#that he just gave me the amount for the poster and also bc of his new supervisor manager whatever the fuck postion let him

[lilgynt]

shit my partner has done in the last 48 hours: one. make fun of my dad who just got out of the hospital bc he beat me as kid allegedly two. slapped my ass in front my old coworkers bc she genuinely hates their guts

[crosbyism]

"but then again this is the guy who’s publically known for loving to eat ass so"

I'm sorry, I thought Nate eating ass was fanon. Are you telling me this is an actual canon fact??

god i love when people don’t realise how much “fanon” around sid and nate is actually canon. it’s like heroin to me. also bc it’s like. 90% of the stuff in fics (which is probably why people assume it’s fanon but. oh boy it’s not. there’s shockingly little fanon around these two, mostly because canon is so abundant).

yes, nathan mackinnon is a known ass-eater. let me direct you to this post, anon. you’re welcome.

other nate (and sid) facts you might not have realised are canon:

nate is a known advocate for therapy. he’s been seeing a sports therapist since 2017

they wear matching clothing all the fucking time, sid has said publicly that he started wearing white sneakers and updated his wardrobe due to nate’s influence (iirc nate might’ve even bought him his first pair of white sneakers? either that or it was a “he told me i need to so i did” situation). they share a tailor. unfortunately i now have to bring your attention to the fact that since they have an alarming amount of matching clothes that they’ve bought for each other, that means that they in fact have to know each other’s clothing sizes off by heart. they also low-key share clothing btw

their families celebrate canada day together and their dads are best friends. in-law behaviour goes crazy

nate did in fact stalk his way into sid’s heart (got the same personal trainer and agent at age 13; built his house next door in 2017; they’ve been spending every day in the summers together since at least 2015. sid cooks for them daily, or at least did pre-pandemic. sid refuses to use nate’s gym tho so they always use sid’s).

nate used to have a fan twitter account more or less where he rooted for the pens. it was active until 2017.

sid and nate regularly go to summer weddings together as each other’s dates. they have done this since, once again, at least 2015

nate has confirmed that he used to have a poster of sid on his wall as a teenager (he didn’t confirm he used to jerk off to it but frankly. i think that’d be saying the quiet part out loud)

when sid won the cup in 2009 and held the parade in cole harbour, nate stood by the side of the road watching it. he was about to turn 14, he was already working with sid’s trainer and agent, and he was about to start attending shattuck (sid’s junior high). due to old pics we also know that this was RIGHT before nate had his first growth spurt and hit puberty. i’m not saying seeing sid with the cup kickstarted nate’s puberty and gave him his first boner but i’m not NOT saying it

nate dated vanessa morgan of riverdale fame in his rookie year. she’s now good friends with elias petersson from the vancouver canucks (this means nothing but i do think it’s a very funny coincidence).

nate schmidt, formerly of the VGK, once failed a drug test (it turned out to be a testing-fuck-up); when nhl players were asked about it natemack iconically said “i don’t think he was sticking a needle up his ass” (i just like this one)

when he was a kid, the one other thing sid wanted to be was a hairdresser. nate, on the other hand, “didn’t have a plan B”

nate is canonically possessive of sid (see: the asg 2024) and sid is canonically delighted by this and into it

they go on so many lunch dates in the summer my dude. they go grocery shopping together. like there’s so many pics of them in grocery stores or out having coffee or weird green shakes

oh i almost forgot, they went on a roadtrip through ireland last year. they’ve been on holiday together multiple times over the years though. done some eurotripping together and stuff. in 2015 they spent three months together, three weeks of which were spent living in sid’s santa monica condo together just the two of them

sid has put up a picture of every stanley cup winning captain in his basement since 2008, when the pens lost in the scf to DET. apparently this serves as motivation for him to win the cup. he notoriously does not watch the playoffs after the pens are out

however, he partied so hard at nate’s cup party he actually closed down the party with his dad. nate is the only non-teammate sid’s ever been seen supporting for a cup run (he’s also never been to his teammates’ cup parties afaik so. there’s that)

also they talked on the phone daily and between periods during nate’s cup run. they also canonically have almost weekly phone dates that can run multiple hours. quote nate “i can’t talk to anyone else the way i can talk to him”

they each have pictures of the two of them together framed in each other’s houses

there’s rumours they’re building adjoining houses on neighbouring properties in cape breton next to a golf course bc apparently being neighbours in halifax isn’t enough or something. this one is as yet unconfirmed by reputable sources though

[lemon-plort]

[ FFVII Demo thoughts below :) ]

Dumping all my first impressions here now that I've sat on it for a bit

PROS

This is probably going to be a bit of a mess bc there's just so much I love about this franchise...

Starting off obvious, the music oh my god. Nobuo Uematsu smashed it out but that was to be expected.

I absolutely adore how they explored Cloud's recollection of events from his pov!! Zack's mannerisms and personality showing through while the real Cloud stayed in the background and kept mostly silent (especially around Tifa). It was cool to see, and I think they did a great job blending cloud's perspective with what actually happened. It felt believable that Cloud could recall everything the way he did and seeing how his mind mended or flat out ignored the gaps and inconsistencies was perfect.

Speaking of, the method they chose to retell it. I'm so glad they opted for more of a story around a campfire kind of approach than just showing us through flashbacks. The added dialogue from Barret, Tifa and Aerith was the cherry on top.

Loved the choice system

I've seen others mention it too but how they aren't afraid to keep things a little silly :)) Cloud stuffing his mouth with those sandwiches, butchering Tifa's theme on the piano and stretching with the exercise class were great little moments and I can't wait to see more.

Sephiroth. He honestly deserves multiple bullet points. I LOVE how we got to see more of his personality pre-nibelheim disaster. His banter and expressions were such a welcome addition since I feel they never expanded on it nearly enough in crisis core! He looked genuinely upset after losing the other Shinra trooper and the amount of expression purely in his eyes during and just before the disaster- *chefs kiss*

The small details around the environment, I spent a good chunk of the time just getting in the camera mode and zooming into all the pictures Tifa had around her room or the posters in the general store and inn.

How realistic the physics were for those mako purifiers?? It made me feel like I was back hauling around road cases

Screw it he is getting more points. I need to mention his hair and boots. I couldn't stop looking at them, they were so nicely rendered...

Expanding on that everything was tbh. The fabric of Cloud's pants looks so so soft (they were looking a bit rough in remake) and all the detailing on the buster sword and metal like Tifa's gloves. I could spend hours just zooming into every little detail and texture.

I also think they nailed Cloud and Tifa's models. They both clearly look like themselves even though they're younger which I feel some games struggle with.

More Sephiroth points soz- his model was just so accurate. There were shots where his silhouette literally looked like his original art, it was so satisfying to see.

The use of the L2 R2 buttons. Idk the proper name for the feature but when they make it physically harder to press. I feel they used it sparingly which made it more effective. That scene especially with Cloud crawling towards Sephiroth...oh my god chills. It gave me the same sense of immersion like the end of Crisis Core during Zack's final stand.

More on the immersion. How they differentiated between Sephiroth and "Cloud's" skill levels by allowing Sephiroth to cast the higher level spells from the get go.

Combo moves!! One of my favourite features in FFXV so to see it translated here was great

Just going to make a general point for the atmosphere, environment, voice acting, enemy design etc. bc otherwise I'll be here forever.

Though the scene with Sephiroth cutting down all the tubes has to get a special mention. The pure disdain in his voice towards Hojo was done super well.

CONS

Some of these might be a little nitpicky since I really don't have much to complain about

I found some of the dialogue to be a little clunky at times, like the characters weren't given enough time to say their line before the camera changes. This is probably just a translation issue though and really doesn't bother me that much

Not the biggest fan of the white interface for your spells n shit. It feels like it sticks out a lot more than the blue and not in a good way.

I think I just generally prefer remakes UI (except the pause screen, I enjoy getting to see their models rather than the still images we had before)

Moving around the map is a bit clunkier than I would've hoped. The inside areas were better but outside felt choppy at times.

the storage space....

MISC.

I find it generally funny how they completely skipped over any mention of gackt Genesis. Like it makes sense but as someone with no real hatred towards him like a lot of fans have, it came across like square enix was shoving him in a box and hoping no one brings it up lolol

surprised to see we're getting a demo update too, the Junon demo? curious to see what they'll cover in that

Overall though I'm absolutely buzzing. February 29th can't get here soon enough :)))

[pinchan]

What about the kyoto kids in school? What do you think they are like? + utahime too if you want :)

there's a volume extra of the students and their rating on their strength intelligence etc somewhere but i'm not gonna use that as reference bc i can't find them </3

mai: bullies miwa to do her essays for her. during classes she would often space out and dismantle and reassemble her pen. she needs to keep her hands busy to focus, and she likes assignments where she could touch things directly better and is also better at those. jujutech helped smuggle the guns she uses but she also has a few handmade ones. if you see a copious amount of soft drinks in the communal fridge don't even think about touching it

todo: it's canon that he's good at teaching others, so i think it would be hilarious if he's also the smartest in kyoto. everyone hates it. they could always come to him for help with their homework but they don't want to. it's always a last ditch effort at the possible cost of their life. not worth it

momo: best at essays and research, has a very good eye on where to look for the things she needs. very eloquent in her words that her usual struggle is that she wrote too long for the assignment, then would have a hard time cutting it down to size bc she's a perfectionist. would gladly help her juniors with lessons but they're either too intimidated (miwa), too prideful (kokichi), or would rather bully someone else to do it for them (mai). takes mai to study dates pretty regularly to help her catch up with classes since she knows mai struggles with lessons she doesn't care about, and often chides/teases her to watch her sugar if she doesn't wanna croak early

miwa: she tends to fade into the background, being just above average in kyoto doesn't really favor her much. she's fluent at english though so just like how english classes gave me a miniature god complex in middle school she's noticeably brighter and more confident during english classes. she's also into takada-chan but not to bring her own demise she keeps it on the down low

kokichi: another one that spaces out a lot in class. his classes are pretty much online classes so it's especially easy for him to, not to mention the teachers can't always tell if he is bc. well. mechamaru doesn't really emote. he has tiny puppets he sometimes use to wiggle around his classmates' desks if class gets particularly tedious, doing flips or whatever silly thing without a word or a glance. lets mai dissect mechamaru if he's feeling bored enough. also i was reading his wiki for some reference and yeah me too

[text desc: Cause of stress: All the time. /end desc]

noritoshi: he likes to think he's not a teacher's pet but a guy with his own standing but....... he kinda is. he doesn't voice his complaints a lot either and often go with whatever bs his teachers want him to do. he's the poster kid of kyoto for both being a hardworking student and a compliant sorcerer from a big clan. he tries SO hard. little guy has that tunnel vision. his stick-in-the-ass and occasional no-fun-allowed attitude means he's often the prime target for pranks. loosen him up a little before he gets sore. after his talk with maki he wished he let himself be stupid and act like teens when he was still in school

[ickymichi]

𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐔𝐏 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐒!

what’s this?: hcs of the scouts living together!

warnings: like 1 slightly nsfw one mentioned nothing serious, swearing, crack fic, modern au.

note: these hcs r probably the only thing keeping me going sidbsj. so wanted to share them with you guys, might make a more detailed part two who knows n e way, hope you enjoy! reblogs are greatly appreciated <3

© k1ttykawa 2021

first off this house will be the loudest, most chaotic place you’ll ever witness.

like they should have their own reality show.

so who’s in this hell hole?

well we’ve the two trios, eren mikasa & armin and jean connie & sasha.

six people in a house is gonna need a house cleaner to come over twice every week, and that mans name is levi. he usually doesn’t mind his job but when it comes to this house, he questions his life choices.

anyway! yeah what goes down? well let’s go through every room!

first off we’ll start with eren cause :p his room is like every other guys, sports achievement trophies on his shelf’s, signed jerseys hung on the wall and the same checkered sheets that he hasn’t changed in a while.

it’s always somehow always messy.

he does spend a considerable amount of time in their just playing on his play station, probably only comes out to get food.

and ofc he has l.e.d.s 🙄

next is armin! his is so quaint i love it

it just screams armin. books after books along his floor to ceiling book shelf, desk with every stationary you could think of. and is bed is always made and not a spec of dirt on the floor.

doesn’t spend too much time in his room and spends more time downstairs with the others.

mikasa my love <3 when i think of modern au mikasa, i think of goth!mikasa </3

her room is just such a viobe

so many plants!! and tapestries! she reads manga okay idc :( she has so much tho! her fav is romance </3 also has leds and a really funky full length mirror she found at a local store!

jean bo’s room is acc so nice. it has to be for all the girls he brings over

but yeah posters galore of his favourite anime (one piece, naruto, beck, death note etc) manga collector also!

also has his favourite band posters. he really likes posters k? doesn’t like to have plain walls

has those open wardrobe things, as well as an actual wardobe cause he has so much clothes.

and ofc, he got the leds

also he has this big ass tv and plays his music really loud off it.

connie my luuvvv!!

somehow, god only knows, mf got the biggest room when they were picking. really he just got the longest straw

anyway, his room pls, big ass bed, big ass tv, big ass wardobe AND he got a whole en-suite!

jean and eren and soo fcking jealous of his room pls.

he spends a lot of time on the play station with eren and jean. loves that he can hear eren screaming through his headphones and down the hall.

he also is a manga fanatic! but doesn’t have as much as jean yet! also don’t tell jean, but he stole a few volumes of bleach and he’s waiting for the day he noticed

also has his favourite artists and anime posters, won this really cool rengoku figure that he has in a glass case with his luffy and sukuna figures. yes, he loves collecting things.

as well as that he has an alcohol stand that has just bottles of beer to the most expensive tequila.

he has this speaker that quite literally shakes the floor and never doesn’t have music playing. even if it’s 2am that things going.

obviously got the leds

sasha </3 her room is just, you’d want to live in it that’s all i can say.

has like three mini fridges, two beside lockers all full of snacks and drinks.

her bed is the comfiest in the whole house, everyone comes into her room just to lay in it for a while.

has this really soft rug that she loves to lie on when watching tv or her laptop.

binges a lot of shows so she doesn’t come out of her room unless she wants to watch it downstairs with the others

got the leds‼️

now that we’ve seen all the bedrooms, what actually goes down in the facility?

connie or jean definitely went viral for those videos like these, they’re always on my fyp and i love it so he makes these like every few nights and they probably look like this:

armin is probably either studying or watching whatever’s on netflix

eren is most likely in his room on the ps or napping. gets annoyed every time connie comes in to record the tiktok -_-

sasha is either in the kitchen making something she saw on tiktok or in her room binging shows

mikasa is probably cleaning her room or a different part of the house or doing her make up/hair with her music v loud ofc <3

and jean and connie are either in each others rooms or fixing jeans car that keeps breaking down. with vv loud music ofc.

during the day though is like the same except the boys are probably out in the back garden playing basketball while mikasa and sasha watch on the grass catching some rays 😎

music is a reacquiring theme here bc there’s always someone blaring music.

also, jean is always bringing girls home from when him and eren go out and sasha n armin will just watch him run upstairs with her like 🧍‍♀️ 🧍 there goes another one

connie is forever scaring anyone and recording it. he has about 10 montages on tiktok of him hiding in a cupboard or even just around the corner and scaring someone. most times it’s jean cause he a scaredy-cat. did it to eren and he gave him a black eye out of ‘reflexes’

they love spending nights together sitting on the couch and watching different movies or just sitting together and talking.

dinner is spent at the table together every night and it’s honestly everyone’s favourite time of the day.

omg cleaner levi who comes to clean twice a week, connie gets on his nerves soo bad pls😭 he’s always asking him questions and being like “yo big man you need a hand?”

jean and connie spend a lot of time in each other’s rooms just sitting on the bed and scrolling through tiktok and sometimes eren joins and though the two won’t admit it, jean and eren love it when he does cause they have suuuch laughs pls i’m talking tears and sore sides.

[talkingtea]

See, this is why I seriously side-eye candice fans that still like him (there’s a surprising amount of them on twt) after the all the shit he’s done to her. him liking that comment was not an accident, end of discussion. i literally will never understand why liked it at all. what, did she forget to kiss his ass about something like the rest of the cast so he got mad and lashed out like a prepubescent child? he saw a comment saying that a character he spends 80% of his scenes with, is his characters ‘love of his life’, a character that he’s aware has received hate from day one, should die and something in that brain of his that i assume he has told him to like it?? And never unlike it also?? What happened to Mr Warden Westallen?? He’s so full of shit. I’m wondering why he even pushed for WA to happen earlier if that’s how he really feels about Iris. And that’s probably not the worst stunt he’s pulled in the 3000 mile long list of pure unbridled bullshit. Was going to say karma will get him one day, but i clearly already has and has been beating his ass for a while now. So yeah if you claim you’re a candice fan but still like him after having knowledge of all his foolery towards her for years, im going to start questioning the fuck out of the validity that you actually like her. bc name one good he’s done other than “advocate” for WA that warrants him keeping your support? I’ll wait. One “right” does not fix a cesspool of wrongs. And i know some ppl will come on here and criticise me bc you can’t “police other peoples interests” blah blah but i really don’t care, i will judge you 😂. Just call me Sergeant Candice-Stan

Grant has done some nice things for Candice that we know about and probably even more that we don’t which would be great if it weren’t for the fact that he has done so much shit that was downright ugly and unnecessary. It’s not just a ‘remember that one time…” type of thing, which would be bad enough, it’s a “remember that time Grant liked that comment from a Iris hater? Or remember that time he lied about a photoshoot with Candice? Oh, wait, what about that time he re-arranged his Top 9 on Instagram (which we didn’t even know was fucking possible) just so that the Westallen wedding poster wouldn’t be immortalized as his most popular post that year”?

We could literally keep going because over the course of eight years we have far too many examples of Grant being a shitty costar to someone who desperately, desperately needed a supportive one. His behavior would have been bad enough, period, no matter who his costar was but when you think about the fact that Candice already had to deal with so much bullshit to begin with it’s absolutely infuriating that his actions we’re an added, unnecessary burden. He decides to like a comment from a hater on Thanksgiving and then clumsily tries to fix it to save his own ass and all be manages to do is draw attention to the fact that it looks like he’s agreeing with some troll that Candice needs to lose her job which in turn just gave haters even more ammunition to use against her.

So, yeah, it was nice that he pushed for Westallen to happen but it’s thoroughly disappointing that he couldn’t keep that energy when it came to promoting and supporting the couple and his costar. And now we’ve reached the stage where not only does he not promote or support the couple but he half-asses his scenes 90% of the time too. 😒

[meadowsopranostoriamosposter]

Weirdest night ever. Was camping in state forest..there were a decent amount of people out and about camping bc long weekend so I wasn’t particularly concerned about safety. I’m all set up and just cooling off in my car and some guy pulls up near me and is just shooting the shit and is like do u mind if I get out and smoke a cigarette? I say no and he’s clearly like half brain dead from weed telling me he’s a botanist who’s mission it is to save humanity which really to me read as he does not have a job but his girlfriend has a job. And then he’s like I’m gonna go down to the creek and bushwhack and hopefully find some mushrooms. He asks if I ever bushwhacked and I say no I have not and he invites me to come play with him.. I politely declined and he’s like I promise I’m not a creep I’m a mountain man and you’re safe with me. I know it’s scarier for women on the road and all and I’m a man, but I have a gun in the glove compartment..why don’t you take the gun so you feel safer? SO NOW I KNOW HE HAS A GUN (and I’m quite frankly still not that concerned because I saw that it wasn’t loaded also this guy was so stoned and dumb worst case scenario I’d hit him and run back to my car and book it while calling 911), but still I’m like I guess it’s better that I have the gun right? So we go to the creek and hit stuff with sticks which is fun and I tell him I’m tried and we walk back to where we parked. He takes out a big mason jar of Psilocybin mushrooms in honey with some crystals floating around and takes a weird knife out of his pocket and starts eating this mixture with a knife like whinnie the poo. He offers me some and I obviously said no and he offers me a place to stay in his teepee and I say no thank you got my tent all set up for the night. Then he tells me that there are “inbreds who kill people” in the forest and that I’d be safe with him and I tell him I’ll take my chances and he says ok and asks if I have a knife to defend myself and I say yes but he says here your knife probably sucks take mine, drop it off at my teepee on your way out and I say ok great thanks. I slept in my car with no issues lmao. And he wasn’t at his teepee in the morning so I call the phone number on a poster he gave me of some like. White Rastafarian local music festival (idk) to see if it was his number and it wasn’t but a woman picked up and knew who I was talking about and gave me his number. I called him asking if he wanted me to drop his knife off and he didn’t reply but anyway close call girls

[marimopeace]

d. gray-man still fucks me up...

in the best of ways, even after all these years plus breaks on my end as a fan and hoshino's circumstances.

loved all things gothic and fantasy in middle school to escape my life via power-wielding teens (i.e. 07-ghost, pandora hearts, soul eater, karneval, hakkenden, etc.) and d.gray-man was huge for me since i was still in a phase where i was binging all the long anime series i could since it gave my attn span something to latch onto and be immersed in for a good amount of time. tbh i can't tell if my attn span has gotten even shorter considering i usually substitute streaming social media videos over tv nowadays or better since i'm able to better sustain interests in specific niche things?

i switched to consuming content on a more seasonal basis in high school but i became more of a manga reader so at the time i was still on the nose for the rare new d.gray-man chapter. i was so excited for when hallow was announced! i think the hallow promo visuals + posters were some of the last things i shared on my old tumblr blog actually lmao. didn't love hallow as a show but i loved it for what it brought back to me in terms of bringing hoshino's drawings to life via sound + color and seeing ppl turn into fans via gifs in comment sections. that's part of the reason why the furuba reboot meant a lot to me too tbh! always so nice when you can see new and old fans come together to show artists the love they deserve <3

took a break from d.gray-man specifically since the searching for a.w. arc was just a lot for me to take in chapter by chapter since it was hard to keep track of intricate plot details without needing to re-read some chapters for every release and that's not how i enjoy content personally. and i guess from there life just kind of ? came and went? college + growing up in general with new life obligations have changed the way i pursue entertainment aha.

i don't know what switched it on but i ended up spending this past weekend going through everything from scratch! i haven't sat down to marathon 100+ chapters/episodes of anything in a long time since i either keep up with shorter serials now or keep up with things on a monthly basis and wowwww the immersion hit different this time fr XD i swear i felt like a kid again!

but wow going through the entire manga + anime bit by bit from my new position in life really made me appreciate hoshino's storytelling a lot more; it's not so much that the plot of d.gray-man aged well, but that the whole series works together to tell one of the most cohesive stories i've seen for a fantasy shonen (esp with such a young protagonist--allen is the age of a high school sophomore!!!!!! a literal child!!!! someone be on his side kthxJohnny).

when i say i went through bit by bit i MEAN IT i fully had a list of episodes via wikipedia out and i was going through chapter arcs as they were recreated in the old anime series i went in completely XD god i'm crazy.

but it felt so sweet and so wonderful to dive into the adventure head-on.

i'm trying to do the same with the hallow sequel but reading/watching d.gray-man like this is really making me see how rushed it was ^^; it's taking more chapters to get to where each episode of hallow ends and i get why hoshino was so peeved with both shows now to be honest for the out of order details or skipping of content.

i'm also really resonating with hoshino's anger towards TMS for the hallow promo materials and i get why she went as far as to shoot their bank accounts in the foot bc the way i started tearing up during hallow episode 6 with talk of the lotus, flashbacks, and the hand reaching up to the sky....ㅠㅠ #bigoop

kanda shouldn't have been shoved into a yaoi narrative for the sake of money (nor allen esp considering his age) since it completely goes against his character arc and everything he is with alma. i'm getting so fucked up by their past lives' love story and their current again like when i say the tears i'm shedding come from something so old and deep inside of me ㅠㅠ (oh lorde it's so sad!!)

i had to pause my marathon since i spent my monday without wifi bc of a storm in my area and it'll prob be a while until i can finish re-reading/watching until the end of hallow. i'm excited to read new saying goodbye to a.w chapters though! i know it'll definitely be worth waiting these past few years <3 seeing allen's character growth as he matured as a "destroyer who saves" and how he grapples w mana's influence is fascinating and exploring the nitty-gritty of the morality that pervades the Black Order is just! ugh love this kind of worldbuilding with strong characters sm

planning this next content binge will be tricky though since i meant to catch up on the furuba reboot before it ends next week...welp i'll see how this goes ^^;

// time to get to writing this thesis marimo! //

[signals-over-the-air]

did someone say avengers pride hc’s?

@papesdontsellthemselves and I have been working on this for a while and we’re very proud of it, go check out the complimentary hc’s he posted here!

(also let us know if you want more avengers hc’s cuz dear god we have so many, we have a 13 page google doc and we’re nowhere near done)

(this is very disorganized im sorry in advance but pls enjoy)

Steve Rogers goes fucking hard to Lip Gloss by Lil Mama and while the Avengers are all on their Pride Float at NYC Pride, Bucky gets him to twerk to it

Likewise, Bucky goes hard to Hollaback Girl (the plague version or the original, you choose) and ALSO twerks to that on the float

C’mon I mean those supersoldier ass and thighs Don’t Lie (Tony’s words not mine)

AT PRIDE BUCKY AND STEVE RECREATE THAT WW2 KISS PIC AND CONFETTIS FALLING ALL AROUND THEM AND STEVE IS CRADLING BUCK’S HEAD WITH THE RAINBOW FLAG CLUTCHED IN HIS GRIP AND YAH I’M FUCKING EMO OK

OKay let’s get into OUTFITS

Steve is in rainbow suspenders and booty shorts with no shirt (and an obscene amount of body glitter as per Nat’s insistence)

And Bucky’s in a crop top and booty shorts (it’s a white crop top that says ‘be proud’ written in a bi gradient with a bi-flag-colored heart right under it) (his booty shorts are just like cut off jeans with the pockets painted rainbow and bi colors)

WHITE CONVERSE AND PRIDE SOCKS WHITE CONVERSE WITH PRIDE SOCKS WHITE CONVERSE WITH PRIDE SOCKS

He does silver glitter around his eyes, like the winter soldier paint but make it gay

Steve’s wearing his flag as a cape and Bucky’s wearing his sort of rolled up and artfully tied around his waist (Enjolras style, iykyk)

But believe me, it took awhile for them to get anywhere near comfy enough for that level of expression. The first year they went together, they blended into the crowds and were in like cargo shorts and plain t shirts it was a time

One year, a little girl gave Bucky a bi flag and he put it in his man bun (and cried a little. So did steve. They didn’t mention it.)

Steve’s got bi color themed eyeblack

People coming up to Steve and Buck and telling them that their coming out gave them the courage to come out

Steve paints the star on Bucky’s arm pride colors every year and he keeps that all through pride month

For the parade itself, Steve paints a whole ass mural on his arm

Bucky loves it because, “It symbolizes love not death”

One year he painted pride body art on BUcky and Bucky literally almost refused to shower for like a week

The year they’re finally comfy enough to go on the float, Bucky’s kissing Steve with a flag thrust above his head and Steve’s not crying he’s not

Steve and Tony are the poster boys for bi/pan solidarity

Tony is wearing a pan flag crop top with light blue overalls over it, ft. white converse and body glitter

Peter is a Bi Icon and he’s got a short sleeve button down (artfully unbuttoned) and cuffed jeans and bi socks and yah

The Allies (Rhodey, Sam, and Pepper) all are Super Fucking Supportive and have the ally flag on their cheeks and they’re VIBING they’re so proud of their friends

So ok so Clint and Bucky both can SING and they do a cover of Girls/Girls/Boys and it BLOWS UP on TIKTOK and Brendon Urie duets it (freaking the fuck you because asdlkfjalsdkfjlakdj avengers)

So naturally, at Pride, the three of them perform together

Tony goes FERAL he’s so jealous

Tony lights up Avengers tower with pride colors for all of June

Clint’s got a pride guitar that Tony made him and at the end of the song, Clint smashes it on impulse and bc Tony expected that it repaired itself

Clint was so pleased it was ridiculous

PICTURE TIME

The year Cap officially came out all the Captain America fireworks were rainbow on July 4th

Peter posts a selfie of him, Steve, and Bucky being dumb while decked out in bi pride gear on his insta story and the internet breaks

Sam and Rhodey take a cute pic of them holding up the ally flag over Tony and Steve, who are each holding up one end of a rainbow flag and laughing

There’s a picture of Pepper kissing Tony’s cheek as Morgan (who’s on Tony’s shoulders) holds a flag up and laughs

Later that night when the avengers are vibing on the roof of the tower, Nat posts a picture of Steve and Buck making a hand-heart (their hands are painted in bi colors) and kissing as the sun sets behind them

Someone gets a pic as the avengers are all preparing for pride of Peter asking Tony if he likes his outfit and Tony is grinning and ruffling peter’s hair its ADORABLE

Clint doing a death drop is giffed and immediately goes viral

At the Avengers-only rooftop after party there’s a shot of the original 6 avengers up against the railing together, just after the sun has set, backs to the camera, but all clearly so comfortable and happy with each other?? steve has his elbow on tony’s shoulder, tony has his arm around bruce, bruce has one arm around tony and is kinda leaning on thor, thor has an arm around Nat, who’s laughing as she shoves a cackling clint away from her

🏳️‍🌈happy pride!🏳️‍🌈 I hope everyone has a good day and this provides a little reprieve from the chaos of our current world :)💕💕 keep yourself safe!

[2018shawn]

a small, quick write based on a concept me and @cumholland​ were talking about aka tom being obsessed with naming your unborn child

the day you found out you were pregnant, not only were your excited, but also shit scared terrified of carrying a little human, who literally depended on you for everything. two hours into the discovery, tom was already talking about names because he felt bad for calling him/her “the bub”. unbeknown to you, he’d ordered not one... not two... not three... but four baby name books, next day delivery, because he couldn’t think (nor spell) to save his life and he already had a name on the tip of his tongue, but he’d be damned if he could get the prefect fitting. 

what else you didn’t know, is that he’d ordered the books to your name, so when he’d left for work the next morning and you received the package, your eyebrows knitted together and hands immediately got to work on unwrapping the brown package. you couldn’t help the single tear that left your eye as you studied each individual book, opening each book to a random page and picking a random name each time. 

you opened your text conversation to tom, typing the four names you’d let your eyes fall over automatically. it was a while before he replied, but that was normal, considering he was a ridiculously busy movie star with a schedule busier than the moon. but when he did reply, your heart warmed at the names he’d returned, although, you were sure anything he said could make your heart flutter and knees fall weak.

when you got to 12 weeks, you both decided it was more than safe enough for you to officially declare yourself pregnant. the news soon spread far and wide, your friends, family and fans soon learning of the information and the incoming tweets, messages and instagram dm’s soon filled your phone, almost half of them being a suggestion of names. as you and tom sat on the sofa one cosy saturday evening, pizza on your legs and tessa giving the best puppy dog eyes, you started to scroll through the infinite amount of messages whilst suggesting the best choices aloud to tom.

“verity?” you asked, picking all the pepperoni off you pizza, even though you specifically asked for it.

“eh.... kinda old fashioned.” he shrugged, his sweat shorts riding high up his thighs and grey nike sweat top clinging to his body perfectly. it was then, you realised, there was no wonder how you got so pregnant so quick.

“okaaaaay...” you scrolled through more, screwing your face up at some suggestions until you landed on another that caught your eye. 

“sophie?”

“nope.”

you sighed, grunting until you found another name. “harper?”

“like the instrument?” he asked, picking the discarded pepperoni from your cardboard box and throwing it into his mouth. 

you took that as a no, although you weren't sure if he was being serious. “alfie?”

he was silent for a small while, letting himself finish the spiced pepperoni before washing it down with a neck full of beer. nodding, you could tell he was genuinely thinking about it, as if he was spelling out alfie holland in his head, just like you were. the last bite of his stuffed crust drove you insane, and it was almost like your baby’s name depended on this very decision. “alfie thomas holland.” 

that saturday night, four weeks ago, was the last time you and tom had talked about baby names and you thought that was okay, you wasn’t putting any pressure on it. 16 weeks in, your baby the size of an avocado (apparently), tom had to fly across the pacific pond for some work stuff and you hated every minute of saying goodbye. he hated it even more. he hated when he had to say goodbye, even when you weren't pregnant, but now you were carrying a mini tom, he fought with everything he had in him to not leave the country although his pleads were denied. tommy, it’s okay. you assured him, we’ll both be here waiting for you. you’d said, watching him walk away with his lonely suitcase as he boarded the plane. that was all it took for you too pull your phone out and send the message. 

two days into tom’s work trip, you were knee deep in contracts and invoices that your boss had sent, with firm instruction that they all must be completed by the time the sun sets. tom was sat in a beauty chair, gushing to his hair stylist how perfect of a mum you’ll be, while you poured yourself a fifth cup of tea. you’d forgotten what a personal phone is, you’d forgotten what daylight looks like and you’d forgotten you were meant to be eating for two, letting the occasional lunch slip your mind. it was nothing new when you email notification sounded, the ping filling the room and making you roll your eyes, yet again. although, further research into the new email made your heart flutter and mouth smile, fully aware it was not from your boss, or let alone, any work colleague.

what about isaac for a boy?

or

evangeline for a girl?

love you soooooOooOooOOoOoO much

ps remember to eat

as a well known instagram poster, it was when you decided to go live that you decided tom was a total doofus, as if you hadn’t considered that summary beforehand. speaking to the zillion and one incoming messages, you answered as many questions as you could, trying to ignore the blue tick that kept appearing in the comments, bold capital letters threatening to take over the screen.

EMMA

IRIS

HUNTER

HANG ON...

NIKKI

BC MY MUM

in the midst, was a thousand and one people commenting how cute he was, only spurring him on to comment more names and as much as you tired to ignore it, you couldn’t. it was hard to answer any normal questions, your entire feed flooded with baby names and comments about tom and of course you weren’t mad, by any stretch of the imagination, but for once you though instagram might pull you back into normal life.

MARIE

LIKE THAT CAT

you finally gave in one night, agreeing to join tom at one of his live interviews and although you wouldn’t be appearing on the screen as such, you felt nervous for being in front of such a large audience and crew. tom had stayed with you as much as he could, before hair and make up beckoned him but even then, you stayed with harrison, who was able to calm you nerves and keep your mind occupied. 

tom, of course, appeared on the guest sofa looking like a complete snack as always, leaving you pining behind the camera. it began with many questions about the film, but when the guests had drunk a couple of sips of whiskey, the collars started to loosen and questions started to flow.

“so, tom, we have a name generator....” the host pulled out a fish bowl, full of folded up pieces of paper. “and we think, whatever you pull out you should name your unborn child...”

tom immediately looked for you, finding you just behind the camera man with a shocked, but amused expression. when you nodded, tom knew it was more than acceptable for him to play along, giving everyone what they wanted. his hand dipped deep into the bowl as he secretly wished for a name that he hoped would not only be super cute, but one that you'd already chosen together. he pulled out a single paper, the crowd and host on the edge of their sit as he unfolded. 

“thomas jr... really?!”

tom taglist: @imaginashawnns @fallinallincurls  @mendesficsxbombay @cosmicholland

also thank u to @shawnsmoose​ for providing my drunk ass with names lmao

[ickle-ronniekins]

heart on your sleeve, george x reader

request: from anon: “Can we have a super fluffy George story with these prompts? “Am I bothering you?” “What’s the magic word?” “Can I be honest with you?” I’m so in love with your writing!!!” | omg, STOP. this made my day! thank you for your kind words, i can’t even stand it, i love writing for you guys and missed it so much—it’s people like you that keep me motivated! i smiled like a goof when i received these prompts...i hope you like it darling!! also oops this is kind of long i got carried away, yiiiiikes

prompts: “am i bothering you?”, “what’s the magic word?”, “can i be honest with you?”

warnings: the inability to deal w anything bc weasley men are perf

The Great Hall

Clank! A box hit the table with a loud noise and I nearly jumped out of my seat. Many students from the other tables look our way, but quickly went back to their dinner. I was busy biting into a piece of chicken, when two lanky redheads sat down on either side of me.

“Just two more days,” the first said, “Until we finally see—”

“—who the real Hogwarts champion is!”

Their enthusiasm was welcomed, but they seemed to be a little too excited about the upcoming Triwizard Tournament challenges. “First off, it’s a lot longer than two more days,” I told them and watched as their smiles drooped. “Secondly, how d’you know it’ll be a Hogwarts champion? Fleur Delacour could take home the entire bloody tournament, or Krum, perhaps? Don’t put all your sickles in one basket, boys.”

Fred and George were silent a moment. I thought that maybe, maybe I’d finally gotten the last word in, but of course I was wrong. They both began animatedly chatting about the first challenge.

“How could you even think that, Y/N?”

“It’s definitely going to be either Harry or Cedric,”

“Those tosspots from the other schools don’t even stand a chance,”

“Hogwarts is the superior wizarding school!”

I swatted their hands and said, “Oh hush, would you? Your allegiance towards Hogwarts is truthfully beautiful, boys, but I’d rather not have a Durmstrang pick a fight with either one of you because you swore your truth so bloody loud.”

They ignored this and continued on. To me, Fred said, “D’you want to place bets with us?”

“Yeah, for the upcoming challenges!” George chimed in.

I looked at their box on the table. It had already been halfway filled, and many students were peering at the twins excitedly. I’m sure everyone was just as enthralled with the idea of placing bets on who’d win each challenge, let alone the entire Triwizard Tournament. The goblet was sitting atop a pedestal at the front of the Great Hall where the professors were chatting animatedly about the tournament, no doubt, and delving into the delicious feast in front of them.

I shut the box, and Fred and George glanced at one another before turning their attention back towards me. “Can we eat first?”

“Absolutely not,” Fred said. “This is important business to take care of, Y/N! We only have so much time!”

George poked me in the ribs and I couldn’t help but laugh. “Quit it,” I told him, but he wouldn’t stop. I nearly knocked over my entire plate of food, but I didn’t really care that much. “Knock it off,”

George didn’t stop. “Am I bothering you? Say the magic woooord!” he sang, completely sarcastic by the sounds of it. He finally gave in when he saw tears forming in my eyes from laughing so hard, and I had regained enough composure to point towards the food.

The twins groaned in unison. “Fine,” George said. “But you’re not getting out of this that easy, Y/N.”

I took a scoop full of mashed potatoes and plopped it down onto his plate. “Eat up, Georgie.”

The First Challenge, After

The Gryffindor common room was absolutely buzzing. The surprise of the real life dragons on Hogwarts grounds had died down a bit, and everyone was now focused on Harry defeating his and preparing for the next challenge. Fred and George had hoisted Harry up onto their arms while the common room cheered. The fire roared, and butterbeer was being passed around in large amounts to warm everyone up from their day in the cold. I was able to snag an armchair that had been left unattended, and I felt a body sit down next to me. I could almost hear his smile. “Having a day, aren’t you?”

“A bloody good one at that,” George gulped down some of his butterbeer. The tip of his nose was still pink from being outside and he wrapped his hands tightly around his cup. “Any thought of joining us in placing our bets?”

“I dunno, George,” I told him truthfully. “You two are sort of ripping off all the first and second years, aren’t you?” I winked.

He scoffed. “Ripping them off? Hardly, darling. We’re merely teaching them early. You can never start too young. Listen, just say the word, and you’re in. Truthfully, I think Freddie’s going to lose. He is putting all of his sickles into one basket. I’m taking your advice, though—I kind of think maybe one of the other two will take the entire tournament.”

“Oh yeah?” I asked, now completely enthralled. Next to me, the fire was raging. “And who’re you thinking will win this?”

George thought for a moment. “Maybe Krum—he was bloody brilliant at the Quidditch World Cup.”

Someone began to blast music from the other side of the common room. It was the late hours of the evening now, and while my four poster seemed rather inviting, I knew I wouldn’t be able to get any sleep with this celebration going on. He watched as Harry lifted up the golden egg, his eyes sparkling. I suddenly felt a strong wave of empathy towards him.

“I know you wanted to enter,” I said, remembering his and Fred’s ingenious plan of tricking the goblet with their aging potion. I thought about how terrifying the first task was, and I was just as nervous for number two. It felt better to have George next to me in the stands instead of out in the pitch, battling a dragon. “But I’m kind of glad you couldn’t.”

He looked at me quizzically, and then grinned a little—however, he still seemed confused. “Why?”

My heart began to beat, thinking of either him or Fred out there, doing these dangerous tasks—getting hurt, losing—or worse. “Because, I couldn’t handle either of you out there!” I exclaimed. “That would be horrible! I genuinely do not understand how your brother or Hermione are dealing with Harry being in this tournament. If it was either of you two, truthfully, I dunno if I’d be able to watch—I mean, you’re my best friends! I’d rather have you next to me, spectating.”

George’s cheeky grin softened, and I could tell that I touched him in a way. It was a small, intimate moment, when his twin came in and ended it abruptly.

“Y/N...that is just the absolute sweetest thing I have ever heard. Hear that, Georgie? She just couldn’t handle us being out there,”

I rolled my eyes. Fred plopped down on the floor beside me and began to poke at my shoes. He continued to laugh, and more and more students came over to sit by us and wanted to place more bets with the twins. And although George was now tangled up in his business, he kept throwing me glances and those soft smiles and I felt a twinge in my heart. I knew it had meant more to him then he let on, what I said. His eyes were glistening with a new type of confidence and passion that I knew just couldn’t be from the bets.

The Yule Ball, After

By Christmas Eve night, the grounds were covered in a few inches of snow. It continued to fall softly—not in a blustery sort of way—all day long, creating a beautiful blanket of white. Everyone had been bustling around like crazy all day long—doing their best to try and get ready for the Yule Ball in an orderly fashion. I wasn’t too concerned.

The night absolutely flew by. It started out with a gorgeous dance in a magnificently decorated Great Hall, followed by dinner and dessert. After that, the real party had begun. Students of Hogwarts, Durmstrang, and Beauxbatons had finally all come together despite their differences and the rest of the impending tournament. After a while, it had become rather stuffy and sweaty in there—I just had to get out.

I wrapped my shawl around me and made my way for the doors. The cool, wintry air hit my skin with force, but it felt wonderful. I sat on a nearby bench and watched as the snow fell lightly to the ground. It was still and silent. Suddenly, I heard footsteps. I tugged at my shawl and pulled it tighter around my shoulders when George stepped into view.

“Hey,” he made his way over towards me. “What’re you doing out here? It’s freezing.”

“Just needed to step away for a moment,” I told him. “This night has been a whirlwind! Just needed some fresh air.” He sat down next to me and I let my shawl fall off of my shoulders. I turned towards him and asked, “Hey, how did it go with that Beauxbatons girl Freddie was trying to get you to dance with? Did she place any bets?” I winked.

He peered at me with a sparkle in his eye. His demeanor was calmer than usual, which was strange to me—he and his brother were always doing this or that, going somewhere or planning something next. But here, in the snow, on Christmas Eve, he was sitting here, completely relaxed and content, no plans in sight.

“Can I be honest with you?” he asked me.

I was sort of taken off guard. Nearby, a couple was twirling in the snow, sharing kisses in the moonlight and the snowflakes. I turned back towards George. “Of course you can.”

“I don’t care about that Beauxbatons girl,” he told me truthfully. “I only care about you. I was going to ask you to this, you know, as a date...but you were so set on the two of us and Freddie going as a group, I didn’t want to stomp all over your plans,” he chuckled lightly. Snowflakes were melting atop his eyelashes now and his red hair looked fiery against the backdrop of the pearl white snow. He peered at me solemnly. “I don’t think I’d be able to handle you being out there either—you know, in the tournament.”

My heart raced. Bloody finally. It’d taken me years of strict concentration to not wear my heart on my sleeve in front of him. It didn’t work very well, though. Fred had figured it out almost immediately, and I made him swear not to say anything. Either George knew, but didn’t tell me, or Fred really did keep his promise and George genuinely could not tell that I’d always been mad for him. It didn’t really matter, in the end. I placed my hand on top of his and glanced at his watch. After midnight. It was Christmas Day. “I reckon there’s time for one more dance. Care to join me?”

George stood up and took my hand. “As long as you promise not to step on my feet,” he winked.

“Oh, now what’s the fun in that?” I asked him teasingly. “It’s Christmas! Your first present—an absolutely terribly awkward dance with me. C’mon, I promise you’ll love it.”

The Great Hall was nearly empty, which gave me an excess amount of room to trip and stumble, no doubt. George wrapped his arms around my waist and began to twirl me. “This is a pretty good Christmas gift,” he said, and placed a light kiss on top of my nose. I could feel my cheeks turn rosy and warm—the same way my insides felt when he leaned in close to me and continued, “In fact—the best.”

[ask-svt-hearteu]

Vampire! Joshua

Genre/Warnings: fluff, historically incorrect probably, mentions of religion that are purely because of this supernatural au, cursing

Word Count: 2278

A/N: surprise :p i was kinda feeling inspired bc this is a superior concept sorry it’s not a request :( but i really hope you guys like this! it’s been a minute since i’ve written something, i hope i portrayed joshua correctly too - admin seri

1800s poster church boy

until he fell in love 

or so he thought 

he was strumming his guitar at choir practice 

sitting at the side while the nun yelled at the girls, a usual day at the church

and he looked up at the sound of the doors opening and saw her

immediately he’s fascinated by things he’s never cared about before 

it was like just the flutter of her lashes made him swoon

poor unsuspecting Joshua Hong, didn’t he know what compulsion was 

for a month after, people said he changed 

he quit choir and began chasing after this one girl 

as were many other men, as they were all too blinded by the compulsion to realize, him included 

but she liked him best, it was the only explanation, because why else would she

he remembers that night, dressed in a tux as her date to one of the many balls she was invited too

being pulled into one of the many secluded rooms by the tug of her nimble fingers on his tie 

feeling the soft touch of her lips 

feeling the pain of her teeth sinking into his bottom lip

she seemed to take great amusement in watching him pull back in horror 

she bit down on her own lip, hard

he watched, horrified as the blood dripped from her lips while she smirked

and she kissed him again in his frozen state

next thing he knew he was laying on his bed with a terribly sore neck 

left with only a short, vivid scene of her baring her fangs and wrapping her hands around his neck 

she was gone and so was the compulsion

he looked into the mirror, ran his hands over the puncture wounds on his neck, and hissed at the pain of a new set of teeth growing

it didn’t take long for him to realize he needed to escape town 

it also didn’t take long for him to meet another vampire

Choi Seungcheol offered him an understanding smile and handed him a ring 

from then on, he was with Seventeen 

becoming a vampire killed any belief Joshua had in god

he was even the ‘I've read the entire bible five’ type, but then again what else was there really to do

there wasn’t much he could say about the topic now, the evidence was clear 

however, his knowledge made him the absolute perfect candidate for his role in Seventeen

because where there’s a small, close-knit town, there’s a church

prominent members of the community reside in the church 

and they know all the dirty secrets

all he was to do was wiggle his way into the church slowly as the young, pleasant man offering to play the guitar during mass 

getting along with all the kids

become the major’s kid favorite 

shaking hands with the major as he grins ‘shyly’ when the major dotes on how much the kid loves him 

sly, sly Joshua 

his job, primarily, is to make sure none of the town leaders catch on to the recent rise in animal deaths 

and that no other vampires left any loose ends or some people suspicious

and especially make sure as hell there aren’t any vampire hunters

so he’s at choir practice with a guitar at his side, smiling softly at the nostalgic sight of the kids singing

til he smells a familiar scent in the air and turns to see Jun

“What are you going here?”

smiling brightly, Junhui points, “the kid my girl babysits gets to play this weekend” 

“she’s adorable” Joshua looks to the little girl standing next to the piano bouncing on the balls of her feet 

“yeah I am,” Jun’s girlfriend buts in cheekily, “thanks Josh” 

he hums nonchalantly, “no problem” 

while the three of them settle to watch the practice, Jun leans in and whispers, “so any updates?” 

“one lady, she’s on the council and is always asks me about our living situation whenever we talk. it’s obvious she’s skeptical. I overheard her talking about the deer Vernon forgot to bury last week too”

“are you going to compel her to stop?” 

he shakes his head, “no, she’s been so adamant, it’ll be too suspicious if she suddenly stops caring” 

“what are we going to do?” 

he shrugs and gives a reassuring smile, “I’ll figure it out” 

later that evening, he finds himself at a council member’s dinner party 

the amount of dinner parties Joshua has been to is astonishing, it really felt like they had nothing better to do with their lives 

so in his dress shirt and slacks, he greets everyone with a shake of the hand or a polite hug

secretly wanting to just down ten glasses of champagne because that’s how utterly unlikable the council members are

managing to escape, he finds himself in one of the many hallways of the mansion and spots a lone figure 

Joshua watches as you examine the picture frames in close detail, as if you were looking as to see what color shoes each person was wearing 

slowly, he takes light steps towards you, standing behind to take a look at the frames himself 

you feel a strange sensation, like that unexplainable feeling that you’re being watched

so you turn your head

“Jesus fuck!” 

you stumble a couple steps away from him

how could you not even hear his footsteps

despite your loud exclamation, he remains cool and only smirks 

“saying God’s name in vain?” he shakes his head mockingly 

you huff, gathering your composure, “I wouldn’t be if you weren’t being so creepy” 

seeing him simply shrug and turn back to the frames, you scowl

“who even cares about that anyways,” you mutter under your breath

“never said I did,” he smiles at you calmly

a very unmannerly snort rises from you, “geez you just keep getting creepier and creepier” 

he chuckles, “Joshua Hong, nice you meet you. you can call me Josh.”

how he hasn’t been the slightest put off by your unfriendliness, you don’t know

“Y/N L/N” 

for the first time, you take him in, finally noticing how insanely handsome he is

in fact, he seems perfect

seeing as you let a little bit of your guard down, Joshua asks, “so tell me about the pictures”

“if you really want to know, Joshua“ you tease, emphasizing the ‘ua’, “this is my family” 

he looks at your impassive expression, noticing the way your tone becomes lifeless when you talk about them 

“this is your house?” 

you smile bitterly, “yeah, it’s nice right?” 

shaking his head he exhales, “I don’t know seems kind of lonely” 

you eye him with a look of surprise and he laughs 

“I live with twelve other guys and I think that’s the only way you could fill a house like this” 

seeing you crack a smile, he grins triumphantly 

“twelve guys? that’s an odd arrangement” 

“it works” 

lifting his finger, Joshua points to one of the pictures, “where’s this at?” 

“the woods just outside of town, that’s my family and the major’s family camping, we go every year” 

finally getting to what he came here for, Joshua says, “you guys probably heard of all the animal deaths in the forest then huh” 

you sigh dramatically, “not you too, seems like the whole council is obsessed with it these days” 

“oh?” 

oh fuck

the chances of this town knowing about vampire seems very high

in a town where a couple families have been in control since forever, those families passed down the secrets

he’d have to ask Wonwoo for more history

“I can’t believe my parents are making me join the council, I don’t know what about turning twenty-one suddenly allows me to handle city politics” 

he makes a note of that and chuckles, “mmm yeah, seems more like a clubbing night instead of an inauguration”

you reach and nudge his arm naturally, “that’s what i’m saying!” 

“another thing also,” Joshua raises his brows amused and tilts his head towards the champagne glass in your hand

“what are you a saint,” you can’t help but smile, “okay holy one, take it from me” 

he almost bursts into laughter at the irony

simply just clinking your glass with his, his eyes sparkle with a playful gleam, “cheers” 

after getting your number, which you will never admit you happily gave him, you both start to talk

from daily conversations simply about each others day 

to both of you dying when the conversation leads somewhere completely random 

you honestly just think, like wow, when has your adult dating life ever been this successful 

but Joshua, when he first found out about you and your family, his only thought was how useful the information you had could be 

though he’s being honest with himself, you had him since that dinner party

not head over heels compulsion type of attraction

just your tough snarky demeanor, no doubt because of the way you were raised 

and the way it fell into a giggly mess meshed with sarcastic comebacks as if you weren’t just laughing your head off

and even if you pretend to be cold-hearted sometimes, you’re the first one to give someone directions or to pick up their fallen papers 

“clearly you like her” Jeonghan laughs, entertained by his close friend’s struggle

“I know that much” he chortles, “Y/n likes me too” 

“and you haven’t made a move because? there’s only so many coffee runs and choir practices you guys can use as an excuse” 

Joshua stares into the moon from his spot on the rooftop, realizing it must’ve past midnight by now 

“today is Y/n’s birthday, they’re going to tell her today” 

“well didn’t she invite you to her dinner party?” 

his lips twitch remembering you ranting about it to him, complaining about the formalities of it all, how you really didn’t want all the council members and their snotty kids, no matter how cute, at your twenty-first birthday

you had reached over and tapped his arm, letting your hand graze against him, “looks like it’s your job to make it worthwhile” 

arriving at your mansion, he’s dressed in his best suit and clutching a bouquet of flowers

he can smell your distinct perfume getting closer and closer to the door and smiles softly when you pause in front for a few moments

you’re feeling just as nervous as he is

“Josh” you greet, finally taken to calling him by his nickname

“you look lovely” he says warmly

he reaches for your hand, bringing it up his lips tenderly and presses a kiss

eyes never leaving his, you breathe deeply

“old-fashioned” you mumble, hoping your twenty-one year old self isn’t seriously blushing right now

“i prefer romantic but you’re the birthday girl” 

you glare at him playfully, “hey only i’m allowed to be cheeky today” 

he lets you lead him around the house, pointing out all the elaborate decorations your parents had set up

he really tries his best to pay attention, but the entire time all he can focus on is how he’s going to break the news of being a vampire to you

for a moment he even thought he could hear his heartbeat but stupid, his heart doesn’t beat

you ended up giving him a tour of the entire house with the pool as your last stop

grabbing his hand, successfully sending sparks up his arm, you lead him outside

he doesn’t let go 

“at least the weather is pretty today” you hum, purposely not talking about your hand in his

“looks like the guests are starting to come” 

you both can hear the sound of guests chattering and expensive cars beeping

“just let me be alone with someone a like for a moment” 

before he can show you any type of reaction you let out a tiny giggle, and use your intertwined hands to tug him closer to you

“do you like me too?” your eyes hold a teasing glint, already knowing the answer

“yes, i do like you” Joshua says firmly

you become serious at his sincere and determined expression 

“so what have we been waiting for?” 

Joshua sighs, unknowingly gripping your hand tighter

“I feel like I should tell you something first, and if it doesn’t work, I need you to forget it” 

“okay”

there were other ways where this could’ve gone smoother, but this information never is smooth anyways

“I’m a vampire”

he watches you cautiously, hoping he wouldn’t have to compel you to forget, because that would really mess with his heart

your serious expression falls into a blank one and he almost isn’t sure that it’s you gripping his hand tighter or the other way around

you let out a shaky laugh, “since when were you so dramatic” 

“what-” 

you cut him off, “that was a bit easier to process than i thought” 

 “than you thought?“ he questions incredulously

“Josh, I found out about vampires when I was 16. I was a pretty sneaky teen so do you know how funny it was for me to pretend this was new information this morning to my parents?” you grin mischievously, ignoring his dumbfounded expression

“so what about me?” 

“you Joshua Hong,” you tap him on the nose, “aren’t as subtle as you think, I’m just smarter than you I guess” 

recovering from his surprise he smirks, “all this time, I was worried about you feeling betrayed, but now I do” 

he pulls you closer, letting the hand not holding yours fall on your waist 

you roll your eyes and stare up at him, realizing how utterly smitten you are with him

“just kiss me already, and please no fangs” 

The Seventeen Vampire AU Series:

| Mingyu | Junhui | Seungcheol | Joshua |

MASTERLIST

[yuissamidare]

@codes i think i may have put this on my artblog but... Here

i guess ill start w ichi bc i always forget about him somehow like i always come up short when im making lists and im like 'oh wait shit yeah that guy’ bc im stupid n i only think of fishing trio + choro. I’m an Idiot. idk i never thought too hard on ichi bc i so rarely think about him but he looks so high its really funny i said this on main but he looks like my friend when he decided to try a weed gummy bear then started babbling about hentai then watched to watch porn with me but got mad all the intro scenes are a billion years long and started ranting about the industry but now that i think about it he looks like someone who used to send me weird shit when he was high like bad pick up lines about body parts i wish i didnt have

and thats so funny that its Ichimatsu who looks like that but also proof that hes high. but anyway!! hes really cute and im mad hes boutta ruin my reputation for my complete and utter lack of care and interest in him no matter what im mad. my friend gwyn said 'Sp lubing us up for the fuckening that is the reason why Ichi is sad in present day’ im really curious at the change like if hes trying a fake it till you make it type thing bc really emotionally exhausted or if hes just genuinely having a good time or hes puttin on a front since like. nails who stand get hammered down right??? just gotta do your best n Never Relax n i can relate to all that. but uhhh old hcs i guess

in kun ichi was the most serious! really smart but just as bad w school as the rest of them apparently but!! yeah so id think that!! ichis that guy who participates in class discussion constantly and is always willing to debate the readings, but turns in sloppy papers with typos and no a coherency or stucture or anything. he’s A+ in participation but has an average of 60% on most of the written assignments with points knocked bc of lateness then more bc its A Mess. you could ask about the prompts for one of his papers, he could babble about his position on it complete with paragraphs and footnotes but like the day before its due hes playing rpgs and watching horror movies.

his classmates think hes so smart n so intimidating. the family knows hes a hot mess. the teachers tell him he has a lot of potential but they don’t think hes applying himself. all are right. also he doesnt cheat or let people cheat off of him since hes always been about rules and boundaries and Rightness n he n jyushi were the only ones who Minded Themselves in kun

uhh jyushi!! let me talk about schoolwork again bc yeah i love jyushi so so so so much and thinking of him in a school environment is so weird i thought about it a lot n i thought about it him in kun n san and Woah!! i really really love delinquent jyushi, bc when i saw that i was like 'huh! that fits actually!!’ i love that like him and choro flip flopped completely from what i thought. his school must be so cold theyre too cheap to afford heating in the winter and in summer the acs Blast. he was so Shy and quiet and he cried and he liked to sing so i always thought that when he participated in chorus festivals hes always like right in front!! he hums a lot in class and also moves around alot bc he actually like school and people like primary trio are the types that make friends often. i wasnt supposed to talk about this yet whoops.

unlike ichi who relatively neat despite everything but has shit notes, jyushis notes are amazing and understandable and utterly illegible.

theyre covered in doodles, arrows and lines leading every which way, different colors but not like color coded n theyre not in order by date, but he opens to a random page every time yet somehow always seems to know where to find each lesson. he writes footnotes and caveats and corrections and criticisms of the teachers and random thoughts and just smears ink everywhere. sometimes his notes are on a completely different subject. the notebook itself is a horrifying mess, the front and back covers both covered in drawings and designs and falling apart, random papers shoved between the pages, coming apart at the seams, covered in stains of unknown origin. assignments are full of emoticons and informal language, and they always manage to make his teachers feel like hes smarter than they are (most likely). he does his projects the minute theyre assigned, and is finished a minute later so can talk to his friends. he loved school.

sophie told me once about how she thought was Like That was bc one of his main concerns is that he thought he had nothing that made him Jyushi n in kun she said he might have been the one who was the most concerned about having a distinctive personality and i talked about how that sorta carried over san and how he always blended in bc of how gentle and soft and push-overy he was. he was actually the and most gullible and weakest in kun so i was like :0 when i saw that and intentionally did stuff like only carry 14 yen in his pockets to be quirky but it always sorta fell flat and he was still invisible so i was like hmmmmm. and i can see how he couldve toughened up and thinking of this now!! i love that. oh im so happy. this is so much better than i ever couldve imagined ever.

totty…. i do not think he was very popular or good at school. i think he’s very decent at schoolwork but he never put much effort into it. just copies whats on the board but if the class runs out of allotted lesson time n he couldnt finish his work he just didnt do it like cram schools a pain in the ass. if he put effort hed be a star student but he just craps out whatever since hes was the laziest!! oh but something i noticed was that him and jyushi would play together often since sometime he felt overwhelmed by karamatsu a lot. also hes the money thief and scammer its great kun todo is so good. he gets shy and flustered easy too!!

but uhh yeah!! depending on the day im always like 'zaimoku love each other so much they are best friends and the perfect other halves!!’ then im like 'these mofos hate each other what the fuck is this trainwreck’ did you see their shitty small talk in the horse episode. what was that. like they are genuinely trying to communicate and are pretty easy with each other but they have nothing to say. its like when youre having a boring day at school and theres nothing to talk about with an acquaintance so you just look at the walls and go 'have you ever noticed how stupid these posters are’ then you both start reading posters aloud but you both know its not that funny and youre just doing it to waste time but you still enjoy their company you just dont want silence. thats their relationship. and i think they are just very similar in very different ways and like. the key things that make them both similar and different and the same fuck them up (like suiriku!! theyre both really similar even if it doesn’t seem like it at first which is why their compatibility in the relationship chart was so low in s1, but i saw a lot of improvement in both of their behaviours and their communication and honestly. s2 was worth it for that sophie was so happy to see her faves get along) like sometimes when you look in the mirror all the things you see are the things you dont like about yourself instead of what makes you wonderful and unique. also i didnt mean to talk about this but i guess i am.

but yeah. totty is bitter n resentful at kara during hs n karas more confused and upset at tottys behaviour in their twenties n thats bc like i said. theyre dumb. karamatsu!! i think was actually pretty popular in highschool n had a good amount of friends - i genuinely think theatre kids are well liked bc i literally know everyone in my department and im friends w a good amount of people and im not even That extroverted. my actual extrovert friends know everyone in the school by name and everyone in my department is so nice even though theres a lot of bitchiness and drama its not as bad as w other humanities studies (jesus christ humanity students outside of theatre are a hot mess.)

uh yeah n that ultimately makes totty feel a bit… betrayed? karamatsu is his partner! theyre supposed to be there for eachother! kara’s the first one to branch out, get friends etc etc and todomatsus left behind bc hes always the one playimg follow the leader and he breaks out of that once they graduate - he grows up resenting karamatsu slightly though he still cares. but this time Hes the one cancelling plans to hang out with friends instead. my friend katie put it best when, in response to me telling them this, they sent me:

'kara: totty you have so many friends now. We barely see you anymore.

totty, applying chapstick: well, I learned it from the best.’

when i told them about it. but at the time gwyn and i were babbling about possibilities and different storylines and how theres a possiblity the movie might break down into three manageable plotlines n she gave zaimoku 'popularity’ and this was me throwing out ideas but honestly. Good. (aha, the end of this scenario ended up with todo throwing hands and shoulder checking someone outside a window and then getting removed from the premise n hanging with atsushi all night after) why am i on this. shit what happened here.

uhh but yeah totty is Def someone with learned behaviours rather than being a natural extrovert honestly just look at him hes an introverted mess masquerading as a decent human being and i know full well how people like that are bc some of them have been my best friends for years n seein the new hs promos solidifies that fact bc look at him. Crybaby. He is Miniscule. A Child.

then its 'delinquent who looks like an honour student’ choro. i never studied him until sophie started liking choro n since i love sophie i wanted to take an interest in him too. n i started to think very hard about him! then gwyn planted this in me n its taken root and im just never not gonna think its great. yall see his shitty gokudo impression what a bossy lil shit. he pulled a whip on kara once and it was mad funny but also Gwyns Big Evidence for him just being the absolute worst not like a casually skips class type but a Choro was a legit a bully and really mean n sabatoged other classmates to make him look like he was 100% That Bitch. maybe not him being Mean and cruel but just an asshole who bums around, is something i really like that one a lot its been one of my faves since gwyn n i started talking about it but i just!! have a ton of other things too!!

hes a lot like karamatsu in that theyre both stupid and weird and embarrassing and they put on airs but they also!! dont try!! they talk so big and such high goals n expectations and they dont do shit bc they have so much hubris but i always talk about them bc suiriku is sophies Beloved so ill like. Not. but he acts like he’s better than all of them n forces the role of the straight man on himself because he wants to be seen as the responible, level headed one even if hes just. So Much.

i think the movies calling back to how touchy feely and clingy he was in kun and adding on to how jyushis a delinquent and kara… Is Like That he’ll be around them the most bc jyushi might either be really protective or push him away and then they do something to mend their relationship later on or hell cling to kara and they just. grow apart. sticking to my hc until the end bitches. oh.

for choro… personally!! i thought hed be a slacker instead of a delinquent but not in the way totty slacked - totty was lazy n knew the work but didnt want to put in effort but choro just. Doesnt. choro has so much energy all the time and choro Can Not deal with school situations. bc like… you always hear people say that studying is meant to be done at the desk, silently, no distractions what so ever!! focus on notes and nothing else!! ise a highlighter but dont use it too much!! make your notes legible but you only have five minutes before the board gets erased!! review!!! look at your notes or youll die! take breaks bit dont take too long and honestly. listen. kun choro wouldnt be able to stand that shit and id think hed just think he was doing it The Wrong Way n he just wasnt meant to do it.

he doesnt like quiet classrooms!! he cant study like that and hell get distracted. he cant sit still n thats why totoko broke up w him in the beer ad and why hes just Everywhere in kun!! hes understimulated and its just Ugh! you know??? he’ll fidget w his pens until he breaks them or hum or tap his foot and annoy everyone or leave for the bathroom at least three times a class just to get up and move.

eventually he just. gives up even though hes super smart he like, stops caring bc if you dont care to understand material then you wont have to read and read and reread and rereread something to get it! classes just make everything uncomphrehensible and makes any idea he may have sublimate into nothing. but he can work on the trains and the buses! he needs something kenetic to get him moving and trains n shit always have enough going on to work with, just like with home!! chorochoro motherfuckers. he works much better moving forward, ironic as that is. he feels sorta set apart from every thing like hes behind some big plane of glass doing everything wrong and being all set apart from everything. eventually he takes to acting like a real fussy mom to avoid his own problems and help everyone else out even though hes annoying and even when he graduates but it gets Worse bc then figures out how much!!! he fucked up!! then he kicks himself into high gear n still cant do shit. ahh.

its illegal for me to talk about choukei bc i talk about them so much and im always being annoying n typing stupid essays about them bc theyre… my faves.. But this is so long…

it actually makes me super happy that he kara acne he still can be really fighty and he cries and he still does stupid impulsive shit for others and even though hes really sweet and caring is still an utter monster and fucking mess of a person. love him. i always like to think his shittymatsu nickname came from iyami n it just morphed from there bc in 66 you can hear iyami calling him specifically garbage. ive always been glad they kept his sewing hobby too. ahh, actually from what i see hes pretty similarities to kun so i wonder when he decided to air out that teremity. idk what to say about him that i havent in tottys section. he just Feels like someone who had a good support group and nice friends bc of how hes able to move in the world. kara feels like some whos doing their growing up in their twenties bc highschool came easy to them and now theyre just really struggling with the real world. like i shouldve expected softboy hs kara and i appreciate him very much!! i talk about choukei a lot bc they were the first characters that spoke so i immediately attached myself to them n i talk about karamatsu Specifically but im not sure i ever mentioned how much i appreciated how smart and cautious hes proved himself to be time and time again, like how hes the only one to point out totokos fish shtick aint doing her favours or how he was the first one to notice osos irritation n how you can pick out his voice warning jyushi to calm down in the bg of 24 or how in the comedian episode he was ready to take Notes from iyami and a lot of other small things!!

i would think hes actually a bit more serious n calm in hs and san is him amping up traits that drew people to him in hs and it backfiring on kara spectacularly - kara is always gauging people and their reactions and acting in a way he believes will get something positive, but at the same time is utterly oblivious when it comes to actually Getting them n i talked about the girls on the bridge but this is also prevalent with ichi who kara just. Doesnt Get and can not figure out how to maneuver their relationship. like oso, kara is and elder brother!! and elder brothers have an image theyre supposed to uphold, but while kara acts the part he doesnt do the shit a big brother does and shrugs that responsibility off on oso until oso fucks up until s2, where they share the role more evenly and his relationship with ichi improves but this is another essay entirely. what im trying to get with that is that hyperfocus on what other people think of him, but his complete disregard when it comes to their actual reaction and instead what he wants their reactions to be would also greatly impact him transtioning from a teen to an adult im sorry im getting sloppy now

osomatsu… i really adore him too much and i understand how totty felt in their episode bc i also lent my phone to a friend who needed to desperately jack it before meeting new people n i talk about him a whole lot too. hes mean and an asshole and garbage n i know a lot of people find him plain n boring but idk. i dont think thats the case hes a really complexed n nuanced character n hes literally has always been way back from kun n thats expected from a main character but… hes always been mean n dumb n sly and he can get so pathetically vunerable and thats literally!! him. hes a normal dude nothing wrong with that n it can be real refreshing. n i suppose im so fond of fishing trio+choro bc they remind me of my friends. but yeah even if hes 'plain’ i dont see why thats a bad thing. n this they always have the most interesting body language like despite kara being So Much his body language was always closed off n singled him out as everything But exuberant and bright, and osos quirks like how he stands on his toes a lot had always been so cute… its relaxed and open n screams Talk To Me!!!!

ahh but i always end up thinking oso was. oso??? theres not much to say that i havent before but i do think that he was a lot more like he was in episode 2 when ranting to chibita about having shitty brothers and then actively Chose to be a good brother even if he wasnt a good person and be a stable rock and be someone they could all come back to at the end of the day. and hes good at math im never letting this die.

[sevitent]

@timaeusstestified @timaeusstestified @timaeusstestified

ch 1:

[a/n: wrote this in class so there might be errors gomenasai!! arigatogozaimasu for reading!!]

“aku-chan-senpai!”

it was after school on a friday. most of the students had gone home for the day, leaving only the two of them, alone in the courtyard. jun rifled through the pockets of their authentic komaeda jacket (they had obtained it only the day before, besting komaeda in a knife fight and taking it as a trophy), taking out a pink envelope carefully decorated with glittery pink hearts.

“aku-chan-senpai?” they tried again to get the other’s attention, fidgeting nervously. after what seemed like an eternity, akutagawa turned to face them, a scowl scrawled across their face.

“what do you want, peasant?” [a/n: i think jun wants to be called a peasant? might be a fetish idk] he looked down on jun, despite them both being 5’8, and jun hesitantly extended the letter towards akutagawa-

only for it to be ripped to shreds in their hands by rashomon.

ch 2:

“tch. i can’t believe you think i’d ever be interested in you.” akutagawa turns and starts to walk away, leaving jun behind. jun falls to their knees, scrambling to pick up the torn pieces of their letter. they give up bc there’s too many of them and stand up, walking in the opposite direction while crying loudly. their 100% genuine komaeda shirt is getting soaked but they don’t care. the love of their life just rejected them.

they don’t see that akutagawa has stopped in his tracks, feeling immensely guilty. turning, he calls out. "jun-chan, wait."

jun spins, looking up hopefully. cherry blossom petals swirl around akutagawa; he looks ethereal in the fading sunlight. “yes, aku-chan-senpai?”

he shoves his hands into his pockets, blushing heavily. “hey, i feel bad, so like, wanna go on a date with me?” he looks away. “it’s not like i like you or anything though, baka.”

“really? you want to?” jun looks up, hope shining in their eyes. komaeda has succeeded, hope has spread just a bit further today. too bad he’s dead.

the two run towards each other, and they collide in the middle, akutagawa wrapping his arms around jun. there are still cherry blossoms falling. it’s so romantic.

“so where do you want to go?” akutagawa asks.

jun’s stomach growls bc they just ran 420 miles for xc. “can we get food?”

ch 3:

an hour later they’re walking through a park that’s somehow completely empty except for the two of them.  akutagawa has ice cream and jun has bubble tea. they just ate at restaurant or smth idk. their fingers are intertwined and they’re gay.

jun hod insisted on being romantic so they wandered off the path and got lost in the forest, but eventually they manage to find their way back to the official path and not get mauled to death by bears. walking forward a bit, they come to a courtyard which is somehow also empty. anime magic.

they decide to take a seat on the edge of a fountain and fall into an easy silence. it’s super chill and stuff, but jun has a question.

“aku-chan-senpai, what do you like most about me?” jun looks up at him curiously. akutagawa ponders for a second before responding.

“your sunglasses. they’re really neat.”

“:o [a/n: what the fuck jun. how did you say an emoticon. are you okay.] i got them from this really nice man. i had to kill him for them tho.” they sip their bubble tea. “they look really nice though. definitely worth it.”

akutagawa nods in agreement, reaching into his pocket. “jun, now i have a question for you.”

“okay!” jun turns away to set down their tea, but when they turn back, akutagawa is kneeling in front of them, a small box in his hands. they open it to reveal a ring.

ch 4:

“jun, will you-“

suddenly, out of the bushes by the fountain leapt sasuke, having just gotten off from work.

“jun-chan! i can’t believe this!” jun looked into his eyes and saw a mixture of sadness and disbelief as they stepped towards him.

akutagawa stood up, confused. “babe, who’s this?”

“im his boyfriend, fUCKER.” sasuke was rabid. “and who do you think you are?”

akutagawa turned away, pulling jun close. “tch. *im* the one he’s in love with.”

not wanting to enrage sasuke further, jun stepped away from akutagawa. it was a mistake. he immediately looked ready to cry, distress written in every feature of his face. “aku-chan-senpai! don’t cry!” but it was too late. akutagawa had fallen onto his hands and knees, the amount of tears pouring from his eyes rivaling the amount of water in the fountain. jun has to step away so they don’t drown.

“that’s what i thought.” sasuke said smugly. he crossed his arms and strode over to pull jun towards him. “why would jun want to be with you, when he could be with me, a world famous stripper.” he paused “besides. you have rabies and that’s gross.”

jun pulled away with disgust. “you have rabies too, sasuke.”

sasuke screamed in horror. “JUN!!1! i trusted you not to tell anyone!”

jun shrugged. “you were being mean to akutagawa.” they turned away, hiding their face. “i don’t think this is going to work sasuke... we need to break up”

ch 5:

akutagawa, who had finally stopped fucking crying, looked up in joy. “jun-chan!”

sasuke gasps in horror. “this can’t be happening jun…after all we’ve been through” he looks down. “i broke up with naruto for you…we even got matching haircuts..." sasuke stares at the ground sadly, tears welling in his black orbs.

jun's heart aches and they reach out with one hand. "we can still be friends bro..."

sasuke's head jerks up and his eyes are bright red. “i even got you that ninja band!” he pauses, breathing heavily. “i thought you were bae…” he looks away. “turns out you’re just fam…”

jun trembles in a mixture of sadness and fear, but akutagawa grabs their arm, pulling them away and steadying them. “i’ll protect you, jun” he turns to glare at sasuke, rashomon crackling around him and jun. it’s very romantic.

looking up into akutagawa’s eyes (despite them still being the same height), jun is filled with love. [a/n: love is stored…in the ~~rat~~ jun] “senpai….”

“no!! this can’t be happening!!1!1” sasuke is rabid 2, electric boogaloo. he pulls out 69 kunai, drawing his arm back to attack.

before they know what’s happened, akutagawa shoves jun behind them, blocking them from the attack. rashomon blocks all the pointy knives and akutagawa opens his mouth to say something smug when he freezes and puts a hand to his chest. turns out sasuke also had the little ninja star things.

ch 6:

akutagawa falls backwards into jun’s arms. jun’s crying. akutagawa’s crying. “aku-chan-senpai!!! you can’t die! we-” jun chokes on their tears. they’re very sad. “we were going to get married….”

akutagawa gently touches the side of jun’s face. “don’t worry-“ he coughs blood. it stains jun’s 100% authentic komaeda jacket but they don’t care. “jun…” they make eye contact. “jun, i will always love y-“ his head drops. he’s dead can we get an f.

“no! noooo!!!” jun screams, shaking akutagawa. there’s no response. “this can’t be happening, this can’t, this can’t,” they’re muttering to themself.

sasuke laughs. “see! i told you i was the stronger one! look at that, he couldn’t even protect you.” he holds out his arms. “now come here”

jun doesn’t respond. they gently let akutagawa down, reaching under their coat to grab something. reaching up, they untie their ninja band, letting it drop to the ground. with their back to sasuke, they stand up.

“give your boyfriend a hug~” sasuke sounds happy.

turning on their heel, jun reveals what he had taken from akutagawa: a gun. who gave an emo teen a gun tf. “sasuke…” jun’s voice is quiet. they’re probably in shock idk.

sasuke sneers. “you can’t shoot me, coward. you love me too much.” he drops his weapons, t posing [a/n: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16507784 ]. “pull the trigger, i dare you.”

jun’s grip tightens on the gun. “sasuke……….i can’t believe you’ve done this….i used to love you….but now-“

theyre cut off by sasuke. “stop monologuing and pull the trigger. my arms are getting tired, you fuck.”

jun aims, puts their finger on the trigger, closes their eyes, pulls the trigger [a/n: fuck the safety]. there’s a really loud bang. so loud that jun goes deaf.

and everything fades to black.

coda:

there’s a loud beeping noise and jun opens their eyes to be greeted with ceiling komaeda. that means theyre in their bedroom, so…

they roll over, checking their phone. it says that it’s 6:01am on friday, april 20.

was it all a dream…?

they get up, performing daily rituals: greeting ceiling komaeda, kissing their mettaton poster, praying at their sasuke shrine, making their daily sacrifice to their guy fieri shrine. they decide to wear their komaeda outfit with their replica mettaton boots and their favorite sunglasses. it just feels right. when they pass their desk, something on it catches their eye: a pink envelope carefully decorated with glittery pink hearts.

“oh god oh fuck.”

[a/n: hope you enjoyed!!!]

[ethospathoslogan]

everything that you aren’t; a prinxiety/sanders sides one shot

A/N: this fic was set out to kill me js, this is my third time attempting to repost this bc my computer kept freaking out. also, important note: i know that there are weird symbols when you view this on a dashboard. i do not know why tumblr is doing this to me and many other writers. if you view the fic on mobile or on my actual blog, they go away.

summary: Virgil was everything that Roman wasn’t. Even while being able to call Logan, Roman, and Patton his friends, he still found himself throwing his walls back up because he didn’t want to be hurt, and he didn’t want to hurt. Roman’s voice was heard in times of hope, Virgil’s was heard in times of peril. He would rather keep Thomas back because he couldn’t even begin to understand why someone would rather try and fail than not try at all and be okay, but maybe it was because Virgil was never really brave in the first place. Virgil and Roman couldn’t be more different, and Virgil couldn’t think of any possibility in which Roman would like him back in that way. Hell, sometimes Virgil wondered if Roman even liked him at all, or if every smile and nice comment was just an act. After all, Roman was an actor. His profession was based in lying, and Virgil had had his fill of liars.

ships: prinxiety

WC: 6,458

warnings: self deprecating thoughts***, anxiety, deceit is mentioned like twice but he’s not pivotal in the story, cursing, some angst, confessions

read on ao3

tagging: @panic-at-the-moment​, @princelogical

Virgil believed that his existence was just him being forced into situations that he didn’t mean to get into, but situations he still had to reap the consequences for.

Situation number one: Virgil, despite everything, didn’t want to be a “Dark Side”, as Creativity had dubbed them. He knew that he didn’t belong with Logic, Creativity, and Morality; they were the good guys. They were the ones who Thomas liked and cherished. They didn’t have to be hidden from Thomas. The Dark Sides, though, Virgil just felt wrong about being with them. If Logic, Creativity, and Morality were the good guys, the Dark Sides were, without a doubt, the bad guys. The Dark Sides blinded Thomas; they made him believe and do things that he shouldn’t, and Virgil was a part of that. He contributed to the harm done.

But he felt like he wasn’t wanted by the Dark Sides, either. He was Anxiety. He made Thomas worry about things that most people wouldn’t, and the others didn’t like that. They didn’t like that Virgil made Thomas anxious about their plans. Virgil didn’t have enough fingers and toes to count how many times he and Deceit fought because Deceit wanted to lie and Anxiety was too anxious to go through with it. Virgil wasn’t wanted by the Light Sides because he was too evil, and he wasn’t wanted by the Dark Sides for being too weak.

Situation number two: By the time Virgil started being around Logan, Roman, and Patton more than not, he was already used to being unwanted. Of course the other three wouldn’t enjoy his presence. Virgil was summoned because Thomas wasn’t able to control his nerves. It wasn’t like any of them actually required his assistance. They had no reason to; Virgil never agreed with them, never helped them. He was just a hindrance to them, and all of them knew it. Therefore, he was unwanted by them.

But being unwanted by Logan, Roman, and Patton was different than being unwanted by the Dark Sides. Sure, the Dark Sides didn’t like him, but if Virgil was being honest, none of them ever liked each other. They were chaos, they were the negative aspects of Thomas that were kept hidden from him. They weren’t expected to get along. They just needed to work together. But with the Light Sides, it wasn’t so much as every man for himself as it was three-against-one. So often, Virgil found himself fighting a losing battle by himself because he was trying to do what was best for Thomas, trying to protect Thomas, and the others refused to understand that. And the worst part was that they could easily throw Virgil away; they believed that they didn’t need him, and Virgil started to think that they were right.

Situation number three: Virgil was truly accepted by Logan, Roman, and Patton. It wasn’t a situation he expected to find himself in, and the other Dark Sides didn’t like it, but Virgil liked it… loved it, actually. Patton was his best friend, Logan was a good buffer for when Patton and Roman’s heightened energies got too overwhelming, and Roman was really working to be nicer to him. Virgil liked these consequences.

Situation number four: Deceit came back and took the place of Patton. Virgil should have known. He should have realized that “Patton” wasn’t Patton the moment he showed up. Virgil lived with Deceit for years , he should have been able to recognize his faulty portrayal and old ways. He should have been able to protect all of them. That was Anxiety’s role, right? To protect everyone?

Virgil sometimes believed he did a real shitty job at it.

Situation number five: Roman and the terrible, painful, tragic feelings Virgil caught for him.

Honestly, Virgil falling for Roman was about the worst thing he could’ve gotten himself into. Roman and Virgil were two sides of the same coin and Roman was the better side. Princey could be loud, stubborn, and ready to throw himself and Thomas into heartbreaking situations disguised as grand romantic gestures. He was all of that but, dammit, he meant all of it with the best of his heart. He wanted to be heard because he believed that he had the right answers, even Virgil saw that. He charged into every battlefield he could because Roman was brave; he’d rather be hurt trying then never try at all. It could be tiresome to watch Roman do this, but Virgil couldn’t help but be impressed - amazed - by Roman and his spirit.

Virgil was everything that Roman wasn’t. Even while being able to call Logan, Roman, and Patton his friends, he still found himself throwing his walls back up because he didn’t want to be hurt, and he didn’t want to hurt. Roman’s voice was heard in times of hope, Virgil’s was heard in times of peril. He would rather keep Thomas back because he couldn’t even begin to understand why someone would rather try and fail than not try at all and be okay, but maybe it was because Virgil was never really brave in the first place.

Virgil and Roman couldn’t be more different, and Virgil couldn’t think of any possibility in which Roman would like him back in that way. Hell, sometimes Virgil wondered if Roman even liked him at all, or if every smile and nice comment was just an act.

After all, Roman was an actor. His profession was based in lying, and Virgil had had his fill of liars.

“Shit,” Virgil muttered to himself, pushing himself up into a sitting position on his bed and tugging his headphones off. He had retreated to his room to get away from all these thoughts, especially the ones that involved Roman, and he had hoped his music would dull out everything else. Instead, though, his room just made everything worse (because of course it did, it was Anxiety’s Room, he should’ve expected that) and his music was just giving him a headache.

He looked around his room, hoping to find something other than cobwebs and albums he already listened to to focus on, but the only thing that caught his eye were his Nightmare Before Christmas posters. They were the ones Princey wanted after he saw Virgil’s room because, even though Roman might as well have been a Disney Prince himself, those were apparently the only posters he didn’t have.

Maybe if you gave them to him, he would like like you more, his room whispered to him.

“But I like those posters,” Virgil mumbled, picking at the frayed edges of the sleeve of his hoodie. Despite the purple hoodie being fairly new, at least in comparison to his old one, he had already managed to wear it down with his anxious ticks.

But you like Roman, and Roman likes those posters, his room continued, its voice (Virgil’s inner voice? Virgil barely understood his own room, sometimes) getting closer to Virgil’s ear and he thought he felt something start to wrap around his throat. And if Roman won’t like you for you, he might as well like you for what you can give him. Are you worth anything else than what you can give, Virgil? 

“Okay, nope, no, I’m not doing this,” Virgil said, his own voice strained and barely levelled, as he pushed himself off his bed. He couldn’t stay here, not when he could start feeling the beginnings of an attack creep up on him. He pulled his headphones down around his neck, the familiar weight more comforting than the tendrils of his room, and he sunk out as quickly as he could.

Virgil wondered if he had anyone on his side, really. The Dark Sides hated him, and he was friends with Logan, Roman, and Patton, but how long was that going to last? He couldn’t even keep his own room in check, how was he supposed to remain friends forever with the three sides he was never meant to be a part of?

He mentally kicked himself as he appeared in the commons. He knew that he shouldn’t be thinking things like that. He was grateful, he really was, to have friends like the others. He even admitted that, despite their bickering, he tended to feel better after he saw the other sides. Especially Patton, because Patton always knew how to help Virgil and was Virgil’s first friend.

Speaking of, Virgil thought as he heard moving around in the kitchen and light humming.

Poking his head into the kitchen, he saw Patton with his back to him, tidying up and putting away whatever dishes were left in the drainboard. “Hey, Patton,” he said, leaning against the doorway.

Patton looked over his shoulder and beamed when he saw Virgil. “Hey, kiddo!” he said, his voice containing its usual amount of cheeriness. “I didn’t hear you come down.”

Virgil shrugged. “Just needed to get out of my room for a bit,” he said, watching as Patton put away a final glass.

When Patton spun around to face him fully, Virgil didn’t miss how his grin faltered. Virgil then realized that his room probably made him look worse for wear due to his current state. He should’ve checked his mirror before he left; he had a feeling that his eyeshadow was probably a lot darker than what he usually did.

“You feeling alright, Virgil?” Patton asked, his concern evident behind his smile.

Virgil wanted to brush Patton’s worry off and say that he was fine, but that was a lie, and Virgil couldn’t lie to Patton. Especially not after Deceit made his return. “Just tired,” he finally said, blowing his bangs partly out of his face so that he could, at least, somewhat see. It wasn’t a lie; Virgil was exhausted (he always was). He just… didn’t want to explain why he was tired specifically now. If he told Patton what was going on, he was then just going to tell Patton everything, because Patton is that type of person who Virgil can just talk to for hours, and then Virgil was going to be emotionally drained and probably wallow about shit that he should have suffered alone with.

“Well, make sure you’re getting enough sleep,” Patton said. “I don’t want you getting sick on us.”

Virgil didn’t think that they got sick, it was more like an exhaustion-caused breakdown that caused, as Logan would say, an “error in the way the specific side was supposed to operate”.

(Virgil called it what it was: a “mental breakdown”, literally.)

Still, though, the sentiment brought a flush of heat to his cheeks. Even after all this time, he was still adjusting to being, well, liked . “Thanks, Pat,” he said with a small smile. “I’ll try.”

Virgil hadn’t even realized that another side had walked down the stairs until he heard the footsteps behind him and a voice say, “You’ll try what?”

Virgil flinched, definitely more than he should have, and spun around to face Roman staring at him with a raised eyebrow and a bemused expression.

He’s judging you, he thought. “Oh, hey,” Virgil muttered, trying to make his voice calmer than he felt. He tried to ignore how he could feel his heart thumping against his ribcage upon seeing Roman.

“Scared to see me, Virgil?” Roman asked with a laugh, sitting down on the couch. “You’re much more jumpier than usual, which is saying something. Was it my appearance? Do I not look dashing today?”

Roman was smirking and Virgil’s mind was on the brink of overdrive trying to figure out whether Roman was offended, making fun of him, or if it was just the typical teasing that they tended to fall into.

“You’re fine,” Virgil mumbled, looking away as Patton walked past him into the living room. He wanted to say more because, if he was being honest, he believed that Roman looked much better than fine but how would Roman react if he said anything different and-

“Just fine? Virgil, you wound me” Roman asked, placing his hand to his heart. He sounded offended. Fuck, he was messing this up, like he usually did. “Patton, Virgil says I look ‘just fine’, isn’t that absurd?”

Virgil swallowed and looked back up to Roman who was- who was smiling. Okay. Good. He wasn’t offended, he was teasing. Virgil knew this. Him and Roman did this all the time-

“I think you look great today, Roman,” Patton beamed, flopping down onto the couch next to Roman.

“I guess Virgil just has higher standards,” Roman said with wink. Virgil’s mind short-circuited. “What a shame that I must be critiqued so harshly.”

“Sorry,” Virgil mumbled, pulling his hoodie sleeves over his hands with a shrug.

“Do you guys want to watch a movie?” Patton asked before Roman could reply, if he even was going to reply. “I’m pretty sure WALL-E is still in the DVD player from last time.”

“Oh, yes please,” Roman said, grinning. “I can never get enough of that movie.” He then looked back to Virgil. “Are you going to grace us with your presence?”

He’s asking because he feels obligated to, he thought, scrunching up the edges of his hoodie sleeves in his fists. Patton is the only one who wants you here. Roman doesn’t want you- 

“I’m actually going to go back to my room,” Virgil said, his words rushed. “I only came down for a break, I have some things to do.”

Virgil wished he didn’t notice the falter in Patton’s smile at hearing that he wouldn’t be joining them. “Oh, okay,” Patton said. “We’ll be down here if you need anything!”

Virgil nodded and gave them a wordless salute before sinking back into his room.

When he appeared in his room, he immediately headed over to his bed and flopped down on it.

Just fine? Virgil, you wound me. 

What a shame that I must be critiqued so harshly. 

Roman had been joking when he said that. Virgil heard his tone and saw Roman’s grin. Roman had been teasing Virgil and was not gravely affected by anything Virgil said.

But what if he misheard? What if he misinterpreted Roman’s tone? What if he missed a wary side eye shared with Patton? What if Roman, the moment Virgil left, started to complain to Patton about Virgil and everything he did?

Virgil’s eyes drifted again to his Tim Burton posters.

Should have given him the damn posters, Virgil thought as he pulled his headphones back on. He turned his music as loud as he needed to not be able to hear his own thoughts.

--

They had been going over Roman’s ideas for videos in the common room for over two hours now and, frankly, Virgil was exhausted. And irritated. And frustrated. And he could feel his heart start to pick up speed as the rejected pile grew higher and the deadline for the video grew closer.

He had been trying to hold back his comments as best he could, or at the very least soften them. He knew that coming up with ideas was stressful for Roman, and Virgil didn’t even think he’d be able to handle standing around while everybody else pulled apart what he made. He could see how the process wore Roman down, and Virgil felt bad that this was something that they had to do.

But Virgil could also feel his nerves jolting under his skin and, with each tick of the clock, the deadline grew closer. They had cut this one close, with only just over a week to find an idea, write a script, film, and edit. And that’s all if something doesn’t go wrong in any of those four processes, which is unlikely.

So, yes, Virgil was stressed and anxious and he could feel it building up inside of him.

Patton was currently kneeling on the floor next to the ideas that had been rejected to see if any could be looked at for a second time. Most of his time was spent, however, smoothing out papers that had been crumpled into balls, reading them over, and then gently and silently stacking them back into a neat pile. Logan was currently looking through a stack of looseleaf that Roman handed him. He was separating it out into three different piles and, occasionally, would move a paper from one to the another. Roman was flipping through a notebook he had, sometimes ripping out pieces and shoving them to Logan, sometimes glaring at what he had written, blowing his hair out of his eyes, and flipping the page angrily.

Virgil, in the middle of all of this, felt helpless. Silently, he kneeled down next to Patton and started looking at the papers that Patton hadn’t rechecked yet.

He picked up one of the discarded papers and read How to approach your crush. 

Right, that one. Logan originally voiced that he found it a bit juvenile and that, as an adult, Thomas should look past any nerves when talking with someone he was attracted to. He took back that comment, however, when Virgil pointed out that there are people, including Thomas, who get anxious when approaching others. Still, though, the idea was still rejected because it was too similar to their Valentine’s Day idea that they already did.

Virgil had been too engrossed in finding an idea that worked when that one was first mentioned, but now he could have laughed at the irony of it if it wasn’t so spot on to what he was experiencing. He sighed and put the paper back down and, upon seeing him do that, Patton flashed him a soft smile.

“Another song with Jon Cozart,” Logan read off of the page he was holding. Virgil and Patton looked over their shoulders to see Logan raise an eyebrow at Roman, who only offered the same back. “Too vague and not nearly enough time.”

“Now, Lo, I think we can be a bit softer than that,” Patton chastised. If it wasn’t for Patton, Virgil thought that Roman and Logan might have wrung each others necks by now. Virgil was as tired and stressed as any of them, and he assumed Patton was just the same, but Logan’s unloosened tie and mussed hair did not go unnoticed, just as well for Roman’s wrinkled sash and constantly furrowed brows.

“It’s a good idea, Ro,” Patton then said, giving Roman an encouraging smile. “Just one that we’ll have to put aside for another day when we have more time. You can think of a song in the meantime, though!”

Roman sighed with an eyeroll. “No, it’s fine,” he said dismissively, looking back to his notebook. “We’ve done a video like that before anyway, so throw it out.”

“I don’t think we have to throw it out,” Logan said, placing the paper in the middle pile. “We’ve told you before, Roman, not every idea of yours has to be completely original, as an idea like that is already difficult to come by.”

“I know what you’ve all said,” Roman said, his voice clipped and with an edge of annoyance. Him and Logan then shared a look that Virgil thought was either a silent apology or a challenge for Logan to quip back at him.

For the next couple minutes, the four resorted back to silently looking through ideas, the only sound being the placing, tearing, or crinkling of paper.

Suddenly, Roman said, “Virgil, what do you think of this one?” Virgil turned to face him, cross-legged on the floor and looking up at him with a raised eyebrow. “Villains in Disney movies and their motives, along with what they represent.”

Virgil thought for a minute. “Honestly?” he asked and Roman nodded eagerly. “I think it’s too much to do in such a short time and too risky. I mean, you and Logan will have to spend time narrowing down what villains to use. Then you’ll have to write and complete a script. So that’s already a couple of days. Then there’s filming and editing. And something will probably go wrong in that process that could push us back a day or more.”

Roman then looked down at the page he had ripped from his notebook, frowning. “I don’t think it’ll be too much,” he said. “Besides, if we have to, we can push the video back a day or so.”

“And disappoint our viewers?” Virgil asked. “I don’t think that that’s something we should risk.” Virgil wished that he could have continued to keep his anxieties at bay, but even he saw that they couldn’t be wasting time anymore. He had to be completely honest with his thoughts if they wanted to progress.

“Oh, I don’t think we’ll push our viewers away if we’re a little late,” Patton piped up.

“But we don’t know that,” Virgil pointed out.

“You said that this was too risky,” Roman said, looking back up at Virgil. “How? I thought you liked Disney?”

“I do,” Virgil said. “But what if people watching disagree with what we say? What if they think our opinions are wrong?”

“Well, naturally, someone out there is going to disagree with what we think,” Logan added.

“Yeah, obviously, but what if they get mad?” Virgil asked. “You know how people can be, especially about villain characters. We say one wrong thing, we vilify someone too much or not enough, and suddenly everyone hates us.” He sighed. “Besides, doesn’t this kinda blend into ‘The Dark Side of Disney’?”

“Logan just said that not everything has to be original,” Roman said, the frown still on his face as he crinkled the edge of his paper.

“Yeah, but we should at least try to do a topic we haven’t done yet before resorting to old ones,” Virgil said, reaching for one of the piles he and Patton were looking through. He began to look through them again. “There’s, like, a thousand ideas in here. I’m sure we’ll find another one.”

Roman then, with a frustrated noise, crumpled up the paper in his hand and everyone’s head snapped to him. “I’m not surprised that you don’t like my ideas. Even the ones that I think you’ll like, you find a reason to not do them,” he snapped, the waver in his voice easily noticeable. “You just want to brush them off because- because you’re scared , even when it’s a good idea!” The sudden emotion in Roman’s voice caused everyone to completely still their movements. Virgil’s hands froze on the paper he was holding, his tense fingers pressing wrinkles into it.

Shit. Roman gave an idea to Virgil that he thought he’d like and Virgil just shut it down completely when he was supposed to be understanding. Virgil didn’t even think to give any constructive criticism; he just thought to give all the negatives because of course he thought that that was the right thing to do. Now, Roman was even more frustrated and seemed as if he was on the edge of a breakdown over his ideas and Virgil was the one who pushed him to that point.

Roman was right about Virgil being scared, too. Even Virgil couldn’t deny that. Honestly, Virgil actually liked the idea. He just saw it as a point for controversy among viewers and decided to only point out that instead of at least telling Roman that he liked it.

Shit. Fuck. 

Virgil wanted to say something, anything, that could have calmed Roman but whatever he had in mind died in his throat. Instead, Patton, after looking between the two, said gently, “How about we call it a day? We’re all tired and a little frustrated, so I think it would be best if we just all relax for the rest of the night, okay?”

Roman, wordlessly, snatched his notebook and some of the papers closest to him before sinking out. Logan quickly neatened up his own papers before muttering an indecipherable excuse to go to his own room and sinking out. Virgil tugged his sleeves around his hands and pulled them close to his chest.

“I-I didn’t mean to-” Virgil stuttered out as Patton began to neaten the papers they were looking through.

“I know you didn’t, kiddo,” Patton said softly. “Everyone is just a little tense and I think Roman is just upset that today didn’t go so well for his ideas. He’ll be okay.”

Virgil found that even Patton’s reassuring words didn’t make him feel better. Him and Roman have fought before, and they have both said things to each other that stung, but now it was… different. Even looking past Virgil’s crush on Roman, the two were friends.

Virgil didn’t want to be the one to hurt Roman anymore, and he hated that, once again, he was.

--

Virgil wondered what it was about him that made everything go wrong.

He liked Roman; he liked Roman so much that it sort of scared him. Roman’s passion had grown on him, his courage was impressive, and Virgil really liked being able to have more civil -hell, even great - conversations with Roman than not. The two were both getting better at listening to each other and understanding each of their sides, and Virgil really did appreciate Roman’s efforts. There were slip-ups, yes, but at least the two were trying.

But then today happened, and Virgil felt as if he set all their progress (and the already slim chances of Roman ever liking him back) on fire. He should’ve been kinder, softer, when telling Roman what he thought. He probably could have gotten his point across without hurting Roman in the end. Now, Roman retreated to his room and most definitely hated Virgil and the other sides probably saw that Virgil still wasn’t one of them because this was all too good to be true and-

Virgil’s head shot up from where it rested on his pillow when there was a soft knock on his door.

When he swung open his door, his eyes widened at who was on the other side of it. “Roman,” he said, his shock clear in his voice.

“Uh, hey,” Roman said with a sheepish smile. He wasn’t clad in his usual regal attire and, instead, had a red hoodie and black pajama bottoms with little golden crowns decorating it pulled on. Virgil instantly noticed that he looked nervous. “Can… Can I come in?”

Virgil nodded and wordlessly stepped aside to let Roman in. Roman stopped in the middle of his room and looked around helplessly, as if he didn’t know what to do with his body. Virgil, taking the first initiative, sat on the floor, leaning up against his bed. “Care to join me?” he asked Roman.

Roman arched an eyebrow. “You do realize that you have chairs and a bed we can sit on, right?”

Virgil shrugged. “Yeah, but in all honesty, it seems like we’re about to have a conversation that’s better done on the floor than in a chair.”

Roman was silent for a moment before sighing and nodding. “That, somehow, makes perfect sense,” he said, taking a seat next to Virgil.

The two then resorted back to silence, Virgil pulling at loose threads on his hoodie, Roman staring down at his hands. If there was a time for Virgil to attempt an apology, now would be the time to do it. He didn’t even know if it would be good, but he might as well try and-

“I’m sorry,” Roman suddenly said and Virgil quickly turned his head to Roman, his eyebrows furrowed. “I… I shouldn’t have snapped at you today. I know you were only helping, and I told you that I wanted your honest opinion, but I still got mad at you. I guess I was just frustrated because most of my ideas already were shot down and… I guess I just thought you would agree because it was Disney and we’ve done a Disney video together. I’m… I’m really sorry, Virgil.”

Virgil gaped at Roman. He didn’t even think Roman was going to give an apology, hell, he didn’t think Roman needed to give one. “R-Roman-”

“And I said that you were scared,” Roman continued, shaking his head. “That… that really wasn’t right of me. Everything you were saying was true, at least some of it. And even if I didn’t agree with everything you were saying, I should’ve never called you scared. Again, I’m really, really sorry, Virg.”

Virgil shook his head. “Roman, you- you don’t need to be the one apologizing,” he said. “If anyone apologizes, it should be me! I mean, I-I should have been way nicer with your idea than I was because- because I actually really liked it. I was just nervous because we were looking at ideas for so long at that point and getting nothing done and we really needed to start moving forward and-” He shook his head again, steadying his thoughts before he rambled on into nothingness. “What- What I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry. I knew that you were stressed and frustrated and I should’ve been… more aware of that.”

Roman smiled softly at Virgil. “I appreciate the apology, Virgil,” he said. “But I still don’t think anything I said was right, especially when we’re getting along a lot better and working on things-”

“I’m not holding anything you said over you, Roman,” Virgil said. Roman snapped his mouth shut and almost looked shocked. “I… I’ve noticed how you’ve been trying, and I really appreciate that, and I think we are getting along a lot better. I thought what I said ruined everything. I wasn’t even hurt by what you said, I was more worried that I hurt you . And I think you were right to call me scared. I listed all the negatives to that video, even when there were positives, because I was scared, and it’s not the first time I’ve been a coward.”

Roman shook his head, frowning. “That’s the thing, though, Virg,” he said. “I really don’t think that’s true, at least not all the time, and you’re definitely not a coward. You’ve helped all of us -helped me - out of so many situations that were even stressful for you. That’s not cowardly.”

Virgil looked over at Roman, and Roman at Virgil, and Virgil couldn’t ignore how his heart leapt to his throat when their eyes met. Shit.

Virgil hadn’t meant to say, “Shit, Roman, you’re making this so much harder.” Still, though, he did, and Roman’s eyebrows furrowed and Virgil slapped a hand over his mouth.

Dammit. Shit. Fuck. Every other curse word that Virgil knew but couldn’t think of in this time of peril. 

“What- What do you mean?” Roman asked, his confusion obvious.

Virgil truly hated himself at this moment. He hadn’t been able to stop himself from voicing his thoughts and now he couldn’t back out because Roman knew that something was up. They could have had a nice chat and worked out their issues and now Virgil was going to ruin everything by putting feelings into the conversation that Roman most likely would never reciprocate and-

“I- this whole situation is definitely getting harder because you’re here and you’re being so nice -and not that you’re not nice because you are and we just said that we were getting better with each other- but this is different, you know? But, no, you don’t know, because why would you? And I feel like I’m just messing everything up but-” Just gotta rip it off fast like a band aid “-I like you, Roman. Like as in I’m into you, Roman. A lot.”

Virgil quickly averted his eyes, not wanting to see what Roman’s reaction would be, before continuing, “And what sucks- what really sucks about this is that I shouldn’t, Roman. I shouldn’t like you as much as I do because I know that it can never happen. You’re everything I’m not, and I feel like I would just hold you back. You’re brave and passionate and I’m just… not anything close to as admirable.” He sighed with a shake of his head. “I know we’ve been working through things, and I know we’ve come a long way, but sometimes I think that this is just completely hopeless and that I’m going to mess up and you’re going to go back to not liking me at all, maybe even hating me. I… I never want it to get back to that point, but I understand if it has now.”

When Roman didn’t say anything, Virgil hesitantly looked at him and saw that he was wide eyed with a faint blush tinting his cheeks. “V-Virgil,” he said quietly. Virgil thought he could see the gears working in Roman’s head. “That- that was a lot all at once-” he gave a weak chuckle “-But I guess the first thing that I should start with is that… I like you, too. I have for a long time.”

For the first time in a long while, Virgil’s mind went silent.

“Once we started getting along better is when I realized it,” Roman said. “I knew that we still had a lot to work on but… I wanted to work on it. I wanted to get to know you better. And what do you mean that you shouldn’t like me because I’m, apparently, everything you’re not? Virgil, you’re intelligent, you’re willing to work as a team, it’s been you who has gotten us out of some of our worst times, and, I know I’ve told you this before but I have to say it again, you make me better. None of those are qualities that are unwanted in a… in a relationship, and they definitely shouldn’t be looked down upon. So, I don’t know what you’re talking about when you say that, because I think… I think that everything you are is great.”

Virgil gaped at Roman. It took three tries to finally find his words. “But- But I thought you didn’t like me-”

“Oh, thank you, I knew I forgot something,” Roman interjected with a grin. “You thought I could hate you? First of all, Virgil, I hate to admit it, but we have seen each other at our worst. If I didn’t want to at the very least be your friend, I wouldn’t have put in the effort. But I want to be your friend, or something more. Seeing how our relationship with you here has changed has been… amazing, honestly. And, second of all, I was more concerned with you hating me, especially after today!”

“Well that was my concern!” Virgil exclaimed. “And I could never hate you for basically the exact same reasons!”

The two shared a look, and when Roman started laughing, Virgil couldn’t help but join in either.

“Wow, we really are… messes,” Roman said, knocking their knees together.

“Honestly, yeah,” Virgil agreed with a chuckle.

“We’ve both been walking ourselves in circles with our fears.”

“Cognitive distortions.” At that, Virgil earned a side-eye from Roman, which he believed he deserved. “We thoughts things were different than what they actually were. Learned that from Logan.”

Roman rolled his eyes but there was still a smile on his face. His eyes then dropped to his hands and Virgil watched as his expression softened. “Seeing that we both feel the same way, I want to try to make this work, Virgil. I think that this… that we can eventually be something. We just have to…” He trailed off.

“We just have some things we still need to work on,” Virgil finished for him and Roman nodded. “I want this to work, too, Roman. I… I want to believe that it can but I don’t think we can just rush into things. If I’m being honest, I don’t want to rush into anything. I think we still need to- to work out some things and talk more but-” he then let out a soft laugh “-Dammit, I guess you’ve made me a romantic, because I really want this to work.”

“We just have to try,” Roman said with a grin. “But I think we can do it.”

Virgil couldn’t help but smile at Roman, and when Roman held out his hand to Virgil, Virgil only hesitated a second before taking it. Roman squeezed his hand gently and Virgil felt his face heat up as his cheeks flushed.

“You know, this really brings about a new meaning to that one thing you once called me,” Virgil said. “That I was your chemically imbalanced romance?”

Roman nodded and Virgil rolled his eyes at the prideful look behind his eyes. “That was a good one.”

Virgil sighed and nodded. “Yeah, I guess it was,” he said even though that was one of the nicknames that he was definitely more impressed with.

Roman grinned, but Virgil furrowed his eyebrows at him as he started to notice the eyeshadow starting to appear under Roman’s eyes. Even though their conversation had been as calm as it could have been (including Virgil’s accidental but well-timed confession), eventually the effects of his room were going to start to hit Roman.

“I think we should get you out of here before you start becoming a panicked mess and I have to rescue you again,” Virgil said.

Roman frowned and ran his fingers under his eyes, looking at whatever eyeshadow rubbed off. “Oh, you’re right,” he said. “You know, I was starting to feel a little off.” Roman then stood and held his hand out to Virgil. “We can go back to my room, if you want? Just to talk, of course.”

Virgil nodded and took Roman’s hand, pulling himself up. “I’d like that,” he said.

The first thing he noticed when he appeared in Roman’s room was the walls.

“You really do have one-hundred-and-one Disney posters,” Virgil said.

Roman laughed. “You say that as if you’re surprised,” he said.

Give him the posters, he suddenly though. Gifts are good for relationships and he liked them so you should give him what he wants because it will probably make things better and make him like you more and- 

“You know, you can have those Tim Burton posters if you want,” Virgil said, despite another inner voice saying otherwise.

Roman shook his head. “Thanks for the offer, Virg, but I don’t want them.”

Virgil frowned. “But you said that you liked them,” he said. “You even came to my room once to try to take them.”

Roman waved a hand. “Well, yeah, but that was then,” he said. “Plus, I know that they’re your favorite. I would never want to take them from you.”

Roman smiled at Virgil, and Virgil smiled back.

Yeah, he believed that him and Roman could definitely work.

[voldiebuns]

HalLUDOween!!

So last weekend I went to HalLUDOween, aka Ludo's one night only, first time in six years concert! They're my favorite band and since I didn't think I'd ever get to hear them again in concert, of course I had to go. Even if it was in St. Louis, an approximately 11 hour drive from home lol But @biffelderberry and I figured it would be worth it, and it so was :D

We started out early Friday morning since it was going to be a long drive and we had to pick up a rental car since neither of our cars was up to such a drive. Of course we found out like an hour into the drive that the model we got had had a recall put out that very morning, but thankfully we didn't have any problems with it. The drive was actually not too bad, despite being so long and being mostly a drive through boring wilderness. We'd put together an approximately 13 hour playlist, so we had plenty of music to sing along with. And we made lots of stops at Taco Bell so I could get their potato tacos bc I'm apparently obsessed lol I ended up eating Taco Bell for every meal Friday, which was probably not a good idea, but it tasted fucking awesome.

(Me, left, and Biff at the beginning of the drive.)

Made it to the hotel around 8 maybe. There were two guys from Chicago in the check in line in front of us who we think may have been there for the concert as well, but the cool part was when we went down to breakfast in the morning, we met two other ppl who were there for the concert! They were from Wisconsin and California, so it was cool to talk to them for a bit about how much we all love Ludo and were so happy we were getting to see them again. We'd planned to use most of Saturday to explore St. Louis, since we'd come so far anyway. We'd wanted to do a ghost tour, but that didn't end up working out, but we did do a few other cool things. We went to an antiques store where we couldn't afford anything, but it still had some really interesting stuff. Then we went over to Grand Street, which I gather is kind of the popular downtown street. We ate at Lulu's Local Eatery, which is a small, hippster-y vegan place. I got the mac n cheese and Biff got the sliders, both of which were fucking delicious. Also very filling, which was a little disappointing bc we'd hoped to share the carnitas loaded tots after lol After that we went to a nearby comic book store. The owner was super nice and we talked to him about Ludo a bit (I was wearing my Ludo shirt) bc apparently everyone in town knew about this concert lol He'd had some other ppl in earlier who were going, I think from New York? Or maybe Arizona. We basically spent the whole weekend hearing from ppl in town about ppl coming in from out of state for the concert. Anyway, after that we did a little more walking around, mostly bc we wanted to look at all the pretty trees, and then went to Walmart to pick up some food (they have a So Delicious cashew milk chocolate cookies and cream ice cream that is to die for!). And crosstitching stuff bc Biff wanted to do an AO3 inspired bookmark design, and I thought it sounded fun as well. Also got some face masks bc why not. Which actually turned out not to be the best idea... When we got back to the hotel, I tried out my clay mask and it didn't go well. I did put a little too much water in it, but I don't think that accounts for how I apparently had an allergic reaction to it. Seriously, when I took it off, I looked like I had a rash all over my face. Thankfully my makeup skills were enough to cover it up, but I did end up sitting with a cool cloth on my face for awhile just to be sure the only reaction was the rash. Here's a picture of me post concert with half my makeup wiped off (the red side was waaaay better than when I first took off the mask):

So got ready, blah blah blah. And then it was time for the concert!! Costumes were encouraged, but since we didn't actually bring any, we just dressed up. My outfit of the night, which I loved bc I'd been waiting for an excuse to wear that crop top:

We took a Lyft to and from the venue since we didn't want to deal with parking or driving back at who knew what time. Which was probably a good thing bc the whole area around there was packed. More so for the second show, where the lines were literally down the block, but even for the first show. Bc of my trying to deal with a sudden allergic reaction rash, we were running a little late, so we got there like halfway through the opener. He was pretty good from what we heard, so I'll probably look up his music at some point. We had assigned seats in the balcony, which I was really glad of even if they cost more than GA down below. We would have had to get there hours early to get a good place there and would have had to stand, which I really am not up to for long amounts of time. But our seats were actually really good and we had a fantastic view of the stage. Except for the railing being right at eye level lol Since the concert was Halloween themed, they of course had some Halloween elements for the stage and their costumes. There were a couple of big, glowing blow up ghosts on either side of the stage. When the show started, about a dozen ppl came out in sheet ghost costumes and ran away around for awhile until it was just the band and they took off the sheets to show they were wearing skeleton onesies. Which I really really want one of now tbh.

Here's the vid I took of the intro. It was honestly so so awesome to see them in concert again. The first and only time I saw them before was in 2011, which was right before they basically broke up (ie they all just drifted away to other things and the band was no more). They did pretty much the song set that I'd been expecting, though there were a couple of things they sang that I hadn't expected. (They'd done a poll on twitter with Topek, Girls on Trampolines, and a couple of others, so since Topeka won I wasn't expecting them to play Girls on Trampolines.) And they did my top three favorite songs of theirs! Including Andrew going solo on my absolute favorite, Horror of Our Love! I took a vid of that too of course, which you can prob hear both Biff and I singing along to. They ended the concert with a cover of the Ghostbusters theme song and having a bunch of kids come out to throw candy to the crowd, which was a fun way to end it. There was no new music, aside from the two covers they did, which I think all of us had been hoping for. Even though we knew it was unlikely since the week before was the first time they'd all been in a room together in years. Still, the music and the experience of being part of the crowd was just as fantastic as last time. So yeah, the concert was amazing all around and totally worth the ridiculous drive :D After, we went down the block to the merch store, bc there was definitely no way I was leaving without something. We stood out in the cold for an hour waiting in line, which was fine except for the couple behind us was being really critical of the show and really annoying. We found out the reason it was taking so long was that the band was in the merch store talking to fans and signing stuff and taking pictures, which I hadn't expected. Of course their handler started telling them they needed to leave basically as soon as we got up to the front of the line. But! They were being pretty slow about it bc they wanted to keep talking to the fans, so Matt, the drummer, ended up at the door at the same time we were and he gave us hugs! He also said thanks for coming again, which made it sound like he recognized us? But idk. Anyway, as awesome as that was, the best part was apparently the girl behind us really wanted a hug from him and we were the last ones he hugged before leaving. Vengeance is sweet :D Anyway, I ended up with a t-shirt and a poster for the concert, plus a couple smaller ones from previous tours that they were giving away for free. There was a really cool tree print that I wish I would have gotten, so I hope they put that up online. There was a vinyl of the last CD as well that I wanted, but I really didn't feel like I could justify that as well. Maybe they'll put it up online too.

We took a Lyft back, which was a bit of an experience bc we had to cross the street to get to our ride and some asshole apparently was tired of waiting in traffic and tried to speed around while we were in the crosswalk. He stopped in time, but Biff really thought he was going to hit me :/ But we made it back to the hotel safely and met the lady from breakfast again. We ended up talking to her for awhile, which was fun bc she's been following the band for a long time and is apparently knows them personally bc of that. Sunday morning we slept in a bit bc we'd been out so late. We were both very glad we had decided not to drive home that day lol We went back out to Grand Street and had lunch at Lemongrass, a Vietnamese place there. I got the tofu summer roll and sesame tofu, and the sesame tofu was seriously good omg. After that we did some more walking and went to a bookstore we'd seen on Saturday. It was really cool and had a pretty fantastic variety of stuff spread out over three levels. We met a local Ludo fan there (we were both wearing the shirts we bought) who hadn't gotten to go to the concert and talked to her a little. Afterward we went over to the St. Louis Art Museum since they were supposed to have a textiles exhibit that sounded really interesting. We didn't end up finding it, and we only got to stay about half an hour before they closed, but it was still really fun. Plus they had some gorgeous views out front, some beautiful fall maples, and a statue of, apparently, Saint Louis.

We thought about going to the zoo after that, since it was literally across the street, but they were having some Halloween event and there were hundreds of small children everywhere. We decided that wasn't something we wanted to deal with lol So we went and picked up lunch from Fred and Ricky's Plant Delicious Foods, a lttle vegan grab and go place, instead and took it to eat at the hotel. The food was pretty good, though probably the best part is that I found out they ship nationwide, so I can order from there sometime if I want. Which is nice bc we really don't have many vegan places here. Monday it was time to leave. Because the drive home was long and we had to get back before the rental place closed at six, we got up at 5 am to head out. It wasn't too terrible, but we were definitely still tired. And I fell coming down the stairs with my suitcase and bruised my ass. It still hurts :/ Drive home seemed longer than the one there, probably bc I didn't really want to be going home lol It's so interesting how every time I go away for a fun weekend, it hits me when I get back how much I hate living at my house and in my city and in Texas in general. So I guess good motivation to try to find a way to move out sooner rather than later. So the weekend was fantastic! There were a few other places we would have liked to go, like the City Museum and some more vegan restaurants, but overall we hit some good places and had a lot of fun. Plus just the landscapes up there were so so pretty. We don't have trees like that in Texas lol But we're definitely thinking of going back to St. Louis sometime to see some more stuff. And maybe see Ludo again, if this concert was a sign of things to come! But of course it coudn't be all good. My throat was feeling a bit scratchy on the way home Monday, and by Tuesday I was pretty sick. Thankfully I had the whole week off plus Monday and Tuesday this week (I'd been hoping to go to a Star Trek meet up this weekend, but I couldn't afford it after all). I'm hoping I'm well by the time I go back to work, but it's been kind of a sucky way to spend my time off! But still worth it for Ludo lbr :D

(If you want to see the food pics I took, they’ll go up on my food blog: @foodandmind)