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rose-lighters · 5 years ago

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Time to rank every MCU film

Yes I am doing that oh so original thing of ranking every marvel film from worst to best. Criticisms and debates are welcome. (Disclaimer: I like all these films unless stated otherwise)

X. Incredible Hulk - I haven’t seen it. Sorry.

21. Guardians Of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - I can honestly say I hated this film. The only likeable part of the whole film was the soundtrack and the first few minutes with Groot dancing. Beyond that it was dull, cringy and oh so predictable. The second that Ego (???) appeared and said he was Quill’s dad I was just like “Oh so this guy’s the villain then” and noped out of there. I never saw past that point and don’t intend to.

20. Captain America: The Winter Soldier - People praise this film till kingdom come and I for one do not get it at all. Many say that it is unique in moving away from the typical superhero film and towards the spy genre. Maybe I just don’t like spy films but it is in no means a great Marvel film. I liked it enough but it’s so forgettable I had to google the plot for this review. I liked the characters and all but it just never stuck with me as anything special.

19. Guardians Of the Galaxy - Maybe I just don’t like the guardians??? I don’t know but this was another film that just didn’t stick with me. I like Rocket and Groot but beyond that the Guardians themselves hold no interest with me. I don’t care for the humor particularly and whilst the music is great that really shouldn’t be the best part of a film unless it’s a musical.

18. Avengers: Age of Ultron - People hate this film, I however do not. It’s an okay Marvel film, I don’t care for it enough to hate it. I like that scene where they’re all trying to lift mjolnir and I think I liked the ending (I watched it like two years ago so I don’t remember that well) but I have to agree with a lot of the criticism of white washing the Maximoffs (despite how much I love Elizabeth Olsen and Aaron Taylor Johnson, it was still shady). I didn’t hate the ‘giving Hawkeye a family’ like a lot of people did because the already made it clear he wasn’t like comic Clint.

17. Thor: The Dark World - Now we’re moving into films I do like (I love Marvel films more than I dislike them, it's literally just GOTG2 that I don’t like). This was a good film from what I can remember (as I said it's been a while since I’ve seen a lot of these films). I liked the story arcs, I liked that it was set in places other than America and space (ok, so I’m from England, sue me), I loved Tom Hiddleston in this film and I like Darcy. All in all it was an enjoyable viewing, a little dull at times but generally harmless.

16. Doctor Strange - This would be further up if it wasn’t for how dull the first half hour or so is. I had to go back and watch this months after I had first tried just because the start was so boring. Once I moved past it however it was a great origin film. I liked the humour in it and I have always had a soft spot for magic so it was a brilliant film. The effects were absolutely stunning and on aesthetics alone it would place as the second or third best marvel film. I loved the good guys and was genuinely rooting for them despite Strange being a bit of a snarky arsehole.

15. Iron Man - Is this a very important film? Yes. Is it a great film? Also yes. Do I remember it? Not at all. Okay, so I remember some stuff and what I do remember was great but to say its a film that sticks out would be a lie. It’s THE origin story in as much as it’s a formulaic one: flawed character is traumatised and realises their flaws in the process, is influenced by important person, becomes a hero and is betrayed. It works though. That’s the thing, it works so damn well that its almost not in the formula. It's a great watch and honestly RDJ looks great in it (so not the point but I digress). That bit with Stane ripping out the arc reactor made me feel betrayed and I kinda knew it was coming. ( https://tonynatashas.tumblr.com/post/184375713429/that-scene-in-iron-man-where-obadiah-stane-is this post explains why this scene is so great important)

14. Captain America: The First Avenger - Another (enjoyable) origin story. If Sebastian Stan wasn’t in it it would probably be three places down but hey I have a type. No but seriously this was a great film because not only did it show off the brilliance of Roger’s transformation and gave us an idea of who he was and what motivates him but it also then gives us details of his waking in the 21st century and begins to expose his issues with this time travel (for want of a better phrase). This film shows you what you’re gonna get whilst still having pretty good effects, a good, solid storyline and a pretty badass comic book villain. The serum guy creeps me out though and there are so many ethical issues of that level of human experimentation on a person whose only friend went off to war, had Steve died they chose someone no one would really miss which is so concerning.

13. Captain Marvel - A lot of people may have a criticism of this film being so far down but for me it needs to be. I like superhero films where the main character overcomes a flaw and amnesia is not a character flaw. This is a good origin story but it is not a great marvel film. I like Carol but I don’t love her. I love the fact that we have a superhero film with a female main character and i liked that scene where she talks with biker guy but it felt like Samuel L Jackson was a more interesting character at times. I often rate characters on humor so there’s that. It was a good film but I’m mostly looking forward to what will be done with the character as she has so much potential.

12. Spiderman: Homecoming - This is a weird one for me. It’s the only marvel film I own on DVD and it’s the only one I like where I skip scenes. I can not deal with cringy humour so I skip 80% of the jokes and awkward moments in this film however it’s a really good film. It’s funny and the music is great, I love Zendaya and Jacob Batalon probably more than Tom Holland, their roles are great and the film’s emphasis on friendship is one of the elements from the Iron Man and Captain America films that I love just further amplified. The references to Ferris Bueller and the fact that it is, at its core, a teen flick makes it a brilliant film. The vulture twist was also amazing.

11. Ant-man and the Wasp - I feel like it isn’t talked about enough but I really bloody love Scott Lang. He is one superhero that I can really get behind because above all else he is just the nicest guy. He is probably one of the most human seeming characters in the MCU and it always makes for such an enjoyable viewing. This could probably draw with ant-man in terms of great films. I loved Ava Starr so much and my heart really went out to her and that FBI guy was a total joy to watch. The Ant man films are so funny and light hearted that they don’t have that sort of weariness that other MCU films have. If only Luis told more stories in the MCU.

10. Ant-man - Honestly just look above. Also I love Hank Pym and Hope Van Dyne so much. The villain was kind of eh but I loved the heist aspect.

9. Black Panther - I watched this film for Shuri and to an extent because I felt obligated to so I had low expectations. People were talking about it for the significance of fighting for equality (which I am all for, don’t worry) so I was expecting it to not live up to the hype and it didn’t. That being said it was a bloody great movie. The movie was beautiful, the use of colour and the CGI tech was so damn pretty. The plot was brilliant and for a while I wanted Erik Killmonger to win, he put forward a good argument and I like a ‘baddy’ so to speak. The fights were great and I was so here for their version of going under cover finally not being a hoodie and cap. Was it over hyped? Hell yeah. Was it still a great film? 100%

8. Iron Man 3 - This gets a hell of a load more crap than it deserves, mostly from comic book fans who can’t stand that their precious mandarin was a hoax but honestly I respect the fuck out of marvel for that. Rather than having a stereotypically asian terrorist they turned that stereotype on its head and made the white guy the actual terrorist. Ben Kingsley is one of my favourite actors and he was amazing. I, obviously, also loved the representation of PTSD as a serious issue and how it was displayed in all of its real ugliness. For once it didn’t just show a damaged person who was fixed with romance. So yeah, this film was a masterpiece.

7. Captain America: Civil War - Zemo may just be my favourite MCU villain to date, why? Because he fucking won. This was a film about a man who knew his victims and rather than stupidly trying to attack the big scary strong guys he exposed them and made the best of circumstance. He got under Captain America’s skin and played him like a puppet. This was more than just a villain, this was finally a smart villain. Not to mention that this film had some of the best action sequences and heart breaking moments whilst still having time for a laugh. It’s also the first film (in my opinion) that called out Steve’s morals and his obsession with the past. Bucky was hot used against him and it showed that above all else, even the little people, Steve’s loyalties are with his past.

6. Thor - Most people would disagree and rate this film far lower however for me this was the start. I didn’t grow up watching superhero films because I didn’t like watching TV as a kid so it wasn’t till I was 13 that I saw a superhero film and this was it. I honestly watched it because my friend had it on DVD and I thought Tom Hiddleston looked hot but from what I can remember this was one of the best films I ever saw. I wasn’t too bothered by Jane Foster but I absolutely loved Darcy, Loki and Thor. Whilst I’m not adopted I do know what it is like to be the younger and smarter sibling with an older thuggish brother who is still the favourite so I loved Loki with a passion and was so upset when he fell.

5. Iron Man 2 - This was the film that made me realise that I liked girls, Scarlet Johansson in a black cat suit and red ringlets was an amazing thing to little 13 year old me. Beyond that it was just a solid film, it had spies and daddy issues and sass and Samuel L Jackson. What more can you want?

4. Thor: Ragnarok - This is the peak of Thor, I’m calling it now. Never had a director before been able to capture the absolute chaos of Loki and the sweetheart-ness of Thor so brilliantly. As far as representations of characters this, Captain Marvel and Iron Man 3 may just be the best of all the MCU. This is the full completion of Thor’s arc, this is the film that the first Thor set up. Finally Thor is ready to be King. This film had so much humour but still set it all up so perfectly that it was more than just a comedy. Jeff Goldblum was amazing and honestly Taika Waititi should direct the whole of the MCU. He knows the characters better than anybody.

3. Avengers: Endgame - I cried three times. That scene with the portals was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed and whilst many criticize much of the plot I don’t have too much I’d change, though in fairness I did like the cursed child so maybe I just have a soft spot for all things time travel. Dynamic timelines are not used in cinema enough and the three alternate timelines create have all sorts of implications for future films in the MCU. If Thor is not fat in the next film this may go down to 20th though.

2. Avengers Assemble - This is the film that I believe best represents what the MCU has to offer. It’s a light hearted superhero film with all the characters that were needed at this point in time. For its time it was ambitious and honestly it shows. I loved the dynamics between the characters, the plot was engaging and not overly complex and even if you haven’t seen any other MCU films it makes perfect sense. In some respects it probably is the best the MCU has to offer.

1. Avengers: Infinity War - Oh boy do I love this film. This isn’t just a film, this is the film. Did it have the same emotional impact as Endgame? Fuck no but it didn’t need to. It was serious. It was funny. It had just the right amount of just the right characters and may I just say that is the best that Captain America has ever looked in the MCU. I (controversially) really loved Gamora dying and most of the Guardians being dusted. The memes were great.This was the most ambitious cross over event since Wizards of deck with Hannah Montana. One thing that I can’t get out of my head though is Bruce’s comment of “broke up like the beatles?”. Does that make Bucky Yoko Ono?

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