” Peter said softly, quickly unbuckling again and climbing into the backseat.
Benny quieted once he saw his mama’s face, cries ceasing. He was completely calm again in an instant.
Peter let out a soft sigh. “I knew we should have gotten that mirror thing. Y'know, the thing so he could see us?” He smiled weakly. “Okay, I guess I’ll sit back here.” He buckled into the seat next to the carseat, stroking Benny’s cheek with one finger. “I’m sorry we left you alone.”
Tony glanced back at them, smiling a little. The sudden outburst was just the beginning of many, he was sure. Welcome to parenthood, it was loud. “Alright, ready to get home now?”
Peter nodded, rubbing his eyes. “I sure hope so.”
And so they went, the ride home quiet. The atmosphere was sleepy and quiet, but filled with so much promise. They couldn’t wait.
***
Day 6
The first few days at home had gone fairly smoothly. The new parents were missing sleep more than they’d anticipated, but they were getting what they could.
Benny was a good baby. As long as he wasn’t left alone he stayed happy. Calm.
Although there were challenges that came with a new baby that didn’t come from the baby at all.
Peter thought that he’d read all there was to read. He thought he was totally prepared for anything thrown at him.
Turns out that he wasn’t even prepared for what his own body would throw at him.
“Tony, it hurts,” Peter whimpered, tenderly holding his chest.
He’d only been home a few days. There were so many firsts to be had, he always forgot that there was still more to come.
He’d been so happy that Benny was easy to feed. He didn’t fight against latching, he didn’t refuse to eat, he was a very easy baby when it came to feeding. It was incredibly easy for Peter to forget that things wouldn’t necessarily stay that way.
But now his milk was actually coming in. And he knew that could change eating habits.
It could also change a lot of other things.
The alpha watched him with a soft expression, brows furrowed in concern. “I’m sorry, honey. But it’s- I think it’s a good thing. Right?” He grabbed his phone, ready to double check.
“I know it is, but I didn’t expect them to be so…sore.” The omega whined softly to himself, looking down at his chest. He’d gotten used to the small breasts that had come in, but he wasn’t prepared for the additional changes when his milk came in.
Swollen and sore and leaking and he didn’t know what to do about any of it.
“Does Benny need to feed?” Tony offered weakly. “Maybe that could…help some.”
“He just ate a little while ago.” Peter squeezed his eyes shut. ��And I can’t pump. Everything- everything I read keeps telling me that I need to wait a few weeks or I’ll fuck up my supply.”
Tony frowned. “Can you try to express the excess at all? Like- hold on, let me look it up.”
The omega opened his eyes, trying to gently relieve the pressure by massaging. It wasn’t working. And while he was absolutely sure that whatever Tony was searching would only pull up porn, he was willing to try whatever solution he could find.
Oh he wished that he’d prepared better for this part.
He’d get the hang of it eventually.
***
Week 2
Peter knew that it would take a while to get into a good routine. Benny was still adjusting to everything. The omega knew that things could take a while to get easier and on a schedule.
Even if he understood it, he still wished that his sleep schedule could recover already. He was dependent on sleeping whenever the baby did and surviving off of the little rest he got.
He was so tired all the time. He was sure that Tony was too, but at least the alpha didn’t have to go running at every cry.
Peter tried to tell himself that he wasn’t bitter about that.
It seemed like there was quite a bit of that recently.
As soon as he put Benny down for a nap and was sure that he was asleep he jumped into bed himself. It was something of a routine on its own at the moment. He didn’t want to waste a single second of potential sleep.
But he woke up from his nap and he knew that he’d slept too long. His body was sore from how he’d been laying and time didn’t feel real. If he’d checked the clock before he fell asleep then he’d have some idea of how long his nap had been but he hadn't thought to.
Had it been that dim in the room when he laid down?
A wave of anxiety shocked through him as he thought about Benny. Was the baby okay? It was so irresponsible of him to sleep for so long.
The pup was still in his bassinet. Had he been there the whole time? He wasn’t crying but he probably needed something. The omega felt awful.
“Tony?” Peter called, rubbing his eyes. The anxiety must have leached into his voice because the alpha came to peek his head into the room almost immediately.
“Hey, sleeping beauty. You’re awake.” Tony gave him a smile. “Feeling better?”
Peter ignored the question, sitting up more. “I didn’t- I shouldn’t have slept so long.”
The alpha watched him, coming to sit next to him on the bed. “He’s safe and okay,” he assured him. “He just got back to sleep. He got a little cranky, but I changed his diaper and he was fine. And I followed your exact instructions, don’t worry. He’s in the bassinet again now, see? He might need to eat, but for now he’s asleep.”
Peter listened to him and relaxed slightly. He should have known better than to underestimate his alpha. Tony was a good father. He knew what to do. “Oh. Thank you, Tony.”
Tony grinned a little. “No problem.” He leaned in to kiss his forehead. “He’s okay. I handled it. I’m glad you got to sleep.”
The omega relaxed more, stretching. His toes curled when he stretched his legs, trying to fight off the sleepy muscle tenseness. “I am too. I didn’t mean to sleep so long but…I really needed it,” he admitted. That much was obvious, he was sure.
“I know you did. I wanted to give you as much time as possible, honey.”
Peter watched him with a small smile. He saw the alpha rub his eyes and yawn but try to hide it. And he immediately felt guilty about any bitterness he felt about his own lack of sleep. Tony really was doing just as much as he was. Because he was such a good alpha to them.
Peter was so unbelievably lucky. He knew that.
He needed to push the little unpleasant feelings away. Things were good.
Yeah. Things were good.
#starker#peter parker#tony stark#tony x peter#my writing#tony stark x peter parker#tw omegaverse#omegaverse au#sweet and sour au#Bittersweet 🍋
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So we all headcanon EJ Caswell as a marvel fan right? But here I give you, EJ Caswell who uses the MCU/Marvel as a coping mechanism (plus the MCU/marvel is very good in my not so bias opinion 😁) to escape the constant pressure and stress of well, being a Caswell. Also because I'm a EJ caswell Stan and also a girl who's obsessed with Marvel, here are some of my more in detailed headcanons about EJ:
His favorite character is DEFINITELY Peter Parker because he admires how kind and nice Peter still can be after all the crap the world put on him (And EJ aspires to be at least a small percentage of what Peter is)
Tony Stark is also one of EJ's fav but he hates the old Tony (Iron Man 1) for obvious reasons (It reminds him too much of EJ 1.0 and his father)
HE HATES STEVE ROGERS ENDING IN ENDGAME. HATES IT. LOATHES IT. He spent months complaining and ranting to Ashlyn about how Marvel ruined Steve's arc and how it didn't make sense for Steve to go back to Peggy especially as Peggy had obviously moved on and married someone.
Ashlyn listens at first because she loves her cousin and that's what cousins (might as well as be siblings) do. But at some point while EJ is going on his a 100 rant about it she tells him to shut up about Endgame.
He's thankfully not one of the dudebros (even when he was EJ 1.0) because he was raised better than that (thank you Ashlyn and his uncle and aunt who loves him like their own)
Team Iron Man or Team Cap? EJ would glare at you and say, “Neither”.
No, I will not elaborate as I don't want to be canceled or yelled at by marvel stans (For the record, I'm team- [GUNSHOTS])
EJ Caswell let out the loudest shrill/ scream when they announced the Disney+ shows.
He also LOVES Wanda's character because who doesn't honestly and oh my god she is a total badass! Also the fact she struggles to be good due to her past and all her trauma but still, does her best and definitely doesn't deserve the hate she gets from some annoying fans.
He also loves Natasha Romanoff and wishes they gave her a movie/trilogy as she DESERVES it ://
He can't wait for Black Widow though (coming soon bffs)
Try to convince me EJ Caswell didn't SOB AND CRY when Natasha & Tony died. Oops sorry you can't. It's canon now he did.
He had a secret stan account for Marvel on his Instagram but because of how busy his senior year is, doesn't have time for it anymore
He has unhealthy attachments to characters in the MCU like Loki, Tony Stark, Gamora, Nebula and Peter Quill and it's definity not because he relates to having daddy issues
“Which character do you hate?”. No. Just. No. Don't ever ask EJ Caswell that because he would a hundred percent go on a longass rant of how all characters are unique and have their good qualities and flaws.
Whenever he's sad or feeling like crap he watches the first Avengers movie :)
Or probably Spider-Man Homecoming or Far From Home.
He doesn't know if he has a crush on Peter or MJ.
Probably both.
Ashlyn also makes it a rule for him to not recommend a marvel movie on movie night unless she lets him because “We've watched this movie 50 times EJ!”. “Okay and??!”.
Honestly, it's surprising how only Ashlyn knows about his obsession over Marvel.
Gina now knows too because she joins the two Caswells for movie night. Ashlyn relents and lets EJ choose the movie and OH boy, she swears EJ is as passionate about Avengers Infinity War as he had been about stealing the part of Troy and getting Nini back last year.
Gina likes it though and finds his nerding and geeking adorable.
One night, Ashlyn is out on a date with Big Red so it's just EJ and Gina tonight for a movie night (Them hanging out together alone has been increasing rather a lot lately) Gina agrees on watching Guardian of the galaxies volume 1 with him.
Gina asks if Nebula was a villian and EJ just.. pauses the movie. EJ proceeds to rant about how Nebula was just misunderstood and how she'll become a better character and that all she has done was only because Thanos made her become that, made her fight her sister, pressured her to become the 'best', and that her whole life, she only wanted her father to love and appreciate her.
Gina now realizes a part of the reason Nebula is one of EJ's favorites.
She doesn't bring it up though. Seeing the pure happiness radiating from EJ's face as he rants about the MCU (He somehow went from Nebula to talking about how Shuri was one of the coolest characters and how he wished Wakanda tech was real), she thinks he deserves to not be sad. They both do.
#this is so long and my writing is so cringy#pls still like me guys :)#bi EJ because heck yeah#portwell hints because them>>#hsmtmts#high school musical the musical the series#ej caswell#marvel#mcu#peter parker#tony stark#nebula#hsmtmts headcanons#ej caswell headcanons#portwell#ej x gina
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HEART'S REDEMPTION - CHAPTER 15
*Warning: Adult Content*
Ian Foley had not been able to lift Sam Asato on his own.
Carlos Martinez had helped him get the young man into the bed of his truck, assuring him as he did that Sam was still alive and that the drug would wear off, given time.
On the other hand, someone had to monitor him, make sure he kept breathing and keep him calm once he woke up.
Ian had planned to drive somewhere, out of town, pull over and stay with Sam himself but Carlos had climbed into the truck and pulled the young man across his lap.
‘What are you doing?’ Ian asked.
‘I’m coming with you,’ Carlos had said.
‘What about Toni?’
Toni Martinez wasn’t hurt badly but sh’ll have a hell of a headache later on.
‘Fuck, Toni,’ was Carlos’s reply.
‘Let’s go before she wakes up.’
Ian had stared at the young Latino man unsure what to do.
The way he had reacted when Sam had pulled the demon out of him, made Ian believe he wasn’t a willing participant of his Aunt’s plan but the Shifter still didn’t trust him.
Carlos had seen Ian hesitation and he had seen real fear in his eyes.
‘Please, just let’s get away from here before the demons show up, okay? You can drop me off somewhere later, if you want.’
Carlos hugged Sam’s chest as though clinging to a life line and the fact that Sam still had gold skin and horns had convinced Ian.
Toni had seemed disgusted in Sam even before he revealed his demon form and if Carlos has any similar bias, he was sure hiding it well.
Ian has been driving for about an hour now and every few minutes he looks back to check on Sam and Carlos.
Carlos gives him a thumbs up to indicate that Sam is doing okay but he’s been so still, so seemingly lifeless, his eyes open and unseeing, his body limp, that Ian feared the worst.
But Carlos promised him that Sam was unhurt and would wake up soon, fully recovered.
Ian on the other hand is not in good shape.
His shoulder hurts bad.
He can’t use his right hand and he’s been driving one handed.
The pain is hot like fire, like a million bees stinging him at once. It spreads from his shoulder, down his back and across his chest.
He’s sweating from the effort to keep his attention on the road and off the agony slowly burning down his will.
A loud thwack on the window behind him startles him from the fog of pained concentration and he turns to see Carlos rubbing the back of his head.
But that’s not what really captures Ian’s attention.
Sam is sitting up, beside Carlos, red eyes wide and sharp teeth bared, looking caught somewhere between confusion and fear.
Veering off the road, Ian comes to a stop in a cloud of dust.
He throw open his door intending to get out of the car and go to him but when he tries to move a searing pain cuts through him and him utters something like a scream.
A moment later, it is Sam who comes to him.
‘Ian?’ he says, leaning into the cab of Ian’s red truck, still looking a little unsteady on his feet, concern pinching his angled black brows.
“Are you okay?’
Ian shakes his head.
‘My shoulder is busted to hell,’ he says, gritting through his teeth.
‘What about you?’
‘I’m fine,’ Sam answers.
‘Just, I don’t know how to get rid of this.’ he adds, gesturing to his face.
‘What worked last time?’ Ian asks.
‘I don’t know,’ Sam whispers, his face deepening a few shades of gold and he glances away.
‘I think it was touching you. You know, the contact.’
‘If that’s all, why haven’t you changed back to normal, already. Carlos has been holding you for an hour?’ Ian asks and gasps as a sharper twinge of pain shoots through his shoulder.
Sam looks up to meet Ian’s eyes again.
‘I don’t want Carlos.’
The heat in Sam’s eyes cuts through Ian’s pain and misery and he feels a warmth in his chest that has nothing to do with his injured shoulder.
“Hey, I’m glad you are okay,” Ian says, reaching for Sam’s hand.
“But I think you might have to say like that for a while. At least until I get this shoulder fixed.”
Sam drops his gaze again.
“I think a kiss might be enough,’ he says.
‘That’s all I want right now, to kiss you.’
All Ian needs right now is a shot of morphine but if he can help Sam get back to normal...
‘I think I can manage a kiss.’
‘Okay. But you’ll have to do all the work, though.’
‘I can do that,’ Sam says, a wicked little smile curls his curved bronze lips and he leans in carefully to press his lips against Ian’s.
Despite the dark promise in his eyes, his kiss is soft and almost shy, sweet like strawberries and gentle as spring rain.
There is something reverent in the way he savours it and in an unselfconscious pleasure he takes in the joining of their mouths.
Ian feels Sam’s desire but he feels something as well.
When the young human/demon hybrid pulls away, his warm lips leaving with a final caress of breath, he is normal again.
His skin is golden ivory and his pretty almond shaped eyes are the color of coffee.
The look that Ian sees in Sam’s eyes when he blinks up at him is one that makes the older man momentarily forget his pain and one which he doesn’t know what he did to deserve it after only a few days.
Maybe he is wrong, but Ian thinks it looks a lot like love and it scares the shit out of him.
‘Damn and hell,” Carlos swears
Ian looks up and realizes at the Latino boy has been watching them from a few feet away.
‘What do I have to do to get me some of that?’ Carlos says, shaking his head. ‘Do you know how many receipts I’ve left my number on and how may times someone actually called? Like dozens and never. What am I doing wrong?’
“Why is he here, anyway?’ Sam asks, casting Carlos an unfriendly look.
‘He helped us,’ Ian explains, grimacing over a new wave of pain.
‘And now he’s going to hep us some more.’
‘I am?’ Carlos asks, sounding helpful.
‘Yeah. You can drive. I can’t anymore. I need you to take me to the nearest hospital, an urgent-care clinic would work too. Can you do that?’
‘Sure,’ Carlos agrees.
As carefully as he can, Ian slides over to the passenger side, followed by Sam who sits in the middle and Carlos takes the wheel.
‘You know, I had no idea Toni would double cross you like that,’ Carlos says, looking at Sam.
‘I mean, of all people, she should understand that it’s not you fault what you are. And she promised she would never use me as a vessel again. Not after the last time.’
‘What happened last time.’ Ian asks, more to take his mind of the pain than because he’s curious.
Carlos grimaces.
‘She used me as a vessel for a possession, trying to get information about the demon that killed Sonja. Only she went overboard. Lost her sense of where the demon ended and I began,’ the Latino boy says, pulling down the collar of his shirt to show three parallel burn marks.
‘Hot irons,’ he adds.
‘Shit,’ Sam says, given the other boy a more sympathetic look than he had done so far.
‘You should be careful, Carlos. You are just the sort of person Karin likes to collect. If Toni doesn’t have me to trade for information, you might be the next best thing.’
Carlos shakes his head.
‘Toni might be obsessed with revenge but she wouldn’t do that. Family doesn’t do that to each other.’
Ian sees Sam’s shoulders stiffen and reaches over with his good arm to take his hand who leans a little against the older man, trying not to jolt his injured arm.
‘Will you go back to her,’ Sam asks Carlos after awhile.
The other boy doesn’t answer right away.
‘Actually,’ he says, glancing over at them both.
“I was hoping I might ride along with you both for awhile. I was thinking that we could help each other out.’
Sam and Ian look at each other
‘Oh, yeah? How’s that?’
Carlos Martinez shrugs.
‘I mean, I get possessed easily and Sam can see the demons and exorcise them. Between the three of us, we basically have a living demon trap. I catch them, Sam gets rid of them and you, uh... do the heavy lifting.’
‘What would you get out of it?’ Sam asks.
‘I’d get away from Toni,’ Carlos replies.
‘I’ve relied on her all my whole life to keep me demon free. You are the first person I’ve met who is actually a better exorcist than she is, which is funny considering you’re a...’ he looks over and lifts his shoulders a little.
‘Also, I do want to find the demon that killed my mother.’
Carlos shifts in his seat and tightens his hands on the steering-wheel.
‘It’s strange actually. I thought Toni had stopped looking. She hasn’t done any exorcist work for years and then all the sudden, she’s willing to sell you out for a lead,’ he shakes his head.
‘I just don’t get it.’
Everyone has secrets,’ Ian offers.
‘Sometimes the people we think we know the best turn out to be strangers and sometimes people we have just met see right through us.’
Ian thinks for a moment and then gives Sam a light squeeze with his good arm.
‘It’s your call kid. Do we pick up a third wheel or stay a double act?’
Carlos glances over at Sam with a hopeful expression.
‘Okay fine. You can come. But Ian’s mine, understand. You make a move on him and I’ll pull you soul out through your nose.’
‘If Sam didn’t sound deadly serious and I was sure the little hot demon couldn’t actually do that, I would have laughed.’
Carlos stares at Sam, open mouthed and then he grins.
‘Fair enough.’ he agrees.
‘I wouldn’t want to share that either, if I could call it mine. But three doesn’t always have to be a crowd, you know.’
Carlos winks again and Sam growls but it’s not a very threatening sound in his current form, sort of like a fierce kitten, actually but Ian is not so dumb that he thinks there isn’t real danger behind it.
‘Great,’ Ian sighs, biting back a groan as his injured shoulder tortures him again.
‘Alaska, here we come.’
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Masterlist :)
figured I should probably post one of these at some point lmao, so here it is
Fanfiction
Spider-Man
• god did not craft us as alters but as dying gods
• 5/5, 14374 words, complete
Summary:
Peter Parker is not immune to trauma.
Far from it, in fact.
(With great power comes great responsibility, Peter.)
So when the building collapses, when the dilapidated remains of metal and concrete, and later searing scraps of plane, fall around him? Well, this is practically nothing.
Practically.
He’s fine, really. It just gets a little hard to breathe sometimes. Like, when he follows Happy into Stark Tower through the parking garage. Or when he turns on the news while doing homework and sees reports of a plane crash.
And sure, the small fire that broke out in the chemistry lab had sent his heart racing and caused sweat to bead on the back of his neck until even Ned asked if he was okay, but it’s nothing to worry about.
Regardless, he knows where those come from.
But this?
************************************
In which Skip Westcott is a repressed memory, until he returns.
• how do we survive this tombstone of cold
• 1/?, 3727 words, incomplete
Summary:
It doesn’t snow much in New York City.
Or rather, it does, but even the pigeons have no regard for the time it takes to solidify. Science claims that no two snowflakes are alike, but a young superhero in Queens calls bullshit. He’s been on the streets long enough to see miles of the same, withdrawn faces, all dredging along to a life there is no escape from
Peter knows the slush and black ice better than the snowdrifts of his childhood home, which is funny because he’s looking right at it.
This was not a good place, although his CPS file speaks only of the last incident of Mary and Richard Parker. Plane crash over the Mediterranean, no survivors, etc.
But Peter remembers his mother.
• the seas will whisper your name into the shore
• 2/?, 7674 words, incomplete
Summary:
Sometimes, Peter just wanted to sleep.
Not forever (although sometimes—), but long enough that he could shrug this ever-present exhaustion off his shoulders.
He’d joked with MJ, once, that he wished he could fall into a small coma, just to be able to take a break for a bit. Her response was a sarcastic, “Spider-Man will do that to you fast, you know?”
And then, Europe. Peter Parker, and all of his misfiring synapses, never wanted to sleep again.
• the way the pavement feels right before it catches bruised kneecaps
• one shot, 8485 words, complete
• to hell with good intentions (so to hell is where i’ll go), 1/2
Summary:
Peter’s got more muscle memory attributing to the subtle imploding of his trachea than in the act of leaving before it gets to that point.
He’s thinking of strawberries, and handcuffs, and water tinged red for just a bit too long.
His wrists are still sore.
• hindsight bias and the haunting of bullet casings
• one shot, 3720 words, complete
• peter parker’s free therapist: tony stark, 1/?
Summary:
The question trips out of his mouth like an accident, the same time as Tony speaks again.
“What’s going on?”
“—I thought I knew everything about you.”
Peter blinks. Blinks again.
His pseudo-father still looks like a wreck, just this time he could swear there are tears, and there’s one thing Tony doesn’t do and its cry so—
“…you do—? I haven’t really hidden anything?”
(that’s a lie. there are certain things peter will never admit to. he just hopes that it’s not—)
“You were under a lot of anesthetic. Could’ve been the pain too, I guess.” His voice is hoarse. “I don’t know, really, but you were, uh. Pretty out of it. So.”
• degeneration and entropy
• one shot, 4661 words, complete
• peter parker’s free therapist: tony stark, 2/?
Summary:
The older superhero can do little other than gape at his protégée. “Jesus, you look like shit. When was the last time you slept?”
Sheepish, Peter’s face scrunches up into his patented Peter Parker Thinking Face™, albeit a more sleep-deprived variation of it. “What’s today?”
”…Thursday?”
”Monday, during Chemistry. I think. Probably should’ve got detention but Mr. Harrington really doesn’t care as long as you get the class work completed.”
”Peter—!” Tony’s definitely placing this in the ‘Cause For Concern’ category that he’s been using all too frequently.
”Wow, my whole first name. I didn’t think you knew it.”
”Peter.”
The teen sighs, collapses into his usual chair next to their communal workbench. There’s a slump to his shoulders, a new edge that Tony’s never quite seen before. “What do you want me to say? That I can’t sleep? It’s obviously not from lack of effort. Sorry Mr. Stark, but you’re a genius and I figured you could read between the lines on this one.”
***
In which it’s the two-year anniversary of Ben’s death, and Peter is one (1) sleep deprived teenager with a certain concerned father-figure.
• what a profound honor, to be the last thing you touch on your way down
• one shot, 5671 words, complete
Summary:
At least Tony’s had time to prepare for this. To say that the kid looks blindsided is an understatement.
“You’re dead.” Dull, monotone. Fact that has had too much time to settle in the bottom of the murky water. His eyes flit between his friends and Tony, trying to figure out if this is some kind of cruel joke. “I watched you die.”
It takes a lot of effort, for the young hero to haul himself up and stumble forward a couple steps. Peter grabs onto a utility pipe for balance, shakes off the other’s attempts to help.
“You’re dead,” Tony throws back, a weighted ball launched at a court that has no player stationed at the baseline. 40 - 15, his serve.
”And yet—“ MJ butts in, “—you’re both still here and breathing. Care to elaborate?”
***
Or, Strange’s spell doesn’t just bring back the villains, but also a departed father figure from a universe where Peter died during the battle against Thanos instead of Tony.
Neither take it well, because they’re self-sacrificial idiots with too many complicated feelings.
• a study in absence: the map coordinates for purgatory
• one shot, 7786 words, complete
• to hell with good intentions (so to hell is where i’ll go), 2/2
Summary:
Peter knows he did the best he could, and yet— nothing.
Not a blip. No extravagant rescue, no confirmation that help is on the way.
No Tony.
Sure, he supposes the famous superhero has more important matters to attend to than rescuing his protégée from a couple of kidnappers. But still… rude. Peter kind of thought he’d be a higher priority.
And yeah, he’s almost an adult— he shouldn’t need rescuing, and he is definitely more than capable of taking a few (dozen) punches and some mediocre torture.
Peter’s just getting a bit tired, is all.
• the second resurrection of lingering demons
• 1/?, 5376 words, WIP
Summary:
Harley’s phone rings, and it takes a moment for it to even register, a moment longer to pick it up from the bathroom floor and wrangle his fingers enough to accept. The resounding static on the other end threatens to swallow him whole, and he might just let it.
”…Harley?” Pepper’s voice cuts through the white noise, and she doesn’t sound like herself. He listens to her breathe on the other end of the line, a long shuddering exhale. “Sweetie, did you… did you—?”
The words won’t come out the first time, just a scratchy sort-of wheeze. Stale air, cosmic vacuum, migrating glacier— he tries again, coughs this time like that will help anything. ”I watched it.”
For one, fervid moment, Harley wishes that he’d just dismissed the email, kept working on his homework. Never elected to join this monstrous reality in which Tony Stark might be capable of sexually abusing Peter on camera and waiting eight years to send it to their entire family.
Willful ignorance has never been such a compelling siren song luring him out to sea, never tasted so saccharine tucked in his back molars as it does right now.
He’s ravenous for it.
Stranger Things
• the world’s a little blurry (or maybe it’s my eyes)
• 3/5, 24,140 words, WIP
Summary:
When the others get back, Jason and his fellow teammates on their heels, they find themselves swept up in the chaos.
Dustin appears in front of the two adults, pulls Steve to his feet and shoves him towards the driver’s seat. “Come’on, we gotta go!”
Eddie’s lips part, ready to protest that someone experiencing regular bouts of hallucinations might not be the best driver, but Harrington’s already behind the wheel, shifting it into gear and directing the beast of a van onto the road. No one’s listening; talking over each other, too wound up.
Maybe if Eddie had said something then, made them all listen—
But Steve’s tired eyes meet his through the rearview mirror, and he keeps his mouth shut.
He keeps his mouth shut.
Teen Wolf
• there’s no point in screaming (if you never wanted to ask for help)
• 1/?, 3333 words, WIP
Summary:
Stiles would think there was a double meaning to his words, but this is Scott. He's so single-minded that you could throw a metaphor and he wouldn't even see it going over his head.
"Yeah, I guess. Thanks."
He hums, and Stiles refocuses on the materials splayed on on the floor in front of them. "You think there's a possibility that sirens could manifest as something other than women? Like the thing that someone desires most?"
"Maybe?"
(the answer is yes, but that comes later.)
_________________________________________
If you guys ever wanna talk feel free to DM me :)
#masterlist#fanfic#peter parker#tony stark#spider man#iron dad and spider son#teen wolf#marvel fic#marvel
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Media Bias (Avengers X Alien!Reader)
It was a request from anonymous reader and since I have limited experience with tagging, I am going to quote the person’s request here:
“ Hi can you please do Avengers x reader where the reader is like Starfire from og teen titans (but the reader is green and the blasts are blue) and the Avengers go on a talk show and the host is being very mean to her. Thanks”
So, dear anonymous. I hope you enjoy!“
Words: a whopping 4100
Y/n, open the door” I heard Sam thudding away on my door as I buried myself in the layers of blanket and put the air condition humid enough to cause a mini monsoon.
“Go away Wilson and leave me alone--” I bellowed on top of my voice.
“Y/n it’s been more than 7 hrs, you got to come out... whatever happened in the morning you gotta let it go--”
“I don’t wanna let it go... I am a national embarrassment--”
You must be thinking, what is the situation you’ve been dragged into. Let me pause there and rewind 17 hours back to give you a complete understanding which lead to this complete mess.
People think our story ended and sealed with Thanos never got to see what we go through in the New York penthouse. With the ongoing Pandemic on board, people are desperate to see us even more, as if it is the new Thanos and we are to defeat it. There is no greater sense of helplessness than playing the puppet of courage without doing anything. So whoever wrote that “after the defeat of big bad, the heroes rejoice” was a big idiot.
And thus, I found myself awake after hours, sitting alongside the broad glass panel that showed the completely stopped-in-time, shining in the dark cityscape of once bustling New York. A fleeting sense of desolation plagued me as I remember my own world in the verge of extinction. My breath almost stopped in the great worry of my fellow living being in this planet; the one who saved me from destitution--
“y/n, is that you?”A calm and concerned paternal voice broke the train of my thought. I sharply looked behind my shoulder to see a disheveled figure of man standing in the dark. By the tousled curls and the slouched hem of the sweatpants, I knew was Bruce.
“Urh, you startled me!” I said with a dismissive voice. I felt almost embarrassed to realize what I was thinking moments ago. I took a deep breath and tried to compose myself.
“It’s you who startled me y/n, what are you doing up so late?” Bruce said with a groggy voice rubbing his eyes rather irritatingly. “We have an important event to attend tomorrow first thing in the morning” he slowly moved towards from the shadowy part of the room to the path of dimmed light from the glass panel and spared a long glance at my face. The way he looked at me sometimes irritated me, because it was an inalienable fact that he fell into the same category of humans who express an unhealthy obsession with my kind: a scientist.
“It’s not like I enjoy staying up like you Lowly Human...I am as stressed for tomorrow as you are!” I tore my face from his ken to express my displeasure. In reply, he sighed disappointedly, which sounded patronizing in my already agitated mind.
“I wish you’d stop insulting my specie whenever you get upset...” he gently put his hand in my shoulder, but soon he withdrew and stepped back. “And what is that god-awful smell?”
Any female whether she is human or not is very sensitive to criticism, especially about how she appears, thus Bruce’s comment was not only offensive but hurtful as well. I could not restrain my anger and annoyance anymore, and I stood up sharply to face him “I just happen to wet myself in the rain yesterday at my detour downtown and it turns out it has too much sulphuric acid and it is peeling my skin away... right before when I am about to go up close on television.” My hand subconsciously moved up to my cheek, where flakes were forming in my otherwise jade smooth skin. “And you are telling me to stop insulting your specie... I will when you unicellular cretins will stop ruining your own environment—“ I folded my arms defensively, gazing away from Bruce’s face “--as if I don’t get ridiculed enough for my chrorophyllic skintone, and now I am shedding like a common reptile.”
“Alright alright I am sorry...” Bruce threw up his arms defensively, and his small paces back and forth showed his discomfort more than anything, “do you want something for your skin, CeraVe or something? I can fetch you some ice if you want?”
His apologetic gesture made my whole effort defeated; but my pride disrupted me from being apologetic “Forget it... as if those human manures would work on my skin—“ I heaved a sigh and looked at him again “must we do the thing? I mean I am not the only alien that set foot on earth in this decade, why must I be walked around like a showdog in front of all the people?”
For some moments Bruce did not answer me. I almost thought he was ignoring me, but then I realised that he must be contemplating on every word he wanted to say and every word that was running through his brilliant mind. Out of anyone in the team, Bruce was the visual hole, the less than heroic material: even with the Hulk. And for this, the society made sure that he would be self conscious for the rest of his life for his other identity. My annoyance almost melted to sympathy when I heard him speak in a rather frustrated voice.
“Y/N, I know that you are stressed about this and frankly I hate this stuff too, but this is very important for the people: for your people as well as ours. Not all things that come from the space are benign and people need reassurance that you are not hostile. I hate this too, but it is for the greater good!”
“Greater good, greater good... it is always for the greater good!” The same old daily whining of lofty agenda made me sick “I am sick and tired of these Brucie, I don’t want to do this anymore... I am tired about people asking me weird questions and cretins posing as scientists trying to push probes on me the first chances they get-- I wish I could just disappear with the portal that brought me in this cursed place!“
Bruce came closer and grabbed my shoulders gently “Don’t say that y/n... otherwise we wouldn’t have the means to counterattack all those aliens—“ my silence might have given him the cue that he wasn’t doing a very good job at convincing. His wavering eyes fixed on my face once again as he spoke “okay, here is a deal: how about it is the last time you appear in public, hm? Once you satisfy them that you are part of the team, I swear people will leave you alone... they left the Hulk alone too once they understood that he is one of the good guys!”
“No but...“
“No ifs and buts... go, and have some sleep. Let me look in the lab if we have some squalanes and peptide solutions lying around—“ he said with a paternal affection and disappeared into the dark passage which lead to his room
“Thanks Brucie you are the best—“
I couldn’t help but to smile a little. Humans!
...
“This is a bad idea I am telling you--“ I told Bruce with an hushed tone as the makeup artist went on with a puff on my face for the millionth times. The rest of my team was behind me, getting the same attentions to their dismay. I could tell Bucky was downright uncomfortable as his makeup artist had a hard time getting not distracted by his bionic arm; and Wanda was downright glaring at the man who kept flicking the brush on her nose.
“relax y/n, you are smart and you are friendly, you are going to ace this and trust me people are going to love you--“ Bruce said with gritted teeth to make sure no one could tell what he was saying. He almost flinched as some of the powder made into his nose and the makeup artist followed him up with a q-tip.
“My face is itchy...“ I whispered again, trying not to gouge my face out with my nails as the powder sat on the flaky part of the cheek. If this wasn’t a studio I would have scratched my face like a lunatic and ended up as someone who was attacked by a bear in the mountains. And I was glad that I was standing beside Bruce who knew how not to go overboard with the things. Clint would have brushed them off, Wanda and Bucky would have panicked, and Sam’s gestures no matter how genuine would have made me laugh.
“Wanda already told the makeup artist to spray you with Squalane, your face isn’t half as bad as it were yesterday night“ Bruce then went on politely gesturing the makeup artist to spray the stuff Bruce brought from the lab in a clear bottle, and the look on the Makeup Artist’s face was between annoyance and bursting into tears.
“Brucie...“ “I don’t wanna mess it up--“ I said nervously as we walked into the couch and settled with the others.
“Trust me you won’t... “ Bruce graciously consoled me.
The cameraman cued and we were all gestured to look into the main camera as the lights in front of us adjusted accordingly. Within all hustle and bustle, the host walked in like a royalty, and by the looks of his face and those following him with makeup and refreshment, he had a really bad morning.
“We will go on air in 3, 2 and 1”
“Good Morning America, this is your host Justin Fallon and welcome to another episode of The Early Show. Today we have with us some really special guests. You might know them from News, the murals, the comics and the Merchs please welcome our own global superheroes: The Avengers. Welcome to our show” the host said with an uncomfortable friendliness and turned towards us.
"Thanks for having us with you" Sam answered graciously, with a little awkwardness. I could understand why; it was always Tony, Steve and Natasha who spoke in public. After such a terrible loss, he is struggling to fill up their shoes for the sake of our public image. He had been wrapped up into a pretty bad controversy recently for succeeding as Captain America and it had a pretty bad toll on him—to the point his speech kind of went from cheerful to composed in an unnatural way.
"It’s been way too long since our morning couch looked so colorful and it surely brightens up the day.” The host said with an obligatory politeness. Although the term was innocent enough but it seemed not so—I instantly froze up and million things started flying inside my head: was I looking good enough, is my patches showing under the layers of power and squalane. Turns out it was not me alone. From the corner of my eye I could sense the tension behind me from Clint and Bucky and I know it was different than mine. The host must have wanted the old team, and looked like he was stuck with the mediocre leftovers.
“Thank you...“ Sam replied.
“So here you guys are after averting the big wipeout crisis, in the quiet and chilling, so how does it feel to be in the pensive from being hyperactive all the time?“
“Well, at first it did feel kind of boring and lack luster, but slowly we are adjusting to it. With the ongoing Pandemic crisis I think we just have to adjust to the situation. In a way, I think we are all helping each other by staying inside and recuperating.” Sam answered diplomatically.
“That’s so nice” the interviewer said quite curtly and then changing the topic he sharply turned to Doctor Banner “I know of all you people Dr. Banner will find this Lockdown Leisure slightly more comforting, isn’t that so Doctor Banner?”
Wait, what was that? Was that even normal? Sam was sitting in the front and after him Bucky, then Wanda and then Bruce. Should not he come gradually? Breathe... maybe I am reading too much into this. Keep a friendly face, don’t think too much... the entire nation is watching... this is the one time I have to do things right! It’s for me, my team who housed me and my people.
I had to give props to Bruce for managing things calmly despite his claims about public speaking. He politely replied “Well theoretically it should be but it’s not like causes of anger cannot exist within the so called peaceful environment if you think about it, but I am glad you showed your concern” and like a pro, reached out to the glass in front of him to sip some water—like some real celebs in talk shows.
“Isn’t that true! So Solaris, how does it feel to be surrounded by the icons of the earth?”
I wasn’t really ready for the sudden attention. For a second I blanked out completely and gaped my mouth like a complete idiot. My stupefied face must have been quite prominent because the host tried to laugh it off lightly to divert the attention. I am still wrapping my head around the fact how some humans work so beautifully under so much attention—If I could choose between blasting off alien armies and speaking in talk shows, I will take the aliens instead.
“I..I--It’s quite fun... there is never a dull moment with them--“ I manage to utter, and thankfully it wasn’t a gurgling sound from a deep abyss.
“The thing is, being the most newest member, you sort of have a mystery around you, the kind of a Blue Comet sort--“
“Oh thank you— “ great going me, like a real talk show celeb—keep it up!
“So why don’t we break that down... Solaris, is that true that you came from a whole another galaxy which is not Milky Way?” the Talk show host asked, reading from a small piece of card.
Finally, something I can talk about all day: stars, planets and galaxy. I will have to slay this, I chanted inside and replied after drawing a breath “Yes that’s true. I am from Planet Auriga from Pleiades system. Our Sun is Alcyone, the second brightest star right after Aldebaran. You people call our system Taurus Constellation--”
“--so much astrophysics, take notes kids they might ask you at the NASA interview.“ the talk show host interrupted. It annoyed me greatly because I could finish the words I worked so hard to speak confidently. So that’s how Bruce must feel all the time when people interrupted him when he explains things. However the host went on as if nothing happened “For a near human creature in this planet, do you identify more with the Professor X’s troop or with the Avengers?”
Near human creature? My race is literally the most Superior in all of galaxy.
“I don’t really understand what you mean...” I said as politely as I could manage.
“I mean isn’t it hard to fit in when you are the only alien in the group--“
The flippant remark was rude and I tried not to wrap my head around it. I recalled Bruce’s words to keep cool and maintain a neutral face replied : “I mean I am not the only one, Thor is also not of the earth and he is a darling to be around. Alien or not I think I have learned a lot about myself and the ways of earth by spending time with this wonderful people?“
I could hear the audience clapping and cheering with my reply. A surge of pride swept across my chest and I smiled slightly at the audience.
“How sweet--“ the host said, keeping with the cheerful mood “as the outer world people are coming into the planets, we think a lot of things are shifting, do you find it hard to cope into the earth from where you come from--“
Finally, a thoughtful question, I made a solid eye contact with the host and replied “No, the atmosphere is pretty much the same in Auriga, but I think humans can do a lot better taking care of the environment. I know for a fact that millions of planets and their lifeforms were extinct because of excesses I see on earth.”
The thoughtfulness of the host was only for so long “The girl’s been around... if you know what I mean—“ he commented with a little wink, and from the audience’s laugh I knew he didn’t mean something polite or mildly positive. After the laughter subsided, he turned again to me “I dig the midnight blue hair... it is so contradictory and yet it works“ he complimented “because you know scale and hair are not something we see very often in our planet--“
Excuse me, what was that supposed to mean?
“--so tell me are the lapis cascades all natural? I mean they are not dyed at all?”
“No they are not... the special keratin bond that reflect the blue pigment of the natural light but they are actually transparent—“ I added objectively.
“So that means in the right lighting you don’t need to mow the bush—“ the host said with a curved smile on his lips, and the audience went on laughing in the same manner they did moments ago.
Even under the blowing airconditioner, I started t feel really warm around my neck “I really don’t know what you mean; you are making any sense at all! Do you guys need special light to mow the bush, do you do in the solstices or during the eclipses—“ this time I didn’t hide the fact that I was annoyed.
“--she is really really funny you guys--“ the host again smiled and acted like I was a stone wall and my reaction didn’t register in his mind at all. “So you are saying you don’t mow your bush at all?“
“I live in a New York Penthouse, there is no bush--“ honestly if this wasn’t a dumb talk show, I would have taught this impudent human a lesson.
The host looked a little uncomfortable as our eye contact lasted for several seconds. He cleared his throat and went on “Okay you guys, she just clarified that there is no bush, so let’s move on to your...your look... I am so fascinated by it, it’s so reptile chic--“
What’s your fascination with cold blooded animals? Are you asking to die like one?
“Um, thanks...?!”
“So how do you manage to maintain this--“
That was honestly the last straw. This host is impolite and rude and he leeches off the discomfort of his talk show host. When this realisation hit, all my self-control and self preservation went out of the window. The vacuum was replaced by the sheer annoyance towards the host who deliberately mistreated us since the beginning.
“Do you think that’s how I live, maintaining my skin and mowing the bush--“ my pitch rose from my previous composed tone “I mean what kind of questions are these?“
The host was still wearing his phony smile on his face, but I could see the colour slightly draining off his face “No I was just asking, because the audience wants to know--“
“I think the audience is smart enough to understand that they cannot get the green skin on natural blue hair, so can you move on to a more sensible question?“ I answered heatedly and defensively at the same time, and as I spoke I felt the aura of tension shifting from discomfort to sheer panic.
“Y/n... don’t do this--” I heard Bucky whisper very faintly from above.
“Solaris, don’t get me wrong, but we don’t always get a green-skin hottie on the morning couch, don’t be offended!” he said while he gestured covertly to cut the camera on the other side. I have to give this man an applause , I could tell he had busted all his courage but he kept the face of nonchalance too good to be true—no wonder he sat on this chair for so long.
“What’s your obsession with the skin colour?—“ I said heatedly as I stood up from my seat “Don’t you dare cut the camera... don’t you dare! Do you think you humans are the epitome of beauty from which point everyone in the galaxy should confirm? I am sick of this... Everyone, I am so sorry for your wasted time but no more of this!”
“Solaris--“ this time it was Sam’s voice that implored me from the sides. For a split second I felt bad for him, because as Captain America, he would have to take the heat from the public. But I was at the point of no return. If I back out now, I would be called a pushover and I would have to endure that image for the rest of my life in the earth.
“You know what, as you are so obsessed with my looks, I would love to show you another thing of mine that is blue--”
Blast
So long story short, Solaris goes to a morning talk show, Solaris encounters a rude host and Solaris blasts him with her Blue Sun Beam. Biggest disaster ever!
The thudding outside the door would not stop, and honestly their over attention was getting on my nerves “honestly, why don’t you go away... what are you, my royal nanny?”
“Very funny Solaris... now come out and get some food--” this time it was Bucky who spoke. Although he was the shortest to reply, but it made me well up. He had the shittiest history amongst all of us: hunted, betrayed, manipulated and now sidelined—how can I see my problems bigger than him.
“How can I... I ruined everything, all the reputation you built throughout the year, I blew it up within 3 minutes, how can I show my face to you guys! I was supposed to be the superior being--“
A moment of silence followed. But then the old familiar calm voice spoke from the other side
“y/n... It’s not about superior or inferior, you were just very very honest with your feeling! sometimes it’s good for the public, sometimes it is not. I mean look at me--I have struggling with my anger all my life and god knows the stuff I have wrecked in Hulk state. It’s okay to make a mistake... no one blames you!”
“Ha ha right...“ I replied sarcastically, feeling mad about how well Bruce understood my situation.
“Honestly, the way you acted today... Tony would have been proud!”
I could not hold myself anymore. All the feeling that has been plaguing me until now: embarrassment, guilt, confusion, sadness... all came down like a thundering rain with that one statement. I rushed and slammed the door open and jumped on Bruce to embrace him into a tight hug. At first I could tell Bruce was taken aback, but soon his firm arms snaked under my back to hold me tightly.
“I am so sorry... I ruined you all--“ I hid my face in Bruce’s shoulder. Suddenly I felt a gentle pat on my back, I straightened up and looked, it was Sam. His awkward cautionary expression was gone and he looked cherry as the old days “As Captain America, I cannot condone your behaviour, but as Sam... well, that jerk deserved it--“ he reached for his pocket and took out his cellphone “and hundred thousand people in New York agree with you“
I looked at him with a curious expression as he gave me his phone. When I looked at it, it was a tabloid video that had the clip of me blasting the host and it had—
“Stars in galaxies!... 100K likes?” I exclaimed
“And look down, there are comments too--” Bucky scrolled down from behind my shoulder to descend to the white space.
That jerk deserves it, he was literally harassing her...You go Solaris #MeToo
Solaris is so cool, I wish I was as cool as her.
Ugh, I hate that morning show host, if I was in her place I would have thrown him off the stark tower, #SunQueen
Racists never change, and We stan our color positive hero #SolarisRocks
Humans...
...
Okay, that took a lot of time because at first I didn’t know how to work on the request, then I had to go back and forth and rewrite most of it two times because I wasn’t convinced it was good. So I sincerely hope it’s good because I am freaked out as hell.
I also gave reader a name because she is inspired by an alien character in TeenTitans called “Starfire”. So I call her Solaris, and was constantly reminded of Solar of Mamamoo (TMI)
I don’t hate on Fallon, I just used his name because it is recognisable by American public and I also had to see a lot of Jimmy Fallon’s show to write about the Talk Show plot. I was also greatly inspired by Naomi Campbell, RDJ and Nicki Minaj’s interviews.
#avengers x reader#alien reader#skin color#teen titans og#starfire inspired#yay I got a request#rude talk show imagine#avengers x reader imagine
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martha and toni’s worldviews
thinking about the profoundly different ways toni and martha reacted to their trauma. toni is like a lot of traumatized kids in that the threat response part of her brain has been primed to stay incredibly active, so she lives a lot of her life on the edge of her fight/flight/freeze response. “you want me to be in a battle like everyone’s against me and only bad shit happens,” martha accuses. and to some extent, yeah, that’s how toni sees the world—she’s cynical and wary and protective. which makes sense, given how much shit she’s gone through. every new bad thing (her dad, her mom, the abuse and neglect of her foster homes, regan) becomes an example of confirmation bias, affirming her worldview. (and like! in many ways she’s right! she’s a poor indigenous lesbian in foster care! the social structure she exists within is against her, and that does require a lot of threat response on her part, even if her outbursts often end up more self-destructive than protective.)
but for martha, her primary defense mechanism is denial. her brain blocks out the trauma that she can’t deal with and she retreats into a time of safety, before everything went down with dr. ted, and holds fast to her optimistic outlook from that time. “you can’t keep living in this fairy-dust world where bad shit never happens, you know, everything’s gonna turn out in the end,” toni shouts at her. but reckoning with killing the goat means martha has to reckon with the fact that harm is sometimes inescapable. she has to reckon with both having been harmed (horribly harmed, at an incredibly young age) and having to harm. and facing both of those threatens to break down every protective wall of positivity she’s built. so it makes perfect sense that she fights it for as long as she can, that she clings to the idea of foraging. the alternative is excruciatingly painful.
martha accuses toni of only seeing bad shit; toni accuses martha of never seeing bad shit. that dissonance creates such profound friction between them. and i think toni does understand martha’s coping strategy—bernice outright tells her, after all, “it was just a fantasy world she created because her reality was too painful.” later, when bernice mutters about martha’s lies, “told to the damn court,” toni replies, “guess they don’t feel like lies to her.” this fits into toni’s framework of understanding: bad things happen, and a very bad thing happened to her friend, so she blocked it out because she couldn’t deal with it.
but i think martha has a harder time understanding toni’s, because to understand toni’s fundamentally involves grappling with how many ways the world is fucked up and has hurt those she loves. instead, she has to interpret toni’s as an active choice to view the world the way she does, an active choice to “create all sorts of aggro drama.” and martha loves toni, and she feels for her, and she supports her (honestly with too few boundaries until 1x04). but for as long as she keeps up her defensive rose colored glasses, she can’t really understand her, at least not on a cognitive level, because it looks less like reacting and more like instigating.
anyway, they better not kill martha, because i feel like her killing of the goat—and by proxy, the smashing of her fantasy about what happened with dr. ted—will have serious impacts on all this. i want to see how her worldview shifts, and how she and toni relate to each other through what comes next.
there’s definitely a lot more to be said about this!!! if people have thoughts about this please add them!! i’m just sitting here Thinking man i love them both so fucking much
#the wilds#toni shalifoe#martha blackburn#the wilds meta#can't write my two essays for school so how did this turn into one? fucked if i know#obviously there's a lot of nuance in that we see toni DOES see good things in the world#and martha does have some understanding that bad shit happens#but this is broad strokes you know#martha x toni
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Right Where You Were Meant To Be (Bucky x Plus-size!Reader)
Fandom: Marvel
Characters: Bucky x Plus-size!reader
Warnings: Fluff, hurt/comfort, body-shaming
Story type: One-shot
Word count: 2.7k words
Summary: Reader has a crush on Bucky the second she looked at him but she also has feelings of self-consciousness about her body and doubts she’d ever end up with Bucky or any guy like Bucky. That all changes one night at one of Tony’s parties.
(A/N: This is a cute little one-shot idea I had and just wanted to write out. I feel there aren’t many plus-size!reader stories so I wanted to make my own. I’m a chubby girl and felt like I needed some love, lmao. Any mistakes I take responsibility for, this story wasn’t beta read, so I apologize for any mistakes. I hope you enjoy nonetheless!!! Also, the gif isn’t mine, but he just looks so precious <3)
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It all started when you looked at him for the first time. He had just moved into the Tower, and you had just gotten the job as Tony's new assistant since Pepper had become CEO of Stark Industries. Because you worked in an environment with superheroes who were very fit and healthy, you had become self-conscious of yourself; whether it would be what you wore, the things you ate, or just how your body looked in general.
Being a bigger girl, it often took a toll on your mental health when you would notice the glances, the whispering, the judgmental stares, and how shopping for clothes in your size was difficult, and it made you feel like you had to lose weight to fit in and belong. You felt alone and isolated.
You didn't have any friends; you didn't even talk to many of your co-workers, and just kept to yourself a majority of the time. When Bucky moved in, you noticed he did the same. He didn't speak much to the rest of the team, he mostly stayed in his room, and only hung around Steve. Bucky was very fit, and his muscular body showed it whenever he wore tight-fitted clothing. You would never wear tight-fitted clothing for fear of having your plumpness accentuated.
After five months working for Tony and having a more friendly relationship with the rest of the team, you had built a few close bonds with some of the heroes. Wanda and Natasha were your closest girlfriends and would regularly have 'Lady's Nights' every Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Tony, Clint, Sam, and Steve were like your older brothers and would look out for you.
You and Steve made it a routine to do small exercise and yoga in the afternoons just after 4 o'clock. How this all started was because you wanted to accomplish small goals for yourself, as Sam told you to do to help with your mental health.
"Steve," You called out as you stepped into the Tower's gym, the one place you knew where to find Steve if he wasn't in the common room.
"Oh, hey (Y/N)! What's up?" Steve turned to face you as he held the punching bag still while he watched you walk closer to him, noticing you fidgeting with your fingers nervously.
"I just... I wanted to start doing light exercises, you know, to boost my endorphins, and so I have something to do in the afternoons when I've finished with work." It wasn't a complete lie, but it just sugar-coated the fact that you just wanted to lose weight to gain confidence in yourself.
Steve had agreed to help you; he wouldn't push you too much either because he didn't want you to strain anything and not push you out of your comfort zone too much. Both of you would exercise for an hour each day in the afternoons. This routine had been going on for six weeks, and you were enjoying it. You felt better about yourself each week when you would check your progress and write down how much you lost during the week; you were more confident than you were all those weeks ago before asking Steve for help.
During one of those afternoon exercises, you and Steve were both in the Adho Mukha pose with Steve wearing his usual tight t-shirt that you swore was a size too small, and shorts while you wore a loose, black tank top, and tight-fitted leggings that complemented the shape of your plump ass. You were so in the zone that you hadn't heard the gym doors open and the sound of footsteps coming closer to you. Bucky stood behind you and Steve, him getting an eyeful of your butt while he cleared his throat to catch his best friend's attention.
"Hey, Bucky! I didn't notice you were there. (Y/N) and I were doing some yoga, would you like to join us?"
You. Were. Mortified. You quickly stood up beside Steve and looked down at your feet, trying to avoid looking at Bucky after having your ass practically in his face.
"Uh, I kinda have to get ready for 'Girl's Night' tonight, but I think Bucky can keep you company." You nervously spoke, having your words jumble out quickly due to your inner-embarrassment. "I'll see you later, Steve!"
You bolted out of the gym as fast as your legs could go and made it up into your room without another incident. When you flopped onto your bed, you let out a loud, exhausted sigh before closing your eyes shut tightly. 'Why did I have to act like a nervous wreck? You didn't even let him talk for Christ's sake!' After beating yourself up over the little incident, you started to get ready for 'Girl's Night' with Nat and Wanda.
It was two hours into 'Girl's Night' and you, Nat and Wanda had, at least, drank four glasses of Kraken Rum and about three shots of Vodka. You were more relaxed and carefree, enjoying your time with your best friends while gossiping about an episode of Criminal Minds you all saw the other day together.
"Not gonna lie, I would love to have a man like Morgan. Have you seen his muscles? And how he kicks down doors like a badass?" You gushed.
"That is true, and I fully believe Morgan and Garcia should be together. They have chemistry and look so cute!" Wanda loved her Morgan and Garcia ship.
"Eh, I like to have a super cute genius but that's just my opinion" Nat took a sip of her fruity vodka drink while shrugging her shoulders.
"Of course you would, you're with Bruce and that's a little bias, Nat." You gently shoved your red-haired friend playfully.
You and Wanda giggled like school girls when Natasha scoffed before she pointed an accusing finger at you.
"Well, says you, (Y/N)! You practically drool whenever you see Barnes."
That shut you up quickly. 'How does she know?! Play it off'
"That's very funny Nat, but I don't know what you mean."
"Don't bullshit me, (Y/N). I've seen the way your cheeks get all pink and how your eyes are glued to him whenever he walks by. You're so smitten it's grossly cute." Then Wanda turned to you with a small smirk on her face.
"Maybe you should ask him to work out with you and Steve!"
Flashbacks of your embarrassment earlier that day made your face go pale. 'Absolutely not'. You shook your head furiously, staring at your two friends with fear. There was no way you'd have the guts to do such a thing, not after how you acted around him before. Plus, you didn't want him to look at you with disgust when he looks at you working out. You shake off all the negative thoughts before finishing off your last bits of rum.
"I think I'm going to head off to bed now, gotta wake up early tomorrow. Tony wants me to help him organize and plan a gala party to celebrate his newest project. And when I say to 'help him' I mean I'll be doing most of the work while he hides away in his lab with Bruce." You said before walking off and waving the girls goodbye.
2 weeks later...
You had most of the gala planned out. You had booked a cute catering company to organize some food dishes for everyone and even hired a group of people to decorate one of the large common rooms that would fit all the guests on Tony's guest-list. You had even bought a cute new dress to wear for the party. The party was starting that night at 7:30 and you would hopefully get everything done while having an hour and a half to spare to get ready.
When the decorating and planning finished, you quickly made your way to your room and got showered and changed. You stood in front of your mirror for quite some time, nitpicking every flaw you could see, judging your appearance because you knew how the other women at the party were going to look flawless and have every man swooping in for them. A sudden knock on your door snapped you out of your negative thoughts.
"(Y/n), you ready?" Wanda's voice called from the other side.
"Y-yeah! I'm coming now." You dashed for the door to get away from the mirror so you can't put yourself down even more. Once opening the door, Wanda linked your arm with hers, and both of you walked toward the elevator.
Telling FRIDAY which floor, you both arrived just as a few of the guests were mingling around; drinking, eating, and chatting. You glanced around, hoping to see the familiar faces of your friends, spotting Sam, Nat, and Clint near the bar where Natasha was serving the drinks. Tony was standing next to Pepper and being an absolute flirt as always while Steve and Bucky were standing near a corner with drinks in hand. Before you could make your way over to the bar, Wanda told you to wait where you were while she goes to quickly touch up her make-up, disappearing before you could say a word. You stood there awkwardly and looked around, making sure everything was going swimmingly until you felt a presence behind you. A tap on your confirmed that someone was indeed behind you.
You turned around to see a group of two slender women and three muscular men staring at you with smug and cocky smiles on their faces.
"Can we get some more drinks? And make them with a little more alcohol this time." One of the men quirked an eyebrow, waiting for you to scurry off to grab their drinks.
"I'm sorry, but I'm not part of catering. I'm-"
"You certainly look it though, I mean, you're not dressed like you're here as a guest. The dress you're wearing looks like the other catering staff." A woman spat, her eyes narrowed at you. You started to feel self-conscious about your outfit now, realizing the color-scheme looked very similar to the catering staff.
"Plus, the dress isn't that flattering for your body hun. We can practically see your muffin top and panty lines with how tight that dress is on you." The other woman commented while she leaned to the side to glance at more of your plush figure.
A stinging sensation began to appear behind your eyes, feelings of doubt, and an anxiety attack began to make themselves known. So looked away from the group and quickly made for the elevator, shooting Wanda a quick text saying you weren't feeling too well. 'How stupid of me to think I even looked good or that I could fit in at the party.' By the time the elevator doors reached your floor and the doors opened, hot tears were falling down your cheeks as you tried to furiously wipe them away with zero results. The tears kept flowing down as you began to walk down the hallway to your room; quiet footsteps barely making noise as they followed you. Just as your hand settled on the door handle, a warm hand clasped onto your shoulder gently. With a yelp, you spun around with a jump to look at your "attacker", only to find a pair of stormy blue eyes staring at your teary eyes intensely.
Bucky's eyes held hints of concern and worry, but it was hard to see because he was good at hiding his emotions, and the fact that your eyes were blurry from crying.
"You okay, (Y/n)? I saw you leave the party quickly and noticed how fast your breathing was." Bucky had to look down at you because he was so tall, or was it because you were just very short?
"I'm fine, Bucky. I just don't do well in crowded places or with so many strangers. I got a bit overwhelmed but it's fine now." You weakly smiled but he could see right through it, he always did.
"You had a panic attack after speaking to a group of people, and judging by the looks they gave you while talking to them, I can only believe it wasn't a pleasant conversation." Bucky then brought both his flesh and metal hands to cup your face while he peered into your eyes more. "Tell me what happened, doll."
You sighed, you knew he wasn't going to let this go. Even though you both barely spoke to each other, he still cared for you like the both of you knew each other for years. Something about his calm voice and caring nature helped your nerves settle.
"They thought I was part of catering and asked if I could get them more drinks. I told them I wasn't catering, only for them to make snarky comments about my outfit and body. But it's fine, I'm used to having those comments made to me, I've dealt with those types of people all my life." Your hands gently held his and tried to move them away from your face but Bucky didn't budge.
"You don't believe them, right? I mean, I think the dress looks good on you. It shows off your curves and any man who doesn't get blown away is blind."
You gave a humorless laugh and shook your head at Bucky, looking down at the floor.
"You're just saying that to be nice to me, Buck. We both know girls like me don't belong in a place like this, or a party like that. You can go back to the party, I don't want to waste more of your time." You went to turn away when Bucky held your upper arms tightly.
"Not a chance, doll. I'm not a fan of crowds myself and was about to leave the party myself until I saw you run away. I'd rather spend my time with you and making sure you don't ever think that you don't belong."
You both stared at each other for a few seconds, his stare was intense with adoration and love while you stared at him in shock that he'd want to spend time with you. Before you could blink, Bucky leaned down and you felt his soft lips on yours, his arms wrapping around you and caging you into a warm and gentle embrace. Your hands rested onto his firm chest while his hands rested on your lower back, just above your butt. At first, you were in shock but then you gave in to the kiss and snaked your arms around his neck, your fingers embedded into his long hair.
The kiss was full of passion, and so much love that you didn't think it was possible. When the need for air was too much, you both separated and looked into each other's eyes once again.
"H-how? Why me? We barely know each other!"
"Because, (Y/n), I've been smitten for you since I first laid eyes on you but didn't have the guts to tell you. Steve's been a punk and trying to get me to join your work out sessions for weeks but I was too nervous to do it." Bucky's cheeks tinted red as he chuckled.
"And why's that? I was scared that if saw me working out, that you'd be grossed out by my body." You explained, chewing on your bottom lip.
"I could never be grossed out, sweetheart. I love a woman with curves and plumpness to her. I was nervous that if I watched you work out, I would try to make a move on you too fast and scare you away. I didn't want that to happen." Bucky grabbed your chin and leaned in again, his lips almost touching yours. "And you looked downright sexy in those tights, they shape your ass well."
You gasped and lightly smacked his shoulder while he smirked at you. His playfulness coming through. You made the first move this time and got onto your tippy toes to kiss him. This is was quicker than the first but still held the same emotions. With so much strength you underestimated he had, Bucky lifted you up, your legs wrapped around his waist as he opened your door and carried you over to your bedroom. Both of you watched a bunch of movies in your room; many kisses were shared before you both passed out, cuddled up under your fluffy blankets, safe in Bucky's arms. Right where you were meant to be all along.
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Thanks for reading!!! <3 <3 <3
#bucky x y/n#bucky x original female character#bucky x reader#bucky x plus size reader#plus size reader#plus-size!reader#reader insert#reader x bucky barnes#reader x bucky#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x plus size reader#fanfic#bucky barnes fanfic#fanfiction#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky fanfic#bucky fanfiction#bucky needs a hug#fluff#hurt#hurt/comfort#comfort#body shaming#curvy body#reader needs a hug#x reader#first x reader fanfic#bucky love#bucky barnes
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20 Questions: Writer’s Edition
tagged by the beloved @myrmidryad
this is a LONG one so here’s a cut to avoid do you love the colour of the sky syndrome
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
101 after a recent purge... no one may know about my Past
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
329004! used to be about 350k but again... purge
3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
on ao3 i’ve written for (chronologically) doctor who, skyfall, discworld, les mis, star trek, lord peter wimsey, marvel (various), in the flesh, red vs blue, roosterteeth rpf, check please, hockey rpf, star wars, daredevil, rivers of london, dishonored, emmerdale, dirk gently, holby city, hot fuzz, kj charles, guardian, the covert captain, taskmaster rpf, good omens, ghosts, roswell new mexico, leverage, schitt’s creek, the magicians, 9-1-1, it chapter two, the magnus archives, the old guard, the mandalorian, the ritual, the locked tomb
way back on the pit of voles i wrote for twilight, harry potter, hetalia and xmen first class. and on the newsround chatrooms i wrote exclusively harry potter fic about my oc neville and luna’s daughter
as you can tell i am not prone to staying in one fandom writing wise, i tend to end up with one complete fic and seven abandoned wips concealed deep in my google drive
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
finally see what it means to be living (captain marvel, carol/maria, i really hit the zeitgeist with this one i think i was something like the fifth fic in the ship tag)
do whatever you think (the magnus archives, this series is actually #2-7, then #8 #9 and #11 for me so i’m going to cheat a bit)
standing in a world of my own (daredevil, matt/foggy/karen, another zeitgeist hit! really miss writing for daredevil actually... it’s a perennial fave)
a winding road that stretches towards the truth (iron man, tony/rhodey, i STILL don’t know when this got so many kudos. i swear i looked away when it was at 100 and suddenly it ended up here)
where the long shadows grow (star trek aos, kirk prime/spock prime, thank god some people are checking the prime kirkspock tag is all i’m saying!)
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
i don’t really Do angsty endings... possibly a blanket of stars just because i ended it on something of a cliffhanger and then completely zoned out of rnm for long enough that i forgot where i was going with it. there was definitely the intention of fixing things but then i just... did not do that. and now the show is on s3 and i’m over a season behind! life comes at you fast
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
where the long shadows grow, because it reunited kirk prime and spock prime and they DESERVE TO BE HAPPYYYY. i’m a complete sucker for presumed dead/back from the dead stories, actually, so on a similar theme i have two (TWO) daredevil fics which follow the trope, one about ray coming back post-s2 (might never be normal again) and one about foggy and matt reuniting post-endgame (in the corner, taking up space). this is the only time i will ever acknowledge endgame ever again
7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?
i do write crossovers! in fact i am often roundly mocked by my friends for the increasingly esoteric nature of my crossovers. way back in secondary i wrote a twilight/labyrinth crossover where angela was sarah and jareth’s daughter because i had a massive crush on a girl who liked both twilight and labyrinth. however, since that has been comprehensively scrubbed from the internet, i think my craziest crossover is probably part three of ‘traced upon the skies’, already an esoteric crossover of rivers of london and hot fuzz, when i added in a crossover with the horror movie ‘the ritual’ just because i wanted rafe spall’s character to be happy
8. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
EXTREMELY rarely and only with extreme embarrassment. i will not be any more specific than that
9. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
i used to really struggle with doing this, to the point that i had over 300 comments just. lingering in my inbox unanswered. so i decided to give those up and just commit to answering them from then on, which has been working fairly well for about a year and a half now. i love getting comments but i get overwhelmed really easily and struggle with replying in a way which feels meaningful without getting in my head about it!
10. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
yes lmao it was for a harry potter fic on ff.net where harry got sorted into hufflepuff instead of gryffindor. it wasn’t a very good fic but i think the fact it was clearly written by an 11 year old should have scared off at least some of the less flattering comments.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
i don’t... think so? i don’t know how i’d find out to be honest, my vanity googling is rarely very effective
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes! as bronze may be much beautified (skyfall, mallory/bond) got translated into chinese, i was extremely pleased. i think it’s mandarin but the ao3 page for the translation doesn’t say and my mandarin is.................. extremely poor
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
also yes! me and jess little-smartass have written a lot together, although only our star trek/les mis series has been published, more’s the pity. we spent a lot of les mis fandom time workshopping aus and we were always extremely correct about all of it, imo
14. What’s your all time favourite ship to write for?
oh god. i think probably kirk/spock, although there’s some recency bias to that since i reread space manhattans recently and was reminded of my love for them. i really like writing jon/martin but i’ve mostly done that from outsider pov which is a bit different to writing shipfic, i think. joe/nicky from tog was also something i really liked writing but i struggle with plotting longer fic with them
15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
i recently went through my abandoned fic folder so i actually have a few options for this. the obvious choice would be ‘any of the hockey ones’ but i did delete most of those just for my sanity. more recently i started writing a vaguely smutty pre-the thing mac/fuchs fic for alex @milkdrinker5000 which i really WANT to finish but am struggling with. most obscure answer (even beyond the thing) and most likely to remain unfinished is the insanely in depth post-tog booker/copley fic i had planned out back in about october. i wrote a good 6-7k of that one and then i realised it was going to be, like, difficult, and decided if i was going to put that much work into something it may as well be the novel im meant to be writing
16. What are your writing strengths?
once a friend told me i had an excellent facility for dialogue and ive thought about it every time i write ever since. i love writing dialogue and i think i’m good at knowing what sounds ic and what is right out.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
one of the things i struggled with for a really long time, and honestly still have trouble with, is depicting action in words. once i wrote a hockey fic which featured multiple hockey games and i spent probably four times as much effort editing those to make sense and be interesting that i’ve ever done on a talkier scene.
18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
i’ve done it but only when i knew more or less what i was talking about - i did italian at school so i felt confident using it for nicky in something particular and real. i try not to italicise when i drop in words from other languages, which is what i usually do when i’m using a language i haven’t studied in depth (for example, joe’s use of arabic in some of my fic), and to only use words which i’ve heard used by native speakers in that context. i think if you don’t feel confident using another language, generally speaking, you shouldn’t do it. and for god’s sake don’t use google translate for a full sentence
19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
harry potter on the newsround chatboards. ariana lovegood-longbottom my sweet child
20. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?
this used to be an easy question because hands down the fic i was proudest of on posting it was i’ll be seeing you. i spent a year and a half on research and writing! but these days i do cringe a little at my hockey fic, and i think i’m prouder of some of my shorter works. let’s do a curveball and say layer on layer, down on down, which is my favourite of my rnm fics and the one i like most from a narrative voice perspective. getting michael right was stressful and i’m still proud i got it down for a TIME LOOP FIC, my absolute favourite trope
tagging @little-smartass and @leescoresbies just in case they want to try this
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So…how’s that next chapter of post hoc going?
It’s coming along. I’m 2/3rds into it. Ideally it’ll be done in a week (or so), but until then, here’s a small look at the chapter. 🙂
________________
The composed email lazes on his computer screen, so carefree and unassuming despite the threat inherent in its existence. “Just click send.”
“I am working my way to it.”
Wanda’s raised eyebrows doubt his resolve, the ring on her right index finger clinking out her impatience against his You know what gets on my nerves? Myelin mug. “Want me to do it?”
“No, because then you will see the recipient’s name.” They had established in their original IRB that he alone would have access to the names of their participants, a necessary risk since someone has to code for individual level characteristics and be able to connect the gifts with the RSVPs. Once data collection is completed and all data coded to Wanda’s liking, he will deidentify it all so she can analyze it without compromising any personal information of their participants. Given their current predicament, he even had to remove her access to the email account. Regardless of this agreed upon protocol, it has not stopped her from slyly trying to get him to slip up. “I will have the courage any moment now.”
A pointed sip of her tea actually helps, marginally, his nerves splitting between the email and her undivided attention, though one is more pleasant than the other. “Treat it like a bandaid.”
Not psychologically unsound. The fact he is cogitating so much on sending the email is itself a cognitive issue of impact bias where he presumes (wrongly) that it will be emotionally negative enough that he is now seeking to avoid it. In reality, he knows it will be much like the bandaid Wanda is suggesting. If he just sends it and then seeks out distraction or some other task, the negative emotions will not only be less intense but have a shorter duration. He just needs to trust his psychological immune system. “Very well,” he accepts this is the best path forward but he still reads the email one more time, making sure that the tone is one of sharing information and not desperation given they are informing their participant of the fact that a scheduling error has led them to move their wedding to a state park pavilion an hour away. This will not ruin their study, and even if it does harm the data, they have strategies to ameliorate the impact. The world will not end, even if his heart seems to think it will. “All right...” Vision slowly clicks the send button “here we go,” and there is no taking it back now.
“I’m proud of you.”
The hand patting his shoulder is already activating his coping mechanisms, his right leg crossing over his left as he swivels his chair to face her. “Before I stumble into the depths of rumination,” something she finds far more amusing than he does, “perhaps we can find something not related to our study to discuss.”
Whenever faced with a task, Wanda’s eyes wander in thought. He always imagines she is tracing the threads of topics and trying to find the one farthest from where he thinks she will go. “I’m beginning to suspect my work with Hank is an attempt to rekindle his failed marriage.”
“Fascinating.” Of the core group he spends time with, Vision is always the one absent any gossip. In a way this should be uplifting to his moral standing and staunchness to not belittle others, but then it leaves him in the quandary of wanting to remain aloof while also very much fascinated by what Wanda is dangling before him. Information gathering does not have to be synonymous with gossiping, as one is passive and the other active. “What makes you reach that conclusion?”
“Okay,” the mug descends onto his desk with an excited thud and Wanda leans forward, hands ready to gesticulate her way through the information, “so Janet van Dyne, his estranged wife, is one of the foremost quantum computing minds and has started doing a lot of work on quantum time travel.”
“Oh I dislike time travel.” Because the rules are never followed and the consequences are rarely sensical.
“You’ll be happy to know she hasn’t achieved it yet.”
“I am much relieved.”
Wanda scrunches her nose for a half second before continuing, “But what she has been working on is a computational model of whether the butterfly effect would actually exist in quantum time travel.”
An effect he knows she dislikes and yet she is invigorated at the thought. “To make sure I am following, you are saying that she is trying to mathematically establish whether going back in time and fiddling with the past would actually impact the future?”
Wanda nods, the sheer enjoyment she gets from the topic leading to an antsiness that shifts between turning her mug a couple degrees at a time, pushing her hair behind her ear, and varying the positioning of her legs. “So far she’s found evidence that if we view time with a quantum lens, it actually might correct itself when small changes happen and that the original timeline might remain resilient enough to outlast the change.”
“Does this not inherently contradict your own work?”
“Not entirely,” an ounce of uncertainty shoulders into her voice, “quantum chaos still exists but she seems to suggest it acts differently with competing timelines and reality could have a self-correcting mechanism.”
It all seems a bit too muddled for his ability to comprehend the difference. “What is it that you and Hank are doing that is meant to fix their personal timeline?”
“He’s been insisting on us doing a lot of different quantum walks,” she explained this to him some time ago, complete with a diagram of a quantum tree. It is all about the pathway photons travel to get from one point to another, but not linearly. All of the branches intersect and so their studies are about predicting when jumps between branches occur and how to determine movement. In his mind it is like the subway, how there are various lines that intersect at any given station and that you could take four travelers from station A and ask them to find their way to Station F. They could all take the same series of trains or switch between lines, maybe even one travels by bus or foot for a time. Most people would only ever consider the start and the end and determine the journey must be linear, even when it might not be, especially if there are delays or lines shut down. No doubt it is far more complicated than that. “I mean a lot of different ones to try and disprove her findings. I only found out because I noticed he’d been publishing commentaries to her articles and using our data as support for his arguments.”
“How precisely is challenging her work meant to win her back?”
Wanda finishes her tea but doesn’t let go of the cup, her fingers tracing the glossy raised letters, “Hoping she’s intellectually turned on by it?”
There are researchers in his own niche area that have a similar, albeit non-romantic (he presumes) dynamic of obsession to always counter each other, to always craft a study meant to disprove the theoretical underpinnings of the other’s work. It’s why conferences can get dicey when the alcohol is free flowing and debates erupt over empathy and selfishness and how to delineate the two movitations. “I cannot speak for Janet, but it seems a bit more depressing than romantic.”
“At least it’s distracting him from his ant obses—-“ The tell tale chime of their study’s email disrupts her, “What do you think we got this time?”
“Let’s see,” he switches to the tab and in place of the usual notification from their wedding website there is an email sitting there with the sender as Tony Stark. Physiologically his heart remains firmly in his chest, but figuratively it plummets through the floor, “It is from our participant.”
In the time it takes for the comment to be processed and her, “That participant?” Vision has already read the response twice, his eyes going back for a third read through to make sure he has not found himself in some alternative universe created by his neurons firing too quickly.
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