#that little ginger freak is going to do it for me lol

[emilyyouredrivingmecrazy]

Going to see Gladiator ii on Saturday and I can already tell you I'm going to have inappropriate thoughts about Emperor Geta

[makingshortstorieslong]

ouch m.y tummy

[whimsiwitchy]

I hear the secrets that you keep (series) 

chapter six: 24

Pedro Pascal x plus size F!reader 

series masterlist

series summary: 24 year old y/n is an insecure and struggling actress in Los Angeles until she finally books a leading role in a big Hollywood movie next to her leading male, Pedro Pascal. A spark of friendship flickers between the two and slowly begins to blossom into something more. As y/n is navigating a new found fame and a new found romance, she fears that a lie she has been sitting on might ruin everything.

Warnings: plus size afab reader, she/her pronouns, use of y/n, swearing, age gap (24/14 years), descriptions of the female body, use of the word fat, descriptions of a bigger body (stretch marks, cellulite, rolls, etc.), descriptions of nudity, sexual themes. 

Please let me know if I missed anything! Warnings may change as the story progresses. 

chapter summary: y/n tells Pedro the truth. 

authors note: Hi everyone! This chapter is a little rough, but it's done lol. Also, what do you guys think about the length of the chapters? Do you want them longer, shorter, the same length? Let me know! I believe they're average 1.5-2k words as of now. Enjoy! :)

╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗ 

“BITCH, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!” 

You had spent the last thirty minutes catching Angie up on the newest details of your escapades with Pedro and all of your doubts that came with it. It has become really common for Angie and yourself to go weeks without seeing each other, only sending each other texts here and there or the two of you discussing work stuff when necessary. When both of your busy schedules finally aligned, the two of you immediately set up a ‘catch up and gossip’ sesh on your living room couch. 

“Please stop yelling. I’m one noise complaint away from being evicted because of you.” You sigh only half joking. 

“Sorry sorry. I’m just… okay wait let me gather my thoughts for a moment.” She takes a sip of her iced coffee and she's staring just past your head at the wall behind you. Your leg is bouncing at a record breaking pace. You told her everything, not skipping a single detail, and you were hoping whatever came out of Angie’s mouth next was positive. You weren’t exactly sure why you were so nervous to hear what she was going to say. Maybe you wanted some confirmation that what had been happening between you and Pedro wasn’t crazy, that you weren’t in over your head. 

Angie had always been better at relationships than you and understandably so. She was naturally beautiful, it baffled you how someone could even be born so blessed. She was about 5’4, with ginger hair that went down just past the middle of her back. She has this perfectly white smile that hid behind her perfectly plump lips with light freckles scattered along her cheeks and shoulders. Her loud and outgoing personality just solidified just how easily likable she was. You used to envy her but she was never competing with you. She was the kindest soul you had ever met and she stood beside you always. You knew whatever she said was probably what was best for you. She was the definition of a girl's girl. 

“Okay okay... so you’re telling me that he came to see you on his day off, the two of you messed around in your trailer, he asked you to come over, and the two of you didn’t fuck?” She says as she finally snaps back into reality. 

“Angie oh my fucking god… how many times do I have to tell you that we didn’t have sex.” You’re starting to feel hopeless. You had asked her for advice and shes done nothing but annoyingly ask if you and Pedro had fucked since the moment you mentioned that the two of you basically dry humped each other for a good five minutes in your trailer.  

“Can you please be serious for five minutes and actually help me? I’m freaking the fuck out. Everytime I’m with him all of the worrying goes away but once I’m alone it hits me like a fucking truck.” You’re begging her at this point to put her dating expertise to use. 

“Okay fine, I’m sorry.” She says sincerely and you let out a faint thank you. 

“So he said something about wanting to take you out?” 

“Yea, um, he mentioned it when he was asking me if I wanted to stay over. It wasn’t anything set in stone but he did mention like dating and stuff so I don't know…” You trail off, really unsure of everything. 

“I think you’re overthinking it babe. If he didn’t fuck you, he definitely respects you and wants to have something more with you, ya know?” 

“You think so?” 

“I know so. He’s a good one y/n, I can feel it in my bones.” You give her a small smile. 

“You should totally introduce me to him though so I can really double down on him.” She grabs your hands from your lap and looks you in the eyes. 

“It’s all going to be okay, okay? In the end, he's just a man y/n. Besides, we can jump his ass if he plays you.” She squeezes your hands and gives you a tough nod. 

“But that’s the thing Ang, he’s not just a man. He’s my older, insanely hot co-star, who still doesn’t even know just how young I am.” You huff and shove your face into your hands. 

“Y/n, you haven’t told him?” She’s giving you a look you’re not familiar with. 

“No��I tried but work stuff interrupted me and that was before he kissed me” 

“Hm… well I think you should for sure tell him sooner rather than later, but don’t worry about it too much, yea? I’m sure he’ll be fine with it.” 

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ─── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ─

“OH fucking shit, fuck fuck fuck…HOLY SHIT..” 

Swears were flying from your mouth left and right as the wax lady ripped more and more wax off of you taking each hair follicle with it. With your intimacy training coming up soon, you had to prepare by being silky smooth on all body parts that have a chance of being on camera- which was basically your entire body for this shoot. You’ve been through this same process many times before but something about this felt different. You knew that this project was bigger than anything you had ever done before but somehow you being naked on camera for millions to see wasn’t your biggest fear right now. 

Once your appointment was over and there wasn’t a hair left on your body, you were speed walking home. For some reason you always convince yourself to walk to the wax studio due to the close proximity to your apartment, but you always regretted it once your skin was begging for some sort of soothing distraction from the pain. Even with the loose fit of the skirt you were wearing, commando at that, you could still feel the irritation growing stronger. Your thighs were beginning to rub together in a way in which you knew you'd have to slather vaseline between your legs just to prevent any further chafing. 

After your long ass hike (a ten minute walk) through the depths of hell (it was 80 degrees with a breeze), you finally made it home. You walked straight into your bathroom, stripped, and hopped into a cold shower. You scrubbed your body with a vanilla and coconut body wash, being extra careful when you got closer to your fresh brazilian wax, and washed your hair. When you finished showering, you lotioned up, dried your hair, and laid down in your bed to relax. 

You planned on bedrotting and watching tik tok for the rest of the day but you couldn’t shake the thought of what Angie had told you earlier today. 

Sooner rather than later…

*hey! I was wondering if you’d want to hang out sometime soon? :) 

You sent the text and threw your phone across your bed. It’s been a few days since you slept over at his house. After you agreed to stay, he offered the guest room, but with all of your courage -mostly sleepiness,  you asked to sleep with him. The next morning you were wrapped in his arms, soft snores in your ear. His hand was holding yours and you laid there memorizing each crinkle of his knuckles, staring at the tattoo that sat between the webbing of his thumb and index finger. You kept trying to imagine how he looked when he was sleeping, wondering if he had a peaceful look to him or if the wrinkles in his face relaxed. Not being able to hold off any longer, you turned over so your mind wouldn’t have to imagine anymore. You were right. He looked like the definition of peace. His hair was a mess, his mouth ajar, eyelashes resting beautifully on the underneath of his eyes. Pedro was the most handsome man you had ever seen, you were sure that you could have fallen in love with him right then and there. 

Pedro:

*Hey baby. I’m done filming around 9 tonight. I can come pick you up and we can grab some food. 

*Sound good? 

You:

*sounds good. see you later <3

Another late night with Pedro. You’d unconsciously have been reserving nights just for him. When the sun was up, you worked, saw friends, handled whatever business that needed to be dealt with, but the night was strictly for him. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was purposeful or completely accidental that the two of you seemed to meet when the moon was out. The next few hours leading up to seeing Pedro would be hell, you were certain of it. Knowing that everything that has built over such a short time period could be washed away and you would have to awkwardly deal with him on set, somehow ignoring the strong feelings that you were beginning to hold for him. You were really hoping that Angie was right. That he would somehow be totally cool with the whole 24 year age gap thing, but you knew deep down that just wasn’t likely. 

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ─── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ─

It was 9:30 and you were pacing around your living room waiting for any sign of Pedro. You’ve been anxious all evening and now that the time to see him has come, you weren’t ready at all. A soft knock on your door makes you come to a halt. Walking over to the door, you peer through the peephole to see Pedro- who looks so good it makes your jaw drop. You took a few deep breaths before opening the door. 

“Hey sweetheart.” He greets, smile beaming. You open the door wider, allowing him to step inside. 

“Hi..” Your voice comes out softer than you intended, anxiety seeping through your body. “Uh, let me just grab some shoes and my bag then we can head out.” You walk towards a small coat closet to grab your checkered vans. “You can take a seat if you want, I'll be right back.” He gave you a nod and walked over to the papasan chair that sits in the far corner of your living room. Meanwhile, you were in your room freaking out. Seeing him was a hard slap in the face. You knew you had to tell him tonight before feelings developed and someone got hurt, but who's to say that won’t already happen tonight. 

You felt like shit and you definitely looked it. Grabbing a small purse, you spray some perfume on and make your way back to the living room. 

“Ready to go?” You ask, putting on a small smile, hoping Pedro couldn’t see through it. He returns the smile and stands up. The two of you make your way to his car, stopping once outside to lock your door. 

“So, what’re you hungry for?” Pedro asks while putting his seat belt on, you do the same. 

“Whatever is fine with me, I'm not too picky.” 

You ended up grabbing some mcdonalds and parking in some random parking lot to eat and talk. He was being so sweet to you, complimenting you every few minutes, a smile never leaving his face. He was truly your dream guy, he was everything you could ever want. You were terrified that you were going to lose it all. You hadn’t been completely yourself all night and Pedro was starting to catch on. 

“You okay baby? You seem a little off.” He’s looking at you, eyes filled with concern. You don’t answer him right away. You’re trying to find the best way to go about telling him. You were 24 but you were an adult and you hated that this age gap was such a big deal. You had never been into the idea of dating an older man but then Pedro came around and changed everything. For you, it wasn’t a life changing idea, but for Pedro, it could very well be career ending. If he was seen with you and people found out just how young you were compared to him. This whole relationship, or whatever it is, was doomed from the start. Your leg is bouncing, a regular occurrence around Pedro it seems. 

“P…I need to tell you something.” You’re looking down at your hands, unable to look him in his eyes. 

“What is it sweet girl? You can tell me anything.” His voice is filled with nothing but sincerity and you can physically feel pain from your heart slowly breaking. 

“I’m not actually 35…” You’re still not looking at him, silence fills the air. You’re waiting for him to say something but he never does. You look up and his expression is unreadable. 

“Okay…How old are you then?” From the sound of his voice, you can tell that he is confused. 

“I’m 24.” You’re looking in his eyes searching for any rapid change of emotion. Your leg is still rapidly bouncing, heart pounding. 

“What?” 

“I’m 24, well i’ll be 25 soon but yea…” 

“Jesus fucking christ y/n…” He’s shaking his head and running his hand over the slight stubble coming in on his chin. 

“Are you mad at me?” You ask. You sounded so pathetic right now, but it’s all you could muster up. 

“I’m not mad.” He’s staring at you. Relief flows through your body and you start to relax. 

“Why did you lie to me?” His voice is raised slightly causing you to wince slightly. 

“I didn’t mean to lie to you P, I swear. My um…my agent, Angie, lied about my age to book the audition. It wasn’t something I did intentionally, well it wasn’t something I did at all.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” A look of hurt present on his face. 

“I just never thought to bring it up. I mean we were just hanging out then you kissed me and everything changed. I tried to tell you at the skating rink but we had to head to the floor and I swear I've been trying to find a way to tell you but I was so scared to ruin whatever we have going on here. I really like you pedro…”  

“I really like you too y/n, but you’re so fucking young. I mean I’m about to be 50, I can’t be screwing around with a 24 year old.” 

Your heart drops. You can feel the tears starting to well up before a few fall against your will. 

“I’m sorry.” You're looking down again, trying to hide your tears from Pedro. 

“I should get you home.” He sighs and starts the car. 

The drive back to your apartment was quick but painfully awkward. You faced the window the entire time, letting your tears fall freely. When he pulled into the parking lot, the two of you sat in silence for a few minutes. You were afraid to leave the car, afraid that this might be the last time you get to be with him outside of work. 

“What does this mean for us?” You whisper, turning to look at him. He has his right hand still sitting on the steering wheel, while his left hand is sitting on his thigh, fingers tapping. 

“I don’t know y/n.” He’s still not looking at you, face staring out the front windshield. 

y/n.  No baby, no sweetheart or sweet girl, just your name. 

“Okay. Well um… thanks for dinner. I’ll see you on set.” Your voice betrays you, cracking on your last words towards him. He gives you a slight nod. You get out of the car and make your way to your apartment. Once inside, you kicked off your shoes and walked slowly to your room. Collapsing onto the bed, you let out a sob, all of the emotions you had been holding in finally being let free. You felt heart broken. For once you had the perfect man who saw past your weight, thought you were beautiful, and enjoyed your time. But it didn’t matter now. It was all ruined because of some stupid lie to get an audition for some stupid movie that has a stupid fucking title. You were starting to feel more angry than sad. Angry that you had even got the part in the first place, angry that Pedro asked you to hang out with him, angry that he had kissed you. If the two of you could have been professional and just be costars, your heart wouldn’t be breaking into a million pieces. Life was so fucking unfair. 

╚══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╝ 

series tag list: @nuetralcolorsenthusiast, @kungfucapslock, @hansilandgretel, @ashleyfilm, @titabel, @fifitheragertot

*If you wish to be added to the tag list, leave a comment on this post letting me know! <3

[valfeathers]

I would love your headcanons for all of the Wammy boys.

ok!! finally got around to it! sorry abt the wait lol

ok so i’m going to condense these & limit myself for now,, but anyways here’s a little something abt each of the boys

there's more art at the very bottom of this text btw :)

(consulting my wammy boy google doc)

A -

he was the in-house music/pop culture expert. if you needed a music recommendation you could go to him and he'd definitely find you something.

he was a master violinist, but after being scouted for wammy's he set his sights on the guitar and spent years learning how to play. his fingers were pretty much always calloused because he kept losing his picks.

he never lost his irish accent.

B -

he was the reigning king of pranks. never turn your back on him, i mean it, he will hotwire your car to roll down a hill (true story, ask roger)

the thing that set him apart at wammy's the most was the fact that he would just. get the mop out. sometimes. it wasn't unusual to spot him cleaning something unprompted. clean freak b? clean freak b.

after A died, he didn't stay long. he couldn't stand to be under the same roof as L, and for the short while he was still in the house he moved around like a ghost, seething with just. grief and anger. he left without a word, or a note, or any sort of message at all.

L- (for everybody's sake i'll keep this one short)

he's been to his fair share of concerts, shows etc (i'm an 'L actually went out in public' truther till i die)

as teens, A & B helped him deck out his padded cell with posters etc to liven it up, and he never took them down. over time he converted it into a ragtag office

he and roger are not friends. far from it. they so do not get along. L still calls him 'codger' occasionally and roger gets reminded of B every single time.

Matt-

he cuts & dyes his own hair, and he definitely got into stick n pokes (+ bonus: the first time he bleached his hair, he had mello help him & the two geniuses forgot to use toner, so he wound up ginger. everything worked out, though, because he wanted to dye his hair red anyways)

he used to creep downstairs at ungodly hours and raid the newly stocked dining hall for cereal. he has run into L multiple times doing this.

he gives me 'broke his arm as a kid and had to wear a cast' vibes. i can't explain it, that hc just calls to me.

Mello-

like L, he got into his fair share of scraps as a kid. they've bonded over that. (+bonus: he has bitten someone before)

he was fiercely protective of matt & near when he was younger in an 'only i can bully them' kind of way that is so common with siblings.

labb gives me an excuse to imagine him as a big reader so that's what i'm doing! he read the classics as a kid & he wrote in his off time too,, he has dozens of journals that will never see the light of day.

Near-

he arrived at wammy's very young, he was actually the youngest wammy alumni on record.

i haven't gotten the opportunity to draw him with it yet, but i hc him as a cane user! a cane that linda customized for him at L's request. (from now on i Will include it in all of my near art istg)

out of the successor trio, he's the only person who was around when A was alive. he has one vague memory of A, that being A giving him a tiny wordless wave.

thank youu thankyouthankyou if you made it this far omg!! this took me a while but it was fun! have some domestic-y family-y wammy boy art to rest ur eyes after that little novella

[aylinhadtimeforthis]

Dead Poets Society As Dogs

so I'd come up with this concept a long while ago but decided to post it here bc why not so here goes lol

Neil: Brown Golden Retriever

I really tried going off their colour, size, shape language, vibes and personality and all that, and Neil DEFFO has golden retriever energy but the darker colour helps him contrast with Todd and also is in reference to his life and looks more

Todd: Cream Labrador

Honestly I don't know what other dog to have put for Todd this is the best fit I think He is calm and chill like labs but also wouldn't hesitate to defend his friends and stand his ground :)

Chris: Samoyed

I really didn't wanna put Chris as a light (esp white) coloured dog bc of her connotations with light colours but 😭 It literally fits so well hskdhbfjhds she looks so pretty I couldn't not do it :") and also there's not many darker dogs that fit her vibe :( She can still accessorize in darker colours tho ofc ofc

Ginny: Blue Heeler

Nah C'MON this is SUCH a Ginny dog like the bluish blackish warmish greyish patterns on the fur is like exactly what I think she'd wear and the dark round patterns are reminiscent to her dark wavy hair :)

Dalton: Husky-Chi

This was the only one that made a little sense to me tbh 😭 I literally tried looking for so many types of small dogs but they all looked weird and unfitting and wrong so this is the best I got 💀 Also apparently their personalities are quite unpredictable and "mystic" which I think matches pretty well with her impulsive and creative sense

Knox: German Shepherd Hound Mix

This is such a Knox dog omg look at him he's got the same cowardly mopey doe eyed look the lil freak always has I love him I esp wanted a dog that would be of a bigger build but more quiet and kinda scared looking like Knox is, and I think it worked p well with the hound addition bc german shepherds are guard and fighting dogs and the mix totally subverting that threatening appearance fits pretty well with Knox's lack of interest in getting involved with trouble or scuffs Also he looks like he'd give good hugs which :))))))

Pitts: Husky

THAT IS LITERALLY A PITTS DOG C'MON LOOK AT MY BOY THAT IS HIM I LOVE HIM

Meeks: Orange Poodle

Meeks would always accompany you and chill out with you but also judge you to the ends of hell and back and I feel like this is the right dog to convey that through Also it has his curly ginger hair :)

Cameron: Finnish Spitz

Who's a good pretty little bitch boy? You are yeah. Now THAT'S a Cameron dog if I've ever seen one istg it's got the colour the cut the expressions and everything- also there's this title of an article I found hsjkhsdjhfbjt-

-So true bestie too much crazy Cameron barking can be hazardous to your health anyway I hope you enjoyed this silly species-bend post or whatever one'd call it lol I just thought it'd be interesting to make :)

[baskettt]

lol that one post i just reblogged really does have me thinking about the mischaracterization of ajax as a whole. a lot of people (even me at some point) fucked him up so bad as this player-cheater-fuckboy(?) kind of dude, but he’s really not.

like he’ll fall in love with one person and freak the fuck out about it. he’s not a romantic until BOOM that one person. and he doesn’t know how to handle it because he’s a fucking dumbass. like yeah he has this outwardly confident guise and on the inside he’s sort of edgy, which i feel makes people lump him in to the “bad boy” stereotype. ajax isn’t looking to fuck and kiss and shit he’s trying to conquer the world lmao….

idk how to describe it. he cares about very few things (basically just his family and getting stronger) which should be a telltale sign that maybe hes not some player… like he’s heartless (i fucking love morally grey characters can you tell) but he’s not heartless because he doesn’t know how the fuck actual romance works. and because he loves his family dearly. he just does what he needs to do to satisfy himself (if you know what i mean) and is done. bro crawled out of the abyss and some people think he has rizz HELP……… he’s too mentally ill+silly to be some hardass

he’s the smartest dumbest ginger i’ve ever goddamn seen!!!!! and i think he deserves a little more credit than he fucked bitches and gets hoes (he’s pathetic no he doesn’t) (i mean yeah maybe bitches wanna fuck but i don’t really think he does) anyways that’s just my opinion and i wish i could elaborate further but i think i’d just go on forever. meow meow tangents are not collected coherent thoughts

[httpsserene]

trust me. Your opinions are anything but terrible.

Arizona: GREEN TEA IS THE RIGHT ANSWER. If I could have one drink on a deserted island I would have that. Iced tea with lemon is also the right take and so is sweet tea and I’m saying that as someone from New York. My little 5 cents is try the peach. I personally like it and drink it if the bodega by me is out of green tea.

Ice cream: once again. THE CORRECT ANSWERS. I’m a sucker for vanilla tbh. Like vanilla in general is just MMM idk. I like the smell of it too like straight vanilla extract. I personally also like ginger it’s really really good. It’s hard to find ginger ice cream here too. The place that used to have it took it off their menu a few years ago now. Oreo has to be three for me just bc of Ginger.

Gum: trust me. I agree with you there. I never understand it. Mints are also one of my favorites, or those tic tacs those are delicious. Mints are making me think of those peppermint you would get from the front office or the nurse in high school. Istg they put something in that it went so hard.

chocolate: is just- amazing trust me. I completely consider chocolate with caramel chocolate because it has chocolate in it sooooo. Then again I eat chocolate covered potato chips (it tastes amazing trust me, it’s from Japan it’s so good.) KitKats and M&Ms are up there for me. What’s your favorite flavor of them or do you just like the OG? For me KitKats the og is the goat. M&Ms I lowkey like the brownie one. That or the caramel one.

Ok. I haven’t seen a lollipop that wasn’t dumdums in a hot second and I don’t want that to change. Once again, butterscotch is the correct answer! It’s defo my favorite, second is the blue raspberry and third is root beer. I also really like trying to figure out the hidden flavors.

My next set of questions. 1: On a deserted island, what are three things you would bring with you that isn’t ur phone.

2: if you could only eat one thing what would it be. (My answer to this is sushi bc there are so many different types I would never get bored.)

3: what is your favorite food/comfort food?

4: what seat on the plane do you prefer? 5: What do you think is the silliest word in English?

6: do you have any hot takes on movies/shows?

7: besides writing, what’s a talent that you have?

8: what’s something that feels illegal, but isn’t?

9: what's just a random fun fact you have

10: if you could have a superpower, what would it be?

11: what’s the weirdest thing you believed as a kid? (Mine was that if the lights in the backseat were on, the car wouldn’t start.)

And last but not least

12: do you have a trend you want to end? Along with that is there a specific word that you wish wouldn’t exist anymore?

I’m so sorry I realize now how long this is. Pls you don’t have to answer all of these I promise!

✧*̣̩⋆̩☽⋆゜ og kitkats and m&ms for life!

i would bring a plane, fuel, and a pilot LMAO

a rice bowl, like you can't go wrong! my particular bowl: white rice, black beans, steak, veggies, lettuce, cheese, salsa, sour cream, and queso blanco (i like dairy even though i'm lactose intolerant)

favorite/comfort food? i actually don't know if i have one? but like junk food/snack wise i really like nacho cheese doritos and chocolate chip cookies, separately of course, never both at the same time lol

aisle seat for logistics but window seat is the true answer. i have to look out of the window for takeoff and landing or else i may freak out a tiny bit.

wouldn't the silliest word be "silliest?" jk i think it's either "queue" or "definitely." queue has too many letters for how it sounds, that's why in america we say "line" instead! and, definitely, i mean cmon bro, it's silly that i always spell it wrong on my first attempt.

hot takes: all the shows with a highschool setting could've been college/university shows; what is the obsession with having minors (played by adults) in explicit shows (not that underage kids don't experience sexual stuff, it just shouldn't be that prominent in media i feel it sends the wrong message to ACTUAL minors irl. another hot take: not every book or cartoon needs a live action adaptation. please stop mutilating something that was perfect.

i'm happy you think i'm a talented writer haha but, my little talentthat i always tell everbody is that i'm musically gifted. i played the violin for 12+ years, did a little bit on the drums, but right now i'm jamming on a bass guitar!

TSA. i always feel like i'm smuggling something in my luggage even though i'm not. Electronic signatures too, that shit is not valid, imo! but it would pain me to have to be in person to sign a contract as an introvert.

microbursts, their bursts of air from thunderstorms, and if you ever have the chance to be in small/private plane at a certain altitude and hit one, you'd be pulverized instantly. turbulence is also a rare reason for planes to crash (i've memorized this from spencer reid in a criminal minds epsiode, idk why)

charm speak, a little like mind control but just through speech! piper from pjo and allison from umbrella academy both have a type of charm speak if you're familiar with those examples.

the weirdest thing i believed is that carrots keep your vision perfect. i loved carrots as a kid and i still almost turned out to be nearly as blind as a bat. swear i'm a few points away from being legally blind and learning echolocation.

the trend i'd end? beauty standards for sure, whether it's body types or face structures gts gone. as for the word i'd get rid of? any slur would be thrown in the trash promptly!

it was a fun q&a, i don't really mind it! ✧*̣̩⋆̩☽⋆゜

[coffeebanana]

15 Questions 15 Mutuals

Thanks for the tag @ladyofthenoodle and @kasienda

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, although my middle name is a family name.

2. When was the last time you cried?

I think a few weeks ago? I watched "Everything, Everywhere, All at Once" and KJBSDFKBJD. Like that movie is such a fun mix of WTF is even going on craziness and contemplating the point of existence and exploring complicated family feelings and the end is weirdly heartwarming--particularly the interactions between the mother and daughter, which is what really got me. And I was watching with one of my best friends and like right after the movie ended he was like "if we were rocks you'd be the googly eyes"--which makes no sense if you haven't seen the movie but that made me cry again because kajdfbksjbf it was so oddly sweet. (Though that was a mixture of hysterical laughter and crying ajsdjfsvjhv in a good way though!)

3. Do you have kids?

nope. maybe one day if i ever get my life together LOL

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

idk if it's a lot?? though i'm probably single-handedly responsible for teaching my brother sarcasm (he's 7 years younger than me so when he was learning would have been right as i was entering those peak sarcasm years LOL)

sarcasm is still deeply engrained in me though, and i nowadays when i use it i definitely pay more attention to how people react to it (ie whether they picked up on it) because i tend to deliver it in a very matter-of-fact voice. like, one of my favourite stupid sarcastic comments to make is whenever something weird weather-wise happens i'll be "but thank god climate change is fake, right?" and KJABFDKSJBD i've gotten some WEIRD LOOKS saying that one around ppl who don't know me that well and then i have to explain myself 😭

5. What sports do you play/have played?

i used to figure skate!! my mom was a coach when i was growing up, so i would joke that i lived part-time at the ice rink. it was kind of inevitable 😂. but i was never good at the jumps. i prefered ice dance or synchronized skating (think synchronized swimming but on the ice)

and i also used to play hockey!? very different environment LOL and my hockey teammates would sometimes tease me for showing up to a game in a dress after skating practice on days i had both but it was all in good fun

now...now i really SHOULD do something kajsdkbfsj

6. What’s the first thing you notice about someone?

i...really have no idea.

7. What’s your eye color?

hazel? i think?

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

happy endings. scary movies don't really freak me out but i guess i just find them sort of...low-reward? i'm not a movie person to begin with because it's hard for me to get invested in the characters in such a short amount of time. with horror movies that's even harder because they're all about shock value instead of getting to know the characters

9. Any special talents?

i am very very good at puns. does that count? 😂

10. Where were you born?

canada. on the west coast

11. What are your hobbies?

when i have energy/motivation i really enjoy cooking (or baking, but with baking i have to actually measure ingredients and with cooking i just sort of go with the flow). my new apartment is going to have space for a dishwasher--which really is the most exciting thing in my life right now--so i'm hoping that motivates me to cook more!!

12. Do you have pets?

yes!!! i have a ginger cat and her name is Curie (namesake Marie Curie because i'm a proud little nerd like that). I love her she's so stupid and has tried to eat plastic TOO MANY TIMES but every morning and night she will curl up on my chest when i'm in bed and she's just a precious bean

13. How tall are you?

5'5.5 (166cm). but i would have been taller if my spine had known how to grow straight 😔

14. Favorite subject in school?

science!! i had the same science teacher in high school from grades 8-10 (aka the only teacher in the french immersion department who was really qualified to teach it 😂) and i ADORED HER. from day one i was hooked--like she even made syllabus day fun. so i owe my love of science in part to her, really.

in university i realized i liked chemistry best amongst the sciences, so that was my major. and my favourite class i ever took was intro to quantum chemistry (which is really just quantum physics but the math was geared more towards what us chemistry students were familiar with)

15. Dream job?

okay, avoiding the typical "i do not dream of labour" answer...i really don't know. which is a problem. like i genuinely have no idea what i could do long-term that would actually make me happy and i just hope i figure it out at some point akjsdkfsjbd ... I feel like I was not supposed to leave paragraph responses for some of these but akjfkdsjbgd i can admit i like to talk about myself, okay? Anyways! I think I can find 15 mutuals who as far as i know haven't been tagged yet.

@ck2k18, @wackus-bonkus-maximus, @redundant-lava, @maridotnet, @celestialtitania, @talkstoself, @saiikavon, @sunfoxfic, @rosiesared, @mexicancat-girl, @tiredfloridianbutverygay, @fortuna-et-cataclysmos, @zenniaphoenix, @eggothemusicalwaffle, @bocadelicate

[aclosetfan]

Am I the only one who tunes out automatically whenever people describe the puffs and (especially) the ruffs as super sexy and attractive in a fic or is that just me. No, the Ruffs wouldn't look like Adonis they're little slimy shitheads. The Puffs would handle themselves a bit better but they would not look like supermodels to me. If you're gonna retcon them being bug eyed freaks in your story don't make them all like supermodels it's so boring.

Honestly one of the reasons I think people do it is because they're afraid to write smut or at least more intense romantic scenes with them as weirdo puffs. "Her nubs stroked his face as they made out" sounds fucking ridiculous. God knows how ridiculous smut with them still looking like aged up puffs/ruffs is (I've never actually seen anybody brave enough to write it though).

LMAO 🤣

this is gold! I agree about the smut stuff 100%

But yeah I just ignore it. I find it frustrating in any sort of media when everyone is insanely beautiful. It’s boring to me and I like peoples “imperfections” too much to not include them. An interesting character is made up by their “flaws” and I think that extends to how they look too.

Everyone’s different, but I personally like to make Bubbles plus-sized/chubby/fat/whatever term you prefer with bad vision, Blossom with acne, Buttercup with a bad knee/limp (which is why she prefers to float), Brick a ginger mess lmao who’s scrawny as hell, and Butch with fucked up teeth. Boomer is my conventional beauty, but I make his personality wild enough that he’s a candy coated snake lol

Body-wise, I try to imply the girls have more athletic builds! And I make the greens the tallest which I know some ppl hate lolol

Depending on the story their features vary, but beyond what I wrote above, I try not to interfere with peoples idea of what the kids look. If ppl want them to be “puff” versions of the character I try not to mess with that! Admittedly, it’s hard, but I’ve seen some authors do it flawlessly. Everyone going into a fic has their own idea of what these characters look like, so no matter what you write, 9/10 ppl are going to replace ur version with theirs anyway 🤷‍♀️

[canonicallyanxious]

2022 top 10 lists

my favorite end of year tradition is making lists and trying so hard to remember literally anything i've put into my ears and eyeballs

top 10 discovered songs

note: not all 2022 releases, though a lot are

The Last Goodbye feat. Bettye LaVette - ODESZA (aka the most song of all time)

Nobody Speak feat. Run The Jewels - DJ Shadow (shoutout to my irl best friend for showing me this tour de force of a music video. this song was my top spotify track of the year also go figure)

Dynasties & Dystopia - Denzel Curry, Gizzle, Bren Joy (truly the entire Arcane soundtrack slaps from start to finish)

Dance Now - JID, Kenny Mason (really challenging to pick only one track from JID's album for this list ftr, runner ups for me include Kody Blu 31 and Better Days)

Freaks - ATARASHII GAKKO!! & Warren Hue

Violence - POLIÇA

Running Back To You feat. RebMoe - Holiday87

Star Walkin' - Lil Nas X (TWO league of legends songs on this list???!?!??!?!?! unfortunately LoL does make absolute bangin tracks and that is not my fault)

Pretend feat. Kota the Friend - pluko

Better Days - Mr Little Jeans (at least one song called Better Days made this list I guess lol)

top 10 albums

note: as per tradition these are all 2022 releases babey! also REALLY challenging to narrow down this list, quite a few i had to cut, so this list is entirely based on personal preference - could have gone differently if i'd gone for a best albums list rather than sarah's favorite albums list

The Last Goodbye - ODESZA (congrats to ODESZA for topping both of my music lists this year, honestly a difficult feat)

Forever Story - JID (if this list was based on what I think were objectively the best albums of the year I think this one would probably top the list, just an immaculate record from start to finish)

Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers - Kendrick Lamar

Laurel Hell - Mitski

Hold the Girl - Rina Sawayama

The Family - Brockhampton (honestly crazy that i listed a BH album this far down on the list this year but since it was a fairly late release i had a lot less time to get attached to it, also imo BH's best albums ever are Ginger and Roadrunner so really hard to follow up on those but i still think this and TM are killer records)

Brighter Future 2 - Big Gigantic

Hideous - Oliver Sim

<COPINGMECHANISM> - WILLOW

NO THANK YOU - Little Simz (a bit of a last-minute addition to the list, big rip to Superorganism whose "World Wide Pop" would have taken this last spot if Little Simz had not dropped absolute fire like three weeks before the end of the year)

top 10 movies/shows

Everything Everywhere All At Once dir. Daniel Kwan & Daniel Scheinert

Everything Everywhere All At Once dir. Daniel Kwan & Daniel Scheinert

Everything Everywhere All At Once dir. Daniel Kwan & Daniel Scheinert (i watched this movie three times this year don't @ me)

Arcane: Season 1 (I believe this is the only item on this list that isn't a 2022 release)

Dimension 20: A Starstruck Odyssey

Dimension 20: A Court of Fey and Flowers (am i allowed to put two seasons from the same show on this list? well i listed eeaao three times so i do whatever i want sorry about it)

Fire Island dir. Andrew Ahn

Our Flag Means Death: Season 1

What We Do in the Shadows: Season 4

Luca dir. Enrico Casarosa (never mind this is the other item on this list that isn't a 2022 release)

[pitbullwithaship]

DOCTOR WHO LIVEBLOG S5 EP1

I GOT A NEW TV and now it's time for a new doctor yay!

The picture quality on this new TV is freaking aMAZING holy hell just gotta say that

That's a violent beginning

The Tardis doesn't seem all that happy right now

Ooh wow new intro the vortex looks different that's weird

And the words too that is mildly jarring

Ooh nice garden I love it

Hello little girl who I am assuming is Amy Pond

She's adorable

Voices are never good

I love how she's praying to santa

Or a doctor

Wow I've already got eleven thoughts in in the first few seconds of the episode wow

Hello doctor

A swimming pool in the Library

Let him cook

How did they find a little girl that looks so much like Karen Gillan

Nice manners my dude

Spends hours trying to find something he likes to eat (Me when I get sick of my safe foods)

That's disgusting dude

Amelia Pond is a very nice name

Ah yes the crack

Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey

Thanks for the reassurance

Unless

No x100

Awww he's so sweet

OPEN DOOR HELLO

Spooky

Somebody is IN THE HOUSE

Oof head trauma

Okay if I know my Lore that I should not already know then this is Rory

Ooh weird

Yeah do not open the door

Ew gross blue eel thing

Okay person and dog (dog person dude)

Oh wow it's copying thw coma people

That's terrifying

WOT WOT WOT lol

Twelve years and four psychiatrists lol

Human residence is the earth

Oh gurl

I'm the doctor I'm worse than everybody's aunt

Gay

Lol cartoons?

DuCK

That's weird and I Hate that noise a lot it's hurting my brain

Life. Changed. Ooh we even got a sun flare going

Chaos

The good looking one lol

Lol get a girlfriend

Gay

Firetruck!

That's very very creepy

Zeros

Yeah please don't say that again

Creepy eel thingy

Tweety birds

He walks weird

Amy just keeps looking

Oh hey I've seen this clip

Past doctors!

Love the amazing pov view of David tennants face

Basically, run (that's his catchphrase through every life)

Wunderbar

Oh it looks so shiny and new!

Dude, don't just leave again without a word!

Aww poor Amy

He came back!?

Bow ties are decent but I wouldn't call them cool

Oops indeed

SNAP AND OPEN

Ooh warm toned lightening very fireplace very ginger hair

Not amazing I still prefer the old one but this will do

New Tardis New Screwdriver New Doctor amazing

He is a madman with a box

Yay

THATS A WEDDING DRESS GIRLIE HELLO

That was great, however I have some fanfiction to get back to so y'all don't get another part today. Or tomorrow. Probably Fridays the word.

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

Dunno if you're still doing the weird asks but:

1, 3, 6, 11, 38, 45, 50

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

Ghostbur Ghostbur and Ghostbur! The most comfort character in the whole wide world <3

Watching through Ghostbur animatics, streams, or listening to playlists about him pretty much never fails to make me feel better :) And of course, going on a Ghostbur reblog spree is probably the most enjoyable part of tumblr for me lol

do you leave the window open at night?

Nope! I used to do that occasionally, back at the house I used to live in; but now I no longer have a window near my bed, so what’s the point? XD The best part about having a window open is having your face right up to it, so you can feel the air and hear the nature sounds :)

why did you do that?

Why am I on tumblr when I could be putting away laundry? The answer is simple: I was in the mood to answer asks.

I will put away the laundry later 😔

favorite extracurricular activity?

Not exactly sure what counts here, so it’d be either writing fanfic, listening to music, or playing guitar/uke :D

a soap bar that smells good?

I honestly don’t usually pay attention to smells :0 That being said, my nana has some apple cider scented soup that’s pretty good!

can you remember what happened yesterday?

Gosh I can’t remember if this was yesterday or the day before, but I scrolled through someone’s Ghostbur tag for like TWENTY MINUTES STRAIGHT. AND I DID NOT REACH THE END OF THE TAG. THERE WERE JUST SO MANY GHOSTBUR POSTS!!! OH IT WAS GLORIOUS!!!

I know for a fact that I celebrated thanksgiving with extended family yesterday :) And we brought our dog Ginger along! She had a great time and was spoiled with several bits of turkey XD

My little three year old cousin sat on my lap while he ate some cake, and he was SO CUTE OH MY GOODNESS. He’s just… so small 🥺 Oh I love him.

I listened to quite a lot of music as well! Mostly AJR; ever since their new album release, my love for them has been REIGNITED!!!!

can i tag you in random stuff?

YES PLEASE!!! I don’t care if it’s a tag game, a post from another fandom, a random post, a post about something I’m interested in, something funny, something unbelievably cursed… anything at all! I freaking love being tagged in stuff!! Always makes me so happy :D

So yes please, please, please tag me in stuff!!! I’d hekkin love it :D

[aotvfilm]

Holiday Pal is here! Bringing you presents and good cheer! :D So sorry about my late replies, my late asks.... grrr. I would like things to mellow out, now!

It was quite a short rainstorm, unfortunately! Rain is my favorite too-- do you enjoy doing anything in particular when it rains outside?

I am sorry to hear about family things; not too serious on my end, just that my mother is freaking out over the holidays and my sibling and I must do a lot to make sure things go smoothly for her. I hope that when the holidays are over, I can be here for you if you ever need to vent or just want to chat! :Dsdlkjfskjf!!

I am going to read this fic ASAP it looks so amazing, thank you Becky!!! <3 I have something for you toooo x wish i was good at art, but I was wondering if I could write you a little drabble for when I reveal myself! And that could be a little Christmas gift for you!

If you might be so kind as to tell me some favorite tropes or some prompts, I'd love to give you something genuine and full of love!

Questions!!

Cinnamon or ginger? I loveee ginger, so ginger haha! I did buy nutmeg and cinnamon today for something special hehe!

Jam or buttercream? Buttercream because it's really wonderful-- it's the frosting on certain types of cake!

Favorite kinds of food, either savoury or baked goods? CAPRESE IS SO GOOD OMG! How do you prepare it? Yes riceeee!

My answer is so different lol, because I very much like savoury foods and I like meat a lot ! But veggies are really good too, so I'd say anything salty with meat and potatos and veggies

4. Do you bake/cook any special meals for the holidays? I'm so sorry about your neighbour, that is a truly kind gesture! Yeah, for me it's gingerbread and cranberry sorbet which takes a full day to make, ummm potatoes au gratin, and this year is beef of some kind for the central dish. I did want to make a yule log but I always get shot down because it's "too much work!" haha!

Are you listening to any good music right now or podcasts? How are you feeling about the holidays coming?

Sending you more love, and that you can expect better and quicker answers from me!

<3 <3 <3 xxx

HIII HOLIDAY PAL IVE MISSED YOU <<<<3

i love when it rains because it’s cloudy and dreary and idk it just feels right to me. maybe that sounds sad but i’m a mellow person so the whole atmosphere feels nice. i’m jealous that you had a rain storm! we’ve had an awful lot of snow lately. i love snow too but rain is my favorite.

hopefully everything calms down for you & your family! it’s so sweet that your sibling & you try to make the holidays easier for your mother. have you done all of your holiday shopping?

i hope you enjoy the fic!! :) and oh my gosh i would love a drabble!!! you are the sweetest ever. i’ll have to spend some time thinking of a gift back to you! as for my favorite tropes: i love famous/famous or famous/non famous. i also love any iteration of exes/friends/enemies to lovers! or anything canon that gives like a little peak into what life might be like or was like for h&l. but really i’m willing to read anything though so don’t feel constrained! i’ll be more than happy to read whatever you write x im so very excited :)

what did you buy nutmeg & ginger for? are you making a treat? 🍩 🍰 🧁

i think i’ve only had crappy store made buttercream frosting. i bet homemade is much better though!

i love caprese sandwiches! i toast part of a baguette the put pesto & argula & mozzarella & tomato & balsamic glaze! now i’m craving one haha

haha, we’re complete opposites with our favorite foods! i dislike anything salty & im a vegetarian. what’s your favorite type of meat though? i always loved fish (ik ik not technically a meat but im counting it. i don’t eat it anymore tho ): )

ooo, a cranberry & gingerbread sorbet. i have never had anything like that. send me some in your next ask, ok? and go for the yule log!!! it’ll be a fun experience and maybe a new tradition for you!

as for podcasts/music: i struggle with finding podcasts i like! my favorite is ancient history fangirl though. i’m a history nerd! how about you, what podcasts do you listen to? any recommendations? not gonna lie, i listen to fitf about once a day. when i’m not listing to louis i’m usually playing sam fender. he just released a new live album so i’ve loved hearing some of my favs recorded live. oh and i’ve been listening to a band called mac saturn! i just bought tickets to see them in february so i’m excited. have you been listening to holiday music?

for me it doesn’t really feel like the holidays are coming. my partner & i exchanged gifts already so all that’s left is to give a few to my younger family members. plus, i work the 24th & 25th so it’s like ehhhh. i miss being little & looking forward to christmas so much. are you excited & ready to celebrate yule? :)

sending you all of the love back x i cant wait to hear from you! and i’m so excited for your drabble. xx

also i just reread my answer before posting it and it made me laugh how all over the place it is. we have so many lines of conversation going - i love it!!

[gallavich-headcanon]

OKAY fine I love this Big Brother AU so much that I am glad you got me talking about it.

Okay but imagine Ian pissing Mickey off (he ate the last piece of potato right off of Mickey's plate.) So Mickey decides to be the little asshole that he is and make up funny things about Ian. (a la rimming situation in s11) just weird things, like, "Ian used to shower with socks on when he was little." or "Ian dressed up as Pippi Longstocking 4 Halloweens in a row!" or "hi Ian! remember that time that you cried because of a toilet paper commercial?" just for people to be like "Okay......" and Ian kinda has to decide if he's rolling with it? or calling Mickey on his bluff?

these two really only ever get a break in bed, huh? which. ironic. -> yep yep! but they don't even get a break there. well, it's a break from pretending but not the close proximity, and they have shit to figure out. Even though it usually just turns into them goofing around and exchanging stories.

the comfort that oozes out this giant ginger is INSANE. -> isn't it crazy that the guy that has so much energy and keeps wanting to talk to everyone and work out all the time is the best relaxing agent Mickey has ever encountered? especially when he places a hand on the back of Mickey's neck, or just casually on his thigh. let the tiny raccoon have a restful nap on his lap -> oh yes. Mickey is such a cute napper. Ian likes playing with his hair.

What if , on their first night, when someone catches Ian by himself and asks him what does he love about Mickey, the first thing that Ian says is "I like how he smells"? Because he is freaking out but he did get a good whiff of him when they entered the house? lol

The producers hit the jackpot with those two. -> that franchise will be SO sad to let them go. -> IDEA ALERT what if the network doesn't let them go? what if they are the hosts of the next season? there would be a lot of censuring Mickey's words but this duo can be so entertaining! the hilarious commentary!

Oh can you imagine the people in the house that are just obsessed with I&M's relationship? they have no tv, no books, only each other as entertainment. And you can bet your ass these two are the funniest people in the house. So of course some of the people there become their friends and will advocated for their friends and private telenovela to stay in the house. (also- Do you think there's anybody homophobic in the house?)

God the nerves each week when they wait to see if they get to stay in the house!!! Also I bet if Mickey gets nominated to be on the vote list, Ian does a whole monolog to the camera about why everyone should be voting to keep Mickey in the house. Maybe later on they each decide that if the other one has to leave, they would too. Because the thought of staying disconnected, sleeping in their bed by themselves, not having a morning coffee together, is just so devastating that it's not worth it?

(what if they gave each other something that first week and it became their lucky charm, so they put it on on every elimination night? like maybe Mickey sprayed his cologne on Ian that first time (and vice versa), and now they do it each week?)

i promise i'll answer to everything else asap, but-

-> Nosho don't get me started with a Big Brother reality show type of AU.

you can't just drop this and not expect me to ask you to elaborate!

HAHAHAHAHA nosho I am sitting alone laughing like a maniac

I told you not to indulge me on this one! I still have reblogs to reply to and now I'm gonna have to add another one to our ever growing list of AUs. This is one is on you, my friend. When we, inevitably, lose our minds, I want you to go back to this moment.

Okay, so my knowledge about Big Brother is very limited because I've only watched one season like 8 years ago (don't judge me, I was after surgery and couldn't walk for a while. It's insanely addictive though, with the whole 24/7 live stream)

But in the season I watched they had 2 random tenants (the first two that entered the house) pretend they are exes. Like the secret mission was to successfully make the other 20 people believe they are exes even though they've never met. They had 10 minutes, until the next person joins them, to come up with a story. In this they only had to keep it up for 2 days but-

In my AU - Ian and Mickey have to pretend to be together. They enter the house last, together. They get 10 minutes to come up with a convincing back story. They are told they have to keep everyone convinced for a week. Even if one person goes to the big brother and tells them that they think I&M are lying about it, they whole house loses. (the whole house participates in an activity that they believe to be the real weekly mission).

So when they both realize they are from the south side of Chicago, and are gay, they know they can pull it off. They keep the rest as close to reality as possible- Ian (25) is an EMT, Mickey (27) is a tattoo artist.

In the house they are the only ones to get a double bed and obviously they are expected to sleep together.

Will they convince everyone? will they fail the secret mission? Will they actually fall in love?

[vritest]

deja vu

fezco x fem!reader

tw: UNEDITED, drug usage, fez being aggressive, nate jacobs, angst!!!! and fluff

a/n: let me know if i should make a part two!

felt like this song sets the mood for this story lol :)

•••••••

the first time you met fezco it had been an accident. you didn't even want to attend that party that hot summer night. you're cousin, maddy had invited you, forcefully and threatened that you would regret it if you didn't come, since it was your first day in california. you originally went there to visit family, but well, vacations always end with a big unexpected suprise.

that suprise being, fezco.

that night at the party where all you could smell was sweat, weed and alcohol, you had lost maddy out of your sight while going over to the little bar counter to get a drink, maybe vodka, you don't quite remember since all the labels were taken off. by the time you had returned to the couch where you had last seen maddy, she was gone. at first you freaked out because- what the hell were you supposed to do at a party where you knew, well nobody. so you spent the next 30 minutes walking around, whoever house it was, looking for your short cousin but there was no sight of her so eventually- you stopped calling her and looking for her, now aware she wasn't going to show up anytime soon and you accepted the fact you were going to be alone for a while. you remember spotting a couch outside, and noticing a ginger guy, fezco. there was no other free couches anywhere that weren't filled with teenagers making out and grinding in their boyfriends so it was either that or sitting next to a complete stranger. you chose to sit down to this stranger.

your heels clicked against the concrete as you headed outside the house and noticed a free couch finally. you sighed contently, spotting fezco on the other side. a joint in between his pointer and ring finger, as he let out a large cloud of smoke. you got closer to him as he started noticing your presence, looking you up and down wondering if you were just a person trying to get drugs or something, like normal, but boy was he wrong. you clasped both your hands behind your back and breathed in sharply

“you mind if i sit here” you asked, your voice much softer than he imagined you would sound like, still he looked up at you his blue eyes staring into yours before he responded.

“nah, go ahead” fez said as he scooted over the couch, yourself letting a small smile as a thank you and the ginger continued smoking. you grabbed your phone tightly looking around nervously hopping your cousin would show up and you both would go home because you were so over this even after being there for less than an hour. your nervous stare wasn’t unoticed though, fezco was quick to notice your eyes and it’s tenderness they held as you looked around the backyard. he couldn’t hide his curiosity

“um- you okay? you lookin kinda scared right now” he chuckled, bringing up his joint to his mouth once again taking it in. you turned over to look at him, his voice slightly startling you, and you finally noticed what you hadn’t notice before you even saw him for the first time. this man was handsome, so handsome it was so hard to describe it in words. especially when he was smoking like the way he was right now, his eyes interrupted your thoughts, remembering his question he had asked before you got stuck in this daydream.

you let out a small laugh as you shook your head sharply “me? pfft no i just- im waiting for someone and she’s not showing up so” you sighed looking down at your lap and up again, slightly slouching as the boys eyes were still in your figure. he furrowed his eyebrows wondering how he could help the pretty girl sitting in front of him.

“who’s the person you lookin for? i might know them, not tryinna be creepy of course just wanna help” he said correcting himself, you slightly chuckled, and licked your lips.

“her name is maddy, maddy perez”

he widened his eyes as the name definitely rang a bell, the girlfriend of non other than Nate fucking Jacobs, he almost gagged at the thought of that assholes name. he gulped.

“yeah yeah i know her, um shit i haven’t seen her around here, neither have i seen her crazy ass boyfriend” he said, taking in the marijuana inhaling it out his nose this time, different from the times before. you widened your eyes as he said she had a boyfriend. you tilted your head in confusion, as you sat up.

“she never told me she had a boyfriend” you muttered, he laughed at your confused tone and nodded as he sighed slightly still almost throwing up at the topic of the conversation at the momment.

“yeah she does, he’s an asshole too. all he does is bark and not bite, a avaragefuckboy. i don’t doubt he’s fucking her right at this momment.”

you laughed at the comment of your cousin, still really confused where all this stuff was coming from, but surprisingly the man sitting in front of you had made you a lot more comfortable than before.

“what’s yo name?” he asked blowing out a cloud of smoke. you smiled.

“y/n.”

“fezco.”

slowly you too both created a comfortable environment and it felt amazing. especially after feeling like shit for the last few months because of shit that has happened to you that you never really like to talk about.

after talking to what felt like hours talking from, maddy to eachothers embarrassing moments in middle school, you both shared your phone numbers with a large grin on both of your faces, hoping you guys would meet sometime soon. you never got over the feeling that fezco had left you with, butterflies in your stomach and you used to not believe in that cringe shit but now you don’t doubt that that’s the feeling that he gave you and he could say the exact same thing about you. after that night, you both didn’t stop texting like every minute. his good morning and night messages would leave you smiling at the screen, maddy would notice how much you smiled recently, part of her was happy for you that you we’re finally becoming a lot happier that you did before but she also wondered who that person was. she knew you had met someone that night.

texts with fezco went from, good morning and good night to full on paragraphs of how much you two wanted to see eachother, and finally you did. one day you decided to sneak out of maddys house that wou were staying in since, you were there for vacation, you successfully got out and walked to fez’s. the first time you stepped in there you automatically knew you wanted to stay there forever, his presence made you feel comfortable and things you’ve never quite felt in your life. you also met, ashtray, his brother. at first you thought he hated you, since you were coming more often everyday, but quickly you noticed that wasn’t the cases, and in fact it was the exact opposite, he liked you. ashtray always hated people that would even breathe at fezcos direction the ring way, but with you the first time he had met you, he thought you were so badass. he especially liked when you would come over to his house on early mornings, and make him pancakes, something that fez never leaned to mastered .

fezco opened the door from his room, waking over to the kitchen, the sent of pancake batter hitting his freckled nose softly as he sniffed, his eyes reverting to your figure in his shirt as you flipped a pancake on the stove in the small kitchen, ash sitting on the table waiting patiently as you finished , your giggles shared with ash as you both talked about something he couldn’t quite hear correctly, both eyes meeting fezcos as you two noticed he had woken up.

“no fucking way you did that y/n-“ ash said, you both looked over at fez, you let out a small smile as you spotted your boyfriend quickly letting go of the pan and ran towards his hugging him, as he hugged back.

“good morning babe”

“mornin baby”

ash letting a gagging noise, “get a room, god” he said as he let out sarcastic vomiting noises, you and fezco laughing.

fez loved that about you, the fact that you could be so likable and you, he loved that you made him feel normal, like he wasn’t just some dumb drug dealer you didn’t need to pretend someone you were not, right?

well, you lied.

you were so in love you hadn’t mentioned the most important thing at the moment, you were only going to be in california for two more days, and you didn’t know how to tell him. all does days of sneaking out just to see him and his brother. all those days he would take you out to places you’ve never been before, taking you on experiences you’ve never had before, treating you like a goddess every single fucking day. fez would made sure that you felt like you had people that loved you every single day , and you didn’t say a word about how you were only here for a limited time, you lied to his face and told him you’d just moved. when you didn’t. all you wanted to do was cry in bed and never wake up. but that wasn’t an option at the time. becases all of this was your fault.

fezco had taken you to a beach that was close to east highland. he was still clueless to your current situation, you eyes filling up with tears as you and fez sat on the soft sand, the noise of the waves hitting the shore softly, as fezco reverted your gaze to your worried face that made him worried now. he shifted his body closer to yours, bringing his fingers to your chin, lifting up your head. as your eyes, glimmered in the sunlight.

“y/n, what’s wrong. did someone do sum to you? i swear i’ll fuck them up-“

the tears you had been holding in, finally strolling down your face. soft sobs coming out of your tiny mouth, your lips swollen, the once that he used to kiss ever so slightly.

“i fucked up, like really fucking bad fez” you said, sniffling as you moved your head, your eyes, no longer meeting yours anymore. you brought you hand up wiping off your tears with the back of your hand, fez still confused where all this was coming from. had he done something wrong? we’re you going to break up with him?

“what?”

“i’m gonna leave california, in two days fez.”

he felt like he was about to die at the momment. his brain still trying to process what you had just said. he chuckled sarcastically.

“funny, you just moved, stop fucking around”

“i’m not!” you yelled. he jumped at the tone of voice you’d never used, in the 3 moths of knowing you, fez put 2 and 2 together realizing, you were serious, you weren’t joking. you eyes were still not facing him, as he huffed.

“so you lied to my fucking face y/n, if i’m understanding correctly ?”

your lip quivered, his eyes still in your figure that refused to look at him, fez reached over to your chin once’s again turning your face, to look at him at his blue eyes, that held every memory you two had together. you were still crying. fez didn’t know what to do. both of you sat there in silence for a few minutes. as he tried comforting you, but it was so hard to because, of everything all his memories flashing through his eyes all at once. and so he made his final decision.

“i think, you should go.”

he said more calmly that before. you looked over at him biting your lower lip, as you were still unresponsive. you didn’t know what shattered you the most, if the fact that your boyfriend had technically dumped you, or, the fact that you had lied to him for months. you felt like shit, complete shit. so when he pulled over to your house one last time as if your relationship meant nothing, unlocking the car doors without saying goodbye, that was your breaking point.

••••••••

it had been 2 years since then. you were at east highland again. visiting your cousin, maddy. as you both talked on her bed, your mind still containing of only fezco, and what he was up to right now, you wondered if he got another girl now, if he was doing better without you.

“bitch are you even listening?” maddy asked, you sighed rolling your figure to look up at maddy standing infront of her mirror fixing her hair to go to a party with her for the first time, since you’d met fezco that summer night. you sighed.

“sorry- i wasn’t paying attention, what’d you say?” you asked, maddy groaned as she continued fixing her hair with styling gel.

“i said, that i know you have a thing with fezco, y/n”

your eyes widened at the name, laughing nervously, letting out a ‘whattttt’ as the girl tuned to look at you once again, her eyes serious, you knew there was no getting out of this.

“you think i didn’t notice all those times you would sneak out? or when you cried the last day here?” she asked.

“shit, i didn’t know i was that obvious..” you said trailing off, maddy chuckled slightly sitting down next to you as you layed down facing up staring into space.

“he asked me about you y/n” maddy said as he paused looking over to you, as your eyes softened. he definitely still had the kindness you admired so much, she continued “he kept coming up to me at party’s when i was with kat and cass pulling me over to ask about you. trust me y/n, when i say i’ve never seen someone more fucking in love than fezco” she said, you chuckled again this time, a real chuckle. she sighed as she layed down next to you making eye contact with you.

“give him a chance” she encouraged.

you sighed.

“maybe i will”

[xokiddo]

Thank you so much for your sweet tags and memes and comments and just general ENCOURAGEMENT for CtL 😭😭 it means so much coming from you because I adore your stuff toooooo.

Also. I have a request, if you ever feel like indulging … do you have any headcanons for expectant Dads Levi/ Porco/ Floch/ Eren??? (Or whoever else you fancy!)

I love your takes. I’m intrigued. 💜✨

YES. MY TIME HAS COME

This is a lengthy one lol. I may have gotten a little carried away. 😅 I wrote headcanons for all four.

also, fyi, my source for pregnancy knowledge: i'm a mom

--

Levi:

This man. This man. He will be cool, calm collected on the outside, but internally he is shitting himself.

It’s a shock at the start of your pregnancy. You have to repeat yourself when you tell him you’re pregnant, because um, excuse me what the fuck? You almost worry that he’s about to bail when he just grabs you and hugs you and holds you.

Best man to have during morning sickness. The bathroom is always pristine, so you’ll always have a clean toilet to stick your head in. He’s also willing to hold your hair back if needed, bring you ginger candies after, keep saltines or bread by your bedside.

Feeling those first kicks? Wow. Early on, when only you feel it, he’s a little envious, but then he grows worried he won’t feel the kicks. What if the baby already hates him and doesn’t kick?

One regular evening, you’re sitting on the sofa when he gets home from work, and you gasp and whisper for him to come here. He does, a little worried, and you just take his hands and place them on your belly. He begins to withdraw, but you tighten your hold on his wrists, and then he feels it. You’ve grown used to the kicks, but he feels the nudge against his middle and ring fingers, and then another just below at his pinky. His lips part, his eyes widen, and he stares at his hand because on the other side is his child.

You admit that the baby kicks a lot when you look at him because he makes your heart race, but he just hasn’t had good timing when he touches your belly.

Braxton-Hicks contractions (false labor contractions) fucking terrify him. When he sees you stop walking, breathe deeply for a moment as you try to shake it off, he panics and asks what’s wrong, only for you to wave him off and say “stop being so dramatic.” He’ll roll his eyes at you, but he’ll watch you extra close after that.

When you’re actually in labor?! Forget it. This man is your fucking rock. He’ll barely leave your side to piss lest he misses something.

Labor pains are indescribable pain. Seeing you, unable to speak or hardly even damn breathe through them, coming in every few minutes, makes him feel so painfully helpless it’s terrifying.

That moment he first sees and holds your child, though? Magic. Pure magic. You’ve never seen him so awestruck and vulnerable all at once, and he’s so in love it hurts.

Porco

Ultimate Dad Lad™️

Seriously. Practices Dad Jokes starting the week after you get that positive pregnancy test. Literally has a note in his phone full of them.

Ok but when he finds out you’re pregnant, you half-expect him to freak out, but he just stares at you and asks, “For real life?” and the way he looks almost excited makes you laugh because of course he’s okay with it. He’s not just okay with it - he thinks this is a miracle.

First person he calls is Marcel to tell him he’s going to be an uncle. You have to rein him in not to tell anyone yet until you hit that 12 week mark, but he needs to shout about it to someone, and his brother is the first choice, naturally.

When he comes to the 12 week ultrasound, and it’s looking like a baby and not just a blob on the screen, he sobs. He holds your hand, and he’s so tense, and when he sees the side profile of the baby the wind is knocked from him. He stares at the screen where the ultrasound is displayed, and you look over, and he’s crying. He’s the happiest he’s ever been - so far.

Loves the kicks. Will sing to your belly, talk to the baby, ramble on while you’re laying in bed.

Buys onesies from his favorite sports teams. Gets teary-eyed when you buy a onesie that says Rad Like Dad.

Definitely the dad who will proudly baby-wear, calling himself a kangaroo in the process. He’ll get himself and the baby matching hats to wear.

Freaks out a little when you go into labor. (“Oh shit it’s happening! Oh fuck - is it coming now?! We’re having a baby right now?”)

Holds your hair if you throw up in labor, brushes it out of the way when you get sweaty, holds you and rubs your back when you’re bent over trying to breathe through contractions.

If you get an epidural, he may pass out if he sees the needle. (After the delivery he’ll call you a motherfucking rockstar for being able to sit through it.)

His composure absolutely shatters when he first holds the baby. He cries and cradles the newborn, doing skin-to-skin immediately and whispering the sweetest words to the baby. (“Hi baby, I’m your dad.” “You’re the most perfect little thing I’ve ever seen.” “You’re so loved.”)

Floch

Oh boy.

I can see him kind of not having the best reaction when he finds out you’re pregnant - though not in a bad way, but he just pales and stares at the positive window on the pregnancy test. You have to touch his arm to remind him that you’re there, very much waiting on a response, and he instantly grabs for you and hugs you tightly.

Instantly insists on doing everything for you. Acts of service really come into play for him here; he says he should be cooking for you, cleaning, literally name a task and he jumps at the chance to do it.

“I’m pregnant, Floch, not incapacitated.” “Let me help you.”

In all reality he’s terrified of you losing the baby, and you can appreciate the efforts he’s really putting in here.

A little overbearing about what you shouldn’t be doing. An example - eating lunch meat. Technically you shouldn’t be eating lunch meat, but you try to sneak a bite at Eren’s, to which Floch glares at you. (“You shouldn’t be eating that.” “It’s one piece, not an entire uncured ham.” “What if you get sick?”) But it’s all out of the best intentions.

He really dives into reading about everything to expect - particularly about the delivery and what can go wrong. He’s set on not being left in the dark and being prepared to step up should you be unable to coherently make decisions for yourself in labor, should things take a downward turn. You assure him he doesn’t have to study the material like he’s getting tested on it, but you realize his method of coping with his fear of all the what ifs of labor and delivery is being over-prepared.

You’re not sure why he’s so anxious. He has experience with children, he’s great with kids, but the idea of being a parent is what makes him nervous.

On a lighter note, he made one accidental comparison of the baby kicking to the chest-bursters from Alien and he always has a grin when he feels the baby kick because of the poorly timed joke.

He has a surprising eye for interior design, so you let him have more reign over designing the baby’s room.

When you do go into labor, you’re beyond thankful this man studied his ass off as if he’s taking a damn test because he’s there the entire time, ensuring that you thoroughly understand the doctors and nurses when they pop in and out through your labor, rather than idly sitting to the side.

When the baby is born, he pulls the chair up as close beside your bed as he can, and while you have the baby on your chest, he has his hand just under yours on the baby’s back and he marvels at you and your child. His child. He’s silently crying, cheeks pink, but fuck he’s so over the moon.

Eren

EREH

Y’all were actively trying to get pregnant, so no surprise pregnancy here, but he’s still elated nonetheless. When you come out with the news, he breaks into the biggest smile and he’s notably hiding tears when he buries his face in your neck, embracing you tightly.

He’s mildly prepared for the symptoms to come, but he takes it in stride. Being the son of a doctor, he’s not particularly squeamish.

He waits to tell his family in person in parts - his parents first, then Zeke. Grisha is stunned and Carla jumps up and squeals and then cries tears of joy. For Zeke, you both give him a onesie that says “World’s Best Uncle” and he’s a little confused at first, and then it hits him and he stares with his jaw agape before he brings the onesie to his chest, cradling it.

Zeke and Eren’s relationship is complicated, but overall it’s improved over the years, and this has served to bring them closer. Zeke is determined to be a present uncle. Eren is overjoyed by this, and thus, so are you.

Eren adores you pregnant. He claims that you’re glowing, even when you feel gross and not quite comfortable in your own skin, and he worships you in bed.

You both take full advantage of that 2nd trimester libido.

When he’s finally able to start feeling kicks, he pokes your belly with the hopes of the baby kicking the spot in turn. The moments when this does happen, he marvels at the fact that he’s playing with his baby already.

He does have anxiety around being an adequate father; Grisha was far from perfect, so would Eren make the same mistakes? To which you reassure him every time that he will do his best, and that’s all you can ask.

When you reach the point in your pregnancy that all you can really be comfortable in are dresses, he’s living. You, in a dress, all the time? Perfection in his eyes.

During your labor, he’s calm and collected on the surface, except for his eyes. You can see the stress written in his eyes, but he’s focused on keeping calm so he doesn’t add to the stress of your labor.

Cheers you on in your labor because you’re a fucking champ.

When the baby is born, his composure shatters and he cries when he first holds his child. He’s in awe of you, of the baby you made together, and the fact that this is all real, and he’s the happiest he’s ever been in his life.